Latest / Soul Salon with Ayandastood / The #1 Block for Big Dreamers isn't What You Think.

Transcript

The #1 Block for Big Dreamers isn't What You Think. · Soul Salon with Ayandastood

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You are about to give yourself more permission than you have ever given yourself to express,
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to try, to show up imperfectly, to take up space in a way that you have been conditioned out of
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since childhood.
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I like to think of permission as like a circle.
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There is a circle surrounding
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each and every one of us and from a very young age we have been conditioned to keep this circle
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oppressively small.
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Why?
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Because of course society benefits from us shrinking ourselves and taking up
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less space than life itself feels called to take up.
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When you look at a tree or a plant it's always
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stretching out to the sun, stretching towards the possibility of expansion and like all of life we
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have an inherent desire and need to expand and so you have been feeling called to step into that
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next level of expansion maybe take up more space start a creative project or return to a creative
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identity that maybe you felt you claimed in childhood or in adolescence but you lost touch
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with or let go of with time because of social pressure because of capitalism because of the
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unfolding of time and now you are inviting yourself to reclaim and return to who you know you already
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are in that reclamation and in that return you are being invited to give yourself juicy expansive
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generous permission to not show up perfectly to not have to have all the answers to not have to
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have a 10-step plan before you allow yourself to start or take that sacred first step permission to
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explore to try to adventure permission to forgive yourself and to not approach this new journey this
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new adventure with a sense of already always being not good enough.
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Permission to celebrate your
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every step as though it is a Grammy moment.
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Something that I am always trying to give myself
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more permission for is to show up imperfectly.
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I have a lot of childhood messaging and conditioning
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the schools I went to and the family I grew up in in terms of needing to be perfect and needing to
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have everything just perfect in order for me to be able to show up and as a creative and as an
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artist an identity that I've worked to be able to claim for myself and we are all artists and more
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and more of us are stepping into our artistic identity which again by design society doesn't
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want us stepping out of the circle by necessity artists live outside of that circle so do queer
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people so do black people so do disabled people so society will always try to repress people who
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sprawl out of so do women and so do many of us who just see the world in a way that is rooted in
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softness in love in connection not rooted in growth at all costs or in capitalism or supremacy
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or hierarchy so whenever we color outside of these lines whenever we try to stretch beyond
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the repressive conditioning that society has given us there's going to be a message that we
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are unsafe and our nervous system is going to interpret this as being unsafe.
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So as you expand
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this circle, give yourself permission to do so in a way that may not always feel perfect, in a way
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that could be messy, in a way that goes against everything you've been told you're allowed to be
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and know that as you expand that circle, you bring so many people around you with you because we have
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all felt the infectiousness, the contagion in a beautiful way of permission.
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When you see someone
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giving themselves permission to show up imperfectly or to express or to be seen not only in their
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perfections or in their accolades or in their highest moments but to be seen in their vulnerability
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to be seen in their divine imperfection to be seen in their sacred humanity it gives you permission
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to feel like wow if they're doing it if she's allowing herself to express in that way if he is
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being so generous as to allow himself to be seen in a moment that society tells you you should be
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hiding, maybe I get to do that as well.
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So these circles are not individual circles that we each
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live in.
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There's also collective circles.
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And there are some people who are the boundary pushers,
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who push out the collective permission circle and allow us all to expand, allow us all to take up
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more space.
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And if you're watching this video, you are a cycle breaker for the collective.
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By you
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giving yourself permission, there are people who are going to absorb that permission and freedom
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from you and through you.
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You are here as someone who is a liberator, a path-shower, a way-finder.
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So trust that you are meant to have ripple effects on the collective that you cannot even imagine or
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conceive.
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And what that is asking you to do currently is to ask yourself, what am I being
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invited to give myself more permission to experience?
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Something that I feel that just
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dropped in is infinite worthiness.
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When we give ourselves permission to see ourselves and each
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other as unconditionally, infinitely worthy, then we don't always feel like we are being subjected
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to even our own conditional love.
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Conditional love says, if you do this right, if you do this well,
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if you do this in a way that is externally validated, then I'll be proud of you, then I'll
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love you.
