Latest / Daily Influence / 791. Choosing Gratitude Through Grief: Gretchen Gullo on Faith, Joy and Kindness

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791. Choosing Gratitude Through Grief: Gretchen Gullo on Faith, Joy and Kindness · Daily Influence

• 0:10
  [SPEAKER_00]: Welcome to Daily Influence, your daily dose of positive influence.
• 0:14
  [SPEAKER_00]: I'm Brian Smith founder of IA Business Advisors and co-author of the Iain team series.
• 0:19
  [SPEAKER_00]: Each day we share stories and insights to help you find be and build your influence in a positive and responsible way.
• 0:27
  [SPEAKER_01]: And I'm Greg Clino, partner at IE Business Advisors, and co-host of Daily Influence.
• 0:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: Be sure to follow, subscribe, and share Daily Influence with someone who could use a little extra positivity today.
• 0:38
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• 0:48
  [SPEAKER_01]: Welcome to Daily Influence, I'm Greg Clino.
• 0:51
  [SPEAKER_01]: Before we dive in, I want to share a quick note.
• 0:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: We recently launched the Smart Advantage newsletter, which offers practical insights on leadership, accountability, workplace culture, and building a stronger business delivered to your inbox weekly.
• 1:05
  [SPEAKER_01]: If you're looking for simple, actionable ideas, you can apply in your business or leadership role, you can find the link to subscribe in the show notes below.
• 1:15
  [SPEAKER_01]: And now, let's move into today's conversation, where we'll continue exploring the ideas, actions and influence that helps us lead and live with greater influence.
• 1:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: Today, I'm joined by Gretchen Gullo, founding broker with App Properties in Park Ridge, Illinois.
• 1:32
  [SPEAKER_01]: Gretchen has spent decades serving people through real estate, but her influence reaches far beyond business.
• 1:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: After enduring the devastating loss of her son and husband within days of each other, Gretchen made an intentional choice to continue seeking joy.
• 1:49
  [SPEAKER_01]: practicing gratitude and serving others with purpose.
• 1:53
  [SPEAKER_01]: Her story is one in faith, resilience, generosity, and the kind of responsible influence that reminds us our actions, even small ones can lead a lasting imprint on the people around us.
• 2:06
  [SPEAKER_01]: Gretchen, welcome to daily influence.
• 2:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you.
• 2:10
  [SPEAKER_01]: We're excited to have you.
• 2:12
  [SPEAKER_01]: Before we get into some of the deeper parts of your story, I'd love for our listeners to understand who you are beyond your title.
• 2:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: You've spent decades as a realtor serving clients through major life transitions, and you've also lived through losses that most people cannot imagine.
• 2:29
  [SPEAKER_01]: When you look back over your life, what experiences most shaped the way you see people, service, gratitude, and influence today.
• 2:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, that question is honestly very easy for me to some people who really understand it.
• 2:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: This summer of my senior year in high school, I came to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord.
• 2:52
  [SPEAKER_02]: And my wife was for Virgin.
• 2:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so truly, that has made the impact of my life.
• 3:01
  [SPEAKER_02]: Slowly, surely, because each day, I tried to do,
• 3:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: my world with his films or not mine.
• 3:12
  [SPEAKER_02]: And it makes you look at people at their hearts and not to be hated.
• 3:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: So for me, I believe in joy.
• 3:19
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, in your story about paying forward the kindness your son once experienced, you turned a simple moment with three boys at a pizza place into something meaningful.
• 3:31
  [SPEAKER_01]: What did that moment teach you about the power of small acts of generosity and health and listeners trained themselves to recognize those opportunities in everyday life?
• 3:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I grew up in a giving family where my dad was always the one who wanted to pay the extra quarter going through the tall group just for the person behind just cut his.
• 3:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: And what I have found is that even the smallest gestures can really impact somebody.
• 3:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: I said to give one quick example because it was so amazing.
• 4:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: I remember walking into a hair airport and going through TSA and listening to this may go crazy because she
• 4:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: Everyone was knowing everything about her and how angry she was.
• 4:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: She dated the city and by the time we got to TSA, she got Mr. Blake and I happened to see her again.
• 4:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: Only four or five people in front of me waiting to gain parents popcorn.
• 4:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: And she was fine for kids, but she was also continuing to complain to anyone who was around her how much she hated Chicago.
• 4:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so I quickly went in front of her and excused myself and I said I needed to pay for her.
• 4:48
  [SPEAKER_02]: And with this dumb look on her face just by the one, and I said, well, you're having an awful day and you hate Chicago.
• 4:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I'm going to make sure you get on that lane and you will have one nice thing to think about, but you didn't have to pay for your kids' talk.
• 5:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, you know, with tears of laughter in her, I know that paying 18 dollars or whatever was changed her day.
• 5:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so sometimes it's just the smallest thing we can do that just really impacts people.
• 5:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I think, honestly, I get more joy than the person who's on the receiving event.
• 5:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's just fun.
• 5:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: That's a great story.
• 5:36
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for sharing that.
