Latest / Something Extra / A Journey of Surrender w/ Brandon Bettis

Transcript

A Journey of Surrender w/ Brandon Bettis · Something Extra

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Brandon Bettis: So, like, on paper, like, I like to describe my my testimony is,
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like, I had, like, a perfect life.
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I mean, the snapshot of my life was was amazing.
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I was in I was I called myself incredibly blessed.
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So I had two careers that I loved.
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When I when I left the military, I was fortunate enough to to kinda
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land in the financial services world.
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And so I had two careers that I loved,
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that I was extremely blessed and fortunate to have.
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I had a a beautiful, loving wife, that was supportive.
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She was amazing.
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She supported my entire career.
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I had two happy, healthy daughters, just wonderful
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financial independence, and and I was suicidal.
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Lisa Nichols: It takes something a little more to lead with impact.
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I'm Lisa Nichols, author of Something Extra, and this podcast
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was inspired by our daughter, Allie, whose additional chromosome has shaped
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how I see people in leadership.
1:01
Each episode features conversations with inspiring leaders from around the
1:05
world about what truly defines how they lead and serve others.
1:10
If you enjoyed today's conversation, please consider leaving a five star
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review.
1:15
It helps more people discover the show.
1:18
And if you'd like to go deeper, my book, Something Extra, is available on
1:22
on Amazon and through other major book retailers.
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I'm grateful to have Brandon Bettis on the show today.
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Brandon is the director of client enrichment at Epic Holistic Partners.
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Well, Brandon, welcome to the Something Extra podcast.
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It is so good to see you again.
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Brandon Bettis: Yes, ma'am.
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I'm excited to be here.
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Thanks for having me.
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Lisa Nichols: I am excited.
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I'm excited about our conversation today.
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And you and I are recent friends.
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Brandon Bettis: Yep.
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Lisa Nichols: Right?
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We we met just a couple of months ago at the Realign conference
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here in, Saint Louis.
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And I was so impressed, Brandon, because you you saw it somewhere,
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and you just you came.
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You live in Phoenix, and, you just hopped on a plane and came.
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So Yeah.
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Brandon Bettis: It was it was a it was a it was one of those things
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I met I met Matt virtually,
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Matt Granados.
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He was, speaking at a c suite for Christ virtual
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event.
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And, man, there's just something different that he said and
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talking about the gap between optimal performance and,
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just that little that little hump to get over sometimes, like, in our professional
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lives.
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And, you know, know, after a couple of conversations with him, I was just
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interested in I started kinda doing the homework that he gave us, a little
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bit of content that he had.
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And after a conversation with him so last
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year,
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I kinda had a theme for the year of being content.
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And I think I got too content in some areas where
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I wasn't living my full potential, and I was like, you know, there's something
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more that I could be doing.
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And then this year, my theme has been to get uncomfortable to for discomfort,
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because sometimes that's where we see a lot of growth and we get out
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through our comfort zone.
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And so this was part of that was part of the reason why.
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I was like, you know, let me let me pay the fee to go
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to this conference.
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I'm not even sure what we're gonna talk about.
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I have no idea.
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And I literally went into it with I'm like, okay.
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Worst case scenario, it's a trip to Saint Louis, and it's
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a waste of time and it's a waste of money.
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That's literally the worst case scenario, and then it's a learning experience.
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But, man, it was such a good conference.
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To so many good people in the room.
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Such a good,
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use of two days, and it was really pivotal.
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So now it's now I'm gonna still see okay.
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What are you gonna do to apply this?
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What are you gonna do to apply the things you learn and continue to
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get uncomfortable?
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So, yeah, that's how we met.
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Met as strangers, left as friends, and now here we are.
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So
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Lisa Nichols: And here we are.
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I know you and I had a one day
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where we sat down at lunch together.
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And, after hearing your story, I'm like, Brandon, I really
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if you're open to it, I really want you to come on to the
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Something Extra podcast because you have got quite the story
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that I really do believe God's gonna use to help a lot of people.
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So I'm just really excited about it, but let's go back.
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I know that you're native of Arizona.
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Yep.
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Now tell me about this.
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I did not know this about you until I started researching, but I know
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you were in the marching band, and you played the sousaphone.
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Brandon Bettis: I did.
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Yeah.
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Lisa Nichols: So Which is in the the tuba family.
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Brandon Bettis: Yep.
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Yep.
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It's, technically, they're different, but I just call it tuba.
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And, you know, but, yeah, sousaphone is the big instrument.
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My mom loved it because, it was a three hundred person marching band at
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Arizona State University, and and she always loved it because she always knew exactly
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where I was.
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Because I was the tallest person on the field with carrying the tallest instrument,
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and she could pick me out of a three hundred person marching band.
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But, yeah, sometimes when I share my testimony in different audiences because I I
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share my testimony a lot with military and first responders and, like
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Lisa Nichols: Yes.
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Brandon Bettis: You know, like, men men and and and part of it is men aren't
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very good at being vulnerable.
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We're not good about sharing our deepest, darkest secrets because Right.
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We wanna we wanna keep those to ourselves and think that I'm the only
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person struggling with whatever you're struggling with, whatever traumas you had in your life.
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Mhmm.
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And so I kinda use that as a joke and icebreaker where I, you
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know, kinda pretend I'm getting emotional.
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I was like, you know, there's a part of my testimony I don't like
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to talk about in front of manly men.
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And I
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Lisa Nichols: I thought about
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Brandon Bettis: I was a band nerd.
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And I I played in the marching band, and I loved it.
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I I really enjoyed it.
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And the cool part about that story is that's how I met my wife.
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Lisa Nichols: Yes.
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That's how you met Erin, I think.
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Right?
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Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
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So we were, you know, part of the marching band, and I like to
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joke that I'm the man of her dreams, like, literally.
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We we had friends together, but she had a dream one night about,
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running through a field of wheat with a guy.
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And she wakes up and she's like, who is that?
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That was weird.
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I I have no idea who this person is.
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And the next day, she saw me at band practice from from across the
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field, and she's like, wait a minute.
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That's the guy from my dream.
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And, she asked her friend.
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She's like, who is that?
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And I was fairly, you know, well known in the band mostly for my
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shenanigans and,
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you know, just being a dumb college kid.
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And, and she's like, you don't know you don't know Brandon?
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Like, everyone knows Brandon.
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And so she started watching me over the next couple weeks.
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And I have no idea what she saw in me, but,
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I mean, I was just I had an afro, and I was just a
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I was burping, and I was just a drunkard.
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And for some reason,
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you know, she put it in the ear of her friend that said, hey.
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Someone has a crush on you.
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And as soon as I saw her, I was like, well, I have a
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crush on her too.
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And so and we started dating, and that was, that was about twenty three
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years ago.
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So we've been together since.
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So
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Lisa Nichols: Oh my goodness.
