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Transcript

"Wedding Planning: From Cost-Cutting Hacks to Extravagant Celebrations" · The Diva Details

• 0:00
  Welcome to the Diva Details. Welcome to the Diva Details.
• 0:05
  Where bold, confident women embrace life unapologetically.
• 0:10
  From love and sex to wellness and reinvention. We keep it raw, real, and powerful.
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  Music.
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  No filters, no limits.
• 0:20
  Just fearless conversations to help you thrive. Let's dive in with Diva Mia and Diva Cat.
• 0:31
  Top of the morning to you, Diva Cat. Yes, good morning, Diva Mia.
• 0:35
  How are you today? I'm good today, actually. Yeah? Yeah. Life is good,
• 0:40
  huh? Life is good. I've been up since 4 a.m. I don't know why.
• 0:43
  Oh, my goodness. What have you been doing lately? My niece getting married. What?
• 0:48
  Yes, and I'm doing all the flowers, all the decorating, the table escape.
• 0:54
  Oh, wow. So you guys are going to do it yourself wedding. Yes,
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  pretty much. Pretty much.
• 0:58
  We do the whole, I mean, we have a lot of aunts and aunts, big family.
• 1:02
  It's going to be like 10 of us. I'm doing the own bouquet and I already told
• 1:06
  them I'm no professional. I'm just going to duct tape everything,
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  make sure it doesn't fall off.
• 1:12
  That's it. This is a duct taped wedding. That's right. Duct taped bouquet.
• 1:19
  Bridal bouquet. Well, I guess you kind of duct tape things together when you do it yourself.
• 1:23
  I know I planned my own wedding, although it was pretty expensive,
• 1:26
  but I did the planning myself just because I have a particular way of doing things.
• 1:31
  Yes, I know you will plan everything yourself. I do.
• 1:34
  Yes, you will not be happy. I figure out everything. Even if I've never done
• 1:38
  it before, I always figure it out. Yeah, my wedding, I have my sisters.
• 1:43
  I hired a three wedding planner. But I was back then, you know,
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  I got married in like deep in the wood in North Carolina.
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  It was very, very inexpensive and affordable. But I only have 80 people on my
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  wedding. I think if I ever get married again, I would hire a wedding planner.
• 1:59
  I said we just go to all-inclusive somewhere. You have somebody else.
• 2:02
  You just get dressed and show up.
• 2:04
  Yeah, but there's still a wedding planner involved. They still plan all the
• 2:07
  activities and things. Yeah, all the late works, right?
• 2:10
  Yeah, when you're going to walk out, what you're going to do.
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  And the reception and everything. Why don't we talk today then about wedding
• 2:17
  planning? I love it. Yeah. This is wedding season, right?
• 2:20
  Yeah, for us, yeah, weddings is spring, yeah. Spring, summer.
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  And for summer, not too much.
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  Too hot in the summer. Too hot. But a lot of people get married now in the spring
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  and the fall. Some people have been like the winter weddings, too. I've seen that.
• 2:32
  You know, weddings are kind of expensive. It's getting way expensive.
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  You got to get honest about the finances. And this is why I say don't get divorced,
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  because, you know, if you want to get remarried, I think we talked about it
• 2:42
  before, one couple remarried three times.
• 2:45
  Having a wedding again is expensive, let alone having a divorce. Right? So...
• 2:49
  If you decide to get married for your first time or get married again,
• 2:53
  it gets a little pricey. Very pricey. I don't know why.
• 2:57
  Well, it depends on how many people you have too, right?
• 3:00
  This wedding is going to be 250 people doing the decoration and the flowers.
• 3:06
  Holy moly. That's a pretty big wedding. Big family.
• 3:09
  But I don't know why. Every time you attach a wedding to it,
• 3:14
  the price is like triple. It does.
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  It does. The floor is one night between $5,000 to $7,000.
• 3:21
  Yes. Yes. Well, and then, you know, you have per head for food,
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  too. For food, too. For caterers and things like that.
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  So at a small wedding, if you have like, I don't know, 20 people or so, it's like $5,000.
• 3:35
  Easy. You can do a small wedding and you're spending $5,000.
• 3:39
  So this is something you may need to plan for in advance or budget for if you're on a tight budget.
• 3:45
  A medium wedding is around $15,000. Yeah. A large wedding is $40,000.
• 3:50
  Is it really? Now, I got married. Okay.
• 3:53
  And my wedding cost $75,000. Holy cow.
• 3:56
  What do you have? Like horse and carriage, everything? We did have a horse and carriage.
• 4:00
  So we got married in downtown Grant Park in Chicago, Illinois.
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  Oh, I've never been to you. In
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  the Rose Garden with the backdrop of the skyline. You take me to Chicago.
• 4:10
  Okay, I shall. Yes. So we got married with the skyline there and it was beautiful.
• 4:14
  And it actually rained that day. I was a member of the Columbia Yacht Club.
• 4:20
  The reception we had at the Columbia Yacht Club, it's a boat that's kind of
• 4:23
  like harbored, that's permanently harbored by Navy Pier. It's not too far from Navy Pier.
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  So then we had limousine buses take people from the Rose Garden to the reception
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  area, which was on a boat.
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  It was completely inclusive. It was, I think it was like $125 or $150 per person for the food.
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  And it was because, you know, the wine was included, the meal was included.
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  We had, you either had a choice of steak or sea bass, and then there was wine,
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  and then it was like a three or four course meal.
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  You know, then by the time you include the dresses and the, you know,
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  but there's other people.
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  I mean, you look at Jeff Bezos and his weddings in the millions is it really
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  yeah so weddings can be you know they say 40 000 for a large wedding and you
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  know the thing that really makes me mad when you pay for a wedding like that.
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  Is when people don't show up yeah i had probably 20 people not show up is it
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  really and i was like that's like 35 400 000 i was like for people just that
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  didn't show up are you really i was so mad and they rsvp'd and then they didn't
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  show and i was like er everyone showed up in my wedding and Awesome.
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  Well, and the best part was at my wedding, the reception after at the end,
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  Navy Pier has fireworks.
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  So everybody thought I ordered the fireworks, too.
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  It's like, oh, yeah, I did that too. Yeah, that's all playing.
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  So Jeff Bezos, here's the numbers on Jeff Bezos' wedding.
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  It's rumored, there's no exact number, but supposedly it costs $500 million.
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  Who's Jeff Bezos? Jeff Bezos is the owner of Amazon, and since I buy from him so much.
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  I did not know who he is. I should know who he is. He's getting married.
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  He's supposed to be doing it on a yacht in Italy. Still $500 million.
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  $500 million? Yeah. So I don't know if maybe he's paying for people to show
• 6:19
  up to. I don't know what the deal is.
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  But that's a pretty expensive wedding.
• 6:24
  Wow. $500 million or $500,000? $500 million. That probably include lodging and
• 6:29
  flying and private jet order.
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  Well, or they're given like $50,000 swag bags. I don't know.
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  Who is married? Is it the first marriage?
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  No, this is his second marriage. Yeah, another source reported it as being a total of $600 million.
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  So somewhere between $500 million to $600 million is Jeff Bezos' wedding.
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  So my little $75,000 one sounded expensive. It'd probably be what?
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  $150,000 nowadays, maybe $200,000. It's nothing compared to Jeff Bezos.
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  Not even 1%. Not even 1%. You can't compare to Jeff Bezos. Yeah,
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  and then you consider the wedding ring and then the dress.
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  And then, well, I kind of went cheap on the dress, actually.
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  Really? I did not get a designer dress. I got something at like one of the bridal
• 7:08
  shops that was off the rack and just had it modified a little bit.
• 7:11
  That's awesome. I went cheap where I could.
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  Yeah. Then, of course, I planned the dang thing myself. So if I would have had
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  a planner, it probably would have been double that. Yeah.
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  Because they would have like not been as frugal as I had been on things.
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  I even send out my own invitations.
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  You did too? I did. Yeah. Wow. Well, we had a budget, but budget was a joke.
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  When things start adding on, it's like, holy cow. You don't realize how much
• 7:34
  it is to throw a party, let alone to throw a wedding.
• 7:37
  Oh, yes. I mean, even if you have a party at your house, guys,
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  you're probably looking at a basic party these days. If you have alcohol,
• 7:43
  too, it's probably $40 to $50 a head.
• 7:46
  Easy. My son's first birthday, we have four cakes. We've been through so many
• 7:51
  alcohols. So many people are drunk for the first birthday.
• 7:53
  I don't know how much money we spend on food. Oh, the first year of birthday
• 7:56
  is so fun. The first birthday, yes.
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  I mean, we had a luau here for my son's eighth grade graduation.
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  And that probably cost, I don't know, $5,000 with the food and the entertainment
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  and stuff. So that wasn't bad. But it was still pricey. Parties nowadays are very spicy.
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  They are getting expensive.
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  Even if you try to go cheap, they get expensive.
• 8:19
  Yeah. Well, I went to the wedding.
• 8:22
  In the morning, they have coffee. They have donuts. The ceremony is at...
• 8:26
  11. Oh, okay. Yeah. They had like mimosa bar. I think that's very reasonable.
• 8:32
  Yeah. I think if you're going to go affordable, you want to go cheaper on the
• 8:36
  wedding, you have to have less people.
• 8:37
  That's really what it is. Yeah. Keep it small. Keep it small.
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  And if it's your second wedding, I think you can go a little smaller unless you're Jeff Bezos too.
• 8:45
  Yeah. Right. So the year we got married, four of us hang out together.
• 8:49
  The year is the year of weddings.
• 8:51
  Yeah. Yeah, so one of our friends actually have a very small wedding at her
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  own father's backyard. That's nice. Very intimate.
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  Everybody sit in just the immediate
• 9:01
  family. They fit everything in her parents' house. They decorate.
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  It's very, very nice. Just family.
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  I mean, she's only shared the pictures after. Yeah. They all sit in like dining table.
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  They make their own, you know, I don't know which kid, but it's so magical.
