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EP.82: The Confidence Gap: Why Women Wait & How to Move Anyway | The Ambitious Podcast · Ambitious Podcast

• 0:00
  We're told to not brag, we're told to be humble, we're told to
• 0:03
  not take up too much space. And So what ends up happening is
• 0:06
  as women, we try to play small. Confidence is not something that
• 0:10
  we think our way into, it's actually something we do.
• 0:12
  The confidence you're looking for is a by product of specific
• 0:16
  types of actions. I overcompensated so
• 0:19
  aggressively to give myself any aspect of confidence and that
• 0:22
  was because no one could possibly say a bad thing about
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  me, my service, my brand, if I busted my butt and every
• 0:28
  customer was right in every moment.
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  Confidence is not the absence of fear, it is about the presence
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  of trust. You got to remove that as the
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  reason you're not going to get where you want to go because The
• 0:38
  thing is, if you need everything to line up, you're never going
• 0:42
  to do. Hello and welcome back to
• 0:44
  Ambitious. Today we are talking all things
• 0:47
  confidence. This is something as a topic
• 0:50
  that so many people, including myself, want to understand
• 0:53
  better, which is how do those entrepreneurs who are so wildly
• 0:57
  successful have the confidence to just seem like they can run
• 1:01
  through a wall? They're so determined, they're
• 1:03
  so committed, they're so clear and confident in what they're
• 1:06
  doing, how they're going to do it.
• 1:08
  And it just seems like they have this level of trust and inner
• 1:11
  knowing that you wonder, how do I tap into that?
• 1:15
  What is that? What do I need to do to have
• 1:17
  that level of confidence in myself and my own business?
• 1:20
  And one of the things that I've learned is that there really is
• 1:24
  a, call it a science to better understanding how to really tap
• 1:29
  into that level of confidence, that level of conviction.
• 1:32
  And one of the things that I've found and discovered even in my
• 1:35
  own journey and with many clients that I've witnessed who
• 1:37
  become very successful in business is that confidence is
• 1:41
  not something that we think our way into.
• 1:44
  It's actually something we do and the confidence you're
• 1:48
  looking for is a byproduct of specific types of actions.
• 1:52
  And I wanted today really unpack what I would consider and kind
• 1:57
  of, you know, use as the term the confidence gap, which is
• 2:00
  really how do we go from where we are right now in our current,
• 2:04
  you know, ways in our life, in our business and start to really
• 2:07
  tap into this bigger level of confidence to be able to go for
• 2:11
  the things that scare the crap out of us.
• 2:12
  Maybe for you, it's starting a podcast.
• 2:14
  It could be doing a speaking engagement, could be the fact
• 2:17
  that you want to charge that new price you're looking for.
• 2:21
  It can be the confidence to show up maybe as a leader or a brand
• 2:25
  or a face in this online space or in your business in a very
• 2:29
  specific way, but you lack a little bit of confidence to go
• 2:34
  for that. And listen, I've been there,
• 2:36
  which is why I, after witnessing so many incredible entrepreneurs
• 2:40
  who are so wildly confident, ask myself, OK, how the heck do I
• 2:44
  tap into that? Because that's something that I
• 2:46
  know will really unlock things for me.
• 2:48
  If I can tap into that level of confidence, I'm basically going
• 2:52
  to become invincible with my goals and with progress.
• 2:55
  And so today we're going to break all that down.
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  So I actually want to kind of really unpack what I mean by the
• 3:01
  confidence gap. So the confidence gap is
• 3:03
  actually going to refer to the discrepancy basically between
• 3:06
  our competence, meaning the actual skill or ability that we
• 3:10
  have to do something in comparison to confidence.
• 3:13
  Why I really wanted to dedicate an entire episode like today to
• 3:16
  this is because this is actually different amongst women than it
• 3:20
  is amongst men. Because we really, as women, are
• 3:25
  often times under estimating our capabilities of what we feel
• 3:30
  that we can actually do. And so because of that, we lack
• 3:33
  confidence. And when we lack confidence, we
• 3:35
  lack intentional action, we lack movement, We lack progress in
• 3:39
  areas that we could do it, but because we don't believe we're
• 3:42
  competent or that we have the capabilities to do so, we don't
• 3:45
  take action and we don't move. And so there was actually a
• 3:56
  study that I wanted to to unpack and it's kind of like blew my
• 3:59
  mind, if I'm going to be honest. And it basically was the Hewlett
• 4:03
  Packard study. And basically what it found was
• 4:05
  that men, this was in the context of applying for jobs,
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  but men apply for jobs when they meet 60% of the qualifications
• 4:13
  for a job. Whereas in contrast, women
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  typically only apply to a job if they saw themselves meeting 100%
• 4:19
  of the criteria. So what this study basically
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  kind of looked to conclude or what it really showcased and
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  what it tells us even today as we talk about confidence is that
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  we are holding ourselves back as women, not because we can't do
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  certain things, not because we don't have the confidence, not
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  because we don't have the capabilities potentially, but
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  because we believe that we have to, in our mind, for some
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  reason, meet every single standard first before moving,
• 4:48
  first before taking action. And so it's really not a lack of
• 4:52
  ability for us to do the things that we want to do because you
• 4:56
  and I frankly have a lot of abilities, a lot of
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  capabilities, a lot of competence in many different
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  areas. But if we do not believe
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  ourselves to be competent, if we don't believe ourselves to be
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  capable, it is the core thing that is keeping us from going
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  for big things both in our life and within our businesses.
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  And so we want to ask ourselves, you know, obviously we see again
• 5:17
  that contrast, right? If men look at something that
• 5:19
  they want to do and they don't have all the criteria to do it,
• 5:22
  60% of that most move forward. Whereas in contrast, women need
• 5:27
  100% of the criteria met to be able to move forward.
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  So why is that? And I started to ask myself, you
• 5:34
  know, as women, why do we sometimes lack confidence?
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  What, what, where does it come from?
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  So if we're struggling with confidence in a certain area,
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  again, in our life or in our business, why is that?
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  Where does that kind of originate?
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  And I, when I started to unpack it and I started to really think
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  through and kind of, you know, brain dump, OK, well, if we want
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  to be confident women, what needs to be rewritten?
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  What needs to be better understood or changed or altered
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  to help us to tap into that? One of the things that, you
• 6:02
  know, I'll at least I will speak for myself that I have even seen
• 6:05
  and felt is this aspect of culture, right?
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  So as women, we are from a cultural perspective, we're told
• 6:11
  to not brag. We're told to be humble.
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  We're told to not take up too much space.
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  And basically what this internalizes for us is that it
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  really teaches us not to be attention seeking.
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  It really teaches us that, you know, it reinforces in us that
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  confidence is really almost this aspect of arrogance.
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  It connects our confidence to arrogance because of these
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  cultural, you know, messages and norms that have kind of been
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  placed on us. And So what ends up happening is
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  as women, we try to play small. We try to, you know, be not too
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  loud or not shine too bright in a specific room, you know, not
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  to take up too much space and to remain humble and don't brag and
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  don't boast and all of these things.
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  And I see this with women in my world all the time.
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  There's women who will have these massive wins and these
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  massive milestones that they're achieving in their life and
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  their business, but they don't want to talk about it because if
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  they do, they feel like they're taking up too much space or
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  they're not being humble. And as women, we're like, Oh,
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  no, we're taught by society that we're supposed to be humble and
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  we're supposed to be, you know, centered and calm and not to
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  brag or not to take up too much space.
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  But what we don't probably ask ourselves enough is with all of
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  that programming and with all that messaging that we've been
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  given since we were little girls, how are we going to
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  rewrite that? How are we going to decide
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  whether that actually does, in fact, feel true for us?
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  And so the reason I mentioned young girls and when we were
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  little is because this is also something we see in the
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  education setting, right? So when we are growing up, we
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  are trained to act correct and not to be courageous.
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  Now, obviously, as our, you know, for myself, I'm 32 and so
• 7:52
  my boomer parents were very much the start, in my opinion, of
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  like really integrating within us this feminist movement of the
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  fact that we could be courageous, that we could start
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  to, you know, test out new things and, and take up more
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  space. But again, there still was a
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  good majority of society that was teaching us the opposite,
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  which was that, you know, even in school, girls were often
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  rewarded for getting things right.
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  So like getting the right answers on a test, you getting
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  the right answer when there was interactions within class and
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  for following the rules and for basically being diligent within
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  the classroom. Whereas boys often times were
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  more rewarded for like risk taking and assertiveness and
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  kind of like putting themselves out there.
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  And So what we started to take from that is when we're kids,
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  we're starting to see that me making a mistake means me
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  failing. And so that creates another deep
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  ingrained belief enough us, right?
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  Is the fact that, you know, confidence is based off of
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  certainty. It's not based off of potential
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  success. So again, the certainty of
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  success, not the potential of success.
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  And so in entrepreneurship, we see this all the time.
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  We look for these these situations where we feel like we
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  need to have everything perfect. Everything has to be dialed
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  before we can act or before we feel confident enough to be able
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  to move in the thing that we want to do.
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  And I will say that when I was kind of growing up, especially
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  for myself, we've talked about in other other podcasts, the
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  fact that when I was in, you know, elementary school, I
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  discovered that I had a learning disability.
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  And when that happened, it really killed my confidence
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  because what it meant is that like I was even more prone to
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  taking action that was not going to result in the right or the
• 9:38
  certain or the correct outcome. And so I think that when we
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  start to think about how do we become more confident, it's
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  important for us to look at where does that come from?
