Latest / Xenomania / Naughty List: Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) – Xenomania 49

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Naughty List: Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984) – Xenomania 49 · Xenomania

0:02
No, be afraid.
0:06
Be very afraid.
0:15
Kearns: Christmas.
0:16
Right.
0:17
Ryan: 12 pins at Christmas.
0:19
Kearns: It's a, song stringing up these
0:22
Jon: Yeah.
0:23
Ryan: Well, that's always a pain.
0:25
Jon: Yeah,
0:26
Kearns: It does 'em always.
0:27
What's the first one?
0:29
thing at Christmas.
0:29
That's such a pain to me.
0:32
That one.
0:33
Ryan: I never heard of it, but I want to hear it now.
0:35
I
0:35
Jon: I,
0:36
Ryan: I,
0:36
Jon: I've heard it, but I don't remember it.
0:38
Kearns: I would take, it's a long one.
0:39
It's the whole song.
0:42
Jon: Yeah, you will, find that there is not much Christmas music that I like.
0:47
Kearns: Well, I mean
0:48
Jon: There's maybe two or three songs.
0:50
Ryan: through Springsteen.
0:53
Kearns: Springsteen.
0:53
What does
0:53
Jon: Nope.
0:54
Ryan: I
0:54
Jon: Screw that guy.
0:55
Kearns: Screw.
0:56
Jon: Screw the boss.
0:57
Ryan: the boss.
0:59
Yep.
1:04
That's the best rendition, man.
1:06
Kearns: Maybe that's what caused the guy in a silent night.
1:10
Deadly night to go on his killing sprees.
1:12
Ryan: might have been one of the reasons.
1:13
Kearns: they fully
1:14
Jon: If I,
1:15
Kearns: in the movie.
1:16
Ryan: Bob Dylan.
1:18
It's Bob Dylan time right there.
1:19
By the time he goes crazy,
1:23
Kearns: The night Santa went crazy, but weird.
1:24
All Yakovich.
1:25
That's his Christmas song.
1:26
John probably
1:27
Jon: yeah,
1:28
Ryan: he
1:29
Jon: slick Nick.
1:31
Ryan: listen to that too.
1:32
Jon: It's a fishbone
1:32
Kearns: heard that
1:33
Ryan: No, and I am a weird owl fan.
1:35
Kearns: and I went crazy.
1:37
The night say Nick went insane.
1:41
Ryan: Zeno
1:42
Kearns: good.
1:42
Jon: Yeah,
1:43
Ryan: The Christmas album.
1:44
I'm ready.
1:44
Kearns: really?
1:47
That was a good one.
1:48
Jon: I'll tell you what, Christmas songs will not make it
1:50
on a Xenomania Christmas album.
1:54
Any of the ones in Silent Night.
1:56
Deadly Night, they it.
1:58
I love this movie, but it is the worst collection of Christmas carols
2:03
Ryan: gives it
2:03
Jon: ever
2:04
Ryan: though, and I feel like it sets the tone.
2:07
Jon: Kind of, I mean, it's always Christmas on the warm
2:11
side of the door is something.
2:14
Ryan: Uh, independent film, low budget, you know, there, I mean, with
2:20
the consumerism in the background in some scenes, like I saw a job of
2:23
the HUD and Sesame Street characters and all that, and it's like,
2:27
Jon: Yep, yep.
2:28
Ryan: the music, they, they were trying to stay under the radar, I feel for that
2:34
Jon: But so much of that music is not copyrighted.
2:39
You can just record it.
2:41
Ryan: really public domain.
2:44
Jon: Yeah.
2:44
Most, most of the old timey Christmas carols are public domain at this point.
2:50
Ryan: Even
2:51
Jon: You could
2:53
Ryan: 84,
2:54
Jon: 84.
2:55
Yeah.
2:55
Yeah.
2:56
Ryan: out in 81 for some reason.
2:57
Jon: that's why everybody can put out a Christmas album.
3:00
It takes no effort.
3:02
You don't have to write a song.
3:03
You just show up in a studio and sing a song.
3:05
You sang since you were five
3:07
Kearns: You
3:08
Jon: release it.
3:08
Kearns: the bank.
3:09
Follow la
3:10
Jon: Yeah.
3:12
and if you're Mariah Carey, you be, it becomes synonymous with the season.
3:16
And
3:16
Ryan: yeah,
3:18
Jon: you'll get a viral trend of people screaming at the beginning of the song.
3:22
Kearns: bad.
3:24
I don't remember hating it nearly as much when it first came out,
3:26
but the fact that the replayability is like insane, it's just, ugh.
3:31
Jon: Yeah.
3:32
Because it's now, it's just ubiquitous.
3:35
It, you cannot, it, you, there used to be other songs you could were,
3:40
that were like that, that you couldn't avoid, like, um, last Christmas
3:44
you used to not be able to avoid.
3:46
Kearns: Last Christmas I gave you my heart.
3:50
Jon: Mm-hmm.
3:51
Ryan: But that's a classic.
3:53
classic.
3:54
I like that song.
3:55
Kearns: cold outside.
3:56
I don't care if it's Rapy.
4:00
Jon: It's a little, it's
4:01
Ryan: that, no.
4:02
Um,
4:02
Kearns: very, it's a,
4:03
Jon: it's a little,
4:04
Kearns: of
4:05
Jon: it's a little, I mean, for the era.
4:07
It wasn't for now it sure is.
4:11
Ryan: Hmm.
4:11
Kearns: because I'm a man and I told you
4:14
Ryan: Maybe it's cold outside.
4:15
Kearns: You're not going anywhere, Dame.
4:20
It's rough.
4:22
It's from the Giver, a good old shaken,
4:24
Jon: So, yeah.
4:24
Kearns: of music.
4:26
Jon: Yep.
4:27
Yep.
4:29
Kearns: Oh man.
4:30
Jon: So all this Christmas talk and the, the brief illusions.
4:33
Yeah.
4:35
Silent Night.
4:36
Deadly Night.
4:37
It's probably the most controversial movie we've covered.
4:42
Ryan: yes.
4:43
Jon: Not anymore, but when it came out.
4:46
The protests, the reviews.
4:48
Can you, because the, it's not even the first Killer Santa movie.
4:53
Oh, yeah.
4:54
This is,
4:58
mm-hmm.
5:00
They, there were protests, there were Cisco and Ebert Pearl clutching, you
5:05
know, shame on these people for making this movie and making blood money
5:11
as from like, chill, Cisco, chill.
5:16
It's not it, it's not even, I mean, I guess maybe for 1984, maybe
5:21
it's gory, but I don't even think it's particularly gory for 84.
5:26
Kearns: Gory.
5:27
It's not gory at all.
5:28
It's the, it's the visceral nature of the story they're telling
5:31
that made them clutch their
5:33
Jon: Mm-hmm.
5:34
Kearns: It's an uncomfortable
5:35
Jon: Mm-hmm.
5:35
Kearns: what causes people to become the way the guy in the movie became, and it's
5:39
really good at portraying that story.
5:41
They spent 25 minutes on his childhood
5:45
Jon: Yeah.
5:46
Kearns: and they blame Christianity, which is probably another reason
5:49
why the protests were going on.
5:50
It pretty much
5:51
Ryan: Yeah,
5:51
Kearns: the nun.
5:52
Jon: I'm, I'm, I'm sure it,
5:54
Kearns: Yeah.
5:54
Jon: blame, it blames the none more so than the actual religion.
5:58
It blames grandpa, it blames the first Killer Santa.
6:03
Kearns: Yeah.
6:04
Jon: just like a whole string of things that go wrong for Billy
6:07
and he, I mean, it's also 1984 and there's not therapy, like
6:15
Ryan: yeah,
6:15
Jon: if therapy was like for really disturbed or really rich people in 1984,
6:20
it wasn't like everybody went to therapy.
6:22
Kearns: Right.
6:23
Ryan: yeah.
6:23
And
6:24
Kearns: point.
6:24
Ryan: the buildup was really good.
6:26
And a very, I, now I know why Rob Zombie did that for Halloween.
6:31
In 2007 to give that backstory.
6:34
And I, I like that aspect of it.
6:36
I, uh, again, being a first watch for me, silent night, deadly night, I get
6:40
why it's controversial, but I also get why it's a landmark and slasher.
6:47
It's, yeah.
6:49
Kearns: backstories make a bad guy sympathetic, right?
6:53
Like, oh, I see why this guy became this way.
6:56
That's so tragic.
6:57
I'd like to see backstory used, but make it impossible for you to be
7:02
sympathetic, you hated more after the
7:05
Jon: He, yeah, he's just real bad from birth.
7:10
Kearns: a, um, I hate
7:11
Jon: Yeah.
7:11
Kearns: Kuntz because he's such a writhing douche now, but Kuntz
7:14
wrote this amazing, book, I think it was Strangers or something,
7:18
and in it, the boy's father like.
7:20
He's like a serial killer and he takes women downstairs and he murders
7:23
them and then he makes statues out of 'em, which is pretty cool.
7:26
Ryan: Okay.
7:26
Kearns: And they went full on Hannibal Lecter with it though, which
7:29
is something that stuck with me.
7:31
'cause I read it at like 14 and they had the psychologist come in and talk
7:34
about him and he is like, there's no sign of psychopathy and him whatsoever.
7:38
We can't find anything wrong with him.
7:40
He's just
7:42
Ryan: Okay.
7:42
Kearns: does evil things because he likes evil
7:45
Jon: Mm-hmm.
7:46
Kearns: And I was like, Ooh, ooh.
7:49
Jon: Yeah.
7:50
Ryan: Yeah,
7:50
Jon: I like that concept.
7:52
I like that as a concept.
7:53
Yeah.
7:54
Kearns: just the work of the devil.
7:55
I.
7:56
Ryan: Okay.
7:57
Jon: Mm-hmm.
7:58
But like the thing with Cisco and Ebert and the controversy of this movie is
8:04
those are two media savvy guys you would think they would understand
8:09
if they go on their show and make a big fuss about this movie, you've
8:13
just assured people will make money.
8:17
Kearns: what maybe they were getting some cash under the table for it.
8:20
All right guys.
8:20
Shit all over this
8:21
Jon: I mean,
8:22
Ryan: it's horrible.
8:24
Jon: I, I mean, maybe, maybe.
8:26
'cause I, was 12 in 1984 and I picked up some of this stuff and
8:30
I wanted to see this movie so bad.
8:33
Ryan: You know what's forbidden?
8:35
The forbidden fruit.