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  It's so like all the nice. That sounds perfect. Yeah. I've also seen barn weddings
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  are becoming popular, too.
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  Yeah, barn weddings are very popular. Where you run out a barn and they decorate
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  it and then you get married there as well.
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  Yeah, so this couple, they just deal with just the immediate family.
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  And then after, they have their house. You know, obviously, we were older when we got married.
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  And they just had a big 4th of July party at their house. That's it.
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  Weddings can be absolutely beautiful and they can also be pretty tragic.
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  I think you can make it beautiful in a budget.
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  You can. Yes. I'm doing my niece wedding right now. I'm actually super excited.
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  There was a bride that was asking her and guests to contribute in order to be invited to the wedding.
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  Like they had to put like $100 in in order to come.
• 9:59
  Well, I think if you get invited to the wedding, if you RSVP,
• 10:03
  right, you should get it at least to cover your plates, no? I agree.
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  I think that's kind of an unwritten rule. If you're getting invited to a wedding
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  and you know it's at a fancy place, you should at least be able to cover your meal.
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  You don't have to cover the whole wedding. If you know that you're getting steak, it's $100.
• 10:19
  Just give $100. Yeah, I think that's $100 per plate easily. But some people give nothing.
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  And that's the thing, too. It's kind of like rude to get invited to a wedding
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  and then give nothing. So if you're not going to give them a nice gift, don't even go. Don't go.
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  I'm not bragging. I'm not like selling my people out. In Asian community...
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  Some people give 20 bucks. Really? Yes. I'm kind of a stickler on even when
• 10:41
  I go to a kid's birthday party. In a kid's birthday party, it's only $100.
• 10:46
  Well, exactly. I give 100 bucks at a kid's birthday party. So if I go to a kid's
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  birthday party, sometimes I take both of my children, and the cost is, say, 30 bucks per kid.
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  So that's 60 bucks. So I'm always giving 100 bucks because I want them to have
• 11:00
  something beyond the cost of the party.
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  That's what I'm thinking. So just think about, right, two of you go out for
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  dinner, nice dinner, right? Fancy people won't. Oh, that's $200.
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  Yeah, easily. Especially with alcohol, you're then at $300 or $400.
• 11:13
  Right, if you have alcohol, at least, yeah, you just calculate like $300 plus tips.
• 11:18
  Yeah, exactly. See how much you got for just the dinner.
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  Yeah, the nice steak now is $75.
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  Yeah. So you just think about that.
• 11:27
  Right now, I'm actually doing flowers for my niece's wedding.
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  I'm really excited, actually.
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  I like doing those. It's going to be the first flower bridal bouquet I'm making.
• 11:37
  She had five bridesmaids. There
• 11:39
  will be six bouquets. And I have to do boutonniere for all the groomsmen.
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  What colors? The color is very plain. It's just like very simple,
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  like cleanery and white roses.
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  I don't know. They went to the wholesale. They took care to buy all the roses.
• 11:54
  I saw the flower at Costco. They're very perky.
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  Yeah, I love the Costco flowers. Yeah, yeah. Just saying. I love Costco,
• 12:01
  period. Yeah. Okay, so there's our plug for Costco for the day.
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  Yeah, right. I think you have to, when you're planning your own wedding,
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  you have to figure out what your priorities are, though. I think you have to,
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  you know, is dress the most important?
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  Is food? Are the photos? The photos, again, I mean, that was five grand just for the photos.
• 12:17
  For the photographer and the pictures and the, because it's not just one day.
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  Typically, you have the photographer show up at the rehearsal dinner.
• 12:24
  It's a whole weekend event. It's not just a one-day event.
• 12:28
  I think my niece pays $7,500. Yeah. Well, mine was a while ago.
• 12:32
  I know. The photography is expensive.
• 12:35
  The guests, the number of people you have, the food, the flowers.
• 12:38
  The decorations, and then the swag bags. Those swag bags.
• 12:42
  Yeah, I love those swag bags. No, I love them. It gets really pricey.
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  And I organized, I mean, literally, I set up the swag bags myself.
• 12:50
  I did all of that myself trying to save money and it was still super pricey. Oh, wow.
• 12:55
  What'd you put in your swag bag? A gold coin? It was a keychain.
• 12:59
  That's awesome. A keychain, something they could use, and then a little picture frame.
• 13:04
  And then we also had cameras on every table, right? And then you have the fishbowls
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  and all the decorations for all the place settings, etc.
• 13:10
  Yes, yes, that's good placey, yeah. At least they didn't have to do the place
• 13:13
  settings because it was catered, but yeah. Yeah, yeah.
• 13:18
  It's going to be interesting. I'm super excited, actually. It should be fun.
• 13:21
  Yeah. So what is the most expensive thing you think your niece is doing?
• 13:25
  The most, I think they spend at most. And the venue, the venue.
• 13:30
  The venue. We forgot about paying for the venue. We forgot about the venue.
• 13:33
  This venue is like, I think, over $10,000.
• 13:36
  So she's probably in it for $50,000.
• 13:38
  Easy. And this is a cheap, small, well, not small.
• 13:42
  This is a cheap, do-it-yourself wedding. Yeah. Easily $50,000.
• 13:46
  Maybe closer to $100,000. I think close to 100 between the clothes,
• 13:50
  her dress. Well, what are they having for dinner?
• 13:53
  Dinner, they have a choice of filet, chickens, and beef.
• 13:58
  No, filet, chicken, and fish. Yeah, so the food's probably 30 grand right there, maybe 40. Easy.
• 14:04
  So you're at 30 to 40 grand just for the food. Then the venue.
• 14:08
  Yeah. Yeah, she's probably close to $100,000 on this wedding.
• 14:10
  And she had to do on a Friday.
• 14:14
  To save money. To save money. If she would have done it on Saturday,
• 14:17
  the venue would have cost. Even more.
• 14:18
  Just FYI, you think about you're going to get married. You need to start putting money away.
• 14:23
  But either that, put on credit cards, you know. That's what a lot of people do is they charge it.
• 14:28
  Especially when they're younger. And is this her first? Yeah,
• 14:31
  her first. They're in their 20s. They're young.
• 14:33
  I think people do bigger weddings, too, when it's a first wedding.
• 14:36
  Oh, yeah. They go all out.
• 14:37
  Actually, she just won her in her girlfriend. But her mom, the one that went all out.
• 14:42
  So what would you do if you were at your second wedding? would you invite your.
• 14:47
  I don't know. That's a good question, right? No, that's a question for you.
• 14:50
  Oh, no. I think it depends on how close you are to your ex.
• 14:53
  I don't think I would invite my... I might invite his mother.
• 14:56
  I don't know if I'd invite my ex-husband. How about your children?
• 14:59
  So you don't want to... You're right.
• 15:00
  I would have to invite my ex. You have to invite your ex. Yeah.
• 15:02
  I guess it depends on how many years it's been as well since I've been divorced. Uh-huh.
• 15:07
  Inviting your ex is the normal thing to do. That'd be weird though,
• 15:10
  right? That'd be weird though.
• 15:11
  You always worry about the part where they say, anybody that has an objection,
• 15:16
  stand up now or forever hold your peace. and I'm like, oh, crap. Yeah.
• 15:20
  Actually, our friend that had a big, huge wedding, she gone through like five
• 15:24
  dresses, like three. Five dresses? Five dresses, yeah.
• 15:28
  Anyway, she got divorced. But when she remarried again, she flew to Hawaii.
• 15:32
  And just her and her husband now, that's her second marriage.
• 15:37
  Her sister, the bride and groom, it's just like immediate family.
• 15:40
  I think the whole wedding was so many. That's the best way to go.
• 15:42
  Then you don't have to invite your ex either if it's just a small group.
• 15:45
  If it's like 200 people, you're probably inviting your ex.
• 15:48
  If it's, you know. Yeah, they fly everybody to Hawaii.
• 15:52
  Oh, so they pay for everybody's flights, too. I think so. Wow.
• 15:56
  Her sister, her mom, her dad, and she didn't even have a bridesmaid or nothing.
• 16:01
  Well, at that point, you're having a wedding week, not just a wedding weekend.
• 16:05
  Right. People go there just, you know, they'd be vacation out of it. Right.
• 16:10
  Yeah. So a small wedding's considered anything under 30. So anything under 30,
• 16:14
  you can get away with just inviting very select people, friends,
• 16:17
  and family. I think I would have to be over 30.
• 16:20
  Yeah. I know too many people that I would want to invite. I think so,
• 16:23
  too. I think I might even be over 200. You think so? Even second marriage?
• 16:27
  I'd rather be on the top of the list. I don't want to be on the list or C list.
• 16:31
  I want to be on the list. You're a front row, C-girl. That's right.
• 16:34
  I want to be your middle man.
• 16:36
  Oh, you know what? I'm going to walk you down the aisle. Oh,
• 16:39
  you want to be my—no, my dad's still alive, so—.
• 16:43
  That's, yeah. I think what they should do is when you get divorced,
• 16:47
  your ex-husband should be forced to walk you down the aisle and get you to the next person.
• 16:51
  Oh, my God. That should be the room. Wouldn't that be hilarious? I know. Oh, my God.
• 16:56
  All right. So, anyway, let's go back to reality. But a large wedding is,
• 16:59
  like, over 100. So I think I would probably be closer to 200 or so.
• 17:03
  Easy. Yeah. And my last one was limited to 200 because the size of the venue.
• 17:08
  Uh-huh. I mean, with all the people I know in multiple states now,
• 17:12
  with I would invite a lot of people now I don't know how many people would RSVP
• 17:16
  because it's quite a chore for people to travel a lot of times but I mean if
• 17:19
  I made it a good fun weekend yeah I well I love for me I love destination wedding
• 17:24
  because I planned a vacation out of it yeah.