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And you have two beautiful girls now that we'll talk about Yeah.
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Brandon Bettis: In a
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Lisa Nichols: little bit.
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Brandon Bettis: Seventeen and fourteen.
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Right?
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Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
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Yes.
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Kennedy and Whitney.
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Brandon Bettis: Yes, ma'am.
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I like
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Lisa Nichols: love both of those names.
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I love both of those names.
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Well, you you went from being a band nerd to
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an infantry officer in the army.
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Tell me about that story because you spent ten years,
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and you did a lot, and we're gonna talk a little bit about that.
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But what was that?
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Did you always know that you wanted to be in the military?
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You did.
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Brandon Bettis: Yep.
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Yeah.
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My dad was a Green Beret in Vietnam.
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He wasn't, like, a super stud soldier, you know, but, you know,
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he he had a Green Beret.
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He served a couple years.
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I think he only served about three or four years in the army.
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But as a young man, as a young kid, I would see his military
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equipment.
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And, you know, I just I you know, being a young boy, like, just
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growing up playing bad guys and playing war and playing GI Joe and
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stuff, that that seed was planted in me very early on
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Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
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Brandon Bettis: To serve my country and and be be a be a soldier.
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And so, in fact, you know, dating my wife, like like, I almost
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dropped out of college after nine eleven to go join, like, right away.
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And,
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and I had some wise counsel that said, hey.
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You know, finish school.
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The war will still be there.
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And, you know, early on, I was like, no.
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It's gonna be fast.
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Like, I need to go over there, and I need to go do the
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thing.
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And so I listened to the wise counsel, got my degree, and then went
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as an officer.
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But but, yeah, like, even even dating Aaron, it was about three, four
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months into our relationship.
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It was it was starting to get serious.
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And, I I told her foolishly, I said, hey.
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If you ever make me choose between you and the military, like, I'm I'm
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choosing the military.
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Like, I I need to go serve my country.
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Lisa Nichols: Right.
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Brandon Bettis: I want to go serve my country.
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So, yeah, that was I was laser focused on, going in the military.
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Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
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Well, thank you.
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Thank you, Brandon, for your service.
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Thank you for your service.
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You, wait.
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Tell me this.
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Like, what my dad was a marine.
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My father-in-law was a sergeant in the army.
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My husband's uncle was a Green Beret.
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I mean, we didn't go in the military, but my dad always said the
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military will turn a boy into man faster than anything.
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Absolutely.
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Yeah.
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I mean, the things that you learn.
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Right?
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You know, what did you what did it really teach you about stewardship,
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Brandon, that you've even carried into your civilian world?
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Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
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I think the biggest things it taught me as far as, you know, just,
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like you said, turning a boy into a man.
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There's a lot that goes into the military.
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Even if you don't serve in combat, even if you don't serve a long
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career, but just that, that mentality of of breaking
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people down, like, the military does a good job of,
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you know, just learning a discipline, learning character, learning
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how to work hard, learning real resiliency.
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There's so many tangible skills, life skills that the military
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can teach people.
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Mhmm.
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I'm a I'm a big believer and proponent of the military is going to,
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expand whoever you are, before you join.
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So if you're
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Lisa Nichols: I like that.
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Brandon Bettis: You know, if you're if you have if you're a wayward person,
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and and and, unfortunately, there's a lot of people that go into the military
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and they leave worse.
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Mhmm.
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It'll it'll expand your natural character.
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So if you're if you have a little bit of leadership, it's going to
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expand it.
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But if you have, just a little bit of rebellion, it might expand
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that too.
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And, unfortunately,
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it can go both ways.
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But for the most part, it really taught me a lot.
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I I think the two biggest things that it taught me, was decision making,
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how to make a decision, how to analyze a problem, handle how to quick
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quickly make a decision.
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And then number two, just that general leadership aspect of of serving
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others,
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and going above and beyond to put their needs above your own.
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Mhmm.
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There's a lot of veterans that, you know yes.
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There's national pride.
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Yes.
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There's, you know, dying for the constitution.
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Yes.
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There's freedom.
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Like, all the kind of big hallmark things that people have to hold on
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to.
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Lisa Nichols: Right.
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Brandon Bettis: But the vast majority of of veterans, they say, you know, why did you
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do the thing you did?
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And they'll say, it's because of the guy next to me.
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It's because of the the other men that I served with.
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Like, I'm not brave.
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I didn't do these things.
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It was because I cared more about the person next to me,
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and and it wasn't necessarily for
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freedom.
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We're not we're not trying to, you know, America I don't think America's
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freedom is is at stake, especially my generation.
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Like, our freedom, our constitution was never really threatened,
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but it was more of, just that idea of defending the freedom,
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but then also just defending our brother's total
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Lisa Nichols: The brother brother and sisterhood there.
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Yeah.
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Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
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Lisa Nichols: That's I mean, some of my dad's lifelong friends were from the military.
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Yeah.
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Brandon Bettis: When you go through even even not even without combat, like, when you go
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through hardship with somebody, whatever that hardship is, whether it's just training
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or basic training or it's from the very beginning, you develop that
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bond very quickly.
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So Mhmm.
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Lisa Nichols: Well, yeah.
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And Brandon, that carries on to business.
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Right?
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Because business is made up of people, of teams.
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Right?
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And even going through hard times together brings you strong together,
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makes you stronger together, I think, and, builds that camaraderie.
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Well, I mean, you when you were there, I mean, you you were in
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the military for ten years.
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Well, you're still in the Army Reserves.
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You're still a major in the Army Reserves.
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So you're still serving.
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But you led operations ranging from five people to five thousand,
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which is pretty remarkable.
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And you even served in
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the, Korangal,
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Valley.
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Brandon Bettis: It's France.
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It's France.
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Korangal.
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Lisa Nichols: Korangal?
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Okay.
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Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
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Lisa Nichols: Which is the valley of called the valley of death, right, in Afghanistan.
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Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
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I so I only had, one deployment to Afghanistan and, you know,
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compared to some other people, and and I I don't necessarily compare my career
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to anyone else's.
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But that that valley, it's fairly well known in the military
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community.
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There's a there's a really good
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documentary called Restrepo.
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And Restrepo is about this little small outpost,
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and they had some a couple of photographers over there.
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It's a it's a really well known documentary that shows what it's truly
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like to be in combat.
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And it's probably one of the better ones out there.
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So it's kind of a well known kind of household name, if you will.
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And I was just lucky enough to that's where I was assigned and that's
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what I got to do.
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So I like to joke that, you know, I although I only had one
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deployment, it was kinda like the Super Bowl deployments.
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Lisa Nichols: Right.
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Brandon Bettis: It was like a a really famous area, really well known.
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It's a really small stretch of land in Southeast Afghanistan
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that right up right close to the Pakistan border.
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And even the Taliban, the Taliban used that as their training
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field.