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  It comes from culture and society telling us not to take
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  up space to basically, you know, to be honest, be more humble and
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  with that more dialed in. Second, we learn in school a lot
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  that the fact like our value is going to come from not how
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  courageous we are or how, you know out there we are, but more
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  the grades that we get, the correctness, even the the
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  aspects when you think about it as as women, the emphasis that
• 10:12
  we had on being polite, right or like doing the right thing and
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  saying the right thing or taking the right action at the specific
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  time. It's all this ingrained
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  correctness that really, frankly puts a lot of boundaries and
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  bumper lanes on us to not necessarily always tune into
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  what we feel we need to do or what we feel we want to do.
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  And the other thing that is also a huge factor in our confidence
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  to do things is the reality of our past experiences.
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  And so for some people, they have, you know, traumatic past
• 10:42
  experiences of rejection. For example, they might have, as
• 10:46
  a result of that rejection sensitivity, meaning that you
• 10:49
  have a really heightened fear of being misunderstood or you have
• 10:53
  a really heightened fear of being judged.
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  And so because of that, you don't take risk because you
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  believe that if I do take this thing and if I do put myself out
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  there, I've been ridiculed in a way before that I don't want to
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  relive again. I've been rejected in a way
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  before that I don't want to do again.
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  And it can be something simple. It could be the fact that, you
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  know, when you were in high school, you decided that you
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  wanted to dress a certain way or do your hair a certain way or
• 11:20
  hang with a certain group of people.
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  And that made you become ridiculed or judged or even at
• 11:27
  the more extreme extent bullied. And so then when you think about
• 11:30
  now, you as an adult saying, hey, I'm going to go against the
• 11:32
  grain and I'm going to disrupt this industry.
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  You take that understanding of that childhood experience.
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  You take that understanding of what you've gone through.
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  And you show up and you say, I don't know if I want to disrupt
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  the space. I don't know if I want to rock
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  the boat. Because I remember that feeling
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  in my mind, in my body of what that felt like when I last
• 11:53
  thought that was a good idea and it didn't work out for me.
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  Or if you maybe have taken a risk before in something that
• 11:59
  you've wanted to do and you failed or you feel like it
• 12:02
  didn't turn out the way that you had anticipated, that can scar
• 12:05
  us. It can create these wounds
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  within us that tell us that we don't want to feel or experience
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  or think that again. And so because of that, it leads
• 12:13
  us to, you know, show up in a very different space.
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  And So what I will say is past experiences of being dismissed
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  or past experiences even of being, you know, overlooked can
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  really 'cause people to overthink every single move that
• 12:30
  they're making. Ask yourself, when's maybe an
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  experience that you've had in elementary school, maybe it was
• 12:36
  in high school, maybe it was in college or university, and you
• 12:40
  felt dismissed, you felt overlooked, you felt judged, you
• 12:44
  felt that you didn't fit in. And then you think about trying
• 12:48
  to flex that muscle now and those feelings come up for us.
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  We know even from our other trauma episodes, we talked about
• 12:55
  that trauma stored in the body, right?
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  We have these memories that are stored in our brain, in our
• 12:59
  subconscious. We have these memories, they're
• 13:01
  stored within our bodies. And so we think as business
• 13:06
  owners and as entrepreneurs, as women, that we're like, oh, I
• 13:10
  just can't seem to figure out why I'm not doing the thing.
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  The top thing I hear all the time is women saying, I know
• 13:15
  what I need to do, but I'm just not doing it.
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  And I can't figure out why. And This is why we talk about
• 13:21
  these things. This is why we want to unravel.
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  Where is it coming from? Because so many of us have
• 13:26
  programming, have beliefs that were given to us from
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  experiences or from others around us.
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  And we take those with us into adulthood.
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  And then we start to wonder, OK, well, why are my actions not
• 13:37
  what I want them to be? That's because your beliefs are
• 13:41
  not really something that correlate or that match the
• 13:44
  actions that you're wanting from yourself.
• 13:46
  And so that's really where we need to start in order to kind
• 13:48
  of create this harmony between the two sides.
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  So the other thing that I will say is if your nervous system
• 13:57
  has learned that being bold means also it's connected in
• 14:01
  some capacity to danger, you're going to always try in some
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  capacity to shrink yourself. And what I mean by boldness
• 14:10
  doesn't have to be anything extreme.
• 14:12
  It could even be potentially that you grew up in a household
• 14:15
  where you feel like if you were outspoken and if you really
• 14:18
  shared some big beliefs or some big thoughts that they were not
• 14:21
  received well, it could be potentially in your friend group
• 14:24
  that that was the case. It could be boldness to say that
• 14:28
  you wanted to do something that was a big performance, for
• 14:31
  example, in high school in front of your class and you felt
• 14:33
  judged. I remember the first, you know,
• 14:35
  instance that comes up for me is I remember I was in elementary
• 14:38
  school and we had to do speeches and you had to go in front of
• 14:42
  the entire class and basically have your memorized speech and
• 14:45
  you had to present it. That for me, I remember like it
• 14:48
  was yesterday, it was so much anxiety for me and it was so
• 14:52
  overwhelming. And then when I got as an
• 14:54
  entrepreneur into public speaking, guess what came up?
• 14:58
  I wasn't thinking about public speaking.
• 14:59
  I was thinking about me in grade 7 or grade 8 doing this speech
• 15:03
  in front of my class and struggling through it because I
• 15:07
  was so nervous. And so then when I started to go
• 15:10
  into public speaking as an entrepreneur, I thought, uh oh.
• 15:13
  Because like I like for most people, public speaking is one
• 15:16
  of their core #1 fears. And here I am saying that I
• 15:21
  want. And I knew that I had the
• 15:22
  potential. This is the thing, I knew I had
• 15:24
  the potential to be a good communicator because I'm a good
• 15:27
  communicator on my own. Meaning if I'm talking to you
• 15:30
  here or if I'm talking to you in a one-on-one setting or even in
• 15:33
  a private group setting, I'm good.
• 15:34
  For some reason, when you put a stage underneath my feet, I
• 15:38
  freak out and I have this body feeling that's extremely
• 15:41
  overwhelming. And what I recognized was that
• 15:44
  feeling had nothing to do with the stage because frankly, the
• 15:46
  first stage I ever spoke on, I'd never spoken before.
• 15:49
  So I no context to what was going to happen.
• 15:52
  I had no context to what was going to unfold.
• 15:56
  Would it work? Would I do well?
• 15:57
  Would I not do well? None of that.
• 15:58
  I had context of What I did have context of is the last time that
• 16:02
  I'd spoke in front of a group of people, which was me in Grade 8,
• 16:05
  who was struggling through this speech and the feeling I
• 16:08
  remember vividly that I had doing that and how I did not
• 16:11
  want to feel that again. So it really became an
• 16:14
  invitation for me to look at how my past experiences or how have
• 16:19
  other situations that had parallels to this thing that I'm
• 16:23
  struggling to have confidence in.
• 16:25
  How are those influencing me in this moment to not show up in a
• 16:28
  way that I want to for myself and also for my business?
• 16:33
  And the other one that I will say is a is a huge 1 is this
• 16:37
  idea of like internalized perfectionism.
• 16:40
  And most importantly that we see with a lot of entrepreneurs is
• 16:43
  imposter syndrome. Perfectionism really is, in my
• 16:47
  opinion, a mask that is over top of this fear of being
• 16:52
  inadequate, right? So when we want to get
• 16:57
  everything perfect, like for me, I remember again going back to
• 17:01
  the the first speaking opportunity I had, I remember
• 17:04
  working on the slides like over and over and over.
• 17:06
  I remember rehearsing what I was going to say when I got on stage
• 17:10
  in the first couple words that I would say to to the group.
• 17:13
  And I remember wanting to make it perfect and spent hours and
• 17:16
  hours and hours trying to edit and refine and adjust to make it
• 17:20
  perfect. And what I came to realize was
• 17:23
  the desire to make it perfect was to protect myself from
• 17:26
  judgement. And even now it's something that
• 17:29
  I see with myself. Anytime I catch myself trying to
• 17:31
  make something perfect, I go whoop.
• 17:33
  This is something for me that is actually my effort to protect
• 17:38
  myself from judgement. And so you may, in your business
• 17:43
  and in your life be right now trying to make a certain thing
• 17:47
  perfect, a certain offer perfect, a certain brand
• 17:50
  perfect, a certain pitch perfect.
• 17:53
  And people really dive into the nuts and bolts to make it
• 17:56
  perfect, perfect, perfect. Because if they do, there's this
• 17:59
  perception that by making something perfect, we're
• 18:02
  protecting ourselves from judgement.
• 18:05
  When you think about perfectionism, we want to
• 18:08
  realize that perfectionism is really a mask that is to cover
• 18:12
  up the true fear that we will feel inadequate, that we will
• 18:17
  feel judged, that we will feel rejected.
• 18:19
  OK, so if for example, you have imposter syndrome, it's
• 18:24
  basically telling you that you don't belong here.
• 18:27
  And also with that that you're going to be exposed.
• 18:29
  I again, speaking for some reason has been one of the
• 18:32
  things that I've learned a lot of confidence over in the last
• 18:34
  little bit. It's been the most confronting,
• 18:36
  most obviously confronting for me.
• 18:39
  And I remember I went to go speak at an event and there was
• 18:43
  another speaker and I said to him, I am I'm like freaking out
• 18:48
  that I have to go on stage with this person because he to me, I
• 18:52
  said to him, you are like the Jeff Bezos of marketing.
• 18:55
  He's an incredible marketer. And because of that, I was also
• 18:59
  going on stage to talk about marketing before his talk on
• 19:02
  marketing. Great.