• 17:28
  I have liked some destination weddings the problem
• 17:31
  is is a lot of people don't like them anymore yeah
• 17:34
  because it really it gets expensive for everyone but
• 17:37
  if you have it local you know especially not in a
• 17:40
  hot expensive hotel place it's easier for people
• 17:42
  to travel there yeah oh i love
• 17:45
  destination wedding yeah i love it and what
• 17:48
  you have to do is you have to write the list out and start cutting people that
• 17:51
  you don't have to have you don't have to have everybody you don't and not everybody's
• 17:56
  going to risvp especially on a second wedding when you're older people have
• 18:00
  other obligations it's not like when you're younger and they're like oh wedding
• 18:03
  free food It's not, it's different.
• 18:06
  Yeah. Not as many people come, but I don't know. I mean, I don't know how many people would show up.
• 18:11
  Well, I chose the destination just because my dad had nine brothers,
• 18:16
  sister, right? And my mom, like five of them.
• 18:19
  And I picked a state that nobody leaves. So everyone had to travel.
• 18:24
  Yeah. Anybody who has a going, people who really, really close to me.
• 18:28
  And that's how I was able to cut down to only 80 people. Wow. That's good. Yeah.
• 18:33
  So, yeah. I think the first part or the first step when you try to figure out
• 18:38
  your wedding is the venue.
• 18:39
  The venue, yes. Because that drives everything for the wedding.
• 18:44
  So don't look at the dresses.
• 18:45
  Don't look at the flowers. So we're basically telling you how to plan your own wedding today.
• 18:50
  The first step is to find your venue. So once you have your venue,
• 18:54
  you can then figure everything else out.
• 18:56
  As far as venue goes, you could do a destination wedding. That is a possibility.
• 19:00
  You can do a backyard. Diva Cat was saying she had a friend that got married
• 19:04
  in the backyard. It was beautiful.
• 19:06
  It was beautiful. You can do a park like me. I got married in Grant Park.
• 19:10
  Now, that was a little expensive, you know, because we brought in,
• 19:13
  you know, a string quartet.
• 19:15
  Oh, my God. We had to cater or we had to have all the chairs delivered.
• 19:19
  You went all out. Well, you have to. And it was expensive. And then it rained that day.
• 19:24
  Oh, wow. But it stopped right before the wedding. So that was nice, too.
• 19:28
  Yeah. And then it cooled everything off. So it was nice. But the Airbnbs need to be available.
• 19:35
  I mean, you need to rent or you need to find a place that has Airbnbs or at
• 19:39
  least some good hotels nearby. Because a lot of people don't want to stay in
• 19:42
  hotels. There's got to be enough. You can't go to some remote location where
• 19:46
  there's not enough places to rent.
• 19:47
  You have, if you're going to have destination wedding or any wedding,
• 19:51
  you need to look at like what's the hotel surrounding, not like cockroach hotel, you know.
• 19:56
  Yes, it has to be nice. Nice. It has to be at least a four-star and up. Right.
• 19:59
  The other idea is to do like a small banquet hall.
• 20:02
  I'm not into that. No. You know, people do them.
• 20:06
  I just, for me, it's not, but people do do small banquet halls or even community centers.
• 20:10
  Those, the community center is actually a cheaper way to go.
• 20:12
  So if you want to save money or if you're in a small town, community centers
• 20:16
  a lot of times where you can rent out a VFW or some type of lodge,
• 20:20
  and that's a cheaper way to go. That's what my sister did, actually.
• 20:24
  She got married in a Catholic church, and then you know how the church,
• 20:27
  they have a dining hall. Underneath?
• 20:29
  Underneath. Sometimes, yeah, or next to it. Yeah, that's what she had.
• 20:33
  Yeah, and then sometimes you'll even ask family members to do a potluck.
• 20:37
  That's what she did. Did she? That's the cheapest way to go,
• 20:40
  guys. It really is. Mm-hmm. My brother even cheaper. He fly to Vegas.
• 20:45
  Oh, there you go. Yeah.
• 20:47
  Getting married by Elvis, that's the way to go. That's the way to go,
• 20:50
  yeah. That's what my brother did. Yep, they flew to Vegas and then they had fun.
• 20:54
  Yeah. Pricing can vary. And you
• 20:56
  could even go to a private island that's dedicated to hosting weddings.
• 20:59
  That's the perfect destination wedding that you go and you spend like three
• 21:03
  or four days on a private island just for the wedding. And that's all they do.
• 21:06
  They're used to hosting weddings, so they'll have different activities for the wedding people.
• 21:12
  And it's a full weekend or a whole week if you want. Yeah. And you can also book a resort.
• 21:18
  The resorts can get pricey, but you could book a resort to have the wedding.
• 21:22
  The question is, is who pays?
• 21:23
  Who pays for this wedding? For the flights? Who pays for the hotels?
• 21:27
  And what's customary? And I think it will, there's not really a customary on
• 21:31
  destination weddings. No.
• 21:33
  Can be that you only invite 10 people and you say, if you're coming,
• 21:36
  it's on your dime, but you better make sure that those 10 people can afford the trip.
• 21:40
  I don't know about you, Kat, but every time I go somewhere, it's like $5,000.
• 21:44
  Easy. Because by the time you pay for the hotel and the time you pay for the
• 21:47
  air flare, and if you're gone for a week, it's easily $5,000 plus you have food.
• 21:51
  Yeah, but I think the only, I think the good thing when you have a destination
• 21:55
  wedding, that people who are SVP, they'll show up because they have to pay for
• 21:59
  the, they have to get the flights, everything, right?
• 22:01
  Like you, like your wedding, people don't show up, call you $20,000,
• 22:05
  $30,000 for people who just don't show up.
• 22:07
  Well, I did my destination wedding in Illinois and I'm from Illinois. So most people drove.
• 22:12
  Oh, okay. And I did go with a, I got the hotel we stayed in as well as I got
• 22:17
  a good room rate for people in a cheaper hotel. I think the rooms were only a hundred bucks a night.
• 22:22
  That's awesome. At the cheaper hotel. And it was nearby.
• 22:25
  And it was still a nice hotel. So you can also negotiate blocks of rooms.
• 22:30
  So if your venue is at a hotel or near a hotel or you're having a big wedding,
• 22:37
  I recommend negotiating with the hotel owner to block off a certain number of
• 22:43
  rooms and get a discount.
• 22:44
  And then whenever they reserve the room, they put the discount code in and they get a cheaper room.
• 22:50
  It's just like you're a convention, but it's a wedding. Right.
• 22:53
  So just don't be stressed. I think once you got the venue down,
• 22:55
  everything else follow, don't you think?
• 22:57
  I think so. Once you get the venue down, you can start to put the plan together.
• 23:02
  So first step, let's get the venue down. I think the second step and kind of
• 23:06
  right along lines with the venue is getting your guest list.
• 23:09
  Yes. Because if you know you're going to invite 400 people, but the venue's
• 23:15
  only going to allow for 200, you can't even select that venue.
• 23:18
  So venue and guest lists kind of go hand in hand.
• 23:22
  Expect not everyone to show. When you're paying $100 a head,
• 23:26
  if you can negotiate it with the caterer, and some caterers do this,
• 23:30
  that it's based off the number of people that arrive.
• 23:33
  I might actually, since I had like, I don't know, 5% not show,
• 23:37
  I might actually go 5% under. Most caterers will charge you a set fee,
• 23:40
  so you're going to give them a number, and that number has to be fixed at least
• 23:43
  a week in front of the wedding.
• 23:46
  Once you get your guest list together and your venue, then you can send out
• 23:51
  invitations. Now, how early did they send out invitations?
• 23:53
  They sent out three months. I've seen it as far as six months out.
• 23:58
  Is it six months out? Well, for a destination wedding, for sure,
• 24:01
  but for a local wedding, maybe three months is fine.
• 24:03
  I get to save the date back in last April. Did you? And so you got to say, oh, a year in advance.
• 24:09
  A year in advance saved the date. So that's a planned wedding right there.
• 24:13
  They planned it for a long time. So you can do saved the dates up to a year
• 24:17
  in advance or two years in advance, honestly.
• 24:19
  But if it takes you two years to get wedding, some people don't even get married
• 24:22
  by then. So we're not going to go there.
• 24:26
  So some people do a year in advance
• 24:27
  saved the date. I think six months in advance saved the date is fine.
• 24:30
  Or if it's a destination wedding, give them a six-month notice for an RSVP.
• 24:34
  Because there's a lot of planning that has to go into place.
• 24:38
  And you should kind of know...
• 24:41
  Approximately how many people are going to attend. So if you invite 400 people,
• 24:45
  you're going to know that, oh, 200 are actually going to show up. Yes.
• 24:48
  So 400, if you send out 400, just hoping 200, that's it.
• 24:54
  80%. I think it depends, though, too. I mean, you may have a closer-knit community. Yes.
• 24:59
  Well, our community is super tight. Is it? Yeah.
• 25:03
  So when they get an invite, everybody comes? When they get an invite,
• 25:06
  everybody comes. And they don't, you know, yeah, actually my cousin right now
• 25:10
  going through the fine line to just turn down people. Really? Yeah.
• 25:15
  How do you turn them down if they RSVP? Here's the thing with the Asian,
• 25:17
  right? We have no concept of time.
• 25:19
  You send out the invitation, you always put in RSVP by certain date.
• 25:24
  When certain date don't come, they tend to forget. And they'll call you like
• 25:29
  a week before their wedding. See, they want to come. Oh, no.
• 25:32
  Yeah. I would put in the wedding invitation that it's a firm RSVP. It's a former SVP, yeah.
• 25:37
  So, yeah, it's closer to about 50% when it's a destination wedding,
• 25:41
  but it's 75% to 85% when it's a wedding, just a normal wedding.
• 25:44
  Just a normal wedding, yeah.
• 25:46
  Like in-town wedding. Like an in-town wedding where you have family and friends already there.
• 25:51
  So you're going to get more people to show up if you have a big family in that area.
• 25:54
  Yeah, yeah, this is a big family, yeah. I would say expect 50% to maybe 60%
• 25:59
  if it's a destination wedding for your RSVP list, And then 75 to 80,
• 26:04
  maybe even 85 percent on a regular wedding.