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Unconditional love is beyond any outcome or result.
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It is saying, I'm always on your side.
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Give yourself permission to always unconditionally be on your own side.
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Give yourself permission to be proud of your efforts,
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even if there's no external visible result or achievement that other people might celebrate you for.
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You know, I've been going through a period on YouTube where my views are very low
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and I'm giving myself permission to show up still and to not allow humiliation
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or the fear of being seen as a failure or even by myself as stopping me from sharing my voice.
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I'm also giving myself permission to not have to share something groundbreaking in order to be able to share.
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You know, you've heard the message, give yourself permission before,
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but there can be this desire as a creative, as an artist, as a speaker, as a writer,
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to say something that's never been said before or never quite been said in the same way.
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as people who desire and love creativity we can also then hold ourselves to standards that then
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actually limit our own creativity because when we think about it what we are lacking is not
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information we live in the information economy and age what we're lacking is wisdom what we're
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lacking is love and so if you have a loving thing to write say express there can never be enough
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people speaking in a loving way there can never be enough people homing in the same messages of love
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one of the central tenets of wisdom in all wisdom faiths and traditions it goes across hinduism
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islam christianity many different indigenous forms of relating to one another is the idea of
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treating others as you would treat yourself this is ancient wisdom this is universal wisdom and yet
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do you look around do you see that happening so does that mean we should only say the most novel
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thing ever or actually are the most fundamental principles words we've all heard before and yet
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haven't fully embodied haven't fully stepped into so I know you know intellectually my mind is like
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I know I need to give myself permission am I am I giving myself permission to show up imperfectly
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am I giving myself permission to go through ebbs and flows with the visible aspects of my work and
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the views and the likes and all those things am I giving myself permission to have dips you know
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and to not measure my worth as a creative in this algorithmic sense of these platforms am I also
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giving myself permission to own the desire that many of us have to resonate to create work that
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resonates and therefore to feel like when we go through these dips are my highs as an artist
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behind me have I already created my best work you know what I mean so I'm giving myself permission
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and now I'm giving myself permission to be seen in my vulnerability to be seen in the tension
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between yes I want to not be driven by these external measures of success but also I once
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said this to a coaching client it is so human to want to resonate and to want to also succeed
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in the language that you've been given of success by the society that you live in and in this world
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of visibility that language is well who's watching how many people are watching you know and your
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worth can become tied to these numbers which I really work so hard to not make the case but also
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I'm human and also sometimes my ego and my soul are in a dance and one wants one thing and the
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other wants the other and I try to integrate both where is that centerpiece where ego and soul meet
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the integration of all these parts of me and for me that is expression expression sometimes I'm
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like words you know the mouth even so what are you being invited to expand that circle of permission
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for so that you walk around giving yourself more space and notice that everyone has a circle of
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permission there's a volume of voice that some people will just never use there's gestures that
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some people will just never reach out and do because we're taught to shrink.
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There are allowances,
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you know, have you noticed some people in public spaces are very good at speaking to strangers
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or being vulnerable, offering a question or a word and other people don't give themselves
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permission to do that.
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And so what does that person then do by being the inviter?
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They invite
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the person who doesn't give himself permission to speak to strangers to now suddenly feel like
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they get to speak to a stranger.
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So know that you play a very sacred role and that we are all here
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as liberators and liberation doesn't happen on a mass scale always.
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Often it's you show up in a way
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that sometimes makes your mom or your elders think differently or vice versa or you show up in a way
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that allows your cousins to be like oh my word that's possible.
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So know that you are here to play
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a divine role of expanding our possibilities but it starts with you.
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This is where the individual
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and the collective meet.
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Of course, we know these are intrinsically connected.
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We cannot separate
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them.
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But what I believe is like a collective understanding of purpose by you following what
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is your calling, following what is your purpose, following what is on your heart to follow.
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There's an intrinsic social component to it because you'll notice your purpose involves
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other people.
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Your purpose involves, if you want to sing, people in the crowd listening to you,
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people resonating with your music, feeling seen by your music.
