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Episode 68: (Sharing Series, Part 3) Feeding Souls and Hearts · The Habit Lab

• 1:08
  Speaker 1: We all have areas in our life we might feel stuck or overwhelmed.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: So join me, jenna Zint Habit, coach, teacher and follower of Jesus, as we go after little bits of better by building offensively small habits that create big impact.
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: This is the Habit Lab Podcast.
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Habit Lab.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: This is our third and final podcast episode in a series on sharing, and this one's called Sharing with the Poor, and before we jump in, I just wanted to say that if you are headed into summer, you should totally consider getting my e-course Setting Up your Summer.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: I actually got a text today from a friend who is like reoccurring playdates at the lake on Thursday morning and realizing, because she's going through the course and like planning out her summer, I was like, oh, this is so cool to be on the receiving end of the benefit of building community and being strategic about how you set up your summer.
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: So there's my little plug this episode, though.
• 2:10
  Speaker 1: I have actually been avoiding doing this episode.
• 2:14
  Speaker 1: I should have recorded it last week and I had like a pretty big emotional resistance to it and I realized I was like, okay, I'm just going to record so upfront just to kind of explain some of my hesitation.
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: The sharing with the poor.
• 2:28
  Speaker 1: I want to do such a good job at explaining how much of a baby I am at this and I want to do such a good job at explaining.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: I want it to be so clear that I am not the expert at this at all.
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: I think what I would be sad is if anyone I don't want to put on airs or think that I'm better or further along at this.
• 2:52
  Speaker 1: This is, like me, still in the early stages and it feels probably pretty humbling and I feel super aware that I'm still very much a chapter one of this learning journey.
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: Even when I'm, when I share podcast episodes, I never want to talk about something that's not been in my own life for a while.
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: So I'm about a year and a half into having some habits of interacting with the poor, but I still, like I have friends, you guys.
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: I have a friend who has over a decade ran a large ministry in Mexico, lived there for long periods of time, adopted three Hispanic children.
• 3:26
  Speaker 1: She feeds.
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: Her organization is like a community outreach to the gangs in Mexico.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: She feeds a thousand I think about a thousand kids a week or a thousand meals I'm sorry about a thousand meals a week.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: I have another friend who has a similar program in Iraq.
• 3:43
  Speaker 1: I think I just have like around me.
• 3:47
  Speaker 1: This is not false humility.
• 3:48
  Speaker 1: I have a lot of friends who are so much further and have like, made this a such a big part of their life that I feel aware that I'm very much in kindergarten and there's so much more to grow.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: So, that being said, um, yeah, let's so.
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: If you're a novice then you're listening to the right lady.
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: But um, about it all started for me.
• 4:12
  Speaker 1: Well, we have supported kids through like Compassion International or any of our friends, both the friends organizations that I've mentioned.
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: We've done those kind of like monthly donation oh, my gosh, my neighbor's dog is so loud right now I'm hoping you can't hear that but we've done those like donations for quite a few years.
• 4:30
  Speaker 1: And then, obviously, from the last episode, we talked about different avenues of being generous with your community, but it was a couple, I think.
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: If I were to tell the tale and go back to the first chapter, it was a couple falls ago.
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: We did John Mark Comer.
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: He has a discipleship curriculum and they do break down the spiritual disciplines and there's a four-week one on fasting, and we did that with a group of friends.
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: It was like, think of it like a Bible study.
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: It was in our living room with like a dozen friends and one of the weeks, like the last week, was fasting to like share with the poor, commune with the poor.
• 5:07
  Speaker 1: And he started unpacking how much the concept like pulled out the biblical reference and then talked about the early church, how much when they fast, part of the point was to give away what they were fasting to feed the poor.
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: So like the grain that I did not eat on Thursday would go to a family in need.
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: And it was a way to like literally pray with your body and experience, like be with them through that act.
• 5:34
  Speaker 1: And I had never heard that before.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: So it was like, oh, that's so cool.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: And then also, you guys know that I'm like gosh five, six years into really regularly meal prepping, so most of the time I have my lunches and dinners made for the whole week.
• 5:49
  Speaker 1: So then when we started fasting on a regular basis, I was wasting food.
• 5:53
  Speaker 1: And then to learn this concept about how they share in the early church, they shared their extra on the day they fasted with people in need.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, that could be something I'm trying.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: At the same point I feel like my awareness of all the scriptures about.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: I wish I would have written one down.
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: So I wrote everything I wrote down.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: I forgot to write this down about how Jesus says that if you invite the people who will invite you, like, over to your house, the ones that are going to invite you back, then that's actually not what I'm talking about with, like, radical generosity.
