Latest / Babes, how did you get here / Street Gangs, Cancer & Cambodia: The Story of a Man Who Refused to Quit

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Street Gangs, Cancer & Cambodia: The Story of a Man Who Refused to Quit · Babes, how did you get here

• 0:14
  Living in Japan and visiting Japan are a little bit different Okay Visiting Japan is super nice I think Especially the springtime there is a cherry blossom But living in Japan is a little bit stressful for me Okay What are the hours like? Working hours? The life Waking up in the morning and going to the company So it's work work work? Yeah Okay
• 0:42
  We're dropping new episodes every single week. So make sure you subscribe. You don't want to miss this, babes. And leave a comment and tell me, what do you want to hear out of my next conversation? Your support really helps this community grow. And if you know someone who's quietly been thinking, should they take that next big leap? Babes, send them the podcast.
• 1:01
  Shunsuke, affectionately known as Take, is a man who has lived many lives. From battling testicular cancer, navigating divorce, he was on his way to becoming a professional football player when that got derailed at the young age of 17. Born and raised in Japan, he now lives here in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. There is so much to talk about, but first I must ask, Babes, how did you get here?
• 1:26
  It's always when we drink, when we eat with our friends, where will we go next? Right. Those kinds of things come at the end and we are searching so many cities. Have you ever been to Malaga? I don't know. What is that? Mexico, near the Mexico City. Okay. But Panama?
• 1:48
  No, that is a Mexican city. But that is beachside and a very secure place in the Mexico. Oh, really? Not Malaga. Malaga is Spain, but Madora. No, no, no. I forgot. Somewhere beginning with M, we'll find it. Yeah. What do you want to get from the next place that Cambodia can't give you? Or is it just curiosity? Curiosity. Okay. Curiosity brings me to the next place, I think.
• 2:18
  And what would you miss the most?
• 2:22
  In Cambodia, the friends and the people. Are your friends quite transient? Is it a place where people are here for like a contract for a year and then they leave? Or do people stay? You know, expat's life is changing every two years or three years and so many friends going back home or going to the next place. And many new faces coming and many news is coming. That is repeating. I feel like I repeat that cycle three times.
• 2:50
  Old friends still here, very rare. Okay. And just yesterday, one of my best friends, Simon from UK, has gone to Timor-Leste. Okay. Yeah. So you're still here and everyone keeps moving? Yeah. How does that feel? This is expats life. Okay. Yeah, so I miss many friends, but at the same time, so many new friends... Come in. Come in. So that's the life. Yeah.
• 3:19
  And I will not stay here for a long time anymore. Maybe two years, three years more. And then you'll move too. I feel like there's... I don't know why Japanese culture, I find it quite interesting, even though I don't know enough about it. Someone sent me something the other day that said they have found their favorite word in Japanese. And it was a word that meant I eat because my mouth is lonely. It was kuchiyo.
• 3:49
  Kuchisabishi. Thank you. Kuchisabishi. And when I read it, I was like, oh my gosh, that's my word. It was like, I'm not hungry, but I eat because my mouth is lonely. There is a word. I was like, how do you have a word for that? That is incredible for a culture to have a word that sums up something perfectly. Are there any other gems, words in your culture that sum up so much?
• 4:15
  Yeah, there's super specific words in Japanese word. For example, there's a bunch of rains these days. Okay. And doshaburi is raining cats and dogs. Yep. Doshaburi. Doshaburi. But at the beginning, it's like a spring dream, right? It is like...
• 4:38
  Shigure. Okay. Yeah. So shigure is the sprinkling before the raining cats and dogs. Yeah. See, I don't have a word for the sprinkling before. Yeah. There are so many words related with nature and...
• 4:56
  the life philosophy. Mmm. Mmm. That feels super interesting to me. Super interesting. And there is a word, Japanese word turning into English dialect. Have you ever heard about ikigai? Ikigai, no. Ikigai is a life purpose. Okay. Mmm. And itonami is a human endeavor. Mmm. And those kinds of words,
• 5:22
  Ikigai especially is now many, many non-Japanese people using Ikigai as English. Okay. Yeah. What's your life purpose? My life purpose? I don't know, but meet with people as much as possible through my whole life and widen my perspective as much as possible.
• 5:46
  The rest of your family, are they all in Japan in the community that you lived in? Yeah. I was born in Kobe and moving to Yokohama because my father was working for a Norwegian shipping company. And started from Kobe and moving to Yokohama. Both of them are port city.
• 6:10
  My parents are Christians and my parents' parents are very much Christians. I'm going to the church every week. I grew up in those kind of family and I would rather choose to play football going to church. And at the same time, my father was bringing Norwegian family, Egyptian family, Italian family, Brazilian family to my
• 6:35
  family. I wanted to talk with them through my words, but Portuguese, Italian, English, Norwegian, Egyptian, so they have own words, but they could speak in English, even their kids. To communicate with them, I have to study English. That's the reason I wanted to study English. To be able to communicate with them. Do you think that your dad bringing these families
• 7:02
  was the seed that was planted for your curiosity about the world? Exactly. My father is doing it on purpose, I think. Oh, really? I think so. Is your brother as curious about the world as you are? My big brother is not interested in speaking in English. Okay. I was more interested and I was curious about talking with them, with my words, what would happen, kind of thing. Very cool. Do you speak Kamai?
