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Advice from Veteran Competitive Dance Parents · Making The Impact - A Dance Competition Podcast

• 0:07
  SPEAKER_01: Have you ever wondered what goes on behind the table at a dance competition?
• 0:10
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly what are the judges looking for anyway?
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_01: This is Making the Impact, a dance competition podcast.
• 0:15
  SPEAKER_01: Each week we'll cover a different topic related to the world of competitive dance from the perspective of the judges behind the table.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_01: Dance moms are the backbone of the competitive dance industry.
• 0:29
  SPEAKER_01: From shuttling kids from studio to stage to organizing the dream duffel for a long competition weekend, we know how hard you work to keep your dancer on top of their game.
• 0:37
  SPEAKER_01: Today on Making the Impact, we hear from two veteran dance moms about their best practices for navigating the competitive dance world of today.
• 0:46
  SPEAKER_02: Hey Dance World, welcome to this week's episode of Making the Impact.
• 0:50
  SPEAKER_02: I'm your host, Courtney Ortiz, and I'm here with my co-host, Leslie Mueller.
• 0:53
  SPEAKER_01: Hello, Courtney.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_02: How are you?
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_02: I'm good.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_01: How are you doing?
• 0:56
  SPEAKER_01: I'm so good, just on a high after our uh live event at Capezio last weekend.
• 1:02
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, oh my gosh, it was so much fun, such a huge turnout.
• 1:07
  SPEAKER_02: We had a clask, we did a live podcast, we gave out freebies, we mixed and mingled with all of our fans.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_02: It was such a hit.
• 1:14
  SPEAKER_01: It was amazing, and we are just so grateful for everyone's support.
• 1:18
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you to Capizio for hosting, and we can't wait to do something like that again.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we hope to host some more live podcast events coming to a city near you, and who knows, maybe some might be happening this summer.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_02: Stay tuned for more information if they do get announced sooner than later, hopefully.
• 1:35
  SPEAKER_02: But we hope to do some more New York City ones.
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_02: I think it was a hit for sure.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_02: So let's make it happen.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 1:41
  SPEAKER_02: And absolutely giant shout out to Capizio for wanting to sponsor us with this live event.
• 1:48
  SPEAKER_02: It was so exciting, and we are so grateful for Capezio's support.
• 1:53
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you, thank you, thank you from one of the the leading dance brands in the entire world.
• 1:58
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, how epic.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: Epic.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: And the epic new remodel of the store is just stunning.
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I'm so glad that some of our fans were some of the first to see it in all its glory.
• 2:09
  SPEAKER_01: So thanks to Capizio, thanks to our fans, thanks to our new friends who all showed up, lots of new folks, new faces.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_01: So yeah, we just are I'm just I don't know.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_01: I'm just excited.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_01: April's gonna be a great month.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_02: It definitely is, and we're still in competition season over here, and I hope that everyone's season's going wonderful.
• 2:28
  SPEAKER_02: And on this week's episode of Making the Impact, we are chatting with some dance parents.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_02: We're talking to veterans actually, who have been doing this for a very long time for many, many years.
• 2:39
  SPEAKER_02: And they're going to share all of their tips and tricks and all of the things that they've learned through their time as a veteran dance parent.
• 2:47
  SPEAKER_02: But before we jump into our episode, we want to share our recent Making the Impact award winners.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_02: Leslie, would you like to announce the first winner?
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_01: Congratulations from Streets Dance Conventions event in Indianapolis, Indiana.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_01: Congrats to Jamie Bragg Signature Dance from Marion, Indiana for their production of Vogue.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_02: And from Diva Dance Competitions event in Worcester, Massachusetts.
• 3:09
  SPEAKER_02: Congrats to Dance Works Movement Design from Milford, New Hampshire for their solo, Beattie, performed by Jaden Beattie.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_02: Congrats, y'all! And before we jump in, let's hear from our sponsors.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: Our season five premiere sponsor, Francisco Gella Danceworks, will be hosting a unique seven-day intensive this summer in Miami, Florida.
• 3:28
  SPEAKER_01: Ballet Plus is an in-depth intensive leading students towards developing a strong technical foundation in ballet, modern, and jazz with a highly refined and authentic artistic voice.
• 3:38
  SPEAKER_01: Intermediate and advanced dancers ages 10 through 22 are able to attend this exciting week-long event with over 60 hours of dancing from an exceptional faculty, including Francisco Gella, Yusha Marie Sorzano, and even Making the Impact's own Courtney Ortiz.
• 3:52
  SPEAKER_01: Dancers will take a variety of different classes like ballet, point, musical theater, modern dance with live percussion, Horton, contemporary, conditioning, Pilates, repertoire, and so much more.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_01: Parents will even have a chance to sit in and watch certain classes throughout the week, and all dancers are eligible for scholarships to future Francisco Gela Danceworks events.
• 4:11
  SPEAKER_01: Mark your calendars to attend Ballet Plus from June 9th through 15th, 2024.
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_01: And register now to receive$75 off tuition with our exclusive podcast promo code.
• 4:21
  SPEAKER_01: Use the code MAKINGTHEIMPATINGALL CAPS when registering for the Ballet Plus Intensive at FranciscogelaDance.com.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_02: Alright everyone! I'm excited for this episode today because it's for the dance parents out there.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_02: We love you, dance parents, and we actually have brought on some veteran dance moms on the episode today to share some tips and tricks from their time as a dance parent.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_02: They've been doing this for a very long time, so I'm sure that they know a lot of things to share with our listener and our world out there for a lot of the newer, inexperienced dance moms who are breaking into this beautiful thing we called the dance industry and the competitive dance side of the industry.
• 5:02
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited to have two brand new guests joining us.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_02: And the first guest that I'm excited to welcome is a platinum premium member.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_02: They have been a die hard making the impact fan from the beginning.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_02: And I have even had the chance to meet them and get to know them even more on our seasonal Zoom check-ins with our Platinum Premium members.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_02: It's been so great to get to know them and learn about their dancers' journey.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_02: And I was like, let's have a Platinum Premium veteran dance mom on this episode.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_02: I'm excited to welcome Jody Ashby to the pod.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Jody.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much.
• 5:36
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so honored to be here.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_02: It's gotta feel pretty cool to like finally be on a podcast that you die hard listen to.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_02: Like as a client.
• 5:45
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, it's amazing.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: I mean, I've listened to every episode.
• 5:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, yeah, it's just amazing.
• 5:52
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm just so honored.
• 5:53
  SPEAKER_00: So thank you so much.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_02: I'm really, really excited to learn more about you.
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_02: So please feel free to share with the world where you're based, how many dancers you have, where they dance, and anything else you'd like to share about being a dance mom.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_00: Sure.
• 6:10
  SPEAKER_00: So thank you.
• 6:11
  SPEAKER_00: We're based in Cleveland, Ohio, just on the east side, like a suburb of Cleveland.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_00: I'm a dance mom to three daughters varying ages, Jenny, Jamie and Josie.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: Uh Jenny is a senior in high school.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: She's about to graduate.
• 6:25
  SPEAKER_00: Jamie's a freshman, and Josie's a seventh grader.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_00: And they've been competing in like all styles of dance.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_00: So you name a style, they've probably danced in it for over my oldest one for over 12 years.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_00: My oldest, Jenny, is actually going to CLI Conservatory in the fall.
• 6:40
  SPEAKER_00: So she got accepted, so she is so excited.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_00: I can tell you more a little later.
• 6:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just a very in-default dance mom at our studio.
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_00: We're in Solon, Ohio, Dance Studio M.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_00: Thank you, all the teachers out there.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: We love you.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_00: And I just love helping others and sharing my knowledge with everyone.
• 6:54
  SPEAKER_00: I did dance growing up, actually, at a different dance studio called Noreen Londergan School of Dance in Mayfield, Ohio.
• 7:01
  SPEAKER_00: And I was on the high school dance team and like did football games and basketball games.
• 7:06
  SPEAKER_00: And um my daughters just started dancing and competing at the same studio growing up.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: And then we ended up moving like 20 minutes away about 10 years ago.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_00: So we moved to our new studio.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_00: And um, so it's just been an amazing experience.
• 7:19
  SPEAKER_00: They've gotten so much more confident and just with so much experience, I have so much to share about that.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_00: And I even started to dance myself back at my local studio about five years ago.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_00: So I take a tell tap and jazz and we perform in the recitals.
• 7:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I even perform with a like a local in-house, like kind of like dance showcase group, and we perform before I got I did get injured recently.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: So um I've been kind of taking hiatus, but with that, but I still dance at my co-studio.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: So it's just we're a whole family of dance, and it's just an amazing experience.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: So so thankful.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 7:56
  SPEAKER_00: I'll dance all the time.
• 7:57
  SPEAKER_02: You've been doing this for a while, and it sounds like that you aren't finished yet because your one dancer is only in seventh grade, so you have many more years of this dance mom life.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 8:07
  SPEAKER_02: I love it.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_02: Well, Jody, thank you for supporting our podcast.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_02: Thanks for being a Platinum Premium member, and thank you for joining us as a guest on Making the Impact.
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you so much.
• 8:17
  SPEAKER_02: All right, our next veteran dance parent is coming to you from Texas.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_02: I'm just meeting them for the very first time, and they were actually highly recommended by the one and only Terrell Mitchell to be here and join us.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: He hit me up, he said, I have the perfect dance mom for for you for this episode.
• 8:35
  SPEAKER_02: So I'm very excited to welcome Melanie Manning.
• 8:38
  SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Melanie.
• 8:39
  SPEAKER_03: Hi, thank you.
• 8:40
  SPEAKER_03: No pressure.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_03: I know, right?
• 8:42
  SPEAKER_03: I'm so honored to be here and to be a part.
• 8:47
  SPEAKER_02: So thank you for asking me.
• 8:49
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely, yes.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_02: I'm thrilled to get to know you and learn all about you.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_02: So, same kind of thing.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_02: Tell us more.
• 8:55
  SPEAKER_02: How many years have you been a dance mom?
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_02: What how many dancers do you have?
• 8:59
  SPEAKER_02: Where do you dance?
• 9:00
  SPEAKER_02: Tell us more about you.
• 9:02
  unknown: Cool.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_03: So, as you stated, from Texas, a suburb outside of Houston, Texas, really.
• 9:08
  SPEAKER_03: And I am mom to hashtag those manning girls.
• 9:11
  SPEAKER_03: So I have two girls, two daughters that dance.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_03: I tease that it's a whole brand.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_03: I used to tell them all the time, you better rep the brand.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_03: That was the number one brew that they were repping.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_03: Good manners.
• 9:20
  SPEAKER_03: You have that manning name doing those things.
• 9:23
  SPEAKER_03: That was the first thing.
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_03: And then after that came repping, obviously the studios.
• 9:26
  SPEAKER_03: But I have been doing this since competitive dance mom, since June 2008.
• 9:33
  SPEAKER_03: So since I have Morgan, who is a junior at Point Park University, going after a BFA in dance, but a modern concentration.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_03: And then I have a senior high schooler named Madison, who attends the high school or kinder high school for performing and visual arts under the dance art major.
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_03: So I've been doing this since a competitive dance mom since Morgan was five.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_03: So 2018, 2008.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_03: She came out of a room a couple months prior to that.
• 10:06
  SPEAKER_03: We're um from Becky's Academy of Dance in Katy, Texas, and came up to me and told me, Mommy, I want to be a part of company next year.
• 10:15
  SPEAKER_03: And I had no clue what that was.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_03: But what had happened is one she had an assistant in the class, 14-year-old assistant, that took a liking to Morgan and basically whispered in her ear, like, You want to do this, don't you?
• 10:27
  SPEAKER_03: You want to be in company.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_03: I think you'd be so great.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_03: You just need to go out there and tell your mom.
• 10:30
  SPEAKER_03: And she did.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_03: And I tease that person now to this day.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_03: Her name's Brianna Young.
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_03: And I tease her that, like, next time you need to like talk to the mom first before you tell her child to go spend their money.