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: I'm oversimplifying it, but it was this light moment like dawning on me that I would have said we lived generously, but 99% of the people that were targets for my generosity there'd be some level, some level of reciprocation, whether they liked me or you know just something.
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: There is some level of like.
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: Even most of my girlfriends who, like I, drop off meals for or give a gift, like 80%, 70% of them would do something like that in the return.
• 7:05
  Speaker 1: So maybe it wasn't one for one, because that was part of what I said, but I was like, oh, I don't think I have.
• 7:09
  Speaker 1: I don't have anywhere in my life where I'm just giving, where I don't get anything back, and it almost like I didn't feel condemnation, but I felt like the highlight, this, it felt like the Holy Spirit was like oh, that that is a thing.
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: That is true.
• 7:22
  Speaker 1: You get some level even when we serve at church.
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: Frankly, like probably one out of 30 couples that go through a pre-married class end up booking a coaching with us.
• 7:33
  Speaker 1: So it's not a high percentage, but there is an awareness of like it's spreading our name.
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: They're going to listen to our podcast.
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: Maybe it's not a financial thing, but I was like, oh, I just don't have anywhere where I'm giving and serving, like almost.
• 7:46
  Speaker 1: I think this concept of generosity is like service versus you know, sowing it and investing into friendships or community.
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: So I just felt really called out.
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: And then you just can't get away from the scriptures about how often Jesus says you know, when you fed the poor, you were feeding me.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: When you clothed the ones who needed clothes, you were closing me.
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: It's just a bunch of these concepts together.
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: I was like I don't actually do that and I appreciated the the um, john Mark Homer's study because he was talking about how actually not just sending money but being in proximity with the poor changes you in a way Like we need both.
• 8:26
  Speaker 1: I'm going to read um from a book in a second that says that a lot more eloquently, but I was just like that, doesn't?
• 8:33
  Speaker 1: It felt like a season where the lack of service and generosity generosity for just service for the poor on a personal level did not exist in my life and I was like Ooh, yeah.
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: So I just felt this invitation from the Lord to like start and because of habits I just always try to not do condemnation, but then what's like an offensively small first starter step.
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: So one of the people in my fasting Bible study actually suggested that like why don't you give away your meal, the lunch or the meals that you skip, that you have prepped?
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: Why don't you actually find someone who needs them to give them to it?
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: And it was just sometimes this is why I'm having this podcast is because sometimes someone else's idea I did not think of that.
• 9:19
  Speaker 1: That did not cross my mind.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: I was like I'm wasting food now that I'm fasting.
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: And they were like why don't you do something with the food so it's not wasted?
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: And I was like you're a genius.
• 9:27
  Speaker 1: So, anyways, that just kickstartstarted me.
• 9:31
  Speaker 1: We have we're near a park and a river trail and there's usually some houseless people around there.
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: So I started walking down on the days that I had fast to try to find it well, fast forward.
• 9:42
  Speaker 1: One man is particularly on the same bench and now we've been friends for like a year and a half.
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: Um, and I share my lunch with him often, even using that language, like I know I talked about sharing in the last episode it helps make him I think it's Bob Goff that I heard once making someone not a project but a target of love.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: So it's like not about checking off the list, which I can still like again, when I say I'm in kindergarten, my heart oscillates between giving the meal and be with him as a human all the time.
• 10:15
  Speaker 1: I don't get it doesn't just stay in like seated beautiful spots.
• 10:21
  Speaker 1: You know, sometimes some weeks is very much an exchange, you know, just being frank.
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: So I've been walking down and that meant like practically habit wise, I had to figure out containers to be able to.
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: I had my food but I'd have to figure out containers to be able to give him.
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: So I went to a local store and I found like really cheap paper, recyclable-ish to go containers and it was like 50.
• 10:46
  Speaker 1: So I've bought them and just thinking habit wise, like you actually logistically need to set yourself up to be able to do something like this.
• 10:52
  Speaker 1: I've kind of transitioned to more jars, like I'll save our spaghetti jars or Alfredo sauce jars to make it easier to just give him those.
• 11:00
  Speaker 1: But after a year of it, wow, it has it started where I was like, oh, I can see this lack and I feel the Lord invited me into this.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: And then I'm like, okay, what are habits to actually like?
• 11:18
  Speaker 1: On some level I think I would go to all or nothing, where I can't regularly serve at the soup kitchen in our city because all these reasons.
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: So then I would go to nothing, like well, then I don't have an outreach, or I'll only do it once a year, or I'll do it when my church does it.
• 11:28
  Speaker 1: But man, you guys, when I dialed it back and made it simpler and just sharing my food, sometimes we talk a bit, sometimes we don't, sometimes I have to move on to get home for my meeting.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Having a relationship with someone who doesn't have a house has shifted and changed me.
