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COLD CUTS: The Dinner Party · The Hauraki Big Show

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: The Whold Arching Big Show with Jason, Mike and Kezy.
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: Tune in week days at four on Radio Hodichy Radio Head.
• 0:07
  Speaker 2: There on the radio Hold Archy Big Show. This Monday afternoon.
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: The time is four point thirty nine. We were just
• 0:13
  Speaker 2: having a little chit chat with Kezi about his big weekend.
• 0:16
  Speaker 2: He had a dinner party that he was hosting. It
• 0:18
  Speaker 2: was an opportunity for him to climb the social ladder,
• 0:21
  Speaker 2: as it were. His guests were very well to do, Yes,
• 0:24
  Speaker 2: lived in very flashhouses, were very upwardly mobile and Keysy
• 0:29
  Speaker 2: Yes was very keen to impress.
• 0:32
  Speaker 3: I was fellas we talked about the food that was
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: on offer and the drinks made. San Gria didn't nail it,
• 0:37
  Speaker 3: but they enjoyed it because they, like myself and Mogi,
• 0:42
  Speaker 3: big fans of Europe. And to be honest, Jase, if
• 0:47
  Speaker 3: you were there, you would have felt right out of
• 0:49
  Speaker 3: place because most of the topics of conversation we're like,
• 0:51
  Speaker 3: oh when we were in Europe, yeah, oh yeah, I
• 0:55
  Speaker 3: would have I would have yeah, yeah, And then you
• 0:57
  Speaker 3: would have like tried to chime in with some anecdote
• 0:59
  Speaker 3: about Vietnam and ever it would have been like, sorry,
• 1:02
  Speaker 3: we're yeah. Yeah.
• 1:04
  Speaker 2: And my place is a shipthold too, so that wouldn't
• 1:06
  Speaker 2: have gone off to a good.
• 1:07
  Speaker 3: Start if you're hosting.
• 1:08
  Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, and I would have had like zero beers
• 1:11
  Speaker 4: or something really tedious like that.
• 1:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, water or juice yeah yeah yeah. And so like
• 1:17
  Speaker 3: one of the couple where actually thinking of moving to Europe.
• 1:19
  Speaker 5: Really, which I was like, what they feed up with
• 1:21
  Speaker 5: New Zealand? Are they?
• 1:23
  Speaker 3: No, they're just I think he's originally from the UK
• 1:27
  Speaker 3: and she you know, they love Europe and I think
• 1:30
  Speaker 3: they yeah, true, but you just get to a certain
• 1:33
  Speaker 3: point in life where you go stuff it. We just
• 1:35
  Speaker 3: moved to Europe.
• 1:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah, that's bastard for all it's worth on going back
• 1:38
  Speaker 5: to the UK.
• 1:39
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, we squeezed it all out.
• 1:41
  Speaker 2: They, I'm assuming looking at castles and stuff over there
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: to purchase.
• 1:47
  Speaker 3: Yeahs is going to go buy a castle in Europe?
• 1:49
  Speaker 4: Yeah right, yeah, because they're that well to do.
• 1:52
  Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yes, no, I'm serious they are.
• 1:54
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I know, yeah, I know. What was the seeding arrangement?
• 1:57
  Speaker 5: How many couples are we talking here?
• 1:59
  Speaker 3: Three couples?
• 2:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah? And who's sort of organized? Who was sitting where?
• 2:03
  Speaker 5: Was it just a sort of a free for all,
• 2:04
  Speaker 5: or did you sort of say you've got to sit
• 2:06
  Speaker 5: here you Oh no, sorry, you can sit there that
• 2:09
  Speaker 5: that's for it. That's my second keyasy.
• 2:11
  Speaker 3: Yeah. Well, well, basically our dining table only sits four people, right,
• 2:17
  Speaker 3: so we had to all sit in the lounge, right,
• 2:19
  Speaker 3: And so we had the combination of the couch, which
• 2:21
  Speaker 3: is an L shaped couch, coffee table in the middle,
• 2:24
  Speaker 3: and then some cheers scattered around and was.
