Latest / A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast / Tops & Bottoms Tens - Joe M bottoms classic Who

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Tops & Bottoms Tens - Joe M bottoms classic Who · A Hamster With a Blunt Penknife - a Doctor Who Commentary podcast

0:23
It's a new. Dawn, It's a new day.
0:26
It's a new. Life.
0:28
For Joanne and he's feeling go on.
0:35
Ooh. Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun Dun.
0:42
Welcome back to a hamster with a blunt pen knife.
0:46
The none Doctor Who Comments Harry podcast today.
0:51
Isn't that right, Joe? That is right.
0:52
It's still Doctor Who. She's not a commentary.
0:54
We're not doing a commentary, no.
0:56
We are starting off where we are in virgin territory today.
1:00
But fortunately we will be doing plenty of topping and bottoming.
1:05
So by the end of the call, we'll definitely no longer be virgin.
1:09
So I don't feel nervous about that.
1:10
Do you? No, you know, as long as it's
1:14
not just go. Just go gently.
1:17
Can I ask you what what are you sort of more nervous about sort
1:21
of topping or bottoming? Well, it's difficult to say.
1:24
Probably the bottoming, but you know, it's that's been a
1:26
lifelong goal and we'll get there eventually.
1:31
I knew I thought I'd get to know you today.
1:33
No, today Joe is going to. Be the. 1st guest as nominated
1:38
by Marv Wrath who just absolutely loves hearing your
1:42
opinions so. I don't understand how that's
1:45
happened, but thank you, Malcolm.
1:46
Well, there we go. You know, we're doing your top
1:50
ten and bottom 10 classic and new series episode Stroke
1:55
Stories ranked. Do you promise surprises?
2:00
You know, shocks. Yeah.
2:03
Revelations. Yeah, I'd say so.
2:05
Yeah. There's at least one revelation.
2:08
I Yeah, I have tried really hard to stay clear of the obvious
2:15
ones because there are some that I feel like you it's, it's too
2:21
easy to pick them either as bottom or tops.
2:24
I've, I've tried to avoid missing episodes because
2:27
otherwise it would just be a big long list of stuff that I
2:29
haven't actually seen because I don't think that's fair.
2:32
Stuff where the, you know, there's a couple where maybe the
2:34
animation's been particularly good that, that I feel like I've
2:36
been able to experience the episode and I've enjoyed and
2:39
I've put a couple of those in. But largely speaking, I've tried
2:42
to veer away from stuff where the city of death isn't in here,
2:46
despite the fact that it's spectacular.
2:49
But I didn't feel like, I felt like, you know, nobody needs
2:51
more wanging on about how good the City of Death is.
2:54
What I'm planning on doing is creating a spreadsheet, right?
2:58
So every time somebody does these lists, I'm going to add
3:00
them in and we're going to see what's the most nominated
3:03
stories, top and bottom as we go along, you know?
3:06
Yeah, that's going to be, Yeah. I don't think mine's going to be
3:08
very helpful for that, but it might be.
3:10
Well, you never know. I mean, you could be a basic
3:13
bitch for all we know. You know?
3:14
Well. I usually I usually am.
3:16
I think I've said before, I I consider my taste to be pretty
3:19
basic. The stuff that I, well,
3:21
actually, the difficulty I've had with putting this list
3:24
together is largely that I'm not, I've said to you before, a
3:27
particularly critical fan, I mostly just enjoy the show.
3:31
So like, I'm mostly, I'm getting on and it's very rare that I've
3:35
come away from any episode thinking, well, that was a heap
3:38
of shit. Really.
3:39
Yeah, even adopted a widow in the wardrobe.
3:41
No, because I think I watched that with my family at
3:43
Christmas, so it was like a nice, you know, but it's one of
3:46
them where I don't. The other thing I should say.
3:48
I get it, I get it. You looked at that family and
3:51
you thought, my God. Or at least we're not as weird
3:53
as them. Yes, we'll give it a pass.
3:55
Exactly. I think that's the other thing
3:57
as well is that I'm not a huge rewatcher.
3:59
So a lot of these right I so like I've only, I've seen most
4:03
of the classic series I've only seen once.
4:05
Most of the new stuff I've only really seen once apart from the
4:07
stuff I've rewatched with my lad.
