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The Breakfast Club BEST OF(Mel Robbins, Dawn Staley, And Tank Interview, Arguments in Relationships Topic) · The Breakfast Club

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: I like you because it has impact, you know, and
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: people hold on to some of these gems y'all made.
• 0:08
  Speaker 2: Joe Monty bro, I'm a breakfast cluk.
• 0:11
  Speaker 3: I'm feeding off maybe you guys.
• 0:15
  Speaker 4: People watch the breakfast cloud for who's really tuned in?
• 0:19
  Speaker 5: Your interviews are quite challenging.
• 0:21
  Speaker 6: Somebody gotta door.
• 0:22
  Speaker 3: It's like I watched y'all show in the morning, like
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: you guys have the voices of the morning.
• 0:32
  Speaker 5: DJ NVY just hilarious, Charlemagne to God.
• 0:36
  Speaker 7: Everyone just kept telling me the preference.
• 0:37
  Speaker 2: Which crazy scared of spoky hilarious, crazy scared spoky hilarious?
• 0:46
  Speaker 8: Is your time to get it off your chest, whether
• 0:49
  Speaker 8: you're man.
• 0:50
  Speaker 5: Or blessed, time to get up and get something.
• 0:53
  Speaker 9: Call up now eight hundred five eighty five one O
• 0:55
  Speaker 9: five one. We want to hear from you on the
• 0:57
  Speaker 9: breakfast glove. Hello, who's this here?
• 1:00
  Speaker 3: You get it off your chest?
• 1:03
  Speaker 10: I should have said anonymous, but it's too late.
• 1:06
  Speaker 5: Now definitely, what's up?
• 1:08
  Speaker 7: You notice the radio? Can't nobody? You can call it
• 1:10
  Speaker 7: me and be like, my name is Sally.
• 1:12
  Speaker 10: I get it. But what I'm about to say everybody
• 1:15
  Speaker 10: gonna know is.
• 1:17
  Speaker 5: Go ahead, just say it. Go for it. I do
• 1:20
  Speaker 5: it all the time.
• 1:22
  Speaker 10: And and arth may I know you probably don't remember,
• 1:25
  Speaker 10: but about a year ago, I got going the radio
• 1:27
  Speaker 10: and I was bunching on the phone with my with
• 1:29
  Speaker 10: my food, and y'all was like, put him on the phone.
• 1:32
  Speaker 10: I was like, nah, he on the other phone, so
• 1:34
  Speaker 10: I couldn't do it. But I need him to leave
• 1:36
  Speaker 10: me alone.
• 1:37
  Speaker 3: Now, Damn, damn, before you wanted him.
• 1:39
  Speaker 5: Now it's.
• 1:42
  Speaker 3: You said what I said before you wanted him. Now
• 1:44
  Speaker 3: it's a rap.
• 1:45
  Speaker 10: It's a rap, like leave it alone. What more dudes
• 1:49
  Speaker 10: are trash?
• 1:51
  Speaker 7: He said Baltimore dudes, she sure did as for real?
• 1:56
  Speaker 10: Yeah, for real, for real.
• 1:58
  Speaker 7: You don't agree with her? Yeah, I agree with.
• 2:03
  Speaker 5: Damn.
• 2:03
  Speaker 10: So I need Joseph leave me alone. Don't textical, don't
• 2:11
  Speaker 10: stop me on social media, don't leave me alone.
• 2:14
  Speaker 11: Let it do.
• 2:15
  Speaker 10: It's over.
• 2:16
  Speaker 7: I would hope that y'all had this conversation before you
• 2:18
  Speaker 7: called the radio, Damn, began said.
• 2:21
  Speaker 2: I would hope that y'allould had this conversation before he
• 2:24
  Speaker 2: called the radio.
• 2:25
  Speaker 10: Oh well, I told him. I had to tell him yesterday.
• 2:28
  Speaker 10: I was like, leave me alone. Due just not Yeah, he.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: Well, listen, you can't be having unprotected sex with a
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: person and you know, thank you.
• 2:41
  Speaker 10: Let's not trying to tell him he don't get it.
• 2:44
  Speaker 7: You it takes to do that man.
• 2:47
  Speaker 10: No, no, he is the one that's having multiple.
• 2:51
  Speaker 7: Oh got you? So he gave you confection something?
• 2:54
  Speaker 10: Oh well, we don't want to go there.
• 2:56
  Speaker 11: But I did it all right, do you know what
• 3:01
  Speaker 11: I'm saying?
• 3:02
  Speaker 10: Like yeah, like, and I live in another state. Like,
• 3:06
  Speaker 10: if you want to go out and nash, she just
• 3:08
  Speaker 10: smashed somebody with a condom, that's cool because I never know.
• 3:11
  Speaker 2: So we caught you just passing through, and that's I
• 3:13
  Speaker 2: ain't got you.
• 3:16
  Speaker 10: What you get?
• 3:18
  Speaker 5: What did you wind up getting?
• 3:21
  Speaker 6: I'm sorry, I ain't gonna go there.
• 3:22
  Speaker 7: Little chlamydia law. That ain't funny.
• 3:31
  Speaker 5: I'm sorry, mama.
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: I'm so sorry for you too.
• 3:35
  Speaker 10: I gotta laugh about it one time.
• 3:37
  Speaker 12: Little little common case of chlamydia. Is it curable? Of course,
• 3:42
  Speaker 12: I'm not talking about chlamydia. I'm talking about what she
• 3:44
  Speaker 12: got is cured. I don't know what the I.
• 3:48
  Speaker 7: Don't know this like, I don't know.
• 3:51
  Speaker 10: It's definitely terrible, you know, just throwing throwing yourself off,
• 3:55
  Speaker 10: that's that's normally what it is. Just throwing off the cake.
• 3:58
  Speaker 7: I get it to hurd the girl.
• 4:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, well, I'm sorry, mama.
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: We wish you the best, and I hope that he
• 4:04
  Speaker 2: does leave you alone. I hope he falls all the
• 4:06
  Speaker 2: way back. You just put him on blast, you put
• 4:08
  Speaker 2: his whole name out there. Hopefully he leaves you alone.
• 4:10
  Speaker 13: And hopefully the girls that he listened, that that's listening,
• 4:13
  Speaker 13: he leave him alone too, because they got the rastle
• 4:15
  Speaker 13: dazzle too.
• 4:16
  Speaker 5: Damn Jesus.
• 4:17
  Speaker 7: Good morning. Who's this Mark the waant Brectas Club.
• 4:20
  Speaker 6: This is Uber Mike.
• 4:20
  Speaker 5: How y'all doing, Uber Mike?
• 4:22
  Speaker 7: What's up?
• 4:22
  Speaker 5: King?
• 4:23
  Speaker 6: What's going on?
• 4:24
  Speaker 14: Hey?
• 4:24
  Speaker 6: Charlamagne? You always are promoting your Black Effect podcast?
• 4:29
  Speaker 7: Yes, sir, Black Effect Podcast Network.
• 4:31
  Speaker 6: How can how can I because I have one just
• 4:34
  Speaker 6: a few years on Spotify? How do I like unite
• 4:38
  Speaker 6: with you talking about rodstering and how to navigate? Uh
• 4:42
  Speaker 6: like safety situations for drivers.
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: Damn, you should have been to the Black Effect Podcast Festival.
• 4:47
  Speaker 2: You could have pitched your podcast at the Nissan activation.
• 4:50
  Speaker 7: Man, they had to pitch your podcast next year.
• 4:52
  Speaker 6: I promise, okay, next year for sure. Okay, but I
• 4:56
  Speaker 6: just want to help rivers navigate because a lot of
• 4:58
  Speaker 6: drops to get killed and how to navigate. You know,
• 5:00
  Speaker 6: this is my steping you here with over twenty five
• 5:02
  Speaker 6: thousand trip and I just want to, you know, like
• 5:05
  Speaker 6: give some options to stuff for drivers, how to move,
• 5:08
  Speaker 6: how to navigate.
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: That's good information. Man, hit up Black Effects DM. We
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: got to go on Instagram at Black Effect hit up.
• 5:14
  Speaker 7: Hit up that d okay, I'll do that all.
• 5:16
  Speaker 3: Right, brother, get it off your chest eight hundred five
• 5:19
  Speaker 3: five one oh five one. If you need to vent,
• 5:21
  Speaker 3: hit us up.
• 5:21
  Speaker 15: Now.
• 5:22
  Speaker 5: It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning.
• 5:24
  Speaker 7: I'm telling what's doing on call of you.
• 5:28
  Speaker 8: This is your time to get it off your chest,
• 5:30
  Speaker 8: whether you're mad or blessed. Eight hundred five eight five
• 5:33
  Speaker 8: five one. We want to hear from you on the
• 5:35
  Speaker 8: Breakfast Club.
• 5:37
  Speaker 9: Hello.
• 5:37
  Speaker 11: Who's this Hey? My name is Kelsey.
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: Hey Kelsey, good morning, get out, good morning.
• 5:43
  Speaker 11: So I'm calling from a Lelo. Good morning, Jest, good morning,
• 5:47
  Speaker 11: jay MV, Good morning, Tyler.
• 5:49
  Speaker 7: Night morning.
• 5:50
  Speaker 11: I'm so excited you guys, my daughter sisters laying for
• 5:54
  Speaker 11: me to call it in and.
• 5:55
  Speaker 16: To get off my chest.
• 5:56
  Speaker 11: Anyway, I'm excited just to call in radio talk to
• 6:01
  Speaker 11: you guys. I would listen to you guys every morning
• 6:03
  Speaker 11: on my way to work. Okay, so I'm calling it
• 6:09
  Speaker 11: off my chest. So it's very hard dating in Atlanta.
• 6:12
  Speaker 11: I'm new to the area. So not only do I
• 6:15
  Speaker 11: have to dodge, you know, the undercovers, the.
• 6:17
  Speaker 17: D l men, I have to dodge like the princesses,
• 6:28
  Speaker 17: the men that want you to run after them.
• 6:31
  Speaker 11: So I recently just kind of got blocked by this guy.
• 6:34
  Speaker 11: So I guess like online dating is kind of like
• 6:37
  Speaker 11: the way or another way to kind of get out
• 6:40
  Speaker 11: there and see.
• 6:40
  Speaker 6: What you see.
• 6:41
  Speaker 11: So I sign up on this app. Had been talking
• 6:44
  Speaker 11: to this downline just texting. We hadn't been in person
• 6:47
  Speaker 11: or anything like that.
• 6:49
  Speaker 6: Just textings.
• 6:50
  Speaker 11: So I decided to do my little due diligence and
• 6:52
  Speaker 11: look him up online just to kind of see if
• 6:55
  Speaker 11: he really is who he say he is. And I
• 6:58
  Speaker 11: guess he discovered that I looked him up online because
• 7:00
  Speaker 11: after a good week of talking, nothing weird, nothing like that,
• 7:04
  Speaker 11: he checked out to be who he was. He decided
• 7:06
  Speaker 11: he was gonna block me.
• 7:07
  Speaker 7: What did you do?
• 7:08
  Speaker 11: I didn't do nothing but look him up. I guess
• 7:10
  Speaker 11: he discovered that I had went on his Instagram and
• 7:12
  Speaker 11: I checked his linkin you got to make sure he employed.
• 7:17
  Speaker 3: She probably looked at her story, looked at you. When
• 7:19
  Speaker 3: you look at somebody's story, you can see their name.
• 7:21
  Speaker 11: Right, So I'm different. He does me looking at his suck.
• 7:25
  Speaker 16: That's so sad if you're getting to knowing what with.
• 7:27
  Speaker 11: The matter exactly? So I feel like he's being weird.
• 7:30
  Speaker 16: Oh yeah, nah he gay?
• 7:32
  Speaker 5: What?
• 7:33
  Speaker 11: Yeah he's hiding and he's not trying to.
• 7:36
  Speaker 6: Tell me something.
• 7:39
  Speaker 3: Family got to be gay?
• 7:40
  Speaker 5: Yes, bisexual, right if you're using the.
• 7:45
  Speaker 16: Proper He doesn't live in Atlanta.
• 7:47
  Speaker 11: He's from Augusta, but still away.
• 7:51
  Speaker 3: Yeah, you curtified bisexual.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: You come through, come through Atlanta, your fish indeed, and
• 7:56
  Speaker 2: drive back to august Nobody even know by because I'm.
• 8:01
  Speaker 11: Like, he goes to me, he didn't say that sin
• 8:03
  Speaker 11: like we had just like had a conversation on Friday Saturday.
• 8:07
  Speaker 18: I'm blocked.
• 8:10
  Speaker 7: It's all good.
• 8:11
  Speaker 16: Either he got another family or he got a boyfriend.
• 8:14
  Speaker 3: I think he probably got another family, mama.
• 8:16
  Speaker 7: And it might be a family of boys.
• 8:17
  Speaker 11: Yeah, I mean, but it's all good.
• 8:21
  Speaker 10: It's all good.
• 8:21
  Speaker 16: It is all good.
• 8:23
  Speaker 3: Get it off your chest. Eight hundred and five eighty
• 8:25
  Speaker 3: five one oh five to one. If you need to
• 8:27
  Speaker 3: vent hit us up now.
• 8:28
  Speaker 5: It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, the Breakfast Club, Good
• 8:33
  Speaker 5: morning everybody.
• 8:34
  Speaker 3: It's DJ n V Jess, Hilarie Cholamine, the guy. We
• 8:38
  Speaker 3: are the Breakfast Club laya roster feeling and it suggests
• 8:40
  Speaker 3: you got.
• 8:41
  Speaker 5: A special guest in the belty.
• 8:42
  Speaker 4: Yes.
• 8:42
  Speaker 3: Indeed, seems like you're trying to take our job doing
• 8:44
  Speaker 3: all these interviews and stuff. Ladies and gentlemen, we have
• 8:46
  Speaker 3: RB Sai a tat ta.
• 8:48
  Speaker 7: I'm not trying to take your job doing a phenomenal.
• 8:52
  Speaker 5: Guess you are.
• 8:53
  Speaker 9: I am just catering to my people. I'm making sure
• 8:58
  Speaker 9: that my community has a place to go that the
• 9:01
  Speaker 9: conversation is bridged from the old to the news.
• 9:04
  Speaker 7: I love it. You know what I love about the
• 9:06
  Speaker 7: rby Money podcast.
• 9:06
  Speaker 2: There's always so many hip hop podcasts, and you know,
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: the rappers got a place to go, The O g
• 9:11
  Speaker 2: rappers got a place to go.
• 9:12
  Speaker 7: R and B Money has created that space for the
• 9:14
  Speaker 7: R and B world.
• 9:15
  Speaker 9: And now the R and B Music Awards. You guys
• 9:21
  Speaker 9: have a dedicated hip hop not you. Hip hop has
• 9:24
  Speaker 9: a dedicated award show, right whereas the R and B
• 9:28
  Speaker 9: dedicated award show. So that we can cover the entire
• 9:31
  Speaker 9: gambit of R and B. R and B is so
• 9:34
  Speaker 9: many things, it's so vast. You can't cover it in
• 9:37
  Speaker 9: two to three categories at some award show and think
• 9:41
  Speaker 9: that that's going to do it all justice.
• 9:43
  Speaker 2: Oh I want to about this, Yeah, I want to
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: category as an R and B icon like you are.
• 9:51
  Speaker 7: What are the categories of R and B? Because all
• 9:52
  Speaker 7: we think is R and B.
• 9:54
  Speaker 9: Let's go so you get into the songwriter aspect of it,
• 9:59
  Speaker 9: the producer aspect of it, even the performance aspect of it.
• 10:04
  Speaker 9: You know, all of these things are so different. Like
• 10:08
  Speaker 9: Jill Scott is way different from from a Summer Walker,
• 10:14
  Speaker 9: you know what I mean. It's way different. Calvin Richardson
• 10:17
  Speaker 9: is way different from Chris Brown, you know what I mean.
