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Hot Thoughts, Part 4: When Sacrifice Hides Selfishness · Couples’ Journey Podcast Channel

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  Are your sacrifices actually leading to true humility and unity in your marriage?
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  Welcome to Part 4 of Couples Journey blog series podcast entitled, Hot Thoughts.
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  Today, Annie shares her journey of self-discovery and how God's grace transformed
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  her perspective, showing that real teamwork in marriage depends on renewal of
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  the mind through Christ. Here's Annie.
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  Before I met Ray, I had a very different life. My exposure to hard work and
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  independence shaped me to survive on my own, relying on myself.
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  I maintained a good relationship with my family, but it wasn't close enough
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  for us to extend much help to each other.
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  So I learned to be resourceful and to attend to most of my needs independently.
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  When I decided to marry Ray, I knew there will be a significant adjustment on my part.
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  Aside from the legal process involved in moving from the Philippines to the
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  United States, which required me to stay home, I also took this time to re-evaluate
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  many things During my early days here in the USA,
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  I realized how vital teamwork is for a married couple Because we started with
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  immediate responsibilities and had to deal with the consequences of our past
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  relationships We understood that we needed to set aside selfish desires to prevent
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  ourselves from being overwhelmed.
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  We managed to communicate and made plans, but there were still moments when
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  my sacrifices overwhelmed me.
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  The exhaustion from physical fatigue would trigger emotional responses and sometimes
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  reveal many self-centeredness.
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  I will never forget one particular moment when Ray came home from work,
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  tired and exhausted, and I met him at the door crying,
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  feeling close to giving up on caring for our newborn who was only four years
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  apart from our other child.
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  Exhausted, overwhelmed, and struggling to see myself clearly,
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  perhaps because of the postpartum effects.
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  I felt upset about how different my life was when I was single,
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  enjoying my career, and independence.
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  I found myself in a day where I couldn't even enjoy a good shower because I
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  had to bring my kids with me into the bathroom to make sure they wouldn't have
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  accidents inside the house.
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  Ray was very patient with me, but it didn't lead me to realize my self-centeredness.
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  Instead, the more I fell into Satan's temptations, especially when we moved
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  to San Diego after Arizona, where Ray was on ship duty.
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  His return to the ship brought six-month deployments, leaving me alone in military
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  housing with two young children. I was navigating my role as a military wife
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  and mother completely alone.
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  Looking back on those years, I realized how much pain, sacrifice,
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  and lack of grounding in God's truths had shaped pride and self-centeredness in me.
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  Teamwork I thought existed between Ray and me wasn't truly healthy.
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  It was more a survival technique to keep our marriage afloat.
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  I thank God for His grace. He didn't allow us to be dragged down by the breakdown of our marriage.
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  Ray and I have witnessed how many marriages fall apart under the pressure and
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  hardship of military life.
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  These sacrifices can easily trigger Satan's temptations toward pride and unhealthy
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  self-centeredness, things we were not fully aware of at that time.
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  When we finally hear God's voice and sense his intervention in our lives,
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  I am grateful that God humbled us.
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  The cycle could have been even harder with our growing children.
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  Jesus' sacrifice on the cross erased every claim of sacrifices I thought I made
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  for our marriage and family.
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  I saw myself as unworthy, yet Jesus lovingly and graciously sacrificed himself
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  to save me and give me hope, hope for a transformed life, marriage, and family.
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  And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of
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  your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good
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  and acceptable and perfect.
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  Romans 12, verse 2.
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  Before we close, we want to invite you to engage with us and support the Couples
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  Journey blog series podcast.
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  By following this channel, leaving comments, and sharing episodes with your family and friends.
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  You're helping us in our mission to transform marriages today.
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  Your support encourages more couples to seek God's guidance and grow stronger together.
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  Learn more about this movement on the website www.couplesjourney.org.
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  Thank you for being part of this journey. Together, we can make a difference.
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  Here's the final part of today's episode.
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  As we conclude this episode, remember that God's transformative power is available to all of us.
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  Any story reminds us that surrendering pride and self-centeredness begins with
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  trusting God's grace to renew our minds and hearts.
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  Stay tuned tomorrow for the last part of this series, where we will explore
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  practical ways to live out these biblical truths daily. Don't miss it. See you then.