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And so while a lot of other units and most of the mission in
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Afghanistan was to build the government, to build an infrastructure, to build the
14:28
military.
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That was our job in Afghanistan was to build up the Afghan forces
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so they can defend themselves.
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That wasn't our the company I served in.
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We were about a hundred and twenty, individuals,
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soldiers, and I was second in charge of that company.
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So I was the executive officer, but our job was just to fight.
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Like, hard fought was to go fight the enemy.
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And for infantry guys, like, we joined to go fight.
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Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
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Brandon Bettis: So I like to say, like, we got to go do our jobs.
15:00
Yeah.
15:00
But it was it was a lot of fun,
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if you will.
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I know that sounds crazy to a lot of people.
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Lisa Nichols: That doesn't sound like fun, Brandon, but, you know.
15:11
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
15:11
I I like to I like to joke, like, the first time I got
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shot at, it was a lot of fun, because we finally got to
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do what we were trained to do.
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Lisa Nichols: What you came there to do.
15:21
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
15:21
And and I I kinda compare it with with with young men that are
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seeking to join the military.
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I would say, imagine, if you're on a football team or baseball team or
15:30
sports team, and all you do your entire career is practice.
15:35
If all you do is practice, but you never get in the game, you'd
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probably leave that career, you know, feeling lesser, if you
15:42
will.
15:42
Like, man Yeah.
15:43
Like, I got really good at throwing the football.
15:45
I got really good at hitting the baseball, but I never got to go
15:48
compete.
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Yeah.
15:49
And that's that's the best way I can compare it is we got to
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go compete.
15:53
We we got in the game.
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Now the first couple times you're kind of excited.
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You're like, alright cool.
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I get to do my job.
16:00
The the the thirtieth time you get shot at it gets a little old,
16:03
and you're like, okay.
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I'm done.
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Lisa Nichols: I'm pretty tired of being shot at.
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Brandon Bettis: This is not fun anymore.
16:08
Like, at a certain point, we're playing with fate.
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And, that's that's the best comparison.
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So, thankfully, I got out there unscathed.
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Lisa Nichols: Yes.
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Brandon Bettis: Didn't have any injuries or anything like that.
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And and we had a successful deployment.
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So
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Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
16:22
Well, I know you got a bronze star and a combat infantry man
16:26
bad, which is for those that really, did ground combat,
16:30
which you did.
16:32
So let me let me pivot here.
16:34
So, like, after you got out of the military, you went into financial services.
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And I I wanna talk about this, Brandon, this hidden struggle.
16:41
You and I spoke a lot about this when we had lunch
16:46
a couple of months ago.
16:48
But, you know, you were outwardly successful.
16:51
You were financially independent at the age of thirty eight, which
16:55
is pretty incredible.
16:57
Decorated officer, husband to Aaron, father to
17:01
Kennedy and Whitney, but internally, you were struggling really deeply.
17:05
Can you tell us that story?
17:08
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
17:08
So, like, on paper, like, I like to describe my my testimony as,
17:12
like, I had, like, a perfect life.
17:14
I mean, the snapshot of my life was was amazing.
17:18
I was in I was I called myself incredibly blessed.
17:21
So I had two careers that I loved.
17:23
When I when I left the military, I was fortunate enough to to kinda
17:28
land in the financial services world.
17:30
And, again, it was one of those things of serving others.
17:33
And I just I fell in love with, you know, financial services and teaching
17:37
people about, financial foundations, a lot of stuff.
17:40
And so I had two careers that I loved,
17:43
that I was extremely blessed and fortunate to have.
17:46
I had a a beautiful loving wife, that was supportive.
17:50
She was amazing.
17:51
She supported my entire career.
17:53
I had two happy, healthy daughters.
17:56
You know,
17:58
just wonderful
18:00
financial independence, and and I was suicidal.
18:04
Like, I I did not wanna be here.
18:07
When I when I share my testimony, I have a a picture of my
18:11
family kind of a beautiful snapshot of this family or this Hallmark
18:15
family, Facebook family, if you will.
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And, like, that photo does not hang in my house because the day that
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photo was taken, like, I was suicidal.
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And in the in the hardest part when it comes to that, for me
18:29
personally was, it was almost like a frustration in the sense that
18:33
I couldn't pinpoint why.
18:35
Like, I didn't have any major childhood trauma.
18:38
Yes.
18:39
I experienced things in combat, but I didn't have Right.
18:41
Post traumatic stress in the sense of waking up with nightmares.
18:45
I didn't have any vivid images.
18:47
I I didn't have any injuries.
18:50
And and when you can't pinpoint it, like, I didn't have a a
18:54
problem through that.
18:56
Like, I've been trained my entire life.
18:58
Like, there's a problem.
18:59
Let's go solve it.
19:00
But I just had this voice in my head that's, like, you're not good
19:03
enough confidence.
19:05
And and it was it was really it was really difficult.
19:08
Like, when I left the military, it got so bad that when I left
19:11
the military, I kinda had this moment of panic of,
19:15
man, the only thing I've ever wanted to do was be a a soldier,
19:19
and that's now removed.
19:22
So what's keeping me here?
19:24
And I have a small tattoo on my bicep of my daughter's names,
19:28
and the only reason I got that tattoo was because the day I'm holding
19:31
a gun to my head, it would be the last thing I would see,
19:34
and it might stop me.
19:36
It might buy me one more minute, one more hour, one more day.
19:40
It was that it was that bad.
19:41
And and for the longest time, I've been struggling with those thoughts since I
19:45
was a teenager.
19:46
And so I was using things of this world to fill that void.
19:51
So for example, like, when I'm in college, I was like, okay.
19:53
If I just get in the military, everything will be okay.
19:56
Once I was in the military, it's like, well, okay.
19:59
Maybe if I get married and have a family, then everything will be okay.
20:03
And then even in the military, it's like, let me chase more.
20:06
Let me do more.
20:07
Let me get more accomplishments.
20:10
And then so leaving the military, I was like, well, what do I do
20:13
now?
20:13
And then once I got in the financial services world, like, that world is
20:18
abundant when it comes to more, more, more.
20:21
More clients, more money, more success,
20:25
Lisa Nichols: and
20:26
Brandon Bettis: it was endless.
20:27
But then once I got to the point of, well, it's not money anymore.
20:31
Like, I have enough.
20:32
Like, I I I I'm not chasing that anymore.
20:35
It was kind of this kind of crisis moment of
20:38
Lisa Nichols: What is it?
20:38
Brandon Bettis: Man, I gotta start take I gotta focus on
20:40
Lisa Nichols: What is it?
20:41
You know?
20:42
I mean, it's like that's your like Exactly.
20:44
Something is I don't feel purpose.
20:47
I don't feel meaning in my life.
20:49
Yeah.
20:49
What is it that's gonna fill the hole?