• 7:34
  Only I use the Kumae when I'm riding on the tuk-tuk and buying something small. Because my colleagues Kumae, but they can speak English very well. So you communicate with them. I don't have to use them. Do you feel that Japan is home? Yeah.
• 7:56
  Japan is my home country and there is parents, my friends, my kids. Even after divorce, I want to go to meet them and I want to spend time together.
• 8:11
  But Cambodia, so many friends, international friends, and it's not so much tight like Japanese society. Okay. I don't have to worry about anything in Cambodia. Like what were you worrying about? Worrying is like family tension. Okay. And you have to do this. You have to report this. You have to talk about this, cousins, blah, blah, blah. Right. Right.
• 8:37
  I have to stop it please give me a give me a space sure here you can just be free be myself okay
• 8:47
  Those kinds of things, social things, family things is too much for me. Okay. But, you know, I had a cancer last year. The family support and friends support is massive. And I appreciate for both Japan and Cambodia and all over the world. How did you find out that you had cancer?
• 9:08
  I had a testicular cancer and my ball was getting swollen as hell. And what is this? It's too long. Yeah. Yeah, that's the thing. When I play football, it's touching. And when I ride on my moto, it is a little bit uncomfortable. Okay. And you had your treatment here? Yeah.
• 9:30
  Can you tell me, I know nothing about chemotherapy, except that when I was in high school, we had a guy in our class who had a very specific type of cancer that was very common in young people. I can't remember exactly what it was called. But he had beautiful curly hair. He was in high school about six foot one, so very tall, very attractive. Not that it's relevant, but he was...
• 9:59
  He completely transformed. So he got to the stage where he was having chemotherapy and his skin had like a tinge of green. Like you could look at him and you could see like a slight green color on his skin. He lost all of his hair, he became emaciated, like very, very thin. And that's the only point of reference that I have for chemo, but I don't really understand.
• 10:24
  Yeah, chemo is a very strong medicine. Okay. It's like toxic almost. Okay. Killing the cells of cancer cells inside the lymph nodes and in the body. Right. And at the same time, killing the very good thing in the body. Okay.
• 10:41
  After chemotherapy, we lose the hairs. I lost all the eyebrows, all the hairs from my body. Okay. I was completely skinhead. Right. But I don't care. And very tiring, exhausted all the time. And...
• 11:02
  That makes me feel a little bit depressed. During? It's tired. Okay. Just tired. Are you able to still work? I could. I could work at that time. Okay. That is because of my doctor, Dr. Tatiana from Russia. And she was a very good oncologist. And you're being treated here? Yeah. In Phnom Penh? In Phnom Penh. And you're still going to work? Yeah. But you're very tired? Yeah.
• 11:32
  I was tired one week going to the hospital from morning until night getting the drugs with injection. Before we continue, make sure that you join our community by clicking the link below. You will get to choose thumbnails before the episodes go live, pick our next destinations, even recommend guests. I really cannot wait for you to help me shape where this podcast goes.
• 11:59
  And after that, going back home and sleep every day for a week. Okay. And after that, too strong for the body. So two weeks, I have to take a break. Okay. So at that time...
• 12:14
  I have to drink two liters of water every day and eating healthy foods. And if you can, you can work from home. Okay. At that time, I was going to the office sometimes. Oh, wow. But I have to be careful about germs and I have to wear the mask. Right. And the cells are not so strong and there is no immune system. Why did you go to work? Sometimes.
• 12:43
  I want to socialize with other people. Most of the times I was working from home. Okay. Yeah. And then first round is one week of the injection, two weeks of the break time. That is in total three weeks is one cycle. Okay. And I had to go through four cycles. Okay. And after that, I get,
• 13:09
  Like, it's done. Like, Take, you don't have any sales anymore. Okay. That was last year, Christmas Eve.
• 13:16
  Wow. Yay, I finished. And then doctor and nurse was ringing the bell. Hey, congratulations. And we were super happy. And during the chemotherapy, so many Instagram messages, so many letters, so many books, people and friends are giving me a lot of encouragement. I received, without those kind of supports, emotional support, I was much more depressed and it was taking much longer, I think.
• 13:46
  When you first got the news, so when you first get your results back, what are you feeling? Oh my gosh, cancer? I've never imagined. But I have to face, how long does it take? And is it curable? Okay. I was so scared.
• 14:09
  But the doctor said, this will be cured. Surgery, after finding that one week later...
• 14:18
  surgery and take off one ball. Okay. And chemotherapy starts in two months. So you can go back to Japan now and talk to your family and what would happen. And I talked to Japanese family and my parents and coming back to Phnom Penh because I was working here and the insurance is working here. Okay. And there is no social security in Japan now for now because I'm not working for Japanese company.
