Latest / Harder Than Life / 107: Women’s Empowerment & Healing w/ Mallory Campbell

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107: Women’s Empowerment & Healing w/ Mallory Campbell · Harder Than Life

• 0:07
  I'm Kelly Siegel, and this is Harder Than Life, a podcast about self-love, self-awareness, business, and health. We tell outrageous stories and boil everything down to simple, practical advice you can start using today. Let's get living. Today on the Harder Than Life podcast, we're joined by a true force of transformation, Mallory Campbell, as a certified trauma-informed master coach.
• 0:33
  Mallory has dedicated her life to helping women reclaim their identities, step into their full power, and become the quantum queens of their own lives. Through her retreats, workshops, and coaching, she changes the lives of women everywhere, helping them heal trauma, embrace their authentic selves, and create lasting impact. She's a mom of two, wife of 13 years, and the host of the Permission to Activate podcast, guiding women on a journey of self-discovery. Get ready for an inspiring conversation with an incredible Mallory Campbell.
• 1:02
  Thank you. I'm so excited to be here. Yeah. I had to read the intro because I've known you and I followed you and I'm a huge fan of you and your husband. And I'm going to tell you something I probably have never told you before, but the Harder Than Life brand and all the podcasts, everything was inspired by you and your husband. We grew up in similar neighborhoods. Everybody knows my journey that I grew up just off of 8 Mile and Warren. You were a city over and on about 10 years after me,
• 1:32
  You know, you can start your journey anywhere. And I just became, I found your husband on social media. We became friends. I was like, man, she is when you were on your destined to be podcast. I just, I binged. So I want to let you know that. Thank you for making the track all the way over here. Thank you for being you and everything you do is just fantastic. So I'm, I'm a big fan and I'm honored that you're here and I want to help you. Um,
• 1:59
  Spread your sheer and your goodwill, but it hasn't always been this great. Now, you're a wife, you're a mother, you have a big, beautiful home, big, successful family, but it hasn't always been that way. So let's start off with what's your story and why does your story matter? And then we're going to get into the good stuff, which is so good.
• 2:20
  Yeah. And it's funny you say that about the podcast, because this is awesome. This is incredible. I love it. I love anytime I get an opportunity to do an in-person podcast, I'm there if I can make it happen, because you can just feel the energy. And I love that about in-person. But when we started the podcast, I actually didn't want to start the podcast. I was very much against it. So it's very funny that you say that.
• 2:41
  I remember when we first started recording back in, I want to say 2021, we almost like flipped our dining room table because we'd be fighting over me not wanting to show up on the podcast. So it started off as my husband's podcast. And then he's like, you're going to be on it too. And I'm like,
• 2:56
  No, I'm not. He's like, the hell you are. And I'm like, F this, all the things. And then we ended up having over 200 shows. So that was fun. But that's later down in my journey. I never missed a show. I listened to every single one of them. I used to text him. I remember. It was literally...
• 3:15
  It's literally what motivated me to do this. And yeah, the in-person thing was that we had to just step up. As you reach different levels, you meet different devils, and then we just have to keep up with our game. So sooner or later, we'll actually have a, this one's in my house, I stole my daughter's room.
• 3:30
  Um, so she gave it up as either I took the basement or I took this, but it's working. We're moving up. We, we, we've reached as high as number five. We're, we're between 25 and five and we're just going to get to number one and then we'll have our own studio. Yeah. But it was all inspired by you. So thank you. Yes. I'll get back to the question.
• 3:46
  Again, back to that question, though, I wanted to, because, and I'm going to get a little bit personal. I'm sure you expected some of this is, is your husband, uh, has been in and out of rehab years ago. He's many years sober, clean and sober now. 17 this year, I think. 17 years clean and sober. Yeah.
• 4:02
  But it hasn't always been that way. And you grew up and you saw him through this. So I'm going to tell you something even you don't know. I now have found my Mallory and she has my back and it feels great. But you had to do the work to receive and attract. That's what we're going to talk about. But the people that don't know Mallory Campbell, first of all, what is your social handles again? Just at Mallory Campbell. Real simple. So tell us the backstory. Include all the nitty gritty where you are today.
• 4:30
  All right. So I grew up in Fraser, not too far from here. Fraser, Michigan, little town, like two by two square miles. Like everyone knows everyone in Fraser. And you still like my sister lives there still. You go there and everyone still knows everybody. We don't live in Fraser anymore. However.
• 4:46
  So Jeremy and I, I'll kind of take it back. I grew up, I have a sister, mom and dad, since don't, I don't have a relationship with them anymore. It's been 10 years. My sister, yes, we just saw them yesterday, but kind of getting into high school. I was, I had a great time in high school. Jeremy, actually, it's really funny. You probably know this, but he actually used to use his fake ID by us alcoholic. That's where we started. He was always the guy, we called him Eddie Haskell. If you're familiar with like, can you see it? Like the leave it to Beaver, like very charismatic. Oh.
• 5:16
  always around doing really fun stuff. And we just became friends in high school. We were each dating somebody else. And long story short, he was starting to get in recovery, a couple rehab centers. I got a DUI when I was 18. I was up visiting a boyfriend at Central Michigan. And I came home and I was on like probation. So I was doing all the right things. I was following all the rules. I'm like, I'm not going to drive. I'm not going to,
• 5:41
  You know, I'm just going to do all the things they tell me I'm going to do. I'm like, I've had enough. Like, this is great. And he was just going into his fourth rehab, maybe. And we just became friends from that. And then we started dating shortly after that. I drove him to his last rehab center. And that's kind of how we started our journey together. Because people look at our lives and are like, oh, my gosh, like, you're only with him for this and this reason. I'm like, oh, my gosh, if you only knew the stuff that we had been through. We started dating when I was 18.
• 6:10
  And in and out of rehabs. And then he got sober and now it's 17 years later. And that's kind of the story of us. But for me, graduated high school, didn't really know what I wanted to do. I came out of the blue and I was like, I'm going to go to school for personal training. And my family was like, okay, that's kind of random, but sure, we'll support you.
• 6:27
  So I went to school for personal training and got a certificate. I went to like a year-long program, started training clients, worked at a Planet Fitness, and then I co-owned a fitness studio. I decided to go into business with a friend of mine. We opened a studio in Sterling Heights, Michigan. If anyone's familiar with that area, it's called Studio Z Fitness. I co-owned that for seven years. That was my...
• 6:48
  passion. I was there seven days a week teaching eight, nine classes, training clients. I just loved that part of my life. I taught Zumba fitness for over 10 years. Like dancing is a huge part of my life. My husband can't, he can't even like snap to the beat of the music. Like that's how much we differ in like our strengths. He will just be like singing and dancing. I'm like, oh my gosh, you're not even on beat. My kids are great dancers. He is not. However, I made a profession out of it.
• 7:14
  So I co-owned that studio. Then I got into bodybuilding as well. So I did professional fitness competitions as a bikini competitor for seven years as well. I started competing after my first pregnancy. I competed seven months after that, which is...
• 7:29
  When I look back now, I'm like, okay, that was a lot, a lot happening in that seven year period of time. We severed ties with my parents. We don't have a relationship with them anymore. I was going through postpartum depression really bad with my first son. I have two boys, six and 10.
• 7:47
  And that was a really challenging part of life, but competing in that aspect really pulled me out of that. And I just loved it. I love the sport. I love being on stage. I had another baby in between competed 11 months after my second one, ended up winning a world title, which was really cool. And then I started to get into more personal development. And that's really what got me in my journey that I'm in. Now I started mindset coaching. I was also in network marketing.
