Latest / Aspergers & Autism Podcast [The Aspie World] AuDHD / Autism Masking What Is It? - (What YOU NEED To Know)
Transcript
- 0:00Hey, in this video I'm gonna be talking about water, them and
- 0:03masking and what exactly it is, all that plus more is coming
- 0:07right up. Hey guys, welcome back to the
- 0:16ask me world. My name is Dan.
- 0:17I have autism ADHD OCD and dyslexia and I make weekly
- 0:22videos on this type of content. So if you're new around here and
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- 0:32miss any videos. All right, let's get on with it.
- 0:36Hey guys, welcome back. Its the ass for gold or year.
- 0:39Yeah, I don't know. I'm dancing.
- 0:40I feel kind of like feel like in a pretty good mood.
- 0:42They just being out for a walk feeling pumped, but I wanted to
- 0:45do a video about autism and masking because I feel like it's
- 0:48a big topic that we don't really cover.
- 0:50So if you want to go ahead and follow me on Instagram and
- 0:52Twitter and Tick-Tock the calls to action, my name's will be
- 0:55here. So you can follow me.
- 0:57Links are in the description below if you wanna check me out
- 0:59on there, but I also do content on those platform, so it's way
- 1:01worth checking it out. Okay.
- 1:02So, autism and masking. I wanted to try and cover in
- 1:04this video, some stuff about what has been masking and and
- 1:07how it kind of feels from that person's point of view and how
- 1:09you can potentially spot it. So if somebody is on the
- 1:12awesome, Spectrum. Then you can look at what
- 1:14they're doing and then kind of think, okay, well, maybe it's
- 1:16masking or maybe it's this, maybe it's that, and but it's a
- 1:18huge thing, like masking, an Autism is a big deal and I'll
- 1:21get into white a big deal right now.
- 1:23So I really want to start with some facts and figures.
- 1:26And why this is important to masking.
- 1:28Now, people diagnosed with autism, there are three times as
- 1:31many boys, diagnosis of autism. That alright girls, which is
- 1:34basically like, you know, you have one girl, diagnose.
- 1:37Autism for every three boys, diagnosed with autism, which is
- 1:40a really interesting figure, which means that, like, A third
- 1:44of only a third of the population of girls compared to
- 1:47boys, actually have autism diagnosis, but that isn't really
- 1:50the case of fact that they have, they don't have it like, you
- 1:52know, it's not like only like a lesser amount, have it?
- 1:55It's just that people on the autism spectrum.
- 1:58Specifically, females have a great deal of masking going on,
- 2:01which makes it harder to diagnose, which is one of the
- 2:04biggest reasons why girls are left out with the diagnostic
- 2:06criteria. A lot of the time and kind of
- 2:09slip through that net. The first time I want, it
- 2:10doesn't mean that they don't eventually do get the Moses and
- 2:12some cases that may be so, but it is something that is
- 2:15apparent. When first time they try to get
- 2:17diagnosed or seek medical professional help and assistance
- 2:20with that condition. So masking, it kind of sounds
- 2:24like exactly what it is. Now I'm asking, is when you are
- 2:30pretending to be somebody else or putting on an act or a
- 2:32performance or a Persona of putting on a front to cover the,
- 2:36the convey, your own kind of like personal traits of autism,
- 2:39your own kind of like insecurities and stuff.
- 2:42And it happens. It's not just females who
- 2:44actually masked males mask as well.
- 2:47I've done a great deal of masking in my time as well, but
- 2:50I'm looking to learning to just be myself because I feel like
- 2:52I'm asking isn't a good thing. I feel like my skin is something
- 2:55that is detrimental to to me. I mean, some people might really
- 2:59enjoy masking like, you know, like get some benefit out of it
- 3:02because I have some operate themselves in a certain
- 3:03environment. But for me it's a very difficult
- 3:05one to do because it makes me not me and I put it this way
- 3:10when I am quite An introverted person, I like to study stuff
- 3:16and read stuff and learn stuff in my office in my house, you
- 3:19know, snuggle down on the couch in my bed, whatever.
- 3:22Learn watch videos, make videos, right?
