Latest / The Woody Show / HIGHLIGHT POD 30 MINS: The Woody Show October 14th 2026 Podcast

Transcript

HIGHLIGHT POD 30 MINS: The Woody Show October 14th 2026 Podcast · The Woody Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: The Woody Show. Just going back to the conversation about
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: when you were a kid, you did some bad stuff.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Whether it was like super mild or super serious. I mean,
• 0:13
  Speaker 1: all kids do bad stuff. You screw it up. It's
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: part of being a kid. It's super important as a
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: parent to remind yourself of that. Now, it's weird because...
• 0:28
  Speaker 1: I obviously caused some problems. A couple. Yeah, did some
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: bad stuff. But then I'm married to a person who's
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: such a goody-goody. You know what I mean? So when
• 0:40
  Speaker 1: we're talking about our kids and they do something stupid,
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: my son sneaks out of the house or whatever it was, right?
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: And I go, why are there kids? I didn't. What
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: do you mean? I was an angel. Although I wonder
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: how much I really know Like, is my wife lying
• 0:58
  Speaker 1: to me and just, you know, trying to keep this
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: image that she was just so, you know. It reminds
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: me of my favorite movie, Back to the Future, where
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: Lorraine McFly... I never parked with boys. And then Marty
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: goes back to 1955 and she's drinking out of a flask.
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: It's like I haven't parked with boys before, Marty. Okay. Yeah,
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: your wife totally parked with boys. I mean, your wife
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: has a brother. Is he older or younger? What's that?
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: Her brother. Younger. younger yeah because he was the one
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: he was more if there was going to be a
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: troublemaker i don't even think how much trouble he was
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: really in but.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: But comparatively he was the wild one.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: Well of the two yeah again she presents as this
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: total goody-goody that didn't do anything i'm like man i
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: know you you're kind of feisty yeah she's feisty that
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: does that come around as an adult i was gonna.
• 1:57
  Speaker 2: Say she maybe came out of her shell later.
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah um This dad was pissed, man, because the kid
• 2:04
  Speaker 1: took one of their credit cards and then maxed it out. Oh,
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: hell no. Now, if I had done that. And then
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: I got confronted by it. I would just sit there
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: and just take the beating.
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: Oh, dude.
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: This kid's like arguing back.
• 2:19
  Speaker 2: You don't f * * * ing take it.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: I pay her back every time.
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  Speaker 4: Bullsh * *.
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: After she found out you stole it.
• 2:24
  Speaker 4: No, every time.
• 2:25
  Speaker 3: Bullsh * *.
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: She didn't even know.
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: You just f * * * ing took it.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and I just said, here's money. She tried to
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: use her credit card and you f * * *
• 2:30
  Speaker 1: ing took it. Max that already. Who do you think
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: you are?
• 2:35
  Speaker 5: Oh, God, you have no idea what you're talking about.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: You have no idea what life is about. You don't
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: have a lot. Let me see what her credit cards.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: What are you talking about? We're talking about before that.
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: You stupid dick. Don't be sitting there lying about it.
• 2:47
  Speaker 1: You're a thief. You stole my credit card. You stole hers.
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: I hope your friends know what an asshole thief you are. Yeah, yeah.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: Steal it from us and give it to them. You stupid. Oh, man.
• 3:00
  Speaker 1: How do you not end that kid's life?
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: I would report that bitch stolen and be like.
• 3:04
  Speaker 3: Take him.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: That's what I said in middle school. My buddies and
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: I threw smoke bombs into a full travel agency. This
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: one came in. A bank accidentally put $ 5, 200 into my
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: account when I was 18. I withdrew the entire amount
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: and spent it. They came after me. But eventually I
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: wrote it off as bad debt because I made $ 3. 25
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: an hour.
• 3:28
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: But now I'm an electrical contractor. That's good. You figured
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: it out. Yeah, you figured it out. You shaped it.
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: That was their mistake.
• 3:36
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that was part of Monopoly. Bank error in your favor. Yeah, right.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: And you know what? When you got that, rip. They
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: would give you the money. It wasn't go to jail. No.
