Latest / Conscious Mastery: The Science and Spirituality of Creating Your Next Level in Life / Stop Playing It Safe: Step-by-Step Guide to Getting What You Want

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Stop Playing It Safe: Step-by-Step Guide to Getting What You Want · Conscious Mastery: The Science and Spirituality of Creating Your Next Level in Life

• 0:18
  SPEAKER_00: Hello and welcome back to Conscious Mastery.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: I am your host, Crystal Ward, intuitive life coach and energy healer, and this podcast is all about the science and spirituality of getting to your next level in life.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: Today I'm gonna actually walk you through a workshop that I did live through what I call the expansion lounges, those are roughly every month free live workshops.
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: And this one was about walking yourself through your edge, the edge basically of your comfort zone.
• 0:48
  SPEAKER_00: I'm gonna talk about two of the things that I find prevent people from being able to walk through their edge when they hit that resistance, that fear, all of that, all of those limiting ideas that come up of who we are, what we feel like we're capable of, that can prevent us from going through that edge and walking ourselves quite literally into our next level.
• 1:10
  SPEAKER_00: Because what we want, the reason the comfort zone is so scary is because we're comfortable in the zone we are in, but what we want because what we don't have is on the other side of that.
• 1:20
  SPEAKER_00: So how I was describing it in the workshop was that imagine you are in a green patch of land.
• 1:27
  SPEAKER_00: There is a fence, and on the other side of that fence is that other side of what you want.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: Not that the grass is greener, but we want something we don't have, right?
• 1:37
  SPEAKER_00: So it kind of feels like it is greener.
• 1:39
  SPEAKER_00: And that fence separating it is the edge that we walk up against.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_00: That is our resistance, the edge of our comfort zone.
• 1:47
  SPEAKER_00: So the two things that I have found in work with myself and work with my clients is they are identity pieces.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: So the first one, and I'm gonna give you a story to illustrate each of these and how they were affecting my life and what happened when I broke through them.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, so the first one is who we believe we are, and the second one is what we believe we can do or have.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_00: These are both so identity, identity is where we are is always because of our current identity.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_00: Life is an identity up-leveling journey, especially if you are like me and you're an entrepreneur.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_00: I thought I was gonna be opening a business and just helping people, right?
• 2:30
  SPEAKER_00: No, not at all.
• 2:31
  SPEAKER_00: Apparently, entrepreneurship is personal development on crazy steroids.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_00: I also had a baby about six months before I became an entrepreneur, and I gotta say, I had never been a mother before, but that came way more naturally than being an entrepreneur, and I know many entrepreneurs here could agree with me.
• 2:53
  SPEAKER_00: So the first story about so I'm gonna talk to you about two stories, one from each of those identity situations, and how when I went through my resistance, what happened on the other side?
• 3:04
  SPEAKER_00: So the first one, who we believe we are, who I believed I was.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_00: I recently attended a podcasting conference in Charlotte, North Carolina.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_00: That was not only my first podcasting conference, but my first business conference ever.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_00: And I have had my business for almost seven years.
• 3:20
  SPEAKER_00: I did start it right before COVID, so it's not like there was a lot of stuff I could go to, and then in my mind, um, you know, because the world was shut down and no one did anything, and Zoom became really popular.
• 3:31
  SPEAKER_00: So I've just been used to hosting all my workshops on Zoom, attending everybody's everything on Zoom.
• 3:37
  SPEAKER_00: So I hadn't really stretched my mind into like, oh, there's real real things in real life that we can go to.
• 3:43
  SPEAKER_00: So this podcast conference was a big heck yes for me to go to.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_00: And I am a trained intuitive, so I made sure to do enough intuitive questions on if this invest like what I wanted to get out of it, checked in with intuition on if I would get that out of the investment.
• 3:59
  SPEAKER_00: I got a yes for everything I asked for, but the big overall message was really cool.
• 4:03
  SPEAKER_00: Um, it was all about the community that I was going to experience and then become a part of.
• 4:08
  SPEAKER_00: So on my way down was when I experienced this resistance to my what was my current edge, and my the beliefs that were coming up for me was that who, you know, who am I to not to be going to this, but there was so there were a lot of what spurred this whole thing was there were not only the conference panels where you have a few people speaking up on stage doing a little Q ⁇ A as well, and then the keynote speakers and the workshop speakers and speakers of all sorts, but there were networking events, um, mixers, little happy hours.
• 4:45
  SPEAKER_00: So there were multiple events that I had the option to attend.
