Latest / The conspiracy / Becoming A Mother...

Transcript

Becoming A Mother... · The conspiracy

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: Hey, guys, So I don't know whether I want kids
• 0:04
  Speaker 1: or not, but this video is gonna convince me to
• 0:07
  Speaker 1: or convince me not to, because I'm having a raw
• 0:11
  Speaker 1: conversation with a real life mother. Okay, we all see
• 0:16
  Speaker 1: the moms on Instagram a TikTok just making it look
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: so fun or making it look absolutely terrible, and I
• 0:22
  Speaker 1: just can't believe the Internet. So I thought I would
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: go to the source. Okay, we're going to talk to
• 0:27
  Speaker 1: my sister who's a mother of two under two. Okay,
• 0:31
  Speaker 1: she's in the trenches, but I just thought this would
• 0:33
  Speaker 1: be an interesting conversation, especially for any moms or people
• 0:37
  Speaker 1: potentially wanting to have kids. Even got guys, you can
• 0:39
  Speaker 1: watch those too if you want. But it was a
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: really nice conversation and we'll see if she convinced me
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: by the end if I should have kids or not. Also,
• 0:47
  Speaker 1: you're glowing today. I hope you know that. Are you pregnant?
• 0:51
  Speaker 2: Just kidding?
• 0:52
  Speaker 1: If you are, you're glowing it. If you're not, you're
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: still glowing. Okay, let's get into it. Hello, Welcome, we
• 1:05
  Speaker 1: have my sister Jessica. Yeah, just the different version of me,
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: a different font. Basically, that's the mom font, the mom font,
• 1:17
  Speaker 1: mom long hair. Yeah, yeah, I like the long hair.
• 1:21
  Speaker 1: Long hair, hair is long, dude, it's I know. I
• 1:25
  Speaker 1: was watching your hair the whole time I was visiting.
• 1:27
  Speaker 1: I was just like looking at it when you walk
• 1:29
  Speaker 1: by from behind him, like you like you look like
• 1:31
  Speaker 1: such like a like a medieval granola mom. Like in
• 1:35
  Speaker 1: the best way. I was like, she needs to be
• 1:37
  Speaker 1: in a corset in a dress. I'm in a castle.
• 1:42
  Speaker 2: I think I gotta go get a good a good
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: a good trim.
• 1:45
  Speaker 1: I like it.
• 1:46
  Speaker 2: I like it too, I love it.
• 1:47
  Speaker 1: But yeah, just a.
• 1:48
  Speaker 2: Little bit a good trim. I'm about to these here
• 1:52
  Speaker 2: are about to fully go away.
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: We're getting right into it right now. Yeah, so this
• 1:58
  Speaker 1: whole video now, it's fine. We have we talked about
• 2:01
  Speaker 1: her being a mom all the time and me potentially
• 2:03
  Speaker 1: eventually being a mom, and we just thought it'd be
• 2:06
  Speaker 1: fun to I thought, I thought it'd be fun to
• 2:09
  Speaker 1: interview a real life mother who's living a real life life.
• 2:13
  Speaker 1: And I'm going to see if she can convince me
• 2:15
  Speaker 1: if I should have kids or not. We'll see.
• 2:18
  Speaker 2: And yeah, yeah, I'm not going to sugarcoat it though.
• 2:21
  Speaker 1: No, I know, I hope you don't. But yeah, starting
• 2:23
  Speaker 1: with hair, when's the last time you got your hair done?
• 2:26
  Speaker 2: M It was June June, yeah, and then I got
• 2:31
  Speaker 2: it cut I think the month before that, so it's
• 2:34
  Speaker 2: been what is it like almost November. So it's not
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: bad for you know, like the aren't super bad, but
• 2:41
  Speaker 2: it's too for a trip. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm like,
• 2:45
  Speaker 2: I didn't start noticing hair, uh disappearing with my first
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: baby until month.
• 2:56
  Speaker 1: After having yeah, George.
• 2:58
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 2:58
  Speaker 1: Yeah. It was like I was like, what's happening. I'm
• 3:02
  Speaker 1: turning into dad or Dad's.
• 3:05
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I was like, oh, maybe I'm like not
• 3:08
  Speaker 2: gonna get postpartum hair loss, like it's still fine different
• 3:12
  Speaker 2: and then like I brush my hair and I'm like
• 3:16
  Speaker 2: whole Like I'm talking like you, it's very like, but
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: I'm talking it was gone. This whole thing was gone
• 3:23
  Speaker 2: jo jose wah, gone on.
• 3:26
  Speaker 3: Both sides and then in the back, so like right
• 3:29
  Speaker 3: now I have like it's like road it rowed grew
• 3:33
  Speaker 3: like this long since I had George, but it was
• 3:37
  Speaker 3: all gone.
• 3:37
  Speaker 2: So it's like I lost a bunch in the back
• 3:39
  Speaker 2: and then.
• 3:40
  Speaker 4: This long like you chopped off the back seeing that
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: this TikTok sounds where it's just like it's like once
• 3:47
  Speaker 4: I birth this baby, go through the newborn phase, get
• 3:51
  Speaker 4: my kid in daycare, go through like kick out postpartum depression,
• 3:56
  Speaker 4: kick out postpartum anxiety, grow my hair back.
• 4:00
  Speaker 2: It's over for you all, Like.
• 4:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, just all these things. It's like you
• 4:05
  Speaker 1: can't even imagine what I'm going to be twelve to
• 4:09
  Speaker 1: twenty four months from now.
• 4:11
  Speaker 2: Not even it's like three.
• 4:13
  Speaker 1: Well that's the thing too, is like how how long
• 4:18
  Speaker 1: before you start feeling like a person again after you
• 4:21
  Speaker 1: give birth?
• 4:21
  Speaker 2: To me, personally, I.
• 4:23
  Speaker 1: Know everybody's different, by the way.
• 4:24
  Speaker 2: Everyone's different. I'm this, I'm only going off me. I
• 4:30
  Speaker 2: felt a little bit more normalcy when I stopped breastfeeding. Yeah, whoever,
• 4:38
  Speaker 2: I was still I was pregnant with the second at
• 4:40
  Speaker 2: that point. So I feel like I haven't felt like
• 4:45
  Speaker 2: like truly myself and I did.
• 4:49
  Speaker 1: Wow, Like yeah, because you had two back to back,
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: you are two under two.
• 4:54
  Speaker 2: Yeah, So I feel like I feel like everyone can
• 4:56
  Speaker 2: go back and forth with like what's the best each gap,
• 4:59
  Speaker 2: Like that's like my whole feet all the time, Like
• 5:02
  Speaker 2: what's the best age gap, what's the best age you
• 5:05
  Speaker 2: got to do? What's best for you and your partner.
• 5:07
  Speaker 2: That's probably all I'm gonna.
• 5:09
  Speaker 1: But at this point you said you wouldn't do it again.
• 5:12
  Speaker 2: I when I say two under two, I'm technically I
• 5:16
  Speaker 2: was only two under two for like a month. My
• 5:18
  Speaker 2: kids two now, so it's not too under two. I
• 5:25
  Speaker 2: said that before. Now I'm starting to get into a
• 5:28
  Speaker 2: groove a little. It's hard as heck, but I'm starting
• 5:31
  Speaker 2: to get into groove a little bit, and I like
• 5:34
  Speaker 2: that they will be close in age, especially the first two.
• 5:40
  Speaker 2: And it's it worked out. I think kind of cool
• 5:43
  Speaker 2: that I had two boys. Yeah, I don't know. There's
• 5:48
  Speaker 2: so many different things, like I think for like with
• 5:53
  Speaker 2: doctors or doctors like medically, I think they do recommend
• 5:57
  Speaker 2: like waiting more than two years just for the body
• 6:01
  Speaker 2: to recover, which I get too. But like I also
• 6:06
  Speaker 2: hear a lot of two under two parents they go, yeah,
• 6:08
  Speaker 2: it's really hard for the beginning for a long while,
• 6:13
  Speaker 2: but then it's awesome because they play together. They're in
• 6:16
  Speaker 2: the same chapter of lives together all the time, like
• 6:19
  Speaker 2: pretty much kind of thing.
• 6:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like it'll be a good payoff later on.
• 6:23
  Speaker 1: But seeing you go through what you're going through makes
• 6:26
  Speaker 1: me not want two kids that or two if I
• 6:29
  Speaker 1: even wanted.
• 6:30
  Speaker 2: Kids, that's fair. I've heard a lot of people love
• 6:33
  Speaker 2: the three aged three year age.
• 6:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, because they like get it because you
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: can't really reason with George right now, not at all, No,
• 6:41
  Speaker 1: not of those.
• 6:43
  Speaker 2: But potty trained, sleeping through the night probably like a
• 6:51
  Speaker 2: probably sleeping in their own room. It's dependent on the family.
• 6:53
  Speaker 2: I still sleep with my kid, not this one. This
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: one's in his safe space, Bascett. But it's just like
• 7:00
  Speaker 2: you've established more also like George's like super mommy right
• 7:04
  Speaker 2: now loves daddy, wants to do a lot of fun
• 7:06
  Speaker 2: things with daddy. But like when it comes to sleep,
• 7:09
  Speaker 2: when it comes to just that comfort, it's still mom,
• 7:14
  Speaker 2: so mom, and yeah you're you're there person. I could
• 7:18
  Speaker 2: really push at him a little bit, like might like dad,
• 7:22
  Speaker 2: husband more like, but at the same time, it's like
• 7:26
  Speaker 2: he's gonna want how he's gonna lie. Yeah, it's just
• 7:29
  Speaker 2: and it's not like, yeah, I don't know.
• 7:31
  Speaker 1: You know that feeling when you're out for a walk
• 7:34
  Speaker 1: or a run, if you're crazy and need to hear
• 7:37
  Speaker 1: both your music and what's happening around you. That's exactly
• 7:40
  Speaker 1: why I love Raycon's Essential open earbuds. Thank you so
• 7:44
  Speaker 1: much to Rayon for sponsoring this video. So these open
• 7:47
  Speaker 1: ear earbuds sit just outside your ear canal, so I
• 7:51
  Speaker 1: can be aware of traffic when I'm walking Kevin, or
• 7:54
  Speaker 1: if I'm working on something like, you know, a video
• 7:57
  Speaker 1: game project, I can still hear what's going on around me,
• 8:01
  Speaker 1: like my dogs getting into stuff. And they're incredibly lightweight
• 8:04
  Speaker 1: with a secure multi angular hook that actually stays put,
• 8:08
  Speaker 1: so whether I'm at the gym or I'm just doing
• 8:11
  Speaker 1: chores around the house, I don't have to worry about
• 8:13
  Speaker 1: them falling out. And here's what sold me. Raycon delivers
• 8:16
  Speaker 1: the same premium audio quality as those two hundred dollars brands,
• 8:20
  Speaker 1: but at half the price. Plus with multipoint connection, I
• 8:24
  Speaker 1: can seamlessly switch between my phone and my laptop, which
• 8:27
  Speaker 1: is super handy when I'm working on video game stuff.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: And the battery life is thirty six hours total with
• 8:34
  Speaker 1: the charging case, so that's literally days of listening. And
• 8:37
  Speaker 1: I use these every single day, whether I'm working or
• 8:41
  Speaker 1: working out listening to heavy metal rock. Yes, yes, I
• 8:44
  Speaker 1: listened to that. And Black Friday is just around the
• 8:47
  Speaker 1: Corner and Raycon Audio products are up to thirty percent
• 8:50
  Speaker 1: off site wide, and these deals won't last long, so
• 8:54
  Speaker 1: click the link in the description or go to buy
• 8:56
  Speaker 1: raycon dot com slash kmk open to save during Raycon's
• 9:00
  Speaker 1: Black Friday and Cyber Monday sale that's by raycon dot
• 9:04
  Speaker 1: Com slash k m k open. Than get a Raycon
• 9:07
  Speaker 1: for sponsoring this video. And let's get back to it.
• 9:09
  Speaker 1: What's it like being a twenty four to seven maid
• 9:12
  Speaker 1: and butler?
• 9:14
  Speaker 2: And it's a lot, actually my I think the thing
• 9:20
  Speaker 2: I hate the most is like I wasn't really a
• 9:22
  Speaker 2: cook before, so that's really hard for me. Dinner. Dinner's like,
• 9:26
  Speaker 2: oh dinners, like they're looming.
• 9:28
  Speaker 1: I don't even have kids, and I don't like it.
• 9:30
  Speaker 2: I hate it so like and and that's like a
• 9:33
  Speaker 2: big thing between Adam and I. It's like it's like
• 9:37
  Speaker 2: he loves to have a dinner and he's home. He's
• 9:40
  Speaker 2: a teacher, so he's home a little bit earlier so
• 9:42
  Speaker 2: we can talk about it and see what we want
• 9:44
  Speaker 2: and stuff. But it's like it's like, I'm sorry, this
• 9:48
  Speaker 2: isn't the time for like we're doing like, uh a
• 9:52
  Speaker 2: pan fried steak and making mashed potatoes and doing all
• 9:56
  Speaker 2: this stuff like.
• 9:57
  Speaker 1: You'll put no no, And luckily Adams Adam's family helps
• 10:04
  Speaker 1: out a little bit here and there. It's parallel.
• 10:07
  Speaker 2: And I live with our parents now too, so Mom's
• 10:09
  Speaker 2: always like.