• 14:45
  So I had to get the treatment here. How is healthcare here? I don't know anything. Is it good? It depends on the hospital and it depends on the doctors. But there is a National Social Security Fund. So if people have that card, they can get a cure. Okay. But not so much modern medical equipment compared with...
• 15:14
  US, UK or Japan, but there is some certain technical skill doctors, oncologists and specialists here. So it's fine. So you were comfortable that you were in good hands? Yeah. Okay. And so you get the confirmation that you don't have cancer anymore. Do you ever get scared that you'll have it again?
• 15:37
  Yes, I have to go to a periodical medical checkup every three months. And this month I have to go. And next is December. And next year, twice a year. So decreasing the time. And after that, once a year for three years. So in total, five years I have to go. And after five years, done. Then you don't go anymore.
• 15:59
  Okay. Are there any lifestyle changes that you have made since then? Yes. Oh, really? I was drinking a lot. Okay. I was smoking a lot. Okay. I completely stopped smoking. Oh. And I am drinking less.
• 16:15
  I am still drinking, but I'm less drinking and eat more healthy food. And I cook more by myself. Okay. You cook here. I feel like no one cooks here. Do people cook here? Everyone eats all the time. Yeah. But the materials, foods are very cheap and anything is here. And so much food. I want to eat fruits every day. I'm eating vegetables and meat. I have to avoid a poke.
• 16:44
  pork is very nice. I have to eat more beef and fish and vegetables, mushrooms. I am learning those kind of nutritious things and vitamins, those kind of things. And I prefer to choose a nicely healthy food.
• 17:09
  I feel like Japanese culture is super healthy in general. Yeah, in general. Yeah. But so much rice. Yeah, I don't eat rice. Oh, really? Yeah. If you came, like, said April come for dinner and you made rice, I would eat your rice.
• 17:28
  Right. Because I don't have an issue with it, but I don't cook rice ever for myself. I don't ever order rice. I don't. Yeah, I'm not a fan of rice. And Jamaica, we're a rice country, right? Like you eat rice with your meat. And so you go to people and you order food and you're like, oh, could I please have veg instead of rice? And it becomes a whole debate.
• 17:49
  why not eating rice? What is wrong with the rice? Because people don't understand how I could not eat rice. But being in this part of the world, in Southeast Asia, it's a huge thing. Like, I order food and everyone's like, oh, you don't want rice? I'm like, no, I'm fine, thank you. And then it comes with rice anyway.
• 18:09
  So, Japanese people are rice people. We are growing up with rice. Miso and tofu and those kinds of things. But I am eating less rice actually. Okay. Why do you eat less rice? I ate too much. Too much. Okay. And yeah, after chemotherapy, I have a weird...
• 18:32
  Exhaustion in the cough Okay Only right foot Okay And sometimes pain And it takes time to get cured perfectly And still there is a side effect, I think Really? Yeah But now I'm getting better Okay So with time, you hope that it won't hurt? Time, time, I think Did you tell your children when you were diagnosed with cancer? Yeah, yeah They had to get up, study to get up
• 19:01
  That must have been frightening. Yeah. But, yeah, I did not seriously tell about those kind of things. I don't want to scare them. Yeah. How old are they now? Now the daughter is 16. Okay. And son is 14. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I can imagine it's heavy. Yeah.
• 19:23
  It feels like everyone's getting cancer. I lost a friend to cancer in June. So many. And we reconnected. So she had had cancer. It had gone into remission. And then basically she was then starting chemo again. She had wanted to try more natural remedies the second time around. But unfortunately it had already spread so much. Oh really? That the doctor said there is no option for that. And
• 19:52
  And I remember when I was then told that she had passed, it was just, I still don't think I can get over it to be honest. I think it's just, it's a strange reality. And it feels like, obviously I appreciate that as doctors and science becomes better, we're going to get better at diagnosing. But at the same time, it does feel like, you know, once upon a time, it was only for old people. Now it feels like it doesn't matter about age. Like cancer does not discriminate in anything. Yeah.
• 20:22
  And, yeah, I feel like there's not a single person that hasn't been affected. You know, I had another cousin who had prostate cancer. Oh, wow. And thankfully, he's fine. But, again, everyone has a personal story and a connection.
• 20:40
  to cancer. Exactly. I just got, how to say, an Onco Hospital for Children just reached out to me this morning and they know I'm the survivor. And there is a special oncologist for eye cancer for the kids.
• 21:04
  There will be a Cancer Awareness Week in next month. So I will work with them, collaborate with them, and making an awareness campaign, communication campaign with local celebrities. And I have to reach out young or old, whoever, who has a possibility to get cancer. What do you want people to know?
• 21:30
  So, cancer, no discrimination among ages. Cancer will hit you, but...
• 21:40
  The most important thing is checkup. Checkup is not a bad thing. If you don't have, that's great. If you have it, if you can find Ari, that would be curable. You should go. Screening, go there. That's the thing I want to tell. If I was a little bit later, I would be not here maybe.
