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Episode 49: The Secret Habit to live to 100 years old · The Habit Lab

• 1:08
  Speaker 1: We all have areas in our life we might feel stuck or overwhelmed.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: So join me, jenna Zint, habit Coach, teacher and follower of Jesus, as we go after little bits of better by building offensively small habits that create big impact.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: This is the Habit Lab Podcast.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Hello, welcome to the Habit Lab.
• 1:33
  Speaker 1: I am Jenna Marizent and I'm really excited about this episode.
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: I usually write like half a page of notes, but I definitely took like two or three pages to prep for this one.
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: But yeah, so this episode we're going to dive in the secret to living to 100, unlocking the habits of the world'sest Living People.
• 1:53
  Speaker 1: That's a big claim, huh.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: Well, the good news is I did a lot of heavy research, and by heavy research I mean I watched a Netflix series.
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: Aren't we all experts from the docu-series that we have access to nowadays?
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: No, I'm kidding, but actually it was cool.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: I watched it with my kids kind of slowly.
• 2:12
  Speaker 1: I think it's like five series.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: It's called Live to 100, the Secrets of the Blue Zone, and it's by this guy named Dan.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: I don't actually know how to say his last name.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: My friend, casey Cunliffe, recommended it.
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: Shout out to Casey, she's a faithful listener, so I'm sure she's going to hear that.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Text me, girl, when you get this.
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: Text me.
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: Anyways, dan went on a tour of these pocket, these little blue zones, that's what they call them, when there's a higher than normal concentration of people who live to be over 100.
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: And there's these amazing little pockets around the world and he went and kind of like interviewed, stayed for a while in the town to actually just get a pulse of, like, what are they doing?
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Like, what are the secret?
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: What are their habits?
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Is there a common thread?
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: And it was interesting.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: There was a few common threads, but one of the things that really hit me while I was watching this, like it was one of those moments, you know, you're just, it was a Netflix and chill afternoon because I was real tired and Wesley was like this is boring and the girls were kind of interested, but I'm like this is what we're doing.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: So I was watching it not in a super spiritual mood, but when he said the first time he said this line about one of the common habits or lifestyles, like the commonalities of all these regions, because they're in the US, they're in Italy, they're in Greece, they're in Costa Rica, they're in Japan was this One of the common habits?
• 3:32
  Speaker 1: Is that they all had pockets of resistance in them.
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: Some part of their life or life in their town required daily interaction with resistance.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: It was built into the infrastructure of their life.
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: I was just like because obviously there's so many biblical references and tie-ins of like the idea that resistance actually leads to longevity, but to see it I love seeing like data back up like biblical principles or scriptures and this was just such a tangible example.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: But one of the things is that all of these villages have real everyday obstacles in their lives that build up the population's strength and resilience Like it's a natural gym.
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: Most of them, I think there's one pocket that maybe went to a gym, but most of them it was just their lifestyle.
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: Like, for instance, in Italy, that little town there the locals, the whole terrain of their city was hilly, it was uphill.
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: So while he's doing this interview, he's walking with all these 80, 90, 100-year-old people up these hills and it's just their normal life to get their groceries or to go visit or go to church.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: The resistance that is built into their life actually has increased their endurance and naturally kept them active in a way that has made them like have this longevity, like it's built resilience in them and I was like what?
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: And even just watching these people when they were in Costa Rica, when they were interviewing some of the people, one of the guys was 100 years old and he literally looks 70.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: He was a cowboy Like.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: This opening shot is when he's like roping his cattle and using a machete to, like you know, clear the land and I was like, oh my gosh.
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: And then in Japan, most of the people they didn't have they didn't furniture, they didn't have a ton of furniture.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: So they actually sat on the floor.
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: So they were talking about the core strength needed for these old folks to get up on up and down so often in their life.
• 5:29
  Speaker 1: It's just part of their life.
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: And then there was another town in Greece where they kept super active because they all farm and gardened all the time.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: So it was like they didn't live off of.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: It wasn't like when you think farm, I think sometimes like our homesteading trend here in the US, that's not it.
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: They all had like these real small patches that they'd farm, but because they'd squat and they'd take a little bit of resistance and like whatever they were doing, it was just low level.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: It actually helped their health immensely, like all these populations had way less medication, all the crazy stats about, like, the decreased levels of diseases and he was just kept coming back to that, the resistance was the key.