- 3:25Music, you know, all kind of stuff, but I liked it on my own.
- 3:27I like to be on my own a lot of the time.
- 3:29I like libraries, I don't like going out to clubs.
- 3:31I don't like drinking alcohol and going, I don't drink
- 3:33alcohol. But I mean I don't like going to
- 3:34clubs with people drink alcohol and like have a big time.
- 3:37There's loads of people in there like you shoot, but I do play
- 3:39music and I play in a band and my band assigned to Record
- 3:42labels, which means that we have done a fair amount of touring
- 3:45and playing music around the world.
- 3:46And so when I play music like I don't want to be in the club
- 3:51environment. So I'm usually backstage, you
- 3:53know, in the green room until we come on and play.
- 3:55And then we've got, we pack the van and we go.
- 3:56But in terms of actually being in that environment and going on
- 4:01stage, I'm quite a shy person, but I put on a Persona a
- 4:05performance because I'm performing as a musician at that
- 4:08time. And I put on a performance, I
- 4:10was a musician and I go out there and do it and I come off.
- 4:12Stage and then I do my other thing and that's why I get
- 4:15exhausted after gigs. Now, that is typically how
- 4:19someone who is masking. The autism spectrum symptoms
- 4:23does life with masking, because let's put it this way, put it
- 4:26into a perspective of a young girl, so young girl, who is very
- 4:29shy. She's quite introverted and she
- 4:31likes collecting stuff and she just likes to read books on say
- 4:34Harry Potter, right? And she's in high school and she
- 4:38is quite shy person and we talk to anybody, you know, quiet, you
- 4:41know. Girl, if you know a few words,
- 4:44but she goes to school and she sees all this hustle and bustle,
- 4:47as I'm the load of people are talking about different things,
- 4:49not just Harry Potter, all this kind of stuff going on and girls
- 4:52are quite social, you know. And they've got big Social
- 4:54Circles, and social friends, and want to do this, that, and the
- 4:56other and talk about all things. And the girl is on the Spectrum,
- 5:00joined this school and decides that, oh my goodness, you know,
- 5:03just quite overwhelming. How do I fit into this category?
- 5:05How do I, how do I exist in this environment?
- 5:07And the only way they see fit is to, you know, front it be like
- 5:11yeah, course I Totally get what you're talking about.
- 5:13I get, you know, I told him to like you know, all the magazines
- 5:15you guys watch all the apps or websites or the YouTube that you
- 5:18talking about, but then also doesn't mention the Harry Potter
- 5:22thing and just makes out is if she is outgoing as the other
- 5:26girls because you just want to kind of like be outside of that
- 5:29friends group and this is typically how marketing works
- 5:31but it's not a it's not a good thing for a simple reason and
- 5:34this is what happens. So the masking masking masking
- 5:36that then sales they have them as a person but they're masking
- 5:40their autism side, you know that the things that My friend
- 5:42unusual and then they mask all day and then they come home and
- 5:47it's like a complete, like explosion.
- 5:49Like they, they have like a lava got complete meltdown shut down.
- 5:52But, you know, break down because they've still exhausted.
- 5:55Their resources are being human. You know, how exhausting is that
- 5:57putting on an act all day and then they come home, and they
- 6:00have a huge amount down. I mean, imagine that happening
- 6:02every day, like, five days out of the week and on the weekend,
- 6:04then you just too exhausted to do anything.
- 6:06If you're a parent watching this video right now and you know
- 6:08exactly what I'm talking about, please give this video a thumbs
- 6:11up because I'd love Of to see how relatable this is to other
- 6:14people, because I feel like it is relatable and people can
- 6:17relate to it. And I just want to make sure
- 6:18that yeah, well, we're exchanging awesome things.
- 6:21So please give it a thumbs up. If you relate all, leave me a
- 6:23comment if it sounds like somebody, you know, but that is
- 6:25typically how I'm asking works. Now it comes from the fact that
- 6:29people on the autism spectrum who are of lower support needs
- 6:32which used to be called like high-functioning, but people
- 6:35don't really use functioning labels anymore but people with
- 6:37like lower support needs who are on the autism spectrum.
