Latest / Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash / #269 Parental Trauma Starts at the Airport

Transcript

#269 Parental Trauma Starts at the Airport · Two Doting Dads with Matty J & Ash

• 0:01
  Speaker 1: I've got some very sad news. News. I've got some
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: very sad news.
• 0:05
  Speaker 2: Do I want sad news?
• 0:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's sad. It's okay. My nan's 19-year-old bird died.
• 0:10
  Speaker 2: I thought you were going to say she was going
• 0:12
  Speaker 2: to die. I know. May I ask what breed of bird?
• 0:17
  Speaker 1: Old. Old.
• 0:19
  Speaker 2: My favourite.
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: And just so you know, he has been buried, Pretty Boy,
• 0:23
  Speaker 1: that was it, the name. Pretty Boy has been buried
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: in the cemetery down the back. Okay, now start the
• 0:29
  Speaker 1: show and I'm going to give you a list of
• 0:30
  Speaker 1: the animals that are in said cemetery.
• 0:32
  Speaker 2: Just quickly, the little, oh, from Vic. Music Welcome back
• 0:53
  Speaker 2: to Two Dotting Dads. I'm Matty J.
• 0:56
  Speaker 1: And I'm Ash.
• 0:58
  Speaker 2: And this is a podcast all about parenting. It is
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: the good, it is the bad.
• 1:01
  Speaker 1: And the regrettable.
• 1:02
  Speaker 2: And we don't give advice.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: I don't know, it just came to me.
• 1:05
  Speaker 2: I'm going to have to change the logos, aren't we?
• 1:08
  Speaker 1: Ah, whatever. So, Bird, dead. Can confirm. She's very upset
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: about it. She sent us some flowers.
• 1:14
  Speaker 2: 19 years.
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: My sister did and then I just attached my name
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: to it.
• 1:18
  Speaker 3: We all do it.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, when you've got a sibling, you're just like, should
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: we send some flowers? Why don't we send one group
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: of flowers, just put our names on it, and it's
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: like $ 12 each.
• 1:26
  Speaker 2: Budgery?
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: No, it was like a.
• 1:29
  Speaker 2: Parrot.
• 1:30
  Speaker 1: Something along those lines. It wasn't a budgie, I know that,
• 1:32
  Speaker 1: because how I know that is the budgie is also
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: buried in the backyard, which is my budgie, in the cemetery. Now,
• 1:40
  Speaker 1: the animals that are in there, There's an array of animals.
• 1:43
  Speaker 2: In the backyard, sorry.
• 1:44
  Speaker 1: In the backyard, buried in the backyard, okay. My grandfather,
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: who is also dead, is not in the backyard.
• 1:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
• 1:51
  Speaker 1: He's on top. Nan still talks to him. Anyway, down
• 1:56
  Speaker 1: in the back we've got a couple of dogs from
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: my childhood. We've got Prince, Honey. They all died of
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: old age, I think. There's Goldfish, a couple of Goldfish,
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: a lot of birds. A lot of cats.
• 2:09
  Speaker 2: How many cats?
• 2:11
  Speaker 1: Oh, my nan would do the thing where she'd take
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: in strays and have them for like 20 years and
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: then they'd die. They'd have a great life and then
• 2:17
  Speaker 1: she'd bury them down the back.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 2:19
  Speaker 1: There's a horse down there.
• 2:20
  Speaker 2: What?
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: Not even kidding. Sandy is the horse's name.
• 2:23
  Speaker 2: Mate, when people redevelop that block of land and they
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: start excavating and they're like, oh, my God, it's Noah's Ark.
• 2:29
  Speaker 1: Would it shock you to know that there's more than
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: one horse? What? Yeah. Who?
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:35
  Speaker 1: So my auntie was back in the 70s and 80s.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: They were horse people. Okay. Just be mindful. One of
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: the horses' name is Sandy. The other horse's name is
• 2:45
  Speaker 1: an inappropriate word for someone, which I will not say.
• 2:49
  Speaker 1: And just be mindful. It was like the 50s and
• 2:51
  Speaker 1: the 60s. It started off with this horse. So very
• 2:54
  Speaker 1: different times. Anyway, so horses buried down there and now
• 2:57
  Speaker 1: Pretty Boy's buried down there as well.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow. So who dug the hole for Pretty Boy?
• 3:03
  Speaker 1: The bird.
• 3:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 3:04
  Speaker 4: Man.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: Man's like, oh, that's the horse bone. Oh, that's a cat. Yeah.
• 3:08
  Speaker 1: I hope they're deeper than that.
• 3:10
  Speaker 2: She's got like a map of where there's like a
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: free block of like. Yeah.
• 3:13
  Speaker 1: I've got like their names.
• 3:15
  Speaker 3: Is there like little tombstones?
• 3:17
  Speaker 1: There was at one stage there was powder pop sticks up. Yeah.
• 3:20
  Speaker 1: With like a little cross. Yeah.
• 3:21
  Speaker 3: We did that in our backyard growing up.
• 3:23
  Speaker 1: Did you? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I thought it was real weird.
• 3:25
  Speaker 3: Not that many animals, though.
• 3:27
  Speaker 1: No horses?
• 3:29
  Speaker 2: No, I don't think anyone's got a horse in the backyard.
• 3:30
  Speaker 2: Good on her, though.
• 3:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah, horses, Tommy, Prince, Honey, they're all down there. The
• 3:34
  Speaker 1: whole gang's down there.
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: Does she want to get buried there?
• 3:37
  Speaker 1: She would if she could, but she won't. Not allowed.
• 3:39
  Speaker 1: Not allowed. Not allowed.
• 3:40
  Speaker 2: Council, fun place.
• 3:42
  Speaker 1: Fun place.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: My sister had a goldfish that died and she buried it.
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: And I think I must have been about five or six,
• 3:49
  Speaker 2: maybe seven. Who knows? But in my head I was like, ooh,
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: it'll be a fossil. And I was like, I want
• 3:56
  Speaker 2: to dig it up and find the fossil. And so
• 3:58
  Speaker 2: I dug it up and she was.
• 3:59
  Speaker 1: Like, ah, what are you doing?
• 4:02
  Speaker 2: I got in so much trouble. I was like, I'm
• 4:03
  Speaker 2: just trying to find the fossil here, guys.
• 4:06
  Speaker 1: Where's the dinosaur bones? Nan was burying the bird and
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: she was like, I think the cat saw me doing it.
• 4:11
  Speaker 1: Because she's still got a cat. She was like, I
• 4:14
  Speaker 1: always try to bury the animals without the cat seeing me.
• 4:17
  Speaker 1: But the cat, cause she was like, I got home
• 4:19
  Speaker 1: and the cat was digging up the bloody. Horse. She's
• 4:22
  Speaker 1: like got a horse in his mouth.
• 4:23
  Speaker 2: Horse, horse, horse. Well, anyway.
• 4:26
  Speaker 1: But anyway, dead horse now.
• 4:27
  Speaker 2: Hey, this episode is for pretty boy. rest in peace
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: almost two decades what a great innings.
• 4:34
  Speaker 1: I know and all the other animals buried amongst pretty
• 4:36
  Speaker 1: boy the horses the dolphins whatever else is down there
• 4:40
  Speaker 1: i don't know but they did have i remember they
• 4:42
  Speaker 1: did have a kangaroo for a long time fuck off
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: they did it was a wallaby but i'm pretty sure
• 4:46
  Speaker 1: they rehabilitated that and moved it on they love animals.
• 4:50
  Speaker 2: No wow she's got photos of all these animals she
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: needs a new hobby yeah i remember the kangaroo was
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: a funny one Anyway, moving on. I need to just
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: put a message out there publicly.
• 5:01
  Speaker 1: Shoot.
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: And let everyone know that I don't hate Dave Hughes.
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: What do you mean?
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 5:08
  Speaker 1: What happened?
• 5:09
  Speaker 2: So for anyone who may... Not have heard us talk
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: about this. I swear we've talked about it.
• 5:13
  Speaker 1: We've had him on the podcast.
• 5:14
  Speaker 2: We've had him on the podcast. Good friend of the podcast.
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: I was on a TV show with him. I'm a celebrity.
• 5:17
  Speaker 2: Get me out of here. We're friends, I think.
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: I think. Yeah, he's just shooting his mouth a lot lately.
• 5:23
  Speaker 2: He has been shooting his mouth a lot.
• 5:24
  Speaker 1: That's him.
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: That's him. And that's Dayfuse. That's a Dayfuse. We love
• 5:27
  Speaker 2: a note.
• 5:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: So, Ash, we've spoken about the fact that nothing feels
• 5:32
  Speaker 2: quite as good as getting a viral comment on a
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: video on social media.
• 5:36
  Speaker 1: It's better than making the best video ever.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: Do I dare say it's better than sex?
• 5:40
  Speaker 3: Definitely not.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: Am I right, guys? You're having the wrong type of sex.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: Get a sex pillow.
• 5:46
  Speaker 2: I know.
• 5:46
  Speaker 1: You'll have a different thought.
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: I can't afford them. But he did a video recently
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: and I saw an opportunity to have a joke.
• 5:54
  Speaker 1: Did you steal one of my jokes or did you
• 5:55
  Speaker 1: use the original?
• 5:56
  Speaker 2: No, I have stolen a lot of your lines.
• 5:57
  Speaker 1: And they've all been fine.
• 5:58
  Speaker 2: They've all been great. This was a Matty J original
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: and my finger was hovering over the like, do I
• 6:03
  Speaker 2: press yes to this comment? Do I send it? And
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: I was like, nah. And then I was like, fuck it.
• 6:10
  Speaker 2: Dave Hughes will find it funny. I'll show you the video.
• 6:12
  Speaker 1: Oh, God. If I had a time machine, I'd go
• 6:14
  Speaker 1: back to 2022 and I would have not mocked whoever
• 6:18
  Speaker 1: came up with the term. It won't be easy under Albanese.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Let's have a look at it. Since he was elected. Okay.
• 6:25
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Okay.
• 6:27
  Speaker 1: He's very somber in that video compared to his normal.
• 6:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. Does he look like he's ready for a joke?
• 6:35
  Speaker 2: I thought he did.
• 6:37
  Speaker 1: Not really.
• 6:38
  Speaker 2: So I said.
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: Oh, fuck. She's a lucky lady.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: I said, are you sure you wouldn't go back in
• 6:45
  Speaker 2: time and ask for a different haircut first? What?
• 6:51
  Speaker 1: I just complimented his hair. It's nice.
• 6:54
  Speaker 2: That's why it's a joke because it's a good haircut.
• 6:57
  Speaker 1: You can set your watch to that hairline. Right?
• 6:59
  Speaker 2: It's a fresh haircut. Dave Hughes will find this funny.
• 7:02
  Speaker 2: So will his followers. Read the comments.
• 7:05
  Speaker 5: Oh, no.
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: Oh, fuck.
• 7:07
  Speaker 3: Are you getting cancelled?
• 7:08
  Speaker 1: There's one like on your comment. That says it all.
• 7:11
  Speaker 1: And it's from me. No mirror at home, Maddie. He's
• 7:18
  Speaker 1: trying to advocate for the average Australian. All you can
• 7:21
  Speaker 1: do to attempt is insult him.
• 7:23
  Speaker 5: Oh.
• 7:23
  Speaker 1: Ripping into how blokes look instead of engaging with his
• 7:26
  Speaker 1: conversation is definitely father of the year, babe. Oh, God.
• 7:30
  Speaker 1: Read the room. Oh, my God.
• 7:34
  Speaker 6: Oh, my God.
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: 400K followers, a blue tick, and this is what you
• 7:36
  Speaker 1: use the platform for?
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, wow.
• 7:39
  Speaker 1: Really? Surely something hacked your account. Yeah, they did.