• 2:26
  Speaker 4: The trough of Portmant's just on the coffee table.
• 2:28
  Speaker 3: No, I was by the doors, right, Yes, that's right,
• 2:31
  Speaker 3: that's right in the conservas.
• 2:32
  Speaker 5: You just grabbed your head like coffee magazine.
• 2:34
  Speaker 3: You just scoop scooping it. That's right, right, And then
• 2:39
  Speaker 3: went down a treat by the way. But we're sitting
• 2:42
  Speaker 3: around the coffee table, and people kept trying to sit
• 2:44
  Speaker 3: on the couch, but I was like, no, no, because
• 2:46
  Speaker 3: they have to move all the throw cushions I'd bought,
• 2:47
  Speaker 3: because I'd bought like fifty a right, so no one
• 2:50
  Speaker 3: could sit on the couch because of all the throw pillows.
• 2:54
  Speaker 3: But to be honest, I was a bit worried about it,
• 2:56
  Speaker 3: but it ended up working really really well.
• 2:58
  Speaker 5: That's great.
• 2:58
  Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, we had a great night.
• 3:00
  Speaker 5: What time did it all wrap up?
• 3:02
  Speaker 3: Ah?
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: Close to midnight? Wow?
• 3:05
  Speaker 5: Okay, that means they enjoyed themselves. Keasy, well done, I think. So.
• 3:09
  Speaker 5: How was the text the next day, because that's when
• 3:11
  Speaker 5: you really find out where you sit. If it goes
• 3:13
  Speaker 5: a bit quite the next day, you know, Oh god,
• 3:14
  Speaker 5: because your missus would have been hanging off the end
• 3:16
  Speaker 5: of her phone.
• 3:17
  Speaker 3: She was hanging off into her phone. Not the text
• 3:19
  Speaker 3: came through lovely, thanks for hosting us last night. Porkmant's
• 3:22
  Speaker 3: cooked beautifully. Yeah, and you must give me the recipe
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: for that. Saying grea Chris was what came through.
• 3:27
  Speaker 4: Anyone stayed the night?
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: No, No one stayed the night obviously, other than my
• 3:32
  Speaker 3: wife and I because we because we lived there. Oh yeah,
• 3:41
  Speaker 3: because we lived there.
• 3:42
  Speaker 2: Jason, Well, it sounds like a roaring success easy and yeah, man,
• 3:50
  Speaker 2: phone calls to come through and opportunities to start pouring in.
• 3:54
  Speaker 3: Yeah, well, to be honest, gave me a real taste
• 3:56
  Speaker 3: for it. If you guys we came to come over
• 3:57
  Speaker 3: for a potluck at mine, I'd be happy to host.
• 4:01
  Speaker 5: The idea is the social climbing though, Isn't it feels
• 4:03
  Speaker 5: like it'll be a backward step for me.
• 4:07
  Speaker 4: Jason, Yeah, I'd be keen to come over. Keasy, when
• 4:11
  Speaker 4: are you thinking?
• 4:13
  Speaker 3: I actually if Mike's not coming then now it's just flag.
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: Day the Hdarchy Big Show weekdays from four on Radio Hodarky.
• 4:23
  Speaker 4: Yes, indeed, hard to think. Are there on the radio Hadarky.
• 4:26
  Speaker 2: Big Show Tuesday evening? The time is five thirty six.
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: And now it was a special day yesterday, of course,
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: Old Moogie, the grand patriarch of the Big Show. Your
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: birthday mate, talk us through your night last night because
• 4:41
  Speaker 2: you had people coming over. I'm very keen to know
• 4:44
  Speaker 2: what happened and transpire.
• 4:45
  Speaker 5: Well, it was just sort of a coincidence that my
• 4:47
  Speaker 5: brother in law was turning up. He was on his way.
• 4:49
  Speaker 5: He was coming back from Canada. Canada. Have you heard
• 4:52
  Speaker 5: of that man? No, it's a place. It's above America apparently, Okay,
• 4:56
  Speaker 5: big bastard, it is there. Wow, lots of trees and rivers.
