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The DUH-chess Wants Answers · DUH It Down

• 0:17
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome back to Dun It Down, where this week the Duchess takes over and asks the guys the hard-hitting questions submitted by the fans.
• 0:25
  SPEAKER_00: Because apparently, people actually want to know more about these idiots.
• 0:30
  SPEAKER_00: Could Lummocks survive on a deserted island if the only food was vegetables?
• 0:35
  SPEAKER_00: And did Vale really have a secret career as a gourmet waffle chef before becoming the man we know today?
• 0:41
  SPEAKER_00: These are the questions Dunn Nation demanded answers to.
• 0:45
  SPEAKER_00: Although, after hearing what the guys have to say, the bigger question might be: do we really care what these guys think?
• 0:52
  SPEAKER_00: Welcome to Dut It Down.
• 0:54
  SPEAKER_07: Here we are, back at it again, Dunn Nation.
• 0:57
  SPEAKER_07: We've got the Dud Down podcast, as always.
• 1:00
  SPEAKER_07: Myself, the Lummocks.
• 1:01
  SPEAKER_07: You know the other crew members.
• 1:03
  SPEAKER_07: We've got the Todd, we've got the Vale.
• 1:05
  SPEAKER_07: Tonight, we have the Duchess returning.
• 1:08
  SPEAKER_07: She is going to be taking us down questions from the fans.
• 1:13
  SPEAKER_07: So we're interested to see what they want to know from the Dud Down crew.
• 1:17
  SPEAKER_07: I'm sure if it's anything like the last ones, there are gonna be some pretty creative questions.
• 1:21
  SPEAKER_07: In honor of tonight, the Duchess, I believe you will be doing the podcast beverage.
• 1:26
  SPEAKER_07: Is that correct?
• 1:28
  SPEAKER_01: That is correct.
• 1:29
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for inviting me back.
• 1:30
  SPEAKER_01: Apparently, you guys survived another quarter without any adult supervision.
• 1:36
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm really back to see exactly what went wrong here.
• 1:40
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I've been listening, I've been taking a lot of notes, and the audience has some pressing questions.
• 1:46
  SPEAKER_01: And no, they're not asking about ironing.
• 1:49
  SPEAKER_01: Before we begin, uh the quarterly uh recap and QA, we need a drink.
• 1:56
  SPEAKER_01: So thanks for letting me be the uh drink decider this evening.
• 2:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um I drink tonight, it's like a little vacation to Italy.
• 2:03
  SPEAKER_01: I chose sparkling lemoncello, kind of an end of summer reminder that it's still uh ridiculously hot out, and thought this would be a good choice.
• 2:12
  SPEAKER_01: Um, for those who don't know, lemoncello is an Italian lemon liqueur.
• 2:17
  SPEAKER_01: It's traditionally served really cold, it's after dinner, and it's this one is a little different because it's got some bubbles to it.
• 2:25
  SPEAKER_01: Um is apparently straight lemoncello wasn't gonna be enough of a threat for me tonight.
• 2:32
  SPEAKER_01: I thought it'd go with the bubbly stuff.
• 2:34
  SPEAKER_01: So uh before I start here, I'm gonna take a sip.
• 2:36
  SPEAKER_01: Well, actually, before I start here, Todd why don't you take a sip?
• 2:40
  SPEAKER_01: Let the folks know what you think.
• 2:44
  SPEAKER_04: Ooh, lemonade.
• 2:45
  SPEAKER_01: Hey, hey, get don't drink all of it.
• 2:49
  SPEAKER_01: This is this is supposed to be for me.
• 2:51
  SPEAKER_01: Um yes, I'm gonna take a sip as well.
• 2:54
  SPEAKER_04: Just chugged half of it.
• 2:56
  SPEAKER_01: I did, I did.
• 2:58
  SPEAKER_01: Uh it's a little, it's a little spicy for the Duchess.
• 3:02
  SPEAKER_01: Basically, yeah, a little spicy.
• 3:05
  SPEAKER_01: Kind of tastes like sunshines, lemons, and and a headache.
• 3:08
  SPEAKER_01: Yep, I think this is maybe going to be the perfect beverage for me for uh for our down tonight.
• 3:16
  SPEAKER_07: Nice.
• 3:17
  SPEAKER_07: Sounds good.
• 3:18
  SPEAKER_07: Let's see what the fans want to know.
• 3:21
  SPEAKER_01: All right, well, since I'm gonna go to the city.
• 3:24
  SPEAKER_03: He's ready, he's ready.
• 3:26
  SPEAKER_01: Got things to do, people to see, places to go.
• 3:29
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so the last time I visited you guys, you've covered terrible movie endings, candy bars, competitive eating, useless super powers, uh, the 90s, mayonnaise, uh, various different uh sports, meat, trivia, and uh drug addled wildlife.
• 3:50
  SPEAKER_01: And one area where I may or may not get into uh because I've heard enough already, uh is fantasy football.
• 3:57
  SPEAKER_01: The fantasy football draft with some rules that required way too much executive function.
• 4:02
  SPEAKER_01: Um, so the audience has questions.
• 4:04
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna start with favorite candy bars.
• 4:07
  SPEAKER_01: Um, got a number of questions about this.
• 4:09
  SPEAKER_01: First, uh for Duh, during the candy bar episode, you admitted that you can't always tell the difference between the left twicks and the right twicks.
• 4:19
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I've had a long time to think about this.
• 4:22
  SPEAKER_01: What exactly did you think left twicks and right twicks meant?
• 4:27
  SPEAKER_04: Well, I was just going off the commercial, and it was confusing to me because in the commercial they look exactly the same.
• 4:34
  SPEAKER_04: And as I did my research afterwards watching the commercial, they taste exactly the same.
• 4:39
  SPEAKER_04: I don't I didn't get it.
• 4:41
  SPEAKER_07: But obviously you can't taste the difference.
• 4:43
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, there's a difference.
• 4:46
  SPEAKER_05: Yeah, I don't know.
• 4:47
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna have to go with the guys on this one.
• 4:50
  SPEAKER_01: There's definitely a difference for for one, one goes in your right hand and one goes in your left hand.
• 4:57
  SPEAKER_07: Right and one tastes like left and one tastes like right.
• 5:00
  SPEAKER_07: Come on, Thomas.
• 5:01
  SPEAKER_07: Yes, yeah.
• 5:03
  SPEAKER_04: Maybe maybe that's where the confusion is.
• 5:05
  SPEAKER_04: I don't know what left or right tastes like.
• 5:09
  SPEAKER_04: The right's a little more caramelly.
• 5:11
  SPEAKER_07: No, Vale, when he's driving down the highway and he finds those boots on the shoulder, he can't tell if they're a right boot or a left boot.
• 5:19
  SPEAKER_04: No.
• 5:20
  SPEAKER_03: Well, that's why he has to stop.
• 5:22
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that's why you gotta stop.
• 5:23
  SPEAKER_03: Try it on.
• 5:26
  SPEAKER_03: Not take it, but just leave it there once you once you see the boot.
• 5:30
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, and he puts it on the list.
• 5:31
  SPEAKER_07: Today I found three right boots and I left them there.
• 5:35
  SPEAKER_03: I saw I saw a sandal yesterday driving down the road.
• 5:41
  SPEAKER_03: I should have stopped and taken a picture.
• 5:43
  SPEAKER_03: We could have posted it.
• 5:44
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, nice.
• 5:47
  SPEAKER_01: My question, just to to veer off to the side a little bit, is that just a phenomenon here that there are constantly single shoes on the sides of the road, or is that a nationwide or maybe a global-wide phenomenon?
• 6:00
  SPEAKER_07: Because I'm gonna be 100% all the time.
• 6:03
  SPEAKER_07: Honest with you, I haven't paid attention to the shoulders of the highways looking for shoes.
• 6:09
  SPEAKER_07: But now that you ask the question, I will start paying attention to the shoulders and see if I'm picking up on a high volume of leftover shoes.
• 6:18
  SPEAKER_07: So in my in my travels, I see them all the time.
• 6:21
  SPEAKER_01: Oh I appreciate knowing this because I thought maybe it was just a here thing.
• 6:26
  SPEAKER_01: And uh, I saw Birkenstock the other day.
• 6:29
  SPEAKER_01: That's an expensive shoe to lose.
• 6:30
  SPEAKER_01: Just one.
• 6:31
  SPEAKER_01: It looked like it had made it across the road and it was just almost to wherever it was on its way to.
• 6:37
  SPEAKER_01: Uh no, I knew it wouldn't fit, so there was no point in me stopping.
• 6:42
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_03: All right.
• 6:43
  SPEAKER_03: Well, was it on right or left?
• 6:46
  SPEAKER_03: Usually it's the left one that's out there.
• 6:49
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I'm gonna have to pay closer attention.
• 6:51
  SPEAKER_01: I believe it was a right, but I will I will put it on my to-do list to pay closer attention to which shoe is the one that is escaping from wherever it needed to escape from.
• 7:02
  SPEAKER_01: We also find a lot of five-gallon pails here.
• 7:05
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, and and unfortunately, someone does not let me stop and pick up all of the pails we find.
• 7:10
  SPEAKER_03: Um stopping and look at a shoe, but you can't stop and pick up a pail.
• 7:15
  SPEAKER_01: Right because that would be crazy.
• 7:17
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_03: Crazy.
• 7:18
  SPEAKER_03: I was crazy once.
• 7:20
  SPEAKER_01: Don't you start that?
• 7:21
  SPEAKER_01: No, no, no.
• 7:23
  SPEAKER_01: So let's move on.
• 7:26
  SPEAKER_01: Let's move on to the next question before we we go there, uh sir.
• 7:32
  SPEAKER_01: For all of you, this is another question that came in.
• 7:38
  SPEAKER_01: Over as part of the conversation around what actually qualifies as a candy bar.
• 7:44
  SPEAKER_01: So I would love to know from you, and and the I think the donation would love to know from you all.
• 7:49
  SPEAKER_01: What is the defining characteristic that makes something a candy bar?
• 7:55
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I call it a candy bar, so in my book, it's a candy bar.
• 7:58
  SPEAKER_03: It's a candy circle.
• 8:01
  SPEAKER_04: Candy circle.
• 8:02
  SPEAKER_04: I think because they sell it with the candy bars, so therefore, then it becomes a candy bar.
• 8:08
  SPEAKER_01: So a question, they often will sell granola bars with candy bars.
• 8:13
  SPEAKER_01: Does that make granola bars a candy bar?
• 8:15
  SPEAKER_03: No granola bar in the candy bar section.
• 8:18
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, get it out of here.
• 8:20
  SPEAKER_01: It happens.
• 8:22
  SPEAKER_03: No, no.
• 8:23
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, so it's the shape, is what I'm hearing.
• 8:26
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Lumex that uh defines whether or not it's a candy bar.
• 8:30
  SPEAKER_01: So if it was a triangle, it would be a candy triangle.
• 8:33
  SPEAKER_07: Exactly.
• 8:34
  SPEAKER_07: A candy decahedron or uh I mean if you if you're gonna get into the higher levels of geometry, we have all kinds of different candy shapes, but yes, candy bar has to be in that uh a three-dimensional rectangular sort of shape.
• 8:48
  SPEAKER_07: That's a candy bar.
• 8:50
  SPEAKER_01: Got it, got it.
• 8:51
  SPEAKER_01: So, donation, here's a million-dollar idea for you.
