Latest / Divas That Care Network / All Things Bliss

Transcript

All Things Bliss · Divas That Care Network

• 0:00
  SPEAKER_00: It's Divas That Care Radio.
• 0:02
  SPEAKER_00: Stories, strategies, and ideas to inspire positive change.
• 0:06
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Divas That Care, a network of women committed to making our world a better place for everyone.
• 0:13
  SPEAKER_00: This is a global movement for women, by women, engaged in a collaborative effort to create a better world for future generations.
• 0:21
  SPEAKER_00: To find out more about the movement, visit DivasThatCare.com after the show.
• 0:26
  SPEAKER_00: Right now, though, stay tuned for another jolt of inspiration.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_01: We all seem to have that inner critic inside our heads.
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_01: I have a committee, the Itty Bitty Shitty Committee.
• 0:38
  SPEAKER_01: You know what I mean, that nagging voice or voices in my case that knocks us down and drags us down the road of self-sabotage and self-neglect.
• 0:47
  SPEAKER_01: A strong, positive sense of self-esteem is your first step to anything you wish to accomplish.
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_01: Discover who you truly are, that gorgeous, talented, fabulous woman who deserves recognition and unconditional love.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_01: You know the most beautiful thing any woman can wear is confidence.
• 1:04
  SPEAKER_01: Here on Confidence in Bloom with the Divas at Care Network, I, Tina Spoletini, speak with women living in their own self-confidence about who they truly are, how they found themselves, and how they care for themselves.
• 1:16
  SPEAKER_01: Today I'm speaking with Katerina Randall.
• 1:19
  SPEAKER_01: Katerina is a best-selling author, podcaster, and women's business mentor who passionately serves women on a mission.
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: She shows women how to be loud and proud about the value they bring in order to serve more people and make their businesses thrive.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: Her books include Learn to Think Differently, released in over 13 countries and several languages.
• 1:43
  SPEAKER_01: A Woman's Guide to Starting a Giving Circle, and her latest book, The ABCs of Public Speaking, which quickly hit number one in four Amazon bestseller categories.
• 1:54
  SPEAKER_01: Katerina is also the founder of the Thriving Women in Business Center in San Francisco.
• 2:02
  SPEAKER_01: Welcome, Katerina.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: How are you?
• 2:04
  SPEAKER_01: Tina, I am fabulous and so happy to be with you.
• 2:10
  SPEAKER_01: Awesome, awesome.
• 2:11
  SPEAKER_01: I'm so happy to hear that.
• 2:13
  SPEAKER_01: Tell me a little bit more about yourself.
• 2:16
  SPEAKER_02: Wow.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_02: Okay.
• 2:18
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I live in San Francisco.
• 2:19
  SPEAKER_02: I'm an Italian-American.
• 2:21
  SPEAKER_02: I'm second-generation American.
• 2:24
  SPEAKER_02: My grandparents came through Ellis Island.
• 2:26
  SPEAKER_02: And I love helping women grow and thrive and bliss in their businesses.
• 2:33
  UNKNOWN: Okay.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: I want to know what gave you that passion.
• 2:42
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what made you want to help women?
• 2:46
  SPEAKER_02: Well, my first business was I owned a cafe and catering business.
• 2:52
  SPEAKER_02: And I loved the people part of it.
• 2:55
  SPEAKER_02: I loved chatting with my customers all day long and connecting with them.
• 3:00
  SPEAKER_02: But I didn't like...
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_02: The topping and the blanching and the slicing and the dicing that went along with the food business.
• 3:10
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm trying to figure out what I want to do with my life.
• 3:13
  SPEAKER_02: And this lady comes in my cafe and she thanks me for some advice that I had given her.
• 3:19
  SPEAKER_02: And she said what a huge difference it made for her.
• 3:22
  SPEAKER_02: And her gratitude literally touched my heart.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_02: I felt a pang of bliss in my chest.
• 3:30
  SPEAKER_02: And I said, this is what I'm going to do with my life.
• 3:32
  SPEAKER_02: And also because I'm born on International Women's Day, which is March 8th, and that always made me feel like I wanted to use my life to uplift women.
• 3:46
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 3:47
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 3:48
  SPEAKER_01: I know that I've taken a few of your workshops, and I did a retreat with you last month, and it's women.
• 3:56
  SPEAKER_01: I have yet to see men join your group.
• 4:00
  SPEAKER_01: Do you get men that come and join your groups, or do you aim mainly at women?
• 4:05
  SPEAKER_02: We only focus on women, and the reason for that is there's a different vibe in the room when it's just women.
• 4:14
  SPEAKER_02: Plus, as you know, Tina...
• 4:16
  SPEAKER_02: I like to give the ladies crowns and fascinators and satin capes.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_02: And we do a lot of things that would qualify as feminine.
• 4:26
  SPEAKER_02: And that's another part of it too.
• 4:28
  SPEAKER_02: The thing is that women love to connect and women thrive in community.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_02: And they particularly thrive when they're among women.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_02: And that's another reason why.
• 4:40
  SPEAKER_02: And also it's my mission.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_02: That's my mission.
• 4:44
  SPEAKER_02: And I have my own business.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_02: So I get to do it any way I want, and that's my preference.
• 4:51
  SPEAKER_01: I like that.
• 4:52
  SPEAKER_01: You know, that's important.
• 4:53
  SPEAKER_01: We get to do it the way we want to, right?
• 4:56
  SPEAKER_01: You get to do it the way you want.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 4:59
  SPEAKER_01: That's awesome.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_01: So, okay, so with women, do you find that you're answering a lot of questions they don't know they have?
• 5:13
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 5:14
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes you don't know what you don't know and you don't know the questions to ask.
• 5:18
  SPEAKER_02: And the other thing, Tina, I'll say is women sell differently, women buy differently, and women do business differently.
• 5:29
  SPEAKER_02: And sometimes there's a lot of experts telling women how they should do things that don't feel authentic to them.
