Latest / Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families / The Era of the Tiger Mum Is Over - Enter the Beta Mum

Transcript

The Era of the Tiger Mum Is Over - Enter the Beta Mum · Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

• 0:06
  Speaker 1: A brand new week and a brand new parenting style.
• 0:08
  Speaker 1: Can you believe it? The media, social media influences. Everyone
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: gets so excited about new parenting styles. Today we're going
• 0:14
  Speaker 1: to unpack it. Apparently the era of the tiger mum
• 0:18
  Speaker 1: is over.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: What is a tiger mum. It's a mother who conveys
• 0:23
  Speaker 2: very very high expectations coupled with unconditional love.
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: And we are now in the era of the beta
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: or beta if you're from the United States, the beta
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: or beta mum. What does that mean? The Wall Street
• 0:36
  Speaker 1: Journal is reporting that for decades, high achieving mothers felt
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: pressure to optimize their children for success, and now a
• 0:42
  Speaker 1: whole lot of mums have had enough. They're pulling up stumps.
• 0:45
  Speaker 1: They're taking that bat and ball and going home. Well,
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: actually they're trying to get out of the house entirely.
• 0:50
  Speaker 1: They're not going home. They're going to the day spar
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: having some me time. We're going to unpack what it
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: means to not be an alpha mum but rather a
• 0:57
  Speaker 1: beta mum, and do the social media influencers have it right?
• 1:02
  Speaker 1: Maybe for the first time ever. Stay with us. That's next.
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: It's so good to have you here. This is the
• 1:10
  Speaker 1: happy family's podcast where you get real parenting solutions every
• 1:13
  Speaker 1: single day. It's Australia's most downloaded parenting podcast. We are
• 1:16
  Speaker 1: Justin and Kylie Colson, the parents of six daughters. Kylie,
• 1:20
  Speaker 1: if you were to describe yourself as either an alpha
• 1:24
  Speaker 1: mum or a beta mum, as a Type A or
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: a Type B mum, where would you land on that
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: very brief description.
• 1:32
  Speaker 3: You're hilarious because why do we have to label everything? Honestly,
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: there's a label for everything.
• 1:41
  Speaker 1: I know. I know. So I've spent the last fifteen
• 1:43
  Speaker 1: minutes reading an article to you from the Wall Street Journal.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: At the end of it, we looked at each other
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: and just went, this is ridiculous. But it actually merits
• 1:50
  Speaker 1: a conversation because the influencers who are creating these new
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: parenting styles and creating these labels have literally millions of mums,
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: millions of parents who are following them and saying, oh,
• 2:05
  Speaker 1: you're my new influence. You're the new person that I
• 2:07
  Speaker 1: want to follow, so I want to just step through
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: this article.
• 2:10
  Speaker 3: I find it curious that we have this a desperate
• 2:15
  Speaker 3: need to get outside the box and not do what
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: everybody else does. But in the process of doing that,
• 2:22
  Speaker 3: we find a label that we can identify with that
• 2:26
  Speaker 3: suggests somebody understands me, and inevitably we box ourselves back
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: in again. Why are we doing this?
