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How to get a narcissist to leave you alone for good · The Mental Healness Podcast

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  What is going on, beautiful people?
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  On today's episode, we're going to be talking about how to get a
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  narcissist to leave you alone. There's a There's a question,
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  isn't it? If you're new here, My name is
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  Lee Hammock. I'm a clinically diagnosed
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  narcissist. And welcome to another episode
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  of The Narcissist Code. So, boom, Welcome back, Welcome
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  back, Welcome back, folks. Yes.
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  How do you get a narcissist or talk to person to leave you be?
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  How do you get how do you get them to leave you the hell
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  alone? That's the question is, yeah.
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  I think this might be one of the most asked questions in All in
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  all of narcissistic, narcissistic, narcissistic,
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  dumb, the world of narcissism. Like because people want to be
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  left alone. You are a human being.
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  You want your space. You want your time to heal.
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  You want your time to grow. How do you get them to leave you
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  alone? And yeah, I'm like, I need to be
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  upfront about this because you know, I so this doesn't work for
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  every narcissist. There are some narcissistic
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  people, some toxic ass people who just will not leave you
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  alone. You, you, you know, some of them
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  will become obsessive and do things to you, pop up on you and
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  things like that. Like some of them will do that.
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  So the one of the ways to get narcissists to leave you alone,
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  right, is to just become boring to them.
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  What? Like you become boring to them
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  and no longer give them that narcissistic supply, right?
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  Whatever. And this takes a little thought
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  process right here. It might not, it might not take
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  a lot of thought, but they say this takes a little thought.
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  What are they getting from you? Ask yourself that question right
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  there because they can help you get to the point of
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  understanding how to become boring.
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  How to cut that off? How to cut off the narcissistic
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  supply that this person is getting from you, Right.
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  So ask yourself that question right there.
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  How you know What are they looking to get from me?
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  What are they after? You know, what type of
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  validation am are they receiving from me?
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  And then cut it off. See, I'm not telling you to cut
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  it off abruptly because sometimes cutting off abruptly
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  can cause some a visceral reaction, and some people should
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  be afraid of that. But, like, but cut it off even
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  you have to turn it off slowly. Turn it off.
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  They'll they, some of them will become bored with you and leave
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  you alone. Because they're not getting that
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  narcissistic supply. They're not getting that that
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  validation from you that they're seeking.
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  They're not. They're not.
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  You're not giving them what they need to survive and whatnot,
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  right? So they will do that.
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  Like they they, some of them will leave you alone just based
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  on that right there. Because if it's financial
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  supply, you cut that off, then they might leave you alone
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  sometimes. Like, again, y'all.
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  Sometimes they'll become more aggressive.
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  They need that money, they need that money and they need that
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  money in their hands, right? They need that money.
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  They need, they need a hit. So they'll keep bothering you
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  for money, begging you for money or whatever.
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  You know, if it's housing supply, like they if it's
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  shelter, you can't even say. You can't even say shelter
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  supply. If it's shelter.
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  If they have nowhere else to go. Hey, this is my thoughts on it
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  right here. Especially if they're treating
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  you badly and they didn't have to.
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  They they're like choosing to treat you badly, right.
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  And they have nowhere else to go that's on them.
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  Yeah, that's on them. The fact that they're like, I'm
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  going to be homeless. I have nowhere else to go.
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  Yeah, this is the good way to look at it right here.
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  And this is not me trying to pick on homeless people, but
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  narcissistic people that are treating you horribly.
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  They don't have to be homeless, so they just act active
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  correctly or treated you right. Yeah.
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  So in this situation, you just say, hey, look, you're not
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  homeless, you. It's like when you're homeless,
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  you have everywhere to go. You know, the world is your
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  oyster. Your world is your homeless.
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  Toxic, narcissistic oyster. Go live it.
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  You know, go, go, go seek it. Because cutting that off, y'all
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  whatever they're getting from you, if it's is, if it's bedroom
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  supply, cheek clapping supply, cut it off.
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  You have to have some discipline here.
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  If you don't have discipline, you're going to lose.
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  And that's just me being realistic for you.
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  What? You're right there.