20:52
And
20:53
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
20:53
And and it was one of those things where I I I kinda ran
20:57
out of goals.
20:58
Yeah.
20:58
Like, I was like I was like, there's nothing left for me to chase.
21:02
And it it became like a it's I'm like, what's keeping me here?
21:06
What's and not necessarily my purpose because I felt like I had a purpose
21:10
was to serve others, but that wasn't I wouldn't say that wasn't
21:14
enough, but it was just it was like, there's gotta be something more,
21:20
to fill this void,
21:21
Lisa Nichols: to
21:21
Brandon Bettis: fill this hole.
21:23
So that's kinda where I was, before attending a
21:26
Lisa Nichols: program called
21:27
Brandon Bettis: Mighty Oaks.
21:27
Lisa Nichols: And I wanna talk about that, Brandon.
21:30
We're gonna take a quick break, though.
21:32
And I wanna come back, and I wanna get right into Mighty Oaks
21:36
because that's you told me the story, and I
21:40
really think it's gonna help our listeners.
21:42
So we're gonna take a quick break, and we'll be right back with Brandon
21:45
Bettis on the Something Extra podcast.
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22:17
Lisa Nichols: Well, welcome back, everyone, to the Something Extra podcast with my friend,
22:21
Brandon Betts.
22:22
So so, Brandon, we were just talking about suicidal
22:26
thoughts and things that you, you know, you were just trying to fill, and
22:29
you had you had reached the peak.
22:31
You had reached the summit.
22:32
You'd reached financial independence.
22:33
You had a beautiful wife.
22:34
You, you know, were a decorated officer in the military, all
22:39
these achievements, and then something still wasn't right inside.
22:43
You know, what I found ironic is I know that you,
22:48
you know, you I think you served as a suicide prevention officer
22:53
while you were in the army, but you were having these suicidal ideations.
22:57
What does that really say, Brandon, about and it's not just people
23:02
over in the military.
23:02
I mean, there's people all over that wear these masks.
23:07
Brandon Bettis: Yep.
23:07
Yeah.
23:08
That's that's exactly how we describe it.
23:09
It's just you're you're wearing a mask.
23:11
And and and that again, that was a frustrating part of it is because
23:16
what what the world will tell us in the traditional, you know, sense and
23:20
secular sense is they'll they'll kinda tell you, like, hey.
23:22
This is how you get out of it.
23:24
And so, like, being a suicide prevention officer, like, I would give training on,
23:28
like, hey.
23:28
This is what you need to do.
23:29
You need to reach out to a friend.
23:30
You need to call.
23:31
You need to do this.
23:32
You need to do that.
23:33
So I knew what tools to use to,
23:38
you know, not get so hopeless.
23:41
Like, so for example, like, I I could almost see my depression coming in
23:45
slow motion.
23:46
So, like, if I I knew that if I was in that state, I
23:50
couldn't go out and and drown it with alcohol because I knew that was
23:53
dangerous.
23:54
I couldn't, like, have weapons in my house.
23:56
Like, I had to put stop gaps in place.
23:58
I knew what to do, but that then it
24:02
didn't stop those thoughts from coming, and when that voice is in your head,
24:06
like, it is loud.
24:07
It is loud of there's nothing you can do, like,
24:11
it is it is really dangerous,
24:14
and unfortunately, the the secular world, they they use
24:18
it with medication, And there's medication and there's different therapies and there's all these
24:22
different tools that we can add and we can do it.
24:26
But without Christ at the center of it, like, you're toast.
24:29
Like, I and I'm I'm a firm believer in you can you
24:34
there's no pill that's gonna stop it.
24:36
Most medications cause, one of the side effects of
24:40
of the vast majority of medications is suicidal ideations Yeah.
24:44
And suicidal thoughts.
24:45
And so so what do you have to turn to, in the secular
24:50
world without Christ at the center?
24:52
It, is a very dangerous place to be.
24:54
And and I I tried everything.
24:56
Like, I was going to the VA, the veterans administration.
24:59
I was taking pills.
25:00
I was I was I was vocal about it.
25:01
I would I was publishing articles while I was in the military about
25:05
being suicidal, which is, at the time, was almost a career killer.
25:10
When I was about to take command of a company,
25:14
I was gonna publish an article talking about, yeah, I struggle with these thoughts.
25:18
And I had leadership tell me, they're like, hey.
25:20
If you if you publish this, we can't guarantee your career will
25:24
be your career.
25:26
Because it was at the time, like, the military is like, no.
25:28
You don't talk about that.
25:29
Especially senior leaders.
25:30
Right?
25:30
You don't talk about that.
25:31
That's a problem for somebody else.
25:34
You're not allowed to have those thoughts.
25:35
And, thankfully, nothing happened with it, but it was a it was
25:40
a it was a, a battle to be vocal about it,
25:44
but at the same time still be dealing with it.
25:46
Because usually, you know, the solution is like, alright.
25:49
We're gonna we're gonna lock you in a room somewhere for a couple weeks.
25:51
We're gonna take away your shoelaces, and we're gonna lock you in a room
25:54
for a couple weeks, and then somehow you're gonna get better.
25:58
And so there's a lot of different voices out there about here's how we
26:02
solve this problem.
26:04
But without Christ, good luck.
26:07
You're putting it's a band aid
26:08
Lisa Nichols: It's a band aid.
26:09
Brandon Bettis: In my opinion.
26:09
Lisa Nichols: Well, it's kinda like what we said before, and there was a famous I
26:12
think it was Steak Hart that said every man is
26:17
is born with a hole
26:19
in their heart.
26:20
Right?
26:20
A hole in their heart because we were created to have a relationship
26:25
with our Creator.
26:26
Brandon Bettis: Absolutely.
26:26
Lisa Nichols: Right?
26:27
And,
26:29
yeah, nothing nothing satisfies.
26:31
So I really and this is what really got me.
26:35
You you applied to Mighty Oaks, which is a wonderful program.
26:40
You applied in twenty sixteen, but you didn't attend till twenty twenty one.
26:45
I mean, the timing matter.
26:47
But I remember you telling me, Brandon, that you you
26:51
found hope.
26:52
You thought, well, maybe this will give me the hope that I need, the
26:55
tools that I need.
26:56
But then you figured out that there was a little faith component, and you
27:00
were a diehard atheist.
27:01
And you're like, there's no way no way that I am,
27:06
gonna go to this.
27:07
But then you finally did
27:09
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
27:09
Lisa Nichols: Tell us that story, and then I want to know what happened in the
27:13
Ohio wilderness.
27:16
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
27:17
Yeah.
27:17
So,
27:19
and I would I would call myself a diehard atheist, but, but yeah.
27:23
So I applied in two thousand six sixteen when I was leaving active duty.
27:28
At that time, I still have no idea how I first heard about Muddy
27:31
Oaks.
27:31
I have no idea why I fill an application.
