Latest / HAVE FAITH LET IT BEGIN® / Personal Testimonies : A Heartfelt Journey We have a Heart Chapter 2 Ep 2

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Personal Testimonies : A Heartfelt Journey We have a Heart Chapter 2 Ep 2 · HAVE FAITH LET IT BEGIN®

• 0:00
  Music.
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  Let it begin, and Endless Hope, Inc. presents a new series entitled Personal Testimonies.
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  Here is your host, Angel Santana, and special co-host, Clinton Knapp.
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  Music.
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  Welcome, everyone, to another edition of Personal Testimony.
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  We left off with what number Clinton is going to be on the heart transplant list.
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  Clinton, welcome back. Doc, I know you're going to get started right where we left off.
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  I'm not going to keep these people in suspense because they waited almost a
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  week. Take it over, my friend.
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  All righty. So like I said, status seven, those people, chances of them needing
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  the transplant and getting one is like years out.
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  Then you have a status one. Status one is a patient who's in the hospital,
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  deathly ill, needs a transplant like immediately.
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  So those people, top of the list. number one, number two, number three, stuff like that.
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  As for me, I can't give you a number of where I was on the list.
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  I can tell you my status. I was a status four.
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  So being a status four, I was healthy enough to come home, healthy enough to
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  live every day with my wife, my two kids, my family, get up,
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  go to work, just like any other normal body being does.
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  I worked at five to one.
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  I get up at three o'clock in the morning, get dressed, showered,
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  coffee, out the door at four o'clock, 5 a.m. I'm at work, 1 p.m. I'm home.
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  I mean, I'm off, two o'clock, I'm home, home duties, being a dad, being a husband.
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  But how do you do that? I have to, I'm sorry to stop you, but I have to ask
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  you, how do you do that with knowing in the back of your mind,
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  you have this blockage you're on this list how can you do that because i have to say so.
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  It goes back to I was in that dark space. Now, I have a really good friend.
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  I'll mention his name because I know he's not going to care.
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  I met him through, he's actually my wife's cousin's husband.
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  And me and him have been best friends through it all.
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  I met him, we've probably been friends now.
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  Got to be 17, no, 15, 16 years.
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  And this guy is, he's been my rock. Like, he picks me up when I'm down.
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  So Mike is his name,
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  And When I was starting When I was in that dark place I reached out to him And
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  he came by and he picked me up And we went out we had lunch and stuff like that
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  And we talked and he reminded me That even though I was in,
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  I was going through another Tragedy I was going to end up needing to be Retransplanted,
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  He reminded me of who I was He reminded me of how strong I was He reminded me
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  that I made it through the first one and came out a magnificent person,
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  a strong man, that I could do it again.
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  And I needed that. And he gave it to me.
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  And it reminded me quickly that when I got my first transplant, I was home in 22 days.
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  From day of hospitalization to day of home, 22 days. No, I'm sorry, 18 days.
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  So and when I came home my recovery was so quick
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  that people were like doctors the doctors were like
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  you're recovering so fast I've never seen a patient recover this fast like and
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  it was all based on at that point in time it was my son now it was I want to
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  live for me because I want to live to see my kids have kids I want to I want
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  to meet my grandkids I want to watch my baby girl I want to walk her down the aisle.
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  I want to watch my son get married, stuff like that.
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  So he helped bring me out of that dark space.
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  And now that I was out of it, I was able to see that,
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  I've already beat this disease once. Why can't I do it again?
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  I'm just as strong as I was before. I didn't feel any, even though I was battling
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  this disease, I didn't feel any different.
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  I didn't, like, I didn't wake up fatigued. I didn't, everything was,
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  everyday life was just everyday life as it's been for the last 13 and a half years.
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  So I just continued to do as I do.
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  And time went on. And my doctor's appointments became instead of yearly,
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  my catheterizations, they went every six months.
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  And every six months I would go and get checked and they would,
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  you know, oh, it's progressing a little bit. It's not progressing that much,
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  but everything looks good.
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  You're looking fine. You know, send me home.
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  So I just continued to live life, do things with my kids, my family, with me, enjoy it.
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  And that's what I did. And every six months it went on and went on and went on.
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  And then we came to the summer of 2023, which is a story that we're going to tell you later.
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  But 2023 was the summer of 2023 was rough for me. And it tested my faith and my strength again.
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  And I overcame that.
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  So then, you know, life went on with that situation. and.
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  2024 comes. And here we are.
