Latest / BECOME Empowered / Traveling with Gumption: Courage Is a Question You Ask
Transcript
- Sabine Kvenberg: Picture this. I'm standing at the entrance of the Frankfurt Book Fair. Thousands of publishers, halls so big you need a map, and comfortable shoes. Every language you can imagine floating through the air. And there I am. One woman, one bag, and in that bag, a copy of my book, GUMPTION To tell you the truth, I was a little intimidated. It felt like I don't belong there. At least, these are the voices in my head. I didn't know yet how that day would end. I didn't know if anybody would care. All I knew was I'm Sabine Kwenberg, and today it's just you and me. No guest, just a story I've been bursting to tell you since I landed back home in Florida. From the end of September to the middle of October, I traveled through Germany and Italy. And the whole time I gave the journey a name: Traveling with Gumption. And that title has two meanings. Meaning number one: traveling alone takes gumption Walking into a book fair where nobody knows your name takes gumption Going up to a stranger and saying, Hey, tell me what you do. And can I tell you about my book? Takes Gumption. Well, meaning number two is a little more literal. I had Gumption with me everywhere I went. My memoir, Gumption, Sacred Whispers, Bold Moves, and the Courage to Become. It rode in my suitcase. It sat on coffee tables. It came alongside to the theater where my career began. So one GUMPTION lived my bag. The other one had to live in my chest. And here is what I learned throughout my life. Courage is not a feeling you wait for. Courage is a question you ask, a bold move you make, even if you don't know the how yet. I used to think I needed to feel brave first, and then I'd act. On this trip, I remembered. What I discovered over the years. It works the other way around. You ask the question, you make the inquiry, you take the step, and the feeling of courage shows up after, like the applause after the song. So let me show you what I mean in four acts. Act one, the Frankfurt Book Fair. Let's go back to that entrance in Frankfurt. The Frankfurt Book Fair is the biggest gathering of the publishing world on the planet. Rights directors, publishers, agents, translators, everybody who decides which story cross which borders. I walked in with one vision: to get GUMPTION one step closer to being translated into German. A book about a girl from Hamburg who found her courage. I wanted it to come home in her mother tongue. But here's my confession. I had no idea how to do it, no roadmap and no appointments. So I did the only thing I could do. I started walking the halls. And I started conversations. Some of those conversations led me to agencies that market books like mine. I did book signings and I walked right up to the biggest publisher's booth. Not with a pitch, but with a question for whoever sat at the reception desk. Who is the person I should contact about book signing? Who handles foreign rights? That's it. That was my gumption. No appointment. Just the courage to ask a stranger at a desk for a name and an email address. And by the end of the day, I had a whole collection of contacts to follow up with. And then came the very last booth. That's where I met. And I didn't walk up and say, Do you do translations? We simply had a conversation. And it started on a human-to-human basis. I was almost ready to go home when I passed the last booth. I saw this woman giving a yawn, and I simply said, It must be a hard day. I see you are tired. And we both laughed. And then we had a conversation. We talked about what she did. I asked her what she does, how she got started. And then we just kept asking each other questions. And we realized we had so much in common. We both immigrate to a new country We came from different countries. We both had a passion for music. And we both connected on that human level first. And then I asked if she does translation. And she said, I sure do. So I gave her my book. I told her about my dream having this book translated into German because this is my root. This is where I grew up. This is where. I learned gumption she also gave me her book, her story, and we signed each other's book. And at the end, she said, I would be honored to translate your book. That's it. No contract, no details, just a door that opened. And when I left, I Felt great. And that's what I'm talking about. The courage and the feeling comes afterwards. You see, only after that real connection did the idea of translation even came up. Now, here is the thing I want you to hear. The biggest opportunity of the whole fair didn't Come from a pitch. It came from curiosity, from asking about her before I ever ask about my book. The yes was hiding behind the question. And sometimes the question isn't can you help me? It's tell me about you. Before we head to Italy, I have a question for you. And yes, it takes a little gumption to answer it. Have you ever thought my story could change someone's life? But I don't have time to write a whole book. This month I carried one book across Germany, and everywhere it went, it opened a conversation. That's what a story in print does. It travels to places you never could. So here is your invitation to step into the spotlight. I'm gathering a circle of entrepreneurs for my new book, Become Empowered Entrepreneur. And there's a chapter waiting with your name on it. One powerful story, your voice, your lessons, in the hands of readers who need to hear them. You don't need the whole stage. You just need your moment and the gumption to say yes. Find out more at the link in the show notes or go to sabinekvenberg.com/resources forward slash resources. Your story deserves to travel. Now, let's go to Italy. Act 2. 