• 8:54
  SPEAKER_01: Come up with the candy dough decahedron.
• 8:57
  SPEAKER_01: I think that could be highly popular, won't matter what it tastes like, it's all about the shape.
• 9:02
  SPEAKER_03: But they don't know what that means.
• 9:04
  SPEAKER_07: And if you advertise it as one is a left and one is a right, you could double your sales to the time because you'd have to get one of each.
• 9:12
  SPEAKER_05: Yep.
• 9:13
  SPEAKER_01: I love this plan.
• 9:14
  SPEAKER_01: I love this plan.
• 9:15
  SPEAKER_01: So, last question that came in on this.
• 9:17
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, if if someone were to eat a snicker bar with a fork, is that still a candy bar or does it officially go into dessert territory because you're using a plate and a fork and a knife?
• 9:32
  SPEAKER_04: What are we on Seinfeld?
• 9:35
  SPEAKER_01: The people want to know.
• 9:37
  SPEAKER_01: The people want to know.
• 9:38
  SPEAKER_07: It's still a candy bar.
• 9:39
  SPEAKER_07: I mean, you can go to Hershey Park and buy a 42-pound candy bar that takes a chainsaw to cut it.
• 9:45
  SPEAKER_07: Just because it takes a tool to cut that thing in half and put it in bite-sized pieces doesn't mean it's not a candy bar, it's just a freaking large candy bar.
• 9:52
  SPEAKER_07: So if you I mean, if you're in a if you're in a position where you need instruments and tools to break apart your candy bar so you can eat it, it's still a candy bar.
• 10:00
  SPEAKER_07: You just got issues.
• 10:03
  SPEAKER_01: Good to know.
• 10:04
  SPEAKER_03: By the way, I had uh uh Reese's pumpkin right before this.
• 10:08
  SPEAKER_03: You had the pumpkin?
• 10:09
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and they're fantastic.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 10:11
  SPEAKER_03: I have to say, you know what?
• 10:13
  SPEAKER_03: Now now I have to wait for the Christmas tree to come out to see if that were over top.
• 10:17
  SPEAKER_03: I I think I like the pumpkin better than the regular one.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_04: Me too.
• 10:20
  SPEAKER_03: And I figured out why.
• 10:22
  SPEAKER_03: Because I looked at it as I was eating it.
• 10:24
  SPEAKER_03: It seems to me that there's more peanut butter and a little less chocolate than a regular one.
• 10:32
  SPEAKER_01: The recipe is actually different.
• 10:34
  SPEAKER_01: I have looked this up, so it is a slightly different candy item.
• 10:40
  SPEAKER_01: Because I'm not going to say candy pumpkin because there are no really, I mean, are there other candy pumpkins?
• 10:44
  SPEAKER_01: I suppose there are.
• 10:45
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, in fact, there are a lot of candy pumpkins, but none with chocolate and peanut butter.
• 10:50
  SPEAKER_03: And there's no Cadbury egg uh Halloween ones.
• 10:53
  SPEAKER_03: I went to I looked everywhere.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_03: Good.
• 10:55
  SPEAKER_03: I was about to ask you that.
• 10:57
  SPEAKER_01: That's a shame.
• 10:58
  SPEAKER_03: Well, I haven't been to Walmart yet.
• 10:59
  SPEAKER_03: We'll see what happens when I go there.
• 11:02
  SPEAKER_04: I still have to get my uh Reggie bars.
• 11:05
  SPEAKER_04: I have not yet ordered them.
• 11:08
  SPEAKER_04: So donation, I'm still on on top of that.
• 11:12
  SPEAKER_04: Sounds like you're falling behind.
• 11:13
  SPEAKER_04: Uh way behind.
• 11:14
  SPEAKER_04: I'm sorry.
• 11:15
  SPEAKER_01: The Reggie Bar has been declared the best candy bar um of all times in this house.
• 11:21
  SPEAKER_01: However, the person claiming that may be incorrect because the best candy bar of all times is the salted nut roll, the Pearson's salted nut roll.
• 11:31
  SPEAKER_01: Greatest candy bar of all times.
• 11:34
  SPEAKER_01: I would have to say.
• 11:35
  SPEAKER_01: Have we all had these?
• 11:36
  SPEAKER_01: If not, I'm gonna have to I'm gonna have to make sure we have them around for you all to try.
• 11:42
  SPEAKER_07: I have not, so you better order a case.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 11:44
  SPEAKER_07: All right, done.
• 11:45
  SPEAKER_03: I haven't had the Pearson ones, but I've had uh different kinds of nut rolls.
• 11:49
  SPEAKER_03: They have a skippy one out.
• 11:51
  SPEAKER_03: I saw uh at the store when I was there, Target.
• 11:54
  SPEAKER_03: I think Skippy nut roll.
• 11:57
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I could get two salted nut rolls, Pearson salted nut rolls, I think two for a dollar, the local ace hardware.
• 12:05
  SPEAKER_01: So I will go and uh stock up their actually.
• 12:08
  SPEAKER_07: If it's sold in the same aisle as a screwdriver, does it make it a tool?
• 12:13
  SPEAKER_01: No, but you are drinking.
• 12:18
  SPEAKER_01: If they're frozen, if they're frozen, they're they're they could be deadly, so you just never know.
• 12:23
  SPEAKER_01: Um, okay, perfect.
• 12:24
  SPEAKER_01: I've got now I'm gonna switch gears here.
• 12:27
  SPEAKER_01: Uh some questions came up around the episode Superpowers That Suck.
• 12:33
  SPEAKER_01: Now, I know this was a fairly well-documented list.
• 12:38
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Todd, you spent a lot of time really trying to find legitimate uses for very ridiculous powers.
• 12:43
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, Vale, you were not really really buying into some of Todd's ideas and and Lemmox.
• 12:51
  SPEAKER_01: I believe you had a little bit of difficulty with the diff distinction between reptiles and amphibians.
• 12:59
  SPEAKER_01: And I think there's some questions about this.
• 13:01
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but first, uh your your superpower is that I I'm gonna if I were to to give you uh all superpowers, I I think I think the first one that I would give you was that you could instantly determine whether someone is eating a left Twix or a right Twix.
• 13:18
  SPEAKER_01: It's time to save humanity, and I think you're the guy to do it.
• 13:21
  SPEAKER_01: Wow, yeah, you're welcome.
• 13:23
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Vale, this is for you.
• 13:25
  SPEAKER_01: This was a question.
• 13:27
  SPEAKER_01: You know, with Todd spending the entire episode trying to convince you of some of these useless superpowers, that the usefulness of some of these.
• 13:35
  SPEAKER_01: Tonight, folks are wondering what useless superpower would you give him if you were to give him one?
• 13:43
  SPEAKER_03: Which one would I give Todd?
• 13:47
  SPEAKER_03: I would give him the uh ability to uh I don't know if it would be useless, but I think it would be a good one for him.
• 13:56
  SPEAKER_03: The ability not to get drunk while drinking alcohol.
• 14:02
  SPEAKER_03: Because that way when he has the tackle box, he can have multiple tackle boxes, and he'll definitely wear the hat and t-shirt for us.
• 14:10
  SPEAKER_03: Because that's what we're waiting on.
• 14:12
  SPEAKER_03: I want him to win uh I want him to win the boat.
• 14:15
  unknown: Right.
• 14:15
  SPEAKER_03: Trying, I'm trying.
• 14:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, you're not drinking enough.
• 14:18
  SPEAKER_03: You need to go.
• 14:19
  SPEAKER_03: So if you had the superpower of not getting drunk, you could just keep on going.
• 14:24
  SPEAKER_07: I would give him a power to control whole white milk.
• 14:29
  SPEAKER_03: By the way, uh Todd, I forgot to tell you, Grant from Illinois, speaking of uh this superpower, Grant from Illinois wants you on one of the episodes to buy a whole bunch of non-alcoholic beer and see if you can drink so much of it that you can actually get a buzz off of it.
• 14:46
  SPEAKER_04: That's a good choice.
• 14:48
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, that's funny.
• 14:49
  SPEAKER_04: That could be a superpower.
• 14:51
  SPEAKER_04: Buy non-alcoholic beer and get drunk off of it.
• 14:55
  SPEAKER_03: You'd have to drink uh like 49 of them.
• 14:57
  SPEAKER_03: I think we added it up.
• 15:00
  SPEAKER_03: In an hour.
• 15:01
  SPEAKER_04: In an hour.
• 15:02
  SPEAKER_04: Oh, just uh just get the funnel in the hat.
• 15:05
  SPEAKER_04: Just keep sipping away.
• 15:07
  SPEAKER_07: Just get an IV.
• 15:08
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 15:10
  SPEAKER_01: To add on to that question, what superpower, what useless superpower would you give to Lummox?
• 15:16
  SPEAKER_03: Well, it certainly wouldn't be immortality.
• 15:19
  SPEAKER_03: He he seemed to like that one way too much.
• 15:24
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 15:26
  SPEAKER_03: Lummox is uh useless superpower.
• 15:30
  SPEAKER_03: Everything turns into the ability to have the customer service numbers of all these uh fast food restaurants in his head so he doesn't have to use them at the window.
• 15:42
  SPEAKER_03: He can just call them immediately.
• 15:44
  SPEAKER_03: That would be a great superpower after he gets screwed at the drive-thru everywhere he goes.
• 15:49
  SPEAKER_07: I don't know how useless that would be.
• 15:51
  SPEAKER_07: It would come in handy because I try to call McDonald's no number.
• 15:54
  SPEAKER_07: Didn't have the number when I got Burger Kings.
• 15:56
  SPEAKER_07: Now I have the number.
• 15:57
  SPEAKER_07: That might actually come in the hand, it might come in handy.
• 16:00
  SPEAKER_04: Oh yeah.
• 16:01
  SPEAKER_04: Uh didn't you have a snafu one time uh a couple months ago at the McDonald's line?
• 16:09
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I I actually did.
• 16:11
  SPEAKER_01: Um, and I and I can see why having that superpower could be useful.
• 16:16
  SPEAKER_01: I um we had stopped in a small town.
• 16:19
  SPEAKER_01: We were going out into the country here to visit some relatives, and um, I ordered an iced decaffeinated coffee.
• 16:29
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I wanted.
• 16:30
  SPEAKER_01: And so I haven't had caffeine in a number of years, and um I don't like hot coffee.
• 16:35
  SPEAKER_01: I like cold coffee.
• 16:37
  SPEAKER_01: So the first round of uh the coffee incident was I received, well, I didn't get anything, right?
• 16:46
  SPEAKER_01: We're waiting, we're waiting, we're waiting.
• 16:48
  SPEAKER_01: Everybody's breakfast is done.
• 16:50
  SPEAKER_01: Uh nobody got a bagel.
• 16:52
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, I think for you, Lummocks, my superpower would be to enable you to have McDonald's have bagels at every one that you go to.
• 17:01
  SPEAKER_07: Um I would I would appreciate that.
• 17:03
  SPEAKER_07: I would appreciate that.
• 17:04
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 17:05
  SPEAKER_04: Just for you.
• 17:07
  SPEAKER_04: Decaf coffee.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: I did.
• 17:09
  SPEAKER_01: I did, I did.
• 17:10
  SPEAKER_01: A decaf, I said it.
• 17:12
  SPEAKER_03: Why are you drinking decaf?
• 17:13
  SPEAKER_03: Why would you drink coffee and it be decaf?
