Latest / Do You F*cking Mind? / The Neuroscience of a Regulated Nervous System - and how to create one for yourself

Transcript

The Neuroscience of a Regulated Nervous System - and how to create one for yourself · Do You F*cking Mind?

• 0:14
  Speaker 1: Hello, beautiful Bens, and welcome to the podcast episode of Today.
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: So this episode is another neuroscience y episode, which we
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: love so much. This is all about the neuroscience of
• 0:26
  Speaker 1: emotional regulation or a regulated nervous system. I'm yet to
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: determine the title of the episode, but it's pretty much
• 0:32
  Speaker 1: the same thing when we talk about regulated emotions and
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: how to have a regulated nervous system. It's kind of
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: the same thing, really, and you're going to understand why
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: that is the case when I go in depth about
• 0:43
  Speaker 1: what is a regulated nervous system, what it isn't, what
• 0:46
  Speaker 1: are signs of a properly regulated nervous system, and what
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: are signs that it's not. I'm going to be talking
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: about the biomechanisms in the brain that goes on with
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: the ability to regulate a nervous system and when things
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: are going well versus when things are not going that well,
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: and then are going to be giving you actual tools
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: to put into practice. There's going to be things that
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: are going to work acutely in the short term to
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: feel more regulated, and then things that will also work
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: for the long term in a way that you're retraining
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: your brain to be able to do it on its
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: own in the future. Okay, So if you're someone that
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: feels like your nervous system is completely unregulated and you
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: really struggle to feel like you can either because we're
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: talking about the two extremes of emotional regulation. There's like
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: where you're going where you're flying way too high and
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: you're really stressed or anxious or you know, adrenaline and
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: cortisol and all of that and you can't bring it down.
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: Or there's the other version, which feels like not motivated
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: to do anything, kind of like a brain frog brain
• 1:48
  Speaker 1: brain fog, and you're kind of like a zombie going
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: through life like one of my bug I'm doing. So
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: they're the two extremes. So if you are someone that
• 1:55
  Speaker 1: is sitting in one of those two, there are things
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: that you can do. There's a lot that you can do,
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: and it's all good. So let's get into the episode
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: of today. Now, I'm going to do a little brain
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: fact to The brain fact is kind of very similar
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: to what we're going to be talking about today, and
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: it's what is a nervous breakdown. When people talk about
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: a mental breakdown or I had a nervous breakdown. We're
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: going to talk about what that is in a bit
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: of a nutshell. But I also did want to read
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: a few of the Spotify the comments that people left
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: on Spotify after I did the psychology behind the Slower
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Softer Life and why we're seeing more people return to this.
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: I had so many great fucking comments about that episode,
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: and I just wanted to share some of them with
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: you guys, because number one, love you guys, love my community,
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: but also it's a bit inspiring. I didn't realize how
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: many people would resonate so much with that episode. Not
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: only did I have so many comments, I also had
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: a lot of people dming me and emailing me as
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: well about this episode, and it really struck a chord.
• 2:55
  Speaker 1: If you haven't yet listened to that episode, please do.
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: It was last week, two episodes ago, three episodes ago,
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: and if I can say to myself, it was a
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: bit of a bang up. So let's go through some
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: of the comments. Someone said, I've gone through patches of
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: no social media quite a few times, and every single
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: time I found myself investing time into things I didn't
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: even know I wanted to do, such as new hobbies,
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: setting up a website for my small business, etc. I
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: really look forward to doing it again, as I know
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: it's only positive things that come from it. Then someone said,
• 3:29
  Speaker 1: I have a social media blocker. I have my apps
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: blocked from five am when I wake up to four
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: pm every day. Need to be better about weekends. That's
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: so good though, Like that's incredible. Then someone said it
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: will be two years in September since I deleted social media. However,
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: after listening to this, I've realized I'm now doom scrolling
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: groups in Peanuts. I've just deleted Peanut. Is that the
• 3:54
  Speaker 1: pregnancy app? Yes, I've just deleted it. Much rather be
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: listening to your Podcash Thank you, You're my favorite podcast.
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: I love this episode. I've been off social media for
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: the past month for all the reasons that you spoke about.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: You're so wise. Thank you. I feel like being called
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: wise is such a fucking flex So thank you very much.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: I moved countries this year. Social media is my dear
• 4:15
  Speaker 1: diary for me. This is exactly what I was talking
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: about how I want to use it. My connections are
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: very much my people. I post my life. I love
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: seeing what my friends are doing with their lives. I
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: never open advertisements or are real I only have Instagram, Facebook,
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: and Spotify only for you, not even music, and YouTube
• 4:31
  Speaker 1: only for music and sometimes school videos because I'm a teacher.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: I'm sad that social media ceased being social. We shouldn't
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: just ditch it. We must take control and force it
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: back to what we all claim to want. I agree,
• 4:43
  Speaker 1: I love it. I mean, for those of you that
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: have ditched it, fucking epic. But like I said in
• 4:47
  Speaker 1: my episode you know the other week, sometimes people do
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: crave that social connection online that they maybe can't get
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: in person. So it would be nice if we could
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: use social media in a way that felt really social
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: and like like cuddly and warm and yeah, not something
• 4:59
  Speaker 1: that affecting your mental health. I could go on forever.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: There's so many loved this episode in the OG format.
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: I deleted Instagram a couple of months ago. I feel
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: so much happier for it. I don't miss it at all,
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: so real and raw. I've been off social since twenty
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: twenty and I'm not going back. Epic. The way you
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: think and see the world and able to put it
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: out there more for people to be able to regulate
• 5:19
  Speaker 1: themselves truly is amazing. You should be so proud of
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: yourself and know that it always comes back. Thank you.