• 11:49
  Speaker 1: I remember one time when I was on my bike ride and I was like I thought I was helping him, not in a savior complex, but just really frankly, like, yeah, giving you food, that's helping you, but like reflecting on how much just being in relationship with someone who's totally in a different spot of life than you are has actually shaped and formed me.
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: I had this moment where I was like, oh, this is why you wanted to highlight this in my life.
• 12:20
  Speaker 1: Like, yes, you know, wear your hands and your feet so like you're able to love on him through me, like doing this, but also look at how much my mindset has shifted, for my awareness Like of it's just formed me in such a different way and, um, and to include someone who, like I said, I'm getting nothing from there's just the cost.
• 12:44
  Speaker 1: It has made me come alive in dying.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: It's so that oxymoron in Christianity, in a way that I had not experienced before, and I was like, oh, but then also just some practical fruit.
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: I was saying that I realized how much it's formed me, like, haha, I thought this was for him, but it's actually been for me.
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: Like, in the Lord's kindness, he's shaped me through this relationship.
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: And last summer so we live in Reading and it's stupid hot, like most July, august, september can be over 110.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: Sometimes we have a couple of weeks where it's like 115, you guys like woof.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: So, that being said, I complain.
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: I complain about the weather and after befriending this man.
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: It has just shifted my awareness of wow, we have a pool, wow we have A roof, wow we have an air condition and we have cars, that air like this, just like there are people out there who literally don't have all these luxuries.
• 13:41
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes we just get in so autopilot for our luxuries and we're aware of what we don't have or what's broken or you know, even if you're content.
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: I think what it did is it?
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: It upgraded it from content to like true gratitude, like I feel teary again that we have air condition and it was last summer that I didn't complain about the heat at all because I actually felt really grateful, like in my morning gratitudes.
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Most summer it was like thank you so much that we have an air condition that works and that we can afford to use it.
• 14:13
  Speaker 1: Like that maybe would have been like managing contentment last year, but it was actually.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: It grew, it took roots through this relationship and grew to gratitude in a way that I was like oh, and then fast forward.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: Our winters are very rainy for like days and days at a time and in our friendship with this man, we've bought him some umbrellas and I have his phone number now and for about six months and he'll text me.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: Number now for about six months and he'll text me.
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: He has a strategy for where he hides his stuff and sometimes his bags that he stores his stuff in, like his grocery bags, will get ripped and he needs help.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: He needs some new grocery bags so that his stuff stays dry.
• 16:39
  Speaker 1: So that, talking about what it formed in me, my awareness of again complaining about the rain, and I'm like I don't have to, in my daily life, be worried that my stuff's going to get soaked, my only possessions are going to maybe potentially get stolen or soaked, and even just being willing to be interrupted for someone else, in a way that it just forms you, I think I keep coming back to like, oh, this is why you don't want us to just, actually, I'm going to read, I'm going to find the passage.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: There's a book called Dirty Glory.
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: I think I told you in one of my other episodes I felt like the Lord tricked me into reading some books on evangelism.
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: This would be one of them.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: This is by Pete Gregg.
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: He's the guy that wrote Red Moon Rising and he's the what is it?
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: The 24-7 prayer movement.
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: He helped found that.
• 17:28
  Speaker 1: I think it's an old book.
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: I heard it referred to somewhere else so I picked it up and then I was like this is so good, but he talks about the power of with.
• 17:37
  Speaker 1: I'm going to actually read a little bit to you guys.
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: He's talking about another book called.
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: In the book Living Without Enemies, the authors outline four distinct approaches to Christian social engagement working for the oppressed, working with the oppressed, being for the oppressed or being with the oppressed.
• 17:56
  Speaker 1: All four models are important, but the authors particularly encourage us to move beyond the elementary approach of working for those who are oppressed fundraising, campaigning, advocacy and moving towards the more intimate posture of being with them instead.
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: Sorry, I'm getting a little teary.
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: Being with is not fundamentally about finding solutions, but about companionship amid struggles and distress.
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: And sometimes the obsession with finding solutions can get in the way of forming profound relationships and sometimes those relationships are actually more significant than the solutions and, I think, realizing.
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: For me, when I started by giving him food, it was probably more like working for him, giving it to him and then, over a year and a half of friendship, we'll walk down and see him.
• 18:55
  Speaker 1: I'll have the kids make him Valentine's Day cards or at different holidays, we'll bring him a meal.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: We'll text him like, hey, do you want a plate of Thanksgiving?
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: Or whatever.
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: But it shifted to more relationship and, if I'm honest, it costs more, you guys.
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: And yes, I just talked about the fruit, but there's some days that I don't want to.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: I want to go a different way so I don't have to have that conversation or not respond to the text and, of course, I have boundaries.