• 7:42
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have to say I've been hacked.
• 7:45
  Speaker 1: I'm tipping that didn't go well.
• 7:49
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God. I was like.
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: That's funny.
• 7:53
  Speaker 2: I said, you know what? I'm going to go check
• 7:55
  Speaker 2: in on that comment to see how it's going.
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: One like.
• 7:59
  Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, my God.
• 8:02
  Speaker 1: Not your best move.
• 8:04
  Speaker 2: That was a funny joke.
• 8:05
  Speaker 1: It's harmless, but it's harmless because I think like the
• 8:09
  Speaker 1: joke is going to be in that situation for the audience,
• 8:12
  Speaker 1: not for him. Because he's probably not going to see that.
• 8:14
  Speaker 2: I didn't even, to be honest, I didn't hear what
• 8:17
  Speaker 2: he was saying about Albanese.
• 8:18
  Speaker 1: Nah, me either.
• 8:19
  Speaker 3: Has he responded?
• 8:21
  Speaker 2: He hasn't.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Okay. Would you like to say sorry?
• 8:24
  Speaker 5: No.
• 8:25
  Speaker 1: You brought unnecessary attention to his head.
• 8:27
  Speaker 2: Because it's funny because it's a good haircut. Fuck, I'll
• 8:30
  Speaker 2: never comment.
• 8:31
  Speaker 1: On another video. It's funny. To me it was funny.
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: Because it was like random. Everyone else is not thinking
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: so much. But it's all right. Hey. Hey, you'll get
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: them next time.
• 8:41
  Speaker 2: I hope so.
• 8:42
  Speaker 1: You should retract it. You should go in there and
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: be like, I was hacked and see what happens.
• 8:46
  Speaker 2: Well, I thought I would double down and be like,
• 8:47
  Speaker 2: fucking tough crowd.
• 8:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, do that.
• 8:50
  Speaker 5: No.
• 8:50
  Speaker 2: Dave Hughes, if you're listening, I love you.
• 8:54
  Speaker 3: Let's join the pile on Ash.
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I will.
• 8:57
  Speaker 3: Don't.
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: I don't need that.
• 8:59
  Speaker 1: Can you remind me to find that later?
• 9:01
  Speaker 2: If you're listening, can you go to that? Please go
• 9:04
  Speaker 2: to that video on Dave Hughes. It's like the third
• 9:05
  Speaker 2: one in his feed. And just be like, ha, ha, ha.
• 9:08
  Speaker 1: Don't do it.
• 9:08
  Speaker 2: That's really funny, Matt.
• 9:09
  Speaker 4: Don't do it.
• 9:09
  Speaker 2: That's really funny.
• 9:10
  Speaker 1: I endorse you not doing it.
• 9:12
  Speaker 3: Let's see the power of the doters.
• 9:13
  Speaker 2: Help me out.
• 9:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, if you double down on everyone else, then there's
• 9:17
  Speaker 1: free hats involved.
• 9:18
  Speaker 2: Look, whenever I try and make a joke, actually Father
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: of the Year, that award's come back to bite me
• 9:21
  Speaker 2: in the ass because every time I do something that's
• 9:23
  Speaker 2: like a joke, everyone's like, well, that's not very Fatherly
• 9:24
  Speaker 2: of the Year.
• 9:25
  Speaker 1: That's exactly why I don't want it and won't get it. No,
• 9:29
  Speaker 1: I definitely don't want it. It's not for me. Talent Savings, Matt. Well,
• 9:32
  Speaker 1: you were in Queensland. Bangladesh is Queensland, right? Correct.
• 9:35
  Speaker 2: Well said.
• 9:35
  Speaker 1: Is it the western coast of Queensland or is it
• 9:37
  Speaker 1: just really high up the top?
• 9:39
  Speaker 2: High up the top, it's near Townsville. Townsville. I think
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: it's Townsville. Which one's first? Cairns first and Townsville? It
• 9:45
  Speaker 2: always gets mixed up.
• 9:45
  Speaker 1: It's so much further than people think.
• 9:47
  Speaker 3: It is.
• 9:47
  Speaker 2: Laura was like, oh, yeah, the bloody flight's only going
• 9:50
  Speaker 2: to be an hour. And I'm like, it's like an
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: hour to Brisbane.
• 9:52
  Speaker 1: It's like four hours, isn't it?
• 9:55
  Speaker 2: It was 2.45 for those playing at.
• 9:56
  Speaker 1: Home wow yeah they didn't make up any time in
• 9:58
  Speaker 1: the air.
• 9:58
  Speaker 2: And also I know sometimes I'm like please please please
• 10:01
  Speaker 2: they're like hey we decided.
• 10:02
  Speaker 1: To like put the boosters on we gained an hour
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: on the way to Kuala Lumpur the other day literally
• 10:08
  Speaker 1: they were like it's only going to be eight hours
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: instead of seven or whatever I mean instead of nine.
• 10:12
  Speaker 2: Can we just do that like normally you just speed.
• 10:14
  Speaker 1: Everything up pedal to the metal big guy get down.
• 10:16
  Speaker 2: But tell me what you think about this laura was
• 10:20
  Speaker 2: like what are you doing and i said i'm just
• 10:21
  Speaker 2: charging the ipads before we flew and she's like no
• 10:24
  Speaker 2: ipads and i was like what what for i was
• 10:28
  Speaker 2: like this is like ipad territory.
• 10:30
  Speaker 1: The airplane is you're in international air it doesn't what
• 10:33
  Speaker 1: your rules you should have turned around You don't make
• 10:37
  Speaker 1: the rules up there. The pilot does. The pilot says
• 10:39
  Speaker 1: it's fine.
• 10:39
  Speaker 2: And she was like, no, we're not going to do it.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: I was like.
• 10:44
  Speaker 2: Why are we making life harder for ourselves?
• 10:46
  Speaker 3: Facts.
• 10:47
  Speaker 2: My kids love them dearly. Do turn into little fuckwits
• 10:52
  Speaker 2: when they have the iPad. Sorry, kids.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: That's true.
• 10:55
  Speaker 2: It ruins them.
• 10:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but at least for that moment you get to
• 10:59
  Speaker 1: your destination. I'd much rather deal with a shithead kid
• 11:03
  Speaker 1: on land than in the air.
• 11:05
  Speaker 2: But she won the battle. Of course she won the battle.
• 11:08
  Speaker 1: You would never win in that.
• 11:09
  Speaker 2: Well, I'm strong.
• 11:11
  Speaker 6: I'm a strong boy.
• 11:13
  Speaker 2: I'm a strong boy. I can argue with my wife
• 11:15
  Speaker 2: and win it.
• 11:15
  Speaker 1: Sure you can. I believe you can.
• 11:18
  Speaker 3: Sorry, I didn't mean to laugh so loud.
• 11:21
  Speaker 1: You should have wrote this on the bottom of Dave Hughes.
• 11:23
  Speaker 2: Guys, I'm feeling very fragile.
• 11:23
  Speaker 1: You should have put that on the bottom of Dave Hughes' post.
• 11:25
  Speaker 2: After being attacked on Dave Hughes' post.
• 11:27
  Speaker 1: You should have wrote that on there. I can stand
• 11:29
  Speaker 1: up to my wife and people will be like, oh,
• 11:31
  Speaker 1: this is funny. No, I'm just kidding. Wow. She won.
• 11:35
  Speaker 1: Move on.
• 11:36
  Speaker 2: So no iPad. But, yeah, Magnetica Island, no daylight savings.
• 11:40
  Speaker 1: Whoa, whoa, whoa. She won. What did they do on
• 11:44
  Speaker 1: the plane instead?
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: They fought.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: There you go. So you should have won that argument.
• 11:50
  Speaker 2: We did some colouring in. I actually bought Marley a book.
• 11:54
  Speaker 1: I bought her an iPad at the airport.
• 11:57
  Speaker 2: And she read the book and actually it wasn't too bad. Okay.
• 12:02
  Speaker 1: Well, they are getting older.
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 12:04
  Speaker 1: She's still young. It was all right.
• 12:08
  Speaker 2: I still think iPad on a plane.
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: Oh, for sure. I'm backing you. I'm going to put
• 12:11
  Speaker 1: it on a T-shirt.
• 12:12
  Speaker 2: But maybe like don't put this out there in case
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: Laura sees this chat and then she gets angry at me.
• 12:16
  Speaker 1: No, put it out there.
• 12:17
  Speaker 3: Oh, that was going to be a social clip.
• 12:18
  Speaker 2: I'm joking.
• 12:19
  Speaker 1: Do it. Fuck her. Yeah, do it.
• 12:20
  Speaker 2: Let's double down. I've got nothing to lose.
• 12:22
  Speaker 1: Double down.
• 12:23
  Speaker 2: All the Dave Hughes supporters alike.
• 12:25
  Speaker 3: Except your wife.
• 12:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's the one person who liked that comment.
• 12:29
  Speaker 1: Now she's unliked it.
• 12:31
  Speaker 2: I liked it myself.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: Oh.
• 12:33
  Speaker 2: Was it bad? I don't know.
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: It wasn't too bad this year. Like I feel like
• 12:39
  Speaker 1: because there's no naps and stuff involved anymore in my house,
• 12:42
  Speaker 1: it's more just like are they going to sleep later
• 12:45
  Speaker 1: and they were up late that night because the footy
• 12:48
  Speaker 1: was on anyway. So it was sort of like sort
• 12:51
  Speaker 1: of panned out this year. What about you?
• 12:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, Vic, how are you?
• 12:55
  Speaker 3: Well, we got confused. We thought Lily was sick because
• 12:58
  Speaker 3: she woke.
• 12:59
  Speaker 5: Up that morning and was like, I'm really tired, I
• 13:00
  Speaker 5: want to go back to bed, and she was a
• 13:02
  Speaker 5: bit sniffly so I was like, Okay, go have a nap.
• 13:04
  Speaker 3: Sure, like get out of my hair.
• 13:05
  Speaker 2: You're just jet lagged.
• 13:06
  Speaker 5: And then she slept for like two hours. I took
• 13:09
  Speaker 5: Louis down to the beach and then I called Dan
• 13:11
  Speaker 5: and he's like, oh, yeah, she's still asleep. I'm like,
• 13:12
  Speaker 5: can you wake her up, please? This was at like
• 13:15
  Speaker 5: one o'clock. She'd been asleep for three hours.
• 13:16
  Speaker 2: She's a non-napper now? Non-napper?
• 13:18
  Speaker 5: Non-napper, but we do like to give her the occasional
• 13:21
  Speaker 5: nap if she's a bit run down. And we just
• 13:23
  Speaker 5: had like big drive back and everything. So we thought maybe.
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: She's a bit sick. Did she do a lot of
• 13:27
  Speaker 1: the driving, did she? Yeah.
• 13:28
  Speaker 2: Very good.
• 13:29
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 13:29
  Speaker 3: No, but it takes it out of them.
• 13:32
  Speaker 1: Did you find that funny at all? No.
• 13:36
  Speaker 2: Ash, she's a child.
• 13:38
  Speaker 1: That's why it's a joke. Okay.
• 13:40
  Speaker 2: See how I back you up? I got your back.
• 13:43
  Speaker 1: You should go back to 2022. When you make bad.
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: Jokes, I'm always there in your corner. You should go back. Go, Ash,
• 13:48
  Speaker 2: you can do it.
• 13:49
  Speaker 1: You should go back to– I don't make bad jokes.
• 13:51
  Speaker 1: You should go back to 2022 and think about that haircut.
• 13:53
  Speaker 1: Don't laugh at that, Vic.
• 13:54
  Speaker 2: Oh, okay.
• 13:58
  Speaker 1: You can laugh if it's funny. Exhibit A.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: So she didn't try.
