Latest / Relish: a Christian podcast / Speaking Truth in Love: Friends, Faith, and Tough Conversations

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Speaking Truth in Love: Friends, Faith, and Tough Conversations · Relish: a Christian podcast

• 0:02
  Relish pleasing or zestful flavor a quantity
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  just sufficient to flavor to be pleased or
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  gratified by enjoy we are hoping that what
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  we bring to your table today might add some spice to your life welcome back
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  to another episode of relish this is don patterson it is and yep i would be
• 0:22
  roan miller then yeah as i get older you might have to remind me oh yeah you're don Patterson.
• 0:28
  Okay. Filming this in the nursing home or something.
• 0:36
  Oh my.
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  I forget the name, but remembers all the Bible past. Yeah, I hope so.
• 0:44
  You know what? That'd be really cool. I don't mind forgetting all the things
• 0:48
  of the past, but keep the Bible in my head.
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  Keep the Bible in my head. Book, chapter, and verse.
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  Book, chapter, and verse. I hope so. I still think we should maybe get a segment
• 0:59
  together where I'll read a scripture or read a scripture or something.
• 1:03
  You get a point for chapter, a point for a book, and a point for verse.
• 1:09
  That's the game Charlene and I play of a morning. Did you know that?
• 1:12
  Yeah, during our devotions.
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  So we use daily bread as our Bible, our first devotion in the morning at the breakfast table.
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  And so our thing is Charlene reads that passage.
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  She'll read the devotion and then read the Bible passage. and then I do book, chapter, and verse.
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  And of course, Bible devotions are going to be sort of limited in what they're doing.
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  And I don't know whether they're lectionary-based or whatever,
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  but I do pretty good on that. I can imagine.
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  So then I read the other passages when we get to our other part of our devotions.
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  And we read a chapter a day, Monday, Wednesday, Friday. It is...
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  New Testament, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday is Old Testament and Sunday is both.
• 1:59
  Nice. So it gives us a good context. I have your question. All right. Okay.
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  If someone asked you, who is Jesus? What would you say?
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  I'd say short and sweet. I just say my Lord and savior.
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  That's good. But, um, I'd say he's the like son of God who is.
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  Sent upon earth because God loved us so much and then died on the cross to sacrifice
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  himself to save us from all of our earthly and horrible sins that we.
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  Yeah, I think he did pretty good. What do you think? You can give him a thumbs up.
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  I see them all. I see all those things out. There you go.
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  Good job. Good job. You can make a whole sermon out of that. I could.
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  Yeah. I won't even bother asking you. We'll just get into the question.
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  Yeah. We better go into the other. Otherwise, we'll never get there. Yeah.
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  That's part of the way that goes, Don. Talks and talks and talks. Right. Talks.
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  You'll love this. So, at our 50th school class reunion, high school class reunion. Yeah.
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  Everybody shared about what they were doing, who they were married to and how
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  many kids they had and how many grandkids they had. And one,
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  even how many great grandkids they had.
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  And, uh, so we shared all the way around and I decided I was towards the end
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  and they knew I was the only preacher in the room.
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  And so they all knew, you know, you get a preacher started, he could go all evening.
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  Yeah. And so I set a stopwatch when I
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  started because the person right ahead of me did take quite a bit of time and
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  so i set a stopwatch and i got all that done in two minutes and answered and
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  answered a question yes that was chris so we we did the cliff notes of don patterson yeah,
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  it's a good thing you weren't at the end because it might if you were the very
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  last one they might just got up and laughed all together before i ever got to
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  say anything yeah that's true that's true,
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  yeah oh my all right this should be a fun question I hope so um.
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  I'll ask the question and then kind of like another question,
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  but are we supposed to? And then another question. Yeah. Is that allowed? Kind of.
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  I think I make up the rules here, so I'm going to allow it.
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  Are we supposed to point out flaws in our brothers in Christ?
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  So kind of like if your close friend or loved one, they were wearing something
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  that they thought was just the best thing they've ever worn,
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  the best looking thing they've ever one. And you had a friend do that.