- 6:40They actually like, Think about those things like Social Circles
- 6:44and wanting to make friends. I'd being part of groups and
- 6:46stuff and it actively thinking in those weights.
- 6:48And so they're trying to make workarounds and these are called
- 6:50like you know, of work around topics.
- 6:52So that for instance, like you know, if you if you thinking
- 6:55like I want to, you know, I I don't know what I'm supposed to
- 6:59do in certain social situations, so then you study so many and
- 7:01social situation and then you watch what they do.
- 7:04And so you just copy them next time.
- 7:05You know this is a work around our hack for figuring out that
- 7:08you could actually be in that situation without actually
- 7:10having to really understand art. Here to the social conventions.
- 7:13Now girls are on the autism spectrum, kind of want to be
- 7:16more in the social thing. It's kind of like a, you know, I
- 7:18don't know, it's instinctual whatever but I want to be in
- 7:20Social Circles, they want to like talk to people on a certain
- 7:22level and have those kind of relationships and have those
- 7:24intimate kind of like, you know, friendships are people where
- 7:27they can talk about things, I don't know.
- 7:29But the entire idea of doing all that thing, it can be
- 7:33overwhelming because if you're on the autism spectrum of those
- 7:35things, kind of Don't Come Easy. So you have to kind of pretend
- 7:38that you already know those things which can really get you
- 7:41into Cash. Sticky situations because then
- 7:44they might think that you are cool or something, but then you
- 7:46may have a meltdown as a, you know, say this it all gone on
- 7:49the camping we can draw going to go camping and do this thing
- 7:51with, like a club with school. But that's something that would
- 7:53terrify me in, might terrify some other girls on the
- 7:56Spectrum. But, you know, if they did that
- 8:00camping trip, they would then maybe have a meltdown in the
- 8:04cost their friends and stuff. I'm like, oh my goodness, who is
- 8:06this? You know what's happening is as
- 8:07person they were absolutely fine.
- 8:08But now that when this huge like meltdown, why it would be kind
- 8:10of like a puzzling for them, it wouldn't be like some Bad.
- 8:12I'm just saying that it's pausing for them.
- 8:14So the reason masking kind of can get you stick situations
- 8:16because not being 100% honest with everything that you're
- 8:19doing or being. But then again, masking isn't
- 8:22something that's voluntarily done.
- 8:24A lot of the time masking is done involuntarily.
- 8:26It's kind of like something that they can't control.
- 8:28It's something that just happens because you're in a situation
- 8:31where you have to try and figure out, it's almost like this.
- 8:34The autism brain wants to solve puzzles constantly.
- 8:36That's it. That's its main priority autism
- 8:38brains one solve puzzles. So how do you solve the issue of
- 8:41social communication? Even when you mimic somebody
- 8:43else in that situation by masking, by putting on a
- 8:45Persona, becoming somebody else, it kind of like, a public
- 8:48performance and and relay their performance to those people to
- 8:51overcome the problem of that thing.
- 8:53And so that becomes that problem solution is already done.
- 8:56So, this is what I mean by, you know, masking is kind of, it's a
- 9:01difficult thing to deal with, but that respect, if you are
- 9:05seeing masking in people, my advice would be to tell him that
- 9:08like they don't have to mask it. If they can control it, they
- 9:11should be themselves. They Should be 100% themselves
- 9:13and they should try to be as much themselves as possible.
- 9:16Because being themselves, it's always going to be better.
- 9:19The only thing you can't improve upon is the truth as my father
- 9:22would say. So I would highly recommend
- 9:23doing that but parents listening to this right now, if you're
- 9:26interested in joining a webinar that I made specifically for
- 9:28parents and caregivers of people on the Spectrum, you can click
- 9:32the link in the caterpillar. It's a live webinar.
- 9:33You watch completely for free and it has some training there
- 9:36for people who I wanted to, you know, do a little bit more with,
- 9:39you know, learning about autism for their children's sake, Etc.
- 9:42So we've in the car both here and in description down below.
- 9:45But for now guys, that is all. I'll see you in the next video.
- 9:48Peace. Hey guys, thank you so much for
- 10:00listening to this podcast. If you haven't already, please
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