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: Do not collect $ 200. Yeah, do not pass go. Exactly right.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, if I was 18, I'd be like, well, this
• 3:53
  Speaker 2: is a... An act from God, thank you.
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: No one will know. God has blessed me.
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: Yes, exactly.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: And welcome back. Yes, Jeff Garcia. Yes, your wife is
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: on the phone.
• 4:11
  Speaker 3: Oh, she is.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. You're in trouble.
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  Speaker 6: Yeah, you kind of put her out there a little
• 4:15
  Speaker 6: bit by saying you don't think she's... Oh.
• 4:16
  Speaker 1: You called her. Did she call here? I called her. Oh, okay.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: That's different. That's different.
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: We have a snitch.
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: No, I just figured you'd give her a chance to
• 4:24
  Speaker 1: defend herself. There's no snitching. By the way, I don't say,
• 4:27
  Speaker 1: and she can attest this, I don't say anything here
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: that I wouldn't or haven't said at home. Hey, hello?
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: Can you hear me? Hi. Hi, there she is. It's
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: my wife, Jen. We were talking... in the last couple
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: of segments about you're a good person now, you're a
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: productive member of society now, but you were a bad kid.
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: So Jeff and I were sharing, listeners sharing stories about,
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: you know, the bad stuff that you did as kids.
• 4:53
  Speaker 1: And I said, the tough thing is like all kids
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: have done something for the most part, you know, like
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: whether it's like super mild or super serious and you
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: got in real trouble. And then when you become a parent,
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: you have to remind yourself that you were once a
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: kid and you did a lot of the same types
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: of things And I said, the difficult part is being
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: in a marriage with somebody who presents as such a
• 5:15
  Speaker 1: goody-goody and like, I never did these things. So like
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: when I'm sitting there and I go, we're having a
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: conversation about like something my son or my daughter did.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: And I go, well, you know, I never did those things.
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, come on. You know? Yeah.
• 5:28
  Speaker 3: It's because I never did those things. I'm not presenting.
• 5:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you are. And I wonder, because you're so, she's
• 5:35
  Speaker 1: so feisty now. Oh, dude.
• 5:37
  Speaker 7: Right?
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: You know, it's like, where was this, like, did this
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: develop as an adult? And so she was just this sweet, wallflower,
• 5:47
  Speaker 1: law abiding. Yeah. Because I kind of equated you to,
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: I equated you to Lorraine McFly. Who to her kids
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: and everybody else pretended like she had never drank or
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: parked in cars with boys. And then, you know, Marty
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: McFly found out otherwise when he got to 1955. So. Right.
• 6:10
  Speaker 3: Jesus, you smoke too? Yeah.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So question. And yes, we are putting you on
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: the spot. What is the most trouble you have? What
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: the bad things that you did? Like, what was the
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: worst things you did when you were a kid? Be honest.
• 6:23
  Speaker 3: Well, first of all, I appreciate Jeff G helping me
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: out here because I heard the tail end of this conversation.
• 6:29
  Speaker 3: So I'm glad that he's looking out for me so
• 6:32
  Speaker 3: that I can defend myself. And no, I never did
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: anything that was like over the top crazy. I remember
• 6:39
  Speaker 3: my dad when I was probably about 16 years old
• 6:43
  Speaker 3: running my mouth because I knew everything, of course, like
• 6:45
  Speaker 3: every teenager. And he kind of like slapped me a
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: little bit and that was it.
• 6:51
  Speaker 4: That was the.
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: Only time that I had any sort of major issue
• 6:57
  Speaker 3: i was just i was too afraid of my own
• 6:59
  Speaker 3: shadow you never.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Stole anything from the store you never like uh did
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: anything at school you never ended up with like a
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: detention of any kind.
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: No absolutely not did cocaine yeah you weren't you weren't
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: smoking in the bathrooms or you know like sneaking off somewhere.
• 7:16
  Speaker 5: Going to the club underage yeah fake ids stealing cars ditching.
• 7:21
  Speaker 3: School i had a I had a fake ID. I can't, well,
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: maybe I shouldn't say who I got it from. I
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  Speaker 3: had a fake ID when I was probably 20.
