Latest / Marriage Life and More and Bible Study / The Hidden Cost of Marital Exhaustion Pt 2 (Marriage Reset Series) - 253

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The Hidden Cost of Marital Exhaustion Pt 2 (Marriage Reset Series) - 253 · Marriage Life and More and Bible Study

0:08
Daniel Moore: And that's how Satan wants us to be.
0:09
Daniel Moore: He wants us to be stuck in that rut and he wants us to be stuck in, you know, not having any happiness, not having any of that rest in our life that we need, and he doesn't want us to have.
0:20
Daniel Moore: He doesn't want us to stop and take time to think about what's going on in our life right now, because he knows we'd probably change what we're doing if we really realize what we're doing to ourselves well, it wasn't in their last episode.
0:32
Daniel Moore: He doesn't want us to stop because at that point we're quiet and we can hear that still small voice, so he keeps us busy this week on marriage life and more, we're going to do part two of our second episode of our series on marriage reset roommates to soulmates in your marriage.
0:51
Daniel Moore: We'll be back with that right after this.
0:53
Daniel Moore: Welcome.
1:13
Daniel Moore: Welcome once again to Marriage Life and More.
1:30
Daniel Moore: This is a podcast about marriage, Bible and book studies, and we interview people that have inspiring stories.
1:36
Daniel Moore: I'm Daniel Moore, your host.
1:37
Daniel Moore: I have my beautiful co-host sitting over here, Michelle.
1:40
Michelle Moore: Hey, hey, my wife.
1:42
Daniel Moore: She's here with me this week.
1:43
Daniel Moore: Once again, thank you for joining us.
1:45
Daniel Moore: If you're not familiar with our show, check out our website at wwwmarriagelifeandmorecom.
1:48
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1:54
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1:57
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2:05
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2:07
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2:15
Daniel Moore: Also, I want to mention I don't know that I've mentioned it on this podcast.
2:18
Daniel Moore: I think I did on my other one but we have a blog now on the website.
2:22
Daniel Moore: So every week when we upload a new episode, I'm also uploading a blog post to go along with that.
2:29
Daniel Moore: So it's similar material but just a little bit different.
2:33
Daniel Moore: So if you like to read blogs, they're all probably about a two to three minute read.
2:37
Daniel Moore: For the most part they're not very long, but you can go to our website and there's a link at the top that says blog.
2:42
Daniel Moore: Just click that and you can check out our blogs for each episode each week there on our website.
2:49
Daniel Moore: Well, as I said earlier, we are in part two.
2:52
Daniel Moore: Last week, we started episode two of our series on marriage reset and we did the first half of that and we talked about exhaustion, being tired and how Satan loves that, and we talked about exhaustion being tired and how Satan loves that he wants us to be exhausted because then anything that means anything in our life.
3:10
Daniel Moore: We ignore it and we put all that on the back burner and that's not how God created us to be and the fact that God created us a little bit different, then he must have a solution on how to fix all of that, and that's what we're going to get into this week.
3:23
Daniel Moore: And this week we're going to be doing part two of our second episode of Marriage Reset the Hidden Cost of Marital Exhaustion.
3:31
Daniel Moore: So last week, as we left the episode, we talked about two questions that we need to answer if we feel like that we're exhausted in life, and we were going to talk about those this week.
3:51
Daniel Moore: Well, the first question was what brings you rest?
3:54
Daniel Moore: Now, what's your go to move when you're running on empty?
3:59
Daniel Moore: Do you do like my wife and brew a third cup of ultra strong coffee?
4:04
Daniel Moore: That just came to me right there.
4:07
Daniel Moore: When I read that I was like that's a perfect example, with a couple shots of espresso.
4:11
Daniel Moore: Yes, Scroll endlessly on your phone, chug an energy drink, sneak in a cat nap in the school pickup line or reach for a sugary snack for a quick boost.
4:21
Daniel Moore: Well, while these habits might get us through the next hour, they rarely offer true renewal.
4:28
Michelle Moore: So true.
4:28
Daniel Moore: More often than not they leave us feeling more wired, sluggish or guilty for indulging on empty fixes.
4:34
Daniel Moore: And I know I've got friends that you know that five-hour energy stuff that came out some time back.
4:40
Daniel Moore: People drink that stuff like water.
4:43
Michelle Moore: What do we drink at lunch?
4:45
Daniel Moore: Well, Celsius drinks.
4:47
Michelle Moore: It's still an energy drink, caffeine, yeah, so but that stuff you drink it.
4:56
Daniel Moore: So the Celsius drinks I can drink one of those and it not really affect me any.
4:59
Daniel Moore: But that five-hour energy stuff when you go up and you come back down you feel worse after you come back down, in my opinion, than you did while you were up.
5:10
Daniel Moore: And it doesn't last very long and I know you used to.
5:14
Daniel Moore: I worked third shift and so I'd be up eight or midnight to eight o'clock in the morning is when I worked and I would have to try doing caffeine and different things and man, I felt horrid after taking some of that stuff because it's just, it's so temporary.
5:30
Michelle Moore: Yeah.
5:30
Daniel Moore: It's like it's really short lived and then it's gone.
5:32
Michelle Moore: I'm just going to say the coffee is the best.
5:34
Michelle Moore: Yeah, I mean it may be bad or it may be short lived, it's still amazing.
5:41
Daniel Moore: A good old Americano with some peppermint mocha.
5:43
Daniel Moore: That's the best, best way to go.
5:45
Michelle Moore: Or a latte, a butter pecan latte.
5:50
Daniel Moore: So what exactly brings?
5:51
Michelle Moore: Just so that you guys know, we have our own coffee maker, so we do not definitely go and buy these all the time.
5:58
Michelle Moore: We make our own all the time.
6:00
Michelle Moore: It was a great investment.
6:02
Daniel Moore: Instead of seven brew, it's more brew.