• 4:49
  SPEAKER_00: And I don't know if you've ever it's kind of like it reminded me of when I went to mute used to go to music festivals.
• 4:54
  SPEAKER_00: You there's a whole list of people who are going to be performing.
• 4:58
  SPEAKER_00: Before you even buy your ticket, you're like, there's like a hundred that you want to make sure you go to.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_00: So I kind of had that same mentality when I bought this.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, oh, well, obviously, of course I'm gonna go to everything, right?
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_00: And when we're in that really excited, exciting phase of attending something, getting tickets to something.
• 5:15
  SPEAKER_00: So with music festivals, you know, you'd get there and you're like, oh well, it's so hot.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_00: I'd rather just like hang out in the shade where I'm at, or oh my gosh, I'm so tired from partying until seven in the morning.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_00: It's fine if I miss this act that was one of the main reasons that I got my ticket.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_00: So we come up with a lot of I mean, they're reasonable.
• 5:34
  SPEAKER_00: They're they're not just excuses, but like these pretty good reasons as to why we want to shift our plans.
• 5:39
  SPEAKER_00: So on my way down, I was like, wait a minute, I don't have to go to the networking events and the happy hours and the mixers and everything.
• 5:46
  SPEAKER_00: Like, I could just go to the conference, um, the panels and the speaks and get the information I came for.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_00: And then I was like, wait a minute, why am I feeling this way now?
• 5:59
  SPEAKER_00: Why was I so certain that I was going to attend every event that they had, and now I'm convincing myself that it's okay to attend the speaks, the uh speakers, and then go back up to my room after eating dinner and just watching something on my laptop.
• 6:15
  SPEAKER_00: But let's be real, I wouldn't actually watch something on my laptop unless it's a class, but I could just go back up to my hotel room and do some work or something.
• 6:22
  SPEAKER_00: I'm sure I'll be inspired.
• 6:24
  SPEAKER_00: So I realized that my edge was showing up as a not only had I never been to a business conference, not only have I not ever even made$100,000 in my business total in seven years.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_00: So I'm not showing up as like some, you know, high-powered, really successful business person, like I know a lot of these people were.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_00: Um, but also I was a new podcaster.
• 6:45
  SPEAKER_00: So it's not like I was some person with a bunch of information where I could then share with a bunch of people and help other people.
• 6:52
  SPEAKER_00: I was really coming as like this, what I felt like this, you know, new little entrepreneur who started her new little podcast and like she's coming to learn stuff.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_00: So I told myself, Crystal, you are going to go to every event, every mixer, every networking event, every happy hour.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_00: You're gonna show up and you're not gonna die.
• 7:13
  SPEAKER_00: That was what my brain was telling me, like, oh my god, I could die.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_00: That's what our brains are always telling us, you guys, when we are coming up with to these fears, these limiting perceptions.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_00: Our brain wants to keep us safe because it actually thinks our nervous system actually thinks that it is a threat to our survival.
• 7:28
  SPEAKER_00: So I told myself, this is your comfort zone.
• 7:31
  SPEAKER_00: And this was actually the moment where I kind of birthed this workshop or this whole idea, this moment of an idea was why I created the identity edge workshop.
• 7:40
  SPEAKER_00: And um, yeah, so I was like, this is it.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_00: I know that what I want, whatever I want, is on the other side of attending these events.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_00: So I go and I met a new one of the speakers.
• 7:54
  SPEAKER_00: She talked about using your frequency to amplify your voice as a podcaster.
• 7:59
  SPEAKER_00: So very energetic and spiritual based, along with the science.
• 8:03
  SPEAKER_00: I love that she does what I do and she backed up with science.
• 8:06
  SPEAKER_00: Um, we ended up becoming really close friends.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_00: We talk almost every day still.
• 8:10
  SPEAKER_00: And on Friday night, the second night of the the conference, um, we were all most of us were all staying in the same hotel room.
• 8:19
  SPEAKER_00: And by the end of the night, mm everybody had gone to bed except two.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_00: So there's the founder of the conference, and then there's the two people who um have enlisted that he they are the two helpers, the two main helpers of the of the conference, and they were still up and they invited me to hang out.