• 22:02
  And sometimes men don't like to check up things. You know, men will... Go there. Yeah. No shame. Go there. Don't be shy. Yeah. I have to talk with my words. Yeah. Yeah. So it's a good thing. I want to support a good thing. Has there ever been a time during your nine years here in Penang Pen where you thought that it wasn't the right thing to do to take that first job opportunity? Ah...
• 22:33
  Did I have any doubts? Because it feels like, not to say that you haven't had challenges. You obviously had personal. We've just spoken about the fact that you survived cancer. But I mean, it seems like your transition from living in Japan to Cambodia, it doesn't feel like there was anything challenging or that. Is that fair or am I not being fair? Yeah.
• 22:57
  I didn't feel it challenging, but no friends, no family, no relatives in this country who to talk with. Okay. Just business partners and just...
• 23:09
  No colleagues. It's the clients. I have to work inside the client's office. It's not a friend. So it was tough at the beginning. Okay. But little by little, through the football community, through the photography community, making my friends and my community local, international, I can rely on very good friends, little by little. It feels like you could make friends anywhere, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 23:39
  Do you think that it's easy in general for people to make friends in Cambodia?
• 23:45
  not specific to your personality, I just mean for anybody who's coming here and moving here, do you think that it is easy to find your community? I think it is easy here, especially the Phnom Penh small community and not so huge like Bangkok. Compared with Bangkok, it's far away. The distance between the people is much closer and easygoing, and local people are welcome, and the expats understand that
• 24:13
  people are coming from all over the world. So easy to talk. I think it's much more adjustable. Than other places? Yeah. What do you have planned for the future? What do you think that...
• 24:27
  For the future. Yeah. I know that's a big question. Yeah. Right now, I'm almost end of the contract with my company. So I had to find a job. Right. And I'm applying for many organizations. And luckily...
• 24:46
  One, two organizations are almost accepting me, but I'm not sure yet. Sure. As of now. Is it easy to find work here? No. No. No, no, no. International development sectors is broken. Okay. Which is specifically my sector, but...
• 25:09
  Cambodian young generations are getting talented, more competitive, so no need to accept international talents from everywhere and paying more than Cambodian people. Cambodian people are much cheaper and working more. Right. Yeah, so very difficult situation now for the non-Cambodian people right now to work here.
• 25:32
  I guess. And many international Japan sector's friends losing jobs and some people going back home. Okay. It's quite tough, but I don't want to give up. Have you ever thought that if you didn't get a position that you'd go back to Japan or would you choose to go to some of the other places that we've discussed? I will not go back to Japan. That is very clear. Really?
• 26:02
  It's easy. It's not interesting for me. Sure. And going back to the normal Japanese. And the pressures. Mm. I would rather choose to go other way and...
• 26:18
  If there is a trouble, if you lost in the life or the way, I would rather to choose the interesting way or tough way. Yes. So even though I can get any job right after this month, I have to...
• 26:40
  send the financial support to my kids in Japan. Right. So I have to keep on going. I have to keep on earning money. So how about building my own agency or creative co-op? Okay. So I am building that with my friends. And one is James coming from UK. I just met just...
• 27:01
  Eight months ago. Right. He's super nice guy, skater, and older than me, but looks super younger than me. How old are you? I am 42. Okay. And he's 49, but he looks 35. Do skaters always have young spirits? Maybe. I think so. I think so.
• 27:20
  Yeah, he's a super nice guy and he can take videos. Okay. I can take photos. Right. So the one more lady is Tinzi. She is Cambodian, Belgium. Okay. And she used to work with my current company. Right. And she quit a month ago.
• 27:38
  So that's a good timing. She's a designer. Design, video, and photo. And we can sync all together what is good, what is not good. Choosing a client, choosing a project as a team, and applying for some big team project at the beginning, and getting money.
• 27:58
  That is not our purpose. Our purpose is to use those kinds of money for the people in need or making some meaningful, but fun project. Okay. So get projects that make the money that you can then use that money to do what you're passionate about. Yes. Okay.
• 28:17
  So, and three, our three members is a core member, but I have tons of friends, designers, illustrators, musicians, footballers, DJ, BJ, entrepreneurs, change makers. So how about mobilizing those people project by project and our initiating project, for example, like,
• 28:43
  There's a bunch of plastic bottles slowing away everywhere. And...
• 28:49
  How to change the people's mindset or the people parking everywhere here. No pedestrian walks here. Yeah. No parks, no nature's here. How about planting trees in this space? I'm all for the sidewalk. I know. Like my kids and I, I try to walk whenever we travel just because I think that you get to absorb a lot more of your environment. And it has been a challenge. Yeah.
• 29:14
  It is like I've aborted the mission several times. Exactly. And I'm like, yeah, we have to just. And also just environmentally, I'm like, I would rather walk. Right. It ticks all the boxes. Exactly. But yeah, you can't.
• 29:28
  So there are so many, like a small, from super small or big social issues here. Online scams here. Is online scamming a big thing? So many things. So many people. Really? Yeah. Enslaved in the tower, in the apartment. What is the scam? So I know online scam from a Jamaican perspective. They will try and target all the people abroad, from my understanding, and then get them to have access to their money.
