Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #84 There's Nothing Funny About A Hot Sigh!

Transcript

#84 There's Nothing Funny About A Hot Sigh! · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: You gotta be careful this table.
• 0:01
  Speaker 2: It is a wobbly table, one of the wobbliest. I
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: didn't want to say anything, but the conditions we're recording
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: in right now are less than ideal. Also because someone
• 0:15
  Speaker 2: has got the grumby pants on.
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: Today, I've got very good reasons for that.
• 0:20
  Speaker 2: Just give me a giggle. Welcome back to two doting dads.
• 0:41
  Speaker 2: I'm Maddie Jay and I'm as And this is a
• 0:43
  Speaker 2: podcast all about parenting.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: It is the good, it is the bad and the relatable.
• 0:47
  Speaker 2: And if you've come wanting any advice, stop right now.
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Thank you very much.
• 0:53
  Speaker 1: I need some given that table and ruche there, mate?
• 0:55
  Speaker 2: Am I sorry?
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: Hands off, you're a right stoop. Let's just sit.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: Should we start again?
• 1:06
  Speaker 1: No?
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: Should we start again? Should we clean the slate? No,
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: because right now the slate is messy. I like it's sticky.
• 1:14
  Speaker 1: It's sticky. I am grumpy. Yes, let's just address the
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: elephant then we can move forward. Yeah.
• 1:19
  Speaker 2: Please do you like that? Are you grumpy? Because I
• 1:22
  Speaker 2: made you make me two pieces of toast?
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: That's my biggest grace.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: I started eating into your nutlegs.
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: The hospitality sized nutlegs.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: Is that it is that what you're not about.
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: No, no, no, As you know, I've been moving and before.
• 1:36
  Speaker 2: Sorry I didn't. I didn't know if you.
• 1:38
  Speaker 1: Were completely different. Wait what we've moved? Before I get
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: into why I'm cranky. The only thing that went my
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: way yesterday was a four pack of Stonewood pacific Ale.
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: After a full day of moving seven o'clock, I think
• 2:00
  Speaker 1: we kicked off, finished off at four o'clock, put the
• 2:02
  Speaker 1: footy on it, and I was like, we had to
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: open the fridge and it was beaming back at me.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: There was sunshine.
• 2:10
  Speaker 2: Did you know what was er? Or was it a
• 2:11
  Speaker 2: surprise four pack in the new house? It was Frank,
• 2:14
  Speaker 2: you new landlord, like, where the fuck my stone would gone?
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: And You're like, shut Frank doesn't drink perfect But no
• 2:22
  Speaker 1: it was. I think it was just in with all
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: the food that came over. It's been placed in the fridge,
• 2:27
  Speaker 1: accidentally cooled down and there it is the pacific Ale.
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: One of the best. We had a few on the
• 2:33
  Speaker 2: weekend as well. We did right to that.
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: That's the first sit down lunch that April and I
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: have ever been to.
• 2:39
  Speaker 2: You're welcome, remember, I said to you.
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: I was like, what do we what do you do there?
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: I've never eaten sitting down before, like you know what
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: I mean, like a you know, a nice table chef.
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: It was beautiful. Food was top shelf.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: Very good, and made even better accompanied by a delicious
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: drop of Stone and Wood Pacific. Well, yes, cheers, my guy.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: I'll cheer you up once again.
• 3:04
  Speaker 1: Hopefully, and thank you to Stone and Wood for making
• 3:07
  Speaker 1: these episodes possible.
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: The only way is up from here.
• 3:11
  Speaker 1: On woods and upwards. But yes, a little bit cranky.
• 3:14
  Speaker 1: I'm just cranky because I've just had enough of it.
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: I've just had enough of this landlord. Instead of going
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: through the usual channels, what you would do is where
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: you've got you just deal with the real estate agent.
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: And you know they do it all the time. He's
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: seeing the move through his eyes as the owner, so
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: he would go through and be like, well, these guys
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: have to clean the place. That's fine. I have no
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: drums with that. I've got a cleaner in there now.
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: But he's going through and going.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: What is your can I ask the cleaner? Because for
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: those of you who are unaware, we are recording in
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: Frank's house today, popularly is April's beloved dad and your
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: cleaners are in there at the moment. You're in there
• 3:55
  Speaker 2: right now, right now, And so what he's because he
• 3:57
  Speaker 2: before we started recording your phone was like ding ding
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: ding dinging. So he's in there with the cleaner.
• 4:03
  Speaker 1: He's gone in to interrogate the cleaner on what they're doing.
• 4:07
  Speaker 1: This is what I'm dealing with.
• 4:07
  Speaker 2: Let the cleaners what I'm.
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: Working with, right But he's also going through and seeing
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: things through his eyes as the owner and not the
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: third party, which should be the estate agent, and go
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: through and tick off what's been clean whatsoever. So he's
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: trying to get us too clean as much as possible
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: for him so he can put it on the market
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: spick and span. You even though when I moved in
• 4:28
  Speaker 1: there it was subparer, but we didn't complain.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: That's and that's the worst part. Whenever you move into
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: somewhere new, you never like you're just in the rush
• 4:35
  Speaker 2: of like you know, getting boxes in there and you're unpacking.
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: You just want to get it set up. You never
• 4:39
  Speaker 2: actually go through, like start to finish and take notable
• 4:43
  Speaker 2: the things that are already broken. So right now, like
• 4:46
  Speaker 2: stainings that you're like, well that was there when we
• 4:48
  Speaker 2: moved in. It's like, we'll prove it we're fucking dying because.
• 4:50
  Speaker 1: We have a photo through the condition report. But the
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: thing is he had three real estate agents over two
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: years looking after the place, so he kept changing because
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: they're probably sick of dealing with it through the agent,
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: because he's why they have the audacity to ring us
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: LUF and go, hey, do you guys have a condition
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: report because we don't have one. Come on, get fucked. Also,
• 5:10
  Speaker 1: he's got the shits because we vacated today and before
• 5:14
  Speaker 1: he could get a chance to do any bond claims,
• 5:17
  Speaker 1: we asked for the bond claim back through the agency
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: so that he has to chase us for anything. Because
• 5:23
  Speaker 1: it was kind of like you know what, bro he
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: was always going to be nitpicky at everything, Like he's like,
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: you got to clean the debris from the back courtyard, brovious,
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: Now wind it is outside and the debris is what leaves.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: Are you stupid?
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: It's a hurricane right now.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and he's like you need to come and clean
• 5:37
  Speaker 1: the debris. Get fucked over it anyway. I don't want
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: to talk about this while I'm.
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: No therapist, but it sounds like you're annoyed.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: I am annoyed. Also, what he's paying for is just
• 5:50
  Speaker 1: moving in general. Let's put him aside. Let's not make
• 5:52
  Speaker 1: this episode about him.
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: I told you, bro, you should have got removalists. No, no,
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: you should have hide the help it was.
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: I had to mate help me. Essay had a truck.
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: It was pretty easy because it all went into story.
• 6:02
  Speaker 2: I'm annoyed you did nasty by the way.
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: I needed someone stronger. Ah, fuck you do you have
• 6:09
  Speaker 1: a truck?
