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Trench Talk with Farron - Welcomes Navy Veteran Julian Richards · Military Broadcast Radio | MBR Talk

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  This entire military is 1 cohesive dedicated force and the
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  threats to our nations, they don't sleep.
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  They're watching our every move. Iran, Russia, China, North
• 0:15
  Korea, ISIS, Al Qaeda, they may be watching this right now.
• 0:22
  Our military should not be mistaken for our cable news
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  gadfest show. We don't care what you look
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  like, you don't care who you. Voted.
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  For who you worship, what you worship, who you love.
• 0:41
  We have been honed into a machine of lethal moving parts
• 0:45
  that you would be wise to avoid if you know what's good for you.
• 0:49
  We will not be intimidated. We will not back down.
• 0:55
  We don't want. War.
• 0:57
  But if you want war in the United States of America,
• 1:00
  there's one thing I can promise you.
• 1:01
  So help me God, someone else will raise your sons and
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  daughters. Opinions expressed in this
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  program are those of the speakers and do not necessarily
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  reflect the views or positions of any entities they represent.
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  Find us on the web at MB Radio dot US.
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  You are. Now.
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  All right, all right, Good evening and welcome to another
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  episode of Trench Talk. I'm your.
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  You can't hear me. Can you hear me?
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  Can you hear me? OK, Thank you.
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  Thank you. All right, good afternoon.
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  Work to another episode of Trench Talk.
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  This is for Rondozier, retired Army star in first class.
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  This is for Rondozier, retired Army star in first class.
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  Welcome you to another episode of Trench Talk here on MBR
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  platform. I want to say thank you for
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  tuning and listening in today. Always have a very important and
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  spectacular show for you here on the Military broadcast Radio
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  network. Make sure you go to the website
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  MBR radio dot US. Also you can download the app.
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  This station is giving veterans a voice like myself, although
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  I'm not new at this broadcasting world, but for some of us like
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  myself, I found my voice in in Internet radio back in 2009.
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  It literally didn't miss my depression and anxiety.
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  That blog talk show kept me alive because I was living into
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  those episodes at the same time thinking my life was over for my
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  experience of sickle cell trade exertion with rhabdomyolysis,
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  which ended my career. However, this platform became a
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  passion because I found that it's not just about sickle cell
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  trade or sports, but that others could come here and share their
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  stories and share their experiences.
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  And what that did for me is created this space that I could
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  stay connected to my veteran community.
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  One thing that we miss as veterans is that camaraderie.
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  And so we know that that importance of that sense of
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  belonging is, is so important, but not just for veterans.
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  We look at, we see that in athletes, we said it in, in
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  police officers, in, in sororities, fraternities, but
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  also in families. That sense of belonging is
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  something that is so important to us.
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  And sometimes there's fractures in it and that we feel
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  disconnected from our families and our loved ones and friends.
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  And what is that? Sometimes we're just dealing
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  with something inside, right? And so being able to find that
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  what's next for me was, was radio.
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  And, and this is how I get to be in front of you.
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  I have a very important guest for you today.
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  As you know that I do my shows 99% organic.
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  And so I, I don't really do research on my guest because I
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  want to be authentic and surprised.
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  And some of the conversations that I hear, well, as we're, you
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  know, designing and creating this conversation, but I can't
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  tell you, he called me before the show and he was like, this
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  is Bishop. I was like, who is this?
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  So I got a sneak peek and and that just added another
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  dimension of this conversation that I want to go in.
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  So I'm sure it was going to come out anyway.
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  But like I said, 99% of my conversations are organic.
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  And so I was very excited to hear that that that title of of
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  his background. So we're going to get into that.
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  I'm going to play some PSA's for you real quick.
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  And then we're going to come back and jump right into this
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  episode for trench talk, the frondose show right here on MBR,
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  all their platforms. If you want to go to TikTok,
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  Facebook, YouTube, Twitch X Roku TV, yes, we're live on Roku TV
• 6:30
  right now as well. So you can go to any of those
• 6:32
  platforms to catch the show and on your device as well again.
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  So I thank you for tuning this in so far.
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  This is the front dosa show AKA trench talk.
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  Some of us still carry the burden of battle.
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  It threatens to drown us in our everyday lives.
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  In battle, we had our weapons and combat gear to keep us safe,
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  to keep us confident, but when we returned home, we were not
• 6:57
  armed with weapons and gear to cope with our own minds.
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  I was lucky to find my combat gear, my mental weapon and it's
• 7:05
  called Kamago. Kamago is a drug free device
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  that allows you to achieve calm in less than 3 minutes and
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  moments of anxiety, stress, anger, panic or insomnia.
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  Not with medication, but rather by activating the
• 7:20
  parasympathetic nervous system through a breathing regulation
• 7:23
  and multi sensory stimulation. A recent study has shown that
• 7:27
  Comago decreases PTSD and anxiety levels in Veterans,
• 7:30
  helping those who are suffering and having a long lasting
• 7:33
  effect. Visit comago.com to learn how
• 7:36
  you can get Comago through the VA or with a special Veterans
• 7:40
  discount code. Hey, Mister man.
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  How you doing? I'm blessed, my brother.
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  I'm good, man. I'm good.
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  Hey, did you see the game last night?
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  I was your game. But did you see the shot?
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  I lost money from that shot. Oh, man.
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  That shot was old man. But it was good.
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  Yeah, what's the name you really want to know?
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  I do. Exhaustion, muscle spasm,
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  asthmatic issues, unexpected sickle cell trait.
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  Triton, Are you serious? When I was young I found out I
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  had sickle cell trait. My mom's told me but I didn't
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  have no knowledge of it. But when I got older, I had a
• 8:38
  child and the doctor told me my daughter had sickle cell trait.
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  Do you know the fact that both parents have sickle cell trait?
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  There's a 50% chance the child may have the trait and 25%
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  chance the child may have the disease, and that's what's the
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  count. Do you know that 225,000,000
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  people in the United States have sickle cell trait?
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  300 million people globally. I didn't find out I had sickle
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  cell trait until I was in the Army 10 years.
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  Next thing you know, I had a sickle cell trait.
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  Exertion site, simple cell. I thought that was a black gene.
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  Or something. Nah man, the black community is
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  number 21 out of 36,000 babies are being born with sickle cell
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  disease. You could be a Caucasian,
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  Mediterranean, European, you got to read a bloodline man.
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  There is an inherited gene in our community that has been
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  forgotten. The name is Sickle cell trait.
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  WDCONSCT, also known as What's the Count, is out to bring
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  awareness, education and prevention to people all over
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  the globe. Want more information?
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  Call us now at 323-215-5384 or visit WWW dot WDCON sct.org.
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  All right, welcome back to again another episode of Trench Talk
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  Frondosier show right here on MBR.
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  All right, so I hope you're ready and excited to have this
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  conversation and to hear about this conversation.
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  Ladies and gentlemen, again, I was introducing him by Lisa
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  Cooks and she just said, hey, I got someone for you to
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  interview. And we have been in
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  communication the last couple of weeks now.
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  And of course, I got to acknowledge California, Los
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  Angeles with these fires, these winds out here in the Inland
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  Empire. We were going to do this last
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  week. However, the winds were blazing
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  last week, as you know. And so we always stand in a gap
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  for those who have lost their homes and families and friends.
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  And so, you know, this week I almost pulled the plug because
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  it was windy again. But you know, sometimes you can
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  when you when you pray and ask God, hey, you could talk to the
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  winds, right? You can actually speak to those
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  winds. And so I spoke to the winds
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  like, hey, come on, man, give me a break.
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  What you got you got going on today?
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  So here we are. No, no, no issues for the
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  Internet. So we just going to get right
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  into our episode today with our special guests.
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  How you doing, Sir? Everything is well, how about
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  yourself? I'm great, I'm great.
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  Thank you for hanging out today. Absolutely.
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  I'm here. I'm locked.
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  In ready all right all right again, thank you for for taking
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  time out today. As you've heard I'm I'm very
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  excited to have you here to just share your life before, during
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  and after the military service. And so if you could do me a
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  favor and just introduce yourself and we'll get started.
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  Absolutely. Greetings everyone.
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  My name is Julian Richards, as I shared earlier in some circles
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  is Bishop Rich, and there's a lot to that title and a lot to
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  that name. Originally I hailed from Los
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  Angeles, CA, so all my family to my knowledge is safe because of
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  the fires, little little smoke damage and things like that.
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  But that's pretty much it, you know, getting on up there,
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  getting a little long in the tooth, but God good to me.
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  Thank you. Thank you opportunity for you to
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  give me a platform to be able to express things that I've been
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  through also. And I thank you for that in
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  advance. Appreciate you again.
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  Thank you so much. I'm from LA as well, so give me
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  some background. Who's Julian growing up as a
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  young child? Ah man, ah well, just a tad bit.
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  Just a plug for my book. I wrote a book and it was called
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  Just Julian. OK.
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  In that book, I detailed my upgrade, bringing in South
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  Central LA when I graduated from high school, I was at the age of
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  17. I joined the Navy right out of
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  high school, graduated June, and I was marching in San Diego in
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  July. Wow.
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  Wow. Yeah, Class of 87, Julian was, I
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  used to sell candy and that exposed me to the different
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  neighborhoods, the Westwoods, the Beverly Hills, the Santa
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  Monica's. Those were coming from South
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  Central. Those were the affluent
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  neighborhoods. And so I knew even though I saw
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  drugs and gang members and not until I got outside of my
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  community, I was like, man, if you work hard, you bust your
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  tail, you know that different things to be available for you.
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  So I was always a dreamer and this dream and talk to God.
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  I had an aunt that was the leader of our family and my aunt
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  used to take me to church with her.
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  So I had conversations with God growing up, like protect me.
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  Everybody in my neighborhood said don't join the military,
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  don't go, don't go. But I was determined at a young
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  age. And so that's the young me.
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  When I was in June, I. Hold on, hold on.
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  Let's go back, let's go back, let's go back.
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  We talked, you meant, you said some key points there.
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  So I don't want to just glaze over that.
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  Of course, you know, people have their perceptions of LA and when
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  they think about LA, they think about all, like you mentioned
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  the crime, the gangsters and all that.
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  How did you know growing up in school in your school ages, like
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  how did you maintain or manage that or stay away from that?
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  Like what was going on in that part of LA that you grew up in?
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  Well, I like to believe it was like my best friend, my best
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  friends, you know, we, we came up with a clique.
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  It wasn't a gang set, but a clique, you know, a bunch of
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  boys that like playing Domino's, like playing spades and tonk and
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  stuff like that. And so, yeah, you ain't heard
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  that word in a long time. But yeah, that's what we used to
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  play. And so we got a pass on our
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  neighborhood, you know, from the the foolishness that they were
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  doing. And but we knew everybody and
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  everybody grew up, so we all knew we was from the same
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  neighborhood. And I just had this burning
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  desire inside of me to thrive at school.
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  I went to school and got perfect attendance and didn't have to
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  go. I, you know, my mom, my dad, we
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  had a lot of substance abuse in my family, but I was determined
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  real quick. I can remember going to school
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  and my neighbor putting a towel around me and, you know, because
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  my school, my pants were so wrinkled.
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  And she said they let you out the house like that, baby, I'm
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  going to teach you how to iron. And she can iron my pants.
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  And, you know, but I was just that determined to go to school.
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  And that's the young Julian. Can we go to the mother father
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  conversation? Because that's something that
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  definitely so. OK, perfect.
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  So I have this conversation that I wrote some inspirational reads
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  called Life of a Right. And so in my work that I've done
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  in my life, I've discovered 10 strongholds.
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  I can relate to the Bible with those strongholds experiences
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  that I experienced as a child that kind of really shaped my
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  perception of who I was as a person.
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  And, and so the life of a 5 year old is the story of where I
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  made-up a story about my dad, where I thought my dad didn't
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  love me at 5:00. So let's talk about that part.
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  What was your relationship from you to your dad as at that young
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  age and what you experienced? If you could share some.
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  Of that, yeah, great question. My my dad.
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  So at the end of his life, he died with the drug overdose, But
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  he wasn't a everyday junkie, if that makes sense.
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  He wasn't, but he he sampled and did things all my life, But he
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  was my hero. He was now he had a lot of
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  qualities and a lot of traits that I've learned that is
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  learned behavior. That's what I saw how I treat
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  women, how I used to talk to women and but he was my guy and
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  you know, and at the end of the day, you can't choose your
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  parents, right. So and he was a Navy man and by
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  him being a Navy man, I think first psychology on me because
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  you will never make it in the Navy.