• 19:24
  Speaker 1: I'm actually currently in a season where we haven't chatted in a couple weeks.
• 19:27
  Speaker 1: So that's probably another reason why I didn't want to form the podcast is because I'm like, and I'm further off rhythm than I've been in a while, so this is disingenuous.
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: And then I was like wait, I can just tell them that.
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: So again, keeping it real over here.
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: But this, when I realized like I couldn't just drop my lunch, it progressed and took roots and became a relationship, like a friendship.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: I couldn't just drop my meals.
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: He actually even.
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: It became more evident that, like we would um for Christmas, we gave him like a new backpack and while that was helpful on some level, he actually didn't use it for a while.
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: Um, and I had to work through that.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: It's so crazy what it reveals to you, what's in your heart when it's not a friendship and it's just when it's something that you're doing.
• 20:13
  Speaker 1: When you're in a relationship where it's not anything you receive, it almost becomes this mirror to what's in your heart in a way that is revealing and honest.
• 20:24
  Speaker 1: But also that's when you can actually dig in, like anything that the Holy Spirit reveals.
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh yeah, there's grace to like learn and mature past, you know.
• 20:34
  Speaker 1: But wow, it brings up so many things.
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: So I remember being slightly annoyed that he didn't like this book bag that we bought for him.
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: And how could he, you know, just being honest over here.
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: But at some point with the text and the phone calls, I'm like, actually he wants the dignity of a relationship and he is the need that's coming more apparent without his words.
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: Necessarily is the friendship or feeling like he matters.
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, and I remember the Holy Spirit like that costs you more.
• 21:07
  Speaker 1: And I almost felt like I think it's because I felt, subconsciously maybe, annoyed.
• 21:10
  Speaker 1: I was like, why and the Holy Spirit pointed out, because it'd be easier to drop off your lunch and leave it costs you more if you're going to be with him and have a relationship at some level.
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, that's so, so true.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: Um, I'm going to read, to keep reading in this line.
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: Ultimately, it was the approach of Jesus himself, the word, who became flesh and made his dwelling among us, john 1, 14.
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: Personal engagement with the poor tends to be slow, costly and prosaic.
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: Perhaps campaigning can feel heroic.
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: Sponsoring projects might soothe the conscious, lobbying governments can be strategic.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: Naming injustices from the pulpit can appear noble.
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: It's unglamorous, and I think that is.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, I'm going to keep reading a little bit more.
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: It's way too easy to romanticize the poor or to politicize social justice or to categorize the struggle as something distant and dramatic.
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: It may well be important to advocate for the poor politically, to fight against the systems of oppression and to shop ethically, yes, but Jesus teaches us to earth such engagements into localized compassion.
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: I underlined that one like three times when they said that it's something that hit me and I was like, oh, this is what I'm experiencing like embodying it as local compassion, where it's like a life on life.
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: It's not me electronically sending $40.
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: Again, it's a both hand.
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: Those are strategic and please, like I said, don't stop doing those.
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: But I just want to invite you into this.
• 23:00
  Speaker 1: You don't have some element of sharing with the poor, whether it's your life, your time, extra things you have your food, whatever.
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: It's not just, yes, they're your target for love.
• 23:16
  Speaker 1: But there's something that happens in you when you're willing to express localized compassion, that Jesus shifts and will move you just so dramatically.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Gosh, what is the scripture in Matthew For?
• 23:31
  Speaker 1: I was hungry and you gave me something to drink.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: I was thirsty.
• 23:33
  Speaker 1: Oh, I said that backwards.
• 23:35
  Speaker 1: I was a stranger and you gave me something to drink.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: I was thirsty.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: Oh, I said that backwards.
• 23:37
  Speaker 1: I was a stranger and you invited me in.
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: Compassion for the hungry, the stranger, the sick and the prisoner is not an optional extra for those with strong social conscience.
• 23:45
  Speaker 1: It bleeds from the heart of true Christian worship.
• 23:49
  Speaker 1: When we care for the poor, we minister to Jesus himself and I was like, oh okay, so maybe it's funny because our kids do minimum afterschool activities or other things we're involved in on a weekly basis.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: I won't say yes to because I know that, also as important as making sure I prioritize getting to small group me, having this component is also shaping and forming, like having a purposeful habit of engaging with generosity with the poor is actually as strategic in my formation and what Jesus is doing to mature me as those are and not making it you know cause yes, it costs and it doesn't get as much but realizing like I don't know, that's just the backwards kingdom, that also it's bringing so much life in a way that I wouldn't have expected or vocalized.
• 24:44
  Speaker 1: So now, kind of what I've upgraded it a little bit to is that, again, since I meal prep, often there'll be not just one extra meal, there'll be a couple.