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  It's beginning of the year. Everything looks good. I go in January for my catheterization,
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  which is every six months.
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  And my wife had spoken to my doctor because I had a habit of every so often
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  I would slip into a light depression, being scared, which is only normal.
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  I mean, when you're going through what I'm going through, and I don't take it from anybody,
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  whether you're going through something because you may have had a back surgery
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  a knee surgery or arm surgery or maybe you're having kidney surgery or whatever
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  it is you i'm sure you can understand and i i can definitely understand with you some.
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  Is every every so often i would get a little depressed but then i would pull
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  myself out of it no judgment and when i would i would i would remind sometimes
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  i would remind my wife not that she needed it but i would tell her you know
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  like i'm sick i'm slowly dying and she got tired of hearing it.
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  And I don't blame her because who wants to hear that all the time?
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  So she had said to the doctor that day, she's like, well, what's going on with it, man? Is he dying?
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  And she's like, well, he needs a transplant, but he's not dying.
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  So we came home and I vowed I wouldn't say it again because I knew how much
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  it bothered her and I didn't.
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  So now February comes and I work for New York State corrections.
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  So if any of you out there know, in the middle of February, February 17th to
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  be exact, CEOs all across New York State decided to go on strike.
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  Well, because of it, the rest of the people in the facility,
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  the rest of the facilities, the jail still has to run.
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  So a lot of us took a hit. So I work in food service and food service.
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  We were at that point When this happened, we were mandated 12-hour days, seven days a week.
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  So my boss pulled us in the office. He notified us.
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  At that point in time, I am a generous, generous human being.
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  I don't like to see people struggle.
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  I vowed that I would work seven days a week, five in the morning to nine o'clock at night.
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  And for, I can tell you right now, give me one second for.
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  Yeah, it went on for a while that, that strike. Yeah. And I work.
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  And I can vouch for this by the way Because I worked with his wife And I know
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  every time I would ask This is the reason why we actually Couldn't get our schedules
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  together Because as he's counting his days This is what he was doing,
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  But yeah This is crazy Sorry for that I'm filling in for you I worked 19 days straight,
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  19 days straight Not every day did I do 5am to 9pm Some days,
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  to keep myself balanced,
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  I would go in at six, seven One day I went in at nine But every day I was putting
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  in five plus hours of overtime I ended up doing total in that 18 days It was
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  like 150 hours of overtime,
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  Top of my regular eight hours.
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  So that brings us to, that was
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  February, it started 17 Brings us all the way to March 5th, I'm at work,
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  and now mind you let me explain this to you before I get to March 5th is I'm still a status four,
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  so a status four like I said I can go home I live at home I work I get up I do everything,
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  chances of me receiving a heart are like,
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  it's like 2% as a status four I'm not going to get it because I'm not sick enough,
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  I would have to be hospitalized,
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  to be, to qualify to receive a heart before a heart would be offered to me,
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  not to receive it or qualify because I already qualify.
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  So, but before a heart would be offered to me, I would have to be hospitalized.
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  Which we had spoke about because there was routes that we could take that wouldn't
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  break any rules or anything.
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  But there was things that could happen as long as I agreed to them that we could
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  move me up the list, but I would have to be, again, it would hospitalize me.
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  But I chose, the doctors agreed and said as long as I felt like I could do it, that I could do it.
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  And that's what I did. So I decided to stay home. I didn't want to take from
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  anybody else who needed more than I did because at that time I didn't feel like I needed it that bad.
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  So March 5th, I go to work. That day I went in at 9.
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  I went in at 9. I'm working, busting my butt.
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  We got a bunch of volunteers helping us from other departments in the prison
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  because obviously we still have to feed the incarcerated individuals.
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  And we have a count. Our census was like 518.
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  So you got to feed 518 people three times a day.
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  And usually how it works is they come, they're programmed to the mess hall and
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  they come down and cook. But because we're on a lockdown, they're not allowed to leave their blocks.
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  So they stay all in their housing units. So it's just us doing it.
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  So we got volunteers from other areas to come and help us.
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  So, and everybody was working really hard. So I want to say it was about five
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  o'clock and we were all out in the dining room and I told everybody to take a break.
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  We were sitting down and we were taking a few minute break before we started
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  to prep the breakfast trays and load them into carts and stuff like that.
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  And at this point in time, we have to feed National Guard, who is now in the
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  prison to help us, to help what COs are there doing their jobs.
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  And stuff like that. So we have to feed two sets of them. Then we have to feed.