• 19:04
  So here I am, somebody who I would consider in comparison to
• 19:06
  him is like a baby entrepreneur. And I have to go on and I have
• 19:10
  to talk about marketing at this event.
• 19:12
  And so I remember I had insane imposter syndrome.
• 19:14
  Like I was like, who the heck am I to talk about this?
• 19:17
  Who's going to listen to me? Why does anyone even care what I
• 19:20
  have to say when he's going to be on stage?
• 19:22
  And it was because of the time I basically believed, and I had
• 19:28
  this deep rooted belief that when I got on stage and he got
• 19:31
  on stage, people were going to see the contrast between our two
• 19:34
  points of view and our two topics.
• 19:37
  And with that, start to realize that I don't belong here.
• 19:41
  And basically that I didn't belong on stage or that I didn't
• 19:43
  have enough value to contribute to warrant my place on like the
• 19:49
  roster that day. And I thought, they're going to
• 19:52
  listen to me. And then an hour and a half
• 19:54
  later, they're going to listen to him and they're going to
• 19:55
  realize I don't know anything compared to him.
• 19:59
  And this is how I felt. This isn't me.
• 20:00
  It was true. This is how it felt.
• 20:02
  And so I remember saying that to him and he said, I actually
• 20:06
  don't know if you saw me, but I took notes on your presentation
• 20:10
  and I'm like, notes on what? And he's like, you talk about
• 20:14
  different stuff in marketing. You have a different level of
• 20:16
  skill and mastery than I do in areas that I just don't have.
• 20:19
  So I took notes on the resources you shared and some of the
• 20:22
  frameworks that you taught today.
• 20:24
  And I said to him, I was so nervous to present in front of
• 20:27
  you because I know the level of expertise and education and
• 20:31
  impact basically that you have. And I remember he said to me, he
• 20:34
  said, listen, you're not nervous because you don't deserve to be
• 20:38
  up there. You're nervous because you care.
• 20:41
  And I remember that shifted everything for me because what
• 20:44
  it meant is I really cared that the audience and the person
• 20:48
  listening to me got value. I didn't really necessarily care
• 20:51
  about people's perceptions and not nugget that he gave changed
• 20:55
  everything because it meant when I then went to go speak in front
• 20:58
  of people who might be, you know, call it quote UN quote,
• 21:02
  more qualified than me. Maybe they've been in business,
• 21:05
  you know, 2 decades longer than me.
• 21:07
  Maybe they are somebody who has AI, don't know almost 8 figure
• 21:11
  company and I'm going in and I'm talking to their communities.
• 21:14
  It's not because I have imposter syndrome because I don't belong.
• 21:17
  It's actually a matter of the fact that I care about the
• 21:19
  people in the audience and what they need to hear to feel value
• 21:23
  and to feel impacted. And so I want to note from this
• 21:26
  is that when you're struggling with being confident, I want you
• 21:31
  to give yourself a little break and recognize that you've had a
• 21:35
  lot of beliefs that have been given to you about when you're
• 21:38
  allowed to be confident or when the right time is to be
• 21:41
  confident. It could be that again, from
• 21:44
  society, you've been told you should only be confident when
• 21:48
  you know you're confident. But make sure you're humble and
• 21:50
  you're confident, but don't take up too much space and you're
• 21:53
  confident, but don't be too loud and too much of a presence in
• 21:56
  the room, right? So we have that impact.
• 21:58
  We've got the school system that taught us when you should be
• 22:01
  confident, which is basically when things were correct, right?
• 22:04
  So we had this ingrained belief that if we got things correct,
• 22:08
  then we had everything we needed to feel confident about the
• 22:11
  thing that we were doing or moving forward.
• 22:13
  And then you've got, you know, these past experiences of
• 22:16
  moments when you maybe thought you felt confident and you
• 22:19
  initially going in were really, you know, gung ho about it.
• 22:22
  And then by the end of it, you felt rejected and you felt
• 22:25
  dismissed or you felt that it didn't go the way that you
• 22:28
  wanted and it questioned whether in the future you should be
• 22:30
  confident in yourself again. And so we carry all of this with
• 22:34
  us. And so this bleeds into our
• 22:36
  business every single day. And frankly, it probably bleeds
• 22:40
  into other things in your personal life every single day.
• 22:43
  And so we want to ask ourselves, what is the cost of lack of
• 22:49
  confidence? Like, what is it actually?
• 22:51
  And having these, you know, maybe deep beliefs in you
• 22:55
  somewhere that we haven't maybe unpacked yet or we haven't taken
• 22:58
  time to really unravel. What is that actually creating
• 23:02
  in you? What is that causing you within
• 23:05
  the business? What's it costing you?
• 23:06
  And so I want to break down some of the things that I note that
• 23:10
  this costs women when it comes to seeing the lack of confidence
• 23:14
  in their business. One of them is definitely by far
• 23:17
  people who have a lot of missed opportunity for revenue.
• 23:21
  I see people who miss out on revenue of launches, They miss
• 23:24
  out on promoting an offer, They miss out on, you know, putting
• 23:28
  something out to the world or even selling something because
• 23:30
  there's this belief that it needs more work, it needs to be
• 23:33
  perfected more, It just needs a little bit more time.
• 23:36
  And that's really, again, because we lack the confidence
• 23:39
  to put it out and to open ourselves to judgement.
• 23:42
  When I see somebody that I work with who is constantly, you
• 23:46
  know, I just want to do a little bit more to the emails, I want
• 23:48
  to go a little bit back to the content and I just want to do
• 23:50
  one more round of feedback. And like they're constantly kind
• 23:52
  of in this, this feedback loop. They think, and you may think
• 23:58
  that feedback is this belief of, Oh, well, I really care about
• 24:01
  the product and I'm making it really good.
• 24:04
  Well, there's also a very fine line between you're making a
• 24:07
  good product or you're making a good piece of marketing.
• 24:10
  And then there's the conversation of is that actually
• 24:13
  bottlenecking you from progress? And if it is, that's more in the
• 24:16
  perfectionism territory, which really means that you are
• 24:20
  constantly obsessing over making something perfect because
• 24:24
  otherwise you have to face the potential of rejection or the
• 24:27
  potential of being dismissed in some capacity.
• 24:31
  And that in itself scares you. So because of that, you miss out
• 24:34
  on potential revenue that could come into your business.
• 24:36
  I also see people who are drastically under pricing
• 24:39
  themselves because you don't actually truly believe in your
• 24:43
  value. You don't feel confident in
• 24:45
  truly who you are and what you provide and what you can do for
• 24:49
  a client. And so because of that, you have
• 24:51
  been told by reinforced outside things, meaning you go to pitch
• 24:56
  your price, you say I'm going to charge $2500 for this package a
• 25:00
  month or I'm going to charge $5000 a month for this package.
• 25:04
  And you've had a couple people who you've talked to who have
• 25:06
  not gone through with that, who have quote UN quote rejected
• 25:09
  that price. So what you do is you
• 25:12
  internalize that and you say to yourself, oh, we'll see.
• 25:14
  People don't see my value at this dollar.
• 25:17
  So I'm going to keep myself small at this current price
• 25:20
  point because that's what everyone else is comfortable
• 25:21
  with. And this goes back to our idea
• 25:24
  of being bold, taking up space. What would it look like if you
• 25:29
  actually committed to charging the price that you've already
• 25:32
  been ruminating on upping your prices too?
• 25:35
  And I know that because I talked to every single entrepreneur
• 25:38
  who's like, yeah, I'd really like to get my pricing to here.
• 25:40
  And I'm like, great, why? What's the disconnect?
• 25:42
  Why are we not there? What would need to happen for
• 25:44
  that to get there? And the interesting part is
• 25:47
  often times they find all these other things because really what
• 25:50
  you're looking for in creating refinements to your offer or
• 25:54
  you're creating refinements to something else.
• 25:56
  You feel the need to tweak something.
• 25:57
  The reason you're doing that is because you're trying to give
• 26:00
  yourself evidence. You're trying to give yourself
• 26:02
  reason enough to say, oh, now I can increase my price.
• 26:06
  Now I have a reason to be confident again.
• 26:09
  Let's remember going back to I get it correct.
• 26:12
  If I get all the correct pieces in place, then I have what I
• 26:16
  need to increase my price. That's the problem is that we
• 26:21
  are believing that everything needs to be in a certain place
• 26:24
  before we can do something about it.
• 26:27
  I'm also seeing this in burnout. When I work with entrepreneurs
• 26:34
  who are burnt out and even myself.
• 26:36
  I will be honest, this was how this showed up for me and how
• 26:39
  the confidence kind of snuck its way into my business when I was
• 26:43
  really burnt out. It was because I was
• 26:45
  overcompensating. And that was because I didn't
• 26:48
  believe that unless I was like completely just like breaking my
• 26:53
  back for people in every single moment that I was enough.
• 26:56
  I wasn't allowed to have space. I wasn't allowed to have
• 27:00
  boundaries because I believed that my value, it wasn't quote
• 27:03
  UN quote over delivering. And So what it did is it broke
• 27:07
  me because it basically meant that I was getting my confidence
• 27:11
  from all of these people praising me and reinforcing to
• 27:14
  me that they were happy with my over delivering.
• 27:17
  And So what ended up happening? Is it reinforced?
• 27:20
  OK, great. This is where I get my feedback.
• 27:21
  This is where I get my validation.
• 27:23
  So what did it do? It caused me to learn more and
• 27:26
  more into over delivering. It caused me to go and learn
• 27:30
  more into extra hours and extra support and extra calls and
• 27:34
  extra accommodations. And that was not because the
• 27:37
  clients needed it. It's not because I even really
• 27:41
  in fact needed to offer that. It was because it gave me a
• 27:46
  level of confidence from them that I was good and that they
• 27:49
  were rating reviews. And so because of that, I
• 27:52
  couldn't handle at that time the rejection or the dismissal of
• 27:59
  anyone having a single issue with me.
