Latest / The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast / S4 #12 From Winter Games to Winter Break

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S4 #12 From Winter Games to Winter Break · The Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: This is the Benn and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast
• 0:03
  Speaker 1: with our radio. Hey everybody, Uh, today just doesn't seem
• 0:10
  Speaker 1: like the most happiest of days for the Almost Amous podcast.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: We're gonna start out a little odd. I mean, I
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: feel like we have to. There's no other option. I
• 0:20
  Speaker 1: have my co host, actually Connettie in studio. Um. Actually
• 0:25
  Speaker 1: I wanted to start out, how are you doing? I
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: am fine, I'm I'm good, Ben, I am. I mean,
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: it's a sad situation. Obviously, you guys do not always
• 0:35
  Speaker 1: say obviously, but some of you out there may have
• 0:38
  Speaker 1: heard that Kevin and I split up, and obviously all
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: breakups are not pleasant. Yeah, so for anybody out there listening, UM,
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: my wonderful and beautiful co host Ashley was dating, um
• 0:55
  Speaker 1: Kevin from Bachelor Winter Games. Uh, they had a relationship
• 0:59
  Speaker 1: from my first set then. I don't want to speak
• 1:00
  Speaker 1: for Astley and I'll let to actually speak for yourself here,
• 1:03
  Speaker 1: but from my perspective, it was one that was supportive. Um,
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: they cared a ton for each other. But unfortunately, just
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: like uh, some really great relationships do, and we'll talk
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: about that later on the podcast. Um, this relationship ended
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: and and because actually is a huge part of this podcast.
• 1:22
  Speaker 1: We we didn't know any other way to do the
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: podcast but to talk about it, and we're lucky enough
• 1:26
  Speaker 1: to have Astley in studio. And then we're also going
• 1:28
  Speaker 1: to bring Kevin on UM, so two of them can
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: talk to share their perspective. I'll try to walk them
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: through this. What I do want to say is just
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: shows that both people have a lot of respect for
• 1:39
  Speaker 1: each other and a lot of love and a lot
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: of care if they're willing to come out and talk
• 1:42
  Speaker 1: to each other even post break up on air and
• 1:46
  Speaker 1: life for all of you. So actually, thank you. UM,
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: what exactly is your relationship like with Kevin today? I
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: I think we're totally We're totally friends. When he comes
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: out to l A next or if I ever find
• 1:59
  Speaker 1: myself in Toronto, I we will be seeing each other
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: for sure. Um. Everybody knows that I stay pretty close
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: to my exes, between Jared and Wells, Um, you know,
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: I'm in good terms with all of them and consider
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: them both really good friends. I do want to say, like,
• 2:18
  Speaker 1: why do you do that? Why do you stay so
• 2:20
  Speaker 1: close that I guess like when there's somebody is so
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: important in your life and somebody got along with and
• 2:26
  Speaker 1: cared about and loved as a person so much that
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: you just can't. I just find that it's it's weird
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: to eliminate them from your life and it didn't work
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: out romantically for some reason, but doesn't mean that you
• 2:37
  Speaker 1: can't still be friends. I mean, of course, if it
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: was like a nasty breakup, or I broke up with him,
• 2:44
  Speaker 1: or we broke up for reasons that or you know,
• 2:48
  Speaker 1: hostile because like we genuinely didn't get along, that's one thing.
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: But if it's just like not there then and it's
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: not like a long term, like this is my person
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: type of ing, then it's different. If you want to
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: be friends afterwards, I mean that's something we've talked about
• 3:05
  Speaker 1: in the podcast before and and just to refresh anybody, actually,
• 3:09
  Speaker 1: when is that no longer appropriate or is there ever
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: not appropriate to stay friends with your exes and stay
• 3:15
  Speaker 1: in communication with them. I feel like it just depends
• 3:18
  Speaker 1: what the current relationship is like and what the previous
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: relationship was like. I think there's been situations in my
• 3:25
  Speaker 1: life that I stayed close to max Is. Actually, I
• 3:28
  Speaker 1: would say I have a decent relationship with all of them,
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: but some look different than others. You know, for example,
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: my relationship in college with somebody that I cared a
• 3:36
  Speaker 1: ton about that I love. When we broke up, we
• 3:38
  Speaker 1: didn't talk for two years, but today we can have
• 3:41
  Speaker 1: a good conversation and talk very openly about life, and
• 3:44
  Speaker 1: we we have a lot of respect for each other. Well,
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: that took time, and so I don't know, it's just
• 3:49
  Speaker 1: like the easy out and this as well, it takes
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: time to kind of figure out what that relationship is
• 3:53
  Speaker 1: gonna look like, or to even see if he is
• 3:55
  Speaker 1: dire to still have a relationship with that person. I mean,
• 3:58
  Speaker 1: I think the unique thing for you to actute and
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: I want to hear you know kind of this is
• 4:02
  Speaker 1: not that you stay close with your but that you
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: stay close with them right away. It's almost like, you know,
• 4:08
  Speaker 1: have you allowed yourself the time to feel bit um.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: I think with Kevin, we like, you know, I'm really
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: bad at this. Um. I think that maybe the reason
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: I've stayed close to the two particular exes we're referring
• 4:25
  Speaker 1: to is because in the bachelor family, it's hard to
• 4:29
  Speaker 1: avoid them and ignore them. So as mine as well,
• 4:33
  Speaker 1: just be friends because you're probably gonna have to see
• 4:35
  Speaker 1: them pretty much right away anyway. So with Kevin, because
• 4:38
  Speaker 1: we're so closely associated in public, I feel like that's
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: a reason that like we may jump into a friendship
• 4:44
  Speaker 1: quicker then I would if I was just like a regular,
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: like a regular X who like I could actually just
• 4:51
  Speaker 1: distance myself from in every way. I mean, but I
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: mean I think for me, you know, I had a
• 4:57
  Speaker 1: relationship in the backs of franchise, and it's hard for
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: me to see myself. You know, if I ran into Laurence,
• 5:04
  Speaker 1: they would be really hard, not because I dislike her,
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: but it would be really hard on me. And so
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: I just think it's either one impressive, two new and
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: kind of modern to have such a quick relationship, or
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: three one an explanation from you, because I think it is.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: I think it is something that's not a lot of
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: people can do, is become friends with their actors. I
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: mean you and you and Kevin announced your breakup when
• 5:27
  Speaker 1: um it was announced on Monday, but it happened last week.
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: I think it's actually it's all about how we broke
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: up and why. So I think we should discuss that more.
• 5:39
  Speaker 1: Why is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, So it's the okay,
• 5:43
  Speaker 1: first off. He is like the most um like he's
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: I don't want to use cliche as like amazing, he's
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: so sweet like he is, he's like so like sugary.
• 5:51
  Speaker 1: He like truly is like just a genuine nice guy.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: And you can vouch for him on that. He's very protective,
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: like not just in like the physical way that he
• 6:01
  Speaker 1: wants to provide and protect for his woman and his family,
• 6:05
  Speaker 1: which I love the old fashioned the romance of that all,
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: but he also means I also mean that like emotionally,
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: like he just wants to be that rock for his
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: person and to be completely there for them emotionally and
• 6:19
  Speaker 1: completely committed to someone like that is what he desires,
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: and I think that is just so beautiful And yeah,
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: he just he wants to create that safe space or
• 6:28
  Speaker 1: someone and the way that he cares about me and
• 6:32
  Speaker 1: I'm sure whoever he's with and he cherishes me, it's
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: it's just it's what every girl wants, and it's just
• 6:40
  Speaker 1: it's sad way it doesn't work out. And the reason
• 6:43
  Speaker 1: that he doesn't it didn't work out here is I
• 6:46
  Speaker 1: just feel like there was like a lack of connection.
• 6:48
  Speaker 1: I don't want to blame distance. I would never blame distance. UM.
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: I know that it's been in some of the articles,
• 6:53
  Speaker 1: but I am like a strong believer that I would
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: move or at least make it work for the love
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: of life, even if they were on the other side
• 7:01
  Speaker 1: of the country, like the planet um. But for us,
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: it was just like a lack of connection and like
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: I think mental chemistry. Obviously the physical chemistry was there.
• 7:10
  Speaker 1: We won the kissing competition, but to quote Carrie Bradshaw,
• 7:15
  Speaker 1: as you hate when I do, it was just missing
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: that Zaza zoo and I think I think after three
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: months you kind of know, like, if this isn't my person,
• 7:25
  Speaker 1: if this isn't my soulmate, my future husband, you have
• 7:28
  Speaker 1: to let it go because it's just not fair for
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: both of you, and especially at the ages we're out.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: I told Kevin, I was like, if we were in
• 7:38
  Speaker 1: our mid twenties and we wanted to be boyfriend and girlfriend,
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: like I think we could have been boyfriend and girlfriend
• 7:42
  Speaker 1: for a long time, but as two people who are
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: very marriage focused, UM, at thirty and thirty four, I
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: think that the best thing to do is like, if
• 7:50
  Speaker 1: this isn't my forever, we should just end it now
• 7:53
  Speaker 1: without keeping it just lingering through trips here and there.
• 7:59
  Speaker 1: It is that how the conversation went down. You brought
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: this up to him and just said, Hey, I'm not
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: I'm not feeling that. The connection isn't there. You know,
• 8:06
  Speaker 1: we're being to the age where we just can't play
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: around anymore. I think as seems we've done m Yeah. Um,
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: I just knew, you know, I have been feeling those
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: feelings for like a couple of weeks leading up to
• 8:17
  Speaker 1: the conversation, and it was our first deep, sit down
• 8:22
  Speaker 1: conversation for a couple of days. Like I was just
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: so bombarded with a birthday in the Bachelor finale and stuff,
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: and I just thought, I was like, I think this
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: is going to be the phone call because we have
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: to come up with a trip to see each other.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: And I don't know if that would be right to
• 8:36
  Speaker 1: do right now, because I think it would just lead
• 8:39
  Speaker 1: this whole thing on a dragging journey. Yeah. I actually
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: I listened to you here and I wonder how heavy
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: was this, Like, how heavy was this on your heart,
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: on your shoulders, and on your mind? So much I've
• 8:53
  Speaker 1: never felt like this before. It was the hardest thing ever.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: It was the hardest conversation to have it just in
• 9:01
  Speaker 1: your life, have you actually broke up with somebody? Obviously,
• 9:06
  Speaker 1: never before, never before. This is the first time. I mean,
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: walk me through that. I hate to say that I
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: broke up with him, but like, you know, I feel
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: like I asked him, I go, do you really think
• 9:18
  Speaker 1: I'm your forever person? And he's like, I don't really
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: know if I thought about that before, and I was like, well,
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: I think got three months. At these ages, you should
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: be thinking about that. And if you're not, he was like, maybe,
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: since I haven't, that's probably a sign that you're not.
• 9:30
  Speaker 1: And I'm like, yes, probably, yeah, but you you're going
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: into it with the intention that this was probably going
• 9:36
  Speaker 1: to be the conversation that ended thing. So walk for
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: all of our listeners out there, because most of the
• 9:44
  Speaker 1: people listen to this podcast, or most of the people
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: who will listen to this podcast, at some point in
• 9:49
  Speaker 1: their life will either be in a breakup go through
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: a breakup, and I guess that is one of the
• 9:55
  Speaker 1: themes of this podcast is we all get broken up
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: with or we're all gonna be the person that has
• 10:01
  Speaker 1: to break up with somebody at some point in our life.
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: A relationship will end. As unfortunate as that is, it
• 10:07
  Speaker 1: is just part of life. Actually going into that week,
• 10:11
  Speaker 1: preparing for that conversation with Kevin, like, how are you feeling?
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: It was the worst feeling I've ever had. Like I've
• 10:16
  Speaker 1: always been on the other side of the relationship, you know,
• 10:20
  Speaker 1: I've always been the one that's like holding on and
• 10:22
  Speaker 1: knowing the breakup is coming, and it is the worst
• 10:25
  Speaker 1: feeling in the entire world. So I've never been like
• 10:28
  Speaker 1: I've had like a feeling in my chest all week,
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: you know, just like that heaviness in your heart. It's
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: not just an expression, It's like something that your body
• 10:35
  Speaker 1: physically feels. And I've never been so overwhelmed with empathy
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: and compassion just because I've been on that side so
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: many times. Um, it's just a horrible, horrible feeling. And yeah,
• 10:48
  Speaker 1: it does. It does make you ask, like that debate
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: would you rather break up with somebody or would you
• 10:53
  Speaker 1: rather be broken up with because both are horrible, especially
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: when the person is so terrific, like they have the
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: best heart and soul. All they do is want to
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: care for you, and it makes it difficult because you know,
• 11:07
  Speaker 1: like there's there's those relationships were like, no, we're fighting,
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: and like there's this about this person. I can't live
• 11:12
  Speaker 1: with that. But it's just when there's a lack of spark,
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: and that's the only thing. Really, those are the hardest breakups.