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: I just also wanted to say, I feel like I'm
• 5:25
  Speaker 1: always nodding my head when a moone walks listening to
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: your podcast. Your little twinies are going to be such
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: great human beings having a mom like you. That's so beautiful. Anyway,
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: they're just awesome, awesome, awesome comments that people have written.
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: I love if you guys are interested in hearing what
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: other people have been doing to regulate their social media use.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: Go and look at the comments on that episode from
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: last week on Spotify. But yeah, very cool. Now. One
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: of the comments that someone wrote was, please tell me
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: that you're starting a substack, and that was my next announcement.
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: I'm starting a substack. I'm so excited. By the time
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: you guys are listening to this episode, my substack will
• 6:03
  Speaker 1: be coming out tomorrow because you're listening to this on Tuesday,
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: and so this is the thing. Whether I like it
• 6:10
  Speaker 1: or not, it now has to come out on Wednesday
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: because I've told you guys, and I need to commit
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: to this. But I am starting a substack. It is
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: something that I've been going back and forth in my head.
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: I mentioned at the start of the year, I want
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: to be doing a blog. I want to be writing.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: I want to be doing way more creative writing where
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: I'm able. The difference between writing and podcasting is when
• 6:30
  Speaker 1: I write, I can take my time and I don't
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: miss out on things that I want to say. Mind you,
• 6:35
  Speaker 1: I do say a lot of what I want to
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: say on this podcast, so don't get me wrong. But
• 6:38
  Speaker 1: writing is just very different medium altogether, and I really
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: enjoy it. And I decided, after back and forth, to
• 6:44
  Speaker 1: it to a blog, a substack blog. I'm doing a
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: substack and I am so obsessed with substack as well.
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: It is my new scrolling and I don't watch any
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: videos on it. I just read and it feels so
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: good for the soul because it's just exactly the kind
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: of content that I really want to be reading and absorbing.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: It's very very good for the soul and food for thought.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: I really enjoy it. That's all. That's all my life
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: updates before we get into the episode of today. Other
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: than I just bought yet another book. I buy so
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: many books. My favorite thing in life is buying books.
• 7:13
  Speaker 1: I bought a book called The what's it called? Anyway?
• 7:16
  Speaker 1: It'll come to me? Where the fuck is that pink book.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: It's probably in the kitchen whatever. I bought a book
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: and it just made me realize that one of my
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: favorite things about books is the physical act of going
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: into a bookstore and buying a book. You never want
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: to be doing anything other than perusing through books at
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: a bookstore, which takes me to my future dream in life,
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: which I'm going to share with you guys, and that
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: is to own a bookstore, specifically in the Southern Highlands
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: with my cousin Josell. And we want to have a
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: little cafe attached that sells cinnamon donuts, just cinnamon donuts,
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: much are coffee and different teas. And I want to
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: have a puzzle room where everyone can just puzzle and
• 7:49
  Speaker 1: practice for their puzzle comps, because I'll be practicing for
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: my puzzle comp there. And I want to have like
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: a supper club every single Tuesday nights where we just
• 7:56
  Speaker 1: talk about books. So if you guys are interested in
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: my future life life aspirations, then please join my future
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: bookshop membership. I don't know where that's going to happen,
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: but that's my dream. Okay, I need to stop rambling.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: Let's get into the episode of today. So the brain
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: fact we're talking about is nervous breakdown. What exactly is
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: a nervous breakdown? So well, nervous breakdown is very much
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: a thing. The term nervous breakdown isn't a medical term
• 8:23
  Speaker 1: in the DSM five, but it's molso an umbrella term
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: still used by professionals, but it's not in and of itself,
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: it's not a diagnosis, but it's an umbrella term to
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: describe many different things that can fall under that. And
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: it's when stress or mental health issues become so intense
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: and so overwhelming, also known as a crisis, like a
• 8:43
  Speaker 1: mental crisis, that it becomes unmanageable, and by unmanageable, that
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: can look different for the individual, and the causes of
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: it are also different. That's why we kind of have
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: this umbrella term because there's many, many, many different things
• 8:57
  Speaker 1: that could kind of fall under this nervous breakdown or
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: a mental breakdown. But the symptoms vary, and they include
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: anxiety or depressive symptoms that you cannot manage. And but
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: I cannot manage. We're saying that you can't operate your
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: normal life, so you withdraw from your usual daily activities.
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: This is things like. It could be basic things you know,
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: where maybe like it feels like the house has become
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: an absolute bomb because you're not able to keep up
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: with house things. Your social withdrawal. You pull out of
• 9:33
  Speaker 1: not just social engagements, but also appointments that you probably
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: should be going to or a course that you're doing,
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: and you just stop going. Things just become really unmanageable.
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: You stop doing the things that make your life your life.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: You also you begin to isolate yourself. You're irritable. Insomnia.