• 28:01
  So what I did is I overcompensated so aggressively
• 28:05
  to give myself any aspect of confidence.
• 28:07
  And that was because no one could possibly say a bad thing
• 28:09
  about me, my service, my brand if I busted my butt and every
• 28:13
  customer was right in every moment.
• 28:16
  And so burnout can also come from over delivering.
• 28:19
  And that's to really ultimately make up for a lack of
• 28:21
  confidence. And the other thing that I see
• 28:25
  with scaling businesses specifically is that they will
• 28:28
  get their business to a place and then they plateau.
• 28:31
  And that is because they are so comfortable in a certain stage
• 28:36
  where they're at and they can't fathom the confidence they need
• 28:40
  or the perception they need or the identity that they need to
• 28:42
  get to that next level. They don't.
• 28:44
  They just don't really see who they would need to become or
• 28:47
  they don't really see what's needed to tap into that next
• 28:51
  level of success. And So what it means is you end
• 28:55
  up behind the scenes because if you have to step forward, if you
• 28:58
  have to step up in order to in, you know, step up your business
• 29:02
  to increase your business, it means you're gonna have to be
• 29:04
  seen. It means you're going to have to
• 29:06
  really be putting yourself out there.
• 29:09
  And again, that takes a level of confidence.
• 29:11
  And So what people do is they stay where it's safe and they
• 29:15
  have a business that's at a certain revenue level where they
• 29:18
  feel like they can easily generate, for example, leads and
• 29:20
  sales there. And they take that and they,
• 29:23
  they hang out there, they hang out at that plateau, They hang
• 29:26
  out at that level because that's the place where confidence is
• 29:31
  not tested. And once the confidence gets
• 29:35
  tested, that that next level of your business and you know what
• 29:38
  that is for you, that next thing that you're being called to do,
• 29:42
  that next offer, that next way of showing up as a brand, that
• 29:44
  next way of showing up maybe differently as a leader, it
• 29:47
  could be with your team, you're being called to a new level of
• 29:52
  the way that you show up as a leader in any of those buckets.
• 29:56
  And because that stretches you, it requires a level of
• 29:59
  confidence from you. And because you have to flex
• 30:02
  that confidence muscle, you're not doing it, which causes you
• 30:05
  to stay in the plateau of where your business is at today.
• 30:08
  So there's the tangible cost in the business that we see, but
• 30:12
  there's also the intangible, which is the fact that you will
• 30:16
  lose self trust. OK.
• 30:20
  So every time you break a promise to yourself that you're
• 30:24
  going to go for it, like have you ever had those moments where
• 30:26
  you're like, I'm just going to do that scary thing and I'm just
• 30:29
  going to put myself out there and I'm just going to really
• 30:32
  step into that next level. And then you go and you're
• 30:35
  close. And maybe again, back to the
• 30:37
  price point, maybe you have a sales call coming up and you're
• 30:40
  like, this is a call that I'm going to pitch this new price
• 30:43
  and I'm going to step into this new level of basically
• 30:45
  compensation for me and for my business.
• 30:48
  And then the call happens and the call is there and before you
• 30:51
  know it, you are like, I can't pitch this price and I don't
• 30:54
  feel confident this price. And this is not the right move
• 30:56
  for me. And you start to get overwhelmed
• 30:57
  and you retreat. You lose self trust when you go
• 31:01
  for certain things and you don't commit and you don't see
• 31:04
  yourself commit to the things that you once said you cared
• 31:06
  about. What it does is it actually
• 31:09
  creates a lack of trust within yourself.
• 31:12
  One of the fastest ways to create confidence for anybody is
• 31:15
  to actually set a commitment to yourself and to follow through
• 31:18
  with it. Because what it does is it
• 31:20
  reinforces in your identity that you were the kind of person who
• 31:23
  keeps commitments that you make not only to other people but
• 31:26
  also to yourself. And so connected is also this
• 31:31
  other aspect by not flexing this, this confidence muscle of
• 31:34
  the erosion of yourself worth because you know that you are
• 31:39
  deferring your potential. OK, so I want to take a quick
• 31:42
  little brief interruption from today's episode to let you know
• 31:45
  about something really exciting. And I want to 1st preface, there
• 31:48
  is nothing here that I have to sell you.
• 31:49
  This is about something that is entirely free that I think would
• 31:52
  be a massive support for you if you are someone who's loving all
• 31:56
  things ambitious podcast. So we have created an absolutely
• 32:00
  incredible community that is called the Ambitious Network.
• 32:03
  This is really a place where coaching and masterminds meet
• 32:05
  high level networking of other women who were just like you.
• 32:09
  So a little bit of what you can anticipate, this is a place for
• 32:11
  you to grow, to connect, and ultimately to get the support
• 32:14
  that you need to elevate your business.
• 32:16
  And so some of the things you can anticipate inside #1 live
• 32:19
  Hot Seat Coaching. This is literally live coaching
• 32:22
  in the way that I would do inside of our masterminds, our
• 32:24
  different offers only inside of this community, entirely free.
• 32:27
  You'll also get the opportunity to get access to exclusive
• 32:30
  giveaways that are not available anywhere else.
• 32:32
  So these are things like giveaways of different books and
• 32:35
  resources that I'm obsessed with that have really helped me in my
• 32:38
  journey of business, but also things on a larger scale, like
• 32:41
  some of which have been six months of private coaching type
• 32:45
  of giveaways. So all of this to be said,
• 32:47
  massive, massive amount of resources being given inside and
• 32:50
  also trainings and resources, tools of frameworks and
• 32:54
  downloads and worksheets and master classes that are going to
• 32:57
  be things that will really help to take you and your business to
• 32:59
  the next level. Now, it's also not just about
• 33:01
  me. I have an incredible network and
• 33:03
  a community of other entrepreneurs who also want to
• 33:06
  give back to you if you've loved their interviews and their
• 33:09
  discussions on the Ambitious podcast.
• 33:10
  So we have guests that are also providing resources in the
• 33:13
  community that will only be available inside the ambitious
• 33:16
  network. But there's also the networking
• 33:18
  aspect. And this is a place for you to
• 33:20
  not Only Connect with other women about what's going on in
• 33:23
  your business, what's currently working or not working in
• 33:25
  today's current market. It's a place to share wins, but
• 33:28
  it's also a place to connect with me and get my feedback and
• 33:31
  support for you and your business.
• 33:33
  Now all of that to be said, this is a, as I said, mastermind
• 33:37
  meets networking. And I really have created this
• 33:40
  as a community that I want to be something you've never gotten
• 33:43
  anywhere else. It's not this low ticket
• 33:45
  membership that you feel like you're paying for.
• 33:47
  You know, this graveyard of resources that the person has
• 33:50
  they don't know what to do with. And it's also not that Facebook
• 33:52
  group that you're inside of that you feel like you get tons of
• 33:55
  notifications, but you don't really want anything that's
• 33:56
  inside of it. It all feels surface level.
• 33:58
  We want to give you the ability to have mastermind meets high
• 34:02
  level networking all in one place.
• 34:04
  And the ambitious network is where you're going to find that.
• 34:06
  So how you can get inside? If you want to go to the show
• 34:09
  notes beneath, you can click a link to join join us inside the
• 34:12
  ambitious network. And if you also want to connect
• 34:14
  with me on Instagram, I'm also happy to chat with you about it.
• 34:17
  So if you DM me the word ambitious, we'll be sure to chat
• 34:19
  a little bit more about the network for you and give you the
• 34:22
  link to get inside. So all of that to be said, I
• 34:24
  don't want to take any more time away from today's episode with.
• 34:27
  So without further ado, let's get back into the show.
• 34:29
  I don't know if you've ever felt this way, but I I know there's
• 34:33
  certain aspects of my life. For me, this bucket is health
• 34:36
  like I can push in business no problemo like I have no problem
• 34:41
  doing the scary thing, spending the big money, taking the big
• 34:44
  action, being seen all of that in business to me, easy peasy.
• 34:48
  But the interesting thing is in health for some reason, meaning
• 34:51
  like with my fitness, with my nutrition, that part for me is
• 34:56
  where I constantly feel like I'm deferring my potential.
• 35:01
  And so for me, that's something that I'm working on a lot right
• 35:03
  now in the season of my life, which is to not defer my
• 35:06
  potential. So what I mean by that is
• 35:10
  there's an area in your life right now where you know you
• 35:13
  could be playing bigger. There's an area in your life
• 35:16
  right now that you know you have more potential and you're not
• 35:19
  even close to where you know you could be.
• 35:22
  There's an area in your life where you have a goal and it's
• 35:26
  so crystal clear who you could be and how you could do it and
• 35:28
  what it would look like. But you're terrified because
• 35:32
  there's a certain level of confidence that we need to come
• 35:34
  from the belief to go for it. There's a certain level of
• 35:37
  confidence that would be needed in the actions that you take to
• 35:40
  go achieve it. And there's a certain confidence
• 35:42
  in yourself that you could do it.
• 35:47
  And So what ends up happening is we know and we're so crystal
• 35:51
  clear on this level of potential of who we could be, and yet we
• 35:56
  don't go for it. Why?
• 35:59
  And that's because of confidence.
• 36:01
  We lack confidence in could be the belief, could be the
• 36:04
  actions, could be the outcomes. But what that does is when we
• 36:08
  know our potential and we don't have the confidence to really go
• 36:11
  for it, but we're still deeply aware that we could be bigger.