• 5:38
  SPEAKER_02: No woman wants to ever be salesy.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_02: Women generally have an intention to be kind.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_02: And oftentimes when we think of business and we think of sales, it's really all these metaphors for war and sports.
• 5:55
  SPEAKER_02: And women would rather make friends and see who's a good match for them and do it that way.
• 6:02
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 6:05
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 6:07
  SPEAKER_01: And so do you, like I hate to use the word soft, but do you think that women, so I think the word sales.
• 6:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I don't know how to word it.
• 6:19
  SPEAKER_01: Because I know myself, I don't like sales.
• 6:23
  SPEAKER_01: I don't like saying to someone, come work with me, right?
• 6:27
  SPEAKER_01: Well, here's the thing.
• 6:28
  SPEAKER_01: Is that soft?
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, I never say to anybody.
• 6:33
  SPEAKER_02: Well, no, here's the thing.
• 6:36
  SPEAKER_02: I never say to anybody, come work with me.
• 6:38
  SPEAKER_02: I say, would you like to hear about how to work with me?
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_02: Or would you like to hear about how I work with my clients?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_02: Or would you like to hear about this program that I think would be a great match for you?
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_02: It's all about the questions.
• 6:53
  SPEAKER_02: But the thing is too, Tina, the reason I have to call it sales is so we know what we're talking about.
• 6:59
  SPEAKER_02: But it's really talking to people and seeing if they're a good match for you And also for you to see if you vibe with them.
• 7:08
  SPEAKER_02: And one of the things that you hear a lot about sales is you have to build influence and then you ask people to buy.
• 7:14
  SPEAKER_02: For women, it's a little bit more than that.
• 7:16
  SPEAKER_02: Yes, you have to build influence, but you also have to build rapport.
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_02: And you also have to communicate that you genuinely care.
• 7:25
  SPEAKER_02: And I don't think caring is soft.
• 7:29
  SPEAKER_02: I think caring is exactly what people want.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_02: They want somebody that doesn't just want to take their money.
• 7:35
  SPEAKER_02: They want someone who genuinely cares about making a difference for them in whatever area, their health, their style, their home, whatever it is.
• 7:46
  SPEAKER_02: And you've probably heard me say I like to wear my heart all over my business.
• 7:52
  SPEAKER_02: I encourage all of my clients to do that.
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_02: And the reason is that that is the genuine caring that people are looking for.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_02: We want people in our life that we know genuinely care about making a difference for us.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 8:09
  SPEAKER_01: And I guess, I mean, it comes down to the whole know, like, and trust factor, right?
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_01: If you don't come across as genuine and authentic, other women are not going to trust you.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_02: Right.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 8:24
  SPEAKER_02: And that's why...
• 8:25
  SPEAKER_02: It's very important to take time to get to know people.
• 8:29
  SPEAKER_02: It's not like, hey, here's my business card, hire me.
• 8:32
  SPEAKER_02: No, it's more taking time to connect with people, get to know them, and have them get to know you.
• 8:41
  SPEAKER_02: And then there's a consideration where they're considering working with you.
• 8:46
  SPEAKER_02: There's that time.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_02: And then there's the actual conversation to see if they're ready to get started.
• 8:53
  SPEAKER_02: It doesn't usually happen in one conversation.
• 8:56
  SPEAKER_02: Now, sometimes it does.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes we gain what I like to call Insta clients.
• 9:01
  SPEAKER_02: The challenge is that a lot of people are just looking for Insta clients, and they're missing all those people that would work with you if you took some time to cultivate that relationship, build trust, build rapport, circle back, follow up.
• 9:18
  SPEAKER_02: As you know, Tina, women have very full plates.
• 9:22
  SPEAKER_02: And as a result of that, they often think they want to, you know, hey, I want to do this, I want to talk to her, but they're not getting to it.
• 9:30
  SPEAKER_02: And that's why it's on us, easy for people to connect with us and continue to invite them to connect.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_01: Right, right, exactly, exactly.
• 9:40
  SPEAKER_01: Like women, I mean, I think as women, we put too much on our plate.
• 9:44
  SPEAKER_01: Like we...
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_01: You know, we want to help other people.
• 9:47
  SPEAKER_01: We want to see other people doing well.
• 9:50
  SPEAKER_01: So, oh, here, give that to me.
• 9:51
  SPEAKER_01: I'll look after that for you, right, so you can have time to go do that, right?
• 9:56
  SPEAKER_01: I know I find myself doing that.
• 9:59
  SPEAKER_01: You know, with my kids especially, but, I mean, like I want to help everyone.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_01: I want, you know, oh, I wish I could do that for you so that you could go focus on that.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_01: I catch myself with, you know, especially with my friends, like, well, let me do that for you.
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_01: And I have to stop myself because I think it's almost like a boundary that we have to learn how to set for ourselves.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_01: I have too much on my plate.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_01: I need to find a way.
• 10:26
  SPEAKER_01: I can't delegate.
• 10:29
  SPEAKER_01: If I'm going to commit myself, I don't want to delegate.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: Because then I might as well just ask, do you mind doing that?
• 10:35
  SPEAKER_01: So I think I've been catching myself going, okay, if she's taking this on, I have to stop myself.
• 10:41
  SPEAKER_01: I'm not going to help her because she took it on.
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: She wants to be the one to do it.
• 10:46
  SPEAKER_01: Do you find that a lot with women and their businesses?
• 10:49
  SPEAKER_01: Do you find that they take on so much and then they're overwhelmed and they're like, oh, my gosh, I can't do this anymore.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_01: Somebody needs to help me.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_01: Well, yes, absolutely.
• 11:00
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 11:01
  SPEAKER_02: Yes is the short answer.
• 11:03
  SPEAKER_02: And here's the thing.
• 11:04
  SPEAKER_02: We all, Tina, have to create support in our life.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_02: It's very challenging to have a family and a business and run a household and have time for girlfriends when you're doing everything yourself.
• 11:20
  SPEAKER_02: And one of the things in business particularly is to look at what's the highest and best use of your time.