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  You you talk back too much. I showed him.
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  That's cool, you know it did. Did his Navy experience
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  influence you or was that something that you chose on
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  your? Own because I would hear the
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  stories of going to the different places and you look at
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  it on a globe back then you like, wow, that's far.
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  He traveled and he went world and so I had that I had
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  opportunity to join all the branches after I took my ASVAB
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  test and but that it was something tugging at me saying
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  the Navy. Now the story that I write in my
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  book, I couldn't swim to save my life, but it was a but God
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  moment that got me to have a successful career in the
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  military and it almost didn't be.
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  I almost didn't make it. Yeah, I they was like, we're
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  going to process you out if you know how to swim, man.
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  I went to bed with Jesus, that in my house, in my bunk,
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  everybody out and doing what we do after night, writing letters
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  and hanging out. And I was in my bunk crying out
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  to God and I was saying I can't go back to South centralizing
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  failure. They can swim while I can't
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  swim, I mean. And so Jesus allowed me to
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  conquer my fear, and I swam like a Fishman.
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  That's good. That's good.
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  Thank you. Yes, Sir.
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  If, if, if there's a song, the first song that comes to mind
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  reminds you of your pops. If there's a song that the first
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  song that comes to mind that you would when you hear on the radio
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  or something that said, oh, that's my dad right there.
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  Well, you know, my dad, he liked it hip hop before I did.
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  And so he would come along and say, what's this song?
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  Right. And I like and when I hear it's
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  two and this is weird. Nobody may notice the bat
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  around. I don't know if you.
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  Heard. Oh yeah, of course I.
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  Like that one, but and then like every now and then when I'm
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  going through something, I hear, Monica, I love you just because
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  that's my daddy. Me and him one day rolling.
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  I'm a new driver. We was rolling and it was
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  banging on the radio and both had our tall cans in the in the
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  car driving dirt, right? And when I hear that song, I
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  just go back to me, him and Monica and I, I have to take a
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  pause for the 'cause sometime I'm better, but that was me and
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  him. Thank you, thank you.
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  I, I believe that we all have a soundtrack to life, right?
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  And so when those songs come on, you know, it takes us to those
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  good, bad and different moments of our life, right?
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  So I appreciate you for sharing that.
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  I want to ask you now about your mom.
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  Like what was Mom's like? Yeah, well, Mom is still here.
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  Mom is still in the land of the living.
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  She's suffering right now. A little bit of some stuff that
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  come with age. Touching age, right and so.
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  But Mom was a rock. She was solid.
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  Mom would fight gang members for me.
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  Yeah, my mom. She told me when I came running
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  home. She said.
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  We went back around and she broke a bottle and I'm like
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  Mama, you go get beat up at me. It beat up but my Mama was like
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  y'all leave because they took the ground beef from me.
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  Oh no, she sent you to the store.
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  And she sent me to the store and they took it from me.
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  So I can't back home with no ground beef.
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  Yeah, I remember that, man. But my Mama, she was out there
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  in it with me. And I was like, I stopped
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  telling because my Mama would be like, who did what when we're
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  going back over there and telling my Mama nothing, no
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  more, because that's how she was.
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  My my spiritual side come from my mother's side of the family.
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  Oh, OK, OK. Deacon and him and my
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  grandmother, they was, I'm going to say, a black love story.
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  They came here right after the World War 2 and they migrated
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  out here from Texas and they had 12 children, six boys and six
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  girls. Wow.
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  One of them. And they had a successful
• 21:13
  business. Watts and my my grandmother
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  worked successfully at General Hospital downtown Los Angeles.
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  She did 30 years working there. So that's where I believe my
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  work ethic comes from. Values come from that side of
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  the family. I mean, you know, I always tell
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  people my daddy's side was rough and rugged, and my mother's side
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  was more diplomatic and more, you know, peaceful, peaceful
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  people. Jesus.
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  You know, we got a comment that says family and grandkids.
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  And that's it now. Life.
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  I got my office grandkids all around here.
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  Yeah. Yeah, You know, let's touch on
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  the sibling aspect of it. How, how was the relationship
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  with your siblings growing up? I, I, I've learned that in some
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  cases, each one of us grew up with a different view of mom and
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  dad, right, Because we have our different perceptions.
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  So how was that for you and your siblings?
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  Going back in I was the oldest, oh, I was the oldest of five
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  children would have been 6, but two have passed away. 2, my only
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  sister, biological sister and my brother, they passed away.
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  My brother, I'm 55. My brother would have been 54 if
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  he would have been here. But they they going on the
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  glory. But I was like a dad to them.
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  I got a brother in Arizona and one in Arkansas right now and
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  anything they leaning on me or they calling me, you know, I'm,
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  I'm solid to them. I'm like dad to them.
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  Yeah, clean version. They know we're different.
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  We, we got, we got that far in age.
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  I'm 54 about to be 55 this year. So we not we not that we not
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  that different. That's why when I said toddy T
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  bat around you. You know, I, I want to go, you
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  know, to, to the spiritual conversation of this because
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  there's a there's a point for that, that conversation. 01 more
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  before the song that reminds you of your mom.
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  Any song that comes on the radio or that you remember that.
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  My mom I I got 2 with her too. It's one the one how did I go
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  when I think in my mom. Oh, it's Tupac song, Dear Mom.
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  Of course, Yeah, yeah. One for my mother and then a
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  little bit more old school is something about the name Jesus.
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  Something about the name Jesus. I could just see my mother.
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  My mother didn't lead me to church, but her aunt, her
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  sisters and my grandmother was kind of, that's who they were,
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  you know. But my mother, when I go over to
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  her house, she reading her Bible, reading her word.
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  I was going through difficulties, always pointed me
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  to the Word. And so those are the songs that
• 24:07
  come to my mind when I think of my mother.
• 24:10
  Yeah. Thank you for that.
• 24:11
  And again, it's important for me that that mother conversation
• 24:14
  for me is the life of an 8 year old because I grew up thinking
• 24:18
  that my mom abandoned me right as a latchkey kid in 1978, right
• 24:22
  walking to school and and it was a transition.
• 24:25
  It was a transition because I grew up my grandparents from 2
• 24:28
  to 8. And so me being moved from my
• 24:31
  grandparents house to this new apartment with nobody there,
• 24:34
  like there's a whole thing that we deal with right then.
• 24:37
  So they called us latchkey kids back then.
• 24:40
  And so I, I had made a, the story rang in my head for like
• 24:46
  it happened yesterday. And it wasn't until 40 years old
• 24:49
  that I was doing the work around that and started to discover
• 24:52
  these 10 things that was going on in my life in my past.
• 24:56
  And, and that was one of the stories of standing at that door
• 24:58
  with my mom with my backpack on. And she says, you know, here's
• 25:03
  the keys to the apartment. I'm leaving you when you get
• 25:05
  home, lock the door, don't go outside, don't turn the teeth,
• 25:08
  don't turn the oven on, don't cook, blah, blah, blah.
• 25:11
  And, and all I heard was I'm leaving you.
• 25:14
  And the pain in my gut that I felt and then that transition
• 25:19
  that we're learning about now is I made it mean that my mom, I
• 25:24
  can't trust my mom, right? And I, and now I got to be
• 25:27
  responsible for this key, right? And then I walked to school.
• 25:32
  And so not knowing, you know, any child, none of that
• 25:36
  psychological mental aspect of it, you know, we didn't have
• 25:39
  that back then. And so it wasn't until 40, so I
• 25:42
  lived 35 years that my dad didn't love me and then 32 years
• 25:47
  that my mom abandoned me. And so you can imagine, we'll
• 25:51
  talk about that later when we get into the word of how those
• 25:55
  shape our life and who we become to survive life in those mental
• 25:58
  aspects. And so being able to go back in
• 26:01
  time and unravel those stories and realize that, hey, they did
• 26:05
  the best they could with what they had.
• 26:06
  And I went to both my parents to ask him to forgive me for my
• 26:10
  behavior of how I treated them. And, and, and that led to even
• 26:16
  why I do talks now is because I'm learning getting back into
• 26:19
  church, you know, honor our father more mother, but also
• 26:24
  obey your parents. And I want to know if you could
• 26:26
  speak toward that from the spiritual aspect because I
• 26:29
  believe that the parents are the most, 2 most important people in
• 26:34
  our life. And when those disconnections
• 26:36
  are broken, we turn to our peers for love and acceptance in that
• 26:40
  elementary to middle school transition, looking for identity
• 26:44
  and all that from our peers. And when that gets broken, then
• 26:48
  who are we? And then we are susceptible to
• 26:51
  gangs and drugs and all these different things and our
• 26:54
  environment, right? So is there something that you
• 26:57
  can speak to that? Because I stand on a Malachi 4-5
• 27:01
  and six about returning the hearts of our children back to
• 27:04
  our parents and the hearts of our parents back to our children
• 27:08
  and also in Luke 17117 as well. And I believe that if if we did
• 27:14
  that work around reconciliation and forgiveness around our
• 27:18
  parents, I believe the whole, I know for a fact my whole world
• 27:23
  opened up to get my life back and take responsibility of my
• 27:27
  behaviors and then to even begin to love myself, then the same is
• 27:32
  that I love my neighbor. So is there anything of that
• 27:35
  that I shared that you can speak to from the spiritual aspect for
• 27:37
  people to to connect with? Oh, absolutely.
• 27:42
  And and I, and I say this like as you probably heard the term
• 27:47
  pulling, pulling back the onion, so to speak, because as you're
• 27:53
  talking, I feel your pain. And so now as we're talking
• 27:58
  about your pain and I'm addressing my pain.
• 28:00
  And this is what we've learned as veterans, that we need a safe
• 28:03
  place to land, yes, safe place to be vulnerable.
• 28:07
  I mean, I probably see me as Superman able to, you know, do a
• 28:12
  whole lot of things. But the reality of it is, is
• 28:15
  that when you go back to your upbringing, a lot of all of us
• 28:19
  in so many ways have experienced a lot of traumatic, traumatic,
• 28:24
  the, the, the, the, like you said, latchkey kids, people
• 28:28
  wouldn't even think about letting the 8 year old kid.
• 28:31
  Right. You know what I mean when I and
• 28:34
  so when I certain things. But to go back to your question
• 28:38
  and I'm thinking about Galatians the 6th chapter, right, and it
• 28:42
  tells us to so this is the in my church.
• 28:47
  I I try to do like what Jesus did and Jesus gives a lot of
• 28:52
  parables or analogies or examples for us to get it.
• 28:55
  Many a years I sat in church, I see the pastor get real sweaty
• 29:00
  and I kind of go out like it was like the Charlie Brown, like the
• 29:04
  peanuts I didn't get right. And I'm like, whoa, what was
• 29:07
  that all about? So when I came along, I said, I
• 29:10
  want to be more of a teacher because it doesn't make sense if
• 29:14
  I'm doing a whole lot of screaming and you like, what's
• 29:16
  the brother screaming about? I'm like, I could have been
• 29:20
  doing 20 years in the pen, but God say to me, you know what I'm
• 29:24
  saying? So but The thing is that I get
• 29:27
  the most and you hit it on the head that and I'm going to speak
• 29:31
  for my parents. Is that well?
• 29:33
  I said like this before my dad died.
• 29:36
  The last conversation we had, my dad said I'm sorry you and what
• 29:45
  I put you through. Wow.
• 29:47
  And I said to him, man, you don't owe me no apology.
• 29:49
  You toughen me up. You made me ready.
• 29:53
  You understand what I'm saying? That gave me closure.
• 29:56
  Let me tell you what happened. It was a Memorial Day weekend.
• 29:58
  Long story short, they were drinking and I bought some
• 30:02
  company over there. It was kind of embarrassing.
• 30:04
  So I was like, let's go. My friends, the man, we need to
• 30:06
  eat the ribs. Yeah, I was like, let's go,
• 30:09
  right? But normally I get so upset at
• 30:12
  them, I keep going. But I'm going to say it was the
• 30:14
  Holy Spirit had me go back over there.
• 30:17
  So I drove back over. That pulled up.
• 30:18
  Plus I wanted a plate pulled over there and I got there and
• 30:23
  they were sitting down watching TV like they do on a movie
• 30:27
  night. And I sat in the middle of him
• 30:29
  like a little kid again. And I, I, my, that's when my
• 30:32
  daddy started saying to me, man, I, I felt bad.