• 2:32
  Speaker 1: Well, I just find it really extreme. So I want
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: to read just a couple of paragraphs from this and
• 2:36
  Speaker 1: give you on a Rachel Wolf in the Wall Street
• 2:38
  Speaker 1: Journal says, some nights after Sophie Jaffie is already in bed,
• 2:41
  Speaker 1: her phone will ping with a new video from her
• 2:43
  Speaker 1: thirteen year old son that shows him doing a backflip
• 2:46
  Speaker 1: off a concrete wall or standing on someone's shoulders. She
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: usually won't know precisely where in Los Angeles ears, or
• 2:53
  Speaker 1: for that matter, the whereabouts of his fifteen year old
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: brother either, as long as they're home by curfew and
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: have been well behaved that week, the teens are allowed
• 2:59
  Speaker 1: to set their own schedules. And it goes on to
• 3:01
  Speaker 1: talk about how like this is, this is that standard idea,
• 3:06
  Speaker 1: it's just a new name for free range parenting. But
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: parents in this are basically saying, we've been overscheduling our kids.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: The expectations have been really high. Everyone's been going on
• 3:16
  Speaker 1: and on about how they've got to get their kids
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: to do as well at school as they can and
• 3:19
  Speaker 1: to fulfill their potential and set them up for success
• 3:21
  Speaker 1: because cost of living and house prices, all that sort
• 3:24
  Speaker 1: of stuff. And this new group of parents are saying, no, no, no,
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: we're better parents rather than type A, and we're just
• 3:30
  Speaker 1: taking the pressure off. I mean I read that and
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: I thought, no, this is actually neglectful. Like if your kids,
• 3:35
  Speaker 1: if you don't know where they are and they're thirteen
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: and fifteen, they're riding up down the street on e
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: bikes and doing backflips and you're in bed like it's
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: nine o'clock at night. Sorry, but that's not how this
• 3:46
  Speaker 1: is supposed to work.
• 3:47
  Speaker 3: I actually have a slightly different kind of, I guess
• 3:50
  Speaker 3: view on all of this. I look at how many
• 3:55
  Speaker 3: of our generation are becoming estranged from their parents because
• 4:00
  Speaker 3: they've held their parents to this standard of parenting. In
• 4:05
  Speaker 3: today's time, with all that we understand and know about
• 4:10
  Speaker 3: children's needs their development that was not necessarily well known
• 4:15
  Speaker 3: right in our parents' time.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: You're saying that today's adults are saying to their parents,
• 4:20
  Speaker 1: you did allows each.
• 4:21
  Speaker 3: You did a bad job, right, But in the process
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: of doing that, they've severed relationships with their parents, they're
• 4:27
  Speaker 3: now holding themselves as a parent. Me you, we're holding
• 4:31
  Speaker 3: ourselves at a standard that our parents could never have
• 4:34
  Speaker 3: lived by and have completely over complicated.
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: Their lives, their lives and their children's lives because and
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: also support of their parents, because they've estranged themselves from them,
• 4:48
  Speaker 1: because there's so much judgment and all that sort of things.
• 4:50
  Speaker 3: Well, what do our children need to thrive?
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: Because I'm a parenting expert, I actually do have the
• 4:54
  Speaker 1: answer to that. Before I give you that answer, though,
• 4:56
  Speaker 1: can I just say this, and I said this on
• 4:58
  Speaker 1: the podcast a lot, but it bears repeating. Can we
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: just be sensible and stop listening to social media influences
• 5:05
  Speaker 1: for our parenting advice? Do they have some wisdom? Probably,
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: but it's always so extreme. Got to be type A,
• 5:11
  Speaker 1: gotta be alpha, got to be like Amy Chow and
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: her Battle hym of the Tiger Mother, right, and everyone's
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: reading that book and going, oh, thank god, is I'm
• 5:18
  Speaker 1: not like that? But everyone's sort of going, But I
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: do need to get my kids learning the violin or
• 5:21
  Speaker 1: the piano or doing their swimming lessons or whatever, because
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: I want them to achieve. And the backlash the pendulum
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: now in this article in the Wall Street Journal has
• 5:30
  Speaker 1: swung entirely to the other end, where people are saying, no,
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: we're not playing that game anymore. We're just gonna chill.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: We're going to relax, We're going to have some me time.
• 5:38
  Speaker 1: We're going to let the kids figure it out for
• 5:40
  Speaker 1: themselves and they'll be okay. We want them to follow
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: their bliss. We want them to live their best lives,
• 5:44
  Speaker 1: whatever that best life is, even if it means that
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: they don't do that well at school, because how important
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: is school really?