• 11:26
  SPEAKER_02: And really doing the speaking and anything that's like more of a spokesperson thing, the one who's the face of the business.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_02: Then there's, of course, the selling unless you have a sales team, but most people don't, at least in the early years.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_02: And the serving of the clients, you're probably doing that.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_02: And then the strategy, the goal setting, the action planning, the scheduling.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_02: That's really your job.
• 11:53
  SPEAKER_02: And then, of course, self-care.
• 11:55
  SPEAKER_02: And because if you have no vitality, You certainly can't thrive in your business or your relationships.
• 12:00
  SPEAKER_02: And so those are five big jobs that women have.
• 12:03
  SPEAKER_02: And the mistake that often is made is that they are taking on six, seven, eight, nine, ten, twelve other jobs.
• 12:12
  SPEAKER_02: And as a result, nothing is being done excellently.
• 12:16
  SPEAKER_02: But also, the more you push off attention to these five things that really not only do you have to do, you want to master them in business, you want to master them, then in those cases, it's really important for you to create support.
• 12:36
  SPEAKER_02: And look at all those things you're doing that you're not excellent at.
• 12:40
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not excellent at bookkeeping.
• 12:42
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not excellent at web design.
• 12:45
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not excellent at podcast editing.
• 12:47
  SPEAKER_02: I'm not excellent at those things.
• 12:49
  SPEAKER_02: And if I try to do them, I'm going to take forever.
• 12:52
  SPEAKER_02: I'm going to struggle.
• 12:53
  SPEAKER_02: I'm going to be frustrated.
• 12:55
  SPEAKER_02: Rather than taking some of my resources and having someone who's already an expert at it do it, they're going to do it faster, they're going to do it more effectively, and all it's going to cost me is a little money.
• 13:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so that's what I want to encourage women to do in their lives.
• 13:12
  SPEAKER_02: Now that's business, personally too.
• 13:14
  SPEAKER_02: No woman who has a business should also be cleaning her own house.
• 13:20
  SPEAKER_02: It's not good use of her time.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_02: Take a little resources.
• 13:24
  SPEAKER_02: Get an expert.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_02: When the ladies come and clean my house, I am so blushing, Tina, when they leave.
• 13:30
  SPEAKER_02: And you know what?
• 13:31
  SPEAKER_02: They do it way better than me.
• 13:33
  SPEAKER_02: They do it faster than me.
• 13:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I'm not depresso like I would be if I was doing it myself.
• 13:41
  SPEAKER_02: That's one example.
• 13:42
  SPEAKER_02: And all these other things women need support with.
• 13:50
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 13:51
  SPEAKER_01: I totally agree.
• 13:54
  SPEAKER_01: Now, when it comes to cleaning my house, sometimes I'm like, no one's going to do it the way I want to do it.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_02: Well, my friend, well, that's where you want to communicate with your cleaning crew and tell them exactly how you want it because otherwise you're really taking a lot of your VIP time.
• 14:14
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, the other thing is from a strategy perspective is I'll take the gal who does the bookkeeping.
• 14:20
  SPEAKER_02: The bookkeeping gal costs$40 an hour.
• 14:23
  SPEAKER_02: You as a stylist, a consultant, educator, you're getting paid a lot more.
• 14:31
  SPEAKER_02: And so you're taking your super elite time, and I don't mean you, I mean any woman, we're taking our elite time and we're spending time doing things that we could hire someone to do very inexpensively.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_02: And sometimes people say, well, Katarina, I don't have the resources for that.
• 14:53
  SPEAKER_02: Well, the answer to that is get more masterful at your selling.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_02: Because most of the time, selling is what suffers.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_02: And as a result of not selling, you're not very good at it.
• 15:04
  SPEAKER_02: And so you're not efficient or effective.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_02: As a result, yeah, you don't have resources.
• 15:11
  SPEAKER_02: And that's why mastering selling Selling is so important.
• 15:15
  SPEAKER_02: But the thing is, when people think of selling, they think of just a conversation.
• 15:20
  SPEAKER_02: It's also the follow-up and the circlebacks and the influence building.
• 15:25
  SPEAKER_02: And Tina, you know I love workshops because you can build influence with a lot of people at once.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_02: So all of these things are important for us to thrive and bliss in our businesses and our lives.
• 15:38
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 15:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I totally agree.
• 15:41
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 15:43
  SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, like, sales is not, it doesn't have to be, like, a negative thing.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_01: It doesn't have to feel, like, you know, kind of slimy.
• 15:53
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we've been selling to our family and, like, our brothers, our sisters, our children always, right?
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, you never wake up, you know, your kids never wake up in the morning and they just do what you want to do, right?
• 16:06
  SPEAKER_01: You have to sell to them, right?
• 16:08
  SPEAKER_01: You have to sell them what you want them to do, right?
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: right, whether it's, you know, cleaning up their room or reading a book or, you know, like you have to sort of– I don't want to use the word convince because I think that that's a little bit on the negative side.
• 16:25
  SPEAKER_01: But you sort of have to, you know, in order for them to do or say what you want them to say, you have to know how to word your words or express yourself in a way that they understand, right?
• 16:41
  SPEAKER_01: and will give you what you want, right?
• 16:45
  SPEAKER_01: Well, and all that takes time
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_02: and a lot of practice.
• 16:49
  SPEAKER_02: And when I say practice, I don't mean practice in front of the mirror.
• 16:53
  SPEAKER_02: I mean practice in real situations with real people.
• 16:57
  SPEAKER_02: And the more we do all of these things, really the more masterful we get.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_02: And Malcolm Gladwell said in his book, Outliers, that mastery takes 10,000 hours, right?
• 17:08
  SPEAKER_02: Now, I think that is a very depressing number, 10,000 hours.
• 17:11
  SPEAKER_02: But the thing to know is that every hour in is an hour closer to mastery.
• 17:17
  SPEAKER_02: And oftentimes people are not willing to do things that they're not good at to get to the place where they are good at them.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what we really have to remind ourselves is, yes, I don't love this yet, but the more I do it, the more I'm going to get good at it and the more I'm going to love it.