• 6:07
  Speaker 1: The secret, their secret habit, like a habit of daily facing obstacles, has built a resilience that has equaled longevity.
• 6:16
  Speaker 1: And that reminds me of that scripture.
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: Where is it?
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: It's, I wrote it down somewhere the Ephesians 5, 3,.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Suffering produces perseverance.
• 6:24
  Speaker 1: Perseverance, character, character, hope.
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, and there's like that's one version.
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: I wish I'd gotten the version that talks about strength, you know.
• 6:33
  Speaker 1: But I'm like, oh, my gosh, this is that scripture in action.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: I was like blowing my mind.
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: I was like this is evidence, this is evidence of all of this.
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: And the cool part is that all of these parts of their lives that maybe we would think of inconvenience or outsiders, it actually they didn't.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: He would ask them about them and they were like, yeah, it's just what we do.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: And some of them actually found that it gives them purpose and they're proud that they're this old and can do all these things still.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: So it's just this rock solid dose of resilience that was the common thread through all of these different populations.
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: And it's interesting because it's like, okay.
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: So then what's the takeaway?
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: Embracing these daily challenges, the people in the blue zones were actually building physical strength, but also mental resilience.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: They talked about some of the origin stories of some of these little villages, like the one in Japan was really devastated by the effects of World War II, and then the one in Italy, I think, was like the reason they were on this hilly terrain is they kept getting kicked out of their land.
• 7:32
  Speaker 1: So this idea of they had to like they part.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: They highlighted some of the stories of when they were rebuilding our community.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: It was like they were on.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: They had this choice.
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: It's almost like a choose your ending.
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: When the resistance came, they could either be a victim to it or decide to embrace it, and then that's where their resilience and longevity was actually found.
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh my gosh, what Like?
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: It's not just physical resilience, there's mental resilience too, like these little frictions we can think of, an annoyance actually was like a powerful recipe for like a long, thriving life.
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: And I literally like thought about this so much.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: That's why I'm doing the podcast.
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my gosh, this could preach, this is so good.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: And I was just instantly, I think, about the contrast to in America where we spend so much time and effort trying to pad our lives with comfort.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: And I've been thinking about this for a while just because we've been in a season like when my business shut down and then, financially, we were in a really hard spot.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: And then the Lord built Habit Lab.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: Actually, as I'm saying this, I just remembered when I so obviously Habit Lab was my second business.
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: My first business I had was Etsy shop called Turbans for Tots and I had it for eight years, but that was actually built because I had worked for Jesus Culture.
• 8:45
  Speaker 1: I was, if you guys know that, the music label and the church Jesus Culture.
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: I was banning Leipshire, who's the head pastor, ceo, whatever you want to call him.
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: I was his assistant for quite a few years and then we decided to get.
• 8:58
  Speaker 1: You know, aaron and I were like we're ready to have our first kids.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: We got pregnant and then they announced that they were moving after we had gotten pregnant and it was like one of the reasons we decided to get pregnant was because our job was lined up.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: You know, I was actually super mad at Banning when he said that.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: When he announced that they were moving, I was like I felt betrayed because it was like I'm not safe, this is so hard.
• 9:21
  Speaker 1: I'm already pregnant and they were going to be moving one month before I was due, or right around my due date actually.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: But then the beautiful part of the point of this is that that's out of necessity and out of the hard times.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: So I got another little job for a bit for a few months, but that's actually when I started hustling and Turbans for Tots was built out of that.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: And it's so funny because the eight years that Turbans was up and running I was so aware that the hard, the uncomfortable part of my life made me persevere and dig deeper in a way that actually birthed all this beautiful fruit in my life.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: And then the same is true I'm trying to draw this contrast with Habit Lab when turbines after eight years was dramatically less and had decreased in sales.
• 9:59
  Speaker 1: Then in doing that that's one of the reasons I turned to Habit Lab, like turned to Habit and was trying to modify some of the behaviors that I thought in myself, some of the weaknesses that had led me to my business failing.
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: So when that was happening, my interest in like enthusiasm for that I first started with Habit Lab.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: I don't know if I've ever told you guys this, but with a book club, after I read a few of the books I was like, okay, I made it and I had like friends probably like eight friends commit to six weeks of just me doing a free book club.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: We actually did it at six in the morning on a Sunday.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: They're good friends and from that.
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: And then I took the summer off I did it with them and then I built my habit mastery course in the fall, like from that.
