Latest / The Vincere Project / Episode 32. Fall In
Transcript
- Vince: All right, today's special guest. Mary: Hey Vince Vince: Hey Mary, special guest. the podcast keeps going, you know, and the episodes keep rolling and I I think the the title of this one is Fall In because that's kinda where we're at. And and w we just had the Vet retreat and I shared that last week's podcast, kind of the short version and the highlights of it. but you pointed out an interesting note in our after action. review or report is that hey, this is the first one we've had three females at and you know, made some interesting observations and some interesting notes. What do you attribute that to at this point? Mary: Well, females are interesting creatures. Female veterans are even more interesting creatures in that, you know, always have a battle buddy wherever you go, whether it's at home or overseas. And I think the word of mouth between female veterans, wherever they have a social connection, whether it's during service, post service, you know, or just different organizations, I feel like Once they get a verbal yes or I've already sniffed it out, I feel like that's more sacred than a social media like advertisement, I guess you could say. whether we have a thousand followers or a million, unless another female veteran feels comfortable going and can then vouch and share that message with her girls. I don't necessarily see it being a success. and so this was a good reminder that, you know, women veterans, they're busy. but you know, they are a significant population. And they also need a retreat. So it was nice to serve female veterans this year, and then in the planning stages moving forward. continue to incorporate females so that they're comfortable at our each hour training and events retreats. Vince: Yeah, I'd agree with that. And and I think you make an important statement. You know, the female veterans are are busy like everyone else, right? Not that civilians are less or more busy. it it just takes a lot for a mom or a grandmother mother, caretaker, employee, business owner, manager, anybody in what they have going on in their lives, being a spouse, wife, et cetera. to to take forty eight or seventy two hours for themselves. So I think you were very conscientious of that. And I I just want to give you a compliment. You a great job, setting expectations. I would say too, like Shawna and Jamie are super helpful in that, like helping set conditions that are favorable to the needs of all the veterans. But I think in this case, because there were so many female veterans, it was good to have a few more females there, if that makes sense. Mary: Yeah, and well and the H hour staff is well versed in veteran background. So I've dragged them to events all over the country for them to either take Vince: Yeah. Mary: pictures of. I've I dragged Aunt Jamie, our photographer, into a weapons museum in Wyoming for her to capture during my VFW Teacher of the Year trip. And then Shawna you know, from the time I was in high school, has been following the different events that I've either been a part of or held and you know Just by design, you learn more about veterans, and then in this case, female veterans, and our our frame of mind and our decision-making process. So it I feel like out of most female employees from H hour help those others joining us feel comfortable. I hope that makes sense. That was hard to explain. Vince: Yeah. Mary: they're well versed, you know? So not that males aren't, but I feel like Vince: No, I think it's I think it's tending Mary: There's less females. Vince: to the needs. It's tending to the needs. I think tending to the needs. I think word of mouth matters and the safety and security matters more so for the women veterans or female veterans than it does for the males. I d I think that's what it comes down to. You know, because you're sharing a space in a house with strangers and other people. and depending on the backdrop, sometimes it's been co ed, other times it's been, you know, women have been had their own house and then the men have had their own house. So I think what the the key takeaway I had and and I and I I think it's important to note for us is hey, if a retreat is requested by an organization or a group, there's things that we have to be mindful of to be able to tend to that. hey, just 'cause the label is veteran and all veterans need to stick together, which is true. But as far as an immersive or exposure experience, I think there's some specific needs for different portions of the population. Mary: Yeah, absolutely. that dictates the housing situation that we come up with. So in this case, we were able to build a buffer between, you know, female and male veterans with the staff. However, that's just the way that it fell. And moving forward, it's something that will definitely continue to be on our radar so that everyone feels comfortable because whether or not they're sharing a room together, if both sides of the house are married or going through some significant trauma, they're Vince: Yeah. Mary: not going to want to be associated. you know, they're not gonna want to share a wall with someone who Vince: Yeah. Mary: might be part of their their bad story. I just feel like it was a success and the the planning and summer planning, right? Because you're like, how was your summer? It's like, well, you know, it was It's busy. We're we're trying to make sure that this thing flows so that we capture any mistakes up front or any mistakes that could become catastrophes. And that that goes back down to how far away is the nearest hospital in urgent care. So Vince: Yeah. Yeah, the administrative part, the logistics of it, the operational flow of it, the airports, the roads, the routes, hotels, everyone's safety, contact information, making sure the Wi Fi works. Look, reverse living, right? The kitchen was on the third floor. So