• 10:19
  Speaker 9: And so how do we create these tiers and levels
• 10:22
  Speaker 9: to where all of the nuances of R and B
• 10:24
  Speaker 9: can be recognized?
• 10:25
  Speaker 7: Give me an example of progressive?
• 10:26
  Speaker 9: Oh CB is progressive? Okay, completely, he's the current state
• 10:32
  Speaker 9: of R and B B, you know what I mean?
• 10:34
  Speaker 9: Even if we want to say what what Drake and Party?
• 10:37
  Speaker 5: Just did?
• 10:38
  Speaker 9: You know what I mean? That's very progressive R and B?
• 10:41
  Speaker 9: You know what I mean? If you want to say
• 10:42
  Speaker 9: what is more traditional. I'm more in the middle of
• 10:45
  Speaker 9: a traditional progressive R and B artist because I can
• 10:48
  Speaker 9: do a record with Chris Brown, but you know, I
• 10:50
  Speaker 9: can also do a record with God rest Histo, and
• 10:52
  Speaker 9: you don't.
• 10:53
  Speaker 2: See I like the traditional and I said that when
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: the Party and Drake album dropped, I was like, that
• 10:58
  Speaker 2: ain't for me, and it was like, well, you know,
• 11:00
  Speaker 2: it's for the ladies because the R and B. I'm like, no,
• 11:01
  Speaker 2: God like R and B. I just don't like that
• 11:03
  Speaker 2: type of.
• 11:04
  Speaker 9: Army exactly exactly. There's a difference. And so we have
• 11:08
  Speaker 9: not had the conversation about all of these things together.
• 11:11
  Speaker 9: We just say best R and B album, And then
• 11:15
  Speaker 9: you got Chris Brown in the same category with Robert Glasberg.
• 11:19
  Speaker 7: It's like, how do you do that?
• 11:22
  Speaker 9: We're not all just one thing.
• 11:23
  Speaker 3: So when are you doing this? Is it thought out
• 11:25
  Speaker 3: to that where it's going to happen.
• 11:26
  Speaker 9: It's been, It's it's been great conversations, you know what
• 11:29
  Speaker 9: I mean, Me and my brother Jay Valentine. We've actually
• 11:32
  Speaker 9: had this conversation with Jessic Collins and so you know,
• 11:35
  Speaker 9: all of this, what I'm doing right now is just
• 11:37
  Speaker 9: kind of creating the anticipation and the desire and hopefully
• 11:41
  Speaker 9: that enough comments will come and people will see the value,
• 11:44
  Speaker 9: because that's where it starts. People have to see the
• 11:47
  Speaker 9: value in what we do in order to create this
• 11:51
  Speaker 9: next level platform would only.
• 11:53
  Speaker 7: Black effect and I heart out the conversation. You know,
• 11:56
  Speaker 7: to put together a good award show.
• 11:57
  Speaker 9: Well, what do you want to do?
• 11:58
  Speaker 7: I want to help with the Harmby money. That'd be fantastic.
• 12:01
  Speaker 5: There you go done. I want to know how is
• 12:04
  Speaker 5: it for you, right?
• 12:05
  Speaker 3: Knowing all these arm By stories, right, and I'm watching
• 12:07
  Speaker 3: your podcast and I know you know the answers, but
• 12:10
  Speaker 3: some of these times it hasn't been put out there
• 12:12
  Speaker 3: and you're just feeding the.
• 12:13
  Speaker 5: Person, right, Like I look at Stephen Hill. But the
• 12:16
  Speaker 5: Chris Brown.
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: Situation, Yeah, you're leading him because you knew what happened,
• 12:20
  Speaker 3: but making him explain the story was amazing.
• 12:22
  Speaker 9: I didn't know what happened, really, I didn't even know
• 12:24
  Speaker 9: he was part of it. I knew from Chris's side
• 12:28
  Speaker 9: that they had got him all the way to the
• 12:31
  Speaker 9: point of where it happen it was about to happen,
• 12:34
  Speaker 9: and then pulled the rug out from under him. I
• 12:36
  Speaker 9: didn't know the intimate details and who all was involved
• 12:40
  Speaker 9: and herring Steve like Steven is like you know, he
• 12:44
  Speaker 9: loves he loves that, he loves it. He felt like
• 12:48
  Speaker 9: he was getting ready to create one of the most
• 12:50
  Speaker 9: iconic moments of all times, and.
• 12:52
  Speaker 5: He worked for that rehearsal. Jesus, he was.
• 12:54
  Speaker 9: He was, and it hurt him that now he you know,
• 12:59
  Speaker 9: has to go back and tell c B that it's
• 13:03
  Speaker 9: not happening, you know what I mean? Like that, that
• 13:06
  Speaker 9: crushed him more than anything. And he was like, man,
• 13:08
  Speaker 9: if you could ever talk to him, just let him
• 13:09
  Speaker 9: know I love him, I want you know, I wanted
• 13:12
  Speaker 9: that for him. I just they pulled it from me.
• 13:14
  Speaker 9: Nothing I could do.
• 13:15
  Speaker 1: I was going to ask that you put them on
• 13:16
  Speaker 1: the phone after that, because he is send in your
• 13:18
  Speaker 1: interview that they hadn't he hadn't gotten well. He wanted
• 13:20
  Speaker 1: to see him in person to apologize and stuff like that.
• 13:22
  Speaker 5: So no, we didn't.
• 13:23
  Speaker 9: We didn't get a chance to make that happen, Okay,
• 13:25
  Speaker 9: but I'd love to make that happen.
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: For another one of my favorite R and B Money
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: podcasts recently was La Read that was so like he
• 13:32
  Speaker 2: really sparked a real conversation, and it just had me
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: thinking about, yes, you need you need Black Boutique everything
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: you need that.
• 13:41
  Speaker 9: We need to be able to operate the way we operate.
• 13:45
  Speaker 9: Just let us do what we do. Like even with
• 13:48
  Speaker 9: what you guys do. You guys do what you do,
• 13:51
  Speaker 9: which is why it is what it is. There's nobody
• 13:54
  Speaker 9: micro managing or policing you. You get your paycheck, whatever
• 13:57
  Speaker 9: that is. But it's because of how you do your thing.
• 14:01
  Speaker 9: Nobody's interrupting that, which is why it's what how many
• 14:04
  Speaker 9: years in the making, Jesus Christ, Imagine if you had
• 14:08
  Speaker 9: no control of that, you know what I mean. Imagine
• 14:11
  Speaker 9: imagine you being subject to somebody else's ideas, somebody else's
• 14:16
  Speaker 9: and then you lose with that. That hurts worse than
• 14:18
  Speaker 9: anything I lost listening to you. No, no, I'm gonna
• 14:22
  Speaker 9: go down with me. Word, I'm gonna go down with me.
• 14:24
  Speaker 9: And that's what we've lost. We've lost the people that
• 14:28
  Speaker 9: have done it from here. I just believe, Like think
• 14:32
  Speaker 9: about DeAngelo's untitled. If somebody just doesn't say ah, I
• 14:38
  Speaker 9: just I just feel like this is different. They never
• 14:41
  Speaker 9: get to the third single, which is a life changing record.
• 14:45
  Speaker 9: I don't have that no more. I analytics say, we're
• 14:48
  Speaker 9: losing here, We're done, We're gonna.
• 14:49
  Speaker 5: Move on right.
• 14:50
  Speaker 7: Well, how does the Feel? Wasn't a third single?
• 14:52
  Speaker 5: Was it?
• 14:53
  Speaker 7: How does it Feel? With the third single, the butt
• 14:56
  Speaker 7: Naked Video was a third single?
• 14:58
  Speaker 5: Wow?
• 14:59
  Speaker 9: I did not know that.
• 15:00
  Speaker 7: How do we not get to that?
• 15:02
  Speaker 9: Gonna be greatest songs of all time?
• 15:07
  Speaker 7: Wow?
• 15:07
  Speaker 9: You know what I mean? Genuine so anxious. If Joe
• 15:11
  Speaker 9: Moore didn't say we gotta get to this one, we
• 15:13
  Speaker 9: gotta get to this one, This one right here is
• 15:16
  Speaker 9: gonna change it, trust me. Maybe I Deserve was my
• 15:19
  Speaker 9: second single. If we were just going off for first singles.
• 15:22
  Speaker 9: I'm not gonna name the first song I had out,
• 15:24
  Speaker 9: but I was dancing and flipping and blowing up.
• 15:27
  Speaker 7: Yeah, we'll take I remember because I remember Maybe I Deserve.
• 15:31
  Speaker 9: I shouldn't have brought that up.
• 15:33
  Speaker 16: But you said it.
• 15:34
  Speaker 4: I just heard the song.
• 15:37
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 15:38
  Speaker 9: My first single was called Freaking, and it almost destroyed
• 15:43
  Speaker 9: my career before started l The label picked it, but
• 15:46
  Speaker 9: I was very excited about it as well.
• 15:49
  Speaker 7: When I googled it and said song many have missed.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: His Actually first single Freaky, which came out first, and
• 15:55
  Speaker 2: it's pretty much become obscure.
• 15:56
  Speaker 9: Today, I was performing this song. I was on promo
• 16:03
  Speaker 9: tour Fort Valley State Homecoming and I'm you know, I'm
• 16:07
  Speaker 9: coming out. I got my freaky interlude, you know, they
• 16:10
  Speaker 9: want to get freaky. And then the song starts and like,
• 16:13
  Speaker 9: right in the middle of the first hook, these two
• 16:15
  Speaker 9: little cute girls in the first row was like whack.
• 16:19
  Speaker 9: I was like, and this was in the dat tape era,
• 16:23
  Speaker 9: so I couldn't.
• 16:24
  Speaker 3: Start the way through, so damn.
• 16:28
  Speaker 9: Then I sweated the rest of the song and I
• 16:31
  Speaker 9: never sang that song again.
• 16:33
  Speaker 5: Damn.
• 16:34
  Speaker 9: I said, don't put it on the album, erase it,
• 16:37
  Speaker 9: get rid of this song, and we did a hard
• 16:40
  Speaker 9: turn cut. The single went to maybe I Deserve Thank God,
• 16:43
  Speaker 9: Wow in the rest is History? Rests history?
• 16:46
  Speaker 2: Why Broadway right now? Because you are featured in the
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: Luia ki Hell's Kitchen.
• 16:50
  Speaker 9: And it's timing, bro because for me, twenty twenty five
• 16:55
  Speaker 9: was the hard pivot into acting. You know, the music
• 16:58
  Speaker 9: thing has been so much of my bread and butter
• 17:01
  Speaker 9: and so much of my focus for so long. I
• 17:02
  Speaker 9: was like, I gotta get to the other thing that
• 17:04
  Speaker 9: I love. And Charlie mccatt had always been telling me bro,
• 17:07
  Speaker 9: You're gonna have to make a hard pivot in order
• 17:09
  Speaker 9: to really do it the right way. And I was like, Okay,
• 17:11
  Speaker 9: I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do it. And with
• 17:14
  Speaker 9: twenty twenty five coming in the way that it did
• 17:17
  Speaker 9: and having a free moment and opportunity, I'd always heard
• 17:20
  Speaker 9: horror stories about Broadway, you know what I mean, just
• 17:23
  Speaker 9: in terms of the workload and the pay to pay,
• 17:26
  Speaker 9: the facility, all of that, and I was like, yeah,
• 17:29
  Speaker 9: I probably never do Broadway. And then I get, you know,
• 17:32
  Speaker 9: we get this call from Alisha like, hey, Alisha is
• 17:35
  Speaker 9: looking for you to do you know, it's kitchen, ma
• 17:37
  Speaker 9: what And I'm like, you know, the name Alicia Keys
• 17:40
  Speaker 9: is already like that's interesting. Gotta at least see what
• 17:43
  Speaker 9: that's about, right, And so I send some papers over
• 17:48
  Speaker 9: for me to look at. I'm like, okay, I'm looking
• 17:49
  Speaker 9: at it. I'm all right, I'll go see you know
• 17:53
  Speaker 9: what I mean, just out of respect for that name itself.
• 17:56
  Speaker 2: So you go watch the play before you absolutely Okay,
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: So you saw when Brandon be Dixon with.
• 18:00
  Speaker 9: Playing actually well he wasn't. He wasn't there. His sub
• 18:05
  Speaker 9: was in Who's Who's Who's Who's Dope as well, and
• 18:08
  Speaker 9: and I watched to play and I fell in love
• 18:11
  Speaker 9: with it. And the next day was actually my walk
• 18:14
  Speaker 9: in audition, and so I kind of knew where I
• 18:16
  Speaker 9: needed to be and and at that point it was
• 18:20
  Speaker 9: just like, I think it's time. I think I think
• 18:24
  Speaker 9: it is. It has answered the question for me. I
• 18:27
  Speaker 9: you know what I mean. Me and Lulu were telling
• 18:28
  Speaker 9: my manager. Lulu was talking to He's like, I just
• 18:30
  Speaker 9: it just does something different for you, brother, It just
• 18:32
  Speaker 9: does something really different. And in deliberating, I was just deliberating,
• 18:37
  Speaker 9: like is this the time to like just take a
• 18:40
  Speaker 9: hard left and out of nowhere. Charlie met calls me,
• 18:43
  Speaker 9: hadn't talked to in a minute, and he's like, what's
• 18:46
  Speaker 9: going on wrong. I was like nothing, I'm just just chilling.
• 18:48
  Speaker 9: He wanted to come to my Atlantic City show. I'm like, oh,
• 18:50
  Speaker 9: I got you. No, he said, I said, I magic question.
• 18:53
  Speaker 9: I got this on the table right now. And he said,
• 18:55
  Speaker 9: what are you talking about? I said, well asking you.
• 18:57
  Speaker 9: You don't need my opinion. You know what you're supposed
• 18:59
  Speaker 9: to do. There was that here I am And so
• 19:03
  Speaker 9: you know when I said, I said with Alisha the
• 19:05
  Speaker 9: other day learned that in Blackstone and she was like, thank,
• 19:08
  Speaker 9: I just felt like it was you. It's like, I
• 19:11
  Speaker 9: didn't know why. She was like, it was it just
• 19:13
  Speaker 9: to me, it just felt like it was you. And
• 19:16
  Speaker 9: she's like, I didn't even know if you could act.
• 19:18
  Speaker 9: And I was like, you ain't seen me on lifetime
• 19:21
  Speaker 9: or BT. You know what I'm saying a TV one,
• 19:24
  Speaker 9: I'm the Denzel of that space.
• 19:25
  Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying.
• 19:27
  Speaker 9: I'm a Denzel of that space. You ain't sing none
• 19:29
  Speaker 9: of that. But she had never seen me act, and
• 19:31
  Speaker 9: she was like, and then when I saw you in
• 19:33
  Speaker 9: the audition, she was like, I was just blown away.
• 19:35
  Speaker 9: And I was like, no, that's that's what I do.
• 19:37
  Speaker 9: Singing is that's whatever. And so she and I went
• 19:40
  Speaker 9: back and forth, singing back and forth, her, you know,
• 19:42
  Speaker 9: singing her a mailing catalog and my debut on Tuesday.
• 19:47
  Speaker 9: And so now it's like, how tough it is real?
• 19:50
  Speaker 3: How tough is it to rehearsals? And do you have
• 19:52
  Speaker 3: to shut everything else off? And do you have time
• 19:55
  Speaker 3: for yourself now? Because it just seems like A does
• 19:58
  Speaker 3: a stop.
• 19:58
  Speaker 9: I'm a machine. So I'm a routine guy, you know
• 20:02
  Speaker 9: what I mean, so I'm gonna get up, help get
• 20:05
  Speaker 9: the kids to school, do cardio, eat, go to the gym,
• 20:09
  Speaker 9: do the second lift, go to the studio, either work
• 20:12
  Speaker 9: on music or do pod get back, eat dinner with
• 20:16
  Speaker 9: the family, get some lifetime in and the next day
• 20:19
  Speaker 9: do the same thing. I'm a machine. I'm built like that.