• 29:57
  What is the scam? That is the thing also. And the mafia and gangs are related here. And so many Chinese people coming here and bring them into the apartment and pushing them into the apartment. They're enslaved, actually. Really? And they had to walk. If they want to go out, they will be killed or lynched. And so many people dying here. Wow. Maybe...
• 30:25
  dangerous but i will not that but that is a super scary thing yeah online scamming so so for example through me there's a bunch of fake uh advertisement and whatsapp telegram group and channels how about making a fake online advertisement
• 30:45
  By myself. Right. And hooking up some non-literacy people. Sure. And bring them to here, for example. Right. And teach them the digital skills. Okay. You are enslaved if we are not here. Right.
• 31:04
  So that is a funny way, but teaching is a good thing. So those kind of creative twists and making awareness and solve social issues one by one. Will you pursue that irrespective of whether some of these job interviews come through or not? I think, yeah, job interviews.
• 31:29
  Some of the interviews are going well and I will get that job. So you will still work with your UK friend and the lady from Belgium, irrespective of what happens?
• 31:43
  That is called Itonami. Yep. That is a team, our team name. And in English that is a human endeavor, everyday life endeavor. That is English meaning. Sure. And they are also freelancers. Okay. So they get a lot of job by themselves. Right. So it's like Ocean's Eleven. So this is the purpose. This is the goal.
• 32:10
  Let's get that together. Sure. And at the same time, we can work in different ways. So even though I get a job, I can work for Itonami as well. Okay. Very cool. So that is like a creative co-op owned by members. So many members here. Three is a co-op member, but other 100 are members.
• 32:34
  members will support each other and sharing the profit and giving shared jobs. I want to make a job creating, how to say, hiring some friends. Under a good purpose, we work together kind of thing. Do all your friends share this sense of greater purpose?
• 32:59
  Um, not all, but, uh, my friends are good people and I will not be friend if they are not good. So they understand who, what I'm talking about. And, um, yeah, I made a deck and I have to get the name card now after this, uh, podcast and, uh, I will go to the bridge jam, uh, for the event and, uh.
• 33:26
  passing the name card and getting some opportunities as well. But yeah, many good friends and they sometimes give me a job, share the job, and I have to give it back sometimes.
• 33:40
  Is the energy in Phnom Penh like that? Are people very open and kind to making connections? Again, coming from a UK perspective, I find that people aren't as willing. If you speak about an idea, they're not necessarily as willing to bridge gaps from their own network. And I just wondered, what is the working culture like here? Not so much. I feel...
• 34:04
  Very competitive here. Okay. Photographers are not working together. Really? And exhibitions are different. Okay. And solo exhibitions, solo exhibitions. And that is for the creators, freelancers. This is my job, this is my role. Right. So it's not working. Is that because there aren't that many opportunities and people feel that they have to
• 34:26
  Hold on to them for dear life? Yeah. I think that's right. As a professional, that's your job. So your opportunity, you should get that. Right. But at the same time, if we work collectively with different perspectives for greater purpose or greater thing, that would be much better. Sure. That is my way of thinking. So I'm involving different photographers, different videographers, different creators. Yeah.
• 34:54
  try to involve as much as possible for a big purpose. Yeah, I think that's unique. Not so many people do that. But that's what I love. How do you think that living in Cambodia has changed you? That's an interesting question. I have to survive.
• 35:24
  with unfamiliar system and not so much family kind of close friends. Now I have so many close friends, but at the beginning it was very tough. And...
• 35:39
  Many expats friends, I've never met in Japan because I was hanging out with Japanese people all the time. Those kinds of different perspectives from different backgrounds, different cultures, giving me a wider perspective and widen my eyes open and accept more.
• 36:01
  It's like, how do you say, in Japan, I was like, I don't know at all about world situation. I don't know about world society as a global citizen. Okay. But I tried to because of my father. And I could speak English. I could talk and interact with non-Japanese people in Japan, but not so much opportunities there, literally. And here I have to use English every day, every night, every time.
• 36:30
  And if there is some good purpose or good project, people will support easily and get people involved easily as a community, no matter where they're from, no matter how old you are, if you're good.
• 36:58
  they accept. Okay. Like those kinds of things, um, not happening in Japan changed me. So if you get older in Japan, people are automatically looking for the younger person. I think, um, there's not so much interaction with the older generation. Different generation. Yeah. Okay. I think, and
• 37:26
  They are not so much moving, not so much changing. Right. 30 years, same thing. Really? Here, every week something happen, every day. You see change. Every week changing. Okay. It's much more energetic and much more fun for me. Oh, wow. Yeah. When you told your parents that you were moving to Cambodia, how did they feel?
• 37:48
  Yeah, go. Really? Go. That is my parents. Okay. But sometimes you should come back. That's parents. Yes. Oh, but that's cool. I guess from your dad's perspective, because you say that you felt that he was deliberately like bringing people into your space from abroad, he must have felt a little bit extra satisfaction. Yeah, I think so.