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  Speaker 1: 20?
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  Speaker 3: Almost to 21.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: Yes. Why? Did you get it from your mom or something?
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  Speaker 3: It didn't even really work.
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  Speaker 6: No.
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  Speaker 3: I'm not going to say who I got it from
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: on the air. It didn't even work. The guy from
• 7:42
  Speaker 3: the bar or whatever took it. And that was it.
• 7:45
  Speaker 3: It was like a one-time, two-time effort. And I was like, oh, well,
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: this is dumb. And then I turned 21. Who cares?
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  Speaker 3: But no, I was afraid of my own shadow growing up.
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  Speaker 3: I was very timid and very kind of quiet.
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  Speaker 1: Where's that person?
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: Who is she?
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, bring her back.
• 8:00
  Speaker 8: She's still in there sometimes, but mostly, I mean, it's
• 8:06
  Speaker 8: like 80-20, I would say, of just straight ragging.
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she ran a trap house. There's no way. Something, right?
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: That's all lies. Yes, Jeff. So why was your childhood
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  Speaker 1: so boring?
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  Speaker 8: I don't know, Jeff.
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  Speaker 3: It was just like, I was very fearful of my dad.
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  Speaker 3: And he was not this big, scary guy. But it
• 8:31
  Speaker 3: was mostly because I didn't want to let him down.
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: Because I'm a daddy girl. And I love my mom. Like,
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  Speaker 3: we have a great relationship with my parents. So I
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: just didn't want to let them down.
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  Speaker 2: Now don't you feel bad, Jeff?
• 8:43
  Speaker 3: The idea of them being bummed. Yeah. Like, no way.
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  Speaker 3: And even now, I mean, you can attest to this, Jeffrey.
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: that I struggle with getting into battles with my parents.
• 8:55
  Speaker 3: But other people, I don't have an issue with it.
• 8:58
  Speaker 3: It's weird.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Yeah, she still thinks the way she talks to her parents,
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: even if her parents are pissing her off, she'll talk
• 9:03
  Speaker 1: to them like she's worried that if she says something wrong,
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: she'll be grounded.
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  Speaker 9: See, I'm with Jen on that. As a kid, I
• 9:10
  Speaker 9: couldn't care less what my parents thought. I would go
• 9:13
  Speaker 9: egging or break bottles or whatever. Now as an adult,
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  Speaker 9: I'm like Jen as a kid. All I want to
• 9:20
  Speaker 9: do is please my parents.
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  Speaker 5: Well, I was telling Jeff off the air, and it's
• 9:23
  Speaker 5: kind of similar to Jen, is what worked with me,
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  Speaker 5: my mother would tell me like, oh, your grandmother would
• 9:30
  Speaker 5: be so upset with you. And that super worked because
• 9:34
  Speaker 5: I did not want to disappoint her at all because
• 9:36
  Speaker 5: she was like my favorite in the family.
• 9:38
  Speaker 1: Jeff, I mean, I think I could speak for both
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: of us. We just didn't want to get caught. Yeah,
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  Speaker 1: that's all my goal was. Try to get through without
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: getting caught.
• 9:45
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: That was the goal.
• 9:46
  Speaker 6: And see, I mean, Jen, you are an infomercial for
• 9:50
  Speaker 6: both parents staying together. Because I came from, you know,
• 9:54
  Speaker 6: didn't know my dad, the whole thing. So this is
• 9:56
  Speaker 6: a great commercial right here for stay together for the kids.
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: A healthy fear of stuff.
• 10:00
  Speaker 5: But I get my, my parents were divorced. It was
• 10:03
  Speaker 5: just that guilt trip. It was like, yeah, it was, yeah,
• 10:06
  Speaker 5: it was so good.
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: Well, when they whip out the phrase, I'm not mad.
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: I'm just disappointed. I'm like, Oh God, my heart.
• 10:13
  Speaker 1: Did they say that before or after they hit you?
• 10:14
  Speaker 4: Yep.