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If you want to write,
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people reading your words and then editors and publishers like every single dream is a social
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dream framed as an individualistic dream so when you honor that calling within you trust that there
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are people who are here to come along on that journey with you to expand through you to grow
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with you as a vessel of their growth so what are you being invited yourself to give yourself
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permission to do be or experience to honor to reclaim to return to put your permission slip in
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the comments below and i would love to read us all uplifting each other giving each other and
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ourselves permission because when you see someone giving themselves more permission you cannot help
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but absorb like a plant absorbing you know by osmosis this feeling that oh wow i resonate with
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That resonates with me.
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I want to do that more.
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I want to allow myself to speak freely.
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I want to
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allow myself to make mistakes.
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I want to allow myself to show up even when I don't have something
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groundbreaking to say because I value my wisdom intrinsically.
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And I know that novelty is sort of
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this capitalist and patriarchal myth that actually everything we need to know, we on some level
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already do know.
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Love is the supreme gift.
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I just saw a book by Paulo Coelho on this.
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The supreme,
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there's no every other rule there's nothing more important he's writing in this book than love
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have we heard that before yes does that mean a book on it isn't is less divine because it's
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heard before no love is the ultimate teaching and yet none of us really i mean all of us
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even the most loving among us can always learn how to be more loving to ourselves and to others
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and to the earth because we would live in a different earth if we were all manifestations
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of the love that we are here to return to being.
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So go give yourself permission.
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Comment below if you feel called
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to give yourself permission and thereby others.
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This is a conversation that started within Soulcraft.
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This is a creative community for big dreamers
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to do the work of our dreams together.
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If you feel called, the link is below.
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I'm sending so much love and so much permission to you
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for all our recovering perfectionists,
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for all people who are trying to unlearn
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everything that represses oppresses and dims their light for anyone who refuses to be their own
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imprisoner because we're literally being made to self-monitor and be self-vigilant and
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to not be a liberating force towards ourselves why because that makes the system that much more
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effective because the easiest way to oppress people is to have them oppress themselves
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and for many of us it's both because of all the systems that are interlocking
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everyone is sort of oppressed by both but in very different ways i don't want to marginalize that at
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all but i just want to say give yourself permission in you giving yourself permission
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not only do you heal a sacred part of the planet which is you you also by instruction by
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demonstration by embodiment you help other people feel permission through you and give permission
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to themselves and to therefore others, thereby this ripple effect in the direction of love and
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liberation.
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I'm sending so much love to you.
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I hope this has served your deepest consciousness.
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It is a gift to say something not groundbreaking to you today.
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I feel so proud, so delighted,
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so overjoyed.
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What a juicy invitation to even be able to say that which does not break ground,
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because sometimes the ground just needs a little bit of a pat, a little bit of a step through,
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not a breaking you know what i mean not a huge you know impact doesn't have to be huge the
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smallest scale of impact matters and you matter and your permission giving and receiving matters
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so let this be your receiving of permission my gift to you is the invitation that you've already
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heard before which is divine to give yourself more permission i'm sending so much love and
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light to you and I will see you on the next soul session I'll have you bye my darling my love my
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soul sibling thank you for stepping into the soul salon if you are still hearing or watching this
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we are soul siblings we are resonating on the same frequency and so something you may struggle
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with that I struggle with is the fear of being seen you know that visibility is involved in you
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living your creative purpose and being in your power serving the collective through your gifts
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through your magic, through your medicine.
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In order to do that, you know you need to be more seen
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than you are allowing yourself to be right now.
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I have a gift just for you,
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heart made for us on this frequency.
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And it is a free ebook called
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The Soulful Visibility Guide.
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That is soulful visibility.
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Like we don't just wanna be seen, we wanna be felt.
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We wanna be heard.
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We wanna move and be moved.
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So I do have a free gift for you.
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And all you need to do is go to my website,
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I understood.com and there you will be able to input your email address and receive this directly
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to your inbox this is such a juicy and delicious guide and I change the free offering every few
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months so you know get it while you can all the links are in the show notes so thank you so much
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I love you and I will see you on the next soul session okay I love you bye