• 20:23
  Speaker 9: So Broadway schedule works perfect for who I am now.
• 20:28
  Speaker 9: Eight shows a week crazy. That's where it get different
• 20:32
  Speaker 9: because you know they call it. You know, you have
• 20:35
  Speaker 9: an A show, a B show, and a C show. In
• 20:37
  Speaker 9: terms of how you perform. I've never been able to
• 20:40
  Speaker 9: do a B show and feel good about it, like
• 20:44
  Speaker 9: because all of those people, whether it's a Wednesday or Saturday,
• 20:49
  Speaker 9: they spent their money to see something great. They spent
• 20:53
  Speaker 9: their money to see somebody go all out. So I'm
• 20:56
  Speaker 9: doing a shows from Tuesday this Sunday, and we got
• 21:01
  Speaker 9: one day off that's Monday, and right back to it.
• 21:05
  Speaker 4: What's your rest day? Like on a Monday? Like you vote,
• 21:08
  Speaker 4: you don't?
• 21:09
  Speaker 9: I just I just so I'm going to have my
• 21:12
  Speaker 9: first Monday next to the next Monday. Nothing, go to
• 21:17
  Speaker 9: the gym. You know what I'm saying. He eats, eat
• 21:20
  Speaker 9: some cool food, somewhere, you know, maybe keeping Charlotte Magne
• 21:23
  Speaker 9: and my heart and talk about this.
• 21:25
  Speaker 7: Let's do it awards. What about the family, like.
• 21:28
  Speaker 9: Because family was just here. They came for the for
• 21:32
  Speaker 9: the for the debut, My mom and then came up,
• 21:34
  Speaker 9: wife zoean zign came up, and it was really it
• 21:38
  Speaker 9: was really really cool.
• 21:39
  Speaker 5: Man.
• 21:39
  Speaker 2: The thirteen weeks is a long time to be away
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: from them, especially if you got a routine.
• 21:43
  Speaker 7: Like you said, it's it's.
• 21:45
  Speaker 9: Tougher for them than it is for me because for me,
• 21:48
  Speaker 9: I'm you know, I'm hyper focused. I'm in it, and
• 21:50
  Speaker 9: I have something to do every day, something to look
• 21:52
  Speaker 9: forward to, and so you know the wife is at
• 21:54
  Speaker 9: home doing the kid thing and all that. But that's why,
• 21:56
  Speaker 9: you know, that's what it is. It's a teams marriage.
• 21:59
  Speaker 9: She holds that down. I'm gonna hold this down. But this,
• 22:02
  Speaker 9: to me is like, what's the opportunity for people in
• 22:05
  Speaker 9: that space to understand that I'm serious about going here.
• 22:09
  Speaker 9: You know, Kevin was in town another day, so I
• 22:11
  Speaker 9: went it, you know, saw him and chopped it up
• 22:13
  Speaker 9: with him and he was like, I'm really really proud
• 22:15
  Speaker 9: of you for making this move. It says a lot
• 22:17
  Speaker 9: about the next level of where you can go and
• 22:21
  Speaker 9: who you can be and so that's what I'm looking
• 22:23
  Speaker 9: forward to.
• 22:25
  Speaker 7: Show the night.
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: Yeah, oh I get taken it and take a hell's
• 22:32
  Speaker 2: can you wait one more thing too? Saturday, April twenty
• 22:36
  Speaker 2: sixth is the third annual Black Effect Podcast Festival.
• 22:40
  Speaker 7: Make It Saturday, Taking Jay Valentine is gonna be that
• 22:44
  Speaker 7: he's got.
• 22:44
  Speaker 5: I'll be there one day off, right, Oh that's okay,
• 22:46
  Speaker 5: just making sure one day.
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: Have you have y'all thought about what that's gonna look
• 22:49
  Speaker 2: like live R and B Money Podcast on stage?
• 22:52
  Speaker 9: Nope, Nope, we're thinking about it though, because it's got
• 22:55
  Speaker 9: to be sexy. You know what I'm saying, you know,
• 22:58
  Speaker 9: be singing.
• 22:59
  Speaker 1: Got you don't have to podcast man the podcast, Yeah,
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: exact pod.
• 23:06
  Speaker 9: If the spirit moves them, if you know, if it
• 23:07
  Speaker 9: moves me, then I promise you. Yeah, you know, we
• 23:12
  Speaker 9: gotta we gotta, we gotta figure out what that's going
• 23:14
  Speaker 9: because this will be you know, this will be our
• 23:17
  Speaker 9: first time doing it.
• 23:17
  Speaker 7: Like we do it, the first time doing it live.
• 23:19
  Speaker 9: Well, we've done R and B Live, R and B
• 23:22
  Speaker 9: Money Live the event where it's been strictly catered, where
• 23:26
  Speaker 9: it's banned DJ you know, karaoke vibes like really really dope.
• 23:31
  Speaker 9: We've done that up up in Phoenix has stayed in
• 23:33
  Speaker 9: with one of my guys two spots, so we've done that.
• 23:36
  Speaker 2: But this is for people who like the podcast and
• 23:38
  Speaker 2: enjoy the conversation exactly.
• 23:40
  Speaker 9: So this is pod and conversation. So in terms of
• 23:43
  Speaker 9: trying to figure out what makes ours a little different,
• 23:47
  Speaker 9: you know what I mean, we're still formulating that well.
• 23:49
  Speaker 2: Saturday, April twenty six, third Annual Blaffe Podcast Festival, go
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: get your tickets Black Effect dot Com Slash Podcast Festival.
• 23:55
  Speaker 2: Make sure you check our tank in the Hell's Kitchen.
• 23:57
  Speaker 2: What a weasha keys on Broadway right now.
• 24:00
  Speaker 5: We appreciate you, brother.
• 24:01
  Speaker 9: I'm reporting on y'all. Man If y'all don't y'all don't
• 24:03
  Speaker 9: show up.
• 24:03
  Speaker 7: I don't know all the time.
• 24:05
  Speaker 9: That's one of my I enjoy broad with absolutely, okay,
• 24:08
  Speaker 9: And when I'm not here, you know what I'm saying,
• 24:10
  Speaker 9: I still want to hear somebody say, if you've seen
• 24:14
  Speaker 9: Hell's Kitchen, did you go? Did you you know? Let
• 24:18
  Speaker 9: me tell Alicia in Swiss We'll meet.
• 24:20
  Speaker 2: You, yes, y'all and make sure you subscribe to the
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: R and B Money podcast on the Black Effect I
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: Heeart Radio Podcast Network.
• 24:26
  Speaker 3: That's right, it's tank, ladies and gentlemen. It's the Breakfast Club.
• 24:28
  Speaker 3: Good morning.
• 24:38
  Speaker 7: Opinion to the Breakfast Club.
• 24:39
  Speaker 9: Top Come on, I did five five five one.
• 24:45
  Speaker 3: Morning. Everybody is d J n V Jess hilarious, Charlamage
• 24:49
  Speaker 3: the guy. We are the Breakfast Club. Low on the
• 24:51
  Speaker 3: Rosa filling in for Jess. Now if you're just joining us.
• 24:54
  Speaker 3: Were talking about Swiss beats. He did an interview with
• 24:56
  Speaker 3: US Weekly and he was talking about his relationship with
• 24:59
  Speaker 3: his They've been married fifteen years and he says it's
• 25:02
  Speaker 3: a healthy marriage. And he said, what keeps it so
• 25:04
  Speaker 3: healthy is They said, First, they don't yell at each other.
• 25:06
  Speaker 3: And they said, we've never had an argument.
• 25:09
  Speaker 5: So that is the question.
• 25:10
  Speaker 3: Eight hundred five eight five one oh five to one.
• 25:13
  Speaker 3: Have you never have an argument which your spouse? I
• 25:15
  Speaker 3: can't say that's true for me. Me and my wife
• 25:17
  Speaker 3: are argued. You know, we argue. I mean, it doesn't
• 25:19
  Speaker 3: get to the point where we are yelling and screaming
• 25:21
  Speaker 3: and kicking, but we do argue, you know, we disagree
• 25:24
  Speaker 3: and we have arguments.
• 25:25
  Speaker 7: It is impossible.
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: I meant, I don't sleuth the Swiss and Alicia respected
• 25:29
  Speaker 2: him if they don't argue.
• 25:30
  Speaker 7: But I think that you know, I can't. That is
• 25:32
  Speaker 7: not my household, you.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: Know what I mean? Like you know, we have very
• 25:35
  Speaker 2: healthy debates. We have arguments. We got four kids, different
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: parenting styles, I guess right, but you know we try
• 25:42
  Speaker 2: to come on one accord to have one solid parenting style.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: But yeah, there's gonna always be things that you you know,
• 25:48
  Speaker 2: argue about that don't make it unhealthy. That don't make
• 25:51
  Speaker 2: that you got that don't mean you've got a bad relationship.
• 25:52
  Speaker 2: It's just that you know, that means that you live
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: with a person.
• 25:55
  Speaker 7: Yeah, like I said, I've.
• 25:56
  Speaker 3: Been with my wife thirty one years, we've been read
• 25:58
  Speaker 3: twenty three. We argue like there's things like you said,
• 26:01
  Speaker 3: like I might, you know, discipline my children this way
• 26:04
  Speaker 3: or talk to my children this way. She does it
• 26:05
  Speaker 3: this way, and we go back and forth. But like
• 26:07
  Speaker 3: I said, they ain't to the point where were yelling
• 26:09
  Speaker 3: and screaming and she's sleeping in another room.
• 26:11
  Speaker 5: No, we have disagreements.
• 26:12
  Speaker 2: No, and sometimes you do have to tell the wife
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: that don't talk to me like I'm your child.
• 26:17
  Speaker 4: I know your wife begin with you all the time,
• 26:20
  Speaker 4: all the time.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: But if I think sometimes you know, women, you know,
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: especially when they have a lot of kids, they're used
• 26:25
  Speaker 2: to talking a certain way, and men can be immature
• 26:29
  Speaker 2: at times, so we get spoken to in that way,
• 26:30
  Speaker 2: and sometimes you just have to remind them I am
• 26:32
  Speaker 2: not your.
• 26:33
  Speaker 4: Child, and you get spoken to. You have you have
• 26:35
  Speaker 4: to get at I.
• 26:36
  Speaker 5: Have to a couple of times. I'm not your child.
• 26:39
  Speaker 1: Absolutely, yes, I mean, but I'm here with you every day.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: I kind of feel for your wives.
• 26:44
  Speaker 7: No, you should feel for us.
• 26:47
  Speaker 2: But I mean, listen, once again, respect the swissld Alicia.
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: If they don't argue, God blessed. I don't know if
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: that's realistic. I really don't. Even even with the most
• 26:57
  Speaker 2: healthiest healed couples, I don't know if that's realistic for
• 27:00
  Speaker 2: you to never argue, never nothing like y'all agree on everything.
• 27:03
  Speaker 5: It's never a disagreement. Hello, who's this yo?
• 27:06
  Speaker 7: This Grand Michael the author?
• 27:07
  Speaker 5: Hey, what's up? Grand Michael's the author? Talk to us? Man,
• 27:10
  Speaker 5: what's happening?
• 27:10
  Speaker 2: Man?
• 27:11
  Speaker 14: Y'all can't be serious? Man Like me and my wife
• 27:14
  Speaker 14: been married for twelve years together, fifteen we've never had
• 27:17
  Speaker 14: an argument. I'm never saying we don't disagree, but we
• 27:21
  Speaker 14: have never had an argument like this. That's my home,
• 27:23
  Speaker 14: that's my place of peace, my sanctuary. Like why the
• 27:26
  Speaker 14: hell would I want to bring this cause the immaturity
• 27:28
  Speaker 14: into it.
• 27:29
  Speaker 2: Well, God bless for all of you, y'all, y'all way
• 27:32
  Speaker 2: more hill than me and my household.
• 27:34
  Speaker 7: Or maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm you know what
• 27:37
  Speaker 7: I'm saying.
• 27:38
  Speaker 6: We live in We live in Columbia, South Carolina.
• 27:40
  Speaker 14: Chief of Allendale, Charlamagne, you know about Allendale.
• 27:43
  Speaker 7: Yeah, I was.
• 27:44
  Speaker 6: I ain't trying to get nothing. Oh that's the salt man.
• 27:47
  Speaker 6: I ain't trying to get cut. I ain't trying. So
• 27:49
  Speaker 6: that's how it started initially, I'm saying.
• 27:54
  Speaker 14: As we grew, it just became the norm, like like
• 27:58
  Speaker 14: that's a black man.
• 27:59
  Speaker 6: We got so much going on in the world, Like
• 28:03
  Speaker 6: why do I have to come home to further foolish.
• 28:06
  Speaker 5: You know me?
• 28:07
  Speaker 3: So you never had a heated argument of disagreement with
• 28:10
  Speaker 3: your wife all my life?
• 28:11
  Speaker 2: Never, God bless my brother. I need I need to
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: get the where you at?
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: They said, never, yell, I never had a heat of argument.
• 28:17
  Speaker 1: Their kids had never seen them cuts at each other.
• 28:19
  Speaker 7: I don't know. I don't believe that saluit.
• 28:21
  Speaker 2: Everybody in the metro to to eight or three hot
• 28:23
  Speaker 2: one three nine, that's the station on out there.
• 28:25
  Speaker 5: Hello, who's this you with?
• 28:27
  Speaker 6: Shaking? Making?
• 28:28
  Speaker 5: What's shaking?
• 28:29
  Speaker 7: No pork on my No, no pork.
• 28:33
  Speaker 18: So first, Envy, I want to say, what's up, Envy?
• 28:36
  Speaker 18: I met you before I was EP on stousands of twenty.
• 28:39
  Speaker 19: Two convent when we did the video down the slate
• 28:42
  Speaker 19: down in the city.
• 28:43
  Speaker 18: Okay, when you was there with H we did the
• 28:45
  Speaker 18: video there. And now to the topic.
• 28:48
  Speaker 6: I do believe that you can be in.
• 28:50
  Speaker 19: H in the marriage and not argue with a woman,
• 28:52
  Speaker 19: right because nowadays, when you say argument, the first time
• 28:55
  Speaker 19: people think about is somebody blowing a gasket. You know,
• 28:57
  Speaker 19: you start arguing, your screaming at each other. But as
• 28:59
  Speaker 19: a difference between argument and having a solid, strong discussions,
• 29:02
  Speaker 19: because I've been with my woman eight years and we
• 29:04
  Speaker 19: don't argue, we just have a real solid in that
• 29:08
  Speaker 19: conversation to kind of get our point across. I think
• 29:10
  Speaker 19: you're canna get your point across that way. I think
• 29:12
  Speaker 19: you don't need to argue with people. So I believe
• 29:14
  Speaker 19: that you can be in the you know, in the marriage,
• 29:16
  Speaker 19: especially while they look like to low keys, you know,
• 29:19
  Speaker 19: down to earth people that you can sit and speak to.
• 29:22
  Speaker 6: Why would it be so hard to believe that?
• 29:24
  Speaker 7: Let me look up what's the definition of argument?
• 29:26
  Speaker 9: Argument?
• 29:27
  Speaker 5: It says, that's what I just did. It says.
• 29:32
  Speaker 20: You got to go into it all the fact that
• 29:34
  Speaker 20: you got to google that to see what it is.
• 29:37
  Speaker 20: It's because when you think of argument, that's exactly what
• 29:39
  Speaker 20: comes up to your head. It's like an argument, like
• 29:42
  Speaker 20: you scream at your bondues that.
• 29:44
  Speaker 7: Out of ten. Well, no, it says.
• 29:45
  Speaker 2: An argument is an exchange of diverging our opposite views,
• 29:48
  Speaker 2: typically a heated or angry one.
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: What Swizzer is saying is that they disagree, but it
• 29:54
  Speaker 1: doesn't get heated, but they don't allow it to get heated.
• 29:56
  Speaker 5: But the argument is back and forth.