• 8:37
  SPEAKER_00: So I got to go to their um one of their hotel's rooms, and the three of us hung out for a couple of hours, and I got to not only, you know, learn some cool, just hear some insider scoop into the conference, the back end of the conference, but I got to learn about these podcasters' businesses and their coaching businesses.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_00: And what was really cool for me is that I knew going into this conference, I was going to have a chance to see how my creator field, my you could call it your manifestation field, your energy field that I talk about in the last episode, how your energy field is actually um influencing what and how you attract.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_00: But I was like, I'm gonna go into this thing and I get this conference and I'm gonna see how how my creator field's doing.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_00: How do people respond to me?
• 9:24
  SPEAKER_00: And I got to show up in this group of three people where a year ago, two years ago, I probably would have felt like such an imposter, but I showed up as myself and contributed quite normally to the conversation with other business people who I looked at as more successful than me, but it I didn't feel like I had any reason to not be there and not be who I was.
• 9:42
  SPEAKER_00: So it was really cool, and they it's podcasters are apparently really cool people.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_00: Um, shocker, right?
• 9:49
  SPEAKER_00: They were really cool people, so it's not like they were buttoned up, stuffy business people who you might have, you know, in your mind who I had in my mind who would be at a business conference.
• 9:58
  SPEAKER_00: They were just some really cool dudes.
• 10:01
  SPEAKER_00: So that was my who I believe I am identity edge.
• 10:05
  SPEAKER_00: And then, oh, and then I actually became friends with the founder of the conference, and we are working with each other.
• 10:14
  SPEAKER_00: So that's a mind blower.
• 10:16
  SPEAKER_00: That's an absolute mind blower.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_00: So our beliefs, our identity is going to be challenged when we come up with these, come to these situations of resistance when we think we are not the person who could do that.
• 10:28
  SPEAKER_00: Who am I to do that?
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_00: Who am I to do that?
• 10:31
  SPEAKER_00: But if you do it, you are gonna surprise yourself.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_00: I'm I'm guarantee if I could surprise myself like that, you can surprise yourself like that.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_00: So the second is what we believe we can do or have.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'll try to make this story a little shorter, but when I was really, really struggling in my business about two years ago, I was I really wanted to go to the gym on a regular, consistent basis.
• 10:54
  SPEAKER_00: I've always loved the gym ever since high school and working out, even when I wasn't playing sports, which I haven't played sports in a decade or two.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_00: And I but I was instead of letting myself go to the gym or go on walks or do physical stuff, I was making myself work on my business.
• 11:11
  SPEAKER_00: Not that I didn't enjoy it.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_00: We s we do things that we enjoy, right?
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_00: So I loved working on my business, taking classes, um, having coaches, being in peer groups, just whatever I was doing, a lot of doing stuff, creating content, making posts, blah, blah, blah.
• 11:27
  SPEAKER_00: So much stuff to where I would I would stay up until three in the morning.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_00: And then I would go to my wake up in the morning, work, work in the afternoon, go to my night job, my serving job at a restaurant, and then come back home and work on my business and go to sleep.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_00: So obviously I had plenty of time to be going to the gym, and but what I was believing that what I could do was that I do and have is I can only have a successful business if I do, which was work endlessly on the freaking business and deny myself of other areas of life.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_00: So eventually what happened was the pendulum swung the other way.
• 12:06
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, this isn't working.
• 12:07
  SPEAKER_00: I've been doing this for fucking four or five years and it is not working.
• 12:11
  SPEAKER_00: I do not have consistent clients, I do not even have consistent leads.
• 12:15
  SPEAKER_00: It's not like people were reaching out, like, oh, oh, I kind of want to work with you, and then shying away was like, mm, lots of crickets for a long time.
• 12:22
  SPEAKER_00: So I was like, screw this, I'm going to the gym.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_00: And the first week that I went to the gym, it was either two or three times.
• 12:28
  SPEAKER_00: I signed my highest paying client for a 12-week package, highest paying client to that date, two years ago ever in my business.
• 12:37
  SPEAKER_00: And then she re-enrolled 12 weeks later for another one.
• 12:41
  SPEAKER_00: So that was clearly a flaw in what I thought I needed to do in order to have my identity.
• 12:48
  SPEAKER_00: I have a very hard-working identity.
• 12:50
  SPEAKER_00: You have to work, you have to work.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_00: Work hard, work hard, work hard, which is great.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_00: I have an incredible work ethic, but it can be a little too much.
• 12:56
  SPEAKER_00: So my edge was actually taking care of other parts of my life that I felt like I was neglecting.
• 13:02
  SPEAKER_00: So, what I want you to do, and pause this, I don't normally want to, you know, encourage you to pause it, but pause it if you don't have something already in mind.
• 13:10
  SPEAKER_00: And that something in mind is what is your current comfort zone?