• 10:43
  SPEAKER_03: She's like, I would do it all over again and twice on Sunday with the impact that I've had.
• 10:48
  SPEAKER_03: So and then Madison came behind her, and I really tried, um, three years behind her, tried to get Madison to do something different because Morgan had kind of started fostering a name for herself and was just pretty like an amazing, totally biased, but amazing little individual student dancer.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_03: And I wanted Madison to have her own path.
• 11:06
  SPEAKER_03: I was worried.
• 11:07
  SPEAKER_03: I'm an only child, so I was really worried about coming behind and feeling like she needed to like fill somebody's footsteps.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_03: And so we I tried to get her to do other things drama, cheerleading, all the things, install dance, and she just kept coming back to dance.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_03: Or, you know, that was just what she wanted to do.
• 11:24
  SPEAKER_03: So then my effort became where my um Morgan, my oldest, was really so I thought that too interesting, Jody.
• 11:30
  SPEAKER_03: You're like JJJ's.
• 11:32
  SPEAKER_03: We're the MMMs, and my husband's name is Marcus, but our last name's Manny, so we're the MM family.
• 11:37
  SPEAKER_03: So I thought about that when I saw that.
• 11:39
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, oh, we got that connection.
• 11:40
  SPEAKER_03: I love that.
• 11:41
  SPEAKER_03: So Morgan, my oldest, is uh her really strong suit was tap, or is tap still.
• 11:47
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, she's performing this weekend at Point Park University in a tap piece by a senior like um student choreography.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_03: And then Madison wanted to do tap too.
• 11:56
  SPEAKER_03: That was her first look she wanted to do, and I did.
• 11:58
  SPEAKER_03: I said, no, like you've got to do something different because at least let's go a different route.
• 12:02
  SPEAKER_03: So Madison's really strong in hip-hop, commercial dance, and those things.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_03: So anyway, and Morgan graduated from the same high school, and Madison will be graduating, and it's still up in the air as to where Madison will be attending, but she has some good options ahead.
• 12:17
  SPEAKER_03: But she wants to pursue a BFA and dance as well.
• 12:20
  SPEAKER_02: I love that.
• 12:21
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_02: How is she?
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_02: So your one daughter's at Point Park.
• 12:25
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, and junior, you said?
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, a junior.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 12:29
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, she loves that.
• 12:30
  SPEAKER_03: It was not her first choice, but definitely her best choice.
• 12:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like she was like, she didn't get accepted into her first choice, but she was like, I didn't know what I didn't know, and this was where I was supposed to be, and she's flourishing in her 16th dance concert series in three, two and a half years, like killing it.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_03: That's awesome.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's really that's really great to hear too.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that that's something we probably talked about a little pro on our um college dance episode, but like you know, so so many I know so many dancers have these like dreams of getting into this one school, and it's like you gotta kinda make sure you have some backup plans, everybody, because you might not get into that one school, and then it might actually work out better for you.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_02: You like like you said, she didn't really think she wanted to go there, and now she's flourishing and loving it.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_02: So that's a great little success story.
• 13:16
  SPEAKER_02: For sure.
• 13:17
  SPEAKER_02: Sweet.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_02: Well, y'all, let's jump in.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_02: I can't wait to hear what I can't wait to learn from you because I've never been a dance parent.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_02: So I can't wait to our perspectives are a little different.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 13:29
  SPEAKER_01: Well, so um, Melanie, we heard how how your children got into dance.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_01: Jody, how did how did you first place your first daughter in?
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_01: And and did everybody follow suit willingly, or did you have to kind of say, you're doing this too?
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 13:40
  SPEAKER_00: So they kind of grew up with it.
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_00: Jenny, she has been loving, not to embarrass her, but she's been loving to like look at herself in the mirror since she was a little kid.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my god.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_00: Just dancing and just like loving music and just just kind of like, I don't know, she's just really funny about that.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: So because we lived really close to my dance studio growing up, we just were like, yeah, let's just see what it does.
• 14:03
  SPEAKER_00: I also kept all of my dance costumes from when I was growing up at that studio.
• 14:07
  SPEAKER_00: So even as young, young kids, they were trying to fit into like the big costumes that like were oversized and like, oh, this is so fun.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_00: So she started at the dance studio and you know, and the mini tab ballet type of thing.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_00: And um, and then when I had my other one, she just kind of came along, right?
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_00: She just is like at the studio.
• 14:26
  SPEAKER_00: And then she's like, Oh, I want to come and I want to join.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_00: So she started and um and then soon, a couple of years later, doo-do-do-do, Josie started to come and there's Jay all.
• 14:38
  SPEAKER_00: So they I have some pictures of when they just were all dancing together at the same time.
• 14:42
  SPEAKER_00: So um yeah, and just they they at the time, uh, Jenny, when she, I think she was like in first grade or something, she they have to be asked at actually both of our studios to become part of the competition team.
• 14:54
  SPEAKER_00: I know it just kind of like depends on some of the places.
• 14:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I know at our old studio, it was just an honor that she was asked to join the competition team.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_00: And so she started with that, and she started with, I think a tap was her first one, and then she's did another tap and then another jazz.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: And by that time, my youngest one was asked to also do the competition team.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: So it just kind of went from there.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_00: I bet I remember my middle one, um, kind of like you, Melanie.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_00: Like, do we go in the same route?
• 15:21
  SPEAKER_00: Do we kind of not?
• 15:22
  SPEAKER_00: It's just kind of up to their.
• 15:23
  SPEAKER_00: But I had the her first dance competition, the first dance recital, my my middle one, she wouldn't go on the stage at the dress rehearsal.
• 15:32
  SPEAKER_00: And she, and the poor little thing, she was so nervous, she wouldn't go on.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: And um, her one teacher ended up giving her like this little trinket and said, if you go on the stage, I will give you this after you perform.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_00: And sure enough, we were in the audience and the the curtain opened up and there she was at the performance.
• 15:48
  SPEAKER_00: It was just like such this beautiful thing.
• 15:50
  SPEAKER_00: And then I think from then on, I think she got more, just did it like for fun and stuff.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_00: Does she still have the trinket?
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: What's the tr I want to know about the trinket?
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: It's like a little jewelry box.
• 15:58
  SPEAKER_00: It's her her dance teacher Lynn at the time.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's like, I don't know if she still has it.
• 16:02
  SPEAKER_00: But it was just it was just like such a memory.
• 16:04
  SPEAKER_00: It was just she was so like, that's what I wanted.
• 16:07
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_00: It was just, it was just so cute.
• 16:10
  SPEAKER_00: And then we went to our new studio um the year after, and sh and my youngest at the time was in like this um mini, I don't know, three to five-year-old class or something.
• 16:20
  SPEAKER_00: She was just jumping all over the stage, having the best time, and um the year after that, she was asked to be on the competition team.
• 16:27
  SPEAKER_00: So they were all kind of asked to be on the competition team, and um they do they have done all of the styles pretty much, I think.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, at some point.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_00: I think my youngest one never tap never danced tap compet competitively, but she did tap, but everything else all of my kids have been in, and some of them they've been in together over the years.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_00: So, including this year.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_00: So it's just been a whirlwind, and I could tell you more, but um that's how they kind of got started in the competitive dance world.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_03: Love it.
• 16:59
  SPEAKER_01: And Melanie, so your your first daughter got asked to be on company by by like personally by the teacher or the assistant.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_01: What about your second daughter?
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_03: So my second daughter, very similar to what Jody said, she was the lap.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_03: So when Morgan started, my oldest started competing.
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_03: Madison was like one and a half.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_03: So she was always lap, like hip baby of every all the company girls that were started.
• 17:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, she would be on the stage with them during awards, she would play in here, and so everybody loved her.
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_03: So it was, it was just considered like an automatic.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_03: She was gonna be a part of a company.
• 17:38
  SPEAKER_03: You had to audition, you didn't get to ask, but you did have to audition.
• 17:41
  SPEAKER_03: She was taking academy classes and little, and then it was strange in the sense of when she was ready to audition and start competing.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_03: My youngest Madison, Morgan made a decision where she wanted to go a different route into a different studio after three years.
• 17:59
  SPEAKER_03: Um because the studio where we are, it was just very regulated as far as age.
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_03: And that's where it went.
• 18:07
  SPEAKER_03: And Morgan back then, now we laugh about it when we look at videos.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_03: She was like, Oh my god, I was awful when I look compared to where I see these little five-year-olds now.
• 18:16
  SPEAKER_03: She's like, Oh my gosh.
• 18:17
  SPEAKER_03: Um, but that's another subject for maybe later in this conversation about, but she was like, Oh my gosh, I was awful.
• 18:24
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, I'm like, no, you really weren't.
• 18:26
  SPEAKER_03: But she decided to go to another company that was more into where it was a smaller company and there was no age division.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_03: It was just kind of amorphed and really a lot into modern base and more movement.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_03: And so she decided to go that route and a company that she had been with since she dancing with since um studio-wise, since she had been three.
• 18:48
  SPEAKER_03: So and then she left at seven to go a different route.
• 18:51
  SPEAKER_03: Left on very good terms.
• 18:52
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, she still would come back and teach at the old substitute where she first started.
• 18:58
  SPEAKER_03: So we left on very good terms.
• 18:59
  SPEAKER_03: But we she went to compete with this other company.
• 19:02
  SPEAKER_03: So just by way at that time, my little one kind of went with us and started there where she was the youngest, she was, you know, five, and would be like when they did a group member production, there was she was dancing with 17 year olds, the little bit.
• 19:18
  SPEAKER_03: Like she used to think they were her backup dancers.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's what she would say.
• 19:20
  SPEAKER_03: She was like, I'm at her piece of like Madonna celebration or something like that.
• 19:24
  SPEAKER_03: And she was like, where she'd call them on stage and all this.
• 19:29
  unknown: Oh my gosh.
• 19:30
  SPEAKER_03: And um has never gotten away from that.
• 19:32
  SPEAKER_03: And Courtney, I think you have like she's been in your class before or something.
• 19:35
  SPEAKER_03: Like, y'all have had some where I know she knows, like, so she's a whole handful.
• 19:39
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, but she um, so she not by choice, really went and kind of went with that company.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_03: It was called Top Flight Dance.
• 19:47
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't give a kid's, but Becky's Academy of Dance is where we started.
• 19:50
  SPEAKER_03: Top flight dance is where we then transitioned to.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_03: And odd enough, Morgan left that one in two years because she had to make a choice.
• 20:01
  SPEAKER_03: They were very, like just very strict in a good way about this came you know first as a commitment.
• 20:08
  SPEAKER_03: And she was very musically inclined and played the Marimba and wanted to do the Marimba band at school.
• 20:14
  SPEAKER_03: And there was a conflict, and she had to make a decision before signing the contract because I'm that parent that feels like you sign a contract, we're gonna hold true to that contract at least a year.
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_03: And we revisit it every year, and I would hold my breath at what they would say, whether or not they wanted to still pursue dance because I had grown to love it.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_03: But that's what we did.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_03: And so she had to make a decision on contract because whatever she signed the contract, like if she signed the dance contract, that's gonna come first, and we would have to maybe miss marimbas.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_03: And so she made the decision to go independent for one year, fifth grade year, to finish out and do marimba because she really wanted to do that, and she would still take classes at the studio and then come back.
• 20:53
  SPEAKER_03: Well, in between that time, she was just presented a different opportunity and went to yet again.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_03: I hate to say this because I'm like, I'm so big, like we jump studios too fast, but she made very calculated decisions and we support it.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_03: So she finished out her last years of high school at another studio different than Top Flight, where my other one spent.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_03: So for seven years, I was a dance mom at two different studios.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my god, competitive, oh my god, 45 minutes apart and doing that because I let them kind of lead the charge and what they do.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_03: You also I read in your bio, you're also a full-time state farm insurance agent.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I'm well I'm not age, I work with agents, but I'm with State Farm 29 years, and so full-time job.
• 21:36
  SPEAKER_03: Wow, but also you're on board shuttling everyone and shuttling, and yeah, that's why we had to stop it too.