6:03
Daniel Moore: That's so good.
6:08
Daniel Moore: So what actually brings real rest?
6:15
Daniel Moore: You know, I'm sure that's the burning question, because some of us are so exhausted we sleep all night long, we take naps, we do all this stuff but we still feel tired.
6:19
Daniel Moore: Well, rest is taking intentional time to stop, restore your energy and revive your mind and body.
6:26
Daniel Moore: It's meant to be a pause that recharges you, not just a break from work, but a recovery of strength.
6:33
Daniel Moore: The challenge is that rest is often misunderstood.
6:36
Daniel Moore: In our hustle-driven culture it's mistakenly viewed as laziness or a waste of productive time.
6:42
Daniel Moore: Like pressing, pause means you must be off track or unmotivated.
6:47
Daniel Moore: No one wants to seem like they're really slacking, so we avoid true rest and glorify burnout instead.
6:53
Daniel Moore: Rest also gets a bad reputation as being dull or the opposite of fun.
6:59
Daniel Moore: Some even misapply spiritual wisdom, believing that slowing down is dangerous or unspiritual, misunderstanding verses like the one that says idle hands are the devil's workshop.
7:11
Daniel Moore: But rest, when practiced well, is not weakness.
7:14
Daniel Moore: It's how we reconnect with what matters and restore what's been depleted.
7:19
Daniel Moore: It's not about doing nothing.
7:21
Daniel Moore: It's about doing what brings you back to life.
7:24
Daniel Moore: But rest is not laziness.
7:26
Daniel Moore: Consider this explanation from Psychology Today.
7:29
Daniel Moore: They said what rest is?
7:33
Daniel Moore: Regeneration the way your body lives, thrives and survives using the information it receives and creates.
7:40
Daniel Moore: Stop sleep and you can die.
7:43
Daniel Moore: Short-shift sleep and you wreck your ability to learn and remember, increase your chance of stroke and heart attack, set yourself up for colds, mess up your skin and set yourself to gain weight quickly and reliably.
7:56
Daniel Moore: And that's just a passive form of rest.
7:59
Daniel Moore: Sleep Because there's far more the active forms of rest that you consciously control, that react your own regeneration.
8:07
Daniel Moore: There's physical rest, mental rest, social rest, spiritual rest, ways to renew you and restore you as your body rebuilds itself.
8:18
Daniel Moore: In today's high-speed culture, rest is often the first thing we sacrifice to keep up with the demands of work, family and life.
8:30
Daniel Moore: Whether you spend your day in front of a computer or on your feet doing physical labor, your mind and body still need time to recover.
8:34
Daniel Moore: When we push forward without taking time to pause physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, we increase the risk of burnout, physical strain and harm to our closest relationships.
8:45
Daniel Moore: Without rest, it's not just our energy that suffers, our overall well-being starts to unravel.
8:52
Daniel Moore: I will be the first to say because, as we talked last week, you and I are from the generation where we have a very strong work ethic a very strong work ethic.
9:08
Daniel Moore: I don't really care for naps anyway, because they have a tendency to give me a headache.
9:09
Daniel Moore: If I sleep during the day, like that, I don't feel so good when I wake back up, like some people just get regenerated and re-energized whatever the word is whenever they take a nap.
9:19
Daniel Moore: But even if I could take a nap and not get a headache, I think it would be hard for me to do it because I have a problem.
9:28
Daniel Moore: You know, kind of what we're discussing here.
9:30
Daniel Moore: I have a little bit of problem in my mind thinking well, that's time I could be doing something that I get, something else I need to get done.
9:36
Daniel Moore: You know, I feel like not taking a nap is like a waste of time or nothing like that, but it's taking away from time that I need to be doing something different and that mindset is very hard to break really.
9:52
Daniel Moore: You know, I know there's times because I work on computers and stuff in the evenings and on the weekends if I have times where I don't have computer work to do for like a week, and I have all these evenings where I can sit down and maybe watch some TV or spend time where you're at or whatever.
10:09
Daniel Moore: If it goes too long, I start feeling like I'm supposed to be doing something, because I'm so used to doing it all the time.
10:14
Daniel Moore: I'm like there's surely something that I'm not doing right now that needs to be done.
10:18
Daniel Moore: You know, it's like I always got this stuff going on in my mind and as I was, you know, putting this episode together and everything that was coming into place with all of this, I got to thinking and I was like man, you know, I I really probably need to to to think about how I look at things, even in my own mind, because and not that, uh, you know, I don't ever do anything really enough to exhaust me per se or give me burnout or that kind of thing, necessarily, I always try to watch that, but there probably are times that I could, you know, do something to get some more rest.
10:54
Daniel Moore: Probably and I know you, when you take a nap, it re-energizes you.
11:00
Michelle Moore: How often do I take a nap?
11:01
Daniel Moore: You don't get to take them very often I don't really want to take a nap.
11:06
Michelle Moore: The only time I ever want to take a nap is if I mean I mean super exhausted or I have a migraine.
11:12
Michelle Moore: Other than that, I don't.
11:14
Michelle Moore: I'm like you, I got other things to be doing, especially you know.
11:19
Michelle Moore: Just, there's too many things to be done for me to be laying down.
11:23
Michelle Moore: And if I'm laying down and you're like, okay, you lay down, I lay down for a little bit, and you're doing stuff, I'm like heck, no, if he's gonna do stuff, I'm gonna get up and do stuff.
11:34
Michelle Moore: And you're like I told you to lay down and it's like no, and you know it's like I don't, I don't want to take that time and be selfish with that, but there are times when my body says you need need to take a rest, and I know that.
11:46
Michelle Moore: So, but yeah, I mean it is hard to shut that mindset off of go, go, go, do this, do this, when you have other things to get done.
11:55
Daniel Moore: It's hard to balance it.
11:56
Michelle Moore: It is, it really is.