• 36:14
  We could be doing and moving and executing in bigger ways.
• 36:18
  It erodes our self trust it completely piece by piece,
• 36:23
  moment by moment, decision by decision, belief by belief
• 36:26
  erodes the trust you have in yourself.
• 36:29
  And as a business owner, what that does is it causes you to
• 36:32
  lack trust in other areas. If you know that you have
• 36:36
  potential to do something and you have all the resources to go
• 36:38
  into it to achieve it, but it would mean you had to apply
• 36:40
  yourself and you don't, That sits with you in a way.
• 36:44
  And I don't know about you, but I feel like for me with my
• 36:48
  fitness journey, I got to a place where I was like, enough
• 36:50
  is enough. Like if you have this potential
• 36:52
  to go do this, one of the things I recognize is like, there's no
• 36:56
  one coming to save me but myself.
• 36:58
  So like I was having an internal battle with me because I'm just
• 37:01
  like, I wanted to just eat clean and I wanted to move my body.
• 37:06
  And I knew that I could have a certain level of strength.
• 37:08
  I knew I could have a certain level of fitness.
• 37:10
  I knew I could have a certain level of aesthetics.
• 37:12
  And I was like, listen, I can't go for this because it just
• 37:16
  meant that I was going to show up in a confidence in my belief
• 37:19
  and a confidence in my execution every single day.
• 37:22
  And I wasn't ready to do that. But what it did is it killed my
• 37:26
  mindset because it instead left me with the guilt of knowing
• 37:29
  what I could be and who I could become and what I could achieve,
• 37:32
  and also consciously not actually doing that because it
• 37:36
  crushed my trust in myself. And so the other thing that that
• 37:40
  creates is also the fact that you have resentment and you have
• 37:45
  regret. And sometimes this is within
• 37:47
  yourself, but sometimes this is also within others.
• 37:50
  Like have you ever watched someone again?
• 37:52
  I feel like for some reason for me, this doesn't show up as much
• 37:55
  in the business world, but it shows up in the fitness space
• 37:57
  for me. I feel like I would watch people
• 37:59
  who would go live these these healthy lifestyles.
• 38:01
  Or for you, you might be watching someone who's crushing
• 38:03
  it in business and you're seeing people do what you want to do.
• 38:06
  And you're seeing people have the life that you want to have.
• 38:09
  And you feel resentment and you feel this like regret that you
• 38:14
  didn't take the action or you felt this regret that you didn't
• 38:17
  live bolder or you felt this, you know, resentment that you
• 38:20
  wish that could be you. And what that is, is because
• 38:24
  you're watching other people when you really distill it down,
• 38:27
  take risks that you fully know you're capable of.
• 38:32
  And that's where I got with the health and fitness.
• 38:34
  I got to this place where I was sick of watching, you know,
• 38:37
  myself have the same goal every year for my birthday.
• 38:40
  I'm like, this is the year that I'm going to be the most fit.
• 38:43
  And I'm like, great. That was my goal three years
• 38:44
  ago. And I got so frustrated with
• 38:47
  myself and I got so frustrated watching other people do in six
• 38:51
  months sometimes what I had been trying to do in three years.
• 38:55
  And so there became this level of frustration that caused me to
• 38:59
  be like, enough is enough. You have this level of
• 39:02
  potential. You have this level of who you
• 39:04
  could be and how you could show up and how you could take space,
• 39:06
  and you're not doing it. Why?
• 39:10
  Why? And so when I sat with that, it
• 39:13
  really became I was disconnected from the deeper vision.
• 39:18
  I was disconnected from my true potential.
• 39:22
  And I did it intentionally because when we have this
• 39:24
  awareness of who we could be and when we don't tap into it
• 39:28
  enough, it starts to become as distant vision, right when we're
• 39:31
  really tapped into our potential and we're really clear on what
• 39:34
  we want and how we want it. I don't know about you, but I've
• 39:36
  had these moments where I'm so crystal clear in my vision of
• 39:40
  what I want for my life and for my business that I'm like, go,
• 39:42
  go, go, go, go, go, go. Like I just, I just, as I said,
• 39:46
  run through a wall because I'm just so committed to it.
• 39:50
  But when our vision is outside of us, when our vision is
• 39:52
  distant from us, when our potential is out there, it's not
• 39:55
  here. It's out there and it's not too
• 39:58
  close for me to have to really see and face.
• 40:01
  It means that it becomes easier for us to not take risk.
• 40:05
  It becomes easier for us to not do the big bold thing because it
• 40:08
  feels like this distant thing that's out there.
• 40:10
  I don't have to worry about it right now.
• 40:11
  And what I realized was when I started to really connect to my
• 40:15
  vision, when I connected to who I want to be my potential, IE.
• 40:19
  Physically think about bringing your vision closer to you,
• 40:21
  bringing your potential closer to you.
• 40:23
  And what that looks like is talking about it every day,
• 40:26
  thinking about it every day, looking at who you could be and
• 40:29
  what it would look like and how would you operate in the beliefs
• 40:32
  you'd have. When you live in parallel with
• 40:36
  your vision, with your potential every day, you're also going to
• 40:40
  find that you cannot play it safe as much because it's so
• 40:45
  close to you. We play safe often times because
• 40:48
  we believe that our vision, our potential is out there.
• 40:51
  It's in this distant thing in the future.
• 40:53
  It's in two years, it's in three years, it's in 20 years of what
• 40:55
  I'm going to do. But what if you embodied that
• 40:57
  today? And what if you got closer to
• 40:59
  that today? What would that look like if you
• 41:02
  lived your life in parallel with your potential every day?
• 41:07
  And as soon as you start to feel that distance of it getting
• 41:09
  away, you pulled it closer again and you got right back in tune
• 41:12
  with it. What is the vision?
• 41:14
  What are the beliefs? What are the actions?
• 41:17
  And that helps you to not get into this rut of playing it
• 41:20
  safe. And So what we want to really
• 41:24
  unpack as entrepreneurs and again, for anything you're
• 41:26
  trying to achieve in your life is that you can actually be
• 41:30
  competent to do something, but still lack confidence to do it.
• 41:37
  And I want to be very crystal clear about this.
• 41:39
  You can have competence to do something.
• 41:42
  You can have the capability of doing something, but still lack
• 41:46
  the confidence to do it. And this is where most high
• 41:51
  achieving, most high level, you know, ambitious women are
• 41:54
  getting stuck is the fact that you have competence and you have
• 41:59
  capabilities in certain areas in your life, in your business, but
• 42:03
  you lack confidence to do it. You lack confidence to show up
• 42:08
  in that way. And because of that, you're
• 42:10
  holding yourself back. Competence, the capability is a
• 42:15
  skill. Confidence is self trust.
• 42:20
  OK, so I'm going to just really slow it down for you.
• 42:23
  Competence, your capability is a skill, many of which I will tell
• 42:28
  you right now you have that you are not using.
• 42:31
  And the reason you're not using those skills, the reason you're
• 42:34
  not using those capabilities in your business, in your life is
• 42:37
  because you lack confidence. And what that means is that you
• 42:41
  have the skill, but you don't have the self trust to actually
• 42:45
  do something with it. And that's why you're lacking
• 42:49
  the results in your life and the results in your business because
• 42:53
  you playing small, you not taking up more space and you not
• 42:56
  going for the big thing and achieving these massive goals
• 42:58
  and ambitions is not because you don't have the capability.
• 43:01
  It's not because you don't have the competence.
• 43:03
  It's because you don't truly at your core.
• 43:06
  And this is the first step is literally understanding us and
• 43:08
  having an awareness of it. I don't have the self trust.
• 43:11
  Like for me with my health journey, I knew the macros like
• 43:15
  I knew what to eat. I mean, I literally used to
• 43:17
  write workout plans. I knew the workout plan, I knew
• 43:20
  the macros, I knew all of these things.
• 43:22
  I had the skill. It wasn't a matter of me not
• 43:24
  having the blueprint. It wasn't a matter of me, well,
• 43:26
  how much protein do I eat? That was not the reason that I
• 43:30
  wasn't fit. It was because I didn't actually
• 43:33
  trust myself to follow through. I didn't actually trust myself
• 43:37
  to succeed. I didn't trust myself to be able
• 43:40
  to navigate what happens if it didn't work.
• 43:43
  What happens if I didn't make the progress the way that I
• 43:45
  wanted to? I didn't trust myself to take
• 43:49
  the journey. Confidence is not a matter of
• 43:53
  you waiting for all these skills to get to a certain place and
• 43:57
  then we move. It's not a matter of you waiting
• 43:59
  for all these capabilities and all this competence to read a
• 44:03
  certain place before you do. Because the thing that we know
• 44:07
  is that we have to bridge the gap.
• 44:09
  So the confidence gap, as we talked about earlier, we have to
• 44:12
  bridge the gap through evidence building.
• 44:14
  And basically what it means is that confidence is not the
• 44:20
  absence of fear, it is about the presence of trust.
• 44:24
  OK, So confidence is not about the absence of fear, it is about
• 44:31
  the presence of trust. And I will tell you that
• 44:37
  perspective has been the heart of so many things in my entire
• 44:44
  business. The first step in starting this
• 44:46
  business, I had zero evidence. I was be.
• 44:50
  I could have focused beyond fear.
• 44:53
  And I'd really had to lean to the fact that I had to trust
• 44:55
  myself that I was going to find a way to do it.
• 44:57
  I was going to find a way to make it work.
• 44:58
  I was going to find a way to create movement.
• 45:00
  It wasn't about the fact that I had also all of the competence.
• 45:05
  I really, in some areas probably didn't have a lot of competence.