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: So just seeing the same correlation of pain and something that was like really hard and challenging when I, like the Lord, built something so beautiful, it was so fruitful in that, and I'm like, oh, wow, I can actually see this evidence in my own life.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: And the interesting thing about right now is that Habit Lab.
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: When we sold the business, we had a good chunk of money from the sale and then we ended up owing because of some what are they called, I forget Refunds during COVID for the business.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: We then got hit with the tax bill that we weren't aware of from the whatever the paperwork.
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: Afterwards it was a real confusing, delayed thing and it was like so much money and it took.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: It was multiple bills and it took a good chunk of the profit from our business.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: So we had a season of probably like eight months where we were doing great financially and now we're kind of in the like okay, we are on a very strict budget.
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: But the interesting part of it for me, which is just kind of shifted in my mindset of looking at resistance as not an annoyance, like actually those seasons where I'm uncomfortable are the ones that one make me rely on the Lord so much more, like they're the easiest seasons for intimacy because my need is so high.
• 11:57
  Speaker 1: But then, two, they always form something so beautiful, like I actually.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: I remember one time when I was bemoaning how difficult some of the transition was, when our turbines for Tuts was shutting down, the Lord was like I was like I just wanted to end, I want it to be done.
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: And the Lord was like what did he say?
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: He said I think you've got it backwards Cause I was like I just want to be comfortable again, I just don't want to be in this stress or this tension, I don't want to live suffering anymore.
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: And the Lord was like you've got it backwards, though.
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: You're wanting a season of comfort.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: But what if I actually in comfort.
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: In the seasons where it's comfortable, you are the least motivated to turn to me and you actually get apathetic in a way that is way more dangerous than when you're slightly uncomfortable.
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: Like your reliance on me is so much greater.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: Like what if you've got it backwards where my favorite seasons with you are not the seasons where you're comfortable but the ones when you're uncomfortable, because that's when you're the softest heart and I was like, oh so it really.
• 12:57
  Speaker 1: It's one of the reasons I want to do this.
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: Episode is like the concept from this Netflix series has just really kind of encapsulated a lesson that the Lord has been like.
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: Slowly working as I mature, sometimes you ever feel like this big Christian principle that you've been hearing sermons on your whole life or people talk about clicks and you're like, oh okay, so suffering's part of the deal.
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: And then also one of my friends shout out to Stacey was doing some deep dive into what suffering means in the original different parts that she had been reading in the Bible.
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: She's like, what does the Greek version or Hebrew word actually mean that was used here?
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: And the interesting part is it's so much less intense than what our modern day version of suffering.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: I think, if I could oversimplify it, it was like to affect, to have an effect, a footprint, a cause, a little bit of a weight, or a weight Again, those are generous words, so not a theologian over here, stacey, if I butchered it, my apologies, but anyways, it was just so much lighter than what I think of suffering.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: And then so to tie it with like suffering is never for nothing, like actually, it forms something so beautiful in this, these pockets of people who, living to like long, healthy lives, have actually embraced that as one of their habits to help them thrive.
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: So what if actually suffering, if we re, if it's a like, you know, take away our American Western definition of it is actually a gift.
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: That is like, when, seen as a gift, you get the benefits that can actually lead to fruit, longevity, resilience, character building, all this.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, this is the scriptures you were talking about.
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: Huh, god, this is what you meant.
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: I understand it.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: Now.
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel like he has to break it down to like, you know, when you describe something to like preschoolers with like action figures to get the concept, I'm like, oh, I got it now.
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: So, anyways, just this contrast between these blue zones of how they live versus this American.
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: I honestly feel like it's an obsession with padding our lives with comfort.
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: What if it's actually counterproductive to our well-being?
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: In America we do everything to make life easier more comfortable, door dash on demand, everything's electronic chairs that recline, you know, like different types of beds.
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: What if all of our padding and pursuit of comfort were actually doing ourselves a disservice?
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: I'm going to say it again what if our obsession and pursuit of comfort is actually doing ourselves a disservice?
• 15:28
  Speaker 1: And literally the evidence is found.
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: When they compared the rates of these blue zones compared to American, it was like, oh, comfort's not doing for us what we think it's doing.
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: It's actually counterproductive.
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I think we're on these like quest to avoid any and all discomfort.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: Yet, like I said, those blue zone folks are showing us that facing a little bit, a little daily resistance, actually is the secret sauce for well-being.