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  If you don't have any type of discipline in your life to be
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  able to cut this person off, to be able to to not deal with this
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  person, you're you're just going to lose.
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  You just are. And that's just me being
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  realistic right there. You're going to lose.
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  Like you have to have discipline in all of these matters, right?
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  But especially sexual discipline.
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  If you don't have sexual discipline, you're going to lose
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  because it's the best I've ever had.
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  I just can't live without you. Go lose 100 out of 100 times.
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  You just are. So you haven't had that
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  discipline. Cut off the supply, right?
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  Cut off the narcissistic supply. Cut off the toxic supply.
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  Whatever supply that they're getting from you.
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  Financial sexual friendship, you, you, you, you helping them.
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  Whatever it is. Helping the supply, whatever it
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  is, stop validating them. Make them feel less validated
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  and a lot of them will leave you alone.
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  Another way. You another thing you can do
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  y'all and this is going to be the most abrupt way.
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  Sometimes you have to force them to leave you alone.
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  And this is for the more obsessive, dangerous,
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  narcissistic person, right? You have to force them to leave
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  you alone. Leave.
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  How do you force them to leave you alone?
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  They're bigger and stronger than me. 911, call the police.
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  This is your local Police Department.
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  Arming yourself, doing whatever it takes to protect yourself.
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  Get like, like I said, filing restraining orders if need be.
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  Enforcing said restraining orders.
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  Don't just get a restraining order and don't enforce.
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  If they pop up on you, you have to get.
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  Yeah, yeah. Sometimes you have to force them
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  to leave you alone. Yeah.
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  You know, exposing the threat of exposure.
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  Let me say this to make sure you use discretion because some
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  people don't want to be exposed. Some people don't want to go to
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  jail. Some people will try to harm
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  you. You know, some people are
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  dangerous. So use discretion and protect
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  yourself at all times, right? But literally, you have to force
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  them to leave you alone. And by forcing, I mean,
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  sometimes you have to call the police.
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  Y'all. Sometimes you have to call the
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  police. Sometimes you have to do things
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  like that. Sometimes you have to get a
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  frustrating order. Sometimes you have to call the
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  you know. Some people don't like for you
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  to call their parents or whatever, expose them to their
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  brothers or sisters. Some people don't like you for
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  you to post about it online that you might.
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  Sometimes you might have to expose them.
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  Sometimes that forces them to leave you alone, you know, you
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  have to. And exposure is a whole
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  different category. I just, I I lumped it into
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  forcing it. Because sometimes exposing them
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  can't force them to leave you alone, right?
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  Because they don't. Now they're embarrassed.
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  Now they're they're licking their wounds or whatever.
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  But sometimes, like I just said, some of them will get angry
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  itself. Some of them will become mad as
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  they they'll become mad as the the what they become fiery, hot
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  and angry. And there's like, in order to
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  mitigate the anger, you have to be able to protect yourself.
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  So get a restraining order. Enforce it.
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  Don't drop the restraining order.
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  Right. Because, like, please drop the
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  restraining order. I'll leave you alone.
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  Please drop the restraining order.
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  I'll leave you. No.
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  If you're. If they're talking to you,
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  telling you to drop it, then this this breaking the order.
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  Yeah. If you want them to leave you
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  alone, sometimes you have to force them to leave you to hell
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  alone. So now you have to change the
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  locks. Sometimes you have to.
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  You have to take a stand. Yo, because if you don't,
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  they're just going to try to keep.
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  They're going to keep doing things.
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  They're going to keep popping up at your house.
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  They're going to keep calling your phone.
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  They're going to keep messaging you on social media.
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  They're going to keep emailing you.
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  They're going to keep popping up at your work.
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  They're going to follow you. You see what I'm saying?
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  Sometimes you have to force them to leave you alone.
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  You might have to get them locked up, you know, put them in
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  a what they got, put them in a clink, put them in a clink for a
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  little while, then they help them calm down.
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  Sometimes it'll make them make angry you.
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  You don't. You never cared about me.
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  You're going to get me locked up.
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  You really never cared about me, did you?
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  You never cared about me. Because if you cared about me,
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  you would never get me locked up.