8:36
We wanna see, we want have an interest.
8:38
And this is it.
8:39
I mean, by
8:40
Jon: Mm-hmm.
8:41
Ryan: movie they've badmouthed, especially in the slasher genre,
8:44
for a horror fan, it's a must watch.
8:47
Kearns: Yeah.
8:47
Ryan: you know,
8:48
Jon: Yeah.
8:49
Ryan: even the ones that they do prop up on a higher note.
8:52
I mean, silence the lamps, since we've mentioned it, it's in that
8:55
whole vibe of is it horror drama?
8:59
They gave it a, you know, a great rating.
9:02
But just saying, but it's like that Academy of Warsaw.
9:06
I agree.
9:06
It's not horror, but that's what they're going for.
9:09
They don't see the true horror, if that makes sense.
9:12
They're blind.
9:14
Kearns: of
9:14
Jon: No.
9:15
Kearns: is, is when he's talking to her and he's like, can you hear them?
9:19
Clarice?
9:19
Can you hear the lambs?
9:21
And that part's probably the scariest part of the movie.
9:23
And when she's walking through his house, like blinded in the
9:26
darkness, and he's looking at her.
9:28
Jon: Mm-hmm.
9:29
Ryan: I mean
9:29
Jon: Mm-hmm.
9:30
Ryan: is shock value real quick.
9:31
Uh, just like the skinning and all that.
9:33
But it's the same thing in Silent Night.
9:35
Deadly Night.
9:35
I, after you get that backstory and you start with him, like, you know,
9:40
having his moment, his PTSD and just kind of becoming this evil Santa Claus,
9:46
basically his rendition of Santa,
9:47
Jon: he's holding up like his, he gets to Christmas, uh, working
9:53
in that store and he's held up.
9:55
Okay.
9:56
Like there's some indications that maybe he's gotten a little
9:58
mouthy and his quality of work has dipped some, but he's not.
10:04
A killer until he has to put the suit on.
10:08
Kearns: Yeah.
10:08
That's like his excuse though.
10:10
He can become.
10:11
That thing.
10:12
And we know what the metaphor is.
10:14
Jon: Yeah.
10:14
Kearns: for those of you who haven't seen it yet, we spoil all movies.
10:17
So go watch it real quick.
10:18
Blah, blah, blah.
10:18
Came out in 1984, um,
10:21
Ryan: hour and 24.
10:22
Kearns: and father are killed.
10:24
And presumably the baby.
10:26
Ryan: No, no, not Ricky
10:27
Jon: No,
10:28
Kearns: Ricky doesn't.
10:28
Jon: no,
10:29
Kearns: Ricky's on.
10:29
Jon: The be the, so we'll, we'll spoil the very, very end.
10:34
Right now, Ricky is the one that he dies in front of in the orphanage.
10:38
Phage.
10:39
Ryan: Which,
10:39
Kearns: way.
10:40
And then he looks at her and goes, naughty.
10:42
Ryan: yes,
10:43
Kearns: Ricky.
10:44
Jon: Uhhuh,
10:44
Kearns: makes the ending a lot
10:45
Jon: yep.
10:46
Ryan: Time out.
10:47
Jon: Yeah.
10:48
That's Ricky.
10:51
Ryan: You've noticed that like.
10:52
Jon: No.
10:53
Yeah, Billy got, Billy got older.
10:56
Ricky got to about eight and stopped.
10:59
Kearns: I get what they were going for.
11:00
They had to do something.
11:01
Ryan: because.
11:01
Kearns: right, so.
11:02
Jon: Yeah.
11:02
Yeah.
11:03
Kearns: Billy's parents are gunned down, uh, by a psychopathic guy in a
11:07
Santa suit and his mother's epic boobs are ripped out and there's like this
11:12
gratuitous moment and then she gets to her throat slit and all that stuff.
11:17
So it's like really graphic scene and the kids in the bushes just watching.
11:21
And then you see like, all right, so there's the
11:22
Jon: Yeah.
11:23
Kearns: He chooses to wear the Santa outfit when he kills people.
11:26
And we'll explain more about what, he's not a killer yet.
11:29
He gets pushed there by Jesus later on.
11:32
Um, right now, like what he chooses to use is his medium for getting
11:38
rid of that is the Santa outfit.
11:40
And that is such a message and it's very true, like it's kind of ahead of
11:44
its time as far as psychological stuff
11:46
Jon: Mm-hmm.
11:49
Ryan: I wanted to add something into the mix because when you see the
11:51
Santa trying to the, the evil Santa in the beginning trying to find Billy
11:55
in the woods, you don't really Yeah.
11:58
Like come here boy and all that.
11:59
You don't, I feel like it's an indication that he, in my opinion, he killed the
12:04
Santa 'cause you see the knife bleeding, you see the hand of the Santa Claus
12:09
repeatedly, but there's that trauma and how did he make it out of it alive?
12:15
I think he kind of had let that persona out and they don't really cover it.
12:20
I mean, I wanna hear your thoughts on it, but that was my thought.
12:23
Kearns: I think he
12:24
Ryan: I would,
12:26
Jon: Yeah, I think he hid, I think, Des Santa finally like, sort of snapped out
12:30
of his murderous fugue, whatever that, and
12:35
Kearns: by
12:36
Jon: like logic says, I, I gotta get outta here because, um, one
12:42
car came through, another one's going to potentially too, so.
12:46
Kearns: outta there.
12:47
The kid's a lost cause kind of thing
12:49
Ryan: Okay.
12:50
Jon: Yeah, I mean, you're, now talking triple murder, so it's, you know, because
12:55
he kills the convenience store guy.
12:59
Yeah.
12:59
84 and somewhere in what looks like the Midwest, that's a trip to death row.
13:05
Kearns: sleep last night, so I turned on the Green Mile.
13:07
Don't do that.
13:08
It's a three hour long movie and you, nobody wants to go to sleep
13:11
before, like John Coffee's at least gets his ride out under the
13:16
stars to go save the lady, right?
13:18
So that's like two hours and 10 minutes into the movie.
13:20
Don't do that.
13:21
Don't watch the green Mile.
13:23
But it does, it has that nice like feeling to it where it just makes you want to
13:26
go to sleep nostalgic and all that.
13:28
Um,
13:29
Ryan: Thanksgiving
13:29
Jon: Mm-hmm.
13:30
Ryan: right there.
13:31
Forget about playing streets and automobiles.
13:33
Watch the Green Mile.
13:34
Kearns: wet the sponge scene in that movie where he, Percy doesn't wet the sponge and
13:39
the guy just fries like it's lit on fire.
13:43
Ryan: Rough.
13:44
Kearns: chair is a wild concept.
13:46
Like, why not just shoot somebody at that point?
13:49
It's way, way more humane.
13:51
Ryan: Don't, don't they shoot 'em?
13:53
I'm trying to remember.
13:53
It's been a while.
13:54
Kearns: don't shoot.
13:55
No.
13:55
They just, they
13:55
Ryan: They just let 'em, right.
13:57
Okay.
13:57
Kearns: rolling it on to finish the job because they have to.
14:01
Ryan: Rough.
14:02
rough scene.
14:03
Kearns: The show must go on.
14:07
It is a rough scene.
14:08
story filled with rough moments, much like this movie actually, but
14:12
getting back to it, public execution.
14:15
Jon: do you guys wanna lighten up with a game before we dive into some of the
14:18
more brutal aspects of Silent Night?
14:20
Deadly night,
14:21
Kearns: don't wanna lighten up
14:22
Jon: I,
14:23
Kearns: because I know Ryan's gonna
14:24
Jon: I have a game for you.
14:25
Ryan: I haven't won because of my picks and all that.
14:28
You know?
14:29
It just,
14:30
Jon: This is, we're back to the tossup.
14:33
this is a real or fake.
14:35
Ryan: oh,
14:38
Jon: It's, it's real or fake Silent Night movies.
14:42
I don't know if you guys have ever just gone on IMDB or something and typed in
14:46
Silent Night, but there are about 50 movies with Silent Night in the title.
14:53
Ryan: Like
14:53
Jon: At least.
14:54
Ryan: you
14:54
Jon: At least
14:55
Ryan: out names.
14:56
Kearns: one's like a hip hop movie.
14:59
about, about playing basketball in the cages in the South Bronx.
15:02
I hope one's
15:03
Ryan: Well, that's the first one.
15:04
No, I'm joking.
15:06
Jon: I, I stuck.
15:07
with ones that are mostly in line with what we do.
15:12
There are dramas, there are romances, there's a couple comedies mixed in there.
15:16
So these are real or fake Silent night movies.
15:19
And we will start off with one that's simply called Silent Night.
15:24
And as as we do a grieving mute, father Exacts bloody revenge against
15:31
a ruthless gang who killed his son.
15:34
Ryan: Hmm.
15:34
Kearns: Kyle Knight.
15:34
What was the title?
15:37
Jon: Silent.
15:38
Just Silent Night.
15:41
Ryan: Fake.
15:45
Jon: This is real.
15:46
It's a John Woo movie.
15:48
Kearns: I Reason why I
15:49
Jon: It,
15:50
Kearns: on Amazon once.
15:51
Jon: I really enjoyed it.
15:52
Actually, I watched it last year-ish.
15:58
Last year.
15:58
I think maybe the, yeah, I watched it around Christmas
16:01
within the last two years.
16:02
Ryan: like it's hard boiled.
16:04
Kearns: Only?
16:05
yeah, it probably is.
16:06
Did W Do Only God forgives.
16:09
Was that John Wu with my guy, the Gze?
16:13
Jon: Am not sure.
16:13
Kearns: see, because that's not even close.
16:17
Ryan: Yeah.
16:17
No, the
16:18
Kearns: even
16:18
Ryan: only John Wu movie I know is Hardboiled and the hospital scene, if
16:22
it's the same, it's the same John Wu.
16:23
Right.
16:24
Okay.
16:24
Alright.
16:25
Jon: Yeah.
16:26
Ryan: All I can see is like Christmas lights flying everywhere.
16:28
Explosions.
16:30
Like
16:30
Kearns: Yeah.
16:32
Ryan: again speared with a Christmas tree star like that.
16:37
Actually, the hard boil came up the other day.
16:39
Uh, Thanksgiving yesterday we were talking about it.
16:43
Kearns: God.
16:43
John Wu did Face Off.
16:45
Ryan: Yeah.
16:45
Kearns: could I forget that?
16:46
Jon: Yep.
16:48
Yep.
16:48
Ryan: Cage for your holiday pleasure.
