Latest / Dits & Dahs / not following the crowd
Transcript
- Sue: Thank you to the couple of YouTube viewers so far that watched my recent posting requesting your participation voluntarily in providing a little affirmation or group of words related or unrelated to each other for me to improvise music. And I've posted one on the Tiny Affirmations playlist and the other on the Osmosis Parations. And as people see that video, I'll be creating more content. What I do on a daily basis is try to create one musical bit and one blog post like this one you're listening to. And to add in the external engagement is a challenge in a good way. It's helping me drive myself to create in a very efficient way. workflow that still delivers passionate, created music. Some of the blog posts that you listen to and some of the tiny affirmations are about valuing yourself and knowing that no matter if you're in a dynamic with others living day to day or whether you are a solo person living, you have total control of what your days are about and that no one should be guiding you except yourself. And I celebrate that. And the music for me is that confirmation, confirmation with a woodpecker confirming my confirmation that I'm adding value to myself by creation. And here's my whole gist of where I'm going. In the context of these playlists and this channel, of course, it's all a YouTube community and you choose to consume the content or you don't. You know, I don't... have need for anything other than the fact that I'm enjoying making the content, putting it up online. If you engage with it, it's really wonderful. And there's no expectation of anything else beyond that. And that's what I love about YouTube is that if nothing else, for as long as the switch is turned on in so many different levels, I've got a repository for all of the things that I utter on a daily basis going through my life. If others listen to it and watch the content and feel that It's engaging or they enjoy it as a bit of entertainment or a change from their routine. Great. I find a lot of YouTube content interesting. But I also believe that my recent life experiences of having lost my dog and my husband within a two week period while I was destitute gave me the blather in my being to express. my experience of going through that in a way that maybe others resonate with it, maybe engage with the emotions that I expressed. And for me, the acknowledgement that you consume the content is that I'm just being seen and heard, and that's fine. As a musician, we all train with the idea, confirmation with the woodpecker, that we're going to be seeking fame and fortune. I totally... respond to that. I grew up in the 60s and the 70s in the United States and was a huge fan of the Beatles and so the fact that they had number one songs just every time they released something it became a number one hit. It seemed to me as a child growing up an extraordinary event but yet obviously these people were doing it so might be a long shot but could happen. So you get to a place as a musician's mindset of making certain that confirmation with my watch that everybody who has an interest or might have an interest has access to listening to your content in whatever media form that takes. Here we are, 2026, confirmation with a woodpecker that all I have to do is upload stuff to YouTube. I'm not interested in monetizing it. If it gets to be monetized and listened to and considered as valuable in other people's lives, that's a bonus. That's just a confirmation that what I'm doing for myself is also positively affecting others in the same filtered way. And I am only trying to resonate with things that I've gone through with the idea that I might be having a solo life, but I'm certainly not alone in the experiences that I'm sharing. So to me, telling sometimes when I recognize a lot of content like mine online, that it might be speaking to how alone people feel. even if they're in a dynamic living day-to-day with others around them, confirmation with a wood bur. And I'll just reaffirm, it's all about understanding that you exist as yourself unto yourself, even in relationships with others, whether they be professional or friendly or families or a combination of those three. Whatever interaction you have with other humans in your life, you still stand alone, but you're not lonely. You've got the other people around you. And they don't even have to fit in the same exact buckets emotionally and spiritually as you. Because in the end, we're all equal. We just have little nano-customizations that help us identify one from another, because otherwise, it'd be looking like in the mirror all the time. And I'm good to look at, but I like to see other faces too. And today, with algorithms such as YouTube, for example, you get feeling as though you're in an echo chamber pretty easily because... What I've learned is that when I write some of the descriptions for the content that I create, those words will show up in such a way that when I go to refresh my personal viewing YouTube feed, those keywords have found their way into algorithms. That's okay, but it's the use of the word that is out of context. And so therefore it tells me that without too much effort, we can all allow ourselves to sink into