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: I can get one.
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: How maids you want the biggest truck?
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: I look at I've got Look at those calluses. That's
• 6:17
  Speaker 2: from jerking off edging. I can lift tables.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Nice, you've been working out with those hands I have.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: I knew this was coming, and I was like, I'm
• 6:27
  Speaker 2: going to get myself like removalless fit for the occasion.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: And then I was waiting for the phone call. I
• 6:32
  Speaker 2: was sitting there next to my mobile phone. Anything any
• 6:34
  Speaker 2: second now, the bone will go off and it'll be
• 6:36
  Speaker 2: ash asking for help. And it never came.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: The good thing is we were moving into somewhere else
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: at the end of next month, so it can help me.
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: Then got another month of.
• 6:44
  Speaker 2: Training, very busy, very busy. I feel like it's an
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: elite level of friendship. Once you're being asked to move house.
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: I don't like to ask because then they have to
• 6:55
  Speaker 1: help them when they need to be I was like,
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: oh fuck.
• 6:58
  Speaker 2: That's when you cut them off.
• 7:00
  Speaker 1: Just we're moving house. Also have deleted his number.
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: Well because the house you saw, because everyone must be
• 7:07
  Speaker 2: waiting with baited breath, real worried. Ash. I've had many
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: people message me saying is Ash okay, will the family
• 7:12
  Speaker 2: be homeless? And I'm happy to say no, the house
• 7:17
  Speaker 2: that you saw last week.
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: Oh yes, we have decided to move into that house. Yeah,
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: which is a friend about So shout out to Jim
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: and Amy they're probably not listening, but shout out to
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: you guys coming in at the last moment rescuing the Wixes.
• 7:32
  Speaker 2: It always works out, it does too good people.
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: That's true to good people, true. But I just want this, honestly,
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: I just want this landlord to get off my back,
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: just go away. I even said on the last message,
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: can you please communicate through the real estate agent moving
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: forward because I'm done with you?
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: And he was like, okay, and you stop messaging A
• 7:52
  Speaker 2: I'll stop messaging.
• 7:52
  Speaker 1: You said bye.
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: So this is it okay, Okay, see you later.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I spent the whole day. Yes, are they moving?
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: And you just you accumulate so much shit with kids.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: I'm not a holder. Far from it. Although even old clothes,
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: clothes from when the kids are one and two, obviously
• 8:10
  Speaker 2: they're three and five now, I've been told and I
• 8:13
  Speaker 2: don't want to throw I don't want to throw it out.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: I want to throw away the memories. I find that hard.
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: Maybe it's just me.
• 8:19
  Speaker 1: In some instances you're like yeah, but then like you've
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: got to just be ruthless, and.
• 8:24
  Speaker 2: You threw away Macy, she's moved out.
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: People going like, oh, moving is a night man, they've
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: got no kids. I'm like, don't you fucking dare talk
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: to me about how it's a nightmare for you have
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: a couple of kids and then move a house because
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: you're like, I filled up a whole storage which can
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: fit a whole car and more. And then higher up
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: apparent allegedly, so.
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: What's clogging up your storage?
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: First of all the main pieces of furniture that we
• 8:51
  Speaker 1: need for the new place that we can't store here,
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: that's hot, and then like that's got one side, it's
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: boxes and box.
• 8:58
  Speaker 2: A lot of toy throw them out.
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: April threw so much stuff out, burn them because the best.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: Thing is, my friend, kids are very dumb. They forget. No,
• 9:10
  Speaker 2: he's not.
• 9:11
  Speaker 1: I'm going to challenge you on this because you're coming
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: across stuff right and you've got no emotional attachment to it,
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: and you don't know that your kid has an emotional
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: attachment to it. But then you're like throw it out,
• 9:22
  Speaker 1: like yesterday, I don't know if you remember the remote
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: control skateboard Ninja turtle.
• 9:28
  Speaker 2: How can I forget that's.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: In storage right, which we don't think he's just that
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: attached to it. And then yesterday he's got plenty of
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: toys to get and then essay, out of nowhere he's
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: pulled the actual remote control bit out and goes, where
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: is it? Oh my god, it's in storage. I don't
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: want it to be in storage, like he thinks it's
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: gone forever. So then you've got to go try and
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: explain to hus like, look, in a couple of weeks,
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: we can move to.
• 9:51
  Speaker 2: Get it out from storage.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: No no, no, no, not opening that can of worms.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: As soon as you open that can of worms, it'll
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: be like, just go and get it. Yeah, okay, no, no,
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: so you've got to be firm, you gotta be fair.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: So yeah, yesterday was like, there's still so much in
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: the house to get out anyway. So then that pile
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: of the landlord makes Ash cranky.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: I feel like the first ten percent of like packing
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: up is good.
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: You're like, this is great in progress, good.
• 10:19
  Speaker 2: Progress, good headway. I'll be done in a day or two.
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: Fuck it just it gets slower and slower and it's
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: never ending.
• 10:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 10:27
  Speaker 2: When I spoke to you, excuse me, oh my goodness.
• 10:30
  Speaker 2: But when I spoke to you.
• 10:32
  Speaker 1: Yester afternoon, I was a defeated man. I was like,
• 10:34
  Speaker 1: I'm defeated today you are. I am absolutely defeated. So
• 10:38
  Speaker 1: let's talk about other things.
• 10:40
  Speaker 2: Okay, I'll talk about a story that I want to
• 10:43
  Speaker 2: tell you about.
• 10:43
  Speaker 1: Please distrack me with something good. It's better be good. Look,
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: no pressure.
• 10:49
  Speaker 2: This is a story that is going to sound almost arrogant.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: This is very much a story which is tuning my
• 10:56
  Speaker 2: own horn, and Ash. You know me very well. I
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: don't like to toot my own horn too much.
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: I'm setting this up.
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: I want other people toot my horn. I want to
• 11:04
  Speaker 2: be laying there as my horn is being tutored. If
• 11:07
  Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: Away, let me edg you.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: Okay. So I went down to the local cafe with
• 11:16
  Speaker 2: Buster the three legged dogs, who I have to say
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: is an absolute local favorite people.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: He's a BONDI icon.
• 11:24
  Speaker 2: They love them, they love them. It's always awkward as
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: well when someone is patting your dog, having a moment
• 11:28
  Speaker 2: with your dog, and you just got to stand there.
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: And they give you no give he's a good boy.
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: You're like, I'm a.
• 11:34
  Speaker 2: Good boy, and so you know, in that moment, I
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: find it. It's easy, it's less awkward if you make
• 11:40
  Speaker 2: a bit of conversation. So a few times to a
• 11:43
  Speaker 2: few different people. You know, I've gotten to know them,
• 11:46
  Speaker 2: okay because of the dog. Because of the dog.
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: They really they're your dog's friends and you're like friend
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: by association.
• 11:53
  Speaker 2: As I was waiting for my coffee the other day, Sue,
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: lovely suit. Sue happens to be about eighty. She's come
• 12:00
  Speaker 2: up to me and eight year old eighty year olds
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: who was lovely.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: She sounds like a really nice she's the nice type
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: of old.