• 17:16
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I I struggle with this, I really do.
• 17:19
  SPEAKER_01: And I I actually made the statement this morning of the ridiculousness of drinking decaffeinated coffee because it doesn't taste good.
• 17:26
  SPEAKER_03: Useless superpower for you is loving decaf coffee for the rest of your life.
• 17:32
  SPEAKER_01: I already do, right?
• 17:34
  SPEAKER_01: So thanks.
• 17:35
  SPEAKER_01: Thanks for the great superpower.
• 17:37
  SPEAKER_07: So so the first finally I, since she hates, she doesn't like caffeinated coffee.
• 17:42
  SPEAKER_07: Her power would be would be to instantly summon 32 ounces of hot caffeinated coffee whenever she needed it.
• 17:51
  SPEAKER_07: That would be her useless superpower.
• 17:54
  SPEAKER_01: There we go.
• 17:55
  SPEAKER_01: My friends and neighbors would love me.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_01: Here you go.
• 17:58
  SPEAKER_01: And just be handing out coffee to everybody.
• 18:01
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, that would be very useless.
• 18:03
  SPEAKER_01: So we're waiting.
• 18:04
  SPEAKER_01: I finally go up to the counter and I look, and there's a hot coffee sitting there by itself, looking very lonely.
• 18:11
  SPEAKER_01: And I said, Excuse me, I didn't get my my coffee.
• 18:14
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, there it is.
• 18:15
  SPEAKER_01: So, well, I ordered a nice coffee, and they had to go through and look at the receipt.
• 18:20
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, you did.
• 18:21
  SPEAKER_01: And so, why don't you take that one?
• 18:23
  SPEAKER_01: So, okay, and go sit down.
• 18:25
  SPEAKER_01: I wait, and I wait, I wait.
• 18:27
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know, uh how long was it?
• 18:30
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, we waited a little bit.
• 18:31
  SPEAKER_04: I went up.
• 18:32
  SPEAKER_04: That's how long we waited.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 18:34
  SPEAKER_01: And um, I think you told them something, but I don't think you came back with anything.
• 18:39
  SPEAKER_01: And a little while later, the young the young woman who was working at the McDonald's came back with a tray with another coffee, a glass of ice, and a cup of milk for me, and uh another cup with some vanilla flavoring in it.
• 18:56
  SPEAKER_01: So I I I like to call it my deconstructed uh iced vanilla.
• 19:03
  SPEAKER_01: It was a vanilla iced decaf coffee.
• 19:06
  SPEAKER_01: I get to pour it all together, and and uh yeah, that was how my McDonald's went.
• 19:11
  SPEAKER_03: They made you make it yourself, huh?
• 19:13
  SPEAKER_01: They made me make it myself.
• 19:14
  SPEAKER_03: We're not gonna do this.
• 19:15
  SPEAKER_03: This woman's just gonna complain.
• 19:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 19:19
  SPEAKER_01: I think her name's Karen or something.
• 19:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, they were expecting me to go yell at the manager for not getting my not great.
• 19:26
  SPEAKER_07: Everybody hide all the bacon too.
• 19:27
  SPEAKER_07: We'll screw that.
• 19:28
  SPEAKER_07: She got she got Burger Kinged at McDonald's.
• 19:33
  SPEAKER_01: I think next time I'm just gonna tell them here, let me come back behind the counter.
• 19:37
  SPEAKER_01: I'll just make my own lunch.
• 19:38
  SPEAKER_03: Um that's my saying.
• 19:40
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I said.
• 19:41
  SPEAKER_03: Just get out of the way, subway.
• 19:43
  SPEAKER_03: Let me just do it myself.
• 19:44
  SPEAKER_03: You're too way too slow.
• 19:48
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 19:49
  SPEAKER_01: Next question.
• 19:51
  SPEAKER_01: This comes back, comes to the um, well, and actually, I let me take a step back here.
• 19:56
  SPEAKER_01: You know, Lenny's, this is something that just came in.
• 20:00
  SPEAKER_01: Um, people are feeling like you need to really reclaim some some of your uh dunness here.
• 20:09
  SPEAKER_01: They they need you to clear your record.
• 20:11
  SPEAKER_01: They're asking for a rapid fire, no assistance for your from your co-hosts, determine reptile or amphibian.
• 20:18
  SPEAKER_01: Are you up for this?
• 20:20
  SPEAKER_07: Sure, yes.
• 20:22
  SPEAKER_01: All right, all right.
• 20:27
  SPEAKER_01: There's only there's only five, but people are concerned.
• 20:30
  SPEAKER_01: They really want you to to to be able to determine this.
• 20:32
  SPEAKER_01: I think this is something that actually would be a useful superpower to have first.
• 20:37
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, ready?
• 20:38
  SPEAKER_01: Frog.
• 20:40
  SPEAKER_06: Amphibian.
• 20:41
  SPEAKER_01: Good job.
• 20:42
  SPEAKER_01: Turtle, reptile, salamander, amphibian, lizard, reptile, alligator, reptile, duh.
• 20:55
  SPEAKER_07: Both.
• 20:56
  SPEAKER_01: Good job.
• 20:57
  SPEAKER_01: Good job.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: Proud of you.
• 20:58
  SPEAKER_01: Way to go.
• 20:59
  SPEAKER_01: Way to way to reclaim your title of awesomeness.
• 21:04
  SPEAKER_04: Lummox.
• 21:05
  SPEAKER_04: He's ready for smarter than a Todd now.
• 21:08
  SPEAKER_04: There he is.
• 21:09
  SPEAKER_01: Right, there we go.
• 21:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh he's he's black and black.
• 21:13
  SPEAKER_07: There is only one black and black, and his name is Todd.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 21:17
  SPEAKER_03: Thank goodness that wasn't a hot seat switch.
• 21:20
  SPEAKER_03: I would have nailed it.
• 21:22
  SPEAKER_04: I would have nailed it.
• 21:26
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you know, in future, future quarterly reviews, we may we may have to do the hot seat switch.
• 21:31
  SPEAKER_01: I like this.
• 21:32
  SPEAKER_01: Um, from your from your 90s episode, you guys covered a whole lot of stuff.
• 21:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um, it really was a glorious period where we could do something humiliating and there wasn't necessarily photographic evidence.
• 21:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um, for all of you, this is a question for all of you.
• 21:49
  SPEAKER_01: What 90s technology could you bring back tomorrow and genuinely be happy about?
• 21:55
  SPEAKER_07: The Super Nintendo.
• 21:56
  SPEAKER_07: Oh, yeah.
• 21:57
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 21:58
  SPEAKER_07: All right.
• 22:00
  SPEAKER_04: I still bring out the box to the wood burning uh fire pit too.
• 22:07
  SPEAKER_04: So I still use my box with CDs sometimes and get all the hits in and the deep tracks.
• 22:14
  SPEAKER_04: I like those.
• 22:15
  SPEAKER_01: What about you, Vale?
• 22:17
  SPEAKER_01: What would you bring back?
• 22:18
  SPEAKER_03: Uh I would bring back my well, I know I had a see what I'm thinking when I bought it.
• 22:25
  SPEAKER_03: It had to be in the early 90s.
• 22:28
  SPEAKER_03: The CD Walkman had one of those nice ones that uh you could you could actually jog and it was uh CD playing a C D, not a tape.
• 22:39
  SPEAKER_03: C D Walkman.
• 22:40
  SPEAKER_03: Was that the Disc Man?
• 22:42
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, the Disc Man.
• 22:43
  SPEAKER_01: Did you actually jog with it on?
• 22:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 22:47
  SPEAKER_01: Good for you.
• 22:49
  SPEAKER_03: You don't think I jogged?
• 22:51
  SPEAKER_01: No, I'm just asking.
• 22:52
  SPEAKER_01: I didn't know you then, so I wasn't.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_01: I was in shape.
• 22:54
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I was I was I was playing uh high school and college sports, so yes, I actually had to do exercise.
• 23:02
  SPEAKER_04: So if he brought that back, would he exercise?
• 23:05
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 23:06
  SPEAKER_07: No, he wouldn't.
• 23:08
  SPEAKER_07: No, he wouldn't.
• 23:11
  SPEAKER_01: I believe I still have my sports Walkman somewhere in here.
• 23:16
  SPEAKER_03: I would get on my uh uh whatever that ding's called, one of those uh the treadmill, but there's also that one that you kind of like you see the elliptical.
• 23:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, no, it's a take off the Norditrack.
• 23:30
  SPEAKER_03: That Tony guy made it.
• 23:31
  SPEAKER_03: He had like long, he had long glowing hair.
• 23:35
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, yep, I forget what that was called, but I remember the commercials.
• 23:39
  SPEAKER_03: I have one of those down the basement.
• 23:40
  SPEAKER_03: That's what I would do.
• 23:41
  SPEAKER_03: The man sculptor.
• 23:43
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah.
• 23:44
  SPEAKER_04: And then he would plug in his VHS and put in uh Miss Fair.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_03: I have one.
• 23:49
  SPEAKER_03: I have VHS down there too.
• 23:51
  SPEAKER_03: I could put something in there.
• 23:53
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, and put the put the old blockbuster uh video uh VHS I still have.
• 24:02
  SPEAKER_07: You would use that elliptical, and then you'd get off and use the uh the Chuck Norris total body workout.
• 24:09
  SPEAKER_01: That's fantastic.
• 24:10
  SPEAKER_01: I think I would bring back either the sports Walkman, which I think I still have, but that thing was really cool at the time, and bright yellow, or uh my ability to wear baby doll t-shirts again, uh without looking obscene.
• 24:24
  SPEAKER_01: I think uh from the 90s, that was a good time for Jenny and or for Duchess, and I would like to uh be able to do that again.
• 24:33
  SPEAKER_01: Last question in this in this uh group uh in this around this episode.
• 24:40
  SPEAKER_01: What 90s technology do people claim to miss that actually really, really sucked?
• 24:46
  SPEAKER_07: I don't know.
• 24:47
  SPEAKER_07: I haven't surveyed people with this question.
• 24:50
  SPEAKER_04: The the disc man that always skipped.
• 24:52
  SPEAKER_04: It was like a walkman.
• 24:54
  SPEAKER_04: And then you had to buy the good one.
• 24:55
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, you had you had to spend the extra ten dollars, Todd.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, Todd.
• 24:58
  SPEAKER_07: Oh, okay.
• 25:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 25:02
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say the uh the the briefcase phone.
• 25:08
  SPEAKER_01: That was it, that was a at the time kind of a neat technology.
• 25:12
  SPEAKER_01: Remember the phone in the bag?
• 25:14
  SPEAKER_01: Uh that you know, the big phone.
• 25:16
  SPEAKER_01: That kind of sucked, those phones or beepers.
• 25:19
  SPEAKER_07: Everybody the briefcase phone was actually more like late 80s, because by the time the 90s came around, we already had we had better cell phones.
• 25:26
  SPEAKER_07: I know I had them.
• 25:27
  SPEAKER_01: Well, you lived on the east coast.
• 25:29
  SPEAKER_01: I lived out here in the middle of the country.
• 25:31
  SPEAKER_01: And so you're in a different time zone.
• 25:33
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, exactly.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_01: Exactly.
• 25:35
  SPEAKER_01: We did not have the fancy phones like you all did um until much later.
• 25:42
  SPEAKER_01: And in fact, my my father had one for many, many years.