4:09
So it's it's quite hard to put together a set of opinions based
4:14
on something that you're not, you've only seen once and it was
4:17
probably years ago. The classic stuff, like it was
4:19
really hard to make a bottom 10 list for either era where I
4:24
wasn't just thinking of stuff that I had very, I had nothing
4:27
to say about because I'm like it just I have no memory of even
4:30
having seen it. And they were.
4:31
OK, but that's a fair reason to put it in right is that none of
4:35
it's retained, whereas I'm sure your top ten list you do
4:38
remember things from. It yeah, absolutely for my like
4:42
for my top 10s that that's easy. There's something in each of
4:45
those that I'm like, this is this is what sticks in my mind.
4:50
But for the bottom 10s, it would be a very short podcast because
4:53
if we were only doing bottom 10s, I'd just read off a list
4:55
and go. I have seen them, do not know
4:57
anything about them. That's all right, Joe.
4:58
I don't remember what happens in the Bells.
5:00
St. John over.
5:02
Well, it's good. Well, that's gonna be.
5:03
Very powder dry that's. Yeah, OK.
5:06
That'll. Be OK?
5:07
Well, look, shall we? Let's go in because you got, I
5:11
mean, I figured we was doing clearly I was not clear with my
5:15
instructions. I clip figured we were doing a
5:16
list of 20 with classic and new all as one top and bomb.
5:21
But what you've prepared now I'm scared everybody is going to
5:24
prepare is 10 top and bottom for classic, 10 top and bottom for
5:30
new. Yeah.
5:31
Yeah. So let's get going.
5:36
Then Joe. Worst Classic 10.
5:42
I'm putting the mutants at the bottom I think.
5:45
The mutants. Ah right, so that six part John
5:47
Pertwee epic set on Sun loss. For exactly the reason that I
5:51
said before. I don't remember any of it and I
5:54
think I've tried to watch it twice.
5:56
I've definitely seen it all the way through once and I have
6:02
tried to watch it a second time and probably just fallen asleep.
6:05
I think it's just one of those stories where if it for some
6:08
reason, and this is true mostly with the missing stories where
6:11
I'll, you know, I have very few memories of like the smugglers
6:14
or the Highlanders because I've I've experienced them.
6:18
They just don't stick. It's full on.
6:21
My mind is just Teflon when it comes to this stuff.
6:23
Do you remember the sort of chubby Nazi with a swagger stick
6:27
going around? No.
6:29
No, I remember the fonts. I think the most interesting
6:31
thing is the fonts that they use.
6:33
It's very, it's a very on the all the walls, all the signage
6:37
is overlawed. Sylolians and all of.
6:39
That yeah, it's, it's got a, a very sort of sci-fi font.
6:43
And I think that's the only thing.
6:44
And I feel like if you're noticing the font that they're
6:46
using to decorate the walls with, you're just not having a
6:49
great time. So several people listening to
6:51
this now, yo and Morris, Joe Short, that guy.
6:54
What the mutants are you? Mad.
6:57
Well, I'm very much I, I read a thing once about Benito
7:01
Mussolini, that he was very much the sort of person who just
7:05
believed whatever the most recent thing he'd heard was.
7:06
And I don't think that's true for me in terms of my sort of
7:10
political outlook. But in terms of if I was to
7:13
listen to somebody talk effusively about the mutants for
7:17
three hours, I'd come away going.
7:19
That is clearly the best story that has ever been made.
7:21
And I'm wrong. But as it stands, I I cannot
7:25
tell you a thing about it. So it's got to go to the, it's
7:28
going to the bin. You know by pure chance, Joe,
7:30
you know yo Morrison and I are doing a mutants commentary
7:33
tomorrow, are you? Well, excellent.
7:37
I shall look forward to listening to that and I shall
7:39
let you know where, how far up it's moved after that.
7:45
Worst classic 9. See, this is what I I feel
7:49
guilty including because I've been really enjoying your recent
7:54
commentary on it. But I'm putting Delta in the
7:58
bannerman in there. Oh Oh my God, we must end the.
8:02
Call. Immediately.
8:04
OK, come on. Come on.
8:05
I think this is one of those ones where if I had, if I
8:08
watched it again, I think I'd probably have a lot of fun.
8:10
But this is during that handbrake turn from Colin into
8:13
McCoy that I just was really struggling with.
8:17
And I can hear again, I'm really enjoying your chat about it.
8:25
I think there's clearly a lot to enjoy with it, but at the time I
8:28
was just like what the fuck is this?
8:31
Because it's not rock'n'roll years, baby.