• 14:01
  Speaker 1: So that's how it's done.
• 14:03
  Speaker 6: Okay, why don't you do it?
• 14:08
  Speaker 1: Can you put it in the brief at the top
• 14:10
  Speaker 1: and be like, jokes make people laugh.
• 14:11
  Speaker 2: Can we pick this up after the recording?
• 14:15
  Speaker 1: I'll give you an hour. I'll give you an hour
• 14:17
  Speaker 1: of my time to teach you how to be funny.
• 14:18
  Speaker 1: Thank you.
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: Vic, continue.
• 14:21
  Speaker 3: Oh, man, I'm sweating and crying at the same time.
• 14:24
  Speaker 1: It's not that sad.
• 14:27
  Speaker 3: What was I even saying?
• 14:29
  Speaker 6: Lily.
• 14:30
  Speaker 5: So that night Grand Final was on and I was
• 14:32
  Speaker 5: watching it by myself and then she comes out and
• 14:35
  Speaker 5: she's like, I'm still hungry.
• 14:36
  Speaker 3: And this was at like 8.30?
• 14:38
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it was second hour. I remember you messaging.
• 14:41
  Speaker 2: An hour time difference. The kids don't fucking know what
• 14:44
  Speaker 2: day it is.
• 14:45
  Speaker 3: I think it was because.
• 14:46
  Speaker 5: She had slept so long in the morning and so
• 14:48
  Speaker 5: then we had a second dinner. She got ice cream
• 14:50
  Speaker 5: this time because she'd missed out.
• 14:52
  Speaker 2: What? Vic doing the ice cream? Normally you give the
• 14:54
  Speaker 2: kids like a banana.
• 14:55
  Speaker 1: You'd shame us if we did that.
• 14:56
  Speaker 2: You'd shame us.
• 14:57
  Speaker 1: You'd shame me for doing that.
• 14:58
  Speaker 2: You gave her sugar at that hour of the night? Wow.
• 15:00
  Speaker 1: How dare you? Matt's feeling a bit. He needs to
• 15:03
  Speaker 1: get on top because of the joke thing. He's like, please,
• 15:07
  Speaker 1: let me back in the club.
• 15:08
  Speaker 2: I'm at the bottom of the run here.
• 15:10
  Speaker 1: You'll come back up. You'll come out quick, I reckon.
• 15:13
  Speaker 5: But, yeah, it was a nightmare and she eventually did
• 15:15
  Speaker 5: go to sleep. But I missed most of the game
• 15:17
  Speaker 5: because I was lying with her.
• 15:18
  Speaker 1: My thoughts and prayers out to parents with younger kids
• 15:21
  Speaker 1: who are still going through nap time and everything has
• 15:22
  Speaker 1: to shift an hour.
• 15:23
  Speaker 2: Well said.
• 15:24
  Speaker 1: I remember April, she was an EA as a profession,
• 15:27
  Speaker 1: but she's so like punctual with things. It's actually irritating.
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: But I love you.
• 15:32
  Speaker 1: Happy anniversary.
• 15:33
  Speaker 2: She's the type of person that changes the clock on
• 15:35
  Speaker 2: the car.
• 15:36
  Speaker 1: Oh, good question. No, but yeah. No, actually I was
• 15:39
  Speaker 1: in her car. I took her car last night to
• 15:42
  Speaker 1: fill it up, give it a quick wash and do
• 15:44
  Speaker 1: the washer fill because I'm away for a week. And
• 15:46
  Speaker 1: she's anxious at the petrol station now because it's a
• 15:49
  Speaker 1: diesel car and she had to learn all about diesel
• 15:51
  Speaker 1: and petrol is different. But, you know, there's that little
• 15:53
  Speaker 1: clip at the diesel bowser. It's a little clip. It's
• 15:56
  Speaker 1: to stop you from putting petrol in your car. So
• 15:58
  Speaker 1: you've got to press a button, but you've got to
• 16:00
  Speaker 1: put it back on properly. She got yelled at by
• 16:02
  Speaker 1: the guy through the speaker. I don't think she got
• 16:04
  Speaker 1: yelled at. I think it was like, excuse me, please
• 16:07
  Speaker 1: make sure that you put the... And she's like, I'm
• 16:10
  Speaker 1: never going back to a petrol station ever again. So
• 16:13
  Speaker 1: now I already would do it anyway. Whenever I'm in
• 16:16
  Speaker 1: the car, I'm like, it's a blue job to fill
• 16:18
  Speaker 1: your cars up with petrol as far as I can see.
• 16:20
  Speaker 1: So I would do it anyway, but now it's like,
• 16:23
  Speaker 1: sometimes I just use it. I'd be like, ah, I
• 16:25
  Speaker 1: don't have time. You're going to have to do it.
• 16:26
  Speaker 1: She's like, oh my God. Oh my God. No. And just,
• 16:29
  Speaker 1: just to stress her out.
• 16:30
  Speaker 2: I see her in Bondo.
• 16:31
  Speaker 1: I'm like, what are you doing?
• 16:32
  Speaker 2: And she's like, I'm just filling up.
• 16:33
  Speaker 1: Don't yell at me over here. Anyway, I haven't checked
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: the clocks. That's what I was.
• 16:39
  Speaker 2: Trying to say.
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: I bet she would.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: Can I quickly just give a shout out? I don't
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: know her name, but I was saved by an angel.
• 16:48
  Speaker 2: So going back to Magnetic Island, I'm pretty good with timings.
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: Like I'm like, okay, the flight leaves at this hour,
• 16:55
  Speaker 2: get there an hour before, takes 40 minutes to get
• 16:57
  Speaker 2: to the airport.
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: Let me hold you up right there. And Vic, I
• 17:00
  Speaker 1: want to just get your attention really quick. Matt just said,
• 17:04
  Speaker 1: I'm really good with timings. What do we feel about that?
• 17:07
  Speaker 2: When it comes to the airport, when it comes to
• 17:10
  Speaker 2: the airport.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: If there's a chance that a business class flyer is
• 17:12
  Speaker 1: there before they open.
• 17:14
  Speaker 2: For the record, I appreciate.
• 17:16
  Speaker 1: So we're not as important.
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: I am often the third person. I will do better.
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: I'm often the last one in the room. I acknowledge that.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: But airports are a different kettle of fish.
• 17:25
  Speaker 1: Okay, go on.
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: When it's the risk of missing a flight, that's when
• 17:29
  Speaker 2: I kick into gear.
• 17:30
  Speaker 1: We have been, both of us, together. Every time we
• 17:34
  Speaker 1: do fly together, they have to call over the speaker
• 17:35
  Speaker 1: for us. Because we're shooting shit and talking shit.
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: No, that's you.
• 17:38
  Speaker 1: No, that's you. Okay.
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: It's both of us. Both of us.
• 17:42
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 17:43
  Speaker 3: You love to talk. That's why we have a podcast.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: Correct.
• 17:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we don't talk on the plane because he falls
• 17:48
  Speaker 1: asleep immediately. So we've got to do the talking.
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: Guilty. The rocking just gets to me. So I mapped
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: out the time. We had a 6.45 flight.
• 17:56
  Speaker 3: AM.
• 17:57
  Speaker 1: Correct. Very good.
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: Mapped it out. I was like, okay, I can get
• 18:00
  Speaker 2: there this time. I didn't realize there was a strike
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: on at Sydney Airport.
• 18:05
  Speaker 1: A strike for what?
• 18:06
  Speaker 2: The workers are striking. I did see that. Good on them.
• 18:10
  Speaker 2: Power to the people asking for more money. They just
• 18:12
  Speaker 2: don't strike when I'm flying.
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: Fully. It's school holidays. Honestly, they just keep, do you
• 18:16
  Speaker 1: know who keeps striking? The train people. So they're like,
• 18:19
  Speaker 1: if the train people could do it, then the plane
• 18:21
  Speaker 1: people are onto it too.
• 18:22
  Speaker 2: We're doing it as well. The train people are always striking.
• 18:24
  Speaker 2: Shout out to, again, the working class out there and
• 18:27
  Speaker 2: fighting for more money as they should.
• 18:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but just don't do it when we're drunk. Thank you.
• 18:32
  Speaker 2: So- As we turn into Sydney Airport, if everyone's not familiar,
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: there's like one set of lights, the last one you
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: then turn in and normally that last set of lights,
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: normally it takes like what, two minutes, right? From that
• 18:42
  Speaker 2: last set of lights you turn in to get to departures.
• 18:44
  Speaker 1: It's quite an awkward one. It depends on traffic. It's
• 18:47
  Speaker 1: quite awkward. I know what you're talking about. It's like
• 18:49
  Speaker 1: a left turn off.
• 18:50
  Speaker 2: So that normally takes two minutes. It took me 20
• 18:53
  Speaker 2: minutes of traffic because it was so banked up.
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: It was so busy. Yeah, I run the risk and
• 18:57
  Speaker 1: I always say to April, I'm like, I'm going to
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: go to the front and just see if there's a
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: weak link in the line who doesn't see the person
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: pulling in front. And then every time I do it,
• 19:05
  Speaker 1: I'm like, you better jerk your panties.
• 19:07
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God.
• 19:08
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 19:10
  Speaker 2: Vic, we'll take that out.
• 19:12
  Speaker 5: Why?
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: It's hot. It's a hot move. She's always like, oh,
• 19:15
  Speaker 1: my hero.
• 19:16
  Speaker 3: Oh, I thought you meant because she's wet her pants,
• 19:18
  Speaker 3: she's so nervous.
• 19:19
  Speaker 1: No, no, no. It's so attractive. All right.
• 19:22
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: My lane change skills are second to none.
• 19:24
  Speaker 2: I bet they are.
• 19:25
  Speaker 3: I've been in the car with you.
• 19:26
  Speaker 1: They're very.
• 19:28
  Speaker 3: aggressive aggressive is.
• 19:29
  Speaker 2: A good word i'm racing so time is ticking and
• 19:32
  Speaker 2: i'm like fuck this this line ain't moving and we're
• 19:35
  Speaker 2: getting closer and closer had bag drop and i didn't
• 19:37
  Speaker 2: realize i thought it was 30 minutes before bag drop
• 19:40
  Speaker 2: cut off jet stars 40 minutes they've.
• 19:43
  Speaker 1: Added 10 more minutes i didn't know it's convenient for
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: them but it's inconvenient.
• 19:46
  Speaker 2: For you i'm like holy fuck so anyway finally get
• 19:49
  Speaker 2: in there and i'm like kids everyone just fucking run
• 19:51
  Speaker 2: right everyone just run.
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: What direction anyway it's like home alone and i'm like
• 19:59
  Speaker 1: leave puppy no time for her yeah the movies say
• 20:03
  Speaker 1: she'll be fine So we.
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: Get in there, we're waiting to the machines where you
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: get your bag tags. People are like lining up. This
• 20:10
  Speaker 2: little girl tries to push in front of me and
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: I'm like, what are you doing, mate? She goes, I'm
• 20:16
  Speaker 2: trying to get to my mum.
• 20:17
  Speaker 1: I'm sick. And I was like, carry on.
• 20:21
  Speaker 2: Tension in the air.
• 20:22
  Speaker 3: It's very tense.
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: Get my bag tags, go over to the machine and
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: then the fucking machine's like, incorrect bag tag. And I'm like, what?
• 20:31
  Speaker 1: Sir, you're at Woolies. Yeah.
• 20:34
  Speaker 2: And so I'm trying to do the machine. I'm in
• 20:35
  Speaker 2: the machine for 10 minutes. And this lady, I'm like,
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: excuse me, the machine's not registering my bag tags. And
• 20:41
  Speaker 2: she goes, I cannot help you, sir.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: And I said, damn it.
• 20:45
  Speaker 2: And then I try again and it goes, flight closed.