• 30:35
  I used to have long hair and ponytail, all that.
• 30:38
  And he used to say, ma'am, I'm sorry, used to slam me by my
• 30:41
  hair, kick me in the butt. Do I still speak finally of him?
• 30:44
  You heard me say that in the beginning.
• 30:46
  He's still my God, either be back in the word back in the day
• 30:51
  they say a punk or a Sissy. He he, he it was a lot of things
• 30:55
  that I used to hear that all the time.
• 30:57
  And so he was apologizing to me. I was like, man, there ain't no
• 31:03
  need you toughen me up. Even though I I I took some of
• 31:07
  them same things he did and I did them for myself.
• 31:10
  That that learned behavior. I, I always wanted to do things
• 31:13
  with my hands and because that's how he did me and much bigger
• 31:18
  and stronger than me. But I kept saying, when I grow
• 31:21
  up, we're going to go toe to toe.
• 31:23
  We're going to go toe to toe. But it never happened.
• 31:25
  And then as I got bigger and stronger, he couldn't catch me
• 31:28
  anyway anymore anyway, but spiritually.
• 31:32
  So I had to forgive them in order to move on with my life
• 31:35
  because I, I've asked God to forgive me of all the things
• 31:38
  that I can remember and learn. And so I, I, I married into a
• 31:43
  blended family. And the, the main thing I used
• 31:47
  to always stress to those kids was about honoring all in the 10
• 31:51
  commandments and all the old commandments always speak about
• 31:54
  honoring your mother and your father.
• 31:56
  Your mother could be a crackhead, a prostitute, a drug
• 32:00
  addict, but you still honored. And if you do that, you're going
• 32:04
  to go a long ways in life. And so that's the mindset that
• 32:07
  I'm constantly teaching kids, you know, don't be disrespectful
• 32:11
  to your mother. Don't be disrespectful to your
• 32:13
  father. And then as you grow up, you'll
• 32:16
  make choices in your life. Hopefully it'll be different
• 32:18
  than theirs. I've been working hard all my
• 32:22
  life just to not be who my daddy was.
• 32:26
  You see what I'm saying? That's the whole thing right
• 32:29
  there. And I I I.
• 32:31
  Thank you for saying that because that is what the
• 32:34
  ministry that God has given me again, as I, as I hit with my
• 32:38
  parents and then I was able to go to my three daughters and
• 32:41
  allow them to reconcile with me the same way that I went to my
• 32:44
  parents. And as you said, when I got that
• 32:47
  scripture, when I start speaking at church about 3 years ago, it
• 32:51
  was like the revelation that I got from the scripture was honor
• 32:57
  your father and mother is not, you're going to, you're not
• 32:59
  going to love them every day. But it's the honor is how I
• 33:03
  think about them. And that's where I want people
• 33:06
  to understand that you're not going to love your parents every
• 33:08
  day or your mom and dad every day.
• 33:10
  But it's so important on the thoughts that we have about them
• 33:13
  because those could be the things that keeps us
• 33:15
  disconnected from them. And, and, and we have no idea
• 33:21
  unless we have sat and talked to our parents like I did, was
• 33:24
  like, hey, what was going on when I was born, what was going
• 33:27
  on when y'all was little children and growing up.
• 33:29
  And I talked to my grandfather before he passed, like what was
• 33:31
  going on. And so it made sense when I did
• 33:33
  my own work to see like, Oh my goodness, like I, I people say
• 33:40
  generational curses. I look at it like a generational
• 33:42
  consequence because we keep having these conversations and
• 33:45
  we don't interrupt them or make the corrections.
• 33:48
  And so for me, it's it's it's my main mission outside my sickle
• 33:52
  cell trait work is really these conversations around family
• 33:56
  because I, I just believe that, as you said, the word is, is
• 34:01
  having people self examine themselves to reflect on that
• 34:05
  relation with their parents. That's why I asked those
• 34:07
  questions because you hear what people are dealing with out of
• 34:10
  our mouth come those issues of life right out of.
• 34:13
  And so I, I just thank you for saying that because that is
• 34:16
  something I want people to really have an opportunity to
• 34:19
  sit down and think about that because I was so grateful
• 34:23
  reconciling with my dad before he passed because I had eight
• 34:25
  years like I had my dad back for eight years.
• 34:28
  And so when he passed, there was no resentment.
• 34:30
  There was no regrets. All those negative stories was
• 34:33
  transformed into just love for my father.
• 34:38
  And, and I want people to have an opportunity, if they're
• 34:40
  willing, have an opportunity to have that relationship back with
• 34:44
  that parent. And that's that's a beautiful
• 34:46
  thing. So on a different note, there
• 34:49
  are some people that have been through now your worst is your
• 34:52
  worst, right? And there's been people been
• 34:55
  through molestation. Exactly, babe.
• 34:58
  All that kind of stuff. So I say this kind of like
• 35:02
  everybody has their I preached the message not too long ago
• 35:06
  about the boogeyman being under the bed.
• 35:09
  And now you look, finally you got courage to look and you
• 35:12
  realize that he wasn't there. But that doesn't mean you wasn't
• 35:15
  afraid, right? So some things never come to
• 35:18
  pass, right? Some things never.
• 35:20
  You know, you, you, you don't go through it.
• 35:23
  But my dad, man, and you said it a few moments ago, and my dad
• 35:28
  and my mom, they did the best they could for me.
• 35:31
  Yeah, I made some bad choices. I made some bad decisions, but
• 35:36
  that's not a fault on them. No, it's not.
• 35:40
  Because at the end of the day, every tub has to sit on his own
• 35:43
  bottom. Every man has to be I Oh, it's
• 35:46
  from the hood. I'm from.
• 35:49
  Yeah. We had raggedy books.
• 35:51
  We had teachers didn't really care about us.
• 35:53
  I could tell you probably tell you about 10 teachers, but it
• 35:56
  was one one that took it like and it told me he said, Julian,
• 36:00
  you're going to be somebody. Now you say something I rarely
• 36:04
  discuss with anybody and I haven't heard it.
• 36:06
  I had a half brother. He died of sickle cells, died of
• 36:10
  sickle cell and he came to see we've been estranged all his
• 36:13
  life. He was the child on the side
• 36:16
  right. I learned about him as a
• 36:19
  teenager so my sister who passed away she kept us got us all
• 36:24
  together. I seen him when he's little name
• 36:26
  is Trayvon. He passed away, but I have a
• 36:28
  trait now I've never but now I've seen in your PSA that in
• 36:34
  the PSA, especially professional athletes, it affect them
• 36:38
  different, but I'm. So.
• 36:40
  Determined to not let it hinder me.
• 36:43
  If you see me out on the basketball court, I mean, take
• 36:46
  my time. Outbreak, you know, and I'm a
• 36:48
  drink my Gatorade. Oh my gosh, I'm.
• 36:52
  Full of that and so I was told that at a early age what I when
• 36:57
  I courted my first wife this is my second marriage that I'm on
• 37:02
  and so my first wife I was like hey you know we making children
• 37:06
  you got sickle cell trait and she was like no, I don't have a
• 37:08
  trait you know so. Wow, this is this is This is why
• 37:13
  I don't do research because I'm I'm this is not planned.
• 37:17
  This is this is all unraveling right here live and and this
• 37:21
  conversation so. God's doing, Yes, exactly.
• 37:25
  Fires happened the, you know, Internet service and all of
• 37:29
  that. But we get to have this
• 37:30
  opportunity and I hope it's somebody that tunes in or play
• 37:33
  this back later can get something from this.
• 37:37
  The the last piece I want to touch him before we take this
• 37:40
  station identification break is that sibling love, right And and
• 37:45
  we know that the English language has a definition of
• 37:47
  love with so. Many.
• 37:48
  Oh yeah, absolutely. 10 definitions underneath it,
• 37:51
  right? But what I learned also when I
• 37:53
  was reconciled with my siblings was that Storegate love, right?
• 37:58
  And so that story love comes with a sense of obligation too,
• 38:03
  right? So sometimes as, as siblings,
• 38:07
  you know, we have to be able to go past that obligation to
• 38:11
  create that friendship love, because sometimes even as
• 38:13
  siblings, we're, we, we, we were disconnected, right?
• 38:17
  And so that was something that I learned when I learned that I
• 38:19
  took responsibility to start to reconnect with my sisters
• 38:23
  because we have different dads, same mom, but it was when I
• 38:27
  learned that it was like, Oh, that's what's missing.
• 38:29
  And someone has to be that big, you know, that person to say,
• 38:32
  Hey, I'm going to be the one to to have this gathering to create
• 38:36
  this space for us to get closer. Like you grew up in the same
• 38:38
  house, but we're not, we're not that friendship experience
• 38:43
  sometimes is not there. And so is there anything you
• 38:47
  want to speak to that part of relationships with our families
• 38:49
  as far as. You know, so with my family,
• 38:52
  again, because I'm the oldest, I know I'm not going to say make
• 38:57
  people do stuff, but I do it with love.
• 38:59
  Like, come on, this is what we're doing and fall in line,
• 39:02
  you know, with that. And if I had other people here
• 39:05
  telling you, they'll say, yeah, your brothers, they have nothing
• 39:08
  but mad respect for you. But like I just because I put in
• 39:11
  the work and I do that. But there was rocky rolls.
• 39:15
  There was time. We fell out over things in the
• 39:18
  past. But as you said, now I always
• 39:20
  say it like this. I'm dark skinned, so my face
• 39:24
  been black all my life, so I'm going to take the egg on my
• 39:28
  face. He's standing.
• 39:30
  So I'm going to be the one. Because when people fall out and
• 39:33
  you notice people take it to the grave, they I'm not.
• 39:37
  No, I'm deep dead to me. I'm not dealing with that, you
• 39:40
  know? Yeah, and I often tell this
• 39:44
  story about when people reconcile back together, all
• 39:48
  that time that you miss, you don't get that back.
• 39:51
  So if I'm standing here with an egg in my face just to get
• 39:54
  y'all. Because we come from the same
• 39:56
  people, the same upbringing, and the only one that's happy that
• 40:00
  we not getting along is the devil.
• 40:02
  Yep. They at each other and mad at
• 40:05
  each other. And the biggest thing that we
• 40:07
  can learn to do on this walk is have forgiveness.
• 40:10
  Every day the sun goes up and goes down, one is a new day to
• 40:14
  for tender mercies, for God's tender mercies to come to us.
• 40:18
  So I don't care what happened 1020 years ago.
• 40:20
  Now for those who've been molested and been touched, they
• 40:23
  need to get the professional help.
• 40:26
  Yes, you know, and we got to get rid of that type of the like I
• 40:32
  don't need. No one escapes it.
• 40:38
  No one escapes it. Yeah, so, but to to close out on
• 40:43
  your question, the my siblings, you know, I believe we're all in
• 40:47
  a good place. We're scattered, you know, we're
• 40:49
  not in the same place and we're all group text right now went to
• 40:54
  our mother. And so, you know, I'm just
• 40:57
  trying to do the best I can with that, but it hurts your parent
• 41:01
  declining before you. That's that's a hurtful thing.
• 41:04
  But I got to bear this cross. I have to thank you, yes.
• 41:10
  Sir, thank you. Thank you so much.
• 41:11
  I get it. I appreciate you for setting the
• 41:14
  foundation for this conversation because it's so important for
• 41:17
  people to hear these conversations and have an
• 41:20
  opportunity. A friend of mine said 10 seconds
• 41:25
  of your confidence could save somebody's life just by sharing
• 41:29
  an experience or just listening to them based off of what they
• 41:31
  could be dealing with. So again, thank you for for
• 41:35
  sharing your story with us. And we're going to take plays
• 41:37
  PSA's and come back and then we're going to get into if you
• 41:41
  played any sports and then what? And then what led you to the the
• 41:45
  signing up in the military of the Navy.
• 41:46
  So we thank you so much. Yes, Sir, you're welcome.
• 41:50
  All right, this is Frondosier right here on Trench Talk.
• 41:53
  Again, thanks for tuning this. And then we're going to come
• 41:55
  right back and get into some more dialogue right here on the
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  Botanicaherbalco.com All right, welcome back to the Frondosier
• 45:07
  show, also known as Trench Talk US yes, you can catch me on lit
• 45:13
  live GH3 Gaza Hip Hop on Saturdays at 7:00 PM and Sundays
• 45:20
  at 5:00 PM. This week's episode is dropping.
