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What signs suggest I’m at my limit? · Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: Caring for someone takes a great deal of energy, and many carers reach a point where they have very little left to give.
• 0:07
  SPEAKER_00: This is often called care or burnout as it builds gradually, which makes it harder to spot in yourself.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: So, what might the signs suggest that you're at your limit?
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  SPEAKER_00: So emotionally, you might feel helpless or hopeless with thoughts like things will never get better, you may be more irritable or react strongly to small things that never used to bother you.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: You might feel numb or distant from the person you care for or feel guilty about.
• 0:31
  SPEAKER_00: Physically, you may be exhausted in a way that a good night's sleep just simply isn't going to fix, or your sleep may be disturbed, or you may be sleeping far too much.
• 0:39
  SPEAKER_00: Your appetite may change and you may notice headaches, stomach issues, or other new or worsened health issues.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: And in day-to-day life, you might notice yourself pulling away from your friends and family, losing interest in things you used to enjoy, or let your own basics slide like skipping meals or missing your own appointments.
• 0:55
  SPEAKER_00: And noticing several of these over a period of time suggests that you're probably reaching your limit.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_00: Now, guilt often comes with these signs, along with thoughts like, I should be able to cope.
• 1:06
  SPEAKER_00: And I suggest you try testing that thought.
• 1:09
  SPEAKER_00: So, what would you say to a friend who described the exact same things to you?
• 1:12
  SPEAKER_00: And most of us would respond with kindness and encourage them to get support, and feeling no more resentful at times is a common response when energy runs low, and it tells you that you need support as well.
• 1:24
  SPEAKER_00: And practical ways to support yourself with this might be to choose one small thing for your own health this week, like a 15-minute walk or an early night or a proper lunch.
• 1:33
  SPEAKER_00: You might ask someone for specific help, for example, could you stay with them for an hour on Saturday so I can get out?
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_00: And you might just tell one trusted person how you have really been feeling as well.
• 1:45
  SPEAKER_00: Now it might be useful to book an appointment with your GP if you notice these signs, especially lessened exhaustion, low mood, anxiety or changes in sleeping appetite.
• 1:55
  SPEAKER_00: They can look at how caring is affecting your health and talk to you about counselling or other support.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_00: Your local counsellor can arrange a carer's assessment, which is your legal right, and look at options such as respite, which means a break from caring.
• 2:07
  SPEAKER_00: There's also the carers UK helpline, which offers advice, and a therapist that can also give you space to talk through what you are carrying as well.
• 2:15
  SPEAKER_00: And you can go back to the ATT's resources on knowing when to ask for help for further support on this matter.
• 2:20
  SPEAKER_00: And if you are thinking about harming yourself or feeling safe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency number or a crisis helpline.