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82. the unexpected journey of being in your 20s... · Hot Girl Energy Podcast

0:13
Hello you guys, and welcome back to another episode of the Hawtgrel Energy Podcast.
0:17
I'm your host, Kayleie, and this is your weekly reminder that it's
0:20
a new day, a new week, a new mindset, and another day
0:23
for you to become the Hawkgirl energy you want to attract. Hello you guys,
0:28
Happy Tuesday. I am not feeling the best, which really sucks.
0:34
So if you hear my voice kind of cracking at any point during this episode,
0:39
that's why I have no idea why I'm sick. Like, I actually
0:44
have no idea, to be honest, which is kind of shitty, just
0:47
because I feel like I I don't know. I feel like I've done a
0:51
really good job at like slowly getting back into routine and just you know,
0:57
not really going out much. I've been getting good sleeps, so I'm not
1:00
really sure why I'm sick. But maybe it's my body telling me to slow
1:04
down a bit more than I already am. I have no idea. I
1:07
mean, there has been a lot going on since I've been home with work
1:11
and the wedding and all that, but yeah, anyways, it's just my
1:15
throat. I hate when my throat feels like this, and I just have
1:18
no energy. And you guys know, whenever you're sick, you just don't
1:22
feel the greatest. So that is my current state right now. So I
1:26
apologize if my voice, you know, gets a little cracky at some points
1:30
when I'm speaking, just because of my throat. But I was not going
1:34
to miss recording an episode this week, So I hope you guys are having
1:38
an amazing week so far. I can't believe we're already at the end of
1:41
April. It is crazy how fast time is going by. But as soon
1:48
as May hits, I feel like I'm going to be in the summer mindset
1:52
where I'm just excited for the summer season and yeah, just warmer weather,
1:57
fun things to do, more episodes coming out for summer all that. You
2:00
guys know how much I love talking about summer episodes here on the podcast.
2:05
It's just fun, it's motivating. And yeah, I wanted to let you
2:08
guys know something that I actually ordered this weekend because I think I talked about
2:13
it a few episodes ago about me getting back into running because I obviously haven't
2:17
been running since the weather has been crappy with the winter season, spring season.
2:23
All that, it's finally starting to get nice out again, which is
2:25
nice, and I ordered myself a good pair of running shoes. I ended
2:30
up ordering the Hookahs because obviously I feel like a lot of runners have those
2:35
shoes, and I wanted to invest in a good quality pair of shoes because
2:39
last year I literally was just running on like normal Nike trainers that were honestly
2:45
not meant for running. And I think that was honestly impacting my knees because
2:50
I had really sore knees last summer, and I think it's just because I
2:53
didn't have a good quality running shoes. So I invested in a good pair.
2:59
They just came in. So I'm hoping once I'm feeling a bit better,
3:02
I can create a running blog and take you guys with me for my
3:06
first run for the season. So I'm really excited about that because since we're
3:12
so close to my wedding, I feel like I've been trying to make my
3:14
workout routine a really big priority. I've been trying to work out like six
3:16
times a week, and yeah, even Zach's like jumping on the same train
3:21
as me. We're both like wanting just to focus on ourselves these next few
3:23
months. Prior to the wedding, and it's just like a really good way
3:27
to motivate ourselves to you know, just feel our best self, get into
3:30
shape, eating healthier, all that. I mean, you know, that
3:34
is what we already do essentially, but we're just trying to do a level
3:38
up, you know what I mean now that the wedding is so close by.
3:40
So anyways, that's what I literally did this weekend. That's basically it
3:44
was just order a pair of running shoes. Other than that, it was
3:46
pretty chill. That was honestly it. We really didn't do much this weekend.
3:50
I did a pilates class, we did a bunch of workout classes.
3:53
That was basically it cleaned the house, did a whole Sunday reset and it
3:55
feels really good. I really deep cleaned a lot of the bathrooms, my
3:59
clothes. The next step is now to do a closet clean out. Hopefully
4:03
probably not this weekend just because I leave for my trip next week, so
4:08
probably the following weekend. But I want to do well, not the following
4:11
weekend because I'll be in London, but the following weekend after that, once
4:14
I get home from London, I want to do like a Poshmark clean out
4:17
sell some stuff. I'll make sure to link my poshmark on my Instagram if
4:21
you guys are interested. Just from like the most recent trips that I've been
4:25
on, like Mexico, La, probably some stuff that I wear in London.