11:57
Daniel Moore: Because you're right.
11:58
Daniel Moore: If I'm sitting down and you're up doing something, I feel like, okay, I'm looking like a lazy husband sitting here.
12:05
Daniel Moore: What is there I need to do, you know?
12:07
Daniel Moore: So I'm looking around.
12:08
Daniel Moore: You know you got trim the tree or whatever.
12:11
Michelle Moore: Oh, whatever, I don't know if I'd go that far.
12:17
Michelle Moore: No, you don't even own a chainsaw.
12:19
Daniel Moore: Well, my pocket knife oh yeah, let's get down and dirty.
12:23
Daniel Moore: We're going to do this the hard way.
12:24
Daniel Moore: Pocket knife oh yeah, let's get down and dirty.
12:25
Michelle Moore: We're going to do this the hard way Well I think that's the reason why God calls for a day of rest.
12:28
Daniel Moore: Yeah.
12:33
Michelle Moore: You know, and and I've always struggled with that, because everybody's like, well, you should have Sunday and you shouldn't do anything.
12:35
Michelle Moore: And I'm like, is that the day of rest, or does he just call for a day of rest?
12:39
Michelle Moore: And I think a lot of people don't even.
12:41
Michelle Moore: They're like, well, Right.
12:47
Michelle Moore: You're having your day of rest and it's so interesting to see different people's aspects of that.
12:53
Michelle Moore: And so, but I think rest is very, very important.
12:57
Daniel Moore: Or is Sunday one of the only days you have off during the week to get all your other stuff done?
13:02
Daniel Moore: I mean, it's A lot of people look at it that way too.
13:04
Daniel Moore: But you know, and even you know, a lot of churches now just go to church on Sunday mornings.
13:10
Daniel Moore: You know, and even you know a lot of churches now just go to church on Sunday mornings, and so you have the afternoon and evening, you know, left to rest.
13:15
Daniel Moore: I guess is what we should be doing.
13:17
Daniel Moore: But you know how many times do we end up out there on the mower.
13:20
Daniel Moore: Or you know, we have other stuff that we have to do and we just didn't have time to do it last week, so we're out there doing it.
13:28
Michelle Moore: Well, and we had a life group.
13:30
Michelle Moore: I mean not during the summer, but throughout the year, it was every other Sunday, you know, because we have life groups at our church and we hosted one, and so we were always preparing for that, you know praying, getting the house ready, baking, cooking, you know, and you know we did that every other Sunday.
13:47
Michelle Moore: So our Sundays were like that.
13:54
Michelle Moore: But I mean, it's just, you fit as much as you possibly can in your whole seven days that you have?
13:56
Daniel Moore: Yeah, and it seems like it's gotten to that point where you have seven days worth of stuff to do constantly.
14:02
Michelle Moore: And what's one thing I asked for throughout, just like out of the seven days.
14:07
Daniel Moore: Just to have one day where we just don't do anything and spend time with each other.
14:10
Michelle Moore: That's my rule.
14:12
Daniel Moore: I say it's a rule, but it's really not because we break it all down so we spend time each other cleaning house and mowing yeah, pretty much Cleaning out the swimming pool.
14:20
Michelle Moore: It's not very often that we get that alone time to just do nothing.
14:24
Michelle Moore: And that's really hard for me, and he knows that.
14:28
Michelle Moore: You know we've talked about it because I'm like out of all the years and everything we do and we're going 20 million different directions, I just want one day, right.
14:37
Daniel Moore: So well.
14:38
Daniel Moore: This is why God encourages us to rest throughout scripture, and you mentioned one earlier.
14:42
Daniel Moore: You know about the seventh day being a day of rest.
14:45
Daniel Moore: On Psalm 46, god also said be still and know that I am God.
14:51
Daniel Moore: But they who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength.
14:54
Daniel Moore: They shall mount up with wings like eagles.
14:56
Daniel Moore: They shall run and not be weary.
14:58
Daniel Moore: They shall walk and not faint.
14:59
Daniel Moore: That's Isaiah 40, verse 31.
15:01
Daniel Moore: Hebrews 4.10,.
15:03
Daniel Moore: For whoever has entered God's rest has also rested from his works, as God did from his.
15:10
Daniel Moore: Again, we have God setting an example of how he wants us to live our lives.
15:15
Daniel Moore: God took a day of rest when he you know the seven days of creation, when he created this world, all of us and the animals, and put everything into it.
15:24
Daniel Moore: It says on the seventh day, god rested, and he was.
15:29
Daniel Moore: I think at that point he was trying to set an example for humanity, for all of us, on how he wanted us to handle our schedules.
15:36
Daniel Moore: But here we are in 2025.
15:40
Daniel Moore: You know, satan's got us running ragged all over the place.
15:43
Daniel Moore: I don't want to say everything that we do is because of Satan, but we are busy.
15:49
Michelle Moore: You know, it's our choices.
15:50
Michelle Moore: Yeah, that's what I was getting ready to say.
15:52
Michelle Moore: It's our own choosing of what you do and what you don't do.
15:55
Daniel Moore: It is.
15:56
Michelle Moore: You know, and that's where I feel like you know, and I'm sitting here thinking you know, don't most people take a sabbatical?
16:02
Michelle Moore: Like if they're in leadership, they take a sabbatical.
16:05
Daniel Moore: Church leadership.
16:06
Daniel Moore: People are real big on that.
16:08
Michelle Moore: Yeah, and you really think about that.
16:09
Michelle Moore: They need that.
16:10
Michelle Moore: They need that time away Time to recharge.
16:13
Michelle Moore: So do we.
16:14
Michelle Moore: That's the reason why, when we talked about in the past about a vision week, you know vision retreat or whatever you want to call it.
16:21
Michelle Moore: You know, to get you and your husband on the same page.
16:24
Michelle Moore: It's like you need that week of rest to know what God's speaking into you and what you guys need to be moving forward with.