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: Instead of running from obstacles, they embrace them and it's literally adding years to their life.
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: So what if you change your perspective?
• 16:08
  Speaker 1: This is what I feel like the Lord has told me.
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: So when I say you imagine God giving me some good truth, slaps on the walk, on all my walks.
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: So what if you changed your perspective on your daily resistance and struggle areas and embrace them, could that actually literally add years to your life?
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's worth rethinking comfort altogether.
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: What if true wellbeing is built from leaning into friction instead of smoothing it all away?
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: Right, okay?
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: So if we can think of reform, how we experience our daily discomforts or suffering or thorns in your flesh I think thorn in your flesh could be a hard relationship in your family, or job stuff, or children things, or marital you know like we hear Paul talk about it in the New Testament, but I kind of think like what if he actually is grateful for it?
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: He asked for it to be taken, but then he's grateful for it because he knows it's forming him.
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like, do we have the same perspective with our own thorns and flesh?
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: So I think I was going to give you a little insight into where I think most of me.
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: How about this?
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: Where I've noticed I miss it and don't embrace the heart, the obstacles, don't take the resistance as helpful.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: I don't see it as a benefit, I see it as a hindrance.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: I'm annoyed by it.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: I give a lot of my effort to making it go away.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: What is it that stops me?
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: And I realize so much.
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: For me, it's usually a victim mentality to it.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: When I view the challenges as meaningless or unfair, it's easy for me to slip into discouragement or hopelessness and that is actually what almost trips me up from going down the path of embracing the discomfort, the suffering, the resistance as a benefit.
• 18:00
  Speaker 1: Like it stops me.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: It's almost like the roadblock to the path where you get to experience the fruit from.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: It is the victim mentality.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: So if I feel like defeated by it, I don't get access to the fruit, if that makes sense.
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: So some of the things that I noticed I wrote a list of the things that I say like patterns, thought patterns in my brain, thought habits that usually are indicative to me.
• 18:23
  Speaker 1: I have a victim mentality with some hard part about my life, so I think I wrote down 10.
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: Why does this always happen to me?
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: Usually that means that I'm feeling singled out and it feels like unfair.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: The quantity that's aimed at me.
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: Number two if only my circumstances were different, then I could be happy Believing and the problem with that is believing that external changes are the only way to improve your life and not actually owning your internal world.
• 18:53
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes we'll call them, if, then statements.
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: So that's when I know I'm being powerless and being a victim.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: If only blank was different, if only such and such or so, and so someone's name were different, then our marriage would be happy.
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: Or I could be happy in our marriage, whatever.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: If only Aaron would change, then I could be happy.
• 19:11
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh yeah, that's a victim mindset and that actually stops me.
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: That's my roadblock, that I'm not going to benefit and get the fruit of this hard thing because I'm getting tripped up at the entrance.
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: Another one is I'll never it'll, I'll never catch a break, or it's kind of like forever, it's catastrophizing, like I'll.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm like it's always going to happen.
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: Or I'm like right now, audrey has a sickness I won't go into details and it's like it just feels like it's always something.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: And I noticed that this morning.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: I'm like okay, also, what else is true?
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: We will hardly miss school.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: Last year, last fall, we hardly got sick with anything.
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: So like actually reframing.
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: When I catch myself doing that like skewed victim perspective, trying to be like what else is true?
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: And I correct, collect actual evidence that prove the always never catch a break.
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: This is, this happens to us so much.
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: Um, I think too that like I'll never catch a break or it'll never be easier is is having that mindset that these problems are permanent and inevitable, which is hopelessness.
• 20:09
  Speaker 1: I'm like, ooh, a lot of victim mentality of my thoughts sound hopeless, so that's another clue.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: Maybe you don't resonate with the actual lines that I'm sharing, but noticing chronic hopelessness, bitterness or offense, I'm like, oh, victim mentality is actually that literal roadblock from stopping me down the path where the obstacle actually I get benefit and the fruit, I get the reward of the resistance.
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: When I get tripped, I miss that.
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: When I get tripped up by these victim mindsets, I'll go quicker.
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: Sorry, I keep going back to the point because I'm like, oh my gosh, jenna, please, please get this.
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: Number four everyone else has it so much easier than I do, comparing your struggles to everyone else and feeling like you're worse off.
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: Number five what's the point of trying?
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: Nothing ever changes.
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: That's powerless, that's hopeless.
