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"I'm In Love With My Best Friend": DIABOLICAL Dating Dilemmas · Two Broke Chicks

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This podcast is recorded on gaddigal Land Always was, always
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: will be Aboriginal Land. Hey cheeks, I'm sal and I'm
• 0:12
  Speaker 1: this is too broke chicks to show that sheares. And
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: we're sitting in slightly different seats today, which kind of
• 0:21
  Speaker 1: feels weird because today we are joined by Jake and
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: ODDI from the Relatables podcast.
• 0:27
  Speaker 2: Welcome guys, Hello, good to be here. Thank you for
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: having us.
• 0:31
  Speaker 3: I'm so excited to have you on because, as some
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: of you chicks may have seen, we're doing a Diabolical
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: dating Dilemmas episode where you chicks sent in your dilemmas
• 0:40
  Speaker 3: and we thought we need a male perspective, called them
• 0:43
  Speaker 3: the big Guns.
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll do our best.
• 0:46
  Speaker 4: It's a lot of pressure.
• 0:48
  Speaker 5: I feel like there is pressure like being on someone
• 0:50
  Speaker 5: else's pod when we're doing out things so different.
• 0:53
  Speaker 3: Before we get into our dilemmas, we like to start
• 0:56
  Speaker 3: with a life lesson of the week and it can
• 0:58
  Speaker 3: be silly, serious, whatever you like anywhere in between.
• 1:02
  Speaker 4: Can we take probiotics and BALI if.
• 1:04
  Speaker 5: You want it to meet That's kind of like hindsight
• 1:07
  Speaker 5: for me.
• 1:08
  Speaker 6: Would you like to kick us off.
• 1:10
  Speaker 5: Lesson of the Week? I reckon. It is just take
• 1:13
  Speaker 5: things slowly. I move way too quickly, and especially the
• 1:18
  Speaker 5: time of year we're at, and I just take a
• 1:20
  Speaker 5: second to appreciate what you're doing and live in the moment.
• 1:23
  Speaker 6: Ah, that's just a nice one.
• 1:24
  Speaker 2: I like it, I'm going to say, because that was
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: like pretty good.
• 1:30
  Speaker 7: Damn go.
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: Off kilter or different. If you're thinking about putting your washing,
• 1:39
  Speaker 2: don't think about doing it, do it.
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: Okay, that was a personal attack.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: I do it myself always. Yeah.
• 1:46
  Speaker 4: Do you know what that is?
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: It's whenever there's something on your to do list and
• 1:50
  Speaker 3: it takes less than five minutes, do it as soon
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: as you think about it.
• 1:53
  Speaker 4: Don't be like, oh yeah, i'll do that later.
• 1:55
  Speaker 3: I'll do that later, because then all of those things
• 1:57
  Speaker 3: add up and then take forty five minute it's to
• 2:00
  Speaker 3: do all together, and then you're like, fuck, I've got
• 2:02
  Speaker 3: no undies, swear.
• 2:04
  Speaker 4: I have a pile of washing in my room at
• 2:06
  Speaker 4: the moment.
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: That's probably the size of this coffee table, and I'm
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: just like looking away from it, just all of it.
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: When I get dressed, I just go through the pile
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, yes, good. And my boyfriend today was
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: like if you deal with this this afternoon, I'll buy
• 2:25
  Speaker 1: you something on the weekend. I was like, perfect, it's
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: been sitting there for like five days.
• 2:31
  Speaker 4: My babies, my friend has been really busy, and he's like,
• 2:33
  Speaker 4: it's okay, don't worry, and I'm like, it's gonna start
• 2:36
  Speaker 4: talking soon.
• 2:40
  Speaker 1: Like you know, there's like those kids movies where like
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: the yeah, I'm gonna.
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: Start growing something.
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: A disease with like some sort of like new antibiotic
• 2:50
  Speaker 1: penicillin growing in there. That's not that dirty, I swear,
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: but I really need to do my washing.
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: So yeah, that's a good one. We relate to that clearly.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: What's your life lesson?
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: Okay, my life lesson of the week is that Glee
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: needs to come back. Maybe not necessarily like the problematic storylines,
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: but there was a cover that came up on my
• 3:10
  Speaker 1: TikTok that literally rewired my brain chemistry. Have you guys
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: seen Wicket Part one? Have you heard any of the songs? Okay,
• 3:22
  Speaker 1: it doesn't really matter because the song is still a bop,
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: but this is a cover of Defying Gravity that is
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: probably going to be my number one Spotify wrapped, and
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I'm acknowledging that even though we're in November.