• 17:39
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, and that, I mean, it totally makes sense, right?
• 17:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, so next is sales.
• 17:47
  SPEAKER_01: I would think sales is a big issue with women, right?
• 17:50
  SPEAKER_01: Just because I am a woman and I know that I have a difficult time with that.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_01: But is there anything else that you have women working with you that they're struggling with that's sort of like a big issue that's like kind of a common issue?
• 18:05
  SPEAKER_02: Well, you know, Tina, that I love public speaking.
• 18:09
  SPEAKER_02: And a lot of women struggle with public speaking.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_02: I think that people are recognizing more and more the value of it for business and for life, really.
• 18:19
  SPEAKER_02: We want to get really good at public speaking, speaking to a group of people.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_02: The reason is we can't meet with everybody all the time one-on-one.
• 18:33
  SPEAKER_02: There's only so many hours in the day.
• 18:35
  SPEAKER_02: And so running groups...
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_02: leading groups, using workshops and public speaking to meet new people and connect with them and share our wisdom is very helpful for business.
• 18:50
  SPEAKER_02: So that's the other thing I work with a lot of women on is how to use public speaking to connect with people, to build influence, and ultimately get clients.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so when you say speaking, you don't necessarily mean getting up in front of a room, whether it's virtual or live, and like reciting a speech.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_01: You're saying even like when you do your workshops or you do like a Facebook Live or something like that, you consider speaking all of that the same?
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_02: Well, but I wouldn't necessarily say it's the same.
• 19:31
  SPEAKER_02: Facebook Lives are great.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_02: They allow people to meet you and get a sense of you.
• 19:36
  SPEAKER_02: The challenge, though, is that nobody's in the room with you.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_02: And even in a virtual room, you know who's there.
• 19:45
  SPEAKER_02: So when you know who's there, you can then follow up and circle back and connect with them.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what we want to do.
• 19:53
  SPEAKER_02: We don't want to wait for the phone to ring or wait for the emails to come in.
• 19:59
  SPEAKER_02: We want to be able to go out and say on social media to someone via Facebook or LinkedIn, hey, thank you for coming to my workshop, and I'd love to talk with you about what you're up to and see if I can be of support to you.
• 20:13
  SPEAKER_02: That's an invitation to connect that you can't do when you don't know who's listening or you don't know who's watching.
• 20:24
  SPEAKER_02: And so...
• 20:25
  SPEAKER_02: That's how we cultivate relationships.
• 20:28
  SPEAKER_02: Now, social and podcasting and having your show like this, this is all wonderful for sharing information and connecting.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_02: The thing is that people usually listen a lot longer before they reach out to us, and so it's great for meeting the masses, but we also want to meet the gals who came to our Zoom room who we can follow up with.
• 20:52
  SPEAKER_02: And so we want to do both.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I can see what you're saying.
• 21:00
  SPEAKER_01: It makes sense to me.
• 21:02
  SPEAKER_01: Because I didn't consider like, you know, when you're in like a networking meeting or you're doing a workshop really as a public speaking because you know who's there.
• 21:14
  SPEAKER_01: But I guess that's the difference, right?
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_01: It's the opportunity that you have afterwards that makes it that much more important.
• 21:25
  SPEAKER_02: Right, right.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 21:27
  SPEAKER_01: Go ahead.
• 21:30
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, you go ahead.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_01: This is about you and what you have to say.
• 21:34
  SPEAKER_01: Well, my friend, I was just going to say that
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_02: the beautiful thing also about speaking is it's an opportunity to connect with a lot of people at once.
• 21:43
  SPEAKER_02: And when you go and speak to a group where nobody knows who you are, the facilitator of the group invited you, when you are able to meet a whole new group of people, from other states or even other countries or from other industries.
• 22:03
  SPEAKER_02: Like all of this is great for expanding your network and putting you in new situations and meeting new opportunities.
• 22:12
  SPEAKER_02: And that's another reason why speaking is so wonderful.
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, we get to meet so many people, don't we, because of that.
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_03: I
• 22:22
  SPEAKER_01: mean, look it, you're in San Francisco.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm in, like, little Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_01: And, you know, we've had many conversations, you and I, like, you know, over Zoom.
• 22:33
  SPEAKER_01: And without that, we wouldn't be able to do that.
• 22:36
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 22:37
  SPEAKER_01: Zoom.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_02: And we talk on Facebook.
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, maybe someday I'll get to Edmonton, Alberta.
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_02: And maybe someday you'll get to San Francisco.
• 22:48
  SPEAKER_02: And when we do that, it'll be even more fun.
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_02: because we already have built a rapport and we already know each other a bit and we already like each other.
• 22:57
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 22:59
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 23:00
  SPEAKER_02: And that can all happen before people meet live and in person.
• 23:03
  SPEAKER_02: You know, I just hosted last week, Tina, I hosted my speaker mastermind retreat live and in person at my center in San Francisco.
• 23:12
  SPEAKER_02: Now, The thing is, most of what I do is virtual, but I do host a speaker retreat three times a year where ladies come and we work on their speeches and we have fun and we connect.
• 23:24
  SPEAKER_02: And I do cruise retreats also, as you know.
• 23:27
  SPEAKER_02: But those are just the pinnacle of the program.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_02: Most of what we do is done virtually.
• 23:33
  SPEAKER_02: And that's the beautiful thing is that, for example, last week at our Speaker Mastermind, we had gals come from the East Coast.
• 23:42
  SPEAKER_02: We had...
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_02: gals from different states, because they only have to come for a week.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_02: And then for the rest of the year, it's all virtual.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_02: And that's a great way to build relationships too.
• 23:56
  SPEAKER_02: And it's great for business.
• 23:58
  SPEAKER_02: And so that's why it's important to get around and speak to groups all over, not just groups in your city.
• 24:06
  SPEAKER_01: Right, right.
• 24:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I agree with you.
• 24:11
  SPEAKER_01: I think it's great that– You know, we get to know people through whatever their message is through their speaking.