• 25:46
  SPEAKER_01: Uh and and because when he's out way west where where we um where my dad spends some time farming, that was the only way he could get a signal is with one of those suitcase phones.
• 26:00
  SPEAKER_01: And so that, you know, useful for him, but kind of sucky for the for everybody else.
• 26:05
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I know we we weren't fancy like you guys.
• 26:07
  SPEAKER_01: We were still uh riding in uh horse and buggies out here by the time that came.
• 26:13
  SPEAKER_01: No, no car phones.
• 26:15
  SPEAKER_07: My car phone came in handy when we weren't able to pay the house phone bill because it got wasted on uh other necessities for other roommates, and we had to make a we had to make phone calls.
• 26:25
  SPEAKER_07: So we had to go out to the car to make our phone calls.
• 26:28
  SPEAKER_04: Yep.
• 26:29
  SPEAKER_04: That's another 90s thing, one 1900 numbers.
• 26:33
  SPEAKER_04: Call up.
• 26:34
  SPEAKER_05: Oh, yeah.
• 26:35
  SPEAKER_04: Forever party zone party thing.
• 26:38
  SPEAKER_04: Nintendo hotline.
• 26:40
  SPEAKER_04: Nintendo hotline, maybe a little porn, probably, too sprinkled in there somehow.
• 26:45
  SPEAKER_01: I I I don't think I want to know about that.
• 26:48
  SPEAKER_01: I I think that's a discussion for another time.
• 26:51
  SPEAKER_01: Um so so Vale, to you to the point that you brought up about being, you know, playing football and being in shape and having to work out.
• 26:59
  SPEAKER_01: There were a number of questions that came in around the big time sports moments.
• 27:04
  SPEAKER_01: There was a lot of things you guys covered, right?
• 27:07
  SPEAKER_01: The miracle on ice, one that's very close to my heart, having been a hockey fan my whole life.
• 27:12
  SPEAKER_01: Uh the Buffalo Bills wide right.
• 27:15
  SPEAKER_01: That one I I had to learn about when I listened to you guys.
• 27:18
  SPEAKER_01: Um, but there was one other that that folks had questions about.
• 27:22
  SPEAKER_01: It was apparently a really truly legendary high school scrimmage uh between uh the two two of you on this on this episode.
• 27:32
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Lummox and Vale.
• 27:33
  SPEAKER_01: I need to know how this high school scrimmage achieved equal billing with the miracle on ice.
• 27:43
  SPEAKER_03: Uh well, it was a miracle that uh a lot of kids on my team actually made it out without being injured.
• 27:51
  SPEAKER_03: That's number one.
• 27:54
  SPEAKER_07: It was a miracle that I made it out without getting stabbed in the eye by the umbrella of the angry mom.
• 28:01
  SPEAKER_03: So yeah.
• 28:03
  SPEAKER_03: Look, the the Lummox's team had uh people going to uh Division I football.
• 28:10
  SPEAKER_03: Some even went to the NFL that day.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_05: Okay.
• 28:13
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, you know, uh that we played that day.
• 28:16
  SPEAKER_03: You know, it was just a look, they're they're the one of the top teams in Maryland at the time, and we are probably one of the worst teams.
• 28:22
  SPEAKER_03: So how that scrimmage even came about, I don't know.
• 28:24
  SPEAKER_03: I guess they just needed someone to beat up on.
• 28:27
  SPEAKER_03: And our coach said, sure, we'll drive down there and do that.
• 28:30
  SPEAKER_03: So that's what we did.
• 28:32
  SPEAKER_03: Buddy.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 28:33
  SPEAKER_01: So, so uh honey, this is a question for you.
• 28:37
  SPEAKER_01: Um, you've heard the story a million times.
• 28:40
  SPEAKER_01: I'm sure you've heard the story before.
• 28:42
  SPEAKER_01: Um, which of the two of them do you believe has exaggerated the story more than the other over the years?
• 28:51
  SPEAKER_01: And has the story changed over the years?
• 28:54
  SPEAKER_01: Or is the story told the same way every single time?
• 28:58
  SPEAKER_04: I am gonna go out on a limb and say that that was the first time I heard that story, or the first time I could remember hearing it.
• 29:06
  SPEAKER_04: And if it wasn't, it was a long time ago, maybe just sitting around in the at college back in the day.
• 29:13
  SPEAKER_04: But I do not remember hearing that story at all.
• 29:16
  SPEAKER_07: I don't think we've I don't think I've ever told you that story before.
• 29:19
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I don't think we've ever talked it.
• 29:21
  SPEAKER_03: We never even talked about it.
• 29:22
  SPEAKER_03: I don't think so.
• 29:23
  SPEAKER_03: I've never heard of it.
• 29:24
  SPEAKER_03: I went to break brought it up.
• 29:26
  SPEAKER_03: I don't want to relive those memories.
• 29:28
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 29:31
  SPEAKER_03: Alex and I did know when we met our freshman year and he said where he played, we kind of laughed about it because then we talked about some people that were on his team that went off the some bigger.
• 29:41
  SPEAKER_07: I remember that we were on the uh the infield of the track.
• 29:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 29:45
  SPEAKER_07: We were getting all rounded up, ready to do our sprints or whatever, and we started talking.
• 29:48
  SPEAKER_07: And that's uh yeah, I remember that.
• 29:51
  SPEAKER_03: But then but then that was it after that.
• 29:52
  SPEAKER_03: So Todd Todd didn't really know that story at all.
• 29:57
  SPEAKER_01: I'm shocked.
• 29:58
  SPEAKER_01: I would have thought that that would have been just in the normal rotation.
• 30:03
  SPEAKER_01: I mean, really, truly.
• 30:04
  SPEAKER_07: You gotta save some stories for the right moment.
• 30:09
  SPEAKER_04: It's holding on to that one for 30 years.
• 30:12
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, and I used it on the done downgrade of sports moments, the right moment.
• 30:17
  SPEAKER_04: Uh that was more like a synapses firing.
• 30:20
  SPEAKER_04: I remember this one time.
• 30:24
  SPEAKER_01: Who knew that how many other years ago that would have been now?
• 30:28
  SPEAKER_01: That you know, holding on to the secret would pay off all these years later.
• 30:33
  SPEAKER_01: I I will say, while I I think that's uh incredibly interesting, very cool that you that you got to play against each other.
• 30:41
  SPEAKER_01: Vale, I'm sorry, your coach uh tried to kill you all.
• 30:45
  SPEAKER_01: That's really unfortunate.
• 30:46
  SPEAKER_01: Um there's no way that this would ever in a million years in my heart equal the miracle on ice, the greatest sports moment in my lifetime, other than of course Nadia Komanic getting a perfect 10 in gymnastics, uh, which you also left off the list.
• 31:08
  SPEAKER_01: So okay.
• 31:10
  SPEAKER_01: Next next uh next set of questions.
• 31:14
  SPEAKER_01: Now this one I I think we'll we'll talk for a minute, um, and then we've got to go to one that's really also very near and dear to my heart.
• 31:23
  SPEAKER_01: But this one, you know, you guys have watched a lot of really bad movies, and I have gotten to watch a lot of these really bad movies as well.
• 31:34
  SPEAKER_01: Um I I think you found two quite possibly the worst movies ever made meth gator and cracoon.
• 31:42
  SPEAKER_01: I uh I I I think you've you've reached the pinnacle of of terrible movies.
• 31:47
  SPEAKER_01: So I gotta know the folks want to know.
• 31:51
  SPEAKER_01: Methgator versus Cracoon, neutral territory, no water advantage, who's gonna win?
• 31:57
  SPEAKER_03: Well, methator's gonna win that one easily.
• 32:02
  SPEAKER_03: You can't shoot him.
• 32:03
  SPEAKER_03: He he he goes from small to big, big is enough to take down a uh radio tower, radio tower.
• 32:12
  SPEAKER_03: So I think the meth gator would take that.
• 32:15
  SPEAKER_03: And I would say this.
• 32:17
  SPEAKER_03: Methgator was much better, I think was better than Killer Sofa was.
• 32:23
  SPEAKER_07: I'm gonna say this.
• 32:24
  SPEAKER_07: Look, these these people they make these movies, hats off to them.
• 32:27
  SPEAKER_07: I haven't made it.
• 32:28
  SPEAKER_07: I you know, I'm not making movies.
• 32:30
  SPEAKER_07: Congrats to them for making movies.
• 32:32
  SPEAKER_07: Cracoon was hilarious sitting there watching it.
• 32:37
  SPEAKER_07: So it's not like Killer Sofa, which I will never again watch for the rest of my life.
• 32:43
  SPEAKER_07: I could see myself sitting down in a drunken stupor and watching Cracoon again and laughing at some of that shit.
• 32:48
  SPEAKER_07: So it it had its moments.
• 32:50
  SPEAKER_07: I I just think the uh and I think that the the puppet that they were the you know, the Muppet they created for that thing, they could have been a little bit better.
• 32:57
  SPEAKER_07: But again, they made a movie.
• 32:58
  SPEAKER_07: I don't have a movie on Tubi, they have a movie on Tubi, so they're ahead of me.
• 33:02
  SPEAKER_01: I I did, I blanked out when it came to Killer Sofa.
• 33:05
  SPEAKER_01: And so, yeah, I would have to agree.
• 33:07
  SPEAKER_01: In the grand scheme, that one did out worse uh these two by the things.
• 33:14
  SPEAKER_07: And the reason is at least Kracoon had some action.
• 33:16
  SPEAKER_07: I mean, in Killer's Sofa, you stared at the sofa and you panned off, and then you came back and stared at the sofa again.
• 33:22
  SPEAKER_07: I'm like, fucking do something.
• 33:25
  SPEAKER_07: You're just sitting there.
• 33:26
  SPEAKER_03: You couldn't, the sofa could blow out your match.
• 33:32
  SPEAKER_07: At least the cracoon was like turning into the flying squirrel and coming in off camera, right?
• 33:37
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, and jumping into people's jugulars and taking them out.
• 33:39
  SPEAKER_07: I mean, it was action.
• 33:41
  SPEAKER_04: And the CGI in Cracoon was top-notch when they panned to those two raccoons.
• 33:48
  SPEAKER_04: When he was sneaking up on the angry girlfriend by the riverside, yeah, and then they CGI, we forgot to say he did take out the doctor too.
• 33:56
  SPEAKER_04: They CGI that so there were two parts in that movie.
• 34:00
  SPEAKER_04: We scamped over that one.
• 34:03
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 34:04
  SPEAKER_01: So so the next question that came in, I thought this was a particularly good one.
• 34:08
  SPEAKER_01: So let's put on our imagination hats for a second.
• 34:13
  SPEAKER_01: So you're spending the night locked inside a Walmart with one of them, either the meth gator or the kracoon.
• 34:19
  SPEAKER_01: You may select one item from Walmart to defend yourself.
• 34:25
  SPEAKER_01: Which one?
• 34:26
  SPEAKER_01: What item are you taking?
• 34:30
  SPEAKER_07: So, what region of the country am I in in this Walmart?
• 34:35
  SPEAKER_07: Because that dictates what's available to me within said Walmart.
• 34:40
  SPEAKER_07: That's what I was thinking too, because there are guns in my in a Walmart in New York City or am I in a Walmart in you know Huntsville, Alabama, because there's a big difference as to what's available.
• 34:53
  SPEAKER_01: We're gonna say uh let's go for New York City, just to make it a challenge here.