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, spam it.
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've literally listened to it four times to day.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: The song finishes and I go another one, like literally.
• 3:49
  Speaker 8: Literally Okay, it's a little line typical particularly.
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: More comment.
• 4:07
  Speaker 9: That's because they didn't cover could have said pitch perfect.
• 4:19
  Speaker 7: I love this. Okay, that is amazing.
• 4:33
  Speaker 2: I love people that right.
• 4:36
  Speaker 3: Well, so.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: I think you put headphones on and put it all
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: the way up I could see.
• 4:42
  Speaker 4: Because I can't hear.
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: We've tried before. Oh yeah, so we oh yeah, we
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: have a couple of songs there. But we've tried on
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: the podcast, like actually putting effort into when it comes
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: out of If I'm doing it while it's coming out,
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: I think it.
• 4:56
  Speaker 4: Sounds good and then you listen back. Didn't we all
• 4:59
  Speaker 4: do that?
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: We were like seven years old and we had like
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: the recording feature on our Nokia and we were like, yeah,
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: this is going to hit and then you listen back
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: and you just quietly delete it and.
• 5:08
  Speaker 3: You'll let my mind a little microphone that I could
• 5:11
  Speaker 3: plug into my radio, and I did it with Let's
• 5:14
  Speaker 3: Get Loud by Jennifer Lopez. It's a hard song, sore,
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: I know, like clearly it's and I really thought like
• 5:20
  Speaker 3: I killed it, and then I listened back and it
• 5:23
  Speaker 3: was like.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: That's like every video of us in karaoke. I'm like,
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: fucking crushed it. Then I watched a video back. I'm like,
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: don't ever let that see.
• 5:30
  Speaker 4: The light of day. And we were like, how sweaty
• 5:32
  Speaker 4: was I?
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: Anyway, that's my life lesson.
• 5:36
  Speaker 4: We need to bring Glee covers back. Okay, yeah, not
• 5:42
  Speaker 4: pitch perfect. I like to hit that home. No fucking
• 5:46
  Speaker 4: what's it called a cappella?
• 5:47
  Speaker 9: Yeah?
• 5:48
  Speaker 7: A cappella is my biggest X of all time.
• 5:51
  Speaker 4: I hate it all right.
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: My life lesson of the week is actually a study
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: that I saw and apparently our adolescence lasts into our thirties.
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah. I'll take that and run with it.
• 6:04
  Speaker 3: That's exactly what I was sinking, because I was like,
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: you know, how well I was gonna say this to you,
• 6:09
  Speaker 3: but maybe you guys don't feel like this now we
• 6:11
  Speaker 3: say that I'm just a thirty year old teenage girl. Yeah, well,
• 6:15
  Speaker 3: I'm like, that actually makes sense. So in this new study,
• 6:18
  Speaker 3: they found that the brain goes through five distinct phases
• 6:21
  Speaker 3: in life, with key turning points at ages nine thirty two,
• 6:26
  Speaker 3: sixty six, and eighty three, and the brain is constantly
• 6:30
  Speaker 3: changing in response to new knowledge and experience. But the
• 6:34
  Speaker 3: research shows that it isn't like one smooth pattern from.
• 6:37
  Speaker 6: Birth to death. So that clocks over at thirty two.
• 6:40
  Speaker 3: Yeah, the adolescence period is from age nine to thirty two,
• 6:44
  Speaker 3: and this phase is the brain's only period when it's
• 6:48
  Speaker 3: network of neurons gets more efficient, and that's when we peak.
• 6:52
  Speaker 3: So from thirty two to sixty six, this is the
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: brain's like longest period of stability, but it is when
• 7:00
  Speaker 3: we start to see some of those declines.
• 7:02
  Speaker 4: So basically it's all downhill after thirty two.
• 7:04
  Speaker 7: Yeah.
• 7:04
  Speaker 4: Cool, great life lessons out. Thanks for that one.
• 7:07
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah, But also I wanted for any of the chicks
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: who are still in their twenties and you feel like
• 7:13
  Speaker 3: a teenage girl.
• 7:14
  Speaker 7: Maybe that's why.
• 7:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, or if the guy you're dating, yeah, age boy.
• 7:19
  Speaker 6: Okay, we'll speaking. Oh, should we get into our dilemmas?
• 7:21
  Speaker 6: Get it?
