Latest / Funny Comedy | Laugh Out Loud / S2 Ep1: 12 Comics Who'll Make You Laugh Out Loud🤣

Transcript

S2 Ep1: 12 Comics Who'll Make You Laugh Out Loud🤣 · Funny Comedy | Laugh Out Loud

• 0:18
  SPEAKER_06: Yellow HPV.
• 0:28
  SPEAKER_06: Felt like a weird icebreaker.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_06: I like it.
• 0:32
  SPEAKER_06: What if you do?
• 0:33
  SPEAKER_06: A third of you do, statistically.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_06: No.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_06: I feel good.
• 0:40
  SPEAKER_06: I uh I don't have it, I don't think.
• 0:44
  SPEAKER_06: Um if you were wondering.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_06: I feel pretty good.
• 0:49
  SPEAKER_06: My weight fluctuates a lot, so it's good I feel good.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_06: I I don't know.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_06: I go anywhere from like 150 to 250 on a given day.
• 0:59
  SPEAKER_06: Anybody else like that?
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_06: No, just me.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_06: I can't tell.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_06: I it's it gets so bad now that my weight has become a measure of time.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_06: Like I saw a friend of mine, another comedian, his name is Big Keith.
• 1:11
  SPEAKER_06: He's obviously a black comedian.
• 1:15
  SPEAKER_06: And I hadn't seen him in years, and I walked over, I saw him, and he he walked, he saw me at a comedy club.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_06: He was like, damn, I ain't seen you since you was fat, skinny, and then fat again.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_06: I was like, yeah, you could have just said like three years, man.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_06: This is kind of hurtful a way to do it, but whatever.
• 1:34
  SPEAKER_06: I do commercials a lot, so uh it helps that I'm chubby every now and then.
• 1:38
  SPEAKER_06: And that I I have black, I'm black, curly hair, chubby, so obviously I go into commercials where it's like uh, mmm, this tastes good.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_06: Like that's is this just a burger?
• 1:51
  SPEAKER_06: This is different than a burger.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_06: This got bacon on it.
• 1:57
  SPEAKER_06: But I so I go on auditions and that's usually what I do, where I like walk in and then pretend to try a burger and then like move forward.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_06: Sometimes though I go on auditions and they have no words at all.
• 2:06
  SPEAKER_06: Like they'll be like, Can you just show us how you smile?
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_06: And then I walk in, I go, Because I forget what part they want me for, but I want the part of like the small little white girl in the commercial.
• 2:22
  SPEAKER_06: Because that looks so much fun.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_06: I want that role.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_13: I know why we're in this mess.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_13: I've identified the culprit.
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_13: There's one source of the decay of human civilization, and that is a particular trend in home decor.
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_13: Now, some of you have this up in your house right now.
• 2:43
  SPEAKER_13: And what it is, is inspirational quotes on rustic pieces of driftwood in multiple fonts.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_13: You know what I'm talking about.
• 2:57
  SPEAKER_13: Now, as we know, for the quote to go on the rustic piece of driftwood, it must feature one of the keywords.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_13: If it doesn't have one of these keywords in the quote, it's not inspirational enough.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_13: Do not put it on wood, don't waste our time.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_13: Those words include journey, faith, hope, sister, live, laugh, love, you know what I'm talking about.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_13: Kitchen.
• 3:25
  SPEAKER_13: The whole set is me just listing the words.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_13: The whole show is just this.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_13: Wine.
• 3:34
  SPEAKER_13: Blessed.
• 3:36
  SPEAKER_13: Believe.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_13: Believe.
• 3:39
  SPEAKER_13: Believe is so powerful.
• 3:40
  SPEAKER_13: It's so potent.
• 3:42
  SPEAKER_13: It can live by itself on a piece of driftwood.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_13: Some people don't even put it on wood, some people just tattoo it on the front of their neck, and that's a choice.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_13: But how does it work?
• 3:58
  SPEAKER_13: Like if you need a sign to remind you to laugh, are you alright?
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_13: You go through your house and you see it, and you're like, oh, I almost forgot.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_13: Ha ha ha ha ha! Like, talk to someone.
• 4:10
  SPEAKER_13: You were not okay.
• 4:15
  SPEAKER_13: I always do feel a little bit bad when I tell that joke.