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: She hasn't gotten Yeah, she hasn't gotten ashold. She doesn't
• 12:11
  Speaker 2: dementia hasn't taken the joy out of her yet yet.
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: Great, and so she's.
• 12:17
  Speaker 2: Having a nice moment with Buster. I did remember, Sue,
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: and I said, where's your dog suit? Okay, okay, I
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: shouldn't have asked that question.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Oh she's gone.
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: She was padding Buster and she was mid pat and
• 12:29
  Speaker 2: she stopped. She froze, and I thought, oh god, I've
• 12:34
  Speaker 2: hit a nerve here. She took a big breath and
• 12:37
  Speaker 2: she said, my dog is no longer with us.
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: Oh dramatic.
• 12:41
  Speaker 2: And I said, what happens, Sue? Unfortunately her dog can't
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: remember the name Jack Russell.
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: Though, really good friends you are Jack Russell.
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: He was fifteen he passed away.
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: Okay, well that's a good innings.
• 12:53
  Speaker 2: And Sue said that she was distraught fifteen years. It
• 12:58
  Speaker 2: lives by herself. Her son's move away son is living
• 13:01
  Speaker 2: in Coffs Harbor. I can't remember his name. But if
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: you're around, call your mom. Give her some help. She's
• 13:08
  Speaker 2: struggling right now. And I said, sir, will you get
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: another dog? And she said, I plan on getting another dog.
• 13:13
  Speaker 2: I want to get a rescue dog. There's four dogs
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: that I'm looking at right now, Greyhounds, Ash rescue greyhounds
• 13:19
  Speaker 2: that she's trying to decide between.
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: Get off four stopping to puss, get all.
• 13:25
  Speaker 2: Four start racing them. And I was like, what's the
• 13:30
  Speaker 2: hold up? When are you going to pick them? And
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: she said, I need to go out to the rescue shelter.
• 13:34
  Speaker 2: It's out in Penrith, past Penrith, so from Bondy it's
• 13:38
  Speaker 2: over an hour away.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Have you committed to take you sou out there?
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Look as in the moment, in the moment, it's like
• 13:47
  Speaker 2: just before when I offered to help you move I
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: don't actually want to help you move house. I'm just
• 13:50
  Speaker 2: being polite and I appreciate. I got caught up in
• 13:53
  Speaker 2: the moment. She goes, I can't drive, so I can't
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: get out there. But you going there?
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: You're out?
• 13:59
  Speaker 2: Hello? You theres trying his best not to what eyes
• 14:13
  Speaker 2: just fucking popping out of its socket. So she said
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: maybe it'll be a week, two weeks. I'm trying to
• 14:21
  Speaker 2: get someone to drive me out there. And I said, Sue, look,
• 14:27
  Speaker 2: I said take my number. And I said, if you
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: need someone to drive you out there, I would love
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: to help out.
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: You are a great guy. And I was gonna says
• 14:41
  Speaker 1: Sue to Yorn.
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: So she hasn't messaged me. I said, I'll be annoyed
• 14:47
  Speaker 2: if you don't message me. Sick and just I'm just
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: a good guy.
• 14:52
  Speaker 1: He gave it the wrong number.
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: She did, you know she's been old, hard of hearing.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: I did say it's tricky because there's a two three
• 15:01
  Speaker 2: two three, the double two three, and it does stunt people.
• 15:04
  Speaker 2: She did seem a bit confused on the double two three.
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: I don't know if she's taking it down correctly, but
• 15:10
  Speaker 2: I've not seen her since. She hasn't messaged, but I'm like, again, yeah,
• 15:16
  Speaker 2: follow through, I would, Can I come? I would if
• 15:19
  Speaker 2: you want to? Yeah, I mean, I mean film, we
• 15:22
  Speaker 2: could film it. Soo's like, why are you filming me?
• 15:24
  Speaker 2: Shush suit?
• 15:25
  Speaker 1: Shoot shoe, Sue, that's lovely, thank you and an Osker,
• 15:31
  Speaker 1: I know it was just you were just being polite
• 15:33
  Speaker 1: and you will never let her. Should we disappointed?
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: I don't know. She called me an angel, which you
• 15:40
  Speaker 2: do these things, ash not for the reward.
• 15:43
  Speaker 1: You're probably skipping back up the street going I am
• 15:45
  Speaker 1: an angel, I am an angel. I get dog did
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: a ship and he didn't pick it up.
• 15:50
  Speaker 2: We just we just watched a movie called One Time.
• 15:53
  Speaker 2: I think it's a story about this guy who saves
• 15:59
  Speaker 2: like six hundred Jewish children of World War two, right.
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: And it sounds like too much of an effort.
• 16:07
  Speaker 2: And it was an amazing story. So I've just watched
• 16:09
  Speaker 2: that the night before and so that's still running through
• 16:12
  Speaker 2: my brain.
• 16:12
  Speaker 1: What you did is the equivalent, that's the modern day equivalent.
• 16:17
  Speaker 2: Literally, I was like, I didn't I need to leave
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: a legacy behind.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: I've committed to helping lady, your old lady go out
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: to Penrith, but I haven't actually said organized a time.
• 16:26
  Speaker 2: So when a you're thinking next Thursday, oh can't do Thursdays.
• 16:29
  Speaker 2: Thursday's about Monday. I flat out on Monday.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Wash my hair.
• 16:33
  Speaker 2: Yeah, sorry, that's my hair washing day.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: I can't go.
• 16:37
  Speaker 2: We'll do it. See anyone out there, if you see
• 16:40
  Speaker 2: someone elderly, talk to them, help them out.
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: Your gaslightinger a little bit bit, a little bit speaking
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: of gaslighting. Oscar has learnt gaslight me and he's doing
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: a very good job. So before we move into this house,
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: the other house was two stories. The bedroom was upstairs.
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: Must be nice.
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: You can talk you like a twelve story matter. One
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: of the villains. One of the villains that we have.
• 17:07
  Speaker 1: There's two stories floor is the fourth floor is the
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: fourth floor, so I just take the lift, the glass
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: lift glass bottom. Yes, so Oscar has learned to gas
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: like me very subtly, but he thinks it's obviously genius.
• 17:19
  Speaker 1: So what he's done is I always would say to
• 17:22
  Speaker 1: get dressed, buddy. You know what it's like every morning,
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: especially the kid like Marley can get a self dressed.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: Kind of what kind of yeah, let's not go into it.
• 17:33
  Speaker 1: Oscar he's been able to dress himself for a long time. Yeah,
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: he's shown up, but it would take forever for me
• 17:41
  Speaker 1: to get him to do it. You know, get dressed,
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: Come on, get dressed. It's always a nightmare. First thing
• 17:45
  Speaker 1: in the morning. He's rolling around and comfy pajamas, eating
• 17:47
  Speaker 1: a fucking slice of toe ye with a finger in
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: his nose. And you're like, mate, that's good, get dressed.
• 17:52
  Speaker 2: Don't disrupt this.