• 29:57
  Speaker 3: Like I had an argument with my dad the other day, right,
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: it wasn't We weren't yelling and screaming, but he had
• 30:02
  Speaker 3: a view about something. I had a view about something,
• 30:04
  Speaker 3: and it was heated, but after we laughed it off,
• 30:06
  Speaker 3: he kept the movie.
• 30:07
  Speaker 5: But it was an argument.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: Well, he said, they do disagree, but their communication styles
• 30:11
  Speaker 1: doesn't allow for it to get to level ten.
• 30:14
  Speaker 7: What is level ten?
• 30:15
  Speaker 4: Well, he didn't actually say level ten. I said level ten,
• 30:17
  Speaker 4: But you do know what I'm saying.
• 30:18
  Speaker 7: But I mean, what is level ten?
• 30:19
  Speaker 3: I think it's all.
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: The screaming, the yelling, the cussing, Like he said that
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: their kids have never seen them yell at each other,
• 30:25
  Speaker 1: cuss at each other, those type of things.
• 30:27
  Speaker 2: Oh, no, that ain't that ain't God bless't tell you.
• 30:34
  Speaker 7: I'm not about to tell y'all. No, lie like that.
• 30:36
  Speaker 4: What's the last word you've been called?
• 30:37
  Speaker 7: Envy?
• 30:38
  Speaker 3: No, we don't call each other names now, but you
• 30:41
  Speaker 3: gotta think I think my wife's sixteen. We argue, we've yelled,
• 30:45
  Speaker 3: we screamed like we've been there, you know, I mean
• 30:48
  Speaker 3: it is what it is.
• 30:49
  Speaker 2: Sometimes my kids, sometimes my nine. You wanna tell us
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: to stop yelling at each other, and we both be like,
• 30:53
  Speaker 2: we both said, we're not yelling. We're we're not yelling
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: at each other because we don't be. But you know,
• 30:59
  Speaker 2: I guess, I don't know. I guess any back and
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: forth between parents looks like an argument to kids.
• 31:03
  Speaker 7: I don't know.
• 31:04
  Speaker 3: Eight hundred five eight five one oh five one. We
• 31:06
  Speaker 3: were talking about Swiss Beats and his wife Alicia Key
• 31:09
  Speaker 3: shout to us Swis and Lisha. They said they have
• 31:12
  Speaker 3: never argued after fifteen years of marriage.
• 31:15
  Speaker 5: Let's discuss. It's the Breakfast Club. Good morning, the Breakfast Club.
• 31:21
  Speaker 3: Want to everybody is DJ envy Ess hilarious, Charlamagne the guy.
• 31:25
  Speaker 5: We are the Breakfast Club.
• 31:26
  Speaker 3: Laura La Rosa is here as well, and we got
• 31:28
  Speaker 3: a special guest in the building. Ladies and gentlemen, Mel Robbins, Welcome, Hey.
• 31:33
  Speaker 21: It's good to see you.
• 31:34
  Speaker 7: Are you feeling morning?
• 31:35
  Speaker 21: I feel great? How are you doing?
• 31:37
  Speaker 2: Bles's Black and Holly favorite. This is your first time
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: in this studio. You were here in twenty twenty one
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: when you had a high five theory. Yes, yes, but
• 31:44
  Speaker 2: now millions of books later, number one podcast in the
• 31:47
  Speaker 2: world right now, six year old woman.
• 31:53
  Speaker 7: Man, it really feels like you've truly arrived. What do
• 31:56
  Speaker 7: you what do you? What do you think?
• 31:58
  Speaker 9: You know?
• 31:58
  Speaker 7: The success? What's made all this new?
• 31:59
  Speaker 21: Six Well, you know it's not new success. Like what
• 32:03
  Speaker 21: you're seeing is the result of fifteen years of just boring,
• 32:08
  Speaker 21: grueling daily reps. Like That's what nobody wants to understand,
• 32:13
  Speaker 21: is that you can be successful. You can achieve anything
• 32:16
  Speaker 21: you want. You just have to be patient. You have
• 32:19
  Speaker 21: to get up out of bed every single day and
• 32:21
  Speaker 21: put one foot in front of the other. You got
• 32:23
  Speaker 21: to be willing to do the things you don't feel
• 32:25
  Speaker 21: like doing in the dark when nobody's watching and when
• 32:28
  Speaker 21: you think that it's not going to happen for you.
• 32:30
  Speaker 21: That is what it's about. It's about just consistent, small moves,
• 32:34
  Speaker 21: being patient. I mean, there were so many times where
• 32:36
  Speaker 21: I was just like, am I ever going to get
• 32:38
  Speaker 21: out of it? Why is anyone ever gonna notice? Like,
• 32:41
  Speaker 21: am I ever gonna get invited to the breakfast club?
• 32:44
  Speaker 21: One of the like when is somebody gone to notice
• 32:48
  Speaker 21: your spot that you want it?
• 32:49
  Speaker 5: Well?
• 32:49
  Speaker 21: No, but seriously, like you kind of sit there because
• 32:51
  Speaker 21: I mean, every one of us have had those moments,
• 32:53
  Speaker 21: whether you're putting out music or you're starting a YouTube
• 32:56
  Speaker 21: channel or you started a business, and it's so easy
• 32:59
  Speaker 21: to look around at whatever everybody else is doing and
• 33:01
  Speaker 21: think that you're losing some race in life. The real
• 33:04
  Speaker 21: game is with yourself. Can you keep going? Can you
• 33:08
  Speaker 21: say to yourself? And this is kind of how I
• 33:10
  Speaker 21: would keep myself going in those moments. I would say,
• 33:12
  Speaker 21: I refuse to believe that this is how the story ends.
• 33:16
  Speaker 21: I believe that at some point all of this work
• 33:19
  Speaker 21: is going to pay off. I don't have to know how.
• 33:22
  Speaker 21: I have to believe that it will. And if it
• 33:24
  Speaker 21: hasn't yet, it's not meant to yet. There's some lesson,
• 33:28
  Speaker 21: there's something I'm being held for that I don't know
• 33:32
  Speaker 21: what it is. But if I choose to believe in
• 33:33
  Speaker 21: this moment that things are going to get better, that
• 33:35
  Speaker 21: things are going to turn out for me, that all
• 33:37
  Speaker 21: this hard work is going to pay off, that trying
• 33:39
  Speaker 21: to be a better person is going to pay off,
• 33:41
  Speaker 21: at some point I will look back on my life
• 33:44
  Speaker 21: and say, oh, that's why it didn't happen. Then, Oh,
• 33:46
  Speaker 21: that's why it took longer. Oh that's why either you
• 33:50
  Speaker 21: weren't ready or God the universe was holding you for
• 33:54
  Speaker 21: a different moment. And so, you know, a lot of
• 33:56
  Speaker 21: people ask me what is this moment about. I think
• 33:58
  Speaker 21: it's about fifteen years of ridiculously hard work becoming a
• 34:02
  Speaker 21: better person. I think it's about fifteen years of just
• 34:06
  Speaker 21: chipping away at getting out of debt and doing better
• 34:10
  Speaker 21: in my marriage, and being a better mother and getting
• 34:12
  Speaker 21: control of my emotions and my mental health, chipping away
• 34:15
  Speaker 21: at building a business, and I truly believe that I
• 34:19
  Speaker 21: was being held for this moment like this one thousand
• 34:23
  Speaker 21: percent is my legacy.
• 34:24
  Speaker 5: Well, let me ask you a question.
• 34:25
  Speaker 3: Out you talk about the reps yep for you, it
• 34:27
  Speaker 3: worked out and successful and great. What about that person
• 34:31
  Speaker 3: that is just not good?
• 34:32
  Speaker 7: Right?
• 34:33
  Speaker 5: That rap of that is not good?
• 34:34
  Speaker 3: Like trying that podcast person that is doing the podcast
• 34:38
  Speaker 3: that is just not good and everybody just did good?
• 34:42
  Speaker 5: Good to anybody?
• 34:43
  Speaker 21: Well I don't I see, I don't believe that.
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: But when do you stop because you're a sixty year
• 34:47
  Speaker 3: old rapper like you know?
• 34:48
  Speaker 5: I mean?
• 34:48
  Speaker 21: Or maybe why can't there be a ninety one ninety
• 34:50
  Speaker 21: year old one? See? Maybe what the rapping is for
• 34:54
  Speaker 21: is maybe it's not about rapping. Maybe there is something
• 34:57
  Speaker 21: that you're doing when you are rapping being and nobody's coming,
• 35:01
  Speaker 21: that is teaching you a lesson about patience. Maybe what
• 35:05
  Speaker 21: it's doing is teaching you to believe in yourself when
• 35:09
  Speaker 21: nobody else does. And every time that you show up
• 35:12
  Speaker 21: and nobody's there, every time you post a video on
• 35:15
  Speaker 21: your YouTube channel that only your uncle and your son
• 35:18
  Speaker 21: are subscribed to every time you post, you're basically saying,
• 35:22
  Speaker 21: you know what, screw the world. I believe in myself.
• 35:25
  Speaker 21: I'm doing this for myself and so for me. When
• 35:28
  Speaker 21: you give the example of like the person who's a
• 35:30
  Speaker 21: rappers is terrible, just tell there's lots of people out
• 35:32
  Speaker 21: there doing stuff. They're just terrible. What I love is
• 35:35
  Speaker 21: that they felt called to do something. I don't care
• 35:37
  Speaker 21: if they felt called to do it because they wanted
• 35:40
  Speaker 21: to make more money. I mean how I was working
• 35:42
  Speaker 21: five six jobs back, you know, fifteen years ago when
• 35:45
  Speaker 21: we were eight hundred thousand dollars in debt because I
• 35:47
  Speaker 21: needed groceries on the table, I needed gas in the tank.
• 35:50
  Speaker 21: And so motivation to be safe and to make money
• 35:53
  Speaker 21: or because of your ambition, that's a beautiful thing. But
• 35:56
  Speaker 21: at some point you're going to go, I'm not that
• 35:58
  Speaker 21: good at this, but I believe, and this is what
• 36:01
  Speaker 21: I think is super cool about life. Absolutely every experience
• 36:05
  Speaker 21: that you have in life is leading you somewhere and
• 36:07
  Speaker 21: teaching you something. And I'm gonna one of the reasons
• 36:10
  Speaker 21: why I share so much about what I've learned and
• 36:13
  Speaker 21: the mistakes that I've made. I'm like the villain and
• 36:15
  Speaker 21: every book is because I'm stubborn, Like it takes a
• 36:19
  Speaker 21: sledgehammer from the universe for me to wake the hell
• 36:22
  Speaker 21: up and stop doing something like I literally get so
• 36:25
  Speaker 21: into my groove, whether it's drinking too much or taking
• 36:27
  Speaker 21: my stress out on my kids or being a jealous,
• 36:30
  Speaker 21: insecure friend, that things have to backfire for me to
• 36:34
  Speaker 21: wake up and go, well, yes, I better try something different.
• 36:37
  Speaker 2: Well, I want to just set it up about the book, man,
• 36:40
  Speaker 2: there's some books that I believe are must reads in life.
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: Delecting Theory by mel Robbins has been added to that
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: must read less. My wife got it for me a
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: few weeks ago, and the book is just essentially about
• 36:50
  Speaker 2: how you have to stop wasting your life on things
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: that you can't control.
• 36:53
  Speaker 7: When did you get to that rebelruce?
• 36:55
  Speaker 21: Oh my god, fifty four? I am a slow learner,
• 36:59
  Speaker 21: you know. The funny thing is is I'm married to
• 37:01
  Speaker 21: the chillest dude on the plan. I mean, I'm married
• 37:03
  Speaker 21: to a man who is not only Buddhist, he is
• 37:06
  Speaker 21: a death dula. And like when you want to talk
• 37:09
  Speaker 21: about like a person yeah that can just sit in stillness.
• 37:13
  Speaker 21: I'm like a tornado of emotion and so I've always
• 37:16
  Speaker 21: wanted to let things go. I've always wanted to not
• 37:19
  Speaker 21: care what people think. I've never known how. And see,
• 37:22
  Speaker 21: when you're stressed, or you're easily offended like I used
• 37:26
  Speaker 21: to be, or you have a lot going on, it
• 37:29
  Speaker 21: is very hard to not get wrapped up and what
• 37:33
  Speaker 21: other people are thinking and doing. It's very hard to
• 37:35
  Speaker 21: not let what your kids are going through stress you out.
• 37:38
  Speaker 21: And so you know, I've been trying to do this forever.
• 37:40
  Speaker 21: I mean, this is not a new idea. The serenity
• 37:43
  Speaker 21: prayer is the let Them theory. In fact, you know,
• 37:45
  Speaker 21: I sat down with doctor Martin Luther King the third
• 37:47
  Speaker 21: and his wife and Andrea, and they both said, we
• 37:50
  Speaker 21: write about it in the let Them Theory. They both
• 37:52
  Speaker 21: reflect on the fact that this concept that you have
• 37:55
  Speaker 21: to give up control in order to gain control, that
• 38:00
  Speaker 21: your power is in your response. That this is part
• 38:02
  Speaker 21: of doctor Martin Luther King Junior's legacy, because your response
• 38:08
  Speaker 21: is what dictates who you are. It's not what's happening
• 38:11
  Speaker 21: out there, it's how you respond to it with your
• 38:15
  Speaker 21: thoughts and your actions and how you process your own emotions.
• 38:19
  Speaker 21: And so I did not know this until I was
• 38:21
  Speaker 21: fifty four years old. And you know for me personally
• 38:24
  Speaker 21: the power of these two words, because let them. We've
• 38:27
  Speaker 21: all said let them in our lives a bazillion times.
• 38:30
  Speaker 21: I mean, there's a sermon circulating that's twenty years old,
• 38:34
  Speaker 21: Dad Jakes doing this let them sermons. So this is
• 38:37
  Speaker 21: a concept that has been around since the beginning of time,
• 38:40
  Speaker 21: and that's why this is resonated. I'm not teaching you
• 38:43
  Speaker 21: something new. I'm reminding you of what you already know
• 38:45
  Speaker 21: to be true, and I'm handing you this tool so
• 38:48
  Speaker 21: you can snap out of this crap where we're constantly
• 38:50
  Speaker 21: worked up about what other people are doing to take
• 38:52
  Speaker 21: our power back.
• 38:53
  Speaker 3: We'll still kicking with mel Robbins.
• 38:54
  Speaker 5: Lauren.
• 38:56
  Speaker 1: You talk about managing other people a lot, and I've
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: never heard the term like that, but you use it
• 39:01
  Speaker 1: to basically talk about how we're so what you're talking
• 39:04
  Speaker 1: about me now, we're worried about other people, but also too,
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: I think it's expectations of other people that we're trying
• 39:09
  Speaker 1: to we're making decisions based around that a lot. When
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: did you realize this whole scale of like managing other
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: people and learning when the clock out of that job
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: of trying to do that.
• 39:19
  Speaker 21: Well, So what's going to happen is this, So when
• 39:22
  Speaker 21: you start using the let them theory, and it's so
• 39:24
  Speaker 21: easy to use the next time you're stressed out or
• 39:26
  Speaker 21: annoyed or frustrated, and it's always with other people, just
• 39:29
  Speaker 21: say let them. That's how you use it. Let them,
• 39:31
  Speaker 21: and you're gonna immediately feel peaceful. Your mom's in a
• 39:33
  Speaker 21: bad mood, letter be in a bad mood. Some old
• 39:36
  Speaker 21: friend of yours is talking, let them talk trash. Why
• 39:38
  Speaker 21: you're not allowing it? When you say let them, you
• 39:42
  Speaker 21: are reminding yourself there's one thing in life I can't control.