16:31
Michelle Moore: So I think it's very, very important.
16:33
Michelle Moore: Rest is very important for a marriage?
16:35
Daniel Moore: Yeah, re-energize those plans that God has put in place.
16:39
Daniel Moore: And you know, jesus consistently demonstrated the importance of rest in his daily routines.
16:43
Daniel Moore: He would often retreat to quiet, remote places to be alone, invited only a few close companions, and made time for meals and celebrations even when there were pressing needs around him.
16:55
Daniel Moore: Rather than always staying on task, he understood the value of stepping away.
17:00
Daniel Moore: On one occasion, jesus even distanced himself from his own disciples.
17:04
Daniel Moore: He also encouraged the same practice in those who followed him.
17:08
Daniel Moore: In Mark 6 31, jesus told his companions to withdraw and find time to rest, because they had been so busy that they didn't even have time to eat.
17:16
Daniel Moore: His actions weren't driven by self-interest, but rather by wisdom, knowing that burnout leads to emptiness.
17:25
Daniel Moore: God's principle is straightforward Slow down, be still trust in him and choose rest.
17:32
Daniel Moore: It's practical, intentional and often goes against the fast-paced values of society.
17:38
Daniel Moore: The thing is, though, real rest requires planning and rhythm.
17:43
Daniel Moore: It means incorporating regular pauses before we reach our breaking point.
17:47
Daniel Moore: It also means finding life-giving practices that restore our energy, our breaking point.
17:52
Daniel Moore: It also means finding life-giving practices that restore our energy.
17:58
Daniel Moore: Rest is not the absence of doing, but rather the presence of renewing.
18:00
Daniel Moore: Some helpful ways to rest and recharge include spending extended quiet time with God, taking a personal retreat which is what you just kind of mentioned, especially with your marriages or simply sitting in stillness to sense God's whisper.
18:10
Daniel Moore: Jesus invites all who are overburdened to come to him for rest, as written in Matthew 11, 28.
18:17
Daniel Moore: Reflect deeply on scripture, not just memorizing it, but embedding it into your spirit through repetition and meditation.
18:25
Daniel Moore: In essence, he's telling us get enough sleep.
18:28
Daniel Moore: Ideally, adults should get at least seven hours each night.
18:32
Daniel Moore: Quality sleep not only helps with functioning during the day, it can even strengthen relationships.
18:38
Daniel Moore: There's a study out from the University of California Berkeley that revealed that couples who sleep well are more likely to show kindness, gratitude and teamwork.
18:48
Daniel Moore: They approach challenges with more patience and understanding.
18:52
Daniel Moore: Laughter can also reset your mind and body.
18:56
Michelle Moore: I do agree with this one.
18:58
Daniel Moore: Yes, it releases natural chemicals that promote well-being and reduce stress.
19:02
Daniel Moore: Listening to music, regardless of what genre, can energize your mind and body.
19:07
Daniel Moore: Spend some time reading, engaging with nature or stepping away from social media to clear mental clutter.
19:13
Daniel Moore: Enjoy a slow walk outdoors.
19:15
Daniel Moore: Dedicate time for relaxing practices like massage or bubble baths, and try to nourish your body with stress-reducing foods.
19:23
Daniel Moore: Avoid using caffeine, which can make you feel more anxious and overstimulated.
19:27
Daniel Moore: Take up calming activities like painting, solving a puzzle or coloring.
19:32
Daniel Moore: Watch a comfort-filled movie, but do it with intention rather than as an escape.
19:37
Daniel Moore: Set aside a weekly Sabbath.
19:45
Daniel Moore: Allow one day each week to truly rest.
19:46
Daniel Moore: Sleep in, unplug from your devices and do things that restore your soul, whether that's cuddling with a pet, playing music, stretching or walking your dog.
19:51
Daniel Moore: Make rest a non-ling.
19:51
Daniel Moore: With a pet playing music, stretching or walking your dog, make rest a non-negotiable part of your rhythm.
19:55
Daniel Moore: Goodness, that's brutal.
20:00
Michelle Moore: One day, that's tough, one day.
20:03
Daniel Moore: Yeah, that's speaking to all of us.
20:05
Michelle Moore: Yeah, it actually is.
20:07
Daniel Moore: And you know it's, I don't know, I do, like you said, with you know, with the laughter and getting the sleep there's, there's certain things that we do that our human body, as a natural reflex, it releases, you know, endorphins and different kinds of chemicals in our body.
20:26
Daniel Moore: That actually does reenergize us and helps us to be able to function on a better level and be able to do the things that we need to do.
20:38
Daniel Moore: And I think you know, for us we do have the capability of getting, you know, seven to eight hours of sleep a night, typically, except for our dogs.
20:46
Daniel Moore: We have two dogs that sleep with us and one's a half human and one of them yeah, he thinks the whole bed is his and it's a king size bed.
20:55
Michelle Moore: And let me tell you.
20:55
Daniel Moore: Oh, my goodness.
20:56
Michelle Moore: He's what 45, 40 pounds.
20:59
Daniel Moore: Yeah, about 40 pounds.
21:00
Daniel Moore: Yeah, 35 to 40.
21:01
Michelle Moore: I mean that dog lays like a half human in our bed and he does not.
21:05
Daniel Moore: He loves to cuddle.
21:06
Michelle Moore: Yes.
21:08
Daniel Moore: Shoves himself right up against your back, right up under your ribs, just wherever he can find a spot.
21:13
Daniel Moore: And then our little chihuahua he's just as bad.
21:16
Daniel Moore: He's not little, he's 15 pounds 15 to 18 pounder.
21:21
Michelle Moore: He's not a little chihuahua.
21:24
Daniel Moore: He's bigger, but I will say there's.
21:25
Daniel Moore: You know, if I don't get enough sleep or if I'm having some bad time, you know, for a while I'm not seeing any happiness in my life or having any laughter, I can, I can relate to that.