• 5:49
  Speaker 3: So I just want to kind of strip this back
• 5:50
  Speaker 3: for a bit. You and I came from completely different backgrounds, Yeah,
• 5:53
  Speaker 3: completely different.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: You had everything, so My parents were entrepreneurial. They sent
• 5:58
  Speaker 1: me to a private school. They have been all the
• 6:00
  Speaker 1: extracurricular activities. They bought me whatever I needed and frankly wanted,
• 6:04
  Speaker 1: went on lots of holidays, and they really wanted me
• 6:06
  Speaker 1: to fulfill my potential. And of course I squandered it.
• 6:08
  Speaker 1: I failed high school and didn't appreciate all of the
• 6:11
  Speaker 1: good things that they did. I quit swimming lessons, I
• 6:13
  Speaker 1: quit piano, I quit whatever else they put me into.
• 6:15
  Speaker 1: I just wanted to do my own thing, go surfing
• 6:17
  Speaker 1: and play music and work on the radio.
• 6:19
  Speaker 3: So for all intents and purposes, you lived a really
• 6:22
  Speaker 3: privileged life.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: No doubt, and had no idea. I had no idea
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: how privileged until I was too old and living on
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: my own and realized that, oh my goodness, I can't
• 6:31
  Speaker 1: get near those things back. But it was good, It
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: could have been really good, but I squandered it.
• 6:36
  Speaker 3: I came from what I guess you would consider the
• 6:38
  Speaker 3: Aussie battler. Oh yeah, yeah, Like my parents didn't have
• 6:42
  Speaker 3: a lot of money. I didn't do any extracurricular activities.
• 6:47
  Speaker 1: I public school all the way through.
• 6:49
  Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I didn't have those kinds of opportunities. But
• 6:53
  Speaker 3: does that mean that my life that I haven't had
• 6:56
  Speaker 3: a successful life, that I haven't been able to contribute
• 6:58
  Speaker 3: to society because I missed out on all of those
• 7:01
  Speaker 3: all of those privileges.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: Well, this is what I say when I do my
• 7:03
  Speaker 1: parenting workshops on resilience. I'm like, why are we bashing
• 7:06
  Speaker 1: our kids so hard to achieve their potential?
• 7:08
  Speaker 3: Like I didn't go to university if you don't have
• 7:11
  Speaker 3: an extra qualification.
• 7:12
  Speaker 1: Do you know that two thirds of Australian adults didn't
• 7:14
  Speaker 1: go to university, and yet they're still making great contributions,
• 7:17
  Speaker 1: enormous contributions to the world as society, to their families,
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: to their organizations they work for, whatever it might be,
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: their social groups, their churches, the sports club. Like. The
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: expectations are just bizarre. They're all topsy turvy.
• 7:30
  Speaker 3: And I just I think that expectation is the right word.
• 7:34
  Speaker 3: We have this unrealistic expectation and add so much pressure
• 7:38
  Speaker 3: to not only our lives financially as we strive to
• 7:41
  Speaker 3: give these kids a privileged life, but we also forget
• 7:47
  Speaker 3: the fundamentals of what actually makes for a happy child.
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: And our goal isn't happy, right, Our goal isn't happy,
• 7:56
  Speaker 3: But our goal is creating a safe environment where our
• 8:00
  Speaker 3: children can flourish and grow. Yeah.
• 8:03
  Speaker 1: Yeah, So my favorite word, and you've heard me saying
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: this a lot lately, is enlargement. Don't choose happiness, choose enlargement.
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: What can you do where there's going to be some growth,
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: some developments, some insights, some learning, some build up. Is
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: that type A I don't think so. I think that's
• 8:15
  Speaker 1: just let's get our priorities right. And I don't know. Again,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: I'm going to go back to that point that I made.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: These influences are all about pushing for extremes because that's
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: what the algorithm responds to. That's what gets people fired up,
• 8:28
  Speaker 1: and that's what gets articles written about you in the
• 8:29
  Speaker 1: Wall Street Journal. So you ask the question before missus
• 8:32
  Speaker 1: Happy Families, what do kids actually need? After the break,
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: I'm going to give you the three things that kids need,
• 8:38
  Speaker 1: and none of them are extreme. You won't find any
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: of them really on social media.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: In anything cost you anything, none.