• 34:59
  SPEAKER_07: So you're gonna you're gonna take away my gun.
• 35:01
  SPEAKER_07: So I'm gonna go with I'm gonna go with the raccoon and I'm gonna I'm gonna go with a baseball bat.
• 35:07
  SPEAKER_07: And when that when that fucker jumps off screen right and tries to launch at me, I'm gonna just swing and hit it.
• 35:14
  SPEAKER_01: How about you guys?
• 35:16
  SPEAKER_04: I'm gonna take the machete and go with it.
• 35:19
  SPEAKER_03: I'm just gonna say like Garrett and Vermont can get you can get machetes apparently at Walmart.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_03: Right.
• 35:25
  SPEAKER_03: And treat it like uh live fruit ninja.
• 35:28
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, fruit ninja.
• 35:30
  SPEAKER_04: Just go to town.
• 35:31
  SPEAKER_01: I thought about this a lot, and I I have to go with Kracoon as well.
• 35:35
  SPEAKER_01: Um, Kracoon, you know, wasn't great to women, however, uh, and I would I would stand in the Oreo line and I'd make I'd give that thing Oreos until it got so full and so sick it wouldn't be able to move.
• 35:49
  SPEAKER_01: That's what I would do.
• 35:51
  SPEAKER_07: I don't know if met gator could fit in a Walmart.
• 35:54
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 35:56
  SPEAKER_04: True, true that, true that.
• 35:59
  SPEAKER_01: So so the the next the next uh section, I think this one was this one I I really was excited about when I heard about the the show that you were doing.
• 36:11
  SPEAKER_01: The mayonnaise episode.
• 36:14
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I I would say, you know, an hour and four minutes talking about mayonnaise was just really right up my alley.
• 36:20
  SPEAKER_01: That that's you debated the best sandwich mayonnaise, which is of course is Hellman's.
• 36:24
  SPEAKER_01: Uh you talked about the mayonnaise multiverse, the mayo civil war.
• 36:29
  SPEAKER_01: You wandered into a question about people ordering waffles medium rare.
• 36:34
  SPEAKER_01: I need to know a little bit about more of that.
• 36:38
  SPEAKER_03: I don't know why this is such a hard thing to understand, right?
• 36:42
  SPEAKER_03: When you cook a waffle on a waffle maker, do you ever open it up?
• 36:46
  SPEAKER_03: Do you wait for the thing to beep and then you open it up?
• 36:49
  SPEAKER_03: Or do you open it up and check to see if it's totally cooked through?
• 36:56
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I wait for the beep because it's a belt here wasn't in the beep.
• 37:00
  SPEAKER_03: So if you lift it up earlier than the beep, because you like the your waffle in the middle to be non-cooked through, still gloopy, as Todd would say.
• 37:12
  SPEAKER_03: You can make that face all you want, but there's plenty of people who like it that way.
• 37:16
  SPEAKER_03: So they get it medium rare.
• 37:17
  SPEAKER_03: I don't understand why this is so hard for people to comprehend on what a medium rare waffle or medium rare pancake would be.
• 37:25
  SPEAKER_03: The middle's gloopy.
• 37:26
  SPEAKER_03: That's what it is.
• 37:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's like a medium rare steak, same thing.
• 37:30
  SPEAKER_03: Like raw?
• 37:31
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, people eat it that way.
• 37:33
  SPEAKER_03: My kids eat it that way.
• 37:35
  SPEAKER_01: And they haven't gotten sick?
• 37:37
  SPEAKER_01: That's raw flour, raw eggs in the middle.
• 37:40
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, oh, son, that is that is not that is not right.
• 37:45
  SPEAKER_07: I may have to get the technical definition of gloopy.
• 37:48
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, yeah.
• 37:50
  SPEAKER_03: That's Todd's word, gloopy.
• 37:54
  SPEAKER_01: I don't, yeah, I know exactly what he's talking about.
• 37:57
  SPEAKER_01: There is no gloopiness in egg and flour-based products.
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_03: Right?
• 38:01
  SPEAKER_03: Light crust is the same thing.
• 38:03
  SPEAKER_03: You can call it light crust.
• 38:04
  SPEAKER_03: That's what it now at on pizza sites.
• 38:06
  SPEAKER_03: It says you want light crust.
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 38:08
  SPEAKER_01: What does that mean?
• 38:09
  SPEAKER_03: That means that you don't want it cooked, like that.
• 38:12
  SPEAKER_03: You don't want the the black or the dark brown on the crust going around your pizza or little brown on the cheese, that type of thing.
• 38:22
  SPEAKER_01: I'm taking a minute here to just take this all in.
• 38:25
  SPEAKER_01: Um, again, being you know, living where we live, yeah, these these things have not been.
• 38:30
  SPEAKER_03: You eat square pizza.
• 38:31
  SPEAKER_03: So you're not allowed to jump in on this because no one eats square pizza.
• 38:35
  SPEAKER_03: That's more ridiculous than what I'm saying.
• 38:37
  SPEAKER_01: Oh no, no, oh, contrario.
• 38:39
  SPEAKER_01: So the wonderful thing about square cut pizza, since you asked, is that you get way more middles, right?
• 38:46
  SPEAKER_01: You get way more middles.
• 38:47
  SPEAKER_01: The whole thing is middles, and then if you're like me and you don't like the crust, you just hand that to John and he eats the crusty parts, and I get the middle of the pie.
• 38:58
  SPEAKER_01: But the cheese has to be melty and the dough can't be raw.
• 39:03
  SPEAKER_01: That's or gloopy.
• 39:06
  SPEAKER_03: Or gloopy.
• 39:07
  SPEAKER_03: I like my dough more on the raw side than I do on the burnt side.
• 39:12
  SPEAKER_01: How do you pick it up and fold it in half?
• 39:14
  SPEAKER_01: Doesn't it just gloop out?
• 39:15
  SPEAKER_01: That's what gloopy means, by the way.
• 39:16
  SPEAKER_01: It gloops out when you pick it up.
• 39:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 39:22
  SPEAKER_01: Don't you fold it?
• 39:24
  SPEAKER_01: Don't you feel don't you fold all pizza?
• 39:27
  SPEAKER_03: It's thin crust on the bottom, so it's not like it's thick.
• 39:30
  SPEAKER_01: You're supposed to be the voice of reason here, and I'm I'm gonna have to argue.
• 39:34
  SPEAKER_03: I am I'm telling you what people order.
• 39:37
  SPEAKER_01: Huh.
• 39:38
  SPEAKER_03: Different, obviously, than what you order.
• 39:40
  SPEAKER_01: Is it is people just you?
• 39:42
  SPEAKER_03: It's like no.
• 39:44
  SPEAKER_03: Have you ever been to a Cinnabon?
• 39:45
  SPEAKER_01: Uh no.
• 39:47
  SPEAKER_07: They don't have them, and then there's parts.
• 39:50
  SPEAKER_01: No, I make them I make them homemade.
• 39:52
  SPEAKER_01: So why would I go to a Cinnabon?
• 39:53
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so in the middle of a cinnamon bun, do you want it?
• 39:56
  SPEAKER_03: Do you want it uh dark brown and hard and crusty on top, or do you want it where you can just stick your finger and smoosh it down?
• 40:04
  SPEAKER_03: Glooped.
• 40:06
  SPEAKER_03: Um But see, you asking these questions for someone who's never been to a Cinnabon, you have no idea compared to the uh 50 million people that have eaten cinnamon bun and know what I'm talking about.
• 40:16
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I have seen Cinnabon and I've seen other people eat them and they look raw in the middle to me.
• 40:21
  SPEAKER_03: Yes, exactly.
• 40:23
  SPEAKER_01: Like raw, raw.
• 40:24
  SPEAKER_01: Yes, exactly.
• 40:25
  SPEAKER_05: Extra gloopy.
• 40:27
  SPEAKER_05: Extra gloopy.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 40:30
  SPEAKER_01: Well, I'm impressed that your constitution uh can handle things like raw dough.
• 40:39
  SPEAKER_07: Well he went through years of training in college where he put his body to the test.
• 40:43
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
• 40:44
  SPEAKER_01: You know what really helped all of that?
• 40:46
  SPEAKER_01: Having I mean, how do you like your eggs?
• 40:49
  SPEAKER_01: Well, that's a whole nother thing.
• 40:51
  SPEAKER_01: I I yeah, I'm very picky, but I do not like them overcooked, and there can be no brown on an egg.
• 40:57
  SPEAKER_01: So so I understand.
• 40:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, what about your yolk?
• 41:00
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, that's gotta be hot and runny or warm and runny, absolutely.
• 41:04
  SPEAKER_01: And I do love I love a black and blue steak.
• 41:07
  SPEAKER_01: Like I will eat a steak that is cold and raw in the middle, no problem.
• 41:11
  SPEAKER_03: But so you have no problem eating a a uh totally uh cow that's mooing, but a uh gloom of pancake batter, disgust you.
• 41:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, I will not eat pancakes that are just want to make sure that uh the donations on the page here for the Dutch day that you'll drink you'll drink uh cow blood, but uh the gloopiness of the pancake discussion.
• 41:35
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 41:36
  SPEAKER_01: All right and I'll have a glass, I'll have a glass of milk with my uh rare as well.
• 41:41
  SPEAKER_03: Do you like that?
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_03: Whole milk?
• 41:42
  SPEAKER_01: Whole milk, whole milk, absolutely.
• 41:44
  SPEAKER_01: You got okay, good to know.
• 41:46
  SPEAKER_01: Thank you.
• 41:47
  SPEAKER_01: I know we got way off track here, but this was so confusing to me.
• 41:50
  SPEAKER_01: Um I'm sure we'll discuss this again sometime because I'll have a little more time to think about it.
• 41:57
  SPEAKER_01: So back to the mayonnaise.
• 41:59
  SPEAKER_01: Um the mayonnaise conversation, you know.
• 42:02
  SPEAKER_01: I don't know if you guys noticed, but I did bring a lovely salad to uh duh to try to sample um while you were talking.
• 42:14
  SPEAKER_01: And and I and I'm curious, and folks, folks here want to know, you know, when you're talking about salads, and I know uh Lummock's salad is kind of a four-letter word for you, where I come from, the presence of lettuce in a salad is is completely optional.
• 42:32
  SPEAKER_01: So I'm curious, um have you and would you and will you be interested in uh learning a little bit more about this?
• 42:42
  SPEAKER_01: Maybe if we were to have another conversation sometime called salad or not a salad, um, I think listeners would want to know uh what what you would uh constitute as a salad.
• 42:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um, would you try something like lime jello with mayonnaise in it, like uh like Doug got to eat that evening, which was actually very delicious.
• 43:03
  SPEAKER_07: Of course I would.
• 43:04
  SPEAKER_07: There's no vegetables in it.
• 43:08
  SPEAKER_07: There was fruit.
• 43:09
  SPEAKER_07: Right.
• 43:10
  SPEAKER_07: There was fruit and mayonnaise.
• 43:11
  SPEAKER_07: I would definitely try that.
• 43:13
  SPEAKER_04: And that's it, it had coconut in it, though.
• 43:17
  SPEAKER_07: So oh well, we might have to have some beer then to wash that down.
• 43:20
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, all right, good to know.
• 43:22
  SPEAKER_01: So, so back to the candy bar conversation.