• 21:40
  SPEAKER_03: Because I was like, we're outnumbered.
• 21:42
  SPEAKER_03: We can't like you know, because my husband would do, I would normally he would do the one that was more close, like closer to the house.
• 21:48
  SPEAKER_03: I would do the one that was further away, like drive because but um yeah, so they did their own thing and would compete against each other for most of their they've compete.
• 21:59
  SPEAKER_03: I think they only dated.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: Dance together.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_03: Um, yeah, danced together those two years at Top Light Dance in Katie, Texas.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_03: But danced together those two years, third and fourth grade year.
• 22:08
  SPEAKER_03: Morgan went independent for that one year.
• 22:09
  SPEAKER_03: I say that and just trained there.
• 22:10
  SPEAKER_03: And then Madison kept with it up until junior year.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_03: And then she had to make some changes because the program changed.
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so but yeah, that's how that went down.
• 22:20
  SPEAKER_03: Crazy.
• 22:21
  SPEAKER_03: I was that crazy dance mom.
• 22:23
  SPEAKER_03: I was, I was that crazy dance mom.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_03: And some, I mean like 13 dances.
• 22:26
  SPEAKER_03: Like sometimes Morgan one year did third.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_03: That was when I didn't know like 13 dances, and you know, more Madison's doing four.
• 22:34
  SPEAKER_03: And uh sometimes at the same competition, sometimes not, same weekend, sometimes across at different weeks too.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_03: So I would like try to do it, and I I enlisted a lot of help.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_03: And my parents fortunately have mother-in-law and my my parents that were both and still are, but they helped a lot with it.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_03: But yeah, it was it was tough.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_03: We made it work though, but I was that on the crazy train, is what I'd call it.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 22:56
  SPEAKER_03: So and I did not dance, I did not grow up dancing, I did acting, and so it was all new to me.
• 23:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like it just started, like you said, Jody.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_03: Then bopping around the house, I put him in a bad, like I call it a P B B T J bellet tap jazz class.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, yes, yes, and then you know, Brihanna, young 14-year-old, got her ups, and that's all she wrote.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 23:15
  SPEAKER_02: I can't believe I I'm in I'm inspired by the fact that you let your young seven-year-old or fifth grader make big choices like I want to leave this studio and go to this modern studio, mom.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_02: Can we make that happen?
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_02: And she's like in fifth grade.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_03: Like, not that that's not she was in third grade with that decision.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, then she wanted to do just Marimba fifth grade.
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_03: You know what?
• 23:38
  SPEAKER_03: I'll come back to it.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_03: Marimba's only here one more year in elementary school, top light's not going anywhere.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, that's all circle back around.
• 23:45
  SPEAKER_03: It's a very difficult child.
• 23:47
  SPEAKER_02: Like, it's yeah, she feels very mature with like I mean, what kind of fifth grader is making those type of life choices?
• 23:54
  SPEAKER_02: I mean that part.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_02: Come on.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_03: We do talk, we wait, and like this is what like the pros and cons, still doing that to this day with Madison and college choices.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 24:03
  SPEAKER_03: And I know you know that, Jody, with like, well, yours has already made the decision, but I'm sure leading up to the making the decision of CLI that was you kind of.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_03: And so, yeah, just putting it all out there and really allowing them to lead the charge is what I did, but I would guide them.
• 24:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I think I wrote that down, kind of in thinking about some of the things like letting them lead, but I'm still their guide, like a bumper car.
• 24:26
  SPEAKER_03: I'm still their like those, like when you should the bowling ball.
• 24:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 24:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like to be like, like let's kind of you know get back on there because this is the goal.
• 24:34
  SPEAKER_03: If we're this is the goal, are the choices that you're wanting to make, is it gonna lead us to the goal?
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_03: And if not, then let's get a new ball or let's go, you know, take a different lane or put up those, you know, so kind of that.
• 24:44
  SPEAKER_03: That's a horrible analogy, but y'all kind of get it.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_03: No, I love it.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I love it.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_02: Great advice.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_00: My uh, my middle one, Jamie, actually made a life decision too at some point, similar to you, Melanie, where she was kind of getting into gymnastics.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: She liked the acro kind of thing.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_00: And so she kind of quit dance for a little time.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_00: And so we were doing a driving again, similar to you.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: We have we are very much in common.
• 25:07
  SPEAKER_00: We're like kindered spirits here.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_00: We were doing like the gymnastics 20 minutes away thing, but at the same time, we had dance, and so we would enlist all of our help.
• 25:15
  SPEAKER_00: So we had two in dance, one in gymnastics, and it was it was insane.
• 25:20
  SPEAKER_00: But my my gymnastics one still came to the dance things, and then she kind of at the time was in some competitions with my older ones, just kind of like playing around with some of our old friends, and she was missing it.
• 25:30
  SPEAKER_00: And so, yeah, but she also made those like really tough choices, and we gave her the opportunity.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_00: We're like, what do you want to do?
• 25:36
  SPEAKER_00: And she was didn't do dance for maybe a year, but then she ended up coming back, and it's just it's so wild, so crazy.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 25:45
  SPEAKER_01: How do you handle so Melanie?
• 25:47
  SPEAKER_01: You mentioned, you know, that at your studios, uh, forget which one, but like there's a contract to be signed.
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_01: There's a this comes first or this comes, you know, whatever it is.
• 25:55
  SPEAKER_01: How do y'all deal with that as parents?
• 25:57
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, I I feel like there's in in the industry, and maybe in general, it's like people don't show up and people don't come and people are late and people are like, well, I have a conflict.
• 26:06
  SPEAKER_01: And like that just seems to be the situation for everyone everywhere in every activity.
• 26:10
  SPEAKER_01: But how do you, how do you keep your kids on task for that contract and like without being an overbearing monster of a parent, you know?
• 26:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's hard.
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_03: I will say that.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_03: It is hard.
• 26:24
  SPEAKER_03: And I recently saw somewhere, I think it, I don't know who posted it, but I know Terrell Mitchell ended up sharing it again and said this, and it was the the common thing.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_03: And I think we have shirts that say, like, I can't, I have dance, or you can't, like, and how that creates kind of a like a where sometimes students or kids lose the love and the joy of it.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_03: So it's to me a fine balance of doing that.
• 26:50
  SPEAKER_03: And I think it's about having a conversation, explaining.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_03: Again, I revisit it with them and I still do this like just did this with Morgan, my oldest in college because she's had some opportunity provided her that where the questions have been asked, how important is it for you to finish and get your degree.
• 27:08
  SPEAKER_03: And so, you know, always having that conversation about do you understand what your kid is commitment means as much as you can?
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_03: And I know they're young when they when they start.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_03: I'm dealing with older, but I think back then I still had the conversation with a five-year-old Morgan, with a five-year-old Madison, more so with Madison, because Madison's a little bit more social.
• 27:26
  SPEAKER_03: My youngest is much more social than my oldest.
• 27:30
  SPEAKER_03: So having that understanding of what this means and having those conversations, but also still utilizing it's a matter to me of planning.
• 27:40
  SPEAKER_03: So I don't feel it's easy to do when you have to sign a contract if you're not a planner.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_03: So enlisting people that understand our lifestyle, that if you're wanting my child to be president something, I need fair notice.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_03: And having Madison understand that too, if you're wanting to participate something now, especially in high school, we need fair notice.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_03: We have a calendar, we set out the things, and this is what we're signing up for.
• 28:00
  SPEAKER_03: So if you're making this commitment to being a part of the company, this is how minimum dances.
• 28:04
  SPEAKER_03: And I say company, she's a Hollywood vibe company member as well.
• 28:07
  SPEAKER_03: So we have to do that.
• 28:08
  SPEAKER_03: She has a minimum of three.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_03: That's the reason why she didn't audition for some others that have a minimum of seven like weekends.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: Like so we get all the information and really sit down and make a decision and a commitment that we're gonna hold true to.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_03: And then we do utilize as much as possible.
• 28:25
  SPEAKER_03: If you're allowed three absences, just like Morgan in college right now, she takes every bit of her three gives that she has throughout the semester.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_03: She takes that as a mental break and schedules something to really utilize that.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_03: So we really work to have that and like we'll utilize the absences.
• 28:41
  SPEAKER_03: If you get so many like absences, then let's plan around that and make that work and communicate.
• 28:47
  SPEAKER_03: So that's how we work to balance it.
• 28:50
  SPEAKER_03: And then again, like I said, every year we revisit and I hold my breath.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_03: And so far, I've been really fortunate as far as they're like, no, I still want to do this.
• 28:57
  SPEAKER_03: Studios have changed, maybe, and like the commitments of programs and not wanting to do conservatory program, wanting to do competition.
• 29:04
  SPEAKER_03: And then when it became no longer an option for my youngest to do, like she had to go to the conservatory program, but she goes to performing arts high school.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_03: It she didn't want any parts of that.
• 29:15
  SPEAKER_03: She's like, I don't want to do papers at school and then have to come do papers at a conservatory program, extracurricular, and take tests.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_03: And if I don't pass the tests, I don't may not get a solo.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_03: Wow.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_03: Like she didn't want that.
• 29:25
  SPEAKER_03: Like that's how it was.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_03: And and I get it, it was beneficial for some.
• 29:29
  SPEAKER_03: It just didn't fit us because she already was getting that at her school.
• 29:32
  SPEAKER_03: So as a result, she had to make some changes.
• 29:35
  SPEAKER_03: So just revisiting the conversation.
• 29:36
  SPEAKER_03: I hate that's long-winded, but yeah.
• 29:39
  SPEAKER_00: That's perfect.
• 29:40
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_00: I have a very similar story.
• 29:43
  SPEAKER_00: Like I was like, yes, yes, every single thing.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_00: Every year we get a contract, and what they do is at the end of the dance recital kind of year, like that we usually have dance recitals, you know, Saturday, Sunday, that Monday, they started to change it so that we everyone's waiting at their email, right?
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_00: And they get a a link to their Google Drive that they're special for them, and it has their name and it has you open it up and it has their schedule and their classes and their extras, you know, their solo duet, trios thing that they're that they're you know, registered for that they were I like um identified for, right?
• 30:19
  SPEAKER_00: And so everyone's talking, oh my gosh, did you get this?
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_00: Did you get this?
• 30:22
  SPEAKER_00: Oh my gosh, I don't know what to do.
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_00: Like, but we made this team, oh my gosh, I made this team.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yay, we're together.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, we're not together.
• 30:27
  SPEAKER_00: What happened?
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_00: And emotions and this whole thing.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_00: And um, so that happens in like a June, and we have about until like I think the end of that month actually to sign a contract.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_00: And it's the same thing.
• 30:40
  SPEAKER_00: You have to sign a contract and it's and it's all the things, and you have to say what you want to um commit to, right?
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_00: And of the teams.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_00: And um, you know, most of the time they're like, I think there's not been a one time that we're like, no, we're not gonna accept this team.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_00: Like they're just like, yes, we this is what we got.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_00: So I every year I'm like, because when we get the schedule, when we get the acceptance to the teams, we actually get the commitment to the whole year.
• 31:02
  SPEAKER_00: So even in June, we're starting that fall, we already know, okay, Mondays we're gonna be there from five to nine, some of them.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, Tuesdays, only Josie's Wednesdays, all three of them at some point, back and forth, back and forth.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_00: So we already know.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_00: And so that's really, really helpful as far as that.
• 31:17
  SPEAKER_00: And I said, are you ready to make this commitment?
• 31:18
  SPEAKER_00: Because if you do this, then means Josie, let's just say, hey, if you're interested in volleyball, sorry, but sometimes the volleyball stuff might go past the times you have to start.
• 31:29
  SPEAKER_00: Not sure if that's gonna work.
• 31:30
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you want to be this other thing, this other team.
• 31:33
  SPEAKER_00: Well, you can't because of dance, like like the shirt, like you're saying, I can't because I'm gonna dance.
• 31:38
  SPEAKER_00: Like it's completely true.