60 years of friendship and our first vacation. Act 2 is a love story, a friendship love story. I have a girlfriend, Sabrina, whom I have known for 60 years. 60! We have been through childhood, careers, an ocean between us, every season of life. And do you know what we had never done in all those 60 years? We had never gone. On vacation together. Not once. So while I was in Europe, I asked, why not now? And we booked a tour together. And that was Germany for three days and Italy for five. Now, anyone who has ever traveled with a friend knows you learn a lot about a person on vacation. Who wakes up early, who needs coffee before conversation. Who wants to see every church? Who wants to sit in the piazza and watch the world go by? I still remember one moment. We did a trip with a boat. We did a hour walk to that one place that was supposed to be beautiful to have lunch. So we ended up there and it was very simple, but it was directly on the water. We had a table so close that I could hear the splash. I could almost Feel the water. But that moment was serene. We sat, we had a beautiful lunch, and we didn't talk much, just enjoyed each other's company. And here's what I learned. Even after 60 years, there was still more of her to discover. And more of me too. Friendship, it turns out, needs gumption as well. The courage to say, Let's do the thing we've never done. And Italy, Italy. I stood there thinking, I almost didn't ask. We had so many wonderful trips to a place called Garda doing a boat trip, walking in the woods, visiting a winery. So many beautiful memories that we created on that trip. It was almost like catching up the 30 years that we lived apart, just a big ocean between us, and only able to see each other every other year or so. Now we created more memories. Act three coming home. Act three is quieter. You see, I lived in the United States for about 35 years. And when you live that far from where you were born, every visit home carries a little extra weight. You noticed who has slowed down. You notice the new faces. You notice how fast time is moving. This trip, I got to be with my family. We sat together, we had meals together, we celebrated my brother-in-law's birthday. I spent time with my nephew and my nieces and my dad, who is up there. And I see him slowing down too. So every time I spend with him is extra special. And maybe this is the gentlest kind of gumption Not the courage to walk into a book fair, the courage to slow down, to be fully present, to ask the questions we keep postponing. How are you really? Tell me that story again. Because some inquiries aren't about business at all. They are about not leaving anything unsaid. Let me tell you, lately I've been thinking about my dad is the last one in my family who has any memory about me growing up. My mom passed away many years back. My aunt and uncle. Passed away a few years ago. And the only one who saw me growing up, who saw me changing careers, who saw me immigrating to the United States, is my dad. I still have my sister, she knows a little bit, my baby sister is nine years younger. Than I am. So, especially the first few years, she doesn't even have memories of me. So, my dad is the only one. And I took time to ask him some questions. I took time to reminisce those times we spent together on vacation and holidays. And it was a Beautiful time. That slowing down sometimes takes gumption too. Act four, Hamburg, back where it all began. The full circle, so to speak. Before I flew home, I gave myself a little tour of Hamburg. Not the tourist Hamburg. My Hamburg, the Hamburg where I got my start as a performer. I walked to the Alley Theater, the Theater for Kinder, the theater for children. This is where I played my first major role, Pippi Longstalking. Pippi Langstrumpf in the very first German production, the musical of Pippi Langstrumpf. The Deutsche Ersterführung. Imagine a young woman with braids sticking straight out sideways, a monkey on her shoulder, and absolutely no permission from anybody to be that bold. And standing in front of that theater, decades later, I realized something. Pippi was my first. Teacher in gumption She lifted her horse over her head. She lived by her own rules. She asked, why not? About everything. And it was so important that role that I embodied and what I've learned from it, that I even shared it in my book. I dedicated a whole chapter. And here's another thing I did. It took gumption to go in there and ask if I could see the theater. You know, it was in the middle of the day. It was not open for a show. So I went up to the to the desk and there was a man. And I told him that I was visiting. I lived in the States and That I played Pippi Longstocking here many, many years back. And I was asking if I could see the theater, because I am recording everything for my documentary. And he said, And he looked at the other man who stood behind