• 39:46
  Speaker 21: It's what other people say, do, believe, feel, and some
• 39:48
  Speaker 21: of my job to So when you start saying let them,
• 39:51
  Speaker 21: and you detach yourself from the responsibility of having to
• 39:55
  Speaker 21: manage somebody else, something interesting happens. You realize, Oh my god,
• 39:59
  Speaker 21: I've live my life in reserve reverse. I actually live
• 40:02
  Speaker 21: my life giving time and energy trying to manage what
• 40:06
  Speaker 21: other people think. I have kept myself in a major
• 40:09
  Speaker 21: or in a relationship, or in a situation because I'm
• 40:14
  Speaker 21: afraid to disappoint my parents or my friends. I mean,
• 40:17
  Speaker 21: how many people keep drinking or like keep going out
• 40:20
  Speaker 21: at night when what they really want to do is
• 40:22
  Speaker 21: launch a business, and so they don't take the weekends
• 40:25
  Speaker 21: to work on the things that they want to work
• 40:27
  Speaker 21: on because they feel like they don't want to disappoint
• 40:29
  Speaker 21: their friends or people going to talk about them. That's
• 40:31
  Speaker 21: you giving power to other people. Like another way that
• 40:34
  Speaker 21: we give power to other people is we, you know,
• 40:36
  Speaker 21: get so focused on the headlines that we gaslight ourselves
• 40:39
  Speaker 21: into believing that you have no power. It's complete garbage.
• 40:42
  Speaker 21: Of course you have power. And so when you start
• 40:44
  Speaker 21: saying let them, it's sort of this revelation where you're like,
• 40:47
  Speaker 21: oh my god, I spend so much time and energy
• 40:51
  Speaker 21: worrying about other people. I spend so much time and
• 40:54
  Speaker 21: energy letting them stress me out.
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: But is there a level of like when that becomes
• 40:57
  Speaker 1: easier versus harder? Because when you were just talking, and
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: I thought about Michelle Obama in the podcast one of
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: the podcasts she did this week, she was talking about
• 41:04
  Speaker 1: how she realized she was doing a lot for other
• 41:06
  Speaker 1: people not thinking about herself, and she started making decisions
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: for herself. So she's going place she wants to go
• 41:11
  Speaker 1: and do things she like that they don't, and they
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: think she's the worst because of it. But it's like
• 41:16
  Speaker 1: she's Michelle Obama, so it's hard for her to like
• 41:20
  Speaker 1: the noise is so it's it's a lot louder for
• 41:22
  Speaker 1: her well.
• 41:23
  Speaker 21: Of course. But whether or not you pay attention to
• 41:26
  Speaker 21: that is within your control. Whether or not you look
• 41:30
  Speaker 21: at your phone, and we're all guilty of it, whether
• 41:32
  Speaker 21: you are Michelle Obama or you're just going into your
• 41:35
  Speaker 21: middle school, whether or not you give attention to the gossip,
• 41:39
  Speaker 21: you look for, the gossip, you mainline it, that is
• 41:42
  Speaker 21: within your control. If you say, I can never ever
• 41:45
  Speaker 21: ever stop somebody from lying about me, from making up
• 41:48
  Speaker 21: stuff about me, from you know, saying whatever they're going
• 41:51
  Speaker 21: to say, So why on earth would I spend any
• 41:54
  Speaker 21: time and energy managing it? And then you go let
• 41:57
  Speaker 21: me This is the second part of the theory. Whyn't
• 41:59
  Speaker 21: you say let them, let them think negative thoughts, let
• 42:01
  Speaker 21: them make up all kinds of crap, Because if you
• 42:03
  Speaker 21: know you're not getting divorced, what do you care about
• 42:05
  Speaker 21: these idiots saying let me remind myself that I know
• 42:09
  Speaker 21: the truth. And when you know the truth about who
• 42:12
  Speaker 21: you are, you don't think about other people. When you
• 42:15
  Speaker 21: live your life in a way that makes you proud,
• 42:18
  Speaker 21: you don't think about other people.
• 42:20
  Speaker 1: I tell them all you tell me to read her book,
• 42:22
  Speaker 1: and I was, and I already had the book because
• 42:24
  Speaker 1: I think Eddie had given it to us a minute
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, I got the book.
• 42:27
  Speaker 21: And for the while you got it. It will change
• 42:29
  Speaker 21: your Damn. I'm telling you it will change your life
• 42:31
  Speaker 21: because but.
• 42:32
  Speaker 5: You have to get to that stage.
• 42:33
  Speaker 3: Yes, because it's it took me a while to get
• 42:36
  Speaker 3: to that stage.
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: It took a while that he think he was born
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: that way, and so I've never.
• 42:43
  Speaker 7: Truly cared, right.
• 42:44
  Speaker 2: But then even when I started to care, I realized
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: things like the Serenity prayer, a little simple things.
• 42:49
  Speaker 7: That you saw sitting in your grandmother's house.
• 42:50
  Speaker 2: You realize that is absolutely the truth of God, Grammy,
• 42:53
  Speaker 2: the serenity A excepting things I cannot change, courage change
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: the things I can.
• 42:55
  Speaker 7: And withn't no difference.
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: And the easiest way to let go of what you
• 42:58
  Speaker 2: can't control is just realize you've never had control to
• 43:01
  Speaker 2: begin with you.
• 43:02
  Speaker 21: And here's another thing that's really important. That's why you're
• 43:04
  Speaker 21: gonna love it, is that what will start to happen.
• 43:06
  Speaker 21: When you say let them, is it's not that you're
• 43:08
  Speaker 21: allowing people to do bad things. They're already doing bad things.
• 43:12
  Speaker 21: You're recognizing that it's not your job to manage other people,
• 43:15
  Speaker 21: because this is a book that's about power and control
• 43:18
  Speaker 21: and peace. Then you say, let me remind myself how
• 43:22
  Speaker 21: I respond to things. Actually is where my power is.
• 43:26
  Speaker 21: So do I give this any time and energy or not?
• 43:29
  Speaker 21: Do I double down on just living my life in
• 43:32
  Speaker 21: a way that makes me proud of myself, which is
• 43:34
  Speaker 21: where your power is. And the thing that also changed
• 43:37
  Speaker 21: me dramatically is I couldn't believe how much stress I
• 43:43
  Speaker 21: felt and how I was bracing all the time. And
• 43:48
  Speaker 21: when you start to say let them, and you release
• 43:51
  Speaker 21: that kind of obligation to make other people happy or
• 43:55
  Speaker 21: to make everybody know that you're not divorced, or that
• 43:58
  Speaker 21: everything's okay, or like, just let them think whatever they
• 44:01
  Speaker 21: want to think, and live your life in a way
• 44:02
  Speaker 21: that makes you proud. You're going to get all this
• 44:05
  Speaker 21: time and energy back. And what I love about this
• 44:08
  Speaker 21: is when you're less stressed and when you're not bracing
• 44:12
  Speaker 21: all the time because you know your boss is narcissistic,
• 44:15
  Speaker 21: so why on earth would you walk into work assuming
• 44:17
  Speaker 21: that today's going to be anything other than what it
• 44:20
  Speaker 21: already has always been. Let them be who they are.
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: I love the Managing Stress chapter, and in that chapter
• 44:25
  Speaker 2: you say you can't control how other adults behave and
• 44:29
  Speaker 2: stressing about it diminishes your power. You'll never reach the
• 44:32
  Speaker 2: full potential of your life if you continue to allow
• 44:34
  Speaker 2: stupid things to rule, people to drain your life for.
• 44:37
  Speaker 7: Can you yes?
• 44:38
  Speaker 21: Yes, So the two most important resources that you have
• 44:41
  Speaker 21: in life time energy, that's what you got. How you
• 44:44
  Speaker 21: spend your time, where you put your energy, it actually
• 44:47
  Speaker 21: determines your experience of life. And that's why I say,
• 44:50
  Speaker 21: if you have this experience right now where you're exhausted
• 44:53
  Speaker 21: and overwhelmed and nervous, and you're not like feeling like
• 44:57
  Speaker 21: you can ever have time for yourself or your goals
• 44:59
  Speaker 21: just aren't clicking, you're not the problem. The problem is
• 45:02
  Speaker 21: all this time and energy you spend dealing with other people.
• 45:05
  Speaker 21: And so let them is a boundary that you draw
• 45:08
  Speaker 21: where you start to recognize, Okay, I'm going to let
• 45:10
  Speaker 21: other people think and feel and do and have their opinions,
• 45:14
  Speaker 21: and I'm going to let them be disappointed. I'm going
• 45:16
  Speaker 21: to let them misunderstand me, and I'm going to let
• 45:19
  Speaker 21: me really take that time and energy back and pour
• 45:23
  Speaker 21: it into working on myself and staying in my piece.
• 45:27
  Speaker 21: And what I've found is that when I'm less stressed,
• 45:31
  Speaker 21: which i am because I'm not allowing stupid stuff for
• 45:35
  Speaker 21: other people to stress me out, I'm actually a better person.
• 45:39
  Speaker 21: I make more money because I can use my brain
• 45:41
  Speaker 21: instead of being in fight or flight. I don't like
• 45:44
  Speaker 21: vomit on my kids. My emotions. Like I used to
• 45:47
  Speaker 21: be the kind of person that would come in at
• 45:49
  Speaker 21: you know, after work and be yelling at everybody. You're
• 45:51
  Speaker 21: mad at the dog for crying out loud, and then
• 45:53
  Speaker 21: I'd be like, I'm sorry, it's a bad day at work,
• 45:55
  Speaker 21: stressful day at work with the dog.
• 45:56
  Speaker 7: Try bit, you know.
• 45:58
  Speaker 21: They kind of do this and then they come back
• 45:59
  Speaker 21: and really nice because they literally dogs don't like punish
• 46:05
  Speaker 21: you for that. And it's so sad that I used
• 46:08
  Speaker 21: to leave the worst of me for the people I
• 46:11
  Speaker 21: cared about the most and then blame it on the
• 46:14
  Speaker 21: stress of the day. That By the way, when you
• 46:16
  Speaker 21: use the let them theory, you have control over whether
• 46:20
  Speaker 21: or not this stuff gets to you.
• 46:22
  Speaker 9: Let me do it.
• 46:23
  Speaker 5: I have a question.
• 46:23
  Speaker 3: Yeah, in chapter five you say let them think bad
• 46:26
  Speaker 3: thoughts about you, right. The question with that is when
• 46:29
  Speaker 3: a lot of people, sometimes especially on social media, right,
• 46:32
  Speaker 3: nobody facts checks anymore, but that could affect your reputation.
• 46:36
  Speaker 3: That can affect your business, That could affect the way
• 46:38
  Speaker 3: that your kids, teachers look at you, or business that
• 46:42
  Speaker 3: comes round. Of course, what are you doing well?
• 46:44
  Speaker 21: So here this is a very tricky question because you're
• 46:47
  Speaker 21: talking about the PR and the media swirl. PR is
• 46:51
  Speaker 21: a little bit different in personal like, I think it's
• 46:54
  Speaker 21: really important to understand who you are, whether you're dealing
• 46:57
  Speaker 21: with rumors at a middle school, or you're dealing with
• 47:00
  Speaker 21: rumors in your community, or you've got somebody in your
• 47:02
  Speaker 21: family trash talking you. In order to repair your reputation,
• 47:06
  Speaker 21: it is better to show than to tell. In my opinion,
• 47:09
  Speaker 21: you prove the truth based on how you show up
• 47:12
  Speaker 21: in life, not based on the words that come out
• 47:15
  Speaker 21: of your mouth. And if there is somebody spreading things
• 47:18
  Speaker 21: about you, the best way to handle it is to
• 47:20
  Speaker 21: go directly to that person and to ask them about it.
• 47:24
  Speaker 21: Because those kind of people, the people that gossip about
• 47:26
  Speaker 21: you ultimately end up crumbling anyway, because it always catches
• 47:30
  Speaker 21: up with it.
• 47:30
  Speaker 3: We still kicking it with Meil Robbins. A new book,
• 47:34
  Speaker 3: the Let Them Theory, is out right now.
• 47:36
  Speaker 2: Charlamagne, you know you were in the book you talk
• 47:38
  Speaker 2: about how you felt paralyzed by imposter syndrome, especially when
• 47:41
  Speaker 2: you were teaching.
• 47:42
  Speaker 7: Yeah, the five second rule. I wonder what's changed since then?
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: Like, well, gives you the confidence and authority now to
• 47:47
  Speaker 2: feel like you can go out here and teach to
• 47:48
  Speaker 2: let them do?
• 47:49
  Speaker 21: That's a great, great question. So you know how well,
• 47:53
  Speaker 21: First of all, impostor syndrome is deeply misunderstood. So imposter
• 47:57
  Speaker 21: syndrome does not mean that you don't belong in the
• 48:00
  Speaker 21: room you're in. Imposter syndrome means you actually want to
• 48:04
  Speaker 21: be in the room you're in, and there's skills or
• 48:07
  Speaker 21: there's experience that you need to gain in order to
• 48:10
  Speaker 21: dominate in that room. Imposter syndrome is actually not self doubt.
• 48:13
  Speaker 21: It's ambition. And so let me explain that a.
• 48:15
  Speaker 4: Bit, because it's always been said the other way.
• 48:18
  Speaker 21: Yeah, and so if you really think about it, if
• 48:20
  Speaker 21: you walk into a room and you don't feel imposter syndrome.
• 48:23
  Speaker 21: It's because you don't want to be in that room.
• 48:25
  Speaker 21: You don't care what people think about you in that room.
• 48:28
  Speaker 21: If you walk into a room and you feel a
• 48:30
  Speaker 21: sense of imposter syndrome, it's because you care about what
• 48:34
  Speaker 21: people think about you in that room. It means your
• 48:36
  Speaker 21: ambition wants you to succeed in that room.
• 48:38
  Speaker 4: Oh like a push to stay sharp because I'm trying
• 48:41
  Speaker 4: to okay.
• 48:42
  Speaker 21: And also like, hey, I want to actually succeed around
• 48:46
  Speaker 21: people like this, which means what are the skills I
• 48:48
  Speaker 21: need and what I started to understand. And I think
• 48:51
  Speaker 21: it explains a lot about why I am who I
• 48:53
  Speaker 21: am is that we're all the same. Everybody is dealing
• 48:56
  Speaker 21: with the same stuff. Yes, it's easier if you have
• 48:58
  Speaker 21: more money and more recent sources, but at the end
• 49:00
  Speaker 21: of the day, everybody's got a family member that they're
• 49:02
  Speaker 21: worried about. Everybody has ambition they're not tapping into. Everybody
• 49:06
  Speaker 21: has things that they want to pursue in their life,
• 49:09
  Speaker 21: and they're kind of letting themselves down a little bit.
• 49:12
  Speaker 21: Everybody struggles with a little bit of uncertainty and anxiety
• 49:15
  Speaker 21: at times. Everybody has hopes and dreams and feels a
• 49:18
  Speaker 21: little discouraged and overwhelmed. And when you started a baseline
• 49:21
  Speaker 21: that people would love to thrive, and people thrive when
• 49:25
  Speaker 21: they can, and if they can't, I believe it's because
• 49:28
  Speaker 21: they're discouraged or there's some skill building or some experience
• 49:32
  Speaker 21: or you know, some mentorship that's missing.
• 49:34
  Speaker 4: That's it.
• 49:35
  Speaker 21: But that you're built to thrive. And so when you
• 49:37
  Speaker 21: really start at that baseline, like you know, I make
• 49:39
  Speaker 21: it a practice. By the way, this is this is
• 49:41
  Speaker 21: one thing that will change your life when you go
• 49:43
  Speaker 21: into a public bathroom. Two things. I always leave the
• 49:47
  Speaker 21: space better than when I found it.
• 49:49
  Speaker 4: I always public bathrooms.
• 49:52
  Speaker 16: No no, no, literally like.
• 49:54
  Speaker 21: Literally, that's why I don't go into that stall. But okay, no,
• 49:59
  Speaker 21: just I gotta because if somebody like destroy especially women,
• 50:03
  Speaker 21: if somebody destroys the seat, peas all over it and
• 50:06
  Speaker 21: then they leave, that is a human being that is
• 50:09
  Speaker 21: so disconnected from the interconnection of the human experience. You
• 50:14
  Speaker 21: are leaving that for another person, and so making sure
• 50:18
  Speaker 21: that you don't leave your mess for another person, making
• 50:21
  Speaker 21: sure that you just kind of wipe down the counter.