• 31:40
  SPEAKER_00: And I every time like you, like, you know, we have certain things in their contract, like you can't start to miss, I think it's two of like um certain classes, I think two ballets or two we call jump, sleeps, and turns classes, every I think it's every half year.
• 31:55
  SPEAKER_00: You start to miss, you have to make them up.
• 31:56
  SPEAKER_00: And so they do keep track of that.
• 31:58
  SPEAKER_00: And I just keep saying, okay, this is our commitment.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_00: If you don't want to be here because you're tired, exhausted, whatever, the you have another commitment, okay, but just know that you're gonna have to make this up.
• 32:08
  SPEAKER_00: And it's really, really important for not only you as a person, as a dancer, but also for your team, especially if it's your team.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_00: We're we're making commitments and they're learning new choreography, they're doing all this stuff, they're learning things, and if they're not there, their whole team misses out on their knowledge, and it that's not fair to them, and that's not fair to you, and you're never gonna grow.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_00: So we just keep having to make this commitment, and you know, there's times, of course, where they're like, we don't want to do this anymore.
• 32:36
  SPEAKER_00: Not Jenny, not my oldest one, but my younger two.
• 32:39
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we don't want to do this anymore.
• 32:41
  SPEAKER_00: And it always comes like in the fall time when the competition team hasn't really started, competitions hasn't really started.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_00: They're like learned it, they've learned all their dances, but they're not in the groove yet.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_00: Once competition starts, like in January, February, they're like, Oh, we're ready.
• 32:54
  SPEAKER_00: We're like, we don't want to quit.
• 32:55
  SPEAKER_00: But now, but like it's always just really hard.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, you've made this commitment.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_00: We've signed you up, we've paid for all the costumes, we've done all this stuff, and you we know all the stuff.
• 33:03
  SPEAKER_00: You have to make this commitment, and we can always re-evaluate it every year.
• 33:06
  SPEAKER_00: And speaking about this, like we have to make a a commitment, I think, uh, in the next couple weeks about what we want to audition for next year.
• 33:12
  SPEAKER_00: Not Jenny, she'll be off, but the other two.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_00: We're like, what do we want to do next year?
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_00: Josie is not sure if she may wanna she's had some things to deal with where her heart is right now.
• 33:23
  SPEAKER_00: So maybe we'll just cut down and dance, right?
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_00: And that's okay.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_00: Cut down and dance.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_00: You'll still be involved, but they don't want to lose her and they don't want to lose, you know, like us as a family there.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_00: So we have to decide what we want to do.
• 33:34
  SPEAKER_00: Jamie, my middle one, who's a saw a a ninth grader, she also just got put onto our high school dance team, and that's a really competitive, really great thing.
• 33:42
  SPEAKER_00: So it's kind of like, okay, well, where does that fit in to the dance competition world too?
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_00: And she is just she loves dance competitions, my middle one loves it.
• 33:51
  SPEAKER_00: She is such a she wants to make everyone feel good about their dancing.
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_00: And she just loves it.
• 33:57
  SPEAKER_00: She always talks to the backstage people.
• 33:59
  SPEAKER_00: She's just like a a really love dance competition thing.
• 34:02
  SPEAKER_00: And so I think for her not to be there is gonna be really hard.
• 34:06
  SPEAKER_00: My youngest one is more very critical about herself.
• 34:09
  SPEAKER_00: So we have to really kind of figure out this whole thing for next year or so, and that's coming up really quick.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_02: If your dancer has a passion for ballet and classical training and wants to attend a unique seven-day summer intensive, then join us at Francisco Gela Danceworks Ballet Plus Intensive.
• 34:29
  SPEAKER_02: Taking place in sunny Miami, Florida this June 9th through the 15th, 2024.
• 34:34
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• 34:45
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• 34:46
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• 34:51
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• 34:56
  SPEAKER_02: And I would love to see you there.
• 34:58
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• 35:03
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• 35:09
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• 35:18
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you to Francisco Gela Danceworks for being our season five premiere sponsor.
• 35:22
  SPEAKER_02: Hope to see you in Miami this summer.
• 35:33
  SPEAKER_02: It's crazy that that's happening like during the season.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_02: You haven't even finished comp yet, and you're like, we already thinking about next year.
• 35:39
  SPEAKER_01: Well, but that's why it makes this all so hard, is that like in order to do it well and to give it the thought it all deserves, and that's what both of you I think are saying.
• 35:47
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I need advanced notice to make this happen.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's on the studios, and y'all sound like you have really great studios who offer you that advanced notice to be able to say in March, April, whenever this episode releases, what does next year look like?
• 36:00
  SPEAKER_01: But like you have to be ready as a parent to look that far ahead, and so do the kids.
• 36:05
  SPEAKER_01: And I think that's hard sometimes when you know as an adult, yeah, you can kind of look into the future and sort of see what's gonna happen.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_01: But for kids, it's like today.
• 36:13
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, today for you, tomorrow for me, whatever.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_02: Like And it's also I think it's interesting to hear that I cause I feel like all of this logistical stuff I didn't understand or have to deal with as a child growing up in a dance studio, you know.
• 36:28
  SPEAKER_02: You make it happen, you make it rain.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, that's all they know.
• 36:30
  SPEAKER_02: Like moms, you're like, I showed up here, I got here.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_02: So it's it's really interesting to hear.
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I I think the uh important thing for a lot of listeners to remember is that you know, there's a lot of times where I feel like people feel obligated to like take everything that they were given.
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_02: If they got, if they auditioned for whatever on the company and they were given all these different teams and all these different dances and all these things, they feel obligated because it's an opportunity and I have to.
• 36:57
  SPEAKER_02: Even if financially I can't, even if commitment-wise I can't.
• 37:01
  SPEAKER_02: And it's important to remember like, no, you need to do what's best for you and your family, what's best for what your dancer wants.
• 37:08
  SPEAKER_02: And if that also means that maybe this isn't the right program and fit for you, look at Melanie's situation.
• 37:14
  SPEAKER_02: She had to find the right program for her dancers.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_02: Her dancers wanted a different way, path in the industry, and that's okay.
• 37:21
  SPEAKER_02: There are, I mean, I'm not saying stew hop 24-7, but it is important.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you gotta try to find the right place that you can call home where you like the environment, that it works for you.
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_02: And I think finance has come into play as well because this is not an this is not a cheap extracurricular activity.
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my god.
• 37:38
  SPEAKER_02: You know, unless like you are your dancer, love eats, sleeps, breathes, dance, and knows they want to make this a career, that investment is definitely worth it.
• 37:47
  SPEAKER_02: You know, you you're putting that hard-earned money that the parents are giving to these kids to invest into their future.
• 37:53
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I'm so grateful every single day that my parents picked the right studio for me and gave me every opportunity because look at where I am now.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_02: I'm living my dream and I'm a dancer and I'm a choreographer and I'm sitting on a dance, running a dance podcast.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you know, I never would have dreamed that at 12 years old when I just know I have to show up and go to ballet today.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you know, I wouldn't have thought of it in that perspective.
• 38:15
  SPEAKER_02: So I think it's important for parents to not feel like they have to say yes to everything and know that you can find a place that feels right for you, that works with your schedule, and also like juggling other siblings' needs and wants as well, which is another huge thing.
• 38:29
  SPEAKER_03: That's important, yes, Courtney.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_03: Oh my gosh, she just did a whole word.
• 38:33
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm like, oh my gosh, that's a whole like say it loud for the people in the back.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_03: But that's so important.
• 38:38
  SPEAKER_03: I think um recently had a conversation with a graduate from the girls' high school, and they were talking about if they could do things differently.
• 38:48
  SPEAKER_03: And the one thing they said, and it really resonated with me.
• 38:50
  SPEAKER_03: And I think I appreciate when I shared it with Morgan, she was like, Yes, that's why, you know, I made the decision I did like I want to finish my schooling.
• 39:00
  SPEAKER_03: But I wish I would have said no more often.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, No is powerful, it's so and then I and I do as a mom say no is a whole sentence, and I say it from the mom perspective, but when I say no, that's no end of discussion.
• 39:13
  SPEAKER_03: I don't, there's no question mark, it's not an exclamation, it's just a simple no, period.
• 39:19
  SPEAKER_03: And so that just resonated with me.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_03: But one of the things that I when I was thinking about this podcast and you know, if what are the most important things that I've learned?
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_03: And that is one about as a parent coming into this as a new parent is to set boundaries, set your standards, and don't deviate from that foundation.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_03: Do not compromise in that because when you do, you start saying yes to a lot, you get in situations where I've seen some of my dearest friends families and marriages fall apart as a result of, and I'm saying it happened, like I'm not like just standing marriages falling apart, but for it to be the basis of around dance, right?
• 39:59
  SPEAKER_03: I'm kind of like what just not being in the conversation and up, like spending way overspending, making decisions that where they it's not financially sound for their family unit.
• 40:10
  SPEAKER_03: I've seen families break up as a result of that, and that's heartbreaking.
• 40:14
  SPEAKER_03: And then especially when at the end of the day, they don't even choose to pursue dance in the long term.
• 40:19
  SPEAKER_03: So I'm like, was it worth that?
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_03: So I really like encouraged like to sit down and set some boundaries and set, you know, one of the schools my daughter's looking at is way out of our realm of like finances, and we're having those tough conversations around that.
• 40:34
  SPEAKER_03: But you know, if you get a yes, it's not a yes from us financially, and I really don't want you to incur all those loans.
• 40:41
  SPEAKER_03: And so, like, we've got to just like pray and work on some scholarships, some scholarship opportunities and things like that.
• 40:47
  SPEAKER_03: So when you start having that those conversations at a young age, I think it benefits you long term in life.
• 40:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, is where you can't go out and buy, you can, but if you're making this much money, you can't probably go buy like honey, like a Lexus.
• 41:02
  SPEAKER_03: You know, you just can't.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_03: Like you can't buy a Lexus with you know Hyundai money.
• 41:09
  SPEAKER_03: You just can't.
• 41:10
  SPEAKER_03: That's those are conversations and having those where I had to like start making those decisions when my child was in 13 dances, group dances, and then at three solos.
• 41:19
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what was I thinking?
• 41:21
  SPEAKER_03: And then my youngest comes behind me and goes, Well, you let Morgan, da-da-da.
• 41:24
  SPEAKER_03: I said, Well, that's before I knew better, honey.
• 41:26
  SPEAKER_03: Right, right.
• 41:27
  SPEAKER_03: I know better now, and that's not what we're doing.
• 41:29
  SPEAKER_03: Dance parents, are y'all listening?
• 41:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, that's so wrong because I used to get wrapped up in that too.
• 41:34
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I gotta be fair.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_03: No, what's fair is to provide you a home and to be and now I know better.
• 41:40
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm not gonna keep making my same mistakes just because I made the same mistake with that because I made that mistake with them.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_03: But I'm gonna be fair, so I'm gonna make it again with you.
• 41:49
  SPEAKER_03: No, don't work that way.
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_02: We learn, we learn as we go.
• 41:52
  SPEAKER_02: Yep.
• 41:52
  SPEAKER_02: And that was your first, you know, that was your first time as the dance parent, and you learned.
• 41:56
  SPEAKER_02: And then sorry, sorry to my second dancer.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_02: But however, you are not having 13 dances, you were gonna maybe have six and that part, you know.
• 42:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, and they're different, like she Madison could not have handled 13 dances.
• 42:12
  SPEAKER_03: Madison just could not, so I was due in her favor, she just didn't know it.
• 42:15
  SPEAKER_03: But I was like, no, and I'm not gonna do that where we're arguing and carrying on, and you you catch an attitude with me.
• 42:20
  SPEAKER_03: You're not in any, like, I'm that mom that will like pull your solo myself personally, but you still got to do your group because you made a commitment to the team.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_03: But as far as you and not having a good attitude and not being willing, that's the first thing that goes.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like, so I do troll agree when studio owners do that where they're like, we'll pull your solo.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 42:36
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, you don't even have to, I'll pull it for you.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_01: I got you done.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_03: I got you.