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_00: What is an edge where an identity, I call it an identity edge, because like I said, it's the identity pieces that are preventing us from going through that comfort zone.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_00: So, what's that edge on this current side that you're on of your comfort zone that where you have the resistance in the way of what you want?
• 13:32
  SPEAKER_00: So I was talking with one client a while ago and she really wants to, she wants to grow her business and she really wants to go to networking events.
• 13:39
  SPEAKER_00: And I did an intuitive read for her, a pool that said networking events were really gonna help her.
• 13:44
  SPEAKER_00: She hasn't gone to them as far as I haven't, I don't know, maybe she has recently, but I so an example of this would be her.
• 13:53
  SPEAKER_00: She, we would what we would do if we continued to work more on that topic.
• 13:57
  SPEAKER_00: That was just a single session, which I do offer single sessions, but if we were actually, you know, package clients like six weeks or 12 weeks, what we would do next is uncover what has been stopping her from going to those networking events, looking at the identity pieces, working on the identity pieces, rewiring those negative beliefs of I'm not good enough, who am I to do it, and then get her to the networking event so that she can have what she wants.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_00: So name your name your next level desire.
• 14:25
  SPEAKER_00: Go ahead and literally tell it to yourself.
• 14:27
  SPEAKER_00: Some questions you could think about are what am I being called to do?
• 14:33
  SPEAKER_00: Who am I being called to be?
• 14:36
  SPEAKER_00: What do I want?
• 14:37
  SPEAKER_00: Like simply, what do I want?
• 14:39
  SPEAKER_00: Include feelings.
• 14:41
  SPEAKER_00: What do I want, but I am fearing and resisting it?
• 14:45
  SPEAKER_00: So ask yourself, name the resistance.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_00: So and you can describe it in describe it in your body if you want.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_00: So when I thought about going to all of those networking events, like you know, weeks after I got the tickets, and it was really hitting me that I was going, um, I was I could feel it in my body.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_00: My heartbeat sped up a little bit.
• 15:06
  SPEAKER_00: I could tell my palms were getting a little sweaty.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_00: I was driving down there, it was a seven-hour drive, and I could tell my breath was getting a little shorter.
• 15:13
  SPEAKER_00: So my body was already, as my brain was thinking about doing it, my body was already experiencing the feeling of doing it.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_00: So, what feelings come up for you when you think about the decisions you would have to make, the person you would have to be in order to walk yourself through this.
• 15:31
  SPEAKER_00: If you see me on video, my cat is attacking me right now.
• 15:34
  SPEAKER_00: Um, name the fear.
• 15:36
  SPEAKER_00: What feels dangerous about this?
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_00: So, for me, for the um Empowered Podcasting Conference, it would be what feels dangerous?
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to be exposed as a nobody.
• 15:47
  SPEAKER_00: I am going to not have the words to say when I'm around people.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_00: And by the way, I had conversations with 80% of the people there.
• 15:55
  SPEAKER_00: The conversations flowed like water.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_00: There it was, they were so it was so fun.
• 15:59
  SPEAKER_00: They were such fun conversations.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_00: So my brain was telling me, You're not gonna have you're not gonna have anything to relate to them about, but we talked about movies, we talked about music, we talked about just life, we talked about parenting.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_00: The con it was it was amazing.
• 16:14
  SPEAKER_00: So what feels dangerous about this?
• 16:17
  SPEAKER_00: Now there is there is a almost like a formula.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: I wrote it down.
• 16:23
  SPEAKER_00: Let me look at my notes.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_00: Okay, so you've got it's a model, your desire, which is the next level, and then your edge.
• 16:32
  SPEAKER_00: And what comes up at your edge is your old pattern.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_00: And then to transform that old pattern is a choice.
• 16:39
  SPEAKER_00: It is a choice to experience yourself as a new identity, new beliefs about yourself, and new beliefs about what you can do and how you can have what you want differently, right?
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_00: How I could have the business success that I want in a different way from working myself to death.
• 16:58
  SPEAKER_00: So that that's your old story.
• 17:00
  SPEAKER_00: Look up your old story.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_00: I am only valuable if I'm working, if I'm conforming, if I'm doing, doing, doing, or the old story is I'm too shy, I'm not good enough.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_00: The old story could be situations from your past.
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_00: Well, I did this in the past and it didn't work out, and blah blah the old stuff that we convince ourselves why the past still has such a hold on us.
• 17:22
  SPEAKER_00: We are not our past though.