• 7:22
  Speaker 3: Okay, We've got a few different dilemmas sent in by
• 7:25
  Speaker 3: the chicks and I'll read them out and then we
• 7:28
  Speaker 3: can all like throw our two cents in. Should you
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: date your friends? So there's this boy that I've liked
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: for a couple of months now. Let's call him Reese.
• 7:37
  Speaker 3: We're in a band together, with him on the keyboard
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: and me alternating between singing and playing the drum.
• 7:42
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, it's Staisy Jones and the seats.
• 7:44
  Speaker 3: Yeah, and I love that she's like multi talented. We
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: text every day, multiple times a day, and it honestly
• 7:50
  Speaker 3: feels really flirty from both sides. Also, he's really caring
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: and funny and smart. And yeah, I've been working up
• 7:57
  Speaker 3: the courage, Dad, Yeah, I've been working up the courage
• 8:01
  Speaker 3: to ask Reese out for weeks now, until he texted
• 8:04
  Speaker 3: me a few days ago to tell me he lacks
• 8:06
  Speaker 3: another girl.
• 8:07
  Speaker 6: Let's call her Angie.
• 8:09
  Speaker 3: To prefers, I'm friends with her, and she's an Angie.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: There's always an Angie to preface. I'm friends with her
• 8:17
  Speaker 3: and she's absolutely amazing. However, Reese and Angie have never
• 8:21
  Speaker 3: talked and honestly don't even know each other. Reese has
• 8:24
  Speaker 3: asked me to play wing woman because he knows I'm
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: friends with her, But what he doesn't know is that
• 8:30
  Speaker 3: Angie already knows I like him, and she also likes
• 8:33
  Speaker 3: someone else. So there's virtually no chance of them ever
• 8:36
  Speaker 3: dating because she wouldn't do that to me, and honestly,
• 8:39
  Speaker 3: he's just not her type. I really value my friendship
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: with Reese because he makes me feel safe enough to
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: talk about the things that keep me up at night,
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: and he feels the same about me, but also because
• 8:49
  Speaker 3: our personalities and humor line up so well, which is
• 8:52
  Speaker 3: why I like him so much.
• 8:53
  Speaker 6: Oh my god, I got a Oh my god, I'm
• 8:57
  Speaker 6: not a bad bye usher.
• 8:59
  Speaker 3: I want him to be happy, but also I don't
• 9:01
  Speaker 3: want to lead him on, considering a relationship with Angie
• 9:04
  Speaker 3: is not likely to happen. I also feel like if
• 9:06
  Speaker 3: I did tell him, I would have to explain my
• 9:08
  Speaker 3: own feelings to him, even though I know he doesn't
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: feel the same, and I'm really scared that I'm going
• 9:14
  Speaker 3: to ruin the friendship. I really need some help here
• 9:17
  Speaker 3: because I have absolutely no idea what to do in
• 9:19
  Speaker 3: this situation.
• 9:20
  Speaker 6: Should I tell him the truth?
• 9:23
  Speaker 4: This is such a good one.
• 9:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I literally feel like this was like ripped from
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: some like BookTalk right romance?
• 9:30
  Speaker 4: Yeah, let's break down the characters. Did she share her name?
• 9:34
  Speaker 6: No?
• 9:35
  Speaker 4: Lily? Okay, so we've got Lily and.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: Then Lily likes Reese, but Reese likes Angie, but Angie
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: likes Billy.
• 9:46
  Speaker 4: And Angie knows that Angie knows that Lily likes.
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: Reese, and that Reese likes Angie.
• 9:53
  Speaker 5: Well, Lily said she doesn't want to ruin the friendship.
• 9:55
  Speaker 5: There isn't really a friendship there because she likes him
• 9:58
  Speaker 5: already friends with someone.
• 10:01
  Speaker 4: He's not your friend, he's your crush.
• 10:02
  Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly, and like that's already gone because he's view
• 10:04
  Speaker 5: him in a different light to me.
• 10:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's such a good point because as well, like
• 10:09
  Speaker 1: when she's talking to him, she's not really talking to
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: him as a friend.
• 10:12
  Speaker 5: She's like, I want to kiss him.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you slide down.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: I guess, Like how important is this band to her?
• 10:23
  Speaker 4: The next Weetwood Mac or not you prefer.
• 10:25
  Speaker 2: To like, you know, yes, bottle it up and watch
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: him end up dating someone else and then still stay
• 10:31
  Speaker 2: in the same band. And yeah, I guess you just
• 10:33
  Speaker 2: have to look at it as like, go for it,
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: but you actually be willing to lose the band and
• 10:36
  Speaker 2: lose a friend.