• 42:41
  SPEAKER_03: I got you, boo.
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_03: I got you.
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_03: Don't worry about it.
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I want to know, since we, you know, we're talking like in terms of y'all's children, we've got five children we're talking about here.
• 42:52
  SPEAKER_01: And that's that's a pretty good sample of, you know, different personalities and talents and things like that.
• 42:58
  SPEAKER_01: So, what do you think for both of you have been the biggest challenges or no, sorry, the biggest benefits of competitive dance for your children?
• 43:06
  SPEAKER_01: Because I think within all of your children, maybe the dance parents out there collectively can say, that sounds like my kid.
• 43:12
  SPEAKER_01: That sounds like my kid.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_01: And maybe that's going to be some helpful information that, you know, you might be able to glean for the benefits of specifically competitive dance, not just dance in general, because I think we all know dance is great for everyone, no matter whether you're competing or not, but competitive dance.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 43:26
  SPEAKER_00: I could start if you want, but I think the benefits for competitive dance for every one of my kids, it is like such a different story.
• 43:34
  SPEAKER_00: But the whole, the big thing about it is just teamwork and positivity.
• 43:39
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot say that enough.
• 43:41
  SPEAKER_00: They have grown so much in that respect and just knowing that they're doing stuff thing not only for themselves, but for their team.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_00: It's the benefits.
• 43:49
  SPEAKER_00: I cannot say enough where that my oldest one, or I could tell some stories where there's been some times where she was dejected, right?
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_00: Like she tried out for extra.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_00: Right?
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_00: Like you have to do a separate kind of audition at our studio for duets, trios, solos.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_00: She was rejected.
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_00: There's been a time where she was on, she um she auditioned for they they started this new like advanced kind of team at our studio.
• 44:13
  SPEAKER_00: It was new.
• 44:19
  SPEAKER_00: So she auditioned for this advanced team.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_00: She got onto the team.
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_00: Well, they went to their first convention and she didn't get the the adjudication that most everyone got.
• 44:29
  SPEAKER_00: In fact, she was uh one of the lowest and she was really, really hurt.
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_00: Well, guess what?
• 44:34
  SPEAKER_00: Compet convention classes, what do you do?
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_00: You go in there and you kill it in the classes, and she knew it.
• 44:40
  SPEAKER_00: I didn't tell her, you go do this, Jenny, like you go and kill it because you got this.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_00: No, she decided it's just one judge, it's one score, whatever.
• 44:48
  SPEAKER_00: She did it.
• 44:49
  SPEAKER_00: She had the best time and she ended up with like a little hip-hop scholarship after that.
• 44:53
  SPEAKER_00: So like she really can overcome such these like hard times, I guess, with competitive dance and just learning I can do better than that.
• 45:03
  SPEAKER_00: But the fact that she has overcome so much.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_00: She has been um selected for uh most improved dancer one year.
• 45:11
  SPEAKER_00: Wow.
• 45:12
  unknown: That's it.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_00: But that's like such an honor.
• 45:13
  SPEAKER_00: Like that of any like thing that she was selected, and I'm like, and I had a feeling that she was, because we have like at this dance band, and I'm like, and I'm just wondering like I knew I was so proud of her that she did that one year.
• 45:24
  SPEAKER_00: She used to cry actually at the beginning of the season, they have to like do these like 30 minute, 30-second, like one minute, like self-choreographed little solo things just to get them used to being in front of each other.
• 45:35
  SPEAKER_00: And she used to cr she was she cried her first year.
• 45:38
  SPEAKER_00: And looking back on it, like now as a senior, she is like, Get myself out here, I want to do this.
• 45:45
  SPEAKER_00: And in fact, the the solo that she did, I think someone recorded her doing it this past year.
• 45:50
  SPEAKER_00: She used that for her audition video for CLI.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_00: Oh wow.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_00: Like that's how much she went from this crying girl, I don't want to do this, to now all the self-confidence.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_00: And now that is the thing that she used.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_00: She choreographed herself to audition for CLI.
• 46:03
  SPEAKER_00: So like I can't even, I'm just so proud of her for like everything that she's like overcome.
• 46:08
  SPEAKER_00: That's great.
• 46:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's it's a beautiful, beautiful thing.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_00: Joe uh Jamie, Jamie, my middle one, the benefits from dance as well, is she uh as at the time, she was on um some teams with Jenny, my oldest, right?
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_00: And they're like three years apart.
• 46:24
  SPEAKER_00: But they were both into like acro, so they were doing this acro thing.
• 46:27
  SPEAKER_00: So a couple years Jamie, the poor little thing, would get real, real nervous and would kind of like forget her dance on the stage.
• 46:33
  SPEAKER_00: Oh no.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_00: Or she'd like run off the stage because she got really nervous.
• 46:37
  SPEAKER_00: And you know, some people would be like, Oh, oh my gosh, like Jamie wouldn't want to come back on.
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_00: She would be like, Oh, I don't want to do this.
• 46:45
  SPEAKER_00: And luckily, her teachers, their their teachers there, I can't speak enough, or Michelle, Nina, Cassandra, Katie, or Emily, they're just so willing to just talk to them, whatever, behind the stage without even getting upset that she walked off the stage.
• 46:59
  SPEAKER_00: Like, it doesn't matter that you walked off the stage.
• 47:01
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter that you forgot your dance.
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_00: Just go back on there and just do it.
• 47:05
  SPEAKER_00: And she did.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_00: Okay.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_00: And she did it.
• 47:07
  SPEAKER_00: She did at this last even last year, she I think forgot one of her solos.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_00: She just has this like I think she gets like a little nervous in her head.
• 47:14
  SPEAKER_00: And um scary.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_00: But she just keeps stealing it.
• 47:17
  SPEAKER_00: And she the the thing with her is that she uh just keeps overcoming it and she just uh loves everybody so much and respects the teachers and wants everyone else to kind of like do such a good job that she just moves on and it's just amazing.
• 47:33
  SPEAKER_01: Like that decided like she's like, you know what?
• 47:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I'm gonna plot ahead because I love this and like maybe I could put that behind me today.
• 47:39
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes.
• 47:40
  SPEAKER_00: And she's just yeah, and um she's now dancing in some of the like the more advanced uh groups with Jenny.
• 47:46
  SPEAKER_00: She's in some of the and she's like, I'm so proud of her and uh for just doing that and keeping it up.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_00: And there's Josie.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_00: Josie has she's really hard on herself.
• 47:55
  SPEAKER_00: She has like lacks confidence sometimes.
• 47:57
  SPEAKER_00: And so for her just to do everything is a chore, but she loves it and she loves all the people and she loves everything.
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_00: She just is really, really hard on herself, right?
• 48:05
  SPEAKER_00: And I feel terrible about it.
• 48:08
  SPEAKER_00: And so she just wants to just do it, just to be with the team, I think.
• 48:12
  SPEAKER_00: Like she doesn't want to let the team down, right?
• 48:14
  SPEAKER_00: And um and she does it and she's always so happy on the stage and she gets off and she's like, Why did I do this?
• 48:19
  SPEAKER_00: What did a mom?
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_00: What did I do wrong?
• 48:20
  SPEAKER_00: What did I do?
• 48:21
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no, no, no, honey, you're you did great.
• 48:24
  SPEAKER_00: You did great.
• 48:25
  SPEAKER_00: Don't worry about I know, I know.
• 48:27
  SPEAKER_00: She's she she's she's always worried that she did something wrong.
• 48:30
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, no, no, no, you did beautiful, and you're doing it beautiful for you, you know.
• 48:34
  SPEAKER_00: Like every some one of my kids are at different levels, and that's okay.
• 48:36
  SPEAKER_00: And I have so much to sh to um be grateful for with all of them.
• 48:41
  SPEAKER_00: And um, you know, I think it just learning the fact that they can, yeah, the perseverance, like you said, Leslie, just is is just amazing for them.
• 48:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'm just really, really proud of them.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_01: Perseverance and value of teamwork, it sounds like for your kids.
• 48:56
  SPEAKER_01: And sort of overcoming just the challenges of being rejected, especially for your oldest who is going on looks like to pursue a professional career.
• 49:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's you get a no 99.999% of the time.
• 49:07
  SPEAKER_01: More than welcome the no's.
• 49:09
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for the no's.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_02: Thick skin.
• 49:13
  SPEAKER_02: It's so important.
• 49:14
  SPEAKER_02: And I think that that's something that dance competitions and conventions can teach kids.
• 49:19
  SPEAKER_02: However, we are in an era of the other one gets a trophy.
• 49:22
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 49:23
  SPEAKER_02: You know, and that's that's where I I get a little bit nervous, where I don't know if some of these dancers who want to have a career are gonna make it.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_02: Some of them, not talking about y'all's, I'm talking about just other dancers who are always just like dancing down the levels and for a win and like don't want to challenge themselves and don't want to push themselves.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_02: It's like, well, if you think you're gonna actually make it in the industry, like it's gonna be a rude awakening when you get there because you're gonna hear a lot of no's.
• 49:52
  SPEAKER_02: And can you handle that rejection if you've never experienced it growing up?
• 49:56
  SPEAKER_02: That's and I think that's where dance competitions, we should be okay with getting 10th place overall.
• 50:03
  SPEAKER_02: We should be okay with not placing not placing.
• 50:08
  SPEAKER_02: You know, that's okay.
• 50:09
  SPEAKER_02: That is okay, everyone.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_03: You're still doing it.
• 50:11
  SPEAKER_03: And I had that like, I feel like you're in my head, Courtney, and you too jody.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_03: Like, so I was down kind of so to the question for hashtag those maiming girls benefits.
• 50:20
  SPEAKER_03: I just am gonna kind of read if you want me to expound on any, because I in my mind created a list, but I had on their managing rejection.
• 50:26
  SPEAKER_03: That's huge to me.
• 50:27
  SPEAKER_03: Preparation and practice, learning how to prepare for like your anything you do.
• 50:31
  SPEAKER_03: So in the morning, I prepare for my day.
• 50:33
  SPEAKER_03: So now they are prepared.
• 50:35
  SPEAKER_03: When Morgan wakes up, she knows, or she before she goes to bed, she's going through in her head that okay, I have Valley in the morning, I have Modern here.
• 50:41
  SPEAKER_03: I've got to work at the apprenticeship, all of that.
• 50:43
  SPEAKER_03: So learning how to prepare and to practice that's a benefit of because how you practice is how you're gonna play the game.
• 50:50
  SPEAKER_03: So getting really comfortable in that space.
• 50:52
  SPEAKER_03: I have time, so time management in the sense of like it when we had 18 dances that are 15 dances at one year, whatever it was, ridiculous number.
• 51:01
  SPEAKER_03: Like some of them were back to back, learning how to figure that out and get a drink and still get to lunch, paying attention to that.
• 51:06
  SPEAKER_03: I got a warm-up.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_03: So to me, time management, huge benefit.
• 51:10
  SPEAKER_03: Balancing many things.
• 51:12
  SPEAKER_03: I have teamwork already alluded to that and talked about that, Jody.
• 51:14
  SPEAKER_03: The value of feedback.
• 51:15
  SPEAKER_03: That was another moment.
• 51:16
  SPEAKER_03: So, like so being able to get in, to hear this feedback, not criticism.
• 51:21
  SPEAKER_03: I hate constructive criticism.
• 51:22
  SPEAKER_03: Like, what is it?
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_03: It's not critical, you know, it's feedback.
• 51:25
  SPEAKER_03: And then not only value, like when I say valuing, that's the important part of it.
• 51:29
  SPEAKER_03: So getting that feedback and doing something with it, executing something different, bringing something different to the table, relying on others and supporting others.
• 51:39
  SPEAKER_03: So the teamwork team, those are to me big benefits of learning.
• 51:42
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I've got to rely on my team in areas to pull me up when I'm not down or to strengthen me in areas that I feel weak.
• 51:49
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I'm not a strong, you know, a hip hop dancer in this, but I'm gonna rely on my team and I need to go ask so-and-so who's killing it.