21:38
Daniel Moore: You know, at times in my life when I've been through situations like that or or whatever, it just they kind of shuts you down, you know, and you just kind of react to everything at that point and it could be bad or a good reaction.
21:51
Daniel Moore: A lot of times it's not probably so good because we're irritated, we have an irritation going on and you know all that kind of stuff sets in and that's how Satan wants us to be.
22:02
Daniel Moore: He wants us to be stuck in that rut and he wants us to be stuck in, you know, not having any happiness, not having any of that rest in our life that we need, and you know not have any happiness, not having any of that rest in our life that we need no-transcript.
22:24
Michelle Moore: He doesn't want us to stop because at that point we're quiet and we can hear that still small voice.
22:30
Michelle Moore: So he keeps us busy and like I mean I think about laughter and I think you know, you some of your jokes.
22:40
Michelle Moore: He'll say something oh my gosh, and it's so dumb that I'll just laugh and he'll just look at me and then start laughing.
22:49
Michelle Moore: And I'm just you do that to irritate me and it's just it's so funny but my goodness, I laugh.
22:56
Michelle Moore: We have such a great time.
22:57
Michelle Moore: I love to hear Dean laugh and it just, you know, it's just one of the soul things for me.
23:02
Michelle Moore: That is just like, oh my gosh, he's laughing and it just, it excites me as to the point like I smiling, like okay, what is it going to come up with now?
23:11
Michelle Moore: But I think laughter does your soul so good, whether it's with a girlfriend, a friend, whatever it may be.
23:18
Michelle Moore: Do something crazy, do something you've never done, but have a good laughter, make somebody laugh.
23:24
Daniel Moore: Like they say, laughter is good medicine.
23:26
Daniel Moore: I think I've heard that before.
23:28
Daniel Moore: It truly truly is it just kind of just sets a tone really?
23:33
Michelle Moore: Yeah, it really does.
23:34
Daniel Moore: Whenever that takes place, and it just lets people know you're having some fun, you know we've got to have some fun in our life every once in a while.
23:42
Daniel Moore: So, as we talk about here getting this rest in our bodies, how will you embrace the rest that rejuvenates your spirit?
23:49
Daniel Moore: How will you embrace the rest that rejuvenates your spirit?
23:51
Daniel Moore: True self-care includes regularly doing the things that brings life back into your heart and your soul.
23:56
Daniel Moore: It's time to actively pursue the kind of rest that God designed for us.
24:02
Daniel Moore: And I think probably the thing that spoke the most to me as I was putting this section together was God set that example and we're supposed to be following his example.
24:13
Daniel Moore: That's another one of those places that we just don't really think about it and we kind of do our own thing and we don't really follow what God put there in front of us for that plan that he gave us to.
24:24
Daniel Moore: You know, work from that place of fullness and not a place of emptiness.
24:29
Daniel Moore: Yeah, and not a place of emptiness.
24:32
Daniel Moore: And so, in a nutshell, that's how you get rest and that's why it's important that you get that rest, yeah, and that will help you with that exhaustion that you have in your marriage as you try to work yourself back from this roommate perspective to being a soulmate.
24:48
Daniel Moore: So the next question that we.
24:50
Michelle Moore: I got to make a comment yeah.
24:51
Michelle Moore: I was.
24:52
Michelle Moore: When you said watch a comfort filled movie.
24:55
Michelle Moore: When you type that in, were you thinking Hallmark?
24:59
Michelle Moore: I knew it.
25:00
Michelle Moore: I knew it.
25:06
Daniel Moore: Well, it used to be Lifetime, but that became the man Hater Channel, and so we flipped the Hallmark after that, when you read that Christmas in July, I mean hello.
25:16
Michelle Moore: But when you read that I was like I know he was thinking Hallmark.
25:20
Daniel Moore: See, I love the joke that I've seen from time to time.
25:23
Daniel Moore: It said there's a newsflash.
25:25
Daniel Moore: Hallmark came up with a second storyline.
25:28
Daniel Moore: Oh my gosh, I'll have to laugh every time I read that you should see him.
25:33
Michelle Moore: He's over here, hitting his hand on the desk because he's dying laughing.
25:36
Daniel Moore: Hallmark has thousands was it thousands of movies probably?
25:38
Daniel Moore: And they've all got the same storylines.
25:40
Daniel Moore: It's genius.
25:42
Daniel Moore: There's a second storyline.
25:44
Michelle Moore: When he starts working Friday nights at the football game my mom and I get together and that's what we do on Friday nights is we watch Hallmark movies, hallmark chick flicks?
25:52
Michelle Moore: Yep, we get together to watch those, because you know what.
25:55
Michelle Moore: That's what us girls do.
25:57
Daniel Moore: Yeah, that's right.
25:59
Daniel Moore: Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt that I'll enjoy my football nights.
26:03
Michelle Moore: I just had to make that comment because I'm like I think he put that in there because of me like with Hallmark.
26:09
Daniel Moore: And keep this in mind.
26:11
Daniel Moore: God didn't say that a Hallmark movie was the way to get rest, so don't think that that's what we're saying.
26:16
Michelle Moore: No, no, actually it's not, by any means.
26:20
Daniel Moore: That's funny.
26:21
Michelle Moore: It's like why can't my marriage be like this?
26:23
Daniel Moore: No kidding, yeah, there's that Instagram thing, tiktok.
26:29
Michelle Moore: I couldn't help myself on that comment.
26:40
Michelle Moore: Uh, okay, moving on moving on.
26:41
Daniel Moore: So the second question here to wrap up this week's episode what brings you life?
26:45
Daniel Moore: Because we've already talked about in the first half of this episode that we know we got to have rest in order to fix this exhaustion problem and when we're so exhausted and under the weight of everything, we really don't feel like we have a life.
