Latest / Jess Ask / You’re Not Being Overlooked… You’re Being Positioned | FT LaDarrius Hutcherson | EP153

Transcript

You’re Not Being Overlooked… You’re Being Positioned | FT LaDarrius Hutcherson | EP153 · Jess Ask

• 0:07
  Speaker 1: Yo, it's your girl, Jessica and Smith and you already
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: know that you've entered the safe space for influencers to decompress,
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: have fun and just ask God.
• 0:17
  Speaker 2: For another Do you already know what it is? And
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: then you know it's about to get real.
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: To be sure to show your girl the love and
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: like coming subscribe God for another day?
• 0:30
  Speaker 3: Hey, hey, I know we could be another way.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: It's a new weeknd. Just ask the podcast the safe
• 0:40
  Speaker 2: space where transparency meets transformation. I'm your girl, Jessica, as Smith,
• 0:44
  Speaker 2: and I do nothing without my girl. A rate, there's
• 0:49
  Speaker 2: a rate, there's a rate. Y'all know I still be
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: trying to figure about right, So y'all don't be coming
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: for me. Don't be coming for me. Thank you, Jessica.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: My friend loved me because I know she's gonna you know,
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: you know what I did that because I know friend
• 1:12
  Speaker 2: tried you to ask me for my help. That tells
• 1:17
  Speaker 2: you a lot, huh.
• 1:19
  Speaker 4: I mean what.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: Should you do? You was you know, we was we
• 1:21
  Speaker 2: was having you know, we was briefing to have a
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: good conversation with our guests. You know, I don't know
• 1:25
  Speaker 2: if he against anymore though this might be home for him.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. I'm excited about this one
• 1:31
  Speaker 2: because you know, the first episode I was just telling
• 1:33
  Speaker 2: him I said, I was a little boogie. I was
• 1:34
  Speaker 2: just you know, I was just Jessica. Now now I'm
• 1:37
  Speaker 2: jess You know you go from Jessica to Jests. It's
• 1:40
  Speaker 2: it's it's like some personal stuff going off. I'm good.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: Y'all see the book, y'all see the name. He needs
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: no introduction, but you know he's our favorite cousin. I
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: want you to put your hands together, get it up
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: in the check the comments. Gotta be live for this one. Baby,
• 1:56
  Speaker 2: I'm so excited to have my friend, our favorite cousin,
• 1:59
  Speaker 2: no other than Ladarius Hunt. Your said, el hut, el
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: hut if you need, I'm just what Jane's like, el
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: hut if you need, If you're hongry, el hut. If
• 2:15
  Speaker 2: you come on, old friend, we gonna use that. Yeah, yeah,
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: I like that. How you doing, friend, It's so good
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: to see you.
• 2:23
  Speaker 4: I'm blessed and favorite. I'm on a cloud right now.
• 2:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Because you've been outside it's per usual, doing your thing,
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: doing your thought. It seems like you're getting pulled. What
• 2:35
  Speaker 2: what the old people say every which away but loose.
• 2:41
  Speaker 5: But yeah, I'm booked, but it's awful, like I'm having
• 2:46
  Speaker 5: a great, great time.
• 2:47
  Speaker 4: Honestly, you are.
• 2:48
  Speaker 2: I want to I want to get into something because
• 2:53
  Speaker 2: I gotta. I want to publicly thank you. I've been waiting.
• 2:57
  Speaker 2: I've been waiting, and I think this is the perfect moment.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: I got the publicly thank you so recently the announcement
• 3:04
  Speaker 2: came out that I am a twenty twenty six ted
• 3:07
  Speaker 2: x Alabasta speaker and listen. I am excited. I'm also nervous,
• 3:14
  Speaker 2: but I am confident I can do it because my
• 3:17
  Speaker 2: friend over here, he put his name on me. Though, Like,
• 3:22
  Speaker 2: I just want to say thank you because not many
• 3:25
  Speaker 2: people will say like, oh I got you, We're good,
• 3:27
  Speaker 2: blah blah blah boo. But you You're one that when
• 3:31
  Speaker 2: you say something, you're gonna do it, and you never
• 3:34
  Speaker 2: you never told me that. You just said you know
• 3:36
  Speaker 2: you're gonna support me. We're gonna keep in touch on
• 3:38
  Speaker 2: everything you said on their last episode. It has happened,
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: and I'm just I just want to say thank you
• 3:44
  Speaker 2: for seeing me, thank you for the opportunity, and thank
• 3:47
  Speaker 2: you for not being stingy because somebody's counting to create
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: a stingy.
• 3:50
  Speaker 4: Absolutely there are.
• 3:52
  Speaker 5: But you know, that's why God made an ill hood
• 3:56
  Speaker 5: because everything that I seen in the intercepts of my
• 4:00
  Speaker 5: come up as an influencer, I don't want to be that,
• 4:03
  Speaker 5: you know. I want to be everything that I wish
• 4:05
  Speaker 5: that I had. And also too, my uncle always told
• 4:09
  Speaker 5: me growing up as a man, you don't if you
• 4:11
  Speaker 5: don't have a dollar in your pocket.
• 4:13
  Speaker 4: The one thing that you have is your word.
• 4:14
  Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, And so when I see
• 4:16
  Speaker 5: stuff in people, it just like takes over me, like
• 4:18
  Speaker 5: I can't even get it out of my head. And
• 4:22
  Speaker 5: also too, I'm just a real person. Like if I
• 4:24
  Speaker 5: don't see something for you, I just don't see it
• 4:25
  Speaker 5: for you. If I don't mess with you, I just don't.
• 4:27
  Speaker 5: If I don't rock with you, I just don't rock
• 4:28
  Speaker 5: with you.
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: I don't know how to. There's no great area, you know,
• 4:33
  Speaker 4: so with you.
• 4:35
  Speaker 5: When it came to TEDx Alabasta, and when I was
• 4:37
  Speaker 5: thinking about, like, Okay, this is about to come up again,
• 4:40
  Speaker 5: I'm like, I just I love the way you articulate yourself.
• 4:42
  Speaker 5: I think that you know you've made great strides with
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: your podcast, as far as like just being so like
• 4:53
  Speaker 5: positive and motivating and just giving people words when they
• 4:57
  Speaker 5: when they hear and in person. And I'm like, I
• 5:00
  Speaker 5: just I see that for you, you know, because I
• 5:03
  Speaker 5: feel like for me, ted X elevated me to another
• 5:07
  Speaker 5: level as far as like speaking, as far as the
• 5:11
  Speaker 5: opportunities that I've gotten to speak, the panels that I've
• 5:14
  Speaker 5: been on, I've done things with the city council, I've
• 5:16
  Speaker 5: been in the schools, I've been key no speaker, all
• 5:20
  Speaker 5: these things I could have never fathom in my life,
• 5:23
  Speaker 5: you know.
• 5:23
  Speaker 4: And so I know what it did for me.
• 5:25
  Speaker 5: It bloomed into a lot of beautiful things, not just
• 5:30
  Speaker 5: speaking but a book. And I know we'll get into that,
• 5:33
  Speaker 5: but I just know what it can do for you
• 5:35
  Speaker 5: and what it can spark you. Not everyone that did
• 5:38
  Speaker 5: the ted X of Alabastera with me wrote a book,
• 5:41
  Speaker 5: but that's what it did for you, you know. So
• 5:43
  Speaker 5: it may spark something different for you, but I just
• 5:47
  Speaker 5: know what it can do for you. So I saw
• 5:49
  Speaker 5: that in you. I see that for you, and I
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: just had to make that connection.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: Like I said, I appreciate that because like I was
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: just so shocked, like what's in is like, I don't
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: think I told you this like the same week. I
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: think it was the day before. Actually the day before
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: I was talking to the Lord and I said, Lord,
• 6:12
  Speaker 2: I want more speaking engagement. I said, I know, you know,
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: I talked different, like I got a different swag. I'm
• 6:18
  Speaker 2: not the pretty proper type of person, but I would
• 6:21
  Speaker 2: want to be ready for stages like Ted eggs, I mean,
• 6:23
  Speaker 2: no Ted talk. That's why I told him. I said,
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: I want to be prepared for stages like Ted talk.
• 6:28
  Speaker 2: That's exactly what I told him. And then the next
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: day you text me, Hey, somebody's gonna reach out to you.
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: Oh okay, I'm thinking it's for podcasts or whatever. Okay,
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: you got my name and shout out to Lisa. Thank you.
• 6:40
  Speaker 2: She's so sweet, Like she's so sweet. I was just
• 6:42
  Speaker 2: so I don't know for you to grasp that so quickly.
• 6:46
  Speaker 2: You have a gift in that who like I can
• 6:49
  Speaker 2: just I can just see why you're in your space
• 6:52
  Speaker 2: right right, and you said something. I think it's important
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: for us to point out that if it's not for
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: you and I don't see it, I'm not gonna force it.
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: Some people think that just because they know you just
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: because they connected to you, just because they're doing the
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: same thing that they should receive the reward or receive
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: the I won't say the validation, but the sponsorship. I
• 7:15
  Speaker 2: would say that of your voice, of your approval of
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: them to others. How do you have navigate those type
• 7:25
  Speaker 2: of conversations like maybe you're not ready yet.
• 7:28
  Speaker 4: I don't think it's a conversation that has to be navigated.
• 7:31
  Speaker 5: To be honest with you, Okay, yeah, I'm not going
• 7:33
  Speaker 5: to validate my feelings and the things that I do
• 7:37
  Speaker 5: to appease people around me. The things that I do
• 7:41
  Speaker 5: for people are because it's on my heart to do,
• 7:44
  Speaker 5: you know. So why am I explaining to you why
• 7:48
  Speaker 5: I helped or not even necessarily help, because it's all God.
• 7:52
  Speaker 5: But how I God put it on my spirit to
• 7:56
  Speaker 5: give someone else a platform.
• 7:59
  Speaker 4: I'm not going back and forth about that, you know.
• 8:02
  Speaker 5: So for me, honestly, people don't ever questioned me about
• 8:06
  Speaker 5: stuff like that, because, if I'm being quite honest with you,
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: it's so many things that I do for people that
• 8:11
  Speaker 5: nobody knows about that I do.
• 8:13
  Speaker 4: As far as opportunities. I'm gonna give you an example.
• 8:17
  Speaker 5: It's some people, some kind scorators that I don't necessarily
• 8:19
  Speaker 5: rock with. You know, they're not my cup of tea,
• 8:21
  Speaker 5: and that's fine. But it's been brands that reached out
• 8:24
  Speaker 5: to me like, hey, I want to work with you,
• 8:25
  Speaker 5: but hey, can you give us a group? Can you
• 8:27
  Speaker 5: give us a group of ten other influences, whether I
• 8:29
  Speaker 5: rock with you or not, if you're doing your thing,
• 8:31
  Speaker 5: hey la hit them up and they hit them up.