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  I haven't, I haven't, but I've, yeah.
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  And then they, they ask you what you think of it. And that's the ugliest thing
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  you've ever seen. Right.
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  I've had that happen. Yeah. So are you, are you going to, do you tell them that
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  it's ugly? Is that, is it the same thing or is it not the same thing?
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  Well, it's somewhat the same thing. What we know from Ecclesiastes is that we sharpen one another.
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  When we're in fellowship with each other and we have a certain intimacy in that
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  fellowship, we care for each other, we're going to speak the truth in love, if you will.
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  And that's Ephesians chapter 4, I think it's 15.
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  We're going to want to speak the truth in love. We want to do it in a way to
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  help each other because if I want you to watch me.
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  And I am watching you. And I want you to be the best Christian you can possibly
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  be and the best brother in Christ.
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  And I hope the reciprocals also.
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  So if we maintain those kind of relationships and those desires for each other,
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  we're always going to want the best.
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  We're always going to want the best for each other.
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  And so when that guy comes out in that mauve tuxedo to the banquet,
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  you're going to say, really, dude?
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  And you might do it before he ever gets there. So he can pull on sweatpants or something.
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  But you'll do it in such a way that, hey, I really care.
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  If I didn't care, I wouldn't say it. I wouldn't risk our friendship.
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  But I want to say that. But the
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  second piece of it then comes like in 2 Corinthians, I think it's chapter.
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  I should have brought my new Bible because I can flip the pages faster.
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  See, these are all very loose anymore.
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  Let's see, is it five or is it two or...
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  Here, seven.
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  So if you, Paul is talking about the sorrow that he created in the Corinthians
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  by the chastisement he gave them in 1 Corinthians 5, because he was miffed.
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  They didn't, they had a brother that was in sin. They weren't taking care of the sin.
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  And I see for a little while I hurt you, but only for a little while.
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  Yet now I'm happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance.
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  For you became sorrowful as God intended, and so were not harmed in any way by us.
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  Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret.
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  Can you imagine what would happen if your friend was doing something and you
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  didn't point it out, and then you regretted it later?
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  And they would regret it later, and they'd say, how's come you didn't tell me?
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  How's come you didn't tell me that Mov isn't in this year?
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  But worldly sorrow brings death. See that this godly sorrow has produced in
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  you what earnestness, what eagerness, what clear to clear yourselves,
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  what indignation, what alarm, what longing, and what concern,
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  what readiness to see justice done.
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  At every point, you've proved yourselves to be innocent in this matter.
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  But if it hadn't been brought up, would the challenge have been there to even talk about it?
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  And part of what comes around in relationships, I guess I would say in my generation,
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  well, that's what he wants to do. Let him do it.
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  Yeah. And so I wonder sometimes if I let some of my friends down because I didn't
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  speak into it and didn't bring it up. And I'm sorry, guys, if I did.
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  Yeah. I really wasn't aware. But as I look into Scripture and I see what we're
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  supposed to be as heart-focused community, wanting the best for each other,
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  being each other's cheerleaders,
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  we're going to be working at sharpening our independent skills and calling out
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  the skills of others the best we can for each other. It's not a competition.
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  We're all in this together.
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  We're all doing the spiritual warfare together we're in this world together,
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  God's called us to be a body and so how can we do it better together than we could separately.
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  Did I get to that question? The second part? Burk checked me.
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  You said, well, the second part, like in the bad-looking clothes? Yeah.
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  I think I focused on the bad-looking clothes. Yeah. But, yeah. You got it. Yeah.
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  Oh, man, my memory. My mind goes
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  back to memories of high school and the audacious things we used to wear.
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  That was the days of the bell bottoms.
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  Yeah. And the bigger the bell, the less it looked like your bottom.
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  And so you had bigger bells if you had big bottoms. I think that's the way it
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  worked out. Well, there's still people that wear those now.