• 9:51
  Speaker 1: Now it's not all of these things. You might have
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: some of them, or all of them, or just you know,
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: a couple insomnia, racing heart and chest pains. Your appetite
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: will change, maybe you're eating way more or you're eating
• 10:03
  Speaker 1: way less. And then another common one is feeling paranoid
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: or hallucinations in the sense that you are seeing or
• 10:12
  Speaker 1: hearing things and then realizing that that wasn't actually what
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: you saw or heard later on, or people are telling
• 10:17
  Speaker 1: you that's not actually what's happening. So some can be
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: like really really extreme, and some can seem a bit
• 10:24
  Speaker 1: more like milder. But it is caused by a whole
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: different array of things. So it could be a single
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: event that causes extreme distress. So that could be a
• 10:36
  Speaker 1: medical diagnosis that you've received or someone very close to
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: you has received and it's causing you extreme distress. Could
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: be a divorce, it could be the loss of a
• 10:45
  Speaker 1: job loss. In general, post traumatic stress disorder can also
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: lead to having a nervous breakdown, major depressive disorder as
• 10:56
  Speaker 1: well a family history of mental health and also a
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: combination of that plus lack of social support. So this
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: lack of your community, lack of having you know, those
• 11:06
  Speaker 1: close people to lean on. So social support very often
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: comes always comes back when we're talking about mental health.
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: Social support is one of the key key pillars in
• 11:16
  Speaker 1: really helping someone climb out of something really difficult like that.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: So when you are lacking in social support, it obviously
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: can make someone slip further into you know, this nervous
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: breakdown or a mental breakdown. Now, treatment options include medications
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: such as SSRIs so selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors, and this
• 11:38
  Speaker 1: is to increase serotonin. When your serotonin levels are increased
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: or available serotonin levels are increased, then that that is
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: a very effective way of treating it. Not for everyone though,
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: so it doesn't work for everyone. Then we've got s NRIs,
• 11:53
  Speaker 1: so this is selective. It's serotonin and nora adrenaline reuptake inhibitors.
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: Then we've got benzodies and hands, which is for short
• 12:01
  Speaker 1: periods only. Then there's psychological therapies, cognitive behavioral therapy, psychotherapy, mindfulness,
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: relaxation training to manage symptoms, and then things like change
• 12:12
  Speaker 1: in your lifestyle, like what kind of are you You know,
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: you're drinking a lot of alcohol. What is your diet like,
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: do you have a nice balance diaret, Do you have
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: enough oils and fats and proteins and all of that
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: are you Are you nourishing your body sufficiently, because how
• 12:27
  Speaker 1: we nourish our body is very much how we nourish
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: the brain as well, and that can be something that
• 12:31
  Speaker 1: can really help with your moods as well. There's actually
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: this whole thing on like vitamin B and depression on
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: the brain. So having a handful of you know, vitamin
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: B rich nuts such as cashews can be very very
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: good for the brain and for mood disorders as well,
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: but not standalone, obviously, in a combination of treatments as well,
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: so it is highly treatable and most people recover completely
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: from a nervous breakdown and a mental breakdown after doing
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: treatment and developing new coping skills. So that is the
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: brain fact of today. Now let's talk about the episode
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: topic of the day, and this is how to create
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: a regulated nervous system or how to regulate your emotions.
• 13:17
  Speaker 1: So a regulated nervous system is not a nervous system
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: that is always calm. It's not those people that are
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: always super chilled and super calm, while they may also
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: have a regulated nervous system, but you don't have to
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: achieve that status. You know, there's people that you know
• 13:30
  Speaker 1: that never blow up, never get angry, and you think, God,
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: it would be nice to live in your head, and
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: it probably would be very nice to live in that
• 13:37
  Speaker 1: person's head. But you don't even need to get to
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: that point to have a regulated nervous system. You can
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: still be someone that blows up, that gets fucking annoyed,
• 13:44
  Speaker 1: that gets irritable, that has all the emotions and snaps,
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: but still has a regulated nervous system, because it comes
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: down to how does your nervous system respond appropriately to
• 13:56
  Speaker 1: what is happening and how quickly can you pivot when
• 14:00
  Speaker 1: it responds inappropriately because we're on the human and you
• 14:05
  Speaker 1: might snap and think pretty quickly, oh, wow, that was
• 14:09
  Speaker 1: a bit of a reaction. I'm just going to correct
• 14:11
  Speaker 1: myself there, sorry about that. That's a regulated nervous system.
• 14:14
  Speaker 1: The ability to do that and pull it back, that
• 14:16
  Speaker 1: shows that your nervous system is regulated. So even if
• 14:20
  Speaker 1: you're someone that does go a little bit overboard, but
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: then you can see it, correct it and bring it back,
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: that's a regulated nervous system, and that's when you know
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: that things are kind of working nice and healthily, and
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: it's something that can be trained. So if you're someone
• 14:32
  Speaker 1: that's like no, no, no, no no. If I have
• 14:34
  Speaker 1: a bad conversation, it ruins my day. I feel this
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: weight on my chest, this like anxious, anxious feeling. I
• 14:40
  Speaker 1: can't spiraling, and then I can't talk myself down off
• 14:43
  Speaker 1: the ledge. You can train, you can train yourself to
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: kind of break out of that and be able to
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: regulate it. And after a bad conversation, you kind of
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: can shake it off and think, wow, okay, and then
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: before you know what, you're pivoting and you're enjoying the
• 14:58
  Speaker 1: rest of your day. You're enjoying the other things the day,
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: another social interaction or a movie that you wanted to
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: sit down and watch, or a meal that you're having,
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: a work that you're doing, and you've kind of taken
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: that bad conversation that you had out of your mind
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: after appropriately dealing with it in your head. So that's
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: what we're talking about when we refer to regulated nervous
• 15:14
  Speaker 1: system or regulated emotions. For the sake of this episode,
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: I'm probably just going to stick to regulated nervous system,
• 15:19
  Speaker 1: but you know, I'm talking about emotions as well. So basically,
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: how often and how easily can your mind intercept to
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: make a difference in your physiological state? When I'm going
• 15:30
  Speaker 1: to be giving you these these you know, like different
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: tools and tips to use a lot of them seem
• 15:37
  Speaker 1: like you have to intercept consciously. I have to make
• 15:40
  Speaker 1: a conscious decision to intercept and then but the more
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: you do it, it will it will eventually become subconscious
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: because for a lot of people who already automatically have
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: a regulated nervous system, this interception is happening subconsciously, even
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: if they're noticing it happen. It's not an effort to
• 15:57
  Speaker 1: do it. It just kind of your brain intercepts or
• 15:59
  Speaker 1: intercept intercept. I've noticed something, I've been made aware. My
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: mind has made me aware of this thing, and now
• 16:05
  Speaker 1: I'm going to start to calm down or want to
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: have this big emotion. It's just automatic for me to
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: like feel that emotion and then and then I just
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: let it go. So eventually, after doing something consciously enough times,
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: it becomes subconscious. You are training your brain like a muscle.