• 8:34
  Speaker 5: The person probably never knew that I was the one
• 8:36
  Speaker 5: that connected me, and that's fine.
• 8:38
  Speaker 4: I'm cool with that.
• 8:39
  Speaker 5: I don't need that, but I know what my spirit
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: led me to do, you know what I'm saying. So
• 8:43
  Speaker 5: I know that I've given a lot of people opportunities,
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: whether they know it or they don't know it. But
• 8:48
  Speaker 5: that's just the type of person that I am, you
• 8:50
  Speaker 5: know what I'm saying. I can be like I don't
• 8:51
  Speaker 5: know no about it, you know, but I'm not a
• 8:54
  Speaker 5: hater because you know, that's just what That's what it's
• 8:57
  Speaker 5: all about. Like we gotta if we're trying to work
• 9:00
  Speaker 5: to build Birmingham and build the people up in Birmingham,
• 9:02
  Speaker 5: we have to be at we got to take ourself
• 9:04
  Speaker 5: out of it.
• 9:04
  Speaker 4: Sometimes. So I don't really have people that questioned me
• 9:07
  Speaker 4: about that, because, like I said.
• 9:08
  Speaker 5: If you, if you're around me and your cloaks proximity
• 9:10
  Speaker 5: and something makes sense for you, and.
• 9:12
  Speaker 4: I see it for you, I got you.
• 9:15
  Speaker 2: I love it. I love it. You brought up something that, uh,
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: just recently we found out Usher Raymond and Christopher Maurice
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: Brown is gone on tour. Okay, I'm really excited about that.
• 9:27
  Speaker 2: If you can't tell. I love the fact that you
• 9:29
  Speaker 2: had your status about that, and I was like, yes,
• 9:31
  Speaker 2: that was.
• 9:32
  Speaker 5: All random, and people just I don't know why. That
• 9:34
  Speaker 5: was just a random intrusive thought of mine and everybody.
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I love thoughts. Your intrutive thoughts are some
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: things I can't say. I can't say. But I brought
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: that up because even with you saying that if if
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: they can collab, they got money, they sell out stadiums
• 9:53
  Speaker 2: by themselves, they got they got platforms already, and they
• 9:57
  Speaker 2: about to share one. Crazy. So I'm curious to know
• 10:02
  Speaker 2: who are three people who are three just content creators
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: that you aspire to or would like to see yourself
• 10:10
  Speaker 2: collaborating with.
• 10:18
  Speaker 4: I would love to maybe like do something like a
• 10:22
  Speaker 4: Keith Lee.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: You know it'll be dumb. I love.
• 10:29
  Speaker 4: Who else? Honestly?
• 10:31
  Speaker 5: To be quite honest, the people that I really wanted
• 10:35
  Speaker 5: to work with I have, Okay, you know, I know,
• 10:40
  Speaker 5: well not because most of the people that I wanted
• 10:43
  Speaker 5: to work with were more not necessarily local, but they're
• 10:45
  Speaker 5: from Birmingham.
• 10:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, likely Aora or Flosto Mac or b Lan or
• 10:52
  Speaker 4: Big dadding them.
• 10:53
  Speaker 5: Like all these people are people that I looked at
• 10:56
  Speaker 5: before I got my platform, and so I used to
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: watch them, you know, and so for and they've done great,
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: like outside of just being from Birmingham, they have taking
• 11:07
  Speaker 5: their careers way beyond Birmingham.
• 11:10
  Speaker 4: So for me, they were people that I like, really
• 11:12
  Speaker 4: watched and I'm like, I they they.
• 11:15
  Speaker 5: Inspired me, you know, and I gave them that flyers
• 11:18
  Speaker 5: and I let them know that and that's why I had.
• 11:21
  Speaker 4: Most of them are part of my event this past
• 11:22
  Speaker 4: February which which.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: Ate Down Deesil Ray, Yes eight Down. It was so beautiful, baby, baby,
• 11:31
  Speaker 2: so beautiful. You told me, you told me, But it's
• 11:35
  Speaker 2: not why I didn't believe you.
• 11:36
  Speaker 4: I didn't even believe it. Bruh, I didn't even believe.
• 11:39
  Speaker 2: It, bruh. Let me let me let me tell you
• 11:41
  Speaker 2: how me and Desert Ray was examining everything we was.
• 11:44
  Speaker 2: We were talking to the people, but we was looking
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: at When we walked in the room, the first thing
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: I saw was you know, blowing way you playing it
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: to the right. It had your little your logo.
• 11:55
  Speaker 5: Oh and if y'all know we had to go through
• 11:56
  Speaker 5: to oh god it people don't be knowing like the
• 12:01
  Speaker 5: inside of like putting an event together. The final presentation
• 12:06
  Speaker 5: was it blew my mind. I don't even know if
• 12:08
  Speaker 5: y'all saw or not. I don't know if y'all caught
• 12:10
  Speaker 5: me in the corner crime.
• 12:11
  Speaker 4: Yeah we did, Okay, yep.
• 12:12
  Speaker 5: I was crying real tears because I was so overwhelmed
• 12:15
  Speaker 5: with the fact that we did it, and then my
• 12:18
  Speaker 5: family was there, and then it was just so many
• 12:21
  Speaker 5: emotions going over. I don't even cry like that, I
• 12:23
  Speaker 5: promise I don't, but I was so emotional because I
• 12:26
  Speaker 5: could not believe that first of all, everybody was there
• 12:29
  Speaker 5: congregating for me, or not just for me, but for
• 12:32
  Speaker 5: the purpose that I put out into the world, you know,
• 12:35
  Speaker 5: with my Eating Greek series, and then having my family there,
• 12:39
  Speaker 5: and then just like the Bully, it was just a
• 12:40
  Speaker 5: lot of things on me at one time, I'm like,
• 12:42
  Speaker 5: this is really really a lot, and I don't even know.
• 12:45
  Speaker 4: My My uncle was like, why are you crying? I
• 12:47
  Speaker 4: was like, I don't even know.
• 12:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because it's like when God shows you something and
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: then you actually start walking in it, you be like,
• 12:57
  Speaker 2: what like this one, this one, this one play play.
• 13:00
  Speaker 2: In your book you talk about how what you thought
• 13:04
  Speaker 2: was your imagination was actually your faith, and it's like,
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: it's almost that's what I think about your eating Greek
• 13:11
  Speaker 2: like people traveled like so far.
• 13:14
  Speaker 4: From Florida, from Mississippi, from Montgomery.
• 13:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, now I'm curious about one thing. And then we're
• 13:20
  Speaker 2: gonna get into this this game that we're gonna play.
• 13:22
  Speaker 2: I've never played a game on my on my podcast,
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: So we're gonna play this game. But it's gonna be good.
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: Bloom the energy drink. How in the world When I
• 13:37
  Speaker 2: saw that, I was like, he's a mastermind.
• 13:40
  Speaker 4: Like, let me tell y'all. Was so crazy.
• 13:43
  Speaker 5: I'm gonna tell y'all, I was so crazy, and I'm
• 13:44
  Speaker 5: gonna tell you how God like, I just know that
• 13:47
  Speaker 5: God don't play by me.
• 13:49
  Speaker 4: Come on, he don't play by me.
• 13:50
  Speaker 5: Because so my best friend Maria, she has poised the
• 13:58
  Speaker 5: event style, like that's her business. And just like like
• 14:02
  Speaker 5: I was telling you earlier, I pulled her out of
• 14:04
  Speaker 5: retirement every single year because she don't necessarily she's been
• 14:08
  Speaker 5: trying to like she don't really want.
• 14:10
  Speaker 2: To do it.
• 14:10
  Speaker 4: I'm like, no, you're going to do it. I believe
• 14:12
  Speaker 4: in you like enough to And she loved it, like
• 14:15
  Speaker 4: she it gets her energy or whatever.
• 14:17
  Speaker 5: But we were talking about the event or whatever, and
• 14:19
  Speaker 5: I was like, you know, this year, I want to
• 14:22
  Speaker 5: elevate the event, like I want to have activations, you know,
• 14:27
  Speaker 5: because I want to move on to bigger. I want
• 14:30
  Speaker 5: the event to be bigger and bigger at the year's
• 14:32
  Speaker 5: press or whatever. So I was like, you know, I
• 14:34
  Speaker 5: want to figure something out or whatever. I promise y'all.
• 14:37
  Speaker 5: I don't even It was so random. I got an
• 14:39
  Speaker 5: email got an email, which I get a lot of emails,
• 14:43
  Speaker 5: but I got an email and it was from this
• 14:45
  Speaker 5: marketing company or whatever, and they do marketing for Bloom
• 14:50
  Speaker 5: and kind Bar and the water Box and just a
• 14:56
  Speaker 5: bunch of different like healthier alternatives or whatever.
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: And I was like, h hmm.
• 15:00
  Speaker 4: So I ended up going on their website and they
• 15:02
  Speaker 4: was like partnership and then on that website.
• 15:07
  Speaker 5: They said they do partnerships for like where I can
• 15:10
  Speaker 5: like post on social media or they do event partnerships,
• 15:13
  Speaker 5: and I was like, oh and so little. I was like,
• 15:15
  Speaker 5: I'm just gonna I'm just gonna apply for it and
• 15:17
  Speaker 5: see what happens or whatever. Didn't think that, nothing moved
• 15:20
  Speaker 5: moved on like you know, just it was I was
• 15:25
  Speaker 5: just I don't even remember what. But then next thing,
• 15:27
  Speaker 5: you know, I got like eight boxes delivered and I
• 15:32
  Speaker 5: was like, what is this? But I had I didn't
• 15:34
  Speaker 5: go back and check the email, but I had got
• 15:36
  Speaker 5: the email that they approved the partnership. All they needed
• 15:39
  Speaker 5: for was they wanted product placement, and they wanted great photos.
• 15:43
  Speaker 4: And things like to sending them with them. And then
• 15:46
  Speaker 4: they told me to like, whatever you need from us in.
• 15:47
  Speaker 5: The future as far as like partnerships, whatever, whatever brands
• 15:50
  Speaker 5: we work with, we got you. And that was just
• 15:53
  Speaker 5: I just literally applied. But of course, you know, they
• 15:55
  Speaker 5: had to look at my following previous evalue and stuff
• 15:58
  Speaker 5: like that.
• 16:00
  Speaker 4: Random. Really it was a thought. Then the email. Then
• 16:04
  Speaker 4: it happened, but you put it.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: But it wasn't just a thought. It was you putting
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: in the effort and we were just talking about a
• 16:11
  Speaker 2: few moments ago, like setting yourself up to be in
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: the place that you want to be, or you've envisioned
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: yourself being. You just can't stay in the imagination of things,
• 16:21
  Speaker 2: And so how what is it? What is for somebody
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: that's like, Okay, I have not been able to put
• 16:28
  Speaker 2: myself in the position to where I can just send
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: an email, what advice would you give to them? Like,
• 16:34
  Speaker 2: how did you structure yourself from imagination to being at
• 16:38
  Speaker 2: the point where you can partner with somebody like bloom?