• 11:20
  Speaker 1: I get it. I mean, and it doesn't help that
• 11:24
  Speaker 1: the person that you recently just broke up with is
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: coming on to this podcast here in a second. But
• 11:30
  Speaker 1: it also shows a side of you actually that that
• 11:34
  Speaker 1: I know we all appreciate, and that's the fact that
• 11:36
  Speaker 1: you can um keep a respectable relationship. Uh and that
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: you treat your your significant others so well that they
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: have a hard time getting getting you out of their
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: life at all, and they'd rather just even be friends
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: with you. Uh and and and the opposite would be
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: losing you completely. So I think it's it's incredible relationship
• 11:55
  Speaker 1: you can keep with Kevin. Yeah, well I'm really glad
• 11:58
  Speaker 1: because I just don't under you know, I know it's
• 12:00
  Speaker 1: hard to be friends with somebody afterward, but if you
• 12:03
  Speaker 1: leave it on such good terms and you really enjoy
• 12:06
  Speaker 1: each other as people as mine as well. You know.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: I'm not saying he's going to be a huge part
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: of my daily or weekly life, but like am I
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: going to check in with him, never every now and then. Yeah,
• 12:15
  Speaker 1: but I he he appreciated the fact that I was
• 12:18
  Speaker 1: so honest with him, and it was so hard, you know, honesty,
• 12:23
  Speaker 1: he's honestly so hard. It's hard. I don't know what
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: else to say. But you don't want to drive people along,
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: you know, It's like you gotta rip the band aid
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: off because in the long run, if you drag it
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: out and you keep like sugarcoating it all, it's going
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: to make them feel even worse. It's funny because I
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: remember when Wells was on this podcast like six months
• 12:43
  Speaker 1: ago talking about how he did that with me. He
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: was like, but don't you like the fact that I
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: didn't sugarcoat it? And I was like, no, I needed
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: delivered with more sensitivity. You you deliver it with sensitivity.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: But like, yes, being honest with the person and not
• 12:58
  Speaker 1: stringing them along is the best way to do it.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: I I completely agree. So let's let's drip the band
• 13:03
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• 13:04
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• 13:06
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• 13:15
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• 15:00
  Speaker 1: on now to bring in the other person that's been
• 15:02
  Speaker 1: affected by this relationship, this just steals to me. Um,
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: not odd, it actually kind of feels healthy. I am
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: ecstatic to introduce this person. I think he is an
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: incredible man. I was so excited that he was with
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: one of my closest and best friends. Actually, um, I
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: have a whole dis guy to a very high regard. Kevin,
• 15:23
  Speaker 1: are you on the line with us? I'm here, Bud Kevin.
• 15:26
  Speaker 1: Welcome to the Almost Famous podcast. Thank you for coming
• 15:29
  Speaker 1: on here. Hey guys, thanks for uh, Kevin, we just
• 15:35
  Speaker 1: uh we just said and talking to actually um kind
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: of breaking down um, your relationship from her perspective, Kevin,
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: before we get started, there's been a kind of a
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: question that was brought up and and for all of
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: our listeners out there, please email us at ben in
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: Ashley iHeart media dot com with your thoughts on this.
• 15:54
  Speaker 1: It's interesting you and actually can stay friends so quickly
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: after a breakup, and you like this is common? Is
• 16:01
  Speaker 1: this something that's happened your life before? Is it healthy?
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Can can you kind of walk us through that? Uh?
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: You know what? I think, I think we kind of
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: started on friendship. Like I think the way me and
• 16:11
  Speaker 1: her clicked when we first met, I just knew the
• 16:15
  Speaker 1: way we kind of laughed enough to have to go
• 16:17
  Speaker 1: about everything. I just felt like it was there was
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: a connection that you know, depending on or or no
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: matter what happens down down the line, I always just
• 16:24
  Speaker 1: felt like we had a good connection from the start. Um,
• 16:27
  Speaker 1: and I feel like there's no there's nothing nothing happened
• 16:30
  Speaker 1: between us. I think a lot of excess you might
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: not remain friends if there was an event that happened.
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: I think asking and I just got put into a
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: situation and in this franchise, I mean it happens all
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: the time where um, you kind of fall for the
• 16:43
  Speaker 1: person first and then all the logistics or the long
• 16:47
  Speaker 1: term thought process comes later. Um. And I feel like
• 16:52
  Speaker 1: there's no there's nothing between us as negative, so there's
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: no reason we can't be friends. And we still get
• 16:56
  Speaker 1: along so so great. I still, you know, text to
• 16:59
  Speaker 1: every day, see she's doing. It's not like it's a
• 17:02
  Speaker 1: I feel like you really have to have a negative
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: thing happened. If two people cared about each other at
• 17:06
  Speaker 1: any point the arrived, you should be able to remain
• 17:08
  Speaker 1: friends unless there was a negative thing happened. That's how
• 17:10
  Speaker 1: I feel. That's exactly what I said. It was like
• 17:13
  Speaker 1: we had a hustle breakup. It was like get along
• 17:15
  Speaker 1: really well, just taking the romance out of it. Yeah,
• 17:18
  Speaker 1: I mean, the one thing I will say, I think
• 17:21
  Speaker 1: I did bring it up to actually like it was.
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: It was square away. I'm a pretty like black and
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: white guy, and I'm really working on trying to live
• 17:27
  Speaker 1: in the gray area a little bit more. And I
• 17:29
  Speaker 1: remember right when we got back from Vermont, Um, I
• 17:32
  Speaker 1: was in Florida for Christmas and We had facetimes a
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: few times right away, and I think I even brought
• 17:36
  Speaker 1: it up really early, like long term question, like the
• 17:39
  Speaker 1: stupid guy that I am like already thinking down the road.
• 17:43
  Speaker 1: And her response was can we just enjoy this for
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: a while? And then I kind of paste off her
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: and said, yeah, let's do that, because they still be
• 17:50
  Speaker 1: a fun experience. I was coming to l A for
• 17:52
  Speaker 1: a whole bunch of the month of February, and I
• 17:54
  Speaker 1: was gonna be staying with her, and we had a
• 17:55
  Speaker 1: bunch of plans um in January as well, but I
• 17:59
  Speaker 1: just kind of let her control hole and not let me.
• 18:01
  Speaker 1: I'm usually a bit of a control freak. I like
• 18:03
  Speaker 1: to kind of know where I'm going next, and this
• 18:06
  Speaker 1: time I decided to try to be the passenger a
• 18:08
  Speaker 1: little bit and say, let's just enjoy each other's company
• 18:10
  Speaker 1: and get to know each other, have our fun experience,
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: and then we'll take it from there. And I think
• 18:15
  Speaker 1: we've kind of put the serious talk that a lot
• 18:17
  Speaker 1: of people have, um, we put it on the back
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: burner and just enjoyed and enjoyed the process and enjoyed
• 18:22
  Speaker 1: getting to know each other before we had to kind
• 18:24
  Speaker 1: of answer those tough questions. We're the tough questions. Is
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: the one that, in your opinion, Kevin ultimately pulled you apart?
• 18:31
  Speaker 1: Or was there anything else? I feel like when you
• 18:35
  Speaker 1: start off in the long distance relationship, it's, um, it's
• 18:39
  Speaker 1: kind of a double edged story. You need to live
• 18:41
  Speaker 1: in the same place to know if you're compatible forever.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: But in order for somebody to really uploot their life
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: and go somewhere, you feel like you want to be
• 18:48
  Speaker 1: going for this for that person forever. And I know
• 18:51
  Speaker 1: in certain situations in your life. I know, Um, I
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: did have a long distance relationship in my early twenties
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: and my girlfriend was in school so she transferred schools.
• 19:00
  Speaker 1: We dated for a year, it didn't work out, and
• 19:02
  Speaker 1: we're still friends, and that was fine. But now that
• 19:04
  Speaker 1: I'm in my thirties and and actually as well, I
• 19:06
  Speaker 1: know you're not big on Like my life is pretty
• 19:10
  Speaker 1: established here and I'm not saying I wouldn't move for
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: the right relationship. UM, I just feel like you have
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: to be very sure, you have to be kind of
• 19:17
  Speaker 1: over that hump, and after spending so much time out there, um,
• 19:21
  Speaker 1: kind of being a fanboy of actually and you know,
• 19:23
  Speaker 1: getting to see her life a little bit out there,
• 19:25
  Speaker 1: and I realized she's so meant for that. But she's
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: I'm just very proud of her. She's a very she's
• 19:30
  Speaker 1: a very meant to be in l A. And I'm
• 19:33
  Speaker 1: a huge fan of her. UM. And I realized when
• 19:36
  Speaker 1: you when I really get down to it, would I
• 19:38
  Speaker 1: moved there? Um? I would, but a lot of stuff
• 19:40
  Speaker 1: would have to happen first, And if I would ever
• 19:42
  Speaker 1: bring her here, even though I love the city of
• 19:44
  Speaker 1: Toronto and I love living here, UM, I would always
• 19:47
  Speaker 1: feel like I'm going to be resented eventually because it
• 19:49
  Speaker 1: doesn't have the same career opportunity. And I think she's
• 19:51
  Speaker 1: going to be a huge sat I think your thirties
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: are going to be the best years of your life.
• 19:54
  Speaker 1: And I just I wasn't able to get over that
• 19:57
  Speaker 1: that hump, and actually was it was actually that um
• 20:01
  Speaker 1: kind of it was good to her to let me
• 20:04
  Speaker 1: enjoy the process, because when I did go through this
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: kind of the first time, UM, I made similar mistakes.
• 20:10
  Speaker 1: Were right when I was I was engaged off into
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: the television show. I was right away thinking like, when
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: are we doing this? And it was one of my
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: faults that I had I didn't just let it happen.
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: And I think the great thing about the way I
• 20:21
  Speaker 1: actually approached it was like that Vermont experience was so
• 20:25
  Speaker 1: fun that you guys both know I had a great
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: time there, and um, I was so glad. I meant, actually,
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: I think we had a really really good bond together. Um.
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: I think just once you got into the real world, UM,
• 20:35
  Speaker 1: we kind of experienced how each of us lived individually
• 20:38
  Speaker 1: and realized that it just didn't mesh. I think I
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: actually said it's me pretty well the other day. You
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: can meet somebody that's meant to be in your life
• 20:46
  Speaker 1: and meant to be an important part of your life,
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: that doesn't necessarily mean they have to be here forever
• 20:50
  Speaker 1: like person, and I see actually as someone that I
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: will never not think the best of and not want
• 20:55
  Speaker 1: to call and see as she's doing. I just don't think, um,
• 20:59
  Speaker 1: I don't think that were our lives line up to
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: kind of take that next step. And I actually really
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: appreciate that she was able to kind of address that
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: early on because the more I I'm a very committed guy.
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: So the more I actually you know that, the more
• 21:11
  Speaker 1: I the more time goes on, the more business than
• 21:14
  Speaker 1: which go on. I would just do more and more
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: into it and then just the heartbreak is just so
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: much work. Yeah, he's so committed. It's like the greatest
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: thing to see from a guy. Like when he is in,
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: he is all in and he just wants to do
• 21:27
  Speaker 1: everything to make it work. And I think that at
• 21:30
  Speaker 1: some point that could almost be a flaw because like
• 21:33
  Speaker 1: you do get really like into the idea, like this
• 21:35
  Speaker 1: must be success, but like then you just have to
• 21:38
  Speaker 1: step back and be like, what is this the right
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: you know, the right story like that. And it's also
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: different just the way the way our lives work, long
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: distance can work. I don't work before, but I'm also
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: get to a city where I work twenty four our
• 21:54
  Speaker 1: ships and I mean I get months off at a
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: time to do TV shows, but to be able to
• 21:59
  Speaker 1: go to hole to go every weekend back and forth,
• 22:01
  Speaker 1: and it's so hard to do, especially with actually busy lifestyle.
• 22:06
  Speaker 1: That um, we we both just appreciated the fact that
• 22:09
  Speaker 1: we really care about each other. We had we had
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: a great connection. But I just don't think our lives
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: kind of go in the same direction. We have totally
• 22:15
  Speaker 1: different lifestyles and interests, you know, and it's just like, yeah,
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: like I love him being part of my life, but
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: I don't think it's we just we just don't think
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: that they're like our person forever. Kevin, I want to
• 22:28
  Speaker 1: ask you, uh, and I'm gonna ask actually the same question,
• 22:31
  Speaker 1: how ready are you to find that person? I think this, uh,
• 22:35
  Speaker 1: this whole experience, UM, I think it kind of got me,
• 22:40
  Speaker 1: got me over that, over that hunt. The breakup that
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: I went through last year was was pretty rough on
• 22:44
  Speaker 1: the definitely doubted it that I was ready even when
• 22:47
  Speaker 1: we met to Vermont. Similar to to your thoughts and
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: to start them, and I just think, um, I'm definitely ready,
• 22:54
  Speaker 1: Like I'm in that I'm in that point where, um,
• 22:57
  Speaker 1: I'm always moving and I always want to do the
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: next thing. But it's same time, I've had a very
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: good feeling twenties and my thirties are going very well.
