Latest / Darren “Whackhead” Simpson’s prank calls on Kfm Mornings / Senseless Survey: Does trimming your toenails count as doing abdominal exercise?
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: So here we go, Here we go. Here is another
- 0:04Speaker 1: senseless survey from Darren Wackhead Simpson on KFM Mornings.
- 0:09Speaker 2: KFM Mornings.
- 0:12Speaker 1: Okay, let's do this Monday senseless survey time. This is
- 0:16Speaker 1: where I ask a random person of South Africa. Sometimes
- 0:22Speaker 1: it's an international person. How many very important questions about
- 0:29Speaker 1: the about the the survival of South Africa and survive
- 0:36Speaker 1: questions that you know it's.
- 0:39Speaker 2: To keep this country together.
- 0:41Speaker 1: Yes to to you know, prolong the existential crisis. So
- 0:47Speaker 1: it's important questions and we see how long they stay on.
- 0:52Speaker 1: They eventually all put down. So all these questions are
- 0:56Speaker 1: totally senseless, nonsense nonsense questions, of course, how many will
- 1:01Speaker 1: I get through? Sherlin, give me a guess? Twelve twelve,
- 1:05Speaker 1: very good guess, ten ten, also very good GUESSMI eleven
- 1:12Speaker 1: very good guests You see producer bread fourteen fourteen questions,
- 1:17Speaker 1: terrible guess with just friend. Okay, Sherlin serbs remains. You're
- 1:23Speaker 1: all somewhere on one side of it and one nailed
- 1:26Speaker 1: it bang in the middle. Ramise, can't from honeymoon come
- 1:30Speaker 1: back with wisdom? Thank you very much? Hey, yes, good,
- 1:34Speaker 1: how was the honeymoon lovely.
- 1:36Speaker 2: Life is great, guys, and we love in an amazing,
- 1:39Speaker 2: amazing country. He's literally in the honeymoon pace.
- 1:42Speaker 1: Yeah.
- 1:42Speaker 2: So we went out to n Eisner over the over
- 1:46Speaker 2: the last week and.
- 1:48Speaker 1: Wow, how was the weather?
- 1:50Speaker 2: No, it was perfect, not too hot, not too cold,
- 1:53Speaker 2: just right. And wow, Guyssner is a spectacular piece of
- 1:58Speaker 2: this earth. Really is.
- 2:00Speaker 1: Yeah? Absolutely, So you were married? Yes, you're now what
- 2:05Speaker 1: six days? Seven days in seven seven days married? Wonderful
- 2:11Speaker 1: congrats remy.
- 2:12Speaker 2: Look at that broad smile.
- 2:14Speaker 1: Hey is a happy, happy man. So you're going home
- 2:17Speaker 1: to your wife after this.
- 2:21Speaker 2: When she gets home from work.
- 2:22Speaker 1: You tell me about your day and then sits in.
- 2:29Speaker 1: Is going to be food on the table or you cooking?
- 2:33Speaker 1: What's the deal? No?
- 2:34Speaker 2: So he just she actually just misses me now a
- 2:36Speaker 2: little bit of a closely list. I was like, okay, cool,
- 2:39Speaker 2: I'll go and get those things for this evening.
- 2:41Speaker 1: Domestic Look at husband, husband's got a list. What's for
- 2:45Speaker 1: dinner tonight? My wife? Let me tell you kitty about it?
- 2:51Speaker 1: And hours too. You know, the first time you actually
- 2:54Speaker 1: look at your wife and you say you're my wife,
- 2:58Speaker 1: it's just quite a statements beautiful. So my word, I
- 3:02Speaker 1: think it's Rama's new favorite word. Hey wife, I.
- 3:07Speaker 2: See that quite a bit of today we've been talking about.
- 3:12Speaker 1: Tell us more about your wife.
- 3:13Speaker 2: My wife.
- 3:14Speaker 1: Yeah, your wife. You get it right there, we go. Okay,
- 3:21Speaker 1: on the no more takers on the WhatsApp telephone. Let's
- 3:25Speaker 1: do the senseless survey. Here come a bunch of you'll
- 3:29Speaker 1: call them ridiculous, I'll call them important questions.
- 3:33Speaker 3: Good morning. It's also she's been.