4:29
I just want to get rid of some stuff just because I know I'm
4:30
not going to rewar it again and I would rather someone like you guys or
4:34
someone else to get used to the pieces versus just you know, collecting dust
4:40
in my closet. It just doesn't make sense, So keep you guys posted
4:43
on that. But I'm due for a spring cleanout for my closet for sure,
4:46
and I know how good it feels whenever you do it, so that
4:47
will be my to do list once I get back from the wedding planning trip
4:51
in London, which I'm so excited about. If you're from London, please
4:56
send me some recommendations of anything when it comes to foods, tourist places all
5:00
that. I think. We're staying close to notting Hill like the Kensington area,
5:05
I believe, which I'm super excited about. We do want to do
5:10
a lot of shopping. I need to get some stuff for the wedding,
5:13
and then also I want to hit up some tourist locations because I've never been
5:16
to London and it's been on my like dream travel spot to go to.
5:20
So I'm so so excited. I know some of you guys actually message me
5:24
saying please do a meetup, and I really don't know if we'll have the
5:28
time, but maybe I will. We'll see. Maybe we like all meet
5:31
at one spot and we can all just like go on a walk together or
5:33
something. I think that would be really fun. So if a lot of
5:36
you live there, let me know because I'd be super fun. I would
5:39
love to meet you all in person, and I think that could be a
5:41
really fun thing to do. But as I said, let me just make
5:45
sure I have the time to do. So maybe on like our last day
5:46
before we fly out, we do a little hawkerl walk in the morning.
5:50
But let me know if you're from there, because I'd be super fun.
5:53
Anyways, I'm gonna stop rambling here and get to the point of this episode.
5:57
But I really wanted to talk about things that I didn't excite in my
6:00
twenties because I feel like I never really recorded a birthday episode. I really
6:04
wanted to do like, you know, twenty eight things or twenty seven things
6:08
that I learned within the twenty seven years and me being alive or whatever.
6:11
You know. People to ability do that for their birthday episode, they just
6:13
talk about things that they've learned as they've gotten older, and I feel like
6:16
I never really got the opportunity to do an episode like that, So instead
6:20
of things that I've learned, I kind of wanted to talk about things that
6:24
I didn't expect going into my twenties, that I fully expected to happen,
6:30
like thinking about myself at sixteen or seventeen years old, like this is what
6:34
I expected to happen in my twenties and it didn't, or just I was
6:39
shocked to see where I was at in my twenties and at this stage in
6:43
my life. So let's get into it. I'm excited to just share some
6:47
personal experiences and some just my honest opinions on certain things from my own personal
6:54
experience. And I want to also point out that at the end of the
6:57
day, I am only twenty eight. I am still learning and I'm still
7:00
aging. So I don't want anyone to be like, you're only twenty eight,
7:03
Like if you're older than me, like you still have so much more
7:08
life to live whatever, Like, I totally get it. I'm totally in
7:11
agreement. I know I'm only twenty eight, but I know a lot of
7:13
you are also younger than me and might want to hear from my perspective in
7:16
terms of things that I've experienced in my twenties and yeah, just things I
7:20
was kind of shocked about going into yeah these past few years. So let's
7:26
get into it. Okay, I'm gonna start with this one because I think
7:28
this is something that a lot of people can relate to, and that is
7:32
feeling like an adult, but you actually don't, Like I do not feel
7:36
like an adult at all. I think when I look at myself at sixteen
7:41
or seventeen years old, I fully thought that I was going to have my
7:43
shit together in my twenties. And you know, some people may think that
7:47
I have my shit together based off of social media. Remember that social media
7:50
is just a highlight. But I honestly feel like I don't feel like an
7:55
adult at times. I still have a hard time, like understanding the bill
8:00
that I have to pay for, you know, my taxes, and I
8:01
think that like I know nothing when it comes to that kind of things,
8:05
and I still ask my parents for help on that. Like I just fully
8:09
don't feel like an adult. And I don't know if you're ever supposed to
8:13
have that feeling. I don't know, like maybe that's later in life,
8:16
maybe that's in my thirties or my forties, but I still feel like I
8:20
have so much more to learn and to become an adult. And I just
8:24
thought, for some reason, being in my late twenties, I totally thought
8:28
at this point I would have everything figured out and that I would fully be
8:33
on my way to adulthood. And I'm definitely not. Like I'm still learning,
8:37
you know, living in a home, owning a home, there's obviously
8:39
bills that have to be paid and all that, and still understanding like why
8:41
am I paying these you know, interesting expenses that I have to pay yearly
8:46
or monthly or whatever. When it comes to the whole taxes thing, I
8:50
freriacking hate paying taxes. I'm sure everybody hates that, but there's just like
8:52
little things like that where it's just like, I like still don't understand that.