• 16:41
  Speaker 5: I think it's just honestly, you know, I kind of
• 16:44
  Speaker 5: asked me if I ask myself that question, because I'm like,
• 16:48
  Speaker 5: I don't know how things be happening, Jess, I really don't. Like,
• 16:53
  Speaker 5: you know, sometimes I feel like I put things out
• 16:55
  Speaker 5: into the atmosphere, or like thoughts come over me.
• 17:00
  Speaker 4: But little that's just what I think it is.
• 17:02
  Speaker 5: Sometimes I think it's just a thought, but then it's
• 17:04
  Speaker 5: just like some kind of way the God just brings
• 17:09
  Speaker 5: it all back to me, you know. But I would
• 17:11
  Speaker 5: just tell people to speak it out of your mouth
• 17:14
  Speaker 5: into the world, you know it Like I was just
• 17:17
  Speaker 5: I was talking too, Like I said, I was talking
• 17:18
  Speaker 5: so my best friend, and I.
• 17:22
  Speaker 4: Wasn't thinking that it would happen.
• 17:24
  Speaker 5: I just was like literally imagining, what if what you know, activations,
• 17:29
  Speaker 5: I want activations or whatever. I just feel like you
• 17:31
  Speaker 5: have to be very intentional about what you speak out
• 17:33
  Speaker 5: your mouth. Yeah, those are the things that.
• 17:37
  Speaker 4: Happened for you and I. And sometimes it be.
• 17:39
  Speaker 5: Blowing my mind because I'm just like, wait a minute,
• 17:41
  Speaker 5: I just said that, and then here we are, you know,
• 17:45
  Speaker 5: so it's just about saying it.
• 17:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so good. So I mean I'm over here
• 17:51
  Speaker 2: just uber excited to get into this this game. So
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: I was reading a book Blowing Way You plan it.
• 17:59
  Speaker 2: You can get it off airwell, airwell you can get
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: off airwhell. We're gonna have to link in the description.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: But Blue Way you playing it. First of all, let
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: me say that this is not just a book. This
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: is like you literally told me this, but it's literally
• 18:13
  Speaker 2: a love letter. Yeah, like it is a reflection. It's
• 18:17
  Speaker 2: a diary, like you really let us in to your thoughts, yeah,
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: on different aspects of you. So, as I was reading it,
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: the idea came to me is I'm gonna give you
• 18:28
  Speaker 2: some quotes or some words that you use in this book,
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: and we're gonna talk about it, okay, okay, but you're
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: gonna choose what we're doing, and you gonna I got
• 18:38
  Speaker 2: five things, okay, okay, You're gonna choose a number one
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: through five and our mark off the ones we've already done. Okay,
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: So that makes sense what I said, so.
• 18:47
  Speaker 4: Said over time. So you gotta say a phrase, uh huh,
• 18:50
  Speaker 4: and then I'm gonna say a number one through five.
• 18:51
  Speaker 2: You gonna choose a number one through five and the
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: number that is attached it's a phrase attached to those
• 18:56
  Speaker 2: that number, and we're gonna talk about it. Okay, okay,
• 18:59
  Speaker 2: all right, so you're ready, one through five.
• 19:03
  Speaker 4: Hmm, we're gonna do one.
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: Okay. One is good. One is good.
• 19:10
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 19:11
  Speaker 2: In this book, you said community isn't work. It isn't content.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: It's impact. Community isn't Let me make sure I said
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: that right, because I wrote this now y'all know. Look
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: here it is. Yeah, community work isn't content, it's impact.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: That's on page forty three if y'all reading with me,
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: all right, So in this this is the building community,
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: one event at a time. And I think that you
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: were talking about I'm just gonna have read this up
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: a paragraph. One moment I'll never forget happened at my
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: first toy drive. A single mother came to pick up
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: gibbs for her children and broke down crime. That moment
• 19:53
  Speaker 2: stuck with me. It changed something in me. It reminded
• 19:56
  Speaker 2: me that community wasn't community. Work isn't content is impact
• 20:01
  Speaker 2: it matters? Can you can you walk us down down
• 20:04
  Speaker 2: that thought? Because sometimes sometimes we content too much, you
• 20:11
  Speaker 2: know what.
• 20:12
  Speaker 4: So as I've been going through this journey, I.
• 20:17
  Speaker 5: When I first started, I was just doing it out
• 20:21
  Speaker 5: of just habit, Like I was just doing finding the
• 20:24
  Speaker 5: hobby kind disorder.
• 20:25
  Speaker 4: I was just But then I started to try to
• 20:29
  Speaker 4: figure out, like what's my purpose? What am I doing
• 20:32
  Speaker 4: with this or whatever? But I couldn't.
• 20:34
  Speaker 5: I have always been a people magnet, you know, and
• 20:37
  Speaker 5: my family always said that about me, Like I've always
• 20:41
  Speaker 5: been well received by people, you know that my entire life,
• 20:44
  Speaker 5: I've never had an issue with like cultivating relationships, that's
• 20:50
  Speaker 5: never been the issue for me, and keeping them my
• 20:53
  Speaker 5: friends stick like gricks. So that's just kind of like
• 20:55
  Speaker 5: how life has always been for me. So when I
• 20:59
  Speaker 5: think about out like my platform, I'm like hmmm, sitting
• 21:03
  Speaker 5: behind this screen and like people.
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: Watching you from that phone for me is just not enough.
• 21:09
  Speaker 4: What are you gonna do with that?
• 21:10
  Speaker 5: And so, like I told you the last time, like
• 21:12
  Speaker 5: I tell anybody in any interview I do, my success
• 21:18
  Speaker 5: has been a combination of God.
• 21:21
  Speaker 4: Him giving me the free will, and people believing in me.
• 21:24
  Speaker 5: And I think throughout my journey, people has forced me
• 21:28
  Speaker 5: into situations that has grown me in a way and
• 21:31
  Speaker 5: made me realize my purpose even more because now I
• 21:34
  Speaker 5: understand that I have the ability to do toy drives
• 21:40
  Speaker 5: to do back to the school, drives to do, you know,
• 21:44
  Speaker 5: sponsoring people for a prom or whatever it is that
• 21:47
  Speaker 5: I choose to do, whether it's panels, going into these schools.
• 21:50
  Speaker 5: I've probably been to so many different Birmingham City schools.
• 21:53
  Speaker 5: I went back to my old high school. I was
• 21:55
  Speaker 5: the keynote speaking for that senior installation I was. I
• 21:58
  Speaker 5: was there for like I been to career days, career fairs,
• 22:02
  Speaker 5: all these things or whatever. To me, that's what it's
• 22:04
  Speaker 5: most about, because it's one thing to talk about it
• 22:08
  Speaker 5: or just be on your phone or just creating the content,
• 22:11
  Speaker 5: But it's another thing when you actually are being impactful
• 22:14
  Speaker 5: in the community physically, you know, because we all can
• 22:18
  Speaker 5: talk about what we're gonna do online or what we
• 22:21
  Speaker 5: want to do. It's just about being out there and
• 22:23
  Speaker 5: actually doing it. And so that's what I've been so
• 22:27
  Speaker 5: intentional about at this phage of my journey. Because I'm visible.
• 22:33
  Speaker 5: People know who I am, the kids know who I am,
• 22:37
  Speaker 5: you know, and all these things. The city knows who
• 22:39
  Speaker 5: who I am. So it's it's best for me to
• 22:41
  Speaker 5: use that and leverage that in the most positive way.
• 22:44
  Speaker 5: And I can't think of a more positive way than
• 22:46
  Speaker 5: to actually be out kissing babies, shaking hands, yeah, and actually.
• 22:52
  Speaker 4: Doing the work.
• 22:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah. How do you choose, especially with a situation like that,
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: with the single mom, Like, how do you choose to
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: the impact that you broadcast? Like how do you navigate that? Well?
• 23:05
  Speaker 4: You know what's so crazy?
• 23:07
  Speaker 5: Actually, the single mom situation that I'm talking about in
• 23:09
  Speaker 5: the book that happened before I was even an influencer.
• 23:12
  Speaker 4: Yeah, that happened in like twenty something like that.
• 23:20
  Speaker 5: So I've been doing I've been doing things like that
• 23:22
  Speaker 5: before I even became an influencer. But I think it's
• 23:27
  Speaker 5: about just using your emotional intelligence, you know.
• 23:32
  Speaker 4: I don't want to.
• 23:35
  Speaker 5: Put someone out there that's not willing to be put
• 23:37
  Speaker 5: out there, you know, and especially it depends on the initiative.
• 23:40
  Speaker 5: Sometimes some certain instances calls for kids or parents or
• 23:46
  Speaker 5: whoever the case might be, to be on camera. Like,
• 23:47
  Speaker 5: for instance, I did a partnership with Hibbit, and one
• 23:50
  Speaker 5: of the partnership that we did around around Christmas was
• 23:53
  Speaker 5: a Christmas giveaway.
• 23:54
  Speaker 4: But they wanted me to show that.
• 23:56
  Speaker 5: They wanted me to show me taking the kids shopping
• 23:59
  Speaker 5: at Hibbit for or the items or whatever. And so
• 24:02
  Speaker 5: the mom was completely aware of that or whatever, because
• 24:04
  Speaker 5: that was a part of we have the show. Yeah,
• 24:07
  Speaker 5: what we're doing, Yeah, you know, with the thing or whatever.
• 24:09
  Speaker 5: But sometimes some people don't want to be seen or
• 24:13
  Speaker 5: you know, they don't want to be shown.
• 24:14
  Speaker 4: And that's fine.
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it's like a consumer and it's I'm
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: not saying this, not me, okay, because I understand that
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: things have to be visible so they can be seen,
• 24:24
  Speaker 2: right like you have to. You have to. It's not
• 24:26
  Speaker 2: even a marketing thing. It's like, hey, I'm letting you know.
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: But there are people that just really genuinely think that
• 24:32
  Speaker 2: all all theyre doing is doing this for this, like
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: as far as like in a negative and negative light,
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: but it's really needed. So but you also have to have,
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: like you said, emotionally intelligence but also be integral about Okay,
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: maybe I shouldn't do this, or maybe I shouldn't do that,
• 24:51
  Speaker 2: but I think that's on both sides. We need to
• 24:53
  Speaker 2: hear that. Okay, So next number, because it's one I
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: want to really get to.
• 24:57
  Speaker 4: But I want you to choose the number three.