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  You would never get me locked up.
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  If you cared about you gave a damn about me, you would never
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  did that. Blah blah blah blah BBB.
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  That's how it goes right there. Yeah.
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  So that's what I'm saying. Like, sometimes you have to
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  force them to leave you the hell alone in that situation right
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  there, you know, because, like, they, like they want to win.
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  There's a lot of narcissists that they you belong to them,
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  right? They think you belong to them.
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  And so if you're cutting me off, if you are forcing me to leave
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  you alone, if you're calling the police, if you're changing the
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  locks, if you're doing all of this stuff right here, you know
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  that that takes away the narcissistic supply as well.
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  But it also shows me that you might actually be done.
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  It actually shows me that you might actually be done.
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  So you're going to leave you alone.
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  You have to. Sometimes you.
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  Yeah. Sometimes you have to do it by
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  force. You have to do it by force.
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  And like I said last but not least, the last way I would talk
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  about today, it's absolutely go no contact because like I said,
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  because this is like narcissists want to exhaust you going no
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  contact, cutting off access to you, cutting off any form of
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  communication to you, if possible.
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  I know everybody's situation is different.
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  So many people, so many people have kids and you have to talk
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  through parenting apps or intermediaries or whatever.
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  Going no contact can't get them to leave you alone.
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  And the main reason behind that is because they won't access to
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  you. Cutting off their access,
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  cutting off that contact can again, it can drive them crazy
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  and it can make you become obsessive.
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  So sometimes you have to use all, sometimes you have to use a
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  combination of all three. You got to go no contact, force
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  them to leave you alone, expose them and then and then cut off
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  in the arts and systems supply. So you do it all three at once
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  in a lot of these spaces, right? But like I said, going no
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  contact helps you heal and it sends a message to them that you
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  might be done. You know it does.
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  Again, y'all. It doesn't work on every single
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  narcissist. Some narcissists, when you go no
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  contact with them, they become more obsessive.
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  They think you're with somebody else.
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  That's what. That's where the mind goes.
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  You must be with somebody else. You know how you you know how
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  you have this going on. You must be with somebody.
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  You have to be with somebody else.
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  The only reason you don't want to be with me is because you
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  have someone else. Da da da da da da da.
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  You must be with somebody. That's like going.
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  No contact can help you out. But I said, and I'll tell you
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  this right here as well, with going no contact.
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  Going no contact means you. Not only you going no contact,
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  it means your friends and family going no contact as well, right?
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  It means you telling your friends, hey, don't tell me what
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  they have, what they have going online.
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  Don't share messages from them to me.
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  I don't want to hear about them. I don't want anything else to do
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  with them. I'm done with them.
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  It's over. Don't be a third party.
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  Don't be a flying monkey bat. You know, sometimes you have to
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  set boundaries with your friends as well because going on contact
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  you might sometimes, sometimes be be realistic, when you go to
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  a contact, some people are going to choose to be friends and stay
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  stay connected to the narcissist, right?
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  So you have to decide whether or not you want to stay connected
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  to that person who is refusing to leave the narcissistic person
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  alone, right? You have to decide that in your
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  own mind. You're like, well, I got to you
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  know, it's tough because you have to you might have to lose
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  some good friends, right? It's it's tough in this
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  situations and whatnot. So you got to decide what comes
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  next for you. You have to empower yourself.
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  You have to stay as strong as you possibly can.
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  You know, staying strong, staying in power, it helps
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  y'all. It really really does help maybe
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  with y'all they have tuning in to that episode.
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  I really truly appreciate everything audio you know like
• 11:22
  and subscribe for more and as always been doing this at that.
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  Please thank you so much for making it to the end of my
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  video. I am extremely grateful for you
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  have no idea. If you haven't already, make
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  sure you go ahead and subscribe to the channel helps.
• 11:33
  Reach more people and click on the screen to watch another
• 11:35
  video or to browse through another playlist.
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  There's also a link on the screen to check out my courses
• 11:40
  and my support groups to help you heal and understand what
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  you've been through. Thank you so much again.
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  I will see you in the next video.
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  Peace.