8:56
And that's okay, because at the end of the day, I am
9:00
still learning, I am still developing. New skills and it's okay to be
9:03
able to ask your parents for help or anything like that. Like, I
9:07
don't know. I just think that was something that I was super shocked about
9:09
and thought that I would be able to feel like an adult at this point,
9:13
but I really don't. I would say I definitely feel obviously more skilled
9:18
and developed than what I was when I was sixteen. I've definitely learned a
9:20
lot, I've grown a lot, But I just think I thought I would
9:24
have had more skill and more education I guess at this point in my life.
9:28
But I think as you age, you obviously develop new skills, you
9:33
learn more things in your life all that. So I don't know. That's
9:37
just how I feel. I feel like I haven't hit that adult peak yet
9:41
in my life, and maybe down the road I will and maybe I won't.
9:46
But I think it's always okay to be able to lean on your parents
9:50
for advice or anything like that. And that's another one that I really wanted
9:52
to highlight, which is I never thought I would need my family for anything,
9:58
like I thought like, once I moved out, I'm good to be
10:00
on my own. I don't need to ask my family for support or ask
10:03
them for help or anything like that. But I think as I moved out,
10:07
I realized how important family was to me and how I love how they're
10:13
still always there for me. I am very close with my parents and I'm
10:16
very grateful for that. And when I lived with them, of course,
10:18
they were a huge part of my life, and I feel like, you
10:20
know, I relied on them for everything. But I think I had this
10:24
vision in my head that moving out in my twenties, I was going to
10:26
be, you know fully on my own. I was going to be able
10:28
to deal with everything myself, wouldn't need to lean on them for any advice
10:31
or anything like that. When the reality is is that I lean on my
10:35
parents so much and they are such huge role models for me, and I
10:39
feel so lucky that I'm able to, you know, have them even part
10:43
of my career right now, helping them build my business and being able to
10:48
have them for the support and all that. Like, it's so amazing having
10:52
a family that you know, wants to be involved in your life so much
10:56
and wants to be there for you and support you. And I think that's
11:00
obviously a role of a parent as well, but it's good to know that
11:03
They're still there for me even when I don't live with them and help me
11:07
through anything that I do need help with. And one thing for me is,
11:11
you know, I look at my dad for an example. My dad
11:13
has always been a huge role model to me. He has always been a
11:16
business owner. He's always been very business driven, and that was someone that
11:20
I always aspired to be, like I've always wanted to own my own business.
11:24
I've always wanted to work for myself. And he has just taught me
11:28
so much in the business world and has helped me learn so many skills and
11:31
being able to adapt to that in my own personal life has been so amazing.
11:37
So I think it's good to have parents's role models and have your parents
11:39
there for you, and just know that it's okay to lean on your parents
11:45
for help even in your twenties, because, as I said, you're still
11:46
learning, you're still growing. You should have the support of your family to
11:50
help you out through life. And I think that's going to be a thing
11:52
that's going to be going on forever. Like I hope to lean on my
11:56
parents and my thirties and my forties, like I hope to always have their
11:58
support as long as I can have them, you know, around and all
12:03
that and be lucky to have them around. So yeah, I think that's
12:07
just something I wasn't expecting is realizing how much I would lean on them for
12:11
support. So but I'm grateful for it. Another thing I didn't expect in
12:15
my twenties was preferring nights in versus nights out. I always had this vision
12:20
that I would be a going out girl. Like I always thought that the
12:26
best way to have fun, the most way to have fun is to always
12:28
be going out with your friends and drinking and being in that party life like
12:31
you don't want to miss out on opportunities like this is what living means,
12:35
Like live your best life by going out, staying out late, getting blackout,
12:39
drunk, whatever like that is definitely not what I want now. Being
12:45
in my twenties has made me realize that I prefer staying in, and I
12:50
prefer drinking less, and I would rather have a small group of girls here
12:54
at my house having a glass of wine and chatting the night away versus going
12:58
out to a bar or club getting wasted, and consider that like, living
13:03
my life like that, to me is not what I expected. I thought.