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: And I'm like, to the woman, I go, I'm so sorry.
• 20:51
  Speaker 2: It's now saying flight closed. And she goes, well, the
• 20:53
  Speaker 2: flight's closed.
• 20:53
  Speaker 1: That's because the people serving you at the Jetstar counter,
• 20:56
  Speaker 1: the people flying the plane, right?
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: There's no person. All they have now at Sydney Airport
• 21:01
  Speaker 2: is the machine and the bag drop. There's no like
• 21:03
  Speaker 2: check-in desk.
• 21:04
  Speaker 1: Nah, there's like one person wandering.
• 21:06
  Speaker 2: There's a wanderer.
• 21:07
  Speaker 3: There's never enough staff to help people.
• 21:09
  Speaker 2: Not enough staff.
• 21:09
  Speaker 3: Because the computers don't do what they're supposed to do.
• 21:12
  Speaker 1: What's annoying is that Jetstar is owned by Qantas. Qantas
• 21:15
  Speaker 1: is partially owned by the government.
• 21:17
  Speaker 2: Are they?
• 21:17
  Speaker 1: It's propped up by the government, hence why they didn't
• 21:19
  Speaker 1: go under during COVID. And shares were really low at
• 21:22
  Speaker 1: the time, so you could have bought in and made
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: a heap of money.
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: Anyway.
• 21:24
  Speaker 1: Is it? I could have made all that up and
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: you guys would not know the difference.
• 21:27
  Speaker 3: ANSET Australia used to be.
• 21:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, ANSET. And then that folded. Isn't that just
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: been now Qantas? Anyway. But, like, it's the government that
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: did this to you. That's what I'm getting at. It's
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: a long piece of string, but I found the end
• 21:42
  Speaker 1: of it and it's the government.
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, at the end of it it's like, ah, Albanese.
• 21:46
  Speaker 1: It's Dave Hughes.
• 21:47
  Speaker 6: He's just like, I don't know, I fly private.
• 21:51
  Speaker 5: Qantas was owned by the government several decades after being
• 21:54
  Speaker 5: fully nationalised in 1947.
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: So I was wrong on all accounts.
• 22:00
  Speaker 2: So this lady, I'm like, please help us. And she's like, no.
• 22:04
  Speaker 2: And then Laura got a little bit aggressive, which was
• 22:07
  Speaker 2: kind of hot. But she was like, please.
• 22:10
  Speaker 1: Oh, we'll take that out. We better take that out.
• 22:13
  Speaker 1: Nothing's getting by me today. Oh, okay. Got it.
• 22:16
  Speaker 5: Good.
• 22:17
  Speaker 2: We're having a good time? Everyone's enjoying themselves?
• 22:19
  Speaker 1: We are having a great time. Who are you talking to?
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: Laura's like, but we're here. We're checked in. We've got
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: the bag tags. And she's like, the flight's closed. There's
• 22:25
  Speaker 2: nothing we can do. And Laura's like, but we were
• 22:26
  Speaker 2: trying to get your help 10 minutes ago. She goes, well,
• 22:28
  Speaker 2: you should have got here earlier.
• 22:30
  Speaker 1: I was like.
• 22:31
  Speaker 2: I was like, I was like to the woman, I
• 22:34
  Speaker 2: was like, if I was you, I'd step away right now.
• 22:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah. That's what she was.
• 22:37
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: What, uh, can I just ask about the age of
• 22:41
  Speaker 1: said employee? Like in terms of like.
• 22:44
  Speaker 2: I think she was, no, she was, she was like
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: our age. We'll find with our own, with our own
• 22:47
  Speaker 2: people here.
• 22:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, I thought I was thinking, uh, maybe the previous
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: generation who just dropped.
• 22:52
  Speaker 2: It wasn't an oldie. It wasn't an oldie. And then
• 22:54
  Speaker 2: Laura's sister was already like past security. So she was like,
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: how are you guys going? And Laura's like, we're not
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: going to make it. There's only one flight as well
• 23:01
  Speaker 2: per day.
• 23:02
  Speaker 1: Is it direct to Magnolia? Direct.
• 23:03
  Speaker 2: No, to Townsville. One of those bloody northern countries, cities, whatever.
• 23:09
  Speaker 1: Unless they're winning a premiership that year. I don't even
• 23:11
  Speaker 1: know they exist.
• 23:12
  Speaker 2: Thank you.
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: I love you, though.
• 23:14
  Speaker 2: So I'm like, what do we do here, guys? What
• 23:16
  Speaker 2: do we do here? We've got the kids screaming. We've
• 23:18
  Speaker 2: got three kids. Three kids.
• 23:20
  Speaker 1: That's your fault.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: Three kids.
• 23:21
  Speaker 5: I would say that is one of the most high-stress
• 23:24
  Speaker 5: situations for a parent.
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: Dads at an airport need to be studied already.
• 23:27
  Speaker 2: And so Laura's there about to punch on with this woman,
• 23:30
  Speaker 2: about to wrestle her to the ground with a baby
• 23:31
  Speaker 2: strapped to her, and I'm like.
• 23:33
  Speaker 3: I would do the same.
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: Right now someone needs to step up.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: Someone needs an iPad. I got it. I secretly rang them.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: You are welcome. Job done. See, they do serve a purpose.
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: And I thought, there needs to be a hero. And
• 23:51
  Speaker 2: I looked at the airport, I scanned the room, and
• 23:53
  Speaker 2: I saw another wanderer, a Jetstar wanderer, I call her.
• 23:57
  Speaker 1: She's probably like on a smart go.
• 23:58
  Speaker 2: And she was actually helping out another couple. And I
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: kicked them out of the way.
• 24:02
  Speaker 1: And I was like.
• 24:03
  Speaker 2: I'm so sorry.
• 24:04
  Speaker 1: Do you know who I am? I'm father of the year.
• 24:07
  Speaker 2: She was like, you're the guy from Dave's comment section.
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh, fuck. And I was like, please,
• 24:12
  Speaker 2: we have children. Sometimes having kids is so beneficial.
• 24:15
  Speaker 3: And a baby.
• 24:16
  Speaker 2: And I was like, it's a one-year-old.
• 24:18
  Speaker 1: Look at her.
• 24:19
  Speaker 2: And I look over and Laura's got the Jetstar woman
• 24:21
  Speaker 2: in her headlock and I'm like, look, look what's happening.
• 24:23
  Speaker 2: And she goes, I don't know who this woman is.
• 24:25
  Speaker 2: I wish I had her name. And she goes, don't worry,
• 24:29
  Speaker 2: I've got you. And she goes, give me your bags.
• 24:34
  Speaker 2: I'm going to fucking run them to the plane. And
• 24:36
  Speaker 2: I was like, you can do that?
• 24:38
  Speaker 1: And she was like, I can.
• 24:39
  Speaker 2: Fucking watch me. For you, anything. And the other couple
• 24:42
  Speaker 2: were like, but what about us? She was like, fuck
• 24:44
  Speaker 2: you guys. You're out of here. And Laura's talking to
• 24:48
  Speaker 2: her sister and I go, hang up. We've got to run, baby.
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: And so then she goes, the security was fucking chockers
• 24:56
  Speaker 2: as well, buddy.
• 24:58
  Speaker 1: Did she have gastro too at one point?
• 25:00
  Speaker 2: Laura's shat herself. In the heat of the argument, Laura's
• 25:04
  Speaker 2: done a shit.
• 25:04
  Speaker 1: She's just, oh, just left it there.
• 25:07
  Speaker 2: And the lady at Jetstar goes, you just run to
• 25:09
  Speaker 2: the front of the security queue. She goes, just get
• 25:11
  Speaker 2: to the front. So I'm like, oh, fuck. Everyone's so
• 25:14
  Speaker 2: like agitated at the security queue. <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL> <HAL>.
• 25:20
  Speaker 1: <HAL> We tried this once before, Matt. Tried this once before.
• 25:23
  Speaker 1: We were late for a flight. Go figure.
• 25:25
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 25:25
  Speaker 1: And we were going through the same thing. And you
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: know how they have that side trail for, like, crew
• 25:29
  Speaker 1: and stuff? You're like, I'm going down there. And I'm like,
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: I'm not going because he's going to get pulled up.
• 25:33
  Speaker 2: I got pulled up.
• 25:34
  Speaker 1: He got pulled up. And I'm like, ooh, how embarrassing.
• 25:37
  Speaker 2: But when you have kids, it's one of those situations.
• 25:39
  Speaker 2: When you have kids, you can do whatever the fuck.
• 25:41
  Speaker 2: We joked about if you're robbing a bank with a
• 25:43
  Speaker 2: child on your hip, fine.
• 25:44
  Speaker 1: Fine, give him the money.
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: And so everyone was like, oh, you got kids. Please,
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: get in front, get in front. And then one guy
• 25:49
  Speaker 2: was like, I'm running late too. And I was just like, oh,
• 25:53
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to buy it back. I was like, Laura,
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: get him. So if you're that Jetstar employee, hopefully she's listening.
• 26:03
  Speaker 2: If you know her, she told you that she saved us,
• 26:06
  Speaker 2: I want to reach out to her.
• 26:08
  Speaker 1: Domestic, wasn't it?
• 26:09
  Speaker 2: Domestic.
• 26:10
  Speaker 1: I'm going to the airport tonight. I was like, I
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: might pop in and see if I can find.
• 26:13
  Speaker 2: When we came back, I was looking for the Wanderers.
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: The Jetstar Wanderers. Back upstairs to Departures? Where is she?
• 26:19
  Speaker 1: She wasn't there.
• 26:20
  Speaker 2: Wasn't there.
• 26:21
  Speaker 3: What a shame.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: Well, you know, like heroes, they're hidden in plain sight.
• 26:26
  Speaker 2: And Laura was like, how did you do it? And
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: I was like, you know, just whatever.
• 26:30
  Speaker 1: It just comes to me. In a time of panic,
• 26:33
  Speaker 1: it just comes to me.
• 26:34
  Speaker 2: It was all a bit of a blur.
• 26:36
  Speaker 3: It is in those situations.
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: And then you get on your seat and then we
• 26:40
  Speaker 2: fucking sat there on the tarmac for like an hour.
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: And on Magnetic Island you met a couple of donors.
• 26:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, shout out to Farron.
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: Is that his name?
• 26:48
  Speaker 3: Can I ask just on the airport thing?
• 26:50
  Speaker 2: Please.
• 26:51
  Speaker 3: How do you get to the airport?
• 26:52
  Speaker 2: I drive.
• 26:53
  Speaker 1: And park?
• 26:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, because it works out to be the same for parking.
• 26:56
  Speaker 2: Because we've got Poppy, you've got to get the bloody maxi.
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: Valet? Yes. Me too. Okay. Me too. Honestly, if I
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: can't afford business class, I'm getting a valet car park.
• 27:06
  Speaker 2: It's the best.
• 27:06
  Speaker 3: Well, it's actually a hack. So we get valet and
• 27:08
  Speaker 3: we can.
• 27:09
  Speaker 2: Not afford it.
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: Oh, it must be nice.
• 27:10
  Speaker 5: Oh, wow.
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: Better check how much we're paying Vic.
• 27:14
  Speaker 1: It's in the invoice.
• 27:17
  Speaker 2: Valet parking.
• 27:19
  Speaker 5: But when you put it in through the city parking thing,
• 27:22
  Speaker 5: it's just as cheap to go valet as like find
• 27:25
  Speaker 5: your own park. So we've started doing that and it's
• 27:27
  Speaker 5: the biggest parenting hack out there.
• 27:29
  Speaker 1: And if you sign up to their mailing list, you
• 27:31
  Speaker 1: get 20% off like every two weeks. Oh, that's a new,
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: anyone go to the hospital? Anyone go to the hospital? 20%
• 27:39
  Speaker 1: off surgeries. 20% off parking. No, that is great. April's
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: a member.