• 16:21
  Speaker 1: So it can be done, and it might not happen overnight,
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: but it absolutely can be done to the extent where
• 16:28
  Speaker 1: you'll be very pleasantly surprised one day where it would
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: just happen automatically for you and to be very exciting.
• 16:34
  Speaker 1: Now let's talk about the biological mechanisms involved. So first
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: the causes of an unregulated nervous system. We've got chronic stress,
• 16:42
  Speaker 1: so this is ongoing pressure or cumulative load. This is
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: all these little things stacking on, stacking on, stacking on,
• 16:49
  Speaker 1: stacking on, stacking on, and then it's really hard for
• 16:51
  Speaker 1: you to become or regulated or whatever. You're irritable and
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: you're snapping, and also turn off your notifications because that
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: contributes lifestyle. So stimulants or substance abuse poor diet, poor
• 17:03
  Speaker 1: sleep that will contribute trauma, other health conditions such as
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: chronic pain and autoimmune disease. So these are all things
• 17:09
  Speaker 1: that will contribute. Now we're talking about the two nervous well,
• 17:14
  Speaker 1: the autonomic nervous system. We're talking about the sympathetic nervous
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: system and the parasympathetic nervous system. That is what we
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: are referring to when we talk about regulated nervous system,
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: the regulation between those two and easily being able to
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: switch between. So sympathetic nervous system is what releases adrenaline, cortisol.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: It gets your heart rate up, in increases your blood pressure.
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: It's triggered by perceived stress anything that and it's not
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: always negative stress either, but it's when I need to perform.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: It's either I need to protect myself flight, fight, freeze,
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: flee all of that, or I need to perform. I
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: need to act. So this will also happen if you're
• 17:51
  Speaker 1: about to run a race, or you're about to get
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: on stage, you're about to make a presentation, you're about
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: to do a test. These are all really good things.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: If I'm about to do a test, I want a
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: bit of this going on because it's going to make
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: my focus sharp, it's going to make me switch on.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: It's going to cut out things that are going to
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: distract me. I'm not going to be thinking about food.
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: I'm not gonna be thinking it's just I'm in the
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: fucking zone. So this is a good thing to have
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: in moderation. So it's triggered by perceived stress. The amygdala
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: is signaling the hippocampus. We're getting diverted, like blood is
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: being diverted to major muscle groups for action. This is
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: why we're increasing that blood pressure, and it's going away
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: from like the digestion and all of that, so we
• 18:30
  Speaker 1: kind of stop digesting and it goes all to the
• 18:32
  Speaker 1: muscles and peopils dilate all that shit. So that's sympathetic
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: nervous system, very good in small doses, very useful. We
• 18:38
  Speaker 1: all need it. This is also, though, what contributes to
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: you know, chronic anxiety. If it's constantly, constantly on on
• 18:46
  Speaker 1: on on on and we can't downregulate, then you've got
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: the parasympathetic nervous system. And this is mediated by a
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: couple of things, vegas nerve being one of them, and
• 18:56
  Speaker 1: it is kind of putting on the brakes. It's the
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: biological breaks. A seat of colon is released and this
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: slows down the heart rate, it lowers your blood pressure,
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: stimulates digestion, and this is where you're also conserving energy.
• 19:07
  Speaker 1: This is a lot calm, it's a lot more relaxed.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: If you think about body language, it's when you you know,
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: can drop your shoulders. When you just fully relax, we
• 19:14
  Speaker 1: can can take a nice deep breath. You know when
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: I talk about the intentional sib big breath, oh, big
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: breath out, I feel calm. I'm telling my mind that
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: I'll come. That's all parath sympathetic never system. These two symptoms,
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: these two systems work together to maintain balance and respond
• 19:32
  Speaker 1: to the situation that you're experiencing. Accordingly, both are very
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: very important, and like I said, if you have too
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: much of one, you're always on high alert. It's going
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: to be anxious. And if you have too much of
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: the other, you're gonna have like no drive, brain fog,
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: low performance. You're going to struggle to see something through
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: or stick it out. Then we've got the hyperthalamic pituitary
• 19:52
  Speaker 1: adrenal axis, the HPA axis, and this is governing the
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: body's stress response. So its function is to release cortisol
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: when necessary to allow your body to respond to stress,
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: and this is automatic. In a regulated nervous system, your
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: body creates something of a negative feedback loop. And what
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: happens is when you get high levels of cortisome to
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: cortisol to respond to stress, it then signals different areas
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: of the brain, well, I've got high cortisol. It's signaling
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: the prefrontal cortex, the hippocampus, different areas of the brain.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: And then the different areas of the brain realize that
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: these cortisol levels are up, and then what it does
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: It decides to halt the production of further cortisol, preventing
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: this chronic activation of more, more, more, more more. So
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: it says, yep, got enough, I got what I needed,
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: and now I'm going to stop. Don't need any more cordisol
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: for the for the time being, that cordsole gets used
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: up and then you go back to this nice calm state.