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: Can cost you anything. You can you can send your
• 8:46
  Speaker 1: kids to public school and they can still have these
• 8:48
  Speaker 1: things and they'll actually end up being more resilient and
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: better off than anything that you'll find on a social
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: media platform. Stay with this, We're back. This is the
• 9:05
  Speaker 1: Happy Family's podcast where you get real parenting solutions every
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: single day. We can do this really fast, Kylie. The
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: three things that I think children need so that they
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: can thrive in their lives. They all start with L.
• 9:15
  Speaker 1: They're really easy to memorize. I have shared them on
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: the pod before, but it's been a long long time.
• 9:20
  Speaker 1: They need love, they need limits, they need laughter, full stop.
• 9:23
  Speaker 1: End of story.
• 9:24
  Speaker 3: Well, my back pocket's like in these a lot that's unhappen.
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: It's a lot cheaper than all the other.
• 9:31
  Speaker 3: No tennis lessons, no shoes to find, no rackets.
• 9:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Love it's about connection. When the kids walk in
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: the door, what do they see on your face? Do
• 9:40
  Speaker 1: they see delight and joy or do they see a wrinkled,
• 9:43
  Speaker 1: furrowed brow and an accusing stare because they haven't cleaned
• 9:47
  Speaker 1: their room or they didn't wear their school cap home
• 9:50
  Speaker 1: or whatever it might be? Like, love is about connection,
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: feeling seen, herd valued and accepted. Kids feel love t
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: im just like dollars of the currency of our economy.
• 10:00
  Speaker 1: Connection is the currency of our relationships. This is the
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: stuff that I've been shouting from the rooftops for the
• 10:05
  Speaker 1: last fifteen to twenty years.
• 10:06
  Speaker 3: So I'm a really visual person. And when you say love,
• 10:13
  Speaker 3: the ultimate picture for me, the ultimate vision is having
• 10:16
  Speaker 3: all of my children around the dinner table on Sunday night, laughing, laughing,
• 10:21
  Speaker 3: sharing stories, confessing to all of their misdemeanors that we
• 10:24
  Speaker 3: didn't know anything about. That is the epitome of love
• 10:28
  Speaker 3: because you can only do that. Number one if you've
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: built the environment where that's okay firstly, and number two
• 10:35
  Speaker 3: where kids feel safe enough that they can share right,
• 10:38
  Speaker 3: So that doesn't cost you anything.
• 10:42
  Speaker 1: It costs you time. And Mark Twain said this. Mark
• 10:44
  Speaker 1: Twain said that we are always too busy for our children.
• 10:47
  Speaker 1: We never give them the time or interest they deserve.
• 10:49
  Speaker 1: We lavish gifts upon them at the most precious gift,
• 10:51
  Speaker 1: our personal association, which means so much to them, we
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: give grudgingly. And I've got another quote here on my
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: desk that I look at every single day. It's from
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: Simone who said attention is the rarest and purest form
• 11:05
  Speaker 1: of generosity. How beautiful is that? So l ov love
• 11:09
  Speaker 1: that's the first thing that kids need. They don't need
• 11:11
  Speaker 1: an alpha parent or a beater parent. And by the way,
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: you can be an alpha parent and a beat parent
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: and show love. But it's not about you saying of
• 11:19
  Speaker 1: course I love my child. It's about your child saying
• 11:22
  Speaker 1: of course I feel loved by my parents. And that's
• 11:25
  Speaker 1: the critical thing. Their perception is the reality, not yours.