• 27:43
  Speaker 2: Should we take this out in case people start? Because
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: I feel like people are going to start doing it.
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: Doing what?
• 27:49
  Speaker 2: Booking valet.
• 27:50
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah. Yeah, why not?
• 27:51
  Speaker 2: Okay, all right, all right.
• 27:52
  Speaker 1: Book out. All right.
• 27:53
  Speaker 2: What? What do you mean? Because I always book the
• 27:54
  Speaker 2: valet parking like the night before.
• 27:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I booked it yesterday.
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Do they?
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: Actually, at the moment, save 20 for anyone out there.
• 28:04
  Speaker 1: Magnetic Island. Yeah. Yes.
• 28:05
  Speaker 2: And whilst I was there, I did meet a lovely
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: young man named Farron.
• 28:10
  Speaker 1: Is this the one that everyone really wants to go
• 28:12
  Speaker 1: on a date with?
• 28:13
  Speaker 2: Oh, no, that's Terry. One lady was like.
• 28:15
  Speaker 1: Terry.
• 28:16
  Speaker 2: I posted about it. And I think Leanne was like,
• 28:18
  Speaker 2: you wouldn't be able to hook us up with Terry,
• 28:19
  Speaker 2: would you?
• 28:20
  Speaker 1: Relax, Leanne. For sure.
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: Terry's Laura's dad, who lives on Magnetic Island.
• 28:26
  Speaker 1: Oh, so people know Terry.
• 28:27
  Speaker 2: People know Terry. Well, there's not many people. I think
• 28:29
  Speaker 2: the population of Magnetic Island is like a thousand. I
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: think that's it.
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: So he's got the pick of the birds.
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: Not many birds there, but, yeah, he can.
• 28:38
  Speaker 1: He's wily and charming. Yes. Okay. Yes.
• 28:42
  Speaker 2: But Farron was like, Matty J? And I was like,
• 28:45
  Speaker 2: turned around and be like, oh, who's this?
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: You should have just really fucked him. No, it's Ash, actually.
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: Really throw him off the scene.
• 28:50
  Speaker 2: You do that.
• 28:50
  Speaker 3: That's what Ash does.
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: That's what I do. I always say.
• 28:53
  Speaker 2: Can I just, was that a joke?
• 28:55
  Speaker 1: No.
• 28:56
  Speaker 3: No, he actually does it when he picked up this
• 28:58
  Speaker 3: table that you're sitting at.
• 28:59
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 29:00
  Speaker 1: I always say when I leave a coffee order, I'm like,
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: Matty J.
• 29:03
  Speaker 2: We do look pretty similar, to be honest.
• 29:04
  Speaker 1: No, I just do it because it's fun.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: But we also have, like, we've morphed into the same person.
• 29:08
  Speaker 1: You've morphed into me.
• 29:10
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 29:12
  Speaker 3: Do you get that a lot, though? Do people always say?
• 29:14
  Speaker 2: No, no, I fucking love it. People are like, it
• 29:16
  Speaker 2: must be annoying. And I'm like, no, it's fucking.
• 29:18
  Speaker 1: People always say to me, oh, I thought you were taller.
• 29:22
  Speaker 2: You're a big boy.
• 29:23
  Speaker 1: I have to stand on a sandbag every time we
• 29:25
  Speaker 1: do a photo shoot. That's not fun.
• 29:27
  Speaker 2: So Farron and Maxie, I think, was his kid's name.
• 29:30
  Speaker 2: And he was like, no, listen, because. I don't have
• 29:32
  Speaker 2: many male supporters, I'll be honest. It's normally Leanne.
• 29:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you want Leanne. I prefer Leanne. It's the 50-year-old
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: mums who are like. like, I love you.
• 29:40
  Speaker 2: I love Matty John.
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: Followed you from day one.
• 29:42
  Speaker 2: So I was like, I asked him for a photo.
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: I was like.
• 29:48
  Speaker 1: Yes, you can have a photo with me.
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: I was like, can I take a pic? And he
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: was like, oh, God.
• 29:53
  Speaker 1: This happens all the time. He was like, this is embarrassing.
• 29:57
  Speaker 2: And I ran home. He was like, Laura, you'll never
• 29:58
  Speaker 2: guess what happened.
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: I met someone in the wild. He didn't run home.
• 30:00
  Speaker 3: He skipped home.
• 30:01
  Speaker 1: I know.
• 30:03
  Speaker 2: I fucking did.
• 30:03
  Speaker 1: I did.
• 30:05
  Speaker 2: And then to Terry, who he's ex-military. I was like, Terry,
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: you'll never believe what happened. He was like, oh, fucking hell.
• 30:10
  Speaker 2: Here he is again, guys.
• 30:15
  Speaker 1: Anyway, so Terry, nice guy.
• 30:16
  Speaker 5: Dota?
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: Any Dutch friends out there?
• 30:19
  Speaker 2: I don't think he knows what podcasting is. So he
• 30:23
  Speaker 2: was a bit confused as to what I do as
• 30:26
  Speaker 2: a job. But it was nice to see Terry.
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: Good to see him. Good to hear. I'm jealous, actually.
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: I want to go to Magnetic Island or somewhere up there.
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: You can't swim, though.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: No, you can. You can?
• 30:37
  Speaker 4: Yeah.
• 30:37
  Speaker 2: Yeah. They do have.
• 30:39
  Speaker 3: Depends on what time of year.
• 30:41
  Speaker 2: They do get the season of jellyfish.
• 30:43
  Speaker 1: Would you risk it, though, out of season? Because they've
• 30:45
  Speaker 1: been found as low as. What, Lismore?
• 30:47
  Speaker 3: You can suit up.
• 30:48
  Speaker 1: Oh, I don't know why I said Lismore. That's inland.
• 30:50
  Speaker 1: There's heaps of jellyfish out there.
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: But I was like, uh-huh, yeah, Lismore is very good.
• 30:55
  Speaker 2: Walking down the street, they're like, oh, they're here, the jellyfish.
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: They're just like Rastafarians.
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: Yeah, man. Lots of swagger. No, you can swim. You
• 31:06
  Speaker 2: can swim. Sometimes there are sharks, but I swam. There's
• 31:10
  Speaker 2: sharks in Bondi. Hey, whoa. You leave Bondi.
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: I don't think she's Bondi in that.
• 31:14
  Speaker 3: There's sharks everywhere. Did you see the shark drone?
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: Yes. No.
• 31:19
  Speaker 3: There was seven sharks. in these swimmers surfers in bondi
• 31:22
  Speaker 3: on the weekend.
• 31:23
  Speaker 2: They're there i told you this i think they've always
• 31:25
  Speaker 2: been there it's just now the drone guy's just a
• 31:27
  Speaker 2: bit of a pervert and you can't leave them alone.
• 31:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah he's like taking up skirts of sharks yeah it's
• 31:32
  Speaker 1: such good he's like he's like got the best photo
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: of this shark's penis.
• 31:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah okay chill to be honest the drone the drone
• 31:39
  Speaker 2: the drone guy's a bit of a creep he needs
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: to like relax with the shark pics yeah.
• 31:43
  Speaker 1: He's like look at the hole on that one that's
• 31:45
  Speaker 1: dolphin sorry that's dolphin i He's like, I don't want
• 31:47
  Speaker 1: to see that dolphin's hole. Okay, let's move on.
• 31:49
  Speaker 2: Speaking of donors.
• 31:50
  Speaker 1: We could sit on this for ages.
• 31:52
  Speaker 3: There's been a lot of international donors come out of
• 31:54
  Speaker 3: the woodworks.
• 31:54
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, a little Dutchie.
• 31:55
  Speaker 1: How do they understand?
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: I wrote back to her.
• 31:58
  Speaker 1: Can you translate? I don't know that. Have you been
• 32:03
  Speaker 1: to Amsterdam? No, I've never been. You stoner. I'd love
• 32:06
  Speaker 1: to go.
• 32:08
  Speaker 2: What did I write back to her? I said, bedankt
• 32:11
  Speaker 2: voor het luisteren.
• 32:13
  Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, okay, yeah. I know exactly what you're saying.
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: Thanks for listening in Dutch.
• 32:17
  Speaker 3: Oh, that's nice.
• 32:17
  Speaker 2: She didn't write back.
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: Did you type it with your hands?
• 32:21
  Speaker 2: Very good.
• 32:22
  Speaker 5: But then our inbox was flooded with Dutchies saying, hey,
• 32:25
  Speaker 5: and I was.
• 32:25
  Speaker 1: Like, you guys should all meet up. Define flooded.
• 32:28
  Speaker 2: Three people.
• 32:31
  Speaker 1: More than like Matt's comment.
• 32:32
  Speaker 3: More than five.
• 32:33
  Speaker 1: More than five.
• 32:34
  Speaker 3: And then the Germans, Canadians, heaps came out.
• 32:37
  Speaker 2: The Germans?
• 32:38
  Speaker 3: The Germans.
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: Hey, if you're German, wask it up. Wask it up.
• 32:42
  Speaker 2: What's that? Mein Bruder.
• 32:44
  Speaker 1: What about Dankeschön, Schlumpa. Can ich es haben? That means.
• 32:48
  Speaker 2: It's thank you something, something, something.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: Thank you, ma'am. Now can I please have some ice cream? Oh.
• 32:52
  Speaker 1: I think it's thank you, slut. Can I please have
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: some ice cream? I don't know. Why do we always
• 32:55
  Speaker 1: know the dirty words?
• 32:57
  Speaker 3: That's not dirty.
• 32:58
  Speaker 2: That's rude. Wie kann ich einen helfen?
• 33:00
  Speaker 1: Cut that out. All right, moving on. Are we still in?
• 33:04
  Speaker 1: Is this housekeeping?
• 33:04
  Speaker 2: I don't know.
• 33:05
  Speaker 1: Matt, it's Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Is it?
• 33:07
  Speaker 5: There you go.
• 33:08
  Speaker 1: October. All of October. October long.
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: May I ask, are we telling women to get checked?
• 33:15
  Speaker 3: To check their breasts.
• 33:16
  Speaker 2: To check their breasts.
• 33:17
  Speaker 1: Check your breasts.
• 33:19
  Speaker 3: Yeah, which is very easy to do. Just do it.
• 33:22
  Speaker 3: I can see you guys like it.
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to make a joke.
• 33:26
  Speaker 1: If you don't want to check your breasts.
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: Don't, don't, don't, don't say that.
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: Get a doctor to check them for you. A GP,
• 33:33
  Speaker 1: your GP.
• 33:34
  Speaker 5: Or a partner.
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: Or a partner.
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: Do you check your breasts? Sorry.
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: This is serious.
• 33:40
  Speaker 3: You really struggled with it.
• 33:40
  Speaker 1: This is serious.
• 33:41
  Speaker 3: I actually don't do it as much as I should,
• 33:43
  Speaker 3: but you should do it every single month.
• 33:45
  Speaker 2: Just what?
• 33:45
  Speaker 1: Like properly.
• 33:45
  Speaker 3: You need to like really check.
• 33:48
  Speaker 5: No, no, because it's actually four quadrants make up the breast.
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: I've always said the breasts had more than one quadrant.
• 33:55
  Speaker 2: What's your favorite quadrant?
• 33:56
  Speaker 1: I like all four or eight.
• 33:59
  Speaker 5: So it's really easy to feel if there's a lump
• 34:01
  Speaker 5: or a bump in the main bit, but if you
• 34:03
  Speaker 5: check around the sides as well, that's also part of
• 34:05
  Speaker 5: the breast.
• 34:06
  Speaker 1: Yes, don't get confused with ribs.