• 26:08
  How about a seating chart, you know, where you put people? So that's so far down the line.
• 26:12
  You know, the seating chart is probably one of the last things you're going
• 26:15
  to do because you're going to once you get the names. I mean,
• 26:18
  I guess you could start working on it.
• 26:20
  And move people around. I know some people do really elaborate seating charts.
• 26:24
  They put together like whole constructs with names and then they can move them
• 26:27
  around. I've seen people do that. Oh, yeah, I've seen that.
• 26:30
  That's a little much, but I
• 26:31
  say just write a piece of paper and do table one, table two, table three.
• 26:35
  But that's just me because I'm efficient with time. But yeah,
• 26:38
  you have to remember that that seating chart is going to matter and you might
• 26:42
  do bigger tables sometimes.
• 26:44
  Then you also have to decide whether you're going to allow people to bring children.
• 26:47
  Oh, no. I think no children. I would allow children at my wedding.
• 26:51
  Really? I had children at my wedding the first time. And they're 12?
• 26:54
  Yes. And I was young. I didn't have kids myself. And I still allowed children.
• 26:58
  We didn't have a lot. Most people did not bring their children. Mm-hmm.
• 27:01
  But we had, you know, a kids table. Yeah.
• 27:04
  Some people won't go to a wedding unless they can bring their children.
• 27:07
  Yeah, it's true. Because they don't like sitters. So you have to make that decision, too.
• 27:12
  Yeah. And then you have to decide, okay, who exactly are we inviting for this
• 27:16
  list, right? So we're still working on the list. and we've got the venue planned, okay?
• 27:21
  We know that we're going to invite, say, 250 people and expect around 200 people
• 27:26
  to show up, okay? And the venue can handle that.
• 27:28
  I would say always make sure that the venue you're booking can handle close
• 27:33
  to the full invite list because what happens sometimes is you make your list
• 27:38
  and let's say you invited 300 people for a venue that holds 200 and 150 replied yes.
• 27:44
  What will happen, like you said, at the very end, people will say yes
• 27:47
  oh wait i forgot to reply and there might
• 27:50
  be some people you forgot that you want to add or some people
• 27:53
  you meet in the coming six months that you want to add to the list that's
• 27:56
  true but that gets expensive it does get expensive so
• 27:59
  everything is a budget right everything costs money let's determine who you're
• 28:03
  going to invite so the first people on the list is family right it's the easiest
• 28:07
  part to go through do you like them or not if you don't like them don't invite
• 28:11
  them yeah you don't that's what i'm gonna say you do not have to invite all
• 28:15
  your family you don't wedding, you can horse it out.
• 28:17
  It's easier to not invite family when it's a small wedding, I will say, than it's a big wedding.
• 28:21
  Because if you don't invite family when it's a big wedding, people are going
• 28:25
  to feel slighted and you might create war between the family.
• 28:28
  But family is the first people you invite. Then you go to your friends.
• 28:32
  Now, the interesting thing is, if you're as old as we are, you don't just have
• 28:36
  immediate friends, you have college friends, you have high school friends.
• 28:40
  You have friends from this job, you have friends from that job,
• 28:43
  you have friends from this location you lived in you have friends from that location
• 28:46
  you lived in all of those people and then you
• 28:49
  have friends of your kids parents right yeah
• 28:52
  your kids parents that you maybe your kid has a best friend
• 28:55
  and his parents want to come it can get it can grow astronomically very quickly
• 29:00
  very quickly so it's a whole event and remember there's gonna be there might
• 29:05
  be a bachelorette party yeah i will have a bachelorette party i will have if
• 29:10
  i get married again the best but it'll be epic Oh, yeah.
• 29:13
  I had the best divorce party, so I will have an epic bachelorette party. Yes. Anyway.
• 29:18
  So, family, friends, don't go crazy because it's going to get pricey. It gets pricey. It does.
• 29:24
  It does. But you're going to have to figure out exactly how big and how many
• 29:27
  people you want to invite.
• 29:29
  And as people get older, too, in our 50s, 60s, 70s, a lot of people have passed.
• 29:35
  Yes. And a lot of people are physically incapable of traveling.
• 29:40
  That's true. So, you may make your guest list and while you're going through
• 29:43
  your guest invitation, find out somebody died or finds out somebody's unable
• 29:46
  to travel or incapable of traveling.
• 29:48
  We don't realize when you're active and we, I mean, we're like crazy active.
• 29:52
  We're doing stuff and, you know, working out every day and we live a good,
• 29:56
  healthy lifestyle. But there's a lot of people in their 50s and I'm in my early
• 29:59
  50s that are not around anymore.
• 30:02
  And I don't want to be, I don't want to come across as insensitive,
• 30:04
  but it is true. It's true.
• 30:06
  And you have to remember that you have to be sensitive as well.
• 30:10
  Because when you send out invitations,
• 30:11
  if you send an invitation out to someone, it's to Mr. and Mrs.
• 30:15
  And maybe their spouse just passed away.
• 30:18
  You've got to be sensitive about that. That's true. I forgot about that part.
• 30:21
  Because a lot of people don't realize that in their 40s, even in their 40s these
• 30:26
  days, 40s, 50s, 60s, a lot of people have passed away.
• 30:29
  So you've got to be so sensitive when you're sending out invitations. Yeah, it's so true.
• 30:34
  You never know. And then you're going to get some RSVPs from people that won't
• 30:37
  come because they can't travel.
• 30:39
  And that is a possibility. Yes. Yes.
• 30:43
  But I love weddings. Weddings are fun. Yeah, especially destination weddings.
• 30:47
  Oh, you're all about the destination. I'm all about destination.
• 30:50
  Well, your wedding would be small.
• 30:52
  And then, you know, not to get
• 30:54
  off topic too much, but some people get remarried when they're married.
• 30:58
  It's like a ceremony to a commitment.
• 31:01
  Yeah, it's a renewable vow or a commitment ceremony to show how committed they
• 31:05
  still are to their spouse.
• 31:06
  That's another thing. That's another wedding. A lot of people do destination
• 31:09
  weddings, re-weddings, I guess, and they're at the 25 or the 30-year mark of
• 31:13
  being married. So you're coming up on your 25.
• 31:16
  I suggest that with my husband. You should. No, he said, he already said no.
• 31:20
  He said, he said no. Well, let's just have a destination 25-year anniversary party then. Yes, yep.
• 31:28
  He said that party, yes. Make it an anniversary party. I mean,
• 31:31
  there's things that you can do, but that's a side note. So now that you've got
• 31:34
  your friends, your family planned out, you've got your list of,
• 31:37
  let's say, 100 people and you're expecting 75 to show up.
• 31:41
  OK, so 75 for every 100 people will probably show. You might have give or take a few more.
• 31:47
  Then you've got to figure out the photographer in advance.
• 31:50
  You've got to figure out you've got to figure out the florist.
• 31:53
  You've got to figure out the dresses.
• 31:55
  The dresses have to be ordered well in advance. The tuxedos,
• 31:58
  not as much, but they still need to be ordered in advance because a lot of times
• 32:01
  they have to get altered.
• 32:03
  And the photographers are huge. Huge. And then you also have to realize,
• 32:07
  are you going to have a DJ or are you going to have a band for the reception?
• 32:12
  I think it's so true. It's also overwhelming.
• 32:15
  All of those things happen at the same week. So you've got your dress.
• 32:20
  Your photographer, your caterer, your playlist.
• 32:24
  You've got to figure all of those things out all at the same time.
• 32:26
  And you have to have your wedding planner who works with you through the agenda.
• 32:30
  If you have your wedding planner, this is how you don't, though,
• 32:33
  because we're doing a do-it-yourself wedding.
• 32:35
  So if you don't have a wedding planner, you've got to plan all those things
• 32:38
  out. Now, there's different checklists out there on different websites that can help you.
• 32:43
  Is there really? Yeah, different wedding planning websites. And that's actually
• 32:46
  what I used way back then.
• 32:48
  Really? I think it was called The Knot. I don't know if it's still around.
• 32:52
  The Knot is what I use. So they have checklists on there. Yeah,
• 32:55
  still around. Still exists.
• 32:56
  Oh, wow. It's free. It's an online planning website. They have a registry.
• 33:01
  Oh, that's the other thing. You're going to want a registry for people to buy you gifts.
• 33:04
  I recommend you don't put anything on there under $50.
• 33:08
  Because somebody's going to buy you that $20 can opener. Well,
• 33:12
  for us, the Asian tradition, we just keep money.
• 33:14
  They don't register. Well, money's fine, too. If you do register,
• 33:17
  there's wedding planning sites. I'm sure there's more than The Knot,
• 33:20
  but The Knot is the one I used way back.
• 33:22
  Basically, they sell advertising and they get paid from that.
• 33:25
  But you get a free wedding planning site.
• 33:27
  You can also have people RSVP right on the site so you can track it.
• 33:31
  You can also send out invitations through the site. You can also purchase invitations.
• 33:35
  It's nice because all the wedding planning sites now, they really help with
• 33:39
  getting you organized, getting everything.
• 33:42
  They can send out the invitations for you. There's a fee, but it's almost like
• 33:45
  having a person there without having a wedding planner. It's like your online wedding planner.
• 33:50
  I recommend only choosing one wedding planning site unless you have to do a
• 33:54
  few other things privately.
• 33:55
  But go through that one wedding planning site because it ties everything together.
• 33:59
  You can order flowers. You can book vendors.
• 34:02
  You can do everything from this one wedding planning site.
• 34:06
  And then it just shows up. They send out an invitation for you too?
• 34:09
  They can send out the invitations for you as well.
• 34:11
  That's the hardest part. It is. Invitation. So you select your invitations.
• 34:15
  You can upload, at least you could, when I did it.
• 34:18
  You could upload distribution lists, and then they printed all the envelopes.
• 34:22
  Back then, they didn't mail them. They probably mailed them today.
• 34:25
  No, they probably would.