• 45:23
  Oh my goodness. I had a great conversation with
• 45:26
  a music artist myself and one way TK have brother Valentine on
• 45:29
  their man. He was it was not even an
• 45:32
  interview really. He was more preaching than
• 45:33
  anything. So that's where we play our
• 45:35
  Christian hip hop and we interview artists and then again
• 45:39
  to share their stories of their background and even how, you
• 45:42
  know, I asked about that walk. What was the turning point when
• 45:45
  they gave their life to Christ. And so if you want to follow
• 45:48
  that one as well, that's on lit live.
• 45:49
  Used to be dash radio. Now it's called Lit Live and
• 45:52
  it's GH3 Gods hip hop and you can catch us over there.
• 45:56
  The Revolution radio show is that broadcast over there?
• 45:59
  All right, let's get back to this this conversation because
• 46:03
  you, you, you. This, this whole sickle.
• 46:08
  Cell trade talk, man. The Air Force found my trade.
• 46:14
  I didn't know I was a carrier. I have a cousin Nigel with
• 46:18
  sickle cell disease on my dad's side.
• 46:20
  So I remember growing up with him being sick and you know,
• 46:22
  hanging out like that. But I never really had any
• 46:26
  problems that I didn't realize until after I collapsed and and
• 46:30
  had some complications and like I said, retired from the
• 46:33
  military medically and doing my research.
• 46:36
  I've had pain in my left arm since I was my mom would say 2
• 46:39
  years old. I remember being 5 and waking up
• 46:42
  as a child and my arm aching real bad and my grandmother hold
• 46:46
  me over the sink and running warm water over my arm.
• 46:48
  The only thing that soothe the pain 1975 they take me to the
• 46:52
  doctor oh, he's 5. He's growing pains.
• 46:55
  Well, I can say I'm. About to be 55.
• 46:57
  And I still have that same arm pain that I've had my whole
• 47:00
  life. And so in the research that we
• 47:03
  found that some people have sickle cell, sickle cell trait
• 47:07
  can have pain crisis similar to sickle cell disease, fatigue,
• 47:11
  dehydration. As you mentioned playing
• 47:14
  basketball, football, it seems to exasperate more to causing
• 47:20
  athletes to have sudden death. We've had all athletes have have
• 47:25
  can be affected by that. Even people just going to the
• 47:27
  gym hanging out and exercising. We're going to Denver, Co where
• 47:31
  the air is thin. We have complications.
• 47:33
  So that is what God showed me after I was in this space of my
• 47:39
  life is over and had suicide ideation and it was like I'm out
• 47:42
  of here. I might as well just nobody
• 47:44
  cares who's who's going to miss me.
• 47:47
  God show me that that sickle cell trade gene he gave me my
• 47:49
  mother's womb to deliver this message and so that's that was
• 47:54
  my what's next out of my transition out of the service
• 47:56
  right And then even going back to the biblical context of it.
• 48:00
  That's that we were born with these afflictions and sometimes
• 48:04
  they're they were born with those afflictions or sometimes
• 48:07
  you can watch too much CNN and TV could cause afflictions or
• 48:10
  environment can cause afflictions.
• 48:12
  But learning that that my trait was something that God gave me,
• 48:17
  I knew why I was born. Like the military career was
• 48:19
  just the basic to get me to where I was going to be for
• 48:23
  crisis. So for you to say that and share
• 48:26
  that, it's like I, I hadn't, I don't even know if Lisa knew
• 48:29
  that or what, but I had no idea that this conversation.
• 48:33
  Even. Was in your space like that so
• 48:36
  and I know the Navy test for it the Air Force Marines, but the
• 48:40
  Army before 2020 they were only tested for anemia.
• 48:45
  So you can join the service with with the trait, but you can't
• 48:47
  join with the type of sickle cell disease or anemia.
• 48:51
  But so the Army was but now I'm not saying I'm responsible for
• 48:55
  it but we've pushed enough a lot of conversations.
• 48:58
  So now they actually took a look at it, the Army, and now they're
• 49:01
  retesting all their soldiers and testing the new recruits for
• 49:05
  sickle cell trait to identify them because they have been
• 49:08
  collapsing and dying and having complications.
• 49:11
  So that that isn't the reconciliation.
• 49:14
  Forgiveness is my one and then the sickle cell trait is my
• 49:18
  number 2. So I'm very.
• 49:22
  I'm. I'm just shocked by your
• 49:24
  knowledge of that. So thank you.
• 49:26
  Absolutely. And thank you for what you do,
• 49:29
  you know, and what you're saying as far as other people being
• 49:34
  tested for it. Now that's that's a beautiful
• 49:37
  thing. So I got.
• 49:39
  I got. Two message here.
• 49:40
  One, I didn't play that. You have a very large family. 18
• 49:46
  grandbabies. Whoa, yeah.
• 49:53
  Yeah. I got I have three, I have
• 49:55
  three. I have a grandson and two
• 49:56
  granddaughters and they're between 5:00 and and two, so
• 50:01
  there I I can't even imagine having eighteen.
• 50:03
  Yeah, it's a beautiful. Thing to have them all around
• 50:07
  you to love on you and I soak up every moment yeah I get.
• 50:15
  Emotional. Just thinking.
• 50:16
  About it because I was a father. I've been a lot of things, a
• 50:21
  pastor, I've been a sailor. But I think that one paw, paw
• 50:27
  that just melts me, man, that just does something for me, man.
• 50:32
  And I've asked God to give me time to take care of myself, to
• 50:36
  eat right and all that. To see them grow up, yes.
• 50:40
  You know, I want to be the longest living grandfather on
• 50:43
  the planet. You know man, You, you, you.
• 50:47
  Say that as as again with my whole just being delivered from
• 50:52
  all this stuff in my the past and then having my dad pass away
• 50:58
  two weeks before my grandson was born.
• 51:01
  It was like like I even questioned God, like how much
• 51:05
  time I've got, you know, like, am I going to live long enough
• 51:08
  like this and that and I was like, man, God, I don't want to
• 51:10
  live like this man like I so I had to find my peace, another
• 51:14
  level of peace and death for myself to give me peace.
• 51:17
  And so I just went to God with it and he just showed me that
• 51:21
  Hey, your dad taught you how to live a sinless life, sinless,
• 51:25
  right. And so.
• 51:28
  A lot of things, even though I did the grievance.
• 51:30
  Classes and I because of those principles, I know that I live
• 51:32
  by principles, that I understand the principles.
• 51:35
  And so I knowing that those grief principles help, you know,
• 51:38
  manage that loss of my father. But like you said, when I helped
• 51:42
  my grandson, it was like, it's all yours, man, like the house,
• 51:46
  the money, the cars, like it's all yours.
• 51:50
  It's all your you can have it all.
• 51:52
  Yeah, I I didn't read a book. On being a parent when I was
• 51:56
  coming up, I did, I did what they did, what I was taught
• 52:00
  right now with these grandchildren, like I'll give
• 52:04
  you a good example. I have some that came from
• 52:06
  Arizona to be here with us this past Christmas holiday about a
• 52:09
  month. They were with us in Perris, CA
• 52:12
  and I told them, I said I sat them down.
• 52:16
  The oldest is 1110 and five of that that those that came from
• 52:20
  Arizona. I said, listen, this is paw.
• 52:24
  Paw is going to teach. There's no whoopings and we're
• 52:27
  not going to have no see this big.
• 52:29
  I used to call it bus driving belt because I drive a belt, but
• 52:32
  I used to drive buses for the city and I say we're not going
• 52:36
  to get no weapons. And you know, they all got out
• 52:38
  of there without getting whoopings because, you know, a
• 52:42
  lot of people believe in or if you spare the rod, you spoil the
• 52:46
  child. You know, sometimes it's like
• 52:50
  it's more than beating, you know, because I tell you now I'm
• 52:53
  here. But I'm saying almost every
• 52:55
  whooping I got, it was unjustified.
• 52:57
  It was fuck off. But you know, some of those
• 53:02
  whoopings, you know, I couldn't go out.
• 53:03
  I could see my friends on their skateboards and playing and
• 53:06
  stuff and I was on a punishment or whatever.
• 53:09
  So I things that they were trying to teach me and they
• 53:12
  didn't want me being on in prison on death row somewhere or
• 53:17
  head in a grave. So I'm saying curfew, you know,
• 53:21
  I understand why we got to do what we got to do.
• 53:25
  My little grandson is five. He want to ask why to everything
• 53:29
  just stick. Your ATM in the.
• 53:30
  Machine and dude, you got to have you're going to hurt at
• 53:35
  this point. Just take the car like my mom
• 53:39
  has and put it in here and get some money out.
• 53:43
  Dude it don't work. That money is to keep these
• 53:47
  lights on. That right there you'll.
• 53:50
  Get that you're going to. Learn.
• 53:52
  You're going to learn. You're going to learn.
• 53:54
  No, it's beautiful. You say that again.
• 53:57
  I, I teach you muscle intelligence and LA Unified and
• 54:00
  and soon to be in Palmdale. And again, it goes back to a lot
• 54:04
  of us, our parents grew up in that time where children will be
• 54:07
  seen and not heard. So you don't get no voice.
• 54:10
  You don't get you a child. You don't get no say so.
• 54:13
  But the other side of that is you want that child to be
• 54:16
  connected to you. You want that child to see you
• 54:19
  mess up. You want to go to that child
• 54:21
  because we do disappoint our children.
• 54:23
  We do make mistakes. And sometimes that child needs
• 54:25
  to really recognize that you're my dad or mom, but they're not
• 54:28
  perfect either. And allowing them to share what
• 54:32
  they're dealing with. And if they call me out on my
• 54:34
  stuff, hey, you know what, you right.
• 54:35
  I, I was being a jerk that day. And so I acknowledge that, but
• 54:39
  we don't realize that the what that does is that keeps that
• 54:41
  child connected to you and you may.
• 54:45
  Not have to whoop them. Because again, if you honor your
• 54:47
  father and mother, my my mentor says he never whooped his sons
• 54:51
  because they he asked him why didn't, why didn't I have to
• 54:54
  spank you? And he said they told him that
• 54:56
  when my friends went to go try to do something, steal candy or
• 54:59
  whatever, I thought about what is my mom and dad going to say?
• 55:04
  And they was like, when? I'm not going to mess that.
• 55:05
  Up between you and and me. So it was like, that's that
• 55:09
  honor of how I think about my parent.
• 55:12
  And if we cultivate that, I really believe, Bishop, that
• 55:16
  that is something that if we brought attention to that and
• 55:19
  and help people discover, rediscover that our families
• 55:23
  would come together on a whole nother level and our societies
• 55:26
  would change. Oh, yeah, I believe that.
• 55:28
  I really believe that. All right.
• 55:32
  Thank you for letting me share that.
• 55:33
  Yeah, absolutely. One more comment.
• 55:35
  Here is. He's the baller.
• 55:38
  Oh, that's my. So so what's up?
• 55:42
  With the ball instead. Did you play sports in high
• 55:44
  school at all? I did.
• 55:46
  But because I had to work, you know, I, I tell my wife.
• 55:50
  I've been taking care of. Family.
• 55:51
  Since I was a teenager. I had to take care of me, my mom
• 55:54
  and my sister when my dad wasn't there.
• 55:57
  Yeah. So I believe I had a promising
• 56:00
  career in baseball. Oh, man.
• 56:03
  And. And yes, a long story with that,
• 56:06
  but baseball, basketball and football and like that guy that
• 56:11
  just commented he's. The Sergeant first.
• 56:15
  Class here in the United States Army.
• 56:16
  That's why I work for it now. I work for Army.
• 56:19
  Really. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm S4.
• 56:23
  Yeah, I got a lot of. Friends, they act like.
• 56:25
  They like me. I was in a quartermaster.
• 56:27
  I was in. The I did supply too.
• 56:29
  Oh, OK. Yeah, we just got.
• 56:31
  New SFCS here, 92 alphas and Yankees.
• 56:35
  Yeah, I was a Yankee. Yeah, I'm a civilian.
• 56:39
  I'm just civilian. Just.
• 56:41
  Riding it in with them. Just come on, IG inspection.
• 56:45
  We just. Oh, no, I hated those.
• 56:47
  Yeah. If I turned.
• 56:49
  That stuff I don't miss. That's.