• 25:02
  Speaker 2: Okay. Okay, this one good, this one good, Okay, let
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: me go. Let me go to this page. It's paid
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: sixty one. Okay, So in sixty one. The chapter is
• 25:15
  Speaker 2: the letter to the little boy I was in this
• 25:19
  Speaker 2: particular sentence you says, you say, referring to you, I
• 25:23
  Speaker 2: didn't need to be more masculine, and this is referring
• 25:27
  Speaker 2: to you being bolling. And I'm actually gonna mix two
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: of them. So so we can't do a wait, hold
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: up three, three and no? No, three and five okay,
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: So five is gone, all right, So I'm about to
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: read this and it's just this gripped me real good.
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: So it says, I tell him I'm proud of us
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: more than you'll ever understand. I needed you to survive
• 25:56
  Speaker 2: so I could evolve, and now I'm healing you. I
• 26:01
  Speaker 2: tell him he was always worthy, long before he felt
• 26:05
  Speaker 2: it that he didn't need to fit in, didn't need
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: to be more masculine. There's a two parts to this,
• 26:14
  Speaker 2: and we're gonna break this down. What does it mean
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: to be masculine?
• 26:19
  Speaker 5: Well, for me, masculine as being meaning being a man
• 26:24
  Speaker 5: is showing up and keeping your word and taking care
• 26:29
  Speaker 5: of your family and pouring into your family and doing
• 26:32
  Speaker 5: all the things that you say you're gonna do.
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: But I think and a lot of men can relate
• 26:37
  Speaker 4: to this growing up.
• 26:40
  Speaker 5: I'm gonna I'm just gonna speak about our people. You know,
• 26:44
  Speaker 5: I can't speak about anybody else. It's because I don't know,
• 26:46
  Speaker 5: but it's there's a thing with this over hyper masculinity.
• 26:52
  Speaker 4: And you have to play sports.
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: You have to.
• 26:56
  Speaker 4: You have to play sports.
• 26:57
  Speaker 5: You know that you play sports, and you demers weak,
• 27:01
  Speaker 5: yeah or whatever or soft or what theever case may be.
• 27:04
  Speaker 5: They feel like, if you play sports it hardens you up.
• 27:07
  Speaker 4: Yeah, it makes you more of a man.
• 27:09
  Speaker 5: And so I felt inadequate mm growing up because I
• 27:14
  Speaker 5: wasn't I didn't fit into that mold that wasn't my thing.
• 27:17
  Speaker 4: I even got forced to play sports that that wasn't
• 27:20
  Speaker 4: my thing to do, you know.
• 27:21
  Speaker 2: I was.
• 27:22
  Speaker 4: I was into academics, you know, I was into architect
• 27:27
  Speaker 4: as a young boy.
• 27:28
  Speaker 5: Like I I liked other things or whatever, but those
• 27:31
  Speaker 5: things were not catered into because it wasn't it wasn't
• 27:35
  Speaker 5: deemed as masculine.
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: So so c cause I can only imagine growing up
• 27:40
  Speaker 2: on the North Side and then being forced to all
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: that stuff. My curiosity cause I would hear you bring
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: your uncle up. I hear you bring your mom and
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: your aunt so but I bringing your dad up? Is
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: that connected to the idea of masculinity and what might
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: have been forced onto you?
• 27:59
  Speaker 4: You know, I think it was just his family in general.
• 28:01
  Speaker 4: His family in general, that's there, that's their thing.
• 28:04
  Speaker 5: Like they love sports, you know, and every little boy
• 28:08
  Speaker 5: that come up there is going to be an NFL
• 28:10
  Speaker 5: star and they don't quite have one yet.
• 28:13
  Speaker 4: So to me, success it looks like.
• 28:19
  Speaker 5: You can be whatever you My cousin he's just he's
• 28:22
  Speaker 5: in med school and he's going to be a doctor.
• 28:25
  Speaker 5: I'm an influencer, a marketer, you know, and we're probably
• 28:29
  Speaker 5: there two more successful men in the family.
• 28:31
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 28:32
  Speaker 4: So it's important to pour into your kids, no matter
• 28:35
  Speaker 4: what it is that they're interested in.
• 28:38
  Speaker 5: And so I think it does stem from that, you know,
• 28:41
  Speaker 5: And I'm not resentful for it, because at the end
• 28:43
  Speaker 5: of the day, my therapist tells me out of time
• 28:47
  Speaker 5: to start doing this.
• 28:48
  Speaker 4: But I feel indicated.
• 28:51
  Speaker 2: Okay, let's talk about it.
• 28:53
  Speaker 5: I mean, I feel like obviously, you know, I mean,
• 29:03
  Speaker 5: I don't have the words to say, to be able
• 29:05
  Speaker 5: to articulate it, to be quite answer with you.
• 29:06
  Speaker 4: Obviously look at me.
• 29:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know.
• 29:09
  Speaker 4: And that is not on ococky stuff. That is not
• 29:13
  Speaker 4: me being shady.
• 29:14
  Speaker 5: That's just me telling the truth. Yeah, what I'm saying, like,
• 29:16
  Speaker 5: I think I worked out. I think I turned out pretty.
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: Fine, though you turned out excellent. But you also said connected.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: Connecting with that is that let me not lie.
• 29:26
  Speaker 4: I needed him.
• 29:28
  Speaker 2: You need it, You need it's you said, I'm proud
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: of us more than you'll ever understand. I needed you
• 29:34
  Speaker 2: to survive so I could evolve and now I'm healing you.
• 29:39
  Speaker 4: I needed to.
• 29:43
  Speaker 5: I needed to go through everything that I went through.
• 29:45
  Speaker 5: I needed to have the experiences throughout my life that
• 29:49
  Speaker 5: I had. Every part of my life as far as
• 29:53
  Speaker 5: my childhood is concerned. It needed to happen for me,
• 29:56
  Speaker 5: Like in the moment when I was younger, I'm like,
• 29:58
  Speaker 5: oh my god, I hate my life. If, oh my god,
• 30:00
  Speaker 5: this is so bad, moving all the time, staying with
• 30:04
  Speaker 5: this person, like just life, it just seems so chaotic
• 30:07
  Speaker 5: for me. If I had not gone through those things,
• 30:12
  Speaker 5: how would I know how to properly heal myself now?
• 30:15
  Speaker 5: Because the thing about it is, I think that I
• 30:21
  Speaker 5: for a large part of my life, I was so
• 30:24
  Speaker 5: upset with who I thought was the blame for the
• 30:29
  Speaker 5: things that for the way life went. But as I
• 30:33
  Speaker 5: don't know, if something hit me, like when I got
• 30:35
  Speaker 5: to my thirties and it was just like you know
• 30:36
  Speaker 5: what they were. They were just trying to figure out
• 30:40
  Speaker 5: life themselves, you know. But it's important for me too,
• 30:50
  Speaker 5: as I'm in therapy to not just have therapy for myself,
• 30:55
  Speaker 5: but have therapy for little Ladarius. You know, talk to him,
• 31:00
  Speaker 5: speak to him. Me and my therapists do that all
• 31:02
  Speaker 5: the time.
• 31:02
  Speaker 4: We talked to him.
• 31:04
  Speaker 5: So how did how did you How did that make
• 31:05
  Speaker 5: younger she called me Darius? How did that make younger
• 31:08
  Speaker 5: Darius feel? What was younger Darius thinking? In that moment
• 31:11
  Speaker 5: and we're healing him. Yeah, because if I don't heal him,
• 31:15
  Speaker 5: I won't be full of evolved.
• 31:17
  Speaker 4: You know.
• 31:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah, what's the hardest, most challenging thing that you've had
• 31:21
  Speaker 2: to talk to little Ladarius or Darius?
• 31:27
  Speaker 4: I think for me it's it's.
• 31:29
  Speaker 5: Not even more so necessarily from childhood. It's more so
• 31:32
  Speaker 5: from adulthood and learning and the things that I didn't
• 31:35
  Speaker 5: know or wasn't talk.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I have to.
• 31:39
  Speaker 5: I think a lot of times we spend so much
• 31:42
  Speaker 5: time beating ourselves up about the mistakes that we made.
• 31:45
  Speaker 5: You know, it could have been something you did four
• 31:47
  Speaker 5: years ago, three years ago, and you're like, it's a
• 31:49
  Speaker 5: constant loop in your head.
• 31:51
  Speaker 4: So I have to.
• 31:54
  Speaker 5: Forgive myself for the mistakes I may and forgive those
• 31:57
  Speaker 5: people that I feel like should have taught me those
• 32:01
  Speaker 5: not to make those.
• 32:01
  Speaker 4: Mistakes, you know.
• 32:02
  Speaker 5: And so a lot of that is that, Yeah, you know,
• 32:06
  Speaker 5: because honestly, we've come me and my therapist, I've been
• 32:09
  Speaker 5: in therapy now for about two years. We've made tremendous drives.
• 32:13
  Speaker 5: You know, I am not the person I was two
• 32:15
  Speaker 5: years ago. I was bitter, I was upset. I did
• 32:19
  Speaker 5: not know that I was bitter and upset. I didn't
• 32:21
  Speaker 5: know that I was holding on to so many things
• 32:23
  Speaker 5: and that I was upset with so many people, and
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: also writing this book was healing from men because at
• 32:28
  Speaker 5: the end of the day, I was able to get
• 32:29
  Speaker 5: it out. I don't care how to make anybody feel.
• 32:32
  Speaker 5: This is my story, you know, and so I'm not apologizing.
• 32:36
  Speaker 5: I'm not It's already.
• 32:37
  Speaker 4: Road, it's printed.
• 32:39
  Speaker 5: We got the right, So I'm not going back and
• 32:42
  Speaker 5: forth about my life and what I went through and
• 32:46
  Speaker 5: how I felt, you know, and to some people may
• 32:49
  Speaker 5: be confusing or some people. To some people may be
• 32:51
  Speaker 5: the first time they ever heard that or even knew
• 32:53
  Speaker 5: that that was in my mind. But that's because it
• 32:55
  Speaker 5: was in my mind.
• 32:56
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, So did you feel Did you ever
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: feel like you had the permission to really though? Before? Now?
• 33:04
  Speaker 5: No, because I think I got to a point of
• 33:05
  Speaker 5: my life and now I don't just don't care, you know, not,
• 33:09
  Speaker 5: I care, but then I just don't have the capacity
• 33:12
  Speaker 5: to coddle people's feelings and what they feel about it.
• 33:16
  Speaker 4: It's about me and becoming my best self.
• 33:19
  Speaker 5: Because in this world of being an influencer, you have,
• 33:23
  Speaker 5: you experienced so much, you encounter so many different people
• 33:28
  Speaker 5: who have so many different intentions.
• 33:31
  Speaker 4: It's so important to have a clear mind, as clear
• 33:34
  Speaker 4: of a mind as possible.