• 24:21
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely, I love that.
• 24:22
  SPEAKER_01: Now, you have this business.
• 24:25
  SPEAKER_01: I'm going to assume that you are in your business like 40-plus hours a week.
• 24:35
  SPEAKER_02: You know, it depends on the week.
• 24:37
  SPEAKER_02: I mean, of course, last week I was leading my speaker retreat, and So it was a lot of hours.
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_02: But guess what?
• 24:42
  SPEAKER_02: We don't start until 10 o'clock in the morning, Tina, for the retreat.
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_02: And then we go until 4.
• 24:48
  SPEAKER_02: And then sometimes we do things in the evening.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_02: One evening we went to the Moroccan Belly Dance restaurant.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_02: I took the ladies for dinner.
• 24:56
  SPEAKER_02: One late afternoon we had afternoon tea and we had guests come in and we had the ladies give speeches for them, short speeches.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_02: And so, first of all, I have a lot of fun in my business.
• 25:11
  SPEAKER_02: I think it's really important for people to have a lot of fun in their business.
• 25:17
  SPEAKER_02: And being with a group of women doing these things is very fun.
• 25:21
  SPEAKER_02: And it's also business.
• 25:23
  SPEAKER_02: And when I go on the cruises, I'm going on four cruises next year, Tina.
• 25:28
  SPEAKER_02: Two of them I'm leading and two of them I'm speaking on.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_02: And they're all business situations.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_02: And those will all be so much fun.
• 25:37
  SPEAKER_02: and they'll be great for business development too.
• 25:41
  SPEAKER_02: So when you say 40 hours a week, well, some weeks it might be 40, some weeks it might be 50, but if I'm on a cruise ship, does that all count too?
• 25:52
  SPEAKER_02: So as long as I'm having fun, and honestly, I never count the hours.
• 25:58
  SPEAKER_02: I count do I need a break.
• 25:59
  SPEAKER_02: I ask myself do I need more downtime.
• 26:03
  SPEAKER_02: When you're blissing in your business– And when you're blissing in your life, you have a lot more vitality.
• 26:09
  SPEAKER_02: And that makes it all feel like you're not working hardly at all.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_01: I agree 100% because if you're doing something that you love and makes you happy, it doesn't feel like work, right?
• 26:23
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I was leading into the self-care aspect.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_01: One of your pillars, when you talk about how to run your business, one of your main pillars is self-care.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I always include self-care for myself personally, but even for your business, because self-care is not just about taking a bubble bath and drinking a bottle of wine.
• 26:46
  SPEAKER_01: There's more to it.
• 26:49
  SPEAKER_01: It's about body, mind, and soul, and you being your business.
• 26:55
  SPEAKER_01: right like you sort of have to split yourself up okay now i mean this is me personally tina you know now this is me you know in full bloom styling tina so i it's like two different people how do you separate yourself in that way and how do you like give yourself the self-care that you need to protect your vitality and and to you know kind of raise it because there's some days where especially on a cruise when you're with someone for four to seven days you always have to be happy and prepared for whatever's going to come up.
• 27:27
  SPEAKER_01: How do you do that?
• 27:29
  SPEAKER_02: Well, one of the things is I don't just do it by myself.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_02: I have support.
• 27:34
  SPEAKER_02: I have a team that comes with me because my job, when it's programming time or it's event time or an excursion time or activity time, my job is to be with the ladies.
• 27:49
  SPEAKER_02: That's my job.
• 27:50
  UNKNOWN: Okay.
• 27:50
  SPEAKER_02: not to be putting together binders or tote bags or setting up the room.
• 27:57
  SPEAKER_02: I have a team for that.
• 27:59
  SPEAKER_02: And that's the first thing.
• 28:00
  SPEAKER_02: You need support so that you can do the important part.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_02: You know, the ladies are making an investment in themselves and they're making an investment to come and learn from me and spend time with me and be in community with me and the other ladies.
• 28:15
  SPEAKER_02: So that's the first thing.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_02: is I'm only doing the part that I have to do, that I want to do, which is be with the ladies.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_02: I have to take down time by myself in my cabin, rejuvenating, resting, got to get a lot of sleep.
• 28:31
  SPEAKER_02: Sleep is essential.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_02: And then I can be very happy when I'm with the ladies.
• 28:38
  SPEAKER_02: And in my business, Tina, too, I absolutely need down time.
• 28:43
  SPEAKER_02: I don't do appointments usually before 10 o'clock in the morning.
• 28:48
  SPEAKER_02: I might have team meetings sometimes, but it's looking at a schedule that works for me.
• 28:53
  SPEAKER_02: I'm honestly more of a night owl, so when the day is done and the calls are finished, then I'll take a dinner break and sometimes I'll do a little work at night, not all the time, but only when it feels like, yeah, let me work on this project.
• 29:08
  SPEAKER_02: That's great.
• 29:09
  SPEAKER_02: That works for me.
• 29:11
  SPEAKER_02: But for some people...
• 29:12
  SPEAKER_02: They want to be done at five and they don't want to think about business again until the next morning.
• 29:17
  SPEAKER_02: So it's really finding a lifestyle, a business lifestyle that works for you.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_02: I think I'm pretty much the same person of my life because when you have your own business, you get to be your authentic self too.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_02: And that's another thing.
• 29:33
  SPEAKER_02: Sometimes women have to unlearn the culture that they grew up in in their career because not so much their family of origin in this case, but how were they groomed to be?
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, maybe they said, you know, don't be emotional at work.
• 29:49
  SPEAKER_02: Well, when you have your own business and you're a woman, I think it's great to bring your emotions to work.
• 29:55
  SPEAKER_02: That's your heart that we want to show up in your business.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 30:00
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, when you're working in corporate or you're working for someone else, you have to put on the face that they want, right?
• 30:08
  SPEAKER_01: They don't want you.
• 30:10
  SPEAKER_01: They want you because of what you're capable of, but they don't want you and all your stuff.
• 30:18
  SPEAKER_01: They just want you and your capabilities.