16:51
Kearns: Oh, hard Target.
16:53
Hell yes.
16:53
John Wu.
16:56
Jon: John W's made some bangers, man.
16:58
Kearns: um, also an underrated film.
17:02
Slater, John Travolta.
17:05
Travolta as a villain is always fun.
17:07
Ryan: yeah,
17:09
Jon: Mm-hmm.
17:11
Kearns: Oh, I guess we gotta keep playing the game.
17:12
I'm just gonna keep looking at John movies.
17:14
Jon: Wait, was Broken Arrow, John Travolta or Nicholas Cage?
17:17
Kearns: Travolta and Christian Slater.
17:19
Was it, uh, like you making a face off reference?
17:23
Jon: I'm making a face off joke.
17:25
Yes.
17:25
Ryan: Nick Cage.
17:26
Kearns: was, oh God.
17:28
It, how can I not remember the guy's name in faceoff, the bad guy.
17:32
Played by
17:33
Ryan: Um,
17:33
Jon: Oh, sh
17:36
Kearns: He's got such
17:36
Jon: Oh, and it's a like a,
17:40
Kearns: Cheating immediately.
17:41
Jon: it's like a perfect one too.
17:44
Kearns: Caster.
17:44
Jon: Yes.
17:46
Ryan: Yes,
17:46
Kearns: Caster.
17:47
Troy in Broken Arrow.
17:48
Ryan: that
17:49
Kearns: Replacement Killer.
17:50
Another
17:51
Jon: Okay.
17:53
Ryan: John was got a hit list.
17:55
Jon: Movie number two.
17:56
Real or fake?
17:57
This one's a callback.
17:58
To a previous time we played this game
18:00
Kearns: I'm
18:00
Jon: 'cause it might be a sequel.
18:04
Silent Night Wolf, Helen Keller Returns in the battle of a Lifetime against
18:11
a resurgent group of night wolves.
18:15
Kearns: If you came up with that, John, we have to have a talk
18:22
about how your creative genius is being squandered.
18:31
it's fake.
18:34
Ryan: Ah
18:34
Jon: It is fake.
18:36
Kearns: John.
18:37
Ryan: That's a good one.
18:39
Kearns: John.
18:39
That's great.
18:43
Jon: I don't even think that's the best one I came up with, but we'll see.
18:46
Kearns: with Helen Keller is the main character is pretty epic.
18:50
Not gonna lie
18:51
Ryan: It's a good title too.
18:53
Kearns: because its sequel is
18:54
Jon: All right,
18:55
Kearns: Wolf.
18:58
Jon: let, let's give you guys another potential sequel.
19:02
Silent Night.
19:03
Deadly Night Five.
19:05
The toy maker.
19:07
A toy maker, is creating toys, not for the joy of children, but to kill them.
19:13
Kearns: I would, that would be this franchise.
19:16
Ryan: Hmm
19:16
Jon: Yep.
19:17
Kearns: Five.
19:20
Jon: Five.
19:21
Ryan: hmm.
19:23
Kearns: Your poker face is annoying.
19:25
Um,
19:26
Ryan: Who's
19:27
Kearns: his, look at you.
19:29
So I don't look at John 'cause I psych myself out trying to figure
19:31
out if he's holding something back.
19:34
A fifth movie in this franchise
19:37
Ryan: I am gonna take a chance and say real.
19:40
Kearns: I think somebody would try to cash in and just kick the can through
19:44
five to 10 movies with this name real.
19:50
Ryan: It's,
19:50
Jon: is real and it's stars.
19:53
One of the biggest critics of the original Mickey Rooney, who called the
19:58
original filmmaker Scum for making it.
20:03
Ryan: Yep.
20:04
Jon: Yep, he is.
20:06
And then he cashed, he needed some ca quick cash, I guess.
20:09
Kearns: had to pay off some gambling debts to the Albanians.
20:14
Ryan: It's funny, he, uh, did, uh,
20:15
Kearns: any movie when the Albanians are involved.
20:18
Ryan: the dis, the Disney movie,
20:19
Jon: Yep.
20:20
Ryan: fandom of the movie house, no,
20:24
Kearns: I didn't see that one.
20:26
Jon: I remember.
20:26
I don't remember if I saw that or not.
20:29
Ryan: Disney, later Disney films.
20:31
I was a kid when that came out,
20:33
Jon: Mm-hmm.
20:34
Ryan: but I.
20:36
Jon: Okay.
20:37
You ready for the next one?
20:40
Silent Night.
20:42
Fatal Night.
20:44
A presumed dead mystery writer begins posting on social media,
20:49
leading some to believe she is alive.
20:52
Ryan: Hmm.
20:54
Kearns: Could be John to throw us off the scent.
20:56
'cause these are usually like sick
20:58
Ryan: Yeah.
20:58
Kearns: demented.
20:59
That one's very I think that's, I think that's fake.
21:03
Ryan: I'm gonna go with fake two on that one.
21:07
Show
21:07
Jon: That one's real.
21:08
Kearns: streak
21:13
Jon: All right, we'll see.
21:14
We'll see if you can get, get back on the winning side with Silent Night,
21:18
zombie night, the 12 days of Christmas.
21:22
Turn into a nightmare in LA when the dead rise.
21:26
Ryan: with zombie films,
21:28
Kearns: real.
21:28
Ryan: he is,
21:31
Kearns: That's
21:31
Jon: It is real.
21:32
Ryan: say, gonna say.
21:33
Kearns: Yeah.
21:33
You a little pep in your step reading
21:35
Ryan: Yeah.
21:35
Kearns: off.
21:38
Jon: It's so bad.
21:39
Even I don't like that one.
21:42
Ryan: You love all
21:43
Jon: Yeah, it's rough.
21:45
It's rough.
21:46
all right, so we'll go with a silent night of the blood suckers.
21:52
Kearns: Fake.
21:53
It's
21:54
Jon: A cl a Cleveland apartment complex is under siege by a group
21:59
of hungry, desperate vampires, thirsting for blood and eggnog.
22:06
Kearns: I'm sticking with fake
22:08
Ryan: damn it.
22:09
Jon: It's fake.
22:10
Kearns: and eggnog under siege part though.
22:14
It would've been cool if you like slipped in a little Steven Segal reference there.
22:17
That would've been fun.
22:18
Jon: Mm-hmm.
22:19
Kearns: been good times.
22:21
Do do
22:22
Jon: Okay.
22:24
Kearns: I need a better setup?
22:25
My two
22:26
Jon: We will go with
22:29
Silent Knight.
22:32
Hey.
22:33
N-I-G-H-T.
22:37
Um,
22:39
Kearns: day.
22:40
like a,
22:41
Jon: silent.
22:42
Silent Knight.
22:43
With a K. With a K like the, yeah.
22:49
Yep.
22:49
Silent Ken Night an aging knight must fight off hordes of undead
22:54
invaders and defend the English crown.
22:58
Ryan: That sounds so good too.
23:00
Kearns: yeah.
23:01
Ryan: it, John.
23:02
Kearns: There was a time when that movie would've been run on like channel 27,
23:06
Ryan: Yeah,
23:08
Kearns: o'clock in the afternoon.
23:10
Start time.
23:13
Um, damnit,
23:16
Ryan: I'm gonna, Hmm,
23:18
Kearns: I want it to be real.
23:19
Ryan: I'm gonna say fake.
23:20
I'm trying to get some points in the later end, but I don't know.
23:24
Kearns: I want it to be real.
23:25
I'm gonna stick with real then since you're trying to get points.
23:27
I'll give you a shot, but it's probably fake.
23:31
Yeah,
23:32
Jon: fake.
23:32
Ryan: though.
23:35
Throwing some King Arthur against
23:36
Jon: Mm-hmm.
23:38
Ryan: Morgan Lafe.
23:39
Sorry,
23:40
Kearns: I mean, yeah, there you go.
23:42
Jon: Okay.
23:43
A silent night, unholy night.
23:49
Kevin receives an old book from his great-grandfather.
23:53
Little does he know that the book is actually a guide to summoning demons.
24:01
Kearns: What a twist.
24:04
Jon: What a twist.
24:06
Kearns: I want that one to be real too.
24:07
So I'm going with
24:08
Ryan: I am gonna go with reel two.
24:10
Kearns: Omic ka ka
24:11
Ryan: Uh, yeah, Kevin,
24:14
Jon: It's fake.
24:16
Ryan: mentioning
24:17
Jon: big.
24:17
Ryan: sequel.
24:17
Jon: I legitimately didn't even think about home alone when I
24:20
made the, the character, Kevin.
24:23
It just, I was just trying to come up with a fairly basic name.
24:27
Ryan: ComicCon.
24:29
So
24:30
Jon: Mm-hmm.
24:30
Kearns: is probably my favorite thing
24:31
Jon: Okay.
24:32
Kearns: long time.
24:34
Let's go to Necro ComicCon this year.
24:38
Jon: Yeah.
24:39
Ryan: free,
24:42
Jon: Okay, we have two left.
24:44
We have Silent night, bloody night, two siblings return home after a death, and
24:52
learn of Santa's evil brother, black Peter, and the town's even darker.
24:58
Real secret.
24:59
Ryan: fake.
25:03
Kearns: One's even darker.
25:05
Real secret.
25:05
Would John ever write that?
25:08
Jon: I mean, I definitely wrote it because it's on the screen.
25:11
Kearns: described
25:12
Ryan: typed it,
25:13
Kearns: um, real.
25:16
I Nice.
25:18
Ryan: man, sorry,
25:19
Kearns: I don't think he would write that.
25:21
That's not how you write real secret.
25:23
Mm. I don't think John would put that down.
25:28
Jon: Okay,
25:30
last one.
25:33
Silent Night, full Moon, Christmas Eve, and a full moon spell disaster for Clara.
25:42
As the family gathers and she has to navigate relationships, a
25:46
transformation and an overwhelming urge to feast on Grandma Emma,
25:51
Ryan: be real.
25:52
Kearns: want to eat?
25:53
Grandma?
25:53
Am I right?
25:56
Innuendo?
25:57
Anything you guys want on that?
25:58
I don't care.
25:59
Ryan: It's part of the curse
26:01
Kearns: It could be cranberry sauce.
26:05
Age to perfection like Peru.
26:09
Ryan: just sliced.
26:11
Kearns: Hmm.
26:12
I.
26:12
Ryan: Only $120 at Costco?
26:15
Or is that the ham?
26:18
I saw that carving ham, but I digress.
26:21
Kearns: that's not 120 bucks right now.