• 38:11
  He is not talking to me in a direct way. Sure. But I think he is feeling that. Very cool. I think. If somebody was moving to Cambodia, if I said to you, Take, I'm moving to Phnom Penh, tell me the condensed version of the advice that you would give me.
• 38:36
  At the beginning, you can go to the tourist site to know about what is going on Phnom Penh. But if you want to connect with the local people and the people who are living here long time, you should go here, you should go there and meet with this guy, with this boy, with this girl, and do this one, see this one, eat this one. That could...
• 39:07
  bring you some knowledge, more local knowledge. You can talk to anybody. And that using your foot, using your eyes, using your mouth and make your own friends and make friends locally, internationally, that would enrich your Cambodian life. So are there things specific about Cambodian culture that you need to live here to really appreciate?
• 39:36
  Yeah, some manners and the rules. Like what? Like going to the Angkor Wat or temples with a lot of skins. Yes. Should be avoided. It's a little bit rude. No, I think you're being nice. It's very rude. Wear some clothes when you are going to the temples. There is no need for all of it to be out. Okay? Yeah, yeah.
• 40:04
  But not so much compared with Middle East. It's prohibited, right? Sure. In Bangkok also, super strict. Okay. But here, very loose. Okay. Not so much strict. So because people aren't as strict, then people think that it might be okay. Yeah. But they should still be respectful. Respectful. Yeah. In any culture, in any countries. Be respectful and they will respect you.
• 40:30
  Very cool. Is there anything that we haven't spoken about that you would like to speak about? I want to talk with you because you are entrepreneur and you are going around with your kids and you are doing a lot of things at the very beginning of this journey.
• 40:47
  I am also flying from now through Itonami. It is tough. I have to do everything. And getting a contract and talking to the team and making this one and talk to the next one and finding opportunities. So many things to do. But I love that. So I can do that. How about you? How was you at that time? Well, when I...
• 41:13
  I don't know. Where do you start with entrepreneur? I always knew that I was going to be in business. Always. My dad is one of 15 children and he has always had his own business. And so I wanted to be just like my dad. When I first moved back to the UK,
• 41:29
  it was to be on a television show, and I knew that I was gonna open my first restaurant before I was off the show, cause that was my marketing, that was my PR, right? I'd never worked in a restaurant before, I'd never worked in hospitality.
• 41:44
  I just had a very clear vision of what I wanted in terms of to represent Jamaica abroad. I would go to people's restaurants with a ruler and measure the chair because I had no idea how the measurements. I didn't know what things were supposed to be. Yeah.
• 42:01
  And so I did all of that from scratch and I would not advise it. Like, don't do it. First of all, don't open a restaurant is my advice. And second, if you do not take that first piece of advice, then I would say that it's important to work in the industry. So when you say that you are opening your own agency, that makes complete sense to me because you have been in that industry for years before. Yeah.
• 42:26
  Not like me deciding to just, yeah, I'm just going to go open a restaurant and you've never done it. That's super tough. It's mad. But I do think that we live in an age where entrepreneurship is glorified in a way that can be dangerous. I don't think that people talk enough about the challenges of having your own business. I don't think that people talk about...
• 42:50
  the fact that you're not all gonna like be rich and just sit down. Obviously that's not the purpose for your business, but a lot of people get into business because they think that it's an easier way than working a job. I also think back in the day, if a man worked at Ford, like the car company, and he had his wife and two kids at home,
• 43:13
  and he worked at Ford for 45 years and then retired, we would celebrate him. We would say that's a nice man. He kept his family. He did the thing. Now, in like 2025, you would say that he wasted his life
• 43:29
  He wasted his life working for someone else to build someone else's dreams. Why didn't he? And I don't believe in that. I don't like that people look down on jobs. Not everybody should have a business. And I don't say that...
• 43:44
  in a derogative way. I just think that it is okay and we should encourage people to really do what feeds them. And if you are being able to, you know, literally feed yourself and your family and pursue your passions within the structure of a business, then that's an amazing thing. I wish I could have a job.
• 44:06
  I wish I had the discipline, right? Because I think it takes a lot of discipline to work in a corporate structure. I think it takes a lot of discipline to even when you disagree, you have to still make it work for the team. Yeah. You know, and unfortunately, babes,
• 44:22
  My dad raised me in such a way that I don't think I could do that. But I would be very good. If I could just have the discipline, I would be very good at my job. I would earn more money. And that's another thing. People have this idea that a nine to five, you're going to earn less than a business person. I can tell you for free, my restaurants never made loads and loads of money. And I would make more money in a corporate job than I would have ever done.
• 44:51
  in like the business space. But what I can also say to not just be negative about business is that I do take pride in being able to think about something and bring it to reality, you know, without having to ask anyone's permission. I don't know if that even helps what you ask. Yeah, that's super cool. Not so many people are thinking like that.
• 45:15
  Yeah, I think it is a privilege also, you know, to know that if tomorrow nothing worked out, I could put my tail between my legs and go and ask my dad for some help. You know, and I think that's also not spoken about enough. I see. You know, I don't know if I didn't have that plan B.