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: So we've been trying to, outside of sharing with our friend, our upgrade in the last like maybe a couple months has been there's a couple sections in our town that have a bunch of people who will be on the streets.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: So the kids and I will go and we'll take our, I'll take our leftovers, I'll heat them up and then I'll write what they're on on them and we'll go.
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: Like probably we average like maybe two to three meals that we have to give away, and I tried most of the time I try to take a kid with me.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: Again, it's this tension of like what's an honest starting spot?
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: What do you actually have capacity for?
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: Not shaming yourself?
• 25:28
  Speaker 1: This isn't performance.
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: Like an honest starting part.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: And then like, if you upgrade a bit, so I'm like, okay, I'm not going to say that I always have to bring my kids or it's always Saturday morning.
• 25:36
  Speaker 1: I'm just going to like, part of my goal is never to waste food.
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: So like in this shift, like that would not have been on my radar years ago.
• 25:43
  Speaker 1: But there's some.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: I read the other day like 40% of food waste globally is from, like, personal kitchens or something like that.
• 25:50
  Speaker 1: I'm like, oh my gosh, that's so true.
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: I'm like what would it look like on an individual, personalized level if we committed to trying to find sources for the food we're not going to use and actually not throwing away or wasting food?
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: In my American, western world, mom, suburban life, instantly my hesitations, just as an individual, is like, do I have the time?
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: That would take energy.
• 26:11
  Speaker 1: I could want to do that, but then I never actually put it on my schedule.
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: And I think just even the awareness of if something, if you're going to, if something's actually a priority, you have to plan it, you know.
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: So we've been trying to take the meals.
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: I would say we average twice a month, maybe the last couple of months.
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: So again, newbie kindergarten phase over here.
• 26:31
  Speaker 1: But it's been cool having the kids now again the fruit of it in our own lives is their awareness, and upgrade from here is eventually actually praying or bridging the gap between Jesus and then just the food.
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: But I think it was really important for me to experience just the service and I think again I know I'm going to challenge it one more time but it has been integral for me, not just because we participate in our church's outreach things.
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: They do a huge banquet for anyone who's in need.
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: They feed like 2,000 people or something every Christmas, or they have different options that we'll volunteer me and the kids will do.
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: So we do those.
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: But there's something entirely more relational and deeper forming when it's me and them, with our friend that we've met, when it's not through another organization, when it's the ownership.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: Therefore, like the depth that it can actually shape you and that the Holy Spirit is like forming you is so different when it's you, you and the person there's.
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: There's just a I was gonna say personalness to it, but I guess it'd be like the difference of only doing corporate prayer versus praying by yourself, like having your own prayer life and conversations with the Lord.
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's probably the best analogy of the difference.
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: It's felt how much more substantial shaping and the Lord's speaking through it, versus when we do it corporately.
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: So that's been our little upgrade, but I mean, so my question to you is like what is something you could do, even if it's sporadic, like that would be more personal.
• 28:22
  Speaker 1: That's you led.
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: Could you make one PB&J and give it away a week?
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: What element of service in your own personal life?
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: And if you have kids, that's awesome.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: I do have to give a disclaimer.
• 28:35
  Speaker 1: I told the story on another episode, but we went the other day to try to give the food to the normal places that we find people, and there weren't.
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: And then I was like, oh, there's a bunch of people over there by that shop entrance and I just felt funky and I was like, ah, there's a little, I think something, the odds happening, I'm going to go somewhere else.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: And the kids were like, why, mom?
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: And then, as they said that, a bunch of police cars pulled in and ended up hustling out and clearly there was something happening, I'm like, okay, holy Spirit, thank you for that.
• 29:06
  Speaker 1: But anyways, so giving you some ideas about what you possibly could do, like as you're thinking for yourself, like what is something your life instead of?
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: Like I think of it almost truly like breaking off part of my bread and sharing it with someone.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: I asked some of my friends who are better at this than me and who have done it again, like this local, who some of them are what inspired me to incorporate my kids.
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: I mean all of them.
• 29:28
  Speaker 1: These ladies were the ones I was like you guys are good at this.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: Tell me what you do.
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: So I'm going to give you a list of a few, like basic ones when you're kind of brainstorming like options that you could have for a habit, for this.
• 29:37
  Speaker 1: Okay, so I texted my girlfriends who are good at this and have done this for a while.
• 29:42
  Speaker 1: I went to the middle schoolers of this habit and asked them for some of the things they do.
• 29:47
  Speaker 1: One of my friends says she keeps granola bars in the car at all times and she actually gets her kids to give them out with her and what she emphasized like she's always with them.