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: Do you think there's a universe where she can tell
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: him And he's like, I'm so sorry, I don't feel
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: the same way and the friendship can continue.
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: There is a universe out there. I just don't know if.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: It's really Have either of you ever experienced this.
• 10:55
  Speaker 6: From either side?
• 10:59
  Speaker 2: Okay, well we like.
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: To say too it seems harsh, but don't ship where
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: you eat. That's like what we look by. And like
• 11:07
  Speaker 5: Jake said, if you don't care about the band, go
• 11:09
  Speaker 5: for it, get closure if you're wrong. But I think
• 11:11
  Speaker 5: I don't know. If the band means that much to
• 11:13
  Speaker 5: you and your friendship, probably just leave it and I
• 11:15
  Speaker 5: don't know, look into different interests.
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, either way, I feel like the band has to
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: be kind of gone because you're tortured if you don't
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: do anything about it.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: But could get good material, true, make a really good song.
• 11:28
  Speaker 4: Let's bring it back?
• 11:30
  Speaker 5: Or is it like looking to be a job?
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: I think if you're exactly what you're saying, if you're
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: really serious about the band, you might just have to
• 11:37
  Speaker 1: like put it aside. But when you really like someone,
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: that's you need to like go and find someone else
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: to like. You need to find a new crush and
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: like as safe as this person makes you feel, if
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: you're not going to act on it because you're like, no,
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: the band's my priority. Stop texting him to like help
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: you with that.
• 11:58
  Speaker 3: That sort of dope for me and from him him,
• 12:00
  Speaker 3: even though he doesn't realize he's given.
• 12:02
  Speaker 4: Is it bad that I still kind of wanted to
• 12:03
  Speaker 4: tell him. I kind of wanted to tell him.
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: I agree with you.
• 12:08
  Speaker 1: I also agree with the don't shoot where you eat.
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: I say, don't fuck your colleagues, your like roommates, or
• 12:14
  Speaker 1: your friends, or even people that live in the same
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: building as you.
• 12:17
  Speaker 6: That's a no go.
• 12:18
  Speaker 4: Yeah, a couple of floors, Yeah, I've done that. Don't
• 12:22
  Speaker 4: do it. It's really awkward.
• 12:25
  Speaker 5: How many floors we're talking?
• 12:26
  Speaker 8: Yeah, Yeah, it's really great.
• 12:32
  Speaker 4: When you get in the lift and you're like, I
• 12:37
  Speaker 4: look fucking ugly.
• 12:40
  Speaker 2: When you look good, that's worse.
• 12:42
  Speaker 4: I'm like, don't look for you anymore.
• 12:45
  Speaker 8: Yeah.
• 12:47
  Speaker 2: Have you guys been in this type of situation?
• 12:50
  Speaker 4: I'm not a friends to lover his pun.
• 12:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah, And it didn't end well. And this is like
• 12:56
  Speaker 3: a high school thing, so it's you know, steakes are
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: very very low at this point.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: But I think I know one girl I do that
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: has done like a well. Friends we were all in
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: a friendship group and then they got together and I
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: think the I swear they're like the only couple that
• 13:12
  Speaker 1: comes to mind that I'm like that actually worked out,
• 13:14
  Speaker 1: so like it can happen, but the odds are not
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: ever in your think.
• 13:19
  Speaker 5: You should think about the other people in the band.
• 13:22
  Speaker 4: True, what the.
• 13:33
  Speaker 5: People like, Literally, Daisy Jones and the six ye fine
• 13:37
  Speaker 5: fall in love? They don't, and then everyone's like, this
• 13:39
  Speaker 5: is so awkward, but put face.
• 13:42
  Speaker 6: Yeah, everyone else is collateral damage.
• 13:44
  Speaker 2: Literally.
• 13:45
  Speaker 4: I think she should tell Angie.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: I think she should go to her friend and be like, look,
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: he's mentioned this to me because it's her friend. Her
• 13:54
  Speaker 1: friend knows that she likes him, so she would be like,
• 13:57
  Speaker 1: what do I do? And then obviously she knows that
• 13:59
  Speaker 1: her friend like some now, so then Angie might be like,
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: I'll tell him that I'm not.
• 14:02
  Speaker 4: Keen, and then potentially she can shoot her shot. But
• 14:06
  Speaker 4: it depends, like what you're saying, if there.
• 14:07
  Speaker 2: Be just tell his own shot.
• 14:13
  Speaker 6: Yeah, that's a bit of an air.
