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THE DISCLAIMER: Footy Stars · The Hauraki Big Show

• 0:00
  Speaker 1: For all you mad bastards loving the big show podcast
• 0:05
  Speaker 1: get up even closer.
• 0:06
  Speaker 2: On instagram youtube and tiktok or raw doggies four to
• 0:11
  Speaker 2: seven every weekday on radio.
• 0:15
  Speaker 1: Oh good day fellas backbone hello Jeez, we had some
• 0:19
  Speaker 1: technical dramas. It's going to be a slightly shorter potty today,
• 0:24
  Speaker 1: so we need to talk really quickly, okay?
• 0:26
  Speaker 3: Well, no, I think we just do the shorter but
• 0:28
  Speaker 3: the same sort of speed.
• 0:30
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 0:31
  Speaker 4: But we just ramp up the quality of the chair.
• 0:33
  Speaker 2: Right, okay.
• 0:34
  Speaker 3: So it's like a concentrated sort of like this is
• 0:39
  Speaker 3: really good, shorter but it's really good.
• 0:41
  Speaker 1: Really focused. Yeah.
• 0:42
  Speaker 2: Sometimes shorter is good, you know?
• 0:44
  Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree with.
• 0:44
  Speaker 5: You, man.
• 0:45
  Speaker 4: But not height-wise.
• 0:48
  Speaker 1: Well, I mean, it depends if you're a scrum half,
• 0:49
  Speaker 1: it is.
• 0:50
  Speaker 2: That's true.
• 0:51
  Speaker 1: You know, you don't want to be a massive six-foot
• 0:54
  Speaker 1: scrum half, Keezy.
• 0:55
  Speaker 4: You know Jase can't pass with his left hand, man?
• 0:57
  Speaker 6: I do.
• 0:58
  Speaker 4: Have you noticed that?
• 0:59
  Speaker 2: It's a sore spot.
• 1:00
  Speaker 4: We've been chucking around the footy, and it's like, Jase,
• 1:01
  Speaker 4: pass with your left hand. And he's like, I can't.
• 1:03
  Speaker 4: But he won't even try, man.
• 1:04
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, well, like, Keezy's trying to get me into
• 1:07
  Speaker 1: a social rugby team.
• 1:09
  Speaker 2: No, prems.
• 1:09
  Speaker 1: Prems.
• 1:10
  Speaker 2: Well, he's not. He's just annoying you with it.
• 1:12
  Speaker 1: Yeah. And I know that if I actually played a
• 1:15
  Speaker 1: game of rugby... I'd have a heart attack within five minutes.
• 1:19
  Speaker 1: Someone would deduge me and I'd be like, I wouldn't
• 1:23
  Speaker 1: get up again.
• 1:23
  Speaker 5: One of those things when you're at school and you're
• 1:25
  Speaker 5: just like, oh, I hope that guy gets it because
• 1:27
  Speaker 5: I can smash him.
• 1:28
  Speaker 2: Yeah, I could smack him. That guy I can smash.
• 1:29
  Speaker 5: 100%.
• 1:30
  Speaker 2: When you know it. And then that person gets the
• 1:32
  Speaker 2: ball and everybody just goes, yay!
• 1:35
  Speaker 5: And they try and smash that person. My mate used
• 1:39
  Speaker 5: to be like that, and he'd just throw the ball
• 1:40
  Speaker 5: over his head.
• 1:41
  Speaker 4: Oh, the ultimate coward move. The runaway throw the ball
• 1:44
  Speaker 4: over your head.
• 1:44
  Speaker 2: It was smart.
• 1:45
  Speaker 3: Just quickly, Jase, so you're not keen to play a
• 1:48
  Speaker 3: season of prems at halfback?
• 1:49
  Speaker 1: No.
• 1:50
  Speaker 4: Because college rifles are interested.
• 1:52
  Speaker 1: I remember the amount of grief I used to get
• 1:54
  Speaker 1: doing umpiring, and that was just through Moon TV. And,
• 1:57
  Speaker 1: you know, it's very hard to be taken seriously.
• 2:01
  Speaker 4: But that's as a rare for umpire.
• 2:02
  Speaker 5: I'm just imagining you putting the ball in the scrub
• 2:04
  Speaker 5: and taking an eternity to get round to the number
• 2:06
  Speaker 5: eight's feet.
• 2:07
  Speaker 2: Exactly.