• 56:51
  What I don't miss, I'm glad it's over.
• 56:53
  That's why I'm just sitting here chilling.
• 56:55
  I'm glad it's over and we did the back brief.
• 56:58
  Everything's good. Got 100%.
• 57:00
  We knocked it out the park. Come on.
• 57:02
  But. Yeah, it was the.
• 57:04
  Teamwork that made the dream work so but even now several of
• 57:09
  us from the battalion here, we meet out up at a park in
• 57:12
  Temecula and we got a little captain this ball and he fought.
• 57:18
  I mean, stroke can get out. They all they good.
• 57:21
  Yeah. Got a couple 55 year olds out
• 57:24
  there man, and I, I still let them know man, that jump shot
• 57:27
  ain't fading yet. I got threes.
• 57:29
  I. Don't know, but yeah.
• 57:34
  They keep me young, they keep me young.
• 57:37
  These boys, they're good men and they doing well in their careers
• 57:41
  and well on their way. No doubt.
• 57:44
  I, I I picked. Up a a ABA basketball team and
• 57:48
  so I'm the owner of the Ventura County Orcas and soon to be
• 57:51
  coming the Riverside County Mavericks.
• 57:54
  OK, so that my chaser. Hoop.
• 57:56
  Dream now because I can't exercise from my you know
• 57:58
  military injuries yeah right right it is now I'm I'm.
• 58:01
  Connected to. These these players that I
• 58:03
  picked up and so you coaching or you just I'm.
• 58:07
  The I'm the owner. And pretty much I got, I got a
• 58:10
  coach and I got AGM. So I, you know, I'm in the mix a
• 58:12
  little bit. I'm trying to get away from it
• 58:14
  and let them do their thing. But it's the first season, so,
• 58:17
  you know, I got to make sure everything is running right.
• 58:20
  Yeah, exactly. Big Three.
• 58:22
  Yeah, yeah. So the ABA has got about. 150
• 58:24
  teams across the country. And so we, we, I have one active
• 58:29
  team right now and that really is a ministry because I prayed
• 58:33
  to God on how can I do this work and, and, and again to help men
• 58:37
  develop right. And so having these, you know,
• 58:41
  19 players, you hear all the dynamics of what's going on in
• 58:46
  their life and, and as and as veterans, as military veterans,
• 58:50
  you know, on my sports show, we talked, athletes are no
• 58:53
  different. When that jersey comes off or
• 58:55
  when that uniform comes off and you're lost, It's like, who am I
• 59:00
  outside of that jersey? And so my view was who was I
• 59:03
  outside of that uniform? That's right.
• 59:05
  So the relatedness is there. And so just helping them those
• 59:09
  are willing, you know, to listen and, and help develop.
• 59:12
  But that that's really why I purchased the team I have
• 59:15
  beautiful developed. Men like that so.
• 59:18
  That basketball so maybe I get you on my sports show one on
• 59:21
  Sunday night and have you come in and talk about the basketball
• 59:24
  days Oh absolutely yeah, in my. Park in my neighborhood in
• 59:29
  Paris, California. Long story short, I got a little
• 59:33
  nephew. He's 21 years of age.
• 59:34
  Remember I told you my sister, she passed.
• 59:37
  Well, we had our nephew, my nephew out at our house, but the
• 59:41
  streets was calling him. So he went down to LA and got
• 59:44
  all tatted up and oh wow, that. But he's in the county jail now
• 59:50
  and he's been in there same like forever man.
• 59:53
  But it's about a year and a half.
• 59:55
  But one of the things him and I used to do when he stayed with
• 59:58
  me in Paris, we played ball. I was looking at a video of us
• 1:00:02
  and he played ball and he keeps saying hunk when I get out we
• 1:00:05
  going to ball and blah but and he realizes the errors of his
• 1:00:09
  ways hit me a. Lawyer.
• 1:00:11
  I need a lawyer. And I'm like, just ride it out,
• 1:00:14
  man. Just ride it out.
• 1:00:15
  What he is accused of doing is foolish, but we all have to
• 1:00:20
  learn some mistakes that are things that we do ain't as
• 1:00:26
  drastic as some people. You shouldn't have to go to
• 1:00:28
  prison to learn a lesson. Exactly.
• 1:00:32
  Bug overdose right Exactly. Or the.
• 1:00:34
  Real life like the kid. Said I I don't steal because my
• 1:00:38
  relationship with your parent. So I keep telling him you're
• 1:00:42
  going to get out again. You know this tool was going to
• 1:00:45
  pass and it would be out here and them choices is going to
• 1:00:48
  come up on you again. Yo, man, come make this run to
• 1:00:51
  make this move with us. And you got to remember that
• 1:00:54
  feeling being helpless in that county jail.
• 1:00:57
  You nobody can get you out. You know, you got to do the time
• 1:01:01
  and they trying to throw the book at you and it ain't even no
• 1:01:04
  dead bodies on it. You know what I mean?
• 1:01:06
  You know, you know that that. That comes from me as as the
• 1:01:12
  unforeseen consequences. Like sometimes we have to be
• 1:01:15
  able to have people talk to people who have been through
• 1:01:18
  things in life so that you can check those unforeseen.
• 1:01:22
  Like when I bought this ABA team, I went to some guys who
• 1:01:25
  own teams. Like what was what was your
• 1:01:27
  experience in? So I could hear like, do I
• 1:01:29
  really want to buy this team? But imagine we did that for
• 1:01:32
  life, you know, and like we again, we join people, join
• 1:01:36
  gangs, but don't realize unforeseen consequence that can
• 1:01:40
  happen to you or just be in the. Car with somebody.
• 1:01:43
  That this is an unforeseen consequences.
• 1:01:45
  You can't go to jail, you can't get caught up.
• 1:01:47
  You can just by being in that environment and and to me, those
• 1:01:51
  are the unforeseen, you know, talks that if we just had the
• 1:01:55
  space for those so. That's to me, that's the.
• 1:01:59
  Important. All right.
• 1:02:02
  So so. What was going on that it was
• 1:02:08
  like, OK, I'm, I'm, I'm going to go join the service out of all
• 1:02:10
  the branches, you that you know, you picked the Navy, but what
• 1:02:13
  was going on in life that you was like, you know what, this is
• 1:02:15
  my this is my way. So my option here in my senior
• 1:02:21
  year. My senior year, remember, I told
• 1:02:24
  you I was part of a little clique?
• 1:02:25
  Yeah, right. So everybody was smoking weed
• 1:02:29
  and drinking every day, right? That was.
• 1:02:32
  The We didn't grew up. In the same.
• 1:02:33
  Environment. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:02:35
  What y'all was doing on y'all block, he was doing right.
• 1:02:38
  Wow. And one of my counselors told me
• 1:02:41
  because I was cutting class all out at Santa Monica Pier,
• 1:02:44
  hanging out, doing dumb stuff, going to people's ditch parties
• 1:02:48
  and stuff like that. And so she said, hey, you, you
• 1:02:52
  keep missing these classes, you're going to mess around and
• 1:02:54
  not graduate. And she was like, this is the
• 1:02:57
  way out for you. So the military came and they
• 1:03:00
  did the ASVAB test and let me go.
• 1:03:02
  I might pass the test. I don't know.
• 1:03:04
  I went in there and I passed the test.
• 1:03:08
  Eventually I got the results and I passed.
• 1:03:10
  And everybody said, hey, you want to cut your hair?
• 1:03:14
  And I was like, you know what, forget this hair.
• 1:03:17
  So me and my family, we had a falling out.
• 1:03:20
  And so I end up staying with, I wrote about it in my book.
• 1:03:23
  I stayed with the family on my block down the street from me.
• 1:03:28
  And it was all of us in the house, like all these brothers,
• 1:03:32
  my friends all like brothers. And we used to be having so much
• 1:03:36
  craziness as kids. But I told them I was going to
• 1:03:40
  the service and they were like you crazy and this, this and
• 1:03:45
  that. So but I had to get that diploma
• 1:03:47
  and so I had to walk across that stage because I was motivated by
• 1:03:52
  negativity. They was telling me I wasn't see
• 1:03:54
  when I went around the corner and stay.
• 1:03:56
  I didn't have to go to school. Nobody going to school.
• 1:03:59
  I don't know if my friends today got DD or nothing, but I still
• 1:04:03
  went to school. And I got that.
• 1:04:06
  And I remember and I invited my mother and her sister, my aunt
• 1:04:11
  and a couple other people that came to my graduation.
• 1:04:14
  And my daddy came, but he was loaded.
• 1:04:17
  And I heard him say my name Julie, and and I saw him, he
• 1:04:21
  said, I told you I was going to make it.
• 1:04:23
  I threw my hands up. I was like, I graduated.
• 1:04:26
  I'm grown now and I'm grown grown.
• 1:04:29
  And yeah, so I got that diploma that gave me a going away
• 1:04:33
  farewell to boot camp thing for the July the 4th and July the
• 1:04:38
  5th, 87. I was on Amtrak headed to San
• 1:04:41
  Diego. Those days are etched in my
• 1:04:43
  mind. My daddy been through boot camp.
• 1:04:45
  So when I got there, he was like, all right, you keep your
• 1:04:48
  mouth shut, Dollar dude to tell you, you know?
• 1:04:50
  But he was there and me and his relationship did a 180° change
• 1:04:57
  from that. He started respecting me like
• 1:04:59
  the man that I really. Yeah, it changed.
• 1:05:04
  Wow. Amen.
• 1:05:06
  Glory, glory. And so, yeah, our relationship,
• 1:05:09
  it changed and yeah, yeah. And then just became better.
• 1:05:14
  We had that in common. Yeah, yeah, you had that in
• 1:05:17
  common. That really been this.
• 1:05:19
  He only did. Three years he got an honorable
• 1:05:21
  discharge and I was like my first contract was up.
• 1:05:24
  I re enlisted. You know, I'm like, whatever you
• 1:05:27
  do, I'm gonna do, he got. Out of E4 I got out of.
• 1:05:31
  E5 you know and yeah, so let's. Let's let's talk about some of
• 1:05:36
  that, that process, you know, the transition from your
• 1:05:42
  environment to that basic training.
• 1:05:48
  Like what was that like? Was it a culture shock for you
• 1:05:50
  or, or was was your environment prepared you for it?
• 1:05:53
  It it was a culture shock for the.
• 1:05:54
  Simple fact that when I stayed at home, when I was at home, my
• 1:05:58
  mother did everything. I could just throw laundry on
• 1:06:01
  the ground and she'd take care of it.
• 1:06:04
  I didn't have to make up no bed. I didn't have to do nothing.
• 1:06:06
  I'm gone. Go wherever I had to go.
• 1:06:09
  So when I got to boot camp, that was like, hey, you standing by
• 1:06:11
  this mess right here, You know, I had to tuck them sheets in,
• 1:06:15
  had to pull them blankets, right?
• 1:06:17
  Had to fold them tiles. And I was like, man, show miss
• 1:06:20
  my Mama. I just put The Dirty clothes on
• 1:06:23
  the floor. So you coming in and scoop it
• 1:06:25
  up. So that was the coach's name.
• 1:06:27
  You know, on a different note, using the restroom with 75 other
• 1:06:31
  men I never really like in junior high, right.
• 1:06:35
  Hey I. Just go.
• 1:06:37
  Funky, you know what I mean? Yeah.
• 1:06:42
  So that that was the. Main thing and and somebody told
• 1:06:47
  me one of them recruited one of them coming to come out and say
• 1:06:50
  your Mama ain't here boy, but. I was.
• 1:06:56
  I had a fire. Burning inside of me like I'm
• 1:06:58
  not going to quit. I, I can't quit and I had a hard
• 1:07:03
  time running. I, I used to play sports and
• 1:07:05
  stuff. So my senior year I signed up
• 1:07:08
  for cross country cross allowed me to run distance and I still
• 1:07:12
  got good legs today where I can run and I have slow pace.
• 1:07:16
  I ain't no, I ain't going to burn nothing down with no speed,
• 1:07:19
  but I can, you know, and just do it and I still do that.
• 1:07:23
  I did it since this new year started, I started lightly
• 1:07:27
  jogging again lightly. I'm just doing work up a little
• 1:07:31
  lather, little sweat and that's pretty much it.
• 1:07:34
  Just trying to be healthy. Go to the VA every six months
• 1:07:37
  get checked out, make sure everything right.
• 1:07:40
  Keep pushing What what what would you say your.