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: That I see my two little nieces with my brother
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: and stuff. I'm definitely ready for that. Like that's like
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: number one on my radar. Maybe that's why I might
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: come off a little intense when I'm into somebody. I
• 23:15
  Speaker 1: don't want to say I don't want to say I'm desperate,
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: but I also like I want to have I'm desperately
• 23:19
  Speaker 1: looking for that, Like I love to come home and
• 23:22
  Speaker 1: cook for a woman. I want to have a family,
• 23:24
  Speaker 1: like this is what this is the light that I want.
• 23:26
  Speaker 1: So I'm definitely ready. Ben. I think it's just just
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: got to be patient. He is the ultimate husband material
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: and I still believe this completely, Like I cannot wait
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: for him to find his Like you know that Wilson
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: Phillips song that I never understood. It's like about your
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: ex finding love and happiness. It's like, actually, how I
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: feel about Kevin Lee. I can't wait to see him
• 23:48
  Speaker 1: in that element. But what about you? I mean, actually,
• 23:51
  Speaker 1: then what I mean, what happened? I mean, he's everything
• 23:54
  Speaker 1: you told me. You think he's the best looking guy
• 23:56
  Speaker 1: that walk the face of this there's you know, he's sweet,
• 23:59
  Speaker 1: he's all the husband material. I mean this might not
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: even be on Kevin. Actually, what's going on in your
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: life that kind of doesn't allow you to get to
• 24:06
  Speaker 1: this point? No, I think there's just there, there's and
• 24:10
  Speaker 1: there's the It sounds a little harsh, but it's just
• 24:14
  Speaker 1: that lack of there's magic, there's we get along very well.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: It's just there's a little something missing and you can't
• 24:22
  Speaker 1: really pinpoint what it is. It's just that's about how
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: I feel. I feel like that's normal. And I feel
• 24:26
  Speaker 1: like you get some connections all the time where if
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: you take away our outside world and just put actually
• 24:32
  Speaker 1: me on island together, if we probably get along really well,
• 24:34
  Speaker 1: and that's what Vermont was, um, and then you're adding
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: everything else and interest it can be everyday interest too
• 24:41
  Speaker 1: when we get up in the morning to you know
• 24:43
  Speaker 1: what I mean, like there's there's just life. That two
• 24:46
  Speaker 1: people can go in different kind of direction doesn't mean
• 24:47
  Speaker 1: they don't feel love and respect each other. It just
• 24:50
  Speaker 1: means if it doesn't line up. And the older you get,
• 24:52
  Speaker 1: the quicker you want to identify that. I mean, Kevin,
• 24:55
  Speaker 1: for you when actually gave you the phone call and
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: you guys started the conversation and it was, you know,
• 25:01
  Speaker 1: kind of we we got a little back started out
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: of how the converse taking went at this point in time.
• 25:05
  Speaker 1: Were you feeling the lack of spark also or this
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: kind of a one sided thing? Um? I feel like
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: I was. I was, very like actually said earlier, I
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: got that commitment thing where I just I'm very hard
• 25:16
  Speaker 1: at getting up on things and I'm not saying that
• 25:18
  Speaker 1: we gave up on it and without trying, I'm saying
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: I was still ready to come there again. And I
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: know her birthday, I wanted to be there when I
• 25:26
  Speaker 1: had to work, and I was planning on coming out
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: either that week or she was going to come here,
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: and I knew, I knew we definitely had like an
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: uphill paddle, like I wasn't in yet, but I also
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: knew I wanted to see her again. But now that
• 25:39
  Speaker 1: a few days have passed and we both kind of
• 25:41
  Speaker 1: collected our thoughts and emotions and stuff, I know, I
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: know she made the right call and I know this
• 25:46
  Speaker 1: is the way it should be. And um, I honestly true.
• 25:49
  Speaker 1: And I feel like I got friend zones, actually your
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: friends zones being this time the tables. But I but
• 25:58
  Speaker 1: I'm okay. I think the more processed in, the more
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: I mean, I've kept this kind of to myself. I
• 26:02
  Speaker 1: didn't want any comments getting out there without us doing this,
• 26:06
  Speaker 1: because I know we wanted this to be our platform
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: to kind of talk about it. That I've been to myself,
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: but a few people like my parents or whoever I
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: have talked, I know they just see that I'm a
• 26:14
  Speaker 1: very loving person. I want I want the best things
• 26:17
  Speaker 1: for Actually, I just don't think, Um, the spark was
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: was fully ignited by the time we had the conversations.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: By respect you for these kind of doing it earlier on,
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: we could have done two or three more trips, and
• 26:28
  Speaker 1: then it's just what it kind of dragged us. So
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: it's all good. It makes sense, And I want to
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: address kind of why we decided to talk about this
• 26:34
  Speaker 1: on the podcast. One. Um, I've been like so open
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: and sharing my entire love life with everybody out there
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: for like three years, so when my first breakup happens,
• 26:45
  Speaker 1: I think that it's something that they'll be an there
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: was there is a natural curiosity about and what I
• 26:51
  Speaker 1: wanted to prevent was everybody's interpretations, personal interpretations and like
• 26:58
  Speaker 1: all the social media a part, and I just didn't
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: want people to make assumptions and like to be like, oh,
• 27:06
  Speaker 1: Ashley is the sad girl, like I'm crying for her,
• 27:08
  Speaker 1: like her poor broken heart. And I didn't want people
• 27:11
  Speaker 1: like villainizing him and saying like he did so and
• 27:15
  Speaker 1: so like no, like we just wanted to like kind
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: of get this out there together since we are on
• 27:19
  Speaker 1: such a such friendly terms and be like, no, guys,
• 27:22
  Speaker 1: this is actually how it happened, Like, don't come up
• 27:24
  Speaker 1: with their crazy theories. I mean, you better do this
• 27:27
  Speaker 1: on the podcast. Are you kidding me? We both have
• 27:28
  Speaker 1: taken this podcast would be so mad. I don't know
• 27:35
  Speaker 1: if you give us to anybody else. Now, it's like
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: a nice safe place for us to just talk about it,
• 27:41
  Speaker 1: like you know, civilized people. So I felt like you.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: I felt like we we talked about this, uh a
• 27:46
  Speaker 1: day or two after we had to take conversation and um,
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: rather than it just be something, you know, if one
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: rumor starts of what happened, it can get pretty And
• 27:55
  Speaker 1: this is still a new world to me. I now,
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: you guys have been in for a while. But um,
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Actley is pretty open with all of her fans and
• 28:01
  Speaker 1: and people watch the show get invested in our relationship.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: So at the end of the day, we respect the
• 28:06
  Speaker 1: process of what we signed up for, and we respect
• 28:08
  Speaker 1: that if I was following somebody that I really just
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: kind of rooting for, we don't owe them an explanation,
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: but the time we appreciate that they should get one
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: so good it makes sense. It makes complete sense. Kevin
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: I know you gotta go here. You're busy guy. You
• 28:23
  Speaker 1: got to get back to us saving the world and
• 28:25
  Speaker 1: fighting buyers in Canada. I mean, what an attractive job.
• 28:28
  Speaker 1: You know you've already talked about enough. Actually, we know
• 28:32
  Speaker 1: you love Kevin. We we we've got to hear your reasoning.
• 28:36
  Speaker 1: We've got to hear your heart. And is there anything here, um,
• 28:40
  Speaker 1: to kind of close out this segment with you that
• 28:42
  Speaker 1: you would want to say to actually uh, just for
• 28:45
  Speaker 1: the listeners to hear, uh, so they know exactly what
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: you think of this beautiful young lady we all love.
• 28:53
  Speaker 1: The only thing I really got to say now that
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: I'm I have a whole um, I kind of have
• 28:58
  Speaker 1: my own vision of her now because I didn't I
• 29:01
  Speaker 1: didn't see her in past seasons of the show. I
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: didn't know her reputation at the moment, I just met
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: her very orchanically, you know. Um, I got to know
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: each other with no outside attractions, and then getting to
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: kind of see her in her everyday life. I realized
• 29:14
  Speaker 1: she's gonna be a wonderful wife and mother and whenever
• 29:17
  Speaker 1: she is ready, they'll be a line up down the
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: block for her. UM. And I know that she's gonna
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: be gotta be like probably her favorite part of her
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: whole life. And I know she she comes from a
• 29:27
  Speaker 1: great family and they're just I'm going to be jealous
• 29:31
  Speaker 1: already of whatever guy ends up with it. So I
• 29:32
  Speaker 1: know how great she is and I'm just happy to
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: have met her. I'm happy that we kind of went
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: through this together because I think if if aither of
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: us weren't there for this experience, we might have both
• 29:44
  Speaker 1: had maybe a negative experience. I think we kind of
• 29:46
  Speaker 1: helped each other through the whole thing right up until
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: I flew home, you know, a couple of weeks ago. Um,
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: it was all positive and I think that's the one
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: great thing, and that's the reason why I loved this
• 29:56
  Speaker 1: whole I love this. I know you guys are both
• 29:58
  Speaker 1: fans of the two, but I loved this whole process
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: of like human interactions because I got to know Ashley
• 30:04
  Speaker 1: without even knowing one comment agother. I just got to
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: get to know her as a person and then build
• 30:10
  Speaker 1: from that. And it didn't work at this time, and um,
• 30:13
  Speaker 1: I just know she is going to blow some guys
• 30:16
  Speaker 1: plots off one day and just be more a way
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: for the century. Kevin went we love you, We respect you.
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: I think incredibly highly of you. Thank you for being
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: a great guy to my friend. Thank you for showing
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: men out there how to treat a woman. Kevin, we
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: wish you not only the best from this podcast, but
• 30:37
  Speaker 1: as friends of yours, we are completely rooting for you. Actually,
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: I know you agree? Do you agree? And I'm glad
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: that you guys even got to hear him today because
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: I think it's further proof that he is just like
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: such a catch. Thank you, guys from almost podcast. Keep
• 30:57
  Speaker 1: being Hot? Yea by that was cathartic. How that feel?
• 31:06
  Speaker 1: I feel good? It felt good. I'm glad that we
• 31:08
  Speaker 1: did that. I think it's a It was a perfect
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: demonstration of how we really feel towards each other. I mean, actually,
• 31:14
  Speaker 1: I'm sitting here and it's still weird for me to
• 31:17
  Speaker 1: think that you're even in a relationship after Winter Games, honestly,
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: because who would have thought that Winter Games would have
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: led either of us to actually like being in a relationship.
• 31:25
  Speaker 1: But but you met somebody that you were so excited for,
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: that you're so excited about. I want to know from
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: you personally. I know that when Kevin first started to
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: show interesting you, it was a good confidence booster for you.
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: And one thing I've seen and you could tell me
• 31:39
  Speaker 1: if I'm completely wrong. Listeners, I want you to tell
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: me if I'm completely wrong. You do a pretty good
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: job of that. Anyway. Um, since you've met Kevin, you've
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: stood you have you haven't owned your identity as the
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: emotional kind of uh friend zoned person that maybe you
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: you had before. You've tried to change your You spoke
• 32:00
  Speaker 1: against maybe your emotions. He spoke against always being friend zoned.
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: You've almost became this new Ashley, and I want to
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: know where that comes from, because even in the conversation
• 32:09
  Speaker 1: with Kevin, I hear you trying to defend who you
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: are now compared to who you are before. Really well,
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: I do think that our relationship was like this. I
• 32:22
  Speaker 1: don't want it's like a stepping stone, which is maybe
• 32:24
  Speaker 1: a weird term, but for both of us, Like I
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: think he needed to find someone to get him out
• 32:30
  Speaker 1: there because he was you know, he wasn't as he
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: was pretty torn up still about the breaking off of
• 32:36
  Speaker 1: his engagement. And Okay, so I guess I came around
• 32:39
  Speaker 1: like eight months after that, and he had not really
• 32:42
  Speaker 1: dated or invested emotionally in anyone until me, and he
• 32:47
  Speaker 1: needed me to kind of like get himself back out
• 32:50
  Speaker 1: there and to just let himself feel for somebody again.