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: Second one, limits love does not mean that kids get
• 11:33
  Speaker 1: a free ride. It doesn't mean that kids don't have
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: boundaries and systems and expectations and structure in their lives.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Kids need to have limits, They need to have rules.
• 11:42
  Speaker 1: They need to be expectations, which means that you're thirteen
• 11:46
  Speaker 1: year old probably should not be out roaming the streets
• 11:48
  Speaker 1: on their e bike or e scooter when you're at
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: home in bed and it's nine o'clock at night, which
• 11:52
  Speaker 1: came out of that first paragraph of that Wall Street
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: Journal article and I read and I just thought, no,
• 11:56
  Speaker 1: that's that's just not how it's supposed to be. Limits
• 11:59
  Speaker 1: mean now ideally so structure, structure, and limits are associated
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: with health and happiness and doing well. But that structure
• 12:10
  Speaker 1: is most likely to have that association with those positive
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: outcomes health and happiness and so on when it's been
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: developed in what I talk about as an autonomy supportive way.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: In other words, when you're having conversations with the kids
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: and saying, what are the limits, what are the structures?
• 12:24
  Speaker 1: How are we going to build this in a way
• 12:25
  Speaker 1: that we can both feel good about it and using
• 12:28
  Speaker 1: my wisdom as an adult, we can know that we're
• 12:30
  Speaker 1: keeping you safe. A case in point, just the other
• 12:33
  Speaker 1: day we were having some challenges one of the kids,
• 12:35
  Speaker 1: so I sat down with her and I said, what
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: is it that you actually want in our How do
• 12:38
  Speaker 1: you want our family to.
• 12:39
  Speaker 3: Feel or how do you want to feel being in
• 12:41
  Speaker 3: our own.
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: That's right, and we were fortunate enough that it took
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: us some time. But once she had calmed herself down
• 12:47
  Speaker 1: a little bit, she was like, I don't want to
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: feel like I'm feeling right now. And so it was like, well,
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: how do we create a structure in our family? How
• 12:53
  Speaker 1: do we create a structure within our relationships that works
• 12:56
  Speaker 1: for everyone so that we're not all feeling like this.
• 13:00
  Speaker 1: We had a really productive conversation because she had a
• 13:02
  Speaker 1: voice in that conversation, she started to work on some
• 13:04
  Speaker 1: solutions with us. It's pretty hard going, but she's been
• 13:07
  Speaker 1: a different child since we had that conversation. So you've
• 13:09
  Speaker 1: got love that underpins the development of the limits. Whole
• 13:13
  Speaker 1: lot of autonomy support in there, and it makes a difference.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: And the third L Kyle, it's my favorite one and
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: we talk about it on the podcast all the time.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: It's laughter, Like if you want to have a happy family,
• 13:22
  Speaker 1: you need to laugh.
• 13:24
  Speaker 2: If you're not laughing, it's not going to be very
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: fun if everyone if everyone is a really serious all
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: the time, if we're running from pillar to post, or
• 13:31
  Speaker 2: if we're too chill and the kids are not actually engaging.
• 13:35
  Speaker 1: We're missing out on opportunities to connect and to laugh.
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: Love limits laughter. We don't need extreme parenting styles. We
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: don't need advice from social media. We don't need another label.
• 13:48
  Speaker 1: We just need to raise our kids and stop thinking
• 13:50
  Speaker 1: about it so hard.
• 13:52
  Speaker 3: I think about laughter, and what I love about laughter
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: is for our kids. I think that it helps them
• 13:59
  Speaker 3: to see our humanity. Where the adults in the room,
• 14:03
  Speaker 3: we're the ones who take life seriously, we've got to
• 14:05
  Speaker 3: pay the bills, you know, we're kind of doing the
• 14:07
  Speaker 3: big people things. But when we can laugh with them,
• 14:11
  Speaker 3: laugh at ourselves, laugh together, it reminds them, number one,
• 14:16
  Speaker 3: that we're human. But it brings us down to their level.