26:23
Ryan: Uh
26:23
Kearns: Spiral on you.
26:24
Ryan: oh.
26:25
No, no.
26:25
It's like, uh, the sandy ham and you just slice it.
26:28
The fancy ham.
26:30
Kearns: Yeah.
26:31
Okay.
26:31
Ryan: no.
26:32
Kearns: just a regular honey ham would for that price would
26:35
make things are really bad.
26:36
If that's the case, 120 bucks.
26:38
Ryan: Listen.
26:40
Jon: Mm-hmm.
26:41
Ryan: Spend 400 for a free one.
26:43
Kearns: real.
26:45
Ryan: I'm gonna go with reel.
26:45
I'm going with currents.
26:47
It's fake.
26:49
my
26:49
Jon: That one,
26:53
that one is fake.
26:54
So we wind up six three Kerns.
26:57
Kearns: my streak continues.
27:01
Jon: Yeah.
27:01
Ryan: I feel like Cobra Commander.
27:04
Get my revenge shows.
27:08
Kearns: Oh, right, it's back to Silent Night.
27:11
Deadly night.
27:12
Ryan: Yeah.
27:12
Kearns: game,
27:12
Ryan: need, I'm telling you,
27:14
Jon: Night.
27:14
Ryan: Productions, some of these fake movies.
27:17
We got this B movies.
27:20
how we do it.
27:22
Kearns: There was a dude across from my booth who sells, um, a bunch of
27:25
movies his production company makes, there, uh, the everybody who was
27:30
around me who shower remain nameless was just like, no, his movie suck.
27:33
And he's here every year.
27:34
He buys reboot spaces, he puts 'em all up, people buy 'em.
27:37
And every year everybody's pissed.
27:40
Ryan: Like we,
27:40
Jon: Mm-hmm.
27:41
Ryan: it's like $50 a movie.
27:43
Movie.
27:43
It's horrible.
27:44
Kearns: that.
27:46
Just get them out there.
27:46
Shove 'em out there.
27:47
But Silent Night, deadly Nights.
27:49
Um, you said it's independent.
27:50
I didn't realize that.
27:52
Ryan: It's, I feel like it's a, based on how they filmed it, um, what was the,
27:57
Kearns: don't know for sure
27:58
Ryan: well.
27:59
Kearns: if it's iny.
28:00
Ryan: Based on the budget, 750,000, uh, distributed by Pictures,
28:06
but the production company was Sleigh Ride Productions, Inc.
28:10
I have not heard of Sleigh Ride
28:12
Jon: Yeah.
28:12
Ryan: Inc. Doing any other films besides this
28:15
Jon: No,
28:15
Ryan: Yeah,
28:16
Jon: no.
28:17
Ryan: yeah.
28:17
Kearns: so the production value
28:18
Jon: Yeah, I,
28:19
Kearns: this don't scream high, big dollars.
28:21
Like,
28:22
Ryan: No.
28:23
Kearns: you see a movie
28:23
Jon: no.
28:25
Kearns: with very low budget and, you see how their camera
28:28
work is, and you see this, a
28:31
Jon: Mm-hmm.
28:31
Kearns: It's very like late seventies again.
28:33
It's weird that it's 84 because it feels very seventies.
28:35
The whole movie
28:36
Ryan: Yes.
28:37
Jon: Yeah.
28:38
Kearns: are very muted.
28:39
The
28:39
Jon: Mm-hmm.
28:40
Kearns: Um,
28:41
Ryan: During your guys,
28:42
Kearns: and not a way where they're trying to highlight the red of a
28:45
costume, like the Santa costume.
28:46
Just, everything's muted.
28:47
It's weird.
28:49
Ryan: your guys watch, did you notice how the film would go from like a clear
28:52
picture to a graininess in certain scenes?
28:55
Kearns: Yes.
28:56
Jon: did you guys watch the directors cut?
28:59
Kearns: I did not.
29:00
Ryan: I believe that's the one I
29:01
Jon: Okay.
29:01
Because there's two, there's the one that's an hour and 19 minutes is
29:07
the theatrical, and then the other one is like an hour and 24 minutes.
29:12
And that it, it's very noticeable in the director's cut
29:16
Ryan: It pops out in there.
29:18
Jon: that they just, I think it just wasn't as produced because
29:21
they were cutting it and then
29:24
Ryan: had a, they were trying,
29:25
Jon: later on it got added back in.
29:28
Ryan: this movie quickly.
29:29
Um, it's one of those Halloween, Friday 13th copies, Tristar
29:34
trying to make a, make a quick
29:36
Jon: Yeah.
29:36
Ryan: on it.
29:37
'cause I mean, who at that time had like Universal, had horror films?
29:41
Paramount definitely had horror films.
29:43
Tristar just went to jump.
29:44
Kearns: so different.
29:45
I guess Friday the 13th qualifies a little bit as more visceral because
29:49
of the death of a child and stuff.
29:51
And now it's like kind of a revenge flick.
29:52
Jon: Mm-hmm.
29:54
Kearns: But this is like
29:54
Jon: Mm-hmm.
29:55
Kearns: kind of slasher than anything.
29:57
That's, I mean, what else was coming out around that time
29:59
that had this sort of messaging?
30:02
Ryan: Not that much.
30:03
I mean, 84, you had the supposed last Friday, the 13th coming out, you had
30:08
Dream Warriors, which was supposed to be the last nightmare on Elm Street.
30:12
So you had a lot of
30:13
Kearns: were way more fun than this.
30:15
Ryan: Oh yeah.
30:16
'cause the character and
30:17
Kearns: Yeah.
30:18
This is not, I mean, not just 'cause of the character.
30:20
This is a dark movie.
30:22
You're not rooting for
30:23
Jon: yeah.
30:24
Ryan: you feel sorrow.
30:25
Kearns: you're, you're kind of like watching a car accident.
30:29
That's what this movie sort of feels like.
30:31
Jon: Mm-hmm.
30:31
Kearns: this dude's life spin outta control.
30:35
Ryan: Yeah.
30:36
Jon: Yeah.
30:37
And like with a lot of eighties slashers, you get the moral majority pandering.
30:42
Like this person had sex, they have to die, this person
30:46
did drugs, they have to die.
30:47
And there's some of that in Silent night.
30:49
Deadly night.
30:50
But then there's also like three of the four people in the store.
30:56
He didn't have to kill,
30:57
Ryan: have to kill the owner.
30:58
He didn't have to kill, uh, the woman who, who's trying to hook up with the owner.
31:05
I mean, Pam didn't have to die.
31:08
I think that was just jealousy.
31:09
The, the other guy.
31:10
Yeah, he, he had to go.
31:13
Jon: I think Pam dies because she's not grateful that he,
31:18
saved her from that dude.
31:20
Ryan: Yeah.
31:21
I, I mean,
31:22
Jon: That's probably Billy's best moment of acting is showing the hurt when he's
31:26
like, but wait, I saved you from him assaulting you and you're not thankful
31:32
Kearns: Because nothing goes his
31:33
Jon: and
31:33
Kearns: nothing.
31:34
He, never pans out anything that could push the needle towards hero from villain.
31:39
Nothing ever works.
31:41
And none of it's ever Billy's fault, really.
31:43
How Billy reacts is a different matter.
31:45
We're not like, you know, saying
31:47
Jon: Yeah.
31:47
Yeah,
31:48
Kearns: in incel
31:48
Jon: yeah.
31:49
Kearns: but he like,
31:52
Jon: Absolutely.
31:52
Kearns: they're saying here.
31:53
Jon: he's also 18.
31:55
He hasn't had time to process this as an adult and he's been in a, Catholic
32:01
orphanage for the last, like 12 years,
32:05
Kearns: kind
32:06
Jon: 10 years.
32:06
Kearns: let's get into the other antagonist of this
32:09
besides Killer Santo one.
32:11
And that's, mother Superior, or what is it?
32:13
Sister Psycho.
32:15
Ryan: The penguin
32:17
Kearns: She, she's gonna beat him at one point for seeing two people
32:21
having sex, is one of my favorite
32:24
Jon: Mm-hmm.
32:25
Kearns: like, wow, if that's not gonna traumatize you, I don't know what will.
32:28
Ryan: y Yeah.
32:29
That was tough.
32:30
I was like, the, the kid doesn't deserve any of this.
32:32
And mean, sister Margaret tries, but Mother Superior, because of her power and
32:37
all that, she feels this is the right way.
32:40
And it, messes him up even worse.
32:42
And it's sad.
32:43
Jon: Well, yeah, I mean, she ignores the clear signs of trauma in his
32:48
artwork and say, oh, no, he doesn't remember what happened to him.
32:52
I mean, he's drawn Santa with his head cut off.
32:54
He remember something.
32:55
Ryan: And the reindeer
32:59
Jon: Mm-hmm.
32:59
Ryan: blood everywhere.
33:00
Kearns: everybody.
33:01
Ryan: He's like, see.
33:05
Jon: I mean, I think he seems to remember
33:07
Ryan: I mean,
33:08
Jon: he,
33:08
Ryan: you?
33:09
Jon: if he,
33:12
yeah, no, I mean, unless Ricky wouldn't remember, like that's,
33:17
that's how you don't remember is being an a baby when it happens.
33:23
Kearns: this is a cycle of trauma.
33:25
This movie's about the cycle of trauma for sure.
33:28
I mean, we could equate it to Frankenstein for that and things like that.
33:31
Ryan: Yeah,
33:32
Kearns: talking about like the father son relationship, the
33:35
parent child relationship, the cycle of trauma, all that stuff.
33:38
Jon: Mm-hmm.
33:38
Kearns: is definitely a movie about that.
33:40
And it's very in your face and it's not redeeming at all.
33:44
Ryan: no.
33:45
Kearns: It's blames
33:46
Jon: Mm-hmm.
33:47
Kearns: 100% for what Billy does.
33:51
Jon: Absolutely.
33:52
Absolutely.
33:53
And I mean, even from the beginning, Billy's gonna wind up with some
33:57
Christmas trauma, even if mom and dad don't get killed on the way home
34:00
from the nursing home after his weird interaction with his grandfather.
34:04
Kearns: scene in the movie, by the way,
34:07
Ryan: a quick turn
34:07
Kearns: his
34:08
Jon: Love that scene.
34:09
Kearns: bore, and then as soon as they leave the room, he is like, come here.
34:12
Let me tell you about the scariest night of the year.
34:16
It's so good.
34:17
Ryan: and he
34:18
Jon: He punishes them.