• 8:14
  And the thread that kind of went through all of that when I was training clients and leading a team, I built a pretty large team of women in a beauty-based network marketing company, is that they weren't hitting their goals or their ranks or their income, not based off of the external things, but more of the internal things that they weren't necessarily looking at. And I'm like, there's a huge part that people are missing. It's not just losing the 10 pounds or wanting a fitness program. There's some deeper stuff going on in there.
• 8:42
  that a lot of people aren't willing to look at. And then that's when I'm like, okay, I want to try this beta program. And then I launched a group coaching program called Level Up VIP back in 2020. And since then, through that mindset coaching journey, I've
• 8:56
  I then went on to become a trauma-informed master coach. I do a lot of internal healing work, energy work, work with a lot of facilitators. I lead breath work as well. And now I host women's retreats. So that's long story short. Well, that took eight minutes, but that wasn't bad. It's just remarkable to see your growth. I haven't seen you in a hot minute because we've been a little busy. And I usually try to make it over there for something. And I haven't in a minute. But every time I see you, you're growing.
• 9:26
  So take it from me, who's doing the same thing. And I'm a biggest fan of you and your husband and your entire family. So...
• 9:34
  What was your first foray into personal development? You kind of skipped that part. Yes, I did skip over a chunk of that. We joined a couple masterminds, and that was really kind of – I actually – before the mastermind, I hired a coach. But I'm like, I want to launch this business, but I don't know what I'm doing. I was structured in network marketing, personal training, kind of on my own. I also have a history or a –
• 9:56
  of graphic design as well. I did that for over 10 years. So that's a huge part of what I do. But, um, I decided to hire a coach and I'm like, I don't know what I'm doing. I want to launch this business. So let me find somebody who's done it in a way that I'd like to do it. So I worked with her for a couple months and then I launched my program. And then, um, Jeremy and I ended up joining an elite mastermind. And that's really that kind of opened our eyes to like, oh,
• 10:20
  whoa, there's a lot of people out here who are entrepreneurs doing really big things. We didn't even know barely what a podcast was at the time. He shows up to this event. He joined it before me and he was like, all these people have podcasts. I thought only celebrities could have podcasts. And he's like...
• 10:36
  I want to be on a podcast. I'm like, okay. So he did like this podcast tour. He had no, not, you know, usually when you go on a tour, you have a book or you have something you're launching and selling. And he was just so genuine of like, I just want to go share my story with people. So he did like 20 podcasts and got all, you know, got on all these shows and it was really cool to watch. And that's what inspired our podcast. So joining the mastermind was really our first like heavy experience in investing, uh,
• 11:03
  Time, energy, money, you know, a good chunk of money to be able to be around people of this level doing really incredible things. Oh, yeah. If I told you how much I've spent already. Listen. It is. I get it. Yeah. It's really cool because you guys were just fearlessly going into the next foray. And that's you hired a coach. You did everything the way you're supposed to do. The way that we just sit here in the Heart of Life podcast, constantly tell people to just do.
• 11:31
  Progress over perfection, going from one challenge to the next, to the next, to the next with reckless abandon, not caring and believing in invisible progress. Yeah. So I want to point this out again. You grew up one city over, so it was just a little bit better than Warren, just a little bit. But you had adversity going through high school. Then you meet this boy who's having somewhat of a trouble. How did you know that?
• 11:57
  He was worth it. He loves when I tell this story. He was Jeremy Campbell. Jeremiah Campbell is podcast number two of the heart of life thing. He came to my office, set up everything, and we shot a podcast that was deep. But you could hear us just having fun. And I just met him on social media, and we just connected, and we have lifelong friends now, and anything I can do to give back. So, again, how did you know –
• 12:26
  This is what everybody wants to know. It's like, you just fearlessly went into it. How did you know or did you not know when you just said, hey, I'll figure it out as I go along because I trust me? Yes. Yes. And I didn't really know what self-trust meant at that point, but I knew I had an intuition inside. And it's funny. He makes me tell him this story all the time because I just told him this for the first time like a year ago. And he actually told my parents when I think I was about 15, he goes, one day I'm going to marry your daughter.
• 12:56
  And my parents were just like, okay, guy, cool. Like, cool. Like he was always so personable life at the party. Everyone just loved him. Right. He knew how to like turn the charm on and that's just who he is. He doesn't have to turn it on. That's just who he is. But at some point I just knew even in and out of rehabs, he would, he'd disappear for a while. Even before we started dating, he'd go off, do whatever he did. He came back. And I just knew once we started dating, I'm like, this is going to be it. Like,
• 13:22
  this is just it. I didn't question it once. It was just, this is going to be my person. And from then, like we went through our own hardships, like my mom slashed my tire when I was on my way to go see him at one point in high school. And I'm like, you know, it doesn't matter. Like this is going to be the person. And that's just who it's been the last 18 years. Now we fast forward and it's
• 13:45
  you know, the big house, the big business, the one-on-one coach, we see this success, but it wasn't always like that. Didn't he relapse two times? He relapsed a couple of times, one time when we were together and I didn't know it at the time. I was 18, very young, didn't have any idea. Cause when you're so close to something, you don't necessarily see it. When you're in that close proximity, you're like, I don't notice anything off. So there was a whole thing that happened with that. He went and got
• 14:13
  drug tested. And then it, you know, it came out that he was using and then I ended up driving him to rehab, bought him a pack of cigarettes. He came out and there, there we went. Every time I hear that story, my heart sinks because I wish,
• 14:26
  My father passed away from alcohol and drugs. And it just – I wish somebody would have been in my corner. I wish somebody would have been in his corner. He had a lot of people. He just didn't want it. Didn't want to hear it. So I would – I'm sure that Jeremiah tells you this, but you were probably the why.
• 14:43
  for him. And I never had that. So I don't know, just, I love it. And I, and as this is massively successful woman here and go back and listen to some of the destined to be podcast, you can hear, she's like the first couple, she's wanting to throw things at Jeremiah. And then now she has her permission to activate. Yeah.
• 15:03
  And she just is an ace. And it's getting better and better and better. And then we're going to talk about this, but she's got a retreat coming up November 12th through the 16th. Permission to activate women's retreat in Nashville. I watch all of them. And I'm trying to get my girl to go. I think it would be a blast. Tell us what happens at these retreats. Okay. And what's good. Let's talk about this one specifically. Wait. Yes. And how can the women...
• 15:28
  I don't know, the 10 women or so. No, I'm just kidding. How can people get hold of it? Or, I mean, especially with what my husband does as well, a lot of the wives of who's in his community, they'll enter into something like this as well. And gentlemen, first of all, if you're not watching this on YouTube, go on YouTube and watch how beautiful she is. But I will tell you, the reason why I love interviewing women is it's what women want. We can hear. So most of the guys that listen, they're all wanting women. Well, you're about to hear it. Study the master right here.