• 30:21
  SPEAKER_01: That's one thing about running your own business, right?
• 30:23
  SPEAKER_01: You can be yourself 24-7.
• 30:26
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I like that part too.
• 30:30
  SPEAKER_01: Wow.
• 30:32
  SPEAKER_02: Yeah, I was just with one of my clients.
• 30:34
  SPEAKER_02: Her name's Heather.
• 30:35
  SPEAKER_02: She's fabulous.
• 30:36
  SPEAKER_02: And I just went on one of her business cruises.
• 30:39
  SPEAKER_02: It was called Profits in Paradise.
• 30:43
  SPEAKER_02: And she's an accountant and a profit strategist.
• 30:47
  SPEAKER_02: And she has pink hair.
• 30:49
  SPEAKER_02: And we wore fun glasses.
• 30:52
  SPEAKER_02: And she dresses up a lot.
• 30:54
  SPEAKER_02: And it's very different than most accountants.
• 30:57
  SPEAKER_02: And that's who she is.
• 30:58
  SPEAKER_02: And she's very happy.
• 30:59
  SPEAKER_02: And not everybody is going to say I want an accountant with Fincare, but a lot of us think it's pretty cool, right?
• 31:07
  SPEAKER_02: So we're not everybody's flavor.
• 31:11
  SPEAKER_02: That's okay because there's enough people on the planet for us to serve who will resonate with us.
• 31:19
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, isn't that the truth, especially today?
• 31:21
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you know, I mean, I think it's a little bit different with accountants and lawyers, but, I mean, we can work with people all across the world, you know, and still get the work done, right?
• 31:32
  SPEAKER_01: It's not like in the old days.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_01: I say old days in quotations where you had to work with the people beside you because we didn't have any options and we were all doing it the same.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_01: Today, that's the joy of being a life coach.
• 31:48
  SPEAKER_01: Everyone does something different.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_01: What you do, what I do, we might be getting to the same outcome, but we're doing it in a different way and it doesn't work for everyone each way.
• 32:01
  SPEAKER_02: Right, and the other thing that's really fun, Tina, is that we only have to work with people that we want to work with, right?
• 32:09
  SPEAKER_02: You know, if I meet someone and they say, oh, Katerina, I want to sign up for your sales class, and I've met them a few times, and every time I met them they were complaining about something, I don't have to call them back because I only want people to be in my community that are positive and uplifting.
• 32:29
  SPEAKER_02: We only have to work with people that we're excited to work with.
• 32:33
  SPEAKER_02: That's a wonderful thing about having your own business.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 32:38
  SPEAKER_01: I know there has to be people that will take on the business because one, they need the money or two, they don't have the heart to turn someone away.
• 32:51
  SPEAKER_01: The reality is if you and I don't Like if we don't jive, our personalities don't jive, we have to be the ones that say, you know what, this isn't going to work.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_01: We are not going to come with the outcome that you're looking for together because we are just on two different pages or we're striving in different directions or whatever the excuse is.
• 33:18
  SPEAKER_01: But we have to have that enough heart to be able to say that.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_01: And I think a lot of people have difficulty with that.
• 33:27
  SPEAKER_02: A lot of people do have difficulty with that.
• 33:30
  SPEAKER_02: And so as a result, they're not going to be the right match.
• 33:35
  SPEAKER_02: Well, they're not going to be the right match.
• 33:38
  SPEAKER_02: But, you know, the more we say yes when we really want to say no, the more we learn that we really need to say no when we want to say no.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 33:50
  SPEAKER_01: And that's being our authentic self, right?
• 33:52
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, why pretend?
• 33:53
  SPEAKER_01: Why should I pretend that I can make you feel better about yourself when in the end, I know that I can't, right?
• 34:01
  SPEAKER_01: Like I'm not being authentic to you.
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_01: I want to ask you, your book, Learn to Think Differently.
• 34:07
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_01: I'm assuming that it's a business book.
• 34:10
  SPEAKER_01: Can you kind of like, I mean, obviously, I don't expect you to sum it up in, you know, 30 seconds, but can you tell me a little bit about it?
• 34:18
  SPEAKER_01: Because it sounds...
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_01: Well,
• 34:21
  SPEAKER_02: thank you, Tina.
• 34:23
  SPEAKER_02: And actually, it's not necessarily a business book.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_02: It wasn't written for business.
• 34:28
  SPEAKER_02: It was written for everybody.
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_02: And it's about the idea that, yes, we want to think positively, absolutely.
• 34:36
  SPEAKER_02: And then we also, though, have to combine that with action and take positive action.
• 34:42
  SPEAKER_02: And The book, which is actually published in many languages and many countries, is really about taking time to get clear on what makes you feel good and what makes you happy and what you want your life to be about and then to take action on that.
• 35:05
  SPEAKER_02: And also to not get discouraged.
• 35:08
  SPEAKER_02: You know, the thing about pursuing our goals is that We pursue our goals, and then sometimes we pursue our goals, but we don't get our goals.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_02: Well, to recognize that not everything is delivered timeframe and by the due date that we put on our calendar.
• 35:26
  SPEAKER_02: And then how can we still continue to be in hot pursuit of something we want, even when it's taking a lot longer than we want it to take?
• 35:40
  SPEAKER_02: So that's part of...
• 35:41
  SPEAKER_02: what that book talks about.
• 35:42
  SPEAKER_02: And it also has many exercises and many what I call guiding principles to support us to have a more fulfilling life.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, my gosh.
• 35:55
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so I love it.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_01: It's on my list now.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_01: Because when I saw that, I'm like, oh, learn to think differently.
• 36:02
  SPEAKER_01: It made me think of that.
• 36:03
  SPEAKER_01: I can't remember now what it's called, but it's like think like a man.
• 36:08
  SPEAKER_01: Or think like a man, act like a woman.
• 36:12
  SPEAKER_01: I can't remember what it's called.
• 36:15
  SPEAKER_02: Or something like that.
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 36:16
  SPEAKER_01: Think like a man, act like a woman or something?