• 10:18
  Speaker 1: Hey, I had another, because Greg loves the story. I'm
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: talking about bitch be tripping stories. Greg loves the story
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: about when you ask the question about like, what does
• 10:27
  Speaker 1: that little truck do that's in front of the plane
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: at the gate? And I said, well, it pushes the
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: plane away from the gate. And she looked at me
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: and she goes, does it look like it's as stupid
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: across my forehead? You mean that little truck as well?
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: I'm supposed to believe that little truck pushes that big plane.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yes, I swear that's how it works. What
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: did you just ask me the other day? And I go,
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: are you serious? There was another one that was almost
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: as good as the plane.
• 10:52
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah, it was a plane thing.
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: It was another plane thing?
• 10:56
  Speaker 3: Oh, my gosh, what was it?
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Oh, dude, Greg, there was another one that was just
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: as good. Oh, my God, I got to know. Search
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: that memory bank. Oh, thank you, Greg.
• 11:06
  Speaker 3: I'll remember.
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if you can think of it, text me. If
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: you can think of it, text me, because I've got
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: to share that with Greg. Oh, my God. I can't wait.
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: I will.
• 11:12
  Speaker 3: It was some sort of either... airline thing or a
• 11:17
  Speaker 3: truck or something, like a semi-truck.
• 11:19
  Speaker 4: I don't know.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: It's like how something works.
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: It's not a man thing.
• 11:22
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: And I go, no, it's XY. Damn it. What was that?
• 11:26
  Speaker 1: I thought for sure.
• 11:27
  Speaker 3: I know what you're talking about. I can't remember because
• 11:30
  Speaker 3: as soon as I said.
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: It, I heard it and I was like, oh God. Yeah.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: She looked at me because when I gave her the answer,
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: she's like, no. Right, right.
• 11:36
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: Here, I said, I know you don't believe me, so
• 11:39
  Speaker 1: I Googled it on the spot. Man, what was it?
• 11:41
  Speaker 9: Well, can I, I'll tell you my- My recent one, Jen,
• 11:44
  Speaker 9: that I already told everybody here is I was walking
• 11:49
  Speaker 9: with Mario and I saw a lifeguard tower. It was
• 11:51
  Speaker 9: completely closed and it had a sign on that little
• 11:54
  Speaker 9: door that you put over the window and it says
• 11:56
  Speaker 9: no lifeguard on duty. And I said, what a stupid
• 11:59
  Speaker 9: place to put that sign on the lifeguard tower. That's
• 12:03
  Speaker 9: like going to a restaurant and saying, having a sign,
• 12:05
  Speaker 9: we don't serve food.
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: And Mario said, Yes, because there's no lifeguard at work
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: right now. When they're not there, they lower the door.
• 12:13
  Speaker 3: And I said, Like, where else would the lifeguard be?
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Why have a tower if there's no lifeguard? Speak on it, Greg.
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: All right, babe. Well, you know, thank you for picking up.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Try to remember.
• 12:30
  Speaker 3: Yes.
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if you remember what it is.
• 12:32
  Speaker 3: Thank you, Jesse, for defending me.
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: No, I just wanted some good radio. That's all.
• 12:38
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I was a good kid through and through.
• 12:41
  Speaker 1: Am I the only one that believes her? Adult is
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: a different story. I think I'm the only one that
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: believes her. No, I believe her. She's a good kid. Yeah,
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: but y'all don't live with her. No, I don't. I do.
• 12:50
  Speaker 1: She's full of fat. All right, love you, bye. Love you, bye.
• 12:54
  Speaker 1: There's Jen. I really wish what... I gotta know. I
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: can't remember. She asked me, I go, are you effing serious?
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: Was it about like a steering wheel on a plane?
• 13:03
  Speaker 7: No, no, no.
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I'm trying to think what it could be. I don't
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: even think it had to do anything with... A plane?
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure it didn't have anything to do with planes. Okay.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: She said a truck. Yeah, it was a total bitch
• 13:11
  Speaker 1: be tripping situation. And then she realized it as it's
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: coming out of her mouth. That's the best. I'm trying
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: to call my wife back real quick. Back?
• 13:24
  Speaker 3: Why?
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: This isn't over.
• 13:25
  Speaker 1: No, we figured it out. You did?
• 13:27
  Speaker 3: Oh, okay.