• 43:24
  SPEAKER_01: There's actually a salad here called candy bar salad, and it is Snickers cut up.
• 43:32
  SPEAKER_01: There's salandar and oranges in it, uh, and there's cool whip.
• 43:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's basically your Snicker salad.
• 43:38
  SPEAKER_01: Sometimes, oh, and I think it's mixed with vanilla pudding mix that is not turned into pudding.
• 43:44
  SPEAKER_07: So just the why would you ruin a Snickers with fruit?
• 43:48
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
• 43:49
  SPEAKER_07: Why in the world would you take a beautiful Snickers candy bar, cut it up, and mix it with fruit?
• 43:56
  SPEAKER_01: Good question.
• 43:57
  SPEAKER_01: I take this back, it isn't oranges, it's apples.
• 44:00
  SPEAKER_01: It's apples green as well.
• 44:01
  SPEAKER_07: It doesn't make it any better.
• 44:02
  SPEAKER_07: Really?
• 44:02
  SPEAKER_03: Okay that just made it worse for me.
• 44:05
  SPEAKER_07: I'm gonna have my Snicker without the fruit gloop.
• 44:11
  SPEAKER_04: Could you use a Mars candy bar instead?
• 44:15
  SPEAKER_01: I I believe you could, but you'd have to call it Mars bar salad instead of sticker bar salad.
• 44:22
  SPEAKER_01: Because people will get confused, right?
• 44:23
  SPEAKER_04: Is that acceptable, Lummox?
• 44:26
  SPEAKER_07: Don't eat a candy bar.
• 44:28
  SPEAKER_07: You can cut it up.
• 44:29
  SPEAKER_07: We're not putting any fruit in there.
• 44:32
  SPEAKER_04: So no candy bars.
• 44:34
  unknown: Okay.
• 44:35
  SPEAKER_07: You can call it whatever you want.
• 44:36
  SPEAKER_07: You can call it Todd's Delicious Non-Salad salad.
• 44:39
  SPEAKER_07: It contains no vegetables and all it's got is candy bars.
• 44:42
  SPEAKER_07: I'll tear it up.
• 44:43
  SPEAKER_07: Add fruit and vegetables, you're ruining the candy bar.
• 44:46
  unknown: Okay.
• 44:47
  SPEAKER_01: Good to know.
• 44:48
  SPEAKER_01: Have you guys ever had anything like that?
• 44:50
  SPEAKER_03: Well, once you cut it up, once you cut up, it's not called a candy bar.
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, right.
• 44:54
  SPEAKER_03: It's called candy pieces.
• 44:56
  SPEAKER_01: It's a dessert.
• 44:57
  SPEAKER_01: I think we established that it's a fancy dessert if you're eating it with uh fork and knife, correct?
• 45:02
  SPEAKER_01: So no lime jello, cottage cheese, mayonnaise salad.
• 45:06
  SPEAKER_01: That's another delicious one.
• 45:08
  SPEAKER_01: Uh lime jello actually.
• 45:09
  SPEAKER_07: I'm only doing cottage cheese if I lose the bet.
• 45:12
  SPEAKER_07: If I lose fantasy, I'm not doing cottage cheese because I want to.
• 45:16
  SPEAKER_07: So no, don't ask me if I'm gonna put cottage cheese in with my candy bars and other stuff.
• 45:20
  SPEAKER_07: It's not part of the bet, and I'm not doing cottage cheese any other way.
• 45:24
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, good to know.
• 45:25
  SPEAKER_01: And I don't know of a single jello-based salad that has ham in it, but there's a very good peas, ham, uh cheddar cheese, and uh hard-boiled eggs with mayonnaise.
• 45:41
  SPEAKER_01: Absolutely delicious, one of my favorites of all time.
• 45:43
  SPEAKER_01: So I think Doll would agree that's a good salad.
• 45:46
  SPEAKER_01: Uh Vale, probably not the one for you, huh?
• 45:49
  SPEAKER_03: I'm not listening.
• 45:51
  SPEAKER_04: That's what he's eating.
• 45:53
  SPEAKER_04: He's eating that when he loses.
• 45:54
  SPEAKER_03: I'm I'm just ignoring this conversation as we're talking.
• 45:57
  SPEAKER_03: I'm waiting for the next question.
• 45:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 46:00
  SPEAKER_03: Next question, please.
• 46:01
  SPEAKER_01: All right.
• 46:02
  SPEAKER_01: Next question uh comes from the the meats episode.
• 46:06
  SPEAKER_01: I thought that was a really interesting one, and one that I think spoke really closely to all of your hearts.
• 46:12
  SPEAKER_01: I need to know if you could only eat one meat for the rest of your life, what would that one be?
• 46:21
  SPEAKER_07: One meat or one cut of meat?
• 46:23
  SPEAKER_07: If you say meat, I say cow, that covers a lot of things.
• 46:26
  SPEAKER_07: So is it just the the is it cow versus deer versus antelope versus bison, or is it you can only eat filet versus strip?
• 46:35
  SPEAKER_07: What are you asking?
• 46:36
  SPEAKER_01: That's a great question.
• 46:37
  SPEAKER_01: The the person that asked didn't clarify, but I will uh I'll go ahead and make a judgment call here.
• 46:42
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna say what cut of meat would it be?
• 46:45
  SPEAKER_07: Am I paying for it or is somebody else paying for it?
• 46:48
  SPEAKER_07: I'm only allowed to eat this one cut of meat for the rest of my life.
• 46:50
  SPEAKER_07: That's your superior lemmox.
• 46:52
  SPEAKER_07: Is it being paid for?
• 46:53
  SPEAKER_07: Because then I'm gonna go with filet.
• 46:54
  SPEAKER_07: I'll just eat fillet for the rest of my life.
• 46:56
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, yeah, someone else will pay for it.
• 46:59
  SPEAKER_01: Well, we'll add that to your McDonald's bagel uh superpower.
• 47:02
  SPEAKER_01: You get free meat, right?
• 47:04
  SPEAKER_01: But it's only one.
• 47:05
  SPEAKER_01: Free meat.
• 47:06
  SPEAKER_07: Free meat, then I'm just eating fillet for the rest of my life.
• 47:09
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, all right.
• 47:10
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, Vale, what about you?
• 47:12
  SPEAKER_03: I thought the uh Lemmox was gonna say Cracoon.
• 47:15
  SPEAKER_03: That would have been a good one.
• 47:16
  SPEAKER_07: That would have been a good that is in rare supply, it won't last me for the rest of my life.
• 47:21
  SPEAKER_07: There's only one of them out there.
• 47:22
  SPEAKER_07: I'd finish him off in an in a snack and I'd be done.
• 47:25
  SPEAKER_07: There'd be nothing else to eat for the rest of my life.
• 47:28
  SPEAKER_04: Well, you're immortal, so you're good.
• 47:30
  SPEAKER_07: I thought Vail took that away from me.
• 47:32
  SPEAKER_07: I'm no longer I took that that power away.
• 47:34
  SPEAKER_03: That's enough of that power.
• 47:37
  SPEAKER_04: That's enough of that.
• 47:38
  SPEAKER_03: Okay.
• 47:38
  SPEAKER_03: Uh mine would be ground beef.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_01: Ground beef.
• 47:43
  SPEAKER_01: What what fat ratio?
• 47:45
  SPEAKER_01: I I think you probably discussed this already.
• 47:47
  SPEAKER_03: It doesn't matter.
• 47:48
  SPEAKER_01: Extra glue.
• 47:49
  SPEAKER_07: So like a 70-30.
• 47:51
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 47:52
  SPEAKER_03: 20 2080.
• 47:55
  SPEAKER_01: So it's the white.
• 47:56
  SPEAKER_01: It comes in the plastic tube and it's white when you take it out.
• 47:59
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_01: Good to know.
• 48:01
  SPEAKER_01: What about you, duh?
• 48:02
  SPEAKER_01: I have an idea of what that would be.
• 48:04
  SPEAKER_01: Do you have any guess?
• 48:06
  SPEAKER_04: It would be pig.
• 48:07
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, you can guess.
• 48:08
  SPEAKER_01: Ribs.
• 48:09
  SPEAKER_01: You'd eat ribs for the rest of your life.
• 48:11
  SPEAKER_01: Not bacon.
• 48:12
  SPEAKER_01: Not bacon.
• 48:13
  SPEAKER_04: Bacon would be up there like home or something.
• 48:18
  SPEAKER_03: See, I'd like ribs, but I don't think I could eat them every day.
• 48:21
  SPEAKER_03: If I did ground beef, I could do manwitches and then you know, the super helper.
• 48:26
  SPEAKER_04: Gloppy Joes.
• 48:28
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I could do gloppy joes.
• 48:30
  SPEAKER_04: Extra gloppy, just the way you like it.
• 48:33
  SPEAKER_04: That's right.
• 48:34
  SPEAKER_07: Stop scaring me, lady.
• 48:40
  SPEAKER_01: Uh for for Lummox, I would have I would have put you as either a um, I would have thought, talk uh turkey leg, just walking around with giant turkey legs between your fingers, right?
• 48:52
  SPEAKER_01: Or the tomahawk steak.
• 48:54
  SPEAKER_01: I can picture you all Fred Flint stoning the giant tomahawk steak every single day.
• 49:00
  SPEAKER_07: See, I thought this through to the end.
• 49:02
  SPEAKER_07: Since Vale took away my immortality, I am going to eventually die.
• 49:06
  SPEAKER_07: I'm gonna get older, and I might not be able to eat the tomahawk steak in my 90s, but I could always eat a little piece of filet.
• 49:12
  SPEAKER_07: So and I wouldn't take the tomahawk and not eat it all because that's wasteful.
• 49:16
  SPEAKER_07: So I went with the fillet because if if I'm hungry, now I just order four fillets.
• 49:21
  SPEAKER_07: And then in my older years, if I can only one, I get one.
• 49:23
  SPEAKER_07: But the tomahawk is the fucking tomahawk, right?
• 49:26
  SPEAKER_07: You're gonna get this big ass thing with a with a nine-foot bone thrown on your plate, and I might not be able to eat that in my later years.
• 49:32
  SPEAKER_07: So I was thinking rationally about it.
• 49:35
  SPEAKER_03: All right, so so let's let's bring back your power of uh immortality.
• 49:40
  SPEAKER_03: You can have that.
• 49:41
  SPEAKER_07: Oh, so now I'm I'm immortal again now?
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 49:44
  SPEAKER_07: Okay, well, if I'm immortal now, then I'm going back to the tomahawk because I'll be eating that shit forever, and I'm not getting older.
• 49:50
  SPEAKER_07: I'm staying right now as this lummox, and this lummox can eat a tomahawk.
• 49:54
  SPEAKER_07: So if I'm this lummox forever to the end of time, then yes, I'm doing the tomahawk.
• 49:58
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 49:59
  SPEAKER_03: And you're paying for it.
• 50:01
  SPEAKER_03: I'll be dead, but you'll keep going.
• 50:03
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 50:03
  SPEAKER_03: On the Lummox podcast.
• 50:05
  SPEAKER_07: I'm gonna eat it every year.
• 50:07
  SPEAKER_07: Every year I'll have a I'll have a tomahawk at your gravesite and eat that in honor of you.
• 50:12
  SPEAKER_01: A rare tomahawk.
• 50:14
  SPEAKER_01: Of course, a gloopy one.
• 50:15
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 50:16
  SPEAKER_01: That makes sense.