• 32:54
  Speaker 1: And then for me, I guess I needed to find
• 32:57
  Speaker 1: someone he was gonna make me feel really valued, cherished, um, sexy,
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: just and make me feel like a catch. Not that
• 33:09
  Speaker 1: I've always thought I was a catch. Like I've never
• 33:11
  Speaker 1: been that girl who's like, nobody likes me, Like why
• 33:14
  Speaker 1: what's wrong? I've never been the girl who says, what's
• 33:16
  Speaker 1: wrong with me? Um? I mean, I don't think I've
• 33:19
  Speaker 1: ever even said that on the show. I've always been
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: the girl who's like, why doesn't he like me? Like
• 33:24
  Speaker 1: what is it about him that doesn't like me? So
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: I've always had more confidence that I feel like people
• 33:30
  Speaker 1: think that I that I have UM. But it it
• 33:34
  Speaker 1: does give me a nice sense of security to be like,
• 33:36
  Speaker 1: oh no, this guy like he thinks I'm all that
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: UM and that kind of confirms for me that I am.
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: I mean, we all think you are. And and it
• 33:47
  Speaker 1: sounds like your emotional health is impact and we can
• 33:51
  Speaker 1: tell that you're doing okay, But let's talk about your
• 33:54
  Speaker 1: physical health health for a second. And I want to
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: talk about it by introducing you to quit when it
• 33:59
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• 34:01
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• 34:15
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• 34:18
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• 34:23
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• 34:25
  Speaker 1: brush you with Doug clip and I'm laughing because you
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: know it does it alert you when you should switch
• 34:31
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• 34:33
  Speaker 1: able to brush without that. I'm I'm honestly like I
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: think I I've gotten so used to be in triggered
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: of okay, kind of hit the left side. Um anyway.
• 34:44
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• 34:47
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• 34:50
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• 34:57
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• 35:49
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• 35:52
  Speaker 1: need it. Actually getting back now from your physical health
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: back to your emotional health. Actually we have you have these,
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: you're friends with, you have people in your life that
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: you care a lot about. When are you gonna be ready?
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: Do you know if you're gonna be ready again for
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: any type of romantic connection or romantic relationship or is
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: this going to take time. I think I'll take a
• 36:12
  Speaker 1: little bit of time off, but I don't think I
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: have a big recovery period I have to go through.
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: So I mean, if if the right guy, if Prince
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: Charming or whoever, Terry Bradshaw that's her name, right, carry Bradshaw,
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: not Terry Bradshaw, Terry bradwa if I remember, if you're
• 36:32
  Speaker 1: Mr Big walked into a room right, is that I Yes,
• 36:35
  Speaker 1: guys are doing great jobs. Okay, if you're Mr Big
• 36:38
  Speaker 1: walked into a room right now, you know you would
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: be ready to at least it down and have a conversation,
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: and you feel like you're still open for the possibility
• 36:46
  Speaker 1: of finding somebody right now you're you're keeled enough or
• 36:49
  Speaker 1: you're recovered enough for that. I feel like, yes, awesome. Actually,
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: one thing selfishly that I could not tell you until now,
• 36:59
  Speaker 1: because now you're back to being single, Welcome to the club.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: I recognize that I wasn't getting um as many questions
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: from you on advice recently, and I wonder if any
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: of that has to do on the podcast and outside
• 37:14
  Speaker 1: of the podcast. I wonder if any of that has
• 37:16
  Speaker 1: to do with the fact that Kevin was in your
• 37:17
  Speaker 1: life maybe, but now you're back to leaning on the
• 37:22
  Speaker 1: almost famous podcast and your uh well, speaking of Dr
• 37:30
  Speaker 1: ben Um, we also have our other favorite doctor, Dr
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: Nick Le in the in the hot seat right now. Um.
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: Nick's going to come on here in a second. Uh.
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: Nick and I are going to talk about breakups with
• 37:41
  Speaker 1: Ashley who We're gonna talk about how we recover from breakup,
• 37:45
  Speaker 1: how we recommend you recover from breakfast breakup. We're gonna
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: reach out to you again for advice. Um. Anybody out
• 37:51
  Speaker 1: there that that has any advice on how to recover
• 37:53
  Speaker 1: from a breakup or or any of their crazy breakup stories,
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: please email us. I've been in actley I media dot com.
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: We're like ford to hearing from you, and we'll read
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: or try to read your emails on this podcast before
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: we talk to Nick. You know what's just as much
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: fun as Nick? Shopping? I went to the mall the
• 38:13
  Speaker 1: other day, though, and it wasn't that much fun because
• 38:15
  Speaker 1: I couldn't find anything. I wasted two hours of my
• 38:18
  Speaker 1: day and I couldn't even find when I was looking for.
• 38:20
  Speaker 1: It was so frustrating. I was just looking for a
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: basic sweater. Does that even exist anymore. My options were
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: like super low v next or really expensive unflattering sweaters.
• 38:30
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• 38:32
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• 38:36
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• 38:39
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• 38:47
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• 38:49
  Speaker 1: something new to wear. It's so easy. It's better clothes
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: than I would ever find shopping at the mall, and
• 38:54
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• 38:56
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• 38:59
  Speaker 1: to get started. Enter promo code almost famous at checkout
• 39:02
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• 39:05
  Speaker 1: get a completely customized tote within days, wear it all
• 39:08
  Speaker 1: and when you're done, return the rest of it in
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: the mail and they'll start preparing your next toe immediately. Again.
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: That is litto dot com and our code is almost
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: famous and you'll always have something new to wear. It's amazing.
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: We have one of our favorite bachelors in studio right now.
• 39:25
  Speaker 1: This guy, Uh, you know, I just want to be
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: clear and what you all don't see and here on
• 39:31
  Speaker 1: this podcast or on the show is Nick has been
• 39:34
  Speaker 1: very supportive to me through my relational struggles. Uh. He
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: also is one of the people that has the most
• 39:40
  Speaker 1: respect for his breakup. He holds it very close to
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: his chest. He has a lot of respect for his
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: uh former relationships. So we thought nobody else that has
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: more respect for his partners to come in and talk
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: respectively about breakups and also give an advice on how
• 39:56
  Speaker 1: you handle breakups. Then one of our favorite Nick file
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: Nick over to the podcast, What's Up Ben? What's up? Dude? Hey?
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: You know, obviously this podcast feels a little different today.
• 40:07
  Speaker 1: I mean, how often do you have a couple that
• 40:10
  Speaker 1: has recently broke up, actually within the last week come
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: on and talk to each other. I mean, that's that's unique,
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: that's different, But it just shows kind of the character
• 40:19
  Speaker 1: that actually Kevin hold Nick. I've I've noticed just from
• 40:22
  Speaker 1: conversation with you, you have a lot of respect for
• 40:25
  Speaker 1: your past relationships and that you you have a certain
• 40:28
  Speaker 1: way that you kind of manage and handle these breakups publicly.
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: Can you talk us about that? Uh? Yeah, I mean
• 40:35
  Speaker 1: I've always been a big believer in terms of relationships
• 40:39
  Speaker 1: I've had in my life, rather romantically or otherwise, that
• 40:42
  Speaker 1: they kind of helped form you as a person. UM.
• 40:46
  Speaker 1: So all of my exes I think have benefited me
• 40:50
  Speaker 1: in some way or another. UM and comment, it's like
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: all a part of the path to your person. Sure, mean,
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: I think being our persons is that it's it's a
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: NonStop evolution. I don't think we ever hopefully we never
• 41:08
  Speaker 1: peek um in terms of who we are as people
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: that can always change. UM. And so it's there's just
• 41:15
  Speaker 1: no real reason to speak negatively about people, UM who
• 41:19
  Speaker 1: have had a a part of who are part of
• 41:23
  Speaker 1: your past. Um. You know, and any serious laship I've
• 41:27
  Speaker 1: been on, I've felt love and I felt love for
• 41:31
  Speaker 1: that person. I felt loved by that person, and so
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: those are those are special moments that even though it
• 41:36
  Speaker 1: doesn't work out, you kind of hold near and dear
• 41:38
  Speaker 1: to your heart. So, you know, I just try to
• 41:41
  Speaker 1: always remember that I and I think that's something that
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: I really admire and look up to you because you're
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: you always do give that content reminder as well as
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: actually just did at her with her conversation with Kevin
• 41:52
  Speaker 1: and Kevin Vice versa is you know you hold these
• 41:55
  Speaker 1: people uh a pot no matter if there's been pain
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: involved or not, you hold them a high because of
• 42:00
  Speaker 1: the impact that they've had in your life and the
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: fact that you did share life with them for a
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: little bit. UM, let's let's go from our personal lives
• 42:07
  Speaker 1: here for a second to get very bachelor esque on everybody.
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: I know this isn't always our favorite thing to do, UM,
• 42:14
  Speaker 1: but it makes sense because a lot of the people
• 42:16
  Speaker 1: listen to this podcast have gotten to know you and
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: Ashley and I threw um the Bachelor nick as you
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: entered into being the back TWI what kind of advice
• 42:27
  Speaker 1: were you given that you feel like, well, it's helpful
• 42:29
  Speaker 1: for you to at least meet Vanessa UM, not necessarily
• 42:33
  Speaker 1: leading to the the end of that relationship, but at
• 42:35
  Speaker 1: least going on the right track to finding I feel
• 42:39
  Speaker 1: like you're setting yourself up for success. Ben. I think
• 42:42
  Speaker 1: I think you know the answer to this question. I mean,
• 42:44
  Speaker 1: the best advice I got was from you and your
• 42:47
  Speaker 1: ex Lauren. UM. Honestly, I mean, I think I think
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: that's fair. That's great if it really was that, But
• 42:54
  Speaker 1: don't just say that because I really had I've said
• 42:56
  Speaker 1: that's another interview since this isn't groundbreaking news here. But UM, yeah,
• 43:01
  Speaker 1: I mean I'm sure you remember shortly after I was
• 43:04
  Speaker 1: announced that I had dinner with the two of you, um,
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: as well as Lauren's brother was there. Delightful young man. UM.
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: And you know there you guys were pretty candid with
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: your advice and the advice I got. UM, and I
• 43:20
  Speaker 1: think you supported. This was Lauren talking about you know
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: you kind of I kind of suspected this, and you know,
• 43:27
  Speaker 1: as to thirty, you know, women will come out a limo.
• 43:31
  Speaker 1: You're bound to make real connections with a handful of
• 43:35
  Speaker 1: those people. And UM, you know, Lauren said to me, hey, listen,
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: you're going to develop feelings. But if you have any
• 43:41
  Speaker 1: inclination of who you might pick, especially if it's early on,
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: and again you might you might have an inclination of
• 43:47
  Speaker 1: who the person could be, that can change. You're always you.
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: You try to your best to keep your heart open.
• 43:52
  Speaker 1: But she said, if you're gonna do that, be mindful
• 43:55
  Speaker 1: and go out of your way to protect that relationship, um,
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: because you won't always be able to use the excuse
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: while I was the bachelor. UM, So I really took
• 44:06
  Speaker 1: that to heart, and UM, I took that to heart
• 44:09
  Speaker 1: all the way from night one to the very end,
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: and it was very helpful for me and something that UM,
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: I went way out of my way to do. Yeah. Again, unfortunately,
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: our relationship didn't work out, and is is challenge as
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: much as I tried, um to do that, and I
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: felt like I successfully did that and was in a
• 44:26
  Speaker 1: lot of ways proud of of how I did it. Um.
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: That world is very difficult and and brings a lot
• 44:31
  Speaker 1: of challenges regardless, UM. You know, it's it's everyone's experience
• 44:37
  Speaker 1: in that world is different, UM, and it's just a
• 44:39
  Speaker 1: matter of perspective. But that was probably the best, you know,
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: real advice that I actually you know, you get advice
• 44:46
  Speaker 1: and you're like, yeah, great, that's and that most of
• 44:47
  Speaker 1: your advice is generic, like follow your heart and you know,
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: don't overthink things, like a lot of people tell me
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: that because they know I tend to be an analytical person.
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: But that that was specific advice, and I think I
• 44:57
  Speaker 1: know that you kind of echoed that, and I think
• 45:00
  Speaker 1: I remember you saying you had wished you had heard
• 45:02
  Speaker 1: that advice as well, not that you didn't. And everyone
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: knows you're a very respectful person. But in that world
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: you can kind of get caught up in things and
• 45:08
  Speaker 1: you're you know, this is a bachelor. There's this constant
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: struggle of UM, regardless of how you're feeling. Um, if
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: you have really strong feelings for one person, there are
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: other feelings you have for other people, and those feelings
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: can get confusing. Um. Every day is a new day
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: with a different girl, and you can go on a
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: date and have this really great time and feel you
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: make of this connection and then you have to force
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: yourself to press the reset button. That can be challenging
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: and confusing, and every lead bachelor bachelotte otherwise has faced
• 45:38
  Speaker 1: those challenges and so UM, having heard that advice, it
• 45:42
  Speaker 1: just really made me prioritize and really focus on the
• 45:46
  Speaker 1: things that mattered most to me. And UM, that was
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: probably the most helpful and from it helpful advice I
• 45:52
  Speaker 1: ever ever got. Yeah, I mean I think that they come.