8:34
Yeah, because if you're just, you're just off the back of
8:36
trailer of time Rod and and this is where it goes next.
8:39
Yeah, most people find that I've turned a +1.
8:43
Yeah, I think it's just, it's just tonally, I think it was
8:45
sort of just too much for me because I didn't have a year
8:49
between series. I was, I went straight, straight
8:52
into, I went straight into the next series.
8:56
I went like, so it, it just felt, it just felt like too
8:59
much. And I think time with Irani,
9:05
again, my memory is terrible for the order in which these things
9:08
come, but it's delta #3 in that series or two.
9:11
Yeah. #3 so it, it literally feels like time of the rally,
9:18
it's bit he's being a bit weird because he's, he's just
9:21
regenerated or whatever. And so, you know, you allow that
9:26
he's finding himself, and then what comes next after that?
9:29
Paradise Towers. Paradise See, I love, I did like
9:32
I did love Paradise Towers, but that feels very trad.
9:35
That feels very Doctor Who doing Doctor Who stuff.
9:38
And I was like, oh, maybe the McCoy era is not as bad and
9:41
weird as people have said it is in the past.
9:44
And then Delta in the battlement hits me and I'm going, oh, OK,
9:47
this is this is a bit. Fucking is to the future.
9:50
Love is the answer. Yeah, I've listened to the
9:53
soundtrack since and I enjoyed that.
9:55
I think this is one of those stories where I definitely the
9:59
the problem is, isn't it is I've got a you know, I've got a life
10:02
and children and the job satellite.
10:06
Oh, it's it's very challenging, actually.
10:07
I don't really. Recommend it.
10:08
I'll just watch Doctor I. Was going to say yeah I your
10:11
thing sounds better but I if I listen.
10:15
Are you saying that within the? Earshot of your children.
10:17
No, they're going to bed. Oh good.
10:19
So the if I could get them to watch Doctor Who with me, it
10:24
would be fine. That's true.
10:25
Or as you said to me, I'm not turning it off.
10:27
All right. So if you get too scared, you
10:29
have to go away because I'm not turning it off.
10:31
Exactly what's the same anyway? The Elter and the bannermen.
10:35
I mean, I've never felt more like singing the Blues, as Billy
10:39
says in that episode. How sad.
10:41
Such a jolly happy story. Well, as I, as I've said many
10:45
times, Joe, I tend to assume the fault lies with me.
10:49
And I suspect. Me too, yes.
10:52
I think that what will happen is I'll I'll gladly go back and
10:55
watch this and I'm happy to you know, if we did this, if I
10:59
started the classic series again, I kind of know what I was
11:02
in for. So I think doing it that odd of
11:06
really, it really makes you feel that shift.
11:08
I do get it though, it is about as silly, you know, and as sort
11:14
of high octane ridiculous as Doctor Who gets.
11:17
I mean, the the assassins are taken out by honey and a sound
11:21
system and things like that. I do get that people that want
11:25
Doctor Who to be a bit more serious than that might go, oh
11:28
God, no one's taking anything seriously.
11:30
So I get it. It is a taste thing.
11:33
Yeah, I think it feels like an episode of The Goodies or
11:36
something like that. Where?
11:37
Wonderful. Yeah, that's the thing, right.
11:40
But if I turn an episode of The Goodies, I know what I'm
11:41
getting. Whereas that it's not
11:43
necessarily what I come to Doctor Who for, but it's I think
11:46
it may have been shock. I might have just been in shock.
11:49
But when I was making the list, I was trying to find ones that
11:51
was like, what did I actually actively dislike?
11:55
And. Delta and the Badderman was
11:58
there. Well, it's sad, but it's going
12:01
to go on my spreadsheet now. Worst classic?
12:07
I'm going to been planet fire I think.
12:10
Oh no, why you don't want to see Turlo in his pants?
12:15
I'll keep that bit. You don't want to see Nicola
12:17
Bryant in her bikini. I'll keep that bit too.
12:20
Oh yeah, I. Was forgetting.
12:24
But the rest of it? Yeah, it's another one of those
12:27
ones that just made very little impression.
12:28
I like, I like the, I like a lot of the ideas.
12:30
I like, you know, the idea that we're going back to tell us
12:34
home. He as a companion has never made
12:37
a huge impression on me, to be honest.