• 45:08
  But what I did is I had trust in myself.
• 45:10
  I knew I was a hard worker. I knew I would figure out
• 45:12
  problems. I knew I'd overcome adversity in
• 45:15
  the past. I'd found a way along the way to
• 45:17
  make it happen and that I found a way to move through it.
• 45:21
  And with that, I realized that I am never not going to be scared.
• 45:26
  And this is, I think, the biggest misconception around
• 45:29
  when people say to themselves, you know, well, how do I tap
• 45:31
  into that? And people ask me, how do you
• 45:32
  become so confident to do what you do or to, like invent new
• 45:36
  things or to show up in the way that you do?
• 45:38
  And I tell people every day, it has nothing to do with lack of
• 45:41
  fear. I'm scared all the time, like
• 45:45
  all the time. I want to be very clear.
• 45:47
  I don't not fear in my business. I fear things all the time.
• 45:50
  I fear being judged. I fear being rejected.
• 45:53
  I fear failure. I fear, you know, making the
• 45:57
  wrong move. I fear the impact of what it
• 45:59
  will do for me or for the people on our team or any of that.
• 46:02
  I feel, I fear all of that, but underneath it all, I trust
• 46:07
  myself. I trust myself to navigate it,
• 46:11
  and I trust myself that even if everything completely burned to
• 46:14
  the ground, I will be fine. I trust myself to be able to
• 46:19
  adapt along the way and to learn things that will help and become
• 46:23
  the skills that I need to help me to do what I need to do.
• 46:26
  And I also trust that I have to be in a constant place of
• 46:30
  learning and sometimes learning something means that you have to
• 46:36
  be able to feel scared and do it anyway.
• 46:39
  Think back to when you were a kid and you learned how to swim.
• 46:42
  I remember going to swimming lessons, they would like line us
• 46:44
  all up in our like little floaties and, and whatever on
• 46:47
  the side of the pool. And they would say we want you
• 46:50
  to jump into the water and like the water was like 5 feet deep.
• 46:53
  Obviously I'm a munchkin at this point, right?
• 46:55
  But I remember the, the water was like 5-6 feet deep and it
• 46:59
  felt like the biggest thing or like going down when you were a
• 47:03
  little kid on the slide felt like, Oh my God, I'm so scared
• 47:06
  and you're so crazy nervous and fearful.
• 47:10
  And then you do it and you get again, you trust yourself to
• 47:14
  just 321 go down the slide or 321 jump off and do the dive
• 47:18
  into the pool and you do it and you go to the slide.
• 47:21
  And what's the first thing you do once you pop up out of that
• 47:23
  water, you're like again, because what you've done in that
• 47:27
  moment is you created this loop of I feel fear.
• 47:31
  I have self trust that I will navigate it.
• 47:34
  I believe in me. I don't believe in the
• 47:35
  situation. I don't believe in all these
• 47:37
  other stories. I don't believe in all these
• 47:39
  different scenarios. But what I do believe in is me.
• 47:42
  And then you go and you do when you act, and I will tell you 9
• 47:46
  times out of 10, you're going to get evidence that's going to
• 47:48
  help you to be like, again, back on the slide, back for another
• 47:53
  dive into the pool. You start to build confidence
• 47:56
  because you did the thing. But what most entrepreneurs want
• 47:59
  to do is they want to bypass that whole process.
• 48:02
  You're like, no, no, I want to have a prediction before I go
• 48:06
  down the slide of what's going to feel like, how it's going to
• 48:09
  go, What would the water feel like?
• 48:11
  And how am I going to feel after I'm done?
• 48:13
  I want the entire experience broken down.
• 48:15
  For me, that's not how this works.
• 48:17
  And if you are waiting for someone to break that down for
• 48:20
  you, then you are going to constantly stay stuck in your
• 48:23
  business and you're going to frankly stay constantly stuck
• 48:26
  within your life. One of the best skills that I
• 48:28
  learned was to trust myself. And so back to my speaking
• 48:31
  experience that I mentioned I when I first went on stage to do
• 48:37
  speaking. I've told the story before, I'm
• 48:39
  pretty sure. If not, this might be the first
• 48:41
  time you're hearing it. I the first time that I got
• 48:43
  asked to speak, I remember truly like wanting to fake COVID
• 48:47
  because I was so nervous. And again, fear just all over my
• 48:53
  body. I literally thought I was going
• 48:54
  to poop my pants. I was so nervous.
• 48:57
  My stomach turned as it does when you get nervous.
• 48:59
  I started to sweat. I was like my heart literally
• 49:02
  felt like they beat out of my chest and they Call My Name and
• 49:06
  they're OK. Like welcome Kate Perkovic to
• 49:07
  the stage. And I'm like, and I go up and I
• 49:10
  blacked out. I blacked out and I don't even
• 49:13
  know what I said. I have no idea what I thought.
• 49:16
  I have no idea what I said. I just like was not present in
• 49:18
  any way because I was so full of anxiety and fear.
• 49:21
  And I get off that stage still kind of in blackout to be
• 49:25
  honest, not really in tune with my body just yet.
• 49:27
  And I get off of stage and everyone's like that was amazing
• 49:30
  at just my notes. And I remember we went on our
• 49:33
  first break and I had a line of people who came up and started
• 49:36
  asking me questions. And it was the most like, weird,
• 49:41
  humbling experience because I was like, who wants to listen to
• 49:43
  me? Why am I on the stage?
• 49:45
  Why am I credible? Does this make sense?
• 49:48
  And yet here is all this evidence to say that what I
• 49:52
  feared the most, the thing that I was so terrified to do.
• 49:55
  I have all this evidence now after it's done telling me that
• 49:58
  it was great and it was amazing and I crushed it and all of
• 50:02
  these things. And so when that happened, I
• 50:05
  took that and I sat with it and I really integrated it because I
• 50:08
  realized I'm going to get asked to be on another stage again.
• 50:11
  And when I do, I'm going to feel so nervous and all these
• 50:14
  feelings are going to come up again.
• 50:16
  But I'm going to anchor into the fact that this is what I trust.
• 50:19
  I trust myself to navigate. I trust myself to do the hard
• 50:22
  thing. I trust myself that regardless
• 50:24
  of how it goes, I'm still going to show up and I'm going to do
• 50:26
  it. I, I trust myself that I'm not
• 50:29
  going to try to, you know, retreat that again, classic
• 50:32
  fight or flight was like, I was like, get me the heck out of
• 50:34
  here. I don't want to do public
• 50:35
  speaking. Never mind.
• 50:37
  I changed my mind and I remember doing it.
• 50:40
  I said, like to myself, I had to trust myself that when I want to
• 50:43
  run, I have to run toward the thing that I'm terrified of
• 50:46
  because that day taught me that. That day taught me that if I had
• 50:49
  ran that day, I would have missed out on an incredible
• 50:52
  experience. I would have missed out on an
• 50:54
  amazing impact for an incredible room of people and I would have
• 50:58
  missed out on something that I really ultimately deep down
• 51:00
  wanted and that was my potential.
• 51:03
  Fast forward, I've since then spoken at many different events.
• 51:07
  And with that, I remember the next stage that I went on to,
• 51:10
  same feeling happened. The feeling started in my chest
• 51:15
  and I start to have this sweating feeling and I start to
• 51:17
  have these nerves. I'm like, OK, here it is, here
• 51:20
  it is again. Remember back.
• 51:22
  It's not the absence of fear. It's about the presence of
• 51:24
  trust. And so I'm in this moment and
• 51:27
  I'm having this. Oh my gosh.
• 51:28
  OK, here's the fear again. Here's the fear again.
• 51:30
  And everything my body is like, don't do it.
• 51:32
  Ask if you can make it shorter, like do anything basically to
• 51:35
  fight or flight. I was out, I was flight, I was
• 51:37
  out of there. And I was like, I got to get out
• 51:40
  of here. I got to get out of here.
• 51:41
  And I said, remember, trust yourself.
• 51:43
  You had this last time, you crushed it.
• 51:45
  You have this this time, and you're going to crush it.
• 51:48
  And there are so many things that could tell me that that
• 51:51
  wouldn't be the case because the the next speaking event that I
• 51:53
  went to, they asked me to speak about my personal story.
• 51:56
  And I had never been that vulnerable in front of a room of
• 51:58
  people that I didn't know. And so because of that, I was
• 52:00
  like, Oh my God, this is a whole, this is different.
• 52:02
  This is different. I made all these reasons why it
• 52:04
  wasn't the same, but the trust in myself is the difference
• 52:10
  because I use scary shit all the time now.
• 52:13
  I do scary things with certain price points.
• 52:15
  I do scary things with putting myself out there.
• 52:17
  I do scary things like sharing the ending of a long term
• 52:22
  relationship and leaving an engagement on social media.
• 52:24
  That was terrifying for me, terrifying for me.
• 52:29
  And the fear was there. But I'm like, I trust myself
• 52:32
  that this is the right thing that I need to do because I
• 52:33
  trust myself that I want to be connected to my audience and I
• 52:37
  want to be real and I don't want to be inauthentic right now.
• 52:40
  And so I trusted myself to share that.
• 52:41
  And again, the response even from that of so many amazing
• 52:43
  women that I connected with was only because I trusted myself.
• 52:47
  So again, it's not about the absence of fear.
• 52:51
  It is about the presence of self trust to do the hard thing.