34:19
Ryan: it 10 times better.
34:21
Kearns: Well, the fact that he predicts
34:22
Jon: Yeah.
34:23
Kearns: horrible is going to happen via Santa Claus and then Santa Murders,
34:28
his mom and dad is very bizarre.
34:31
Jon: Mm-hmm.
34:31
Kearns: Hollywood, I
34:32
Jon: Yeah.
34:33
Ryan: They had to lead it in the inciting
34:34
Jon: Yeah.
34:35
Ryan: How do we get, to this point?
34:37
Kearns: not believable.
34:38
Like there's no reason for him.
34:40
He's not like a soothsayer or anything.
34:42
It's just a crazy kooky grandpa.
34:45
Ryan: Suits air.
34:46
Jon: it's just, just the crazy ranting of an old guy in a nursing
34:49
home who pretends he can't talk
34:52
Kearns: The suspension of disbelief that you have to go through for those
34:55
first two scenes is pretty insane,
34:57
Ryan: Well,
34:57
Kearns: but.
34:57
Ryan: I feel like that's how they, it's how, of course they
35:00
illustrate how Billy breaks.
35:02
It's like grandfather watching his parents die.
35:06
You know, mother Superior, what's right, what's wrong?
35:10
You know?
35:11
And I could eve hold it together.
35:14
Yeah.
35:15
But he breaks.
35:17
He breaks when he sees Pamela and the fake, uh, Dan.
35:22
Oh, John.
35:23
I'm trying to figure his name from welcome back.
35:25
Der, but John Travolta, the fake.
35:26
John Travolta.
35:32
Jon: the, the fake short, John Travolta.
35:36
Oh.
35:37
Ryan: Andy.
35:38
Kearns: The
35:39
Ryan: Andy.
35:41
Kearns: No good, no good,
35:43
Ryan: Travolta.
35:45
Kearns: but.
35:46
I mean, there's not too much to dissect past that.
35:50
What other movies can you think of from that time period?
35:52
Guys that go into the cycle of trauma kind of thing?
35:56
The parent Um, it's not like the omen doesn't qualify.
36:04
It doesn't even have to be horror, because I think you're gonna have
36:06
to dig deep for this a little bit.
36:08
Like this movie goes really far into this realm and I don't think I've seen a movie.
36:14
I don't think I've ever seen a movie that goes this far into that whole topic.
36:17
I'm trying to
36:17
Ryan: Well, thinking of, you know, here's a good question for you guys.
36:21
You know, maybe the controversy wasn't like, okay, the blood, the gore, all that,
36:26
but maybe the, and you know, the depiction of Santa being a killer, but maybe the
36:30
controversy was the deep message, like,
36:33
Kearns: That's what I
36:33
Ryan: yeah.
36:34
Kearns: They clutch their pearls at, at what they were saying with this movie,
36:39
Jon: Mm-hmm.
36:39
Mm-hmm.
36:41
Kearns: Because it's, that's a hard pill to swallow for a bunch
36:43
of Paul Mall smoking parents
36:45
Ryan: yeah,
36:45
Kearns: their kids and don't know where they are at 10 o'clock at
36:48
night when the commercial comes on
36:50
Jon: Mm-hmm.
36:50
Kearns: 'em
36:51
Ryan: yeah,
36:52
Kearns: like then.
36:52
Then they watch this movie that basically is screaming at them,
36:56
your kid's gonna be fucked up.
36:58
Ryan: yeah.
37:00
Jon: Yep.
37:00
You're your kid up
37:02
Kearns: think
37:02
Jon: big time.
37:03
Kearns: why people didn't like, or the certain people didn't like this movie
37:06
Ryan: Yep.
37:06
Kearns: even the people who
37:07
Jon: Mm-hmm.
37:08
Kearns: didn't love this movie in the beginning.
37:10
Right.
37:10
Jon: I think it's definitely become more beloved over time
37:14
Kearns: was so hated.
37:15
Right.
37:16
sort of the way the pendulum swings.
37:18
Jon: that.
37:19
Probably.
37:20
Yeah.
37:20
Like, and they, like you have the people like me who, you know, were there when
37:25
the controversy started around this movie and were desperate to see it.
37:29
And you saw it and it kind of lived up to it because, you
37:33
know, I saw it at 14, 15 maybe.
37:37
You know?
37:37
So it's like, whoa, this is, so now it hangs on with a lot
37:42
of people as a nostalgia piece.
37:44
Kearns: When you see something at 14, that's like a gr, any kind of gripping
37:47
movie, it stays with you for life.
37:49
Ryan: Yeah.
37:50
Kearns: And this
37:50
Jon: Mm-hmm.
37:51
Kearns: things that
37:51
Jon: And then,
37:54
Kearns: but a
37:54
Jon: mm-hmm.
37:55
Kearns: parents get
37:55
Jon: And, and then it's,
37:57
Kearns: for example,
37:58
Jon: Yeah.
37:58
I think there's another Christmas movie, A Killer.
38:01
Interestingly, a Killer Santa sort of dives into how the.
38:06
These childhood traumas grow into the adult issues is Christmas Evil,
38:11
which is not just a good horror movie, not just a good Christmas movie,
38:15
but Christmas Evil is a good movie.
38:20
Kearns: better than Silent Night.
38:21
Deadly night.
38:24
Ryan: Hmm.
38:24
Jon: I think so.
38:25
I think so.
38:26
Ryan: Okay.
38:27
Jon: lo I love Silent Night.
38:28
Deadly Night.
38:30
And like I said, a lot of it it's is the nostalgia.
38:32
I didn't see Christmas Evil till later, so it came, I came into it with like
38:37
a, all right, let's see what this is.
38:39
It blew me away, like for what it is, for the budget for the time.
38:43
It's really, really, really well done.
38:47
And you know, spoiler, it might come back up again in this episode.
38:51
Ryan: Late seventies,
38:52
Kearns: boy.
38:54
Ryan: it came out.
38:55
Jon: I believe it.
38:57
I believe Christmas Eve was 80 or 81.
38:59
Ryan: So here, here, here's, like from my film brain right now, what
39:05
makes this more controversial?
39:07
This movie, silent Night, deadly Night compared to Christmas Evil.
39:10
Like why didn't Christmas evil get that much hype when it came out?
39:14
Jon: I think some of it was distribution.
39:17
I think it's the ad campaign too.
39:20
Like it, I
39:21
Ryan: Okay.
39:22
Jon: I sent you guys a clip from Cisco and Ebert talking about this.
39:25
maybe I didn't.
39:27
But one of the things that Cisco brings up right off the bat is
39:31
how repulsive he found the ad campaign with Santa holding an ax.
39:36
number one, I don't know what kind of release Christmas Evil even got, but
39:40
it definitely didn't get that kind of ad campaign where for a week it's
39:44
Santa picking up an ax and people are getting mad every time they see it.
39:49
Ryan: Okay.
39:50
Kearns: Okay.
39:50
Ryan: I gotcha.
39:51
So maybe Christmas Eve was more like when video rental stores were
39:55
became more popular, you could find it there like the mom and pop ones
39:59
and say, okay, this is interesting.
40:00
Jon: that four or so years between release dates is pretty important too.
40:05
Probably.
40:06
'cause you know, 80, 81, you don't have a ton of video stores.
40:10
They're just sort of starting to pop up.
40:13
But by 84, 85, they're pretty much everywhere.
40:18
Ryan: Yeah.
40:19
I, you know, growing up in the time where it's like blockbusters here and
40:23
then Hollywood videos here, and then you got two mom and pop stores here and
40:27
there, it's like you had room to go.
40:31
It's that had to suck back in the day.
40:33
Sorry.
40:34
I can't imagine that.
40:36
Jon: I mean by the time I was able to go and get movies on my own,
40:40
there were plenty of places to go
40:43
Kearns: Yeah.
40:43
Jon: There were probably six or seven places within like five
40:47
or six miles of where I grew up.
40:51
Maybe more May because, I mean because,
40:54
Kearns: big ones.
40:54
Well, one was little, one was big, You went to one stop or
40:58
you went to Blockbuster, right.
41:00
Was there a
41:01
Jon: yep.
41:02
Kearns: somewhere?
41:03
Um, on I'm not thinking of.
41:06
Within sort of, within like two miles.
41:08
Let's say Blockbuster's about two miles.
41:11
Jon: now that would, that was probably, those were probably the pinnacle.
41:17
There was, you know, there was one in the mall for a long time that was really cool.
41:22
That was the first one that had the, the back room with the beaded curtain in
41:26
front of it that you couldn't go into.
41:29
Um, but they, like everybody, there was one out by the bowling alley.
41:33
There was, there were like a hand.
41:36
There were a handful of little ones in like convenience stores.
41:40
We're renting them.
41:42
I mean, when I was in my early twenties, I worked in a video
41:48
store inside of a stop and shop.
41:50
Like they were just video stores were everywhere.
41:53
Ryan: App Shop.
41:55
Kearns: You had to
41:56
Jon: Yeah.
41:56
Kearns: four times in order to get your investment back, and then
42:01
everything's profit after that.
42:02
Right?
42:02
Because 20 bucks a 1999 purchase.
42:04
They probably got 'em cheaper too.
42:06
1999 purchase 4
42:08
Jon: Pretty much.
42:09
Kearns: rental.
42:10
Jon: Well, I don't, I mean, I don't know because if you, even
42:13
when I was working in them, the wholesale prices on them were insane.
42:17
Kearns: Or high.
42:18
Jon: oh yeah.
42:18
They would think they were charging like 70, $80 per, so you had, to get like
42:24
quantities of these big releases or else.
42:28
You know, you're, you're spending $80 for a copy of Terminator, or
42:33
it's like, you know, 10 copies for like 400 or something, so,
42:38
Ryan: that VHS was like $80.
42:40
I mean, I remember like Titanic being like $40 on the two
42:44
pack side, but that was like
42:46
Jon: mm-hmm.
42:46
Ryan: expensive, maybe a $50 one, but never like an $80 VHS
42:51
unless it was like a box set
42:52
Jon: Yeah.
42:52
No, no.
42:53
Kearns: Jurassic Park, when it came out was 50 bucks.
42:56
I remember that.
42:56
My mom was like, no, that's a ludicrous amount of money.
43:01
And she was right too.
43:03
Jon: Yeah,
43:03
Kearns: of
43:03
Jon: yeah, yeah.
43:04
the dawn of the VCR days was not good for like, buying movies even like
43:11
in the early days, they retailed for way more than anyone would spend.