• 4:59
  Speaker 5: And he works on a fish shop over there. Oh,
• 5:02
  Speaker 5: fish and chips now like fish, So you have your
• 5:05
  Speaker 5: locals will come along and they'll go fishing. It's a
• 5:08
  Speaker 5: bit of a fishing area and then they'll bring the
• 5:10
  Speaker 5: fish into the shop and then these guys will cut
• 5:14
  Speaker 5: it up and fill it and all of that, and
• 5:16
  Speaker 5: then those punters will come back later in the day
• 5:18
  Speaker 5: and pick it up.
• 5:18
  Speaker 3: They'll monger them they and that's called.
• 5:22
  Speaker 5: Yeah, we are the mangerers, the best mongers in town.
• 5:25
  Speaker 5: That's the name of the business. Wow, it's a big sign.
• 5:31
  Speaker 5: And so he's been over there, he's come back. He's
• 5:33
  Speaker 5: got a mate's wedding that he's going anyway. So I
• 5:36
  Speaker 5: tuned up at home and he was sitting in my chair.
• 5:39
  Speaker 5: This is my wife's brother far out at the dinner table.
• 5:43
  Speaker 3: Do you have your own chair.
• 5:45
  Speaker 5: I sit at the head of the table because I'm
• 5:48
  Speaker 5: king Mogi around my house. Yeah. And then my wife
• 5:52
  Speaker 5: sits at the other end of the table.
• 5:55
  Speaker 3: Is she queen?
• 5:55
  Speaker 5: No, I just like it to be as far away
• 5:57
  Speaker 5: as possible.
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: Yeah, it makes sense.
• 6:01
  Speaker 5: And they were sitting down and enjoying what looked like
• 6:04
  Speaker 5: a delicious meal.
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: You didn't have any wow.
• 6:08
  Speaker 5: I mean I didn't feel like I was really welcome,
• 6:10
  Speaker 5: to be honest with you. Wow. It was like it
• 6:13
  Speaker 5: was a messala chicken, like a masala rub it looked
• 6:16
  Speaker 5: like with a bit of a roty bread. And now
• 6:20
  Speaker 5: it was a nun. It was a nun and some
• 6:23
  Speaker 5: rice looked bloody good.
• 6:24
  Speaker 3: That sounds gral.
• 6:25
  Speaker 4: That sounds By the.
• 6:26
  Speaker 5: Time I got there, it was only sort of like bones,
• 6:29
  Speaker 5: chicken bones and that. And they said do you want something?
• 6:31
  Speaker 5: I said, I'm all good. So anyway, I cleared the table,
• 6:35
  Speaker 5: did the dishes and that, Wow, I've sort of the
• 6:39
  Speaker 5: kitchen is my place because if I leave it, you know,
• 6:42
  Speaker 5: it's just yeah. So yeah, and then I know, I
• 6:47
  Speaker 5: was just in a bit of a horror of mose.
• 6:48
  Speaker 5: I just started hooking into the piss.
• 6:51
  Speaker 3: Responsibly, I hope.
• 6:57
  Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah. It turned into sort of a night of
• 7:01
  Speaker 5: just sort of snide remarks and.
• 7:03
  Speaker 4: Yeah, little sides under your breath at that.
• 7:07
  Speaker 5: And it makes it quite uncomfortable when you've got company over.
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: Yeah, so you're doing this in front of the guests.
• 7:14
  Speaker 5: Yeah, and I got the neighbors over as well. Oh
• 7:16
  Speaker 5: really yeah yeah, just so they could know what it's like,
• 7:22
  Speaker 5: you know what I'm going through.
• 7:23
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, the experience you're having.
• 7:25
  Speaker 5: And this is your birthday, this is my this is
• 7:28
  Speaker 5: and I think this is what was so easily forgot it.