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  Oh, my goodness. I didn't know that. They might be coming back. I don't know.
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  Lord, help us. They're not like, I mean, I don't know how big they were back
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  in your day at the bottom. Big bottom.
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  I remember having uh it was
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  a best groom boys contest 4-h in my
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  first years of high school and my bell bottoms were big i mean they're foot
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  foot around yeah and they're white white pants yes uh-huh and get a hold of
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  this checkered tie and a blue sport coat and i can't remember what the shirt was.
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  I think the shirt was white. No, something.
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  Oh, it was dark blue. No, white, white shirt, dark blue, white bell bottoms. Yeah.
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  I looked like the flag. Yeah, you did. Sorry.
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  But I got a prize. Oh, yeah? I mean, there was only three of us, so how could I get wrong?
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  You know, got a grand prize, blue and red ribbons. I got a ribbon.
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  Yeah. I won't say which one.
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  Oh, my. Those were the days. Lovely. I might have to see that picture of something. I think maybe not.
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  Dear. Maybe at my funeral.
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  I haven't had to fight funeral.
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  Then I don't have to put up with that.
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  Okay. So that's what he was like in his childhood. Oh, mercy.
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  You're just lucky you didn't know me back then.
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  I've come a long way by faith. Yeah. Leaning on the Lord.
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  And a few other things. Leaning on my wife and family. Yeah.
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  Yeah. Okay. Talking about friendships. Yeah. Friendships.
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  So. We're living in a heavily Mennonite and Amish community Really?
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  Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Second biggest Amish Mennonite settlement west of the
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  Mississippi. We used to be the first.
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  Who outbeat us. I think Windsor, Missouri, that area. Missouri,
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  that area of Missouri beat us out.
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  So what are the, like, can you just highlight the beliefs or traditions,
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  like we mentioned before, that would separate or that separate the Mennonites and the Amish?
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  Because there's a lot of overlap, but also. It's a lot of overlap.
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  We both would, okay, the Schleidheim Confession would be the first confession
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  that came out of the Anabaptist movement. It had seven points.
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  And those seven points have carried over into all of our later confessions of faith.
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  The Amish still go back to the Schleidheim Confession.
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  Okay. They use that, including the ban, as part of their operating system.
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  They still use the ban. in their circles.
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  That would be one of the places that we separate on because we don't actively use the ban or, or, uh,
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  Well, I can't think of the name right now. The ban is in your first name.
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  You're referring to like.
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  Where we kick somebody out of the church. We used to call it church.
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  Excommunication. There we go. It took a little while. It's back there in the
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  back corner. And I found it. We don't do excommunication actively.
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  I have done it in the last 40 years of ministry. It was not fun. No.
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  Would not. But I can't say I wouldn't do it again.
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  Definitely would not. Well, even in that situation, it was not the first line,
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  not the first thing we did to try to resolve the situation.
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  In the Amish church, it's not either. It's not the first thing they do.
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  The bishop usually comes over, the church minister comes over,
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  and there's a discussion about a clarification of what's going on.
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  And then usually, you know, take care of your rubber tires on your tractor,
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  put the steel ones back on kind of thing.
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  And they negotiate with it. The idea being that they want to be in full communion
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  as a unit, all in agreement by the time they take communion.
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  I see. And so, yeah.
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  So they have that. We don't have that. There's nothing really other than our
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  confession of faith that binds us, I mean, as far as actions and activities,
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  in the same way the Amish interpret that.
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  We don't ask for everybody to buy black cars or blue cars or things like that.
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  And there are other Anabaptist groups that would.
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  We're not really concerned as much about the outward as we are the inward. Right.
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  And I hope we keep that focus and do more to help each other with the inward
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  walk with God. That's what I'd hope.
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  The stances otherwise are very similar.
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  It's interesting that the Amish are beginning to secretly buy English Bibles
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  because they understand them better than they understand the high German.
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  And so the Amish dialect, what they talk with each other is platdeutsch, which is a low German.