• 15:57
  because I did. I watched the dynamics of your family, whether you knew it or not. I'm not trying to be creepy. I come over for dinner and I'd watch everything. And I'm like, I want that. And I would tell your husband how lucky he is. And it's not even lucky. He cultivated, he did the work and it wasn't easy. So gentlemen, listen to what she has to say. And this is how you cultivate an absolute badass partner. Yeah, it's really cool because especially when I work with a lot of the wives in my husband's community or people he's worked with,
• 16:27
  It's really awesome because there's just another level and element of being able to do this type of work together but also separately because when you're able to, even if you are in a committed relationship or you have a girlfriend, when you're able to come back and be able to see each other in a new light from all the work that you've been putting into yourself, both of your lives will change. It's like the ripple effect that you see. It's like if you put in the work for you, everyone in your life is affected by it and they can feel it because with these retreats,
• 16:55
  It's so funny because that's one of the biggest things that I get from women. They're like, my husband isn't, they don't understand. They don't think this is a real thing. What do you mean you like go on this trip with all these women and do like personal growth work and have fun? Like I've literally had that conversation and people are like, this isn't real. I'm like, oh, it's real. We've done it. And I have like, I can tell you all about it. So that's one of the biggest sticking points is getting their husbands or partners to really understand what it is because it's not a tangible thing.
• 17:23
  When you go to the store to buy an iPhone, you leave with an iPhone. You go on the retreat, you're not coming home with a product. You are the product. So it's all about really embodying the tools that you get to learn. And this is the fifth one that I've done. We've been to Austin, Scottsdale, Northern Michigan, and Gulf Shores. And then this next one's in Nashville. And they're like my third child. I have two kids. These are like my third babies.
• 17:46
  You are fully taken care of as a woman. It's really challenging sometimes to be able to receive support because we hold it for everyone else. We want to hold everything on our shoulders. We have knots on our shoulders. Speak for myself. But we hold everything, give everything to everyone else but us. And it's so refreshing to be able to walk into a big, beautiful home, set your stuff in your room. And we have a retreat team there that takes complete care, fully care of you.
• 18:09
  We have a chef in the house. All of the worksheets or worksheets, all of the workshops are completely tailored to you. And you're able to just fully exist and be and show up without having to do anything in exchange. And that's, it triggers some things in people because there's usually an expectation or a self-judgment we have, but to be able just to show up as you and your full form to be supported and led, it's unlike anything I've ever seen before. It's like doing six months of work in a five day period of time.
• 18:38
  Let me correct or add to that. It's you don't have to do anything but be mindful and do the work. And you don't have to do anything physical. Correct. You're not just showing up for five days to lay around. But I will tell you that doing some of those work when I was in the heart of my shit doing the work, nobody would want to be there. They want my life now.
• 18:59
  but they don't want to go do the shit, the balled up in a ball crying, not knowing where all these emotions are coming from. Walking in the situation, even today, where I can remember walking into your house four years ago thinking,
• 19:16
  I want this and I'm, I'm cultivating it now. And it's, it's activating me right now, but I'm like, Ooh, you don't let it be, let it feel. And it's, I'm so excited. And I, we haven't even gotten in any of the questions of 20 minutes in. So talk a little bit more about what's the big, uh, I know you do a lot of breath work at these retreats. What's this, who's, who's the main person that's coming? Usually invite somebody cool.
• 19:40
  Yeah. Yes. I have a really good friend of mine. Her name is Jessica Zweig. She's speaking at the event. Yeah. I'm co-hosting an event with her actually in Michigan here in a week on the 20th. She's coming here. Yeah. Let's see if we can get her in the pocket. She can squeeze it in. I know Jessica. We spoke on Craig Siegel's podcast and she's from Chicago, right? Yeah. She'll be. She's in Nashville now and she's actually coming in to stay with us in a week. So she'll be here. Yeah. We'll set that up. She's fantastic. So that's a good one. What do you got? What do you, what it's the, is there a, um,
• 20:09
  theory theme so it's funny when i get when i talk about the theme this one came like healing and honky tonk because it's in nashville and it sounds really cheesy when i say it but it's kind of encompasses everything that we do because you do we do the breath work we do an in-home sound healing with the sound bowls and the crystal bowls all of the somatic stuff there's one-to-one coaching time with me as well as finding a sisterhood of women especially as i was just talking about this on my story right before i got here
• 20:36
  As adult women, a lot of us have some sisterhood wounding from past childhood experiences, high school, mean girls, just never feeling like they fit in. Am I enough? Am I good enough? And all of that can start to come up, especially when you think about going into a home with six or seven women who you may not know. It can bring up some things.
• 20:55
  But I promise after the first night, the first and everyone gets there and they're like, okay, what is this? Like, what do I do with my hands? Like, I don't know. And like, we eat dinner, we have this whole experience. And then after the first breath work, the next morning, it's like the walls come down and everyone's able just to be their fullest versions of themselves. And that is one of the most incredible things to see that level of transformation and embodiment.
• 21:19
  Because you get all of the elements, you get the somatic practices and the body practices of the breathwork, breathwork and manifestation and all of these cool workshops that we do. But there's also a lot of elements of fun that we're going to go listen to live music. We're making custom trucker hats. We do dance parties. We have a pizza party. Every, every retreat that we do, it became a tradition now.
• 21:40
  where everyone puts their pajamas on and we stay in the house and we just do all of these fun things. And it's just, it's all of the elements that you would want that people don't really realize exist in the world. I, I hash Nashville's great. I love not even like country music and still love. Yeah. And that's the thing. You don't have to be like a country girl to, to show up. Like it's, it's just the city. I don't, I don't drink as I know you don't either. I walked on Broadway recently and,
• 22:06
  And I was walking from bar to bar to bar and just walking in and out and just to feel the vibe. You feel the music. You feel the energy. And we're going to do some Nashville cool custom experiences, too. But it's not like, you know, we're going to party on Broadway all night. You know, that's not the vibe. But you're going to feel like you're in Nashville. You'll definitely get the energy. This just came to me so.
• 22:25
  One of the things that probably scare women from doing the work or going into personal development is that, well, my husband's not going to do it with me. And I've heard you talk about this a lot. What do you say to people that they're afraid that it's going to change the relationship? Because obviously you and your husband did this at the same time. Yeah. And you guys have gone your own different paths, but still end up together because you always choose each other. And it's beautiful, by the way. And, um,
• 22:54
  What if somebody isn't, what if their husband isn't into the woo-woo stuff? What do you say to that person? That happens a lot. That's a big fear from a lot of women. They're just like, I don't understand. They don't get it. They're afraid for a couple reasons. A lot of times...
• 23:09
  Might go a couple layers deeper. It's triggering their little boy inside of either, you know, these are some big words, but feeling like they're being left by their wife to go do this thing without them. They're feeling that they're not being included in this part of their growth. Are they going to get, and my husband, Jeremy and I went through this as well. Oh, really? Are, is she going to get so big and do these big, huge things without me? And then she's not going to need me anymore. So it can trigger some deeper level things. Do you say that you need him or do you say that you want him or you choose him?
• 23:37
  Oh, I choose him. You have to choose him. We choose each other every day. Oh, yeah. See, that's a big thing that the whole needing, if you need something. Yeah. Yeah.
• 23:46
  That's creating, you said this a thousand times, scarcity or lack or fear. And that's a negative energy that's not good for you. So again, people, what do you mean you don't need me? If somebody, that's a red flag alert or a pink flag alert. If somebody needs you, we need to do some work and look into that and feel where is that coming from? Because I've come from that neediness energy.
• 24:10
  Growing up the way that I grew up, which is much like Jeremiah grew up, you've seen it all. We were wrong, man. Our parents were wrong to us. Mine was really wrong. So I needed love and I cling to it in all the wrong places, which brings me to, wait, let's finish that thought though. Go deeper into that. What do you recommend for people that want to do the work? Start with you. Like, oh my God, my husband's not going to like this or is giving me grief.