• 14:16
  Speaker 4: Okay, new dilemma. Oh, this is a good one. This
• 14:19
  Speaker 4: is a good one for your opinion. Okay, do you
• 14:21
  Speaker 4: guys have siblings? What do you have?
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: I got one older, four younger, holy divorced parents and stepparents.
• 14:32
  Speaker 6: Okay, brothers, sisters, everything?
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 14:35
  Speaker 6: Okay, all right? Did I read this one? Is that one?
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 14:39
  Speaker 6: Okay?
• 14:39
  Speaker 2: Okay?
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Can I date my brother's friend? A few years ago,
• 14:53
  Speaker 3: I was out one night in my hometown with some friends.
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: I started talking to this guy. We clicked straight away
• 14:58
  Speaker 3: and got on really well as an I went on
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: and after quite a few drinks, he asked if I
• 15:02
  Speaker 3: wanted to go back to his place. I said yes,
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: and I ended up spending the night with him. We
• 15:06
  Speaker 3: swapped socials and kept chatting afterwards. Then one day I
• 15:09
  Speaker 3: got a message from him saying, hey, your last name
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: sounds familiar. I didn't think much of it at first
• 15:15
  Speaker 3: because my last name is pretty common, but then he
• 15:18
  Speaker 3: sent another message asking is your brother dot dot dot
• 15:22
  Speaker 3: my brother's name. He then sent a picture of him
• 15:24
  Speaker 3: and my brother playing rugby together. My stomach dropped. I
• 15:28
  Speaker 3: got hit with instant anxiety. He followed up by saying
• 15:31
  Speaker 3: he knew my brother because they played rugby together. That's
• 15:34
  Speaker 3: when I completely panicked and just stopped talking to him
• 15:37
  Speaker 3: all together and have never seen him since. As I
• 15:41
  Speaker 3: have been avoiding going out in my hometown.
• 15:43
  Speaker 6: Should I have ghosted him?
• 15:45
  Speaker 3: Oh, so she ghosted him, but does she like him?
• 15:50
  Speaker 6: It sounds like it.
• 15:51
  Speaker 4: It sounds but she was okay, she's like avoiding it
• 15:54
  Speaker 4: because she likes him, but she wants to message him.
• 15:58
  Speaker 4: But she's like, can I date my brother's friend?
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: So you had an answer to this before we even
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: read out.
• 16:03
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, go, you know what you're gonna say.
• 16:04
  Speaker 5: It brings up a great argument in a sense of no,
• 16:07
  Speaker 5: you shouldn't. But also the argument is, say Jake, for example,
• 16:11
  Speaker 5: he was single and I had a sister. No better
• 16:14
  Speaker 5: person to date my sister. But also it's weird. Yeah,
• 16:18
  Speaker 5: and if it doesn't work out, it's like, well, this
• 16:21
  Speaker 5: is just awkward now. So it's kind of like what
• 16:23
  Speaker 5: I his intentions? And because it started from a one
• 16:25
  Speaker 5: night stand no and rugby, Rugby's a weird vibe in
• 16:28
  Speaker 5: a sense of they're probably not that good mates, but
• 16:29
  Speaker 5: they're just like, I don't know, acquaintances.
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that could be all the more reason to go
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: forward if they're just acquainted.
• 16:35
  Speaker 5: But talk to your brother first. I reckon and see
• 16:37
  Speaker 5: how close you are.
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: I think they are acquaintance, but do you reckon?
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: Her brother's gonna go like you like in the team yeah, things.
• 16:45
  Speaker 2: That you never know what I can tell you right now.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: I happened to usk. We'd probably just be if one
• 16:54
  Speaker 2: of our friends of my sister. I wouldn't get mad,
• 16:58
  Speaker 2: but I would just be like what I would be,
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: But I wouldn't get mad. Yeah, I'd be mad at
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: both of them. I'd be like, what do you guys doing?
• 17:05
  Speaker 1: Dishonor on you dish on your calk?
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: What are you guys doing?
• 17:09
  Speaker 5: What the comms like beforehand? I feel like you get
• 17:11
  Speaker 5: there last name like, yeah, she said, the.
• 17:14
  Speaker 6: Last name is common comment. Yeahs.
• 17:18
  Speaker 4: Also they met on a night out.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: I'm not there being like and how do you spell that?
• 17:22
  Speaker 2: Socials the next day?
• 17:24
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.
• 17:28
  Speaker 4: I wish we had more details of that.
• 17:29
  Speaker 6: Looks good.