• 4:18
  SPEAKER_13: Because there's usually at least one woman's face in the crowd just dissolving off her head.
• 4:23
  SPEAKER_13: She's just like, oh no.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_13: That's me.
• 4:29
  SPEAKER_11: Yeah, it's you could get away with whatever you want if you have a cute accent, but I think the opposite is true if you have a thick, regional American accent.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_11: Then you can't get away with anything because everyone thinks you're dumb as shit.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_11: And it's super unfair, you know.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_11: Like I grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, which has a very trashy accent.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_11: And it's so unfair because there are people in Pittsburgh with that accent who are very, very smart.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_11: But are they?
• 5:16
  SPEAKER_11: Even the people in Pittsburgh who are in positions where you know just to get there, they have to be smart.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_11: Like imagine being in a courtroom in Pittsburgh, and the judge walks in, looking very distinguished, wearing the robe, and then he sits down and opens his mouth and says, Okay, so nobody freak out or nothing, but uh jurors deliberated and concluded defendant's guilty beyond a reasonable bat.
• 5:50
  SPEAKER_11: You'd be like, uh, are you sure?
• 5:56
  SPEAKER_11: Can we put you in jail?
• 5:58
  SPEAKER_11: Is that an option to put the judge in jail?
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_11: No reason I say is because the way you talk makes it sound like you've maybe stabbed someone over a sausage argument.
• 6:12
  SPEAKER_12: This guy's trying to freaking tell me kill bosses, not top five sausage?
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_12: What am I supposed to do?
• 6:17
  SPEAKER_12: Not shank them?
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_12: Friggin' get out of here.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_11: That's how people talk in Pittsburgh.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_11: And sausage is like a top priority for most of the people I grew up with in Pittsburgh.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_09: I like to do drugs because they made me feel good.
• 6:34
  SPEAKER_09: One thing I like to do when I'm really bored is I like to get really high.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_09: And then I like to go to that Google Maps and I go to the street view and I just drive.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_09: See what's out there in that great big world of ours, you know.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_09: Put a little desk fan there, feel the wind in my hair.
• 7:04
  SPEAKER_09: Really live, you know.
• 7:07
  SPEAKER_09: I do smoke weed, but I don't wake and bake.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_09: I woke and coke.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_09: Really gets the eight-ball rolling, you know.
• 7:22
  SPEAKER_09: Do you guys notice back in the day they actually used to put cocaine in Coca-Cola?
• 7:30
  SPEAKER_09: Do you know you still can?
• 7:39
  SPEAKER_09: That's what you call a Coca-Cola classic.
• 7:45
  SPEAKER_08: My last girlfriend won our breakup.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_08: If you guys are thinking, Charles, breakups aren't a thing, you can win or lose.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_08: That's true, but also grow up.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_08: This is how you win a breakup.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_08: You move on first, that's like 80 points.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_08: You start dating somebody new, that's like 200 points.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_08: And then you post pictures of you and that new person getting cocktails at the bar in the ace hotel.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_08: And then it's game over, you win, Kate! I uh I was looking at my ex-girlfriend's Instagram profile the other day.
• 8:31
  SPEAKER_08: Which, by the way, is how you lose a breakup.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_08: She's at the ace hotel with the new guy, tag the ace hotel, tag the new guy, I start looking at the new guy's profile, and everything in my body is telling me to hate him.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_08: Everything is saying, hate this man.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_08: But he had an awesome summer.
• 9:06
  SPEAKER_08: He killed it last summer, and I can't take that away from the guy.
• 9:09
  SPEAKER_08: You know.
• 9:10
  SPEAKER_08: He went to Coachella both nights, had a bunch of barbecues on rooftops, went kayaking with his best friend Mike.
• 9:21
  SPEAKER_08: I start looking at Mike's profile.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_08: Mike, I couldn't really get on board with, he was a little too broy for me.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_08: But he did take time out 27 weeks ago to go to his sister's graduation.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_08: Allow me now to say congratulations, Christina! She graduated from the University of Minnesota with a degree in English with her best friend Margaret.
• 9:55
  SPEAKER_08: I started looking at Margaret's profile.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_08: If there's anything I can tell you about Margaret, it's that she loves the party and she loves her dog.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_08: I started looking at Margaret's dog's profile.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_08: And then I accidentally liked one of Margaret's dog's photos.