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: Of course, she says guidance is necessary, but I purposely make sure they look them in the eyes, say hello, because I want them to recognize them as human beings.
• 30:09
  Speaker 1: Then another thing she does is she sets up hot chocolate at our local library because that's a big place for homeless people to hang out and the kids would go and hand it out and we'd pray for people.
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: Other times they've gathered hats, scarves or blankets to let people pick through as they're going around.
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: She actually, she's so cool, she'll just shoot out texts like any spare, like as you're getting out your winter stuff, anything that your kids outgrow or any extra blankets from last year you're getting rid of, keep them for me so that we can give them away.
• 30:35
  Speaker 1: So just like things like that, where she then, when she by those texts, it has planted seeds in my head of like, oh yeah, like what could we be doing?
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: Um, some, yeah, and they'll go to the library during the day and give the extra warm stuff, some.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: Her mother-in-law just gets a giant pack of socks and actually hands those out to homeless people at corners.
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: Um, oh.
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: And she says she'll do this on Thanksgiving and Christmas to combat the typical American materialistic only mindset that usually involves those holidays.
• 31:09
  Speaker 1: And she's served at the local mission a few times with her son on purpose, because she wants him to hear the conversations and not just assume that is a drug or alcohol problem that got them there.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: She wants him to know the fullness of the heartbreak and tragedy that sometimes, and when she says fullness, obviously she'll probably edit it or help him, but she said he was blown away by how many people had lost their house in a fire and just showing him how multifaceted it can be for why people live there.
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: And then she's actually the friend.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: A couple of years ago we took a mom and me missions trip to Mexico to build a house and it's because she's this she lived there, for she's built 50 houses with the organization.
• 31:49
  Speaker 1: Truly, she lived there for a few years but she took her son, who's Audrey's age, and was telling, telling me when she got back how impactful it was for him and that was actually probably one of the first actual habits of us being with the poor that we had.
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, I want to do that.
• 32:05
  Speaker 1: But if I'm honest, I feel a little chagrined to remember thinking Audrey needs this, she needs to be exposed to this and probably, like I think it was like six hours in the first day on the job site, I just felt the Holy Spirit, sweet correction of like, oh, audrey's not the only one who needs this, like this is actually for you and this like recalibration of awareness and gratitude for what you live and how wealthy you are is also for you, and then that fast forward into the fasting.
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so that's kind of more of the history.
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: So when she, when this friend, shared about it, then I was like, okay, we need to do that and she and I are actually leading a family trip to build a house in 2026.
• 32:43
  Speaker 1: Cause, like I said, it's so helpful when you have friends who are better at this or better in different areas than you, to just pick their brain, to be honest and be like, hey, it feels overwhelming or it feels scary.
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: Can you break down some of the little things you started with?
• 32:56
  Speaker 1: Or what are some ideas like going to friends?
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: She also let's see the hot chocolate.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: I was trying to think of Um, but purpose purposely.
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: When we hand anything out, we want to give people value and speak to them and talk.
• 33:15
  Speaker 1: Talk to them like humans and have a conversation, versus just dropping it and leaving Um if someone's outside of the store.
• 33:22
  Speaker 1: I also I usually ask if we could buy something they need, um, and then bring the item back as well.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: If we could buy something they need and then bring the item back as well, and then, even if we don't have something in passing, we say hello.
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: She said one of the big emphasis is for us is to not treat the poor as if they don't have dignity or they are something to be afraid of.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's so good.
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: One of my other friends was saying that they'll have female products on hand or deodorant that they'll hand out when they come to different places, so that it's like they don't have to plan ahead but if they end up at a store or something they'll offer them in the summer.
• 34:00
  Speaker 1: Christmas day after we opened up a presence, we would go get a few, like what we've done for a few years is.
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: She said that they got Dutch bro gift cards and would go hand them out to people to kind of also balance out the Christmas mentality with their kids, and I was like, oh, that's so good.
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: So I hope that's helped.
• 34:19
  Speaker 1: I hope that you got a few potential ideas for what you could do.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: But even frankly, as simple as, like I said, sharing meal, just making a commitment, like my kind of own internal commitment, is that now having a bit of a habit.
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: It's almost like most habits have two parts.
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: So on Friday, assessing what leftovers we have and then deciding, making the time to schedule on Saturday when I'll be able to go, take them to share with them.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: And even frankly, like in the idea of I can't remember where I read that.
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: I read somewhere about like the one of the most important things you could do is to approach the situation with dignity, like there, it's not something you're doing, it's like common humanity.
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: You know, human to human interaction.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: So that's been really helpful.
• 35:05
  Speaker 1: But it's been cool, even the simpleness of I give them choices.
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: So I'm, I'm like, hey, would you like a stir fry or spaghetti?