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: So that's this negative feedback loop. It's telling you stop.
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: It's telling you I've got enough of it. Now I
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: need to shut it down. In an unregulated nervous system,
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: this HPA access gets stuck in this loop of overdrive
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: or kind of like this shutdown. So this signaling of
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: I need to stop producing isn't happening. So it's continuously
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: pumping out, pumping out, pumping out these stress hormones. And
• 21:18
  Speaker 1: then that results in your inability to properly respond to
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: a stressful situation because when it's always chronic thing, you
• 21:26
  Speaker 1: don't get to experience like a proper spike and a
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: proper drop, but it's just always chronic. And that's where
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: like anxiety, chronic anxiety, chronic stress, you get physical and
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: mental exhaustion, and then it can result also in like
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: inflammation literally as well. And then the parts that make
• 21:43
  Speaker 1: up the HPA access some won't go into detail, but
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: this is your hypothalamus, your petuitary glands, and your adrenal glands.
• 21:51
  Speaker 1: Now let's talk about the key markers if a regulated
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: versus non regulated state. So what does it look like
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: when it's not regulated, and what are kind of the
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: not so desirable outcomes? So this is where someone is aggressive, violent,
• 22:05
  Speaker 1: and mind you not all of the things. You could
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: be someone that's not regulated at all and you're not
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: an aggressive, violent pasant, but it can be these things aggression, violence,
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: antisocial behavior, whether it's being inappropriate or whether it's actually
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: just being withdrawn as well and not really being able
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: to interact properly isolation exclusion. Disorders involving an inability to
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: regulate one's emotions are things like antisocial personality disorder, post
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: traumatic stress disorder, and also major depressive disorder, just to
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: name a few. So people that have these conditions may
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: also struggle significantly to regulate their nervous system, and then
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: it becomes it's like a feeling of emotional dysregulation. So
• 22:52
  Speaker 1: your reactions are way bigger than what the situation warrants,
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: So it's really hard to think properly in the moment.
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: It's really hard to reason in that moment, and then
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: we get all these other emotions that arise as a
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: reaction to feeling these feelings like anger, and then that
• 23:06
  Speaker 1: hurts your relationships and your mood and your well being
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: and just your overall day. The key marks are a
• 23:12
  Speaker 1: regulated nervous system, someone that can experience all the emotions
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: but be able to very quickly either verbally intercept and say,
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: oh no, actually I went too far, didn't may they're
• 23:27
  Speaker 1: or just internally you think all right, well, it's actually okay,
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: it's not that big of a deal. It's actually you
• 23:34
  Speaker 1: know maybe Or let's say you're messaging someone and it's
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: an example I use all the time, and you're stressed
• 23:40
  Speaker 1: and you're going back and forth and then they stop
• 23:42
  Speaker 1: messaging you. If you've got this unregulated nervous system, you
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: start thinking, well, you know, now they're really angry, and
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: now this and now that, and you start to spiral, spiral,
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: tal you can't concentrate on anything else. You try and
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: sit down to do work, you can't. You're angry, you're
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: pissed off, you're you're agitated. If it's regulated, you think
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: they probably started doing something now they can't reply, and
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: then you think, maybe I'll just switch my mind to
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: something else, because there's no point going over and over
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: in this on this thing until I get a response anyway.
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: And then you think, oh, well, like bigger picture, it's
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: probably fine. I was just a little bit fired up,
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: but really, when I just took myself down on the ledge,
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: it's actually okay. And then before you know it, you're like, oh,
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: fuck it, it's fine, Like I'm not actually that angry. We
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: can just discuss it in person when I say them.
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: So that series of events, but for a lot of
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: people is just automatic kind of starts happening, happening. And
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: the more you talk yourself down off the ledge, the
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: easier it is to feel more regulated, more regulated, and
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: more regulated, more regulated. Now there's something called top down regulation,
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: and there's these studies that have been done where they
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: do newer imaging studies of participants while they're trying to
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: regulate their emotions. So for example, they're trying to suppress
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: a really negative emotion like anger or like an outburst,
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: or they're trying to engage in something called cognitive reappraisal
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: of this negative event. So let's say they're given like
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: a visual of a negative event and they have to
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: engage in like seeing that thing having an emotion triggered,
• 25:06
  Speaker 1: and then how are they dealing with it in their
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: mind versus like are they going to, you know, look
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: at this negative thing and then talk themselves out of
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: it being that negative and saying, well, you know, it's
• 25:15
  Speaker 1: actually not that bad. It could actually be something a
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: little bit more benign. It's you know, So they're doing
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: this cognitive reappraisal or they're suppressing their negative emotions through
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: other strategies as well, and they show that there's a
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: consistent pattern where you see regions of the prefrontal cortex
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: being lit up, such as the ventral medial prefrontal cortex
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: or the lateral prefrontal cortex. You see this increased activity
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: when participants can actively regulate their emotions, and when we
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: see that, then we see a reduction in activity in
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: the amygdala, so we're getting a suppression of these negative
• 25:53
  Speaker 1: emotions or these high stress emotions. So we're seeing these
• 25:56
  Speaker 1: two regions inversely correlated. When we see more activity in
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: the prefrontal cortex specifically ventromedial prefrontal cortex and the lateral
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: prefrontal cortex, we're seeing less activity in the amigdala and
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: vice versa. So it just basically shows that this circuit
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: of emotional regulation is crucial prefrontal cortex amigdala. I've spoken
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: about that so many times in my podcast, that link
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: between these two specific brain regions, and interestingly, people with
• 26:27
  Speaker 1: major depressive disorder, when they were asked to do the
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: same thing in these neuroimaging studies, it was a lot
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: harder for them to get that activation of the ventra
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: medial prefrontal cortex, and then we weren't seeing this like
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: inversely correlated correlation between the prefrontal cortex and the amigdala.