• 17:24
  SPEAKER_00: What does my current identity believe that I have to do to be safe, worthy, accepted, successful, loved?
• 17:31
  SPEAKER_00: Whatever those old stories are, let them come up for you right now.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_00: This is kind of a workshop style episode, so feel free to pause again and really sit with it.
• 17:40
  SPEAKER_00: And if you're in the car driving right now or you're you got your AirPods on at the grocery store, come back to it.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_00: Come come back to this because it what if you really do this work, really do this inner work, you're gonna you're gonna walk through your edge and you're going to see how you can literally create very quickly what you want that you don't have.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_00: We always have what we want subconsciously, so this is a way to intentionally create what you don't have.
• 20:06
  SPEAKER_00: And if you want one-on-one support with this, I am a life coach.
• 20:10
  SPEAKER_00: I have one-on-one services.
• 20:12
  SPEAKER_00: I'm not doing group programs yet, so this is a great way to utilize me completely in a personalized way with intuitive guidance for your life.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_00: And yeah, we could we could go really deep with this.
• 20:26
  SPEAKER_00: So you can find my services page at my website, crystalward.com slash services.
• 20:31
  SPEAKER_00: If you want to book a single session, there's a link right there.
• 20:34
  SPEAKER_00: If you want, if you're thinking about a deep dive into six or twelve weeks, feel free to just fill out the contact form and I will be in touch with you.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_00: And that's K-R-Y-S-T-A-L-W-A-R-D.com.
• 20:44
  SPEAKER_00: I'll put the link in the show notes as well.
• 20:47
  SPEAKER_00: So once you've got that old story, think about what you are inter interpreting as danger that might just be unfamiliarity, uncomfortability in the unknown.
• 21:01
  SPEAKER_00: Where it's so easy to feel scared of the unknown because it's unknown.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_00: We've never been there.
• 21:06
  SPEAKER_00: I had never been to a business conference, I had never been in a room of a bunch of more successful podcasters.
• 21:12
  SPEAKER_00: So that danger to me was that I was going to just show up as this nobody, and my identity would and my sense of belonging would get what would be the word?
• 21:24
  SPEAKER_00: My sense of belonging would get um.
• 21:29
  SPEAKER_00: I don't know why I can't think of a word, but like shot down, I guess.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_00: I would be scared that I would just be thrown out of the room, which is not realistic, obviously.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_00: And if it's an old story that's coming up, if it's something where you think you are you've royally messed up in the past or something happened to you that you just have trouble getting over, do a little fair exchange exercise.
• 21:50
  SPEAKER_00: Fair exchange is when you come into balance, when you no longer feel indebted to the past, whether that's indebted from yourself, indebted from other people to other people, you feel like you owe someone, you feel like someone owes you, balance that shit out.
• 22:04
  SPEAKER_00: That's gonna change your life.
• 22:06
  SPEAKER_00: That is going to change your life.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_00: Take that old story and find everything positive that came from it.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_00: Because it is impossible that anything is 100% negative.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_00: If you think something is 100% negative, you do not have the whole picture.
• 22:19
  SPEAKER_00: And when it comes to stories of the past, a lot of the times our all the time, actually, our villains in our lives, not to excuse behavior, not to excuse abuse or whatever it is, but those are some of our biggest, most important lessons in our lives.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_00: If it's abuse, we are taught to stand up for ourselves.
• 22:38
  SPEAKER_00: We are taught to not take shit from other people.
• 22:41
  SPEAKER_00: We are taught to love ourselves.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_00: So if it's that old past wound, past story that is keeping you from that resistance into your next level, come into balance with it, come into fair exchange with it and see how that it is actually a catalyst to you becoming the identity who has even more of what you want, not just the little green pasture on the other side of your current fence, but the big, big desire you have for your life.
• 23:09
  SPEAKER_00: Now you are going to meet your future self.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_00: If I were already the person who had crossed this edge, how would I think about this situation?
• 23:17
  SPEAKER_00: So, me having crossed the edge of the conference, how am I look like how am I looking at who I was?
• 23:25
  SPEAKER_00: I love feeling like I am a different person than who that was.
• 23:29
  SPEAKER_00: I am very proud of her.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_00: I am very impressed with her because she she was the shy kid.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_00: I was the shy kid.
• 23:36
  SPEAKER_00: My one of my big obstacles in life is learning how to like essentially just have a fucking microphone.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_00: Not a microphone like I'm talking to you guys, but just be okay to speak my truth and just speak as Crystal authentically in front of other people.