27:00
Daniel Moore: A lot of times, you know, we feel like that.
27:03
Daniel Moore: We're just constantly, you know, taking care of everybody else's problems and pouring into everybody else and never into ourselves.
27:11
Daniel Moore: And you know, like we said at one point, you can't really give what you don't have.
27:15
Michelle Moore: Right.
27:16
Daniel Moore: And you can't work from a place of emptiness.
27:18
Daniel Moore: Well, taking breaks and allowing your body to rest is essential to recharge your strength, but true godly self care goes even further.
27:26
Daniel Moore: It requires that you discover what stirs your soul and awakens purpose within you.
27:32
Daniel Moore: While rest restores your physical energy, it's actually only part of the picture.
27:37
Daniel Moore: The other vital piece is identifying what brings meaning, joy and passion to your life.
27:42
Daniel Moore: God doesn't call us just to survive, but to live out of abundance.
27:47
Daniel Moore: When we live filled, we can give more freely to those around us.
27:51
Daniel Moore: You are meant to overflow with grace, not run on empty.
27:55
Daniel Moore: So ask yourself are you producing fruit that blesses others?
28:00
Daniel Moore: Now the prophet Jeremiah.
28:02
Daniel Moore: He described a person connected to God like a tree rooted by fresh water.
28:06
Daniel Moore: Steady, flourishing and unwavering in tough seasons, despite the pressure of heat or the dryness of drought, that tree continually bears fruit because its roots are deep and nourished.
28:17
Daniel Moore: This is the kind of spiritual and emotional abundance that happens when your life is rooted in God's presence, through both rest and purpose.
28:25
Daniel Moore: When you're in touch with what breathes life into your soul, you stop relying on external circumstances to carry you through.
28:33
Daniel Moore: Instead, you thrive even in challenging times, because your source runs deeper To love others well and give generously.
28:41
Daniel Moore: You must consistently engage in experiences that refresh your spirit, things that bring creativity, beauty and hope alive in you, the kind of practices that feel like a breath of fresh wind from God, as if your dry bones are being restored to life, kind of similar to the example that's used a lot in Ezekiel's vision.
29:01
Daniel Moore: So think for a moment what ignites your spirit?
29:04
Daniel Moore: What dreams are hidden inside of you waiting to be pursued?
29:07
Daniel Moore: What pastimes leave you energized and full, rather than disengaged or distracted?
29:13
Daniel Moore: This isn't about chasing distractions or collecting more things.
29:17
Daniel Moore: The pursuit of wealth, recognition, status or an impressive lifestyle may offer fleeting satisfaction, but those things cannot sustain your soul.
29:27
Daniel Moore: Lasting joy isn't tied to circumstances.
29:30
Daniel Moore: It stems from the inside.
29:32
Daniel Moore: Temporary happiness fades, but internal joy grounded in God has staying power.
29:39
Daniel Moore: And when I think about that tree that we talked about in Jeremiah, there's another thing about that tree too that really stands out, and that's the fact that if you ever look at pictures of illustrations of that story, you'll notice that the tree, you'll see the roots and they go down into the water.
30:00
Daniel Moore: Yeah, and they're big, healthy roots and they go deep.
30:04
Daniel Moore: And so when the winds come, the winds blow the things of life tries to come up against it.
30:13
Daniel Moore: That tree stands firm, stands firm and it does not waver.
30:17
Daniel Moore: Nothing can blow it over because, again, its roots are rooted in that water, that nourishment that it needs to stay healthy, that nourishment that it needs to stay strong.
30:30
Daniel Moore: And, of course, the whole scope of the picture of that story is that water that's being spoke of.
30:36
Daniel Moore: There is God, that's the living water.
30:38
Daniel Moore: And us as people.
30:40
Daniel Moore: If we sprout our roots out into that water and the deeper, if we do this, rest like we're supposed to, and we sit there and just listen for God's voice, when we grow stronger in God, we give him those moments that we need for him to pour into us and to strengthen us through the Holy Spirit and through his word, then our roots go deeper and deeper into that water.
31:04
Daniel Moore: They go deeper into him.
31:06
Daniel Moore: And so then, when those things do come up against us and Satan tries to distract us, he tries to throw things in front of us to take our joy.
31:13
Daniel Moore: He tries to throw things in front of us to make us feel that we're so exhausted.
31:18
Daniel Moore: We just don't have a reason to live or reason to pour into anybody.
31:21
Daniel Moore: We're a lot tougher at that point and we're a lot stronger and God will always be there for us through all of those winds of change and the things that the world tries to throw at us.
31:35
Daniel Moore: And I know for myself, and I think you feel the same way anytime that we get to have time just to read the Bible or, with you, you like to listen to worship, music, things like that.
31:50
Daniel Moore: What does that do for you when you have those moments like that?
31:56
Michelle Moore: It just makes me feel closer to God.
31:58
Michelle Moore: It gives me just that time that I need to just really soak in His presence.
32:04
Daniel Moore: Yeah, makes you stronger in His Word and I feel a refreshing.
32:09
Daniel Moore: You know, whenever I have my chance to get some time to read, you know, whenever I have my chance to get in and get some time to read, it just changes the whole, especially if I can do it in the morning, which I'm usually is my best time is in the morning it just really kind of gives me a whole different outlook on my day Pretty much.
32:25
Daniel Moore: You know it.
32:25
Daniel Moore: Just, I go into my day in a different mindset, and so there's an important thing about keeping ourselves rooted where God wants us to be.
32:35
Daniel Moore: Yep, you know, God wants your heart overflowing with love, joy, kindness, gentleness, peace and all the qualities that reflect his character, that's the fruits of the spirit.
32:44
Daniel Moore: He wants these things rooted so deeply in you that they naturally spill over and touch the lives of others.
32:50
Daniel Moore: When you live from that place, rest and purpose seamlessly work together and the result is a life that bears fruit in every season.