• 1:07:43
  Most memorable experience in the Navy for yourself like when you
• 1:07:47
  when you sit back and think about like man, that was a good
• 1:07:51
  get my deployments. My, my deployments, my
• 1:07:57
  deployments and, and I'll give you a good example.
• 1:08:01
  Two things. One, I had a stomach problem.
• 1:08:04
  I don't know whether cramp or something.
• 1:08:06
  It was hurting real bad. And we were having Bible study
• 1:08:09
  and prayer groups. And so when we went to Desert
• 1:08:13
  Shield, Desert Storm, that's when guys got serious.
• 1:08:18
  It wasn't no playing cards. None of that dudes were sick.
• 1:08:21
  And that night we had this guy called, the religious Petty
• 1:08:23
  Officer would come on and say a prayer.
• 1:08:26
  And I was like, oh, this for real?
• 1:08:30
  This for real scriptures. But my friend, he said, man, you
• 1:08:35
  mind, I'm going to pray for you. He said, I know you want to go
• 1:08:38
  to sick Bay. I said, yeah, I can't breathe.
• 1:08:40
  I'm having a hard time breathe. And he said just trust me, I'm
• 1:08:43
  going to pray. Pray over me.
• 1:08:44
  And he prayed over me. And I was like, thank you, bro.
• 1:08:47
  And I was sitting there and he said you ain't going to have to
• 1:08:50
  go to sick Bay. And I was like, yeah, I'm going
• 1:08:52
  to go in the morning. But in the morning I don't have
• 1:08:55
  that pain no more. Wow.
• 1:08:58
  I got to thinking like. Man and I became good friends
• 1:09:01
  and I became his godfather to one of his children.
• 1:09:04
  We, you know, we lost time over the years, but I always say
• 1:09:07
  because of that and then this other dude I was hanging around
• 1:09:11
  with, he was my one and two, right?
• 1:09:13
  Everywhere you saw me, we just getting in the mischievous
• 1:09:16
  things together and he found Christ.
• 1:09:19
  So when he found Christ, I was like, man, what you doing right?
• 1:09:26
  And so finally one day I went down there and they all stood,
• 1:09:31
  all these men down there, they started clapping.
• 1:09:33
  They said wow came. Out and we've been praying.
• 1:09:36
  For you your friend loved you so much he wants you to get saved
• 1:09:41
  and that they gonna in a ship store room.
• 1:09:45
  What? And yeah, and, and my life and
• 1:09:49
  literally has been different. Even when I tried to go back to
• 1:09:53
  wiling out and tried to go back to that, I couldn't and go there
• 1:09:58
  and stay there. Like, that's why I belong,
• 1:10:00
  Right? Right, right.
• 1:10:02
  Ice. I was the guy.
• 1:10:03
  In the club and people was like you don't belong here it you
• 1:10:10
  reverend. I was like, man, ain't no
• 1:10:11
  reverend. I'm a drunk, you know what I
• 1:10:13
  mean? But yeah, so that's that took.
• 1:10:18
  Place in the Navy? Yeah, that all took place in the
• 1:10:21
  Navy. Man, wow, you got me.
• 1:10:23
  Going down memory lane. Hey, that's where we going.
• 1:10:26
  That's where we. Going.
• 1:10:30
  Today, looking back. Yeah.
• 1:10:32
  So today, looking back at your career, what would you tell a
• 1:10:36
  young teenager or someone who's you know, that you come across
• 1:10:40
  and says, hey, I'm not interested in joining the
• 1:10:42
  military. What would be your conversation
• 1:10:45
  to that young woman? Or male.
• 1:10:48
  Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, you.
• 1:10:50
  You got to want it and if you wanted the branches, I'm going
• 1:10:54
  to just say all the military. The military is good too.
• 1:10:56
  It's men and women now. I see it first hand here.
• 1:11:00
  I have never met so many career minded 20 year people
• 1:11:04
  automatically going to 20 in year 2.
• 1:11:07
  They're like I'm going all the way.
• 1:11:09
  Like wow, we always talked about getting out.
• 1:11:12
  I got a EOS date. I got.
• 1:11:16
  So if that's what you want to do, if this is what you want to
• 1:11:20
  do, then I, I'm a firm believer that the military is a good
• 1:11:23
  route to take. You know, if you put me in a
• 1:11:26
  group full of young men and women right now, because that's
• 1:11:30
  the route that I took and I know because I I'm seeing how my
• 1:11:34
  stepson just bought a house 10 years in living in Hemet, CA and
• 1:11:39
  I'm seeing how my other stepson is doing well because of the
• 1:11:43
  military. Now it's not for everybody,
• 1:11:46
  right? So I mean, because somebody
• 1:11:48
  going to tell you what to do and where to go.
• 1:11:50
  Now you can get a little rank and you going to be able to tell
• 1:11:52
  people right too. But it's.
• 1:11:54
  It's a pecking. Order to this thing but I I I'm
• 1:11:57
  I'm pro military yeah I got. Into a little disagreement.
• 1:12:01
  With someone not too long ago, it was like, how could you be
• 1:12:04
  patriotic and all this and all that?
• 1:12:06
  I said, you know what, my plight here with the African Americans,
• 1:12:10
  however I got here, I got here, you know, God.
• 1:12:15
  But the you know what? We're going.
• 1:12:19
  To have some good talks. We're going to have some good
• 1:12:21
  talks offline because I got a whole, I had a whole
• 1:12:24
  conversation that the Holy Spirit gave me about the Moses
• 1:12:27
  and the Israelites and that transition and, and how I
• 1:12:30
  believe our African community still deals with some of that
• 1:12:34
  that we carry and that I wasn't in that I wasn't in that
• 1:12:38
  environment. So I have no problem with none
• 1:12:40
  that I acknowledge it, but I don't have and my grandparents
• 1:12:45
  was in that environment. So, but for me, you know, like
• 1:12:49
  the Israelites, they, they, they, that's that 40 year walk
• 1:12:52
  that next generation came in and they were able.
• 1:12:55
  To go into the promised. Land.
• 1:12:56
  But I can imagine going to the promised land with all that
• 1:13:00
  Egypt in your mind and your heart when you got to go to that
• 1:13:04
  new environment and you got to create everything from scratch
• 1:13:06
  and you complaining about where you came from like that was
• 1:13:09
  like, and they made sense to me, like why?
• 1:13:12
  Why God? Didn't allow that.
• 1:13:13
  To happen because of their hearts was still yeah in Egypt
• 1:13:18
  and. So.
• 1:13:18
  I believe that our conversation is still kind of like that
• 1:13:21
  today, Absolutely. So the biggest?
• 1:13:23
  Thing and it's not to get too deep off into a Deuteronomy,
• 1:13:27
  Deuteronomy, right? Deuteronomy, yeah, this speaks
• 1:13:30
  blessings and curses. And I believe that all people
• 1:13:34
  are cursed if they do the 1st 14 scriptures, you know, they that
• 1:13:40
  because those are the curses that are on the people.
• 1:13:43
  And then he talks about the blessings and it's today you and
• 1:13:47
  I and those that are like us will live the life of a blessed
• 1:13:51
  life if things right. So I mean, it's right there in
• 1:13:56
  it's there for us. And you know, you, you just as
• 1:14:01
  I, each day that I get older, you know, I believe it comes
• 1:14:05
  with a level of maturity. And just like Lord, I accept,
• 1:14:09
  you know, like I said, I I couldn't pick the Cosby.
• 1:14:12
  I wouldn't want the Cosby. I don't want him to be my dad.
• 1:14:17
  Anyway, but I remember I used to watch 80s enough stuff like and.
• 1:14:24
  I you know the. Biggest knock on my childhood is
• 1:14:28
  I used to see people eat at the table with the kids, and we
• 1:14:31
  never had that in my house. But I was the little kid.
• 1:14:34
  If me and you was in the same neighborhood, I get to be your
• 1:14:37
  friend, I'll be at your dinner table.
• 1:14:40
  So I saw other families do it right.
• 1:14:42
  Well, we did. Yeah, we did.
• 1:14:44
  We didn't. We didn't do it right.
• 1:14:46
  Yeah. You know my friend dad took me
• 1:14:49
  to a Dodger game and how I became.
• 1:14:52
  A Dodger fan. And, and me and my friend used
• 1:14:56
  to go to the Dodger game and his dad would take us.
• 1:14:59
  And I try to go every year to Dodger Stadium.
• 1:15:02
  Yeah, good team or a bad team because it's childhood memories
• 1:15:06
  for sure. Yeah, I want to acknowledge my.
• 1:15:09
  S4 who is watching right now? That's him right there.
• 1:15:13
  Douglas Landy So. Yeah, I was.
• 1:15:18
  I was. National Guard first, OK, I
• 1:15:21
  wanted to go active duty but my uncle who was in the Air Force
• 1:15:23
  Reserve said go part time first because if you don't like it and
• 1:15:27
  you go full time first, you stuck for the amount of years,
• 1:15:30
  right? So I went to the Guard and then
• 1:15:34
  about my 4th year went to my fifth year, the Guard.
• 1:15:37
  I was like, I think I could do this.
• 1:15:39
  And so I walked into the Army one day in Inglewood and they
• 1:15:42
  had this clipboard with all these AGR jobs on there.
• 1:15:46
  And so I asked my, my, my Brandon Cincio say, hey, are
• 1:15:51
  there any jobs available? He's like, yeah, there's some on
• 1:15:52
  the board that's they're closing like in two or three days.
• 1:15:55
  So I looked up there and it was a supply clerk and I was like, I
• 1:15:59
  looked at it and I was like, I could do that.
• 1:16:02
  And I gave it to him. He's I'm like, what do I need?
• 1:16:03
  He's like, dude, this is due, I think it was the 27th of
• 1:16:06
  December. It was due like the 30th.
• 1:16:09
  And he was like, you need. You.
• 1:16:10
  Need this, the picture, blah blah blah.
• 1:16:12
  And I was like, all right, cool. I went.
• 1:16:14
  I put it all together. He helped me out.
• 1:16:16
  I submitted it and lo and behold, when I went to that unit
• 1:16:20
  for the interview, starting first class, Landy was my S4.
• 1:16:27
  So he picked me up as the AGR. I was the HAC supply clerk as
• 1:16:34
  AE4, and he was the S4. And then we traveled.
• 1:16:39
  Oh yeah, yeah, we. Traveled doing supplies.
• 1:16:41
  And everything. Yeah, yeah, I did a little
• 1:16:43
  travelling. I'm grateful for him.
• 1:16:45
  He's he saw something in me and one of my friends was like, you
• 1:16:49
  got to learn what the 2064 is. I'm like, what is that?
• 1:16:51
  It's a hand receipt. So I go in there like I know
• 1:16:54
  what I'm talking about. He's like, do you know anything
• 1:16:55
  about supply? I'm, I'm a fuel handler at the
• 1:16:57
  time, truck driver and I'm trying to act like I know about
• 1:17:01
  supply. It was, he was like, do you know
• 1:17:03
  anything? I'm like, he's like, good.
• 1:17:06
  You don't have no bad habits. I could teach you what I need
• 1:17:09
  you to know. And from there we've been
• 1:17:11
  talking. Here we are in in 2025 and that
• 1:17:13
  was 1994. So 1990.
• 1:17:16
  Yeah, 1994. Wow.
• 1:17:18
  Wow. That's amazing.
• 1:17:20
  Yeah, 94. So I have a prayer line on
• 1:17:23
  Friday. Nights and some of the guys on
• 1:17:26
  the prayer line are former soldiers and blah fuck shop
• 1:17:33
  after prayer. And it is amazing.
• 1:17:37
  People that God is putting together, you know, as you say,
• 1:17:40
  in the trenches, that's a beautiful trenches, yes.
• 1:17:43
  All right, before we get out of here and wrap this this episode
• 1:17:46
  up, all right. We know that, our brothers.
• 1:17:49
  And sisters. Have a a a challenge in their
• 1:17:53
  transition out of the service? Yes.
• 1:17:55
  I've interviewed a lot of my brothers and sisters that was
• 1:17:59
  homeless when they joined the service, did their eight-year
• 1:18:03
  career, whatever amount of years got out of the service and went
• 1:18:06
  right back to the mindset that they had before they joined me.
• 1:18:10
  Back to being. Homeless and having all these
• 1:18:12
  different challenges as I got opened up the show, 1 of the
• 1:18:16
  main things is that camaraderie again, this the belonging that
• 1:18:21
  we think we didn't get from our environment.