• 33:35
  Speaker 5: Yeah, And for me, releasing those things as I moved
• 33:38
  Speaker 5: to this next chapter of my life and being in
• 33:41
  Speaker 5: therapy is important for me because there's no way I
• 33:45
  Speaker 5: can take on all of what I've been through in
• 33:47
  Speaker 5: my life and the baggage that I had into this
• 33:50
  Speaker 5: next phase of my life because I'll be lashing out, crashing.
• 33:54
  Speaker 4: Out and on the news.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and we don't want that news.
• 34:02
  Speaker 4: They won't be on your side.
• 34:03
  Speaker 2: Ben, come on, they'd be like, there is tell me
• 34:14
  Speaker 2: what you know about me? Y'all listen. Now, this is
• 34:19
  Speaker 2: good because I'm learning a lot and I'm hearing what
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: you're saying. I can relate to what you're saying too.
• 34:23
  Speaker 2: Because my therapies is my best friend. I can't wait
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: to fire her so she can be my best friend
• 34:27
  Speaker 2: in real life.
• 34:28
  Speaker 4: Because we said I can't wait some week, I'm not.
• 34:32
  Speaker 4: But you're not going nowhere, so I don't know.
• 34:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the that's the tale right there. It's like
• 34:36
  Speaker 2: I don't know when I can fire you because I
• 34:39
  Speaker 2: really need you right now because you're keeping me out
• 34:42
  Speaker 2: of jail. Okay, But I think that you're saying something
• 34:45
  Speaker 2: so powerful because one of the biggest lessons I've learned
• 34:48
  Speaker 2: and the hiccups I had to get over, was my
• 34:52
  Speaker 2: daddy wasn't Superman and my mama wasn't the building and
• 34:57
  Speaker 2: learning that, especially being into these big age You know
• 35:00
  Speaker 2: what I'm saying, this big age when you hit thirty,
• 35:04
  Speaker 2: perspectives start to be a little different. You know what
• 35:07
  Speaker 2: I'm saying. It hurts and it's uncomfortable navigating through it.
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: But it's so needy because now I think about the
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: woman that I am now And as you were saying,
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: like God has given us the responsibility of influence, right,
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: you have a huge responsibility of influence. What does it
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: look like for you to be a you have hatred
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: in your heart or you have unforgiveness in your heart
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: and you trying to influence somebody else to do something.
• 35:34
  Speaker 4: And I just have to say this. I love my
• 35:37
  Speaker 4: mom and my dad.
• 35:38
  Speaker 5: I love them in a whole different way as an
• 35:40
  Speaker 5: adult I do, and I have a whole different level
• 35:43
  Speaker 5: of respect for them. Yeah, because at the end of
• 35:45
  Speaker 5: the day, when it's all said and done, my story
• 35:48
  Speaker 5: is my story, and it happened the way it happened,
• 35:50
  Speaker 5: but that has no impact on the relationship that I
• 35:52
  Speaker 5: have with them today, and especially my mom because she
• 35:55
  Speaker 5: always just been an angel, you know what I'm saying.
• 35:57
  Speaker 5: I always I was confused about my relationship Dad for
• 36:00
  Speaker 5: some you know, different erarors of my life.
• 36:03
  Speaker 4: And I think you go through that, men go through
• 36:05
  Speaker 4: that with that. But one thing that both of them
• 36:08
  Speaker 4: have been is consistent.
• 36:10
  Speaker 5: No matter what I thought it should have been as
• 36:13
  Speaker 5: far as like the relationship with my dad or whatever,
• 36:16
  Speaker 5: We've always been consistent as far as like him being
• 36:20
  Speaker 5: around and you know, us being together and things like that.
• 36:23
  Speaker 5: But I survived, you know, and I wasn't abused, I
• 36:28
  Speaker 5: wasn't hungry, you know, we weren't on the streets, so
• 36:33
  Speaker 5: everything was in my mind, I'm like, it was okay,
• 36:36
  Speaker 5: you know now, Is that the way I would have
• 36:38
  Speaker 5: done things? No, But that's why it's important for me
• 36:42
  Speaker 5: to heal myself so that I don't repeat those same mistakes.
• 36:46
  Speaker 4: Yeah, you know that I'm able to create a better
• 36:49
  Speaker 4: life of myself.
• 36:50
  Speaker 5: Like I always tell people, you know, I was with
• 36:53
  Speaker 5: my parents probably for like eight eight of course eighteen
• 36:56
  Speaker 5: years of my life.
• 36:56
  Speaker 4: Then I went out to college or whatever.
• 36:58
  Speaker 5: I'm like, well, for the next eighteen years, I'm going
• 37:00
  Speaker 5: to I get the opportunity to change the narrative and
• 37:05
  Speaker 5: make the next eighteen years look completely different than the
• 37:08
  Speaker 5: first eighteen years. Yeah, that's what's so beautiful about our lives.
• 37:11
  Speaker 5: We can we can write our own book, but in
• 37:15
  Speaker 5: such a different the way that we see it or
• 37:18
  Speaker 5: the way we feel like it should be written. And
• 37:20
  Speaker 5: of course things are not going to be perfect. Things
• 37:21
  Speaker 5: are going to happen. I've been through. I've been through things.
• 37:24
  Speaker 5: I'll talk about it in the book, but.
• 37:27
  Speaker 4: Here I am.
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: There you are. Do you want a family of your own?
• 37:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah? I don't want a kid. I would want a kid,
• 37:34
  Speaker 4: just one kid. Yeah, no more.
• 37:36
  Speaker 5: We can't do it because I always think about now
• 37:39
  Speaker 5: more than that, I've been thinking about that a lot
• 37:41
  Speaker 5: lately or whatever. And actually, to be quite honest with you,
• 37:44
  Speaker 5: I got friend I got freakings who who has not
• 37:47
  Speaker 5: been married, and.
• 37:48
  Speaker 4: They're like, hey, well you have a kid if we
• 37:53
  Speaker 4: I'm like, sure, it'll be a cute kid. I'm that.
• 37:57
  Speaker 4: I'm so but that's a that I'm not gonna.
• 38:03
  Speaker 2: But so you so you're getting offers out here.
• 38:06
  Speaker 4: I'm here.
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: No, I know you're sire. Like, okay, so.
• 38:12
  Speaker 5: A little were about to a little head of nine months,
• 38:19
  Speaker 5: but I think I'm I'm really really good with kids.
• 38:22
  Speaker 5: I'm just so chilled with kids, and think about kids
• 38:26
  Speaker 5: with me. Kids do not they don't play with me.
• 38:29
  Speaker 5: I don't even have to whoop them.
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: You just got that. You know that trend is going
• 38:33
  Speaker 2: around they say, Jessica on TikTok that's probably they just
• 38:39
  Speaker 2: need to say, hell hut with kids?
• 38:42
  Speaker 4: What's the trend? I'm the birthday.
• 38:45
  Speaker 2: Somebody said that to me a chick for later the
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: other day. I didn't understand. I didn't understand anything what
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: they were talking about. But now I get it. I
• 38:52
  Speaker 2: need to catch up. I need to catch up. Okay,
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: so we got two more. We got two more, so
• 38:59
  Speaker 2: we have no two and four. Okay, okay, Okay, this
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: one was so good. I felt like you was reading
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: my life. So this is actually chapter two, the Little
• 39:14
  Speaker 2: Boy who Paid Attention. And at the end of it,
• 39:17
  Speaker 2: you say, but the truth is, if I had to
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: describe the younger version of myself in one word, it
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: would be lost. Lost. Okay, hold up, because it almost
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: cried when I first read it. I feel like I'm
• 39:29
  Speaker 2: about to cry again. Caught up all right, Lost because
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: the world around me didn't match the world inside me,
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: Lost because my dreams didn't look like the dreams of
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: other boys. Lost because I didn't see a future that
• 39:44
  Speaker 2: looked anything like the one I live today. The ain't
• 39:49
  Speaker 2: gonna lie, I was, there's a race put it. I
• 39:51
  Speaker 2: felt like somebody was cutting onions when I was reading it,
• 39:54
  Speaker 2: because that touched me in a in a different way.
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: Can we can we go to the little boy that
• 39:59
  Speaker 2: fell lost? Like that word is simple, but it's so
• 40:05
  Speaker 2: it's a deep word. I can't I can't even put
• 40:07
  Speaker 2: language to how I felt reading that. How did you
• 40:10
  Speaker 2: feel writing that part?
• 40:13
  Speaker 4: God?
• 40:14
  Speaker 5: You know what, since I wrote the book, we proof
• 40:18
  Speaker 5: read and I haven't read it since it's it's literally
• 40:21
  Speaker 5: like one of those things where I understand what like
• 40:23
  Speaker 5: artists music artists say they write the music and they
• 40:26
  Speaker 5: don't listen to it again. That's kind of like one
• 40:28
  Speaker 5: of those things of me, because literally, I don't even
• 40:30
  Speaker 5: know if.
• 40:30
  Speaker 4: I have it in me to read read it. To
• 40:32
  Speaker 4: be honest, I was just that's so vulnerable for me.
• 40:35
  Speaker 4: That's and that's not typical for me, you know. So
• 40:40
  Speaker 4: when I say lost, I mean like I felt like
• 40:45
  Speaker 4: everybody around me like was so different.
• 40:48
  Speaker 5: You know, my family, my mom family is from like
• 40:51
  Speaker 5: Avondale Projects, my dad family is from the North Side, and.
• 40:56
  Speaker 4: Then there's me.
• 40:57
  Speaker 5: I was just unique as as like my mindset, and
• 41:03
  Speaker 5: I was always smart. I always make good grades, and
• 41:06
  Speaker 5: you know, just very much so like studious and artsy
• 41:13
  Speaker 5: a bit like I used to like to draw, I
• 41:15
  Speaker 5: used to watch TLC, I used to like to watch
• 41:18
  Speaker 5: building shows. Bob Vila Home Again was one of my
• 41:22
  Speaker 5: favorite shows. And so I was just so kind of
• 41:27
  Speaker 5: like quirky, innocing still hood because that's a side of me.
• 41:31
  Speaker 5: That's that's how I'm being raised up. But I'm also
• 41:35
  Speaker 5: very like I was very different from everybody else. I
• 41:39
  Speaker 5: wanted more, I thought, I thought differently, and so it
• 41:42
  Speaker 5: used to be a lot of friction when it came
• 41:44
  Speaker 5: to like my thoughts versus it could be my siblings
• 41:50
  Speaker 5: or other people's thoughts and how they felt about life
• 41:53
  Speaker 5: and how I felt about life and what I wanted
• 41:57
  Speaker 5: out of life. If I'm you know, speaking about my
• 42:02
  Speaker 5: good grades or accomplishments I made, I think I'm more
• 42:05
  Speaker 5: than somebody, and so that makes you lost at a point,
• 42:08
  Speaker 5: like you start to feel like And I'm not trying
• 42:11
  Speaker 5: to victimize myself because by no means were was my
• 42:14
  Speaker 5: family not proud of me?