not thinking and being aware. of what's being presented to us media-wise. That accentuates the likelihood that we will feel emotionally isolated and lonely. You don't want that, do you? Confirmation with a woodpecker. You want to feel connected. That's why you're engaging with others. It's the understanding that within, since we're all equal, The universe is in us and we're in it, meaning that each of our three realms have to be in balance. And so once you begin to understand the importance of standing on your own and believing your own beliefs and trusting yourself and having no fear and no doubt and just, you're not trying to change the world to bend to your way of thinking. All you are doing is taking it all in like the cosmic. sponge you are and letting most of it all filter through you in a way that is non-reactive. But you're aware of it because you're common sense. Your intuition tells you that you are the only one in control to value that, to never lose control of that. Have the awareness that if temporarily that happens, you return to balance. Staying out of control, that's not healthy for any of your realms. But that you will have the wherewithal to recognize that and determine, yeah, Need to go see a professional? Need to do X? Need to do Y? Et cetera. Just close with a little allegory of my late husband. He was, like myself, born a musician and chose to join the Royal Welsh Fusiliers at the time there were British Army troops in Northern Ireland during the Troubles, as you can Google. And as a musician, they trained them also to be medics. And so he stitched up a lot of soldiers. He was actually a junior soldier. He wasn't even 18 having these very heavy experiences, I think anyway. It affected him so much that during the end of his life and combined with other life events in his family, he chose not to seek out medical attention when he needed it most. He had lost control a long time ago. He chose to languish without medical attention for nearly three years before his death. His mindset had changed to one that said, I'm getting off the bus and if that's the way I get to go off to get off the bus of life, then this is the way I'm going no matter what length of time it's going to take. It's not about me having saved him or even trying to, but it is about the understanding that there are times in life when you make decisions that may be filtered through a layer of negative energy that been lurking around you, whether it be a fear of going against your training. How does that happen? Well, that happens because somebody or something convinced you to not be you. In other words, whatever the mental health issues he may have suffered, because he was also an alcoholic, he allowed that to happen. That's not to say blame. That's not to be judging or anything. It's the understanding that how easily each one of us can lose control and that at the time that we lose control, we may make a decision. that impacts us greatly going forward in our lives. Anyway, could be good, could be bad. Point I'm making with regard to the bad decisions is that it got to be so pervasive in his life. He chose not to make a change and he was not alone. He was with me. But yet that's a space that I couldn't trespass into. I was the human soul that supported him. on his journey. Never mind the fact that I was asking him each and every day that when he was complaining, did he want to finally get to a doctor or can we go to the emergency room or all of that. The idea that you feel so socially isolated when you're surrounded with other human beings is an opportunity to turn within. And I know that probably sounds aspirational. That's the place to start. If you have air in your lungs, I believe you also have hope. You might need to, as I did at one point, sit myself down for a few days staring out into the woods or some beautiful scene that is inspirational to you and just let your thoughts wander because you're that cosmic sponge like I am. Everything in the universe is flowing through you. What if it's going to attract you and what are you going to hold on to and build with? And realistically, how's that going to work in this real world? I had to piece things together one little chunk by chunk. And all I can say now four and some months into it is that I have a much greater appreciation for not taking it for granted. That is earning an income, living graciously every day. But that because it's happening now, I'm very grateful. It's really about understanding at some point that you control you. You have to entertain yourself, fill your brain with the fun stuff and start as meagerly as you feel that you need to do and be open to it. You don't need to follow anybody, you don't need to replicate anybody, you just have to understand that you find yourself first. Sometimes life provides situations that take away all the material goods so that you have nothing else but to focus on yourself. Wherever that's at, you are enough for you because you control you. Everybody sees that and they control themselves and you see that they control themselves and having a good time or at least doing our best. So thank you for listening. hope you find yourself in a very calm and peaceful place. I'll be there. See you later. Thanks for listening.