• 50:23
  Speaker 21: And then here's the second thing. If there is a
• 50:24
  Speaker 21: human being cleaning that bathroom, please look in the ai
• 50:27
  Speaker 21: and say thank you all the time. You like that, right,
• 50:31
  Speaker 21: there is a simple thing that will make you start
• 50:36
  Speaker 21: to shake out of that woe is me or that
• 50:38
  Speaker 21: stress or that overwhelm Let them know you appreciate and
• 50:43
  Speaker 21: see what they're doing because it changes who you are.
• 50:46
  Speaker 21: And then you start to see all day long that
• 50:49
  Speaker 21: there are like you know, I can't let you, I'm
• 50:51
  Speaker 21: gonna cry, people are just walking around disconnected and the
• 50:58
  Speaker 21: power of starting to be the one that wakes people up.
• 51:02
  Speaker 21: Hey you know, I always get to know or hey,
• 51:04
  Speaker 21: how is everybody doing? Like it's shocking how we have
• 51:07
  Speaker 21: gotten so far away from that sense of community. And
• 51:11
  Speaker 21: there's actually research around this. They call it either weak ties.
• 51:14
  Speaker 21: I call them warm connections. Those people that you see
• 51:16
  Speaker 21: in the building every day, that you say hello to,
• 51:18
  Speaker 21: the person that's walking the dog that you you know,
• 51:21
  Speaker 21: know the name of the dog in your neighborhood. These
• 51:23
  Speaker 21: relationships matter because they make you feel.
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: Human again when you feel the impact from what you're
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: doing with your book, and to let them theory like
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: you just got emotional, just not even just about your impact,
• 51:34
  Speaker 1: but just talking about just change in the world. How
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: does it make you feel like, do you take a
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: moment just of gratitude and be like, because I saw
• 51:41
  Speaker 1: all the tattoos in the book, and I was like,
• 51:43
  Speaker 1: that's on fire. It's hard to make people like actually
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: believe something that's not tangible.
• 51:47
  Speaker 21: One of the things that you know. For me, I
• 51:50
  Speaker 21: spent so many years like hating myself and feeling like
• 51:56
  Speaker 21: I was a really bad person. And when you get
• 51:59
  Speaker 21: stuck in life, it's easy to think you're the only one.
• 52:02
  Speaker 21: And so I'm just literally on a mission to share
• 52:07
  Speaker 21: whatever I could share and give people access just like
• 52:10
  Speaker 21: you guys, give people access to incredible thinkers and experts
• 52:14
  Speaker 21: and resources. You know, your work is reaching some way
• 52:17
  Speaker 21: halfway around the world that doesn't even have a toilet
• 52:21
  Speaker 21: in their house, And how incredible is that? And if
• 52:25
  Speaker 21: I can save anybody the headaches and the heartaches that
• 52:27
  Speaker 21: I cause myself for the people that I care about,
• 52:29
  Speaker 21: because I didn't know any better, I didn't know what
• 52:31
  Speaker 21: the problem was. I didn't know how to change myself.
• 52:34
  Speaker 21: I didn't know how to push through the emotion that
• 52:36
  Speaker 21: is a life well lived.
• 52:37
  Speaker 4: Why did you hate yourself though? Because you can't do
• 52:39
  Speaker 4: anything about what you don't know.
• 52:40
  Speaker 21: Oh my God, we don't have time. I literally like
• 52:42
  Speaker 21: from the amount of cheating I did when I was little,
• 52:44
  Speaker 21: to the undiagnosed anxiety or the undiagnosed to SLEXI and ADHD,
• 52:50
  Speaker 21: and how that created tremendous anxiety, to the way that
• 52:53
  Speaker 21: childhood trauma impacted me that I didn't even realize was
• 52:56
  Speaker 21: impacting me, Like it's just chronic. I just did not
• 52:59
  Speaker 21: think think I was a bad person. And there's a
• 53:01
  Speaker 21: lot of people walking around that have a hundred times
• 53:05
  Speaker 21: more negative thoughts than they do positive ones. And a
• 53:08
  Speaker 21: lot of people develop a habit of being very self critical.
• 53:12
  Speaker 21: It's never enough, like you're never gonna make it, like
• 53:14
  Speaker 21: you're always so stupid. Why did you do that? Either
• 53:17
  Speaker 21: because that's how they were talked to when they were little,
• 53:19
  Speaker 21: or because it's this like almost protective thing that if
• 53:22
  Speaker 21: you beat yourself up first, you're going to catch it
• 53:24
  Speaker 21: before other people do. And I got to a point,
• 53:27
  Speaker 21: and this is an important thing. The only thing you
• 53:30
  Speaker 21: need to make your life better is one decision. How
• 53:33
  Speaker 21: I'm living my life right now and how it feels
• 53:35
  Speaker 21: no longer works for me. That's all you need to know.
• 53:37
  Speaker 21: If you can have the courage to say that to yourself.
• 53:41
  Speaker 21: You now have tipped the first domino because you've made
• 53:44
  Speaker 21: a decision that you want to change how your life feels.
• 53:46
  Speaker 21: You made a decision that you want to change how
• 53:48
  Speaker 21: it feels up here. And for me as a mom,
• 53:50
  Speaker 21: like your kids absorb the way that you treat yourself.
• 53:54
  Speaker 21: And so having two daughters that I started noticing, my god,
• 53:58
  Speaker 21: why are these beautiful young women picking themself apart? Well
• 54:00
  Speaker 21: because I do. Why are they so hard on it?
• 54:02
  Speaker 21: Because I was so hard on myself That's how they
• 54:04
  Speaker 21: learn it, And so I don't want them to do
• 54:07
  Speaker 21: that to themselves. And you know, the thing I was
• 54:09
  Speaker 21: going to share that's made a huge difference for me
• 54:11
  Speaker 21: is that I keep the impact front and center. And
• 54:14
  Speaker 21: so we send an email out five days a week.
• 54:17
  Speaker 21: There's a person on our team whose job is to
• 54:19
  Speaker 21: assemble all of the things that people are saying all
• 54:23
  Speaker 21: over the world about the books and the podcast, not
• 54:26
  Speaker 21: about mel but about what you learned. And I'll tell
• 54:30
  Speaker 21: you every day there's twenty to thirty of them. And
• 54:33
  Speaker 21: just the other day there was a person who talked
• 54:35
  Speaker 21: about how he was a stepdad and the relationship ended
• 54:40
  Speaker 21: and those step kids were his life and he didn't
• 54:42
  Speaker 21: want to be here anymore. And somebody started to share
• 54:45
  Speaker 21: the podcast with him, and he would go and take
• 54:49
  Speaker 21: a walk every morning and listen to the podcast, and
• 54:51
  Speaker 21: it started to give him a sense of hope. And
• 54:53
  Speaker 21: now he uses the let them theory. This is a
• 54:55
  Speaker 21: person that actually works in like a police operations control center.
• 55:00
  Speaker 21: Never in a million years would I think this is
• 55:02
  Speaker 21: somebody that's listening to the Mel Robins podcast or listening
• 55:05
  Speaker 21: to this kind of conversation. But it goes to prove
• 55:07
  Speaker 21: that everybody wants to do well. Everybody wants to thrive,
• 55:12
  Speaker 21: and you know when you're not doing well. You know
• 55:14
  Speaker 21: when you're not thriving. The problem for most of us
• 55:17
  Speaker 21: is just kind of feeling like I don't think this
• 55:19
  Speaker 21: could change, And the fact is, of course it can change.
• 55:22
  Speaker 21: If you've ever been happy in your life, you can
• 55:24
  Speaker 21: be happy again. If you've ever been proud of yourself,
• 55:27
  Speaker 21: you can be proud of yourself again. If you've ever
• 55:29
  Speaker 21: forgiven somebody else, you can learn to forgive yourself.
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: And you know, also God doesn't call to qualify it.
• 55:33
  Speaker 2: He qualified the called, and you've been called Mail Robin.
• 55:36
  Speaker 21: I feel that I love you man, I love you too.
• 55:38
  Speaker 7: Wow.
• 55:39
  Speaker 9: That's right.
• 55:39
  Speaker 7: Well, we appreciate you for joining us.
• 55:41
  Speaker 21: Thank you.
• 55:42
  Speaker 5: All right. Well it's Mel Robbins. It's the Breakfast Club.
• 55:44
  Speaker 5: Good morning, the Breakfast Club.
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: Yes, dog here today goes to a Medesto, California man
• 56:04
  Speaker 2: named Kristin Alandro Slario Anguiano.
• 56:09
  Speaker 7: I don't think I pronounced any of that right, Okay.
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: That is a name that ICE agents would have at
• 56:12
  Speaker 2: the top of their list, just in case they would
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: monitor a name like that, you know, And honestly, with
• 56:17
  Speaker 2: a name like that, he might get sent to El
• 56:18
  Speaker 2: Salvador because he was arrested for sexual battery, burglary, stalking,
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: and assault with the intent to commit a felony. All
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: those charges will get you deported in Trump's America, especially
• 56:28
  Speaker 2: with a name like that.
• 56:29
  Speaker 7: And it don't even matter if you are an American citizen.
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: Okay, they gonna put you on that deportation flight to
• 56:34
  Speaker 2: El Salvador. Well, what exactly did Christian Alandro Solario Anguiano do.
• 56:39
  Speaker 7: Let's go to CBS News for report. Please got a
• 56:42
  Speaker 7: strange one for you tonight.
• 56:43
  Speaker 22: Adam Modesto, the Staslow Kenny Sheriff says they've arrested a
• 56:46
  Speaker 22: man last week after he allegedly broke into a woman's
• 56:49
  Speaker 22: home at night, then bit and licked her.
• 56:52
  Speaker 5: Toes while she slept.
• 56:55
  Speaker 7: Let's give you some context.
• 56:56
  Speaker 22: The sheriff's officers the man arrested scene here, twenty seven
• 56:58
  Speaker 22: year old Christian Aguiano, have been stalking the woman for months,
• 57:01
  Speaker 22: following her home from work several times, despite a number
• 57:05
  Speaker 22: of people confronting him.
• 57:06
  Speaker 7: Deputy saying just.
• 57:06
  Speaker 22: Wouldn't stop, would even sleep in the car outside her home.
• 57:11
  Speaker 16: Woman is okay on Guiana.
• 57:12
  Speaker 5: Those suspects being.
• 57:13
  Speaker 22: Held on a three hundred and twenty five thousand dollars bail.
• 57:16
  Speaker 2: He broke into her house just so he could treat
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: her feet like a chero cinnamon swirl, full tongue action,
• 57:21
  Speaker 2: sweet sticky, slightly confusing, Okay, l toe lick of supremo,
• 57:25
  Speaker 2: toe sucking king of the dance floor. How you breaking
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: to someone's house which says on for their feet? This
• 57:31
  Speaker 2: man is a telling Nobela villain. Okay, First of all,
• 57:34
  Speaker 2: what's the point of stalking? At what point does a
• 57:36
  Speaker 2: man understand this woman don't want you? And what part
• 57:39
  Speaker 2: of your brain makes you believe that breaking into this
• 57:41
  Speaker 2: woman's house and sexually assaulting her toes was gonna make
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: her like you. Okay, I don't know why I got
• 57:47
  Speaker 2: this far. If this man was following this woman home
• 57:49
  Speaker 2: after her shifts, sleeping in his car outside her residence,
• 57:53
  Speaker 2: checking her doors to see if they are unlocked, the
• 57:55
  Speaker 2: gain entry. If he was doing all of that, he
• 57:57
  Speaker 2: should have been on ICE's radar along long time ago. Okay,
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: somebody should have been put him in handcuffs. This man
• 58:03
  Speaker 2: was confronted by her co workers to leave her alone,
• 58:05
  Speaker 2: but none of that stopped him.
• 58:07
  Speaker 7: Okay.
• 58:07
  Speaker 2: The lesson to be learned here is that this incident
• 58:10
  Speaker 2: underscores the importance of taking stalking behaviors seriously, and we
• 58:14
  Speaker 2: got to implement stronger protective measures for victims. And by
• 58:18
  Speaker 2: stronger measures, we got to let people get they ass kicked. Okay,
• 58:22
  Speaker 2: that's what I mean by stronger measures. There have to
• 58:24
  Speaker 2: be some sort of community policing that can happen the
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: same way it's citizens arrest. We have to make it
• 58:30
  Speaker 2: okay in certain situations for citizens to put their foot
• 58:33
  Speaker 2: up other citizens' assets.
• 58:35
  Speaker 7: Okay. Co workers went to him and told him to
• 58:37
  Speaker 7: cut it out.
• 58:38
  Speaker 2: He was sleeping outside that woman's home he was checking
• 58:41
  Speaker 2: for unlocked doors and her residence.
• 58:43
  Speaker 7: All of that should equate to a community jumping. Okay,
• 58:46
  Speaker 7: now that's too extreme for folks. Then we got to
• 58:48
  Speaker 7: enhance legal protections, all right.
• 58:50
  Speaker 2: You gotta have strong laws against stalking and ensure swift
• 58:52
  Speaker 2: actions when victims report their being stocked. You gotta use
• 58:56
  Speaker 2: stories like this to increase public awareness. We have to
• 58:59
  Speaker 2: educate the public about the signs of stalking and the
• 59:02
  Speaker 2: importance of reporting suspicious activities. And most importantly, we got
• 59:06
  Speaker 2: to support the victims. Okay, provide resources and support systems
• 59:10
  Speaker 2: for people who feel threatened. You can't wait until somebody
• 59:14
  Speaker 2: breaks into somebody's house and turns their toes into.
• 59:17
  Speaker 7: To Molly's to care.
• 59:18
  Speaker 2: Okay, So please give Christian Anguiano the sweet sounds of
• 59:22
  Speaker 2: the Hamiltons.
• 59:23
  Speaker 15: You are, Oh the day, oh the day.
• 59:38
  Speaker 3: Ye all right, well, thank you for that Donkey of
• 59:44
  Speaker 3: the day.
• 59:45
  Speaker 5: Ye the Breakfast Club.
• 59:50
  Speaker 11: Morning.
• 59:50
  Speaker 3: Everybody is dj NV just Hilarie Charlamagne to God, we
• 59:54
  Speaker 3: are the Breakfast Club. We got a special guest in
• 59:57
  Speaker 3: the building, the icon living Dawn Stanley.
• 59:59
  Speaker 16: Welcome back, how you, thank you, thank you, thank y'all.
• 1:00:02
  Speaker 13: Usually come back when we win the championship we lost
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 13: this year, So thank y'all for you.
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 5: You're always invited.
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 3: Uncommon favorite is out right now. Basketball in North Philly,
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 3: My Mother and the Life Lessons I learned from all three.
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 5: It's out right now. How are you feeling.
• 1:00:19
  Speaker 16: I'm feeling great.
• 1:00:20
  Speaker 13: I mean, my friends have received their books and they
• 1:00:23
  Speaker 13: have nothing but like great things like my cup running over.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 5: Yeah it did.
• 1:00:28
  Speaker 13: I gotta I gotta give you a shout out. And
• 1:00:31
  Speaker 13: you sparked the conversation. So many people have asked me
• 1:00:34
  Speaker 13: to write a book, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 1:00:36
  Speaker 13: like yeah right, but it.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 16: Came from so many different people.
• 1:00:39
  Speaker 13: And then when I came on the show in twenty
• 1:00:42
  Speaker 13: twenty two, we we talked about it and you just
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 13: you kept the conversation going.
• 1:00:46
  Speaker 16: You're real persistent with it.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 9: You know.
• 1:00:48
  Speaker 13: That's That's what I'm attracted to most. It's like somebody that.
• 1:00:52
  Speaker 7: Actually is it persistent yet.
• 1:00:53
  Speaker 13: Persistent and know the process, like you knew the process.