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: So for these individuals, it was a lot harder for them,
• 26:47
  Speaker 1: if at all possible, in the height of their stress
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: or anger, to actually turn that down. Now we also
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: saw the same with patients with borderline personality disorder have
• 27:00
  Speaker 1: this like exaggerated activation of the amygdala in response to
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: this emotional stimulus as well. So now that we understand
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: what's going on in the brain, I want to talk
• 27:10
  Speaker 1: about what it is that you can be doing, strategies
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: and tools that you can be using to actually make
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: a difference. We all use strategies as it is already,
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: whether we have a regulated nervous system or whether we
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: have an unregulated nervous system. I would say every single
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: one of us uses a strategy to help regulate our emotions.
• 27:32
  Speaker 1: And there are useful, helpful strategies, and then are unhelpful
• 27:37
  Speaker 1: or unhealthy strategies. So when you wind down every day
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: with the glass of wine, but then it becomes a need,
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: that's an unhelpful strategy, but it's a strategy it's a
• 27:47
  Speaker 1: tool that you use we all know how to. And
• 27:49
  Speaker 1: then like to the extreme, extreme, extreme end of that scale,
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: there's self harm that is a tool to try and regulate.
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: You're trying to shift the focus of a really horrible
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: feeling into a different horrible feeling. But self harm still
• 28:03
  Speaker 1: lies on that kind of scale that we're talking about
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: of tools that we used to regulate our emotions. Drug use,
• 28:11
  Speaker 1: all things that are going to be like a quick fix,
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: but a major distraction kind of quick fix like alcohol,
• 28:18
  Speaker 1: drug use, self harm when we get to the extreme
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: end of that scale, is still a tool, right. It's
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: a strategy that it's a harmful but it is a
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: strategy that you're using. So if you look at it
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: that way, saying, well, you know, maybe that me using
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: alcohol to wind down once in a while is fine,
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: but if I'm doing it every time I'm stressed, I
• 28:41
  Speaker 1: need to look at that because then I'm taking away
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: the ability for myself to create my own de stressing
• 28:47
  Speaker 1: mechanisms in my own brain. I've got to allow my
• 28:50
  Speaker 1: brain to create it. And it's fine. Like I do
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: with my girlfriends all the time. It's like I've had
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: a fucking dababe, let's get a fucking wine. Like who
• 28:56
  Speaker 1: doesn't like that? But you just don't want it to
• 28:59
  Speaker 1: get to the point where where it's I'm relying on
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: that wine or I need to hit the fucking hard
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: drugs if I. But like, that's obviously an issue. So
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: we need to look at strategies that are going to
• 29:11
  Speaker 1: be super super effective that you can rely on long
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: term that will retrain your brain. Because when we look
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: at having a drink or doing these behavioral things that
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: are just major distractors, doom scrolling, whatever as a way
• 29:22
  Speaker 1: to try and regulate your emotions, it's not retraining the
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: brain either, So it's a not really helpful but be
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: it's not doing anything in the long term for this
• 29:29
  Speaker 1: cognitive reappraisal or cognitive retraining. So let's talk about things
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: that we can do. We've got physical techniques and then
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: we've got cognitive techniques as well, So cognitive let's talk
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: about cognitive first. Cognitive reappraisal is a great one and
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: it's one that works in the short term and it
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: also works in the long term. This is where you're
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: literally talking yourself down and giving yourself alternative reasons for
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: why something could have happened, or you're trying to say, oh,
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: it's actually not that bad. It's when you perceive a
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: stimulus and say, how can I make this a bit
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: more neutral, how can I make this less intense with like,
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: like I gave the example of the person that didn't reply,
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: If someone's staring at you in public, you could think,
• 30:07
  Speaker 1: oh my god, they're judging me, Oh my god, do
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: I know them? Oh my god? Or you could think
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: that person is probably disassociating. You know, when you're like
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: so focused on something that your eyes are kind of
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: zoned out and you realize you've just been looking at
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: a person or a thing or an object, and you're like, wow,
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: how long have I been staring into space? And that
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: person probably thinks I'm looking at them. So that's a
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: great cognitive prais Its like maybe that person's just absolutely,
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: you know, zoning out or dissociating. You know. Another one
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: could be you hear someone someone's looking at you and
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: then they're laughing, Oh my god, are they're laughing at me? Me?
• 30:40
  Speaker 1: But then you think, well, firstly, I don't know this person.
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: There's a million things this could person could be laughing at.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: Even if they were laughing at me. I'm probably never
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: going to see them against It's actually not the end
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: of the world. And so you start coming up with
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: all these different things, and that's cognitive reappraisal. You're training
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: your brain to very very quickly come up with alternative
• 30:56
  Speaker 1: reasons for a potentially negative stimulus, to turn it into
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: more of a neutral stimulus, so it affects you less
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: and less and less, even if you don't know the
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: answer for it. Because we're great at mind reading, most
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: of the time, will come up with the worst case scenario,
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: which isn't even true. So why not come with a
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: better case scenario even if we don't know it's true.