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_08: And I was just like, oh shit.
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_08: Like, can they trace this all the way back to me?
• 10:38
  SPEAKER_08: So I unliked it.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_08: But then I remembered if you like something and then you unlike it, they can see that you liked it and that you unliked it.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_08: Yes, it's true.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_08: Sorry, but you are busted.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_08: Now you know, don't do it again.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_08: Uh yeah, they can see it.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_08: Um, so I decided, you know what?
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_08: I'm just gonna like it.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_08: Because if I'm gonna go out, I'ma go out like a G.
• 11:22
  SPEAKER_08: And that's when I realized I'd been sitting on the toilet for two hours.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_08: And it was time to get back to work.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: I got engaged when I was 21.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_01: Isn't that stupid?
• 11:38
  SPEAKER_01: That's some Indiana shit, man.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody on the coast is like, I'm 59, I'm still young, you know.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_01: In Indiana, if you're not married by 26, you're legally gay.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_01: It's f up.
• 11:48
  SPEAKER_01: You're not allowed to like vote or use the bathroom or whatever.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_01: I got engaged so young.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_01: It didn't work out.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_01: She ended up cheating on me while we lived together, which was a bummer.
• 11:59
  SPEAKER_01: But it did give me the opportunity to pack angrily, which was interesting.
• 12:04
  SPEAKER_01: You ever pack angrily?
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_01: Not your best packing work.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_01: Um I was unpacking, like, oh, I took the oven knobs?
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: That was a weird move.
• 12:14
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_01: Got backups, that's good.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 12:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you've taken a new lover?
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I took the microwave door.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_01: Who wins?
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_01: I took the paper towels.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_01: That's true.
• 12:31
  SPEAKER_01: I took a half a roll of paper towels.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: That's what you I I left my laptop and I took my paper towels.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_01: I was like, you're not gonna wipe up his with these.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_01: Those are mine.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_01: You get your own damn towels.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_07: I'm in my 30s and I have my first boyfriend ever.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_07: That's a big deal.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_07: That's a big deal.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_07: My mom's super excited about it.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_07: She calls me every day, and she's all, do you still have a boyfriend?
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_07: Do you still have a boyfriend?
• 13:04
  SPEAKER_07: And I'm like, yes, he's still my boyfriend.
• 13:07
  SPEAKER_07: We're still good.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_07: And her second question is always, are you pregnant yet?
• 13:13
  SPEAKER_07: Are you pregnant yet?
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_07: You're not?
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_07: Well, um, maybe you need to go get checked because um I read an article that women who eat a lot of chicken nuggets, um they can't have babies anymore because of the chicken nuggets.
• 13:37
  SPEAKER_07: No, seriously, truly, um scientists have scientifically studied and they found that the chicken nuggets um mess up down there real bad.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_07: And well, you know, I don't want to name names, but you eat a lot of chicken nuggets.
• 14:05
  SPEAKER_07: I'm like, yeah, these are facts.
• 14:11
  SPEAKER_07: But then I thought about it, and if it is true, and chicken nuggets do prevent pregnancy, that's awesome.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_07: Right?
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_07: Right?
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_07: Then I could just pick up a twenty piece for the month.
• 14:32
  SPEAKER_07: You know what I mean?
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_07: Pop a nug every day.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_07: If you skip a day, two nugs the next day.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_07: What?
• 14:47
  SPEAKER_07: I'm already eating chicken nuggets all the time.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_07: Now I'm preventing pregnancy too, you know, simultaneously.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_07: It's awesome.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_07: It's awesome.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_07: And and you bet your ass you still gotta dip them because that's what activates it.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_07: The barbecue and the honey mustard.
• 15:12
  SPEAKER_07: Make the babies not grow.
• 15:17
  SPEAKER_07: My boyfriend's like, uh, should I wear a condom?
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_07: And I'm like, nah, man.
• 15:27
  SPEAKER_07: I ate double the chicken nuggets this month.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_07: Let 'em fly.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_05: I'm bad at sex.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_05: So remove to you, though.
• 15:40
  SPEAKER_05: That's how being good at stuff works.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_05: For everyone, LeBron James, there's a hundred of this guy.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_05: No disrespect, sir.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_05: I just don't think you can bang in the post like that.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_05: I get annoyed.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_05: Everybody hypes up sex.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_05: I think that we should glorify our other qualities.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_05: I have other great qualities.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_05: I'm an incredible friend.