him. And then that man said, No, we can't do that because right now they're preparing for the evening show. I said, It's it's okay. I was just wondering. Because I was here and I wrote a book and I have a whole chapter about the character, I played, Pippi Longstalking. And he asked me, when was that? I said, I don't know. So I pulled my book out of the bag and looked at a picture that I had printed in there, and that was a picture of a cover, of a magazine cover that had the year on it. It was nineteen eighty-three. And that man in the background, he picked up a book and he looked through it and he said, I I don't see a picture here, but yes, it was there. My name was written in there. All the actors. It was a book of twenty-five years, Theater für Kinder. And then he came over and gave it to me. And he said, Here you can have it. I said, Really? that was so beautiful. Because the owner who built that theater, who hired me, has passed away But then something miraculously happened. And that, again, because it was a human-to-human conversation. That men in the background came around, opened the door, and said, Well, come on back, I'll guide you to the back. And I knew he was the one who has the permission to do it. And as I later learned, he was the new owner of the theater. yes, you can get somebody in the back to show them around, even if the stage crew is building up the set, right? But of course, when I walked in, I was just a stranger who could say anything to go into the theater, right? Then he showed me around, I was able to see the theater. That was such a beautiful experience. And again, it takes gumption to ask, but it also takes a human-to-human conversation. The next step was the Operettenhaus. The Operettenhaus was owned by the Stadt of Hamburg, the city of Hamburg. And it was later sold to a company that put on major musical productions. I played in the last play, which was a German musical, Große Freiheit Nummer 7, that was based on the movie. And I played with an icon. Who also played a character in the movie and now played the main character in the musical Große Freiheit Nummer 7, Freddie Quinn, who was a very famous singer and performer of the northern area. And so I thought it was fun to see it again. And yeah, that is where I began my career. And then there was another theater, a couple other theaters I played in Hamburg. But I didn't have the time to visit it all. But the major one for me was the Pippi Longstocking And I thought about that young performer. She didn't know she'd move to America. She didn't know she'd run a performing art school for nearly three decades, or write a memoir, or stand on stage as a speaker. She just said yes to the next role. She stepped onto the next stage. And there I was, with GUMPTION my bag bringing her. story home. That's what going back taught me. you go back to remember who you were when you were brave without even knowing it. Now, it's your turn. I don't want you to just listen to my trip. I want you to take your own little journey with gumption right now. Well, if you're driving, keep your eyes on the road and do this in your head. Everyone else, if you feel invited to do so, grab a pen or open the Note app on your phone. Here is a framework I lived on this trip. I call it Ask. The A stands for approach. Take one step toward the person, the room, or the opportunity. In Frankfurt, that meant walking up to the booth S stands for speak your curiosity. Lead with a question about them. What do you publish? What do you do? Opens more doors than any pitch. And K, keep the door open. Swap the book, the card, the contact, follow up. Carla and I traded books. That's a door that stays open. How does it look for you? So now write this down. One question you've been afraid to ask. Maybe it's to a client, a publisher, an event organizer, maybe it's to someone you love. Shall we finally take that trip? Got it? Now, next to it, write the name of the person you'll ask, and the day you'll ask them. Now I can hear some of you may say, Sabine, that's lovely, but you are a performer. You are used to the spotlight. I'm not a book fair person. I'm not a walk-up to strangers person. And you are right to wonder that. But here's the truth. I was nervous too. The stage experience didn't make the fear disappear. It just taught me that the fear doesn't get a vote. Your book fair might be a networking breakfast, a LinkedIn message, a phone call to an old friend. The size of the stage doesn't matter. The step does. So here's your path for the next seven days. Today, ask the one question you wrote down. Then midweek, ask one more, a new person, a new door. And the end of the week, Keep one door open, send the follow-up. I went to Germany with GUMPTION in my bag. I came home with a translation offer, a deeper friendship, time with family, and a reunion with the young performer I used to be. Not because I felt brave, because I asked. So wherever you're headed this week, pack your GUMPTION. Both kinds. And step into your next scene. If this episode moved you, grab your copy of GUMPTION at your favorite bookstore or on Amazon. I will share the link in the show notes. And share this episode with one friend who needs a little courage this week. I'm Sabine Kwenberg. And until the next time, stay curious, stay bold and keep traveling with gumption