27:36
So Mighty Oaks is a peer to peer support program.
27:38
It is faith based.
27:40
It's a national program, and and the cool thing is that they they remove
27:44
any barrier for someone attending.
27:46
So if if nothing else happens from this podcast, I just pray
27:51
that one person puts in an application for Mighty Oaks.
27:55
It it's mighty oaks foundation dot org, and,
27:59
it doesn't cost anything.
28:00
My my sales pitch for mighty oaks is worst case scenario, it's a free
28:04
vacation to a beautiful location with awesome food and good fellowship,
28:09
and that's the worst case scenario.
28:11
It's a break from it's a break from your family.
28:13
It's a free it's a free vacation.
28:16
The best case scenario is one step closer to Jesus and possibly eternal
28:20
salvation.
28:22
And so we try to remove every barrier from someone attending.
28:24
And so when I put that application initially,
28:27
I later found some emails where we're kinda going back and forth, but
28:31
for some reason, I didn't attend.
28:33
I think it was because I was as I was leaving the military, my
28:37
schedule's kinda chaos, and it just kinda fell off the radar.
28:41
And and then in two thousand twenty one, they sent me an email out
28:44
of the blue, again, all timing.
28:47
And at that time, I was looking for any any sort of solution,
28:52
anything.
28:52
Like, I was going down to Mexico to do psilocybin, like mushrooms.
28:56
I was going to the VA.
28:57
I was just I was really tackling this problem.
29:00
And so the timing of the email was perfect, and they said, hey.
29:03
Are you still interested in attending?
29:05
You've never been to a a session.
29:07
Are you interested in attending?
29:08
I just said yes.
29:09
I was like, yes.
29:09
I'll try anything.
29:12
Two days before three days before I was about to fly out, they paid
29:15
for my plane ticket.
29:16
They were gonna send me to Ohio.
29:18
Two days before I flew out, I actually went to the website.
29:21
And I was like, what is Mardi Oaks?
29:23
I have no idea where I'm getting into.
29:24
All I knew is a vet is a veterans program, veterans and first responders
29:29
that dealt with post traumatic stress and depression.
29:32
Lisa Nichols: I was
29:32
Brandon Bettis: like, well, that's me.
29:33
I'll go.
29:35
And then I saw that it was faith based.
29:36
And, yes, I was an atheist.
29:38
Now just to clarify, I I don't believe like, if someone wants to
29:42
call themselves an atheist, I think they have a due diligence to study all
29:46
the world religions with an open heart and an open mind.
29:50
And then after you've studied every religion,
29:53
come to a definitive conclusion there is no God.
29:56
I didn't do that.
29:59
I didn't crack my Bible.
30:00
I didn't I didn't I didn't deep dive into, you know, theology.
30:04
I just I was just a moron.
30:05
I thought I wasn't really anything.
30:07
I was just a moron.
30:08
Right?
30:08
But it is accurate that I didn't recognize a god of the universe.
30:12
I didn't recognize who Jesus was.
30:14
I didn't recognize
30:16
what he did for me.
30:18
And so I I called him up.
30:19
I I sent an email and called him up.
30:21
I said, hey.
30:22
I'm sorry.
30:23
I didn't know what this would that that this would what we're gonna talk
30:26
about was faith.
30:28
This isn't gonna work for me.
30:29
Use my slot for someone else.
30:31
You someone else can use this.
30:33
It's not gonna work for me.
30:35
And they didn't flinch.
30:36
They're like, yeah.
30:37
We know.
30:37
You put it on your application that you're an atheist.
30:40
You're still welcome to be here.
30:43
We might be able to teach you a thing or two, and you might
30:45
be able to, you know, take some tools back.
30:48
And and to this day, like, you know,
30:52
I think that if I could go back in time, if Mighty Oaks would
30:55
have been across the street and for free, I probably wouldn't have shown up.
31:00
But I almost felt guilty that they'd pay for my plane ticket, and I
31:02
was like, I don't want I don't wanna take for my charity.
31:05
I have an offer.
31:05
I was like, I'll pay you back for the plane ticket.
31:08
And and, again, they didn't flinch.
31:10
They're like, no.
31:10
You should show up.
31:11
And so I did.
31:12
I showed up, and I went through the entire week.
31:15
It was in Ohio,
31:17
just east of, Columbus, Ohio.
31:20
Beautiful location.
31:21
It's, like, right on the lake.
31:22
It's like a little these, like, little cabins along the lake house.
31:26
You know, peaceful, serene.
31:27
It was around, like, May, so the weather was good.
31:30
And, I went through the whole week and went through classes that they gave
31:34
us.
31:35
There's classes and there's small group breakouts, and I went through and I wasn't
31:39
I wasn't trying to hide my faith.
31:41
Like, I literally stood up Monday night.
31:42
I was like, I don't know why I'm here.
31:43
I'm an atheist.
31:45
And
31:46
Lisa Nichols: I love your vulnerability.
31:47
Your service tonight.
31:49
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
31:49
I mean, let's be honest.
31:50
Right?
31:52
It's funny because I've talked to some guys later on.
31:54
They're like, yeah.
31:54
We were watching you all week, and they were in the back of their
31:57
mind, they're like, yeah.
31:58
That's not gonna last.
31:59
This this dude, he's toast.
32:02
So but, I mean, there's guys praying for me all week.
32:04
There's guys across the country praying for me.
32:06
I went through the whole week.
32:07
I went through classes, and they have classes on discipline and character and purity
32:11
and forgiveness and, like, really good teaching.
32:14
And it's it's taught by guys that used to be students.
32:18
Every single leader at Mighty Oaks used to be a student, and we found
32:22
hope there.
32:23
And, they teach these class, and we're vulnerable.
32:26
We we we we open up our chest, and we talk about where we
32:30
were and then Christ and then, where we are now.
32:33
And I keep saying
32:34
Lisa Nichols: because you're a team leader now.
32:35
Right?
32:37
Yes.
32:37
Yes.
32:39
Brandon Bettis: But, yeah, I went through my whole the whole week, and I gave my
32:43
testimony on Tuesday on Thursday.
32:46
I talked about, you know, the money.
32:47
I talked about my career.
32:48
I talked about my suicidal ideations.
32:51
And when I got done, one of the other students kind of stopped
32:55
and paused and said, are you still an atheist?
32:58
And I took a second to think about it.
32:59
I was like, yeah.
33:00
I am.
33:01
I don't believe the best way I can describe my faith at that time
33:05
was someone described faith kinda like as a crock pot, and I
33:09
believed in all the ingredients in the crock pot.
33:11
I believed in, you know, love others, be a good husband, be a good
33:15
father, do these things, forgive, but I couldn't wrap my mind
33:19
around the apparatus of a crock pot, of a of a God that
33:23
loved me, a God that created everything,
33:27
and a savior that died on the cross.