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: I mean when when that advice was given, I I
• 45:58
  Speaker 1: can sit back and remember that it was at the yardhouse,
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: right there by the God of you Marry, right downtown
• 46:03
  Speaker 1: l A. And I mean it was really coming from
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: a place that Laura and I at that time, I
• 46:07
  Speaker 1: really loved and cared about each other and we're trying
• 46:09
  Speaker 1: to make it work. And we realized the things that
• 46:11
  Speaker 1: I had done as the Bachelor, that we're playing a
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: huge role in the success and lack of success of
• 46:18
  Speaker 1: our relationship outside of the show. And so I think
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: it is incredibly important to lean on anybody in the
• 46:24
  Speaker 1: past that has participated in the show. And before I
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: bring up a specific thing that I that I came across,
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: um hey to interrupt, but one other the second best
• 46:33
  Speaker 1: advice I got was also from you, and you said, uh,
• 46:37
  Speaker 1: and obviously interestingly enough, it might apply to this currency,
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: but you said, if you're not certain, don't propose, don't
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: get engaged. And I think that made you know again
• 46:47
  Speaker 1: you're always taking a leap of faith in that world.
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: But um, I remember thinking about that towards the end
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: and really questioning my feelings. But you know, I felt
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: so strongly for Vanessa at the time that um, you know,
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: I've I've felt very confident in my decision to take it.
• 47:01
  Speaker 1: It wasn't just um based off the expectations of batanition
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: or the show or producers. And so that was just
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: again another piod of advice you gave me. That is
• 47:11
  Speaker 1: something that I took to heart and considered throughout the process.
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: I wonder if Ari, if we if we had him monitor,
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: he would have felt, you know, that advice was good
• 47:22
  Speaker 1: advice at this point, if he would have wished he
• 47:24
  Speaker 1: would have kind of waited in processes out, or if
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: he had anybody in his corner kind of telling him, hey,
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: it is okay, this is your love story, this is
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: your experience, like we're just here to watch it. I
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: wonder if anybody had told him, you know, do you
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: find or need or think is best? And if you're
• 47:41
  Speaker 1: not certain by it, no means do you need to
• 47:44
  Speaker 1: get down on one knee. That's not why this show exists.
• 47:46
  Speaker 1: The show exists the fine love and if you need
• 47:49
  Speaker 1: a little bit longer, that's okay. Yeah, it's very interesting
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: that you know Ari season just because you know there's
• 47:57
  Speaker 1: there's a lot of choices he made that I think
• 48:00
  Speaker 1: you and I've discussed offline that I can't necessarily agree
• 48:03
  Speaker 1: with or don't understand, but it already certainly kind of
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: did his thing. And what I mean by that is,
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: you know, as a former bachelor, um, you kind of
• 48:13
  Speaker 1: know the advice you get from producers, and they do
• 48:15
  Speaker 1: try to give you good advice. You know, sometimes it
• 48:18
  Speaker 1: doesn't always feel that way, but they really do. Um,
• 48:22
  Speaker 1: it seemed like a he was really kind of going
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: by his own beat, so to speak. Interesting enough, It's like,
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: if that was the case, why did he propose in
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: a sense, because if it was, he certainly did things
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: that no one could no one could, like objectively think
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: if he was worried about what Bachelor Nation would think
• 48:38
  Speaker 1: of him, He's certainly knew he was gonna get criticized.
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: So if it was just a fear of of that,
• 48:44
  Speaker 1: why not just wait and and not propose? And you know, again, people,
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: you know Bom Pablo got criticized for that. You know what,
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: Walmac got criticized for that, but are he didn't seem
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: to care about that, so which good for him. Um,
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: But then why not why I proposed that? That was
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: kind of an odd It didn't quite make sense, but
• 49:05
  Speaker 1: you know, it certainly made it for good TV. I
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: mean actually, and I got to speak with Ari happily
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: through the season and I get to learn a lot
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: about him. But I did not talk to him before
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: his season started. I didn't talk to him after he
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: got announced the Bachelor. Did and I don't know this
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: actually did you talk to him before his season started?
• 49:21
  Speaker 1: Did you share advice to him? I met, I met
• 49:24
  Speaker 1: Ari for the first time right before the season premiered,
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: not before filming. UM reached out to you. No, never
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: reached out to me. Um. I met him. He asked
• 49:35
  Speaker 1: for advice, Uh, you know at that point, And interesting enough,
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: it seems like he was struggling with his choice at
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: that point. He didn't really elaborate that to me at
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: the time, and I actually said to him. What also
• 49:47
  Speaker 1: I did hear from you, which ended up being true,
• 49:51
  Speaker 1: was that as hard it is, as hard as it
• 49:53
  Speaker 1: is to be the Bachelor and film and goes for
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: this season and film the season, and as stressful as
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: it is, and that lack of sweep sleep, it is
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: either equally or if not harder UM post filming while
• 50:06
  Speaker 1: the show is airing, especially in terms of UM preserving
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: the relation, the new relationship and and the struggles that
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: are gonna come with it. And I remember thinking to myself,
• 50:18
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm sure that's true when you told me that.
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: But again I knew what I did. I knew what
• 50:22
  Speaker 1: I didn't do. And I felt like I set myself
• 50:24
  Speaker 1: up in my relationship with Vanessa up for success as
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: much as I possibly could have. And yet it's just
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: such a challenge, UM, because you know, it's you don't
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: know what you know, Vanessa or Lauren are going to
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: go through, and they're all entitled to have, you know,
• 50:41
  Speaker 1: these feelings, UM as a result to go through it.
• 50:44
  Speaker 1: It takes a toll on on the winner, UM, because
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: they have to they have to tell themselves they need
• 50:52
  Speaker 1: to be okay with things that they would never otherwise
• 50:54
  Speaker 1: be okay with UM and that and we're not you know,
• 50:57
  Speaker 1: just we're not even talking about stuff that goes on
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: a fancy suite, just the whole process, UM. And so
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: it's a it's a real challenge. And so I kind
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: of echoed that to ari Um and said, you know,
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: like just you know, be prepared. It's a challenge in
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: not realizing he was even struggling with his decision, and
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: it's s turned out to be obviously even more of
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: a situation for him than I could have anticipated. I mean,
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: if I would love to hear two years opinion, that's
• 51:25
  Speaker 1: the two of you's opinions, UM, that's why I'm so
• 51:29
  Speaker 1: impressed confused by by Lauren um Burnham and and Ari.
• 51:35
  Speaker 1: I mean she stuck by his side, and I mean
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: I saw I tried to. I mean I obviously made
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: some really big mistakes. Uh, and I did some things
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: that definitely didn't set it up for success, Like you didn't.
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: You definitely did it, And I know that you worked
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: really hard at setting this thing up for success. Um.
• 51:50
  Speaker 1: I tried, but I definitely felt short of what you did, Um, Ari,
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: So I think even farther short of me. But yet,
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: you know, he has this woman sitting next to him
• 51:59
  Speaker 1: at the very end in the finale, and she is
• 52:02
  Speaker 1: just as supportive as possible him and it, and it
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: looks like they are are past the most difficult part.
• 52:07
  Speaker 1: And that surprised me, like because all you know, I
• 52:11
  Speaker 1: I didn't see that side of the show. I mean,
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: the show was really hard on my relationship. Yeah you know,
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: UM said. You know again, it's interesting because Um, I've
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: heard the criticism, UM, and the criticism off does seem fair.
• 52:26
  Speaker 1: But again, when it comes to Arise choices, I don't
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: agree with a lot of how he handled things. UM. However, Um,
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: having been in that world, I'm sure, Ben, you would
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: agree with this. Um, there's no denying that he risked
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: a lot to do what he did, regardless of you
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: agree with how he did it or even the fact
• 52:46
  Speaker 1: that he did it. But if he was lukewarm on
• 52:49
  Speaker 1: Lauren or just kind of liked her more, it wouldn't
• 52:53
  Speaker 1: make much sense for him to do what he did.
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: He clearly, I mean, there's I don't know how otherwise
• 52:57
  Speaker 1: he could really realized at and maybe he had to
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: go about this is in this weird manner, UM realized
• 53:05
  Speaker 1: that how strongly he must have felt for Lauren, because otherwise,
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: why don't like just ride it out with Becca and
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: try to make it work. He clearly risked a lot
• 53:15
  Speaker 1: in terms of public humiliation and criticism, UM, for the
• 53:20
  Speaker 1: chance that are Lauren or with Lauren, And so I
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: don't know if they're gonna work out, UM, but I
• 53:27
  Speaker 1: thought it was a very interesting comment UM on Tuesday
• 53:30
  Speaker 1: night when Molly mentioned that if she wonders if her
• 53:34
  Speaker 1: and Jason would have worked out had he not um
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: first broke up with her and got engaged to the
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: other woman. UM first, because it's interesting, I wonder if
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: it was Lauren being so supportive. I feel like a
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: good good credit to her that UM when you when again,
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: I don't know what it's like to win UM or
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: or be picked. You know how what Lauren and Vanessa
• 53:59
  Speaker 1: had to go through UM, and there's some struggles there.
• 54:03
  Speaker 1: But Lauren, Lauren got broken up with by Ari and
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: then had that feel that heartbreak and then she clearly
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: loved Lauren Ari rather UM. And once Ari came back.
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: You can say what you want, but I think she
• 54:19
  Speaker 1: decided to say, listen, I love this guy, and I'm
• 54:22
  Speaker 1: just going to focus on the positive and that is
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: that I get to be with the man I love
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: and all the other stuff I'm just going to I
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: can't change it, and someone to focus what I have.
• 54:32
  Speaker 1: And you've got to give Lauren a lot of credit
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: because and again this is not to criticize it your
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: Lauren or my Vanessa or your Lauren I say that,
• 54:39
  Speaker 1: or Vanessa, but UM, it is a struggle to to
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: accept the things that happened while going through filming. And
• 54:48
  Speaker 1: I think the winner constantly kind of struggles with that
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: and it becomes an an ongoing discussion and there's so
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: many crappy conversations you have to have on our stresses,
• 54:58
  Speaker 1: and I feel like Lauren almost kind of alleviated herself
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: from like worrying about what ultimately is petty things. And
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: I think every couple agrees that they end up fighting about,
• 55:08
  Speaker 1: you know, things that really have nothing to do with
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: the relationship. And in some way, I feel like it
• 55:12
  Speaker 1: almost is going to benefit them in that way that
• 55:16
  Speaker 1: they can get through. Yeah, And I feel like, and
• 55:18
  Speaker 1: again that might change, you know, four months, five months
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: from now, things can die down and everyone's different. You know,
• 55:24
  Speaker 1: Lauren might have the personality where she doesn't care about
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: that stuff and good for her, and it doesn't make
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: and the personality is better. It takes us. It takes
• 55:31
  Speaker 1: a lot of luck and Bachelor World and a certain
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: kind of relationship to get through some of the incredible
• 55:38
  Speaker 1: stresses that couples have to face that no other couples
• 55:41
  Speaker 1: otherwise would have to. I mean asked, I want to
• 55:44
  Speaker 1: ask you. I mean, do you feel like your relationship
• 55:47
  Speaker 1: with Kevin do you feel like you've felt the pressure
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: that a normal bachelor or Bachelor at couple felt after
• 55:54
  Speaker 1: getting off the show or was Winter Games? Was that
• 55:57
  Speaker 1: a different kind of experience for you? Um? I think
• 56:00
  Speaker 1: the pressure I felt the most was that my doubts
• 56:03
  Speaker 1: about the relationship naturally started happening around that two month point,
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: which in this world, that's when it's almost this is
• 56:11
  Speaker 1: like kind of when it's starting to air. So I
• 56:13
  Speaker 1: think you're really starting to find out a lot about
• 56:15
  Speaker 1: the person and how your life would be like in
• 56:18
  Speaker 1: regular life outside the bubble with the person, right around
• 56:21
  Speaker 1: the time that the show starts airing. And that's a
• 56:24
  Speaker 1: lot of pressure because the fans want to see the
• 56:26
  Speaker 1: happy ending continue in the real world, and um, it's
• 56:30
  Speaker 1: just kind of like if you guys think about, you know,
• 56:32
  Speaker 1: out there in the real world, think about dating somebody
• 56:36
  Speaker 1: for a little bit, and then at that two month point,
• 56:38
  Speaker 1: you're really like, Okay, I'm starting to either see this
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: person as a long term partner or this is just
• 56:43
  Speaker 1: like a short term stepping stone. And I think for
• 56:47
  Speaker 1: us that the timing is hard because there is so
• 56:49
  Speaker 1: much fan pressure to have that happy ending, especially with
• 56:53
  Speaker 1: that after the final Rows reunion shows all that, you know, Uh,
• 56:58
  Speaker 1: it brings up a good point here as we're preparing
• 57:00
  Speaker 1: for this podcast. As I said, I came across something
• 57:03
  Speaker 1: here trying to figure out where are he got his
• 57:06
  Speaker 1: advice I mean, if he didn't get it from Nick,
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: are you didn't get it from me and you didn't
• 57:10
  Speaker 1: get it from Crystals and who am the because he
• 57:13
  Speaker 1: get his advice from it. It was pretty clear on
• 57:14
  Speaker 1: the first episode of this season that he was gonna
• 57:17
  Speaker 1: lean on one of America's favorite and former Bachelor, Sean Lowe.