43:17
It was like, you know, you can record stuff off tv, you
43:20
can play your home movies.
43:22
Like that's what people were using VCRs for.
43:25
Kearns: The thing about it is, is it's, it's got this message.
43:31
It's, got the visceral scenes and everything.
43:33
It's not gratuitous in any way.
43:35
they don't do
43:36
Jon: Mm-hmm.
43:37
Kearns: easy, cheap feels thing.
43:39
There's a kid in orphanage and stuff like that, but they don't
43:42
use any of the cheap tricks.
43:44
it's not a slog to watch either.
43:45
It's like it paces and you can watch it and you're tracking with the
43:49
Jon: Mm-hmm.
43:51
Kearns: At no point in time did I ever care about anybody in this movie.
43:56
Ryan: even belly.
43:57
Kearns: I kind of wanted the nun to die for a while now.
44:00
I didn't care about Billy at all.
44:02
I never felt sad or like anything for Billy, and I feel like the movie
44:06
failed in some way to make that.
44:07
And I mean, I'm like a really empathetic guy when it comes to watching movies
44:11
Jon: Mm-hmm.
44:12
Kearns: So that to me, where I, I was like, I think that maybe where
44:15
this movie failed a little bit.
44:19
What do you think, John?
44:20
Ryan: Yeah.
44:21
Jon: Yeah, no, I can't argue that too much.
44:24
I really never felt empathy for Billy so much.
44:29
But I mean, it's also, you can find it if you sort of put it in context
44:35
to the time, like I said earlier, without therapy being a thing.
44:40
And he, you know, he's, he doesn't look 18, but he's 18 at, you know,
44:45
when he gets to the toy store,
44:47
Ryan: eight.
44:48
Jon: so he.
44:50
Yeah.
44:50
Yeah.
44:51
And you, like, you, you can say, yeah.
44:53
Oh, yeah.
44:53
At some point your mental health is your responsibility, and it certainly is, but
44:58
is it that way when you're 18 and you grew up in a, in an orphanage, a religious
45:02
orphanage, and you've never been really e even had your trauma acknowledged?
45:08
Kearns: the time period from filming that makes it a little
45:11
bit more muted and difficult.
45:12
Maybe it's that because I. It's not that I don't like care, like
45:18
I get it and I feel bad for 'em.
45:21
If I think about it, I'm like, wow, that would really suck and stuff,
45:24
but not while watching the movie.
45:25
At no point while watching the movie did I care.
45:29
I guess there's something they
45:30
Jon: Yeah.
45:30
Kearns: They did so much work building the backstory and
45:33
making sure we understood it.
45:35
I feel like they wanted us to be with Billy.
45:38
Ryan: Yeah.
45:38
Kearns: us to be
45:39
Jon: Mm-hmm.
45:39
Kearns: to chop off the nun's head at the end,
45:41
Ryan: Yep.
45:42
Kearns: which we kind of were because
45:43
Jon: Mm-hmm.
45:44
Kearns: but like for other reasons too,
45:46
Ryan: I wonder if.
45:47
Kearns: and be disappointed that he gets shot.
45:49
I didn't care.
45:49
I was like, okay, cool.
45:50
He's dead now.
45:51
What happens next?
45:53
Ryan: I wonder if you watched it a second time, if you'd feel something different.
45:57
'cause I feel like the first time it's like more shock value.
45:59
'cause you hear about all this controversy to see what makes
46:03
it so shocking that maybe the
46:05
Jon: Mm-hmm.
46:05
Ryan: it's like, okay, now I could get into the characterization more.
46:09
I don't know if you're gonna watch ever a
46:11
Jon: I think it maybe,
46:12
Kearns: I don't think I am.
46:13
It's
46:14
Jon: I think it maybe needs about, it needs, it needs
46:19
like maybe 10 or so minutes.
46:23
Like bef, after he gets to the toy store, after he gets in the Santa costume and
46:29
before he starts killing people to sort of, sort of explore where that comes from.
46:36
And it's, it's sort of, you know, Santa costume.
46:39
He does the, he does the day with the kids, they have the party
46:42
afterwards, everybody gets drunk and he starts killing people.
46:46
Ryan: Maybe the well he was drinking.
46:50
I was drinking.
46:51
That didn't help the situation either.
46:54
Kearns: True Alcohol doesn't tend to leave the great decision making.
46:59
That is fair.
47:00
Ryan: and
47:01
Kearns: generally multiple murders, but
47:03
Ryan: I mean
47:04
Kearns: somewhere in between.
47:06
Ryan: it's, it's a thin road on that based on his struggles.
47:10
And then we're mixing alcohol into it now, and the guy, Mr. Sims
47:13
is like, come on, just drink up.
47:15
It's okay.
47:16
Some good stuff, Billy.
47:18
Kearns: Yeah, he's funny.
47:19
That guy.
47:20
in everything too.
47:22
The, uh, there's a reason why the horror greats all watch this and reference this
47:27
movie all the time and things like that.
47:29
There's, something to it and it is a good story and it's definitely
47:32
an exploratory sort of story.
47:34
and it was great.
47:34
I'm so happy that you tied that together for the end.
47:37
So in the movie ends, Billy gets shot in the back by the sheriff twice before he
47:41
can kill Mother Superior with the Axe, who's in a wheelchair, at the moment.
47:46
So she can't, like, get away.
47:47
And then the way she throws his hand off the side of the chair is he's falling.
47:50
He grabs the chair and she casts
47:52
Jon: Mm.
47:52
Kearns: off.
47:53
She's such a piece of work and he, hits the ground and
47:56
it's a very miserable scene.
47:57
And then they, children have just watched.
48:00
Them kill
48:01
Ryan: Yeah,
48:02
Kearns: So they're all upset with her
48:05
Jon: Twice.
48:05
Kearns: just,
48:05
Ryan: the father,
48:07
Jon: Twice.
48:07
They get to see Stan killed twice.
48:10
Ryan: O'Brien, the guy was deaf of hearing.
48:13
They called him out, he couldn't hear, shot on the back twice In front of Ricky.
48:18
Kearns: points and goes nodding like that
48:22
Jon: Yep.
48:23
Kearns: and that's how it ends.
48:24
But I think the message at the end of there and that this could be
48:26
me reaching, but I think that's to show like gonna happen again.
48:30
Ryan: Yes.
48:31
Kearns: Ricky up
48:32
Jon: Mm-hmm.
48:32
Kearns: gonna be a psychopath.
48:34
Jon: Yep.
48:34
Ryan: And they foreshadow it
48:36
Jon: And
48:37
Ryan: 'cause Smothers.
48:38
Jon: Spoiler Silent Night.
48:39
Deadly Night, too.
48:40
Ryan: Oh yeah.
48:40
Mother Superior though.
48:41
Foreshadows it though because she says he's such a nice kid.
48:44
He's not gonna become like Billy.
48:46
And to be honest, if you'll mention the second one, I saw the second one first
48:50
as a kid, and you're right, you can watch the second one not have to watch
48:55
the first one 'cause it's just a repeat.
48:57
Jon: Absolutely.
48:58
Because about half or more of the second one is just clips from the
49:04
first one, and then it's Ricky yelling.
49:07
Garbage Day.
49:08
Ryan: that?
49:09
That's the movie
49:12
Jon: Yeah, that's the garbage day movie.
49:14
Ryan: Then I thought it was a separate movie
49:16
Jon: Yep.
49:16
Ryan: Garbage Day and
49:17
Jon: Yep.
49:17
Ryan: like, okay, this is a whole.
49:19
Jon: Nope, nope.
49:20
Day.
49:21
I haven't done enough of the reading to talk a lot about this,
49:24
but there was a big thing with that actor who's Eric Freeman after that
49:29
movie, he just sort of vanished.
49:31
There was a whole, like, basically from the start of Facebook up until a
49:36
few years ago, there was finding Eric Freeman pages, like trying to figure
49:41
out what happened to that dude and he eventually just turned up like, ah, I
49:47
just didn't feel like being in public.
49:48
Kearns: That's pretty cool actually.
49:50
That's like the say Britney Spears movement that
49:52
Jon: Yeah,
49:52
Kearns: on.
49:52
But for finding Eric Freeman,
49:56
Jon: yeah.
49:57
Finding some guy who was in one movie.
49:59
Ryan: been here the entire time.
50:00
Kearns: the community is something else, what they choose to chew into.
50:04
Yeah, everybody.
50:06
Jon: Mm-hmm.
50:06
Kearns: Night.
50:06
Deadly Night One, the original.
50:09
Um, we're a fan.
50:11
Jon: It spawns four sequels and two remakes, one coming out.
50:18
Around the time you're gonna hear this episode and one from 2012, which is sort
50:23
of a remake, but not really a remake.
50:26
I was reading about that earlier.
50:28
The guy that wrote it had never seen Silent Night, deadly Night.
50:32
So he based it off of like a real life incident and
50:37
Ryan: Malcolm McDowell.
50:38
Jon: it's not as much fun.
50:39
Yep.
50:39
Malcolm McDowell, um, Jamie King, Donald Logue.
50:44
Like, it's, I mean, it's, it's a cast, but it's, uh, it's not, it doesn't have any of
50:50
the things you enjoy about the original.
50:52
Ryan: I was gonna say the new one looks really good.
50:54
It's from the producers of Terra Fire.
50:57
Very close to the original, but I like the little twist with the girlfriend now.
51:02
Like, and, and the other idea that like, he, like he can be Billy, but
51:07
once he puts on the Santa suit, that's when he turns into someone else.
51:10
So there's a little more of a control on that personality.
51:15
Jon: Mm-hmm.
51:16
Well, that's the part that interests me, but also worries me about, uh, the remake
51:23
is you can very easily like, sway into natural born killers, California, like
51:32
Bonnie and Clyde, like all those, like this is just, we've seen this before.
51:37
Ryan: kind of on, I mean this movie's coming out first, but like that whole
51:41
Bonnie and Clyde idea has been popping up more because of Grant Theft Auto
51:44
Six coming out supposedly next year.
51:47
Also with the new movie The Bride, uh, with Christian Bale as the monster.
51:52
And I've.
51:53
Forget the actress who's playing the bride, but they're doing a Bonnie
51:57
and Clyde situation that film.
51:59
Kearns: cool.
52:00
Ryan: Yeah, it looks, it looks actually really good, set in the thirties, but,
52:03
the remake though, for this silent Night, deadly Night actually looks decent.
52:08
It looks, good, but I agree it can go south, like you said, and
52:11
be a, a generic copy something that everyone else is trying to
52:15
Jon: Yeah.