• 10:10
  Speaker 1: Shade to my mom, Sorry, yeah, I have extra.
• 10:13
  Speaker 2: I have extra, which is awesome. And then my in
• 10:17
  Speaker 2: laws are like like usually giving us, if not one,
• 10:23
  Speaker 2: to like two meals a week and that's like I'm
• 10:26
  Speaker 2: in the five week stage. Before they were like trying
• 10:29
  Speaker 2: to make sure we had dinner every single night.
• 10:31
  Speaker 1: That's nice.
• 10:32
  Speaker 2: Every single night between parents, that's a big help weeks.
• 10:35
  Speaker 2: And mom and dad help you as well. Our mom
• 10:37
  Speaker 2: and dad oh a lot.
• 10:40
  Speaker 1: They're like babysitters sometimes, which is great.
• 10:42
  Speaker 2: That's probably one of the things that I totally understand this.
• 10:46
  Speaker 2: Our generations people are not having kids, are not having
• 10:50
  Speaker 2: as many kids because they don't have the village.
• 10:54
  Speaker 1: Yeah no, that's yeah, that'd be a big thing for
• 10:55
  Speaker 1: me because you guys live in Canada, and that's why
• 10:58
  Speaker 1: I'm just like, like, I have Caleb's family here, which
• 11:01
  Speaker 1: is great, but everyone's kind of spread out and there's
• 11:04
  Speaker 1: just something about your your family.
• 11:07
  Speaker 5: I want to ask my mom, like.
• 11:10
  Speaker 1: With me, well I'm taking care, which they would probably
• 11:13
  Speaker 1: come down and all that kind of stuff.
• 11:14
  Speaker 2: But oh yeah, Mom and I were even talking before like, oh,
• 11:17
  Speaker 2: if Christina have kids, like like both Mom and I
• 11:19
  Speaker 2: were like, we'll go down for like the first like
• 11:21
  Speaker 2: the month, like just be around her sell and we'll
• 11:26
  Speaker 2: just hang out. And because when you and Alyssa came
• 11:30
  Speaker 2: up when Teddy was a couple of weeks old, yeah,
• 11:33
  Speaker 2: I have no idea how much that helped me mentally
• 11:38
  Speaker 2: just feel that kind of normalcy having my sisters around.
• 11:42
  Speaker 2: I didn't have you guys with George, like I had
• 11:45
  Speaker 2: you for a few days here and there kind of thing.
• 11:47
  Speaker 1: You were back and yeah, yeah, yeah, I was traveling
• 11:50
  Speaker 1: a lot, a lot, so you.
• 11:51
  Speaker 2: Would only be for a couple of days kind of thing,
• 11:54
  Speaker 2: and blah blah blah. But even though you guys only
• 11:56
  Speaker 2: came for a couple of days or a few days,
• 11:58
  Speaker 2: this time, it was still I had you both at
• 12:01
  Speaker 2: the same time. Yeah, and it was just kind of
• 12:03
  Speaker 2: like and then we were all The other thing was
• 12:05
  Speaker 2: we were all in the same house.
• 12:07
  Speaker 1: I know, and it was like being it was like
• 12:09
  Speaker 1: being transported back in time, except there's kids thrown in
• 12:13
  Speaker 1: the best.
• 12:14
  Speaker 2: And I do feel like, Okay, you've watched my kids
• 12:16
  Speaker 2: long enough for you've helped my kid long. I'm so sorry,
• 12:19
  Speaker 2: Like I'll take it back. I'm not trying to fuse you.
• 12:21
  Speaker 1: I never felt like she's got to take your kid.
• 12:24
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and then Dad kept dealing, Dad kept giving me heck,
• 12:27
  Speaker 2: being like this isn't like you're dumping your kids on us,
• 12:30
  Speaker 2: just like we want them.
• 12:32
  Speaker 1: That kind of reminds me of, uh, this thing that
• 12:34
  Speaker 1: I've seen so much of. And that's like just like
• 12:36
  Speaker 1: mom guilt, especially on like Instagram and TikTok and all
• 12:40
  Speaker 1: this stuff. Moms get shit on.
• 12:45
  Speaker 2: I could cry right now.
• 12:46
  Speaker 1: I it's okay if you do. Moms get shit on.
• 12:49
  Speaker 1: Not not as much as debts. Let's just and that's
• 12:52
  Speaker 1: just a fact. But like, no matter what you do.
• 12:55
  Speaker 1: And I feel bad because I've caught myself not not
• 12:59
  Speaker 1: shitting on you or anything, just being like, why don't
• 13:01
  Speaker 1: you just do this because I'm not a mom, and
• 13:03
  Speaker 1: I know in the in the moment, I'm not judging
• 13:06
  Speaker 1: you or something, but it's just like you get enough.
• 13:10
  Speaker 1: I'm just trying to get suggestions I know, based off.
• 13:12
  Speaker 2: I don't know what when you do it kind of thing,
• 13:15
  Speaker 2: but still Christina, but.
• 13:19
  Speaker 1: Like God forbid, you post something and you're like I
• 13:21
  Speaker 1: did this with my kid today, or this is how
• 13:23
  Speaker 1: I handled this with my kid today, or I a
• 13:26
  Speaker 1: coat sleep or I don't co sleep, or I do
• 13:28
  Speaker 1: this and that's it and everybody's lid. You shouldn't have
• 13:31
  Speaker 1: a kid. I don't know what's your experience with that
• 13:33
  Speaker 1: in social media, because I know you don't post like
• 13:36
  Speaker 1: your kids are like being a mom or anything like that,
• 13:39
  Speaker 1: but like seeing it and then.
• 13:41
  Speaker 2: Comparing it like comments and stuff. Yeah, because like sometimes
• 13:45
  Speaker 2: you go to social media or it's like like support
• 13:52
  Speaker 2: in your own decisions. So like I sleep with my
• 13:56
  Speaker 2: two year old son George, right, and I follow this one.
• 14:01
  Speaker 2: This one mom her family, they they their living space.
• 14:05
  Speaker 2: They actually had like two living rooms or something. They
• 14:08
  Speaker 2: ended up making the living room a bedroom. They have
• 14:12
  Speaker 2: two ink sized beds pushed together and it's a family
• 14:16
  Speaker 2: of four and they all sleep together every night. And
• 14:19
  Speaker 2: now where she bed shared with like her child before
• 14:24
  Speaker 2: they turned one, like zero kind of thing.
• 14:27
  Speaker 1: Color judging again, lowkey, so that's.
• 14:29
  Speaker 2: Where people judge. And now like and now our sister Alissa,
• 14:33
  Speaker 2: she's seen the worst.
• 14:35
  Speaker 1: She's a pediatric nurse, by the.
• 14:36
  Speaker 2: Way, She's seen the the deaths with bed sharing, and
• 14:45
  Speaker 2: it's really scary now being a mom, even with this
• 14:50
  Speaker 2: little guy. Now, I would never, I do not never
• 14:55
  Speaker 2: bring Teddy in the bed with George and I George
• 14:59
  Speaker 2: is way too much of a wild card, right, But
• 15:02
  Speaker 2: if George is gone with Daddy or something and Teddy
• 15:06
  Speaker 2: and I are sleeping during the day, I have had
• 15:09
  Speaker 2: Adam like, I'm like, can you just watch the monitor,
• 15:12
  Speaker 2: like I'm gonna side lay and breastfeed Teddy and I'm so.
• 15:16
  Speaker 1: Tired, Like I could fall asleep.
• 15:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, and I would, and like I could fall asleep.
• 15:21
  Speaker 2: And sometimes I as a mom, I do feel like
• 15:25
  Speaker 2: I have the instincts that I would wake up right,
• 15:29
  Speaker 2: But then you do see those deaths happen, and you
• 15:31
  Speaker 2: think those instincts. So I've I've co slept with Teddy
• 15:36
  Speaker 2: maybe two or three times during the day, and Adam
• 15:39
  Speaker 2: has been checking on me kind of thing with Teddy
• 15:41
  Speaker 2: and everything. But it doesn't take that long. Anything can happen,
• 15:44
  Speaker 2: I know. But to go back to like.
• 15:48
  Speaker 1: Like Instagram and comparing yourself and seeing colm.
• 15:52
  Speaker 2: Training, right, I'm sleep sleep train, I'm I have the
• 15:57
  Speaker 2: luxury though of staying at home. Being at home. Yeah,
• 16:01
  Speaker 2: I'm tired, oh heck, but like but this.
• 16:06
  Speaker 1: Channel all right, yeah, he'll believe it out fun.
• 16:10
  Speaker 2: Trying to share, but it's just also like a feeling
• 16:15
  Speaker 2: that I don't want to go sleep. Yeah, maybe maybe
• 16:18
  Speaker 2: Teddy will give me a run for my money, and
• 16:19
  Speaker 2: I'm like, no, yeah, George, George gave me a run
• 16:23
  Speaker 2: for my money for like through the regressions and stuff,
• 16:25
  Speaker 2: and I was like no, like I can't do the
• 16:27
  Speaker 2: cry it out. I know that there's softer ways to
• 16:31
  Speaker 2: sleep train, but for the moms that do sleep train, dang,
• 16:35
  Speaker 2: like sometimes I might, you know.
• 16:36
  Speaker 1: I see those moms on Instagram and they're like I
• 16:38
  Speaker 1: slept eight hours and I'm like, I'm like, oh I
• 16:40
  Speaker 1: wish that for Jessica is so bad.
• 16:42
  Speaker 2: But are then like you know what? You know what
• 16:44
  Speaker 2: I get way more jealous of it is like the
• 16:47
  Speaker 2: kids that just go to bed, they're like, oh bedtime, yeah,
• 16:52
  Speaker 2: and I get it.
• 16:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And I feel like I'm usually girls. Whenever I
• 16:58
  Speaker 1: see those kids, it's like girls like.
• 17:00
  Speaker 2: I bet yeah, yeah, They're like Okay, I'll go to sleep,
• 17:03
  Speaker 2: see him later. And George is not like that at all.
• 17:08
  Speaker 2: But then that goes also with like temperament babies.
• 17:11
  Speaker 1: Yeah, every baby's different.
• 17:12
  Speaker 2: That's the thing too, is like some sleep train babies
• 17:15
  Speaker 2: are like so easy. Some sleep train babies took forever
• 17:18
  Speaker 2: to get sleep trained. Some sleep train babies are just like,
• 17:21
  Speaker 2: oh I sleep all the time.
• 17:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I swear.
• 17:24
  Speaker 2: My kid just has so much stuff going on in
• 17:27
  Speaker 2: his head. Yeah, all the time. And that's that's kind
• 17:30
  Speaker 2: of why I ended up sleeping with him around like
• 17:32
  Speaker 2: fourteen fifteen months, is like I noticed and I kind
• 17:37
  Speaker 2: of stopped breastfeeding around that time too. He just wanted
• 17:40
  Speaker 2: my skin, like he would kind of wake up in
• 17:42
  Speaker 2: the night and then you'd rub my skin and you
• 17:43
  Speaker 2: go back to sleep.
• 17:44
  Speaker 1: He's a little lovey lovey boy.
• 17:46
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm like, why am I gonna just sleep
• 17:49
  Speaker 2: without him? And then he wakes up, and then he
• 17:50
  Speaker 2: wakes up and then his mind's going, and then I'm
• 17:53
  Speaker 2: hating like to like wrestle him to bed. So that's
• 17:55
  Speaker 2: what just worked for me. But the mom guilt with
• 17:58
  Speaker 2: other people seeing calm of being like you should do
• 18:01
  Speaker 2: it like this, you should do it like that. Why
• 18:02
  Speaker 2: don't you do it like this? I'm like, I don't.
• 18:05
  Speaker 2: I don't know if I ever want to talk about
• 18:07
  Speaker 2: being a mom.
• 18:09
  Speaker 1: And that's fair. Yeah, I get like I've never said
• 18:12
  Speaker 1: you should do mom stuff for this, but if you did,
• 18:14
  Speaker 1: I would be like nervous for your mental health.
• 18:18
  Speaker 2: It'd be a lot and like you can put yourself
• 18:21
  Speaker 2: in that mental spot of like whoever says what, I
• 18:23
  Speaker 2: don't care. It's how I do it.
• 18:25
  Speaker 1: It's extremely hard.
• 18:26
  Speaker 2: It's still it would pile on kind of thing, it would,
• 18:31
  Speaker 2: I think so, And like even I see comments of people,
• 18:35
  Speaker 2: like I'll see a video and I'm like, good for
• 18:36
  Speaker 2: that mom, And then I see the comments and like
• 18:39
  Speaker 2: this other mom is saying you should watch out for this, this, this,
• 18:41
  Speaker 2: you should make sure that it's It's like you can't, right,
• 18:45
  Speaker 2: I didn't even think of that. Yeah, and you start
• 18:47
  Speaker 2: thinking it yourself and you didn't even put yourself out there.
• 18:50
  Speaker 1: Yeah exactly. Yeah.
• 18:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 18:52
  Speaker 1: It's like everybody's learning at the same time. But the
• 18:54
  Speaker 1: internet's just such a it's like good for that stuff.
• 18:58
  Speaker 1: I think in a lot of ways, like I send
• 18:59
  Speaker 1: you stuff where I'm like, oh, this is a good
• 19:01
  Speaker 1: little tip or something, but then I'm just I see
• 19:03
  Speaker 1: more hate than anything.