• 17:53
  Speaker 1: But how I figured out that it's too good to
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: be true is instead of just being like, yeah, I'll
• 17:58
  Speaker 1: do it, just saying yeah, he said to me very politely, yes, daddy,
• 18:02
  Speaker 1: I will get dressed for you. Now. First of all,
• 18:04
  Speaker 1: I thought, oh, that's lovely great, and I thought, can't
• 18:07
  Speaker 1: bullshit a bullshit it, bro, can't do it?
• 18:09
  Speaker 2: Well, what happened?
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: So I left it. He's upstairs, he quiet, I'm thinking
• 18:13
  Speaker 1: he's getting dressed. Well, he thinks that I think that
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: he's getting dressed, and I was like, I'll leave it,
• 18:18
  Speaker 1: just give him ample time to actually follow through, follow through.
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: And I got distracted as well, and it'd been like
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: twenty twenty five minutes, and I thought, I'll go and
• 18:27
  Speaker 1: check where he's at. Hasn't moved a fucking muscle, a
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: little bustard, so he's gott an extra twenty five minutes
• 18:34
  Speaker 1: of playing with his toys before I've gone. And I
• 18:37
  Speaker 1: snuck up on him too. I was like, you're going
• 18:40
  Speaker 1: to learn today's son, and he was like, head into
• 18:43
  Speaker 1: whatever he was doing, and I was like, what do
• 18:45
  Speaker 1: you do? Get dressed? I am, I am getting dressed,
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: but he's He thought that he'd got away with it.
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: So I'm monitoring the situation to see if he does it.
• 19:00
  Speaker 2: I don't know if Oscod does this. Marley's also turned
• 19:02
  Speaker 2: into ale bit of a gas lighter. I feel like
• 19:04
  Speaker 2: it's the age gas lighting starts at five ish.
• 19:09
  Speaker 1: It's a critical stage of the child's.
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: Literally, this is how weak her gas lighting is. So
• 19:14
  Speaker 2: I'll say to Marley, just.
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: A bad gas lighting game, very bad.
• 19:17
  Speaker 2: She needs to get better.
• 19:18
  Speaker 1: It needs to up a game outsmore.
• 19:20
  Speaker 2: Marley loves to be in control of the remote. She
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: loves it. She loves to hold the remote anyway, saying,
• 19:25
  Speaker 2: turn the TV off, ignores me, Turn the TV off,
• 19:28
  Speaker 2: ignores me, turn the TV off. Got very angry and
• 19:33
  Speaker 2: she goes, WHOA, Well, I thought you said keep the
• 19:36
  Speaker 2: TV on. And I'm like what and she goes, yeah,
• 19:42
  Speaker 2: that's what I thought you were saying.
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: You said you want it off.
• 19:48
  Speaker 2: Just got to ask for it.
• 19:48
  Speaker 1: Bro. It's like when you like accidentally say like a
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: confusing sentence and someone pulls you up on it, where
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: you're like, please don't stop, Like don't stop, all right,
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: all right? Gotcha? Speaking of that age, both of our
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: kids are getting to that age five, they're going to
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: start to lose their baby teeth. With Oscar just going
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: to the dentists and getting a metal tooth. The dentist's
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: gas Does he have a cap or? Is it? It's
• 20:16
  Speaker 1: a crown, It's a Transformer crown. What do you mean
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: by That's what he told him. It was because they're
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: just which one is the mouth salesman. It's like a
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: molar or not like a gun like there, it looks
• 20:28
  Speaker 1: pretty gangster, to be fair.
• 20:29
  Speaker 2: Yeah it sounds.
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's all it falls out, So that too is
• 20:33
  Speaker 1: going to fall out, right.
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah you want to it does fall out. Back to
• 20:39
  Speaker 2: the dentist.
• 20:41
  Speaker 1: Cashing it in, you know, it's like we collect scrap metal.
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: I used to work with this guy and his kid
• 20:47
  Speaker 1: lost her too, and apparently she was upset for days.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: Because she lost the two.
• 20:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, they just can't comprehend it. So there's all these different.
• 20:56
  Speaker 2: Must be so strange.
• 20:57
  Speaker 1: But also before teeth fall out, they it loose, right
• 21:01
  Speaker 1: can you remember as a kid, like you're like, oh,
• 21:03
  Speaker 1: I got to lose tooth for the first time, and
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: then all of a sudden that comes out. You're like, oh,
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: either they come out that way or your parents in
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: that generation will be like, let me tie this to
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: a door handle and rip it out for you, you
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: know what I mean?
• 21:13
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I still like watch videos on social media with
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: people tying tooth to an earth gun bullet and then
• 21:18
  Speaker 2: firing it out.
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. I found one that I want to show you.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Oh yes that I thought you. Maddie Jill love this
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: because it might give us an idea. Just watch that.
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: The gas.
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: The mom's laughing, Oh my god, there screams of fear.
• 21:52
  Speaker 2: I'm like, that's child abuse.
• 21:53
  Speaker 1: So what Matt's watching is a dad obviously, and the
• 21:57
  Speaker 1: mum's filming. The mum's laugh is so funny, and the
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: kid is screaming because his tooth is tied to a
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: golf ball and dad's about to drive it into the bushes.
• 22:12
  Speaker 1: When I saw that, I was shocked.
• 22:15
  Speaker 2: But also that level of fear sounded very real. The
• 22:19
  Speaker 2: moment the tooth was ripped out, he realized it was like, hey,
• 22:22
  Speaker 2: I'm back. Yeah.
• 22:23
  Speaker 1: He was like the dad did a really really good
• 22:25
  Speaker 1: job at diffusing the mood, so he was like hit
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: the golf ball, looked at him and went great shot
• 22:32
  Speaker 1: for the high five. It also just sounds funny.
• 22:40
  Speaker 2: There's a moment though, her dad looks at the kid
• 22:42
  Speaker 2: and he's like shit, and he's like.
• 22:44
  Speaker 3: Hey, yeah, that's great.
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: Here's a couple of kids at day k who've lost teeth,
• 22:51
  Speaker 2: all boys, and I'm like, oh wow, like Timmy's lost
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: the tooth. They've all like running into walls and fallen
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: off trees. Yeah, how old are they when they started
• 23:00
  Speaker 2: grade one or two?
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: Ranges? It varies. I had baby teeth for a long time,
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: like my dad was like, you like little piranha teeth
• 23:08
  Speaker 1: for like.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: Hang on for quite a while? Well, what's quite a while?
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: Give me some time for.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: It into primary school like instantly?
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: Yeah, like apparently, okay, not to up your story. My
• 23:21
  Speaker 2: little brother, Tommy, Tommy, Tommy was only born with three
• 23:25
  Speaker 2: adult teeth. So the adult teeth because they weren't there.
• 23:29
  Speaker 2: You know, you're born with all your teeth in your jaw. Okay, again,
• 23:32
  Speaker 2: let's just put it out there. And then this is
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: not a scientific podcast, so anything that we say here
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: is purely a joke and satire. Only.
• 23:39
  Speaker 1: Explain that to me, you were born with.
• 23:41
  Speaker 2: Your adult teeth already in your jaw underneath. Yeah bro,
• 23:44
  Speaker 2: wait what hang on? Yeah?