• 34:26
  Yeah. Then you can also buy rings. You can buy wedding dresses through them.
• 34:30
  You can do it all in one place. That's awesome.
• 34:33
  And they'll even help you with planning the pre-events. They'll help you with
• 34:36
  your budget. They'll help you write a budget.
• 34:38
  They'll help you figure out your style for your wedding dresses.
• 34:41
  Oh, wow. There you go. And let's talk dresses for a minute, because that's big if you're a bride.
• 34:46
  Remember, you're never going to wear the damn thing again.
• 34:50
  I think I only spent $1,000 on my wedding dress. Compared to the set price of
• 34:54
  my wedding, it was kind of cheap back then. Yeah.
• 34:56
  I went with red bridesmaid dresses, so my wedding was right in red,
• 35:00
  because I wanted them to be able to wear them again.
• 35:03
  The bridesmaids' dresses, I made them T-length in the front with full length
• 35:06
  in the back, so they could wear them out for a night out.
• 35:08
  Because the bridesmaids tend to pay for their own dresses. And then typically
• 35:12
  the bride will pay for their shoes.
• 35:15
  At least in my tradition. What about yours? Everybody pays for their own. Their own shoes?
• 35:20
  It depends. In my tradition, we pay for their shoes, they pay for their dresses,
• 35:25
  and then you also give the bridesmaids a gift.
• 35:28
  They do give the gift. We do give the gift. There's different traditions.
• 35:30
  You need to make sure right at the very beginning when you're planning this,
• 35:34
  if you're marrying someone from a different culture, you need to make sure all
• 35:38
  the culture traditions are followed. Yeah.
• 35:40
  It'll be respectful to both parties and both sides to make sure that if you're
• 35:44
  marrying someone from a different culture, that you're following their culture. Yeah.
• 35:48
  Now, I had an interesting thing happen at my wedding. What did happen?
• 35:52
  My mother-in-law showed me her dress before the wedding.
• 35:56
  Uh-oh. And it was white. Okay. You're not supposed to wear white to a wedding.
• 36:01
  She showed up at your wedding wearing white? She was going to show up at my wedding wearing white.
• 36:05
  Oh, no. It was a dig at me. And she knew better.
• 36:08
  Yeah. So she ended up getting her wedding dress dyed a light pink,
• 36:13
  and you could barely tell it was pink. It still looked white.
• 36:15
  It still looked white. And then at the wedding, everyone came up to me and said,
• 36:18
  your mother-in-law is wearing white. And I said, I know.
• 36:21
  And I just let it go. It was a big scandal at my wedding because my mother-in-law wore white.
• 36:28
  Oh, wow. And I can't tell you how many people came up and apologized for her behavior.
• 36:32
  Now it's kind of ironic. You should not wear white to a woman's wedding.
• 36:37
  Unless they have the reversal wedding, which is trending lately for second wedding.
• 36:42
  So some people are wearing black dresses and having the entire crowd wear white.
• 36:47
  That is, I saw that too. It actually is stunning looking. Very stunning.
• 36:52
  So it's like a white party, but the bride is wearing black.
• 36:55
  Yeah. Yeah, the bride and the groom wear black and everybody else wears white.
• 36:59
  Yeah, this one, the bride wearing like bright, bright pink. And the groom had
• 37:02
  the tie, that bright pink, that master bride. Yeah. Everybody else wear white.
• 37:07
  So unless you know for sure what the color scheme is, and usually the color
• 37:12
  scheme matches the invitations.
• 37:14
  Unless you know what the color scheme is, you shouldn't be wearing white to
• 37:17
  a wedding. Now, if they say this is a white party, then yes,
• 37:20
  you wear white to the wedding.
• 37:21
  They'll tell you if it's not normal, but typically the bride will wear white.
• 37:25
  And you should not wear white. You should not wear off-white.
• 37:28
  You should not wear light cream. Yeah. You should not wear pastel pink.
• 37:32
  Yeah, pastel pink. That looks like white. It is white, especially in the pictures.
• 37:36
  It looked white in all the pictures. pictures.
• 37:38
  I'll have to show you the pictures someday, but it looked white.
• 37:41
  Actually, I can't because my ex-husband kept all my wedding pictures.
• 37:44
  You let him kept that, all of that? Yes, I did.
• 37:46
  Anyway, so you have to remember there's certain things you can and can't do
• 37:51
  at a wedding. The other thing is how do you pick your vendors?
• 37:54
  There's like the florist and the decorations and the DJ or the band.
• 37:59
  All of those vendors, you need to make sure that they're going to show up,
• 38:03
  that they're planned and scheduled and coordinated, and that they're good.
• 38:07
  A lot of people go off of Google reviews. You have to be careful sometimes with
• 38:11
  Google reviews, especially if there's only one or two of them.
• 38:13
  You need to figure out what is your wedding themed?
• 38:16
  I mean, some people are doing luau weddings now. Those are fun. Those are fun.
• 38:19
  Some people are doing pool party weddings.
• 38:22
  Yeah. But I think DJ is must. You have to I like a DJ.
• 38:26
  Please select DJs. Because the DJs also, not just they play the music,
• 38:30
  they do all the MCs, you know, all the announcements.
• 38:33
  Yeah, they do the MCs. They do the toasts.
• 38:37
  They do all that. And you have to give them a playlist to make sure they'll play your playlist too.
• 38:41
  Yeah, that's another thing. I don't want a DJ just doing house music nonstop.
• 38:44
  I want it to kind of hit my age group or genre.
• 38:48
  Yeah, so that's the DJs. That's the bartending. Yeah.
• 38:52
  Well, the bartenders typically will be taken care of by the caterer,
• 38:55
  hopefully, or the venue.
• 38:58
  It depends on where you book. And sometimes the venues already have their caterers
• 39:02
  that are, you get a pick between one or two, or you may not get a pick at all.
• 39:06
  They may have their own caterers. That is so true, yeah.
• 39:08
  I think our wedding, we have a choice of four, which one we could use.
• 39:12
  Yeah, but they give you the list of the name that you could use.
• 39:15
  And then you also have the option, I mean, we are talking about doing it yourself,
• 39:18
  But you also have the option of just say, hey, I'm tired. I don't want to do it.
• 39:22
  And just hiring a wedding planner to do it all.
• 39:24
  You just give up control when you do that. Just realize that.
• 39:28
  You give up complete control and the wedding will end up the way the wedding ended up. Yeah.
• 39:32
  But they will handle all the stress. You don't have to worry about it.
• 39:35
  They will handle scheduling all the vendors and making sure everything gets
• 39:38
  taken care of. I will say one thing is very important.
• 39:41
  About two weeks before the wedding, you re-verify the venue,
• 39:44
  the caterers, and everything.
• 39:47
  Photographer. The photographer, the caterers, the DJ. You just check with everybody
• 39:52
  to make sure they remember and it's on their schedule.
• 39:55
  And then a few days before the wedding, you just follow up with any last minute
• 39:59
  things that you have to discuss and just re-verify the date and time that they're
• 40:03
  going to be showing up. You have to schedule all of that.
• 40:05
  Oh, that's a lot of work. It is a lot of work. That's why you need one of these
• 40:09
  wedding planner sites like I use. Back then they also had books.
• 40:13
  So you could buy the book. Like a scrapbook? Like, no, just a book to make your
• 40:18
  notes and schedule and plan.
• 40:19
  And they would tell you like, oh, one month before the wedding, you have to plan this.
• 40:23
  Two months before the wedding, you have to plan this. So it helps keep you on task and on track.
• 40:29
  Any type of wedding planning site
• 40:31
  that you can join if you're planning it yourself, I highly recommend it.
• 40:35
  Even if you have a planner, it will help you kind of follow along and keep the
• 40:39
  planner on target too. Yeah.
• 40:41
  Because some planners can get a little scatterbrain. Not every wedding planner
• 40:44
  is the same. You have to stay close, communicate with your planner. You do.
• 40:48
  You're going to be like married to them before you get married to your partner. Yeah.
• 40:52
  Yes. And then take a nice honeymoon. That's highly recommended.
• 40:55
  Yeah. So in our tradition, typically, no, we pay for our own wedding and we
• 40:59
  pay for our own honeymoon.
• 41:00
  But one side of the family will pay for the wedding and the other side will pay for the honeymoon.
• 41:07
  The honeymoon was $25,000.
• 41:09
  We went to Fiji for two and a half weeks. Holy cow. It was expensive.
• 41:14
  It was not cheap. But he's so well worth it, though.
• 41:17
  It was expensive. I mean, maybe it was $20,000, but it was expensive like heck.
• 41:21
  But he's well worth it. It is. It wasn't the best honeymoon either,
• 41:26
  but it was worth, you know, trying out a new place.
• 41:30
  Oh, we forgot about this. You
• 41:31
  have to have a hairstylist and makeup stylist for the day off. Oh, yes.
• 41:37
  Unless you have someone in the family that can do it, but your hair and makeup.
• 41:40
  And a lot of people will do an updo if you have long hair
• 41:43
  and you want to go and have it practiced prior to
• 41:46
  the wedding you'll go to the hairdresser like a month before and
• 41:49
  you'll say and they'll try different styles until you figure out what works
• 41:53
  with your veil i didn't do any of that i had a crown and a veil i had my hair
• 41:57
  done up they came to my hotel room actually to do my hair and they came to my
• 42:02
  hotel room to do my makeup so i had a makeup person and a hairstylist that did
• 42:06
  my hair and makeup before the wedding?
• 42:08
  Well, my friend did my hair and my sister friend did my makeup.
• 42:12
  I did not pay for that. That's great. And we have crazy curly hair, so it's good.
• 42:17
  But you have to have somebody that knows how to do your hair.
• 42:19
  And you can decide, you know, on your budget, how do you want to do?
• 42:23
  Do you want to rent stuff? Do you want to buy stuff? Like, for instance, the wedding dress.
• 42:27
  There are wedding dress rentals. You can rent it. You can rent it. You don't have to buy it.