• 19:05
  Speaker 2: And I feel it's funny because it's like it's it's
• 19:08
  Speaker 2: like moms together, Yeah, like we're we're as one. But
• 19:12
  Speaker 2: then it's.
• 19:12
  Speaker 1: Also like like the planet of the apes comes together,
• 19:16
  Speaker 1: strong apes.
• 19:18
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but then it's like you're wrong, you're wrong, You're right.
• 19:22
  Speaker 1: It's really it's hypocritical. It's very hypocritical. Or also I'm
• 19:28
  Speaker 1: bringing this up. But I also see a lot of
• 19:31
  Speaker 1: it is after birth, you're like bouncing back. That's the
• 19:37
  Speaker 1: biggest thing. Is I bounced back into it. Oh yes,
• 19:41
  Speaker 1: I worked out my warm ring and I only weighed
• 19:45
  Speaker 1: eighteen pounds after I gave birth. I'm like, oh, this
• 19:50
  Speaker 1: is yeah, I see a lot, a lot, a lot
• 19:53
  Speaker 1: of that.
• 19:54
  Speaker 2: I fear, like for me, for some one that has
• 20:00
  Speaker 2: like good genetics, I'm breastfeeding in a way that like
• 20:05
  Speaker 2: I think it like you burn those calories is to
• 20:08
  Speaker 2: help them. I still have a good, nice little pouch there.
• 20:13
  Speaker 2: I'm what almost six weeks postpartum, and I think I
• 20:18
  Speaker 2: didn't like get back to like you know, the regular
• 20:23
  Speaker 2: kind of stomach that I kind of had before until
• 20:26
  Speaker 2: like six months with George. But it's like it's sad
• 20:30
  Speaker 2: for moms that feel like they have to bounce back
• 20:33
  Speaker 2: right away, like I just I'm not I'm not for me.
• 20:38
  Speaker 2: I'm not focused on it right now.
• 20:39
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you good. And that's that's how everyone should be.
• 20:42
  Speaker 1: That's not important. Shouldn't be, it's not important.
• 20:44
  Speaker 2: But it's also hard because you see these moms like
• 20:47
  Speaker 2: and then I like, I'll see friends that have had
• 20:49
  Speaker 2: babies and I'm like, I'm sorry, you had a baby
• 20:52
  Speaker 2: like three weeks ago. Yeah, and you look like that. Yeah,
• 20:55
  Speaker 2: it's still in my head. Yeah, it's still like wow,
• 20:58
  Speaker 2: like what am I doing wrong? But I know everything
• 21:02
  Speaker 2: inside or chocolate or whatever.
• 21:05
  Speaker 1: Yeah, what's your most mom meal lately? Like eating the
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: eating the meal over the sink kind of thing. Oh,
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: it's so dude, I'm old. Dinner dinner.
• 21:16
  Speaker 2: No, we're so sweet. People like I want to say
• 21:19
  Speaker 2: a meal, like, it's not a meal.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Like, dude, I guess what is it?
• 21:23
  Speaker 2: What is it?
• 21:23
  Speaker 1: What's what's that meal? What's that meal? Quote quote unquote.
• 21:28
  Speaker 2: Probably like a spoonful of nutella. Yeah, that's a filling
• 21:33
  Speaker 2: was on sale costca Oh I haven't a nutella for
• 21:38
  Speaker 2: it either, And I saw it and I was like, screwt.
• 21:41
  Speaker 2: And there's just a spoon sitting there by the new
• 21:43
  Speaker 2: tell jar. I said, sir Lista the other day too,
• 21:46
  Speaker 2: and she's like, so you do that every day. I'm like, yeah,
• 21:49
  Speaker 2: probably every few hours.
• 21:50
  Speaker 1: You're like ted Lasso. I finally watched Ted Lasso the
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: peanut butter jar. He always leaves open on his counter.
• 21:55
  Speaker 1: It's just a new tella. Or you're like, boost o.
• 21:59
  Speaker 2: Good, it's so much sugar and I just don't care.
• 22:01
  Speaker 2: It's fine whatever that. But then also Adam and I've
• 22:08
  Speaker 2: been having like these like burrito things, carnitas.
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: I'm talking about like on the peasant mom meal.
• 22:20
  Speaker 2: And you know, if I'm trying to make myself feel better,
• 22:23
  Speaker 2: pepperoni stick and the cheese string.
• 22:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah you're yeah, you're cheese and pepperoni. How long have
• 22:27
  Speaker 1: you gone without showering? Be honest? After having baby? Yeah,
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: or just being a mom? What's the longest? Doesn't need
• 22:37
  Speaker 1: we don't need to know when.
• 22:37
  Speaker 2: It was, m M I would say nine days.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: It's pretty good numbers.
• 22:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I didn't know what I was.
• 22:50
  Speaker 1: That's fair. I've seen I've seen moms on the internet
• 22:53
  Speaker 1: and stuff being like it's been two weeks. I'm like,
• 22:56
  Speaker 1: that's nine days.
• 22:57
  Speaker 2: Yeah, it was because I was like almost ten days
• 22:59
  Speaker 2: and I was just like, I don't even care if
• 23:02
  Speaker 2: he cries. I have to have a shower.
• 23:04
  Speaker 1: That's like slower than I thought. I've been sad and
• 23:07
  Speaker 1: I've done gone longer than that.
• 23:09
  Speaker 2: It's but like you're also covered in breast milk. Yeah,
• 23:15
  Speaker 2: that's fair smell postpartum bo.
• 23:18
  Speaker 1: I've heard it's terrible.
• 23:20
  Speaker 2: Like what do you smell like? I don't have to
• 23:24
  Speaker 2: fell it smells like you. It smells like boh, like it's.
• 23:28
  Speaker 1: Sour milk, worse and wet grass.
• 23:34
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And when I said I went nine days without showering,
• 23:37
  Speaker 2: like I'm talking like I still took like wipes every
• 23:40
  Speaker 2: night and like wiped.
• 23:41
  Speaker 1: My Oh, I'm not judging you. I've gotten longer than that.
• 23:44
  Speaker 1: Haven't touched myself. I haven't, like no, and I'm not.
• 23:46
  Speaker 2: I don't.
• 23:47
  Speaker 1: I've been graced up.
• 23:48
  Speaker 2: I just washed my hair, like I said to Micky. So,
• 23:52
  Speaker 2: my my mom's best friend came over last night to
• 23:56
  Speaker 2: watch Teddy for me. My husband's sick, which is inconvenient,
• 24:00
  Speaker 2: very but I don't want him holding the newborn while
• 24:04
  Speaker 2: I go to the shower or when I have to
• 24:06
  Speaker 2: do stuff with George, because George will not let daddy
• 24:09
  Speaker 2: do stuff. Anyways, I didn't wash my hair for six
• 24:13
  Speaker 2: or seven days since she keep over the last night
• 24:15
  Speaker 2: and I washed my hair.
• 24:16
  Speaker 1: That's nice. Oh, Teddy's in her in her in her
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: arms right now. Yeah, that's fair. Oh what is something
• 24:25
  Speaker 1: you swore you wouldn't do.
• 24:27
  Speaker 2: Before you were a parent and now you do it
• 24:30
  Speaker 2: all the time?
• 24:30
  Speaker 1: Because that's what I'm curious about, because I love to
• 24:33
  Speaker 1: yap about like I'm not going to do this with
• 24:35
  Speaker 1: my future kid if I ever have one, and I'm
• 24:37
  Speaker 1: never going to do this, but I'm like I I'll
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: probably give it to all that stuff.
• 24:43
  Speaker 2: It's hard because like being so I was a teacher
• 24:45
  Speaker 2: before this, and like it's like it kind of set
• 24:49
  Speaker 2: me up for like, don't put some expectations on what
• 24:52
  Speaker 2: you think you're gonna do. Yeah, but I will say
• 24:58
  Speaker 2: I will say I thought I be outside a lot
• 25:01
  Speaker 2: more like George, ready to go go outside. We're gonna
• 25:05
  Speaker 2: go do this, We're gonna go do that.
• 25:08
  Speaker 1: Also, we live in I mean in Canada where it's
• 25:11
  Speaker 1: just bleak and gray most of the year as well.
• 25:13
  Speaker 2: A lot and then it's like by the time you
• 25:16
  Speaker 2: get up by the time you like get stuff going.
• 25:20
  Speaker 2: I have a goal set in mind with Teddy and George,
• 25:25
  Speaker 2: especially George being a chiddler. Now he needs to go outside.
• 25:28
  Speaker 2: Like when he was a baby, I said I was
• 25:30
  Speaker 2: going to go out for walks and do all this
• 25:31
  Speaker 2: stuff and blah blah blah, and I was like, no,
• 25:34
  Speaker 2: we're just chilling. Man, He's gonna do this and we're
• 25:36
  Speaker 2: gonna go visit parents and grandparents and call her a
• 25:40
  Speaker 2: day Like that was the biggest thing. But now I'm like, okay, yeah,
• 25:45
  Speaker 2: I think I I think I overestimated how easy it
• 25:47
  Speaker 2: was to get out.
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, what's something you miss that you would just
• 25:51
  Speaker 1: be like, oh, I'm just gonna go do this.
• 25:54
  Speaker 2: Oh probably just rotting.
• 25:57
  Speaker 1: Oh just rotting. Not even like I'm gonna go to winters. No,
• 26:01
  Speaker 1: just brought guilt.
• 26:04
  Speaker 2: Like it's just like sitting on the couch watching binge,
• 26:08
  Speaker 2: watching a show for howeveryone you want and yeah, like
• 26:15
  Speaker 2: now it's like, no, I can't do that, Like, yeah,
• 26:17
  Speaker 2: I could watch my show with George playing with his
• 26:23
  Speaker 2: stuff and everything's not.
• 26:24
  Speaker 1: The same though. You're just you're constantly head on a swivel, choking.
• 26:28
  Speaker 2: Is he don't feel good because you don't have good
• 26:31
  Speaker 2: stuff on before the kid where you have the TV on? Yeah, no,
• 26:36
  Speaker 2: I knew I was going to be a screen time mom,
• 26:38
  Speaker 2: so that's not something. Yeah, you're like, fully, I have it,
• 26:43
  Speaker 2: That's that's fair. No, Miss Rachel's my girl, fair enough,
• 26:48
  Speaker 2: my girl sesame street o G we love Elmo. That's
• 26:53
  Speaker 2: what George is going as and uh newly the Wiggles.
• 27:01
  Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
• 27:02
  Speaker 1: That's pretty good. It's pretty good. So when you do
• 27:04
  Speaker 1: leave the house, what's that look like like when you
• 27:07
  Speaker 1: were when you're baby free? May would take what oh minutes?
• 27:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah? No, And I'm someone also that I hate being
• 27:15
  Speaker 2: late and as a mom kids chances sorry, you might
• 27:19
  Speaker 2: be like, because things come up.
• 27:21
  Speaker 1: How long does it take on average two kids under two?
• 27:26
  Speaker 2: I usually start like to go get somewhere. I'll start
• 27:31
  Speaker 2: I'll start like prepping, like probably forty five minutes in advance.
• 27:36
  Speaker 1: That's grace. Yeah, it makes sense, but it's crazy.
• 27:42
  Speaker 2: Let's get you dressed, let's change it.
• 27:43
  Speaker 1: No wonder, we don't go out sax.
• 27:46
  Speaker 2: Let's make sure there's let's make sure there's whatever this.
• 27:50
  Speaker 2: Oh let's like and then but then you're also giving
• 27:52
  Speaker 2: the time of like of like, oh crap moments. Yeah,
• 27:57
  Speaker 2: Like it's okay. We wanted to do this at I
• 28:02
  Speaker 2: Love thirty and so I'm like, hmm, we'll see how
• 28:06
  Speaker 2: long George takes to put down for a nap. Right now.
• 28:08
  Speaker 2: I'm like, I'm going to give him half hour, like
• 28:12
  Speaker 2: we're going to struggle, like he's not going to be
• 28:14
  Speaker 2: super tired just yet, but and he might fight me
• 28:17
  Speaker 2: a little bit, but let's give a half hour. Good
• 28:20
  Speaker 2: thing I did because we get into bed, we get
• 28:22
  Speaker 2: all cozy, and I just changed a poopy diaper, like
• 28:25
  Speaker 2: fifteen minutes before that he pooped again. Awesome, And I'm like, stellar,
• 28:30
  Speaker 2: did I leave the poopy diaper somewhere? Like why do
• 28:32
  Speaker 2: I keep spelling it? And then I look at it
• 28:34
  Speaker 2: and I'm like, oh, you pooped again. Okay, let's change it.
• 28:36
  Speaker 2: Let's do it. So like there's these timings of things
• 28:39
  Speaker 2: that you're like, Okay, oh crap moment, Oh crap moment,
• 28:43
  Speaker 2: Oh crap moment?
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: Is it? Is it like your your life is very
• 28:48
  Speaker 1: regimented now, like you can't be spontaneous really your life
• 28:51
  Speaker 1: revolves around a lot of napp times and stuff.
• 28:55
  Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's also a like, Okay, yeah, because you
• 29:00
  Speaker 2: don't want to miss a nap time and you do
• 29:02
  Speaker 2: not want to miss bedtime.
• 29:03
  Speaker 1: Yes, so you're kind of you're kind of a.