• 16:03
  SPEAKER_05: How come that never comes up when I have my dick in my hand?
• 16:12
  SPEAKER_05: It's not the in and out of sex.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_05: I'm bad at it, I understand that.
• 16:15
  SPEAKER_05: It's a pretty simple move.
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_05: My issue with six is that I'm I'm bad at multitasking.
• 16:21
  SPEAKER_05: I'm not a good multitasker.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_05: That's not the way that God made me.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_05: Like I was having sex with a woman, she was real, and uh having sex with her, and she wanted me to talk dirty.
• 16:34
  SPEAKER_05: She was like, talk dirty to me.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_05: And I was like, no.
• 16:38
  SPEAKER_05: We've been talking all night.
• 16:40
  SPEAKER_05: I was so good at talking, you let me have sex with you.
• 16:44
  SPEAKER_05: Can I shut the f up for 15 minutes?
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_05: 10 minutes, five minutes, don't joke.
• 16:56
  SPEAKER_05: She made me keep going though.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_05: She was like, just say something, say something mean, be mean.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_05: And I was like, I don't want to, and she was like, be mean, and I was like, okay, it smells in here.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_05: I think that your cat is sick and that we should have gone to my apartment.
• 17:15
  SPEAKER_05: She didn't take that though, she didn't take it.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_05: Can you believe that she wouldn't take it?
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_05: She was like, just be loose, be free, just say whatever's crossing your mind.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_05: I'm like, I'm a weird guy, you don't want that.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_05: And she was like, just do whatever.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_05: So I did, and I yelled, uh, hold the flax back, mama.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_05: I'm trying to get wiggly.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_05: So you know we're getting married.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_03: There's too many humans in New York.
• 17:49
  SPEAKER_03: There's too many humans.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_03: Eight and a half million people living three hundred square miles.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_03: If you break that down, that's twenty-seven thousand people per mile.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_03: How do you live?
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_03: Whose idea was this?
• 18:12
  SPEAKER_03: Y'all just strapped two islands together with some bridges and was like, oh, y'all got to see this now.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_03: And God forbid one of these Yankees finds out I'm not from New York.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, you're not from New York.
• 18:29
  SPEAKER_03: They all sound like witches to me.
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_03: You're not from New York.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_03: What do you mean you're not from New York?
• 18:36
  SPEAKER_03: No, through the grace of God, I was not born here.
• 18:38
  SPEAKER_03: Thank you.
• 18:42
  SPEAKER_03: Where are you from?
• 18:44
  SPEAKER_03: Atlanta, you're welcome.
• 18:46
  SPEAKER_03: Like, oh, you must be so glad to be in New York.
• 18:49
  SPEAKER_03: The South is so racist.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_03: The South is so racist.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_03: Oh.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_03: You mean the part of the South that starts in Canada and ends at Mexico?
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_03: Right, a part of America that's not racist.
• 19:08
  SPEAKER_03: I moved today.
• 19:10
  SPEAKER_03: I wait.
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_03: I know the north is more racist because in the north they split up white folks.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_03: They got Italian neighborhoods, Irish neighborhoods.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_03: I live in a Greek neighborhood.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_03: You know what Irish and Italian and Greek is in the South?
• 19:29
  SPEAKER_03: White! Nobody has time to break down your brand of whiteness, okay?
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_03: I don't care what flag your Caucasian flies under Brandon.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_04: Go vote and sit the hell down.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_04: What do you want from me?
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_04: I'll tell you what is not uh flirting, and that is that is cat calling.
• 19:54
  SPEAKER_04: This is a message.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_04: Alright.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_04: It happened to me recently because I am adorable.
• 20:03
  SPEAKER_04: And um, you know, so I I'm walking, walking down the street, and this dude, he's just like, hey.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_04: He's like, where are you going?
• 20:15
  SPEAKER_04: And I was very frustrated because again, adorable.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_04: And so I just turned around and I was like, home.
• 20:23
  SPEAKER_04: I'm just going home.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_04: And he just kind of looked me up and down and he was like, home.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, well, um, be safe.
• 20:35
  SPEAKER_04: And I was like, what the f like who wrote that cat caller?
• 20:39
  SPEAKER_04: You M.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_04: Night Shyamalan, like that was a twist ending.