13:07
You know, when younger Kaylee, she would be wanting to go out,
13:11
and you know, of course I want to learn new experiences and go
13:13
out the odd time, but it's not like I want to do that every
13:16
single weekend. Like I think that's what I thought I would want, but
13:20
I don't. And like, I just have really adapted to not really drinking
13:26
much alcohol, and you know, having a glass or two whenever I do
13:30
go out and enjoy it. And of course there's some times depending on the
13:33
situation, like I'll have a few more for me. I don't think drinking
13:37
more defines how much fun you're having. I could have one glass of wine
13:41
and still enjoy my night without getting blackout drunk. And I think people need
13:46
to normalize that more. And yeah, I don't know. I just feel
13:50
like people have this mentality that it's okay, I need to get wasted in
13:52
order to have fun, when the reality is is like you don't. You
13:56
just need to have the mindset of enjoying yourself and having fun with just by
14:00
having a glass of wine or not drinking at all. If you don't drink
14:03
at all, like that's even better, Like it doesn't have to create this
14:09
persona of you that like, oh, I need to drink in order to
14:13
have fun, Like you can have fun without drinking, it's totally normal.
14:16
But I don't know. I feel like people think when you're in your twenties,
14:18
like you need to drink to have fun, and I just don't think
14:22
that's reality. But you know, I like to have an occasional glass of
14:26
wine, and a lot more so just because I like the taste of wine.
14:28
It's not because of the purpose of me feeling, you know, drunk.
14:31
I feel like when I drink, my anxiety peaks. Like I'm sure
14:35
a lot of people can relate to that, Like there's other things that I
14:37
personally find happen when I have alcohol. But some people remove it completely because
14:41
it's so bad for their anxiety or their stress or anything like that, which
14:46
I think is the right thing to do. But I feel like, yes,
14:50
it peaks my anxiety, but I wouldn't say it peaks it to the
14:52
point where it's like I need to stop, I need to cut it out
14:54
of my life. It's more so just like monitor how much I'm drinking for
14:58
it to not get to a really bad point, if that makes sense.
15:01
Being able to have nights in is something that I never thought I would enjoy
15:05
more than partying and going out. But yeah, I don't know. I
15:09
think that's just something, Yeah, I like to do. It's my favorite
15:13
thing ever, and I think that's okay to do in your twenties. Okay.
15:16
This next one is more just a personal experience in terms of what I
15:18
didn't expect in my twenties, and that is being engaged at twenty seven.
15:24
I honestly thought I was going to be engaged by like twenty four to twenty
15:28
five. And you know, some people do get engaged that early in their
15:31
life and that young, and it's very common, I think at this point.
15:35
But I think for me financially, at that point in my life,
15:39
I was wanting to put that money towards a house versus a ring. And
15:43
Zach fully asked me because at that point Zach and I were dating for like
15:46
six or seven years, and he's like, do you want to get married
15:50
first or do you want to get a house? And I think that was
15:52
a smart adult decision on our side in terms of investing our money in a
15:56
home versus an engagement, because yes, I could have had a long engagement
16:00
and then you know, saved a less money for the wedding and all that.
16:04
But you know, putting all that money down on a ring versus a
16:08
house, it just to me didn't make any sense at that point in our
16:11
life, Like I would rather have put that money towards a house, which
16:15
we did, and you know, move into a spot that now we can
16:19
live, you know, if we want to live here for years pon years.
16:22
I don't know if we will, but it still was way worth the
16:26
investment to invest in a home that we own, not even a rental property
16:30
like we fully own this place. I think that was so much more rewarding
16:33
and worth the investment versus a ring at that phase in our life. I
16:37
also felt super young. I didn't really feel like I was ready to take
16:40
on marriage at that point in my life. I felt like it was just
16:44
not like it was too fast because Zach and I have been dating for so
16:45
long, Like obviously we both knew that we were ready to talk about future
16:48
plans and all that at that age, but a house was more important to
16:52
us versus a ring. And obviously everyone's going to have a different opinion on
16:56
that, but I think it really just depends on your relationship and how you
16:59
community with each other. I think that's important to communicate those things with your
17:03
partner if you are talking about future plans, like what's most important to you
17:07
living together before marriage or being married, and then you know, moving into
17:12
a spot. I really wanted to test out the relationship and see what it
17:17
was like living with him and owning a home with him and all that.