• 51:57
  SPEAKER_03: Like Moona, who kills it every day.
• 51:58
  SPEAKER_03: I'm gonna go ask her, like, to help me and to like, can she work with me?
• 52:02
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 52:02
  SPEAKER_03: Um, the artist celebration.
• 52:04
  SPEAKER_03: Like the fact, like, I love when studios make it where you need to come out and watch other people.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 52:10
  SPEAKER_03: You need to come out and to award show.
• 52:13
  SPEAKER_03: I don't care that it's not your segment.
• 52:15
  SPEAKER_03: If you're up in the building and your mom isn't crazy like Mrs.
• 52:18
  SPEAKER_03: Manny is sometimes where I'm like, look, you need to go do some homework in the car.
• 52:22
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, outside of that, you need to be there.
• 52:25
  SPEAKER_03: You need to be there supporting the itty biddies and the mix.
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_03: Like that, the artist celebration is so huge in life and so important.
• 52:31
  SPEAKER_03: And I was just in a call, we're listening on another um um, my youngest Madison now participates, her team is TDA Prep, and they offer some parent classes as a result of that.
• 52:43
  SPEAKER_03: And one of them was Jojo from Hubbard Street, came on to talk about how to book the job.
• 52:47
  SPEAKER_03: And one thing he said that resonated to this point is like, I watch how you are on the sidelines when other people are dancing and how if you're celebrating them, if you're focused on that and that piece, and I think competition dance taught my girls that the like how to celebrate, and then putting your best foot forward at all times, like you can't rely because on regardless, like you can be first place overall one Sunday, next Sunday, you can be fifth overall because you were relying on being first and they wanted something different.
• 53:18
  SPEAKER_03: So at the end of the day, if you put your best foot forward and you're okay with what you've given, you do not care as much about what you got or what you didn't get.
• 53:27
  SPEAKER_03: You know, when Morgan did not get into her top choice, she knew she gave it her all and it wasn't meant for her, but she gave it her all.
• 53:35
  SPEAKER_03: So when you know that, and when they know that, that that it just takes a lot of the emotion out of it in making it as personal.
• 53:43
  SPEAKER_03: So when it like in competition, you gotta put your best foot forward every time.
• 53:46
  SPEAKER_03: You can't rely.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_03: You gotta like since so the last thing I have is stain on the grind.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_03: Ah, I'm doing it, stain on the grind, never settling.
• 53:54
  SPEAKER_03: And then every day, like this is something a mantra I have, and I've given it to my girls, is like, and today I begin again.
• 54:00
  SPEAKER_03: Like, score zero, zero.
• 54:02
  SPEAKER_03: Like, now it's up to me to put points points on the board every time that you're doing that, just like athlete, like dancers are athletes, but just like basketball players do, and like it's you start fresh every time.
• 54:13
  SPEAKER_03: And same with you know, you know, football and you know, like anything.
• 54:17
  SPEAKER_03: Like, so that's what I really think those are the true benefits that the girls have gotten that I feel will carry through.
• 54:25
  SPEAKER_03: Fort, you know, fortunately for me and my pocketbook, both of them want to pursue dance.
• 54:29
  SPEAKER_03: But even if they don't, and I've seen so many people in my 16 years that go a different route, but the one thing that's common for the most part is that they're successful in anything and everything they're doing.
• 54:40
  SPEAKER_03: And those that are not, there were some other issues there that they probably could have seen in dance.
• 54:45
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 54:45
  SPEAKER_03: And how it manifested in dance.
• 54:47
  SPEAKER_03: If they're, you know, if we were paying attention to like pull their coat telling me, like, hey, you know, that's gonna show up this way in life.
• 54:54
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, would do it all over again, would spend maybe not all of the money I have, but quite a bit of it.
• 55:01
  SPEAKER_03: Just knowing that I could have saved some of that just for where we are now, which is the tuition gossip, Point Park and whatever else, you know, Madison decides to go.
• 55:10
  SPEAKER_01: I just, y'all, y'all just really to me drove home because we, you know, everybody everywhere can have an argument all day long about why competitive dance is toxic and hard and unrealistic and except all the terrible things it can be and sometimes really actually is.
• 55:25
  SPEAKER_01: However, these you you don't get this kind of passionate explanation of why competitive dance benefits you from the people who just put their kids in recreational everything.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_01: Because listen, if you're just recreationally doing anything, you don't have that commitment to a team because we're just doing this for fun.
• 55:44
  SPEAKER_01: I can stay home because I'm tired, because it's just fun.
• 55:46
  SPEAKER_01: My team, it doesn't matter to a team if you're just doing something for fun.
• 55:50
  SPEAKER_01: When you add the competitive element, it ups the stakes.
• 55:53
  SPEAKER_01: And I think in life, you know, there's plenty of people who just kind of float around in their life as adults.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_01: And those are people who I think didn't have this experience of learning to work with a team, learning to be committed, learning to face rejection.
• 56:06
  SPEAKER_01: And like we all do know those people.
• 56:08
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe they're not really necessarily people we associate with because they're on a different track of life, but they're out there and we know them.
• 56:14
  SPEAKER_01: And they're maybe they're not as happy or as successful or as committed or as as grounded, you know.
• 56:20
  SPEAKER_01: So I just love that y'all brought up all of these key elements about competitive dance because, like I said, we can we can all have the argument all day long that it's all these bad things, but here are some really, really positive things about it.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_02: And what you what you mentioned, Melanie, about having the studio celebrate your dancers and others and and watching on the sidelines and how you're reacting.
• 56:43
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you know, with that whole beautiful speech, Leslie, there are a lot of studios who there are a lot of dancers who are getting the competitive aspect but are taking it almost too far, where maybe it's not toxic, but maybe just their approach is wrong.
• 56:59
  SPEAKER_02: And maybe they only care about themselves and it's cutthroat and they don't support anyone and they're not cheering for their friends, even their teammates and their friends.
• 57:09
  SPEAKER_02: But even like go when you're at competition, like you should be watching the other competitors, you should be supporting the other competitors when other dancers get called out in class for a small group, support them.
• 57:20
  SPEAKER_02: Don't be jealous 24-7.
• 57:22
  SPEAKER_02: Like, take it in for once and just be like, oh my God, look at this dancer killing it.
• 57:26
  SPEAKER_02: Like, I love that um what you mentioned about about breaking into the industry and and watching on the sidelines because like I've been there a million times at auditions where I've loved watching the dancers on the floor at auditions.
• 57:40
  SPEAKER_02: And I have personally gone up to dancers and said, I absolutely loved what you gave in the room today.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_02: Like, thank you for inspiring me.
• 57:47
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for making my day.
• 57:49
  SPEAKER_02: Like, you killed it.
• 57:50
  SPEAKER_02: Congratulations to you.
• 57:52
  SPEAKER_02: People have come up to me and said that.
• 57:53
  SPEAKER_02: You know, like that's what you want.
• 57:56
  SPEAKER_02: You want a supportive community.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, it is competitive.
• 58:00
  SPEAKER_02: We all have that in our in our blood.
• 58:02
  SPEAKER_02: We're growing up as competitive dance, sure, we want to win.
• 58:04
  SPEAKER_02: But also you have to understand when it's okay if you're not gonna win today, and you have to be okay and open to supporting other people because that will get you very far in life, not just in dance, in life.
• 58:17
  SPEAKER_02: If you are, you know, looking out for others and creating a community with within another and supporting and celebrating.
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_02: I so I'm really I love that you said that.
• 58:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I I think a lot of there's a lot of studios that could like take a hint and like be better at that because you know, it's yes, I've seen speed the room.
• 58:33
  SPEAKER_03: No, it's important, yes.
• 58:35
  SPEAKER_02: So even like studio owners, like it starts from the top, and I've seen like studio owners act bizarre at these events, and I'm like, oh my god, can you relax?
• 58:43
  SPEAKER_02: Like as a judge sitting there, I'm like, please, you are so cutthroat, you're intimidating me.
• 58:47
  SPEAKER_02: And this is like intense, right?
• 58:49
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not even competing.
• 58:50
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 58:50
  SPEAKER_03: No, a lot of our girls, you're being a role model for what's then later in life creates, and I think it's such an added benefit that Madison Normorgan, they very few, very rarely go to a convention.
• 59:02
  SPEAKER_03: They do Madison mostly does convention and does not as much computer solos anymore, but um, just because of everything else she's doing with school, but she definitely knows someone, regardless of what state we are, and we do travel with them, and both of them have been fortunate enough to be dancer of the year for national conventions once in both of their trajectories.
• 59:23
  SPEAKER_03: But they like now when Morgan goes to Hubbard Street, like she will walk in the room and know four to five people from all over the country, yes, from different touches, and because of the relationship she's developed and celebrating them and things like that, it has proved just like to be so beneficial versus that we all know those that are unapproachable, that are very cutthroat, who come from studios where I mean I've heard directors sometimes say don't talk to you know, don't talk to Morgan or Madison because they're your competition.
• 59:57
  SPEAKER_03: That's not like okay just in life, and you never know when you're gonna need the support system.
• 1:00:01
  SPEAKER_03: And I, you know, to do that and to build those relations, like it's just yes.
• 1:00:07
  SPEAKER_03: So I hate that when I see studio because you're being a role model.
• 1:00:15
  SPEAKER_02: Ready to take your competition dance to the next level?
• 1:00:19
  SPEAKER_02: Looking for a fresh set of eyes to critique your solo?
• 1:00:22
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• 1:00:25
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• 1:00:33
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• 1:00:44
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• 1:00:55
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• 1:01:01
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• 1:01:10
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• 1:01:15
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• 1:01:22
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• 1:01:27
  SPEAKER_02: We can't wait to see your dance.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_00: Me too.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_00: Me too.
• 1:01:39
  SPEAKER_00: Jenny has been to conventions on her on her own by herself.
• 1:01:42
  SPEAKER_00: She willingly goes, she knows not a soul, no one.
• 1:01:46
  SPEAKER_00: And she comes out and she's like, I got all these Instagram people, and I'm smith friends with these people on Snapchat.
• 1:01:51
  SPEAKER_00: And she sees the same people at different competitions and she rekindles these like relationships.
• 1:01:56
  SPEAKER_00: It's it is such a beautiful thing for them to watch year after year, seeing the same people at random places they didn't expect them, and just getting them so excited to see friends from outside of their studios.
• 1:02:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I wanted to touch on too is that our studio, our our owners are and instructors are very like low-key during the thing, and I really m um respect that.
• 1:02:19
  SPEAKER_00: All of our students for like their solos, it's so cute.
• 1:02:22
  SPEAKER_00: They all like to go backstage and like cheer them on.
• 1:02:25
  SPEAKER_00: It is it's so cute, and it might be overwhelming for the backstage um folks, so I'm sorry, but they are just so cute, and you just hear them backstage, and it's just such this wonderful sense of we're gonna get you are gonna do this.
• 1:02:38
  SPEAKER_00: It doesn't matter how you like you got this, and they come off this the stage and you can see them walking, and then they're like smiling to their friends who are backstage, and it's just like and they're smiling back like you did such a great job.
• 1:02:50
  SPEAKER_00: Like, oh, it is so wonderful.
• 1:02:52
  SPEAKER_00: And and me as a parent, I like to go and watch all of the dances.
• 1:02:55
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I don't like to sit in the back and like I like to watch just to see what's out there.
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_00: I just get so excited.
• 1:03:02
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, Jenny, Jamie, Josie, did you see this one?
• 1:03:04
  SPEAKER_00: They're like, oh my gosh, it was amazing.
• 1:03:06
  SPEAKER_00: It's just this camaraderie and cheering.
• 1:03:08
  SPEAKER_00: I cheer for everybody.
• 1:03:09
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah.
• 1:03:09
  SPEAKER_00: I cheer, I don't like it doesn't matter to even my kids if they get overall blah, blah, blah.
• 1:03:14
  SPEAKER_00: I cheer for everyone and I'm like, they deserve this.
• 1:03:17
  SPEAKER_00: Like they deserve it.