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: Awesome. I said that, you know, I brought up that
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: old bitch be tripping thing about, you know.
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: Hello. Hello.
• 13:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Hey, I'm just filling everybody in that we figured
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: it out. Thank God.
• 13:38
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: And then there was another thing that she asked me about.
• 13:40
  Speaker 1: And when I told her the answer, she looked at
• 13:42
  Speaker 1: me like I was nuts and I was lying to
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: her and I had to Google it. To prove it.
• 13:46
  Speaker 1: To prove that it was. Yeah. She was asking about gliders.
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 13:51
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 13:52
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 13:52
  Speaker 1: Gliders. And she goes, so they don't have an engine. Yeah. Yeah.
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: How do they get up in the sky? Oh, And
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: I go, well, they're towed up there. Even I know that. Yeah.
• 14:02
  Speaker 1: They get towed. Yeah, they're towed by another plane up there.
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: An actual plane.
• 14:06
  Speaker 2: They start high.
• 14:06
  Speaker 1: And it's released. And then it's like, the cable comes undone.
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: The cable comes undone. She looks at me like... okay
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: here we go again i go i swear to you
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: i have no reason so yeah so i googled it
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: and i looked up i go look here boom she's
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: like okay huh i have another question for you.
• 14:23
  Speaker 5: Jen did you watch the movie 50 shades of gray
• 14:26
  Speaker 5: i didn't even watch it but i know that's in
• 14:28
  Speaker 5: that movie It's in.
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: Fifty Shades of Grey?
• 14:31
  Speaker 3: No, I can't remember that.
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: She's a goody-goody, dude. Oh, yeah. She never watched that.
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: I'm a goody-goody, man.
• 14:35
  Speaker 3: I'm not watching that kind of slutty stuff.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: I'm not watching that skin flick. Yeah. Oh, hey, you
• 14:42
  Speaker 1: know what?
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Yeah, I never felt so... I mean, I've felt pretty
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: dumb in other situations, too, but that one was pretty good.
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: I was like, wow, okay, that makes sense now, but
• 14:52
  Speaker 3: what do I know about airplanes? I don't know.
• 14:54
  Speaker 1: All right, so here, while I have you on the phone,
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: because I know this.
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: Kind of came up and I I know what the
• 15:01
  Speaker 1: I know what the answer is in my relationship and
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: in my house I was surprised to hear Gina's take
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: on this but this started because I saw a story
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: right a question for the ladies and Cops in New Jersey,
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: they got this massage parlor that they raided. It's called
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: Waterfall Therapy. Now, the owner gets arrested for promoting prostitution.
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: They found like 10 grand in cash, a mustache in
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: the ceiling tiles and stuff like that. That definitely looks legit. No,
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: for sure. That's normal. And they found some other things
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: that absolutely have nothing to do with legit massage. Here's
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: another fun fact about waterfall therapy. This is the second
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: time this year that they've been raided by the cops. Whoopsie.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: The last time two chicks got charged, they were shut down,
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: but then the business was back up and running within
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: a week. Sweet. And they weren't even trying to hide
• 15:52
  Speaker 1: what was going on there. Their website literally advertises happy
• 15:55
  Speaker 1: ending on the massage menu.
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: Well, there you go.
• 15:58
  Speaker 3: So.
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: This came up recently, the idea of happy massage, because
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: out of nowhere, Gina says, would you guys be pissed?
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: She was talking. There was my wife and a couple.
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: I knew that. Would you guys be pissed if your
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: husband got a happy ending massage? Now, the answer in
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: my house is absolutely yes. I would think.
• 16:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Emphatically, yes.
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: Emphatically.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: You wouldn't be cool with that? I mean, I do
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: like a good massage. If I went to some massage
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: place and they offered a happy ending and I took
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: them up on it, you wouldn't be okay with that
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: at all.
• 16:38
  Speaker 3: No, no, I would have many questions, and then we
• 16:40
  Speaker 3: would have many issues.
• 16:41
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: Okay, because Gina said she wouldn't have a problem with that.
• 16:45
  Speaker 7: I know, you're crazy, Gina.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't think it's that big of a deal.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 16:48
  Speaker 1: But why?