17:18
And obviously we've owned our host now for almost two and a half years,
17:22
so obviously testing it out, being in the same home together, all that
17:25
really helped us confirm that, Okay, we're ready to take the next step,
17:29
which is marriage. Now we're getting married. I just thought I would
17:32
be engaged earlier, because I thought I would already know the next stages and
17:36
next plans in my life at that point, and I wasn't. And now
17:40
you know, twenty seven is when I was engaged and getting married at twenty
17:42
eight, and I feel like that was the right stage for me, Like
17:48
that was the right move. It was the right move to get the house
17:51
first and then get engaged. But of course everyone has their own journey with
17:53
that. But I don't know, that was just something I wasn't expecting.
17:56
I think I was expecting to get engaged, and then get the house by
18:00
Obviously everyone's at different financial stages in their life, And yeah, I think
18:04
that's another big point is finances. I think a lot of people don't realize
18:08
how much money you should be saving or spending. I was lucky that my
18:14
parents taught me at a young age to save your money, save, save,
18:18
save, and I wouldn't have been able to buy the house that I
18:21
have now if I didn't actually implement a good saving technique from my paychecks that
18:26
I would earn from work and all that. Like I'm talking when I was
18:30
like straight out of high school. I want to say, when I was
18:33
like eighteen seventeen eighteen, I was saving every paycheck that I got. I
18:37
would take a certain percentage out and then keep a certain percentage in my debit
18:41
account. And since then, I've been so good at managing my money and
18:45
I saved so much money to the point that I could put entire deposit basically
18:48
on this house, which I'm so grateful for. So if you're the kind
18:52
of person that hasn't been taught that, you need to realize how important it
18:56
is to save your money to be able to put towards alone ar expenses like
19:00
a home or like a wedding or like an engagement, like you do have
19:03
to somewhat plan your future before your twenties to be able to afford those things
19:08
because obviously shit's expensive and that's the reality. But you need to just save
19:15
your money. I think it's important just to take, you know, twenty
19:18
five percent of each check that you make, put it in a savings account
19:22
and just see how much money you'll actually save at the end of the year
19:26
and how rewarding that is and being able to see a future with that money
19:30
in terms of putting it in big investments. And obviously there's a lot of
19:33
stupid things that you have to pay for as an adult, like taxes,
19:37
like bills to the house and all that, which is shit that nobody likes
19:41
to pay for. And trust me, if I could control that, I
19:45
would not want to spend my money on it. I don't think anybody would.
19:48
But that's the reality of being an adult, and that's something that I've
19:52
learned being in my twenties, that is that you have to pay for these
19:56
things in order to live and you know, live in a nice home or
19:59
any like that. So anyways, I think It's just important to realize how
20:03
important your finances are and how important savings are, and not to spend your
20:07
money on stupid shit, like save your money and invest it in good quality
20:11
things. I think another thing that I didn't realize being in my twenties is
20:15
knowing exactly what you want to do with your career. And this was something
20:19
that I honestly didn't figure out until I was twenty five, and that was
20:22
when I actually changed my mindset completely in terms of like, Okay, what
20:29
do you want to do with your life, Hailey, Like you need to
20:30
get your shit together and there's no right or wrong time for that. I
20:33
think for me mentally, I just wasn't happy where I was in my life,
20:40
Like, yeah, I had a decent career. Did I love it?
20:42
No? And I mean I think COVID really impacted a lot of people
20:47
in terms of their mindset, whether they wanted to take the opportunity and you
20:49
know, build a career out of it or you know it just I feel
20:53
like a lot of people changed through COVID for different reasons, and COVID for
20:57
me, really impacted me because I felt like I wasn't happy in terms of
21:02
what I was doing, and I really wanted to make a career change.
21:04
I've always thought about doing social media, but I never thought that it would
21:08
actually become a career of mine. But I had so much passion and so
21:12
much love for it that once I am motivated to do something and dedicated to
21:15
doing something, like I will do it. I make sure I get to
21:19
that end goal that I want to achieve every single time. There's just some
21:22
to a motivation and some to a switch that I just have. So I
21:26
had this career shift that I'm like, hey, I want to try and
21:30
make my full time job social media. Why not try it out. If
21:33
it fails, it fails, at least I could say that I tried and
21:37
I tried hard at doing it. So, you know, I was consistent
21:40
for four to five months, and then that's when my social media took off.