• 45:37
  if I would be able to be as, you know, unafraid of risk. And I think it's important to also be honest about the circumstances. I'm now traveling with my kids trying to create something else, another idea. But if I had no security, no one to catch me when I fell, I'm not sure I'd be able to be as brave as people say. Yeah. Yeah, that's true.
• 46:06
  I am literally struggling now. Why? Because I have to keep on sending money to Japan. I cannot take a rest. And I spend all the money to divorce. And I gave all of the money literally. I have zero and came back to Phnom Penh when divorce.
• 46:30
  start working at the 17 triggers, making small money, and that is almost closing. Right. And at the end of the edge, actually. And if I cannot get a job from the interviews, I cannot make money, but I cannot let the kids starving. So I have to do something. That kind of situation pushed me. Yeah.
• 46:57
  to make it on me faster than I thought. Okay. Yeah, that's the thing. That pushing and that real situation, I have to earn money, otherwise my kids will be starving. That pushed me. Yeah. And yeah, and my ex-wife is earning money, but very small, so I have to support. Yeah. How do you carry that weight?
• 47:28
  Because of my kids. I love them. Even we are living in separate three, but we are family. And I'm their father. That is a responsibility. And not only the money, I have to give some perspectives. Sure. And the way I support
• 47:54
  through what I want to do, not through the corporate job only. There is a way to live. There is a certain way you will be welcomed. Those kind of life, way of living, they will learn something from me. I am hoping that kind of things.
• 48:18
  There is a perception that everybody who lives in whether it's Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, people are moving to that everyone's kind of just living large. Right. Like everyone moves from wherever they go, they move out. And the more and more I have conversations with people, or maybe I just attract more interesting people, I realize that
• 48:43
  it's not necessarily the image that we're seeing that is being portrayed like online. You know, a lot more people, I think there's this perception also that every day is a vacation. Like every day is a holiday in this part of the world. And the more you speak with people, you realize that that isn't the case. There may be some people who are living that life, but for many people that isn't, that isn't the case. Yeah.
• 49:13
  Do you think that people need to be a bit more honest about the challenges that they're having personally? I personally am learning from my friends and the people around me.
• 49:32
  Most of the people, most of the friends around me is working for international development sectors. Doing something good for the society, doing something for the people. Their idea is very high. And working so hard. But after that,
• 50:03
  They, some of my friends lost jobs and going back home and doing some boring things. Okay. To survive. To survive. But after some certain period, they sometimes come back. Okay. And getting more better job. Okay. But not all the time good.
• 50:29
  Sometimes down, I don't have a job, I don't have money, please give us money sometime. Some friends are like that, but it's fine. Not all the time. I'm not all the time good also, getting damaged from the football and divorced, I was a little bit,
• 50:54
  Not a little bit. That kind of struggle makes me cancer, I think. Really? Stress. It's not all the time good, but...
• 51:05
  Well, you stressed because I don't know how is divorce perceived in Japan? Is it very negative? Yeah. For my family, it's negative. Really? Very much. And that added another layer of pressure on. Yeah. And for my parents, friends, knowing it's a shame culture. OK, super strong. That's why I am being away from that.
• 51:34
  But it's fine. I can go back to Japan and I can talk about that openly. Is that culture changing? As in with the newer generations? Do you think it's changing? I think so. Yeah, slowly. My friends are coming from the US. It's completely different perspective. So different. I start laughing because I don't know where I have this stereotype. But every time I think about Americans when it comes to...
• 51:59
  the culture of talking, it's like over-talking. You know, it's like everyone is telling you they're a therapist. Everybody is going to their... And I don't even know if it's true now that I think about it, but it makes me laugh because I think that you have other cultures which are the complete opposite, right? You know, you keep certain things behind closed doors. You don't want people to know about things. And then you just have a miracle. Bam.
• 52:23
  Yeah, it's very opposite. Do you think that you are more open than the average Japanese person? I am super open, I think. But some certain things I cannot talk, right? It's not completely transparent. But my American friends and European friends are very much honest. Honesty is very, very nice thing to have in the life. Okay.
• 52:51
  Honesty and shame. They're not really... Japanese people, honest, being honest. Many Japanese people being honest. Some people valuing... Shame. Oh, that's a shame. The perception. Oh, you have to care about what you're talking. Like, really? I'm changing. So those kind of values. Yeah.
• 53:16
  How do you think that your Japanese family perceived your move to Cambodia? Was it seen? Because again, I think I'm just influenced by the images of Tokyo, right? And you're in a really good position in advertising. You're now being moved. Is that, for example, in Jamaica, if you have a job that moves you abroad, that is considered a like status.
• 53:42
  Right? Like you're doing well. Whereas if I tell some people that I can't wait to move back to Jamaica, that is looked as, oh, are you moving backwards? So I'm just wondering, in your context, was moving to Cambodia and staying in Cambodia for as long as you have, was that seen as an advanced position or was that seen as regression? It depends on what we do, but my...