• 5:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, you share that after your son was found in your husband entered hospice.
• 5:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: People were surprised you could still see joy in the day.
• 5:47
  [SPEAKER_01]: That is not a casual statement.
• 5:49
  [SPEAKER_01]: It really reflects a very intentional and
• 5:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: When someone is walking through pain, disappointment, grief, or uncertainty, what does it practically look like to choose gratitude without pretending everything is okay?
• 6:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I was once told that if you're standing on a tree and you look to the left and it's a dark, unique desert and you look to the right and it's a beautiful,
• 6:23
  [SPEAKER_02]: to turn right.
• 6:24
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so to me, when you are hit with very enjoyable circumstances regardless of what it is, you have two choices.
• 6:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: You can either be angry, grow bitter, and a lot of people become very angry
• 6:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I believe to live him in your life because he didn't closet, he might have loved it.
• 6:54
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so for me, I have come to realize that I don't have to be thankful, you know, some people will say, well, you should be thankful in all circumstances.
• 7:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't agree with that.
• 7:08
  [SPEAKER_02]: I don't believe I have to be thankful that the boys died.
• 7:17
  [SPEAKER_02]: not born but in them.
• 7:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: And what I find is when you craft a strategy, when I practice tracing my Heavenly Father, a creator, joy starts to bubble up and it's even some days when it's hard to find which be grateful for in those spruce moments, but it's like working a muscle and it
• 7:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: it's real, you know, and just very grateful for all the years I have in my voice.
• 7:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for sharing that, you know, core principle we talk about on daily influences that influence is not neutral.
• 8:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: Our actions affect people, whether we intend them to or not, and your stories show someone who tries to be intentional with that influence.
• 8:14
  [SPEAKER_01]: How do you think about the responsibility you carry when others are watching and how you respond to hardship, success, competition, clients, and everyday interactions?
• 8:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, we learned something's some hard way that being in sales, people, your competition want to take advantage of your unavailable circumstances and use it against you.
• 8:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: And that was so hard to listen.
• 8:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: I've learned that we are only responsible for our actions.
• 8:49
  [SPEAKER_02]: I have to be able to look at the mirror and know that I have done what I need to do.
• 8:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so my grandmother used to say it was great.
• 9:00
  [SPEAKER_02]: To me, it was a pearls of wisdom.
• 9:03
  [SPEAKER_02]: But anybody can have a party.
• 9:06
  [SPEAKER_02]: When someone steals red wine on your white carpet
• 9:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: your true spirit comes out.
• 9:16
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so I think it's in the time of walking through those four times, is when that light is on you.
• 9:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I think not that you want to be contentious, but you need to be intentional of what you're doing and be transparent.
• 9:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: Oh, but you can still have joy and I also learned that people really don't want to be around and crabby people.
• 9:59
  [SPEAKER_02]: So I remember a wise woman at church that's mean, you had turned us
• 10:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: We will honor there, we will watch, and I thought it's so true because all I kept learning to do is saying all, you know, I don't want to be with anybody, it's I don't have to work.
• 10:29
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so I had to become even intentional as saying yes.
• 10:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: As much as I would
• 10:43
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then I would find, you know, it was very worthwhile and I could feel my own self coming back.
• 10:56
  [SPEAKER_02]: So we just got to be yourself.
• 10:58
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for sharing that.
• 10:59
  [SPEAKER_01]: You've built a long career in real estate and network is deeply personal because people are making major decisions about homes, finances, family, and transition.
• 11:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: Can you share a specific example of a time when meeting a client's real needs matter more than simply closing a transaction?
• 11:19
  [SPEAKER_02]: One of the things I love about real estate is my whole life I've been serving families.
• 11:23
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm wearing a single parent file here,
• 11:28
  [SPEAKER_02]: non-profit ones.
• 11:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: And my favorite one has happened 20 years ago, maybe.
• 11:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: This girl was referred to me.
• 11:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: It was husband and dad.
• 11:40
  [SPEAKER_02]: They went from living in a 1.5 million dollar house in New York, 20 years ago, to this little house in this bookie.
• 11:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: And, you know, she didn't
• 11:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: she really wanted to buy the house she was wanting.
• 12:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: So someone said, Gretchen, will you help her?
• 12:05
  [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, sure.
• 12:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: And the federal funds working with the lender and the owner, you know, to put all the pieces in the place.
• 12:20
  [SPEAKER_02]: And then
• 12:22
  [SPEAKER_02]: She received, you know, where I've been involved in the close with hers was amazing, and I didn't get a sense.
• 12:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: But this is how they work.
• 12:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: So managing my surprise seven years ago.
• 12:38
  [SPEAKER_02]: For six years ago, when I got a call from her and she said, do we can remember me?
• 12:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: No,
• 12:47
  [SPEAKER_02]: And she said, well, I'm going to hear it at some money, and they're debating now where they're to put a little addition on the house.
• 12:53
  [SPEAKER_02]: I said, a lot of them.
• 12:55
  [SPEAKER_02]: So I went out, we decided the addition was perfect, you know, for her to do it.