21:44
Don't get me wrong, there was a lot of trial and error,
21:45
and I went through a lot of hard times where you know, I wasn't
21:48
seeing views or growth or anything in my account from posting consistently. But then,
21:53
you know, once eventually I started to see growth that motivated me even
21:56
more even more. And now I'm you know, I can say this is
22:00
my career. But I didn't realize what I wanted to do with my life
22:03
until I was twenty five, so that was definitely something I wasn't expecting.
22:07
In my twenties. I totally thought, you know, right after college,
22:10
I'm going to know what I want to do. I'm gonna, you know,
22:11
take over my dad's business. That was like originally my plan, and
22:15
obviously that didn't happen, and my dad's actually, you know, he sold
22:19
his company and now he's doing something completely different. So I do believe in
22:23
what's meant to be is what's meant to be, and I think the career
22:27
that I'm in is definitely something that was meant to happen to me, and
22:30
I'm so grateful for that. But I truly believe in that mindset in terms
22:34
of what's meant to happen will happen, and it's all for good reasons.
22:38
So I'm very much a believer in that saying, and I feel like that
22:41
has helped me with my career today. Is just kind of going with the
22:45
flow and letting my life just kind of go the way it's going, if
22:51
that makes sense. But yeah, that's definitely not what I was expecting a
22:53
to have this career that I have now and B to figure out my career
22:56
so late in my twenties. And another thing that I was not expecting is
23:00
that when I was younger, I always had this vision that you know,
23:04
my bestest friends would be my high school friends, my college friends, we'd
23:08
be you know, friends till death, and that they'd be at my wedding,
23:12
they'd be my bridesmaids. All that absolutely not. That is not the
23:15
case. And you know what, it can be the case for certain people,
23:18
but from my own personal experience, I actually don't really talk to my
23:22
high school or college friends at all. Like I literally only talk to my
23:26
childhood best friends and that is it. And it's amazing how girls that I
23:30
met when I was like six or seven years old, like I never thought
23:33
that I would be speaking to those people to this day. And literally every
23:37
single one of my bridesmaids besides Trend and Land are people that I grew up
23:41
with since I was six years old. Trend and Land are two people that
23:44
I met through social media that I consider really good friends of mine now.
23:48
But that was something I wasn't expecting in my life. And you know,
23:51
sometimes you meet friends down the line, whether it's through your career or as
23:55
I said, like people that you've created friendships with since you were, you
23:57
know, six orven years old. You don't realize that you know, certain
24:03
friends stay, certain friends go, And that's okay. But mentally, I
24:08
just wasn't thinking that my childhood friends would be in my life to this day.
24:12
And I totally thought it'd be my high school and college friends. But
24:17
you know, that's the thing about your twenties is that things are surprising and
24:22
you know, unexpected, and that's okay. Another one is having your whole
24:26
life figured out, but you don't. I think I don't know what I
24:32
thought when I was sixteen or seventeen years older. I literally thought like I
24:34
would have my shit figured out at this point. And of course I definitely
24:38
feel better now than where I was five years ago, but I still wouldn't
24:44
say I have my whole life figured out. I wouldn't say anybody really has
24:45
their whole life figured out at twenty eight or in their twenties. I feel
24:49
like everything in your twenties is to be unexpected and to be evolving and always
24:56
changing and always growing, and that's okay, and I think for people who
25:02
are in their early twenties right now, is that know that it's okay if
25:06
you don't have your whole life figured out, because I don't, and I
25:08
think a lot of people can relate to that, And yeah, I think
25:11
you just mentally need to know that being in your twenties is a process.