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: So if I X rayed the sign of Oscar's head,
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: he would have two layers of teeth. That's some sort
• 23:52
  Speaker 1: of freak.
• 23:53
  Speaker 3: Yeah there, shut up, they are there, no way, ye yep.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: I could be wrong.
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: Should be asked April, April come here please, I should
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: have said that more lovingly. Can we have you on
• 24:07
  Speaker 1: the mic just for one sec. We've got a question.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: I'm going to ask you a question and see if
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: you know the answer. I'm may be.
• 24:13
  Speaker 1: Wrong here because everyone that's listening. Yes, I I feel
• 24:17
  Speaker 1: like this is something in April would know.
• 24:18
  Speaker 2: Yes, April, do you know that you were born with
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: all your adult teeth already in your mouth? Yes?
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: I did, definitely. And then like if you were X
• 24:27
  Speaker 1: ray baby, you see the double whammy? Yeah?
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah? Are you fucking serious?
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: That is an outstand Macy? Do you want to come
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: and say something?
• 24:37
  Speaker 2: Say good night? No? No, Macy? Who's your best friend?
• 24:41
  Speaker 2: Can I MACI OpenD to be Macy? Thank you, Jay,
• 24:46
  Speaker 2: I love you. Oh mazee, that's so sweet of you.
• 24:49
  Speaker 1: Yes, I answer anyway, Sorry to completely hijack that I
• 24:54
  Speaker 1: am blown away.
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: My brother was only born with three adult teeth, so
• 24:59
  Speaker 2: the baby teeth never fell out because your adult teeth
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: weren't coming through and pushing them out.
• 25:03
  Speaker 1: They push him out.
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, dude, Yeah.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: My knowledge of anatomy is so hard. How did I
• 25:12
  Speaker 1: impregnate someone like that's my belly button?
• 25:17
  Speaker 2: Yeah?
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: If you put enough, don't get there, it'll say.
• 25:24
  Speaker 2: So my brother has to get all implants still. So yeah,
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: so does he still have his baby teeth still?
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: Get him on the phone right now.
• 25:32
  Speaker 2: If you're like google gegger, that's very offensive.
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: Shudder.
• 25:38
  Speaker 2: So he actually he got accepted as a case study
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: for the University of Queensland Dental School because it.
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: Was such a rare case dental school.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: So they he's not real, bro, it's like a circus
• 25:55
  Speaker 2: and they all it's a bunch of freaks. They drink
• 25:59
  Speaker 2: and they're watching it.
• 26:00
  Speaker 1: He got reaccepted back into daycare, so they.
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: Offered to do part of his dentistry. But the issue
• 26:07
  Speaker 2: was because he didn't have the adult teeth, his jaw
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: didn't grow, so he had to have his jaw broken,
• 26:11
  Speaker 2: and like yeah, it's oh my god, it's a journey.
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: To know what. There's some dentists behind that going, we've
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: got one. We've got one. We're going to make an
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: absolute motster out of this man, boy, child, whatever you
• 26:23
  Speaker 1: want to call him. He's going to tell We're just
• 26:26
  Speaker 1: going to tell him that he's got baby teeth.
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: He won't see the X rays, he won't know I'm
• 26:33
  Speaker 2: going to break his jaw. Shout out to Tom who
• 26:37
  Speaker 2: is single.
• 26:37
  Speaker 1: By the way, he sounds like a real cash.
• 26:42
  Speaker 2: So on the weekend, Ash we were looking at a
• 26:45
  Speaker 2: friend's property that's being renod So we said, how's it
• 26:49
  Speaker 2: going with the renovations, and they said, good. You know
• 26:51
  Speaker 2: the place, it's like a strip right back.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: Did you offer to do any work for them? You're like,
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: here's my number.
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: I'll pick up some wood for you if you need.
• 26:59
  Speaker 2: I was like, I can build decks. Didn't accept my offer,
• 27:02
  Speaker 2: that's fine, but they said you could go look at it.
• 27:05
  Speaker 2: The keys are hidden in this spot, so like around
• 27:07
  Speaker 2: the weekend, if you want, you can go have a
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: look because we've ripped out the kitchen, we've ripped out
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: the bathrooms. Like, you won't know the place because it's
• 27:13
  Speaker 2: completely demoed all like the skeleton framework. Good bones, great bones.
• 27:20
  Speaker 1: Boomers say that about a house. Yeah, it's a bit
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: of a it's a bit of a red eyed job.
• 27:25
  Speaker 1: It's got good bones. It's a fucking timber dickhead.
• 27:28
  Speaker 2: So we're looking at the house and it was in
• 27:30
  Speaker 2: the morning. I'd had my tripleshot coffee and as we're
• 27:33
  Speaker 2: walking through, well, you know, we're looking at the place
• 27:36
  Speaker 2: and wow, my god, it's going to be amazing with
• 27:38
  Speaker 2: the kitchen is going to go here, and the bathroom
• 27:39
  Speaker 2: will look great as well. So they ripped out pretty
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: much everything.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: Just before you continue, your friends have asked you to
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: come over and look at an empty house.
• 27:48
  Speaker 2: It's down the road, so it's empty. Yeah, we just said.
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: I thought. I was thinking, you're going to walk in
• 27:53
  Speaker 1: and be like, whoa, this is amazing. It's beautiful what
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: they've done to the place. But it's a fucking you
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: just said it's empty.
• 27:59
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a construction site, so like just taking a
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: good look. We were admiring. It's such a dad admiring
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: construction sign.
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: I'm coming straight down there.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: So we're walking through. Everything is pretty much gone except
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: for the toilet, and Laura has told the story stealing
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: the content of two doting dads on their podcast.
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Get Your Own Content.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: And I went to the toilet, I've done a pooh.
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: Was the water running well?
• 28:28
  Speaker 2: I didn't check. I just assumed. I assumed that, hey,
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: the builders are here. The builders have to go to
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: the toilet. So they ripped out everything except for the toilet,
• 28:35
  Speaker 2: so that obviously must be still in use.
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: I've got the builders sawna out the front, aren't.
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: They what's the builders saw?
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: Oh no, no, no, no, it wasn't.
• 28:41
  Speaker 2: There was no portally, so I was like, obviously the
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: toilets are still in use, and there was toilet paper,
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: fresh toilet paper.
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: Oh okay, well let's six again.
• 28:48
  Speaker 2: It wasn't.
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: Quinton dropped me deack, so I've done a poohick.
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: And gone to flush it. Nothing. Nothing, And I'm like,
• 28:56
  Speaker 2: oh god. And the big one it was me size
• 29:01
  Speaker 2: was I'm eating a lot of steak at the moment,
• 29:04
  Speaker 2: so they're very rich.
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: Have you taken up my diet?
• 29:06
  Speaker 2: You have?
• 29:07
  Speaker 1: Have you?