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: Number six I shouldn't have to deal with this, believing that certain challenges are unfair or I should somehow be exempt from it.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: Number seven other people are the reason I'm stuck.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: That would be like blame narratives pointing the finger, looking at them as the reason they are the reason I'm stuck.
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: That would be like blame narratives, pointing the finger, looking at them as the reason they are the obstacle from your happiness.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Number eight I'd be happy if they would stop making things hard for me.
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: Oh goodness, sometimes I think about my kids.
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: How often I get a victim mindset in parenthood.
• 23:14
  Speaker 1: I'd say that probably is where it pops up the most for me currently in this season, and realizing like, okay, what does it look like to be powerful?
• 23:23
  Speaker 1: How do I change this narrative so that I actually can benefit?
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: If the resistance is still going to be there, let's pretend child number one, two and three are resistance number one, two and three.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: If they're going to keep eating my life, I actually want to experience the benefit that I get in this path in the next, like 18 years.
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: So I need to change my mindset.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: That victimhood doesn't thwart me from getting on that path where the fruit is, let's see.
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: I'll do the bare minimum.
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: It doesn't matter anyways.
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: So feeling defeated before you start thinking your efforts are pointless Again, that'd be hopelessness.
• 23:58
  Speaker 1: This is just my lot, my luck.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: Nothing I do will ever change.
• 24:09
  Speaker 1: Viewing yourself or your marriage or your job or your finances as permanently stuck or doomed Again hopelessness.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: So if you resonate with any of those, no problem.
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: I think literally the first step in breaking thought habits isness.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: So if you resonate with any of those, no problem.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: I think literally the first step in breaking thought habits is awareness.
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: So noticing if any of those pop up like, oh actually, whatever this is, is a real obstacle.
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: There's actually truly resistance from this area.
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: But when I have my lens of victimhood on, I'm actually cheating myself because I'm not going to have access to the fruit.
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: On the other end, if I lean in to the benefit in this, so I'll get next to what my little habit is to help myself.
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: Once I notice awareness of like, oop, I'm being a victim or oops, I'm bemoaning the hard thing and before I get to changing my perspective, one of the things that I think about, because sometimes people I feel like you probably can relate, I don't feel I'm like I catch that I'm being a victim, like by one of those phrases and I flagged it, but I think, like I almost feel like I don't have enough energy to do something about it, to go grow, to work.
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: But then one of the things I remember, at one point with the Lord I was like, but it's true, and it is this hard and it is tiring and I am exhausted, but what I realized for me?
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: Just the perspective shift from the Lord.
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: He's like oh, it's so true, energy in this season is precious.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Literally every ounce counts.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: But the truth is, when you spend your energy being a victim, it's like a hole in your bucket and it actually is draining like the most valuable asset.
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: You have your energy, your mood, your whatever perspective.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: So you don't have what was it Like?
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: You don't have the.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: I can't think of it.
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: You can't afford.
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: That's what I want to say.
• 25:54
  Speaker 1: You can't afford to not plug this hole like this victim mindset.
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: Yes, you're exhausted, that's all true, but any of the victim mindset, it's like another hole in your bucket where I actually need to do the effort to plug it, which usually it's super simple to change my thought pattern so that I can conserve the energy, to give it to what it is costing me, what the season is costing me.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: So I think of it like burning fuel for no reason, wasting energy, victim mindset.
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: So it's like I'm actually I can't afford to not go after the victim mindset, even when I feel tired and exhausted, because it's actually going to rob for me every ounce that I need to face this like well, yeah.
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: So I think, going back to the scripture of, like Romans, 5.3, the suffering produces perseverance, and then perseverance, character and character, hope, realizing that, like every stage in the process, builds resistance, resilience, and that is the key to longevity.
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: If you think about the blue regions, and then too, sometimes I remember when Paul, you know that scripture, I think, sometimes I think I realized that my perspective on resistance or hardship, or suffering, if you want to call it that, got skewed because I had it drilled into me, which, again, I don't think anyone did it on purpose.
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: It's more of like what my little self took away from the Christian expression of we're more than overcomers.
• 27:12
  Speaker 1: We can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: My interpretation of that that I heard was these shouldn't happen to me.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: Overcoming equaled not having hard things or, with hard things happening, pray and God takes them from you or changes them dramatically.
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: But when I went into the verse, when I think about, I think we're reading.
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: I've told you that we're reading the Bible slowly.