12:42
I don't like, I don't mind him. Like, I like some of his stories
12:46
well enough. But if I'm listing companions,
12:48
I'm thinking about companions. He's one that I struggle to
12:50
remember exists not in an unkind way.
12:53
My memory is terrible. I think it's just a bit the the
13:01
contrast between Lanzarote and what the hell is it even called
13:06
Tryon. San.
13:08
San the fact that these there's just not enough of a difference
13:15
between. Them but the trade off is you
13:17
don't get the location work. I've never understand that
13:20
argument because I feel like we're.
13:22
Fine, fine, then we won't do it and we'll just go.
13:24
Down the quarry instead. Yeah, I like the quarry.
13:27
It's nice. No good.
13:29
You should watch Doctor O then. I do welcome to have some, Yeah.
13:39
It's just, it's one of those ones where I'm going to, I'm
13:41
going to really struggle to say much more than that because I I
13:44
just, it's made very little impression.
13:46
Is it because it's really, really boring?
13:49
Yes. Well, let's move on then.
13:54
Worst classic 7. Do you think Warriors gates go
13:58
in here? Well, you don't need to go on
14:01
too much about this one. Because we've got a 2 1/2 hour
14:04
commentary on it due to come out.
14:07
Exactly, exactly. So I figured this one we can
14:10
sort of just rush past if you like, because you've just.
14:12
Got to say that. Just Warriors gate, yeah.
14:15
Yeah, yeah, no, it's boring and it's stupid and it's space line
14:18
and it's tedious. Well, that's my argument for you
14:21
liking all the sort of oddball stories out the window.
14:25
Yeah, well, I like it when they work.
14:28
Oh bitch. I just, I just think it's, it's
14:31
very tedious and I don't think a lot of it works and I don't
14:34
think it's makes any sense. Moving.
14:36
On Yeah, Please please feel free to listen to a lot more opinions
14:43
of. That didn't even like the good
14:45
damn robots. I mean, come on now.
14:47
They're just stupid. Why are they there?
14:49
I don't understand because I got not sound too any Arnold about
14:53
the whole thing, but it's just done and it doesn't work.
14:58
Worst classic 6. Battlefield is shit.
15:03
Oh my God. Oh dear, we've just lost half
15:07
the audience. Explain why.
15:11
I just, I think this is in that category of ones that feel like
15:16
the sort of thing that was on CBBC when I was a kid and when I
15:21
was watching it. I'm really just didn't get on
15:25
with it and I think it's one of those again, where if I watched
15:28
it back, I think there's some great stuff like the Destroyer
15:30
is great. The I like the idea of there
15:37
being new unit team. The first time I saw it, I
15:43
didn't know who the Brigadier was because I've never seen any
15:46
of the classic stuff. So none of that really meant
15:48
anything to me. So I'm sure that was, you know,
15:51
it's very difficult now to extract myself from having
15:53
experienced it that first time without the nostalgic kick of
15:56
going, oh, this is really special that he's in this.
16:00
Yeah, it's one that's going to hit you differently if you're
16:02
like a long term fan of Classic Who and then you watch this.
16:06
It's actually. Coming back to it.
16:08
It's my. It's my birth story as well.
16:10
It's the one that I was born closest to.
16:12
It's my. First one as well, my first
16:14
watched. It might have been my first
16:16
McCoy. I think I said that about
16:18
something else earlier, but I think I said that about Silver
16:20
Nemesis. But I think it was Battlefield.
16:24
And I just don't think Sylvester McCoy feels to me like one of
16:28
those ones where like my blood asked me earlier, who's your
16:31
least favorite doctor? And unfortunately for Sylvie's
16:35
always going to be the bottom. I don't think there's ever been
16:37
one that's. Obviously a man talking sense on
16:40
this podcast. It's just, it's too hit and
16:42
miss. I don't, you know, I don't, I
16:45
don't dislike any of them really.
16:49
Like, I think they've all done a good job in their own way.
16:51
But McCoy is just not, it's just not for me, which is why I've
16:57
worked so hard to really enjoy some of the stuff, the other
16:59
stuff that he's done. And I think in Battlefield, I
17:04
just think he's too, he's too Sylvester Mackay, the Merlin
17:06
stuff's bullshit and it's just stupid.
17:08
What? Do you mean it sounds like CBBCI
17:11
heard you. You call me stupid.
17:13
Now listen here, you dirty toe rag.
17:15
It's. Literally the voice of Dennis
17:17
the Menace. It is.