25:15
It is a journey. It is going to allow you to grow and change
25:18
into the person that you're supposed to become, and to not be so hard
25:22
on yourself and just know that what's meant to be will be. This also
25:26
kind of reminds me of something that actually just happened to me yesterday. I
25:30
went into a dentist appointment that I haven't been to in fourteen years. Like
25:36
I haven't been to this specific dentist. It was my orthodontist. So the
25:40
last time I was in was getting braces, so that would have been when
25:44
I was like sixteen or seventeen years old. And I get there, they
25:48
pull up photos from twenty ten, in twenty twelve, so literally twelve to
25:53
thirteen years ago. Guys, I did not even recognize myself. I had
26:00
really emo makeup on, I had the big ass side bang, my hair
26:03
was like up to my shoulders, like literally a completely different person. And
26:08
at that point in my life, I would have never imagined to be where
26:12
I am today. And even like another tip to even talk about is like
26:17
the evolution of style, Like looking at the style I was dressing twelve to
26:22
fifteen years ago versus now, like you learn so much about your body,
26:27
you learn so much about your personality, Like you truly figure out what makes
26:33
you most confident in terms of like how should you should dress? And that
26:36
is something that I feel like I've learned a lot in my twenties is that
26:38
not every style is going to suit you, and not every outfit is going
26:42
to look amazing on you. You just need to figure out what makes you
26:45
feel most confident, what makes you feel most beautiful. And I feel like,
26:49
yeah, as you grow older, you kind of realize your style and
26:52
how you want to look and how you want to do your makeup and all
26:56
that. So I don't know, just looking back at those old photos versus
26:59
now, like I feel like I was so lost at that point in my
27:00
life because you don't know how to dress yourself when you're sixteen years seventeen,
27:06
to be honest, like you're just dressing the way everyone else is dressing.
27:08
Whereas now I feel like I dress for myself and I'm more confident when I
27:15
pick certain things for myself and all that, and I feel like it's it
27:18
takes time to learn how to style yourself. And I think a lot of
27:21
people still don't know how to dress their body types right because it is a
27:26
learning opportunity. And I don't know, there's some type of confidence that you
27:30
build once you start to realize how to dress yourself, and I don't know.
27:33
I think it's just important too. Yeah, see how you grow into
27:37
this new style. I feel like now I've definitely mastered my style, but
27:41
I wouldn't say it took, you know, a few months. It definitely
27:44
took a few years to really realize that. But I think that's something you
27:47
also learn in your twenties, is just how to dress to make yourself feel
27:51
more competent. And that's another tip, is just how much more confident you
27:53
are as you age in your twenties. Looking back at old k Lee versus
27:59
now, I think when you're younger, you just compare yourself to other people
28:03
so much, and I feel like the older you get, the more,
28:06
you realize you feel so much more confident in your own skin. You love
28:10
who you've become. You feel so much more comfortable in your skin. You
28:12
don't have to please everybody. I think at the end of the day,
28:15
you just want to be happy with how you look and how you feel.
28:19
So yeah, I don't know. I just feel like I'm so much more
28:22
confident now than I ever thought I would be verse, you know, twelve
28:27
years ago. Another one is just realizing how much you appreciate the little things
28:32
like being healthy, being active, cooking home cooked meals. Like when I
28:34
was in my early twenties, I had no idea how to cook for myself.
28:37
Like that is something that I developed over time, developing new skills,
28:42
really just adapting to a new lifestyle by having to cook for myself and you
28:45
know, figure out recipes and all that. Like that was something that took
28:48
time and I learned over time. But I feel like that's something that people
28:52
don't really appreciate. You look at yourself at sixteen or seventeen years old,
28:55
you probably would never been able to cook the meals that you cook now.
28:57
And that's something that I because I learned and developed and grown as a person
29:03
to be able to cook for myself. So I think people need to realize
29:07
how much they appreciate the little things. And I was actually speaking to my
29:10
mom about this, and she's like, even in her fifties, like she's
29:12
realizing little things that she appreciates so much now versus when she was, you
29:18
know, in her thirties or in her twenties. And I think it's important
29:21
just to appreciate those little things. Another thing is just your relationship with the
29:26
person that you have, whether you've been with that person for two years,
29:29
one year, twelve years, whatever the case may be. I think over
29:33
time, your relationship becomes more meaningful and you can actually talk about future plans
29:40
with the person, And in your twenties, I think that's something that people
29:42
still try and figure out, right, Like there's some people that don't find
29:45
their person until their thirties, and that's okay, But I don't think you
29:49
really see the future until you've actually created that long term relationship with that person
29:56
and actually talk about where you see each other. So for Zach and I
29:59
situation, and obviously when we started dating at seventeen eighteen, we weren't talking
30:03
about marriage at that point At that point, I was like, is this
30:06
a thing? Is it just a short term thing? Like I didn't know
30:08
where the relationship was really going. But we grew together and we didn't really
30:11
talk about a future together until we were in our early twenties, and then
30:15
we started to realize, okay, shit, our relationships getting serious, like
30:19
we should probably talk about like do we want to get married, do we
30:22
want to have kids? Do we have the same you know, plans and
30:26
goals for our future together. And that's important to have because there's some people
30:30
that you know don't want to have kids or don't want to get married,
30:33
and obviously if that doesn't align with each other, then the relationship probably will
30:37
not work out. Right, So you grow so much in a relationship to
30:40
really see if that person is for you. And I think I wasn't really
30:44
expecting to a be with the same person when we were sixteen or seventeen,
30:48
But now being in our twenties and being able to plan our future together and
30:52
now actually see things happening, I feel like you just get more and more
30:56
comfortable in the relationship and you can talk yeah, more future goals with each
31:00
other. So all in all, like obviously you just gain more depth in
31:04
the relationship when you're in your twenties, and sometimes with the same person from
31:10
high school. Sometimes it isn't Sometimes it's just with someone that you weren't expecting.