• 2:08
  Speaker 1: Exactly. And because I'm a top radio DJ, I'd be targeted, Keezy.
• 2:13
  Speaker 2: You could commentate it as you went.
• 2:16
  Speaker 1: When he spins it wide to Keezy on the burst.
• 2:19
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because I'll play with you.
• 2:22
  Speaker 2: He'll also play in the Prims.
• 2:24
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he'll be on the wing. Sure. In really tight shorts.
• 2:28
  Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, 100%. Why tight shorts?
• 2:31
  Speaker 1: And never get the ball.
• 2:32
  Speaker 2: No, that's right. Just freezing, just teeth chattering.
• 2:34
  Speaker 1: Yeah, you're just chattering.
• 2:36
  Speaker 2: Hugging yourself.
• 2:37
  Speaker 4: But my jersey's nice and clean.
• 2:38
  Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah. 100%.
• 2:39
  Speaker 1: You don't get dirty or ever go on the ground
• 2:42
  Speaker 1: the entire match.
• 2:43
  Speaker 4: What position did you play, Mogi?
• 2:45
  Speaker 5: I played, excuse me, second five in wing, and then
• 2:50
  Speaker 5: they put me at fullback. Wow.
• 2:52
  Speaker 2: Which was a nightmare.
• 2:54
  Speaker 4: I hate fullbacks.
• 2:54
  Speaker 2: Because I was so unfit.
• 2:57
  Speaker 6: Yeah.
• 2:57
  Speaker 4: And also when someone breaks through.
• 2:59
  Speaker 2: For that.
• 2:59
  Speaker 4: And it's like, oh, cool, so I'm just going to.
• 3:02
  Speaker 2: I distinctly remember one of those occasions, actually, Keezy.
• 3:05
  Speaker 5: Distinctly remember that.
• 3:08
  Speaker 4: They score between the posts?
• 3:09
  Speaker 5: Well, it was one of those ones where you can
• 3:10
  Speaker 5: either go, it was a two-on-one. So it was a
• 3:13
  Speaker 5: simple case of draw and pass. What did you go for?
• 3:15
  Speaker 2: I went for the intercept.
• 3:17
  Speaker 4: Did he dummy it or pass it?
• 3:19
  Speaker 2: He passed it. He did pass it at least. Yeah, right, okay.
• 3:23
  Speaker 5: But that always sticks with me. I should have put
• 3:26
  Speaker 5: one of them down. One of the guy's names was
• 3:28
  Speaker 5: Omar Hidani. I should have just smashed him.
• 3:33
  Speaker 1: Yeah.
• 3:33
  Speaker 2: I went to school with him. I went to primary
• 3:35
  Speaker 2: school with him.
• 3:35
  Speaker 5: If he hears this, just know you'd be saying, oh,
• 3:38
  Speaker 5: at the moment he'd be saying, oh, you couldn't smash me, Mikey.
• 3:40
  Speaker 5: I would have absolutely smashed you to pieces, Omar, and.
• 3:43
  Speaker 2: You'd know it.
• 3:44
  Speaker 4: What year was this?
• 3:46
  Speaker 2: Oh, should we go back a ways now, there and there?
• 3:49
  Speaker 4: What would that be?
• 3:50
  Speaker 1: 93?
• 3:50
  Speaker 5: Yeah, Omar.
• 3:51
  Speaker 6: 1993.
• 3:51
  Speaker 2: How old were you, Keezy?
• 3:51
  Speaker 1: Five.
• 3:52
  Speaker 5: Two.
• 3:52
  Speaker 2: Two.
• 3:59
  Speaker 3: The Hauraki Big Show, weekdays from 4 on Radio Hauraki.
• 4:04
  Speaker 1: Oh, g'day, Matt.
• 4:06
  Speaker 6: Oh, hi, mate.
• 4:07
  Speaker 3: Yeah.
• 4:07
  Speaker 6: Look, if you want the chance to win all our
• 4:10
  Speaker 6: on-air competitions and stuff and get amongst the live conversation,
• 4:15
  Speaker 6: tune in to the Hauraki Big Show, four to seven
• 4:18
  Speaker 6: weekdays on Radio Hauraki and iHeartRadio.
• 4:23
  Speaker 3: The Hauraki Big Show podcast.
• 4:26
  Speaker 4: Why don't we line up you and Omar again and
• 4:28
  Speaker 4: we can replay it?
• 4:28
  Speaker 2: We should do it again.