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: There's a group of us, actually there's a couple groups that I coordinated to do a Bible habit this year and there's a private Facebook group that we did.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: That's probably about, I think it's like two 300 people that are doing it in the year, which is amazing.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: But I'm really excited because next year I'm going to upgrade, I want to be a little more intentional, I want to add some scripture memorizing and then I want to do a monthly call to talk about what we're doing.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: So I'm actually going to build a membership for the Bible Habit next year because it'll be reasonably priced, for sure, a monthly membership.
• 28:14
  Speaker 1: But I actually just want to go after more in that area.
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: I want to upgrade it, and I know community and accountability not only keeps me or community not only keeps me accountable, but it makes it more interesting hearing other people's perspective.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: So, anyways, keep that coming.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: But so we're reading Paul's letters and we actually came to this scripture about the overcomer.
• 28:34
  Speaker 1: I don't think this is the same translation that I was reading it, but it was like I've learned to be content in whatever circumstance and I've learned the secret to being content, and it was like overcoming in every situation.
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: And he was talking about like it being through Christ, which I knew.
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: But what I didn't think about is how long, when I was wrongly assigning over Christians, are overcoming, meaning the pain or obstacle gets removed.
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: That was how I defined overcoming.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: God took it away, realizing that he was literally in jail.
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: He had been in jail, he kept being in jail.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my gosh, this is not what he meant.
• 29:10
  Speaker 1: Paul did not mean overcoming equals no more pain or obstacles or hardships or suffering.
• 29:15
  Speaker 1: He was like overcoming was a perspective shift, while you were in it still and your hope was not in the obstacle or heart, his hope wasn't in it being removed.
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: He actually was like I remember at one point he's like, yeah, I wish I could go, but I know this is serving a purpose.
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: Like, so I'm okay until the Lord wants me.
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: My life is his and I'm like that just blew my mind.
• 29:35
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I've been wrongly assigning my view of suffering or even the conflict, tying it into this episode of, like, resistance, building resilience, anything that's been an obstacle or hardship or suffering.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: I've looked at it, overcoming it or being content would be the Lord removing it.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, that's the opposite Opposite.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: Actually, overcoming is in the middle of it, changing your perspective and looking at the benefit of what it's forming.
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: So the basics of this for me, my little personal habit once I that I've been on this walk to like change my perspective on it was that when I first notice it, what's been hard?
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: And then I usually notice, like I said, a little bit of some victim mindset happening, and then I go after getting curious and I'm like, oh okay, yeah, this is a reoccurring pattern.
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this is daily resistance.
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, this is creating a bit of a struggle.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: Yep, this is, there's some suffering, and if we go back to Stacy's definition, it has having an impact on my life, that is true.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: So I'm like where I'm curious.
• 30:39
  Speaker 1: But then the next for me, what had been going on is I'm like I'll pray, like, hey Lord, if this, if you could take the and my kind of, reminds me of the prayer that Jesus prayed in the garden before you know, the night before the cross.
• 30:51
  Speaker 1: He was like, if you can take this from me, awesome.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: If not, your will, my will, not my will.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: Like you're sovereign.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: I'm not.
• 31:03
  Speaker 1: I don't get it.
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: I don't actually see from your perspective.
• 31:05
  Speaker 1: I have a really limited brain, like a small peanut sized brain, and you kind of made all the brains combined times 10 and even then more.
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: So I actually for sure trust that you have a different perspective and understand how this is working.
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: So I'd like it to be gone.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: But if that is actually not what's going to benefit me the most long term, I'm cool.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying this is what Jesus is saying, this is what Genesis is.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: I'm cool with actually like, can you change my perspective on it so I could see it like you do?
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: So if you could take it away?
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: If not, and I don't actually understand how it's working together for my good or benefiting me, can you actually clue me into that?
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: That way, I use that Whenever when I ask him like how is this working for my good?
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: I use that information to combat when it becomes hard again or the victim mindset creeps in about the resistance.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: You know the soreness, thinking about those old folks walking up the hills all day.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: When I start to bemoan it or feel annoyed by the inconvenience and the resistance, you know my calves are burning, my thighs are burning.
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: Metaphorically, I'm like oh yeah, can you remind me how this is benefiting me?
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: My simple habit for this, when I'm trying to turn from bemoaning obstacles or suffering to actually partnering them, knowing that there's a benefit to resistance.
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: That little question.
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: For me, it shifted from stop it, take it away, remove the pain to.