33:00
Daniel Moore: You know, Michelle and I we've had a great relationship between each other, but we also get exhausted with life eventually.
33:06
Daniel Moore: We both like to take off on a vacation and spend time with each other.
33:11
Daniel Moore: That is just relaxation time, without any major agendas or places to be and schedules to keep when we can unwind.
33:18
Daniel Moore: In that way, it recharges our batteries and keeps us going until the next time that we need a break.
33:24
Daniel Moore: You know, back in June, what did we do?
33:27
Daniel Moore: We went on a cruise, we took a vacation and that was very relaxing.
33:32
Daniel Moore: It was very relaxing.
33:33
Daniel Moore: Now.
33:33
Daniel Moore: Unfortunately for you, you got sick the last couple of days.
33:36
Michelle Moore: Yes, I did.
33:36
Daniel Moore: Right when we were getting our C days in.
33:38
Daniel Moore: We could have just relaxed and enjoyed those days.
33:41
Michelle Moore: But I did, I slept, but you still enjoyed it, yeah.
33:45
Daniel Moore: But we went on a vacation a couple of years ago, went to the mountains.
33:48
Daniel Moore: You know you just have to get away sometimes and sometimes it's nice just to go to those quiet places.
33:56
Daniel Moore: We've come to love the mountains, we really do.
33:59
Daniel Moore: It's just so beautiful and serene and you are, you're out there with nature.
34:03
Daniel Moore: You don't hardly see anybody at all.
34:12
Daniel Moore: When you're out there, going on those back roads and seeing lakes and elk and all kinds of animals, we'd go out there and we'd find a mountaintop in the distance and we'd just start driving towards it and we would pack our lunch and we would just literally have lunch either at a picnic table or somewhere.
34:24
Michelle Moore: But we had a great time.
34:26
Michelle Moore: I mean it was just we weren't bombarded with people, our phones, I mean it was just nice.
34:33
Daniel Moore: Yeah, they wouldn't work yeah.
34:35
Michelle Moore: It was great.
34:36
Daniel Moore: We were hoping our GPS would keep working, we wouldn't get lost.
34:39
Michelle Moore: It's not necessarily so much me, as it is Dan Dan, you know that's I mean.
34:44
Michelle Moore: He does a lot with this phone.
34:46
Daniel Moore: And.
34:46
Michelle Moore: I mean nothing wrong with that, but you know, even when we were on the cruise he was working and it was like, seriously, but I'm like, hey, you do you, I'm gonna do me.
34:58
Michelle Moore: I'm here for rest, and you know, and he always paid attention to me.
35:00
Michelle Moore: So I'm not you know, not that.
35:01
Michelle Moore: But I mean there's just Dan does a lot when it comes to the podcast.
35:06
Michelle Moore: You know he does not only this one, but he does another one, and then he also is studying on something big right now, and you know he and you know he, just he likes to study a lot.
35:17
Michelle Moore: Me, on the other hand, I just like to put my worship music in and close my eyes and lay out in the sun.
35:24
Daniel Moore: Yeah.
35:25
Michelle Moore: Why he's in the shade with the fan.
35:27
Daniel Moore: That's right.
35:29
Michelle Moore: Studying.
35:30
Michelle Moore: Yeah, that's out on the ocean.
35:31
Daniel Moore: Yeah, definitely got to have a fan.
35:33
Daniel Moore: Yeah, I just look like a tomato if I don't.
35:37
Daniel Moore: But there's just something about getting out into nature, where it's quiet, you know, and just just enjoying what God's created and it is it's.
35:46
Daniel Moore: It's a regenerate, re-energizing moment to just get yourself and, again, that's how we get filled.
35:51
Daniel Moore: That's how we fill those empty places.
35:54
Daniel Moore: We have to let God in there and let him rework all of that and actually let him do it and make sure that he is taking care of that.
36:03
Daniel Moore: So, in marriage events, thousands of people have been asked to share their experiences and what those are that bring them to life.
36:10
Daniel Moore: Well, the following list that we're going to share here is intended to prime the pump and help you clarify what will ignite passion in your heart and help you stay abundantly full of joy.
36:22
Daniel Moore: Also, we'll look at the earlier list of activities that bring rest.
36:26
Daniel Moore: You know some of those are going to apply here as well, such as spending time with God, so we're not going to mention any of those here.
36:33
Daniel Moore: But, michelle, why don't you share with us?
36:35
Daniel Moore: There's a list there of items that, again, people have been asked to share.
36:42
Daniel Moore: What experiences bring them life into themselves?
36:45
Daniel Moore: What is it that it takes for them to refocus and to get that fulfillment in their life.
36:51
Daniel Moore: So give us some of that list there.
36:53
Michelle Moore: Spend time with family, serve others, invest time in their life.
36:55
Michelle Moore: So give us some of that list there Spend time with family, serve others, invest time in a hobby, have a coffee date with a close friend.
37:00
Michelle Moore: I don't know why anybody would want this one, but I'm going to say it Exercise or workout.
37:07
Daniel Moore: Not me.
37:08
Michelle Moore: I know Me neither Mentor, a troubled teen or underprivileged youth.
37:12
Michelle Moore: Go on a mission trip, travel or go on vacation.
37:15
Michelle Moore: Conquer a fear, take a risk and try a new activity, something out of the ordinary that pushes you out of your comfort zone.
37:23
Michelle Moore: Like what is that skydiving you can do something like that.
37:26
Daniel Moore: Yeah, something like that.
37:28
Michelle Moore: Take a class or learn something new.
37:29
Michelle Moore: Learn a foreign language.
37:31
Michelle Moore: Teach a class, Start your own business Regularly attend a Bible study class.
37:37
Michelle Moore: Go on an adventure to a museum, historical site, concert or play.
37:42
Michelle Moore: Try creative writing or blogging about a topic you care about.