• 29:05
  Speaker 2: You don't you don't and like even if you're a slow,
• 29:09
  Speaker 2: good on you, Good for you. I hope your kid
• 29:11
  Speaker 2: is just chill as you and you're just but if
• 29:15
  Speaker 2: my kid doesn't sleep, worry we got problems, yes, and yeah, yeah,
• 29:21
  Speaker 2: it's a lot. And then like I'm I'm honestly so
• 29:25
  Speaker 2: nervous about Teddy because I'm so less anxious this time around. Yeah,
• 29:31
  Speaker 2: especially about sleep. I'm like, okay, let's follow the wake windows. Sure,
• 29:35
  Speaker 2: let's make sure you don't sleep over this many whatever,
• 29:37
  Speaker 2: blah blah blah. But like with George, I was.
• 29:39
  Speaker 1: Like, to the minute I remember, yeah, I think most
• 29:43
  Speaker 1: moms are, it seems, but the first.
• 29:44
  Speaker 2: Now I'm like, Okay, how am I supposed to Like, okay,
• 29:47
  Speaker 2: Teddy has to go down, then George will have to
• 29:49
  Speaker 2: go down like later, and then Teddy will have to
• 29:50
  Speaker 2: go down. So am I going to have like one
• 29:52
  Speaker 2: kid sleeping at all times during the day? At some
• 29:55
  Speaker 2: point I was just going to work. And but I
• 29:59
  Speaker 2: think that's where the birth order psychology of like that
• 30:02
  Speaker 2: second kid is just so much more go with the flow. Yeah,
• 30:06
  Speaker 2: what it is, because at that point the mom has
• 30:08
  Speaker 2: to adapt to just be like we're just gonna have
• 30:11
  Speaker 2: to do what we gotta do. Yeah, it's it's gonna
• 30:13
  Speaker 2: have to be some car naps. It's going to be
• 30:15
  Speaker 2: like yeah, that's yeah, that's good.
• 30:18
  Speaker 1: But you're you're, you're, you are under their thumb for
• 30:23
  Speaker 1: like the past two years, you've just been Yeah, so
• 30:26
  Speaker 1: that sounds not so fun, but I get it, Like
• 30:28
  Speaker 1: it's an absolute sacrifice, like being a mom. It quite
• 30:31
  Speaker 1: literally is a twenty four so of a job. Like
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: I can't stand on the people that are like it's
• 30:34
  Speaker 1: not a job.
• 30:35
  Speaker 2: It's like, no, it's.
• 30:38
  Speaker 1: You're keeping things alive.
• 30:40
  Speaker 2: Going to work would be would be almost considered a
• 30:44
  Speaker 2: break at this point.
• 30:46
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's whatever.
• 30:48
  Speaker 2: However, it's still like I like, for me, I get
• 30:51
  Speaker 2: anxious even thinking about leaving.
• 30:53
  Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe that's a whole other stressful thing Like moms
• 30:55
  Speaker 1: I have to go to work anyways.
• 30:57
  Speaker 2: But like, yeah, no, you're with them, Like I'm just
• 31:01
  Speaker 2: waiting for George to wake up. Teddy fell asleep too,
• 31:04
  Speaker 2: so he's he's going to wake up. We're supposed to
• 31:07
  Speaker 2: go to the pumpkin patch today, which we'll go to.
• 31:13
  Speaker 2: I have no idea if I'm going to have to
• 31:15
  Speaker 2: like say, George, sorry, you have to stay in the
• 31:18
  Speaker 2: stroller because I have to feed Teddy. Yeah.
• 31:20
  Speaker 1: It's constant improv. It sounds like it's like you're on
• 31:23
  Speaker 1: stage all the time doing improv like just this okay
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: and say yes, you have to say yeah.
• 31:28
  Speaker 2: Give you more. I'll give you our morning. Okay. I
• 31:31
  Speaker 2: talked to you earlier this morning. Yes, And I hung.
• 31:33
  Speaker 1: Up, and I'm like, George was choking, by the way.
• 31:35
  Speaker 1: At some point he was okay, he's fine.
• 31:38
  Speaker 2: And uh, he was fine. Yeah, And then I realized,
• 31:41
  Speaker 2: oh my gosh, we have a cairopractor appointment ten fifteen okay, okay, okay,
• 31:48
  Speaker 2: And usually when we have Cairo, that's when I do
• 31:50
  Speaker 2: a Costco run. And I didn't eat a lot, but
• 31:53
  Speaker 2: I looked at the clock and I'm like, I think
• 31:55
  Speaker 2: you can make it work. Yeah, I do it. George,
• 31:57
  Speaker 2: you up for it. You up for it Costco And
• 31:59
  Speaker 2: he's like, yeah, like I said, forty five minutes getting
• 32:03
  Speaker 2: everybody ready. We got to make sure. So I was like,
• 32:06
  Speaker 2: if we're gonna do it. We got to do it
• 32:07
  Speaker 2: now because we got off the phone at eight thirty. Right, move, move, move,
• 32:12
  Speaker 2: we get going. It was I get in the car,
• 32:15
  Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, nine to eighteen. Takes about ten minutes
• 32:18
  Speaker 2: to get there. We'll have thirty minutes in Costco and
• 32:22
  Speaker 2: then we have to go to Cairo.
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: Yeah, need to work.
• 32:25
  Speaker 2: It was all good. Teddy leaving car he was sleeping
• 32:31
  Speaker 2: that whole time, and then leaving Cairo crying so much
• 32:36
  Speaker 2: that he was not breathing. Oh no, for a minute,
• 32:39
  Speaker 2: like I could hear him in the car, so I
• 32:41
  Speaker 2: had to pull over and go in the back of
• 32:44
  Speaker 2: the car and just calm him down and everything. Then
• 32:47
  Speaker 2: we come back here and I'm like, okay, we were
• 32:51
  Speaker 2: I have an eleven thirty thing with you. I still
• 32:53
  Speaker 2: have to get George to sleep. I have groceries in
• 32:57
  Speaker 2: the car that need to go in the fridge, right,
• 33:00
  Speaker 2: And You're like, okay, Teddy's still crying his lungs out,
• 33:02
  Speaker 2: so I'm gonna I'm gonna, yes, get in his car
• 33:07
  Speaker 2: seat while I slowly unload the the things and then
• 33:11
  Speaker 2: have the door open and keep joking with George, being
• 33:14
  Speaker 2: like hey, stranger or like whatever, making it fun getting
• 33:18
  Speaker 2: stuff in George. Then I get George out. He's like trampoline, trampoline, trampoline,
• 33:23
  Speaker 2: and I'm like looking at the time, I'm like, okay,
• 33:26
  Speaker 2: we have about twenty minutes until I have to put
• 33:28
  Speaker 2: you down. I do have to put whatever. I'm like, okay,
• 33:30
  Speaker 2: I can give him ten minutes. Give Teddy quick feed
• 33:33
  Speaker 2: he's jumping on the trampoline. Lure him in with a
• 33:36
  Speaker 2: chocolate and banana whatever here boy. Yeah, I'm like, let's
• 33:40
  Speaker 2: go in. Teddy's still crying his eyes out. I'm still
• 33:43
  Speaker 2: trying to breastfeedt holding him up whatever. And then George
• 33:47
  Speaker 2: has a poopy bumb, change his bumb.
• 33:50
  Speaker 1: My heart rates gone up since this is started.
• 33:52
  Speaker 2: We finally get to bed, he needs a diaper change again,
• 33:56
  Speaker 2: we change his diaper. I'm trying to end. The worst
• 33:58
  Speaker 2: is you're trying to make it fun the whole time.
• 34:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're you're an enter you're an improp,
• 34:03
  Speaker 1: you're an entertainer.
• 34:05
  Speaker 2: Let's go and then a lot of days you're not
• 34:09
  Speaker 2: fun and then the mom guilt comes in right for
• 34:13
  Speaker 2: sory long.
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: So no, it's okay, that's fine, That's what it's like.
• 34:16
  Speaker 1: The real The real insight into an actual mom's life
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: is that.
• 34:22
  Speaker 2: What stresses you out the most about having kids is
• 34:24
  Speaker 2: just not half.
• 34:25
  Speaker 1: So no, not because I'm a homebody. I never go anywhere.
• 34:30
  Speaker 1: So I'm like, well, my life won't change that much.
• 34:32
  Speaker 1: Like I don't travel anymore. I don't leave the house really,
• 34:35
  Speaker 1: kle but I just stay in and because we we
• 34:37
  Speaker 1: have the farm and the property and we're just kind
• 34:39
  Speaker 1: of like hanging out with my But no, that is
• 34:44
  Speaker 1: a worry for sure, not a worry, but it's something
• 34:46
  Speaker 1: like I'm very aware of. I'm like, okay, I need
• 34:48
  Speaker 1: I want to be there for them one hundred percent.
• 34:51
  Speaker 1: I want to be as one hundred percent as I
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: can be. And then the other part is just my
• 34:56
  Speaker 1: because I have like severe into of thoughts that compiled
• 35:02
  Speaker 1: with like partly like OCD and depression and all that
• 35:06
  Speaker 1: kind of stuff. But I'm just like, and I know
• 35:09
  Speaker 1: I'll be like that when I have my first kid,
• 35:10
  Speaker 1: like I will think they're going to die all the time,
• 35:14
  Speaker 1: and like how it'll be my fault and then I
• 35:16
  Speaker 1: spiral and I'm.
• 35:17
  Speaker 2: Like, yeah, that's well.
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: And also just my life, which my my dynamic changing. Yeah,
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: I guess I guess, yeah, I guess yeah, well.
• 35:27
  Speaker 2: Like being someone that doesn't have intrusive thoughts, and that's.
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: Sure you do. You've had that as a mom, I'm.
• 35:33
  Speaker 2: Sure Like as a mom though, yeah, I have, right,
• 35:37
  Speaker 2: Like like you look at the kid's neck and you're like,
• 35:40
  Speaker 2: what if it? Just yeah, what if it? What if
• 35:44
  Speaker 2: I just fell down these stairs? Yeah? Would I land
• 35:48
  Speaker 2: forward on top of the baby or what what if
• 35:51
  Speaker 2: I Yeah, it happens and it just all the time.
• 35:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah unless so even like yes, yes, intrusive thoughts,
• 35:59
  Speaker 1: but also just like like we were on the phone earlier,
• 36:02
  Speaker 1: like you just said, and I heard George and he
• 36:05
  Speaker 1: was fine. He wasn't choking. He was coughing, so that
• 36:06
  Speaker 1: means he could breathe. But he is making those sounds.
• 36:09
  Speaker 1: Teddy's making weird sounds while we're doing this, and it
• 36:11
  Speaker 1: is my like I am, I am so anxious, Like
• 36:15
  Speaker 1: I get so anxious. And of course they're my nephews,
• 36:18
  Speaker 1: so obviously I'm but even if any kid, like if
• 36:20
  Speaker 1: any kid is like in any sort of distress or
• 36:23
  Speaker 1: like I'm like like I.
• 36:25
  Speaker 2: Am, Like, it's a lot. It's like if you heard
• 36:29
  Speaker 2: Teddy cry today, Like Teddy cried the hardest he's cried
• 36:31
  Speaker 2: in his whole life. Today. Yes, it was okay, I'm
• 36:36
  Speaker 2: gonna I'm not gonna lie. I was impressed with myself
• 36:39
  Speaker 2: with how calm I stayed. That's good because I've gone
• 36:43
  Speaker 2: through this with George, right like you go through it.
• 36:46
  Speaker 2: But becoming a mom, like I know you're like, oh yeah,
• 36:52
  Speaker 2: lifestyle changed this and you know, intusive thoughts. It's crazy
• 36:57
  Speaker 2: to me how like you just uh, you just go
• 37:00
  Speaker 2: with it.
• 37:01
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, like it is improv like it's just like
• 37:04
  Speaker 1: it is intuition, and.
• 37:07
  Speaker 2: I think like setting yourself up with like like I
• 37:10
  Speaker 2: think before Teddy was born, I talked a lot more
• 37:14
  Speaker 2: with Adam of things that I'm going to need, of
• 37:18
  Speaker 2: things that I'm going to expect.
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think, Yeah, that's.
• 37:22
  Speaker 2: Before we didn't know. Like I would say, zero to
• 37:24
  Speaker 2: one was a bigger change for me than one to
• 37:27
  Speaker 2: two kids.
• 37:28
  Speaker 1: For sure, it's still hard, it's still sure, for sure,
• 37:31
  Speaker 1: But it's just like your whole, both of your lives
• 37:34
  Speaker 1: change when a kid's in it and you just don't
• 37:36
  Speaker 1: you don't know what to expect to tell you're in it.
• 37:37
  Speaker 1: But that's that's one thing that Caleb and I talk
• 37:40
  Speaker 1: about a lot and have since we've known each other.
• 37:44
  Speaker 2: Is like.
• 37:46
  Speaker 1: Who's going to do what, How they're going to do that,
• 37:48
  Speaker 1: How he's going to support me, How I'm going to
• 37:50
  Speaker 1: support him if we ever get into arguments. Now, it's
• 37:54
  Speaker 1: just like let's let's pretend we have a kid in this,
• 37:57
  Speaker 1: Like we we are like constantly doing hypotheticals. Yeah with
• 38:01
  Speaker 1: the kid, which I thought is good.