• 57:22
  Speaker 1: Uh And I found this quote from Sean Lowe uh
• 57:28
  Speaker 1: preparing for this and it says Sean Lowe says that
• 57:31
  Speaker 1: every Bachelor has called him after the Bachelor finale for advice.
• 57:36
  Speaker 1: Sean also adds that not one bachelor has fully taken
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: his advice. I don't think I called him either. I
• 57:48
  Speaker 1: think more he showed up to both of your premieres. Though.
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: How does that feel to like have these guys being like,
• 57:54
  Speaker 1: I know what I'm doing? Well? It was interesting because
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: you know that always happens, right, you know that usually
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: they they do that every season. And I remember going
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: to producers, I'm like, I bet you guys were gonna
• 58:05
  Speaker 1: do this, right, They're like, yeah, we're gonna do this,
• 58:08
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, great, I would love to see Chris
• 58:11
  Speaker 1: and Ben. Don't invite Sean. Um, I'll just put it
• 58:15
  Speaker 1: out there. Um. And I bet I made a bet
• 58:17
  Speaker 1: to the producers. I said, I bet you a million
• 58:20
  Speaker 1: dollars that Sean gives me no advice, but he goes
• 58:23
  Speaker 1: out of his way to remind everyone that's not. Everyone
• 58:29
  Speaker 1: loves me, you know. He and he did. He like
• 58:31
  Speaker 1: I think they aired it. He's like, well, I like you,
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: but you know not everyone in bet You Nation is
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: your biggest fan. I'm like, thank you for reminding me.
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: Uh yeah, things, And it was just like, I I
• 58:44
  Speaker 1: think I want a actual hundred bucks from my producer. Um,
• 58:49
  Speaker 1: so I know it wasn't planted, but um, yeah, yeah
• 58:53
  Speaker 1: I didn't. I did not ask for his advice, certainly
• 58:57
  Speaker 1: post show. I don't know advice I didn't take from him.
• 59:00
  Speaker 1: But I'm glad it's working out. I mean that. Yeah,
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure, I'm sure we're all but we
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: don't want any anything bad about this. But it's I
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: took a fense to this comment. Um, personally I did.
• 59:11
  Speaker 1: It's a little annoying to hear. I'll agree. Yeah, it
• 59:14
  Speaker 1: doesn't easy with me to have somebody sitting there. I mean, Nick,
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: if you were to sit there and go, yeah, you know,
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: I knew what Benn should have done. He just didn't
• 59:22
  Speaker 1: listen to me. I mean, I'm sorry, but nobody, even
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: my closest friends and my family, knows the full picture
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: of what happened in my relationship that made it not
• 59:32
  Speaker 1: work out, or nobody knows what Lauren and I did
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: to try to make it work out exactly what I'm
• 59:37
  Speaker 1: reading this, and it hurts. It did, it doesn't, It
• 59:40
  Speaker 1: doesn't hurt. I mean, it's just I guess it's annoying.
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: I mean, let's be real what it is. It's a
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: it's a really presumptuous, presumptuous and fairly arrogant um to say. So,
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: what do you think do you think Are he took
• 59:54
  Speaker 1: his advice? Do you think Are was leaning on him
• 59:57
  Speaker 1: for advice? I don't know. I don't know are Ari
• 1:00:01
  Speaker 1: and Ari was on the podcast and he said that
• 1:00:05
  Speaker 1: he talked to I mean, Ari was on the podcast,
• 1:00:08
  Speaker 1: he said, But but Sean was on the podcast when
• 1:00:11
  Speaker 1: you weren't here, and he said he did not ask
• 1:00:15
  Speaker 1: him advice about specifically the switchero because Sean had no
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: idea that what Cheru was coming. Sure, I mean, it's
• 1:00:21
  Speaker 1: I know, for example, like Sean has been it's again
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 1: every situation as different as you say, Ben UM. Sean
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 1: has been UM ever since he was on it, UM
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: very outspoken about his experience on Dancing with the Stars
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 1: UM and the challenges it brought to their relationship. Interestingly enough,
• 1:00:40
  Speaker 1: Sean and I had the same partner. I've heard stories, UM,
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 1: and that's not to say, you know, again, every relationship
• 1:00:47
  Speaker 1: is different. UM. For all the challenges that Vanessa and
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 1: I had UM our experience post filming the show itself,
• 1:00:57
  Speaker 1: Bachelor was probably the most toxic part. And that's not
• 1:01:01
  Speaker 1: to blame the show, it's just that's this inevitable. In fact,
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 1: dancing for us was a huge lift for us. UM.
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: The challenges that Sean and Catherine I had from dancing
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 1: we didn't have. Vanessa was awesome in terms of being
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 1: supportive on dancing. I think for both of us it
• 1:01:21
  Speaker 1: was a really great new break UM from Bachelor World.
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: And it was you know, Vanessa had been willing to
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: come out to l A and we moved in together,
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 1: and so she made a lot of friends on dancing
• 1:01:35
  Speaker 1: UM and it was just incredibly great experience and it
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: really gave us a nice little boost. Now again, that
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: doesn't make us right or wrong. But it's sometimes frustrating
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: to hear because, um it, it wasn't a positive experience
• 1:01:49
  Speaker 1: for Sean to just assume that it will never be
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: for otherwise. And then again, it's very easy to be like, well,
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 1: well Nick did Dancing with the Stars and Vanessa and
• 1:01:58
  Speaker 1: Nick broke up, and apparently Vanessa didn't pray to God
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 1: as much as Sean and Catherine did. Um. You know,
• 1:02:04
  Speaker 1: I'm you know, you're a very religious person. Then I
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: grew up very religious and still have a strong faith,
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 1: but I don't maybe talk about it as much. Um,
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: so that can be frustrating. Um sometimes, because I think
• 1:02:16
  Speaker 1: you know, Ben and I have talked about this. I'm
• 1:02:19
  Speaker 1: incredibly envious and jealous of how lucky Sean and Catherine
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 1: have been. And that's awesome that they have worked out,
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 1: and you know, and I'm sure I think I've heard
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 1: Sean I mentioned how lucky is that Katherine showed up,
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: and I'm glad him, glad to see him say that,
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: because um, they're there. It takes a lot of luck.
• 1:02:39
  Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's not easy, and it's really cool
• 1:02:42
  Speaker 1: that they've been able to work out, and sometimes it's
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 1: a little frustrating. Um, two. Uh to hear that person
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: um act like they just did it better than everyone else.
• 1:02:54
  Speaker 1: I don't know, but I mean, you know, I think
• 1:02:56
  Speaker 1: you're on I think that's what I mean. I know, Um,
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 1: I mean I know my personal experience, like we fought,
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 1: like we fought hard to make this thing work, and uh,
• 1:03:07
  Speaker 1: we gave it everything we could and it does. I mean,
• 1:03:10
  Speaker 1: I think there isn't a formula. There isn't a cookie
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 1: cutter formula to how this thing works and how it
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: doesn't work. I mean, your relationship is unique and my
• 1:03:20
  Speaker 1: relationship is unique, and the one thing we can do
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 1: is lean on friends to first support and and advice
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 1: when it's given. But this just that out for anybody,
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 1: and I think fans of the show do this. You
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 1: can see it on social media. You know, you could
• 1:03:35
  Speaker 1: see it when our season was rapping for anybody to
• 1:03:38
  Speaker 1: sit out there and claim that they know best. Um,
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: most of the time those people don't. And I think
• 1:03:45
  Speaker 1: that's where where I just care, maybe just offended, is Hey,
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 1: you have no clue how it's hard we work. That
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 1: makes it trying to make this relationship work, bachelor or not.
• 1:03:55
  Speaker 1: If we take the bachelor out of it, this is
• 1:03:57
  Speaker 1: a real relationship, just like I what to you. Yeah,
• 1:04:01
  Speaker 1: I mean I think, I mean both of us. Um,
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 1: we talked to a lot of friends. I think I
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 1: know both of us. We all we we saw it
• 1:04:09
  Speaker 1: professional relationship, counseling and and things like that. Um um
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: it's ah yeah, And I think it's because it's a
• 1:04:18
  Speaker 1: it is personal, and I think there's a lot of
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 1: personal sadness when it doesn't work out. Um, it's it's
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: you invest so much and then you have to kind
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 1: of admit that maybe it's best for everyone to just
• 1:04:29
  Speaker 1: as much as there's love there, to let each other go.
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 1: It's it sucks to read things. And again, I I
• 1:04:34
  Speaker 1: have to you know, I knew that, you know, I
• 1:04:37
  Speaker 1: was pursuing acting before I was asked to be the Bachelor.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: I knew that because I wanted to do Dancing with
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: the Stars and the fact that I was out in
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 1: l A and continuing to pursue that post show, I
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: was gonna set myself up for potential criticism of wanting
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: to be famous or caring more about my career in
• 1:04:57
  Speaker 1: my relationship with Vanessa. Um, and that's something that had
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 1: to just accept. Vanessa was always again very supportive of that,
• 1:05:04
  Speaker 1: um and was really a great in terms of supporting
• 1:05:09
  Speaker 1: my ambitions, and hopefully I was for her. But um, yeah,
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: it's it's it can be hurtful, um because yeah, a
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: lot of people do make assumptions, and um, sometimes you
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: things don't work out because sometimes two people can love
• 1:05:27
  Speaker 1: each other and just not be really good at bring
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 1: out the best in the other person. Sometimes there's compatibility
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: issues and you know, um, you can really care for
• 1:05:36
  Speaker 1: someone and just not be great at um being the
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 1: best fit for them and and vice versa. And that happens.
• 1:05:45
  Speaker 1: It happens a lot in relationships. And I think we
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: all just hope that we're lucky enough to to meet
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: that person who who does it for us and then
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 1: we can all be happy. I mean, NICKI is usual,
• 1:05:58
  Speaker 1: and it's what typical here is you speak truth, and
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 1: you speak in a relatable way. And I think one thing,
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: um that has always been helpful with me is the
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: just truthful, honest advice that you've given not only to me,
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: but just you know as a bachelor or as I've
• 1:06:15
  Speaker 1: walked through this experience, and also your critiques of me,
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: and you're honest, just your honest feedback Um, but I
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: think that's how this world works and operates. You heard
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 1: it with Astley and kevinet a little bit ago. Is
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: whether two of them are so close to each other
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: and they know they're going to live in this world together, um,
• 1:06:30
  Speaker 1: where they're gonna be talked about publicly, that the best
• 1:06:33
  Speaker 1: way to do is to sup pour each other through
• 1:06:35
  Speaker 1: the stick and the thin. Um. And it's what we
• 1:06:37
  Speaker 1: hope with Ari. Uh. You know, for all this being said,
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 1: for any advice we've been given, or any advice that
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 1: we haven't been given post bachelor, one thing we can
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: tell our is we wish the best. I mean, he
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 1: might not have done it perfect, none of us did, um,
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 1: but we hope Uh. The ris relationship UH stands the
• 1:06:56
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• 1:06:59
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• 1:07:03
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• 1:07:05
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• 1:07:10
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• 1:08:28
  Speaker 1: to now, Ben, I know that you have to go,
• 1:08:31
  Speaker 1: So I'm going to take over with Nick now and
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: do some listener emails. Hey, that sounds awesome. Nick again,
• 1:08:37
  Speaker 1: thank you for coming on, Thanks for being a good friend. Actually,
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: I'm wishing you the best. I'll talk to you soon.
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 1: Keep your head as girl. Thank you. Goodbye. Okay, bye guys, Nick,
• 1:08:48
  Speaker 1: are you ready to do some relationship questions? People love
• 1:08:54
  Speaker 1: people love relationship advice from you? Yes, they do. I mean,
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 1: like I know the best track record publicly, however, you
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 1: have great relationship advice. Thanks your fat handed compliment. Um.
• 1:09:10
  Speaker 1: So Nick, last week we had an amazing email, like
• 1:09:14
  Speaker 1: juicy one from this girl named anonymous. Was it amazing
• 1:09:18
  Speaker 1: or well, it was juicy for us and like probably
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 1: a horrible situation for her to be in personally. So basically, yes,
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: she's been in a wonderful relationship for five years. She
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: really adored. The problem. Okay, the problem is that there's
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 1: this guy that she found. I think he may be
• 1:09:35
  Speaker 1: at work. She has a mad crush on him, can't
• 1:09:38
  Speaker 1: stop thinking about him, and she's thinking, what do I do?