• 16:49
  Speaker 2: Well, think of the whole massage. Like, that's a very
• 16:51
  Speaker 2: intimate thing, but you don't think of it that way.
• 16:53
  Speaker 2: You're just getting rubbed down. So what does it matter
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: if it's that one body part as opposed to, like,
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: your back and your legs? And, like, to me, you're
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: just there to get whatever release you're getting anyway.
• 17:04
  Speaker 4: That body part is associated with sex and associated with
• 17:09
  Speaker 4: love and, I don't know, it's a totally separate, you
• 17:13
  Speaker 4: can't lump that body part in with the other body part.
• 17:17
  Speaker 2: I think, I mean, if somebody's already like touching on
• 17:20
  Speaker 2: your man, like rubbing his back and stuff, I'd be like,
• 17:23
  Speaker 2: I mean, you're 80% there. But that's what I'm saying.
• 17:26
  Speaker 1: This isn't... Sexual touch and other types of touch are
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: not the same.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: But I would be much... more, like, afraid for my
• 17:33
  Speaker 2: relationship if there was some sort of, like, girl that
• 17:36
  Speaker 2: kept texting him that he was friends with or they
• 17:39
  Speaker 2: were going out and getting drinks. That would freak me out.
• 17:41
  Speaker 2: But hearing, like.
• 17:42
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: I turned over and they.
• 17:44
  Speaker 2: I knocked one out. I'd be like, well, okay. I...
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: Kind of get it. I don't think it's that big
• 17:48
  Speaker 2: of a deal.
• 17:49
  Speaker 1: Sammy, would that fly in your relationship? No. Could Steamboat Willie?
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: Don't tell Andy that. No, I'm with your wife on this, Woody.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: I would have a lot of questions.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: There would be a conversation.
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: What questions would you have? What questions? You would stick
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: around and ask questions? What are you doing? What are
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: you doing? They asked me if I wanted a happy ending.
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, I got a couple extra minutes.
• 18:08
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 18:08
  Speaker 4: Are you insane is a good question.
• 18:11
  Speaker 1: I don't think you're going to date her. But again,
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: why insane?
• 18:15
  Speaker 3: Because it's meant for sexual activity, which usually is associated
• 18:21
  Speaker 3: with people that.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: You care about. So if I'm Andy, right, and now
• 18:26
  Speaker 1: I'm married to Gina, and I opt in for the
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: happy ending massage, is the question still, are you insane? Like,
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: it would be insane because I know how you feel
• 18:36
  Speaker 1: about it. I know that you are absolutely against it.
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: That would be the, are you insane part.
• 18:40
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: Otherwise, if someone's just offering you like a handy... Yeah,
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: I don't think there's anything behind it. That's not insane.
• 18:45
  Speaker 9: That's the polar opposite of insane.
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: Like, if you offered me a handy and I considered it,
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: am I insane?
• 18:52
  Speaker 6: Right.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: You know where that leads. Yeah, see, what we're trying
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: to say is.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: No, there's a relationship. There's no relationship with the rando.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: At the massage parlor.
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: That's kind of my point, too.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: Because there could be a disconnect, because it's just about
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: the release. It's not, like, I'm not interested in a
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: relationship with the handjob lady. And if you.
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: Close your eyes, you don't even know which one it is.
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: It's just happening.
• 19:15
  Speaker 3: You might see afterwards if she does a good enough job.
• 19:17
  Speaker 5: So what we're saying is, like, what Gina's saying is
• 19:22
  Speaker 5: It is awesome, but there's going to be repercussions.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: Again, there's a lot of women who I don't think
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: would mind that. I think more than not, they would mind.
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: I think more are like Sammy and my wife.
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: I get it, but I think there's a lot of
• 19:39
  Speaker 2: things that are obviously cheating. To me, it's not probably
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: great for your relationship, depending on what your thing is.
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: Question on the text. What if it was like a
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: handy by some random chick at a bar That's different.
• 19:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm not. That's not.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: Because they had socialization.
• 19:55
  Speaker 2: That's cheating. If you're just doing a business transaction of
• 19:58
  Speaker 2: a rub down and then you just, you know, top
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: it off.