• 54:11
  For me, like, job changes, evolving my characters, and wider perspectives, for me, it is totally fine. And I don't care who's saying, hey, Tage, how long have you been in Kanboy? I don't care. I am enjoying. So that kind of perspective. When I came here for the first time, I didn't have. Okay.
• 54:34
  I have now. So being here has allowed you to get rid of caring what people think. Yeah. Amazing. Yeah. Yeah. I think we all need to get there. I think we all need to get to a space where you just, you don't really care. Hmm.
• 54:51
  You care those kind of things? No, I've never cared though. Like ever. My friends, my friends who have known me from school, they say, you have always been the same. You just didn't care. I think my issue with the caring is within. Like my internal dialogue is within
• 55:10
  it's probably too harsh. And I was thinking about this recently, that if my children, for example, came to me and were speaking to them the way I speak to myself, I would be concerned. Like I would be kinder. And I was thinking that sometimes as a parent, we should use the same voice that we would use to our kids, to ourselves. Because I just think that,
• 55:37
  in my own head, I'm never achieving enough and I'm not doing enough. And it's like not enough in a way that I think. Really? Yeah. A hundred percent. I think, I think ambition is a double-edged sword, right? On the one hand, if you are ambitious and you have goals and you have dreams and you're willing to do what you can to pursue them, that's great, right? People call it driven. Yeah. But when, when,
• 56:05
  you never feel that you've achieved anything. So you could have had like, for example, I go to England to be on The Apprentice, right? My friend from high school tells me that I always said I wanted to be on this show. So you'd think that, oh gosh, you get on the show, you'd be really happy.
• 56:22
  But in real life, it's like, oh, you got on the show for a second, you're happy. And then immediately it's OK. What what now? What are you going to do now? And I think that I haven't quite managed. How do you balance still wanting to do and to push yourself, but not at the expense of constantly feeling like you've never done anything? What are you looking for now? What?
• 56:51
  I am looking for legacy in the sense that I am who I am because of my dad, right? And everything he was able to provide for me and the opportunities. And I know that as I sit before you today, I'm not in a position to do the same for my kids. And that worries me, right? Like I want my children to also be able to have all of the possible opportunities.
• 57:17
  And so that's like one thing. And unfortunately, that comes from money. I tell people all the time, like, I don't care about brands in the same way that you don't care about brands. But for me, money provides access. Yes. Right. And it provides security. It provides an ease of life that I want my children to be able to have.
• 57:41
  So nothing to do with the materialistic things and everything to do with just making things happen. I opened my first restaurant because my dad gave me the initial money to open it. So it's one thing for you to want to support your children in terms of with like lovely words and emotional support.
• 58:02
  And then it takes it a step further when you can actually say, I can help you fund this dream so that you don't have to go and sell your soul to an investor and basically do what the investor wants you to do. Right. And I so I want to be able to do that. I also, you know, want to be able to say that if I drop down dead tomorrow tomorrow.
• 58:26
  that everyone who came across my path is better for it. That's something that I want. And I only realized that because I was threading my eyebrows and the lady who owns the salon, I'd only spoken to her maybe like twice. And in my mind, our conversations weren't even that deep. I just told her she needed to get a better accountant
• 58:48
  And like she was complaining about not having enough hours in the day. And I was like, babes, with all due respect, your shop is open from this time until this time. I'm working at a restaurant where I'm literally doing 20 hour days. Do not tell me you don't have the time. Like that was the only conversations we had had. And I came in and she said, oh, I love seeing you because whenever I see you, you make me feel like I can always do more. Like I can always push myself.
• 59:12
  And this lady, she was Muslim, which is relevant because on paper you might say she's Muslim. I'm not. Why are we like connecting in this way? And I loved the fact that despite our differences, she felt that being around me made her a better person. And it made me realize that that's what I want from the world. I would like that, you know, when it's my time to go, whoever,
• 59:39
  had that connection there. I was better. That's super cool. Yeah. So I have a lot of work. And you are now being, becoming. It's too slow. It's, it's way too slow. It takes time. Life is like that.
• 59:56
  Life takes so much more time than I thought it did. No, really. Like, you know, when you're in school and you're saying like what your dreams are going to be. You know, you're going to be a millionaire by this age. You're going to do that by that age. I'm like, damn, it takes so much longer. I'm 42 and I'm still at the edge of the barge. On the barge. What should I do? For my life option is very limited and giving it to the kids. How can I say that?
• 1:00:26
  Yeah, maybe next month I will walk, start walking. I don't know, but I have to keep on pushing. It takes time. I don't know. I'm enjoying that. That's good. Yeah. Cool. Well, thank you very much. Thank you so much. I have one more question. Yeah. If your life was a postcard, what would the picture look like?
• 1:00:51
  Like, oh my gosh, we have so much friends and everybody smiling and crazy lady, boys and girls, everybody together. At somewhere on the beach, somewhere we go together. Amazing. No football?
• 1:01:13
  Some football players are here. Every kind of friend is here. So all the people. It's all about people. People. Yeah. That's the postcard. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you so much.