like if if somebody has an impairment or physically struggles Mary: Yeah. Vince: to get up down those stairs, right, getting to breakfast becomes becomes a leap, right? So the housing and the planning and all that stuff definitely makes makes the backdrop for all of it and everybody's comfort and safety. I think that's important. Another thing noted in the surveys was and some of the feedback that you got was about the freedom to do for how folks felt like they wanted to be treated or to do or to isolate or to include or to not. And you said that was by design. what's the benefits of that? Having more of an a la carte kind of worldview on retreat style work. Mary: There w I feel like there was less stress of a timeline. In the military, there's stressful timelines. There's more Vince: Mm-hmm. Mary: laxed timelines in some cases. However, you know, as soon as your alarm goes off, you have to hit the ground running to make sure that you eat breakfast in order to get ready for the first event. And our previous Vince: Yeah. Mary: retreats have been the same way, you know, dictating weather. We might have an event getting ready to kick off at six AM. So that forces participants to get up before that to maybe prepare coffee or call a loved one just in case. hey, I'm going surfing today, And I feel Vince: Yeah. Mary: like although I wasn't really sure about it, because I am one of those you know, very disciplined individuals that likes, you know, structure and order, not knowing how many people were going to come to yoga was kind of like it was like a little scratch. I was like, huh. But at the same time, We also haven't had a retreat where people got to sleep in as an activity. and that really blew my mind that, wait a minute, it's it's called R and R and LBI for a reason. These people haven't Vince: Hello. Mary: had the opportunity to sleep into nine o'clock. and that just allows us again, right? We have that freedom in our little privately owned business where other retreats might have to cater to somebody at 6 a.m. no, we have to go here so that we can get breakfast with Bob, who, really loves veterans. Whereas, you know, you get the option, hey, do you want to do yoga? Yeah. No, I'd rather sleep in. Or, hey, I didn't set an alarm. If I'm up, I'll do it. Or I'm gonna join halfway through. And I feel like that was a like a pivotal moment for us, each event. And really allowed people to have less stress and not worry as much about timelines. So Vince: No, I think that's the iterative process of these things and that's the feedback and being open to the feedback, right? We we feel like we make great plans and it's all the things I would want to do and and you know and and the genius happens with, hey, we're just gonna go to the lighthouse and use the natural backdrop of of the terrain to make it a beautiful day, right? And I think I think that sleeping in thing is listening to the people on the first night, you know, the first meeting, right? When we for have the first group and the introductions and you get when four out of five people are like, Yeah, I I just don't have to run out the door to work. I don't have my three kids. I'm not beholden to my rigid schedule. I kind of want to sleep to seven, right? Like having that flexibility to be like, hey, that group right there, like we have 80% of that like, hey, I just don't want to have to run after a school bus in the morning. And it and and being humble enough to be like, all right, like we're gonna have to scratch this particular event. and then maybe it's a later night kind of group, which it was, right? Most of the folks in the conversations went on late into the evening. and I think that's that's your flexibility and I think everybody takes commands from the tower, meaning you're like, Hey, let's guide it this way, let's move it that way, and then having everybody around you be super flexible in terms of where they end up and what they do during the retreat. So I just want to give you that compliment. Really good. Yeah. It's really good. Mary: Thank you. No, and I felt I felt like it was appreciated by everybody. nobody staring at each other where's so and so supposed to be here. It's like now the only people that need to be here are the ones getting paid to be here. Like they're the only one like Vince: Yeah, yeah. Mary: breakfast is gonna is going to be served at a certain time and it'll be available when, you know, heads start getting off of pillows. And I think like we might be on to something here. with this slow start. So I'm excited to see where it'll go. moving on to next year. Vince: Yeah. I think if if we do another one in the spring or in the summer, I think the slow start is a thing. And I think it depends on the group, right? if it's if it's if it's veterans that are looking for adrenaline hit, right, we we create that backdrop. If it's folks that are looking for combination, we create that. but maybe maybe it's a Vietnam era veteran group that wants a version of a retreat. Maybe it's a couples retreat, which I I I go back and forth on. I think it's bound to happen and I think we do have the secret sauce. I think it's how do busy people give up forty eight to seventy two hours of their time? Up to ninety six, right? Because if there's travel and people are flying in from other parts of the country, that person does have an extra leg on the front and back end and and I think we're considerate of that stuff. I feel I find that for a lot of people they assume because of my background or our backgrounds is that we're looking for people that are dealing with psychiatric crisis. And I always have to remind Ken and I think you know, I I think Pat got that eventually. I I think a lot of people in the Veteran space get this. Is that You if it's a psychiatric issue, like an advanced thing with the diagnoses, right? We have people that can serve there or help and refer and provide