• 52:54
  And I want you just take a second right now and ask
• 52:56
  yourself, what is that thing? What is that thing for you right
• 53:00
  now that you know you want to do, you know you have potential
• 53:04
  to become or to do you have something in your heart on your
• 53:09
  mind right now that you know is the next level of your potential
• 53:13
  and you're not doing it. And frankly, that's because
• 53:17
  you're scared. And there's a many, there's a
• 53:20
  lot of different reasons why you can be scared, but truthfully,
• 53:22
  none of that matters. What I want you to instead ask
• 53:26
  yourself is even with all those things being true, even if you
• 53:29
  gave me, you're like, Kate, I'm going to give you 75 reasons why
• 53:32
  this is terrifying. I shouldn't do it.
• 53:33
  OK, great. I'm going to listen to all
• 53:35
  those. I'm going to say, OK, amazing.
• 53:36
  And do you trust yourself to navigate it?
• 53:40
  Do you trust yourself to make a decision?
• 53:43
  Can you at the end of the day, be left with yourself and feel
• 53:46
  like I got me? And if you do, and if you can,
• 53:51
  then that's the invitation that now is the time to move.
• 53:55
  You're waiting for that list of 75 things to go away before you
• 53:58
  take action. And I'm here to tell you,
• 53:59
  they're not going to go away. They're always going to be
• 54:01
  there, whether you check now, in six months, 12 months, or in two
• 54:05
  years or in 10 years, it does not matter.
• 54:07
  You are still going to find reasons to be scared.
• 54:10
  You're still going to find reasons to be fearful.
• 54:12
  I do it every single day. But the reality is if you trust
• 54:17
  yourself, you can push through that and you can 321 go.
• 54:20
  I trust me and I trust I've got it regardless of what happens.
• 54:23
  And I want to share something with you.
• 54:26
  I had one of my past mentors, I had, you know, built a business
• 54:30
  quite large when he was mentoring me.
• 54:32
  And I had said to him, you know, I'm really just worried that I'm
• 54:35
  going to lose it all. And so I didn't really want to
• 54:36
  build it bigger because I didn't want to outgrow.
• 54:39
  I didn't want to continue to grow to a certain place outside
• 54:42
  of where I was because I thought, what if it, what if it
• 54:46
  fails? What if it burns to the ground?
• 54:47
  What if it dies? And so he said, OK, great,
• 54:50
  that's your fear. And I said, yes, like, I'm
• 54:52
  definitely, definitely afraid of the fact that that could happen.
• 54:55
  And so he said, OK, great. Let's just play in that for a
• 54:57
  second. So what would be the worst thing
• 55:00
  that could happen if your business failed And like, it
• 55:02
  completely burns to the ground? And I'm like, well, I don't want
• 55:04
  to think about that in that way. And he's like, well, just
• 55:06
  entertain me. What would you do?
• 55:08
  And I was like, well, I'd be really sad.
• 55:12
  And then I would probably go get a serving job again and make
• 55:16
  money and I'd start a business again.
• 55:18
  Or I'd go work inside of someone else's business and start the
• 55:20
  business again. And So what we did is we pulled
• 55:23
  this thread and we really created this like very specific
• 55:26
  painted picture of what would happen if I failed.
• 55:29
  And I lived in that and I sat in that and I pictured that.
• 55:32
  And I was like, if I failed, what would it look like and how
• 55:34
  would it show up? And when I did, I realized even
• 55:39
  if even if the worst case scenario happened and my
• 55:43
  business burnt to the ground, I trust myself at such a deep
• 55:48
  level that I'm just going to go build another business.
• 55:51
  It's not going to mean anything. I'm just going to go trust
• 55:54
  myself to go do it again. And so when all of that came up,
• 55:58
  it made me realize that it all still at the end of the day
• 56:02
  comes back to me. It all just comes back to me.
• 56:06
  So what I want to do is I want to actually share some things
• 56:10
  for you to consider of how you can build confidence because
• 56:15
  confidence is something that you have access to.
• 56:17
  You do not need to, again, wait for competence to happen.
• 56:21
  You don't have to wait for your capabilities to happen or get to
• 56:24
  a certain place before then we press go.
• 56:26
  Confidence is about the fact that you can actually build it.
• 56:29
  It's not just a performance. OK, so you're not performing.
• 56:33
  You're not performing as confidence.
• 56:35
  You're actually living and breathing and building
• 56:38
  confidence. So first is you have to take one
• 56:44
  brave next step. You have to do something that
• 56:47
  creates and builds belief. The thing that I see is that so
• 56:52
  many of you will look to say to yourself, I want to have reason
• 56:59
  to be confident before I do. And I will tell you, you got to
• 57:04
  remove that as the reason you're not going to get where you want
• 57:06
  to go. Because The thing is, if you
• 57:09
  need everything to line up, you're never going to do so.
• 57:12
  Ask yourself, what is something right now that is a brave next
• 57:16
  step that you could take to give yourself and create yourself
• 57:20
  some momentum toward the goal that you have, the potential
• 57:23
  that you know is possible for you.
• 57:25
  Because that is something that will help to give you evidence.
• 57:28
  Just like me, it's a matter of that small step.
• 57:31
  For me, the small step was not running out of that room where I
• 57:35
  had my first speaking opportunity.
• 57:36
  Getting on stage and saying like this is a step toward my future.
• 57:40
  I'm not committing to being a public speaker for the next two
• 57:43
  years full time. But what I am doing is I'm
• 57:45
  getting on this stage in this moment right now.
• 57:49
  And so I want you to think of what that thing is for you.
• 57:51
  What's that brave next step of the thing that you know that you
• 57:54
  could do or that you need to do, but you're not doing?
• 57:57
  That's important because we need micro actions to give us
• 58:00
  momentum. And the momentum comes from the
• 58:03
  fact that you had the fear, you trusted yourself, you did it and
• 58:06
  now you have evidence that you did it.
• 58:08
  All of that builds the Trust Bank inside of you.
• 58:11
  And what that means as we, as we take all those micro actions and
• 58:14
  we're building all that trust inside of us.
• 58:16
  What ends up happening is when that next fear comes, that next
• 58:19
  resistance comes your way, you are not even nearly as rattled
• 58:24
  by it. Cuz you're like, well that is
• 58:25
  scary, yes, but I have all this self trust that I've built.
• 58:29
  When you have no evidence of self trust, you're going to
• 58:33
  ruminate because you have nothing to anchor to.
• 58:35
  But the thing I'm here to tell you is you will never have
• 58:38
  anything to anchor to. You'll never have anything to
• 58:40
  anchor to as self trust if you don't start to build it within
• 58:43
  you. And that comes from taking those
• 58:45
  micro actions, those micro steps every single day.
• 58:48
  With that, your evidence is going to be when your confidence
• 58:52
  becomes your proof. OK, so the evidence is impactful
• 58:56
  because your confidence becomes your proof.
• 58:59
  It becomes sourced from this proof that you've built.
• 59:02
  So you start to think about tracking your evidence of all
• 59:06
  these things that you've done, and that becomes your insight
• 59:09
  into your capabilities and what you're as an entrepreneur and in
• 59:12
  your life truly capable of. You can reflect on challenges
• 59:16
  you've experienced. You can reflect on risks that
• 59:18
  you've taken. You can reflect on results that
• 59:21
  you've created. You can reflect on all the
• 59:23
  things that you've done. And I remember even in the
• 59:25
  earlier parts, when I first started my business, I didn't
• 59:28
  get my confidence from my business because I didn't have
• 59:30
  any confidence in my business. I had I had no business like it
• 59:33
  was really I was a baby entrepreneur, but I had to take
• 59:36
  it from other things. I thought to myself, OK, well, I
• 59:39
  was, I was told that I when I was younger had this learning
• 59:42
  disability and I would never, you know, basically be able to
• 59:45
  get into school. But then I did get into school
• 59:48
  and I was told that I would never, you know, get a degree in
• 59:50
  anything but that I ended up getting it in social work.
• 59:53
  So I had all of these things I started to anchor into be like,
• 59:56
  that was not supposed to work, but it did.
• 59:58
  That was not supposed to work, but it did.
• 1:00:00
  And So what I did is I started to build this, this resource of
• 1:00:04
  trusting myself. And you know, even for me, this
• 1:00:08
  is not even just in business, but in personal too.
• 1:00:11
  I have so many personal things that I've navigated.
• 1:00:13
  I've overcome very difficult times of mental health.
• 1:00:17
  I have overcome very difficult endings of relationships, and
• 1:00:21
  I've become OK. I've been OK at the end of it.
• 1:00:24
  It was hard. It was difficult, but I've
• 1:00:27
  become OK at the end of it. And so I anchor into those to be
• 1:00:30
  like, if this relationship is ending and it feels like my
• 1:00:34
  world is ending and it feels like this is going to Take Me
• 1:00:36
  Out, that's a valid feeling. But it also showed me that there
• 1:00:41
  were other moments that felt that way in my life that I
• 1:00:43
  thought, this is it for me. And this is like going to wipe
• 1:00:46
  me out basically. And then when it came up again,
• 1:00:50
  I was like, well, I do remember having that in this situation
• 1:00:52
  and it didn't wipe me out. And I ended up thriving after
• 1:00:55
  that. And so I anchor into those to
• 1:00:57
  realize the same thing can be true today.
• 1:00:59
  I can still feel like this is the the walls caving in.
• 1:01:02
  I can feel like my world is ending and I'm still potentially
• 1:01:06
  in this going to be perfectly fine because I've had, I have
• 1:01:09
  gone through and as you have, you've gone through some tough
• 1:01:12
  shit. You've gone through some
• 1:01:14
  difficult things and you've overcome those.
• 1:01:18
  And so let's anchor into that. Even if you don't have the
• 1:01:20
  anchor in your business, anchor into it in the things you've
• 1:01:23
  gone through in your life and how you've persevered and you've
• 1:01:25
  overcome those. That same strength is available
• 1:01:29
  to you to resource and to anchor into today within your business.