• 38:02
  Speaker 2: I think it's good because it's like for me, I'm
• 38:05
  Speaker 2: like I did hypothety. I did so many hypotheticals with
• 38:09
  Speaker 2: when like just before Teddy came. Yeah, Like okay, so
• 38:13
  Speaker 2: I'm putting George down and you're doing whatever. It's not
• 38:16
  Speaker 2: gonna be like this. I'm gonna put George down and
• 38:18
  Speaker 2: you're gonna have Teddy, right, or I'm gonna have Teddy
• 38:22
  Speaker 2: and you're gonna have to deal with George. Yeah whatever.
• 38:25
  Speaker 2: So like we did do more of the hypotheticals and
• 38:27
  Speaker 2: then like and to keep it simple, I kind of said,
• 38:35
  Speaker 2: I take care of Teddy and as much as and
• 38:38
  Speaker 2: George pretty much as much as I can, you take
• 38:41
  Speaker 2: care of me, Like, yeah, I think that's to take George.
• 38:47
  Speaker 2: You take George if I need you to warm me
• 38:50
  Speaker 2: up some food. You warm me up some food.
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: Like it's just and that dynamic works for you, guys, it.
• 38:54
  Speaker 2: Works for us, and then you know we're we're like
• 38:57
  Speaker 2: a trade off couple a lot. It's like okay, hey,
• 39:00
  Speaker 2: I'll do I'll do like cleaning up all the toys,
• 39:06
  Speaker 2: like wiping some stuff down or whatever. Yeah, if that's
• 39:09
  Speaker 2: time and it's right.
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I take two dinners and raise you a free
• 39:14
  Speaker 1: poopy diverse.
• 39:15
  Speaker 2: The like, Okay, yeah, you and Caleb have been together
• 39:19
  Speaker 2: for a couple of years kind of thing and not
• 39:24
  Speaker 2: judging it off by the years, but I'm actually kind
• 39:26
  Speaker 2: of going off more of like the age and how
• 39:28
  Speaker 2: well you know yourself now.
• 39:29
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think that that adds to it for sure.
• 39:32
  Speaker 2: I think that totally adds to it. I think it's
• 39:35
  Speaker 2: actually more important than the longevity of your relationship is
• 39:39
  Speaker 2: like where are you going in with this? So like
• 39:42
  Speaker 2: for me, when I think about you being as a mom, like,
• 39:45
  Speaker 2: I totally see it. I've always seen it. Even when
• 39:48
  Speaker 2: you said I don't know, I'm not having kids, I'm like.
• 39:49
  Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, when I was younger, I was like no.
• 39:54
  Speaker 2: And I'm like maybe not, but yeah, you will like.
• 40:00
  Speaker 1: You're doing a great job of convincing me you will.
• 40:03
  Speaker 1: Like half of day was a hell I have no, no, no,
• 40:08
  Speaker 1: I'm just kidding.
• 40:08
  Speaker 2: Okay. Now now I'll like give you a little bit
• 40:11
  Speaker 2: more of it. So you live for the little moments.
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: Okay.
• 40:16
  Speaker 2: So today we're in Costco. The lady gives him a
• 40:20
  Speaker 2: sticker and we always go say thank you, say thank you.
• 40:24
  Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, thank you so much. The
• 40:28
  Speaker 2: like that's a whole buggy ride out to the car,
• 40:31
  Speaker 2: thank you so much, thank you so much, so cute,
• 40:36
  Speaker 2: so much. I gave him up nan And when we
• 40:37
  Speaker 2: got home, thank you so much, mommy.
• 40:41
  Speaker 1: You're like, yeah, at that point when they can actually
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: start to like talk and.
• 40:45
  Speaker 2: You're talking or like Teddy like crying, crying, crying, crying,
• 40:50
  Speaker 2: and then I know it's a gassy smile, but like
• 40:53
  Speaker 2: we came out before, we're on the phone with you
• 40:55
  Speaker 2: and each other is so cute and it's just like
• 40:58
  Speaker 2: a gassy smile and you're like, yeah, you just know.
• 41:01
  Speaker 2: And it's like and then seeing your partner as a parent,
• 41:07
  Speaker 2: especially like you're the partner that you're like, no, I
• 41:09
  Speaker 2: want to make him a dad. Yeah, and you make
• 41:13
  Speaker 2: him a dad, and then you see them just thrive
• 41:16
  Speaker 2: with like these different scenarios or whatever. It's like it's
• 41:21
  Speaker 2: so cool. Ye's so cool, and you're just so full,
• 41:25
  Speaker 2: you're exhausted, but you're like it's so great. Like even
• 41:30
  Speaker 2: just even when like I know I didn't handle a
• 41:34
  Speaker 2: situation good, or if I know Adam could have handled
• 41:39
  Speaker 2: a situation better, we're at that point where it's like
• 41:43
  Speaker 2: we know that you know it.
• 41:44
  Speaker 1: We don't need to you don't need to say usual understanding.
• 41:48
  Speaker 2: Yeah, or it's like hmm, I'm going to step in
• 41:51
  Speaker 2: here you're you're heightened emotion like, or Adam will step
• 41:57
  Speaker 2: in for me if I'm like I'm gonna cry. Yeah,
• 42:00
  Speaker 2: I'm done.
• 42:01
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 42:02
  Speaker 1: Yeah, because you're getting into that good guy, bad guy
• 42:06
  Speaker 1: cap bad cop kind of situation with George now that
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: he's like can talk and stuff.
• 42:11
  Speaker 2: Yeah, And I find that like I always thought like, oh,
• 42:14
  Speaker 2: it's just like the more patient one is like the
• 42:16
  Speaker 2: good cop kind of thing, but really you're saving your partner.
• 42:20
  Speaker 2: You're just saving your partner. Yeah, And it's like yeah,
• 42:24
  Speaker 2: but anyways, Yeah, It's it's like it's just like you
• 42:29
  Speaker 2: live for the little moments and I think like when
• 42:33
  Speaker 2: and if you have kids. When you have kids, you're
• 42:38
  Speaker 2: just like you'll be great and it'll be totally fine,
• 42:43
  Speaker 2: and like especially with the level of like like humor
• 42:47
  Speaker 2: in your household.
• 42:48
  Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. Yeah, I'm like scared, Like I'm excited,
• 42:52
  Speaker 1: but I'm scared what we'll create.
• 42:55
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, because you're very like loud.
• 42:57
  Speaker 1: And I think it'll be good at entertaining. I think
• 43:00
  Speaker 1: that'll be our strong suit. Which I think. It sounds
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: like that's most parenting when they're very young.
• 43:07
  Speaker 2: And you have to deal with it, like like it's
• 43:10
  Speaker 2: the hardest time in a relationship for sure.
• 43:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like.
• 43:14
  Speaker 2: You want to clock them at one point. It's never
• 43:16
  Speaker 2: about like for Adam and I, it's never about like
• 43:19
  Speaker 2: how he parents that I want to like get wrong,
• 43:22
  Speaker 2: it's not that. It's just like it's the expectations, right,
• 43:25
  Speaker 2: you're not eating my expectations, you're not meeting my expectations. Yeah,
• 43:29
  Speaker 2: that's hard part. But seeing them as a parent, it's like,
• 43:32
  Speaker 2: oh that's so cool. Yeah.
• 43:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like for my moms because you're I mean,
• 43:37
  Speaker 1: it's you. It's you for most at least for most people,
• 43:40
  Speaker 1: it's usually it's on you. Like i'd say them at
• 43:43
  Speaker 1: least the first year. You're kind of the parent, you know,
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: and I'm like, and you're beast feeding, and I yeah.
• 43:51
  Speaker 2: And I'll say the term exclusively best breastfeeding. So like,
• 43:55
  Speaker 2: my kids don't take bottles like it is all on me,
• 43:58
  Speaker 2: and I like it that way. Honestly, I'm lazy.
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: That's why you want to do dishes, which I wouldn't
• 44:05
  Speaker 1: want to either.
• 44:06
  Speaker 2: I don't want to pump and put it into a bottle.
• 44:09
  Speaker 2: I don't. So when I say that, I'm not saying
• 44:12
  Speaker 2: it to be I'm lazy.
• 44:16
  Speaker 1: I don't like doing dishes.
• 44:18
  Speaker 2: The pumping moms, I'm going to say, like to you,
• 44:21
  Speaker 2: if you said, you know what, I think we're going
• 44:23
  Speaker 2: to be a pump I'm going to just pump and
• 44:24
  Speaker 2: just give them the express milk. I would check in
• 44:27
  Speaker 2: on you every single day being like, are you okay.
• 44:30
  Speaker 1: I've seen this. I mean, I don't know about it
• 44:33
  Speaker 1: too much, but I've heard like mom's suffering.
• 44:36
  Speaker 2: Oh, it's it's just it's the it's the worst of both.
• 44:41
  Speaker 2: It's like, instead of formula and you just have a
• 44:44
  Speaker 2: bunch of dishes and everything, you're still using like so
• 44:48
  Speaker 2: much energy. Of your body, and then you have the
• 44:50
  Speaker 2: dishes on top of it. I don't even know my
• 44:54
  Speaker 2: friend does it, and we're always like, how how did
• 44:58
  Speaker 2: you last?
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: Like I don't anyway, that's fair good segue into my
• 45:03
  Speaker 1: actual like my biggest, biggest fear, and that is pregnancy.
• 45:07
  Speaker 2: Oh is that? Oh? Okay, okay, So what are your
• 45:10
  Speaker 2: fears about being pregnant?
• 45:11
  Speaker 1: Well, first of all, as most of my audience knows,
• 45:14
  Speaker 1: I had an e d yes still low key recovering,
• 45:19
  Speaker 1: but I'm I'm like more at peace with that now.
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: I'm like I've recovered to the point where, you know,
• 45:24
  Speaker 1: I have my woman bodily functions back and all that
• 45:27
  Speaker 1: stuff for a long time and I'm capable of, you know,
• 45:31
  Speaker 1: being at a healthy weight and stuff, and I'm like
• 45:34
  Speaker 1: good with that. But I feel like, even for women
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: without necessarily a needing disorder or something like that, it's
• 45:40
  Speaker 1: like hard to wrap your head around the fact that
• 45:43
  Speaker 1: you're gonna have a different body, as vain as that sounds,
• 45:48
  Speaker 1: which I don't think many women would disagree with me,
• 45:50
  Speaker 1: but it's just like, oh, I'm that's really scary. That's
• 45:54
  Speaker 1: really scary. I'm going to live in a different body yeah, yeah.
• 45:57
  Speaker 2: And it's not like and it's just like different, Like
• 46:01
  Speaker 2: we're talking about your aerial that's getting bigger. We're talking
• 46:04
  Speaker 2: about like.
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, like stuff changes colors, and stuff stretches and and
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: then and then there's a baby inside you, which scares me,
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: Like I like that feeling a kid like knowing, I
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: don't know, that's like horrifying to me. Oh okay, that's
• 46:20
  Speaker 1: that's also horrifying.
• 46:22
  Speaker 2: Honestly, I thought it felt pretty cool. Okay, Yeah, there
• 46:25
  Speaker 2: was some monthset really sicked my first trimester. Never actually
• 46:29
  Speaker 2: like threw up, but the nausea, it's a lot. You're
• 46:33
  Speaker 2: so tired, Yeah, so tired. You don't start feeling them
• 46:37
  Speaker 2: until like halfway through.
• 46:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, so ye did that. Your pregnancies were pretty similar, right,
• 46:44
  Speaker 1: your two pregnancies.
• 46:46
  Speaker 2: So super super like nauseous and tired. First trimester, second trimester,
• 46:55
  Speaker 2: thriving love. Second trimester. My bump, the bump was pumping.
• 47:01
  Speaker 2: It wasn't like, oh, did she just put on some weight.
• 47:04
  Speaker 1: It was like, yeah, there's the second trimester.
• 47:06
  Speaker 2: At my wedding, I think, yeah, and there's like there's
• 47:08
  Speaker 2: two and then and then third trimester. You're doing okay,
• 47:15
  Speaker 2: But those last weeks, You're like.
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we got lots of snaps from Dusts in the
• 47:20
  Speaker 1: last weeks, where she's like.
• 47:21
  Speaker 2: Hell yeah, it's and pregnant with the toddler death like
• 47:28
  Speaker 2: you just it's yeah when you're you, when you do
• 47:34
  Speaker 2: get pregnant for the first.
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: Time, Yeah, I've and I feel so bad for you.
• 47:40
  Speaker 1: I feel so bad for you. But I've learned from
• 47:42
  Speaker 1: watching you where I'm like, oh, I'm gonna favor.
• 47:45
  Speaker 2: My first those bigger age gaps can be helpful, right,
• 47:51
  Speaker 2: But anyways, and then you have like other things in pregnancy.
• 47:55
  Speaker 2: So I had restless leg syndrome. Yeah, I meet that
• 47:59
  Speaker 2: for you. In the especially in the third trimester was worse.
• 48:03
  Speaker 2: I'd be up all hours of the night and my
• 48:05
  Speaker 2: legs are going crazy. I'm taking too much magnesium that
• 48:09
  Speaker 2: I'm almost like grabbing my pants like just to try
• 48:12
  Speaker 2: to calm it down. I had barrycose veins I like
• 48:17
  Speaker 2: swollen my second pregnancy. I was so hungry, I.