33:28
I couldn't wrap my head around that part of it, until the last
33:33
day, the last class, this class called money and possessions.
33:38
And in that class, they share the story of the young rich ruler,
33:42
from Mark ten.
33:44
Or anyone who's unfamiliar with it, a young man runs up to Jesus and
33:47
says, good teacher, what must I do to inherit the kingdom?
33:51
Inhere inherit eternal life.
33:53
And Jesus says, you know, why do you call me good?
33:55
There's only one good that's God.
33:58
And he says, well, follow the commandments.
34:01
And this young man's response is essentially, yeah.
34:04
Yeah.
34:04
I'm I've been doing all that.
34:06
Like, he's works he he's been doing good.
34:08
Right?
34:09
He's like, I'm a good person.
34:11
And then Jesus looks at him.
34:13
He loves him.
34:14
He says one thing you lack, go and sell everything you own and give
34:18
it to the poor, and pick up your cross and follow me, and you'll
34:21
have treasure in heaven.
34:22
And this young man walks away sad because he was very rich.
34:27
And so as soon as they shared that scripture, the instructor that was teaching
34:31
it, a former Navy Seal,
34:34
he says, if Jesus asked, would you give up everything?
34:39
And that question just sat in the pit of my stomach and my heart
34:43
because at that time, as I heard that question, I had an earthly
34:47
earthly net worth of about two point one million dollars.
34:51
And my answer was no.
34:53
I'm like, nope.
34:54
That that's mine.
34:55
I earned it.
34:57
This is my money.
34:58
And I and this was nowhere on my radar when I showed up.
35:01
Like, I was trying to solve other problems.
35:03
I wasn't I wasn't I'm like, I got this part solved.
35:06
Like, I'm good.
35:09
But, man, like, it just really stirred in my heart of
35:13
and when I think back now, obviously, I was idolizing money.
35:15
I was worshiping money.
35:17
I was worshiping the success that I had.
35:20
And then, after that class, we went on what's called
35:24
a reflection walk.
35:25
The reflection walk is meant to be just take a breath
35:30
and everything we've taught you.
35:31
Like, you're drinking through a fire hose all week.
35:33
Like, they're teaching a lot of scripture, a lot of different areas
35:37
of of Christianity, and you're just drinking through a fire hose all week.
35:40
So they said, hey.
35:41
Just pause and stop.
35:43
And I just got out of there, and I left everything behind, and I
35:46
just started walking.
35:48
And I started walking up a hill, and off to the left is a
35:51
body of water, off to the right is the thicket of trees.
35:54
And they told us to stay off a road.
35:56
There's a country road where people drive up and down that road pretty fast.
36:00
They're like, hey.
36:00
Stay off of that.
36:01
So in my mind, I have to go left or right.
36:05
And as I start to get to the top of this hill, I I'm
36:07
going left.
36:08
I'm going left.
36:09
I'm gonna go sit by the water and think.
36:12
But as I get close to the top of the hill, I can see
36:14
a small path off to the right.
36:17
And it was a very clear sign.
36:19
I was like, okay.
36:20
Something's telling me to go right.
36:22
I should go right.
36:24
As I get to the top of the hill, that path that was my
36:27
path that I had hoped for was basically a small gravel
36:32
kinda cutout, probably about twenty feet long that led to an electrical
36:36
box.
36:37
And so, essentially, I was at a dead end.
36:40
And I stood there and I just broke down and started crying,
36:44
and I was getting upset.
36:45
I was getting mad.
36:46
I I I joke.
36:47
I'm like, man, I just I'm going to the VA.
36:50
That's not working.
36:50
I'm taking all these medications.
36:52
That's not working.
36:53
I'm I'm doing all these things I'm supposed to be doing.
36:56
I'm going to therapy.
36:57
I'm doing all these things I'm supposed to be doing.
36:59
It's not working.
37:01
I just spent a week at Duke's boot camp.
37:03
That didn't work.
37:04
I was, like, so frustrated.
37:06
I was like, what do I do now?
37:08
Like, I'm gonna go home.
37:09
I'm gonna have the same problems, the same issues, but now I have
37:13
no idea what else to try.
37:15
I've I I can't solve this problem.
37:18
And I sat there, and I I just I was by this time, I
37:21
was praying, and I I kind of even joke with God.
37:25
I'm like, okay, God.
37:26
Like, this is a funny joke.
37:27
Like, if if you meant for this path to lead me somewhere,
37:31
Lisa Nichols: like, it's a
37:31
Brandon Bettis: dead like, I get it.
37:33
You know, God has a sense of humor, but he's not always funny.
37:36
But
37:38
I just sat there and prayed, and I was, like, broken.
37:41
And I had, like, a a piece of paper with some questions on it,
37:45
and nothing's hidden nothing's hidden.
37:47
And then, eventually, I go back to that question of, would you give up
37:50
everything for Jesus?
37:52
And, again, my answer was no.
37:53
But then I started thinking about my family and in my legacy.
37:58
And I started thinking about, like, if there was a scenario where my daughters
38:02
needed life saving surgery, and before the surgery, the doctor
38:06
came out and said, by the way, this operation costs everything you own.
38:11
Would you pay it?
38:13
Of course.
38:13
Like, any any parent would.
38:15
I take the shirt off my back.
38:16
I'd save my child.
38:18
Okay.
38:18
How about your wife?
38:20
Well, same question, same response.
38:23
When I reframe that question of that's what that means of Jesus
38:27
didn't want my money.
38:28
He doesn't want my stuff.
38:30
He just wants all of me.
38:32
And how much am I worth?
38:34
Like, how much how much is my soul worth?
38:38
As soon as I said yes, like, I believed.
38:41
I was like, yes.
38:42
You can have everything.
38:43
And as soon as I said that, like so I like to say, like,
38:46
I didn't accept Jesus Christ.
38:47
Like, I submitted to him.
38:50
And as soon as I said yes, I could believe in a god universe.
38:53
I believe in every word of scripture.
38:55
I believe he died for my sins.
38:56
And it was just it wasn't like a lightning bolt, but it was a
38:59
lightning bolt moment of it was a true heart change
39:03
of, you know, the holy spirit reaching in and ripping out my heart of
39:07
stone and turning into a heart of flesh.
39:09
And so I was saved on May twenty first two thousand twenty one at
39:13
approximately eleven AM on the side of the road in the middle
39:15
Lisa Nichols: of a In a dead end on a dead end.
39:17
And I think you told me, Brandon.
39:20
And I was just like, gosh.
39:21
That's so metaphorical.
39:24
You didn't really realize it, but it was something like a sewer station.
39:29
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
39:29
Yeah.
39:30
And I
39:31
Lisa Nichols: was like, how metaphorical is that?
39:34
Brandon Bettis: I know.
39:35
Like, I love sharing my testimony.
39:37
Just shows God's glory.
39:39
And and I've been I was sharing it for, like, probably two years.