• 7:30
  Speaker 5: And this was kind of the point that I was
• 7:32
  Speaker 5: trying to get across last night. I might have been
• 7:35
  Speaker 5: shouting and I might have had a few, but I
• 7:37
  Speaker 5: think the point remains legitimate. That is, I was the
• 7:40
  Speaker 5: birthday boy. Yes, so as the birthday boy, a certain
• 7:44
  Speaker 5: amount of respect needs to be shown totally. It's your
• 7:47
  Speaker 5: party and your cry If that's right, well I shouldn't
• 7:49
  Speaker 5: There shouldn't be any crying.
• 7:51
  Speaker 4: Cake.
• 7:52
  Speaker 5: There was a little bit of cake. I guess what
• 7:54
  Speaker 5: kind it was?
• 7:55
  Speaker 4: Chocolate?
• 7:56
  Speaker 5: Carrot girl?
• 7:58
  Speaker 3: What about?
• 7:59
  Speaker 5: Did you guess what ice in it? Head?
• 8:02
  Speaker 3: Butter crep?
• 8:02
  Speaker 5: It didn't have any iceol.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: Oh wow, just a plain old character that.
• 8:08
  Speaker 5: Sounds it's a heavy bastard, right. It went straight through
• 8:12
  Speaker 5: the wall. Odd, straight through the bastard in one side
• 8:18
  Speaker 5: out the other.
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: Wow.
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, exterior wall.
• 8:22
  Speaker 5: Landed in the neighbor's pool. I will have your birthday mate.
• 8:26
  Speaker 5: She is man.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: The hold Aching Big Show with Jason, Mike and Kyzy.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Tune in week days at four on Radio Holdaking.
• 8:36
  Speaker 2: David Bowie there on the Radio Hodarchy Big Show this
• 8:40
  Speaker 2: Wednesday evening, the time five to twenty nine.
• 8:46
  Speaker 5: This is breaking news, that's right, Fellas, straight off the
• 8:52
  Speaker 5: y as we've received news that there's been an attempt
• 8:55
  Speaker 5: at a strange cure from an eighty two year old
• 8:57
  Speaker 5: Chinese woman. She swallowed live frogs after complaining of a
• 9:04
  Speaker 5: saw lower back.
• 9:07
  Speaker 3: Right.
• 9:07
  Speaker 5: Unfortunately, the consumption of the ape frogs did not cure
• 9:12
  Speaker 5: the lower back pain and only contributed to a saw tummy.
• 9:17
  Speaker 4: Did she ever saw tummy before?
• 9:19
  Speaker 5: Then? No? Apparently the frogs called it caused it?
• 9:22
  Speaker 4: Right?
• 9:22
  Speaker 5: Okay, she ate the live frogs. This is according to
• 9:26
  Speaker 5: the daughter of the eighty two year old woman. She
• 9:30
  Speaker 5: ate the live frogs and now the sharp pain has
• 9:33
  Speaker 5: made her unable to walk.
• 9:35
  Speaker 3: Wow, must be bad.
• 9:37
  Speaker 4: Did she chew them?
• 9:40
  Speaker 5: She swallowed them whole and the trick was Without explaining
• 9:44
  Speaker 5: her plan, she asked her family to catch some frogs
• 9:46
  Speaker 5: for her. They just thought that she wanted to have
• 9:48
  Speaker 5: some frogs. Yeah, like pet frogs. Yeah, like yeah, hey,
• 9:51
  Speaker 5: you know, can you go and catch me some frogs? Sure, mum,
• 9:54
  Speaker 5: that seems pretty normal. Once the family did. Zang that's
• 9:58
  Speaker 5: the name of the woman, swallowed three frogs on the
• 10:02
  Speaker 5: first day.
• 10:04
  Speaker 4: Oh so she didn't do it all at once.
• 10:06
  Speaker 5: She did three to begin with because she thought, you know,
• 10:08
  Speaker 5: when you're having got a sort of like a headache
• 10:10
  Speaker 5: and you go, I might have two. It doesn't work,
• 10:14
  Speaker 5: so it might have another one. So she's taken three
• 10:16
  Speaker 5: that hasn't done it. So the next day she's had five,
• 10:20
  Speaker 5: all roughly the size of an adult palm.