• 42:32
  All of these things you have to plan in advance, and you can't leave it to the last minute.
• 42:37
  Otherwise, you're going to stress everyone out around you. And you do need to
• 42:40
  have good support stuff. Like I had some great friends. I didn't have any family helping me. No.
• 42:44
  But I had a lot of friends that came around and helped.
• 42:48
  And it was a very good wedding. And you have to really figure out the budget ahead of time, right?
• 42:53
  Yeah. Some people, I think a lot of people do a mix.
• 42:57
  Sometimes they hire the wedding planner to coordinate the vendors,
• 43:00
  coordinate the day of, but they may not be coordinating everything.
• 43:04
  Or maybe they help with the invitations.
• 43:05
  A lot of people are doing a mix of a wedding planner and do it yourself.
• 43:08
  So a lot of wedding planners will say, this is package number one.
• 43:11
  And I'll do all these things for you for a specific price.
• 43:14
  So you can do that, too. If you don't want to have a full-on wedding planner
• 43:18
  and you want to do some stuff yourself because you want to keep control of certain
• 43:22
  things, you can do that as well. Yeah. I didn't do none of that.
• 43:25
  I didn't fly down to my wedding till a week off. Well, now they're not just
• 43:30
  called planners. They're called wedding stylists.
• 43:33
  It's a whole trend. Yeah, they're expensive, too.
• 43:36
  Yeah, and then the invitations are expensive, too. I think they were like three to
• 43:40
  five dollars back then per invitation I think it's
• 43:43
  close to 10 bucks yeah and then you got a mail amount but you
• 43:46
  could also do evites if it's a small wedding or it's a destination wedding you
• 43:49
  can do an electronic invitation and then they just click on it and say that
• 43:54
  yes or no now if you're going to do evites I recommend you follow up with a
• 43:57
  phone call or a text message after yeah because a lot of people don't check
• 44:00
  their email anymore email has become something like I don't know it's like,
• 44:04
  The junk pile that everybody leaves in the corner to check once a month or something,
• 44:08
  you know? Nobody checks their email anymore. I don't.
• 44:10
  I have to admit that. It's like if it's on text or if it's a voicemail,
• 44:14
  those are the people. Because there's so much junk email now. It is.
• 44:18
  I get 2,000 emails a day. 2,000? 2,000 emails a day. Because I have multiple
• 44:22
  businesses. So I get 2,000 emails a day. You might have to hire somebody.
• 44:25
  Just go through your email. I know. I have multiple different filters. Yeah, yeah.
• 44:30
  But anyway, so you can do eVites. Just make sure you follow up with a phone
• 44:33
  call or text message after.
• 44:36
  That way people don't feel slighted if they forgot to check their email.
• 44:39
  I'm all fault about Evite. I think because of invitation, people throw it out.
• 44:43
  Wait, they do. And you can do both.
• 44:45
  If it's a smaller wedding, you could do an Evite and a printed.
• 44:48
  That way people have both. Because some people like to keep those and they scrapbook them.
• 44:52
  Yeah. I don't know anybody's scrapbooking anymore. That used to be a thing.
• 44:54
  That used to be a thing. I don't.
• 44:56
  And I think in life you do what makes you happy and it doesn't even matter.
• 45:01
  So the evite for the wedding is okay?
• 45:03
  Evites for the wedding is okay. Now, if you're doing a whole week or a whole
• 45:06
  weekend, people send out what's called custom invitation suites.
• 45:11
  It's basically multiple invitations in one. So it's a pretty thick invitation.
• 45:16
  Like all activities, everything? Well, it'll be like your invitation, your RSV card.
• 45:22
  Because, you know, when you send out an invitation, it's not just the invitation.
• 45:25
  It's an invitation with the RSV card. But it could also be an invite to the
• 45:30
  wedding rehearsal dinner.
• 45:32
  It could be an invite to some activities if you're having a whole week long of activities.
• 45:36
  It can be a whole bunch of things. You could have a schedule in there for different
• 45:40
  activities that people can join.
• 45:41
  I don't recommend prepaying for people to go to activities.
• 45:47
  Just because people will say they will, and then they don't show up.
• 45:50
  I recommend you having them available, and people can sign up maybe off of a website.
• 45:55
  I do recommend having your own personal website. Website.
• 45:59
  Because with a wedding website, you have the ability to change things if you need to.
• 46:04
  And people can RSVP on there, and they can get updates and information about
• 46:10
  different activities going on, and you can add stuff.
• 46:12
  So let's say that a month before the wedding, and you just put on the invitation,
• 46:17
  please make sure to check the website prior to coming.
• 46:20
  But let's say a month before the wedding, you're like, let's have a morning
• 46:23
  hiking trip two days before the wedding just to reacclimate with the whole family.
• 46:27
  And it's family only. You could put that on the website, right?
• 46:29
  Yeah. There's certain things you could do.
• 46:32
  A wedding is a nice thing because it's almost like a family reunion.
• 46:36
  It's true. You get to invite people you haven't seen for a really long time.
• 46:40
  And you get together. It goes so fast, though, I will say. It goes so fast.
• 46:44
  Our wedding was so much fun. People still talked about it.
• 46:47
  The night before the wedding, we went out. We didn't come back till 3 a.m.
• 46:51
  It was a late night. It was a late night. Yeah, we have horse carriage in our wedding, too.
• 46:57
  Yeah. Yeah. And there's the other thing. You might want to have an after hours, after venue.
• 47:01
  Because if you're having it at a, let's say you have it at a venue,
• 47:05
  and the venue shuts down at 10, People like to go afterwards and hang out together.
• 47:11
  It's true. So you might want to have a, hey, come back to my house or,
• 47:14
  hey, go here if you want to hang out after.
• 47:16
  It doesn't have to be like as formal, but you should have a place for people
• 47:21
  to congregate after the wedding if they choose to.
• 47:24
  We went to my best friend's daughter's wedding in Napa Valley.
• 47:28
  So the wedding is in the winery and they're closed by 10. And after that,
• 47:32
  she actually reserved a bar for you to go after.
• 47:35
  And it listed all out right in the invitation. That's nice. Yeah.
• 47:39
  That's nice. That was a fun wedding. Yeah, because most people,
• 47:42
  they aren't shutting it down at 10 o'clock unless they're not able to go party some more.
• 47:46
  Yeah, at the winery, 10 o'clock was done.
• 47:49
  Yeah, but it was beautiful. It's so magical.
• 47:52
  Have you been in Napa Valley? I have been, yes. It's just like castle.
• 47:56
  That's what I would do again if I'm going to have my 25. Your destination is
• 47:59
  at Napa. Your destination wedding celebration.
• 48:03
  25 wedding celebration. Or anniversary.
• 48:05
  Let's call it an anniversary. Your anniversary celebration is going to be in Napa Valley.
• 48:10
  Yeah, 20th actually coming up. Are you gone? In two years, yeah.
• 48:14
  Okay, I'm there. I would love to. You don't have to tell me twice.
• 48:18
  I don't drink anymore, but they have really good food there, too.
• 48:21
  Yes. This winery is called Castello de Amore, the Castle of Love.
• 48:27
  Oh, that's nice. We actually bought tons of wine there, become a member.
• 48:31
  I think if I did a destination wedding, it would be in Scotland in a castle because I'm Scottish.
• 48:37
  I'm there because there's a place that I've never been. Yeah,
• 48:41
  Scotland. I want to go there.
• 48:42
  And there's some nice-looking Scottish men, too. So maybe I won't even just
• 48:45
  go for a wedding. I might just go and find myself a Scottish man.
• 48:48
  Let's just do that first.
• 48:51
  I'm on it. Let's plan. All right. So let's talk about timeline.
• 48:56
  Again, I said you got to have an app. So there's another app called Zola.
• 48:59
  It's a wedding planning. I like the not personally, but I have never used Zola. It's a newer app.
• 49:05
  It might be a great one. There's other types of wedding planning.
• 49:08
  Not ones out there. It's not as big as this.
• 49:10
  Now, this is one of those things I don't think AI is going to take go over.
• 49:13
  I think it's going to be, it's a manual process. A lot of it is because it's
• 49:16
  based off a personal preference.
• 49:18
  Because he's personal. There's also one called Minted.
• 49:20
  Minted. Minted. M-I-N-T-E-D. And Wedding Wire.
• 49:24
  They're very popular to use a planning site. People do say The Knot has the
• 49:29
  all-in-one approach, though. It's got everything.
• 49:31
  And it had mostly everything back then.
• 49:34
  Wedding Wire is more for just finding vendors and creating your website,
• 49:38
  managing your guest list zola is nice
• 49:41
  too but it's it's not all in one that's why
• 49:44
  i think i really do recommend the knot the knot is very
• 49:47
  popular the knot t-h-e-k-n-o-t the knot and it's the knot.com yeah and then
• 49:54
  there's minted which is like just a stationary place you can your weddings your
• 49:58
  website everything kind of looks the same and there's several other smaller
• 50:02
  ones but But if you're doing it yourself,
• 50:05
  I highly recommend The Knot because The Knot will just ease your wedding planning so much.
• 50:11
  They create the website, everything for you, don't they? Well,
• 50:13
  yeah, they give you a template. You select your background and then you can
• 50:17
  also put your guest list in.
• 50:18
  And then people can RSVP right there.
• 50:21
  Now, if you're going to have a printed, like if you're going to have a,
• 50:23
  you got to make sure you track it in one location because I have seen people,
• 50:26
  they track it in two locations and their numbers get off.
• 50:29
  So wherever you track it, track it in one location. And then you have your bachelorette
• 50:34
  party, which is usually about a week before the wedding or so.
• 50:36
  Do not skip bachelorette parties. Yes, bachelorette parties are fun.
• 50:39
  And a lot of people are going for spa days for bachelorette parties.
• 50:42
  I was actually at a spa last Friday and there was a bachelorette party there.
• 50:45
  Yeah. Maybe it was starting at the spa and going for something else later that
• 50:49
  evening. But a lot of people go for spa days for bachelorette parties.