39:43
I would share at my yolks when I was going through as an instructor.
39:46
I shared it on stage.
39:47
I've shared it, like, at line in Starbucks.
39:49
I've shared my testimony in so many different ways.
39:52
And for the longest time, I would share it.
39:53
And I would always describe, like, that little corner or that little dead
39:58
end as, like, a power box.
40:00
There's some people that are like, oh, you found your power.
40:02
I'm like, I didn't really think of that, but, like, they're like it's like
40:05
a Yeah.
40:06
It's like a utility box in the middle of this field.
40:08
And I was sharing it one time in Ohio, actually, and a buddy of
40:12
mine comes up.
40:13
He's like, hey.
40:13
You know that's not, like, an electrical box.
40:15
Right?
40:16
I was like, oh, what is it?
40:17
Like and he's like, that's the septic pump station.
40:20
And so, like, whenever I go back to visit Ohio, I I go to
40:24
my spot.
40:25
Right?
40:25
And, like, I'll pray, and I I view that as my former grave.
40:29
I'm like, that's where the former brain is buried.
40:32
That's my grave.
40:32
I get to go visit my grave, and I get to worship.
40:36
I still cry every time I go there, but I cry for different reasons.
40:41
And and he's like he's like, yeah.
40:42
That's the septic that's the septic tank.
40:45
And so the old brain is buried in septic tank.
40:45
Septic tank.
40:45
And at
40:48
septic tank.
40:49
And at first, I was like I was like I was like, I still
40:51
go up there and hang out.
40:52
Like, I'm just hanging out on top of the septic.
40:54
And he's like, he's like, yeah.
40:54
I know.
40:55
That's why it's funny.
40:56
Oh my goodness.
40:57
It actually makes it makes the testimony a
40:59
Lisa Nichols: little bit more.
41:00
Oh my goodness.
41:00
Oh my goodness.
41:01
Well, I just, God does have a sense of humor.
41:05
You know?
41:05
But I was just thinking, Brandon, because you didn't tell me about the,
41:09
you know, that they had talked about the story of the rich young ruler.
41:13
But, you know, I mean, Jesus said, go and sell all that you have
41:17
and give it to the poor.
41:19
And I'm just thinking you probably had these thoughts.
41:21
I mean, the thing is he he gave up everything for us.
41:27
He gave up everything for us.
41:29
Right?
41:29
He left heaven.
41:30
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
41:31
So And even even in scripture, there's a lot of people that will,
41:35
you know, that young rich ruler that kind of assume, like, okay.
41:38
So, you know, I can't be wealthy and and follow Christ.
41:41
It's like that's not what that means.
41:43
But there there are scriptures even even later in passage scripture says, you know,
41:47
whoever's willing to live up give up your wife, give up your kids, give
41:50
your brother, give up your sister.
41:51
Like, we have to be get to the point of being willing.
41:54
It doesn't mean you have to give it up, but be willing to give
41:57
everything up.
41:59
You know?
42:00
And and I found that out later when I when my wife and I
42:03
went through restoration of our marriage of, like, I had to get to the
42:05
point of being willing to give up everything, and and that's truly
42:09
what it means.
42:11
He's not telling us to give up everything, but just that heart posture
42:16
of truly releasing whatever we're holding to.
42:19
Surrendered.
42:20
Lord and Balm.
42:21
Yeah.
42:21
Surrender surrender, submit.
42:24
Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
42:24
Well, gosh.
42:25
I've still got lots of things I wanted to talk to you about, but
42:28
we are running out of time here.
42:30
I want you just to walk us through real quickly, and then we'll get
42:34
into, something I share.
42:36
One of the the cool things about it is Erin and the girls were
42:40
baptized after that, and you guys are all walking with Jesus
42:44
now, which is so cool.
42:46
But I would love for you to talk about the four b's real quick
42:50
and resilience.
42:51
What are the four b's?
42:54
Brandon Bettis: Yeah.
42:55
Yeah.
42:55
So the biggest thing that we try to teach at My Yokes, there's a
42:58
lot that we try to teach.
42:59
Right?
42:59
But we we have a, these four pillars that we
43:03
stand on even as leaders, and we try to teach them to other guys.
43:07
We call it the four b's, and the four b's are being the word,
43:10
being prayer, being fellowship, and being contact with your corner
43:14
man.
43:15
So the first two are fairly self explanatory, like, knowing God's word,
43:19
having a study plan, like, like, meditating on his word, like,
43:24
like knowing it.
43:25
Being in prayer is just constant conversation of, you know, we believe in
43:29
the power of prayer,
43:31
praying, asking, and just having that communication to build that
43:35
relationship and and not necessarily a formal prayer.
43:38
There's a lot of people that don't know how to pray.
43:41
It's just like it's just a conversation with god.
43:44
And then being in fellowship is being in a good bible teaching church,
43:48
serving in the church, helping the church grow, being a being a part
43:52
of a body of believers on a regular basis.
43:55
And then the fourth one, to be in contact with your corner man, that
43:59
one's probably the most difficult for most most people.
44:02
And we use the analogy of when you're in a fight, because the founder
44:06
of Mighty Oaks used to be an MMA fighter.
44:09
So we use that it's a spiritual warfare.
44:12
When we're in spiritual warfare, we're typically alone.
44:15
And most men love to fight alone.
44:17
Like like, we got this.
44:18
I I know what I'm doing.
44:20
But but when there's a break in the fight, the bell rings, and you
44:25
go back to your corner, and you go back to a brother that you're
44:27
transparent with and that they know you.
44:29
They know you intimately.
44:31
They know your struggles.
44:32
They're praying for you.
44:34
And he's kinda whispering in your ear or he's yelling in your ear, like,
44:38
hey, dummy.
44:38
Like, maybe give up drinking.
44:40
Hey, dummy.
44:41
Like, maybe go ask for forgiveness.
44:43
Hey, why are you treating your wife this way?
44:45
So it's a it's a relationship with another brother, another Christian
44:49
brother, to lean on in hard times, to celebrate in
44:53
good times, and building that relationship.
44:56
And that's usually a typical one that most men, they're really good at isolating,
45:01
and we don't wanna talk to anybody about our problems.
45:03
And so those are the four pillars that we we really, emphasize
45:07
of here's okay.
45:09
Here's here's the gospel.
45:11
Step one is submit your life to Christ, being saved, you know,
45:15
but then here's how you walk it out.
45:17
Forever.
45:18
Like, here's how you walk out.
45:19
Here's the tools.
45:20
Here's the training program of when life gets difficult.
45:23
What are you gonna do?
45:25
It'd be more of those things.
45:26
Is that
45:26
Lisa Nichols: is that in your corner man
45:29
or corner woman.
45:31
Yeah.
45:32
Absolutely.
45:34
Do MMI too.