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: I have two things.
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: Would you like a lunch?
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: And then I also say like um, again, that's kind of where the whole thing.
• 35:17
  Speaker 1: But I say, um, I wanted to share, we had some extra dinner, we wanted to share with you or share lunch, or I, just, in my heart, posture for myself and with the like human to humanness.
• 35:29
  Speaker 1: I purposely have called it our sharing habit.
• 35:32
  Speaker 1: And then it helps with the language.
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: And then it's cool because now, when the kids, when we see people on benches or around our walk, they're like, oh, mom, we need to circle back and bring water bottles, or do you have anything we could give.
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, like, okay, as their awareness change.
• 35:50
  Speaker 1: It's changing me too, versus kind of like the don't be interrupted or we don't see them, mentality of like, oh, this is so important, and I have to say that I think with all habits, when people ask, like, what's the key to longevity, I would say the same answer is true, for how do you make habits like this, that are like either spiritual disciplines or Jesus habits, however you want to call it?
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: How do you keep them out of being performing or religious spirit?
• 36:16
  Speaker 1: You know, like, how do you keep your heart posture in a spot where they're an overflow of love, not a religious task?
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: You're taking off, you know, and for me it is knowing what my why is behind it and actually reminding myself repeatedly.
• 36:34
  Speaker 1: So I've been sharing for like a year and a half and there are days where I'm heating up my food and his food at the same point and I'm annoyed.
• 36:43
  Speaker 1: I'm just being so honest with you guys here, no pretense.
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: I feel inconvenienced.
• 36:50
  Speaker 1: I'm like I don't even know if he likes this.
• 36:52
  Speaker 1: He doesn't.
• 36:53
  Speaker 1: Let me talk to him about Jesus.
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: Is this working?
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: Like?
• 36:55
  Speaker 1: All these things like that are going through my head and then whatever.
• 37:00
  Speaker 1: So, as I'm heating it up and I remember like hey, that's, it's like my red flag, with those thoughts of like hey, I think this is, I think you're losing the heart behind the habit, and that's that's when it doesn't.
• 37:13
  Speaker 1: It's almost like not serving its purpose.
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: You know, it'd be like using I don't know a bike to dry your clothes.
• 37:18
  Speaker 1: You're like sure you can't do that, but you're losing a lot of the functionality by doing that.
• 37:24
  Speaker 1: So like I stop and I have to do this so often because if I go on autopilot, it's just a religious task, but if I connect with the heart, which is simply connecting with Jesus most of the time when I do it.
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: But I remember this one time I was like so annoyed and I was like nope, nope, this is done.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: You either should stop doing this or actually connect your heart to it so that, like it's engaged with why you're doing it.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: And I just stopped and I like remind myself, I'm like you said that if we take a minute to feed the poor, that it's like feeding you.
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: So like I and I just I have to preach to myself, like I have to remind myself and like vision cast and it's not instant.
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: I think sometimes we think our hearts.
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: You know, you know why.
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: And then it stays there.
• 38:06
  Speaker 1: My heart, my experience with my own heart is that it's like falls out of gear.
• 38:08
  Speaker 1: It's in the right gear and then it slips out of gear and I have to put it back in and then we were good for a week or two and then it slips out of gear again.
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: I'm like okay, and I have to go back.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: And that's what I think of when I'm like coaching myself and I'm like okay, actually.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: And then I get to this point.
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: I remember this specific like I felt the Holy Spirit so strong and it really actually became this act of worship and I was like it's okay if he doesn't eat it, it's okay if he seems like it's silly that I'm giving him like.
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I feel like I'm like am I inconveniencing you?
• 38:38
  Speaker 1: Like he's oddly aloof.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: Like when you've been friends with someone for a year and a half, it's not like the honeymoon phase is over, I know his quirks.
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: Moon phase is over, I know his quirks, he knows my quirks.
• 38:46
  Speaker 1: Like he calls me out, like it's yeah, so it's not yeah.
• 38:54
  Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm just like is this even working, you know?
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: And then I just shifted into like, after a bit of like reconnecting with the purpose.
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: I was like, okay, I'm actually going to believe that this is worship.
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: And in this moment, this act of worship is actually costing me more than most Sunday mornings when I'm at front of my church.
• 39:11
  Speaker 1: And it's awesome worship.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: I go to a church with great worship.
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: It's literally like concert quality I mean in the sense of musician, wise but the presence of the Lord is so strong and I still sometimes have to make myself mentally be present to worship.
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: That costs me so much less than this moment where I'm going to take 30 minutes and be interrupted and be inconvenienced and have to actually get to my heart, my spot to a heart.