• 34:08
  Speaker 2: Yeah. My uncle actually had breast cancer.
• 34:10
  Speaker 1: It's very common in men.
• 34:11
  Speaker 5: Oh, wow.
• 34:13
  Speaker 1: So men, check your breasts as well. Well, guys, men
• 34:17
  Speaker 1: have breasts as well.
• 34:18
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: And boobs. Check your boobs.
• 34:21
  Speaker 2: Get checked.
• 34:22
  Speaker 3: Very good.
• 34:22
  Speaker 1: Okay, moving on. Thank you. Speaking of breast, Matt, last
• 34:26
  Speaker 1: week we were talking about how women get more cuddles
• 34:28
  Speaker 1: because they don't have stubble. And then we also came
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: to the conclusion they also have breasts.
• 34:32
  Speaker 2: Correct.
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: And it is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, so make sure
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: you love ones. Check your breasts. But I stumbled across
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: something that I want to show you that I thought
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: would be fitting, if you don't mind. Please. Is it breasts?
• 34:45
  Speaker 3: Oh, yeah.
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: You can read it out to the audience.
• 34:47
  Speaker 2: Inventor creates a unique pillow designed to help people feel
• 34:50
  Speaker 2: calm and relaxed. It's just a pair of boobs.
• 34:54
  Speaker 1: It's a pillow shaped as a pair of breasts. Thoughts?
• 34:57
  Speaker 3: And actually someone in the comments said, does it really
• 34:59
  Speaker 3: need the nipples?
• 35:00
  Speaker 1: Yes.
• 35:01
  Speaker 2: And that got 20,000 likes? Oh, for God's sake. Can't
• 35:05
  Speaker 2: fucking do it. You don't know what people will laugh at.
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: You should copy and paste that comment and put it
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: into Dave's and be like, are the nipples necessary? Just
• 35:13
  Speaker 1: to see what happens. But yeah, do you like it?
• 35:15
  Speaker 2: Do you know what? Can I just say there has
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: been an influx of products that are like, it's like
• 35:21
  Speaker 2: the old Dano's Direct TV ads where, you know, it
• 35:24
  Speaker 2: used to get all, like our parents used to get
• 35:26
  Speaker 2: sucked in and be like, do you need help chopping
• 35:28
  Speaker 2: your veggies? It's like that, but the modern day version
• 35:31
  Speaker 2: is social media ads where it's all AI.
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: And I accidentally swipe on it and then all of
• 35:36
  Speaker 1: a sudden I'm at a website that has like every
• 35:38
  Speaker 1: single 3D printed thing imaginable to man.
• 35:41
  Speaker 2: I get sucked in. I'm like, oh, that's pretty good.
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: I could use a set of breasts.
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 35:45
  Speaker 3: Well, when you sent it to me, I thought it
• 35:47
  Speaker 3: was AI or fake, so I checked it and it.
• 35:49
  Speaker 1: Actually is legit. It's legit.
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: Guys, can we buy one?
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I've got one.
• 35:53
  Speaker 2: For the office.
• 35:54
  Speaker 3: Well, I would say get two then.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: We can share.
• 35:57
  Speaker 2: We can share.
• 35:57
  Speaker 1: One breast each. I'll take four quadrants and you take
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: the other four.
• 36:00
  Speaker 2: Yeah, great. Can we please?
• 36:02
  Speaker 5: Yes.
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: The answer is yes.
• 36:04
  Speaker 6: Great.
• 36:04
  Speaker 1: What colour do you want?
• 36:06
  Speaker 2: There's options?
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: I don't know. Why don't we make two doting dad's
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: breast pillows?
• 36:11
  Speaker 2: I'm not going to stop you if you want to
• 36:13
  Speaker 2: do that.
• 36:14
  Speaker 1: Consider it done.
• 36:14
  Speaker 3: Add it to the list.
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: 2050, you'll be ready. Hey, Vic, you have got a
• 36:19
  Speaker 1: competition for the doters out there.
• 36:21
  Speaker 5: Yeah, this is an exciting one, actually. So if you
• 36:23
  Speaker 5: have a best friend who you would love to have
• 36:25
  Speaker 5: a photo shoot with, you can actually win a photo shoot.
• 36:29
  Speaker 5: And it's all inspired by the photo shoot that we
• 36:31
  Speaker 5: did down on the beach in Ulladulla, which everyone just loved.
• 36:34
  Speaker 3: 1.4 million.
• 36:37
  Speaker 5: I think it's gotten even higher than that now.
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: Is this the one where Matt was having a great
• 36:41
  Speaker 1: time and it looked like I didn't want to be there?
• 36:42
  Speaker 3: There were some photos you looked happy.
• 36:45
  Speaker 2: The one where you're on my back, you're very happy.
• 36:47
  Speaker 2: I'm giving you a big piggyback.
• 36:48
  Speaker 1: You'd be happy too if you didn't have to walk anymore.
• 36:51
  Speaker 3: That's Lily every day.
• 36:54
  Speaker 5: But Movember has jumped on board and they are offering
• 36:57
  Speaker 5: a free shoot with me wherever you are in Australia.
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: Oh, God.
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: So we're going to lose you to, unless you're in Perth. Yeah.
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: Because you know how we feel about you.
• 37:06
  Speaker 2: Love, we love the Perthies. Shout out to the Perthies.
• 37:09
  Speaker 5: All you have to do to enter is DM at
• 37:13
  Speaker 5: MovemberAU with your bromance story, sharing how a mate has
• 37:17
  Speaker 5: supported you through life. They're looking for stories that celebrate
• 37:20
  Speaker 5: male friendship, showing up for each other and being a
• 37:22
  Speaker 5: bloody good mate.
• 37:23
  Speaker 3: Having a great moustache is also a bonus.
• 37:26
  Speaker 1: Wow.
• 37:26
  Speaker 2: Can we enter again?
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: We can.
• 37:28
  Speaker 2: I will. Imagine if we won, Vic, and we're like, hey.
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: Also, congratulations to you, Vic, for you've made this come
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: to life off the back of a photo shoot that
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: we were just mucking around. So congratulations to you and
• 37:38
  Speaker 1: well done.
• 37:39
  Speaker 5: Well, it's really congratulations to you guys because they've just
• 37:41
  Speaker 5: seen those photos. Thank you.
• 37:42
  Speaker 2: I'll take it. We're just all jerking each other off here.
• 37:46
  Speaker 2: One big jerk circle. This is great.
• 37:49
  Speaker 1: Circle jerk is the correct term, Matt.
• 37:51
  Speaker 5: But the images from that photo shoot will also be
• 37:54
  Speaker 5: used in the Movember campaign. So your photos with your
• 37:56
  Speaker 5: friends could end up on billboards as well, which is
• 37:59
  Speaker 5: very exciting.
• 37:59
  Speaker 2: Do we have any update on our billboard?
• 38:01
  Speaker 3: It's in the process.
• 38:03
  Speaker 1: They haven't found the bus shelter they want to put
• 38:05
  Speaker 1: it on yet. LAUGHTER Literally.
• 38:09
  Speaker 5: I did tell them that you guys do want to
• 38:10
  Speaker 5: get a photo with it when it does happen.
• 38:13
  Speaker 3: So they're like, ooh, let's get it somewhere good.
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, there's one above us. Yeah. I want that one.
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: You should. You'd say, hey, just so you know.
• 38:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, my God, imagine if we were on the building.
• 38:22
  Speaker 1: That would be amazing. The whole building.
• 38:23
  Speaker 3: But the giveaway is open to men.
• 38:26
  Speaker 5: Women can nominate a man for it, but the photo
• 38:29
  Speaker 5: shoot is for two male friends.
• 38:31
  Speaker 2: Romance.
• 38:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 38:32
  Speaker 5: So keeping with the focus on celebrating male friendship and
• 38:35
  Speaker 5: just mates who show up for each other like you guys.
• 38:37
  Speaker 1: Very good. I think it's a great initiative and well done, Vic.
• 38:41
  Speaker 1: Good stuff. Good, good, good stuff. Now, while I've got you,
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: do you mind giving us some breaking news?
• 38:45
  Speaker 5: I do have some very good breaking news today, actually,
• 38:48
  Speaker 5: and I would love your thoughts on it. So the
• 38:50
  Speaker 5: contraceptive pill for men could be on shelves by 2031.
• 38:55
  Speaker 5: So new contraceptive options for men could be on the
• 38:58
  Speaker 5: market within the next few years, according to the World
• 39:01
  Speaker 5: Health Organization. Several hormonal and non-hormonal methods are already being
• 39:05
  Speaker 5: tested in clinical trials, with the WHO now setting out
• 39:08
  Speaker 5: what it wants future products to look like.
• 39:10
  Speaker 3: What do you think about that?
• 39:12
  Speaker 1: I left a comment. Would you like to know what
• 39:13
  Speaker 1: my comment was? Please. I wrote, just get a vasectomy,
• 39:16
  Speaker 1: you cowards. That's what I wrote.
• 39:18
  Speaker 2: That's fucking good. See?
• 39:20
  Speaker 1: That's what you call a joke.
• 39:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah. No, it's more of a statement.
• 39:23
  Speaker 1: A statement, yes. It's factual. It's factual.
• 39:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 39:26
  Speaker 1: How did it go?
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: Did you get any hate?
• 39:28
  Speaker 1: I honestly have so many viral comments. that I don't
• 39:30
  Speaker 1: know where to start.
• 39:30
  Speaker 2: Oh, God, he's arrogant.
• 39:32
  Speaker 5: Hmm.
• 39:33
  Speaker 1: I don't know. I actually forgot.
• 39:34
  Speaker 2: We've had a pretty good run, men, haven't we?
• 39:38
  Speaker 1: Yes. Look, we have it pretty easy.
• 39:40
  Speaker 2: We have had to put up with condoms.
• 39:42
  Speaker 1: It's not.
• 39:43
  Speaker 3: So do we.
• 39:43
  Speaker 2: That's a joke.
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: Fuck.
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.
• 39:46
  Speaker 1: Actually, so do we, yeah. A lot of the load,
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: if you will.
• 39:52
  Speaker 2: Harden the pun.
• 39:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, is carried by mum. That whole sentence sounded terrible.
• 39:57
  Speaker 1: So take that out.
• 39:58
  Speaker 3: That's staying in.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: I think we have had it easy for a long time.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: The least we could do is snip it. It's not
• 40:06
  Speaker 1: that hard.
• 40:07
  Speaker 3: But what if you still want kids?
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Let's turn back the clock. Turn back the clock here.
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: We're now seven years earlier. Before you've had kids, before
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: you've had a vasectomy, you don't want to have kids,
• 40:18
  Speaker 2: would you take the pill?
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: If I don't want to have kids?
• 40:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not ready for kids.
• 40:23
  Speaker 3: You do want them in the future.
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: If my wife said to me, hey, look, I've been
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: on the pill, like, There's obviously time before me that
• 40:29
  Speaker 1: she was on the pill. It wasn't just all me
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: who told her to be on the pill, okay? So
• 40:33
  Speaker 1: if it came up.
• 40:34
  Speaker 2: So defensive.
• 40:38
  Speaker 1: It wasn't me. Okay. She wanted to stick them up.
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: I'm not going down for this.
• 40:47
  Speaker 2: Anyway, look, if she said to me, look, I'm sweating
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: over there.
• 40:51
  Speaker 1: I don't want to get in trouble. I would. I'd
• 40:54
  Speaker 1: take the pill, yeah, for sure. I'd take it.
• 40:56
  Speaker 2: Very high pitch. Not.
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: No, I would. And I think it's the least we
• 41:00
  Speaker 1: could do. Thank you.
• 41:01
  Speaker 3: What would you do?
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: That's what people want to hear, right?