• 10:24
  Speaker 4: So possibly potentially a bull frog.
• 10:26
  Speaker 5: Pretty big good eating? Oh grate for lower back pain?
• 10:31
  Speaker 4: Yeah?
• 10:32
  Speaker 3: Was there like a folk remedy or something? You know,
• 10:36
  Speaker 3: folk like folk?
• 10:37
  Speaker 4: I think you mean you mean folk remedy.
• 10:39
  Speaker 3: The hell's a folk remedy?
• 10:42
  Speaker 5: Now you might be surprised him that she initially experienced
• 10:44
  Speaker 5: mild discomfort, which increased to be really really bad discomfort.
• 10:49
  Speaker 3: This after swallowing the three live frog eight the eight
• 10:53
  Speaker 3: live fight eight.
• 10:55
  Speaker 5: So it was only when she was in severe pain
• 10:57
  Speaker 5: that she confess to her family what she had done.
• 11:00
  Speaker 5: I just want to confess. Remember those frogs that I
• 11:03
  Speaker 5: asked you to get for me because I wanted some pits.
• 11:06
  Speaker 4: What I want to know is I ate all of them?
• 11:09
  Speaker 4: Did she.
• 11:11
  Speaker 2: Experience pain after eating tree frogs? Or was it only
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: when she had another five the next day that she
• 11:18
  Speaker 2: experienced pain.
• 11:19
  Speaker 3: We don't know what kind of frogs that. We don't
• 11:21
  Speaker 3: know if they were tree frogs, they didn't didn't say
• 11:24
  Speaker 3: what kind of frogs. They were, so for you to
• 11:26
  Speaker 3: assume that there were tree frogs, you know, that's how
• 11:29
  Speaker 3: fake news gets you say, three.
• 11:30
  Speaker 4: Frog frogs, three frogs.
• 11:33
  Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, well it sounds like three was fine, and
• 11:36
  Speaker 5: the doctor's recommendation is three to four, right, but she'd
• 11:40
  Speaker 5: essentially odd on frogs.
• 11:44
  Speaker 3: I three to four is all good, right, because that's
• 11:46
  Speaker 3: what the documentary doctor recommends. Three to four take with food. Yeah,
• 11:50
  Speaker 3: three to four is good for lower back pain. Five
• 11:52
  Speaker 3: to eight is really good for sore stomach.
• 11:55
  Speaker 2: I'm amazed that she was able to swallow a whole
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: frog because like with meat, Yeah, no, I can't swallow pels.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: And so my daughter got me a little grindy thing
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: that you can. She needed one of those you check
• 12:07
  Speaker 2: a frog in there and just grind it up and
• 12:09
  Speaker 2: turn it into a kind of soup.
• 12:11
  Speaker 5: And of course it's hard to convince a frog to
• 12:13
  Speaker 5: go into a into any person's mouth, yea, believe me.
• 12:17
  Speaker 5: So the trick is what she did was she swallowed
• 12:19
  Speaker 5: a fly. She showed the fly, she watched the swallow
• 12:26
  Speaker 5: the fly. The frog saw that bang straight down her throat.
• 12:28
  Speaker 3: But she would have had to do that like seven times.
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah, she had and a frog in her throat, and
• 12:35
  Speaker 2: imagine because that would be uncomfortable because if they were
• 12:39
  Speaker 2: swallowed whole, right, yeah, went through the track there, through
• 12:42
  Speaker 2: the system, presumably to be shot out. If it was
• 12:46
  Speaker 2: a whole frog, it might have had its legs akimbo
• 12:49
  Speaker 2: on either side of the anal passuit.
• 12:51
  Speaker 3: Don't let me out.
• 12:52
  Speaker 4: Don't let me out like a breech berth.
• 12:54
  Speaker 3: Here's anything in the article about that, Mogi.
• 12:57
  Speaker 5: Let me just have a look here, pinal column.