• 24:39
  Yeah. And that can happen. And honestly, the thing that I tell most women is just to have an open conversation with your husband or partner, whoever this might be in your life, of how important it is to you. Because when you can speak from your heart and really use that communication skill of not coming at it like, well, I need to do this and you don't support me and all these things. And it can be pretty intense if you can come from a place of like, this is truly important to me.
• 25:03
  I see myself being here. I want to enter into this level of growth and support. This is not saying that you're not providing everything I need. This is just something I want to do to complement my life, that I can truly feel the growth and expansion. It's going to make me a better person. You're going to be able to see it and feel it because you're a walking testament of it, right? Like Jeremy says all the time, attraction over promotion.
• 25:24
  for constantly nagging, I want to go, but you don't let me. It's like, that's a lot. If you can then show up the way that you know, you want to show up and really be the product of this environment of like, I'm going to come home and you're going to see the transformation, but it's not going to be, I'm not going to pull away from you. This is going to make us stronger. And this is going to make us a better couple and relationship because I'm going to be growing as well.
• 25:45
  Well, and if everything isn't so great in your life, you're not living, you're, you know, you said permission to activate. You're, you're, you're living small and you're living a lie. Yeah. And incongruent, it's, it is probably not going to work anyways. So if in fact it does end said relationship because you did the work, it wasn't meant to be.
• 26:04
  Right. And that can happen as well. You know, everyone is meant to go on their own journey and their own path. And sometimes those things just get highlighted because you know you're meant to go in this direction. And that's okay if the other person maybe isn't quite ready for you. And my advice is let it go.
• 26:18
  Yeah. Let it go, people. I know it's scary and you've been together for 15 years, but it's, trust me, let it go. Yeah. I work with a lot of women in those types of situations and we work through it and process through it. Yeah. How important was it to start your journey in fitness? Because obviously that's how I started to, I almost feel like physical fitness is the foundation. And then once you get that, you did the hard thing to build your body and you're
• 26:47
  guys follow her on social media and you'll see expect now she's maturing into a beautiful beautiful woman but when she did her training it was it was she was top-notch ridiculous ripped um but now you just you look like a perfect normal person no perfect you're perfect i i i i've always thought you're beautiful but i know you inside and out and you're inside and your kindness and your motherhood and the fact that you're
• 27:14
  a loyal partner in the love that you give to everybody shows true. So it makes you even 10 times more beautiful. Sorry, gushing on you. So how much, how important was fitness as the foundation? Because for me, fitness, not only is the foundation, it is the epicenter of,
• 27:30
  Of everything. If I don't have my physical fitness, I can't do my mindfulness fitness. I can't be my best self at every day. I work out seven days a week. If I miss a day, I'm not. Yeah, I'm a miserable guy. Yeah. Back when I got into bodybuilding, like I said, it really helped me come out of my depression that I was going through after having a baby. I really didn't understand what my body was going through.
• 27:51
  And so I entered into this crazy lifestyle, not really knowing or understanding. Like I stepped on stage seven months postpartum. I think I like lost a total of 60, 65 pounds from, you know, going in to deliver my baby to then stepping on stage, which was a little crazy. If I go back now and I'm like, whoa, that was wild. However, it's something I needed to do in order to process my emotions. Hold on a second.
• 28:16
  Taking Jeremy to rehab wasn't wild. Watching your mom slash your tires. That wasn't. Everything. I think the moment that wild shows up in your life, you're about to ascend to the next level. So next time wild happens, be like, yes, let's go. Oh, yeah. I love that part of my life. I love competing. I love walking on stage, the sparkly suits and like all of it. Posing. It was. I loved it. Your eyes just lit up. Yeah. I love that part of my life. Will I do it again? Probably not. I'll never say never, but I really it just doesn't.
• 28:46
  you know, really go with my lifestyle anymore and what I want to prioritize. But that part of it really allowed me to enter into that form of dedication to something. And it really let me move some energy through. And I didn't even know what I was doing at the time, but I was just processing energy and releasing and moving my body, which is so important. Now I still lift weights. I go to the gym. I do all of the things just not as intense, but breath sound and movement is how you move energy through the body. So if you can,
• 29:14
  create some sort of a movement practice with whatever that feels like for you, like you can really move some stuff. So it's still very important for me to be able, even if it's just walking on a treadmill, that's honestly where I get my best content ideas and all of my downloads is coming from moving because I'm just moving energy. It's, you know, I resonate with you guys so much. We keep things so simple. It, stuff, work, feelings, whatever. It's good stuff. It's great. But here's a word that is a little bit bigger. What does it mean to be the quantum queen?
• 29:45
  So this is, it's funny because Jessica, I worked with her for a couple months. I did one of her retreats and I worked with her as a coach and she really helped me build this next version of my brand because I was doing mindset coaching, which I love. That's what I started with in 2020. And then I got to a point kind of like that glass ceiling of like, okay,
• 30:05
  I'm doing all the mindset tools. Like, that's great. But there's a lot happening in here that I have not even tapped into. Like, I didn't even know what it felt to feel. I don't know how to feel for a really long time. I would just numb some things and shut it down and avoid. And I'm like, okay, now I'm getting to a place where I can do all the mindset tools and hacks out there. I can read the books, listen to the podcast. But there's a lot going on in here that I'm not really addressing.
• 30:27
  And that's when I really started to tap into the somatic practices when I got my master coaching certification as a trauma informed master coach. Jeremy actually has that certification, too. We went through that program and that unlocked so much into this quantum level of looking at the 3D versus 5D and looking at different levels of our thinking and consciousness and how our energy flows through our body. I was like.
• 30:49
  whoa, I was missing a lot of this beforehand. And now I just bring them together. So I'm able to still work with all of the mindset tools and the journaling and all of those beautiful things, but also work internally now with my different forms of healing modalities and different tools where I'm like, there's a whole universe out here that where I wasn't even tapped into. And now I'm like,
• 31:09
  Whoa, this is quite fascinating. Okay, now I'm interested. I do this stuff and I don't even think about it. Now you have me wondering. So explain how somatic and energetic modalities work. Yeah, so energy. Everyone is, we're living, moving, breathing energy, right? Yeah.
• 31:25
  So we have our bodies hold everything. If you're ever at the book, the body keeps a score, which I'm pretty sure you have. Right. So, you know, that our body just keeps energy and it sticks in our bodies and that can create some blockages when we're looking to expand or up level or make a choice or have a conversation. And you might just feel like.
• 31:43
  like if you feel anxiety in your chest, that's where I get it a lot is here. And I'm like, oh, there's just some, there's something stuck there. My body's holding on to something. And it usually is tied to a layer deeper, whether it's a story or a belief or something that your body is holding on to that it thinks it's true. And when we can go in and work in the body, semantically is basically just working in the body. We can start to speak to these parts of ourselves, do a lot of inner child healing, a little inner child work, and,
• 32:10
  that now you're like, oh, I got this pit in my stomach. I don't know what it is. It's been there for 30 some years of my life. I just thought that's how it was going to be forever. Now, when you start to drop into your body with breath, sound and movement, this is why I love facilitating breath work. We do it at the retreats and my workshops is when you can quiet your mind and body. You have to lay there for like 90 minutes. It's great. People love it because you have to lay down, right? Everyone loves to lay down. You now get to create the space and the quiet and the stillness to be able to listen to what your body's trying to tell you. Because often,
• 32:39
  that's a part in our journey that we don't listen to what our bodies have to say. And we're just like, Oh no, that's just how it's always been. I'm going to shove it off. I don't, whatever. It's annoying. I don't have time for it when we can create the time and the stillness. And you're like, Oh, here's this thing. Can I close my eyes and focus in and listen to what that part has to say and actually listen and not tell ourselves it's stupid or you're judging yourself. Cause when we go down the shame, um,
• 33:04
  And guilt spiral, it can just, it's not really a great place to work from. And those parts of ourselves, they don't need to be shamed or guilted because they're part of you. So if we can extend love and compassion and speak to those parts, because a lot of it is our younger selves coming up.