• 50:53
  I don't know what the guys do. Maybe go golf and then have a bachelor party
• 50:56
  at night. But there's a lot of different things that you may want to do.
• 51:00
  Here's the other thing. If you want, you can just hire a day of the wedding coordinator.
• 51:04
  If you don't have a big budget, they know the process. They know what's going
• 51:08
  on. And they keep everybody on track.
• 51:09
  When you get stragglers that don't know where they're going,
• 51:12
  they'll be there to direct them. And you can hire a group of people to be the
• 51:15
  day of the wedding coordinator. That's awesome.
• 51:18
  Now, is it a must to have a bridal party? How many do you have their bridesmaids?
• 51:23
  I had eight. I see. I didn't have any.
• 51:25
  I had eight people on. We had eight bridesmaids and eight groomsmen because I love the number eight.
• 51:32
  You love number eight. I love the number eight. And I was younger.
• 51:36
  Well, I was, I guess I was in my thirties, but for me, it was,
• 51:41
  I wanted to have all my college friends.
• 51:43
  I had a lot of college friends, some friends from previous jobs there,
• 51:46
  people that had recently been close to me.
• 51:48
  So it was a pretty big wedding party. Yeah.
• 51:51
  Yeah. Eight is pretty large. I mean, I've seen bigger.
• 51:54
  Typically, people do two or three is normal. Eight is large.
• 51:58
  A dozen is, I've seen that too. Yeah, I've seen 13.
• 52:02
  Yeah, I say do what you want. Bridal party goes. Yeah. Now, here's the little details, okay?
• 52:08
  Don't forget the marriage license. Oh, my God, yes.
• 52:11
  Wherever you're getting married, whatever state, whatever location,
• 52:15
  you're going to have to go to the county and get a marriage license.
• 52:18
  You do it a week before, though.
• 52:20
  Yes, but don't forget it. It's very important. Oh, yeah, yeah.
• 52:23
  If you don't get your marriage license and you get married, you're not married.
• 52:25
  Okay? So get your marriage license in advance so that you have it.
• 52:28
  And then whoever marries you can sign off that you got married. They can sign off, yeah.
• 52:31
  Then you should have an emergency kit. What do you mean emergency kit?
• 52:34
  An emergency kit is there for emergencies like...
• 52:39
  Hairspray and tweezers and band-aids and anything that could go wrong.
• 52:45
  Well, a sewing kit should be in your emergency kit.
• 52:48
  It's interesting that people don't remember to do the emergency kit and then they're like, oh crap.
• 52:52
  So here's some other things that need to go in your emergency kit just so you have it.
• 52:56
  So make sure you have bobby pins because your hair is going to fall out of it
• 52:58
  to updo. It just will. You're going to need some hair ties.
• 53:02
  I say tennis shoes because when you wear those heels all day long.
• 53:05
  Now, because we get married in a rose garden, I got everybody flip-flops i had
• 53:09
  platform flip-flop yeah so make sure the shoes are comfortable but also have
• 53:15
  a pair of really comfortable shoes to switch into if you need to,
• 53:18
  extra earring backs because a lot of people lose the back of the earrings oh
• 53:22
  i didn't think of that yeah extra earring backs safety pins because you know
• 53:25
  what's going to happen is you're going to lose weight because you're going to
• 53:27
  be stressed out right before the wedding and now you got a safety pin up that
• 53:31
  dress sewing kit like i mentioned before scissors tissues like And just tissues are nice to have.
• 53:38
  Don't the venue have all this for you in the woman's room? Don't you know?
• 53:41
  It depends on where you're getting married. I didn't get married in a venue.
• 53:43
  I got married in a park. Oh, yeah, in the park, yeah.
• 53:45
  Feminine products, guys. Oh, God, yes. When you're stressed out.
• 53:48
  And even if you're past your 50s and you're past your days of your period.
• 53:54
  Sometimes stress will bring it on, honestly.
• 53:56
  I had period right on my wedding day. It causes it sometimes from the stress.
• 54:01
  Sometimes people in the bridal party will be like, oh, crap,
• 54:03
  I just started my period. And they forget. And they don't have anything.
• 54:05
  Yes, yes, yes. Everything that you think could be forgotten will be forgotten that day.
• 54:09
  So to have an emergency bag is the best way to go.
• 54:13
  It is worse than you pack it up to go to a hospital for giving book. Yeah, it's worse.
• 54:18
  Don't forget a nail file because somebody's going to break a nail.
• 54:21
  You're going to need the Band-Aids. Double-sided tape. So what happens is maybe
• 54:25
  somebody's hanging out of a dress or the dress isn't fitting as well as it did at the fitting.
• 54:29
  Double-sided tape can actually help.
• 54:31
  It's a wonderful thing to have. You can use it to help your dress.
• 54:35
  You can also use it to help when, like, the flowers or the decorations fall down.
• 54:39
  So double-sided tape for the decorations party, which is you're going to need, is crucial.
• 54:44
  And you can get double-sided tape. You don't need to use duct tape. Thank you so much.
• 54:48
  Don't use duct tape. I only need duct tape. go to amazon order
• 54:51
  double-sided tape it's very cheap and that really
• 54:54
  helps with the decorations then body glue
• 54:57
  okay so what is body glue it keeps jewelry
• 55:00
  in place it's not permanent glue but like
• 55:03
  if you have certain jewelry and you're dancing around it's
• 55:05
  going to like fly everywhere so as well
• 55:08
  as some people put glitter on like like big spots of glitter
• 55:11
  or a lot of little tattoos so bloody
• 55:14
  glue is good q-tips are always useful oh
• 55:17
  yeah q-tips right a must q-tips are
• 55:20
  the best because it helps with everything something
• 55:23
  mascara mascara crying yeah oh and
• 55:26
  you should also have some powder like powder for whatever your skin tone is
• 55:30
  have lotion too because you're you may be really dry your lips may be dry you
• 55:35
  might need chapstick it's amazing and here's the thing dental floss people don't
• 55:39
  think of but dental floss is so useful yes because you never know when you're
• 55:43
  going to tie something together as well as you might need it for your tea.
• 55:45
  Or you drink something or you eat something right before and it gets stuck.
• 55:49
  So have that dental floss with your toothbrush, your toothpaste,
• 55:52
  have that have that around.
• 55:54
  And then I needed this one big time on my wedding day, stain remover wipes.
• 55:59
  Oh, my God. So I told you I got married on a boat, right? It was a big yacht, right?
• 56:05
  It was actually like one of those old ship liners that they used to travel from
• 56:10
  Europe to here, like huge ship.
• 56:12
  And inside they have this enormous area that's like the banquet area.
• 56:16
  Well, to get out, you know how the doors are on ships? It's like a metal crank
• 56:20
  that you open up and then you walk through it. Okay. And I had red wine.
• 56:24
  And somebody hit me, my arm, and it splattered right down the front of my dress.
• 56:29
  Oh, my goodness. So then, like good bridesmaids, they were all like switching.
• 56:34
  All the bridesmaids bring club soda over. They're all reaching down the front
• 56:37
  of my dress. Oh, my goodness.
• 56:40
  I had like eight hands of eight women down the front of my dress trying to get
• 56:44
  all these stains off. And after a while, I just didn't care.
• 56:46
  I was like, you know what? I already did pictures. I don't care.
• 56:48
  So it's okay. Pictures are done. If the pictures hadn't been done, I might have been upset.
• 56:52
  But the pictures were already done, so it was okay. But have some stain remover
• 56:55
  wipes, especially if you're wearing white.
• 56:57
  And I don't recommend drinking red wine the day of your wedding until later.
• 57:01
  So you highly recommend pictures have to be taken before. I do the pictures
• 57:05
  early because you're going to dance. You're going to squish cake in each other's faces.
• 57:09
  You're going to eat. You're not going to look good after a while.
• 57:12
  So pictures have to be done immediately right after the ceremony.
• 57:15
  And then they let everybody kind of go get situated over at the venue.
• 57:19
  I recommend that is the best way. you take like an extra 30 minutes that everybody
• 57:23
  else, and then you have your grand entrance.
• 57:26
  Some people lately have even been planning.
• 57:28
  Different types of dance routines like as their entrance coming in we took the
• 57:33
  first dance class which no like they have a dance routine like the bridesmaids
• 57:37
  come in and they do a dance routine and then the grooms come in it's been cute
• 57:40
  i've been seeing them on i've seen them tiktok etc,
• 57:43
  and they should have tylenol too like you're gonna people are gonna have headaches
• 57:47
  and it's gonna be a stressful day it's gonna be yeah and take the breath mints
• 57:51
  for your oh my god yes whomever forgot to brush their teeth you know what i
• 57:55
  mean and like for mine i had to have bug spray because it was outdoor wedding.
• 57:59
  So we had bug spray as well. It was in a little baggie, but not really give it to everybody.
• 58:03
  You thought of everything. It was a lot. Wow. And then don't forget a lighter. Okay.
• 58:09
  If you have candles on the tables, you're going to need to get all the candles
• 58:12
  lit. AA batteries. Somebody's going to need something for a battery,
• 58:15
  maybe the camera or something.
• 58:17
  And then make sure you have a pen and don't forget the bridal signing book where
• 58:22
  everybody gets to sign in that they came.
• 58:24
  Do you know a lot of weddings, a lot of venues now don't let you use the real
• 58:28
  candle? Really? Yeah, the one that we used this weekend.
• 58:32
  They've been through like four or five of them. Every one of them say battery-operated
• 58:36
  candles. That's interesting.
• 58:38
  Yeah, you can light the candles. I think it's insurance and fire hazard.
• 58:41
  I think there's been too many movies where people catch venues on fire from
• 58:45
  weddings. I think so, too.
• 58:46
  Yeah. Actually, we talked to the venue owner. They said they kept their insurance down halfway.
• 58:52
  Well, there you go. So you might not be able to have real candles,
• 58:55
  and you need to negotiate that out in advance, too. Yeah, yeah.