• 48:23
  Speaker 1: Know, yeah, you were just like she would snap us
• 48:25
  Speaker 1: at like three am, like I just woke up and
• 48:27
  Speaker 1: I needed to eat five pepperoni steaks and a bullet theeal. Dude,
• 48:32
  Speaker 1: I'm sorry.
• 48:34
  Speaker 2: It's just it was weird. But like so and so, yeah,
• 48:37
  Speaker 2: your body is changing.
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: Did your senses get heightened? Like, what's with that with
• 48:42
  Speaker 1: the smell and stuff? Do you become like a super.
• 48:45
  Speaker 2: I've always been a little bit ishu with smells, but yeah,
• 48:47
  Speaker 2: I think I was also because Adam. I swear Adam
• 48:50
  Speaker 2: loves the most smelliest foods, and I'm just like so
• 48:52
  Speaker 2: does Kala here, and like I swear that his car
• 48:56
  Speaker 2: smells so bad. But everybody's like, I don't smell anything.
• 49:00
  Speaker 2: I'm like, so, yeah, maybe some sense that okay, yeah,
• 49:05
  Speaker 2: well okay, however, I will tell you this, I've never
• 49:08
  Speaker 2: felt sexier.
• 49:10
  Speaker 1: You said. You've said that, which is never felt awesome.
• 49:14
  Speaker 1: I love that for you.
• 49:14
  Speaker 2: I mean the last few weeks where I'm like, yeah,
• 49:18
  Speaker 2: I'm like beach whale, don't come me, one touch me, whatever.
• 49:23
  Speaker 2: But like it was just like I don't know, I
• 49:27
  Speaker 2: don't know what it was, especially second trimester, you're just
• 49:30
  Speaker 2: like BM.
• 49:31
  Speaker 1: Like yeah, look at its adorable.
• 49:33
  Speaker 2: Even if you're like all swollen and stuff. I don't
• 49:35
  Speaker 2: even know. It was just like I was swollen, I
• 49:38
  Speaker 2: was this, but it was just I felt yeah, I
• 49:43
  Speaker 2: just felt good.
• 49:44
  Speaker 1: But yeah, but yeah, I want to it's.
• 49:48
  Speaker 2: Hard to I never I haven't gone through what you've
• 49:51
  Speaker 2: gone through.
• 49:52
  Speaker 5: Yeah.
• 49:53
  Speaker 2: Yeah, very very valid thing to make be like, Okay,
• 49:58
  Speaker 2: I'm so hyper aware of how I was and now
• 50:02
  Speaker 2: I'm going to go and change my entire body and
• 50:05
  Speaker 2: then be scared of the whole bounce back.
• 50:09
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and especially being on the internet, like that's my job.
• 50:12
  Speaker 1: So I'm just like knowing people will judge me no
• 50:14
  Speaker 1: matter what it's like, but like.
• 50:18
  Speaker 2: And you can, you can tell me if I'm like
• 50:21
  Speaker 2: like wrong and how I'm thinking this. But like during
• 50:25
  Speaker 2: the time that you did really struggle with the eating
• 50:31
  Speaker 2: disorder like bad and then like you've slowly been working
• 50:35
  Speaker 2: on it. It wasn't until like a couple of years
• 50:41
  Speaker 2: ago you started being in a stable relationship. I find
• 50:46
  Speaker 2: m M that time, Like, yes, I knew you were
• 50:48
  Speaker 2: with like your ex boyfriend or whatever at the time
• 50:51
  Speaker 2: that kind of happened, but like at that time, like
• 50:54
  Speaker 2: I don't think you, like, were you guys close to
• 50:58
  Speaker 2: breaking up bad that time?
• 51:00
  Speaker 1: Mm hmmm mm hmm. Yeah, No, it's bad. It was
• 51:04
  Speaker 1: no being an a I.
• 51:05
  Speaker 2: Don't want to put it on the partner.
• 51:07
  Speaker 1: No, No, it definitely wasn't on them at all.
• 51:10
  Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, but I just mean, if you got pregnant,
• 51:13
  Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I feel like you're just such a stable place.
• 51:17
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 51:17
  Speaker 1: No, That's that's why I haven't had kids yet, because
• 51:19
  Speaker 1: I've been I've been like always very aware that I'm like,
• 51:23
  Speaker 1: I want to be nobody's one hundred percent, but I
• 51:26
  Speaker 1: want to be as close to one hundred percent before
• 51:28
  Speaker 1: I have a kid, especially before I if gosh, if
• 51:32
  Speaker 1: I had a if I had a girl, I would
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: never want to project, which I wouldn't. I'd be like
• 51:37
  Speaker 1: probably overcompensating, be like you're perfect, You're beautiful, but it
• 51:42
  Speaker 1: would be me. I don't want to ever. And this
• 51:44
  Speaker 1: is not a hit on mom at all, and Mom
• 51:47
  Speaker 1: didn't cause anything of this, but on top of us
• 51:51
  Speaker 1: growing up at an age of Instagram and Instagram models
• 51:54
  Speaker 1: and photoshopping and all that stuff. If so, on top
• 51:57
  Speaker 1: of that, if if Mom ever said something bad about herself,
• 52:00
  Speaker 1: I'd be like, and everyone's like, oh, you look just
• 52:03
  Speaker 1: like your mom, Then my my brain would be like
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: I bad. And I've had lots of therapy and I'm
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: over it now. But anyway, I I just don't want
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: to be negative. About myself. If I even I have
• 52:16
  Speaker 1: a son or a daughter, doesn't really matter.
• 52:19
  Speaker 5: So like.
• 52:22
  Speaker 2: You think about like think about grammy, I'm sure, oh.
• 52:25
  Speaker 1: Our grandma was just like the I feel like most
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: grandma's were just.
• 52:29
  Speaker 2: Like honest, very honest, blunt. I grew up with blunt.
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, and we've just been bringing it down. So I'm
• 52:36
  Speaker 1: just you know, I'm not trying to break any like
• 52:39
  Speaker 1: you know thing because I didn't grow up in like
• 52:41
  Speaker 1: a traumatic environment or anything. But I know for me,
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: since I went through that and it affected me in
• 52:48
  Speaker 1: different ways, just the whole thing. I know how I
• 52:52
  Speaker 1: would want to raise a kid now, just not like
• 52:56
  Speaker 1: not putting any emphasis on, uh, what you look like
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: and all that kind of stuff. So I want to
• 53:03
  Speaker 1: be in a place.
• 53:05
  Speaker 2: Just walk around and like the no and just like
• 53:08
  Speaker 2: I'm fine with it.
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: I'm a modest mom for sure. That's not my jam,
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: but if it's yours whatever, But yeah, yeah, So I
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: feel like and it's not that I think having a
• 53:19
  Speaker 1: kid would fix me and I don't want that. I
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: don't want to I don't want to ever bring a
• 53:22
  Speaker 1: kid into this world to be like this will fix something.
• 53:25
  Speaker 1: But I think I think in watching many people around
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: me have kids, and and now just my feeling, I'm
• 53:32
  Speaker 1: just like, I want to care for something other than
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: myself now because I'm good now, and Caleb cares for me,
• 53:37
  Speaker 1: and I care for him, and I like caring for him.
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: But I'm just like, I feel like I'm at the
• 53:41
  Speaker 1: point where I could care for something else and I
• 53:43
  Speaker 1: could be good at it.
• 53:45
  Speaker 2: Yeah. Absolutely, yes, Like even my chiropractice she kind of
• 53:48
  Speaker 2: gives me you vibes too. She didn't want kids and
• 53:52
  Speaker 2: she has three. Yeah, and she's like came to a
• 53:54
  Speaker 2: point in life with like, so what, I'm going to
• 53:58
  Speaker 2: go and have another margarita on a boat somewhere and
• 54:01
  Speaker 2: have fun with it. Like yeah, And that's for some
• 54:03
  Speaker 2: people and for people that I want to do that,
• 54:07
  Speaker 2: no judgment.
• 54:08
  Speaker 1: No judgment at all. Yeah, But for me, I have that.
• 54:10
  Speaker 1: I have that feeling now that mom and Dad said
• 54:12
  Speaker 1: that I would when I was younger, when I was like,
• 54:14
  Speaker 1: I'm never gonna have kids, are like, I think you
• 54:17
  Speaker 1: might want some later and maybe some people don't find
• 54:20
  Speaker 1: that that's fine and yeah all yeah, for me, it
• 54:24
  Speaker 1: all revolved around finding the right person. Yeah, totally revolved
• 54:28
  Speaker 1: around that. I was like, oh, I think being a
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: parent with you would be amazing, and making a little
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: person with you would be amazing, or adopting a kid
• 54:36
  Speaker 1: or whatever.
• 54:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I grew up like I want to be a
• 54:41
  Speaker 2: mom yeah.
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: Which is awesome, which is yeah, that's totally fine, which
• 54:44
  Speaker 1: brings me to our final a phase, which is birth.
• 54:51
  Speaker 1: We kind of went backwards. That's also something I'm terrified of, uh,
• 54:56
  Speaker 1: very much so experiencing all that pain. So well, okay,
• 55:05
  Speaker 1: this is convincing me or not convincing me, so yeah, yeah, yeah,
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: But I'm no hero.
• 55:14
  Speaker 2: I like the drugs, I don't. I don't do drugs
• 55:17
  Speaker 2: or barely. I barely drink alcohol in regular life. So
• 55:21
  Speaker 2: when i'm so, I'm like, mix up any cocktail you want.
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: Let's go, like, yeah, you have, you had.
• 55:28
  Speaker 2: I had the epidural for the first one for just
• 55:32
  Speaker 2: under a couple of hours, was having an apple sauce popsicles,
• 55:37
  Speaker 2: laughing with my team whatever with my husband. Boom baby
• 55:42
  Speaker 2: was out. How exciting. Second birth. Cervix was in the
• 55:50
  Speaker 2: way too late for the epidural. I came into the
• 55:53
  Speaker 2: hospital eight centimeters dilated. I was fine an hour before
• 55:58
  Speaker 2: it was like okay, contract actions are five to seven
• 56:01
  Speaker 2: minutes apart. We're this is when we're supposed to go in.
• 56:03
  Speaker 2: Let's go in. Oh hi, Jessica, you're eight centimeters dilated.
• 56:07
  Speaker 2: We're gonna get you to a room right away. Yeah. Oh,
• 56:11
  Speaker 2: we're actually gonna send blood work away. We're not gonna
• 56:14
  Speaker 2: need you because this baby's coming out in ten minutes.
• 56:16
  Speaker 2: Like sorry, what, yeah, I'm like, okay, baby's coming out
• 56:20
  Speaker 2: in ten minutes. I'm really pissed off about this epidural.
• 56:22
  Speaker 2: But okay, fine, I won't have an epidural. Baby did
• 56:25
  Speaker 2: not come in ten minutes, did not come in fifteen,
• 56:27
  Speaker 2: did not come in an hour, came in like after
• 56:31
  Speaker 2: two hours, and cervix was in the way. Cervix wouldn't
• 56:35
  Speaker 2: go out, move out of the way. I don't know whoever,
• 56:37
  Speaker 2: if you're listening to this and you're like, yes, you're
• 56:38
  Speaker 2: not saying this right, correct me. But my cervix was
• 56:42
  Speaker 2: in the way. They had to put their hand up
• 56:44
  Speaker 2: me while I'm pushing. Now, let me tell you this.
• 56:48
  Speaker 2: I will say when it hurt, like hell, yeah for sure.
• 56:54
  Speaker 2: But when I was allowed to push during a contraction
• 56:59
  Speaker 2: and no hand was up me, I can see how
• 57:03
  Speaker 2: you could get in the zone. Yeah you can do it. Yeah,
• 57:07
  Speaker 2: you do it. I was okay. Yeah it sucked, but
• 57:11
  Speaker 2: I was okay. When what I wasn't okay with was
• 57:15
  Speaker 2: when they were trying to move my service out of
• 57:18
  Speaker 2: the way for Teddy to come out, which apparently he
• 57:20
  Speaker 2: was also weirdly positioned, because she said, this baby's either
• 57:24
  Speaker 2: huge or he's weirdly positioned, and he was just weird
• 57:27
  Speaker 2: position And so that was what was really hard for me.
• 57:32
  Speaker 2: So even if you didn't get the epidural, yeah, your body,
• 57:38
  Speaker 2: your body will do it. You can do it, you
• 57:40
  Speaker 2: can to that zone. And that mentality I did not.
• 57:45
  Speaker 2: What I would say, what I failed to do was
• 57:48
  Speaker 2: I was so gung ho about getting an epidural.
• 57:51
  Speaker 1: For second was her birth plan.
• 57:52
  Speaker 2: Yeah, that was my plan. And when that I just
• 57:58
  Speaker 2: didn't think I wouldn't not get an epidirl. I thought
• 58:01
  Speaker 2: I'd go in too early and I'd be sent home
• 58:04
  Speaker 2: so I would get that up adirl anyway, don't do
• 58:07
  Speaker 2: what I did. Yeah, just had a plan for yourself
• 58:09
  Speaker 2: mentally everything that you might not get that epidirl if
• 58:12
  Speaker 2: you were like pro epidural. Yeah yeah, And the other thing.