• 42:15
  Speaker 4: Yeah, they was proud of me.
• 42:16
  Speaker 5: They've been proud of me at every stage in my life.
• 42:18
  Speaker 5: But that don't take away from how I feel. Because
• 42:21
  Speaker 5: I started to feel like the black sheet because I
• 42:22
  Speaker 5: didn't necessarily fit the mold of the dudes of my family,
• 42:26
  Speaker 5: because they got their pants sagging and stuff.
• 42:28
  Speaker 2: I don't.
• 42:28
  Speaker 5: I'm more prim proper, like just always like this. My
• 42:35
  Speaker 5: cousin she passed away when I was in a like
• 42:38
  Speaker 5: a junior in high school, but she told me her words.
• 42:40
  Speaker 5: I mean, she's like, you are a classic.
• 42:44
  Speaker 4: Classic. Yeah, they don't make them like you.
• 42:47
  Speaker 5: Those words have stuck on me so long throughout my
• 42:49
  Speaker 5: life because I realized that.
• 42:54
  Speaker 4: I am different.
• 42:55
  Speaker 3: But I'm.
• 42:57
  Speaker 5: I am an innovator and I am a generational curse breaker.
• 43:03
  Speaker 5: I'm the first grandchild in my on my mom's side
• 43:07
  Speaker 5: to graduate high school. I'm the first to go to
• 43:11
  Speaker 5: college and the first to graduate from college. I'm the
• 43:13
  Speaker 5: first and youngest to buy a home. I was so
• 43:19
  Speaker 5: so guess what me being lost was. It was all
• 43:23
  Speaker 5: a part of the plan because I was lost because
• 43:29
  Speaker 5: I was trying to figure out how to.
• 43:30
  Speaker 4: Help excuse me. That is okay, I forgot on here
• 43:37
  Speaker 4: with the church lady. No, that came out fancy. I
• 43:39
  Speaker 4: believed that out there, right, It's fine. No, I was
• 43:43
  Speaker 4: lost because I'm trying to figure out how to navigate this.
• 43:46
  Speaker 4: I don't have a GPAs. Yeah, y'all ain't giving me.
• 43:49
  Speaker 4: Y'all ain't even give me map quest.
• 43:50
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 43:51
  Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying, I'm.
• 43:52
  Speaker 5: Driving this vehicle and I don't know where to go
• 43:54
  Speaker 5: because nobody's nobody has shown me the role to take.
• 43:58
  Speaker 5: So I'm having to literally pay this role myself, you
• 44:02
  Speaker 5: know what I'm saying. That's why I was like, you
• 44:05
  Speaker 5: know what I'm saying, Like, that's why I had nobody
• 44:08
  Speaker 5: to talk to about.
• 44:09
  Speaker 4: Well why do you like? All right, like, okay, so
• 44:11
  Speaker 4: what do you want.
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: To do with that?
• 44:14
  Speaker 4: Nobody care?
• 44:14
  Speaker 2: Yeah? I there, and then I can feel you. One
• 44:19
  Speaker 2: of the other words you used in here associated with
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: me and loss is misunderstood. And that's one word that
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: I kept I kept with myself. I just feel like
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: nobody understand me, like I can't put language to where
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: I'm going, what I'm doing, what I'm seeing, what I'm experiencing.
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: And so for for parents now, as millennials are parents right,
• 44:38
  Speaker 2: and they might have like a kid like you, whatever,
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: what language would you encourage them? How would you encourage
• 44:43
  Speaker 2: them to navigate a child that was like you?
• 44:46
  Speaker 5: One thing I would say is I do I respect
• 44:49
  Speaker 5: millennial parents. I really do, because a lot of millennial
• 44:52
  Speaker 5: parents are.
• 44:54
  Speaker 4: Open minded, yeah, way minded.
• 44:58
  Speaker 5: Way more so more more, allowing their kids to just
• 45:01
  Speaker 5: be exactly who they are. And so but my my
• 45:04
  Speaker 5: encouragement is to be just that.
• 45:06
  Speaker 4: Just let your kid be.
• 45:08
  Speaker 5: You know, everyone is not. Our kid is not, whether
• 45:11
  Speaker 5: it's a girl, boy, whatever the case may be. Nobody's
• 45:14
  Speaker 5: meant to be in this box and in this mold.
• 45:17
  Speaker 4: You know, let your kids be, Let them spread their
• 45:20
  Speaker 4: wings and fly and whatever it is that they want
• 45:23
  Speaker 4: that they want to do.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that. I think that's so important. I
• 45:26
  Speaker 2: love seeing my sister, my sister Kendle, she has three
• 45:30
  Speaker 2: little kids and all of them different, all of them
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: are different. Baby Creed is actually her special baby. He
• 45:42
  Speaker 2: has autism, but he is so dog gone smart, like
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: so smart, and he just started kind of like playing basketball,
• 45:49
  Speaker 2: but he doesn't know if you want to do like
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: he was just but he's just trying to figure out
• 45:53
  Speaker 2: what I'm doing. So it's interesting to come from the
• 45:56
  Speaker 2: same households where my daddy told me I couldn't be
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: a cheerleader because cheerleaders were tools. Oh yeah, you old
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: school like luder, my daddy down had to play basketball
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: because I needed to do something right. So we come
• 46:13
  Speaker 2: from that generation of thinking to, hey, what do you
• 46:16
  Speaker 2: want to do? What makes you happy? And then also
• 46:20
  Speaker 2: I feel like it's going to change the dynamic and
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: what people going to go to therapy for. Like, I
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: really feel like it's going to change the dynamic we
• 46:27
  Speaker 2: seen on somebody count trying to heal that little boy,
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: little girl or whatever for things that we experience as
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: parental That was covered as parental guidance, but really you
• 46:36
  Speaker 2: were you were trying to dictate my identity. You were,
• 46:44
  Speaker 2: and that's and that's dangerous. So i'm i'm, I'm. I
• 46:47
  Speaker 2: like the shout out to the millennial parents, y'all out
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: here eating down because auntie and uncle we love we
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: love kids. Did you hear him? Just call me the church, lady,
• 46:57
  Speaker 2: I go now, you folks, take your word.
• 47:08
  Speaker 4: I forgot that.
• 47:09
  Speaker 2: It's okay. I can be the church later. I'm a
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: cute church later than eat damn. All right, so let's
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: get into far Oh. I loved this. I love this. Okay.
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: What I'm gonna do is get this is a perfect ended. Lord,
• 47:23
  Speaker 2: you know what you're doing. I want you to read
• 47:27
  Speaker 2: the author's no out loud.
• 47:30
  Speaker 4: I want you to read.
• 47:32
  Speaker 2: And this is my book. That's my book that I bought.
• 47:35
  Speaker 2: I bought that book. Okay.
• 47:41
  Speaker 5: There are stories we live through, and then there are
• 47:43
  Speaker 5: stories we finally learned to tell. This book is both
• 47:46
  Speaker 5: for me bloom when you're planning then to start as
• 47:49
  Speaker 5: a message. It started as survived as a survival strategy.
• 47:53
  Speaker 5: It was something I learned by accident, by living through
• 47:55
  Speaker 5: moments that tried to break me, shake me, humble me,
• 47:58
  Speaker 5: and grow me all at the same I wrote this
• 48:01
  Speaker 5: book for anybody who has ever felt overlooked, underestimated, misunderstood
• 48:05
  Speaker 5: two different or too scared to believe in their ownbecoming.
• 48:09
  Speaker 4: This isn't a perfect story. It's an honest one.
• 48:12
  Speaker 5: It's the truth of a boy who paid attention a
• 48:14
  Speaker 5: teenager who held on, a young man who struggled in silence,
• 48:17
  Speaker 5: and a grown man who found purpose in the very
• 48:20
  Speaker 5: soul he once wanted to escape. If you're reading this,
• 48:24
  Speaker 5: I hope you feel seen. I hope you feel encouraged,
• 48:27
  Speaker 5: and I hope at some point in these pages you
• 48:29
  Speaker 5: realize you've been blooming too, and maybe without even knowing it.
• 48:32
  Speaker 5: This book was written with love from Birmingham to the world.
• 48:36
  Speaker 5: Ladarius L.
• 48:37
  Speaker 4: Hutcherson.
• 48:44
  Speaker 2: No, there was a bar in now that you said,
• 48:49
  Speaker 2: not me a rapper. No, you had several bars. I'm
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: just underlying every bar you said. It started by accident.
• 48:58
  Speaker 2: It started by accident.
• 49:00
  Speaker 4: With the bloom, with the blooming.
• 49:02
  Speaker 2: And when you think about things that have started by accident,
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: you accidentally, you know, even thinking about the Bloom energy
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: drink like all got this email. I'm just gonna try.
• 49:13
  Speaker 2: I think that's so important to to settle in that
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: you didn't you didn't ask for the limelight. You just
• 49:22
  Speaker 2: knew it was there and you stepped into it. And
• 49:25
  Speaker 2: so I think people, really, I don't know, I think
• 49:29
  Speaker 2: that part the whole. Let me make sure I'm reading
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: I'm saying this right, because I don't you know how
• 49:35
  Speaker 2: you'd be trying to say what people be saying, and
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: then it don't hit like that. So I gotta go
• 49:41
  Speaker 2: back to the to the word, the word.
• 49:45
  Speaker 4: The Saints gonna get me for saying that.
• 49:47
  Speaker 2: It's okay, calm down, you said, let me say, let
• 49:52
  Speaker 2: me let me say. It was something wait bloom where
• 49:55
  Speaker 2: you playing. It didn't start as a message. It started
• 49:57
  Speaker 2: as a survival strategy. It was something I learned by accident,
• 50:01
  Speaker 2: by living through moments that tried to break me, shape me,
• 50:04
  Speaker 2: humble me, and grow me all at the same time.
• 50:10
  Speaker 2: I think that the biggest part was that you went
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: from survival to strategy, and some of us have gotten
• 50:19
  Speaker 2: stuck in survival mold, and your mind has shifted to
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: I'm gonna I can't stay in survival mode because I'll
• 50:28
  Speaker 2: still act like the survivor. But now you're the overcomer.
• 50:32
  Speaker 2: Now you're the person that has deemed yourself Well, let
• 50:37
  Speaker 2: me ask you that, let me not assume it. Have
• 50:40
  Speaker 2: you deemed yourself worthy for what you've been entering into.
• 50:45
  Speaker 4: Yeah? Now more than ever.
• 50:48
  Speaker 5: But you know, I think we all have dealt with
• 50:52
  Speaker 5: some imposters syn drawn at some point or another. But yes,
• 50:56
  Speaker 5: I feel like, at this point, I'm allowing myself to
• 51:01
  Speaker 5: embrace all the things, you know, walk into rooms and
• 51:06
  Speaker 5: walking through doors and feel like I belong.