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: You know I'm not just eating I'm eating carbs as well,
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: but lots of steak. It was very stinky. I'll put
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: my hand up and s my poos do smell guilty
• 29:18
  Speaker 2: as charged. And Laura is like, oh my god, I
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: can't you've done that, and like it's fine. They must
• 29:23
  Speaker 2: have turned the water off. They'll turn it back on
• 29:24
  Speaker 2: now flush it. She goes, You've got to message them
• 29:26
  Speaker 2: and let them know that like that it's happened, and
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: I was like sure, sure, sure. So Laura doesn't know
• 29:33
  Speaker 2: this part, but I messaged and said I'm so sorry.
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: I'm messaging on behalf of Laura. She has done a
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: ship in the toilet and she's very embarrassed. Oh, we apologize,
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: it's great cause looks great.
• 29:50
  Speaker 1: Did they buy it?
• 29:51
  Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like, oh that's okay.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: It's a real big stinky one. She's ships heaves, it's
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: all the time. I told her not to do it.
• 29:57
  Speaker 1: The water's not it. Does she know now or I've
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: not told her this?
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: And yeah, I'll tell on her podcast.
• 30:06
  Speaker 1: She told them that, well.
• 30:07
  Speaker 2: She thinks that that was it. And Matt had to
• 30:09
  Speaker 2: message and and he you know, so she doesn't know.
• 30:12
  Speaker 2: I did message them, but I said it.
• 30:14
  Speaker 1: Was her, not me, cheeky bugger. Oops. So can you
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: please let us know reaction of this, because that as
• 30:21
  Speaker 1: a classic stitch up and that's something that I would
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: do to April that it'd be great.
• 30:25
  Speaker 2: Laura had to do it pooh as well. We like
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: to PuO and sink. And I was like just doing
• 30:30
  Speaker 2: doing in the garden. I was like, there's a shovel here,
• 30:33
  Speaker 2: I'll think you were whole and she was like, no,
• 30:34
  Speaker 2: the neighbors can see. And I was like, just do it.
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: And I called you yesterday and you're like, I just
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: had to stop at Macasa. Laura can do it. She's
• 30:42
  Speaker 1: a Shitter's a shiting machine. That reminds me of when
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: I used to be a painter, apprentice painter, and used
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: to work on high rises and surface paradise and early
• 30:52
  Speaker 1: on when the painters are in question.
• 30:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a high rise mostly glass or what
• 30:58
  Speaker 2: are you painting.
• 30:59
  Speaker 1: The inside of it? That you goose?
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: All right, don't have to yell.
• 31:02
  Speaker 1: I used to do the outside as well, and there
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: was like a lot of like around the back.
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: I don't need your last story, bro, gonna play tip,
• 31:11
  Speaker 2: don't you know?
• 31:11
  Speaker 1: Anyway, So when the pain has come in, not an analogy.
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: When the pain has come in, it's usually early on,
• 31:19
  Speaker 1: before the toilet's in. But there's always the toilet pipe
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: and there'd be some filthy plasters that will just ship
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: down the pipe walking. Sometimes you walk into one of the.
• 31:30
  Speaker 2: Units, you'll be like, do they wash it down with anything?
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: I just like because the water's not running up there?
• 31:36
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but could you get like a bucket of water
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: and nothing?
• 31:38
  Speaker 1: Just like, well, they didn't care that, you know. They
• 31:40
  Speaker 1: just snap it off. Animals they just snap it off
• 31:42
  Speaker 1: and move on with their day like a dog.
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: Oh, God. Yeah.
• 31:46
  Speaker 1: Anyway, that just reminded me of that.
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: It wouldn't last five minutes in that scenario.
• 31:51
  Speaker 1: Of jobs over there, falthy animal. Should we go into
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: parenting lies? It's back again.
• 32:00
  Speaker 2: Tell me loud, tell me.
• 32:07
  Speaker 1: All right, Matt. I have a couple of lines for
• 32:10
  Speaker 1: you that don't want to just quickly rattle off. Please,
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: people have written it.
• 32:13
  Speaker 2: I thought you would never ask.
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: Excuse me, I'm trying to get through a sentence talking
• 32:17
  Speaker 1: on the top of you. I always talk. I let's
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: all just calm down. Sorry you in particular, I really
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: got to hate it there. These are from people that
• 32:28
  Speaker 1: have written in Matt. So you can write into us
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: at two Doting Dads. You can d m us or
• 32:32
  Speaker 1: you can go to the Facebook group.
• 32:34
  Speaker 2: Which is absolutely pumping pumping. It is going off.
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: Pumping.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: My favorite used to be reading the reviews that we
• 32:45
  Speaker 2: don't really get that much of. My new favorite thing
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: is the request coming through in the Facebook grou Yeah.
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: I need to jump on and mate, get in there.
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: I've been busy this week.
• 32:54
  Speaker 2: People will fucking lose it if the big ash and
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: Weeks makes an appearance.
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: The big guy.
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: I've told them all that's a guys, guys, he's busy
• 33:03
  Speaker 2: moving house. Wait till he moves house. Then he'll come
• 33:06
  Speaker 2: here and you won't be able to get rid of him.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: Get him off here? Why is there a picture of
• 33:10
  Speaker 1: his petuts on here? Okay, so this one's been recent.
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: In really quick one, they say pumpkin is actually orange potato.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: I guess their kids must like potato then, right, Yeah,
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: if you kid likes potato, I suppose that's very good.
• 33:28
  Speaker 1: I got another quick one for you, which is I
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: really like? Because you know how we would always say
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: and we do get this one a lot. It's like
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: we always tell the kids, no, it's spicy, when it's not,
• 33:37
  Speaker 1: so that they don't have any It's a classic. That's
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: a classic. This says, my ice cream has wine in it.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: One more from me and I'm done.
• 33:48
  Speaker 2: Okay, three today you're treating me.
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: Treats sweet treats with wine in it. Keaton tells his
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: kid the naughty boy buss would come and pick him
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: up and take him away.
• 33:59
  Speaker 2: If you can tear you to be bad, the naughty
• 34:01
  Speaker 2: boy bus, the naughty boy bus.
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: To be honest, the naughty boy bus sounds pretty good. Oh,
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: Strippers on the naughty boy.
• 34:11
  Speaker 2: Bus Okay, this one's from Lee Lee Migow. Sometimes I'll
• 34:17
  Speaker 2: enjoy a cheeky ice cream after my kids are in bed.
• 34:20
  Speaker 1: Guilty yeah, and mcflurry after fucking Bawn.
• 34:26
  Speaker 2: And often my three year old finds the evidence in
• 34:28
  Speaker 2: the morning. My response, Yes, Santa was checking in on
• 34:33
  Speaker 2: us and he got really hungry.
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: That just on ice cream. Did you see that video
• 34:41
  Speaker 1: of the guy? And I try and find it for
• 34:42
  Speaker 1: socials If it works, it's like he's got the ice
• 34:45
  Speaker 1: cream and then it let us leap over the top
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: of it, and he's like you want some Like It's like, okay,
• 34:53
  Speaker 1: I offer.
• 34:54
  Speaker 2: It's very good, very very good. I've also got three.
• 34:58
  Speaker 1: Oh well eight treats all around.