37:48
Daniel Moore: So we've done some of those and I think you can probably see you know there's some there on that list that works for you.
37:55
Daniel Moore: What's some that stuck out to you there, that that works in your life?
38:00
Michelle Moore: I'm really big about serving others, so I love that.
38:03
Daniel Moore: You are.
38:05
Michelle Moore: And I love spending time with my family Probably too much sometimes.
38:08
Michelle Moore: I love having coffee dates, Definitely not exercising or working out.
38:15
Michelle Moore: But travel, go on a vacation.
38:18
Michelle Moore: Of course I like to go on an adventure.
38:23
Daniel Moore: Yeah, we do concerts occasionally.
38:24
Michelle Moore: Yeah.
38:25
Daniel Moore: We've actually got one coming up here pretty soon.
38:26
Daniel Moore: You know, that's just some ideas, it's just something a little out of the ordinary.
38:31
Daniel Moore: What?
38:31
Michelle Moore: about you.
38:31
Daniel Moore: To get you kicked off A lot of honestly and a lot of people probably know this me and you are similar, so there's a lot of things there that we do.
38:40
Michelle Moore: You're doing creative writing and blogging.
38:41
Daniel Moore: Yeah, some of them are a little different.
38:43
Michelle Moore: You have your own business.
38:45
Daniel Moore: Yep, you teach.
38:46
Daniel Moore: I don't do the foreign language thing, though I have hobbies.
38:51
Daniel Moore: I was a drummer for a while, so I really enjoyed doing that while I'd done it, and I like to serve other people in different ways.
39:00
Daniel Moore: So, yeah, there's a lot of things there that—.
39:04
Michelle Moore: Notice he didn't say spend time with family.
39:07
Daniel Moore: Well, I enjoy that too.
39:08
Daniel Moore: It's a joy to spend time with you.
39:11
Michelle Moore: Not family, it's just me Just kidding.
39:14
Daniel Moore: No, I enjoy spending time with you, not family, it's just me Just kidding.
39:16
Daniel Moore: No, I enjoy spending time with my family yeah.
39:17
Daniel Moore: There's a lot of them in that list that works for me and works for you?
39:22
Daniel Moore: Yeah, we're a lot alike, and I'm sure you guys can resonate with some of those things in that list as well.
39:26
Daniel Moore: But that's just some things that you can think about to maybe take some time out.
39:32
Daniel Moore: You know, take a time out in your life and go do something a little bit different and, you know, just get your mind cleared out and allow God to work inside of you.
39:43
Daniel Moore: As we close this week, what about you?
39:54
Daniel Moore: You know what habits or rhythms will you commit to that will renew your spirit and deepen your connection with God so that his presence fills every part of your life?
40:03
Daniel Moore: Now many of us are juggling full schedules packed with responsibilities, ambitions and even good intentions, but constant activity often leads to shallow interactions, emotional exhaustion and a tired heart that feels disconnected from purpose and joy.
40:20
Daniel Moore: When we operate from a place of depletion, both we and our relationships suffer because we simply have nothing left to give, and that's not the life that God has called us to.
40:34
Daniel Moore: His design is for us to love fully and live abundantly, not from scarcity but spiritual overflow.
40:41
Daniel Moore: Our world is desperate for people who are refreshed, centered and full awake in their faith, rested, vibrant hearts, shine with clarity, love and generosity.
40:52
Daniel Moore: It's from that place of wholeness that we can truly make an impact.
40:59
Daniel Moore: So, as we close this week, I hope that maybe some of the stuff that Michelle and I talked about over those last couple of weeks I know good and well.
41:07
Daniel Moore: This probably resonates with 99.99% of anybody listening to this episode right now, including us.
41:14
Daniel Moore: I mean, you know we're very busy.
41:16
Daniel Moore: Also, we're not going to sit here and say that we're not.
41:18
Daniel Moore: We are very busy and sometimes it's an effort that we have to make to even, you know, close our minds off and, you know, get some good quality God time.
41:28
Daniel Moore: I hate to say that, but you know life is so busy with stuff that's going on and that's how Satan wants it.
41:36
Daniel Moore: He wants us to be empty and have no substance inside of us, so that we can't even build ourselves up or even people around us.
41:42
Daniel Moore: That's the way that he wants to keep it, but that's not God's plan, and so we hope that maybe something that we've shared here will help you understand how to get that rest and how to replenish yourself so that you're not exhausted in your marriage, because that's what this was all about.
41:59
Daniel Moore: Is there anything else that you wanted to add to this?
42:01
Michelle Moore: Yeah, remember, it's time to actively pursue the kind of rest that God designed for us.
42:07
Daniel Moore: Yes, definitely.
42:08
Daniel Moore: So the takeaway from this episode roommates are exhausted and have nothing to give.
42:15
Daniel Moore: Soulmates give regularly out of an abundantly full heart, and Michelle and I can definitely resonate with that, because we've been where we were exhausted and had nothing to give to each other and we didn't like it.
42:30
Daniel Moore: I'm so glad that we're not in that condition anymore.
42:34
Daniel Moore: You know, I feel like both of us do speak into each other a lot.
42:39
Daniel Moore: We build each other up Absolutely and we do the best that we can to make sure that our marriages are fulfilled to the best they can be with the situations that we are in.
42:49
Daniel Moore: Yeah, and I'm just thankful to God that he's really worked that out within us, and that's our prayer for all of you is that you can come to that point as well.
42:57
Daniel Moore: Well, next week we'll be coming in with a brand new episode, and so we hope that you'll join us for that as we continue this episode or this series, I guess I should say on marriage reset and how to become a soulmate instead of being a roommate.
43:17
Daniel Moore: So as we go this week, we just pray that your marriage is stronger and that your walk with God is closer after this episode.
43:25
Daniel Moore: This is an extension of Connecting the Gap Ministries, and we pray that you have a blessed week.