• 51:08
  Speaker 4: There because I do.
• 51:10
  Speaker 5: You know, before I'm just like, but now I know
• 51:15
  Speaker 5: that the way people see me, and you know, like
• 51:19
  Speaker 5: I said, I've at this point, I've been vulnerable and
• 51:25
  Speaker 5: so yeah, I do now.
• 51:28
  Speaker 4: M hm.
• 51:29
  Speaker 2: So we got the book, and you've been promoting the
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: heck out of this book. You've been I say, this
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: is the this is the only run to boom bloomware.
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: You're paying it? What what comes after this?
• 51:46
  Speaker 4: After the book? Its just in general, just the book.
• 51:56
  Speaker 2: Just in general? What is it? Because this was this
• 51:58
  Speaker 2: was big? Though, this was huge.
• 52:00
  Speaker 5: I know, I got a lot of goals. I honestly do. Like,
• 52:05
  Speaker 5: I got brands within my brand that I want to
• 52:09
  Speaker 5: start and partnerships that I definitely want to make happen
• 52:14
  Speaker 5: or whatever. And I'm not gonna stop until the do
• 52:17
  Speaker 5: and just I'm gonna be doing a lot, lot, lot,
• 52:21
  Speaker 5: lot lot more hosting and so that's what I'm I
• 52:24
  Speaker 5: love that too because I used to be so scared
• 52:26
  Speaker 5: of stay.
• 52:27
  Speaker 4: Yeah, but head x Alabama.
• 52:29
  Speaker 5: Yeah, changed my whole perspective on that I'm like, wait,
• 52:33
  Speaker 5: if I can get up here and I can memorize
• 52:35
  Speaker 5: seven minutes worth of material.
• 52:37
  Speaker 4: I can I can do it. I can do this.
• 52:39
  Speaker 4: That's you know, because that was the hardest that.
• 52:41
  Speaker 2: That was the hardest part. I'm worried about that.
• 52:45
  Speaker 4: We'll talk about it and I even introduce you to
• 52:49
  Speaker 4: somebody that helped me if you need that. But yeah,
• 52:55
  Speaker 4: so just.
• 52:57
  Speaker 5: It's so many different opportunities that's coming up from me
• 53:00
  Speaker 5: just that I like, wait a minute, you know, because
• 53:04
  Speaker 5: like I'm gonna be hosting up Minority Business Awards, which
• 53:06
  Speaker 5: is happened in May twenty first.
• 53:07
  Speaker 4: At the club.
• 53:09
  Speaker 5: But when I look back at previous years, I'm like, wait,
• 53:12
  Speaker 5: this is host Ricky Smiley hosted it in twenty twenty three.
• 53:19
  Speaker 4: I forgot the name. They host a radio show. What's
• 53:24
  Speaker 4: her name?
• 53:25
  Speaker 2: Is it?
• 53:25
  Speaker 5: Laura Styles? I forgot the name. It's like a nine
• 53:28
  Speaker 5: eighty five seven jams and on the book while.
• 53:30
  Speaker 4: Like they've had some.
• 53:32
  Speaker 5: Very notable Roilwood juniors, yeah, you know, and I'm like, ell, hut,
• 53:40
  Speaker 5: it's the house this shit.
• 53:41
  Speaker 4: I'm like, what is happened? What is going on?
• 53:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 53:44
  Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like what is happening for real,
• 53:48
  Speaker 5: Like I'm just I don't know. Yeah, I'll be trying
• 53:52
  Speaker 5: to figure it out. But but I that I don't
• 53:54
  Speaker 5: feel like I deserved that.
• 53:55
  Speaker 4: But I'm like, wow, I'm really I'm really like this
• 53:59
  Speaker 4: is really happening.
• 54:00
  Speaker 2: Like you're pitching yourself.
• 54:02
  Speaker 5: Yeah, like because when you started doing content, it's just
• 54:05
  Speaker 5: throwing out at something like I never thought I never
• 54:07
  Speaker 5: could have had them. I wouldn't have thought like And
• 54:11
  Speaker 5: Minority Business Awards is such a prestigious event and it's
• 54:15
  Speaker 5: been around for so many years. It's put on by
• 54:17
  Speaker 5: Summing Media and they have you know, of course ninety
• 54:21
  Speaker 5: five seven jams on day seven jams, but some of
• 54:24
  Speaker 5: the they have some of the most amazing sponsors and
• 54:27
  Speaker 5: just this is.
• 54:27
  Speaker 4: A big deal, m you know, and to have that
• 54:31
  Speaker 4: in my hands.
• 54:33
  Speaker 5: And then I'm hosting a Furnish chicken festival. This is
• 54:35
  Speaker 5: my first time hosting a festival. They're expecting over two
• 54:38
  Speaker 5: thousand people and so I'm.
• 54:40
  Speaker 2: Just like, you know, so it's just it's kind of
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: like surreal. Yeah, like you're doing more than what you
• 54:48
  Speaker 2: intend to do. And I and with something one of
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: my mentors, David Shan's he's seven figure podcaster. He this
• 54:59
  Speaker 2: is one of his untruth He says, consistency is the
• 55:02
  Speaker 2: only cheat code people try to get around doing what
• 55:06
  Speaker 2: you need to do, be like showing up, being visible,
• 55:09
  Speaker 2: figuring out. I'm laughing, y'all because he just said this,
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: like several times off caramel and paying your paying your dues,
• 55:21
  Speaker 2: looks like I just.
• 55:23
  Speaker 4: Want to say this. I just want to say this. Recently,
• 55:35
  Speaker 4: there's been a.
• 55:37
  Speaker 5: Trend happening when I'm a part of events or when
• 55:42
  Speaker 5: I have something going on, it seems to be a
• 55:44
  Speaker 5: thing where people like to go and insert themselves and said.
• 55:49
  Speaker 4: Event and reach out to the creator of the event
• 55:54
  Speaker 4: and say, hey, I see he's a part of the event.
• 55:57
  Speaker 4: How can I be a part of it?
• 56:01
  Speaker 5: And I'm like, well, you can be a part of
• 56:05
  Speaker 5: if they had reached out to you to be a
• 56:06
  Speaker 5: part of it, or you can just continue to create
• 56:09
  Speaker 5: your content and pay your dues and then you know
• 56:12
  Speaker 5: they'll have your part of events. Why are we forcing
• 56:15
  Speaker 5: ourselves into I mean, I know I ain't saying nothing
• 56:17
  Speaker 5: that's wrong with opportunity or trying to get opportunities or whatever,
• 56:22
  Speaker 5: But what I feel though, is that I paid my dues.
• 56:26
  Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. And I ain't never been
• 56:28
  Speaker 4: one to I don't know.
• 56:31
  Speaker 5: I just feel like for me, I just some people
• 56:37
  Speaker 5: want to skip the working part and they just think
• 56:40
  Speaker 5: that because they have like maybe a few Viur videos,
• 56:43
  Speaker 5: that that's enough for them to I guess, add value
• 56:50
  Speaker 5: to something or whatever. So when I say pay your dues,
• 56:53
  Speaker 5: that's just been on my heart lately, heavy lately, you know.
• 56:57
  Speaker 5: So my advice to people and they even when they
• 56:58
  Speaker 5: reach out to me as influence, was my last missage
• 57:01
  Speaker 5: to them is always.
• 57:04
  Speaker 2: That's so good. You know you brought up You just
• 57:06
  Speaker 2: brought up something and I haven't thought about it. I
• 57:08
  Speaker 2: thought about in a while. I had started and that's
• 57:14
  Speaker 2: why I took it. When you call me the church girl,
• 57:17
  Speaker 2: but it's it's okay. So I feel like I'm having
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: a moment with you right now. I'm just gonna have it.
• 57:22
  Speaker 4: Okay.
• 57:25
  Speaker 2: So I was in school and I was with some
• 57:28
  Speaker 2: people I'm just gonna say people, and one of the
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: things that was brought up was that all I'm only
• 57:35
  Speaker 2: around for a prayer and like a promote. I think
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: it was a prayer re quest and a promotion, like
• 57:42
  Speaker 2: if I was promoting something or I'm here for a
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: prayer request or to pray or whatever, and I had
• 57:49
  Speaker 2: a moment where I had to just kind of realize
• 57:54
  Speaker 2: that's that's part of who I am. And it's interesting
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: that I have this platform and i've sometimes I have
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: I am trying to I don't know what it is
• 58:04
  Speaker 2: about you that just makes me want to cry today.
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: I try not to get stuck in like the the
• 58:15
  Speaker 2: opinions because I am growing in this space and then
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: being more visible, being visible to people like you, visible
• 58:25
  Speaker 2: to me even like Miss tab or whatever. To not
• 58:28
  Speaker 2: look like I'm chasing anything outside of what God has
• 58:32
  Speaker 2: told me to do. That has probably been the most
• 58:38
  Speaker 2: mm hmm. That's probably been the most frustrating and heartbreaking
• 58:54
  Speaker 2: thing to go through and navigate. So when people like
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: you Jesus come and just thank you Jesus, When people
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: like you come and say I want to be a
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: part of what you're doing. I see what you're doing,
• 59:16
  Speaker 2: I want to help you. Where you see yourself, I
• 59:19
  Speaker 2: can see it too, it just does something to me.
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: And that's why anytime you ask me just gotta need
• 59:26
  Speaker 2: to come on, or you like have a revolving door,
• 59:29
  Speaker 2: just because not just how you make me feel, but
• 59:32
  Speaker 2: because people need to hear that because it's so many opportunities.
• 59:38
  Speaker 2: It's more opportunities where people try to push you down
• 59:41
  Speaker 2: then hold you up. And I just feel like I
• 59:45
  Speaker 2: met you at the right time. I really, I really did.
• 59:48
  Speaker 2: I didn't know I was gonna say that. I didn't
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: know I was gonna get emotional either.
• 59:51
  Speaker 5: Man, Like, no, I see what you're doing, but no,
• 59:56
  Speaker 5: I think that that's a part of the message that
• 59:59
  Speaker 5: I'm I'm trying to like say, like when I say,
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 5: pay your dudes, regardless of what you feel like people think,
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 5: or what people actually may think or whatever. God has
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 5: aligned you, you know, and he physicianed you. And I
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 5: don't feel like things happen by mistake. I feel like
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 5: they are ordained. They these things were gonna already happen
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 5: for you before you were even here, you know. So
• 1:00:27
  Speaker 5: don't allow yourself to feel any remorse or regret for
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 5: where God has you at in your life and the
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 5: people that he's aligning you with, because you're exactly where
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 5: you're supposed to be.
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 4: You really are.
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 2: Thank you. I did not know. I was like dog God,
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: we was laughing out that's the right girl, what's there?