• 4:29
  Speaker 4: And so Hoity J, was Omar the one passing or catching?
• 4:32
  Speaker 2: Catching.
• 4:32
  Speaker 3: So what we'll do is we'll have Hoity J running,
• 4:35
  Speaker 3: passing it to Omar.
• 4:36
  Speaker 5: Yeah, Jase, I just need you to throw one up
• 4:38
  Speaker 5: so he has to catch it over his head and
• 4:40
  Speaker 5: it just opens up his ribs.
• 4:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, so he can hammer it. You've just reminded me
• 4:45
  Speaker 1: of a situation. I used to play flanker. And I
• 4:52
  Speaker 1: remember there was one game we had our biggest.
• 4:53
  Speaker 2: How old were you when you were playing flanker?
• 4:55
  Speaker 1: Seventh form. with third formers, and it was the biggest
• 5:00
  Speaker 1: crowd that we'd had on the sidelines at home.
• 5:02
  Speaker 5: Four.
• 5:03
  Speaker 1: No, there was quite a number, and we were winning
• 5:06
  Speaker 1: by two points with about one or two minutes to go.
• 5:11
  Speaker 2: You butchered it.
• 5:12
  Speaker 1: And this guy got a break, and I heroically– as
• 5:16
  Speaker 1: the last man standing sprinted after him and was about
• 5:20
  Speaker 1: to dedouche him in the corner and he just sidestepped
• 5:22
  Speaker 1: me and scored under the bar. And we lost the game.
• 5:26
  Speaker 1: I remember that so well and everyone was just going, oh, fuck, Jase.
• 5:31
  Speaker 4: What did you do? Did you dive?
• 5:33
  Speaker 1: He was going down the sideline and I was– Cutting across.
• 5:36
  Speaker 4: And he stepped in.
• 5:38
  Speaker 2: And he just went douche. And I just stopped and went, oh.
• 5:42
  Speaker 1: He did me. He totally did me.
• 5:44
  Speaker 4: Far out.
• 5:45
  Speaker 1: But it was because I was running at full tip.
• 5:47
  Speaker 2: Yeah.
• 5:48
  Speaker 1: So that when he changed direction, I was like, oh.
• 5:51
  Speaker 6: I was fucked.
• 5:51
  Speaker 2: You're committed.
• 5:52
  Speaker 4: They always step in. And it always works. It always works.
• 5:55
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 5:55
  Speaker 4: Don't know why.
• 5:56
  Speaker 3: So this is why when we play College Rifles next season,
• 6:00
  Speaker 3: which is coming up soon, actually. No, it's next year,
• 6:03
  Speaker 3: going into winter. You'll be able to redo that and
• 6:07
  Speaker 3: fucking nail it, man.
• 6:07
  Speaker 2: You just have to start doing your shuttles, Jase, running
• 6:09
  Speaker 2: your shuttles. You'll have to do the beep test.
• 6:13
  Speaker 4: I'll get you a headgear.
• 6:14
  Speaker 2: Oh, you're going to need a headgear.
• 6:16
  Speaker 4: Yeah, a mouthguard. Do you want shoulder pads?
• 6:20
  Speaker 1: Yeah, probably.
• 6:21
  Speaker 4: We'll get the full American.
• 6:22
  Speaker 1: Football gridiron kind of look.
• 6:24
  Speaker 2: Need support.
• 6:25
  Speaker 3: Some of the kids when I used to play war,
• 6:28
  Speaker 3: and even through high school, wore shoulder pads and shit. Yeah.
• 6:31
  Speaker 5: There was a period there, especially with the NRL, where
• 6:33
  Speaker 5: they were doing that, and then they got rid of them.
• 6:35
  Speaker 4: Yeah, because it looks fucking weird.
• 6:36
  Speaker 1: Did you guys play with any guys that went on
• 6:39
  Speaker 1: to do really well? I played with a guy. He
• 6:42
  Speaker 1: was in the first 15, but he was two years
• 6:45
  Speaker 1: younger than me called Slade McFarland.
• 6:47
  Speaker 4: Oh, yeah, he was good.
• 6:48
  Speaker 2: Was he Taranaki?
• 6:49
  Speaker 1: Yeah, no, Blues. He played the Blues. Did he? Yeah,
• 6:52
  Speaker 1: for quite a while.
• 6:53
  Speaker 4: He could play the Blues?