• 39:35
  Speaker 1: It's like dragging my heart along with me and I'm like, oh, this act of worship actually costs more than that does.
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: And again, it's not like a hierarchy value, not being weird like that, but I was like, oh, it actually reminded me again, this is how you keep a habit from being religious is like keeping your heart engaged with it and keeping it as an expression and an overflow of love.
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: One of the most dangerous prayers you could ever pray let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: And I think, going back to the four principles of being for the poor, advocating but then letting yourself let your heart be broken and then go have it.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: Evidence of that or living it out, is then taking action by being with the poor.
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: That'll form you.
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: And then let's see, there's this great prayer by Teresa a saint, some St Teresa of a veil Christ has no body now on earth but yours, no hands.
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: But yours, no feet, but yours.
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: Yours are the eyes through which the compassion of Christ must look out on the world.
• 40:45
  Speaker 1: And I think this habit just has recalibrated my pace of my life and made me try to keep margin so that I can see with eyes of compassion, like see those around me in need.
• 41:01
  Speaker 1: Because it's so much easier I always think of the Samaritan story to cross the road and continue on my way because I'm going to be late for practice, or it's really hot, or the kids are in the car or whatever.
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: I'm like it is so easy to be one of the Pharisees and not be the Samaritan.
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: But if you recalibrate, you're like, oh, but I actually want to be matured, to have my normal be eyes of compassion, and I'm not there yet.
• 41:29
  Speaker 1: So if you guys are, you can write in and tell me give me some habit hacks how you're able to keep your heart in that gear all the time.
• 41:35
  Speaker 1: But there is another great line that I love From generation to generation, god has heard the cries of the poor and the oppressed, the ones who are sex trafficked, the refugees, the orphans.
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: He's heard their cries and his people, again and again, ask who will go, but it's not God who ignores the heart cries of the poor.
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: It's us you and me are brothers and sisters.
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: His people around the world, and I think the idea of again, if you couple that with where his body, his hands, his feet, and then knowing the injustice, I'm like, oh, am I doing anything with it?
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: Though?
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: And again, this is not sorry, it's such a sensitive subject.
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: It's probably why I was reluctant to record this episode.
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: I was like I didn't want you to think I was awesome, nor do I want you to walk away with a lot of heaviness or shame.
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: My goal would be that you, the Holy Spirit in you, would feel like a crack of curiosity and like an invitation to like.
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: What would it look like to make a habit, to make more margin, so that you see through eyes of compassion and that you move towards creating some kind of a rhythm to be with support.
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: The Lord could use it for them, of course.
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: Beautiful, helping be as hand to feet, but then also the fruit that you're going to get as you're shaped.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: It reminds me of sandpaper.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: You will come out more smooth and looking like him, even if you're doing it like me, poorly.
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so I hope that helps.
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to say one more time the book I'm reading out of is Dirty Glory, pete Gregg.
• 43:11
  Speaker 1: If you liked it, it was so good.
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: He definitely made me cry.
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: He's a good author.
• 43:16
  Speaker 1: It was a fabulous read.
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: I'll read it again.
• 43:18
  Speaker 1: But yeah, my hope is that you think of something.
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: My friend's list of options could be as simple as making a PB&J, but doing something where you actually set up a habit, where there's a rhythm, where you create the space to be the Samaritan or be the hands and feet so that you could be the answer to someone's prayer.
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: Not again, not in that white savior way, but I think sometimes we err too far on I'm not saying that and then we shut the door and have no room for being literally like sharing with the poor.
• 43:51
  Speaker 1: So that is the last episode in our series.
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: I love you.
• 43:56
  Speaker 1: I'm going to pray for you.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: It just feels like it'd be way better to end with some Holy Spirit than just Jenna's words.
• 44:04
  Speaker 1: Holy Spirit, I thank you.
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: I thank you that your job is to complete the work you've started in us and I thank you that you love process and like that analogy of us being clay in your hands.
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: It's slow, it's meticulous, it's detailed, it's gentle, but it's like this constant shaping and forming.
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: So I pray that everyone listening God would just get what you would highlight and peak some level of an invitation to experiment with habits, of sharing with the poor in a way that will shape them and bring unexpected roots and maturity and beautiful, like new connection with you and them in a whole new way.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: We thank you that there's not condemnation that any invitation from you comes with a chance to upgrade.
• 44:58
  Speaker 1: It looks like it would just cost, but that's not how the kingdom works.
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: There's more that is unseen or even with our limited understanding, we won't see the fullness of the impact.
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: So, as we trust you as a good and kind dad, we know that if we go after this there is going to be ramifications that we can't even imagine.
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: So we just say yes to the process, we say no to condemnation and we just what is a small, simple step that we can take to partner with you in this process?
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: Amen.