• 33:20
  It's my seven-year-old that's getting triggered or activated who never was heard or seen or understood or she felt left out. Now we can speak to these parts of ourselves that just energy is stuck in the body. And when we can communicate and listen, we can move some major stuff and you will feel some space internally.
• 33:36
  All right, people, this isn't just for women. This is for everybody. I'll be completely blunt that I feel this stuff too. And when you just said that, it made me think of it. It's a surprise to you that I'm a lot like Jeremy. I never stop moving. Oh, yeah. Like I fall on my face at 9.15 only because I was going since 4 a.m. And it isn't because I take a – and I'm not running from anything. I just – I want to give back. I want to do. We escaped South Warren. So it's like –
• 34:03
  I want to help everybody I can and feel like I feel every morning. Yeah. And it comes with all of the things that we've done. So what, uh, it's really funny that you said that because Jeremy is the same way. And this is for men. Listen, especially, I know you have a male dominated audience, which is great, but give me time. I'm working on it.
• 34:22
  And he is the same. He's like, well, I just got to move my energy. And we came home from something one day and he was like all, you know, flustered about something moving around the house. And I'm like, what are you doing? And he's like, I got to just move. I'm moving this energy. I'm moving this energy. I'm like, are you moving the energy or are you just moving around with the energy? You're not actually processing it and letting it come out of your body. You're just festering it and moving it around the house. You're not actually letting it move through you and release it. He
• 34:51
  making it like, oh, do you, sometimes you just release it. You don't know what it is. Correct. What is the biggest, and you don't have to say who it is. What is the most impactful two-part question? What is the most impactful one that you remember somebody released? And then what is the most common one that women, because I want to speak to you women that they release, I would have to, I would guess it has to do with shame or blame.
• 35:13
  Yeah, there was a lot of that. I've had a couple at retreats that are pretty powerful. One of the retreats I was at, I've had a couple girls when I lead the breathwork. It's a 60 to 90 minute practice and we got the music going. The lights are on and I'm speaking over the music. You're talking to my heart. I love it. It sounds so exciting. The healing music, you can feel the energy and the beat moving. And a lot of the songs that I use have, some of them don't have words, some of them do.
• 35:39
  And when we create the space and stillness, you can listen to what they're saying. And it's really speaking to different parts of yourself. And then I will lead them through a practice of where to guide the energy in your body and really how to focus in and speak to that part. And I've had a couple women really start to feel some things internally where there was some anger that needed to be released. They just, they're like, I got it.
• 36:00
  I'm just feeling this anger. It's got to come out. And we've actually done, you know, I'll kind of pull them to the side after. And we've done a couple anger releases where I'll just kind of guide them through where the energy is at in their body. You can hold a pillow and scream it out and speak to those parts, like words that you may have never been able to say, or didn't feel safe enough to say at the time, or didn't have the tools, didn't even know you needed to say it. All of those things start to come up and I'll just kind of ask some deeper questions and they're able to communicate it and just
• 36:24
  release it out. So anger can come out screaming. Anger is technically a secondary emotion. There's usually something living under anger, whether it's fear or sadness or shame or guilt, whatever it might be. It can come out in tears. It can come out in laughter. I've had people laugh sometimes and they're just laying there smiling because they're just being able. Sometimes you
• 36:47
  sneezing, yawning, they'll move their hands and move their feet and energy just starts to move. And then we'll get up and dance and release some of that. But I've seen some pretty cool things be moved. And I've also seen it for Jeremy too, when we've done practices together, I'll move some energy for him too.
• 37:02
  I want to do it. That what you're doing is giving people the permission to activate. So how did you go from destined to be to the permission to activate? What inspired that? I didn't even hear all the next thing I know is boom, no more destined to be. Yes. Well, logistically speaking, our schedules just got really crazy. And for us to sit down and record an hour long podcast or however long it was in his busy schedule, my schedule with the kids, it was just becoming really challenging for us to.
• 37:27
  We would either come out of our work days being completely elsewhere. Like he's got his work stuff going on. I'm dealing with the kids. And then we'd sit down and we're like, what do you want to talk about? We're like, I don't know. Like this is, this is not being productive here. Like we're just kind of, you know, we need to take a little pause. So we paused on that podcast. And then when I started to expand my brand, I worked with Jessica and we came up with this whole new version of this brand. It used to be more level up in mindset. And then we got into permission to activate and we just.
• 37:55
  launch this new iteration of where my brand and coaching practice is going. I haven't got to any of the good stuff you do. It was such a good conversation because
• 38:05
  Guys, this lifestyle, and I steal this from your back in the days of the Destin to Be podcast, is the woo-woo. The woo-woo stuff works, man. My life, since I quit the naughty water and I started going on this, it just keeps another level. Another thing happens. And it's just all positive. The lowest part of my life is still better than the best part of my life back in the partying and drinking days. It was like, oh, you partied too hard. No, I actually got it. I still worked.
• 38:35
  life was good. So talk about your one-on-one coaching and how do people, how can people work with you? Yeah. So I have a couple of different ways to work with me now. I just wrapped up my six-week group coaching program. I brought back Level Up in a different form. So it used to be a 12-week group coaching program with anywhere from 10 to 20 women. And then I streamlined it into a six-week program that just had the juiciest content from those 12 weeks. Juiciest.
• 39:01
  which was really fun. It's all digital. We meet once a week on Zoom. That just wrapped, and I'll probably bring that back again in the early 2025. But right now, my one-to-one coaching practice is technically not available just because I'm heading into the retreat. And with the Nashville retreat, the women who are coming, they actually get two months of one-to-one coaching with me.
• 39:26
  So we do 30 days leading into the retreat and 30 days post retreat that you're with me. We have one to one calls and then we use like a talk to text app that in the moment, it's kind of like in your back pocket coaching, which I love. That's where I can really go deep with a lot of my clients is, you know, it's like when you go to there and I'm not a therapist, but like if I go to therapy, you see them every two weeks and you just kind of bring up what's coming up.
• 39:50
  With this coaching structure, you're working through something in real time. You can literally just grab your phone and voice note me and you're like, this is what I'm working through right now. Like, let's unpack this. And then we go back in real time and we're able just to unpack whatever's coming up for you in the moment. What does the one-on-one coaching cost? Just so everybody that's in their job.
• 40:10
  It ranges. It ranges. It's, you know, anywhere from 2,000 to 3,000 usually for depending on how many months you're working with me. I did a summer special that was like $9.99 for a month of coaching with me, which was great. And I'll probably bring that back sometime next year. But right now, the main focus outside of my other events, like I have the event coming up next week, and then I do my monthly breathwork workshops as well. And those are like 50 bucks. You can come to that. So keep in mind, guys, we need...
• 40:41
  If you're working with a coach, make sure that they're working with a coach and make sure that this isn't their only means of finance. This woman, her husband is very successful. She is very big part of making that business successful. She takes care of two beautiful wild boys. They have an inside in ground swimming pool. That can be all your life. So these kids just go and have they live the life that we that Jeremy and I. They're living their best lives, man.