• 20:02
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but what.
• 20:03
  Speaker 7: You're saying, Gina, is like, well, whatever. They just needed
• 20:06
  Speaker 7: a release. So that would be the same thing for
• 20:07
  Speaker 7: the girl at the bar as it would be for
• 20:09
  Speaker 7: a massage. Why not get the release from you when
• 20:11
  Speaker 7: they get home? Why does it need to be right now?
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: Well, first of all, it's a win win.
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: It's like when you're doing a renovation, right, Craig? You're like, well.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: We already have the bathroom. Exactly. And you're already all
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: oiled up.
• 20:22
  Speaker 2: They're not like having a drink, like laughing and cheersing.
• 20:24
  Speaker 2: It's just transactional.
• 20:27
  Speaker 1: It's just a rub down. I couldn't do it. But
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: I do understand what you're saying. I do understand the thinking.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: I can also understand why there are some women who
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: wouldn't care because it, quote, gets them out of doing it.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: It's the win-win. They're so not into it.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: Oh, that's so sad.
• 20:44
  Speaker 1: They're so not into it themselves. You know what I mean?
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: They're like, oh, God. I think about my poor friend Dan.
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: I think if Dan had the opportunity... to get a
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: handy at a massage place. And he took them up.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: I think his wife might be okay with it because
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: she's probably the last thing. You know, Dan, Jen, I don't,
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: you think that would be a pretty accurate. Oh, can
• 21:08
  Speaker 1: you hear him? Can you hear us? Nope. Yeah. Yeah.
• 21:10
  Speaker 3: I got you guys.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: When you agree about Dan, like if, if Dan, my buddy,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: Dan got a, an offer of a, of a handy
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: release at a massage place. Don't you think his wife
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: would probably be cool because it gets her out of
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: doing it.
• 21:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so I don't want to speak for her because
• 21:25
  Speaker 3: that's not fair, but yeah.
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: We know them. Yeah, that's the vibe.
• 21:29
  Speaker 3: Yeah, but she's not here to defend herself. But yeah,
• 21:31
  Speaker 3: their relationship is very unique. They seem more like friends
• 21:36
  Speaker 3: than actual partners.
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: She doesn't want to do that.
• 21:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: She doesn't want to see his penis.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: Well, then for them it might be– that's so sad.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: For them it might be convenient.
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we're totally using fake names. No, we're not.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: It's my buddy Dan. As I said, he would probably,
• 21:48
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying anything that he wouldn't share. Okay, so Gina,
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: I have a question for you.
• 21:53
  Speaker 7: Would you accept someone, a massage therapist, doing that to you?
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: If you were there and already lubed up and just
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: needed a release? And you know what the sign is, right?
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: For a woman, if you're supposed to lift your hips
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: up off the table.
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: I thought that was for dudes, too.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I thought that was universal.
• 22:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, so is that what you do for everyone?
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: I thought that was just for the women. Really? It
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: was like the lift the hips up off the table thing.
• 22:17
  Speaker 1: I didn't know women got happy endings. I think the
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: guys is a little bit more straightforward. They're like, you
• 22:21
  Speaker 1: like handy? And they go, yes. They have to say
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: it just like that. Happy ending? And you go, yes.
• 22:26
  Speaker 5: I thought, yeah, women just had sex with strippers, not
• 22:29
  Speaker 5: massage people.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah, at bachelorette parties. Right.
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: So if I were to get a happy ending.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, just reverse the rules.
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: Well, see, this is, I think, I think gender plays
• 22:38
  Speaker 2: a role here because I think in general, if you
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: can get that done for a woman, then that's a
• 22:43
  Speaker 2: big deal guys. It's like, that's easy.
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: See, I mean, that's not the question. That's what I'm saying.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: I don't think it would be the same. Like, thank
• 22:50
  Speaker 2: God I'm married to the person I'm married to. Cause
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: it's all good.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: He wouldn't be cool with that. Oh, there's no, there's
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: no way that Andy be cool with you getting digitized.