• 1:09:41
  Speaker 1: Should I not be having these feelings if it's right
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 1: with my boyfriend? Or is it natural to have a crush.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 1: So we got a ton of emails back about this,
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: and yeah, there are two schools of thought. Some people think, oh,
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 1: this is totally human nature to develop a crush when
• 1:09:57
  Speaker 1: you've been in a five year relationship, Like, it's just
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: a crush, ignore it and be true to your man.
• 1:10:01
  Speaker 1: And the other half are saying, if you're feeling these
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: kinds of feelings, it's obviously not right with your boyfriend.
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 1: What do you think? I think it is natural to
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 1: you know, I'm not a big believer, as I've mentioned before,
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: that there's a one only for anyone. I think it's
• 1:10:17
  Speaker 1: very easy for people to be attracted to multiple people
• 1:10:21
  Speaker 1: in a lot of different ways. It could be a
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: physical attraction, could be an emotional connection. And obviously the
• 1:10:27
  Speaker 1: beauty of being with someone in an exclusive relationship is
• 1:10:30
  Speaker 1: that choice of saying no to those temptations that UM
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: are are going to be constant, especially in a world
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 1: like we have today, where things like social media and
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 1: people's short attention spans make UM temptation that more prevalent.
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 1: But UM, I guess it's just a matter of how
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 1: much we indulge in it. I mean, I don't even
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 1: dismiss the fact that this person went out of their
• 1:10:56
  Speaker 1: way to right you guys, as much as they might
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: seek the advice of of Ben and Ashley. Sure, but
• 1:11:05
  Speaker 1: I mean it takes some actual I mean that this
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 1: person is down a rabbit hole, they are suffering going
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 1: anywhere for advice, so you know, you just kind of
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: I think when it comes to things like temptation, you
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 1: the mature thing to do, the right thing to do,
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: is it's one thing to have temptation. It's you can't
• 1:11:25
  Speaker 1: help but be attracted to people. Doesn't mean you're in
• 1:11:27
  Speaker 1: love with them, doesn't mean you're going to act in
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: any of those temptations. But you can be drawn to
• 1:11:32
  Speaker 1: all sorts of people. You can be drawn to the
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 1: people of the same sex without it being any type
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 1: of romantic you know. You know, there's always things that
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: attract us to other people. When it comes to um,
• 1:11:44
  Speaker 1: you know, romantic involvement. Again, I think it's the mature
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: thing to do is to not act on it, to
• 1:11:49
  Speaker 1: not indulge in it, to not you know, pine on
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 1: the thought of this person, the fact that this person
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 1: is wondering, you know what should I do. I think
• 1:11:57
  Speaker 1: there's something there that they might need to explore because
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 1: maybe maybe their quote unquote amazing relationship isn't so amazing. So,
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 1: you know, it's it's hard to say with you think, well,
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 1: it's hard to say with such little information, I would
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 1: love to kind of ask questions about this person's amazing
• 1:12:13
  Speaker 1: relationship and find out if it is in fact amazing.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: But um, but the law, you know, I think it
• 1:12:20
  Speaker 1: just comes down to it's one thing to have sensations
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: and to be attracted to people in whatever way it's
• 1:12:26
  Speaker 1: it's quite another to act on it. And sometimes we
• 1:12:30
  Speaker 1: play with fire and and sometimes we get burnt. Well
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: speaking about, um, you know, emotionally cheating. This is an
• 1:12:37
  Speaker 1: email from Katie in response to anonymous email. She says, hey,
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 1: Been and Ashley love the podcast and not normally want
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 1: to email in, but after hearing actually read the anonymous email,
• 1:12:47
  Speaker 1: I had to write in. For anyone who feels similar
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 1: to anonymous in a long term relationship but has feelings
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: for another person, emotional cheating is still cheating, and it
• 1:12:56
  Speaker 1: can be more hurtful than a one night stand. You're
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 1: opening yourself up into really to another person, sharing parts
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 1: of yourself that should be reserved for your partner. Please
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 1: don't think that sending friendly messages to a person you
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 1: have feelings for is innocent or not. In no, I
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: think I think Katie's jumping the gun here. I don't
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 1: think that anonymous is emotionally cheating. Um. She just seems
• 1:13:20
  Speaker 1: to be like kind of admiring more from afar Um.
• 1:13:23
  Speaker 1: She continued to say. If that message couldn't be in
• 1:13:26
  Speaker 1: a group message with where your significant other, it should
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 1: not be done at all. I mean, I agree in
• 1:13:32
  Speaker 1: the sense that, again, we can't help who we sometimes
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: thoughts pop in our head. But you know, again, that
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 1: emotional cheating comes in when that person is like, well,
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: I'm I would never cheat, I would never you know,
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 1: hook up with someone. But then they you know, they
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: might send a text, be like what's up. You know, hey,
• 1:13:51
  Speaker 1: it was good to see you today or whatever. They
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: just kind of keep that that dialogue open and they're
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 1: again they're playing with fire, and maybe that stops there. Uh,
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: maybe that person responds back and all of a sudden,
• 1:14:03
  Speaker 1: they're grabbing coffee together just as quote unquote friends or whatever,
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 1: maybe to start hanging out more, and those things escalate
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 1: even further. So it just depends on, um, how much
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 1: anyone person is going to kind of act on again
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 1: these emotions and and do anything. I think what Katie's
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: referring to, right now is what I said. I think
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: I don't know. She's not married to her five year boyfriend.
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 1: Maybe she needs to just get to know this guy
• 1:14:28
  Speaker 1: a little bit more to make sure that it's just
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 1: an infatuation and not really something that she wants to
• 1:14:35
  Speaker 1: be Well, no, I don't think confirmed that she doesn't
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 1: really want to be with this guy. I disagree. I
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 1: think the right and noble thing to do that if
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 1: she has any doubt whatsoever that this current relationship isn't
• 1:14:46
  Speaker 1: the one for her, but she thinks the current relationship
• 1:14:48
  Speaker 1: is the one for well, it doesn't sound like she's
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: so sure. I think maybe she should take a step back,
• 1:14:54
  Speaker 1: try to distance her thoughts from this guy and really
• 1:14:58
  Speaker 1: be honest with herself and explore this current relationship. And
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 1: I think if she's going to be in this relationship
• 1:15:03
  Speaker 1: and at any point she should really, you know, take
• 1:15:08
  Speaker 1: a look in the mirror and really instead of just
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 1: casually be like it's I'm an amazing relationship. Maybe it
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 1: was amazing. Maybe she's a lot of times people are
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 1: in relationships, and if they're in a long term relationship,
• 1:15:19
  Speaker 1: they most of the strength of the relationship is often
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 1: like kind of built on the the first six months
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 1: of it, right, the honeymoon phase. And you know, it
• 1:15:29
  Speaker 1: happens with a lot of relationships. But you know, sometimes
• 1:15:31
  Speaker 1: people will be in a year, year and a half,
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 1: two years relationship and they'll have some problems and they
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 1: stay together. They love each other and they're used to
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 1: each other, comfortable with each other, but most of the
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 1: good doesn't happen anymore. It only happened in the in
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 1: the first five months. But maybe they like the way
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 1: they look together. Maybe they've just told themselves this is
• 1:15:48
  Speaker 1: whom gonna end up with. And and sometimes people, um
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 1: realize they're not really happy, you know, but they they
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 1: will outwardly when they talk, Oh I love my boyfriend,
• 1:15:57
  Speaker 1: I love my girlfriend. Maybe that's not the case. You know,
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 1: there is a reason why, um, you are so drawn
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 1: to someone. I think there's a big difference between you know,
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: walking down the street or going into work and and
• 1:16:10
  Speaker 1: seeing some of the success sex um and saying, wow,
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: that's that's an attractive person and they're charming and you know,
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 1: if well, if I were if I were single, that
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 1: what a catch. You know, that's that that can happen.
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 1: But this person is not doing This person is going
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: they're obsessing their pining, and there's a reason for that,
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 1: and I doubt it's just because this other person is
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 1: so fantastic. It probably there's probably something going on in
• 1:16:33
  Speaker 1: their current relationship that they're they're not being honest with
• 1:16:35
  Speaker 1: themselves about. So I would say explore that first, do
• 1:16:39
  Speaker 1: the right thing and don't make it. Don't be a
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 1: monkey swinging from one branch to another. Um, focus on
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 1: the relationship that you're in just to play devil's advocate. Um.
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 1: Don't you feel like there's so many couples out there
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 1: that like, we're strongly with somebody and then they didn't
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 1: realize that like the love of their life would be
• 1:16:58
  Speaker 1: even grander when they just came a long And of
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 1: course they came along while they were still with the
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 1: other person. Sure that can happen, but again, do the
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: right thing. That's emotionally cheat or it's not to your
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 1: toes in a different pond to see if you like
• 1:17:15
  Speaker 1: the temperature. Okay, so you're like you've got a complete
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 1: one before going on obviously, Well, thank you for that's
• 1:17:21
  Speaker 1: what adults do. Thank you. Yes, Um, this one from
• 1:17:25
  Speaker 1: Yes that's very accurate from Taylor. I was listening to
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 1: the podcast, and my heart dropped when I heard the
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 1: anonymous email, and I had to share my story. I
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 1: did in my high school sweetheart for seven years, even
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 1: though through four of those years we were going to
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 1: different colleges. However, our last year together, I started to
• 1:17:43
  Speaker 1: develop a crush out of guy that I met on
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 1: a spring break trip my senior year, and I decided
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: that I just couldn't continue my current relationship. I knew
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 1: it wasn't fair that he was all in and I
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 1: was only happen so I love the person I had
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: loved for seven years. It was so hard to explain,
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 1: but to this day, I still can't explain it. There
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 1: was nothing wrong about him, nothing I would have changed
• 1:18:02
  Speaker 1: about him, but in my heart, I just knew it
• 1:18:04
  Speaker 1: wasn't right. Two years later, I'm happily engaged to my
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 1: soul mate, and I couldn't be happier. It is not
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: the act, not the crush from spring break, but somebody new.
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: I just want this girl to know that she's not
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 1: the only one who has been in the situation, and
• 1:18:16
  Speaker 1: that there might not even be anything truly wrong with
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 1: her relationship. I just searched for months to find a
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 1: reason why things didn't work, and I felt extremely, extremely
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 1: guilty for hurting someone who I thought was I thought
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 1: so highly of. I finally had to just forgive myself
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 1: be confident in my decision and God's plan for me.
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: Sometimes your heart just knows that God has someone out
• 1:18:36
  Speaker 1: there for you. That being said, I will also advise
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: her to not think long and hard about it. Oh,
• 1:18:41
  Speaker 1: advise her to think hard and long about it and
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 1: be prepared that in no way will it be easy
• 1:18:47
  Speaker 1: if she does decide to leave her boyfriend of five years. Well, yeah,
• 1:18:52
  Speaker 1: I mean short answer. Yeah, you know, my very first
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 1: relationship when I we date it off and on for
• 1:19:00
  Speaker 1: seven years. Part of first relationship is you just don't
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 1: know anything else. You know. It was so hard for
• 1:19:07
  Speaker 1: me to get over my first love because I didn't
• 1:19:09
  Speaker 1: and I didn't know what I was like to love
• 1:19:10
  Speaker 1: anyone else in that way. Um. And yeah, some it's
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 1: especially it's not nineteen fifteen anymore. You know. Back in
• 1:19:18
  Speaker 1: the day, you would meet someone in your early twenties,
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: you'd fall in love and be like, well, let's let's
• 1:19:24
  Speaker 1: get married. Um, it's just a different time. And so
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 1: again with just the way society is for better or worse. Um. Sometimes,
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 1: you know, most people don't end up with their first
• 1:19:34
  Speaker 1: loves anymore, and it's probably a good thing because we
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 1: mature and grow as individuals. I think people now mature
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: later in life. They mature more and more in their
• 1:19:42
  Speaker 1: twenties and they I think they did back then. And
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 1: you can love someone, um and have them not be
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 1: the one, and sometimes it's maybe better to you know,
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 1: let something go and see if it's really worth coming back.
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 1: You know that old saying if you love something said
• 1:19:59
  Speaker 1: it reason to speak. There's some truth to that. So yeah,
• 1:20:03
  Speaker 1: I mean, do we know how old Anonymous is? By
• 1:20:06
  Speaker 1: the way, I think she's in her twenties, you know.
• 1:20:09
  Speaker 1: And so like dating, I mean, when you get older,
• 1:20:13
  Speaker 1: the good part about dating is you, through failed relationships,
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 1: have a better idea of what you want. You know.