• 32:19
  Speaker 1: Can you show me what this is forming in me, because that has helped me so much more to change my perspective, like, actually I can find hope here if I can see how you're using this for good.
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: What I'm not asking is when it ends, or explain it to me or justify it, but if you can explain, my simple question is what is it forming in me?
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: So, thinking about forming, like when you do I've done some like work with a personal trainer and when they get you to do weird exercises, I will ask like, hey, what muscle group is this working?
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: And when they tell me it, I'm like okay, so I have vision and purpose, even though it feels weird or I would not have thought to do it this way, because I don't know, I'm not the expert.
• 33:03
  Speaker 1: I feel like that's what that question evokes for me.
• 33:06
  Speaker 1: When I ask, when there's a hard part of my life, when I'm experiencing some suffering and I've prayed, asked for it to go, but it doesn't, then I'm like okay, so if much more vision for staying here and looking at the benefit this resistance can bring me, versus bemoaning.
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: It's like you're going to get resistance.
• 33:32
  Speaker 1: Are you going to bemoan it or notice the benefit.
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: So for me, my little habit is, after I notice awareness of a resistance, I'm like okay.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: And then I asked for, I'm like if you could take it from me, take this cup from me.
• 33:42
  Speaker 1: Okay, cool, it's not coming, it's still here.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: Then I switched to okay, show me what it's forming in me.
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: And it's cool because, um, oh sorry, isn't it funny.
• 33:53
  Speaker 1: I prayed that the Holy spirit would come before the episode, but then sometimes, when I experience it and it still surprises me.
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: So my current testimony like I said, our finances were awesome.
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: After we got, we sold the business, but then tax bills and a few other things and then living off of it because Habit Lab was not up and running.
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: Now we're in a pretty tight season again and we have been for probably like eight or nine months and I for a while was like Jesus, make this, launch the ticket out, make that product sell so big that that is our.
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: On some level I wouldn't have said this, but that was our savior Like that's my solution for the pain of finances.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: And at some point I don't know I started processing the word when it wasn't like this launch of my habit lab was like my lowest one financially that I've had in a couple of years, and I felt really discouraged at first.
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: But I was like, okay, I prayed, I did those things and then I'm getting different results in my prayer.
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: So I think I did the take this cup for me and it isn't.
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: So then actually I need to start asking what he is doing and forming in me instead of praying that prayer, cause that's not what it seems like he's doing right now.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: And then he just showed us how, like he showed me personally, like how when we did get that cash of windfall, it didn't actually change my relationship, my mindsets, some of my habits with money.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: And I feel this awareness like I think Aaron and I are called to be good stewards with money, for generosity, to build things to.
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I just feel I do feel like that's true, for identity.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: So I think, in the congruency of where we're at versus what I feel like we're called to be like, I'm like, okay, what's the difference?
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: And I've I've just felt so strongly that the Lord is like I actually am not interested, like a, what you're asking as a solution is not actually the answer.
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: It would be a quick fix, but can you see how you got that quick fix last year or two years ago and it didn't actually solve the internal problem.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: It reminds me of how the people with the lottery there's like that crazy statistic that when people win the lottery, they end up just as poor or poorer a few years after the fact, because it actually doesn't fix the internal systems that are broken that have probably led them to the lifestyle they were experiencing before.
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: It's like an external fix that doesn't last if we don't shift the internal world too.
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: So, anyways, now my prayer has changed, since it was like, you know, take this cup from me.
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: And then it wasn't happening that way.
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: And then I'm like, okay, tell me why or what are you forming in me?
• 36:27
  Speaker 1: And I just saw this shift.
• 36:28
  Speaker 1: So now, when things have been tight, like there's just been different points, you know, in the last like five or six months, I feel like I've totally changed my perspective, where now my prayer is like oh Jesus, please don't let us move from this season to the next.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: Don't bring the money.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: Don't bring whatever the upgrade, the big sales, whatever that will be or you could be creative, it could be some other way Don't bring the money until my internal system has actually my internal world, my character here could carry what you're going to pour out, because I feel the awareness of the responsibility if I mishandle the more, and I don't want that.
• 37:06
  Speaker 1: Yet and I feel so aware, like, wherever you're at, wherever the like man, I've been praying for this area of my life, this area of suffering, this area that's been resistant or was you know like, and I haven't seen the breakthrough.