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: No, but I'm saying, I think it's different because I
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: think I, I, I, I, you're, you're going in, side somebody.
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah but that's just the function of it the whole
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: idea doesn't.
• 23:10
  Speaker 9: Yeah you're trying to change the hypothetical exactly no I'm.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: Trying to be honest and say I don't think it's
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: equal I'm saying I don't think it's the same. And
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: I'm trying to tell you why.
• 23:19
  Speaker 7: That's my thing is like, if I thought about me
• 23:21
  Speaker 7: doing that, that would be so weird and strange and bizarre.
• 23:25
  Speaker 7: I wouldn't ever want to that. I feel like the
• 23:27
  Speaker 7: person I'm in a relationship with should feel just as
• 23:30
  Speaker 7: strange and bizarre.
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: Having that happen to them. I just think that guys
• 23:33
  Speaker 2: doing it is so much more transactional.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: I just had a thought. Let me, let me.
• 23:37
  Speaker 3: Okay, but Gina, like you had said it before that it's, it's,
• 23:42
  Speaker 3: way worse if your husband or boyfriend has some little
• 23:46
  Speaker 3: cutesy relationship via text or whatever that is way and
• 23:51
  Speaker 3: I agree with that that's infinitely worse like you're not
• 23:54
  Speaker 3: going to sit there and text somebody and be all
• 23:55
  Speaker 3: cute and be like oh look at this reel or
• 23:57
  Speaker 3: this meme that I only thought of you Hell no.
• 24:01
  Speaker 1: Okay, so that leads me to my question here. Okay,
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: so let's put the sex stuff aside for a second.
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: If women are really like that, we're talking about this
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: emotional connection or this little cutesy back and forth texting
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: kind of thing, whatever that might be. Guys are told
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: all the time that when a woman has a friend
• 24:20
  Speaker 1: and they've connected with this guy friend and they're hanging
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: out together and they're texting stuff back and forth because
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: that stuff doesn't mean anything to a dude. As a dude,
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: I could be texting Gina or Sammy or whoever and
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: I'm just sharing something funny or, hey, I saw this,
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: I thought of you. It just has nothing to do
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: with anything else. To women, that is more important than
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: the sexual aspect of things. From what I'm led to
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: believe here.
• 24:44
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: A lot of ways. Yeah.
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah. That's worse. So why are guys supposed to be then? Cool.
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: If that means so much to women and women are
• 24:51
  Speaker 1: doing that with guys who are, quote, just friends. That's
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: the connection.
• 24:54
  Speaker 2: I agree.
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: That's the intimate part for women.
• 24:57
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: So why are we supposed to be cool with that?
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: I totally agree.
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: Nothing sexual happening. Well, apparently that's not as intimate. I'm
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: just connecting on every level. That's not as intimate and
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: using your own logic here, ladies. That's not as intimate
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: as what you're doing with this person. You just got
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: to be cool with the lies, dude. That's all. Right?
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think there's something to that.
• 25:18
  Speaker 9: And you've got to be happy that Jen is totally
• 25:20
  Speaker 9: mama-bearing your wiener.
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah. She's like, it's mine. Get away. You know why?
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: Because there's literally not enough to go around. There's not
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: enough to go around. We're rationed here.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: And this is a very safe hypothetical for me because
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: my husband would never do that.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah. All right.
• 25:38
  Speaker 3: I've never heard the phrase mama bear your wiener ever again.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: It's pretty gross.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: That's what you're doing, John. Well, it's my wife, Jen, everybody. Again.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: Love you again. Love you. Bye. All right, man. We
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: got down a rabbit hole there. But yeah, like this place,
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: they got busted twice, twice this year. And it had
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: right on the menu. They were literally advertising happy ending. Sweet. Well,
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: I mean, in those words, happy ending right on the
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: massage menu. Transactional.
• 26:10
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: Is that called direct marketing or? That's just the menu. Yeah. 877-44-WOODY.
• 26:16
  Speaker 1: Text us over to 22987. We've got the conversation going
• 26:20
  Speaker 1: on that text. Oh, yeah. Oh, man. All right. More
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Woody shows next.
• 26:23
  Speaker 3: Hang on.