• 1:20:19
  Speaker 1: The bad part about that is things become less romantic
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 1: in a way. When you're young, you fall in love,
• 1:20:24
  Speaker 1: You're like, I love you, let's let's date. You know.
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 1: When you're older, I think you, um, it's like, well,
• 1:20:31
  Speaker 1: I've dated someone like this before, I'd like someone this before.
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 1: It's harder to just fall in love overnight, you know.
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: I used to be someone who fell really quickly, and
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 1: now for me, it's harder because a more objective because
• 1:20:44
  Speaker 1: I've just I've been in you know, handful of relationships
• 1:20:47
  Speaker 1: were I don't just jump in and when you're younger,
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 1: just like it's so easy to become infatuated. Is that
• 1:20:55
  Speaker 1: like from fear of being heartbroken? I don't really believe
• 1:20:58
  Speaker 1: in that. I don't get that fear. I don't have that. No.
• 1:21:00
  Speaker 1: I mean it's not a fear of being heartbroken. It's
• 1:21:03
  Speaker 1: more of a you're just you know more and you're
• 1:21:07
  Speaker 1: kind of almost in a way, it sounds almost unrematched.
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 1: I think you you've the the excitement or the there
• 1:21:15
  Speaker 1: is something that's missing when you get older, when like
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 1: when you're younger, you just don't know. It's like you
• 1:21:19
  Speaker 1: meet someone, you're like, this is what is this feeling? Great?
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 1: I have a whole I don't get a podcast about
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 1: that feeling and how you kind of stop feeling it
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 1: no matter who comes into your life. You're like, wait,
• 1:21:34
  Speaker 1: I miss that like seeing my crush in the hallway feeling.
• 1:21:37
  Speaker 1: I can't replicate it these days. It's harder. It's it's
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 1: it's it's the benefit of having perspective. I think it's
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 1: important to have perspective, but sometimes perspective makes life a
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 1: little less fun, you know, because you butterflies, they're not
• 1:21:49
  Speaker 1: as big anymore. The the idea I think is hopefully
• 1:21:53
  Speaker 1: that you, um, if you ever are lucky enough to
• 1:21:56
  Speaker 1: get those butterflies, as you gain perspective in life, that
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 1: it will be more genuine and long lasting. Um. But
• 1:22:03
  Speaker 1: I think, you know, as you gain more perspective and maturity,
• 1:22:06
  Speaker 1: it's it's you might have the initial butterflies, but then
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 1: there's then there's that you know thought in your head
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 1: that's well, I mean, is this really what I think
• 1:22:13
  Speaker 1: it is? Or you know, I've I've had this feeling
• 1:22:17
  Speaker 1: before and this person they're sure, they sure are similar
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 1: to that other person. You know kind of thing. You
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 1: you take a step back and you're you know, when
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 1: you're young, you're just like, let's do this. You know,
• 1:22:28
  Speaker 1: you just kind of fall you you have more, you
• 1:22:30
  Speaker 1: have less reservations and less inhibitions or more is it
• 1:22:33
  Speaker 1: more inhibitions less I don't know. Yeah, and when you
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 1: get across you're like, oh yeah, fun instead of like,
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 1: oh man, where is this gonna go? Alright, So we
• 1:22:44
  Speaker 1: have a question that just through skimming through it seems
• 1:22:47
  Speaker 1: like it was almost directed at you. Nick to um answer.
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 1: This is from Lauren, Hey, Benn, and n Ashley love
• 1:22:54
  Speaker 1: the podcast. Thanks for being my entertainment during my two
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 1: hour daily commute. Darn all, that's long. I was curious
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 1: to see what your thoughts were about why Becca agreed
• 1:23:05
  Speaker 1: to be the bachelorette. Honestly, if it were me, I
• 1:23:08
  Speaker 1: would feel betrayed by the producers for ambushing me with
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 1: cameras during the relations During the breakup, not to mention,
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 1: there were producers asking her on the interview before already
• 1:23:17
  Speaker 1: got there if she was in love with him and
• 1:23:20
  Speaker 1: how she felt about the ring, and those producers knew
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 1: exactly what was going to happen. I know that's the
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 1: producer's job to make entertaining TV, but I just don't
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 1: see how Becca could say yes to being the bachelor
• 1:23:31
  Speaker 1: at after producers betrayed her like that. I would feel
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 1: like they would have not been having my best interests
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 1: at heart. You too, always say that producers are good people,
• 1:23:42
  Speaker 1: so I'd like to know what you think is a
• 1:23:44
  Speaker 1: justification for filming the breakup. We know Ariside just wondering
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 1: what made the producers think that this was a good idea.
• 1:23:50
  Speaker 1: Thank you for your insight, Lauren s not be Hey, hey, Nick,
• 1:23:54
  Speaker 1: you've had some very rough experiences. You got down on
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 1: one knee. Well lean never partically never practically never, But
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 1: like you about you were about to lean with with Vanesse.
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 1: I did, but yes, but yes I didn't pick out
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: a ring with Andy, and yes I was prepared with
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 1: with Kay. Obviously. You know we have been in Bachelor World.
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 1: We we have a lot of friends who are producers. Um.
• 1:24:22
  Speaker 1: That's not to say that both of us and Ben
• 1:24:24
  Speaker 1: haven't had our frustrations with the show. It's a different world. Um.
• 1:24:29
  Speaker 1: A lot of people had some strong opinions about the
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 1: finale and the filming on the breakup. People tend to
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 1: always overreact. Um. I always find it funny all the people,
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 1: including a lot of people who are part of bast Nation,
• 1:24:42
  Speaker 1: are tweeting about how this is terrible for them to film,
• 1:24:46
  Speaker 1: yet they're all watching it. Um, you know we know
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 1: one it was. I mean, if you were to read Twitter,
• 1:24:54
  Speaker 1: it was if The Bachelor was airing someone being murdered
• 1:24:58
  Speaker 1: or something, and it is it was a fairly outrageous
• 1:25:01
  Speaker 1: reaction to well, something a little bit personal, you know,
• 1:25:05
  Speaker 1: and it's an interesting world in UM again it well,
• 1:25:11
  Speaker 1: Becca seemed to be okay with it. She's now the batcherette.
• 1:25:13
  Speaker 1: There's a couple whether you agreed, and I certainly have
• 1:25:16
  Speaker 1: some thoughts on it right whether you whether you agreed
• 1:25:19
  Speaker 1: with UM. The producers are ari for doing what they did,
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: and certainly it's easy to criticize some aspects. There's a
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 1: couple of facts that I think you can't argue. One
• 1:25:33
  Speaker 1: is last Monday, before the premiere. I think the general
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 1: thought of Becca was Bachelor Nation liked her. It was like,
• 1:25:41
  Speaker 1: she's nice, she seems like a sweet girl. She didn't
• 1:25:44
  Speaker 1: have UM a ton of air time, and everyone liked her.
• 1:25:48
  Speaker 1: On Tuesday morning, everyone loved her. Everyone was obsessed with her,
• 1:25:51
  Speaker 1: and rightfully so, because she handled a very difficult situation
• 1:25:55
  Speaker 1: with a lot of poise and maturity and class and strength,
• 1:25:59
  Speaker 1: and everyone, you know, kind of felt for her. And
• 1:26:03
  Speaker 1: you know, it's I'm assuming Becca woke up Tuesday morning
• 1:26:07
  Speaker 1: feeling pretty good about herself, and she should. And you know,
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 1: it's weird because in that world sometimes the show UM,
• 1:26:17
  Speaker 1: we'll do things that in the moment, you will feel
• 1:26:20
  Speaker 1: betrayed by them and you will feel hurt and it
• 1:26:23
  Speaker 1: will have a personal impact on your life, only to
• 1:26:26
  Speaker 1: later realize that, well it might have sucked to go through.
• 1:26:30
  Speaker 1: You appreciate, um, some of the fallout of that, and i' becca,
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 1: I'm sure it's no different. And then I had the
• 1:26:37
  Speaker 1: same experience on Caitlin season. Um, you know when I
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 1: I won't get into the details, but um, you know,
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 1: obviously I showed up on Caitlyn season simply because of
• 1:26:48
  Speaker 1: a pre existing relationship we had. And from the moment
• 1:26:51
  Speaker 1: I showed up on on Caitlyn season, Um, there are
• 1:26:54
  Speaker 1: a lot of things that went down between her and
• 1:26:56
  Speaker 1: I off camera that were said or or that happened
• 1:27:00
  Speaker 1: at continue to give me more and more confidence. And
• 1:27:01
  Speaker 1: I remember throughout the process a lot of which was
• 1:27:04
  Speaker 1: off camera, constantly telling Caitlin, listen, you know, I'm only
• 1:27:09
  Speaker 1: here for for you, so if you don't end up
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 1: with me, please just send me home as soon as possible. Now,
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 1: obviously that didn't happen. She took me all the way
• 1:27:17
  Speaker 1: to the end, up to the point where I asked
• 1:27:20
  Speaker 1: her father's permission to get engaged. I picked out a ring.
• 1:27:24
  Speaker 1: I planned a whole speech, I delivered that speech, and
• 1:27:27
  Speaker 1: then right before I got down on my knees, she
• 1:27:31
  Speaker 1: broke up with me. Now, in the moment, I was hurt.
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 1: I was incredibly angry at Caitlin, and um, you know,
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 1: I remember feeling just all this anger, and I remember
• 1:27:43
  Speaker 1: some of the producers, you know, saying, listen, don't be
• 1:27:46
  Speaker 1: angry with her. Obviously, I knew the producers had probably
• 1:27:50
  Speaker 1: encouraged her to take it that far. Um, And it
• 1:27:54
  Speaker 1: was all said and done. The reality is is that
• 1:27:57
  Speaker 1: if Caitlin had not taken me that far, I probably
• 1:28:01
  Speaker 1: would never would have been the bachelor in a lot
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 1: of ways. Um, the way I handled the breakup and
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 1: was probably the first time people kind of empathy had
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 1: empathy for me. It was kind of the first moment
• 1:28:14
  Speaker 1: that Batman Nation started changing their opinion of me. Not everyone,
• 1:28:18
  Speaker 1: but um, how I handled that, you know, that moment
• 1:28:20
  Speaker 1: when they saw my foot come out a limo. And
• 1:28:22
  Speaker 1: then just the way I handled the breakup, I want
• 1:28:25
  Speaker 1: a lot of people over, And that was kind of
• 1:28:27
  Speaker 1: the launching pad into into paradise. And you know, certainly
• 1:28:30
  Speaker 1: I didn't think feel at the time, and I certainly
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: it took a long time for things to play out,
• 1:28:34
  Speaker 1: but I realized that by Caitlin doing that, she gave
• 1:28:37
  Speaker 1: me one of my best moments. And had she say
• 1:28:39
  Speaker 1: sent me home week six, I just would have been
• 1:28:43
  Speaker 1: remembered as the villain from Andy season who showed up
• 1:28:46
  Speaker 1: like a few other people did before, and they quickly dismissed,
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 1: and I would have been an afterthought and people wouldn't
• 1:28:52
  Speaker 1: have thought much of me. Um. And so really hurtful
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 1: moments for you on TV end up being your best
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 1: moment in the long run, and it gets it gets
• 1:29:01
  Speaker 1: you in a place that you would have preferred to
• 1:29:03
  Speaker 1: be in UM and if without that moment, generally I've
• 1:29:06
  Speaker 1: never gotten there. Generally, everyone's best moment in bat Nation,
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 1: just a few exceptions, is when you get dumped. Almost
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 1: almost always, I agree, because that's when the audience really
• 1:29:14
  Speaker 1: connects with you. All Right, Well, you know what, Nick,
• 1:29:18
  Speaker 1: it's always fab to have you here. It's also fun, Um,
• 1:29:23
  Speaker 1: it's and then you are fit, and you know who
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• 1:29:39
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• 1:29:42
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  Speaker 1: the springbox. Rachel Pally reversible clutch to play with this
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• 1:30:03
  Speaker 1: all your stuff, but it's also not gonna be like
• 1:30:06
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• 1:30:08
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  Speaker 1: to this amazing four times a year gift. Thank you
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  Speaker 1: guys so much for listening. Keep those emails coming. It
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 1: is Ben and Ashley at I heart media dot com.
• 1:30:54
  Speaker 1: Thanks to our guests, Nick and Kevin went, and thank
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• 1:31:01
  Speaker 1: Quip and smart Suites. Go to iTunes, leave us a
• 1:31:06
  Speaker 1: review and we'll be back very soon. I've been Ashley,
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 1: but I'm Nick. I've been Nick. It's proper. I've I've
• 1:31:17
  Speaker 1: been Nick not anymore? Can I change my name? This
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 1: is fun? Goodbye. Follow the Bennon Ashley I Almost Famous
• 1:31:26
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