• 58:21
  Speaker 2: So when I had George. I just wanted to be
• 58:24
  Speaker 2: me and Adam, just me and Adam. I just wanted
• 58:27
  Speaker 2: I just think. And when I had Teddy, I was like, oh,
• 58:32
  Speaker 2: I just want Mom to watch George because I just
• 58:35
  Speaker 2: feel like good about because George has you know, Mom
• 58:40
  Speaker 2: has put George to bed before when we've gone out
• 58:43
  Speaker 2: or something like that. I felt my anxiety leaving my
• 58:46
  Speaker 2: first at home was so like I was so scared
• 58:49
  Speaker 2: about that, but knowing that he was with Mom, it
• 58:51
  Speaker 2: completely calmed me. Yeah, but I needed Mom in that
• 58:58
  Speaker 2: livery room this time. Yeah, I wanted Mom so bad. Yeah,
• 59:03
  Speaker 2: I'm like, if I do have this third baby, Rick
• 59:08
  Speaker 2: Adam could stay home.
• 59:10
  Speaker 1: I know because I remember the first one. Mom My,
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: Mom and me were sleeping like in the on the
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: bottom floor of the hospital, like waiting for just to
• 59:18
  Speaker 1: have a baby, and she ended up just having it
• 59:20
  Speaker 1: with her husband and we're like oh, but I was like,
• 59:23
  Speaker 1: you know what, I get that. But then yeah, like
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: this time around, I want special option Adam and I.
• 59:29
  Speaker 1: But the option's nice if you can have like I
• 59:33
  Speaker 1: would want her to be in the hospital for me
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: to be like or but like I would I think
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: I would like to experience it like you did. Like
• 59:39
  Speaker 1: I didn't understand it at the time. I was like, dude,
• 59:43
  Speaker 1: but then I was like, no that makes sense.
• 59:46
  Speaker 2: No, well, like right, and I just know that makes sense.
• 59:49
  Speaker 2: And I'm like We've had this whole blah blah blah. Yeah,
• 59:52
  Speaker 2: and then the second.
• 59:52
  Speaker 6: Time around, I was like, m be kind of nice
• 59:55
  Speaker 6: with mom, but like I it just makes me feel
• 59:58
  Speaker 6: so much more calm that George is with with my
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 6: with mom, and George could have been with my in
• 1:00:03
  Speaker 6: laws too.
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 2: And I wouldn't have felt so worried either. However, I
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 2: was just like, oh, they've never put him down for
• 1:00:09
  Speaker 2: bed before because I never really gave him that opportunity.
• 1:00:13
  Speaker 2: It's all on me. There's he loves his grammar by yeah,
• 1:00:17
  Speaker 2: you're right, but it was just yeah, and so like
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 2: if you do give birth to your first one and
• 1:00:24
  Speaker 2: you're like I just wanted me and Caleb for sure,
• 1:00:26
  Speaker 2: but like like coming off of me, Yeah, I I
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 2: needed mom that second time.
• 1:00:35
  Speaker 1: That's fair. That's fair.
• 1:00:37
  Speaker 2: I needed mom.
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: And I was like, so, don't have a birth plan
• 1:00:41
  Speaker 1: basically or have one but also plan and see have.
• 1:00:45
  Speaker 2: One, like yeah, like have one, and just being like
• 1:00:50
  Speaker 2: you want the baby to get a healthy Yes, I
• 1:00:51
  Speaker 2: do want an epidural if there's time for one. Whatever.
• 1:00:55
  Speaker 2: I would just say, mentally, prepare yourself that the plan
• 1:00:58
  Speaker 2: just doesn't go to plan all the time. Hmmm. Yeah,
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 2: I have to be like I was. I was screaming,
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 2: and I was like this close to being like, give
• 1:01:05
  Speaker 2: me a sea section. Yeah, I'm done, I'm done pushing. Yeah,
• 1:01:09
  Speaker 2: you can't get my services out of the way. Get
• 1:01:11
  Speaker 2: me a sea section. Yeah, fair enough. And I don't
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 2: know if any moms can relate to this, but I
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 2: pushed out. I pushed out Teddy, and you know people
• 1:01:24
  Speaker 2: are like, oh my gosh, and then that feeling of
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 2: when you finally push them out and you get your baby. No,
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 2: I didn't have that. Oh, I pushed him out. I
• 1:01:33
  Speaker 2: love my son. I pushed him out, and I was like,
• 1:01:36
  Speaker 2: somebody take him, somebody take him to hold him. Just
• 1:01:40
  Speaker 2: let me. Let me give me five.
• 1:01:42
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's fair. I'm just gorilla gripping my vagina right now.
• 1:01:45
  Speaker 1: I'm just I can't even imagine this.
• 1:01:48
  Speaker 2: Give me five. And it was like no, no, no, here's
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 2: your baby, Jessica.
• 1:01:52
  Speaker 1: And you're like, oh, that's fair.
• 1:01:57
  Speaker 2: You just need you need it minute and even when
• 1:02:01
  Speaker 2: I had George, I was like, what, this is my baby? Okay?
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 2: And then yeah, fall in love sure, and like sometimes
• 1:02:10
  Speaker 2: some women are like, I don't blame the women that
• 1:02:13
  Speaker 2: also like they take like a month or so or something. Yeah,
• 1:02:17
  Speaker 2: I don't. I'm not surprised. It's so crazy your hormones,
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 2: your hormones, like you're Yeah, some people get baby blues,
• 1:02:30
  Speaker 2: some people get postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety. I get it.
• 1:02:35
  Speaker 2: I get it. Those people that go like that feel
• 1:02:38
  Speaker 2: like they're going crazy. I get it. And I think, like,
• 1:02:44
  Speaker 2: I've been fortunate enough. No, I have not had postpartuer
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 2: I did not have it with George our Teddy and
• 1:02:50
  Speaker 2: I were I'm I'm okay. But it's it's a lot.
• 1:02:58
  Speaker 2: And so you give birth and you're just sick, and
• 1:03:01
  Speaker 2: it's all about the expectations. You give birth and they're
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 2: just like, here's your baby, your mom, Like I just like,
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 2: I just went through a floor.
• 1:03:13
  Speaker 1: Yeah, give me a minute, just just a sec, Yeah,
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: just fair enough.
• 1:03:19
  Speaker 2: Oh, by the way, we got to deliver your placenta.
• 1:03:21
  Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, the after No, why does nobody talk about that?
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: How long does that take?
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 2: With George?
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: And then they push on your stomach and stuff. What's that?
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 5: Oh?
• 1:03:32
  Speaker 2: Yeah? So with George it took like half hour, like
• 1:03:34
  Speaker 2: place just not coming. But I had the epidural, so whatever.
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 2: Within a few pushes or whatever, they're like, can you
• 1:03:41
  Speaker 2: push again? Can you push a little bit? Okay, Jess,
• 1:03:44
  Speaker 2: we also need to like give you like a stitch
• 1:03:47
  Speaker 2: or two. I'm like, can you put freezing down there?
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 1: Did they?
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 2: Can you freeze? Yeah?
• 1:03:53
  Speaker 1: Oh thank god?
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 2: But I was like, what an epidural? Yeah, don't stitch
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 2: me without like I don't want to feel like well
• 1:04:00
  Speaker 2: but freezing. Here's a needle and you're like.
• 1:04:03
  Speaker 1: Okay, and that's the thing too. I faint when I
• 1:04:06
  Speaker 1: get a needle, dude.
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 2: So when A faint when I when I get a
• 1:04:11
  Speaker 2: needle If you want morphine though.
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: Yeah, for me, it's really like big needle or or
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 1: pushing a football out of my vagina. I'm like leaning
• 1:04:22
  Speaker 1: towards football. I hate needles, Like, I don't think people
• 1:04:26
  Speaker 1: understand I cannot stand when something.
• 1:04:27
  Speaker 2: Goes in the back.
• 1:04:30
  Speaker 1: I know I've had a spinal tap before and I
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: but I.
• 1:04:36
  Speaker 2: Didn't even feel it. I was like I was I.
• 1:04:38
  Speaker 1: Was even talking about them to pass out. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah.
• 1:04:44
  Speaker 1: I think at the moment when you're like experiencing someone contractions,
• 1:04:47
  Speaker 1: you're just like putt it in me. I'm not against
• 1:04:49
  Speaker 1: Appa Durol either. Caleb's funny was like, for just for
• 1:04:53
  Speaker 1: your peace of mind, I'll get I'll get an epidural
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: first so we know and then we can both feel
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 1: what it's like. I'm like, that's very big. If you
• 1:05:02
  Speaker 1: think he's joking, obviously I'm either going to like love
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: him dearly when I'm giving birth or I'm gonna want
• 1:05:11
  Speaker 1: to kill because he's going to be like what He's
• 1:05:14
  Speaker 1: going to be cracking jokes and I'm gonna be like, oh.
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 2: Adam was like chilling. He's just he was my water boy.
• 1:05:26
  Speaker 2: He kept getting me water down a leg for me. Yeah,
• 1:05:29
  Speaker 2: don't even look down there.
• 1:05:31
  Speaker 1: Yeah no, I think that. Yeah, I'm like, you stay
• 1:05:33
  Speaker 1: right right up front.
• 1:05:34
  Speaker 2: Second, Teddy, I don't know how many times you said this,
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 2: it's all temporary. It's all temporary. I think by the
• 1:05:42
  Speaker 2: third time, like fifth time, I was like, but he
• 1:05:48
  Speaker 2: was trying so hard. I know.
• 1:05:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the thing. I think. I think i'd have
• 1:05:51
  Speaker 1: to I'd have to go into it being like what
• 1:05:53
  Speaker 1: you're about to experience. Isn't me, it's not your wife.
• 1:05:56
  Speaker 1: This will be a monster. I was potentially yeah, and
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: that's fair, and that's fair.
• 1:06:02
  Speaker 2: Do you still like me?
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: Like, yeah, you know, I just came earth and I
• 1:06:08
  Speaker 1: just turned into the exorcist. But am I still pretty screaming?
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: Who was that back? That was crazy? Let's order sushi.
• 1:06:19
  Speaker 2: And then and then my eye I broke like a pad.
• 1:06:23
  Speaker 2: You literally looked like you went through an exorcism over
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 2: my whole eye.
• 1:06:27
  Speaker 1: And I was like just.
• 1:06:29
  Speaker 2: And then I kept complimenting at and being like, thank
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 2: you for looking at me normal. I look at myself
• 1:06:34
  Speaker 2: in the mirror and I forget that I have an
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 2: eye like this.
• 1:06:38
  Speaker 1: I know I transformed into the halt come back there,
• 1:06:40
  Speaker 1: but I start, yeah.
• 1:06:43
  Speaker 2: Yeah, birth is scared your first one though, Like they
• 1:06:48
  Speaker 2: don't come that fast, so you should be able to
• 1:06:51
  Speaker 2: be Okay, we'll see.
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 1: I'm not not gonna I'm gonna have zero expectations. I
• 1:06:55
  Speaker 1: think getting into it, I'm she'd be like, it's gonna happen,
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: and it's gonna happen, however.
• 1:06:58
  Speaker 2: It happens the third one. In the moment, I feel
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 2: like contraction, I'm just going to go in. Yeah.
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're like it's coming, it's sprinting out with the
• 1:07:09
  Speaker 1: top hat.
• 1:07:10
  Speaker 2: Give me the epidural.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:07:13
  Speaker 2: And if we like, yeah, you'll be you know what.
• 1:07:17
  Speaker 2: I I don't know if I've convinced you to have
• 1:07:20
  Speaker 2: kids or not, but it's something that it's gonna be
• 1:07:24
  Speaker 2: a lot of short term gain, a short term pain
• 1:07:27
  Speaker 2: for a lot of long It's gonna be what Adam said,
• 1:07:29
  Speaker 2: and it is going to be temporary.
• 1:07:31
  Speaker 1: All these little, these little moments, this too shall pass. Yeah,
• 1:07:36
  Speaker 1: that's kind of what. And unfortunately, again, you're the first
• 1:07:39
  Speaker 1: kid that had the first kids, and I get to
• 1:07:42
  Speaker 1: just watch you and be like, ooh I like that. Okay,
• 1:07:44
  Speaker 1: Oh nope, don't like that. Okay, not gonna do that, Okay.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: So unfortunately, I'm sorry. Watching you has absolutely helped me
• 1:07:55
  Speaker 1: with wanting kids. It has not deterred me. I mean,
• 1:07:58
  Speaker 1: you know there's shows, you know those when I FaceTime
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: you and all I hear is and I'm like, oh,
• 1:08:04
  Speaker 1: what's I'm getting another call? But you know what, it's you.
• 1:08:09
  Speaker 1: It's just I don't know, I feel like you just
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: lock in as a mom, you just lock in.
• 1:08:13
  Speaker 2: Lock in, And I'm like this is my life. Now,
• 1:08:16
  Speaker 2: you're just in and out of body experience.
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: But then and soon it'll he'll be like ten or
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 1: fifteen and he'll just be like you, Mom, I'm going
• 1:08:24
  Speaker 1: to the mall if there's still malls, I don't know,
• 1:08:27
  Speaker 1: and you'll be like my son and you can go
• 1:08:30
  Speaker 1: have a margarita in the pool or whatever.
• 1:08:32
  Speaker 2: Look, sometimes I look at you know what I do.
• 1:08:35
  Speaker 2: I look at mom and dad.
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 1: Yeah, look at exactly.