• 50:18
  SPEAKER_01: Perfect.
• 50:19
  SPEAKER_01: So so uh one last one last question specific to uh the podcast.
• 50:26
  SPEAKER_01: Then, you know, of course, we have a lightning round to get to.
• 50:30
  SPEAKER_01: This wasn't came in and it was about your fantasy draft night.
• 50:34
  SPEAKER_01: No, full disclosure, I I kind of listened, but I kind of didn't.
• 50:39
  SPEAKER_01: I I you know, I get there's a lot of conversation around football uh in our in our lives in in this home and and a lot about the fantasy league.
• 50:48
  SPEAKER_01: And so, you know, I don't always pay attention.
• 50:51
  SPEAKER_01: So, you know, I'm glad somebody asked about this.
• 50:54
  SPEAKER_01: Um and this is to you, Doug.
• 50:58
  SPEAKER_01: The objective that you had around kind of arguing or misunderstanding, maybe the rules of the draft night.
• 51:07
  SPEAKER_01: Was it and and maybe I could use a little bit of coaching from you all.
• 51:13
  SPEAKER_01: Talk about the rules that you set up for that night and and why they seemed like they were so hard to follow uh by by just one person in the group.
• 51:20
  SPEAKER_07: So everybody's fantasy draft is the same.
• 51:23
  SPEAKER_07: You get in, you draw your you draw your order, you do a snake draft, you do a straight draft, whatever.
• 51:30
  SPEAKER_07: But there's no difference, right?
• 51:31
  SPEAKER_07: You're if you can normally you're in five different draft leagues, it's all the same rules basically.
• 51:35
  SPEAKER_07: But on down, we have to change it up.
• 51:37
  SPEAKER_07: We've got to do something different.
• 51:39
  SPEAKER_07: So that's why we came up with these rules.
• 51:42
  SPEAKER_07: Nobody else is thinking about this.
• 51:43
  SPEAKER_07: We do, we think outside the box.
• 51:45
  SPEAKER_07: So for our rules, you could only take one player from a given team, and with every round, you had to alternate conferences, so it made it more challenging than just picking the best player on Todd's cheat sheet.
• 51:57
  SPEAKER_07: You had to think about what you're doing and plan your picks ahead.
• 52:00
  SPEAKER_03: But for some of us, it's a lot easier to follow rules than others.
• 52:05
  SPEAKER_01: Go into this, because that was one of the questions, too, that came up of really which who among the three of you is least qualified to participate in any activity requiring requiring careful adherence to multiple rules.
• 52:18
  SPEAKER_01: I think we maybe we know that we know that answer.
• 52:20
  SPEAKER_01: Let's talk.
• 52:21
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah.
• 52:22
  unknown: Yeah.
• 52:22
  SPEAKER_01: So so tell us a little bit more.
• 52:24
  SPEAKER_03: We knew he was gonna mess up before we even started the draft.
• 52:28
  SPEAKER_03: It was just a matter of when that would happen.
• 52:32
  SPEAKER_01: Was there was there a side bet?
• 52:34
  SPEAKER_01: You know, I know during Super Bowl, uh, there's always side bets.
• 52:38
  SPEAKER_01: So, like how long the national anthem is gonna take, how long, you know, is the eagle that flies over gonna like pluck somebody's eyes out.
• 52:48
  SPEAKER_01: You know, there's always these side bets that go on.
• 52:49
  SPEAKER_01: Did you have a side bet on how long it was gonna take before Todd broke the rules?
• 52:54
  SPEAKER_07: No, Vegas had it set at round three, was the over-under, but I did not take the bet.
• 52:58
  SPEAKER_07: I should have.
• 53:01
  SPEAKER_01: And and defend yourself, Duh.
• 53:03
  SPEAKER_01: Let's hear it.
• 53:04
  SPEAKER_01: I was drunk at that time.
• 53:09
  SPEAKER_07: On his non-alcoholic beers.
• 53:11
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, I was uh the middle rounds.
• 53:14
  SPEAKER_04: I was already feeling it, and I messed up.
• 53:17
  SPEAKER_04: Okay, so that's and I didn't get him.
• 53:20
  SPEAKER_04: I saw it on the on the kiosk, and I was like, oh, I should get that, but then I forgot that I picked an NFC player before that.
• 53:28
  SPEAKER_04: So therefore, I screwed up and therefore he traded that that picked me.
• 53:34
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, and we all knew I was gonna screw up eventually.
• 53:36
  SPEAKER_04: It was just a matter of time.
• 53:39
  SPEAKER_04: I was trying not to, but it happened.
• 53:42
  SPEAKER_01: This is why I found 49 bottles of uh O'Dules in the recycling the next day.
• 53:47
  SPEAKER_04: I was trying to get there.
• 53:49
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, yeah.
• 53:50
  SPEAKER_01: That makes sense.
• 53:51
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 53:52
  SPEAKER_01: So so folks, I know this was wildly popular the last time.
• 53:56
  SPEAKER_01: Uh, I got a lot of feedback saying this was a really fun thing to have you guys do.
• 54:01
  SPEAKER_01: So I'd love to do it again if we can.
• 54:03
  SPEAKER_01: The lightning round.
• 54:05
  SPEAKER_01: So uh as you know how this works, if you remember how this works, I'm gonna ask the question and then you all have a chance to answer.
• 54:15
  SPEAKER_01: But I want to hear from each of you, or even if we need to make it even faster, just one of you.
• 54:21
  SPEAKER_01: Um the answer to each of these questions.
• 54:24
  SPEAKER_01: Are you guys ready to go?
• 54:26
  SPEAKER_05: Yes, yep.
• 54:28
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 54:29
  SPEAKER_01: So who is most likely to is the topic for our lightning round.
• 54:35
  SPEAKER_01: First question Who's most likely to survive methator?
• 54:39
  SPEAKER_03: Lummox.
• 54:40
  SPEAKER_07: I'd say the same thing, lummox.
• 54:42
  SPEAKER_07: That way.
• 54:48
  SPEAKER_01: Perfect.
• 54:49
  SPEAKER_01: I love a good Venn diagram.
• 54:50
  SPEAKER_01: Next one.
• 54:51
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely to befriend the Cracoon?
• 54:54
  SPEAKER_03: Todd.
• 54:55
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 54:57
  SPEAKER_03: I would have been buddies with him.
• 54:59
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely to accidentally take the math?
• 55:03
  SPEAKER_03: Todd.
• 55:04
  SPEAKER_02: Yes.
• 55:07
  SPEAKER_01: Who is most likely to lose an eating contest and then blame the rules?
• 55:13
  SPEAKER_03: Me.
• 55:14
  SPEAKER_03: Not me.
• 55:15
  SPEAKER_03: You know it's gonna be me.
• 55:17
  SPEAKER_03: I blame the rules on every uh damn, I mean, um smarter than a Todd.
• 55:23
  SPEAKER_01: How about who's most likely to get kicked out of a Costco?
• 55:29
  SPEAKER_03: All three of us.
• 55:31
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, I would say it's a three-way event on all of us.
• 55:36
  SPEAKER_01: Who's the most who's most likely to get the three of you kicked out of a bar?
• 55:41
  SPEAKER_07: Bail.
• 55:43
  SPEAKER_04: Yes.
• 55:45
  SPEAKER_04: That's and we would just watch it start.
• 55:49
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely to cause the emergency on a road trip?
• 55:54
  SPEAKER_04: Oh Todd.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 55:56
  SPEAKER_04: I'd take it.
• 55:57
  SPEAKER_04: I'd probably take that one, yeah.
• 55:59
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 56:00
  SPEAKER_01: Who's even though even though a road trip or an oyster eat?
• 56:04
  SPEAKER_03: There's there's a difference here.
• 56:06
  SPEAKER_03: Vale had me.
• 56:07
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, Vale had.
• 56:08
  SPEAKER_03: I have that one won already.
• 56:10
  SPEAKER_03: Yep.
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_01: Nope.
• 56:11
  SPEAKER_01: That's just a generic road trip, not not the oyster eat this time.
• 56:15
  SPEAKER_01: Because right, you you've won.
• 56:16
  SPEAKER_01: You're the king of the emergency uh oyster eat uh scenario.
• 56:22
  SPEAKER_01: Who's of the three of you gonna be the most absolutely useless during that emergency?
• 56:29
  SPEAKER_01: Todd.
• 56:32
  SPEAKER_01: Todd.
• 56:36
  SPEAKER_04: These questions just the for the duh.
• 56:38
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, no, it really these these ones were just ones that people wanted to know.
• 56:45
  SPEAKER_01: So there's no, you know, could be any of you.
• 56:48
  SPEAKER_07: And they're getting their unbiased answers, Todd.
• 56:50
  SPEAKER_07: So just deal with it.
• 56:51
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
• 56:52
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely to talk his way out of getting arrested?
• 56:57
  SPEAKER_04: Todd.
• 56:58
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 57:01
  SPEAKER_05: Todd.
• 57:04
  SPEAKER_04: Crazy to send me off to the rubber room for real.
• 57:09
  SPEAKER_01: Or it or it'd say something like, I don't know, after 21, who pays attention?
• 57:15
  SPEAKER_04: Step out of the car, please.
• 57:17
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 57:18
  SPEAKER_01: Uh next, uh, who's most likely to turn a warning into an arrest by continuing to talk?
• 57:25
  SPEAKER_01: I think we know this one.
• 57:27
  SPEAKER_03: Lummox.
• 57:28
  SPEAKER_03: Lummox.
• 57:28
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 57:29
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah.
• 57:30
  SPEAKER_03: That was an easy one.
• 57:32
  SPEAKER_03: Yes.
• 57:33
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely to spend the most money at a gas station?
• 57:37
  SPEAKER_03: Vale.
• 57:38
  SPEAKER_03: Vail.
• 57:42
  SPEAKER_03: 100% this gas station, uh, chicken man.
• 57:46
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 57:48
  SPEAKER_04: Uh we uh we we went on a road trip in college one time, and Vail gained 15 pounds from eating all gas station crap.
• 57:58
  SPEAKER_03: Speaking of They made fun of me because we went out to uh we made a road trip to Notre Dame and at a gas station I got biscuits and gravy.
• 58:06
  SPEAKER_04: Biscuits and gravy and eggs and toasts.
• 58:08
  SPEAKER_03: Like, that can't be good.
• 58:10
  SPEAKER_04: It was super gloopy.
• 58:13
  SPEAKER_01: You're the guy that orders the surf and turf at the diner.
• 58:16
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, correct?
• 58:18
  SPEAKER_01: The diner that's got the 50-page menu that has surf and turf on it that nobody ever orders.
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_01: It's you.
• 58:23
  SPEAKER_01: No, exactly.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_03: I got one.
• 58:26
  SPEAKER_03: Who who's the most likely to run a little old lady off the road in the express lane going 45 miles an hour?
• 58:34
  SPEAKER_03: Lomics.
• 58:35
  SPEAKER_03: Lomics.
• 58:39
  SPEAKER_01: Which one of you is the most likely to eat something after being explicitly told don't eat that?
• 58:46
  SPEAKER_04: Lomics.
• 58:48
  SPEAKER_04: I think all three of us I've done that.
• 58:52
  SPEAKER_01: Yes.
• 58:53
  SPEAKER_04: The Duchess is shaking her head.
• 58:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, uh, we've had a few uh who stole my lunch incidents in the last couple of weeks.