• 1:03:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I like to recognize all the wonderful, wonderful people that are.
• 1:03:29
  SPEAKER_01: Surely all these other people are doing that too.
• 1:03:32
  SPEAKER_01: You know, so it's like that's at least one common ground, even if you are like, we're gonna win today.
• 1:03:36
  SPEAKER_01: But like also those people dance five days a week too.
• 1:03:39
  SPEAKER_01: Also, those parents are running around like crazy people.
• 1:03:41
  SPEAKER_01: So, like, at least there's that, like, we're the same.
• 1:03:43
  SPEAKER_01: We're not the same, but we're the same.
• 1:03:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 1:03:46
  SPEAKER_02: So before we have lead out of this episode, I wanna see if y'all have any tips and tricks on like the competition day from the dance mom side.
• 1:03:56
  SPEAKER_02: You know, things like costuming tricks or must-haves in your dance bag that you bring to every competition, or how to survive a long weekend with multiple dancers.
• 1:04:09
  SPEAKER_02: Any competition advice that is like your go-to?
• 1:04:13
  SPEAKER_02: Like, what do what do dance moms come to you and ask?
• 1:04:16
  SPEAKER_00: So we typically are there pretty much all weekend, preparing to be there.
• 1:04:22
  SPEAKER_00: Most of our competitions are Friday through Sunday, and I am there Friday, Saturday, Sunday, just along with all of the instructors.
• 1:04:30
  SPEAKER_00: And it's just like, well, that's what you get for having three girls at three different levels and at three different age levels, right?
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_00: And so it's just we're expected to this, and I know I just block off, right?
• 1:04:41
  SPEAKER_00: Like Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
• 1:04:42
  SPEAKER_00: There's nothing else that we're gonna do.
• 1:04:44
  SPEAKER_00: But I like to, it's taken some time over the years, but I've liked to make sure that all the day all the costumes are in the same order that they are, like when you know all the stuff, right?
• 1:04:56
  SPEAKER_00: Because my my oldest one, she's not in 13 dances, Melanie, but she's an eight, and that's a lot for our studio.
• 1:05:01
  SPEAKER_00: I think only one other person at our studio is an eight.
• 1:05:04
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, for yeah, yeah.
• 1:05:05
  SPEAKER_00: 13 dances.
• 1:05:07
  SPEAKER_00: That's normal.
• 1:05:08
  SPEAKER_00: The middle one's in six.
• 1:05:09
  SPEAKER_00: It's still a lot.
• 1:05:10
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, and then my little one is in five, I think.
• 1:05:13
  SPEAKER_00: So to put on those things for you.
• 1:05:16
  SPEAKER_00: It's a nineteen.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_00: You thank you.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, nineteen costumes.
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_00: Right.
• 1:05:19
  SPEAKER_00: And yes, they're in there some of them are in the same costume, so I need to, you know, label everything.
• 1:05:26
  SPEAKER_00: Yes.
• 1:05:26
  SPEAKER_00: I'm like, who is this?
• 1:05:27
  SPEAKER_00: Jenny, Jamie?
• 1:05:28
  SPEAKER_00: Is this their jeans?
• 1:05:29
  SPEAKER_00: And is this their their their undergarments?
• 1:05:32
  SPEAKER_00: Like which one?
• 1:05:33
  SPEAKER_00: And they have fishnets and they have different types of tights and stuff.
• 1:05:36
  SPEAKER_00: So it's like making sure that they're all lined up.
• 1:05:39
  SPEAKER_00: I have a bag.
• 1:05:40
  SPEAKER_00: I have like them on a on a hanger with a bag attached with all of their like things for that dance, right?
• 1:05:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like whether it's a different hair piece, which doesn't happen all that much, tights, da-da, and I just hang it on the bag and it's all labeled with their name.
• 1:05:52
  SPEAKER_00: So I do that for every single one of the danzas in there.
• 1:05:55
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes I want to say that they're not that great of organizate organizing.
• 1:06:00
  SPEAKER_00: Oldest ones are my middle younger one, most of the time I have to do it for her and I'm okay with that, right?
• 1:06:04
  SPEAKER_00: Like this is what I signed up for and I'm really okay with that.
• 1:06:07
  SPEAKER_00: She's learning, right?
• 1:06:09
  SPEAKER_00: And I so I take some of that responsibility upon myself to do that.
• 1:06:13
  SPEAKER_00: But I make sure that they they each have a book bag and a but they carry all their shoes.
• 1:06:17
  SPEAKER_00: So they're responsible for their shoes.
• 1:06:19
  SPEAKER_00: So I make sure that that's in there.
• 1:06:21
  SPEAKER_00: I also make sure that they that we have like the stuff that everyone needs, right?
• 1:06:26
  SPEAKER_00: We have stuff to cover their parts that they don't want the judges to show or to other people.
• 1:06:31
  SPEAKER_00: We have extra so many of those.
• 1:06:32
  SPEAKER_00: We have extra I fake eyelashes, extra glue.
• 1:06:36
  SPEAKER_00: We have makeup wipes, we have um I should have made a list of all the stuff that we have.
• 1:06:40
  SPEAKER_00: We have um we've had like someone get really sick like with their like so we have Pedia lights sometimes we put in our thing, pins, sewing kits, um, glue for rhinestones, extra rhinestones, what else?
• 1:06:52
  SPEAKER_00: Extra tights, because you never know if something like the extra shoe sometimes, because there's been one time like I'm missing a lyrical shoe, and you can't dance with one shoe.
• 1:07:00
  SPEAKER_00: We know that someone will not be able to listen to the ones I have might be one or two times.
• 1:07:06
  SPEAKER_00: So you gotta have two shoes.
• 1:07:08
  SPEAKER_00: So we always have like an extra pair, and our people are so nice they, oh, you need a tap shoe, which doesn't happen that tap is different, but like you need this, you need this, we're here for you.
• 1:07:17
  SPEAKER_00: You know, extra earrings.
• 1:07:18
  SPEAKER_00: We have to ear for earrings.
• 1:07:20
  SPEAKER_00: So we've we have some people that that like are responsible for the extra earrings, the extra hair pieces, and it's just we have to make sure that everything's labeled in the bag and um snacks.
• 1:07:30
  SPEAKER_00: Always have snacks, snacks and water.
• 1:07:33
  SPEAKER_00: And sometimes it's just a reality that the kids don't want the snacks that you bring to the competition.
• 1:07:40
  SPEAKER_00: They just want you to buy whatever is there.
• 1:07:43
  SPEAKER_00: And I'm like, but I just spent out this much money and this snacks that you told me to bring.
• 1:07:47
  SPEAKER_00: Oh, you don't want that?
• 1:07:49
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, fine.
• 1:07:50
  SPEAKER_00: I'll just buy whatever's there.
• 1:07:52
  SPEAKER_00: But and that's okay because they're excited and just it's their time to just just have fun.
• 1:07:56
  SPEAKER_00: And I just sometimes I have to bring two duffel bags, by the way.
• 1:07:59
  SPEAKER_00: So it depends on how many bag how many kids you have.
• 1:08:02
  SPEAKER_00: Just be prepared to have one because we don't want the whole duffel bag to the whole duffel, you know, thing to fall over and tip.
• 1:08:08
  SPEAKER_00: It's been happened before with 19 costumes all on Monday, right?
• 1:08:12
  SPEAKER_00: So we have to bring two bags.
• 1:08:14
  SPEAKER_00: So that's what I would kind of say is the most important things to to remember.
• 1:08:19
  SPEAKER_00: Organization is I don't have organization.
• 1:08:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, organization is key.
• 1:08:23
  SPEAKER_03: And I don't have much to offer other than the extra.
• 1:08:25
  SPEAKER_03: I did, I'm a big fan of toupee tape.
• 1:08:27
  SPEAKER_03: So those are the things that we used to use.
• 1:08:28
  SPEAKER_03: Old school toupee tape.
• 1:08:30
  SPEAKER_03: In fact, I still use it even for myself sometimes.
• 1:08:32
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:08:32
  SPEAKER_03: Like when I'm trying to like things.
• 1:08:34
  SPEAKER_03: But um the other thing, very similarly, is that on the bags, I would put the number for that particular so index card's the number for that particular routine, and I'd put the expected time.
• 1:08:45
  SPEAKER_03: Just so it's kind of on the girls' remind of that.
• 1:08:48
  SPEAKER_03: And then on that label, I would put even though everything was in there and should be, but it was also twofold.
• 1:08:53
  SPEAKER_03: The reason why I would do this, the second part of it I'm gonna show you didn't happen as often, but I would put exactly what was needed, like the costume, shoes, all of those things on that.
• 1:09:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:09:04
  SPEAKER_03: And again, so when they're getting dressed, they make sure they have all of those things.
• 1:09:07
  SPEAKER_03: But then also my hope was it didn't happen as much.
• 1:09:10
  SPEAKER_03: More so with my first one, it did, not so much with that second one, but where they would then make sure all those things got back in the bag.
• 1:09:16
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, yeah.
• 1:09:17
  SPEAKER_03: Because it's important to put it all back in the back.
• 1:09:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, exactly.
• 1:09:20
  SPEAKER_03: So you don't have to call the school later or wherever it is, you know, up to the hotel to say, like, did you happen to find these things?
• 1:09:28
  SPEAKER_03: So it ended up being a list for me to check with my second one more so than my first one, but just make sure that gets back in the bag.
• 1:09:34
  SPEAKER_03: But that was the other thing.
• 1:09:35
  SPEAKER_03: And then the only other thing I did for us, I we would always have polish remover too, because we weren't allowed to have female pine.
• 1:09:42
  SPEAKER_03: Absolutely.
• 1:09:42
  SPEAKER_03: Invariably somebody in the company would have their toes painted or something, and we would have to like get that off.
• 1:09:48
  SPEAKER_03: So we did have to um we did uh make sure we had that.
• 1:09:51
  SPEAKER_03: I appreciate that and no red drinks, yeah, and no red drink, like oh no red drinks, no clearly red.
• 1:10:00
  SPEAKER_03: And then, or you have to not have your costume and be outside of the room, so you're not, you know, because that would be the worst.
• 1:10:07
  SPEAKER_03: Cover up of some sort, maybe on your friends, yeah, like team, yeah, your teammate's stuff.
• 1:10:13
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah, these are great and patience, patience, patience, patience, yes, pack your patience.
• 1:10:19
  SPEAKER_03: That's what they say about traffic here in Houston.
• 1:10:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 1:10:22
  SPEAKER_03: She's always pack your patience today.
• 1:10:24
  SPEAKER_03: I'm like, that's what I would do.
• 1:10:25
  SPEAKER_03: I'd have to pack my patience.
• 1:10:26
  SPEAKER_03: And then the other thing for me was always the five-second rule that when I found myself wanting to not have my finest parenting moments, I would just take five seconds to see like, would I still say it the same way, or could I present it in a different way where it's received differently?
• 1:10:44
  SPEAKER_03: So I would, I sometimes you would see me kind of going, and in my head, I'm counting one.
• 1:10:49
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 1:10:49
  SPEAKER_03: So this is why I'm saying, like, it would just come out differently than like zip it.
• 1:10:54
  SPEAKER_03: I didn't ask you.
• 1:10:55
  SPEAKER_03: I mean, because you do.
• 1:10:57
  SPEAKER_03: Like, I haven't always had my finest parenting moments for sure.
• 1:11:00
  SPEAKER_03: Not in a not in a dance room.
• 1:11:02
  SPEAKER_03: My worst parenting moments have probably been in the dressing room, Courtney's what I was gonna say.
• 1:11:06
  SPEAKER_03: Those have probably been some of my least finest moments have been in the dressing room.
• 1:11:10
  SPEAKER_02: I was that kid.
• 1:11:11
  SPEAKER_02: Oh my gosh, me and my mom, we would fight.
• 1:11:14
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, we would fight.
• 1:11:15
  SPEAKER_02: And she'd just pass, yeah.