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: I kind of think that made the right decision. Yeah,
• 17:34
  Speaker 2: everything you don't know. You know, the sex could have
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: been great. Yes, I had great conversations on that particular
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: night out. Yes, but you actually don't know him. You know,
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: it's like you could have a little crush. Everyone has
• 17:45
  Speaker 2: like a little crush on the people they sleep with
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: because it's like an intimate moment. But you know, if
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: it doesn't happen again, you're not Yeah, this could easily
• 17:54
  Speaker 2: be this isn't the one that got away.
• 17:55
  Speaker 6: Do you think that she should have sent I love that.
• 17:58
  Speaker 3: Do you think that she should have sent a message
• 17:59
  Speaker 3: just like, hey, you're in my brother's rugby team. I
• 18:03
  Speaker 3: think he would be weird about it, so like, let's
• 18:05
  Speaker 3: wrap it up here, or do you think it's okay
• 18:07
  Speaker 3: that she just goes to him?
• 18:08
  Speaker 2: Well, that would have been the most mature thing to do.
• 18:11
  Speaker 2: But at the same time, the same message, Yeah, the
• 18:15
  Speaker 2: exact same message.
• 18:17
  Speaker 5: I don't think she doesn't know him anything in a
• 18:19
  Speaker 5: sense of it was a one night stand. Yeah, like
• 18:21
  Speaker 5: you can do whatever you want.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: It sounds like he kind of had a bit of
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: a panic too as well, being like are you do
• 18:33
  Speaker 1: it again?
• 18:36
  Speaker 4: I'm like, when it's one am you message him.
• 18:40
  Speaker 2: Doesn't make him hotter?
• 18:41
  Speaker 10: Yeah, if you suck him again, can you please tell
• 18:50
  Speaker 10: us feed me?
• 18:52
  Speaker 6: Because that's another thing. It's also she doesn't want to
• 18:54
  Speaker 6: go out in her hometown.
• 18:56
  Speaker 3: Yeah, New Year's this is definitely happening again.
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you know what it's now, there's tension there, now,
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: tension there, you know what's sexy tension?
• 19:09
  Speaker 4: So big one.
• 19:10
  Speaker 5: Fuck for small towns too, Like yeah, and stuff, just rugby, footy, soccer, whatever,
• 19:17
  Speaker 5: and there's not that many people.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: It's the same.
• 19:19
  Speaker 3: What is that three degrees of separation between every single person,
• 19:23
  Speaker 3: it's one degree.
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: You go out and you see the same people every
• 19:27
  Speaker 2: time you go out. It's not like. My girlfriend grew
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: up in Sydney and she said that she's very rarely
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: seen the same person.
• 19:34
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 19:34
  Speaker 2: Wow, where we live, it's every week in the same place.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: Same place, same people. Well, I want to know what
• 19:39
  Speaker 1: happens next.
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: I reckon it'll happen again.
• 19:41
  Speaker 6: I reckon judgment.
• 19:43
  Speaker 11: If it does, it's kind of hot live and then
• 19:48
  Speaker 11: like and then like they'll be kissing in like a
• 19:51
  Speaker 11: dark corner in the bar, and then her brother will
• 19:52
  Speaker 11: walk and he'll be like.
• 19:53
  Speaker 4: Get off my sea stuff. And then she'll be like, stop,
• 19:56
  Speaker 4: it's not what it looks like. And then he will
• 19:58
  Speaker 4: fight the brother and then they'll get married. Great, I've
• 20:01
  Speaker 4: already written a book to a story here. Why okay,
• 20:07
  Speaker 4: we'll do one more quick.
• 20:08
  Speaker 1: One one of my best friends was in an on again,
• 20:11
  Speaker 1: off again relationship for about a year.
• 20:13
  Speaker 4: Each time they broke up, it was because of the bloke.
• 20:16
  Speaker 4: He said a.
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: Couple times that he was still in love with his
• 20:18
  Speaker 1: ex and a couple times said that he wasn't emotionally
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: ready to be with my friend.
• 20:23
  Speaker 4: When he would then want to get back.
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: Together with my friend. He was extremely emotionally manipulative. The
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: examples of this would need a trigger warning so have
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: not shared fair, but she liked him so much she
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: would eventually take him back each time despite my advice.