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  No, I think this, I think at the time the cert was deactivated.
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  So we weren't feeding them.
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  So we all sat down and take a few minute break. I said, let's take 10, 15 minutes break.
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  Right. At which time there's a phone in the middle of the mess hall,
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  not in the middle, but on the back wall between the two seating sides.
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  And it rang and an officer had answered it. He was like, we go by last name. So he's like, yo, nap.
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  I'm like, what's up? He's like, phone. So I'm like, all right.
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  I go over. I pick up the phone.
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  It's another officer, the officer who was doing operator. And he says to me,
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  Nap, you know, so-and-so, I won't mention the doctor's name.
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  He's a so-and-so from Westchester Medical called, and they wanted to speak with you.
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  You want to call him back now or you want to call him back later?
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  I said, I'll just call. I'll call when I get home. You know what I mean?
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  It's no big deal. I'm not worried about it.
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  So he says to me, I don't know why.
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  He says to me go to your office call me back and i'll patch you
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  through so instead of saying no no no i'll do it again later something just
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  told me yeah yeah yeah i'll go i'll call you back in a minute so i go to my
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  office i call him back he patches me through and it's one of the nurse practitioners
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  that works with me from westchester and she verifies that it's me she's speaking to,
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  and she says we have
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  a heart available for you and i kind of like
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  froze for a second i was like excuse me she's like
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  we have a heart available for you she says how long can
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  it take you to get here and i'm like well i work here i
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  gotta go home i said about two hours i was shocked because as i just told you
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  chances of me receiving this phone call are slim to none it's not supposed to
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  happen this heart should go to so many other people before it goes to me.
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  So I'm like, all right, I hang up the phone. I grab my bag, my hoodie. I go out.
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  I tell my coworker, and he was like, mind blown. He's like, dude,
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  go ahead, get out of here.
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  Be safe. You know, I'll pray for you. You know, and everybody is justice.
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  And it was, it all happened so fast that you're not supposed to.
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  We don't give incarcerated individuals certain information because of who they
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  are, where they are, and who we are, where we, it's just, you just don't do it.
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  But because of the situation, everything was moving so fast,
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  yet so slow, that when I said it to my co-worker, it didn't.
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  But I have to say, not to stray from the subject too much or too quick,
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  but I need to say this, is people have, a lot of people have a bad outlook when
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  it comes to incarcerated individuals.
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  But I have to say, I work with five, I work in a prison with 518 of them.
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  I work with 60 different incarcerated individuals every day.
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  They all have different personalities. They're all in jail for different reasons.
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  And I treat them all like men and humans. And because of that,
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  on my way out, every one of them looked at me and was like, Nap,
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  we're praying for you. Nap, get better.
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  Nap, you got to come back. We need you back here. You can't.
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  Don't let this beat you. You got this. You're strong.
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  Like, you're one of the strongest individuals we know. and you're talking about
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  guys who are in jail for murder.
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  You know, I got guys who work for me who have been in prison for 27 years plus and these guys are like,
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  you got gangsters, you got all different types of people from all different
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  walks of life and they're all like, Nap, you got this. Stay strong.
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  So I walk out the kitchen and I tell an officer because obviously we're on lockdown
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  until the officer escorted to, sorry about that.
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  My alarm for my medication, but it's all right. I usually take it at like 6.30.
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  Have to be escorted through the building. So I get an officer to escort me and,
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  you know, obviously he knows what's going on. So we're talking about it.
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  I get up to the front door and the sergeant is like, where are you going?
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  Like, you don't normally leave till nine o'clock. What's going on here?
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  And I looked at him and I said, well, Sarge, I have news.
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  I said, I'll see you in six months. And he's like, what? I said,
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  I just got a phone call and he's standing there with the captain.
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  And I'm like, I just received a phone call. They have a heart for me.
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  I have to leave. I have to go to Westchester so I can have my heart transplant tonight.
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  And he's like, get the heck out of here. No way. And I'm like,
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  Sarge, I'm going to have a heart transplant right now.
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  And the captain is like, at the time, the superintendent, which most people,
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  you know, look at as the warden, is in his office still.
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  So the captain's like, says to the sergeant, let's go. Come on,
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  nap. You got to come with us real quick.
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  And they take me into the superintendent's office. And they're like,
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  boss, you know, this young man here is leaving us tonight. to have a heart transplant.
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  And he's like, no, I didn't know that. And I was like, well, I just found out.