• 41:04
  Speaker 2: There is no way on earth I would take that pill.
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: He's like getting giddy. I'm going to cut it like that.
• 41:12
  Speaker 1: I'll tell you what I would do.
• 41:14
  Speaker 4: I'd snort it. I'd double down on it. I'd be
• 41:19
  Speaker 4: walking around repelling humans with how much I've taken. I
• 41:23
  Speaker 4: can smell it on him. He's sterile.
• 41:26
  Speaker 1: I'm walking around like this.
• 41:29
  Speaker 2: I would have no issues whatsoever taking it. I stupidly.
• 41:34
  Speaker 1: But would you snort it, Matt?
• 41:35
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I would. I always thought the pill was kind of...
• 41:40
  Speaker 2: I was like, oh, the girls get to take the pill.
• 41:42
  Speaker 2: I thought it was like a lucky thing.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: What?
• 41:45
  Speaker 2: Now I know that it's not. Now I know that
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: it's not.
• 41:48
  Speaker 1: It's so naive as young. Okay, look, if you're a
• 41:53
  Speaker 1: young man listening to this right now, you don't know
• 41:56
  Speaker 1: how fucking good you've got it, bro. If your partner
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: is taking the pill, you don't know how good you've
• 42:01
  Speaker 1: got it. I'll leave it at that.
• 42:03
  Speaker 3: I would add to that, though.
• 42:05
  Speaker 5: Men can have sex without fear of getting someone pregnant
• 42:09
  Speaker 5: because they can take the control.
• 42:10
  Speaker 2: Yeah. It's great.
• 42:12
  Speaker 3: So I actually think it's a good thing.
• 42:13
  Speaker 5: So there's a, you know, there's so many men who
• 42:15
  Speaker 5: sleep around, like they actually have control to not impregnate women.
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah. Can I put it out there?
• 42:21
  Speaker 2: Can I put it out there? Do you think it
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: runs the risk of men being like, oh, yeah, yeah,
• 42:26
  Speaker 2: I'm on the pill when they're not?
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 42:30
  Speaker 2: Is that?
• 42:30
  Speaker 5: Hey.
• 42:31
  Speaker 1: Well.
• 42:31
  Speaker 2: Playing devil's advocate here.
• 42:33
  Speaker 5: No, that is a really interesting point because men are
• 42:35
  Speaker 5: terrible at remembering how.
• 42:36
  Speaker 2: To do anything. Whoa.
• 42:38
  Speaker 1: That's sexist.
• 42:39
  Speaker 2: Not all men. Thank you.
• 42:40
  Speaker 1: Well, that's the thing. We're not allowed to say that either.
• 42:43
  Speaker 5: The reason I brought this up was because it says
• 42:44
  Speaker 5: about 48% of pregnancies worldwide are unplanned and 60% of
• 42:49
  Speaker 5: these unplanned pregnancies are terminated. So I think this is
• 42:53
  Speaker 5: actually aimed at helping maybe developing countries.
• 42:56
  Speaker 2: Yes, very, very smart.
• 42:58
  Speaker 3: Which is why the WHO is leading it.
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: Can I ask you, as a woman with a pill,
• 43:02
  Speaker 1: I know there's various different types of pills. What are
• 43:06
  Speaker 1: just some of the side effects that a young woman
• 43:08
  Speaker 1: can face in the early days of taking a pill?
• 43:12
  Speaker 1: And then what are the side effects of this new
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: pill that have been discovered?
• 43:15
  Speaker 2: Can I just say, great question.
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: Should have saved that for a guest. I know. That
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: whole Joy episode, I'm like, mm-hmm. Everyone's like, is Ash
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: even there? I was here. I just asked the silly question.
• 43:30
  Speaker 2: And Joy, when it comes to the pill.
• 43:33
  Speaker 1: Would you take it? He's like, well, it wouldn't matter now.
• 43:37
  Speaker 2: Side effects.
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: Go, Vic. Weight gain.
• 43:39
  Speaker 3: There's also positive side effects.
• 43:40
  Speaker 5: A lot of reasons women do go on the pill
• 43:42
  Speaker 5: is to prevent really painful periods.
• 43:46
  Speaker 3: It can help your skin. But you can also gain
• 43:48
  Speaker 3: a lot of weight. You can have really big mood swings.
• 43:51
  Speaker 5: It affects your hormones, which can then affect all parts
• 43:54
  Speaker 5: of your body, your hair growth, your skin, nails, everything.
• 43:58
  Speaker 5: The biggest thing I think women have a problem with
• 44:00
  Speaker 5: is how it affects our moods and our hormones because
• 44:03
  Speaker 5: as we've learned from Jackie from the Nourish Cycle, women's
• 44:06
  Speaker 5: hormones are like this going up and down every month.
• 44:09
  Speaker 5: And so the pill, it can kind of even it
• 44:12
  Speaker 5: out in a good circumstance, but in a bad circumstance,
• 44:15
  Speaker 5: if it really clashes with your hormones, it can be
• 44:18
  Speaker 5: like this daily.
• 44:19
  Speaker 1: It's crazy. And also women, some women, I mean like athletes,
• 44:23
  Speaker 1: they might use it to skip periods and stuff, right? Mm-hmm.
• 44:26
  Speaker 5: Yeah, people have been known to do that. I personally
• 44:30
  Speaker 5: didn't like to do that.
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: There you go. Too much information?
• 44:33
  Speaker 2: No, please, no.
• 44:34
  Speaker 1: That's fine.
• 44:35
  Speaker 2: We'll talk about this later. Any side effects of the
• 44:39
  Speaker 2: proposed pill?
• 44:41
  Speaker 1: How dare you steal my question?
• 44:42
  Speaker 2: Sorry.
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: You bastard, that's all I had.
• 44:44
  Speaker 5: Well, it's really interesting because it says other hurdles in
• 44:46
  Speaker 5: previous trials have included side effects with acne, weight gain
• 44:49
  Speaker 5: and impacted mood.
• 44:50
  Speaker 1: So same as women. There you go, same thing. Imagine
• 44:52
  Speaker 1: if it was like side effects are increased size of penis. Oh, no.
• 44:55
  Speaker 2: I'll take it.
• 44:56
  Speaker 1: Oh, no. It's like that's just our luck.
• 44:59
  Speaker 2: Well, that's about bloody time. Who are we going to blame?
• 45:03
  Speaker 2: The scientists.
• 45:04
  Speaker 1: Absolutely. And I think like I don't see what as
• 45:07
  Speaker 1: a man, if April turned around and said, hey, I've
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: been on the pill now for X amount of years,
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: do you mind? sharing the load for a while I
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: think it'd be like yeah okay what's the big deal
• 45:16
  Speaker 1: unless I turned around and said look babe we're going
• 45:18
  Speaker 1: to talk to you about this but I was thinking
• 45:20
  Speaker 1: about would you consider starting a family but if you're
• 45:23
  Speaker 1: like no I don't want to have kids then just
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: a pill you lose you probably pop worse pills on
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: the weekend you're fucking dead.
• 45:28
  Speaker 3: Shit but would you pop a pill so careless.
• 45:30
  Speaker 6: Like um yeah what sorry finish the question but would
• 45:37
  Speaker 6: you pop a pill so effortlessly if it could lead
• 45:39
  Speaker 6: to weight gain skin acne and mood swings.
• 45:43
  Speaker 5: Yeah i mean it's easy to just say you take
• 45:45
  Speaker 5: one but if you knew they were the consequences would
• 45:47
  Speaker 5: you i don't.
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: Need a pill to gain weight don't you worry uh
• 45:49
  Speaker 1: wake up is that what you're gonna say uh It's
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: definitely be something to like, what can I do to
• 45:56
  Speaker 1: help combat the side effects? But if it's that important
• 46:00
  Speaker 1: and it is, and April asked me, then yeah, like
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: at the end of the day, if you're like married
• 46:06
  Speaker 1: nine years today, if you're married to someone, then obviously
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: the way they feel about something matters too. And their
• 46:12
  Speaker 1: input matters as well. It's not just like, I'm not
• 46:14
  Speaker 1: taking it for me. It's like, well, I've been taking
• 46:16
  Speaker 1: it for us for years.
• 46:17
  Speaker 3: You're a good man.
• 46:18
  Speaker 2: Also just quickly, nine years?
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: Nine years married today. Thank you. Thank you. Well done.
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: Did you let me out of the basement this morning
• 46:27
  Speaker 1: to come and record this podcast? No. Nine good years.
• 46:31
  Speaker 2: How are you going to say that?
• 46:32
  Speaker 1: She's a good woman.
• 46:34
  Speaker 3: She is.
• 46:35
  Speaker 1: I'm going to China today, actually, after this. With? Me.
• 46:38
  Speaker 2: Okay.
• 46:39
  Speaker 5: Me only.
• 46:39
  Speaker 1: Me only. It's just the way it worked out. Honestly,
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: booked it and I forgot.
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: No, you fucking didn't.
• 46:48
  Speaker 1: I did, I did, I did. But it was discussed.
• 46:50
  Speaker 2: Do you want to retract that statement, Vic?
• 46:53
  Speaker 1: No, I am a good man.
• 46:54
  Speaker 2: You are a good man.
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: Kind of. But I wasn't, because I'm going to Singapore
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: on Saturday. I was going to be here this week,
• 47:03
  Speaker 1: but April and I had a discussion and something came
• 47:05
  Speaker 1: up and I took the opportunity to do that. And
• 47:07
  Speaker 1: she was like, yeah, fine. Because good marriages are all
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: about compromise. And nine years of compromise.
• 47:11
  Speaker 2: About what, sorry?
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: Compromise. What did you think I said?
• 47:14
  Speaker 2: Control.
• 47:16
  Speaker 3: And when you love someone, it doesn't matter what date
• 47:18
  Speaker 3: you celebrate.
• 47:19
  Speaker 1: Exactly. We celebrate every day. Do you?
• 47:22
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 47:23
  Speaker 5: We.
• 47:23
  Speaker 3: How's the kissing competition going?
• 47:25
  Speaker 2: Don't ask.
• 47:28
  Speaker 1: It's a competition now?
• 47:29
  Speaker 5: Oh, sorry.
• 47:30
  Speaker 1: I kissed you more.
• 47:33
  Speaker 3: The intimacy challenge.
• 47:36
  Speaker 1: I feel like we don't fuck all on this episode
• 47:38
  Speaker 1: in terms of it's all just been housekeeping. We're at
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: the age now where Macy is, and she's been doing
• 47:45
  Speaker 1: dance and stuff like that, so she's really into doing
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: little concerts for us and stuff like that, as you
• 47:51
  Speaker 1: would be aware. You have all girls in your house.
• 47:53
  Speaker 1: Oscar gets involved too, and they're currently in love with
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: Michael Jackson. With all the Michael Jackson stuff that happened
• 47:59
  Speaker 1: this year, with the movie and stuff like that, the
• 48:01
  Speaker 1: playlist has been around. And, of course, it's timeless music,
• 48:04
  Speaker 1: as we know. Beat It, Dirty Diana, all that sort
• 48:07
  Speaker 1: of stuff, timeless.
• 48:08
  Speaker 2: He's very good. I mean, as a person, as an artist.
• 48:12
  Speaker 1: As an artist, great. As a person, jury's still out
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: on that. I don't really know. But as an artist, yeah.
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: So the kids are really into his music and his
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: music only. Just to be very clear on that. And
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: I thought, well, they want to do a concert. As
• 48:26
  Speaker 1: a dad, I am now really interested in automating my house.
• 48:31
  Speaker 1: I'm really into smart bulbs and smart lights. Oh, God.
• 48:35
  Speaker 1: My whole house is automated.
• 48:37
  Speaker 3: Such a dad.
• 48:38
  Speaker 2: Fucking hell. How sad is getting old?