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 36:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 36:19
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: It made me think that, and I thought, gee.
• 36:23
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, obviously, you know, it's a different, you know, but I thought of that book right away when I saw that written down, and I thought, okay, I've got to ask about that book.
• 36:33
  SPEAKER_01: So what made you...
• 36:36
  SPEAKER_01: Write that because, I mean, you've run a business.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_01: You had a cafe that led you into coaching, that led you into public speaking.
• 36:44
  SPEAKER_01: What made you write a book about how people think and how to shift that?
• 36:52
  SPEAKER_02: Well, I guess there's a few answers to that question.
• 36:55
  SPEAKER_02: One answer is that the idea of positive thinking and– motivation and self-motivation is something that I've had my attention on since I was a kid because my father, who was an engineer, he's very introverted and he was a toastmaster because he was a manager and he had to give speeches.
• 37:18
  SPEAKER_02: So he went to, you know, toastmasters to learn how to speak.
• 37:22
  SPEAKER_02: And when he was there, he got turned on to Earl Nightingale and Nito Cobain and all the old-time guys who did motivational audio tapes.
• 37:34
  SPEAKER_02: And so he would listen to them in his office, his home office, some evenings, and I would go up and listen too.
• 37:41
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what I was raised on.
• 37:44
  SPEAKER_02: And then when I started my business, I also started participating in the National Speakers Association and others.
• 37:52
  SPEAKER_02: I got to hear, you know, live and in person.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_02: I got to hear Zig Ziglar and some of the other great names in speaking.
• 37:59
  SPEAKER_02: And this continued to turn me on to this idea that, you know, it's not just about what we do.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_02: It's about how we think.
• 38:07
  SPEAKER_02: And Norman Vincent Peale, he's the person who wrote the book Positive Thinking, I believe, way back when.
• 38:16
  SPEAKER_02: And that book is incredible.
• 38:21
  SPEAKER_02: And he's You would have to watch some maybe audio tapes or tapes on YouTube, but in my opinion, he's the best speaker that ever walks the face of the earth and very motivating and very uplifting.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_02: And the thing is that a lot of people, including myself, have a tendency towards depression.
• 38:44
  SPEAKER_02: And to secure good mental health, You know, there's all those self-care things we do, Tina, like exercise and a good night's sleep and good food.
• 38:54
  SPEAKER_02: But then there's the mental health things.
• 38:56
  SPEAKER_02: And part of it is paying attention to what we put in our brain or what we expose ourselves to, you know, not watching the horrible news all the time and instead watching positive things.
• 39:08
  SPEAKER_02: And that's what I always did.
• 39:10
  SPEAKER_02: And in the early days of my business, I wrote a lot of articles.
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_02: And Duncan Baird, who's a publisher in Europe said, they saw some of my articles and they asked me to write this book.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_02: And I was very happy to write it.
• 39:23
  SPEAKER_02: So that's how it came to be.
• 39:25
  SPEAKER_02: And it's
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: been out.
• 39:26
  SPEAKER_01: That's so awesome.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 39:29
  SPEAKER_01: I love that.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_01: I really love that.
• 39:32
  SPEAKER_01: And the thing is, like, I think that's all part of our own personal growth is when, as we get older and we go through, you know, we experience life, We start to look back and say, what made me do that?
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_01: Like, what made me act that way?
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_01: Or what made me, you know, buy this?
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_01: Or, you know, whatever.
• 39:51
  SPEAKER_01: Like, we look back and we go, like, where was I then?
• 39:54
  SPEAKER_01: And then it makes you think, well, okay, so if I'm looking at that, you know, what happened five years ago, like I was crazy, what am I going to be like five years from now?
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_01: And then, you know, then we go on that personal development journey, right?
• 40:11
  SPEAKER_01: You know, and then that's when books like this come in handy, right?
• 40:14
  SPEAKER_01: Because it helps us.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_01: Because if we can't, like, we don't know where we're going unless we really sit down and think about it.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_01: And, like, we have to make that choice.
• 40:26
  SPEAKER_01: Like, do I want to be a better person or do I want to just stay where I am?
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_01: Right?
• 40:31
  SPEAKER_01: Because I like to think that anybody who goes into, like, a personal development section of a bookstore is trying to make themselves better.
• 40:40
  SPEAKER_01: We're not reading personal development books to say who we are.
• 40:45
  SPEAKER_01: We want to make a better life for ourselves, right?
• 40:49
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 40:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I think a commitment to personal growth and development and saying to yourself, okay, as long as I'm here, I'm going to keep growing, those are people that are happy in life or happier or getting happy.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_02: Because you know, staying the same isn't really possible.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_02: We're either growing or we're shrinking every day.
• 41:15
  SPEAKER_02: And wherever we are today, we're a different person than we were five years ago and ten years ago.
• 41:22
  SPEAKER_02: You know, at my speaker class I did last week, I had a gal there who started with me in 2014, and then she developed a lot of good speaking business, and now she came back for a refresh.
• 41:37
  SPEAKER_02: I mean...
• 41:38
  SPEAKER_02: The woman who came last week is different than the woman I met in 2014.
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_02: We always, always, always want to recognize that even if we studied something before, the person we are today will have a lot more to learn and will learn differently and pick up new things than the person we were before.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_02: So it's important that we have a commitment to personal growth and development in our lives and our businesses.
• 42:04
  UNKNOWN: Okay.
• 42:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I agree.
• 42:05
  SPEAKER_01: I agree.
• 42:06
  SPEAKER_01: And in so many different aspects, too.
• 42:08
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, yeah, it's great for business because you have to be changing with the times.
• 42:13
  SPEAKER_01: But it's also good in your relationships because we all have to grow.
• 42:17
  SPEAKER_01: Like, I mean, I know you don't have children of your own, but, you know, when you have– when your family grows, right, your children– force you to grow.
• 42:28
  SPEAKER_01: And then, like, someone like yourself, like your friends, even if your friends don't have children of their own, they're working in businesses that their mind is always going.