• 41:10
  Oh, I said to my daughter this morning, I was like, she's like, I just received this text. I'm not even kidding you. I said, are you going to go to camp next summer? Cause I got to put a deposit. And she's like, well, I kind of want to go on a tour of Europe with my friends. She's incredible. 16 years old. And I, I said, that's a big ass. Yeah. And I started thinking, wow. Wow.
• 41:29
  This is what, this is, I came from eight mile in Warren to possibly sending my daughter to Europe for the summer. That's incredible. What choices did I make that were right? Yeah, that's just a testament to you and how you guys live and what you're creating. That's amazing. So I'm big on limiting beliefs. Like if anybody should have limiting beliefs, it would be me and Jeremiah. And yet I don't, I just don't have them. And the second that I hear them, it drives me insane.
• 41:59
  What do you work with women who come to you with these limited beliefs? I'm not pretty enough, or I'm not this enough, or my husband doesn't love me, or I'm not lovable,
• 42:10
  It drives me crazy when I see women making themselves smaller to fit in. What do you, what is your go-to when somebody comes to you and says that? Yeah, it's, it's layered. It really is because they go so deep, right? Like even if you're looking at just posting on social media and you're like, well, I don't want to share this. I'm just, I can't click post on this thing. And it's like, usually it's not the logistics of, you know, what time should I post on all of these things? Like it goes deeper. Is somebody going to see me who, for who I really am? Am I going to be judged? Yeah.
• 42:40
  Is somebody going to think this way? If I share this thing, am I sharing too much of myself? Like it, there's so many layers that go into that, but a lot of women, you know, myself included is that I'm not enough wound or I have a, I want to be, be feel like I belong to something and I've never had that. So they go layers deep and a lot of people don't.
• 42:59
  sometimes don't know what they are either. They just feel stuck in some area of their life that they can't quite pinpoint what that is yet because a lot of us weren't taught how to feel. And when we can enter into, oh my gosh, I'm actually feeling this way, identifying the feeling,
• 43:14
  you can open up a lot, but those beliefs, a lot of us do have the conscious ones, right? Like, am I too much? A lot of women have that one. Am I too much? Is somebody going to not accept me because I put all of myself out there? Am I too loud? And that stems back to childhood. That goes back to the early, early years. I'm too much of limiting belief because I know I'm too
• 43:34
  I don't, I don't look at it that way anymore. I'm like, I'm just expressing more of who I am. And if that's not for everybody, that's okay too. I think I'm, I'm, I'm just passionate and I, I've been through the depths of hell and walk through and I don't want anybody to ever feel that. So I can give you something, whether it be physical, emotional, hold space, time, or advice. So you don't have to go through what I went through. I'm going to give it to you. So, um, it, what,
• 44:01
  I wrote down filters here. When I see an ordained amount of filters on someone's social media, immediately I want to call them up and hug them. Do you see the same thing where – and what's going on with beautiful women too, by the way? Yeah. I see beautiful women putting filters on.
• 44:23
  that don't need them. Yeah. What's going on there? You know, that's not something I see often in my community as much, but I do know it happens. Like I'm not on Snapchat or anything, so I don't see any of those Snapchat things happening. I was a big thing over on Snapchat. But you know that they can use the Snapchat filters, which are ridiculous, by the way. And then upload it to Instagram or Facebook or whatever. Hey, you know we're going to see you in person. Yes. Yes.
• 44:45
  And it's like, if that's the number one thing that I tell all my guys, all my coaches, it's like, if you can't look in the mirror and love yourself and love what you see, and little unknown, that's how I started all this is I'd look in the mirror and I'd see the blotchy skin from all the alcohol. And I'm like, I don't like that guy.
• 45:03
  I ran from it. So that told me I had to change. So again, go into filters. And then the ones when they make themselves skinnier, man, what do you say about you being in fitness? Yeah. When people are struggling with the hardest one, which is weight.
• 45:18
  I know it's hard, right? Because we're all looking for that level of self-acceptance and love. And a lot of us just, we don't know what that feels like. And we're a work in progress always, right? I don't like to use even that term, but we're always on our own growth, healing journey and doing all of these beautiful things. But a lot of it does come down to that self-worth or not accepting yourself or not even knowing how to love yourself yet because we've just been instilled in
• 45:43
  from parent society, whoever you grew up with, whoever's around you, a lot of that is just adapted onto your own belief system. And we don't even realize it's not even ours. It's not even ours to hold. Somebody placed that upon you and you're like, well, now this is part of me and I got to figure out how to unravel all of this stuff. So it goes layers, it goes layers deeper. And it is really like, I would love to see more people out there just embracing what
• 46:07
  who they are truly. And that just, it's a process of really understanding that it's safe to love yourself because safety is an element that so many of us don't even know what that feels like to be safe in our own bodies and not have to be in, you know, this mode all the time and wanting to protect ourselves. And I've, I've had to do a lot of work around that too. So I've, I've done an incredible amount of work on that. And I still, when I get stuck or I get off the
• 46:33
  out of alignment, I do a breath work and a meditation that just, I repeat to myself. I love myself. Thank you. I love you myself. I just remind myself that I do love myself because I was making choices that didn't love myself with the booze. And so having said that, I'm working on, I'm going to laugh at this one, being, just being and not doing. Yeah. It is the hardest thing. Tell Jeremiah so he can laugh at me. Oh yeah. We talk about it all the time.
• 47:02
  What are you working on in your life? Be vulnerable because that's how we get people to attract to us is, hey, oh my God, this woman is feeling the same thing I'm feeling. Oh, that is one of my favorite conversations. And that's why I love bringing groups of women together because the vulnerability that is available for that level of connection, you don't get on. I mean, you can get it partly on social media, right? Like you can talk to people and you can see people through the screen.
• 47:32
  a little bit. You don't have to fully tear them down and like be, you know, all out there for everyone to see, but that level of vulnerability. And that's what I love to do with my clients. And, you know, as a coach, it's really cool because we can go deep on a lot of things. And some of my own, everyone has their own opinion on this and, you know, I'll just speak for myself.
• 47:51
  Some people, you know, they're like, well, don't share your own personal opinions with your clients and what you've gone through. And I've had a lot of women who find so much like gratitude. If I'm willing to open up and share about some things that are going on in my life or things that have gone on in my relationship, different things that I've had to work through that they're just like, okay.
• 48:09
  I can just like that. Thank you for saying that because I thought I was alone. And that's how so many women feel is that they're on this journey alone of like, I thought I was the only one that felt this way. And I'm like, Oh no, girlfriend. Like it's not just you. And when you can break that wall a little bit and share about yourself and they can see themselves in you and your story, even if it's different story, different situation, they're like, Oh,
• 48:35
  I thought I was by myself. Like that is so comforting to know that other people have gone through similar things and that you've either worked through it or came out on the other side, or you learn from this experience. And it's just like, you can see the weight almost lifted off of people when I can vulnerably share and also witness it for myself when I'm sitting in a room of, you know, eight to 10 women on a retreat. And they're like, they're sharing with each other and having these conversations. And I just get to witness it and just hold the space and the energy of safety and, you
• 49:04
  it's like we're in this little vortex bubble, you know, and they're able to freely speak and not feel like you're going to be judged or going back to the being and the doing. So many of us feel like in order to receive love or support, I have to do something in order to receive it. And that's, that's a big one of mine. Cause I didn't feel like I was deserving of love or support without giving something in return. And I'm like,
• 49:28
  Oh, wait a minute. I can just be and exist in more of who I am without giving you anything. And you're still going to love me the same way. Like, what is that? Hold on. Let's, let's stop there and unpack that more. So if someone, cause that is a kind of one I did say, yeah, I had to do for you. I had to earn your love because it wasn't unconditional in my life. Actually. Yes. Love didn't exist when I grew up.