• 1:18:23
  We get it from the military, all of it.
• 1:18:26
  It feeds all of the positive and the negative.
• 1:18:29
  You know that, that we experience and then when for
• 1:18:33
  like for myself, when, when that order came down that I was going
• 1:18:37
  to receive a medical retirement, I had made it mean my life is
• 1:18:42
  over. And my subconscious mind started
• 1:18:44
  collecting all the evidence of why my life is over.
• 1:18:47
  My, my marriage failed, my car broke down.
• 1:18:52
  Like it was just collecting evidence of why my life was over
• 1:18:57
  and having the ideations of those anxiety and depression and
• 1:19:03
  all of that as I shared that what's.
• 1:19:07
  Next, we believe. That that helping that soldier
• 1:19:10
  define or find out what that what's next is for you.
• 1:19:13
  What was that transition coming out of the Navy?
• 1:19:20
  Well, thinking about, you know, what was next for you.
• 1:19:22
  Yeah. So.
• 1:19:25
  Then being transparent, right? Being like 100% honest.
• 1:19:30
  When I got out the service, I was I was four O everything,
• 1:19:37
  high, high, high Marks and everything.
• 1:19:41
  And I originally got out the service to join LAPDI wanted to
• 1:19:47
  be a different kind of officer in my community.
• 1:19:54
  Remember I said I was a Dodger fan?
• 1:19:56
  And I remember one year the cops gave me some Dodger Ball
• 1:20:01
  baseball cards. I remember having them up on my
• 1:20:04
  wall and every time we to see the cops, we'd be like, hey, you
• 1:20:08
  got some of them. Cars, did they pass out cars
• 1:20:11
  back then? Did they pass out baseball cards
• 1:20:14
  back then when I was. I think I remember that, Yeah,
• 1:20:17
  yeah. I.
• 1:20:18
  Think I remember that. Go ahead.
• 1:20:20
  Cars and put them up on my wall. And I wanted to be a cop to help
• 1:20:25
  people, but being transparent when I got.
• 1:20:30
  Out the service I got. Accepted into the police Academy
• 1:20:33
  and I had a start date for the Academy and I picked up from
• 1:20:39
  Desert Shield Desert Storm. Anger picked up anger and it
• 1:20:46
  cost me 6. Months of my.
• 1:20:47
  Life while I had to do time. Oh my God.
• 1:20:52
  And while I was doing time. And being all God's honest, a
• 1:20:57
  veteran came to me and I haven't heard about and he said, bro, I
• 1:21:01
  know you, I know you in a bad predicament right now.
• 1:21:06
  But he said keep calling that name.
• 1:21:10
  Jesus. Because I kept saying, Jesus,
• 1:21:12
  why I got to go this route, you know?
• 1:21:16
  But yeah. I got the letter.
• 1:21:20
  I didn't make it in, I didn't get to go to the Academy and my
• 1:21:24
  wife, the ex-wife, she left me. I got something better for me
• 1:21:30
  down the line. Scripture that I live by and we
• 1:21:33
  know that all things work together for the.
• 1:21:37
  Called according. To his purpose.
• 1:21:40
  I didn't want to have to go through what I went through, but
• 1:21:45
  going through it allowed me to, on that journey to meet the
• 1:21:49
  beautifulest woman ever. That's my wife and we went over
• 1:21:55
  20, three years. That's what she that's what she
• 1:21:58
  put up there. Three years.
• 1:22:04
  And she saw me being feeble, she saw me in my victories, she saw
• 1:22:11
  me in my defeats, right. And through her own good wisdom,
• 1:22:17
  she stayed there with me. And so that's the thing that how
• 1:22:23
  it all worked together for the good like you found.
• 1:22:27
  Your calling in. Life, my calling wasn't to be a
• 1:22:31
  cop, it was to be a gospel preacher.
• 1:22:36
  Preach in season, out of season, teach.
• 1:22:42
  And that's what I'm going to do until I don't have no more
• 1:22:45
  strength in my body. 2009, I went through cancer.
• 1:22:50
  I had cancer in my body. I ate there in that bed with
• 1:22:54
  tears roaming down my eyes and I said, God, if you give me my
• 1:22:58
  strength, that will serve you all the days of my life.
• 1:23:01
  Sir, I'm on this line today because somebody said, as you as
• 1:23:06
  a veteran, come and tell. I said, I'll tell the story.
• 1:23:08
  I never get tired of telling the story.
• 1:23:10
  You understand? There's no cancer in my body
• 1:23:12
  when they check. No, I can't.
• 1:23:14
  And I give him that. I give him the glory that I got
• 1:23:18
  to ride or die that puts up with me when I'm.
• 1:23:23
  Rudy right? Rudy right.
• 1:23:25
  Rudy Right. I, I like.
• 1:23:28
  I need space. You understand what I'm saying?
• 1:23:30
  Wow. Yeah, I, I.
• 1:23:33
  Was just being scripture earlier I'm.
• 1:23:35
  I'm through. After this 30, No, you're good.
• 1:23:37
  Yeah. Jeremiah was known in the Bible.
• 1:23:41
  The Bible says as the weeping prophet and the people that he
• 1:23:45
  was preaching to at that time, similar to Times Now, they want
• 1:23:49
  to do anything and everything. So he was saying there's
• 1:23:52
  consequences for this. And the enemy did come in and
• 1:23:56
  take the people, but he was weeping.
• 1:23:59
  He was like, I need y'all to get this, and that's my job today.
• 1:24:04
  Because we got Teslas, we got cyber trucks, yeah, but we got
• 1:24:09
  none of that is going with us when we get up.
• 1:24:13
  Whether you. Look at Pacific Palisades Val
• 1:24:17
  $1,000,000 Homes is no different than a cardboard box on Skid
• 1:24:21
  Row. Yeah, yeah.
• 1:24:25
  And people. Are angry and upset and somebody
• 1:24:28
  heads got a carry bass to marry You hear that?
• 1:24:32
  Yeah. But it's like.
• 1:24:35
  If it wasn't no neglect or no nothing like that, then it's
• 1:24:38
  just like the earth. When the earth starts shaking,
• 1:24:42
  who are you going? To blame.
• 1:24:44
  Blame her for that. Governor Newsom for that.
• 1:24:48
  So. So yeah.
• 1:24:49
  All that man, all myself like. All of them.
• 1:24:53
  Have been designed for greater comebacks.
• 1:24:56
  You know, I agree. I can't.
• 1:24:58
  Have it back. Even even disrespection people
• 1:25:02
  was running around. I'm like, if you know those
• 1:25:05
  stuff, you know your stuff. It's not my first rodeo, man.
• 1:25:10
  Yeah, you know, not my first rodeo.
• 1:25:13
  They they gave me the answers to the test.
• 1:25:15
  I got the reservations right here.
• 1:25:18
  I got them. But in the moment.
• 1:25:21
  In the moment. Of that it's like oh man yeah
• 1:25:25
  some inspection was no good yeah yeah you know but it you.
• 1:25:29
  Can't exhale once it's done, you know.
• 1:25:33
  We trying. To get the LMS right now to take
• 1:25:35
  us over for some some ribs or something.
• 1:25:41
  Hard work. Done bro.
• 1:25:43
  Let's let's celebrate. But yeah.
• 1:25:46
  This this, Richard said. Thank you for your time, man.
• 1:25:49
  I I have truly shouts out the least Lisa has put has given me
• 1:25:54
  introduces on people. I I had no idea how they were.
• 1:25:58
  It was going to play out as far as the conversation on God's
• 1:26:01
  work. Yeah.
• 1:26:02
  Thank you. She is.
• 1:26:04
  She is, She is. What do you want?
• 1:26:09
  To say I want to say everybody under the sound.
• 1:26:14
  Of my voice need to know as they personal savior you need to know
• 1:26:18
  that if he did it for me, he could do it for you.
• 1:26:22
  You know what I mean? God is so good.
• 1:26:24
  I say that sometimes with tears in my eyes, sometimes pain
• 1:26:29
  breathing in my body, in my back, but God is so good.
• 1:26:33
  And so that's my life. That's the life that I'm living
• 1:26:36
  in. I would pray that something that
• 1:26:39
  was said on this time that we were online.
• 1:26:41
  They say, you know what, whether you reach out to me, reach out
• 1:26:45
  to somebody on this line or some to have that personal
• 1:26:49
  relationship, our Lord and Savior of Jesus Christ.
• 1:26:54
  That's what I was saying. I I have.
• 1:26:56
  I have nothing. Else to add to that, there's a
• 1:26:58
  comment from your wife that said that that takes a loving God and
• 1:27:01
  his people and walk in the obedience to God.
• 1:27:04
  That was from a conversation we was having earlier.
• 1:27:07
  Amen. Again, thank.
• 1:27:09
  You for your time, Sir. I, like I said, I'm so honored
• 1:27:12
  to have you here. I look forward to talking to you
• 1:27:14
  outside of these conversations here on the line.
• 1:27:18
  But then we can do it. Yeah.
• 1:27:19
  For sure, for sure. Thank you.
• 1:27:21
  Thank you. Yes, you're more than welcome.
• 1:27:22
  God bless you. God bless you.
• 1:27:24
  I appreciate you so much. Thank you.
• 1:27:26
  Thank you. All right.
• 1:27:28
  This is. Wow, another episode of Trench
• 1:27:32
  Talk. Shout out to Douglas Landing
• 1:27:34
  man. I appreciate you for tuning in
• 1:27:36
  all the way from the ATL out that way.
• 1:27:40
  And for all those of you again who stayed in for this 90 minute
• 1:27:44
  segment of Trench Talk, I hope that you.
• 1:27:47
  Are been able to. Take something away.
• 1:27:49
  If you want to be a guest, you're more than welcome to
• 1:27:52
  message me again at Faron Dossier on Facebook, Twitter,
• 1:27:57
  Instagram, all the social media platforms.
• 1:27:59
  You can find me there again at farond.com.
• 1:28:01
  If you want to find out more information about the stuff that
• 1:28:04
  I'm up to in the community. My sickle cell trade talk is of
• 1:28:07
  course at wdcoandsct.org. And again, again, everything is
• 1:28:12
  pretty much there on those two websites.
• 1:28:13
  And what I'm up to, you can find me there.
• 1:28:17
  We'll be figuring out. The next week's guest, I do my
• 1:28:21
  shows by week to week again. So I will be looking for another
• 1:28:25
  guest next week to have a conversation or if I end up
• 1:28:29
  having to just a discussion, I've got something to talk about
• 1:28:33
  on my own. I will do that as well.
• 1:28:35
  But again, I want to play this last piece.
• 1:28:39
  It's about four minutes. This is called.
• 1:28:42
  What? He's a Korean.
• 1:28:43
  Era veteran. And then April, he'll be 91 and
• 1:28:49
  in at the 9th. He graduated UCLA in 1957 and
• 1:28:55
  was on this healing path from his own life, as you'll see in
• 1:29:00
  this video. And I've been working with him
• 1:29:02
  the last eight years and he has his own curriculum.
• 1:29:06
  He's been teaching mindfulness in the 60s before there was
• 1:29:11
  therapy sessions and group therapy.
• 1:29:12
  He was doing these conversations back then.
• 1:29:15
  And so I just want to acknowledge him for allowing me
• 1:29:18
  to be a part of his curriculum. I will.
• 1:29:20
  I have utilized it already in the LA Unified School District.
• 1:29:23
  Some of these conversations I share here, but I want.
• 1:29:29
  For our veterans, you know my. My my contribution and my
• 1:29:33
  relatedness is the veteran suicide and and now even you've
• 1:29:36
  suicide, right? So I just want you to listen to
• 1:29:39
  this PSA and then we'll get out of here.
• 1:29:42
  This is trench talk for Rondo Zier.
• 1:29:45
  Shout us out. The most compelling?
• 1:29:51
  Social need of humans is to belong.
• 1:29:58
  All four of my grandparents were.
• 1:30:00
  Born slaves, my father's father. He was seven years old and sold
• 1:30:06
  away from everything and everybody he knew.
• 1:30:11
  He never again saw any member of his family.
• 1:30:17
  My father, he's born in. 1884 His mother had died in
• 1:30:22
  childbirth and he raised himself from age 8.
• 1:30:29
  The sheriff came with his posse. Took my father and my oldest
• 1:30:33
  brother and beat them. My father died with scars on his
• 1:30:37
  back from that beating if the. Sheriff puts you in.