resources. But this weekend is for the men and women that are like, Hey, no, I'm doing well. I just need a break for two days. I Mary: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Vince: got I got childcare. Mom mom and dad flew in to take care of the baby. I have two days to come fishing and and jump out of planes Mary: Right. Vince: or go to lighthouse or eat good food. So no, I think good job on that stuff. and and I think we want to keep that going. So Whoever's listening, right? If you want if you want us to do a retreat for you for the veteran space, I think Mary: Yeah. Vince: it's at least for the conversation. Mary: And I feel like it is a menu or a brochure moving forward. I think it's almost like laid out, hey, skydiving, surfing, Jersey shore versus Delaware water gap, fishing, maybe tubing and hiking. And then you have Vince: Yeah. Mary: more of like it's an upfront, all right, I could see myself doing that, but I know I'm not staying in a beach house on Long Beach Island. I'll be staying, in a lodge or Airbnb up in the mountains. So Full expectations are there for you though. And then you get to Vince: Yeah. Mary: choose more of what you're going to do. This past one we did was just a complete, hey, I'm gonna send you an itinerary, and then three days later, I'm like, don't open that itinerary. We are not doing any of that stuff. the weather is not safe. Vince: Yeah. Mary: I can't put you on a boat. my insurance does not cover that. And hope you're good walking. So, but moving forward, I think having those menus, That attract other types of veterans for their what their version of a retreat would be. So that there is no surprise if there's a 6 a.m. Vince: Exactly. Mary: surf session or you walk in the door and then by the way, we have to go to the jump zone because that's our window to fly, essentially. So I I I do think Vince: The drop zone. Yeah. Mary: that we've been, compiling all this data from our past retreats and you know, it's it's definitely been beneficial to our participants and we can only get better as we go forward by Vince: Yeah. Mary: listening to our participants. Vince: Yeah, they tell you exactly what it is. And I think Mary: Yeah. Vince: I think that's it is I think I think sometimes when when folks are beholden to external stakeholders and donors and things like that, they have to be relatively rigid with their mission statement and how they serve and support. And they have to follow through and there's a another Mary: Mm-hmm. Vince: level of reporting and all the tax implications and stuff like that. So I think you know, you running it through training and events in a small business. It gives you that small flexibility to be able to bang lefts and rights and navigate easy terrain. It's not a large organization in terms of revenue, money, or or number of retreats. But I I do Mary: No. Vince: think that flexibility matters and I think the veterans and the participants in general appreciate that part of it, that it's not so forceful and mandated. Because stakeholders want accountability of every every penny, nickel, and dime Mary: Yeah. Vince: contributed. And if somebody doesn't do an event, right, the argument could be made is like, they're stealing an opportunity from another veteran. Mary: Sure. Vince: Whereas you and I have discussed and talked about that we don't necessarily feel that way. it's a good thing. These Mary: Yeah. Yeah, no, I agree. Vince: s the segue over here, and I think this is important, is the beach event is coming up. what's the first event? What's the first part of it? What do I need to be ready for? Mary: man, it's gonna be dark. so it is on daylight savings time. Or daylight savings. It is on daylight savings. So you have this option to sleep in for your extra hour or get up and join us, which you know, is it's a decision that's been made by at least six people at this point. however, Vince: Yeah. Mary: there is gonna be some darkness and s half of the beginning part will be you'll have a light and then Maybe about half of the beginning you will not have a light, but there will be a map, not a scary map, Vince: Okay. Mary: not a comp not a compass map, not a military map, like an overlay. hey, this is route one, route two, possibly route three. So it's like enjoyable route. And using that sense in the darkness, right? We might have some overcast, we might have some moonlight, but either way, it's gonna be pretty special and if you've never worked with a headlamp before, it's gonna be even better. So Vince: Yeah. Mary: I'm super excited. Once you get to the beach, everything just it does its thing. The beach is still there. Brock and I checked it. In fact, I've been checking it consistently because I just wanted to make sure that it just doesn't disappear again like it did a few weeks ago. So it is there for our participants. So don't worry. however, you know, we're gonna mess a little bit with the senses and then yeah, daylight savings. Vince: Yeah. Mary: I can't tell you anymore. You're doing the event and when you you tend to ask too many questions, you start to analyze stuff. Vince: No, no, you said something important there, don't worry. And the good thing for you is I don't worry about anything ever. So you don't have to you don't have to include me in that part of the message. That worries more for you andor other people that might be apprehensive. I I'm I'm not worried even a little bit. I'm very optimistic though. I do think what will happen is the six folks that show up, it'll be great. And you know, look, once you T C people drop out because it gets real. It's like, I'm gonna be doing this for four hours and for whatever reasons folks opt not to. I don't know, maybe we create a reservation model, maybe we have a pay advance. But I like the version where it's just like, hey, if you show up, great. Just just pay people to participate. So I don't know. We'll Mary: Yeah, me too. Yeah. Vince: change those to go forward. Hey, one thing I want to finish up on with a few more minutes here is we got the corporate stuff of it. When this gets released, me and on the training and event side, one of our advisors, comrade Mike, him and I will be down doing a reconnaissance in Central America Mary: Mm. Vince: for future retreats. What are you excited about there? What do you think? Mary: Man, uncharted territory. I don't know too many veterans that have been to El Salvador, let alone got on a veterans retreat there. I feel like out Vince: Yeah. Mary: west has been stamped pretty hard by various organizations. Vince: Yeah. Mary: I feel like cities have been stamped for professional developments by veteran retreats, hunting, fishing. But Central America is it's like it's like the wild west back in the day. So the Oregon Trail is going south. And I'm excited to see where you guys stop and hopefully there's no dysentery. But I think you guys are gonna find you know, some cool activities and I hope we can create something that's the first of its kind again. Vince: know if it'll be the first of its kind or not. I think we'll copy and paste from super smart people and and put our thumbprint on it is is just good business, right? Yet I think that portion of the world in that particular country, it has its history, right? In the seventies and eighties, I mean they had a rad Civil War going on, two civil wars, right? And you know, and then they have some you know, pretty extreme policy going on right now as far as locking people Mary: Yeah. Vince: up and The rule of and process. It could be argued as a dictatorship, but y you hear folks on the left they'll cry like, what about all of the civil rights and and and all of that stuff? Well, what about the victims' civil rights and the people that were held hostage by all the gangs there? So I know hopefully we don't run into any gangs or any banditos or anybody doing any good and no good, I'm sorry. But I anticipate you're right. We're gonna find a good spot, whether it's in the mountains or down by the beach, surfing, fishing, maybe Marlin or tuna, something like that, and all the good food. and holistic yoga stuff. So you know, if we raise enough money on the eighty eight mile run, that is tr accelerates that curve and we'll partner with the right people. But I think I think that'll be good. man, what recommendation or advice do you have for the eighty eight miler? You probably won't be on the podcast for a while. What do what's your expectation? What do you think for me and Brock? Mary: I think it's slow and steady. Eighty eight miles is a little bit less than thirty a day if you wanted to break it down that way. If you wanted to do it in two, then you have two forty forty plus miles. I mean it's it's shuffle, walk, hydrate, eat. Take your salt tab. If I don't see a water Vince: No, no. Mary: like strapped to you guys, then I'm gonna have to come find you in the dark with my little headlamp and Vince: Yeah. Mary: you know. But I think it's going to be I don't I don't think it's going to be too much of a lift because you're not you're not looking to beat some record. We're looking to create an opportunity for more veterans to continue to get awesome Vince: Yeah. Mary: experiences. And the keen student body, has pretty strong veterans and I feel like it's a great platform to put a group of guys and gals together and get on an gnarly retreat, get them doing some awesome stuff. So make sure that you contribute to the eighty eight. Myler, go fund me. The link is on the Vince Your Project Instagram. And we'll pretty much post it every Vince: I it is, it is. Mary: other day 'cause Vince said, if you're a good person, you will think to donate. Vince: Yeah, well, so that is very true, right? It's interesting. So far the people, 'cause I wanted to run the experiment, I send some direct invites to people like, Hey man, I need I need twenty bucks in my G string for this thing, right? Trying to trying to raise some money, right? And everybody right away was like, Yeah, no doubt, absolutely, total fidelity and process. And then we turn it over to social media. We're at nine hundred fifty eight dollars. I think if we get to five K, that's about ten flights. And then we need somebody to fund for all the the chicken, beef eggs, fish, and maybe some casitas in the mountains. So it's a good partnership. Look here's a good thing too, is right, is is if it does work and we raise the right funding, look, H-Hour counseling is gonna contribute, H-Hour training events, the Vincere project will make a donation to it as well. And I'm excited for Brock too. You know, seeing a student go on their journey and then they're gonna come full circle to you know, where they entered military service symbolically and make that transformation. and I'm very candid with him and everybody else. Mary: So Brock serve Brock served at the finish point of the eighty eight miler. So that'll Vince: They all start they all start their career there. Mary: Huh. Vince: They all start their career there. So I I told him or anybody else is like it doesn't get easy going into the future just because you did what you did in the military didn't do. If you're doing it right on the back half, right, it it'll be like s just an afterthought or a footnote in the book, like, hey, you're in the military. In this case, by the way, you're in the Coast Guard. And it's an important part of our service. That's why we continue to serve in that capacity. but I don't think anybody can make it everything for for what they have going on in this world. 88 Mile Run, if you're a good person, you'll donate. you hear more from Mary maybe this winter, maybe not. We got more guests coming in. Anything else, Mary? Come, looks like you froze. We're good. Mary's signing off. I'm in an echo chamber. Now we're just rambling. Two minutes over. All good.