• 49:50
  So what do you recommend somebody do? You can't just sit there and just, oh, okay, now I'm going to receive swivel shows. So what can someone do besides work with you to start,
• 50:03
  receiving and allowing and just being. Yeah, it's a practice and it can come back to something like, especially for women, I'll speak for women, right? It can come back to little tiny micro moments. If you're walking into a store and somebody holds the door for you, right? Instead of running and saying, I got it, I got it. Like, thank you. And just continue on with your way. Like that's a form of receiving.
• 50:27
  Well, a newsflash too is from a man's perspective. If you tell us, because we are cavemen, you have to say, hey, I need to work on receiving. Would you please do this for me? And I get a newsflash. If the guy doesn't do it, then that's fine.
• 50:43
  You can probably get rid of him. Yeah, open communication, man. If my mom would say to me, hey, Kelly, I'm working on receiving more. Would you bring me flowers? Or ask because we don't know. And we're not trying to not do it for her. We just don't know. Yes. We're cavemen. We're meant to provide. I'm here to put a roof over your head, keep you safe. We've got a newsflash. Keep her safe is holding space, listening, and reciprocating and growing her. Yeah.
• 51:12
  active listening, not and this is something that Jeremy and I've gone through too, right? Because he was a fixer. And I heard you say that I think on one of your your episodes to who'd want to come and fix everything. And I'm like,
• 51:21
  don't need you to fix anything right now. Can you just listen? And that took us a long time to get to that place of just holding space for somebody of like, I just want to share this with you. I don't need, and we'll, we'll say this all the time. It's like, do you want me to listen? And do you want me to give you advice? And you can start a conversation with anybody. If someone comes to you and they're like, Hey, can I tell, can I share something with you? And if you're in a committed relationship, you can straight up ask them, do you want advice? You just want me to listen. Mm-hmm.
• 51:48
  And be okay with whatever that answer is, because sometimes is, and I'm not a man, but I have a husband and that will trigger some things internally. Like, well, she doesn't need me. She doesn't need me. What am I going to do? Am I even worthy of it? Like,
• 51:59
  Especially coming from the abandonment that he grew up to. You have an abandonment. And then I would add one to it. And I just realized this as I was listening to you. When you're a business owner and all you do is solve problems all day long. You've got to flip that switch, man. It's hard. Tell him he's lucky. Tell your husband he's lucky he doesn't have a daughter. I have a 15-year-old daughter. And I remember I just got to sit there and listen. I don't know if it's you that is on my shoulder. Someone's always on my shoulder. Just listen.
• 52:25
  She just wants you to listen. Yes. So I get a lot of practice from her. And it is so hard because I solve problems all day long. It requires a different skill set. And a facilitator that we work with, he will use this quote. He's just like, and we say it all the time now. And he's just like, well, presence is healing.
• 52:43
  And you can use that, especially if you have kids of just being present, just your energy being present and not distracted doing anything else. Right. We all have phones like I'm guilty of it, too. It's like just being present with somebody, even if it's a short amount of time, that's going to go so much farther than somebody trying to come in and fix something for you. Yeah. Oh, man. I know I would have killed to have.
• 53:05
  It's just someone holds space for me as a child. Yeah. We got to get, we're starting to wrap up, but I have so much more. It's just, I could talk to you for hours. Who are some of the thought leaders that you are following besides Jessica right now? So who are some of the people that, that are, or mentors or people that you would recommend?
• 53:25
  Yeah, I love a Joe Dispenza. I know you're a huge Joe Dispenza fan. He's got some just amazing content. If you are willing to look into that realm of things, it's just, it's incredible. It's incredible. Right now, I do listen to a couple podcasts. I read a couple books and we're really big in just to music as well. So we'll do a lot, you know, some of Joe's stuff. I bring his practices even into my own coaching practices, my own personal practices, because it's...
• 53:52
  If you can just drop in and listen, even to some of his 20 minute YouTube videos, like it'll change the trajectory of your day. Not to sound dramatic, but truly it can. It can start to shift some things internally. Thoughts create things. Absolutely. Yes. Yes.
• 54:07
  And I also listen to a couple, you know, women podcasts out there, growth, entrepreneurship, things like that. I've been really listening to lately and just music has been a big healer for us in the last couple of years that we just put on some really good music. I realized that I never take downtime. I almost very rarely listen to music, even when I'm working out now, I've got a podcast because I'm trying to grow this and I'm taking in content. Do you listen? Did you follow Brene Brown at all?
• 54:32
  I have, yes. Yes, I know. I'm familiar with her work. She's like the grand... Yes, she's like one of the OGs. Grandmother. She's not even that old. I apologize for that. All of the shame and all of the things. I've read every one of her books. It's phenomenal. She's fabulous. I did this thing, weird thing, and I think I've said this all the time, but when I was manifesting...
• 54:51
  my girlfriend, I did all the work to figure out what women wanted and what they, what I needed to become, how I needed to hold space. Here's see the text messages I get from her. Like I've never felt so seen. I've never felt so heard. And it, and it just, it empowers her to become the best she can be because I'm not stopping. Yeah. I'm growing like Tim and watching us both. The Senate's it's, it's a pure, it's pure magic and it's bliss and it's harder than life. Truly. Who, uh,
• 55:20
  What I want to talk a little bit about being a mom, because I think you're one of the best moms in the world. I watch you with those boys who are are fun. Wait, are you guys done having kids? Yeah, we're done. We're done. No girls then, huh? No, I have. I'll tell you about she can come over. She can come babysit if she wants to. She can come hang out with some of the kids. Yeah. So how is being a mother influenced your approach to coaching?
• 55:45
  Oh, man, there's so many elements and layers. Like when you become a mom, like I, it was a lot for me. I had postpartum, like I said, after my first one, it, my entire existence was like flipped upside down. I didn't know how to handle it. I didn't know what to do.
• 56:01
  And at that time, there wasn't as many online communities as 2014 wasn't even that long ago. But there wasn't all the groups in the Facebook groups and all the Instagram things and all of the podcasts and all of these things that were available. I was just Googling like, what's wrong with me? There really is no excuse to not do it. I mean, you can get on YouTube. You can literally find it tomorrow.
• 56:21
  anything now is available like for free like you can youtube literally anything find a podcast on as long as it's you know a reputable source but i had none of that or i didn't know where to look at the time because this was 10 years ago so i was just googling on like the interweb of like what's wrong with me why am i feeling this way and jeremy was like i think you should maybe go like talk to somebody because i think this is not really normal and i'm like okay
• 56:43
  Did they prescribe any meds? No, I didn't get on any medication. I did go to therapy for quite a while after that just to kind of talk through what I was going through. And that was also at the time that, you know, with my parents, we were separating ways from them. So it was just trauma is too much, too fast, too soon. So it all just kind of hit at one point. And I just...
• 57:04
  I've said it all the time. You don't deal with your shit. It's going to deal with you. Yeah. So you were just kicking the can down the street. We didn't even get into your family because you don't talk to them anymore. So there's obviously some layers. Yeah. There's a lot of layers. But it all worked out. Yeah. Yeah. And I mean, now the cool thing, especially with having kids, is I love to work with other moms who have kids because there's so many elements and layers and parts. You get to reparent yourself as you're parenting your children. And that is...