- 3:36Speaker 1: Good morning, sir. Imagine three one nine six. I'm calling
- 3:38Speaker 1: you from the Census Bureau. I just need to ask
- 3:40Speaker 1: you a couple of questions for your country. It won't
- 3:42Speaker 1: take more than about five seconds. Okay, how much time
- 3:47Speaker 1: do you spend practicing picking up stuff with your feet?
- 3:53Speaker 3: Very rare, It's very rare. I would only do it
- 3:55Speaker 3: when I'm feeling lazy to Actually, it's.
- 3:59Speaker 1: Owning a dog more popular than a horse because they
- 4:02Speaker 1: are easier to spoon.
- 4:06Speaker 3: Yes, i'll see, so, I mean a horse would lead
- 4:10Speaker 3: you to have a bigger yard than the dog.
- 4:12Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Does trimming your toenails count as abdominal exercise?
- 4:20Speaker 3: Never looked at it that way, But when I imagine
- 4:23Speaker 3: doing that actual deed, I'll say it must have a
- 4:25Speaker 3: little bit of impact is.
- 4:27Speaker 1: The ultimate rollerblading trick, riding them without disappointing your parents.
- 4:35Speaker 3: No, I mean, I'm sure it's such a sport it
- 4:38Speaker 3: would be impressive.
- 4:39Speaker 1: Actually, so when did you realize that Hello Kitty actually
- 4:43Speaker 1: has no mouth?
- 4:48Speaker 3: I haven't know what of that, however. Actually, I'll pay
- 4:53Speaker 3: attention for today. I remember by my daughter hello kity
- 4:56Speaker 3: t shirt, and I didn't even see that?
- 4:59Speaker 2: Good man?
- 4:59Speaker 1: Are you it's okay with calling cuff links what they
- 5:02Speaker 1: really are? Sleeve ear rings?
- 5:07Speaker 3: I call them that.
- 5:08Speaker 1: Yes. Do you think we missed an opportunity when we
- 5:11Speaker 1: called people who fixed dogs vets instead of dogters?
- 5:23Speaker 3: So?
- 5:24Speaker 1: Do you know that we do not check the refrigerator
- 5:26Speaker 1: multiple times to find new food. We check to see
- 5:29Speaker 1: if our standards have dropped enough to eat what was available. Yeah?
- 5:36Speaker 3: Sometimes?
- 5:36Speaker 2: Yes.
- 5:37Speaker 1: You know your youth is over when people stop being
- 5:40Speaker 1: impressed by how much you can drink and they start
- 5:44Speaker 1: to become concerned. Yes, I think people anytime someone does.
- 5:54Speaker 1: Do you think we should tie their shoelaces together in
- 5:57Speaker 1: case of a zombie apocalypse? Yeah? No? So do you
- 6:03Speaker 1: know that Spider Man has absolutely no way of hiding
- 6:07Speaker 1: an erection? Well? No, he gave all those credit to him.
- 6:24Speaker 2: Yeah, no quality human.
- 6:25Speaker 1: You can tell you didn't have to do spidy like that.
- 6:35Speaker 1: You're sick, there's there's medicine for that, don't worry. Yeah,
- 6:41Speaker 1: all right, there is. It's like you want to know,
- 6:44Speaker 1: you want to know when you like really, you know,
- 6:47Speaker 1: we always think we're young, but you know people might
- 6:49Speaker 1: perceive us as old. Okay, you want to know what's
- 6:52Speaker 1: a big defining factor that I've realized. If you are
- 6:56Speaker 1: not in your own mind of how people perceive you,
- 7:00Speaker 1: are you young or are you old? Okay? So you
- 7:04Speaker 1: know you you are young. If when you trip and
- 7:10Speaker 1: fall and people laugh, you are old. If when you
- 7:14Speaker 1: trip in four people rush up to you and go,
- 7:17Speaker 1: are you okay? Are you okay? Are you okay? Who
- 7:20Speaker 1: can I help you out? Can help you? So trip
- 7:23Speaker 1: and fall today and look around and see people's reactions,
- 7:27Speaker 1: and by that very deduction, you will decide on the
- 7:29Speaker 1: spot there on the floor whether or not you are
- 7:32Speaker 1: young or old. All right, I'd like to think people
- 7:35Speaker 1: are still laughing at me if I trip and four