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: Just spoiling the listeners. Ash, it is what nothing. Someone
• 35:08
  Speaker 2: just messaged you. Yes, I'm not going to tell you
• 35:11
  Speaker 2: what it says. Come on, he says, Ash. Thanks for
• 35:14
  Speaker 2: being such a great tenant. It's been a pleasure having
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: you here, and we look forward to hopefully crossing parts
• 35:20
  Speaker 2: once again in the future. Much love, that's a lie,
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: ps love the podcast and I bought your book.
• 35:26
  Speaker 1: Do you just plainly lie to me that whole thing?
• 35:29
  Speaker 2: He message? But it's an email.
• 35:30
  Speaker 1: It's an email. Yeah, good, okay.
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: Interesting name, Jessemine.
• 35:35
  Speaker 1: That's not a real name. Yeah, get that checked.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: Jess j E s A M. I N Jessemin. I
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: never met a Jessmine before. Interesting, beautiful name. Plenty of
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: time for Jessemine. If I have a third child, I'll
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: call it Jessemine.
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: Once my husband packed some Canadian clubs terrible drink Center Woods.
• 35:58
  Speaker 2: That's a first mistake into my then four year old's
• 36:02
  Speaker 2: luggage on a trip to the Gold Coast. My son
• 36:05
  Speaker 2: thought it was soft drink and cracked a can and
• 36:08
  Speaker 2: took a sip. He told us straight away. He must
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: have felt guilty. She says. I pretended to call a
• 36:14
  Speaker 2: nurse who told me if he didn't eat an apple,
• 36:17
  Speaker 2: he would have to have his stomach pumped. He's ten now,
• 36:21
  Speaker 2: and he often talks about his near miss of having
• 36:23
  Speaker 2: to go to hospital. At the time, I was impressed
• 36:26
  Speaker 2: with his ability to open a can, since he'd never
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: even had a soft drink before.
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: He's obviously seen a few times that can being opened.
• 36:34
  Speaker 2: Jessumine lacks a drink. Last one ash from Leela. Leela says,
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: whenever my daughter had a tantrum from toddler age. My
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: stepmom would say, look a mouse, and they'd run around
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: the house trying to look for it. It worked every
• 36:49
  Speaker 2: time to distract her. It's now been passed on to
• 36:51
  Speaker 2: my son and nieces and nephew. My daughter is nine
• 36:54
  Speaker 2: and I still think she looks for a mouse along
• 36:56
  Speaker 2: with her brother and a Cousin's so a distraction. My
• 36:58
  Speaker 2: mom does that, dude, No, my mom goes. My mom goes,
• 37:03
  Speaker 2: it's a white cat. It's a white cat in the backyard.
• 37:05
  Speaker 2: And Lola's like, what the fuck, so distraction, that's genius,
• 37:09
  Speaker 2: random animal.
• 37:10
  Speaker 1: I'm gonna try it.
• 37:11
  Speaker 2: Cut outside. Oh my god, it's a bluebird. Try it to.
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: I know you were saying that. Lola was like, shut up.
• 37:19
  Speaker 2: Just interrupting this episode to let you know that we
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: have partnered with GWM for this year's City to Surf.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: You may have seen recently on our socials that I
• 37:29
  Speaker 2: have taken on the role of head coach, whipping Ash
• 37:32
  Speaker 2: into shape, getting him race day ready. Because it's not
• 37:35
  Speaker 2: just Ash and myself completing the fourteen kilometers the eleventh
• 37:39
  Speaker 2: of August, We've decided to bring along the kids. Yes,
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: Marley and Oscar will be in a very special GWM
• 37:45
  Speaker 2: prem so if you're watching the race on the weekend,
• 37:48
  Speaker 2: feel free to give us as much encouragement as you can. Also,
• 37:53
  Speaker 2: one of the toughest parts of the race Heartbreak Hill.
• 37:56
  Speaker 2: If you see a struggling please jump on in give
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: us a and pushing the pram up the hill. We
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: will very much appreciate it. Well after the race, if
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: you and the kids are a little bit peckish, good news,
• 38:07
  Speaker 2: Ash and myself will be manning a barbecue down up
• 38:10
  Speaker 2: Bondeou Beach for a free sausage sizzle to come say hello.
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: GWM runs in the family. Now let's get back to
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: the episode questions.
• 38:19
  Speaker 1: I have a question for you, man, go on, it's
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: been burning at me for days. You've got two girls,
• 38:24
  Speaker 1: and I walked past a place that does ear piercing
• 38:29
  Speaker 1: the other day and there was a young girl in
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: there about Macy's as getting her ears pierced. Now I
• 38:34
  Speaker 1: felt a bit uneasy about it.
• 38:37
  Speaker 2: What made you feel an easier Let me just explain
• 38:40
  Speaker 2: to you.
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: How I felt in total as a whole. First of all,
• 38:43
  Speaker 1: I was like, there's a child being hurt. My first
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: initial reaction. It was also I don't know. I just
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: felt like for the parents, not judging. Dave decided that
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: now it is the right time for them to you know,
• 38:58
  Speaker 1: that's their business. But at the same time, I felt like,
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: wouldn't that really hurt the child? And is she not
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: happy with the situation? She didn't seem unhappy.
• 39:07
  Speaker 2: Was the child screaming?
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: No?
• 39:08
  Speaker 2: No, she was shut up? You keep on walking, man.
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: Well look, this is what I mean. I was nervous
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: for That's what it was. I was nervous for her impending.
• 39:19
  Speaker 1: I've got I've had my ears piers before. How have
• 39:22
  Speaker 1: you both of them?
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: Did you? Did you have a little diamond one? What
• 39:27
  Speaker 2: do you have? Oops?
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: No, they were pearls. They were love list stole above
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: the maid. Yes, I did have my ears pears. Shocker.
• 39:38
  Speaker 2: What kind of studs did you have?
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: They were like black?
• 39:41
  Speaker 2: It's racist.
• 39:43
  Speaker 1: It was very emo. Right where are you?
• 39:47
  Speaker 2: I forget that. You get a big emo face?
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: I did not.
• 39:50
  Speaker 2: We went to bling I too, and you sang every
• 39:53
  Speaker 2: single word.
• 39:55
  Speaker 1: That's just being a millennial.
• 39:57
  Speaker 2: How old were you ash when you got your ears?
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: I was like seventeen and my dad hated it.
• 40:02
  Speaker 2: Did it hurt?
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 40:04
  Speaker 2: For how long? Afterwards it feels like.
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: Years a while, but I was like, so a couple
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: of mixed emotions. I think I was just nervous the
• 40:12
  Speaker 1: little girl with a pending paint. But then I was
• 40:14
  Speaker 1: also like, what age is the right age? Is there
• 40:18
  Speaker 1: a wrong age? Like for you with two girls and
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: I've got Macy, she's quite young. I still think it
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: would be too young, But what age do you think?
• 40:25
  Speaker 2: I think you put it on the kids. I think
• 40:29
  Speaker 2: I've seen toddler's getting the ear If I.
• 40:32
  Speaker 1: Said to Oscar, do you want to get a tattoo?
• 40:33
  Speaker 2: Like, yeah, given one, then dude, I've seen toddlers get
• 40:38
  Speaker 2: the ear piers. I think that's too young. But I
• 40:40
  Speaker 2: think if your child Marley has asked to have ears pierce.