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  So I was trying to, you know, I'm trying to let as many people know as I can
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  on my way out. You know, and we spoke for a minute and they all told me they're praying for me.
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  They want me to get better. They can't wait for me to come back to work and stuff like that.
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  So I get out to the car. It's raining. It's a little foggy. Now I told the nurse
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  that I would be there in two hours.
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  I probably, it probably took like three and a half.
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  And I have to be honest, I don't even remember the drive home.
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  Like, I don't remember seeing anything except for rain and fog.
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  Like, I don't remember seeing the road, nothing. It was just, everything was a blur.
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  I remember getting in my car, and then the next thing I know, I'm home.
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  And, I mean, I've made some phone calls, let some family members know,
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  called my wife and stuff like that.
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  I get home. I was in work clothes, so I showered really quick because I had prison all over me.
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  So I showered really quick, and then we got in the car. We left.
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  We got down to Westchester. I went through the emergency room. They admitted me.
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  They put me in a room, and I stayed there until about 2.30 a.m.
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  At 2.30, they said they were ready for me, and they came, and they took me and the family.
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  And at that point in time, it was me, my wife, my two kids, my mother-in-law,
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  my sister-in-law, two aunts, my mother, my sister, my brother-in-law.
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  No, my brother-in-law was out in the car with the two young ones because my sister has two babies.
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  And they allowed them to walk with me all the way. So from what I remember,
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  last time, it was a certain point.
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  And they said, OK, this is where you say goodbye. And at that point,
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  I said goodbye to my mother and my father and my wife.
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  This time, the nurses and the doctors were so accommodating that they allowed
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  my wife and all of these people, had to be 20 people,
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  into the surgical area where I waited to be just wheeled through two doors and
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  into an operating room, which was weird.
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  It was strange. That is not supposed to happen. And the nurses,
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  there was two nurses. I won't mention their names. They were great.
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  Like they started gathering chairs, gave everybody chairs, gave everybody warm blankets.
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  And it was just so, I literally felt like I was home.
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  Like, and still, I don't know if it was from the shock or everything that was going on.
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  I wasn't worried. Like I wasn't scared.
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  I was just laying there. We were all talking and stuff like that.
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  The surgeon came out. We got to meet with the surgeon who was going to do the transplant.
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  And he was sure that everything was going to be good. Everything was going to be great.
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  And I sat there for probably about 15, 20 minutes. And then they wheeled me
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  into the operating room. And that is where we're going to stop.
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  But we want to backtrack and leave you on this note.
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  There was a text message that I received on that night. And it was from Clinton.
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  And Clinton asked me to pray for him.
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  I was at home And I just Was in a daze in a fog Because I too like the listener
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  And his friend And you know Co-worker here on this podcast And this project,
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  You don't know what you do When you have somebody you care about That you know
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  have gone through so much Tell you That you need prayer Because you're about
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  to get your heart So I did know So I didn't pick up the text right away.
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  So I texted him back a prayer because I didn't think I had the time to call
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  him. And I certainly didn't want to be a distraction.
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  And that's where we left off. And at that point, it was me communicating with
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  his wife to find out how he was doing.
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  All of you out there, we are in chapter two. We failed to mention that,
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  but that's because we're not all about trying to come up with titles to click bait.
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  We're not all about trying to make any type of revenue from this.
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  This is a story that needs to be told.
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  Absolutely. So chapter two is what we're in.
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  There's so much more that we have to fill into to all of you,
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  that has happened in between all this that we were supposed to talk about.
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  But this is a story that took precedent because we have so much more to share
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  with you that you have no idea we're going to go down what path.
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  But I have to leave you here and we will be back because there's so much more
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  to ask Clinton, which is we didn't even know where his faith was in between all this.
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  You see, while he's telling you this story, he was in a dark place.
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  And then all of a sudden, we shift over to this part where he's getting another transplant.
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  He's on a list. We failed to bring up the most important part, but we did it on purpose.
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  Where was his faith? What got his faith back on track? And that's where we're
• 21:18
  going to come back next week and then continue on.
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  With obviously, we know that the transplant was successful because he's here
• 21:26
  now. But we're still going to tell you the meet and greet, all the ingredients that's in between.
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  Because Clinton is so fresh off of this journey that he's got so much more to tell.
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  We will see you next week. There's just more to tell. I'm a loss for words.
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  God bless you. We'll see you next week.
• 21:46
  Hey, Have Faith family. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share the podcast with your friends.
• 21:51
  Visit our website, havefaithletitbegin.com.
• 21:55
  Music.