17:19
It is OK Battlefield Wow 3. Mccoys in one list.
17:24
I can imagine everyone's now is like scampering back to their
17:27
lists and they're like, right, if he's going to shit on three
17:29
Mccoys, I'm going to put all the Mccoys.
17:31
In my top list. That's fine, I.
17:34
I love the fact that you're irritating so many.
17:36
It's the best. McCoy happens with this list.
17:39
That's why. To be fair though, that's never
17:41
my intention, but I did feel like I couldn't.
17:45
That's why greatest show ended up in the top because I just.
17:48
I don't. I don't want to shit on anyone
17:50
from a great but. It's not really balance, it's 3
17:52
to 1 so far. Yeah, that's true.
17:54
And to be fair, not a shoot he's ended up in my top ones.
17:56
I don't think so. Oh dear, Oh dear, Oh dear.
17:59
Well, wouldn't it be mad? Wouldn't it be mad if my top one
18:01
ever was fucking? Dot and bubble.
18:05
Dot and bubble. Worst classic 5.
18:11
I'm going with the edge of destruction.
18:14
I have the poor edge of destruction.
18:16
It's a very innocent little 2 parter.
18:18
I know it feels a bit mean really, because I know it was
18:20
done out of desperation. It's another one of those,
18:22
wasn't it? I feel like it, it just makes, I
18:25
think it makes it really clear how much of the show is based on
18:29
desperation and trying to just couple things together.
18:32
Because I feel like we've talked about that particular facet on
18:35
every single one of these. But the edge of destruction
18:38
just, it's just, it's just stupid, isn't it?
18:41
It doesn't make any sense Why she what is she doing with those
18:43
scissors? Why?
18:44
Why is any of this happening? It's just sort of a little
18:47
spring, isn't it, that goes wrong.
18:49
Yeah, yeah. It just feels like a lot of
18:52
trouble for not an awful lot. And given that the first story,
18:55
the story that precedes it, is also largely precipitated by
18:59
something a small figment of the TARDIS going wrong.
19:04
You could start to think that the TARDIS is actually a bit
19:06
knackered. Yeah, to be fair, I suppose it's
19:09
not like that. It's not like they've dropped
19:10
that particular fuss it for a while, sorry.
19:15
In the next story, you know the TARDIS breaks down completely,
19:18
doesn't it, in Marco Polo? And there's literal
19:21
precipitation, the well chosen word there.
19:25
Yeah, I was. I was.
19:26
I reached in the back of my mind for that one.
19:29
But yeah, no, you're right, it is constantly fucked.
19:33
But I think it's just one of those ones where I just, it's
19:37
very unsatisfying, isn't it? Because you get to the end of it
19:40
and none of it, it mattered. Nobody's apart from this.
19:43
You know, the lovely, the lovely scene with the Doctor and
19:45
Barbara kind of just making up at the end.
19:46
That's nice. But like largely it would be the
19:50
same if none of that had happened.
19:52
You just went straight into Marco Bolo.
19:54
You could. Probably do it.
19:55
I mean, I can see what they're trying to do, but sort of the
19:59
plot, you're right in no sense at all.
20:02
So they are, they're sort of making them as fractious as
20:04
they've ever been and then solving the problem together.
20:07
It's just a problem they're solving is stupid.
20:11
Yeah. Well, that's the thing I've said
20:13
before somewhere. I can't remember where I've said
20:15
it, but most of Doctor Who is just trying something new and
20:19
largely failing it. But at least they're trying.
20:22
But it feels like as I'm talking about this list, I'm just
20:25
realizing how much of it's just like whether I enjoy it is
20:29
hinged solely on whether or not I find that the weird thing that
20:32
they're trying to do works. Like Ori's Gate at the edge of
20:36
destruction of both in this list, even though on paper they
20:39
should be things I admire and enjoy because they are trying
20:43
something interesting and different.
20:48
Worst classic? Celestial Time Maker.
20:55
Oh dear. OK, not a fan of Dodo, no.
20:59
I'm not, I'm not a fan of Dodo. I really like the Ark.
21:02
The Ark was a contender for being in there.
21:03
I like, I like her in that. I just think the Celestial time
21:06
maker is, I feel like I'm repeating myself here.
21:10
They it's a swing and a miss. They're trying something really
21:12
ambitious and it might be different if we could see it
21:14
properly. I really liked the animation.
21:16
I thought it was the right story to try that with.
