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Empowered: Standing Strong · Sandra Elizabeth - The Leadership Collective

• 0:17
  At some point in life, everyone will need to have the ability to stand strong.
• 0:23
  Now, when we hear the phrase standing strong, many of us picture someone that is confident, bold, and completely in control.
• 0:33
  But let's be honest, most people don't feel that way.
• 0:37
  Sometimes standing strong looks nothing like confidence.
• 0:41
  It might look like getting out of bed when you don't feel like facing the day.
• 0:46
  There are times when it looks like showing up to work after receiving bad news.
• 0:51
  Sometimes it means smiling at people while carrying burdens that nobody knows about.
• 0:58
  Strength is not about never feeling broken.
• 1:01
  Strength, in fact, is continuing even when you don't feel like it.
• 1:07
  Many people think standing strong means pretending everything is fine, but it doesn't mean that.
• 1:14
  Standing strong means facing reality without surrendering to it.
• 1:19
  It means acknowledging the pain without allowing the pain to become your identity.
• 1:25
  Think about a tree during a storm.
• 1:28
  The strongest trees aren't the ones that never move, they're the ones that bend without breaking.
• 1:36
  The rigid tree often snaps, the flexible tree survives.
• 1:41
  And the same is true for us as human beings.
• 1:44
  Real strength is not about stubbornness or resilience, but it's the ability to adapt, recover, and continue.
• 1:54
  It means choosing to move forward one step at a time when life becomes difficult.
• 2:01
  And perhaps that's the first lesson of today's episode.
• 2:06
  You don't have to be fearless to be strong, you don't have to have all the answers, you don't have to feel confident every day.
• 2:14
  You simply have to keep standing.
• 2:17
  Because strength isn't measured by how loudly you fight, it's measured by how faithfully you continue.
• 2:25
  So today ask yourself: what challenge am I facing right now?
• 2:30
  And what would it look like to simply take the next step?
• 2:34
  Not the next 10 steps, not the next year, just the step.
• 2:40
  Sometimes standing strong starts there.
• 2:44
  One step, one decision, and one day at a time.
• 2:49
  So ask yourself another question.
• 2:52
  Why is standing strong so hard?
• 2:56
  Let's talk about why standing strong is so hard.
• 3:00
  Let's talk about why standing strong is so difficult.
• 3:04
  Because if we're truly honest, most people don't struggle with being strong for a day.
• 3:09
  The challenge actually comes when the pressure doesn't leave.
• 3:13
  It's one thing to face a difficult week, it's another thing to face a difficult year.
• 3:19
  Have you ever noticed how people often say, oh, just hang in there?
• 3:23
  And yes, that sounds encouraging.
• 3:27
  But it sounds encouraging only until you've been hanging in there for months or years.
• 3:33
  I once met a person who lost her job after working for the same company for about 23 years.
• 3:39
  She thought finding another job would take a few weeks.
• 3:43
  Weeks became months, months became over a year.
• 3:48
  And so each interview ended with disappointment, each rejection chipped away at her confidence.
• 3:55
  What really made it so difficult wasn't the rejection itself.
• 3:58
  It was the uncertainty, the not knowing, the waiting.
• 4:02
  And that's often what wears us down.
• 4:05
  Not the storm, not the length of the storm, not the unanswered questions.
• 4:10
  The delayed breakthrough, the endless waiting room of life.
• 4:14
  Many people quit not because they are weak, they quit because they are exhausted.
• 4:19
  And that's why standing strong requires endurance.
• 4:23
  And endurance is simply strength stretched over time.
• 4:28
  Your strength begins on the inside.
• 4:31
  It begins on the inside of you.
• 4:34
  One of the biggest mistakes people make is trying to look strong before they actually become strong.
• 4:41
  Real strength starts internally.
• 4:45
  Think about a skyscraper.
• 4:47
  People admire the height.
• 4:50
  Nobody talks about the foundation.
• 4:52
  Isn't that true?
• 4:53
  Think about it.
• 4:55
  Yet the taller the building, the deeper the foundation must be.
• 4:59
  And the same is true for us.
• 5:01
  When life begins to shake us, we discover what we're built on.