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 13: I don't know if you knew my story so so
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 13: to speak, but you knew enough to know that you.
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 16: Know this, this book will be received well. And I
• 1:01:06
  Speaker 16: appreciate that well.
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 7: People like you don't come around too often.
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: Don like you're a once in a generational just person,
• 1:01:12
  Speaker 2: you know, and you really learned that when you read
• 1:01:14
  Speaker 2: the book, not even just as a coach, but as
• 1:01:16
  Speaker 2: a basketball player, but more so as a child of Philadelphia.
• 1:01:19
  Speaker 13: Man, I mean I had fun, Like the process was fun.
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 13: It's liberating. It is you know, you don't really know
• 1:01:27
  Speaker 13: how you're going to be received, but every person like
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 13: I'm actually waiting for a critic, like somebody saying what
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 13: didn't go right in the book, and then we have
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 13: yet to get to that point. And one of my
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 13: friends was, you know, listening, had a long road trip,
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 13: listened to the entire book yesterday and she was like,
• 1:01:46
  Speaker 13: I'm in tears.
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 16: I'm laughing.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 13: I get it, like the leadership part of it, Like
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 13: I mean, the emotions that are in the book, and
• 1:01:54
  Speaker 13: it's me.
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 16: So some of it is emotional me.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 13: Some of it is just I'm able to just get
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 13: it out because I remembered most of it and I
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 13: had to call on my siblings and kind of fill
• 1:02:05
  Speaker 13: in the gaps. But it's me, Like it's so me,
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 13: it's so relatable, it's so it was an easy process.
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 16: So was the therapeutic at all to do it.
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 13: No, it was just natural. It wasn't like it was natural.
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 13: And I think sharing my story is just relatable to people.
• 1:02:23
  Speaker 13: It's not like, you know, I don't think it's an
• 1:02:26
  Speaker 13: overdo it with the accolades. It's like the accolades are
• 1:02:29
  Speaker 13: intertwined and everybody's accolades won't be like Olympian and actual champions,
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 13: but on a certain level, like if you graduate high
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 13: school it's relatable, if you graduate college, it's relatable. If
• 1:02:41
  Speaker 13: you can pull yourself out of the projects of any city,
• 1:02:45
  Speaker 13: it's relatable.
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 16: And there's no wrong path, like.
• 1:02:49
  Speaker 13: There's no like you can get off tilted, but then
• 1:02:52
  Speaker 13: you got to come back by like habits, come back by.
• 1:02:57
  Speaker 13: The lessons in the book are just just it really
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 13: relates to every single thing that you would want to
• 1:03:02
  Speaker 13: accomplish in life. And I'm not just saying that the
• 1:03:04
  Speaker 13: pump the book, but it really is like I'm only
• 1:03:06
  Speaker 13: giving what other people are giving me, the feedback they're
• 1:03:09
  Speaker 13: giving me, and it's cool to hear people just relate
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 13: to the book.
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 3: Yes, I love it because you know, people know you
• 1:03:16
  Speaker 3: from different things, right, Some people know you as a player,
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 3: some people know you as a coach. But with this book,
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 3: it starts from where you came from, which is North Philly, right,
• 1:03:23
  Speaker 3: And you talk abound and rosenhousing projects, and you talk
• 1:03:26
  Speaker 3: about you know, you said growing up in the projects
• 1:03:29
  Speaker 3: was the best decision your parents made. Explain that a
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 3: little bit and how that formed to the woman that
• 1:03:33
  Speaker 3: you are today.
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 13: Just imagine the people that don't grow up in the projects.
• 1:03:37
  Speaker 16: What you think happens in the projects.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 13: You think probably only one thing, crime like bad things
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 13: like And for me, it was the foundation of giving
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 13: me the scars I needed, the.
• 1:03:49
  Speaker 16: Chinks and the armor I needed to succeed.
• 1:03:52
  Speaker 13: Like there was unity in the projects, There was discipline
• 1:03:56
  Speaker 13: in the projects. There was manicure lawns. It was my
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 13: block I grew up, never had trash in it, like,
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 13: it was captain in a way that would compete with
• 1:04:07
  Speaker 13: any suburban lawn like on neighborhood. So it was all
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 13: those things that helped build you up, like I'm unbothered
• 1:04:16
  Speaker 13: and unafraid to tackle on the most challenging things in
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 13: life because that's nothing compared to what that's nothing like.
• 1:04:25
  Speaker 13: So I think it gave me the foundation I needed
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 13: to just be able to coach every day like coach
• 1:04:31
  Speaker 13: young people, like generations are changing. Coaching talent and individuals
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 13: and young people nowadays, it's very, very challenging.
• 1:04:39
  Speaker 7: I love how you embrace your in a child. That's
• 1:04:41
  Speaker 7: what I love this picture on the past.
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 2: What's the moment from your childhood that still shapes how
• 1:04:45
  Speaker 2: you like handle pressure to day.
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 13: You know, there's a story that I that I share
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 13: in the book about my father, who I mean, I'm
• 1:04:52
  Speaker 13: over fifty now, right, but when he I don't know
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 13: if I was twelve fourteen, maybe I got invited to
• 1:05:00
  Speaker 13: play on this team in this competition outside of Philly,
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 13: Like it was a road trip, and my father was like, no,
• 1:05:07
  Speaker 13: you can't go.
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 16: Like that hurt me, Like it really hurt me.
• 1:05:10
  Speaker 13: And I remembered it so vividly that for him to
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 13: deny me that because it was one of the first times.
• 1:05:16
  Speaker 13: But I'm thirteen, fourteen years old, whose parents are gonna
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 13: let them somebody else take their child out of state?
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 13: Like I wasn't thinking about that. I was solely thinking
• 1:05:25
  Speaker 13: about basketball. But it was one of the one of
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 13: the experiences that drove.
• 1:05:30
  Speaker 16: Me like I didn't like my father for that, Like.
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 13: I didn't like him for the decision, parental decision that
• 1:05:37
  Speaker 13: he made. But as I'm older now and reflecting on
• 1:05:41
  Speaker 13: and writing the book, it is I need conflict. I
• 1:05:44
  Speaker 13: know that about myself that I need conflict, Like everything
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 13: can't be comfortable. Like if I have you know, ten
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 13: people supporting me, you know here, I need about ten
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 13: to twelve people that hated like I need it. I
• 1:05:57
  Speaker 13: mean it helps me. It drives me, like it drives me.
• 1:06:01
  Speaker 16: While you said, I don't have a critic yet, I'm
• 1:06:03
  Speaker 16: waiting for the book right.
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 13: Now, right, So it's that is the ability. Like you know,
• 1:06:09
  Speaker 13: we lost the Yukon this year, Like you know, the
• 1:06:12
  Speaker 13: critics are saying I can't coach.
• 1:06:17
  Speaker 16: That's what they say.
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 13: But I'm like, okay, well but but but again, everything
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 13: that I've needed in my life, you know, failure success
• 1:06:24
  Speaker 13: happens to me. It's uncommon. Like, but I know are
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 13: loss this year will somehow help us?
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 16: It will.
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 13: I'm not just relying on it helping us. I'm gonna
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 13: put action to it, so it means something.
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 7: I love them.
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 2: You said that in a post game conference. You was like,
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 2: I hope that they're crying. I hope that my players
• 1:06:45
  Speaker 2: are crying. I hope that it hurts, that'll make them
• 1:06:47
  Speaker 2: be better next.
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 13: Yeah, I mean the most growth takes place when you're uncomfortable,
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 13: the most if you're.
• 1:06:54
  Speaker 16: Comfortable all the time.
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 13: And I've said this as well, like parents really don't
• 1:06:59
  Speaker 13: want their kids to feel what they felt like pain,
• 1:07:03
  Speaker 13: and I'm like, I want them to feel a little pain.
• 1:07:05
  Speaker 16: I want them to hurt.
• 1:07:06
  Speaker 13: I want them to be uncomfortable, and I love them
• 1:07:08
  Speaker 13: enough to allow them to sit in that space because
• 1:07:11
  Speaker 13: not for long, but they need to fight their way
• 1:07:14
  Speaker 13: out of it, because nothing's going to be given to me.
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 16: I don't like that place.
• 1:07:18
  Speaker 13: I don't like to feel that, so I fight like
• 1:07:21
  Speaker 13: hell to try to not feel that, by reppering, by
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 13: doing everything I need to do to not feel that.
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 13: It's almost like when you grow up in the projects
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 13: and you grow up in poverty, you don't want that anymore,
• 1:07:32
  Speaker 13: Like you don't want that. Once you've lived and you've
• 1:07:35
  Speaker 13: you know you've earned a certain keep. You want to
• 1:07:38
  Speaker 13: keep that because you want to change generations and your family,
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 13: and I hope I'm able to do that.
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 3: We're still kicking it with dog Stalley Charlaman.
• 1:07:47
  Speaker 2: You seem like you've always been a natural born leader,
• 1:07:51
  Speaker 2: like throughout your whole life, even when you were the child.
• 1:07:53
  Speaker 2: So it made me wonder if if coaching never entered
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 2: your life, where do you think your leadership would have
• 1:07:57
  Speaker 2: shown up instead?
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 9: Oh?
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 13: Man, that's a hard question. Like I'm competitive. I probably
• 1:08:02
  Speaker 13: would have been a losing gambler. I try, like trying,
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 13: like I don't know.
• 1:08:10
  Speaker 16: I mean, I do.
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 13: I love kids, so my work would have been with kids.
• 1:08:15
  Speaker 13: And I'm glad that coaching found me. Like I'm glad
• 1:08:19
  Speaker 13: somebody saw something in me that I didn't see it myself.
• 1:08:22
  Speaker 13: I didn't see coaching. I didn't want to coach at all.
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 13: And I don't know why, because I had great coaches.
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 13: I had great people in my life that challenged me,
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 13: that were good at it. But when I when I
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 13: had coaching friends, the only thing they talked about were
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 13: their teams in basketball. And I'm like, you know, just
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 13: what I do every day? I do this every day.
• 1:08:41
  Speaker 13: Why would I want to talk about it every day?
• 1:08:43
  Speaker 13: Why would I want my life consume with it? And
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 13: here I am, twenty five years later, like loving it,
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 13: like it's I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 13: And when you when you're able to live out your passion.
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 13: It's the most beautiful, liberating and incredible experience. Like I
• 1:08:59
  Speaker 13: know my players really get something out of our relationship.
• 1:09:03
  Speaker 16: They do.
• 1:09:04
  Speaker 13: They get they build character, they navigate life. But for me,
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 13: it's I'm overjoyed when they graduate. I'm overjoyed on draft night.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 13: I'm overjoyed when they're able to see their hard work
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 13: produce what they wanted. Like even if they don't make
• 1:09:19
  Speaker 13: it to the league, they're equipped with being successful with anything.
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 13: Like seriously, that does something to my heart when young
• 1:09:27
  Speaker 13: people were able to get what they're supposed to be.
• 1:09:29
  Speaker 2: You know, you talked about your players, You got a
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 2: lot of success stories from your time coaching at the
• 1:09:32
  Speaker 2: University of South Carolina. But in the book, you make
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 2: it no secret that Asia Wish is your favorite.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 13: Well, I mean, I mean, here's why, And I don't
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 13: I've coached a lot of great players, Like Asia was
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 13: the very first player that was the number one play
• 1:09:46
  Speaker 13: in the country to decide she wanted to come play
• 1:09:49
  Speaker 13: for us, and I know it's in her backyard.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 16: And we didn't.
• 1:09:52
  Speaker 13: We didn't look like a national championship team, Like we
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 13: never won a national we had never been to the
• 1:09:58
  Speaker 13: final four, so for her to trust us with that
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 13: part of her career meant that she believed in us.
• 1:10:05
  Speaker 13: She trusted us, she knew that we were gonna get
• 1:10:09
  Speaker 13: her to where she needed to go as far as
• 1:10:12
  Speaker 13: still being the number one draft pick like four years later,
• 1:10:16
  Speaker 13: like when someone and it wasn't just her, it was
• 1:10:19
  Speaker 13: her entire family believed in it. And it took some
• 1:10:23
  Speaker 13: at times them thinking did we make the right decision?
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 16: Because she did.
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 13: She started her first game and then she was terrible,
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 13: like scrub like.
• 1:10:34
  Speaker 16: Right, scrub like scrub like.
• 1:10:38
  Speaker 13: So I was like, I gotta gotta take you out
• 1:10:40
  Speaker 13: of starting lineup. But I ain't even taught her that.
• 1:10:43
  Speaker 13: I told her parents first, and her mom even was
• 1:10:47
  Speaker 13: like you sure, like you're gonna have to trust me
• 1:10:50
  Speaker 13: on this one, Like you're just gonna have to trust me,
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 13: And she was like all right. But at the end
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 13: of her freshman year, she was National Rookie of the Year,
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 13: she was first team All SEC, she was Rookie of
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 13: the Year in the SEC. Like she got all the
• 1:11:03
  Speaker 13: accolades coming off the bench. And when someone as a
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 13: coach and leader and mentored young people believe in you
• 1:11:12
  Speaker 13: like they really do, when that's reciprocating because I believe
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 13: that I knew that she was going to be the
• 1:11:18
  Speaker 13: one that takes us to that next level when you're
• 1:11:20
  Speaker 13: able to have the same synergy.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 16: You know, Asia was hell to deal with, right.
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 13: Because she's young, Like she with the private school for
• 1:11:30
  Speaker 13: like twelve years.
• 1:11:31
  Speaker 16: All of her schooling was a private school, so.
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 13: She needed to be roughened up a little bit to
• 1:11:37
  Speaker 13: get her ready for what she faced. Like she faces
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 13: the critics right now, but I know she can handle
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 13: them because we took her through all of that. Like
• 1:11:45
  Speaker 13: she had dyslexia right throughout her college career, and I'm like, okay,
• 1:11:50
  Speaker 13: you're going to read in front of the team every
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 13: time we have a game because we have a like
• 1:11:54
  Speaker 13: a scripture reading and an inspirational reading before every pregame
• 1:11:59
  Speaker 13: meal and there's somebody that has to read it. So
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 13: I was like, you're gonna read that. It took her
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 13: her senior year. Couldn't do it the first second, the
• 1:12:07
  Speaker 13: third her senior year, she read out loud, and she
• 1:12:10
  Speaker 13: had fun with it. She said, y'all, this is along
• 1:12:12
  Speaker 13: with y'all gonna have to bear with me, Like it
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 13: was that kind of liberation. So when she gave her
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 13: entire self to me, the good, the bad, the ugly
• 1:12:22
  Speaker 13: entire You know, that's why I just have a really
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 13: strong relationship with her, Like she could tell me anything,
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 13: Like I'm non judgmental, Like young people won't want to
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 13: tell you everything because they think you're gonna judge them.
• 1:12:36
  Speaker 16: I don't judge. Like, there's nothing that any one of
• 1:12:39
  Speaker 16: my current former.
• 1:12:40
  Speaker 13: Future players can tell me that that's gonna rock me
• 1:12:43
  Speaker 13: that I haven't seen, like everybody's been through. Like there's
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 13: no new problems. It's the same old, recycled problems. So
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 13: just give it here so you're not dealing with it
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 13: longer than you need to.
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 7: You know, it's interesting, Recular, I was watching you.
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: You did Good Morning in America, if you Kobe all
• 1:12:57
  Speaker 2: of that stuff like that, So you was working, but
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 2: I still know he still the coach at the University
• 1:13:01
  Speaker 2: of South Carolina. But I was like, oh, you know what,
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 2: she'll be fine because she used to play ball and
• 1:13:06
  Speaker 2: coach at the same time, which I found out about
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 2: in the book.
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 7: That was insane.
• 1:13:10
  Speaker 16: Six years. That's crazy six years.
• 1:13:13
  Speaker 13: I mean when I when I got into coaching, I
• 1:13:15
  Speaker 13: was like in my prime, So you know, the ad
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 13: at the time. He kept asking me like he was persistent,
• 1:13:22
  Speaker 13: like I'm like, no, no, I'm not interested.