21:19
So not the most bearable it's ever been.
21:21
Yeah, exactly. But it's one of those ones where
21:23
I just what? What is it like?
21:28
It doesn't really make any sense.
21:33
I've never been a huge fan of the sort of the universe ending
21:38
villain where there's this huge, especially because the stakes
21:42
make no sense that he's just sat there with a fucking pile of
21:45
board games just going, oh, somebody play with me.
21:48
It's just and board games are so boring, aren't they?
21:51
Yeah, I don't mind the odd one, but I don't want to be playing
21:53
it with like a sort of sort of weirdo from the end of the
21:57
universe where he's threatening to keep me in a box or.
21:58
Whatever racist weirdo from the end of the universe dressed up
22:01
like a Chinese Mandarin. Yeah, I never really.
22:06
I don't want to get into this conversation.
22:07
I didn't. I would have never for a second,
22:09
because I was not familiar at all with the use of the word
22:13
celestial for any sort of racial connotation when I came to the
22:16
story. Celestial just means from the
22:17
stars. Well, don't worry, Charles.
22:19
There's plenty of this new young woke generation that will remind
22:22
you of that. All right, well.
22:23
I'm sure, yeah. But that's the thing.
22:25
Like the reason Celestial Time Maker is bad is not because it's
22:27
racist, it's because it's boring.
22:29
It does have the N word in it though.
22:31
It does, but not. But crucially, none of none of
22:35
the words that people would have you believe it was racist for.
22:39
But that feels like I'm in dodgy territory and should steer away
22:43
from that quite quickly. Bounces across, then I'll tell
22:48
you what. To sorry, go on.
22:51
No, I was just going to say it doesn't matter.
22:52
Excited. We we would have said when I was
22:56
a kid, it would have been catch a nipper, which I don't know
22:59
what a nipper is. I assume it's just a, you know,
23:03
clumsy changing of letters, but my kids would have been taught
23:08
Tiger in school and every time they start it, it still makes me
23:11
nervous. I mean, clumsy, like falling
23:14
down the stairs. Clumsy though.
23:15
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Worst classic?
23:22
3. I think Sylvan Nemesis is utter
23:26
trash. Oh, James Lark is weeping right
23:32
now. I'm sorry, James.
23:33
We write to Destiny here. It's another one of those ones
23:37
where I think it sort of, it might it maybe it's the, maybe
23:41
it's the wish world of the classic series.
23:44
It's it's trying too hard to do too many different things.
23:47
And each one of, you know, Steven Moffett said recently
23:50
didn't in that interview about, you know, maybe it's not even
23:53
recently. Maybe it was 20 years ago.
23:55
I don't fucking know that with Doctor Who you're trying to
23:58
write a new film every week and you need enough ideas to do a
24:02
series where each one of those ideas could be a feature film or
24:06
even just an idea for a series on its own.
24:08
Silver Nemesis takes 3 or 4 of the ideas that could have been
24:12
an individual episode and for some reason tries to do them all
24:14
in one go. And then the Cybermen set up as
24:16
well. And it's just it, it's it's a
24:20
noble effort. I don't think it works.
24:24
It's another one of those ones where it's.
24:25
A mess. Isn't it obviously?
24:27
Yeah, it's a shit tip. It's one of those ones where
24:29
I've seen it, but I have seen this one more than once.
24:31
I think this might have been the first McCoy I ever watched.
24:33
So I'm trying to think when it came out on on DVD, whether it
24:38
was on its own or if it was in a box with anything else.
24:42
But it would have been at the point where I was just going
24:44
randomly and collecting DVDs and see what was available in the in
24:49
the second hand shops. I don't know why I'm avoiding
24:53
saying CEX like I'm like, I'm on the BBC and it's you're going to
24:57
get. See eggs.
24:58
I get stuck from there all the time.
25:00
Yeah, I don't. Yeah, I was.
25:01
I don't know why I was avoiding saying it like it.
25:03
Was certain type working in there that sort of grungy types
25:06
with sort of dyed hair, you know, and and they're sort of
25:09
big blokes with greasy hair, you know, cliche, but there it is
25:15
no. No, it's basically everyone I
25:17
was friends with in college I think.
25:18
But like. But I was never I was never as
25:21
cool or greasy as them so. Boy, putting those two in your
25:24
bottom 10 list out on the banner Men and Silver Nemesis there's.