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: And that's what's so powerful to me about laughter.
• 14:22
  Speaker 1: Well, I would just old tweak that. I know I'm
• 14:23
  Speaker 1: being a little bit banandic here, but I wouldn't say
• 14:25
  Speaker 1: it brings us down to their level as much as
• 14:26
  Speaker 1: I would say elevates them. Well, it brings us all
• 14:29
  Speaker 1: to the same level. Yeah, okay, yeah, because otherwise it's like,
• 14:33
  Speaker 1: are we really above them?
• 14:34
  Speaker 3: I don't know.
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: Anyway. You can be an alpha parent, you can be
• 14:37
  Speaker 1: a better parent, you can be a helicopter parent. You
• 14:39
  Speaker 1: can be a tiger parent. You can do whatever you want.
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: You can just be a parent doing the best that
• 14:44
  Speaker 3: you are doing.
• 14:45
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and be okay with that. I heard this thing.
• 14:48
  Speaker 1: There's a guy who does a podcast, is quite well known,
• 14:51
  Speaker 1: making a really big name for himself, particularly around the
• 14:53
  Speaker 1: whole boys and manhood sort of stuff. His name Scott Galloway,
• 14:56
  Speaker 1: and he said this in a thing that somebody sent
• 14:59
  Speaker 1: me because I don't have so media, but somebody sent
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: this to me. He said this. He said in terms
• 15:04
  Speaker 1: of are you doing a good job as a parent.
• 15:06
  Speaker 1: If you're doing a better job as a parent than
• 15:09
  Speaker 1: your parents did with you, then you've understood the instructions,
• 15:11
  Speaker 1: You've done it well. And if you're judging your parents
• 15:13
  Speaker 1: for not being good, just pause for a moment and
• 15:15
  Speaker 1: ask yourself, are they doing a better job than their
• 15:17
  Speaker 1: parents did with them? Because if they've done a better
• 15:20
  Speaker 1: job than their parents did with them, they understood the
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: instructions and they got it right. We need to stop
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: judging them and just appreciate that they had a decent crack.
• 15:29
  Speaker 3: For me, the clarity that I get from that is,
• 15:32
  Speaker 3: how can I sit in my seat knowing all of
• 15:35
  Speaker 3: my imperfections as a parent and hold my parents to
• 15:39
  Speaker 3: a standard that I myself am not able to live.
• 15:44
  Speaker 3: It's about grace. If we can just give each other grace.
• 15:47
  Speaker 1: Yeap, love it. Thanks so much for listening. Hey, this
• 15:50
  Speaker 1: week really really exciting week. On the podcast tomorrow we're
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: answering a question from Marlene from Melbourne who wants to
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: know you've got a big family, how do you keep
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: holidays affordable? We're going to talk about that in cost
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: of living crunch when went to holidays aren't too far away?
• 16:03
  Speaker 1: Plus a world record holder in free diving that is
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: taking one very big deep breath and going under the
• 16:09
  Speaker 1: water as deeply as you can under the ice, Aunt Williams.
• 16:14
  Speaker 1: He's got a brand new book out about resilience and
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: mental toughness. It's called Let It Be Tough. And I'm
• 16:19
  Speaker 1: going to pick his brains on Wednesday about how we
• 16:22
  Speaker 1: can teach our kids those skills, those resilience skills that
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: he had to adopt to set world records in free
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: diving under the ice. It's going to be an absolute cracker.
• 16:32
  Speaker 1: Please join us again tomorrow, the day after and every
• 16:35
  Speaker 1: day after that for the Happy Families podcast, which is
• 16:37
  Speaker 1: produced by Justin Rouland from Bridge Media. Mimhammonds provides our
• 16:41
  Speaker 1: additional admin support, and if you'd like more info and
• 16:44
  Speaker 1: resources to make your family happier, visit us at happy
• 16:46
  Speaker 1: families dot com dot a you