• 6:54
  Speaker 1: He played for the Blues. I'm pretty sure it was
• 6:56
  Speaker 1: the Blues.
• 6:57
  Speaker 2: And he played.
• 6:59
  Speaker 1: At school, he was like a unit. He was a hooker.
• 7:02
  Speaker 1: He was a big guy. But then when he left school,
• 7:04
  Speaker 1: he just went douche and became this enormous man.
• 7:10
  Speaker 2: Oh, no, that's not who I was thinking about at all.
• 7:12
  Speaker 3: I think I played against Sam Cade once.
• 7:14
  Speaker 5: Right.
• 7:15
  Speaker 3: Before he was like, yeah, he was probably like 14
• 7:18
  Speaker 3: or some shit.
• 7:19
  Speaker 2: That's it.
• 7:20
  Speaker 1: I played against a few good cricketers. Adam Porori I
• 7:24
  Speaker 1: played against.
• 7:24
  Speaker 2: Porori. Do you know he climbs Mount Everest?
• 7:27
  Speaker 1: He was so, he played for St. Kent's.
• 7:30
  Speaker 2: Hatable.
• 7:33
  Speaker 4: I get that vibe about him. He must have been hot.
• 7:35
  Speaker 1: He was a good-looking fella, and he had all the gear.
• 7:38
  Speaker 2: Oh, yeah. And he also had some idea as well.
• 7:41
  Speaker 1: Yeah, he was a good player, but he just rocked
• 7:43
  Speaker 1: me up the wrong way.
• 7:44
  Speaker 4: Do that to a lot of people, though.
• 7:47
  Speaker 2: You would have been jealous, I'd imagine.
• 7:48
  Speaker 1: Yeah, probably, because I had my flared sort of.
• 7:52
  Speaker 3: Because he looked like shit and sucked at cricket and
• 7:54
  Speaker 3: couldn't climb Everest?
• 7:55
  Speaker 1: Pretty much. Yeah, it's not a great combo you've got
• 7:58
  Speaker 1: down there. To be fair, he hadn't climbed Everest at
• 8:00
  Speaker 1: that point.
• 8:01
  Speaker 2: But you could tell he would. He would. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 8:03
  Speaker 2: And we'd hear all about it. He'd write a book
• 8:05
  Speaker 2: about it.
• 8:06
  Speaker 6: Whoa.
• 8:07
  Speaker 2: Me and Everest.
• 8:08
  Speaker 4: My own personal Everest.
• 8:10
  Speaker 1: With me. Parore.
• 8:11
  Speaker 5: Parore.
• 8:14
  Speaker 4: Parore.
• 8:14
  Speaker 1: Parore.
• 8:15
  Speaker 2: Parore.
• 8:17
  Speaker 4: So you're not keen then on that? Because I'll tell
• 8:18
  Speaker 4: them we're not keen for rugby.
• 8:21
  Speaker 1: Absolutely I'm not keen.
• 8:22
  Speaker 2: 100%. I think you'd be really good.
• 8:25
  Speaker 4: I think so as well, man. You've got one good
• 8:27
  Speaker 4: season left in you. Let's just go and get.
• 8:29
  Speaker 2: Our all, man.
• 8:30
  Speaker 1: One tackle and that would be the end of me.
• 8:31
  Speaker 2: Let me put it to you this way, Jase. What's
• 8:34
  Speaker 2: the downside?
• 8:35
  Speaker 1: Can you... Can you imagine someone smashing me in a tackle?
• 8:39
  Speaker 2: Yes.
• 8:40
  Speaker 1: How I'd react to that?
• 8:41
  Speaker 4: You'd get up and you'd go, all right, mate, that's
• 8:43
  Speaker 4: how we're going to play. Then you'd flatten them next
• 8:45
  Speaker 4: time they got the ball. I know what you're like, man.
• 8:47
  Speaker 4: You're a tough little bastard.
• 8:48
  Speaker 2: You'd be out cold.
• 8:49
  Speaker 4: That's true.
• 8:51
  Speaker 2: I'd nail them. But he can't tackle with his left shoulder.
• 8:54
  Speaker 4: Oh, he doesn't know how.
• 8:55
  Speaker 2: No. Oh, God. So he'd put his head in the
• 8:57
  Speaker 2: wrong place. He's out. Old Hoity J's out again. He's
• 9:02
  Speaker 2: having a little kip on the pitch there.
• 9:05
  Speaker 3: Hey, listen to the big show, full seven-week days.