• 40:44
  Speaker 2: She sometimes loves with stickers, to put the stickers on
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: the ear and be like, look, daddy, I got my
• 40:49
  Speaker 2: ears piers, And I'm like, that's great. If she genuinely
• 40:52
  Speaker 2: wanted to get it done, I'd be like, yeah, if
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: you really it's gonna hurt. If you really want.
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: It, you wouldn't force it upon them, though, Nah.
• 40:59
  Speaker 2: No, up to them. I remember, I just vivid. There's
• 41:02
  Speaker 2: some memories just stick.
• 41:03
  Speaker 1: Out that's called trauma.
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: My sister, I think she must have been about twelve.
• 41:11
  Speaker 2: She was getting her ears pierced and I was with
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: her and Mum in the shopping center while she was
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: getting done. I remember the screams she was hiding, like
• 41:19
  Speaker 2: under the bed we sit on to get it done
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: and being like no, And I remember which she wanted
• 41:24
  Speaker 2: them to done. She wanted it done. She just freaked
• 41:26
  Speaker 2: out when when it came to the moment of getting
• 41:28
  Speaker 2: it done, it's like going on a roller coaster that
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: like sex.
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: I guess I get scared.
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I just remember that moment of her being
• 41:37
  Speaker 2: like wow, like why do people get this done? But
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: if Marley came to me and said, I really want
• 41:41
  Speaker 2: my ears pierced, and she continued with that request for
• 41:46
  Speaker 2: a couple of weeks, and I was saying, it's really
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: going to hert but if you really want it done,
• 41:49
  Speaker 2: we can go get it done. She wants it, sure
• 41:52
  Speaker 2: would you.
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: I think it's like it's to show her like a
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: YouTube of at first, but this is what's going to
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: happen to see. It's not that you want to deter.
• 41:59
  Speaker 2: Them, like I think it's a good introduction to pain making.
• 42:06
  Speaker 2: Decisions and those repercussions.
• 42:08
  Speaker 1: Very well said, not the medical advice either, not a psychology.
• 42:13
  Speaker 2: I wanted to get my ears pierced, but my mom
• 42:15
  Speaker 2: wouldn't let me. I had frosted tips and I was like,
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: all I need now is an ear piercing and they
• 42:18
  Speaker 2: look as complete.
• 42:23
  Speaker 1: She was like, I wonder if they could, if we
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: could get a video of and sync and superpose our
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: heads to it. I just mental note, that'd be fun
• 42:37
  Speaker 1: edge myself to it. I've said edging three times in
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: the one episode.
• 42:41
  Speaker 2: Question for you. Yes, we had this one come in.
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: I can't remember the name, but it stood out. There's
• 42:46
  Speaker 2: been a unique question, how many times do your kids
• 42:49
  Speaker 2: fart per day?
• 42:51
  Speaker 1: Let me just get the let me get the notepad
• 42:53
  Speaker 1: out of tally them up. No, I don't tally him up.
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: I would say, my kids get accused of fighting more
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: than the actual fart. Oh you're I'm like Oscar. It
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: was me this guy, and because Macy can't fight back,
• 43:05
  Speaker 1: it's always ends up being Macy.
• 43:06
  Speaker 2: But surely April must Another difference between like a Macy
• 43:09
  Speaker 2: or Oscar fart versus.
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: Your yeah not quite trumpety also smell wise, yeah, Macy stinks.
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: Marley's stink changed the nappy. The other day, I saw
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: anus wink, Oh my god, and I was like, that's one.
• 43:33
  Speaker 2: You know what, you know what's funny though, I don't
• 43:35
  Speaker 2: know if your kids are similar. In the car this morning,
• 43:40
  Speaker 2: I let her a fart and it's all the steak
• 43:42
  Speaker 2: that makes maybe very very sticky farts are good. They're like, dude,
• 43:45
  Speaker 2: they're so pungent. And the kids in the back of
• 43:48
  Speaker 2: the car, Lolla just goes, hey, someone fart, and I go, yeah,
• 43:52
  Speaker 2: it was me as she goes, and they're not that
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: affected by the smell, like they were like all right.
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: I just think it's so normal. Yeah, But like as
• 44:00
  Speaker 1: you get older, it gets funnier and more frowned upon.
• 44:02
  Speaker 2: And also at what age do people start getting more
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: disgusted in farts?
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: I think there's like a scale, not a scale, like
• 44:10
  Speaker 1: a graph, and you go from being it funny to
• 44:13
  Speaker 1: being it's disgusting, back to it being funny again. And
• 44:17
  Speaker 1: like our age now so funny, farst of the best.
• 44:22
  Speaker 2: So like if Laura does a fart, that's like I'm like,
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: that's funny. When Laura does a fine and it's.
• 44:26
  Speaker 3: Like I'm like ah, it's like a hot like a
• 44:32
  Speaker 3: hot sigh, like.
• 44:36
  Speaker 1: A hot sigh out of her rain hot si oh
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: where did that come from? All? Right?
• 44:51
  Speaker 2: Like this morning I had this sigh the deep depths
• 44:53
  Speaker 2: of summer. Sorry, Laura, I love you.
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: I fucking lost it now. I was in the car
• 45:05
  Speaker 1: this morning with the heater on and my father. Than
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: that hit different.
• 45:10
  Speaker 2: There's a couple of farts a hot sigh but in
• 45:13
  Speaker 2: a sauna.
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: Oh yeah, what about like when you're fart in the
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: shower and it's like so much stinkier a hot sigh
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: in the shower.
• 45:24
  Speaker 2: Okay, let's let's get out of here.
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: That's not far.
• 45:29
  Speaker 2: If you've enjoyed this episode, maybe please send it on
• 45:35
  Speaker 2: to anyone out there who you think may benefit in
• 45:38
  Speaker 2: some way. Yeah, maybe just keep it to yourself. Also,
• 45:43
  Speaker 2: we love a review, either a upper podcast or Spotify.
• 45:46
  Speaker 2: It is the only thing that keeps Ashen myself happy
• 45:51
  Speaker 2: in this mad world.
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: We'll go and join the Facebook group at dads on
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: Facebook and we will accept you. We'll accept anybody want
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: to enjoy it.
• 46:00
  Speaker 2: The longest wait is about one hour so far. Oh,
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: I do have the very first ten people who joined
• 46:06
  Speaker 2: the Facebook group I'm going to give them a prize
• 46:10
  Speaker 2: other people who join it. But I think that's it.
• 46:15
  Speaker 2: That's it today, and we'll see you guys. No, actually
• 46:19
  Speaker 2: Ash is away next week.
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: I am someone's going to be filling in, so it's Laura,
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: Laura and potentially Ellie as well. Enjoy that one. Enjoy
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: say hi, just make sure everything's running smoothly perfect Beau.
• 46:45
  Speaker 2: Two. Doting Dad's podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 46:49
  Speaker 2: throughout Australia and the connections to land, sea and community.
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torrestraight Islander
• 46:58
  Speaker 1: people's today. This episode was recorded on Gadagal Land