• 48:42
  Speaker 3: The intimacy pillow.
• 48:45
  Speaker 1: If someone turns a light on by the switch, I'm like,
• 48:47
  Speaker 1: don't do that. I have an app. I have an
• 48:51
  Speaker 1: app for that stuff now. Kids are like, oh, can't
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: touch anything. If someone turns the light on illegally, but
• 48:58
  Speaker 1: I can turn the lights on from anywhere in the house,
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: it's amazing.
• 49:01
  Speaker 2: Every bulb?
• 49:02
  Speaker 1: And any colour. So what I've done was I set
• 49:06
  Speaker 1: it up so that we could have a proper concert.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: I'm going to give you a bit.
• 49:09
  Speaker 2: Oh, amazing.
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: I'm going to give you a bit of a.
• 49:11
  Speaker 2: Can it flash?
• 49:12
  Speaker 1: I'll show you. Please. You can press play.
• 49:14
  Speaker 5: This is just.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: Just be mindful. I have a total of 10 minutes
• 49:17
  Speaker 1: of this video, but here's a quick 10-second clip of
• 49:20
  Speaker 1: me and the kids.
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: Oh, she's very good.
• 49:34
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: April. See you later. But.
• 49:39
  Speaker 3: Wow.
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: So what I did was I got all the lights
• 49:41
  Speaker 1: to go flashy party mode and then I got your
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: old iPhone because I had them at my place and
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: got the torch on on top of a tripod so
• 49:48
  Speaker 1: it was like a down light on whoever was singing,
• 49:50
  Speaker 1: which was Macy. I've got a solo on a Macy
• 49:52
  Speaker 1: show later on, like a spotlight. Anyway, so we did
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: the whole, it was like a five-minute song. He did
• 49:56
  Speaker 1: make long songs. I was gassed by the end of it.
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: But their whole personality at the moment, Macy's, is just
• 50:01
  Speaker 1: Michael Jackson. She's got to wear everything black, covering her hands.
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: It's a little jacket. I've got a video of her going...
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: Shaking it, like how he used to like go with
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: the wind.
• 50:12
  Speaker 2: I'm annoyed you didn't have April dancing because she used
• 50:14
  Speaker 2: to be a dancer.
• 50:15
  Speaker 1: She did used to be a dancer. Next time. I've
• 50:17
  Speaker 1: got a really good video of me filming Macy, Oscar
• 50:20
  Speaker 1: being the DJ and also like hyping up and then
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: I pan over and it's April and she's just eating
• 50:25
  Speaker 1: her dinner.
• 50:26
  Speaker 2: And the lot's just like. She's like fucking these bowls.
• 50:30
  Speaker 1: It's cinema. It's absolute cinema.
• 50:33
  Speaker 3: I loved Ash in the back playing the mop.
• 50:35
  Speaker 1: Yeah, the moth.
• 50:36
  Speaker 2: Ah, very good.
• 50:37
  Speaker 1: Thank you. That's also the moth killer. But we kill them.
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: Relocate them.
• 50:42
  Speaker 1: We relocate them to the bin.
• 50:44
  Speaker 2: I want to get those bulbs.
• 50:45
  Speaker 5: Go.
• 50:46
  Speaker 1: Go down to Bunnings.
• 50:47
  Speaker 2: How much are they?
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: Cheap. Well, how much was yours? Yours is a smart bulb.
• 50:50
  Speaker 2: I can't remember.
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: I could connect to that smart bulb right now.
• 50:52
  Speaker 2: Let's do it, guys.
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: After this, we'll do it.
• 50:54
  Speaker 2: The future is here. Contraceptive pill for men and automated bulbs.
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: Honestly, every lamp in the house.
• 51:00
  Speaker 3: What a time we live in.
• 51:01
  Speaker 2: I mean, sure we're going to get fucking killed by
• 51:03
  Speaker 2: AI in like five years, but right now this is
• 51:05
  Speaker 2: a sweet spot.
• 51:06
  Speaker 1: Can I also recommend putting in the lamps in the bedroom,
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: put two bulbs in there, connect them, right, connect it
• 51:13
  Speaker 1: to your phone.
• 51:13
  Speaker 5: Here we go.
• 51:14
  Speaker 1: Mood lighting.
• 51:14
  Speaker 2: Yes!
• 51:16
  Speaker 1: Now let me give you a list of the mood
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: lighting options real quick before I finish this other story.
• 51:21
  Speaker 1: This is what I like to call a side quest.
• 51:23
  Speaker 5: Please.
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: You can have, look. Fireplace, fall, Claire.
• 51:27
  Speaker 2: If you touch them right now, is April going to
• 51:28
  Speaker 2: be like, oh, wow, I'm getting really horny.
• 51:31
  Speaker 1: She's like, all of a sudden I'm really horned up.
• 51:34
  Speaker 2: I just made that joke. I just made that joke
• 51:36
  Speaker 2: and you just took that joke from me.
• 51:39
  Speaker 1: Well, we'll consider it even.
• 51:42
  Speaker 2: You stole my joke. Just laugh at my joke instead
• 51:45
  Speaker 2: of plagiarise it.
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: Let's call it even.
• 51:48
  Speaker 2: Fair.
• 51:49
  Speaker 1: Because Matt screenshots me when he's used my joke on
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: other posts. So consider it payback.
• 51:54
  Speaker 2: I was like, is she really horny? And now she's like, yeah.
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: She's real horny. Anyway, so you can check with Diwali, Christmas, candlelight. Anyway, Halloween,
• 52:04
  Speaker 1: it's great. The kids love it too.
• 52:06
  Speaker 3: Fun for the whole family.
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: Fun for the whole family. You should buy some. This
• 52:08
  Speaker 1: is not sponsored, but it could be. But, yeah, get
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: some smart lights. It's great. But show all done. Macy's pumped.
• 52:14
  Speaker 1: And we thought, she was like, can I do a
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: Frozen one? I'm like, yeah, of course you can do
• 52:18
  Speaker 1: a Frozen one. And she's so excited, okay, and there
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: is nothing wrong worse than your child being at this
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: real level of happy excitement and watching it in real
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: time come crashing down. From what? Let me ask you,
• 52:33
  Speaker 1: where would you rank stubbing your toe on the pain scale?
• 52:37
  Speaker 2: Worse than death.
• 52:38
  Speaker 1: See?
• 52:39
  Speaker 3: Depends on the toe.
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So she's like, I want to go outside and
• 52:42
  Speaker 1: get my heels, like the little fake heels she's got.
• 52:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, get it, girl.
• 52:45
  Speaker 1: Because she wants to put a princess dress on. She's
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: opened the door up.
• 52:50
  Speaker 2: In the excitement.
• 52:51
  Speaker 1: Yeah. The fire door, which is the front door, heavy bastard,
• 52:55
  Speaker 1: heavy bastard, over her big toe.
• 52:59
  Speaker 2: Done the nail? Done the nail.
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: I need to inspect it a day or so later.
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: She's still limping around. But there is nothing like the
• 53:08
  Speaker 1: I'm so excited to.
• 53:09
  Speaker 2: Why, Dad? I'm a good person.
• 53:12
  Speaker 1: And why couldn't it happen to Oscar? Like Macy, it's
• 53:17
  Speaker 1: so sad when anything.
• 53:18
  Speaker 2: Poor Oscar.
• 53:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, but he's a bit more like.
• 53:20
  Speaker 2: Robust.
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: Oh, that's not the right word.
• 53:22
  Speaker 3: No, boys are sensitive too.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: He's a bit more like. Oh, wow. He's a bit
• 53:26
  Speaker 1: more like. He can run it off like a Kelpie.
• 53:29
  Speaker 1: He can totally run it off. Macy, not so much.
• 53:31
  Speaker 1: She just stood there and bellowed. for what felt like
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: an eternity.
• 53:35
  Speaker 2: Did you try and get it back on the track
• 53:37
  Speaker 2: to be like, we can finish the concert? Was the
• 53:39
  Speaker 2: concert over? You're like, automated lights off.
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: No, we finished the concert with her being able to do,
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: I think it was Let It Go, but she was
• 53:47
  Speaker 1: one-legged and I wasn't as good as.
• 53:49
  Speaker 2: It could have been.
• 53:49
  Speaker 1: It's not the same. Wasn't as good as it could
• 53:51
  Speaker 1: have been.
• 53:51
  Speaker 2: No disrespect to any one-legged people out there who listen
• 53:53
  Speaker 2: to the podcast.
• 53:54
  Speaker 1: She's got terrible balance.
• 53:55
  Speaker 3: She's tipping over.
• 53:57
  Speaker 1: Yeah. So anyway, moral of the story is get some
• 54:01
  Speaker 1: lights for your house.
• 54:02
  Speaker 2: Please.
• 54:02
  Speaker 1: It's cheap.
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: And watch the doors.
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: It's also great to freak the kids out too because
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: you can turn the lights on from the other room
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: and they're like.
• 54:11
  Speaker 2: Great. Yeah, Halloween coming up.
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 54:13
  Speaker 2: Perfect timing.
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: Freak them out.
• 54:15
  Speaker 2: Ash, very important message before we go. If you are
• 54:18
  Speaker 2: listening right now and you're thinking to yourself, gosh, I
• 54:22
  Speaker 2: really enjoyed that.
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: That was good.
• 54:26
  Speaker 2: That was enjoyable.
• 54:27
  Speaker 1: All of it.
• 54:28
  Speaker 2: If you've just finished a delicious meal, Of two doting dads.
• 54:32
  Speaker 2: And you think, how can I repay thanks to this
• 54:35
  Speaker 2: incredible episode? Well, actually, there's a way.
• 54:38
  Speaker 1: You can review. Five stars, leave a little message or subscribe.
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: We do not have any, any messages on Apple Podcasts.
• 54:45
  Speaker 2: It's a fucking drought right now. It's like the Sahara.
• 54:49
  Speaker 3: And Matt's checking daily.
• 54:50
  Speaker 2: Like, fuck, is there a glitch? Is there a problem?
• 54:52
  Speaker 1: It's all because of that comment.
• 54:53
  Speaker 2: Not a single comment. It's all because of that comment. No, no,
• 54:55
  Speaker 2: because the Apple Podcasts were three weeks, no comments. No reviews.
• 54:59
  Speaker 1: When did you leave that comment?
• 55:00
  Speaker 3: Speaking of Apple Podcasts though actually, your ep got promoted?
• 55:03
  Speaker 2: Unmissable. April is unmissable.
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: She is unmissable. She is unmissable. Do you hear me, babe?
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: I'm miserable.
• 55:10
  Speaker 2: Well said. Happy anniversary.
• 55:11
  Speaker 1: I get those mood lighting out later when I get
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: back from China.
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: And also we have social media. You can also repay
• 55:19
  Speaker 2: the thanks. If you've been giggling away, be like, hey,
• 55:22
  Speaker 2: you know what? Here's a follow.
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: Go to Dave Hughes' page.
• 55:25
  Speaker 2: Also fucking please.
• 55:26
  Speaker 1: Don't do it. Don't do it. Help a brother out.
• 55:28
  Speaker 1: Two Doting Dads. Instagram, TikTok, Facebook.
• 55:31
  Speaker 2: YouTube.
• 55:32
  Speaker 1: YouTube. Okay, rock.
• 55:34
  Speaker 5: Bye.
• 55:34
  Speaker 2: We'll see you Monday.
• 55:35
  Speaker 1: See ya. Bye.
• 55:45
  Speaker 2: Two Doting Dads podcast acknowledges the traditional custodians of country
• 55:49
  Speaker 2: throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community.
• 55:53
  Speaker 1: We pay our respects to their elders past and present
• 55:55
  Speaker 1: and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: Islander peoples today. This episode was recorded on Gadigal land.