• 31:12
  Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. We don't know the answer anyway. Then
• 31:16
  Speaker 1: we've got attentional like shifting, where we're able to shift
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: our attention onto something. So, for example, let's say you
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: start thinking about something that's quite stressful or sad, you've
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: been dumped, and you start to spiral and you're thinking
• 31:28
  Speaker 1: about all these things. A really good thing is to
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: have like that positive folder that I've spoken about. I
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: haven't spoken about this in ages, but I talk about
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: this like positive folder that maybe like in my notes
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: in my phone. I have a list of hilarious stories
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: that's even happened to me or to my best friends,
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: or stories that my friends have told me about, just
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: really funny anecdotes. So I can scroll through that and
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: maybe the first of you won't make me laugh, but
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: then there'll be something that really will make me laugh.
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: Another one is a really positive playlist, music that will
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: always make you feel good, not the ones that make
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: you think deeply In all they can live in other playlists,
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: but for when you're actually trying to shift your attention,
• 32:02
  Speaker 1: these are really really helpful. They're like mood shifters, and
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: they're really good for once you've done enough spiraling. You've
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: tried to feel the emotions, but you're starting to feel
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: it too much. And in the sense where you're going
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: into a loop. It's not the healthy I'm going to
• 32:14
  Speaker 1: feel it so I can move out of it. It's
• 32:16
  Speaker 1: that I'm now starting to spiral, and I'm now starting to,
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: you know, read old messages and listen to some and
• 32:21
  Speaker 1: I'm feeling worse and worse and worse. A great playlist
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: with music that only ever makes you feel good. Maybe
• 32:27
  Speaker 1: a photo album of really great images, Maybe a thing
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: of notes. I personally have a folder in my phone
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: of great messages that listeners have sent me, little things
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: like that. You can create your own folder, and these
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: are really good shifters to not only make yourself feel better,
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: like music is a great tool to lift your mood,
• 32:46
  Speaker 1: but also it puts things into perspective. Sometimes, if you're
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: feeling really low, a little folder of notes that your
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: friends and family have written you, maybe on birthdays or whatever,
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: or messages that people have sent you that you think, oh,
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: just it helps me put things back into perspective. If
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: I'm actually a really valuable person in other people's lives
• 33:02
  Speaker 1: and I really do contribute so much, and you know,
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: it evens it out, like I feel. I might not
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: feel elated right now, but I definitely feel more balanced.
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: And that is a really good way of like shifting
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: your attention to retrain yourself how to find like that equilibrium.
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: And then, of course, when it's not too spirally and
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: intense your emotions. Is this acceptance, This allowing feelings to
• 33:25
  Speaker 1: pass naturally in the sense of if I do need
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: to cry, I will allow myself to cry. It's not
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: about avoiding my feelings. It's about once my feelings are here?
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: What can I do about it? So these are really
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: great things that you can use. But then I want
• 33:38
  Speaker 1: to talk about physical techniques that are extremely effective for
• 33:41
  Speaker 1: you to use. So the extended exhales or the intentional
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: sigh as I often refer to it as. So this
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: is many different breath work styles will cover this. But
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: you could just do a really big deep breath in
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: hold for three seconds and a long seven eight to
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: ten like second exhale like long. It's strong, loud exhal
• 33:59
  Speaker 1: Do that a couple of times. Don't hyperventilate, but do
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: it a couple of times, and you're going to feel
• 34:04
  Speaker 1: a difference in your physical state. Then we've got digital
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: blackout time. If you start to feel really overwhelmed, put
• 34:09
  Speaker 1: your phone away, put it to the side. Can you,
• 34:12
  Speaker 1: like maybe just do a few stretches or walk away
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: from it, or go and make yourself a little I
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: don't know, start cooking dinner or doing something that's like
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: not constantly being bombarded, bombarded and bombarded with your attention
• 34:23
  Speaker 1: being pulled, pulled, pulled. That's going to stop this constant
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: stimulation and allow you to slowly start like returning to
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: a calm state. Weighted blankets are really helpful for a
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: lot of people. Some people are like, fuck that, that
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: gives me more anxiety. Some people love it. Some people
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: it's like it actually mimics like being held or a hug,
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: and it's really comforting for some people. So weighted blankets
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: is a good thing. If you want to meditate under
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: a weighted blanket, it can actually really calm you down
• 34:49
  Speaker 1: in a very short amount of time. Cold water exposure
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: is a great one to really kind of shock you
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: into a calmer state. I personally love that and I
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: notice a huge difference it like it makes my mind
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: go a blank in a good way. Humming here's a
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: fucking good one for you. Humming, singing, but especially humming
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: can stimulate your vegus nerve specifically, and this kind of
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: the branches of the vegus nerves pass through the vocal cords,
• 35:19
  Speaker 1: so the vibrations of the vocal cords are stimulating the
• 35:21
  Speaker 1: vegus nerve. And this is one of the things in
• 35:23
  Speaker 1: the HPA access that I was talking about that helps
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: switch on your parasympathetic nervous system. That's where you stay
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: in karma. So when we start to hum, it starts
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: to lower your heart rate. It starts to promote relaxation.
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: So hum away, hum all day long if you want,
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: and it's going to start to make you feel a
• 35:41
  Speaker 1: little bit calmer. Another one is walking barefoot on grass outdoors. Now,
• 35:46
  Speaker 1: anything outdoors is going to be really great. And if
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: you can do it without listening to anything other than me,
• 35:51
  Speaker 1: of course, but no, in all seriousness, not even me.