• 1:08:39
  Speaker 2: Yeah. And then hanging out you're chilling. They're going to
• 1:08:42
  Speaker 2: Mexico and I'm tired. Yeah. Yeah, It's like that's awesome.
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, yeah, there's there's gonna it's.
• 1:08:50
  Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, do it now, all for twenty years from now.
• 1:08:53
  Speaker 2: Well and then you know, like I command mom and
• 1:08:56
  Speaker 2: dad too with like and like and my in law.
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 2: It's like, it's so awesome that I want to be
• 1:09:02
  Speaker 2: around them. Yeah, And I'm like like, yeah, I could
• 1:09:06
  Speaker 2: nitpick their parenting things whatever all day, but at the
• 1:09:11
  Speaker 2: end they're winners because.
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: We're like, well, yeah, yeah, exactly.
• 1:09:17
  Speaker 2: It still made you and you're like, okay, Like the
• 1:09:20
  Speaker 2: amount of times I like, I have two boys, right,
• 1:09:23
  Speaker 2: and I'm like I'm going to be the mother in law.
• 1:09:26
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah you are.
• 1:09:30
  Speaker 2: But I love my mother in law like my mother.
• 1:09:34
  Speaker 2: My mother in law and I are like very tight.
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 2: So I'm just taking notes. Okay, great from what I
• 1:09:40
  Speaker 2: can tell. As a mother in law, you gotta cook,
• 1:09:43
  Speaker 2: you gotta cook, figure out, you got to get better. Now.
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 2: I'm just come back to me. And you always put
• 1:09:51
  Speaker 2: the daughter in laws first. She will take my side
• 1:09:55
  Speaker 2: every time, no matter how psycho I would be, she
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 2: takes us back. So if you have boys, just know
• 1:10:03
  Speaker 2: you got to be that mother in law.
• 1:10:04
  Speaker 1: I'll be the saucy mother in law. I'm like, you'd
• 1:10:07
  Speaker 1: be him. Let's go by ourselves. Let's he did what before.
• 1:10:11
  Speaker 2: I'm like my little angels, my little boy, Like even
• 1:10:15
  Speaker 2: George and Teddy. Sometimes I'm like when they're baby's like this,
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 2: You're like no, and they say having boys is like
• 1:10:20
  Speaker 2: the slowest breakup ever, Like oh my gosh. But then
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 2: you're just like but then you do what you can
• 1:10:28
  Speaker 2: to just keep them in your life and whatever. It's
• 1:10:32
  Speaker 2: just like yeah, but it's funny. George's too now and
• 1:10:36
  Speaker 2: there's like it's so funny how I'm like I never
• 1:10:39
  Speaker 2: thought that I would like really need a break from him. Yeah, like, mom,
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 2: you said you'd be off it by Yeah, you say, menace.
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 1: Get him out of my life? Where are you toxic?
• 1:10:53
  Speaker 2: Forty five? Yeah? Where so many moms have to wait
• 1:10:55
  Speaker 2: till like six pm for their husbands to get home.
• 1:10:58
  Speaker 1: It is like I'm in a toxic relation. Chip He
• 1:11:00
  Speaker 1: like slaps you, then kisses you, he says, and then
• 1:11:04
  Speaker 1: he's like, I love you, Yeah you did.
• 1:11:06
  Speaker 2: I was like, you can see that video. This is
• 1:11:08
  Speaker 2: a dad being like, give me a kiss and the
• 1:11:10
  Speaker 2: slaps his face and.
• 1:11:13
  Speaker 1: I'm like, wait, that is so toxic and I love it.
• 1:11:19
  Speaker 2: You have like it's like you have Stockholm syndrome. Yeah, yeah,
• 1:11:23
  Speaker 2: You're like whatever, Yeah, that's.
• 1:11:26
  Speaker 1: All right, No, I think yeah, no, I think. Uh,
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: it sounds fun, sounds like a blast, sounds horrifically horrible,
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 1: and also sounds really fun.
• 1:11:38
  Speaker 2: You'll never feel love like you.
• 1:11:40
  Speaker 1: Yeah, And I believe that because I like the amount
• 1:11:43
  Speaker 1: I love my nephews is like like the things I
• 1:11:46
  Speaker 1: would do on their behalf is abhorrent, Like I would
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 1: do a legal kill.
• 1:11:52
  Speaker 2: I would murder for them, and he will do anything
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 2: for me.
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 1:11:56
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I would buy them a country if I could.
• 1:12:00
  Speaker 1: Like yeah, so I can't even imagine.
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 2: Like that, Like I remember feeling like so much love
• 1:12:05
  Speaker 2: for like like my students.
• 1:12:08
  Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you're just kids in general. That's just awesome.
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 2: You're like, you're like, I'm gonna love my kid even
• 1:12:14
  Speaker 2: more than this. Yeah, this what I how like.
• 1:12:19
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I was just hanging up with my my friend's
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 1: baby two days ago, and she's like growing up and
• 1:12:23
  Speaker 1: she's awesome, and she just looks at me and she's
• 1:12:25
  Speaker 1: like and I'm like, your arm in the best way.
• 1:12:29
  Speaker 1: Like I'm just like, oh, I just want to put
• 1:12:32
  Speaker 1: you in my sweater and just.
• 1:12:34
  Speaker 2: Well, and like even my best friend she has her
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 2: she has two kids, but Scottie she's three, and uh
• 1:12:45
  Speaker 2: like she is like like a niece to me, and
• 1:12:49
  Speaker 2: so like what I feel for her, I'm just like,
• 1:12:53
  Speaker 2: this is so cool. And I can't wait for my
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 2: sisters and my brothers to have kids because we just
• 1:12:58
  Speaker 2: have a bunch of nieces and I'm so many more kids.
• 1:13:02
  Speaker 2: I know, as the oldest, I'm like, as the oldest,
• 1:13:05
  Speaker 2: having the first kids of the family. Yeah, I said
• 1:13:08
  Speaker 2: to Adam, I'm like, we have an obligation here. We
• 1:13:12
  Speaker 2: need to raise good kids, the good cousins. All of
• 1:13:16
  Speaker 2: these other kids because we're using our the aunts and
• 1:13:21
  Speaker 2: the uncles and the grandparents like we're using them, they
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 2: have free time for our kids. We're using them, So
• 1:13:27
  Speaker 2: we're going to have to give them free time with
• 1:13:29
  Speaker 2: our kids.
• 1:13:30
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 1:13:31
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that's pressure is not on you, but
• 1:13:34
  Speaker 2: I understand the pressure. Oh I'm going to take that
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 2: pressure because you're going to need a break. You're going
• 1:13:40
  Speaker 2: to need a break. Yeah, they need to go play.
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 2: I keep going.
• 1:13:44
  Speaker 1: No, No, it's good, it's good. No, we went on
• 1:13:46
  Speaker 1: for a long time. It's great, it's great, and Teddy
• 1:13:49
  Speaker 1: was great the whole time. How nice of them newborns?
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 5: We can our next segment, we can go we'll talk
• 1:13:57
  Speaker 5: about how awesome newborns are because they can't move and
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 5: all they do is sleep and ship it will and scream.
• 1:14:05
  Speaker 2: The scream scream it has learned ship or too. So
• 1:14:09
  Speaker 2: you have to do it for them right right, and
• 1:14:12
  Speaker 2: the sleep is anyways.
• 1:14:14
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a fun. Yeah, well that's yeah. I guess
• 1:14:19
  Speaker 1: final question, if you can go back knowing everything you
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: know now, would you would you do anything differently? Would
• 1:14:27
  Speaker 1: you not do it? And so forth?
• 1:14:32
  Speaker 2: Do anything differently? Ah?
• 1:14:36
  Speaker 1: If not, that's totally fine.
• 1:14:39
  Speaker 2: No, No, I think to do something differently, I probably
• 1:14:43
  Speaker 2: would do not when I say reading, not like going
• 1:14:45
  Speaker 2: through people's tiktoks, like actual like reading okay toddler, Yeah,
• 1:14:53
  Speaker 2: reading like a toddler book right now, like how to
• 1:14:55
  Speaker 2: deal with toddlers right and all toddlers are. But the
• 1:15:01
  Speaker 2: information that it gives you, yes, for sure it helps.
• 1:15:06
  Speaker 2: But the sense of confidence it gives you because you're
• 1:15:11
  Speaker 2: doing the extra work know power yourself. It's I find
• 1:15:17
  Speaker 2: that I'm slowly even like I've noticed in the last
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 2: few days. Yeah, sure, I'll still like snap George a
• 1:15:22
  Speaker 2: little bit, but like I'm starting to be like, hmm,
• 1:15:27
  Speaker 2: it's like I have this understanding it. It's like that's fair.
• 1:15:30
  Speaker 2: I can tap into something else. I feel more confident.
• 1:15:34
  Speaker 1: That's fair. Any recommendations right now?
• 1:15:37
  Speaker 2: I have this one and I'm reading Transforming Toddler's come
• 1:15:44
  Speaker 2: Back for Ages one to five, how to handle tantrums
• 1:15:46
  Speaker 2: and power struggles and raise resilient kids without losing your mind.
• 1:15:50
  Speaker 1: Oh it's pretty good. It's pretty good.
• 1:15:53
  Speaker 2: It's the one thing. But like like even if like
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 2: I mean, the information is, it's more just how you
• 1:16:00
  Speaker 2: how you can deal with stuff as a parent, just
• 1:16:04
  Speaker 2: have that confidence to attack it.
• 1:16:06
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's fair.
• 1:16:09
  Speaker 2: That's been thing differently, don't expect anything with your kids.
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 2: Don't expect that they'll be good eaters, don't expect to
• 1:16:18
  Speaker 2: be good sleepers. Don't expect.
• 1:16:21
  Speaker 1: Uh, expect the worst and then they'll be great. Just
• 1:16:24
  Speaker 1: expect them to come out like the spawn of Satan.
• 1:16:27
  Speaker 2: And then whether or not days are long, years or short,
• 1:16:31
  Speaker 2: take it day by day. Do the best you can
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 2: do at that time. If you're going off three hours
• 1:16:37
  Speaker 2: of sleep to do your best, don't get yourself.
• 1:16:40
  Speaker 1: That's fair.
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 2: But would I do it again? In a heartbeat? Yeah,
• 1:16:44
  Speaker 2: in a heartbeats and even how hard it is now
• 1:16:46
  Speaker 2: I'm like, and how expensive it is, how crazy it is?
• 1:16:50
  Speaker 2: I I yeah, I love it.
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: You feel for.
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 2: Life?
• 1:16:56
  Speaker 1: All right, I'll take this and it'd be great. You're
• 1:17:00
  Speaker 1: going to do great, and I'll think about it more.
• 1:17:03
  Speaker 1: If you thought this was like an announcement or something,
• 1:17:05
  Speaker 1: You're wrong. It's not. It's not. I'm literally this was
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: literally to convince me or not convince me. No kidding me,
• 1:17:12
  Speaker 1: but no, it's not an announcement at all. I just
• 1:17:14
  Speaker 1: know it's Uh. I just see a lot of mom
• 1:17:16
  Speaker 1: stuff lately. And then I'm like, oh, my sister's a
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 1: mom and I talked to her every day. So also,
• 1:17:20
  Speaker 1: I didn't do this against her will. By the way,
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 1: she was totally.
• 1:17:24
  Speaker 2: Happy to talk about it, willing to do this.
• 1:17:27
  Speaker 1: I think it was actually kind of therapy.
• 1:17:29
  Speaker 2: You that's really all you talk about it.
• 1:17:32
  Speaker 1: Yeah, it'll become my personality. I'm fully ready for that. Like,
• 1:17:35
  Speaker 1: what else are you going to talk about? That's your day,
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: that's like my content. All my content is now, like
• 1:17:39
  Speaker 1: about my nephew. Nothing else goes on in my life,
• 1:17:42
  Speaker 1: my husband or my nephew. So I totally get that.
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 1: That's fair.
• 1:17:45
  Speaker 2: It does become your personality.
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: Yeah, that's fine.
• 1:17:49
  Speaker 2: Okay, don't worry. Your village will come to you. We'll
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 2: come and thank goodness, it'll be great.
• 1:17:55
  Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll see why you keep saying that, like I'm
• 1:17:57
  Speaker 1: not having a kid right now. By the way, he'll
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 1: be great. Stand up, show him.
• 1:18:06
  Speaker 2: Now in whatever and however long you decide.
• 1:18:09
  Speaker 1: To Yeah, we'll see. Maybe it's next year, maybe it's
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: five years from now. I have no idea or not
• 1:18:14
  Speaker 1: at all. We'll see, and you guys will never know.
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 1: I'll just show up with a kid. One day, but
• 1:18:18
  Speaker 1: you will never see them.
• 1:18:21
  Speaker 2: Yeah I'm not already have one.
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: You don't know. You know anyway, thank you for doing this,
• 1:18:28
  Speaker 1: thank you for having me and moms in the comments.
• 1:18:31
  Speaker 1: Be nice and also help each other out. Let's make
• 1:18:33
  Speaker 1: it a nice safe space to talk about being a
• 1:18:35
  Speaker 1: mom in the struggles and all that. And try to
• 1:18:37
  Speaker 1: convince me in the comments or not. Just talk about
• 1:18:40
  Speaker 1: whatever you want in the comments. And if you're me
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: and my sister, I'll hunt you down and i will