• 1:30:42
  Jail in a Jim Crow S Where do you turn to seek justice?
• 1:30:50
  I love school. I it became a source of me
• 1:30:55
  finding myself when I'd graduated.
• 1:30:58
  From USA in 19. 57 and was never even able to get an interview.
• 1:31:02
  No Jews, no Negroes, no Hispanics, no Orientals need
• 1:31:09
  apply. Now what do I do?
• 1:31:16
  Boy, you add. Color to our faculty.
• 1:31:19
  That's that's all we're interested in.
• 1:31:21
  All the other councils were instructed to give me their
• 1:31:25
  failing seniors, dopers, rebels, suicidals, listening to 12th
• 1:31:32
  graders who were not going to graduate.
• 1:31:34
  They told me what was going on in their lives.
• 1:31:36
  I discovered that I had something to offer people that I
• 1:31:40
  thought had everything. Wood was already out on the
• 1:31:44
  campus, that the skinny black dude was cool.
• 1:31:47
  I've got all these kids who want.
• 1:31:48
  To talk to me. And I don't have the time to see
• 1:31:50
  them. I think I might be able to see
• 1:31:52
  everybody if I saw them in groups individual.
• 1:31:56
  Psychotherapy. On a couch was the only method
• 1:31:58
  skinny black dude wanted to do. Groups you can't do.
• 1:32:02
  That. Because it doesn't exist.
• 1:32:05
  To hell with them, let's do it anyway.
• 1:32:09
  Parents want to know what are you?
• 1:32:10
  Doing to bring about this reaction to my kid.
• 1:32:13
  I've been sending my kids to the best psychiatrist in Southern
• 1:32:15
  California and this hasn't happened.
• 1:32:19
  This shit works. Developing adolescence without
• 1:32:25
  narcotics is a radical new national idea.
• 1:32:29
  Oh, you know you can't do that. Alternative school that includes
• 1:32:35
  sensitivity the mental health needs of our students.
• 1:32:39
  This is too big for you would. You be willing to train my.
• 1:32:43
  Managers. Yeah, who's called?
• 1:32:46
  Williams. He hasn't.
• 1:32:47
  Published anything 22 Iraq Afghan veterans committing
• 1:32:53
  suicide every day. I think I know who these young
• 1:32:58
  people. Are Mr. Williams?
• 1:33:01
  You don't want to touch. This You don't know who we are,
• 1:33:07
  Mr. Williams and I said. Yes, I know.
• 1:33:11
  Who you are? Maybe you don't know who you
• 1:33:13
  are. Did your parents encounter
• 1:33:16
  racism? Oh my gosh, yes.
• 1:33:19
  How about your grandparents? Oh my.
• 1:33:21
  Even worse. Then how did we get here?
• 1:33:26
  Someone persisted and prevailed in spite of.
• 1:33:30
  I would assert that no less is required of us.
• 1:33:57
  So I met Caldwell. In 2018, I was invited to
• 1:34:02
  interview a World War 2 veteran and it was a home in Inglewood,
• 1:34:07
  but it was for homeless veterans and he was there in the corner.
• 1:34:11
  And after I introduced myself, I interviewed the World War 2
• 1:34:14
  veteran. He approached me and gave me his
• 1:34:17
  card and told me what he was up to now.
• 1:34:20
  I had already. Been in Landmark.
• 1:34:21
  Education and doing my own this journey of where I'm at today,
• 1:34:26
  meeting him and learning his curriculum and, and spending
• 1:34:30
  time and, and and developing and, and again it's, it's really
• 1:34:39
  not difficult. For those of us who are willing
• 1:34:43
  to. Do the work, you just have to
• 1:34:46
  be. Willing you.
• 1:34:47
  Have to be willing to tell the truth to yourself first.
• 1:34:49
  If nobody else, you've got to be willing to tell the truth to
• 1:34:52
  yourself. It takes a level of confidence.
• 1:34:57
  It takes a level of courage, it takes a level of giving up your
• 1:35:00
  opinion about yourself. And as you watch that clip, his
• 1:35:07
  grandparents the slave. Master owned his.
• 1:35:11
  Grandmother. That was his grandfather.
• 1:35:17
  And for him to be 91 this. Year and still doing the best
• 1:35:22
  that he can to help interrupt veteran suicide youth suicide.
• 1:35:26
  But again, as I said during the show, remove.
• 1:35:30
  The the the. Veteran the label of It's a
• 1:35:34
  human being flaw that we deal with, some of us.
• 1:35:39
  Suffer in silence now there's all kinds of educations.
• 1:35:45
  Out there that you can take, but the one that that we're working
• 1:35:49
  on. That he's trusted me, That when
• 1:35:53
  he. Passes away that I can take this
• 1:35:55
  conversation and move it forward.
• 1:35:58
  Is only because I've done the work.
• 1:36:00
  Myself. The sense of belonging is so.
• 1:36:05
  Important for human beings, as he said, we want to be accepted,
• 1:36:09
  we want to be liked, we want to be loved.
• 1:36:12
  But sometimes that doesn't happen.
• 1:36:17
  Sometimes you got to love yourself. 1st.
• 1:36:22
  And I asked him what is the? Out of your whole curriculum,
• 1:36:25
  what is the most important thing?
• 1:36:27
  We talked about managing change. We talked about suicide
• 1:36:31
  ideation. We talked about just everything
• 1:36:34
  that that we know about life, but we may be forgotten because
• 1:36:37
  we're so caught up in our mindset of being cynical and
• 1:36:41
  this is just the way it is. Mine was why bother after
• 1:36:47
  looking at hope mixed with hopelessness and despair and
• 1:36:51
  disappointment in myself, like, man, you messed up again.
• 1:36:54
  Like how far on how you do that again, like all of that.
• 1:36:57
  They can't make another decision or a choice because I don't want
• 1:37:00
  the outcome. I can't control like all of
• 1:37:02
  that. And when you get to a level of
• 1:37:04
  despair, mine was why bother? Why bother staying alive?
• 1:37:10
  Why bother? Who cares?
• 1:37:14
  But then to ask them what is? The most important thing about
• 1:37:17
  your curriculum, and it's very simple, is speaking without
• 1:37:23
  offending and listening without defending.
• 1:37:28
  Because communication is harmonious.
• 1:37:30
  Communication is not me waiting to respond to what you're saying
• 1:37:35
  because I'm already thinking about the next thing I want to
• 1:37:37
  say. No, it's me.
• 1:37:38
  Listen to you. Listen to your tone, recreating
• 1:37:41
  what you said. And if I don't say it right,
• 1:37:45
  then you. Get to tell me no, this is what
• 1:37:46
  I mean. But sometimes we do speak.
• 1:37:51
  And we offend because sometimes we care so much about one
• 1:37:54
  another that we don't want to see people suffer.
• 1:37:56
  I don't want to see you suffer. So I might say something, but
• 1:37:59
  sometimes you got to ask permission to speak in people's
• 1:38:01
  life. Sometimes, sometimes people just
• 1:38:05
  want to be. Heard and not fixed.
• 1:38:09
  So how do we have? Communication that's harmonious.
• 1:38:13
  I got to be able to remove myself from that conversation
• 1:38:17
  and then listen to you and. Not making me something about.
• 1:38:21
  Me. And sometimes when people speak
• 1:38:27
  to. Us on the other side of that,
• 1:38:29
  they're speaking to that hurt and that pain and you don't have
• 1:38:31
  a right to speak to that. And so we now we get defensive.
• 1:38:34
  So now I'm defending myself from what you said to me, even though
• 1:38:37
  it might be true about me. But you don't get to point that
• 1:38:41
  out. I didn't give you permission to
• 1:38:43
  talk about me. How do you know what I'm dealing
• 1:38:45
  with? And you can't speak to that.
• 1:38:47
  And so now we're defensive. Maybe because I'm living from
• 1:38:53
  I'm. Not good enough.
• 1:38:54
  I'm not worth it. I'm not smart enough.
• 1:38:55
  I'm not this, whatever those I'm not that we carry silently, that
• 1:39:00
  we talk to yourself and your mouth is closed but you talking
• 1:39:03
  to yourself. That voice is not you.
• 1:39:08
  That is not you. So we say.
• 1:39:13
  Everybody says thank you for your service, thank you for your
• 1:39:15
  service, thank you for your service and we appreciate that.
• 1:39:18
  I say thank you for paying your taxes because I'm retired.
• 1:39:22
  So thank you for paying your taxes.
• 1:39:24
  But if you really want to help, if you really are interested and
• 1:39:28
  you can relate to these transitions from elementary to
• 1:39:31
  middle school where you're looking for your identity and
• 1:39:34
  you're no longer really talking to your parents anymore and
• 1:39:36
  you're not talking to your dad anymore or whoever that that
• 1:39:39
  person is that's raising you, that you feel like they don't
• 1:39:42
  understand you or don't hear you.
• 1:39:45
  That transition from elementary to middle school, we all
• 1:39:47
  experienced it. We're looking for that identity.
• 1:39:50
  Mine became basketball I made. Friends through basketball and
• 1:39:54
  my. Identity was as such, and then
• 1:39:56
  it transitioned to being a soldier.
• 1:40:03
  So sometimes not for. All but for some of us, that
• 1:40:06
  emotional strain, the fracture of integrity, the how we talk to
• 1:40:13
  ourselves, the I'm not. It's hard.
• 1:40:18
  For. People to honor their word to
• 1:40:20
  themselves, let alone honor my word to you.
• 1:40:22
  If I can't even honor my word to myself, why would I put the
• 1:40:26
  pressure onto you? I don't.
• 1:40:29
  Understand me. So why would I put the?
• 1:40:31
  Pressure for you to understand me.
• 1:40:35
  But if you relate to me, we. Can have a whole conversation
• 1:40:37
  about stuff. But sometimes as veterans.
• 1:40:42
  Specifically that transition out of the service.
• 1:40:45
  Who am I? Why am I born?
• 1:40:47
  We all have these questions. Why am I?
• 1:40:50
  Born Why am I here? What can I do?
• 1:40:53
  What am I supposed to be doing? Why am I like where do you go
• 1:40:56
  for those answers? Where do you go for those
• 1:41:02
  answers? You can go to.
• 1:41:05
  God, you can go. To what you follow, you got to
• 1:41:08
  go somewhere. And so that's the work.
• 1:41:15
  The basketball team that I have, that's the work.
• 1:41:19
  The elementary school students that we teach this to, that's
• 1:41:22
  the work. The parents, that's the work.
• 1:41:24
  My message at church, that's the work. 1.
• 1:41:32
  Every 65 minutes, a veteran takes their life, one every 65
• 1:41:36
  minutes. And we're just here to interrupt
• 1:41:40
  some of that. Those that are willing to do the
• 1:41:41
  work, you got to be willing. So again, thank.
• 1:41:45
  You for. Tuning in today, I'm very, I
• 1:41:48
  mean, I'm, I'm so blessed by Lisa for introducing me to
• 1:41:53
  Bishop. If you want information about
• 1:41:55
  the ABAAB orchids, aba.com, you can go there and check that out.
• 1:42:00
  I think that's that's all of my that's all of my stuff there.
• 1:42:03
  All right, so we're going to get out of here.
• 1:42:06
  If you want to hit me up at Ferron Dosier on all the
• 1:42:10
  platforms at Ferron Dosier show on Instagram, more than welcome
• 1:42:14
  to be a guest. Thank you for your time today.
• 1:42:16
  I really appreciate you and we're out of here.
• 1:42:19
  This is trench talk, the front Dosier show on MBR platforms.
• 1:42:25
  Thank you. Ladies and gentlemen.
• 1:42:33
  Thank you for tuning in to Military Broadcast Radio.
• 1:42:37
  As we wrap up today's show, we want to remind you that the
• 1:42:41
  podcast of today's episode will be available right after we go
• 1:42:46
  off the air. So if you missed any part of the
• 1:42:49
  show or want to listen. Again.
• 1:42:52
  Be sure to check it out and remember we're here to support
• 1:42:57
  and honor our veterans, your stories, and.
• 1:43:01
  Experiences. Matter and we are committed to
• 1:43:05
  giving you a platform to share them.
• 1:43:08
  That's right, we're here to give our veterans a voice.
• 1:43:13
  So don't forget to catch the podcast and stay connected with
• 1:43:16
  us giving our veterans a voice.