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: Throughout this period, I was extremely critical of this in
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: quotes man and was naturally telling my friend to fuck
• 20:45
  Speaker 1: him off as she could do better. I even got
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: to the point of saying I refuse to ever meet
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: this guy, even if they stayed together, as I saw
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: the effect he was having on her well being and
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: it was not good. Noting there are a lot of
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: things this man has done and some behaviors that are
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: completely unacceptable, but I can't share you to the nature
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: of these behaviors and being respectful to my friend, I
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: kind of love that from her loyalty. Fast forward and
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: they have now been steady for about ten months and
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: my friend wants me to meet him. To be honest,
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: she seems extremely happy now. I told her I was
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: apprehensive about meeting him, as I've made my opinion very clear,
• 21:20
  Speaker 1: and this naturally upset her. I know she's gonna ask
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: me again soon. So do I need to suck it
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: up and put a smile on my face because she's
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: happy at the moment? Can I hold firm to my opinions?
• 21:30
  Speaker 9: Help me?
• 21:31
  Speaker 1: She's my best mate, so I never want to lose her,
• 21:34
  Speaker 1: But I also don't want to lie and pretend I'm
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: stoked that she's in love with the guy. Thoughts, feelings,
• 21:39
  Speaker 1: advice would be greatly appreciated.
• 21:41
  Speaker 5: OK, is so relatable. Yeah, you don't want to lose
• 21:45
  Speaker 5: a mate?
• 21:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: Also is it your place?
• 21:48
  Speaker 5: Yeah?
• 21:49
  Speaker 6: What would you do?
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: Have you ever hated a mate's partner? Are they still
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: with them?
• 21:57
  Speaker 6: No?
• 21:58
  Speaker 4: No, that would have been juicy.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: We've spoken about it fair a bit lately, how it's
• 22:03
  Speaker 2: it's pretty surface level or men's friendships. I feel like
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: it was the one time where our friend group had
• 22:09
  Speaker 2: like a very emotional like moment and it was an
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: unhealthy way to do it. And really, I feel really
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: bad for the friend that was dating the person that
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: everyone disliked. We all had a pretty valid reason to
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: dislike her, But at the same time, no one sat
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: him down and was like, like this friend that she's
• 22:33
  Speaker 2: very open about it, Like no one was really open
• 22:35
  Speaker 2: about it until one night, just like I guess the
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: group chat just kind of blew up and everyone just
• 22:39
  Speaker 2: went for it. And then after the fact, I think
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: it was Boddie, maybe one other person went actually had
• 22:48
  Speaker 2: dinner with him and spoke to him. But it kind
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: of from then on, I would say the friendship group
• 22:56
  Speaker 2: was a little had a bit of a rift. It
• 22:58
  Speaker 2: was never the same.
• 22:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah, it kind of like put a barrier in place
• 23:02
  Speaker 5: in the sense of he didn't think he could be
• 23:03
  Speaker 5: himself or talk to his partner around us whilst they're
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: still together. With this one though, I feel like what
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: she left out maybe alludes to the fact that she
• 23:11
  Speaker 5: shouldn't support it because we don't know the details of
• 23:14
  Speaker 5: how toxic it is, because there's a fine line between
• 23:16
  Speaker 5: someone you don't like and someone doing really bad things. Yeah,
• 23:19
  Speaker 5: and only she will know that.
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I do think on exactly on that note though,
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: sometimes though, you do have to be because for example,
• 23:30
  Speaker 1: like Saul has hated someone that I've dated, right, so
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: then I just started lying to her. So like this
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: was years and years and years ago, and that was
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: really really yuck. Like I hated doing that, and it
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: kind of built that like kind of the opposite to
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: your experience, but both extremely valid. Was by not being
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: honest with each other, we could kind of feel that
• 23:53
  Speaker 1: and be like, oh, why is this weird, little gray,
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: foggy cloud in the middle. And my experience also not
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: like emotionally abusive or anything like that.
• 24:02
  Speaker 2: It was not.
• 24:03
  Speaker 1: They just kind of sucked right, But it was like,
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: I don't want you to feel like you can't talk
• 24:08
  Speaker 1: to me about things that are hard, or you don't
• 24:11
  Speaker 1: want me to be there for you, or like like
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: I'm at the end of the day, I'm still your friend.
• 24:15
  Speaker 4: I'm still gonna be there for you if you need me.
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: And so by saying I hate him, I like don't
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: support this, you potentially not one hundred percent, but potentially
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: introduce a situation that in those moments where he is
• 24:29
  Speaker 1: being an absolute horrible person, she might not come to
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: you because she feels like she can't and she might
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: hear like I told you so well, blah blah blah.
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: I think there's a happy middle ground between the two.
• 24:39
  Speaker 1: Potentially not happy, but like middle ground.
• 24:43
  Speaker 5: You're still there to support if something.