• 1:01:33
  Do it. And I know this is the most
• 1:01:34
  simple thing to say, but do it scared.
• 1:01:36
  The idea of fear has to be eliminated.
• 1:01:39
  Fear doesn't need to be eliminated.
• 1:01:41
  It needs to be regulated. OK, fear is not to be
• 1:01:46
  eliminated. Fear is to be regulated.
• 1:01:49
  To have confidence is not again the absence of fear, but is the
• 1:01:52
  presence of self trust. We are not going to look to
• 1:01:56
  remove fear. That day when I was speaking, I
• 1:01:59
  was not looking to remove the fear.
• 1:02:01
  My heart was pumping, I was sweating.
• 1:02:04
  All the things were happening that was not going to change.
• 1:02:08
  That was not something that adjusted.
• 1:02:10
  But what I did do is I closed my eyes, I took deep breaths.
• 1:02:13
  I got outside, got my face in the sun.
• 1:02:16
  I regulated myself because what that did is it allowed me to
• 1:02:20
  tune back in and to realize that I can see and experience all the
• 1:02:25
  fear and it's not going away, but I get to determine my
• 1:02:28
  experience of it. This on a more extreme example,
• 1:02:32
  when they train, for example, people in the army or in the
• 1:02:35
  military, they have to allow their nervous systems to be
• 1:02:40
  comfortable around a lot of stimuli of fear.
• 1:02:44
  And So what they're taught is to regulate in these chaotic fear
• 1:02:49
  based environments. If they were like, well, we're
• 1:02:52
  not going to act until everything feels like it's safe,
• 1:02:56
  we'd be a little bit out of it at a tough place because it
• 1:02:59
  means that you can't act. It means that you can't move in
• 1:03:02
  any capacity. Instead, what they're taught is
• 1:03:06
  tools to regulate and to stay calm as a paramedic would, as a
• 1:03:10
  cop would in any situation, to stay calm in the most
• 1:03:15
  heightened, the most intense experiences that could be in
• 1:03:18
  front of us. And the same thing is true for
• 1:03:20
  you in those moments, even though it's not maybe the same
• 1:03:22
  situation, the feeling can remain the same in our bodies.
• 1:03:25
  It's fight, flight, or freeze. So in that moment, it's going to
• 1:03:29
  feel like you're being chased by a bear.
• 1:03:31
  And it's your job to learn tools that work best for you to be
• 1:03:35
  able to regulate that feeling that's happening inside your
• 1:03:37
  mind and inside your body. And so the other thing that I
• 1:03:41
  will also say is that if you are someone who does not feel like
• 1:03:44
  yourself, trust is quite solid. You feel like you've thought
• 1:03:48
  about past business experiences and you don't have a lot to
• 1:03:50
  anchor into. And maybe you have some things
• 1:03:52
  in your life personally that you've thought about, but you
• 1:03:54
  don't really feel like that's a lot to anchor, anchor into.
• 1:03:57
  What I want to invite you to is to borrow belief from people
• 1:04:01
  around you. There's been so many moments in
• 1:04:05
  my career as an entrepreneur where I had no belief in
• 1:04:10
  something. I didn't believe I could charge
• 1:04:12
  a certain price. I didn't believe that I could do
• 1:04:14
  a certain thing. I didn't believe that something
• 1:04:17
  would sell. I have all the same fears that
• 1:04:19
  you do. I have all of those.
• 1:04:22
  And in those moments, I tap into my own self trust.
• 1:04:24
  And at a certain moments when I felt like my own trust was low,
• 1:04:27
  or maybe I felt like it, it was depleted in some way because I'd
• 1:04:31
  been going through whatever. I lean on my environment and I
• 1:04:34
  lean on my peers and I would I would call in people that I
• 1:04:37
  consider to be my advisors to give me and borrow their
• 1:04:41
  confidence in me. I would have them speak into me
• 1:04:44
  to be like, Kate, you have done this, this, this and this.
• 1:04:46
  You can crush this. This is going to be easy.
• 1:04:49
  You're going to blow it out the park.
• 1:04:51
  You're going to crush this. I would need those messages at
• 1:04:54
  times and I would need them to remind me of things that maybe
• 1:04:58
  when I started to go into my own Trust Bank never came through
• 1:05:01
  for me, right. So when I started to think
• 1:05:04
  about, oh, well, I can't do this.
• 1:05:05
  And someone says, remember, you know, two years ago when XYZ
• 1:05:08
  happened. And I'm like, Oh yeah.
• 1:05:09
  And they're like, yeah, this is the same situation.
• 1:05:12
  You got this. And I'm like, I got this.
• 1:05:16
  OK, So like it's, I also wanted, I wanted to talk about this too,
• 1:05:20
  because I don't want it to feel. And I think this is sometimes
• 1:05:24
  how it feels when we watch entrepreneurs that we admire.
• 1:05:26
  I also don't want to feel like people believe that I like, I'm
• 1:05:32
  just crushing confidence all the time.
• 1:05:34
  Like I'm just like, I'm forever confident.
• 1:05:35
  I'm never scared. I'm always crushing like I'm,
• 1:05:38
  it's not that way that way it's just not.
• 1:05:40
  And that is because fear lives in all of us in some capacity.
• 1:05:45
  We all have hesitations. We all have resistances.
• 1:05:48
  The difference I will say now is #1 how they show up is changing
• 1:05:52
  the length in which they exist in my body and my brain is very
• 1:05:55
  minimal compared to what they used to be.
• 1:05:56
  It's very quick processing because I've learned regulation,
• 1:06:00
  I've learned myself Trust Bank. I've learned how to lean into
• 1:06:02
  advisors. With practice and reps, I am
• 1:06:07
  getting much quicker at being able to tap into my confidence
• 1:06:10
  in moments where maybe initially automatically it wasn't there.
• 1:06:14
  And the same thing is going to be true for you.
• 1:06:16
  And So what I will say is that I want you to remember that
• 1:06:19
  confidence is really at, at its core, confidence is self trust,
• 1:06:24
  but confidence is also a memory. Confidence is the ability for
• 1:06:29
  you to tap into the times when you moved, when you acted, when
• 1:06:32
  you did the hard thing, even when the circumstances, the
• 1:06:36
  environment, the extent around you was hard or was difficult,
• 1:06:40
  you did it anyways. And so I want you as a piece of
• 1:06:45
  homework. If I could coach you right now,
• 1:06:48
  I would want to give you the piece of homework to ask
• 1:06:50
  yourself, how are you building up that bank?
• 1:06:52
  How are you building up more and more evidence, more and more
• 1:06:57
  memory of the fact that you have confidence that you're doing the
• 1:07:00
  hard thing and that you are pushing yourself.
• 1:07:03
  The people that you watch, the people that you admire as
• 1:07:06
  business owners are no different than you and I.
• 1:07:09
  We all have fear. We all have hesitation.
• 1:07:11
  The difference is there's some people who are controlled by it
• 1:07:14
  and there's some people who live with it, meaning that they know
• 1:07:17
  how to work in harmony with it. It doesn't control them, it's
• 1:07:21
  still there. So you still have those
• 1:07:23
  thoughts, maybe you still have those moments, but they
• 1:07:25
  decrease. And when they do come up, we
• 1:07:27
  feel much more in harmony with it than feeling like it
• 1:07:30
  completely controls us and therefore bottlenecks our
• 1:07:33
  beliefs, our actions, our outcomes, and our behaviors.
• 1:07:37
  So let's also look at, is there a way for you to practice more
• 1:07:42
  courageous action daily? Can we start to build that Trust
• 1:07:45
  Bank, build that evidence bank daily so that you have more to
• 1:07:49
  anchor into in the moments when you feel like you don't have
• 1:07:52
  confidence and you don't trust that you can lean into those and
• 1:07:55
  say, but I have evidence of ABC and D and that today I'm
• 1:07:59
  starting to build and add to so I have something to tap into in
• 1:08:02
  those moments where I'm not feeling confident.
• 1:08:05
  So today was all things confidence.
• 1:08:07
  I hope today was helpful. This was really something that I
• 1:08:10
  started to think to myself, you know, in moments where I've
• 1:08:13
  needed insight or where I've needed support, what was the
• 1:08:16
  thing I lacked? Most of the things that I've
• 1:08:18
  achieved in my business have all been on the other side of fear.
• 1:08:21
  And people ask me all the time, how are you so confident in
• 1:08:24
  things? And truthfully, I wouldn't say
• 1:08:26
  that I am the most confident in things.
• 1:08:29
  I would say that I create confidence like nobody's
• 1:08:32
  business, and that's through the different things that I execute.
• 1:08:37
  It's through the different things that I create.
• 1:08:39
  It's through the different pieces of evidence that I
• 1:08:41
  collect and make for myself every single day.
• 1:08:44
  And just as I do that you have the ability to do that as well.
• 1:08:47
  So I hope today was helpful as always.
• 1:08:49
  You guys know that I love to hear from you.
• 1:08:50
  So if there's anything that landed today, maybe a line that
• 1:08:53
  landed, a quote that landed, or maybe you want to even share and
• 1:08:56
  be witnessed in that next big action that you plan to take
• 1:09:00
  within your business, within your life.
• 1:09:02
  That next thing you're going to do to really step into the
• 1:09:05
  confidence and the self trust you have.
• 1:09:07
  If you want also pop that over to me in the DMS, I would love
• 1:09:10
  to hear it and I would love to be able to share that with you.
• 1:09:12
  So all of that being said, thank you so much for spending time
• 1:09:14
  with me today. And, as always, stay ambitious.