• 5:06
  When you're going through a hard time, your greatest challenge isn't about rebuilding your life, it's about rebuilding yourself.
• 5:15
  You have to learn to be independent of your circumstances because that's where true strength is formed.
• 5:23
  Allow your identity to be rooted in your values instead of your circumstances.
• 5:29
  Ask yourself: who am I when everything around me changes?
• 5:33
  What do I stand for?
• 5:35
  What values am I willing to compromise?
• 5:38
  You see, the stronger your foundation, the stronger your future.
• 5:42
  So how do you stand strong without becoming hard?
• 5:47
  One of the dangers of pain is that it can make us hard.
• 5:51
  We've all met people like that.
• 5:53
  We even meet ourselves.
• 5:55
  People who were hurt deeply will stop trusting, they stop caring, they stop opening their hearts, they convince themselves that they are becoming stronger.
• 6:07
  But in fact, we are actually becoming harder.
• 6:11
  There is a difference.
• 6:13
  Strength remains open, hardness closes down.
• 6:18
  Strength remains teachable, hardness becomes defensive.
• 6:22
  Strength can bend, hardness eventually breaks.
• 6:26
  You can tell yourself, I will never let anyone hurt me again.
• 6:32
  And at first it will sound wise, but really what you are saying is I will never let anyone close enough again because pain builds walls.
• 6:43
  The problem with walls is that they keep pain out, but they also keep connection out.
• 6:49
  Standing strong doesn't mean becoming emotionally unavailable, it means learning how to protect yourself, protect your peace without losing your humanity.
• 7:01
  So let's move on to standing strong in difficult relationships.
• 7:07
  Some of life's greatest tests comes through people, not circumstances.
• 7:13
  Yes, people.
• 7:15
  The difficult boss, the controlling friend, the toxic family member, the person who constantly drains your energy, the person who is abusive to you.
• 7:26
  So standing strong in relationships doesn't always mean fighting.
• 7:30
  Sometimes it means setting boundaries.
• 7:34
  I'm sure you can identify with this woman.
• 7:37
  There was a woman who spent years trying to make everyone happy.
• 7:42
  She said yes when she wanted to say no.
• 7:45
  She sacrificed her own needs to avoid disappointing others.
• 7:49
  She sacrificed her own dreams in order to build someone else's empire.
• 7:55
  Eventually she became exhausted.
• 7:57
  Not because people demanded too much, but because she never learned how to protect her own space.
• 8:04
  The day she started saying no was the day she began standing strong.
• 8:10
  And when she stood strong, people would start to call her insecure.
• 8:15
  When she stood strong, people didn't like her.
• 8:18
  When she stood strong, she became a problem to others.
• 8:23
  So you don't need everyone to understand you, you don't need everyone to understand your boundaries.
• 8:29
  Respect yourself, respect your boundaries.
• 8:32
  Standing strong often means choosing self-respect over the approval of others, and that can become uncomfortable, but it is absolutely necessary.
• 8:43
  Standing strong also makes you feel like you're standing alone.
• 8:49
  There are seasons in life when the crowd disappears, your friends disappear, the phone stops ringing, the invitations become fewer, the support feels distant.
• 9:01
  The very people you once trusted seems to disappear.
• 9:07
  And loneliness begins to whisper dangerous thoughts.
• 9:11
  Maybe I'm failing, maybe nobody cares, maybe I'm doing something wrong.
• 9:16
  But loneliness is not always evidence of failure, it is evidence of growth.
• 9:23
  Think about the butterfly.
• 9:25
  Before it flies, it enters the cocoon alone.
• 9:30
  Transformation often happens in isolation.
• 9:33
  You got to be alone.
• 9:35
  Some of your greatest breakthroughs may happen in private moments that nobody ever sees.
• 9:42
  The quiet seasons in life teach us lessons that busy seasons cannot.
• 9:48
  They teach you self-awareness, patience, resilience, confidence.
• 9:55
  Sometimes being alone is not punishment, it's actually preparation.
• 10:00
  How do we stand strong through failure and loss?
• 10:05
  Well, failure has a way of making us question everything: a failed business, a failed relationship, a missed opportunity, or even a dream that didn't work out.
• 10:19
  Suddenly we begin asking ourselves difficult questions.