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: Do you think it's worth that if she does ask,
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: she's like, Okay, look, I just want to say, like
• 24:52
  Speaker 3: the reason I said no before was because of X
• 24:55
  Speaker 3: y Z. However, I am so happy for you and
• 24:58
  Speaker 3: genuinely want this relationship to work and want you to
• 25:01
  Speaker 3: be happy. So I will do this, but like, please
• 25:05
  Speaker 3: know that, like like maybe my.
• 25:07
  Speaker 6: Feelings haven't changed or I do. I'll be going into.
• 25:09
  Speaker 3: It with some reservations and I just want to be
• 25:11
  Speaker 3: open and honest, but I will do my best life.
• 25:14
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I think that's the best thing to do.
• 25:16
  Speaker 4: Can you meet him in a group?
• 25:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 25:18
  Speaker 4: Can you meet him in a group atmosphere?
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: How many chances do you give?
• 25:23
  Speaker 6: Like, well, she's never met this guy?
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah. The other thing, so with the friend, you don't
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: want to lose the friend. Yeah, there's some pretty bad manipulation,
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: like emotional manipulation going into it. So you don't want
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: to let make it known, like you don't want her
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: to feel alone. But at the same time, I'm lucky
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: I've never actually been in like this exact situation. But like,
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: how many times can you see your friend get so
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: hurt and go back to the same person. That's I
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: guess up to the individual of how many times you
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: can witness it. I have no idea. I'd have no
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: judgment if you stayed forever or you did cut around.
• 25:58
  Speaker 2: I have no judgment either way. Yeah, and wanting to
• 26:00
  Speaker 2: be there for and stuff. But that's you know where
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: my question.
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: I have a friend like this, But I was like,
• 26:05
  Speaker 1: I really hated her boyfriend. You know, I was always
• 26:09
  Speaker 1: there if something bad happened, like if she wanted to
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: rant about something.
• 26:12
  Speaker 4: But then one time we had.
• 26:13
  Speaker 1: A fight because we were sitting on the couch and
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: she was telling me about some really like cute thing
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: he did, and I kind of was like, it was like, yeah,
• 26:21
  Speaker 1: give us nothing, Like I was like, okay, cool, yeah,
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: and then she was like, well, you don't want to
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: talk about it.
• 26:26
  Speaker 4: I was like, I've told you I don't support like
• 26:29
  Speaker 4: him that.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm happy you're happy and all of that,
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: but I don't necessarily support this relationship due to these behaviors.
• 26:37
  Speaker 4: But I'm always here for you, and that's like And
• 26:39
  Speaker 4: we ended up having a row about it.
• 26:41
  Speaker 1: But then after that, like she was like, okay, fine,
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: and guess what they broke up exactly. So if not
• 26:50
  Speaker 1: you have that guiding line, what's meant to be, will
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: be and hopefully as well.
• 26:53
  Speaker 4: You can lead a horse to water, but you can't
• 26:55
  Speaker 4: make it drink. There's only so much you can do
• 26:57
  Speaker 4: for your friends.
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: And like wearing that and a responsibility will also put
• 27:01
  Speaker 1: a massive drain in your relationship.
• 27:04
  Speaker 4: So at the end of the day, dump him.
• 27:07
  Speaker 3: Honestly, communication is key. I think we've learned from literally
• 27:11
  Speaker 3: all of these examples. However, you can take that into
• 27:15
  Speaker 3: this scenario.
• 27:15
  Speaker 6: But thank you guys.
• 27:17
  Speaker 7: So much for care for having it.
• 27:20
  Speaker 3: Like genuinely incredible advice, and I'm so glad that we
• 27:25
  Speaker 3: were able to have you on if you guys do
• 27:26
  Speaker 3: a lot of dos and you have an incredible podcast yourself.
• 27:29
  Speaker 6: So for any of the chicks, where can they find
• 27:31
  Speaker 6: you both?
• 27:33
  Speaker 5: Just relatables on Spotify, instant and TikTok. Simple as that.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: Thank you very much.
• 27:38
  Speaker 4: Thank you so much for joining us. We had so
• 27:40
  Speaker 4: much fun. I want to talk forever.
• 27:41
  Speaker 2: We have to get you on ours, Yeah, let's do it.
• 27:46
  Speaker 4: Okay, Well, thank you chicks for having us in your
• 27:47
  Speaker 4: ear Hurles.
• 27:48
  Speaker 6: We love to be here, Love your chicks.
• 27:51
  Speaker 4: Bye bye.