• 57:32
  That's a lot, again, to unpack there. And that's one of the coolest things, because when you're getting activated and triggered with your kids, it's usually part of yourself that you really it's like a mirror holding up to yourself. You're like, if I'm getting losing my shit on people over here, it's like, oh, there's some stuff. Now, your kids can be asked like my kids may ask. Oh, I do. Like they're wild. Like my kids are wild. Right. They're boys. They're crazy. Yeah.
• 57:54
  But that also is a reflection of like, oh, there's a part in there that I'm not really looking at that I want to be more regulated around that I want to show up a little bit differently, be more present with my kids. And because I have experience with my own kids, I love to work with other moms. I don't exclusively work with moms, but I'm able to be on that same level of like, girl, I get it. I get it. Like we have four soccer teams between our two kids travel soccer this season. It's like our schedule is crazy, you know, so I understand that.
• 58:22
  lives and schedules, they're all over the place. Things shift like that. But when you do carve out the space for yourself, you can just see how everything transforms around you and how it affects your kids, how it affects your partner and the people in your life. And that's one of the coolest things is just to be able to relate with other women because I get it. Like people say we all have this, we all have 24 hours in the day. Yes. But we don't have the same 24 hours, right? Like the 24 hours are different. Everyone's day looks different. So I'm
• 58:50
  Your time might be spent. Like my hours are very restricted because I drive my kids to school. I pick them up. We then go to soccer. It's like I have to carve out time that makes sense in my lifestyle and structure that I can then do what I need. What's one thing your clients might not know about you? Oh, geez. I feel like I am...
• 59:08
  pretty open on a lot of things. There's a lot of things I keep sacred to myself. Like I will talk about all the stuff with my parents, a lot of stuff with Jeremy, a lot of stuff with my kids. I don't show my kids publicly on social media. So that might be, you know, a part that some people don't get to see. I have a small close friend circle on Instagram that gets to see my kids. But otherwise, I'm not sure if there's like something that sticks out. I'm trying to think I'll really have to sit on that one and kind of think about that.
• 59:35
  So if you could leave us with one piece of advice, what would it be? Well, the first thing that just popped into my head is to do your work. That's part of it. And not to be afraid to really lean in because if you really say you want change and expansion in your life, you have to be ready for it. Like it's going to come. You put that out there into the universe and you're like, I'm ready for something to shift. Be prepared for something to shift and have somebody that can support you.
• 1:00:02
  hold you accountable, not in like a, you know, hardcore, I'm going to keep you accountable to all the things, but like have people in your circle that you can go to and that you're able to share openly and vulnerably. Cause that can really change your life is having a support circle around you. Because when I see women and I have this all the time, people who come into my world and into my retreats, it's like, they're outgrowing their friend circles and they don't feel that they can share anything anymore. And people are like, Oh, that's great for you. But like, that'll never
• 1:00:31
  I'm putting all this energy and time and putting this out there just to like get this in return. And it's very defeating for a lot of people. So if you're seeing that evolution and expansion, you're like, this just doesn't fit and feel in alignment anymore. It's okay that you're going to grow and expand. And to be able to find safety within yourself, that's like the most important thing to get into the practice of asking yourself what you need. That's one of the most powerful questions. I will add one thing to that because people think, oh, I'm going to make this change.
• 1:01:01
  I've seen this happen a lot. It happened to me. And I don't know if somebody, things get worse before they get better because you are shifting energy in your life. And that is God's source, whatever you call it, saying, do you really want this? Because most, a lot of people won't even make that first leap. And when they do, it's, it's, they're met with a big amount of resistance. And what, what, what is this? And that is the first major test.
• 1:01:28
  You can get through that. And the other side of it is what you were seeking. Yes. But that could last a minute. Yeah. It can feel like you're going in reverse. When you start to enter into different levels of your work, it's like you get resistance after resistance. And it sounds like things are working backwards. And you're like, I thought I was like going to enter into this thing. And it's like, I've been hit with it. It's just, you're just moving energy, man. You're just moving energy through the world. That's the number one thing that happened to me when I quit drinking. Yeah. You'll feel it. It was like, wait a minute. Mm-hmm.
• 1:01:52
  No, this doesn't feel any better. I feel terrible. I got all these feelings. I'm crying. I, it was months of that too. And I could have so easily, I say it to now. It's like, I could have a drink and, and, and it wouldn't be that big of a deal. But then I say to people, if, if I could, I can drink and I can not drink.
• 1:02:13
  And I choose not drinking. I choose it. So I choose what feels the best and what is the best and what can make the mass impact. So I like people that have done contrast. So that's why your story is so remarkable and everybody should follow you. Thank you. Mallory Campbell should also listen to your Permission to Activate Podcast. I got some people I'm going to introduce you to. Yes, I can't wait. Rachel, Permission to Offend Podcast. Oh, I love that. Which is beautiful. Oh, yeah. There's definitely an alignment there. Tell me about...
• 1:02:42
  you 35 36 I know 36 what's 40 gonna look like for you we were just talking about this with friends that came over and I I don't even know if I want to I had this like big vision that came to my head that's why I know I know you do the vision boards and you always yeah we do that's why I'm asking big vision casting and kind of you know seeing what that would feel like and I do this really cool practice with a lot of my girls and we do this masterminding practice at the retreats and we do these really cool like and this is something that's out there it's like wooden
• 1:03:09
  Wouldn't it be cool if dot, dot, dot, and then you just let yourself go there. And so I've had a couple of things come up around that, that I don't know if I want to share yet, because I'm kind of like just in the very early stages of it. I'll tell you later. And, but I think just doing what I'm doing on an even more bigger, impactful scale.
• 1:03:28
  and even more traveling. We want to take our kids to Europe and we want to do a couple of things like that. But just getting this message and growing this community, just continuing on that trajectory, being able to speak at different events and just growing this solid community that we have some really awesome women in the community. Anything I could do to help you know I'm a huge fan. I'm going to make some good introductions. I will tell you, I do that same thing, but I say, will it be awesome when? Not if, when? Yeah.
• 1:03:55
  I know it's just a mind thing because everything I've ever set my mind to, I just do. And the last time I was with Jeremy was he said, you just do it. And I'm like, you know, I just don't even think. Yes. Just start moving. Take massive action. Just go forward. And that's what you've done. And look at it. The last question I'll ask you is you've done massive, tremendous amounts of work on yourself and it hasn't always been easy. Has it been worth it?
• 1:04:20
  100% I would do it. I wouldn't change anything that I've been through because it got me to where I am today. And that's not to, you know, spiritually bypass anything and say it made me stronger. It did. But also I wouldn't be sitting here and having the life that I have if all of the things in life didn't transpire exactly the way that they did. And that's how you know where you're where you're supposed to be because that's where you are. So I wouldn't change anything else. Mallory, you're a beautiful woman.
• 1:04:46
  inside and out. You're doing great. I love you. I love your family. I wish you nothing but continued happiness and lots and lots of health to keep doing what you're doing. And thanks for coming here. Thanks for making the track over here. It wasn't, I know it's not easy but quick, but this is all cool to see how you, what you've inspired. Thank you. Thank you for having me. My pleasure.
• 1:05:11
  Please rate and share this podcast. I'm active on all social platforms and love to hear from my Segal supporters. Each and every episode is sponsored by my company, National Technology Management, the easiest and best IT company to do business with, delivering peace of mind with technology every day, even simplifying cybersecurity. Visit TrustNTM.com for more info. Until next week, be harder than life.