• 20:43
  SPEAKER_04: Like, my titties were out.
• 20:45
  SPEAKER_04: What are you doing?
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_04: Like, did you just respect me?
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_04: Like, what?
• 20:49
  SPEAKER_04: That is not how this was supposed to end.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_02: I feel like teachers are celebrities, but we don't treat them as such.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_02: They are.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_02: We like them.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_02: They are.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_02: We don't treat them as such.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_02: Celebrities.
• 21:03
  SPEAKER_02: They molded our lives.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_02: That's why we sit in these seats today, man.
• 21:07
  SPEAKER_02: We know our first grade teacher, uh, we remember our kindergarten teacher.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_02: We remember them.
• 21:11
  SPEAKER_02: You know how they celebrities, you remember you was little, you see your teacher out in public, you freak out.
• 21:16
  SPEAKER_02: You like, Mr.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_02: Burner, what you doing out here with short tour?
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_02: Why you got your ankles out?
• 21:23
  SPEAKER_02: What the f you doing?
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_02: Oh, I'm just going to the beach.
• 21:28
  SPEAKER_02: No, you live in school.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_02: I ain't never seen y'all stop.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_02: What you doing outside?
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_02: Never thought they had their own life.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_02: When I was little, man, I thought my teacher at the end of the day just go back into the cubby and recharge.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_02: All right, it's 8:30.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_02: How you doing, Class?
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_02: Oh I knew he was back there!
• 22:02
  SPEAKER_00: He never leaves!
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_10: I I do I love like learning like about sciences, learning about tech, stuff like that.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_10: Um one of my favorite things to do is to research which animals are gay.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_10: Um giraffes bias something about the neck, we don't know.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_10: But there's not that much research done about which bugs are gay, right?
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_10: And I've looked it up, I've done some of my own, and they said that sometimes like two male bugs will like mistake each other for a female and like accidentally have sex.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_10: And it's like, okay, I went to college.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_10: Um so I made a slide that's a very comprehensive list of which bugs are gay or not, so let's go.
• 22:44
  SPEAKER_10: Um dragonflies, the fact that dragonflies will just like hover in air perfectly still like that, not moving, gay.
• 22:53
  SPEAKER_10: That requires classical training, you know?
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_10: Like they went to drama school.
• 22:58
  SPEAKER_10: Ladybugs, every ladybug is a lesbian.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_10: Honestly.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_10: Look, they got this bold lipstick right here, but if if you zoom in, there's birkin stocks on every one of these.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_10: Uh Beatles, lesbians, that's a strap.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_10: Um bees, the fact that you're so willing to hurt someone that you would die for it, that's gay.
• 23:32
  SPEAKER_10: Like the pettiness that that takes.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_10: Very gay.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_10: And they worship a queen, like, come on, you know.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_10: Wasp, wasp are straight.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_10: It's a visual feeling.
• 23:48
  SPEAKER_10: I don't need to explain it.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_10: We all get it.
• 23:50
  SPEAKER_10: And look at that interior design, you know, like it's just not up to par.
• 23:55
  SPEAKER_10: Butterflies, gay.
• 23:57
  SPEAKER_10: I mean, come on.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_10: You know, they go in the cocoon college, they pop out, they start thotting, you know.
• 24:01
  SPEAKER_10: It is classic, queer narrative.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_10: Um, cicadas, the fact that they just like take off their clothes and leave it anywhere, that's straight.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_10: You know, it's like pick up after yourself, cicadas.
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_10: Gay! Every fragment is as gay as f look.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_10: Like Yaz.
• 24:23
  SPEAKER_10: Let's get these aphids.
• 24:28
  SPEAKER_10: Scorpions, are they insects?
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_10: Are they spiders?
• 24:31
  SPEAKER_10: Neither, they're bi.
• 24:32
  SPEAKER_10: Um cockroaches are gay because they're everywhere and you'll never get rid of them.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_10: Um with ants, it's like you're working so hard.
• 24:45
  SPEAKER_10: What are you hiding?
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_10: I just think ants need to do some soul searching.
• 24:59
  SPEAKER_10: And Zaddy Long Leg's gay.
• 25:03
  SPEAKER_10: And that is a complete list of all the bugs that are gay.
• 25:09
  SPEAKER_10: I know because I them all.