• 35:54
  Speaker 1: Just just just be in nature, this forest, bathing, where
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: you lie and look up at the trees, you're walking
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: on grass or in the sand. If you have a
• 36:01
  Speaker 1: beach nearby, I love that so much for you to
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: go jump in the ocean. That kind of stuff very
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: very good for the nervous system. Sunlight in the morning.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: Of course, all of that stuff your diet again, like,
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: are you sure that you're getting a nice array of
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: all the things you know, like fats, proteins, carbohydrates, everything,
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: Just a nice balanced diet, nothing too complicated. Go and
• 36:22
  Speaker 1: have your beautiful cinnamon doughnut at my future bookshop by
• 36:24
  Speaker 1: the way. But yeah, are we having enough? Are we
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: having enough vitamins? All the shit that we should be
• 36:29
  Speaker 1: getting in our diet. That's going to make a difference,
• 36:31
  Speaker 1: of course, social support, adopting a calm hobby that you
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: can switch to at any time. For me, sewing was
• 36:37
  Speaker 1: my saving grace when my anxiety was at my peak.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: I would get home peaking with anxiety like I'd be
• 36:42
  Speaker 1: like Noah, and then I'd sit down and sew and
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: I forget that my phone was in my bag, and
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: maybe four hours later and I'd be so calm, so
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: in the zone. It was like a meditation. Unbelievable. And yeah,
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: but like, these hobbies are going to absolutely change change
• 36:56
  Speaker 1: your life. So any calming hobby, do a fucking cross stitch. Right,
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: next time someone's angry at you, tell them sit the
• 37:03
  Speaker 1: fuck down and do a fucking cross stitch under a
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: weighted banket. Okay, mate, You're going to do them a favor,
• 37:08
  Speaker 1: and you do yourself a favor. So any of the
• 37:11
  Speaker 1: above is going to make a huge difference. And the
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: beauty of it is when you engage in these tasks
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: that's consciously driven, you will start to train your subconscious
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: to take over that task. The brain just does what
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: you tell it to do enough times, so I'm always
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: telling my brain that I'm a fucking idiot and that
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: I can't ever get anything, right, my subconscious is going
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: to be like, well, good one. Good to know. I'm
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: going to stop trying to do things. I'm going to
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: stop attempting you things, and I'm going to remind you
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: how it's stupid you are, because I'm trying to protect you.
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: If I start to tell my brain or train my
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: brain every time I think of every time I get
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: this feeling, I'm going to associate this heightened feeling of
• 37:55
  Speaker 1: anxiety with this checklist of things that I can do. Now,
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: it could be this, it could be that. Then you
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: subconscious it's like, all right, well, every time you feel anxious,
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: I noticed that you're doing that regularly. Now I'm going
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: to take over and start doing that more often. And
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: that's that cognitive reappraisal. It's all these comic techniques, and
• 38:09
  Speaker 1: that is how you get to a regulated nervous system.
• 38:11
  Speaker 1: It starts off being very much like conscious, intentional, conscious actions,
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: but then eventually you'll notice that you start doing it automatically,
• 38:23
  Speaker 1: and that's when it gets really exciting. Now, if you
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: are someone with major depressive disorder or anxiety disorders, this
• 38:30
  Speaker 1: is something that can be done in conjunction with the
• 38:33
  Speaker 1: therapies that you're doing. Whether it be cognitive behavioral therapy,
• 38:36
  Speaker 1: whether it be medication that you're taking. These are things
• 38:39
  Speaker 1: that alongside therapy is to treat the disorder that you
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: might have. This can still be done and you can
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: still see changes in it. I did mention that in
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: those scans you were seeing that there was much more
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: of a difficulty with people with major depressive disorder and
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: borderline personality disorder. But it is still possible to have
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: that change. It's harder, but change can still be done,
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: and when we link it with other therapies, then that
• 39:05
  Speaker 1: change can happen sooner rather than later. Amazing, guys. That
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: is the episode of today. Love you guys so much.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: Thank you so much for tuning in to today's episode.
• 39:17
  Speaker 1: I really enjoyed fucking speaking to you. And please keep
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: sending me comments. I love reading the comments on the episodes.
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: It's very very cool and I just get a lot
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: of joy out of it. So yeah, let me know.
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: Keep letting me know what you're doing for your social media,
• 39:36
  Speaker 1: how you're taking back control for social media or getting
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: rid of it altogether, and how that's impacted your life.
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: I really enjoy that, and I will see you back
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: here next week. Do you know what I was thinking
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: about doing when I start my substack, which is tomorrow, guys,
• 39:50
  Speaker 1: I might do like a little mini episode where I
• 39:52
  Speaker 1: read out my first ever substack post as a mini
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: episode just to remind you guys to go and actually
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: subscribe on substack, because I want you guys all to
• 40:01
  Speaker 1: read my stuff there as well as listening to my
• 40:04
  Speaker 1: stuff here, so I can actually like talk to you
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: guys across both platforms about different things. It's very exciting.
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: I'm so pumped. I feel like I've got yet another
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: new lease of life. Not that I needed one, but
• 40:15
  Speaker 1: here's another one, and I'm just loving life. That is
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: all for today, guys, Thank you so much. As always,
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: remember becond to yourself, becu't to your breen, don't take
• 40:23
  Speaker 1: shit from anyone, and especially don't take shit from yourself.
• 40:26
  Speaker 1: Don't it