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  And if you have ever heard German, you can't hardly, if you understand low German,
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  it's hard to understand high German.
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  If you understand high German, it's a little hard to understand low German.
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  If I'm in a funeral, I can tell the scriptures because they are close enough to Greek roots.
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  Bless you. Wow, Alex, you better take that one out. They're close enough to English.
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  They're close enough, excuse me, to Greek roots that I could interpret those scriptures.
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  But when they're talking platte Deutsch, I just cannot. There's nothing I get.
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  There's not a thing I get out of that.
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  So in their homes, and I think this is a testimony to them, they want to understand the word. Right.
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  And they can do that better in the English language now than they could even
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  in their Platte Deutsch.
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  Of course, there isn't a Platte Deutsch Bible, I don't believe.
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  I mean, there's just a… Yeah.
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  There is a dictionary. So the bishop would be, he's giving them all their scriptures
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  then? The bishop is? And they're German Bibles.
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  It's a good Bible they use. I mean, they use the Martin Luther translation of
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  the Bible into German, which is a really good translation if you understand German. Yeah.
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  If you don't understand German, high German, then it's a little hard to grab a hold of.
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  So these Amish, in pursuit of their faith, are grabbing a hold of English Bibles.
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  And I think that's cool. Yeah.
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  Well, that's what started it all in the first place was the... Precisely.
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  ...was the people getting, being able to read it in their own language.
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  That's the first tenet of the seven in the Schreidheim Confession,
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  that we believe the Word of God through Jesus Christ, and it is truth.
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  Yeah. So, a high value of Scripture in both groups. Yeah.
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  Did I lose sight of the question? No. Okay. No, it was good.
• 18:02
  Sometimes we have to get... You're doubting yourself too much. Broom. Yeah.
• 18:06
  Don went off in sermon mode. He didn't get back. Okay.
• 18:11
  Well, I'm sorry. Well, that might be all we have for you today.
• 18:16
  Might be all we can handle. Yeah.
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  Hope that you enjoyed it. Share it. Like it. Comment.
• 18:26
  Sending questions, anything like that. Make it a forum. Yeah. Yeah.
• 18:31
  You know, I was thinking of something the other day. So if there's a spot that
• 18:35
  you would like dialogue and question, and Rowan, I'd never ask you if you'd be willing.
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  If you have questions at your church and you want somebody to speak on them,
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  ask us, we'd come, wouldn't you? Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
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  And Rowan does a good job. He moderates and keeps me on task.
• 18:55
  And I enjoy that. I appreciate that.
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  And sometimes he restates questions so that I can understand them better.
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  And that's good, too. So his role is basically giving me the freedom to just
• 19:09
  think about the question so that I can answer it well from Scripture.
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  He takes care of everything else. And then on top of that, we've got Alex.
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  Hi, Alex. And Alex takes care of the video.
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  And so I sat here. I don't have much to do.
• 19:24
  In between episodes, you're saying?
• 19:29
  These episodes come about because you two guys are invested in them, and I appreciate that.
• 19:34
  Yeah. And so we do this in your area if you want to do a Sunday evening or something
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  like that, or a time where we could have Q&A.
• 19:43
  Yeah. And fellowship with you.
• 19:46
  Yeah. Cookies are good, too. Yeah. Ice cream. Ice cream. You like ice cream.
• 19:51
  Ice cream looks good, yeah. Yeah. We don't ask much.
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  Cookies and ice cream. Yeah. Oh my. All right. We opened a can of worms,
• 20:01
  I'm afraid. Yeah. But yeah. Thank you as always, Don.
• 20:04
  Thank you guys for hearing in and we will see you guys next time.
• 20:07
  Thank you, buddy. Lord willing.
• 20:11
  Thank you for joining us for this podcast. Feel free to become part of this
• 20:14
  ministry by sharing it with others.
• 20:16
  Our goal is to help each other grow deeper in our understanding of who God is
• 20:20
  and is calling to us in our daily lives.
• 20:22
  Thank you again for joining us and may God bless your day.