• 59:01
  SPEAKER_01: I think I make good lunches, obviously, and and I need to be a little bit more uh generous, possibly.
• 59:08
  SPEAKER_01: But yeah, got my lunches stolen.
• 59:11
  SPEAKER_01: Which one of you is most likely to survive a zombie apocalypse?
• 59:17
  SPEAKER_07: Lomics.
• 59:19
  SPEAKER_07: Yep.
• 59:20
  SPEAKER_01: Okay, and which one of you is most likely to be the reason the zombie apocalypse started?
• 59:26
  SPEAKER_04: Um that's that.
• 59:33
  SPEAKER_01: Who gave I didn't catch the answer to that one?
• 59:36
  SPEAKER_01: Oh, Todd is all right, yeah, yeah, fair enough.
• 59:38
  SPEAKER_03: 100% even Don Nation was yelling Todd out before uh got the end of that question.
• 59:45
  SPEAKER_01: Which one of you is most likely to confidently give directions to somewhere you've never ever been?
• 59:52
  SPEAKER_07: Lummics.
• 59:53
  SPEAKER_07: Lumicks.
• 59:55
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, that makes sense.
• 59:56
  SPEAKER_01: Which one of you is most likely to say, I know what I'm doing immediately before proving otherwise?
• 1:00:03
  SPEAKER_04: Uh I think uh we're all males, we probably all do that.
• 1:00:08
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
• 1:00:09
  SPEAKER_04: But yeah, that'd probably be me.
• 1:00:12
  SPEAKER_04: In this group.
• 1:00:13
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, male.
• 1:00:16
  SPEAKER_01: So there's two more, and these are kind of related.
• 1:00:18
  SPEAKER_01: Who's most likely or who of all of you had the best take, best opinion um this in during this quarter on Dow Down with the best one?
• 1:00:33
  SPEAKER_07: The best opinion?
• 1:00:34
  SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
• 1:00:36
  SPEAKER_07: On any on anything?
• 1:00:37
  SPEAKER_07: On anything?
• 1:00:38
  SPEAKER_01: On anything, yep.
• 1:00:41
  SPEAKER_07: I don't know, Vale.
• 1:00:42
  SPEAKER_07: You haven't had a lot, you take this one.
• 1:00:44
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:00:45
  SPEAKER_01: I'm gonna say the the the the medium rare uh conversation.
• 1:00:51
  SPEAKER_01: Uh that yeah, and that could also win the next one.
• 1:00:55
  SPEAKER_01: Who had the worst take on Dodd Down the Squarter?
• 1:00:58
  SPEAKER_01: I think it might have to be the medium rare baked goods.
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_01: What?
• 1:01:02
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, get out of here.
• 1:01:04
  SPEAKER_04: Or or black and black.
• 1:01:05
  unknown: Yeah.
• 1:01:06
  SPEAKER_07: Well, that was the worst and the worst knowledge of rock and roll music ever on the face of the planet, Todd.
• 1:01:14
  SPEAKER_04: Uh, come on, you make me feel bad.
• 1:01:17
  SPEAKER_01: And our last, our final lightning round question: Who is the most confidently wrong member of Dawd Down?
• 1:01:26
  SPEAKER_07: Todd.
• 1:01:27
  SPEAKER_07: Todd.
• 1:01:28
  SPEAKER_07: You should have seen the confidence in his voice when he told me the original oyster knife cost five thousand dollars.
• 1:01:35
  SPEAKER_07: And he was dead wrong.
• 1:01:37
  SPEAKER_07: Dead wrong.
• 1:01:38
  SPEAKER_07: Dead wrong.
• 1:01:40
  SPEAKER_01: Okay.
• 1:01:45
  SPEAKER_04: Nice.
• 1:01:46
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I would have to say I've learned a lot this time.
• 1:01:49
  SPEAKER_01: Um, definitely, you know, reinforce the idea that it's not a good idea to take meth.
• 1:01:55
  SPEAKER_01: Um, I think you know, food poisoning is real, and I think it's something that Vale might need to really truly start considering.
• 1:02:03
  SPEAKER_03: Uh yeah, right.
• 1:02:04
  SPEAKER_03: I don't drink cow blood like you do, so there's a difference.
• 1:02:07
  SPEAKER_07: Well, that I mean, Vale, if you came up to me and said, here's my bowl of pancake batter, I dare you to take a giant ladle, scoop it out, and just eat it raw.
• 1:02:17
  SPEAKER_07: You know what I'm gonna do.
• 1:02:18
  SPEAKER_03: First of all, pancake batter is not gonna make you sick.
• 1:02:21
  SPEAKER_07: I know I've eaten it before.
• 1:02:22
  SPEAKER_03: Yeah, especially the pancake batter I use, which is one of those uh box ones that is just pour water in here.
• 1:02:32
  SPEAKER_03: I don't have to make egg and all this other stuff in there.
• 1:02:34
  SPEAKER_03: It's pour water in here.
• 1:02:36
  SPEAKER_07: It's water and mixed raw, raw eggs are good for your training regimen, so it's not gonna hurt you if you put raw eggs in your batter.
• 1:02:42
  SPEAKER_03: I I watch Rocky drink raw eggs every morning before he ran.
• 1:02:46
  SPEAKER_03: I saw his training regimen.
• 1:02:48
  SPEAKER_07: And then he got his ass whooped by the Russians, so you better have more eggs.
• 1:02:51
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:02:53
  SPEAKER_04: No, he didn't.
• 1:02:54
  SPEAKER_04: He beat the Russian.
• 1:02:55
  SPEAKER_07: Not the was he beating the thing.
• 1:02:57
  SPEAKER_07: You fight him twice or just once?
• 1:02:59
  SPEAKER_07: Who's the guy who fought?
• 1:03:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, Paladin.
• 1:03:03
  SPEAKER_07: Right.
• 1:03:03
  SPEAKER_04: And then uh he club or lang beat his ass the first time.
• 1:03:07
  SPEAKER_07: Oh, whooped his ass.
• 1:03:09
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah.
• 1:03:10
  SPEAKER_04: But he didn't eat enough raw eggs.
• 1:03:12
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah, he didn't get enough raw eggs in his pancake bag.
• 1:03:14
  SPEAKER_07: And gloopy pancakes.
• 1:03:16
  SPEAKER_07: Yeah.
• 1:03:16
  SPEAKER_03: See what happened?
• 1:03:18
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, again, I I feel I feel like I learned some things, but yet I'm walking away slightly dumber than when we started.
• 1:03:27
  SPEAKER_01: So a success.
• 1:03:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 1:03:30
  SPEAKER_01: Yep.
• 1:03:31
  SPEAKER_01: So thanks for thanks again for uh for having me.
• 1:03:34
  SPEAKER_01: I I really appreciate that.
• 1:03:36
  SPEAKER_01: You know, your your quarterly review is now concluded.
• 1:03:39
  SPEAKER_07: Um our stockholders will be happy to know.
• 1:03:44
  SPEAKER_01: Yeah, I I really appreciate having another three months of truly questionable decisions to investigate and and talk about.
• 1:03:52
  SPEAKER_01: So all right.
• 1:03:53
  SPEAKER_07: Well, Todd, there you go.
• 1:03:54
  SPEAKER_07: You're you you you are the sole cause of the zombie apocalypse.
• 1:03:57
  SPEAKER_07: Is there anything else you want to say before we wrap this episode up?
• 1:04:00
  SPEAKER_04: Yeah, that was a that was a good good lightning round.
• 1:04:03
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you, the Duchess, for coming on.
• 1:04:06
  SPEAKER_04: We really appreciate it.
• 1:04:07
  SPEAKER_04: You did a great job.
• 1:04:08
  SPEAKER_04: Thank you.
• 1:04:09
  SPEAKER_04: Adios, the Todd is gone.
• 1:04:12
  SPEAKER_07: All right, Val close it out and remind everybody of our new ways to reach out and stay up to date with Doug Down.
• 1:04:19
  SPEAKER_03: All right, Duchess, thanks for jumping on.
• 1:04:22
  SPEAKER_03: It's always fun to uh answer questions from everybody, you know, and always um good good review of uh some of our past podcasts that we uh have had.
• 1:04:33
  SPEAKER_03: Um, so thank you for that.
• 1:04:35
  SPEAKER_03: Listener.
• 1:04:36
  SPEAKER_03: Oh, by the way, Lummox, I forgot to tell you.
• 1:04:38
  SPEAKER_03: Driving with my wife down the highway yesterday, you would have been proud because some for some reason yesterday we had the slowest drivers in the fast lane, and she was on every one of them.
• 1:04:50
  SPEAKER_03: She would drive by, stare them down.
• 1:04:52
  SPEAKER_03: I was like, Oh, you give them the old Lummox luck.
• 1:04:55
  SPEAKER_03: Why?
• 1:04:55
  SPEAKER_03: And she just kept yelling, why would you be in this lane?
• 1:04:58
  SPEAKER_03: Why are you here?
• 1:05:00
  SPEAKER_03: What makes you think that you should be in this lane?
• 1:05:03
  SPEAKER_03: I love it.
• 1:05:05
  SPEAKER_03: I I should have I should have just videoed it, you know, I should have taped some of it on my phone to video it to you.
• 1:05:10
  SPEAKER_03: Uh you would have loved that.
• 1:05:13
  SPEAKER_07: I'll give you one.
• 1:05:14
  SPEAKER_07: I'll give you one.
• 1:05:14
  SPEAKER_07: I was on the beach today.
• 1:05:17
  SPEAKER_07: Set up bright and early.
• 1:05:20
  SPEAKER_07: Front row.
• 1:05:22
  SPEAKER_07: And guess what happened?
• 1:05:24
  SPEAKER_07: By about noonish, you know, that that that mid-afternoon wave of people that thought they were gonna come down to the beach and get a prime spot.
• 1:05:34
  SPEAKER_07: Set up, I could I could smell their lack of deodorant.
• 1:05:37
  SPEAKER_07: That's how close they were.
• 1:05:40
  SPEAKER_07: Just squeezing in there.
• 1:05:41
  SPEAKER_07: Just oh, there's an empty spot between your two seats.
• 1:05:44
  SPEAKER_07: Let me put my tent here.
• 1:05:48
  SPEAKER_03: Uh that's what they do.
• 1:05:50
  SPEAKER_03: So, all right.
• 1:05:51
  SPEAKER_03: Well, donation, thanks again for uh jumping on.
• 1:05:54
  SPEAKER_03: Again, you can hit us up or on TikTok.
• 1:05:58
  SPEAKER_03: We uh have uh our website up, duh down.com.
• 1:06:02
  SPEAKER_03: You can you know uh see ever view everything from there, uh, read about a little bit about us, uh get a hold of us uh through there.
• 1:06:11
  SPEAKER_03: Also, we are on YouTube as well.
• 1:06:14
  SPEAKER_03: I know we've had a lot of people jump on YouTube and uh view some of the uh podcasts.
• 1:06:20
  SPEAKER_03: Uh feel free, please subscribe.
• 1:06:23
  SPEAKER_03: You can leave comments.
• 1:06:24
  SPEAKER_03: Uh, we always like to uh read those.
• 1:06:27
  SPEAKER_03: We would very much appreciate it.
• 1:06:29
  SPEAKER_03: Uh and we will be back with some more more stuff next week.
• 1:06:33
  SPEAKER_03: Donation, we are out.