• 10:24
  Was I wrong?
• 10:26
  Am I good enough?
• 10:27
  Should I stop trying?
• 10:30
  I read a story about a business person who invested his life savings into a business.
• 10:37
  Within 18 months, it collapsed.
• 10:41
  He lost almost everything.
• 10:43
  And for months and months he felt embarrassed and totally defeated.
• 10:49
  But years later, he said something very interesting.
• 10:53
  The business failed, but I didn't.
• 10:57
  What a powerful distinction.
• 10:59
  You can actually experience failure without becoming a failure.
• 11:04
  The event is not your identity, the setback is not your story, the loss is not the end.
• 11:11
  Every person carries scars, every resilient person has survived disappointment.
• 11:18
  So strength is not just avoiding loss, strength is learning how to keep moving after it.
• 11:26
  Make an effort to stay strong daily.
• 11:30
  You know, many people wait for a life-changing breakthrough, but strength is rarely built through dramatic moments.
• 11:37
  It's actually built through ordinary days.
• 11:40
  Your daily choices, your small decisions, tiny acts of discipline.
• 11:46
  It's about choosing to get up, choosing to learn, choosing to care for yourself, choosing to take responsibility, choosing to rest when it's necessary.
• 11:56
  Think of strength like a savings account.
• 12:00
  Every positive decision is a small deposit.
• 12:03
  One deposit doesn't seem significant, but over time the account grows.
• 12:09
  The same is true with your resilience.
• 12:12
  Small choices repeated consistently create extraordinary strength.
• 12:19
  Don't underestimate the small steps that you take.
• 12:22
  It may be building tomorrow's breakthrough.
• 12:26
  The steps that you take could really influence the life of someone else.
• 12:32
  Someone is always watching, your children, your family, your colleagues, your friends, your community.
• 12:39
  People may never tell you, but they notice how you respond under pressure.
• 12:44
  They notice whether you quit, they notice whether you keep going.
• 12:49
  They notice when you choose to accept abuse.
• 12:53
  They notice when you say enough is enough.
• 12:57
  One day, someone will tell you, you taught us what courage looks like.
• 13:02
  When you think nobody is watching, let me remind you, somebody is.
• 13:08
  The way you stand today may become someone else's inspiration tomorrow.
• 13:13
  Your strength creates ripples you may never fully see.
• 13:18
  As I come to the end of today's podcast, I want to leave you with this thought.
• 13:23
  You do not have to have everything figured out.
• 13:27
  You do not have to feel strong every day.
• 13:30
  You do not need to feel perfect every day.
• 13:33
  Standing strong is not about perfection, it's about persistence.
• 13:39
  It's about choosing to continue when quitting would be easier.
• 13:43
  It's about choosing the right path.
• 13:46
  It's about taking the next step when the path ahead feels uncertain.
• 13:51
  It's about making decisions that will change your life.
• 13:56
  Life will shake all of us at some point.
• 13:59
  Challenges will come, losses will happen, disappointments will arrive uninvited.
• 14:06
  People will arrive uninvited.
• 14:09
  People will desecrate your life, they will desecrate your home, they will desecrate your organization.
• 14:15
  But remember this: you have survived difficult days before.
• 14:21
  You have overcome obstacles before.
• 14:23
  You have made it through storms before, and you can do it again.
• 14:27
  If you're tired, take a rest.
• 14:30
  If you're discouraged, pause.
• 14:32
  If you're uncertain, take time to breathe.
• 14:36
  But don't give up.
• 14:37
  Keep moving, keep growing, keep standing, keep moving forward.
• 14:42
  Because the strongest people are not those who never struggle, they are the ones who refuse to stay down.
• 14:49
  And perhaps that's what standing strong is really all about.
• 14:55
  Not avoiding the storm, but becoming the person who can withstand that storm.
• 15:01
  I'm Sandra Elizabeth.
• 15:03
  Thank you for joining me on this first episode in a series called Unbreakable.
• 15:09
  I look forward to having you join me once again next week.
• 15:14
  If you would like to make contact with us or purchase some of our books, please email me at sandra at leadingauthority.co.za.
• 15:26
  Have a superb week ahead.