• 1:11:17
  SPEAKER_02: She'd just be like, can someone else come handle this kid?
• 1:11:19
  SPEAKER_02: Because she'd be ripping my hair and like you know, like trying to brush through these curls and pinning something into my head, digging into my skull, like, and I'd get all angry.
• 1:11:28
  SPEAKER_02: You know, every single thing.
• 1:11:29
  SPEAKER_02: Saying it doesn't hurt.
• 1:11:30
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't hurt.
• 1:11:31
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, just get here.
• 1:11:32
  SPEAKER_02: Does it hurt?
• 1:11:32
  SPEAKER_02: And you're like eyelashes like falling off, and you can't see anything.
• 1:11:36
  SPEAKER_02: It's it's crazy.
• 1:11:37
  SPEAKER_03: Um you'll be all right.
• 1:11:38
  SPEAKER_03: You can see the stage, it's not right.
• 1:11:41
  SPEAKER_02: Something I just want to chime in and say that's I've learned from my professional experience that I think could be helpful for a lot of uh dressing room things, and I've mentioned this on the podcast before, is in professional shows when we have quick changes and we have a lot of accessories or a lot of different parts, they often give us like a laundry bin that we can just dump everything into as we come off stage and we are changing our costume.
• 1:12:03
  SPEAKER_02: Put everything into that thing, and then put your next costume on.
• 1:12:07
  SPEAKER_02: And there were a lot of shows actually, and this is like good practice for some of our senior dancers who might want to go into professional career.
• 1:12:14
  SPEAKER_02: And Leslie and I had to do it on our cruise ship where we had to preset our own costumes and we had to actually make sure that we were responsible.
• 1:12:20
  SPEAKER_02: We didn't have a parent or someone.
• 1:12:22
  SPEAKER_02: In Broadway, you have a dresser and they do everything, but there's a lot of shows that you are responsible for, your costumes.
• 1:12:29
  SPEAKER_01: So to get familiar with that and use competition as a as a way to practice, getting like how you like to get into your costume because like I laid my stuff out differently than Courtney did because I wanted to put the pants on first or for the whatever.
• 1:12:42
  SPEAKER_01: It's like you know, it seconds matters when it comes down to dressing.
• 1:12:46
  SPEAKER_01: And you know, you don't know how you like to do it in a time crunch until you've tried the multiple ways.
• 1:12:51
  SPEAKER_01: So, like competition is kind of a great place to figure out how you like to preset your stuff that works for you.
• 1:12:58
  SPEAKER_00: Yep.
• 1:12:58
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I try to teach.
• 1:13:00
  SPEAKER_00: Yeah, that's good.
• 1:13:01
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 1:13:01
  SPEAKER_00: It's really good.
• 1:13:02
  SPEAKER_02: Well, y'all, this was so informative.
• 1:13:04
  SPEAKER_02: I learned so much.
• 1:13:05
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for sharing all of your veteran dance mom knowledge with our podcast listeners and for me and Leslie, because I, like I said, I'm not a dance mom.
• 1:13:15
  SPEAKER_02: So I totally learned a lot from y'all.
• 1:13:17
  SPEAKER_02: And thank you for everything that you do for your dancers.
• 1:13:20
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for investing in their future and for their love of this art form that I know can definitely be very expensive.
• 1:13:27
  SPEAKER_02: I'm sure you've made many sacrifices to make this possible for your dancers and for all of the dancers out there listening.
• 1:13:34
  SPEAKER_02: Please thank your parents and thank them for all that they're doing for you and your love of dance because they it really means a lot to just say thank you every now and then to to mom and dad.
• 1:13:45
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for letting me come to this convention.
• 1:13:48
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for letting me do two solos this year.
• 1:13:51
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for getting me the costume that I love.
• 1:13:53
  SPEAKER_02: Like anything driving me across town during rush hour zoning.
• 1:13:57
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you for a long work.
• 1:13:59
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you for anything, you know, whatever it is.
• 1:14:02
  SPEAKER_02: Because I don't think that as and I know I didn't, like as a child, I I didn't really realize how much sacrifice and how much how expensive dance really is, and it's a luxury.
• 1:14:13
  SPEAKER_02: We're we're very lucky to have that in our life.
• 1:14:16
  SPEAKER_02: So now that I am on the other side and have made a career out of it, I'm very, very grateful.
• 1:14:20
  SPEAKER_02: So thanks, mom and dad.
• 1:14:22
  SPEAKER_02: Out there.
• 1:14:22
  SPEAKER_02: Love y'all.
• 1:14:23
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, and yes, make sure we all say thank you to our moms and thank you to these fabulous moms, Jody and Melanie, for joining us on Making the Impact.
• 1:14:30
  SPEAKER_02: It was great having you both.
• 1:14:31
  SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
• 1:14:32
  SPEAKER_02: It was so fun.
• 1:14:33
  SPEAKER_02: It was great.
• 1:14:33
  SPEAKER_02: It was great doing it with you, Jody.
• 1:14:35
  SPEAKER_03: It was, it was great, Melanie.
• 1:14:37
  SPEAKER_03: New friends.
• 1:14:38
  SPEAKER_02: We're creating new friends.
• 1:14:38
  SPEAKER_02: Maybe you'll see.
• 1:14:39
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, definitely.
• 1:14:40
  SPEAKER_03: And my mind, I'm like, oh, when I get off, I'm gonna go, let me go find her.
• 1:14:43
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 1:14:44
  SPEAKER_02: And how we always have our guests lead us out on making the impact is with one final thought on the discussion today, which you can speak to whoever you want.
• 1:14:51
  SPEAKER_02: If you want to talk to other dance moms out there, maybe that final bit of advice that you want to share that you haven't mentioned yet when it comes to being a veteran dance parent in the competitive dance world.
• 1:15:01
  SPEAKER_03: So I guess what I'd like to leave with that it's a marathon, not a race, and to keep that in mind and to surround yourself with a supportive village that has like mind and thought and that's focused on a goal that you're after and that your dancer is after.
• 1:15:22
  SPEAKER_03: So finding that goal and then finding people that support that and that maybe have a similar trajectory, those are the people that you should surround yourself with because not every dancer's journey, and I do say that, not family, because I have two dancers, Cody has three, but their dance journeys are different.
• 1:15:41
  SPEAKER_03: They might have similar paths to get there, but their end goal is very different between Morgan and Madison.
• 1:15:47
  SPEAKER_03: So figuring that out early and then asking yourself throughout this marathon is the race I'm running getting me to my goal?
• 1:15:55
  SPEAKER_03: And if not, I need to change the lane, change the path to get there is what I would leave those moms and dads and families with.
• 1:16:03
  SPEAKER_00: I love it.
• 1:16:04
  SPEAKER_00: Um I have a couple, I have a list of things.
• 1:16:06
  SPEAKER_00: So one of the things we didn't touch on is have for dance parents and actually dance dancers is trust your instructors, trust your uh your studio owners.
• 1:16:15
  SPEAKER_00: They know what they're doing.
• 1:16:17
  SPEAKER_00: They they have put you in this dance, in this position, in this whatever for a reason, and you're important no matter what role, no matter what thing they have, everything happens for a reason and they know what they're doing.
• 1:16:29
  SPEAKER_00: Um, I always also encourage the studio, if they're not doing it already, to have some sort of communication with each other.
• 1:16:34
  SPEAKER_00: When you're at a venue, make sure that you know where the dressing room is.
• 1:16:38
  SPEAKER_00: Make sure you know if it's the studio if it's running an hour early, if whatever is happening, just make sure you have some sort of communication.
• 1:16:45
  SPEAKER_00: Facebook, remind, band, something.
• 1:16:47
  SPEAKER_00: Encourage your kids to be independent, right?
• 1:16:50
  SPEAKER_00: So make sure that if you have to straighten your hair for a competition, teach them how to do it.
• 1:16:54
  SPEAKER_00: Teach them how to do the makeup.
• 1:16:56
  SPEAKER_00: Let them learn.
• 1:16:57
  SPEAKER_00: Teach them something new once every time you have a competition.
• 1:17:02
  SPEAKER_00: Teach them something new.
• 1:17:03
  SPEAKER_00: Don't compare kids.
• 1:17:04
  SPEAKER_00: If you have multiple kids, don't compare themselves to each other.
• 1:17:08
  SPEAKER_00: They all have just like you were saying, Melanie, have different paths, different journeys.
• 1:17:11
  SPEAKER_00: Do not compare.
• 1:17:13
  SPEAKER_00: Let them decide what they want to do this year.
• 1:17:15
  SPEAKER_00: If they want to drop or add a genre, let them decide.
• 1:17:19
  SPEAKER_00: That is totally fine.
• 1:17:20
  SPEAKER_00: Encourage them to know that if it was a different day, a different judge, different stuff, that the competition could have turned out completely different.
• 1:17:28
  SPEAKER_00: And even if there was different studios there, you don't know.
• 1:17:31
  SPEAKER_00: And you did a great job and just keep telling them that they did a great job.
• 1:17:34
  SPEAKER_00: If there's an opportunity to participate in any sort of like parent class or any sort of thing as parents, do it.
• 1:17:41
  SPEAKER_00: You only live once and have fun and let yourselves embarrass your go do that improv competition, do the toe touch competition.
• 1:17:48
  SPEAKER_00: Let yourself embarrass yourself yourself for the kids.
• 1:17:51
  SPEAKER_00: And kids, um, kind of a last thought, kids shouldn't be upset at themselves for disappointing a teacher if they did not do well on this dance.
• 1:18:02
  SPEAKER_00: They also should do it for themselves.
• 1:18:04
  SPEAKER_00: They need to dance to make themselves happy and be proud for themselves and really not for anyone else.
• 1:18:12
  SPEAKER_02: We hope you enjoyed our latest episode all about veteran dance parents in the competitive dance world.
• 1:18:17
  SPEAKER_02: Special shout out to our guests, Melanie and Jodi, for joining us.
• 1:18:21
  SPEAKER_02: Don't forget to follow them on Instagram.
• 1:18:23
  SPEAKER_02: You can find Jody at Jodi Michelle Ashby and Melanie at Those Manning Girls Mom.
• 1:18:30
  SPEAKER_01: Don't forget to follow Making the Impact on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Podcasts, and pretty much everywhere you listen to podcasts.
• 1:18:37
  SPEAKER_01: And if you want more exclusive episodes, support our podcast by joining our Platinum Premium membership for only$5 a month.
• 1:18:43
  SPEAKER_01: Subscribers receive free Making the Impact stickers, shout-outs live on the air, ad-free listening, and exclusive access to our QA episodes for members only.
• 1:18:51
  SPEAKER_01: Join now at Impact Danceeducators.com slash Platinum Premium or click the link in our show notes.
• 1:18:58
  SPEAKER_02: Looking for some outside expertise to fine-tune your dance before hitting the competition stage this season?
• 1:19:04
  SPEAKER_02: Then check out IDA's Online Judges Critiques.
• 1:19:07
  SPEAKER_02: Our seasoned judges will provide you with the video critique of your routine, just like you'd receive at competition.
• 1:19:13
  SPEAKER_02: But with IDA's online judges critiques, we take it one step further with our post-critique additional feedback.
• 1:19:19
  SPEAKER_02: Your judge will go through your routine again, pausing the video to give you even more detailed and personalized feedback.
• 1:19:26
  SPEAKER_02: You can even request a judge that specializes in your style of dance and is available year round.
• 1:19:31
  SPEAKER_02: With critiques starting at only$35, what are you waiting for?
• 1:19:35
  SPEAKER_02: Click the link in our show notes or visit our website at Impact Dance Adjudicators.com/slash one line critiques to learn more and submit your dance today.
• 1:19:44
  SPEAKER_01: Season five of Making the Impact is almost over, but we have some great episodes coming your way soon.
• 1:19:50
  SPEAKER_01: Stay tuned for an episode all about concert dance, tips on changing studios, and more.
• 1:19:55
  SPEAKER_02: We'll see you next week.
• 1:19:56
  SPEAKER_02: Until then, keep dancing.