• 13:02
  Speaker 3: You know what, I don't worry about it.
• 13:05
  Speaker 1: The hold Aching Big Show with Jace, Mike and Kezy.
• 13:08
  Speaker 1: Tune in week days at four on radio.
• 13:10
  Speaker 2: Holdachi Savage there on the radio, Hold Ankey Big Show
• 13:14
  Speaker 2: this Thursday afternoon, sixteen minutes past five o'clock.
• 13:17
  Speaker 3: You only five dollars?
• 13:19
  Speaker 4: Sure? Men?
• 13:20
  Speaker 3: Like seriously, you dear five dollars?
• 13:21
  Speaker 4: Not on me? No, I don't carry cash.
• 13:23
  Speaker 5: It's convenient, isn't it.
• 13:24
  Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, I'll tell you what.
• 13:26
  Speaker 2: That will probably pay for the sex golf balls of
• 13:29
  Speaker 2: mine you lost today.
• 13:31
  Speaker 3: It was three heats of text coming through on three
• 13:34
  Speaker 3: four eight three. Shit the bid Keezy Keezy picked a stinker.
• 13:37
  Speaker 3: Why is it my fault that Jase one with an
• 13:39
  Speaker 3: atrocious song.
• 13:40
  Speaker 5: I think I just pointed out how bad that song was,
• 13:42
  Speaker 5: or maybe it was the part of the song that
• 13:44
  Speaker 5: was chosen. Whose choice was that? Because I could' actually
• 13:46
  Speaker 5: identify what the song was.
• 13:48
  Speaker 3: Summer Breeze makes me feel fine? By the Isley brother tune.
• 13:51
  Speaker 5: He wasn't that by the guitar solo, you know what
• 13:53
  Speaker 5: I mean?
• 13:54
  Speaker 3: Bro Well, I felt like I had to trouble it up,
• 13:56
  Speaker 3: you know what I mean?
• 13:57
  Speaker 4: Sure, that's good tune it.
• 14:00
  Speaker 5: Yeah, I like that. I like that.
• 14:04
  Speaker 3: This text on three four eight three about Jason throbber,
• 14:06
  Speaker 3: that's effing ship. Yeah, what a load of ship? Hip
• 14:13
  Speaker 3: swing for the win? There you go, absolute sickos, tedious listen,
• 14:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah what is the ship? Fellas? I just stabbed myself
• 14:23
  Speaker 3: in the ears with a screwdriver, so I don't have
• 14:25
  Speaker 3: to listen to that ship.
• 14:26
  Speaker 4: That it hurt.
• 14:27
  Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, yeah, don't want Some people liked it? Yeah,
• 14:31
  Speaker 5: you know, hip swing for the win.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: Is what it is.
• 14:37
  Speaker 5: Hey, you know, say Jason wins a win win, how's
• 14:41
  Speaker 5: a scoreboard looking there?
• 14:42
  Speaker 3: Kezy Mike and Jason tired on twelve Yeah, here you go,
• 14:46
  Speaker 3: But Jason's got two asterisks for coercing a listener and
• 14:49
  Speaker 3: picking a Pantera song that has a thousand f bombs
• 14:51
  Speaker 3: and it I'm on, I'm in, I'm on seven. Oh yeah,
• 14:55
  Speaker 3: I'm on seven wins.
• 14:56
  Speaker 5: Right, how many weeks left in the year?
• 14:58
  Speaker 3: Don't look at your watch like that has a calend
• 15:00
  Speaker 3: there on it. And I have two asterisks as well
• 15:04
  Speaker 3: for bullying Mogi and playing Freeman. Is that funny?
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: Is it?
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah?
• 15:10
  Speaker 4: It's quite amusing.
• 15:11
  Speaker 5: All right?
• 15:12
  Speaker 3: Well, for everyone that hated Savage, you got an absolute
• 15:14
  Speaker 3: throb before you.
• 15:14
  Speaker 4: Now, Oh how good guns?
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: The Hurarchy Big Show weekdays from four on Radio Hdarchy