• 23:52
  SPEAKER_00: I'm only like 65% of the way there to feel safe to say my honest opinions or thoughts or feelings in any situation.
• 24:00
  SPEAKER_00: So, but that goes to show you I used to be like 0.5%.
• 24:04
  SPEAKER_00: So I've been doing the work, continuing to do the work.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_00: So how how would you feel about the you now?
• 24:12
  SPEAKER_00: You on the other side of the edge, how would you feel about the you now?
• 24:16
  SPEAKER_00: Feel you know if you want to feel proud of yourself, if you want to feel just like I fucking did that, I can do anything, I can, I can go through challenges and hard times.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_00: And you really want to you want to be the person where the future you is giving yourself, you're giving yourself a pat on the back, you're clapping for yourself, you're cheering for yourself, because the you today, right now, that's the you that's getting yourself to the next you.
• 24:38
  SPEAKER_00: So you can't become the next you without the you now, for better or for worse.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_00: Keep that in mind, for better or for worse.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_00: Now take the smallest identity confirming action.
• 24:49
  SPEAKER_00: So this is not how do I completely transform my life and identity and have what I want all today, all tomorrow.
• 24:57
  SPEAKER_00: How do I just completely redesign myself?
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_00: No, and the reason we don't want to do that is because you want you can like feel into it, do a little meditation or something.
• 25:05
  SPEAKER_00: Yes, connect with your future and your future self, but you don't want to just completely snap yourself.
• 25:13
  SPEAKER_00: You want to bend yourself a little bit, but you when we snap ourselves, our nervous system gets just overwhelmed and shocked that um we might never, you know, ever want to touch this again.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_00: So instead, do what is one thing I can do today that gives my brain evidence that I am becoming this person.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_00: So for me, the when I went to the conference, the very, very first event that they had was the night that we arrived.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_00: So it was a three-day, three-day event.
• 25:44
  SPEAKER_00: Well, actually four, because Sunday had a brunch Friday night or Thursday night when we got there, you checked in, and then there was a book signing with some of the people who were some of the speakers there who had recently published books.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_00: And it was uh called Meet the Authors, and I got I signed in.
• 26:02
  SPEAKER_00: I was like, Oh, I just drove for seven hours, I could totally go down back to my hotel room, just chill out for the night.
• 26:08
  SPEAKER_00: But I was like, nope, you know what?
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_00: This is the one thing I can do today to give my brain evidence that I am becoming this person.
• 26:17
  SPEAKER_00: I'm going to so I went to the Meet the Authors event.
• 26:19
  SPEAKER_00: I met so many amazing people who successful podcasters, podcast editors, um, people who teach people how to have podcasts, and they were so generous with their time and their knowledge, and just clearly wanted to help me in those moments.
• 26:36
  SPEAKER_00: They didn't some of them gave me their books, some of them asked for my card for my podcast and just with a genuine interest.
• 26:43
  SPEAKER_00: But I was like, wow, had I not gone here, there's so many amazing tidbits that I would not have gotten.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_00: So thank you, Crystal, for walking yourself through the first part of your edge.
• 26:54
  SPEAKER_00: And then lastly, how are you going to stay accountable to committing?
• 26:58
  SPEAKER_00: This practice is going to be yours.
• 27:00
  SPEAKER_00: It is a very unique to you edge that you're trying to get through.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_00: Your comfort zone is unique to you, your identity is unique to you.
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_00: So, how can how can you stay accountable to committing?
• 27:11
  SPEAKER_00: It is, is it thinking about and doing some of this work every morning?
• 27:16
  SPEAKER_00: Or if you're like me and it's go, go, go from 5 30 a.m.
• 27:19
  SPEAKER_00: when I wake up to get my daughter ready for school and take her to school, you might have more time in the midday or after your children go to bed.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_00: Find a time that works for you to stay accountable to yourself.
• 27:31
  SPEAKER_00: I hope you enjoyed this work stop workshop style episode.
• 27:35
  SPEAKER_00: Again, if you want to work together one-on-one, that's crystalwar.com slash services.
• 27:41
  SPEAKER_00: Link is in the show notes.
• 27:42
  SPEAKER_00: And if you go to my website, just crystalward.com, you will also see a page for free workshops.
• 27:47
  SPEAKER_00: They're called the Expansion Lounge.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_00: Just sign up to go on the newsletter where I will announce future workshops if you want to do what we did here in a community.
• 27:56
  SPEAKER_00: I will talk to you next time.