25:28
Going to be some. Very unhappy people there, which
25:30
makes me very happy indeed. Worst classic 2.
25:39
I think that Revenge of the Cybermen is a bad story.
25:46
You think Revenge of the Cybermen is a bad story?
25:49
I couldn't tell if your screen had frozen there.
25:51
I thought it might have. Yeah.
25:54
Oh, it's terrible. I was just saying I was getting
25:56
my power to dry. I mean Jesus.
25:58
Christ, I've heard, I've heard that episode of Strictly.
26:01
So I know, I know how your feelings lie, but I just it's
26:04
one of those things where it's such, I think season 12 is
26:08
largely brilliant and it's such a great start.
26:12
But like he's just Tom Baker is magic from the off.
26:17
And then for some reason, Revenge of the Cybermen is on
26:19
the end of it and it's just really, really bad.
26:23
Like it's just, I can't. It's an all those stories where
26:24
I can remember so little of what happens, but it's just boring.
26:30
Like we've already been on that spaceship and had a great story,
26:32
so why are we going back to that spaceship and having a boring
26:34
story? It makes no sense.
26:35
It was a savvy move for Barry Letts and Terror Sticks to
26:39
Commission a Dalek and a Cybermen story for Tom's first
26:41
season. Right, Let's get the big hitters
26:43
in. Let's get people watching.
26:45
What's weird is they give us the most gripping Dalek story ever
26:50
and totally fudge the Cybermen. Yeah, it that's, that's what's
26:54
so odd about, isn't it? Because I think, you know, arc
26:57
in space was another contender, I think for for my top list
27:01
because it's because it's brilliant.
27:04
And I think it I think it's telling with arc that that's one
27:08
that RTD and Moffat both have said I think was was their
27:11
favorite story or something along those lines.
27:14
So clearly this this series was firing on all cylinders, but it
27:20
just feels like they've just dribbled out at the end.
27:23
Well, this, this is the bit of, you know, when you've had a big
27:25
wee and then you put it back in your trousers and a little bit
27:29
more. Oh.
27:30
God, so annoying, isn't it that. Little bit of wee is revenge of
27:33
the Cyber. Yes, that's a great.
27:37
Squish, all right, Sort of the sort of poggy bit that stays in
27:42
your in your pants for the rest of the day, just like, change
27:45
them. I thought we were finished, but
27:46
now I've pissed myself. Now I've got to live with that.
27:50
I've got to live with that for the rest of my day.
27:53
Let's go, let's do the new series, because you're not going
27:56
to top that as a description for Revenge of the Siren Man now.
27:59
I was quite pleased with that's finished, right?
28:02
So what? Last dribble of piss.
28:07
Worst classic? One, I think the Invasion of
28:13
Time is dull as shit. Oh dear, it won the strictly
28:19
come. Hamster of that year.
28:20
But that's never a mark of quality.
28:23
No, that is certainly true. I just think it's too long and
28:31
it's, I don't know, Joe, I don't know.
28:36
I just think it's really silly. It's too long, it's got great
28:39
foil monsters. The Sontaras are shit.
28:43
It looks cheap. How am I doing?
28:46
Yeah, no, that's yeah. Do you know what that that'll
28:48
do? I think the Vardens are a great
28:50
idea. They're one of the best audio
28:51
monsters. I think when I've heard stuff
28:53
with the Vardens on audio, they they make loads of sense.
28:55
They're a great idea. And I just think it's one of
28:58
those where I don't, I don't, I don't care for it.
29:02
There's no need for Thomas to be prant about like that.
29:07
Well, we'll move on from that one then, shall we?
29:09
It is. It is poor.
29:11
That is all I was going to say even.
29:14
That works for me. Even the bit with the swimming
29:16
pool is poor. Yeah, when that suntaran trips
29:19
into that enormous vagina plant. Well, Doctor Who, you get a new
29:24
low. Yeah, that's the GIF I sent to
29:26
my wife when I'd like to initiate intercourse.
29:30
Oh, I'll start using that remark.
29:31
Shut up. Yeah.
29:33
I know, I'll just send him a picture of Erato fully erect.
29:36
Yeah, that'll do it. Yeah.
29:39
If he's green though, you do need to go to see a doctor.
29:46
Did you like that? Did that list make you
29:48
incandescent with rage? Were you punching the air at
29:52
Joe's choices? Well, we'll be back tomorrow
29:55
with Joe's Top 10 Classic series.