• 1:13:25
  Speaker 16: I'm playing in the WNBA and this is and then
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 16: he just kept asking.
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 13: And then then I ended up having to go meet
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 13: with him because the final four was in Philly.
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 16: I'm from Philly. He knew I was going to be there.
• 1:13:35
  Speaker 13: So I went and sat down with him and he
• 1:13:38
  Speaker 13: asked me two questions.
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 16: He was like, can you lead did you do your research?
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 13: Like did you like and I was like, yeah, I
• 1:13:45
  Speaker 13: basically was the captain on every team that I played on, right,
• 1:13:48
  Speaker 13: And then he was like, can you turn Temple women's
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 13: basketball program around? And I was like, oh, is that
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 13: a challenge? Like is that really a challenge? Because I'm
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 13: drawing the challenges And I never answered the question. I
• 1:13:59
  Speaker 13: only I think I answered the question. He was like, hey,
• 1:14:01
  Speaker 13: can you just come down the hall and meet some people?
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 16: So I was like, okay, I'm here.
• 1:14:06
  Speaker 13: He took me in this conference room, set me at
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 13: the head of the table and they were like ten
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 13: to twelve people sitting around this table and they're asking
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 13: me questions like what do you see yourself in five years?
• 1:14:16
  Speaker 13: I'm like playing in the WNBA and they were like,
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 13: do you have to see yourself coaching?
• 1:14:21
  Speaker 16: And I was like no, Like y'all they were interviewing me.
• 1:14:24
  Speaker 13: I was on a job interview and I didn't know
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 13: it because all my job interviews were tryouts like basketball
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 13: like physical tryouts. Needless to say, I took the job
• 1:14:34
  Speaker 13: two weeks later. They just agreed to allow me to
• 1:14:37
  Speaker 13: continue to play and coach. So I was in like
• 1:14:41
  Speaker 13: basketball utopia because I was coaching and I'm actually still
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 13: able to express myself on the court because I wasn't
• 1:14:49
  Speaker 13: ready to hang up my shoes. I was still very
• 1:14:52
  Speaker 13: much a player, and I think that allowed me to
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 13: play a little bit longer than I wanted to, and
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 13: that allowed me to he staying fresh with what was
• 1:15:02
  Speaker 13: up with teaching young people because they were more enthralled
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 13: with me playing because that's what they wanted, like I
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 13: was living their dream right before their very eyes. And
• 1:15:14
  Speaker 13: I think it just helped me be a better coach,
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 13: be a more understanding coach because I was a player
• 1:15:21
  Speaker 13: receiving the information from a coach, and then I just
• 1:15:25
  Speaker 13: helped the dynamics of what I was doing.
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 3: We was still kicking it with Dawn Stalley. Her new book,
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 3: Uncommon Favorite is out right now. Basketball in North Philly,
• 1:15:33
  Speaker 3: My Mother, and the life Lessons I learned from all three. Now,
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 3: I wanted to ask about your father, right. You mentioned
• 1:15:38
  Speaker 3: your father earlier and you said your relationship wasn't that great?
• 1:15:41
  Speaker 5: What you said it got better over the years.
• 1:15:43
  Speaker 3: Do you understand some of the things that your father
• 1:15:45
  Speaker 3: was trying to implementing you as a young girl, because
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 3: they said that your father looked at women's basketball and
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 3: felt that wasn't too many opportunities and didn't know if
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 3: you could sustain at that time. And do you wish
• 1:15:55
  Speaker 3: that you kind of put yourself in his mentality back
• 1:15:58
  Speaker 3: then as a child, because even with the name of
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 3: the book, it says Basketball North Philly, my Mother, but
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 3: not father.
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 13: No, no, no, you know, I think I think even
• 1:16:12
  Speaker 13: the one like family members that are that are closest
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 13: to you, Yes, I thought, I, Yes, I should have
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 13: had a much more mature outlook on that relationship now
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 13: that you can reflect on it, now that you can
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 13: see because I held that and I you know if
• 1:16:29
  Speaker 13: you can hear that, I still hold that instance. But
• 1:16:32
  Speaker 13: when you when you're coaching, right, you come into a
• 1:16:36
  Speaker 13: situation where you hurt a player like you heard that
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 13: player that was like probably twelve years ago. I heard
• 1:16:42
  Speaker 13: that player like it. It drives me to not hurt
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 13: other players. And I wasn't mature enough or savvy enough
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 13: to handle that at twelve or thirteen. So I do
• 1:16:52
  Speaker 13: think it's it's helped me be a better coach. It
• 1:16:55
  Speaker 13: helps me be a better person to really like again,
• 1:16:59
  Speaker 13: I did and talk about things I held that for
• 1:17:01
  Speaker 13: My father probably didn't, probably doesn't. He's been dead and
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 13: gone since two thousand and one.
• 1:17:08
  Speaker 16: Like I don't even think he really knew how much
• 1:17:11
  Speaker 16: that hurt me.
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 13: But also use that to navigate the nose like I
• 1:17:17
  Speaker 13: handle those a lot better because of that.
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 7: I love to respect the power of habits chapter.
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 2: And in that chapter, you speak extremely highly of South
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 2: Carolina's own Malaysia for a while, and you even refer
• 1:17:30
  Speaker 2: to her as a younger, savvier version of you. You say,
• 1:17:33
  Speaker 2: this is a quote I heard from so many adults
• 1:17:34
  Speaker 2: who gave their own parents hell, only to see that
• 1:17:37
  Speaker 2: teenagers return to favor. Now it's my turn in the battle.
• 1:17:40
  Speaker 2: So when I see you had when I read that,
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 2: and I was like, she had so much love for Malaysia.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 2: What was your initial reaction when she decided to enter
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 2: the portal and.
• 1:17:48
  Speaker 7: Was it surprising to you?
• 1:17:50
  Speaker 16: Surprising?
• 1:17:51
  Speaker 13: No, I think you know, being in this space, you
• 1:17:54
  Speaker 13: become to expect the unexpected, right. I still have much
• 1:17:58
  Speaker 13: love for Malaysia, much love, like I want her happy.
• 1:18:01
  Speaker 13: She and a mom came in. She said, I think
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 13: I'm want to get into the transfer portal. So I'm like, okay,
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 13: well you think or you know? And she said I know,
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 13: And I said, well, only want you happy, like I
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 13: really do. Only want our players happy, whether that's with
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 13: us or somewhere else.
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 16: Just be happy. I told her, don't look back.
• 1:18:19
  Speaker 13: I know it's probably gonna be hard to not look
• 1:18:22
  Speaker 13: back to see you know, you leaving your hometown and
• 1:18:25
  Speaker 13: all that. I said, don't look back like you made
• 1:18:27
  Speaker 13: this decision. Just go forward with it and don't look back.
• 1:18:32
  Speaker 13: You're always gonna be a game cock, You're always gonna
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 13: be welcomed here. I wish her the best. And when
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 13: I say that, people probably think, oh, but I do,
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 13: like I really do, like, cause I am what's for
• 1:18:44
  Speaker 13: us is for us, not it was not. Let's keep moving.
• 1:18:48
  Speaker 13: I don't stay in despair. I don't stay in those
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 13: spaces for very long. I'm like, Okay, we got to
• 1:18:54
  Speaker 13: get recruiting. We gotta get back into this portal to
• 1:18:56
  Speaker 13: see who we can get to help us. I think
• 1:18:58
  Speaker 13: she's gonna have a promising career. I do think she's
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 13: a generational talent that will never leave. Like, she does
• 1:19:05
  Speaker 13: things on the basketball court that I've never seen a
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 13: woman do, and she's She'll continue to do that and
• 1:19:11
  Speaker 13: will continue to be happy for her except the one
• 1:19:15
  Speaker 13: or two times that we have to play them like
• 1:19:17
  Speaker 13: it's on, like it's this.
• 1:19:19
  Speaker 16: She's gonna be super competitive against us.
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 13: We're gonna we're gonna want to win, and it's gonna
• 1:19:23
  Speaker 13: be a pride thing that comes with just being a competitor.
• 1:19:27
  Speaker 16: And we got much love for her and the family.
• 1:19:29
  Speaker 3: Now this this has nothing to do with the boat,
• 1:19:31
  Speaker 3: but I wanted to ask us were talking about players.
• 1:19:33
  Speaker 3: You know, the w NBA has has taken a huge
• 1:19:35
  Speaker 3: jump in the last couple of years, and I love it.
• 1:19:37
  Speaker 3: My daughters love it, my sons love it. What do
• 1:19:39
  Speaker 3: you think what's going on in the WNBA with it?
• 1:19:41
  Speaker 3: It seems like they're pitting, you know, Caitlin Clark against
• 1:19:44
  Speaker 3: Angel reaes right, kind of what they did in the
• 1:19:47
  Speaker 3: NBA back in the day. But it was more teams, right,
• 1:19:49
  Speaker 3: I guess not maybe not teams. It was Magic Bird.
• 1:19:51
  Speaker 3: This one is that one, but this one it just
• 1:19:53
  Speaker 3: seems like it seems very personal. So what are your thoughts,
• 1:19:55
  Speaker 3: like even the other day with that foul, and they
• 1:19:57
  Speaker 3: called it a flagrant foul. I don't necessarily we agree,
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 3: but what are your.
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 9: Thoughts on it?
• 1:20:01
  Speaker 17: Well?
• 1:20:02
  Speaker 16: I think the officiating has a hard job.
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 13: That's one the decipher whether or not that's a flavored
• 1:20:07
  Speaker 13: one or not. Hard job, and I do think they
• 1:20:10
  Speaker 13: understand the dynamics of Angel and Caitlyn.
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 16: I do.
• 1:20:14
  Speaker 13: I think it's great for our game because it's like
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 13: but yeah, like it's a sport.
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 16: Treat us like a sport.
• 1:20:20
  Speaker 13: Don't treat us anything other than being a sport. It
• 1:20:23
  Speaker 13: happens in every sport, Soccer, basketball, football, it happens in
• 1:20:27
  Speaker 13: every sport.
• 1:20:28
  Speaker 16: So let it be.
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 13: I'm gonna I'm gonna take the lead of Angel and Caitlin,
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 13: and that lead is they said it was a it
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 13: was a file. The officials got it right. We're moving on,
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 13: That's what I'm saying. I'm gonna take their lead. Okay,
• 1:20:42
  Speaker 13: I think it's it pulls people in. I do think
• 1:20:45
  Speaker 13: there are new fans that haven't watched our game and
• 1:20:49
  Speaker 13: they really don't know, so they only they're only singlely
• 1:20:52
  Speaker 13: focused on Kate one, right, right, So when you're that
• 1:20:56
  Speaker 13: and that's that's their idol, that's who attracts them. But
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 13: I just hope that they'll open their eyes to the
• 1:21:04
  Speaker 13: rest of the talent that is there. Like the product.
• 1:21:08
  Speaker 13: The product is incredible and it's in high demand. We
• 1:21:13
  Speaker 13: played Caitlin in the National Championship last year, right, twenty
• 1:21:17
  Speaker 13: million a topped off at whatever it topped off at
• 1:21:20
  Speaker 13: the most. I know they saw us, like, I know
• 1:21:23
  Speaker 13: they saw us. I know they saw us have an
• 1:21:25
  Speaker 13: undefeated season. I know they saw Camilla Cardozo. I know
• 1:21:29
  Speaker 13: they saw Ashlon Watause. I know they saw Tessa Johnson
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 13: have an incredible care career or day. I know they
• 1:21:35
  Speaker 13: saw my Lasier do some incredible things like so, so
• 1:21:39
  Speaker 13: open your eyes up to seeing outside of Caitlin, well
• 1:21:42
  Speaker 13: not even outside included, because she's a part of a
• 1:21:45
  Speaker 13: part of it all.
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 16: So you know, I'm.
• 1:21:48
  Speaker 13: Looking forward to the next time they play too. I'm
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 13: gonna be glueden just like everybody else.
• 1:21:52
  Speaker 2: Yes, I want to go back to that that chapter
• 1:21:55
  Speaker 2: of respect the power of habits.
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 7: Right when you talk about Malaysia, it is with such reference.
• 1:21:59
  Speaker 2: How do you disappointment as a coach with support for
• 1:22:02
  Speaker 2: somebody like her who just wanted to make a decision
• 1:22:04
  Speaker 2: for herself.
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 13: If a young person is going to speak on what
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 13: what what they deem it is good for them, that's
• 1:22:11
  Speaker 13: half the battle, Like half the battle is to be
• 1:22:14
  Speaker 13: able to speak up. And you know how hard it
• 1:22:16
  Speaker 13: was for her to do that, like really hard, really hard.
• 1:22:19
  Speaker 13: So I understand that dynamics of her decision making.
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 16: And then it's like, okay, well what do you do
• 1:22:25
  Speaker 16: with it?
• 1:22:26
  Speaker 13: Like if she was my player and there was a
• 1:22:29
  Speaker 13: chance for her to want to come back, or if
• 1:22:32
  Speaker 13: she decided that this is that that's not what she
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 13: wanted to do. I was going to talk to her
• 1:22:36
  Speaker 13: about why why did it? Why did it come to that?
• 1:22:39
  Speaker 13: What makes you think this isn't a place for whatever?
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 13: She said we would we would go from there. I
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 13: thought Malaysia. Malaysia was getting better, like I really I
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 13: saw a whole lot of growth on and off the
• 1:22:51
  Speaker 13: court to where unless she was gonna get the best
• 1:22:55
  Speaker 13: of her now like we went through the you know,
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 13: we went through the hard part of just kind of
• 1:23:00
  Speaker 13: than some rough edges and getting her to create good
• 1:23:03
  Speaker 13: habits like like I do think habits are the thing
• 1:23:07
  Speaker 13: that allows you to elevate, right, I do so.
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 16: I think.
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 13: I think what we've given her and what she's given
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 13: us will allow her to have much better days, much
• 1:23:18
  Speaker 13: more consistent days than she had with us at our
• 1:23:22
  Speaker 13: next stop, Well, thank.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 7: You, Don.
• 1:23:23
  Speaker 2: New book Uncommon Favor, Basketball, North Philly, My Mother and
• 1:23:26
  Speaker 2: the Life Lessons I Learned from all three is available
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 2: everywhere you buy books.
• 1:23:29
  Speaker 5: Now, go get it.
• 1:23:30
  Speaker 7: You are guaranteed to learn something you are living.
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 19: Don.
• 1:23:34
  Speaker 2: We appreciate your presence on this earth. We thank God
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 2: for you.
• 1:23:37
  Speaker 16: Thank you, and listen.
• 1:23:38
  Speaker 2: I want everybody to remember that Today Don Staley will
• 1:23:40
  Speaker 2: be at the Barns and Noble Fifth Avenue in New
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 2: York City.
• 1:23:43
  Speaker 7: If you're in New York City, you can.
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 2: Go see Don Staley at Barns and Noble one pm today,
• 1:23:49
  Speaker 2: five five five Fifth Avenue in New York. Go get
• 1:23:51
  Speaker 2: a copy of Uncommon Favor Signs. Don, Thank you.
• 1:23:55
  Speaker 16: Again, Thank you, thank you.
• 1:23:58
  Speaker 5: It's the Breakfast Club.
• 1:23:59
  Speaker 3: Good morning, warning everybody, it's deja envy, just hilarious. Charlamagne
• 1:24:03
  Speaker 3: la Guy. We are the Breakfast Club. It's time for positive.
• 1:24:07
  Speaker 7: Note what we got and the positive note is simply this.
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 2: Nothing that's for you will require you to act out
• 1:24:14
  Speaker 2: of character to get it.
• 1:24:16
  Speaker 7: Always remember that absolutely nothing. Have a great day, Breakfast
• 1:24:19
  Speaker 7: Club bitches.
• 1:24:20
  Speaker 2: Y'all finish for y'all.
• 1:24:21
  Speaker 7: Done,