• 42:39
  SPEAKER_01: So if you don't, you know, sort of follow suit, you fall behind, right?
• 42:43
  SPEAKER_01: And then you end up alone, right?
• 42:46
  SPEAKER_01: Like, you have to kind of go, you always have to be moving forward or you end up falling behind and lose everything.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_02: Well, yeah, and...
• 42:57
  SPEAKER_02: The thing is, too, you mentioned, Tina, about being alone.
• 43:00
  SPEAKER_02: There's a skill that I realize I have, which I think is going to keep me from ending up in an apartment by myself with my cats and wearing my house coat, is the ability to cultivate community.
• 43:21
  SPEAKER_02: and make friends and invite people to go where you're going and invite people to get together to do things.
• 43:28
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, if we're alone, it's because we're not connecting and we're not reaching out.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_02: And so it's important to recognize that that is a skill too.
• 43:40
  SPEAKER_02: And, you know, other people have their own lives too.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_02: We can't wait for them to knock on the door or even pick up the phone and call us.
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_02: It's really on us.
• 43:50
  SPEAKER_02: to do the reach-outs.
• 43:52
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely.
• 43:53
  SPEAKER_01: I do agree with that.
• 43:55
  SPEAKER_01: It's easy to say, well, she never phones me, right?
• 43:59
  SPEAKER_01: But the reality is she may not be phoning you because she's, number one, waiting for you to call, or she's busy, right?
• 44:06
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe she doesn't know that you want to talk with her, right?
• 44:09
  SPEAKER_01: So regardless of how long the time has been, I think picking up the phone or sending a message Just do it, right?
• 44:17
  SPEAKER_01: There's no harm done.
• 44:18
  SPEAKER_01: If they don't answer back, they don't answer back.
• 44:21
  SPEAKER_01: But at least they know that you are thinking of them and, you know, you want to connect.
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_01: So now you work with women mainly.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_01: I would like to hear, you know, one or two things that you tell every woman that you work with and that you're friends with.
• 44:37
  SPEAKER_01: What is like some words of positivity, words of love that you give them?
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_02: tell them I love them.
• 44:43
  SPEAKER_02: That's the first thing.
• 44:44
  SPEAKER_02: I think it's really important to say that I love you to people that are your close friends.
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_02: And I even say that to most of my clients because I do love them and they make me bliss in my life.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_02: And the other thing, Tina, is acknowledgement.
• 45:01
  SPEAKER_02: Now, acknowledgement, people think of acknowledgement often like a compliment.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_02: Well, a compliment is usually about something something aesthetic like, you know, I love your shoes or I love your hair.
• 45:14
  SPEAKER_02: Now, an acknowledgment is really about what someone did or how they're being or how it impacted me.
• 45:24
  SPEAKER_02: So, for example, I could say, Tina, thank you for inviting me on your show.
• 45:29
  SPEAKER_02: That's a doing acknowledgment, okay?
• 45:32
  SPEAKER_02: Or I could say, Tina, thank you for enthusiastically inviting me on your show.
• 45:37
  SPEAKER_02: And that's not only what you did, but how you did it, which makes people feel more seen, which is good.
• 45:44
  SPEAKER_02: But the best thing to do is to not just acknowledge people for what they did or how they were being while they were doing it, but more importantly, if I say, Tina, thank you so much for enthusiastically inviting me on your show.
• 45:58
  SPEAKER_02: You made me so happy when I got the invitation.
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_02: Now that's letting you know how what you did impacted me.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_02: And that makes people feel so much better and has them feel seen and heard and gotten.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_02: And it also makes us feel good when we acknowledge others in that way.
• 46:18
  SPEAKER_02: And so that's the thing that I teach all the time that I want people to understand and embrace because it will uplift all your relationships.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 46:28
  SPEAKER_01: I agree 100% there.
• 46:31
  SPEAKER_01: It's not really what you did or what you gave them.
• 46:34
  SPEAKER_01: It's how you made them feel that matters the most.
• 46:39
  SPEAKER_01: Right.
• 46:40
  SPEAKER_02: Exactly.
• 46:40
  SPEAKER_02: And that's another thing to say.
• 46:43
  SPEAKER_02: And when we tell people how they make us feel, we're letting them know how they have impacted us.
• 46:49
  SPEAKER_02: And we all want to have impact.
• 46:51
  SPEAKER_02: We all want to, you know, that means we matter, right, when we have impact.
• 46:56
  SPEAKER_02: Absolutely.
• 46:57
  UNKNOWN: Absolutely.
• 46:57
  SPEAKER_02: what it's all about.
• 47:00
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, I love it.
• 47:01
  SPEAKER_01: I am so happy after this conversation.
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_01: You've motivated me in such a way that I wasn't expecting.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you so much for being with me today.
• 47:13
  SPEAKER_01: Tina, any time.
• 47:14
  SPEAKER_01: My pleasure.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_01: I've just loved it today.
• 47:18
  SPEAKER_01: Confidence in Bloom is a celebration of self-love, a confirmation that you're an amazing, desirable, brilliant, gorgeous, talented woman, even though you may not look like a screen star or a supermodel.
• 47:28
  SPEAKER_01: The truth is they don't even look like that.
• 47:31
  SPEAKER_01: We offer unconditional love to our partners, our children, our extended family, even our pets.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_01: It's high time we got out of our own way and learned to unconditionally love ourselves.
• 47:41
  SPEAKER_01: Chic definitely does come in every shape.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_01: So if you want something to believe, start with yourself.
• 47:46
  SPEAKER_01: If you'd like to be a guest here on Confidence in Bloom and chat with me, contact me through Instagram at infobloomstyling or by email at tina at infobloomstyling.com or through the
• 47:58
  SPEAKER_00: Divas That Care website.
• 48:00
  SPEAKER_00: Thanks for listening.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_00: This show was brought to you by Divas That Care.
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_00: Connect with us on Facebook, on Instagram, and of course on DivasThatCare.com, where you can subscribe to our newsletter so you don't miss a thing.