• 13:02
  [SPEAKER_02]: And as always, we even just said, well, wait, we had a thank you gift for you as I went and she said, oh, my kids and I knew we couldn't thank you back now, but now we can't.
• 13:14
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so she handed me what I thought was a card, you know, thanks card, but it waited a little more careful, maybe again, and it was a handmade card.
• 13:27
  [SPEAKER_02]: And it was a check for $10,000.
• 13:33
  [SPEAKER_02]: And I thought you'd try to be kidding me, and I didn't want to accept it.
• 13:37
  [SPEAKER_02]: And she said, well, we
• 13:42
  [SPEAKER_02]: but she said, you know, I'm a teacher's assistant, and I think that the words you should be telling me is thank you.
• 13:51
  [SPEAKER_02]: Okay, so that's part of my stance now.
• 13:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: I've already did to pass forward the lessons, but that truly is one of my favorite stories.
• 14:07
  [SPEAKER_02]: Because it was joy seeing her get those feet as that word.
• 14:11
  [SPEAKER_01]: You know, definitely the most beautiful story Gretchen, thank you for sharing that.
• 14:18
  [SPEAKER_01]: When you think about the hardest lessons that you've learned, what is one lesson you wish more people understood before life forces them to learn it the hard way?
• 14:28
  [SPEAKER_01]: Time is short.
• 14:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: And you never know when you're not going to see your love together.
• 14:35
  [SPEAKER_02]: So watch your words.
• 14:41
  [SPEAKER_02]: And you can't take those words back and that's been a hard lesson even for me to learn through the years, you know, because we're tired or we get caught up and just look, you know,
• 15:09
  [SPEAKER_02]: And so I would just say to people, be careful what you say, because it is not anything that's not encouragement, do you really need to say it?
• 15:22
  [SPEAKER_01]: that's created by scratch, and thank you for sharing that.
• 15:25
  [SPEAKER_01]: In closing, for our listeners who want to make a difference, but it may feel overwhelmed or they're grieving or discouraged or unsure where to begin, what is one intentional action that they can take today to become a more positive and responsible influence in someone else's life?
• 15:44
  [SPEAKER_02]: Well, I think it's true, folks.
• 15:46
  [SPEAKER_02]: I think you really have to stare at practicing gratitude.
• 15:50
  [SPEAKER_02]: And sometimes even when you can't think, you can think of one thing, be thankful you can breathe, right?
• 15:57
  [SPEAKER_02]: Hit for every breath.
• 15:58
  [SPEAKER_02]: And if other that goes hand in hand gives us, take the focus yourself and put it on someone else who needs you, whether it's offering a smile, whether it's offering a hand.
• 16:18
  [SPEAKER_02]: you take the focus on yourself, grow patterns, and you become more grateful.
• 16:26
  [SPEAKER_02]: And the joy starts to bubble from within.
• 16:30
  [SPEAKER_02]: Yeah, and I think that's the big one.
• 16:32
  [SPEAKER_02]: It's just helping others, right?
• 16:36
  [SPEAKER_02]: You know, we're one big community and if we can't take care of each other, we're kind of worthless.
• 16:43
  [SPEAKER_01]: Gretchen, thank you for sharing your stories and your advice with us.
• 16:47
  [SPEAKER_01]: What I really hope listeners take in this conversation is that influence does not always come from big platforms or perfect circumstances.
• 16:56
  [SPEAKER_01]: It often comes from choosing gratitude in the middle of the pain, serving the person in front of us and recognizing that even a small act of kindness can carry forward for many, many years.
• 17:08
  [SPEAKER_01]: Gretchen, if our listeners want to get
• 17:13
  [SPEAKER_02]: And they can get me through my social media, which is the attention below or email me and reach and go and watch emails.
• 17:25
  [SPEAKER_02]: I'm excited, I have a book coming out and I'm excited about that.
• 17:31
  [SPEAKER_02]: And it's really about being grateful.
• 17:34
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you for joining us.
• 17:35
  [SPEAKER_01]: I'm so grateful for you.
• 17:37
  [SPEAKER_01]: We'll put your information in the show notes for our listeners.
• 17:40
  [SPEAKER_01]: Thank you.
• 17:42
  [SPEAKER_01]: And to our listeners, thank you for joining us for another episode of Daily Influence.
• 17:46
  [SPEAKER_01]: Please share this episode with someone who could use a little extra positivity today to help us spread this positive influence.
• 17:54
  [SPEAKER_01]: And I encourage you to take one intentional action today.
• 17:57
  [SPEAKER_01]: Notice someone, encourage someone, serve someone,
• 18:01
  [SPEAKER_01]: Hey, forward a kindness that was once given to you.
• 18:04
  [SPEAKER_01]: That is how we build positive responsible influence one choice at a time.
• 18:09
  [SPEAKER_01]: Remember small actions create big impact, keep showing up, leading and growing one day to time.
• 18:16
  [SPEAKER_01]: Until next time, stay inspired and keep having a positive responsible influence.
• 18:21
  [SPEAKER_01]: Bye-bye.