52:16
Ryan: again, that's what makes Hollywood keep going is
52:19
Kearns: shall
52:19
Ryan: on a copy.
52:21
Kearns: What about them top
52:22
Jon: Yep.
52:23
Kearns: fellas?
52:24
Ryan: Top Fives, oh man, well, top fives tonight.
52:27
I went with top five controversial movies the eighties, so I did some research.
52:34
Gentlemen, I did my homework.
52:35
I felt like I was in college again.
52:36
It was great.
52:37
And we're gonna start off with one of the more reviewed movies of the
52:43
eighties, and that's ReAnimator.
52:48
out of all the.
52:49
The top 10 movies I was researching, re animator pops up as number five.
52:54
And it's not, it's not because of the context, it's just the
52:58
one scene of a head giving head according to director Stewart Gordon.
53:05
it, it is the 40th anniversary, so happy anniversary to re animator.
53:09
But that was one of the most controversial scenes during the
53:13
eighties and re animator came out in 85.
53:16
of course amongst these other five, we have them all over.
53:19
But by 85, that was very controversial because of what was depicted.
53:23
But it's a phenomenal movie.
53:25
Nevertheless, my number four, oh, ReAnimator, oh, I, I can't wait
53:30
to have that 40th anniversary.
53:33
Just, I don't know, I might not even open it 'cause it's just, it
53:37
was outta print and now it's back.
53:38
But.
53:40
Uh, I
53:40
Jon: Mm-hmm.
53:41
Ryan: But this movie, this is another movie that caused controversy and I
53:44
actually had to do research 'cause it came out before Friday the 13th.
53:47
And they talk about Tom Snis, uh, practical effects, the gore in that.
53:52
But maniac I feel much gorier.
53:56
It's more in your face.
53:58
Um, yeah, exactly.
53:59
Thank you John.
54:00
'cause reading about it, they were like,
54:03
Jon: Mm-hmm.
54:04
Ryan: this, this Tom Sini phenomenal, but his effects blew everyone away.
54:08
And I'm like, maniac, I think did that first.
54:11
And when I did the research, I saw it came out first.
54:13
I mean, the controversy of
54:14
Jon: Mm.
54:15
Ryan: that killer running around New York City scalping woman and you know,
54:20
putting them on mannequins and making love it's controversy in its own right.
54:25
And it's, it's a, it's a great
54:27
Jon: Mm-hmm.
54:28
Ryan: It's, it's a good B movie.
54:29
Jon: Mm-hmm.
54:31
And it really, it really played on a lot of societal fears.
54:37
The seventies were big for serial killers, and New York was like, when maniac comes
54:43
out in 80, it's, yeah, it's not very long, far removed from the son of Sam.
54:49
Ryan: you know, I,
54:50
Jon: It's two and a half, three years since he was caught.
54:54
Ryan: time talking to, uh, my mother-in-law.
54:56
We talked one day there.
54:57
That was the fear.
54:58
Kearns: shitless.
54:59
Ryan: Yeah.
55:00
Kearns: Everybody was scared shitless.
55:01
Jon: Mm-hmm.
55:02
Ryan: you couldn't make a turn.
55:03
Like
55:04
Jon: Yep.
55:04
Ryan: used to carry, you know, a gun or a knife with them because
55:08
it was just like one wrong turn.
55:09
Anything could happen and they didn't know who he was.
55:13
Kearns: my mom was like 12, but some of her siblings were like 16, 17 of the
55:18
Makeout in a car age and in like White
55:21
Jon: Mm-hmm.
55:22
Kearns: which is really close to where Sam lived, he
55:24
Jon: Yeah.
55:24
Kearns: in the city.
55:25
But he lived in, uh, was it Yonkers or Newborough?
55:29
Ryan: I think.
55:30
Kearns: Yeah, he
55:30
Ryan: Yeah.
55:31
Kearns: in
55:31
Jon: I think, yeah.
55:32
Ryan: Wow.
55:34
Kearns: Dog barking.
55:35
Made him do it.
55:36
What's your next
55:37
Ryan: Well, number three,
55:38
Jon: Mm-hmm.
55:38
Ryan: it does relate to serial killers, and that's 1986, Henry
55:43
Portrait of a Serial Killer.
55:45
Now, these next three films I haven't seen.
55:48
Number one, I will explain why I'm never seen it.
55:50
Uh, number three though, um, for Henry, I, it's on my list.
55:54
I wanna watch it.
55:55
I've been following this movie since it's popped up for my love of Michael Rucker.
55:59
Uh, no chocolate pretzels though.
56:01
Jon: Mm-hmm.
56:02
Ryan: the controversy in it is, and I was reading about this, it's from,
56:06
uh, to quote, uh, movie web.com.
56:09
It's close to the real connections to the real life killer Henry Lee Lucas.
56:13
And that's where the, the controversy
56:15
Jon: Yeah.
56:16
Ryan: because there's no sympathy for Henry.
56:18
There's no sympathy for any of these characters.
56:20
And, um.
56:22
I spoiled the ending 'cause researching, kind of doing research
56:25
on it, trying to understand why someone would do a film like this.
56:29
The ending is just, it's a sad ending.
56:31
There's no good to it.
56:33
It's just you're going into the mind
56:35
Jon: Mm-hmm.
56:36
Ryan: sick person.
56:37
And Michael Ru is phenomenal.
56:39
John, you've seen
56:39
Jon: Yeah, yeah.
56:43
I, love the movie.
56:43
It's a hard watch and it's interesting that you put.
56:48
These two movies back to back in, in your top five.
56:51
Because I think part of what makes them difficult to watch and
56:55
controversial is how gritty they are.
56:58
Like they, they're, it's not polished, like Silence of the Lambs.
57:01
This is like, these are tougher watches.
57:05
Ryan: like real quick, Manhunter.
57:07
Manhunter is very gritty.
57:09
I feel Michael Mann, if they went
57:11
Jon: Mm-hmm.
57:12
Ryan: it wouldn't have gone as much notice.
57:15
Silence Lambs.
57:16
You got Anthony Hopkins.
57:17
You got big
57:18
Jon: Yeah.
57:19
Ryan: It's just like, compare.
57:21
But this movie, I wanna see if you know this movie, it's a, it's a German film.
57:27
It's banned all over, but it's called Necrotic.
57:32
Oh, you know what I'm talking about?
57:37
I saw that movie and I was like, I'm bringing this up.
57:40
It's 1987.
57:42
Kearns: this your number two?
57:43
Ryan: This is
57:43
Jon: Whoa.
57:44
Ryan: two.
57:44
And based on the title, you can get where this is going.
57:49
Kearns: Yeah.
57:49
Makes sense.
57:50
Ryan: yeah.
57:50
It's,
57:56
oh, John's got probably a 4K copy somewhere of this.
58:02
Kearns: He's going to get it right
58:03
Ryan: So basically this movie is banned all over the world.
58:06
It came out in Germany and people have gone it like through tapes and.
58:13
They made it, I guess, accessible with John having it probably from
58:17
in Europe, because I don't think it's ever touched the States
58:20
based on the context of the movie,
58:25
which I'll let you guys find on that one on your own.
58:28
I don't wanna explain that one.
58:30
Jon: Whoa.
58:32
Kearns: Waiting for his camera lighting to catch up to him
58:36
Ryan: Hold on, hold on.
58:38
I don't see it.
58:39
Oh.
58:39
Oh.
58:41
Kearns: There it is.
58:42
Neck romantic.
58:43
Ryan: is the same poster I'm looking at.
58:46
It's a beautiful poster.
58:48
The artist did a great job.
58:50
Now.
58:50
Jon: Mm-hmm.
58:51
Kearns: very pristine.
58:51
Jon: Now,
58:52
Ryan: Now let
58:53
Jon: I, I,
58:54
Ryan: how
58:54
Jon: want you to know the first It's bad.
58:59
It's bad, dude, if I, it's bad here, and here's how bad it is.
59:04
I also bought the second one, and if you notice the second one.
59:13
Mm-hmm.
59:14
Second one.
59:15
See that seam still wrapped.
59:19
Kearns: Oh,
59:19
Jon: That's how rough the first one was.
59:22
Ryan: ooh.
59:23
So
59:24
Kearns: Yeah.
59:24
It takes a lot to scare you off.
59:26
Jon: That's how rough the,
59:28
Ryan: comparing it to,
59:29
Jon: it,
59:29
Ryan: martyrs,
59:33
Jon: it, you can't, you martyrs.
59:37
Martyrs.
59:37
You can get to a place where it's like, this is a beautiful movie.
59:40
There's a powerful message here.
59:43
You cannot get there with ne romantic.
59:47
Ryan: I'm, I'm kind of happy
59:48
Jon: You just can't.
59:49
Ryan: like now, I mean,
59:51
Jon: There is nothing redemptive.
59:53
There's nothing.
59:54
It's just oh,
59:56
Ryan: I just never,
59:57
Kearns: romantic.
59:58
Ryan: heard of it till tonight when I was doing the research
1:00:00
and I was like, why is this band?
1:00:02
Jon: oh,
1:00:02
Ryan: 'cause I was thinking they've, they've done it before on an episode
1:00:06
of the X-Files, I think season four.
1:00:09
They
1:00:09
Jon: mm-hmm.
1:00:10
Ryan: but you never hear of it being filmed or like a plot point.
1:00:14
And I saw it and I was like, this is definitely controversy
1:00:17
because I'm presuming they go over the limit from what I've read.
1:00:22
They, I they go over the limit, but I'm presuming they,
1:00:26
Jon: It's pretty, it's pretty far past, uh, any reasonable boundaries
1:00:31
Kearns: What's your number one?
1:00:33
Jon: and most.
1:00:34
Ryan: well, this, I'm gonna ask you if this compare to this movie,
1:00:37
'cause this is my number one.
1:00:38
I, I can't watch this 'cause it's too realistic.
1:00:41
Two animals die.
1:00:43
get, I I get nauseous talking about it 'cause I've seen a couple of scenes.
1:00:47
Um, and that's 1980s Holocaust.
1:00:51
That's, have you, have you guys seen that movie?
1:00:54
'cause I, I can't, I've, I've seen the turtle.
1:00:57
think it's the donkey.
1:00:59
And I'm like, Nope, I can't.
1:01:01
Kearns: worse?
1:01:02
That are neck romantic.
1:01:04
Ryan: Good question.
1:01:05
S.
1:01:06
Jon: Ne romantic is worse.