45:35
So
45:38
Brandon Bettis: We all need we all need that fellowship.
45:40
We all need someone to talk to, when life gets difficult just for that
45:44
wisdom and that counsel, and getting the right counsel.
45:47
Lisa Nichols: So I completely Yeah.
45:48
We were made we were made to do life with each other, not not
45:52
in isolation.
45:53
And I think that that is, you know, that's dangerous.
45:58
I mean, leaders can can fall into that where they're in isolation.
46:03
So, gosh, Brandon, this has been so good.
46:06
I I could just keep going and going and going.
46:08
I wanted to talk to you about your favorite Bible verse, all of those.
46:12
I don't know if you have one that you can just rattle off real
46:15
quick, and then we're gonna talk about something extra.
46:18
Brandon Bettis: I like Galatians two twenty.
46:21
I've been crucified with Christ.
46:22
It's no longer, he who I who live, but he who lives in me.
46:27
That's probably that's probably one of my go tos.
46:30
I'm I'm actually really God did not give me the gift of memorizing scripture.
46:34
And every time I have a favorite Bible verse, like, the next
46:37
Lisa Nichols: week, I'll go over it.
46:38
Yeah.
46:38
This one's my favorite.
46:39
Yeah.
46:40
Brandon Bettis: John fifteen is a good one too with the divine and address.
46:43
And we actually talked
46:44
Lisa Nichols: about how to
46:45
Brandon Bettis: realign, like, to abide
46:46
Lisa Nichols: Yes.
46:46
Brandon Bettis: Abide in Christ.
46:48
That's that's a big one for me.
46:50
But, yeah, there's almost too many there's almost too many to list.
46:53
Lisa Nichols: You know, and it's cool because certain scripture will speak
46:58
words and hope into your life at certain times.
47:00
Right?
47:01
So, depending upon what you're going through.
47:04
Well, let me ask you this.
47:05
This is called something extra.
47:07
What do you believe every leader needs, Brandon?
47:12
Brandon Bettis: I would say humility.
47:14
I think I think that's the biggest thing for a leader.
47:16
And, you know, across the board, right, there's a when you when you find
47:20
a good leader and you you you say, hey.
47:23
I wanna follow that person.
47:26
Typically, if they don't have some sort of humility,
47:29
and that and you can kind of translate that into, like, service and a
47:33
servant leader.
47:34
I I know servant leaders kinda tossed around and is a kind of buzzword,
47:39
but really what that I think what it comes down to is that humility.
47:42
And and for any leader out there, I think there's a
47:47
there's a great disservice that we do in the leadership community is
47:51
that there's a lot of really good leaders that are bad followers.
47:55
And and that's one of the biggest things I took from my time in
47:57
service in the military and even even the positions I'm
48:01
in now.
48:03
It's really easy to I think sometimes it's easier to lead in
48:07
certain situations, but, man, sometimes it's really hard to follow.
48:12
And so I think if leaders can especially young leaders trying to develop their
48:15
leadership, learn how to be a great follower, and and that will kinda
48:19
help with with the leadership.
48:20
I think that's one thing that served me well in the military is,
48:25
especially, you know, there's kind of a disconnect with leaders.
48:27
There's officers and there's NCOs, and there's a lot of officers I've seen that
48:31
they have this kind of air superiority.
48:34
I'm like, well, I'm in charge, so you're gonna follow me no matter what.
48:38
But I always took an approach of we all bleed the same blood, and
48:41
I'm not better than you.
48:43
Like, there's there's there's so much that I can learn from a brand
48:47
new private or or someone who's only been two or three years.
48:52
There's so much that I can learn from that person, but I need to
48:54
be able to humble myself and and
48:58
and and be willing to learn and be willing to follow.
49:01
And the military military is a really unique environment where
49:05
no matter what room you're in, we all know who has the highest rank.
49:10
Really weird environment where you can look at the rank on the chest, but
49:12
even if everyone in the room is wearing the same rank, then it goes
49:16
down by, okay, who got the rank faster?
49:18
And by default, that person's in charge.
49:21
And by default, every single one of us in that room will follow that
49:24
person.
49:26
The civilian world Right.
49:28
Not so much.
49:29
Civilian world, like, there's a lot of times where it's like there's different titles
49:32
in different directions.
49:33
And so but at the same time, leadership will rise
49:37
to the surface.
49:39
No matter what what the situation is, someone will step up.
49:45
But if it's not me in charge at that moment, I need to be
49:49
a really great follower because now it helps that person
49:53
Yeah.
49:53
Lead.
49:54
So I think I think that's that's something extra that sometimes is missing.
49:59
I I've known plenty of leaders that they lead just based on their title
50:03
or just based on their rank or just based on their experience, but
50:07
you can you can quickly realize, like, man, you you need to humble yourself
50:11
a little bit.
50:11
Like, you're not you're not better than anyone in this room.
50:14
You've just been here, Romeo and I out.
50:15
Lisa Nichols: Well, I always say, Brandon, either humble yourself or be humbled.
50:21
Brandon Bettis: Yep.
50:22
Absolutely.
50:22
Lisa Nichols: You know, there's ways that God uses to humble us too.
50:25
So
50:27
Brandon Bettis: Absolutely.
50:27
And we see that in leadership failures all the time of, you know, leaders
50:31
that fall.
50:32
It's usually because they couldn't humble themselves and and be willing to follow and
50:36
be willing to
50:36
Lisa Nichols: learn.
50:37
I agree.
50:37
Well, this has been so good, Brandon.
50:39
Thank you so much for the conversation, for being
50:44
on the show.
50:45
And, I'm just so grateful to have met you and your, I
50:49
know that your testimony,
50:51
it's gonna be fun to see what God continues to do in and through
50:55
you because, a lot of people need to hear
50:59
your testimony.
51:00
And yeah.
51:02
Brandon Bettis: Well, thank you.
51:02
Thank you, Lisa.
51:03
I always I always I I I enjoy hearing that because I have
51:07
a hard I used to have a really hard time sharing my testimony, but
51:11
the more I've I've kinda heard that that, you know, it might reach someone
51:14
else.
51:15
And I've gotten much more comfortable with if if it helps
51:19
one person, great.
51:21
I gotcha.
51:21
Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
51:21
Brandon Bettis: We're just planting seeds.
51:23
So the more that I can share it with, the better, but
51:27
not from my perspective.
51:29
Lisa Nichols: Amen to that.
51:29
Amen to that.
51:30
Well, thank you again.
51:32
Enjoy the rest of your day, and, I can't wait to see you again
51:36
face to face.
51:38
Alright.
51:39
You take care.
51:40
Brandon Bettis: Thanks, Lisa.
51:41
Announcer: Something extra with Lisa Nichols is a Technology Partners production.
51:45
Copyright Technology Partners Inc twenty nineteen.
51:48
To learn more about this week's guest, check out the show notes at tpi
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