• 58:58
  Now, don't forget the cake. Oh, the cake, yes. The cake has to be ordered in advance as well.
• 59:03
  Now, did you agree to spend a lot of money on the cake or just, like, neutral cake?
• 59:08
  We spent money on the cake. Oh, okay. We did. We did.
• 59:11
  And I don't like the buttercream frosting. I think we did whipped cream frosting
• 59:15
  or something because I don't like the really heavy frosting.
• 59:17
  It depends on what you want.
• 59:19
  The cakes are expensive, too. I mean, you can't even get a birthday.
• 59:21
  Some of the birthday cakes are like $100 for a small birthday cake these days.
• 59:25
  If you go to a bakery, cakes are expensive. That's awesome.
• 59:29
  My sister did my wedding cake. We spent money on the cake, but that's because
• 59:33
  we had, you know, 200 people there.
• 59:34
  It depends on the size of your venue. You're not making your own cake if you have 200 people. Yeah.
• 59:39
  My sister made my own cake. Well, is she good at that? Well,
• 59:42
  she's a baker, yeah. Oh, well, that works. Yeah. If she's a baker, then there you go.
• 59:47
  From a pricing perspective, as we wrap this up, a $5,000 wedding,
• 59:52
  the cheapest way to go is just to have it in your backyard.
• 59:55
  Oh, yes. Have it at a friend's house. Have it at a park.
• 59:58
  You can have 30 people or less. You can even rent a food truck that lets people
• 1:00:03
  buy their own food if you want to.
• 1:00:05
  Do you know Costco also do wedding cakes and very reasonable? Oh, wow.
• 1:00:10
  I know they do birthday cakes, but I didn't know wedding cakes.
• 1:00:13
  Yeah, they do wedding cakes.
• 1:00:14
  Well, and there you go. You can get a Costco wedding cake. You can also do the
• 1:00:18
  potluck that we talked about before or do a food truck.
• 1:00:20
  Or you could pay for the food truck and then just have it pull up and it's preset.
• 1:00:24
  I think it's so cute. It is. The band wedding with the food truck. Yeah.
• 1:00:29
  You know, different kind of food truck. Yeah. And I'm a coffee drinker.
• 1:00:33
  They have a multi-coffee truck.
• 1:00:35
  It's super cute. I think if you can have something unique, that's the reason
• 1:00:40
  why I don't like having it like a convention center or something.
• 1:00:44
  I like having the uniqueness to a wedding.
• 1:00:47
  That's what I like about weddings is the creativity behind it. The flowers.
• 1:00:51
  I mean, you're going to make some beautiful flowers, I know.
• 1:00:54
  And it's the creativity that you come to that's not normal, right? Right.
• 1:00:58
  Your playlist with your DJ, for me, that's crucial. Oh, yeah.
• 1:01:02
  It's a must. It's a must. And that can be creative, too. Like,
• 1:01:05
  you can come up with songs from different genres. You might have a father-daughter dance.
• 1:01:09
  Mm-hmm. I mean, you can even do a father-daughter dance, guys, on a second wedding.
• 1:01:13
  It doesn't have to be a first wedding. No, it doesn't matter.
• 1:01:15
  Yeah. The only thing I would spend money on, they highly recommend it,
• 1:01:19
  do not skim on honeymoon.
• 1:01:21
  The honeymoon is important for her, but she loves to travel.
• 1:01:25
  Honeymoon. Honeymoon is important. We actually did honeymoon a week before our
• 1:01:29
  wedding. Oh, that's interesting.
• 1:01:31
  Mm-hmm. Well, not honeymoon. Like, how to get away with a bunch of fun. Pre-wedding vacation.
• 1:01:35
  Pre-wedding vacation. Because our wedding had people come from all over the
• 1:01:39
  world, so we need to spend time with the fam.
• 1:01:42
  Okay. Yeah. So that wasn't really honeymoon. That was just a pre-wedding part.
• 1:01:46
  Yes, a pre-wedding part. Travel.
• 1:01:48
  Yeah. That's why I said, but then by the end of the month, so we did like a whole week honeymoon.
• 1:01:53
  Yeah. I think if you can max your dress out at 500 bucks, you're going to save a fortune too.
• 1:01:58
  Yeah, mine was $500. Yeah, you don't have to spend a lot on a dress,
• 1:02:02
  guys. It's a one-time thing. You're never wearing it again. Yeah, I made my own veils.
• 1:02:06
  And some people say, well, I might wear it again if I ever get divorced.
• 1:02:09
  You're not wearing it in a second wedding. You're not wearing it in a second.
• 1:02:11
  You're not passing it down. No. People, they get yellow over time.
• 1:02:15
  Even if you get them preserved, they tend to not keep as well as people think.
• 1:02:19
  I had mine preserved. It ended up yellowing because someone opened up the baggie,
• 1:02:25
  but that's another thing.
• 1:02:26
  A friend donated right away. Did she?
• 1:02:28
  Just realize it's a one-time thing. Get it cute. It may not even be super comfortable.
• 1:02:32
  You might even itch from it. Don't itch too much because then you're allergic to it. Right.
• 1:02:36
  It's cheap. It doesn't have to be super expensive. Now, if you have to have,
• 1:02:39
  you know, the Vera Wang wedding dress, then that's fine.
• 1:02:42
  But just realize that's going to be the cost of most people's weddings.
• 1:02:45
  A medium-sized or a small wedding can, you know, be $15,000 with a small venue,
• 1:02:50
  like 60 people. That's like a $15,000 wedding.
• 1:02:53
  You can do like a buffet if you want. You don't have to have a caterer.
• 1:02:57
  Or you can have a caterer show up with the food, and then it's a buffet.
• 1:03:00
  It's not plate. Like, mine was plate service.
• 1:03:02
  They would come out and all surround a table, and the plates would be dropped exactly the same time.
• 1:03:08
  Oh, wow. So that's how mine was set up, right? You planned to the team. I did.
• 1:03:13
  I was a little, yeah. This is why I don't know if I could actually hand this over to someone.
• 1:03:18
  Maybe you should plan my 20th anniversary getaway. Oh, honey,
• 1:03:21
  I don't have that much time.
• 1:03:22
  Now you do. I spend a lot of time planning the wedding. Mm-hmm.
• 1:03:26
  And then photography. A lot of times people know photographers.
• 1:03:29
  And with the way digital photography is now, you don't have to have the professional photographer.
• 1:03:34
  You could have a lot of different people send in pictures. They select the best
• 1:03:37
  ones and then you put them together in a book and then have the book printed
• 1:03:40
  if you want. Or you just have an online book.
• 1:03:43
  You don't have to have the big printed book like some people do.
• 1:03:47
  Again, just mix it up. Have it with like some of it done with friends.
• 1:03:50
  Have some of it done with family.
• 1:03:52
  And then if you want like a high-end wedding. Now, some people say a high-end
• 1:03:56
  wedding is over $50,000. I think that's kind of a normal wedding.
• 1:04:00
  Especially if you have over 100 guests. That's kind of a normal wedding.
• 1:04:03
  The vendors cost, the band cost, the DJ cost.
• 1:04:07
  Everything you add in costs. It's just everything. It's like little by little.
• 1:04:11
  The flowers. And by the time you're done, you're like, wow, $50,000 went so quickly.
• 1:04:17
  So quick. And like we said, her niece has probably got a $100,000 wedding right now.
• 1:04:22
  Easy. So you have to make sure that you keep it on budget, you keep it under
• 1:04:26
  control. And here's some quick tips, too.
• 1:04:29
  Put a website together, right? So get a wedding website that people can RSVP
• 1:04:34
  to, but have like a wedding email.
• 1:04:35
  Create a temporary wedding email that people can email just the wedding request.
• 1:04:41
  Because like maybe it's your name last name at gmail
• 1:04:44
  or something like that right because then you're coordinating all
• 1:04:47
  the correspondence in one location and you don't have to worry about all
• 1:04:49
  the extra spam people use excel
• 1:04:52
  spreadsheets to coordinate stuff i love excel i'm an
• 1:04:55
  excel junkie but with all the with all the different wedding
• 1:04:58
  planning sites i do recommend keeping it all in
• 1:05:01
  one place yeah or you're gonna get you're gonna lose
• 1:05:04
  it and then some people also create facebook groups for the wedding they did
• 1:05:09
  that too did they yes the facebook group helps because then people can communicate
• 1:05:13
  with each other and talk to each other and say hey i can help out with this
• 1:05:18
  or hey do you need this or yeah and then read your contracts.
• 1:05:22
  Oh, my God, yes. Because if you have a catering contract and you cancel the
• 1:05:26
  wedding the day before because whatever happens, your bridesmaid goes off with
• 1:05:30
  your husband or who knows what. Not saying that's going to happen.
• 1:05:34
  You're like, not saying that's going to happen. But let's say something does
• 1:05:37
  happen or maybe, you know, a parent gets sick and you have to cancel or even
• 1:05:41
  just move the wedding. Yeah.
• 1:05:43
  You got to make sure that the contract allows for it. You get head price back, I think.
• 1:05:47
  Sometimes but if there's food ordered like if it's
• 1:05:50
  two days in advance a lot of times you get nothing back because
• 1:05:53
  the food's already been purchased yeah that's true if you have any other suggestions
• 1:05:57
  we'd love to hear from you yeah regarding what you've done specifically for
• 1:06:02
  your wedding give us any ideas that you know how things went for you if you
• 1:06:06
  planned your own wedding or if you booked a really good wedding planner that
• 1:06:09
  you recommend feel free to drop it in the comments.
• 1:06:12
  And we'd love to hear from you. Reach out whenever you want. Yeah, anytime.
• 1:06:16
  This is Diva Mia signing off. This is Diva Cat signing off. Talk to you soon. Have a wonderful week.
• 1:06:23
  Thanks for tuning in. Like, subscribe, and drop a comment. We'd love hearing from you.
• 1:06:29
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• 1:06:33
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• 1:06:39
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