1:01:08
Kearns: Okay.
1:01:08
So I'm never watching neck Romantic 'cause Cannibal Holocaust and I
1:01:11
Jon: ne
1:01:11
Kearns: enjoy
1:01:12
Jon: romantic.
1:01:13
Ryan: it's not an enjoyable movie.
1:01:14
Jon: Ne romantic is, I, I there are not many things that you would,
1:01:20
you could put on film that would bother me more than Nematic did.
1:01:24
Ryan: didn't like.
1:01:25
Kearns: how much you've seen, but, all right.
1:01:28
Jon: I mean, can Cannibal Holocaust isn't an easy watch, but like, can for me,
1:01:35
the thing with Cannibal Holocaust that makes it fun is the stories around it.
1:01:40
Like the, the director hiding the actors so that people thought it was real.
1:01:46
Like they kept the actors in seclusion for like two or three months before
1:01:50
the release, and then he was forced to produce them because people
1:01:54
thought that they were really dead.
1:01:56
Ryan: cool.
1:01:58
That's cool.
1:02:00
Jon: Yeah.
1:02:01
So, but yeah, I mean, I, it, it's not something I'll sit and rewatch,
1:02:06
Kearns: a
1:02:06
Jon: but
1:02:06
Kearns: top five for you tonight,
1:02:08
Ryan: So we're not gonna have ne romantic ever on the podcast.
1:02:12
All right, good.
1:02:13
No,
1:02:15
Kearns: We can read reviews on Patreon
1:02:17
Jon: No,
1:02:17
Kearns: for funsies, but
1:02:18
Ryan: Yes.
1:02:19
Kearns: John, you're up, buddy.
1:02:20
Jon: yeah.
1:02:22
All right.
1:02:23
I went with top five Killer Santas.
1:02:27
Ryan: Hold on.
1:02:27
I'm betting.
1:02:28
I'm betting tales from the cryptic on here.
1:02:32
No,
1:02:34
Kearns: Nice.
1:02:35
Jon: lose
1:02:35
Kearns: moving
1:02:36
Ryan: know.
1:02:36
Jon: number five.
1:02:37
Ryan: wait a minute.
1:02:37
Was it a head shake or a head Not.
1:02:41
Jon: It's a shake.
1:02:43
It is a shake.
1:02:47
Ryan: Damn.
1:02:48
Jon: No.
1:02:48
Okay, so my first movie, uh, Nu my number five has to start with the question.
1:02:55
Is it good?
1:02:56
Well, no, but it's fun and it's Santa's slay.
1:03:02
Ryan: Oh, come
1:03:03
Jon: Why is Santa Slay fun?
1:03:07
Santa Slay is fun because a demon loses a bet with an angel and has to
1:03:12
become Santa for a thousand years.
1:03:14
But as soon as the deal is up, he reverts to his evil ways and it's Bill
1:03:19
Goldberg as Santa, and they, he, he takes joy in being a killer Santa.
1:03:27
He's a wonderful killer.
1:03:28
Santa.
1:03:29
Ryan: Doesn't have that memorable scene at dinner.
1:03:31
Right?
1:03:32
The dining room table scene.
1:03:35
Yeah.
1:03:35
Jon: We with Fran Drescher.
1:03:37
Ryan: Yes,
1:03:38
Jon: I've seen a lot of Fran drescher lately, but I, um, my number four.
1:03:45
Yeah.
1:03:49
Seeing versus hearing though.
1:03:52
Kearns: Yeah, that's,
1:03:54
Ryan: I don't,
1:03:55
Kearns: yeah.
1:03:55
Ryan: gotta hear a
1:03:55
Jon: Yeah.
1:03:56
Ryan: Regular voice is totally different.
1:04:02
Jon: Number four is coming up very soon on our episode list.
1:04:07
It's Christmas, bloody Christmas.
1:04:11
Uh, so this is directed by Joe Vagos.
1:04:14
Yep.
1:04:16
All Tori wants for her Christmas Eve is to party with her friends,
1:04:21
but a malfunctioning robotic Santa comes to life and stalks Tory
1:04:27
and kills all of her friends.
1:04:29
Ryan: I think I brought that up on an earlier episode too,
1:04:32
that I am ready for that movie.
1:04:34
I wanna see that movie.
1:04:36
It's like the Futurama episode.
1:04:38
Jon: I enjoy it.
1:04:40
I enjoy it a lot.
1:04:43
Uh, which brings us to number three.
1:04:46
it's, a Netherland movie from the Netherlands.
1:04:49
It's called Sent,
1:04:50
Ryan: Yep.
1:04:50
Jon: in English, it's often called Saint.
1:04:53
so a teenager and a detective must work together to stop murderous Saint Nicholas,
1:04:59
who has returned, tore havoc with his army of evil minions called Black Peters.
1:05:07
Kearns: So do you guys know about Sin Klaus and Black?
1:05:10
Pete
1:05:12
Sin Klaus comes up, uh,
1:05:14
Jon: I do because of this movie.
1:05:16
Kearns: comes up on a Steamboat, and the Elf isn't an elf, it's a
1:05:19
Maorish slave, and that's who Black
1:05:22
Jon: Mm-hmm.
1:05:23
Kearns: So it's like, there's a,
1:05:25
Jon: Yep.
1:05:26
Kearns: different story here than the elves in the North
1:05:29
Pole, that kind of thing.
1:05:32
Ryan: Interesting.
1:05:34
Jon: yes.
1:05:36
so number two, we actually get Santa as a good guy.
1:05:41
Kearns: Hm.
1:05:42
Jon: But still a killer.
1:05:43
It's violent night.
1:05:45
Ryan: it's a good movie.
1:05:48
Jon: So you get David Harbor as Santa who gets trapped in a wealthy family's
1:05:52
home when a team of thieving mercenaries show up to empty the family vault.
1:05:58
What they didn't plan for was an ass kicking Santa Claus.
1:06:05
Kearns: Isn't
1:06:05
Jon: is
1:06:06
Kearns: with
1:06:06
Jon: If quickly.
1:06:09
Kearns: he's like san's like ex special
1:06:11
Ryan: That man,
1:06:14
Kearns: Yeah.
1:06:15
Ryan: on Netflix.
1:06:15
Jon: Yeah, and then there.
1:06:18
I feel like it's probably fairly similar to that one that came
1:06:21
out last year with The Rock.
1:06:24
Kearns: Oh
1:06:24
Ryan: Oh,
1:06:25
Jon: I can't remember what it's called.
1:06:28
Yeah,
1:06:29
Ryan: or something like that.
1:06:30
I
1:06:30
Jon: yeah.
1:06:31
Ryan: about it.
1:06:32
I was like, eh,
1:06:32
Jon: Something like that.
1:06:35
Yeah, I didn't either and I skipped it and I probably will continue
1:06:40
as much as I like all these like actiony horror Christmas movies.
1:06:45
I think I'm gonna pass.
1:06:46
But number one has already come up tonight.
1:06:51
and it's Christmas evil.
1:06:52
Ryan: All right.
1:06:54
Jon: so Harry was scarred by his discovery as a boy that Santa isn't real.
1:07:00
After seeing mom and Santa being intimate as an adult.
1:07:05
He works in a toy factory and is obsessed with Christmas and spreading
1:07:09
Christmas spirit right down to his own naughty list and a handcrafted suit.
1:07:15
Eventually he snaps and a killing spree follows.
1:07:20
one cool little bit of trivia.
1:07:22
Harry is played by Brandon Maggart, who is Fiona Apple's father.
1:07:27
Ryan: Oh, that's cool.
1:07:28
Kearns: neat.
1:07:29
Ryan: Okay.
1:07:30
Kearns: Fiona
1:07:30
Jon: Yeah.
1:07:31
Kearns: this weird grungy like broken girl hot thing going on.
1:07:34
Remember
1:07:37
that was, she was
1:07:38
Jon: Yep.
1:07:38
Kearns: she made you like wonder what you were attracted to when you were 13.
1:07:44
Jon: Mm-hmm.
1:07:45
Kearns: was, you were older, John, when Fiona Apple came on the scene, so you
1:07:48
already knew what you were attracted to.
1:07:49
Jon: Everybody.
1:07:52
Kearns: You were in that, uh, 50 year age bracket, like where your
1:07:56
boys are attracted to everything.
1:07:57
That's right.
1:07:58
That makes sense.
1:07:59
Jon: Mm-hmm.
1:08:00
Yep, yep,
1:08:01
Kearns: to 65.
1:08:02
Jon: yep.
1:08:03
Kearns: That's funny.
1:08:04
Jon: Yeah.
1:08:05
I hope it goes on beyond 65, actually.
1:08:08
Kearns: Um, if the rate of chlamydia in nursing homes is any indicator it
1:08:12
Ryan: Yes.
1:08:15
Jon: Awesome.
1:08:18
Ryan: Oh, sh
1:08:19
Jon: Awesome.
1:08:20
Can't wait.
1:08:20
Kearns: boy.
1:08:21
Ryan: Nikes.
1:08:23
Jon: my nursing home chlamydia.
1:08:27
Kearns: I mean, they got the medication right there.
1:08:29
It's like, why Use protection.
1:08:30
Right.
1:08:30
Ryan: Yeah.
1:08:31
Kearns: Take out your teeth,
1:08:32
Jon: I mean,
1:08:33
Kearns: a
1:08:33
Jon: I mean, listen, you, you have, you have two, you have two options.
1:08:39
Ryan: Travel
1:08:40
Jon: You have two options.
1:08:41
You can pursue chlamydia in the nursing home, or you can be Billy's grandfather.
1:08:46
Kearns: there it is.
1:08:47
Full
1:08:47
Ryan: Hmm.
1:08:48
Kearns: Um, uh, you know what though, being Billy's grandfather.
1:08:52
Might be more appealing to me at that wrinkly old age.
1:08:55
Ryan: funner.
1:08:56
Kearns: I mean, it looks like he's having a pretty good time while he is doing
1:08:59
Ryan: I get my apple sauce
1:09:01
Jon: Yep.
1:09:02
Kearns: and I
1:09:02
Ryan: freak.
1:09:03
Kearns: kids.
1:09:06
All right.
1:09:06
That's silent night.
1:09:07
Deadly night, everybody.
1:09:10
Ryan: Have a good day everyone.
1:09:13
Jon: Hey.
1:09:14
Kearns: Festivus.
1:09:15
Ryan: Happy fest.
1:09:18
Kearns: Yeah, it's happy Festivus.
1:09:19
That's true.