31:14
And yeah, but it's nice to be able to have those goals with
31:18
that person. But know that it's okay if you still don't have that person
31:22
in your twenties, because as I said, sometimes it happens in your thirties,
31:26
your forties, like at the end of the day, like you will
31:29
know when it's the right person. Okay. Last thing that I want to
31:33
talk about when it comes to things that I wasn't expecting in my twenties is
31:37
there's no perfect time for anything, And I think that just goes with a
31:41
lot of the points I even talked about, just like, you know,
31:45
not knowing when I was going to have my career change or just my actual
31:49
dream career in general, not knowing when I was going to get engaged,
31:53
or when I was going to take the next step in our relationship in terms
31:56
of marriage and buying a house and all that. Like, there is so
31:59
much much that I've learned and grown through my twenties and just things that I
32:06
wasn't you know, still trying to figure out. I still was developing skills,
32:09
learning skills, and I am still learning and I am still growing.
32:12
And I think at the end of the day, people need to realize that
32:15
you know what you can. You can consider yourself an adult in your twenties,
32:19
but you're not fully feeling like an adult yet, and that's okay.
32:22
You can lean on people for support, and you can lean on people for
32:25
support for as many years as you want after your twenties, Like it's okay
32:29
to feel that way, because I think that's the reality of being in your
32:31
twenties. You're supposed to be learning, You're supposed to be just figuring shit
32:36
out, still navigating, And I think at the end of the day,
32:39
just go with the flow and just do things that you want to do for
32:44
yourself at any point in your life. If you feel like you want to
32:45
get married at twenty four and you're with the right person, do it.
32:49
If you feel like you, you know, want to become a dentist and
32:52
you just wanted your dentist school at the age of twenty six, do it.
32:54
Who cares If you're twenty six and you you know, haven't even started
32:58
dentist school or anything like that, and you still have a eleven or twelve
33:00
years after that. Who cares. If that's what you want to do,
33:02
just do it. So it's okay to figure out things later in your twenties.
33:06
There is no time limit, there is no perfect timing for anything.
33:09
Just do what makes you happy and do it at any point in your life.
33:14
There's no timeline, there's no commitment or anything. At the end of
33:19
the day, you are going on your own path. You were going on
33:21
your own journey, and you just got to do what feels good at the
33:24
right times, if that makes sense. So that is just for me,
33:29
my own personal experience in terms of things I didn't expect in my twenties,
33:31
my advice going into this journey that you're experiencing. At the end of the
33:37
day, everybody has their own journey. Everyone's different. But these are things
33:39
that I just didn't expect. But you know, I'm still learning, I'm
33:44
still growing, and I'm very proud of the woman that I've become in my
33:49
twenties, and I'm just excited to see these last two years of my twenties
33:53
and where my thirties take me and where my future is when I'm in my
33:58
thirties. So I hope that was a fun episode to listen to, and
34:01
this was a learning opportunity for you that if you're feeling alone or scared,
34:07
or you don't know what to do with your life, just know that your
34:09
twenties is supposed to be a journey and you're supposed to learn and grow from
34:14
mistakes, and the right things will come at the right time and you'll just
34:19
know it. So that's my best advice that I could give for being in
34:22
your twenties. But I hope you guys enjoyed this episode. I love you
34:27
all so much. If you're new, definitely make sure to follow the host
34:30
Kailey, which is me. You can follow my social media platforms down below.
34:34
You can also follow are at the hawkrel Energy Podcast Instagram. There's my
34:37
voice crack. I try and post stories keep you guys updated on episodes that
34:43
are happening within the week. But I love you guys also much. Thank
34:45
you again for downloading this episode and I will see you guys next week.