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: I would love to invite you to ask the Lord to change your question, your conversation with him, and ask him like hey, okay, this hasn't just gone away, so there's some strategy.
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying it's the Lord's will, for the record, I would not get into that murky theological world.
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: But I'm like can you actually show me what I do believe is that the Lord can use all things for good, whether or not they're there by his design?
• 37:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, that is a very true promise that I can like, sink my teeth in, like you can redeem, like you are the redeemer.
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: So can you show me what this could form in me so that I can actually lean in and benefit from the resistance, rather than stay a victim and bemoan and miss out the benefit?
• 38:00
  Speaker 1: It's just crazy to me that that mindset shift is the difference of being like crushed by it or letting it form a muscle in you.
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: So that's the main takeaway from the Blue Zone and the Netflix series is that I'd love for you to go on this journey.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: When you experience resistance in your daily life or that area that's like the thorn in your flesh or you would say you're suffering over here, it's just hard.
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: If you've prayed the prayer for it to change or shift or break through instantly, and it hadn't, would you start asking a different question?
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: Would you ask, like, hey, lord, what I know to be true about your redemption plan is you can use all things.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: So can you show me what this is forming in me?
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: Because I 100% want to get behind what it's forming.
• 38:42
  Speaker 1: And now it's just shifted my perspective of like, oh like.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: I actually feel grateful for this lesson season we're in with finances, cause I'm like I know it's something, it's forming something essential for my next season and I do not want to shortcut it.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: I'm not looking for comfort, because that is actually a quick fix that doesn't last, and I want to get the benefit of the resistance.
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: If I'm going to show up every day and experience the resistance, give me the muscle I want, the bicep.
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: That shows I've been doing the weights here, you know.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: So, anyways, I just hope that that changes your perspective to new habit of like when you're experiencing some struggles, shifting your prayer from what are you forming in me so that you avoid victimhood, that you recognize growth as an opportunity, like there are challenges or chances for growth, you find purpose in it.
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: And then two, the last thing I was going to say is that, if this is helpful at all for you, one of the reasons, one of the ways that I'm able to do this better, is that every season, like four times a year, I sit down with the Lord and kind of ask and spend a little time asking what the purpose of my season is, so then I can align my habits to it.
• 39:48
  Speaker 1: So then, when it's hard in a month or two, at first it feels awesome and cute, but a month or two in where am I experiencing some of the resistance of the season?
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: I could give up or feel like a victim to it.
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: But then I go back and I strengthen myself by reminding myself of the purpose.
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: And that's actually why I built my Habit Reboot mini course is to help other people do this, because I found it so essential with not getting stuck in victimhood from the hard parts of every season, because I can see how they play into the bigger theme.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: And then I'm like, oh, I know that that's part of what's being formed in me in this season, so give me the grace.
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: If it's helping form something in me, there also has to be equal measure grace for it.
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: And I'm interested in being one of those people in the blue zone, one of those grandmas that rides horses still and makes tortillas, and or the Japanese grandmas that are doing their dances and playing games and gardening.
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I actually want to benefit from resistance, not bemoan it.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: And my little habit is just show me what you're forming in me, because then I can have eyes and vision for what it's forming in me.
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: So if you want to grab that mini course that can help you to at least just get vision for this seasonally, but if nothing else, please walk away with that habit of the secret to longevity, the secret from the blue zone, the secret to living to 100 years old, which is like unlocking the habit, is finding strength and resistance, finding strength in the obstacles, finding strength in the stuck parts or the suffering in your life, because, if you do, it could form something so beautiful in you that you're going to benefit from for a long time if you partner with it versus resist it.
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: Okay, I just bless you to go on a journey with the Lord.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: I bless you to ask the question in those areas where you have felt stuck or frustrated with the Lord or forgotten or bitter or felt like a victim.
• 41:42
  Speaker 1: I just break that off of you and I bless you to go on a journey of asking the Lord what is this forming in me?
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: Show me how you're redeeming this, that you're making something.
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: I think of it all the time as like gold, the pressure and fire of diamonds and all the things that take a struggle to be formed Like.
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: Show me what beauty, your internal beauty, you're making inside of me, because that is your promise and redemption.
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: It's not actually comfort's line to us, like we're seeing in the stats of the blue zone, but actually in the daily.
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: Resistance is where character's built and hope and strength and perseverance, and that's what I'm interested in.
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: In Jesus name, amen, okay, guys, have a good day.