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: You still here? Yes, I am here in the center
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 2: of it all. I'm here in the middle. But no,
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: so I had to go get some paper kept my
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: pain because, like as you guys were having conversations, just
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 2: different thoughts and things were coming up, and if I
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: don't write them down or capture them, sometimes I'll lose them.
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 2: But what I loved about this particular conversation, what I
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 2: was getting from it, and just kind of as I've
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: gotten to hear your story and your journey is I
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 2: love the confidence that that I feel like you've always
• 1:01:28
  Speaker 2: kind of had in a sense, right, even though there's
• 1:01:31
  Speaker 2: been kind of like growing up, there were moments where
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 2: you wasn't quite sure of where you fed fit in right.
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 2: And I think it's so beautiful because, like you was
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 2: telling Jessica, we when when the Lord is like, hey,
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 2: I need a Of course Ladarius probably wasn't your name
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 2: in heaven, but he's like, hey, I need just shying
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 2: to start right here in the earth at this time, right.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: So with saying that, he doesn't necessarily say hey, I
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 2: want sometimes our not sometimes our parents are just the
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 2: tools in a sense, my tools to get us here, right,
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: into the to the natural space. But he has already
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: placed in us everything that we need for the purpose
• 1:02:20
  Speaker 2: that he's put us here on the earth. The issue
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 2: is we're born into natural families, you know what I'm saying.
• 1:02:27
  Speaker 2: We're born into natural families who people themselves are still
• 1:02:31
  Speaker 2: trying to figure out their selves and their lives. And
• 1:02:34
  Speaker 2: because sometimes there's different errors when they say you were
• 1:02:37
  Speaker 2: put in this earth for a certain time, is this
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 2: like you think about like my grandparents, like the error
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 2: that they lived in, the things they had to go through,
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 2: the things that they needed to survive, is completely different
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 2: from where we are today and the things that we
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 2: need in order to survive in this world. And so
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 2: I just love that even through you trying to figure
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 2: things out, as you've grown, you found your voice, you
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 2: found your space, you found your place. And the other
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 2: thing that came up the reason why I wrote this down,
• 1:03:05
  Speaker 2: and I had sorry I missed the angle. I missed
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 2: the angle because I was researching. Okay, So as you
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 2: were talking, I saw a river they's just talking about.
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 2: I saw a river, and in seeing the river, I
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 2: saw like these little branches that come off of rivers.
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 2: They're like streams, right so streams happen when there's sometimes
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 2: no space for the river to keep going, so it
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 2: needs to kind of break through. And what the stream
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: does is it provides water to spaces that wouldn't have
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 2: necessarily had the opportunity to get that water if it
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 2: had branched off. So that looks like us being confident
• 1:03:46
  Speaker 2: and standing in the purpose that God has us, because yes,
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 2: we have a family that we were born into. But
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 2: also and He's put us on this earth for a reason,
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 2: and it's our responsibility to tap in and do that thing.
• 1:03:59
  Speaker 2: Right when when we do that thing, when we keep
• 1:04:02
  Speaker 2: God first, things happen. Like you said, I don't know,
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 2: things just keep happening. Why Because Ladaris has owned his authenticity,
• 1:04:10
  Speaker 2: he also keeps God first in everything that he does,
• 1:04:13
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying. And so because of that,
• 1:04:14
  Speaker 2: the scripture says that as you delighten him, he will
• 1:04:17
  Speaker 2: give you the desires of his heart. And the truth is,
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 2: the desires of your heart is really the desires that
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 2: He had for you from the beginning, you know. And
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 2: so I just love this conversation because it was just
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 2: it's just a reminder that we all have something to
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 2: do on this earth, and we have to step into
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 2: that thing wholeheartedly, unapologetically, and as we do. So, yes,
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 2: people are gonna talk or whatever, but nine times out
• 1:04:42
  Speaker 2: of ten, the people that are talking are the ones
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 2: that have not found their spaces yet, you know. And
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 2: so I just appreciate it. And for me just watching you,
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 2: listening to you, it's just been very inspiring just to
• 1:04:54
  Speaker 2: kind of continue to hear your journey and your story.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 2: So thank you again for sharing that. So I got
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 2: my papers in my notes things. Appreciate you're talking about
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 2: I'm the church good, but you just came here and preach. No,
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 2: there's a rate, and there's a rate. Got her hold
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 2: all her notes. You can split the screen, but she
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 2: got all her notes. You didn't, wouldn't got out paper girl,
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 2: I was talking about to him.
• 1:05:22
  Speaker 4: No, y'all, I'm.
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 5: I'm in a different season, and I'm I'm just in
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 5: a season of gratitude and that. I appreciate those words,
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 5: because sometimes you just need to hear that, you know,
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 5: And so I definitely appreciate that. And I honestly don't
• 1:05:40
  Speaker 5: even sometimes understand how many people that are inspired by
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 5: by me. You know, it's not until I'm out like
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 5: really out with people. That's why I say it's so
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 5: important to get out and just people. Yeah, because every
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 5: time I go somewhere, and no matter where I'm at,
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 5: I don't care, it could be a club, people are gonna.
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 4: Come up to me and tell me how much that
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 4: I inspire.
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 5: Now how much they I watch your journey, I watch
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 5: it from them again and like it's just it's crazy.
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So you already know what time it is, lads,
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 2: I know there, what time is it? It's time for
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 2: you to leave us with your final thoughts. If you
• 1:06:20
  Speaker 2: if they didn't hear anything else you said today, and
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 2: even if you came in here with something that you
• 1:06:25
  Speaker 2: just like, I just want to say this and lead
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 2: this the people with this before it's yours, it's your time.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 4: I just want to say I'm grateful. You know, I
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 4: am here. You know, I have literally realized that I'm
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 4: here and I'm in my I'm walking in my moment.
• 1:06:44
  Speaker 2: You know.
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 4: Every time I.
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 5: Think that it's God as good as it can get,
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 5: God shows me more, you know, And that's I think
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 5: what's so beautiful about my journey because at every turn
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 5: I'm just like, Wow, God, thank you, because I'm not
• 1:07:00
  Speaker 5: expecting this. I don't walk around with this expectation of
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 5: what things should be for me, or how people should
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 5: treat me, or how when I go places, should they
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 5: roll out the red car for me. I don't know
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 5: if that'll ever be me, because I'm just not the
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 5: type of a guy, you know, I've always been in
• 1:07:15
  Speaker 5: my therapy to tell me, I've always been overly independent.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 5: I've never depended on anybody for anything. But I think
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 5: that's gonna make it so beautiful, though, because what I'm
• 1:07:23
  Speaker 5: learning to do is just embrace and be okay with,
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 5: you know, things happening for me, and people doing things
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 5: for me, and people like showing their appreciation to me
• 1:07:33
  Speaker 5: for what I do for the community, you know, and
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 5: considering myself a community leader now or a community builder
• 1:07:40
  Speaker 5: rather because I'm helping build a community and so now
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 5: I can say that I'm Ill Hout, a ted X speaker,
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 5: an author, an influencer, and a community builder, and for me,
• 1:07:54
  Speaker 5: that just sounds so beautiful, you know. But I'm also
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 5: a person that loves my family of my friends, I
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 5: love my associates, and even people that are I considered
• 1:08:07
  Speaker 5: to be like coworkers other influencers that I don't necessarily
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 5: we're not necessarily friends, but I respect what they do,
• 1:08:12
  Speaker 5: you know, and so it's just it's just a beautiful,
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 5: beautiful time right now, and I'm just excited to see
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 5: what God.
• 1:08:20
  Speaker 4: Has in stuff for me next.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 2: Awesome. Well, I'm excited to see what.
• 1:08:26
  Speaker 4: I was supposed to leave them with a word.
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but but it was that was on your heart,
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 2: that was he said, give it back, running back.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 5: Now we can still use that, but the word I
• 1:08:38
  Speaker 5: look at them to say the word that I would Okay,
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 5: Oh this is gonna.
• 1:08:45
  Speaker 2: Be No, it's gonna be amazing.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 4: Oh my god, they gonna say he has so this functional.
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 5: Okay, So I just want to say this, whatever it
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 5: is that you aspire to be, whatever it is that
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 5: you have in your heart, just do it. I know
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 5: it sounds so cliche, but you cannot be fearful and
• 1:09:13
  Speaker 5: be successful. Those two things just don't.
• 1:09:15
  Speaker 4: They don't. They don't work together. You have to literally
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 4: just you know, put yourself out there and do it.
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 5: Like honestly, I picked up my camera in twenty twenty
• 1:09:24
  Speaker 5: two and I started recording these restaurants.
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 4: Camera was shaky, quality was horrible.
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 5: Everything was just bad. When I go back and look
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 5: at our cringe. But that's the beauty of it because
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 5: I have come such.
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 4: A long way.
• 1:09:39
  Speaker 5: So don't worry about what you have or don't have.
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 5: Just start, you know, whatever it is that you want
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 5: to do. I don't care if it's nails, hair, barbering, whatever.
• 1:09:48
  Speaker 4: The case may be. Just start, and you know God will,
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 4: He'll definitely lead the way.
• 1:09:56
  Speaker 2: I love it. Ladarious, ill Hook as they call you,
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 2: thank you. I really love you, I really appreciate you.
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 2: I value you. The Ladarius Ladarius. That's why I call
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 2: him Ladarius. I don't be saying ill because I love Ladarius,
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: but thank you so much for always coming here. You
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 2: know you have an open door and here it just
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: asks the podcast does a ray. It's another one. Listen
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 2: to you, guys. If this touched you anyway, I want
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 2: to hear it in the comments. I want to see it.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 2: Y'all been listening, y'all been talking to them comings and
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 2: we appreciate it. Also, if you don't have a community,
• 1:10:35
  Speaker 2: why not join the safe space nineteen dollars a month
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 2: to me every week with us. You should you should
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 2: be in the community. We're stretching you, we're molding each other.
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 2: We're growing together. It's a safe space for real where
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 2: transparency means transformation. And so until next week, until next time,
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: remember life could be much more simple if you just
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 2: ask thank you for tuning in to this week's episode.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 1: Since you've made it this far, you might as well
• 1:11:09
  Speaker 1: connect with us on all social media platforms at d
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: Jessica S.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 2: Smith.
• 1:11:14
  Speaker 1: I know I won't see you back until next week,
• 1:11:17
  Speaker 1: but until then, remember to love always yourself and always thank.
• 1:11:24
  Speaker 3: Thank God for one another day. Hey, hey, I know
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 3: we could be another way. Hey, pray thank God for
• 1:11:35
  Speaker 3: another day. Hey hey, I'm just thankful another day. Hey
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 3: hey another day? Oh, another day wise, another day to
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 3: get it right, another day to rise up, another day living,
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 3: another day.
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 2: We love ones.
• 1:11:53
  Speaker 4: I always remember hold it down for a ball one
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 4: yuh