Latest / The Family Teams Podcast / Ep. 122 | The Loneliest Generation

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Ep. 122 | The Loneliest Generation · The Family Teams Podcast

• 0:00
  What's up, 5-Minute Fatherhood listeners? Have you guys seen that Family Team's Weekend Live is officially open? You can register. You can claim your spot. A two-day event, Cincinnati, Ohio, October 18th and 19th this year. We're going to pack 250 couples in a Memorial Hall historic theater downtown where we're going to lean in, roll up our sleeves, and we're going to be able to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a chance to get a
• 0:20
  and have a workshop about building a multi-generational family team on mission. You're going to get practical tips. You're going to get practical tools. You're going to leave with a family blueprint and manual. And officially, you're also going to be not alone and realize there's other people who want to do the same thing as you. We want you guys there. It's selling out fast. So make sure to go to familyteams.com slash weekend to register and claim your spot. And there's also a special little discount code if you're part of our Facebook group, which you can find a link to that.
• 0:48
  in the info section on audio or the info section on the YouTube channel. So again, familyteams.com slash weekend. It's selling out fast. Claim your spot. We'd love to see you there. True freedom actually always inherently has true restraint.
• 1:10
  Hey guys, welcome to the 5-Minute Fatherhood Podcast. I'm your co-host, Jeff Bethke, along with my friend and mentor, Jeremy Pryor. Join us Monday through Friday as we chat about quick tips, skills, and ways to help equip you on your journey as a father to build your multi-generational family team on mission. Stay tuned.
• 1:31
  What's up, guys? Welcome to another 5-Minute Fatherhood. We are living in a culture that is so incredibly lonely, and it's happening at a rate that is really different than probably any other time in history. And a lot of people are asking the question, why is that?
• 1:47
  Why in a society when we have more freedom of choice than we've ever had in history, our people seem to be more lonely than ever? And really, these things are related. This obsession with freedom of choice and the loneliness that we feel. And a lot of this implicates the family. And I was blown away.
• 2:05
  I'm curious what your reaction is to this, Jeff. I was reading an article by a Missouri senator named Josh Hawley, and he said we're living in what he's calling the age of Pelagius. This is kind of a weird word, but Pelagius is the name of a guy from Rome who was a monk, and he started a heresy or a belief system that was really anti-biblical.
• 2:28
  And it's fascinating what Josh said about this guy and how we're kind of living in his legacy. He says, For decades now, our politics and culture have been dominated by a particular philosophy of freedom. It is a philosophy of liberation from family and tradition, of escape from God and community, a philosophy of self-creation, an unrestricted, unfettered free choice. It is a philosophy that has defined our age.
• 2:54
  though it is far from new. In fact, its most influential proponent lived 1,700 years ago, a British monk who eventually settled in Rome named Pelagius. So thoroughly has his teaching informed our recent past and precipitated our present crisis that we might refer to this era as the age of Pelagius. And the...
• 3:15
  He said that the sort of spirit of the age was really summed up well in a decision made by the Supreme Court. It was in Casey v. Planned Parenthood. Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote in his decision, At the heart of liberty is the right to define one's own concept of existence, of meaning, of the universe, and of the mystery of human life.
• 3:38
  So this is what the senator then wrote after that. The Pelagian view says the individual is most free when he is most alone, able to choose his own way without interference. Family, tradition, neighborhood, and church, these things get in the way of uninhibited free choice, and this Pelagian idea of freedom is one our cultural leaders have embraced for decades. Okay.
• 4:05
  And so one of the questions that I want to kind of push or pose for you guys as dads is, man, have you embraced this idea of freedom? That you are most free when you're most alone, when things are not impinging on your free choice, right? If that's your idea of freedom, you guys, then...
• 4:24
  family's always going to feel like an obstacle to freedom. And because this definition of freedom is almost the highest value now in our culture, then family will feel like a direct opposition to what your goals are or what it would look like for you to live a meaningful life. But of course, you guys, in the gospel, freedom is not an unfettered choice, right? Freedom is the
• 4:44
  the essence of our slavery is something going on internally. It's the things that are happening, the impulses in our flesh, the things that are driving us towards legalistic religion. These elements of the flesh are the things that enslave us, and that freedom looks like actually coming out of self-centeredness and into other-centeredness, which would mean fatherhood is actually the path into freedom. And so this is why the definition is so important. If you have a Pelagian view of freedom, then fatherhood and family is going to be
• 5:11
  the thing that's going to stand between you and what you ultimately want to have or achieve in life, if this is your cultural value. But if you really believe the gospel and understand that what freedom is, is to be freedom from the slavery to sin, then fatherhood is a pathway into freedom. And so I just thought this was a really interesting thing that he was sort of teasing out in public in this article that kind of went viral, and I wanted to get your thoughts on this, Jeff.
• 5:34
  Yeah, I mean, I agree. One last thought I'll give is that's interesting is, yeah, I think this is the absolute air we breathe, the water we're swimming in as a culture. And I think this is like, actually we're actually living the logical conclusion, even if even like the founding fathers, like you go back to enlightenment, you go back to the French revolution, obviously, which wasn't our revolution, but just same era. And you go back to some similar things of the time, philosophers, like this was exactly what everyone wanted and where everyone was going of the individual autonomy and the individual freedom is the highest ideal. And if we make that so,
• 6:03
  what will that look like? Now that gives an immense amount of benefits with individual rights, with democracy, et cetera. But now we're living on kind of the back end of that, which doesn't show itself well. One kind of metaphor I'll use that's really helpful to me is, yeah, it's exactly what you said of like, it's, you know, if you actually buy this view of freedom, especially as a father, then you'll actually think family stands in your way from having, you know, your best life and your hobbies and that nice car and all these kind of weird pseudo dreams a lot of fathers have or whatever. When instead, freedom,
• 6:30
  True freedom actually always inherently has true restraint. So true freedom is not just completely uninhibited. That's like a false pseudo freedom, just like skydiving, right? So skydiving would be seen as a cultural example of one of the biggest, best moments of true uninhibited freedom, right? Like that's just the moment you're most free, jumping out of a plane and just plummeting to the earth. That's seen as like, you know, people who are crazy, you know, have no inhibitions and are free, something they do. But yet...
• 6:59
  For you to still be that free, you're wearing a restraint called a parachute, right? If you were to not even wear the restraint, then what would happen? It wouldn't be true freedom. It would be called death, right? But that would actually technically make you even more free though, right? To the feeling and whatever and the risk and all that stuff. But true freedom inherently has risk. And when there, I mean, not risk, restraint. And when there is a form of restraint, like there is the parachute in skydiving, then you actually can enjoy the freedom more.
• 7:28
  then you actually can use the freedom. Then you can actually be within the bounds of the freedom. And like you said, it's freedom from sin. And then I would also say freedom to serve. Like, we're freed up to do something. That's the whole point, right? Like, when you're free, you're freed up to do something. And that's not to just kind of indulge or bloat yourself or, you know, chase some hedonistic dream, but to actually free to love God and love neighbor, which the scriptures say is the ultimate ideal and the thing that'll actually give us, kind of call us back to our own genuine humanness. So,
• 7:58
  Yeah, guys, think about that today. Be challenged with that today is what view would you put yourself in? Have you bought the American line, the American dream of freedom? Or have you understood and lived in the more biblical view of what freedom is? And remember, you guys, that the end of this story that Jeff and I are talking about is to be alone. Right.
• 8:15
  The end of this idea is to die alone. And God does not want that for us. And so we either die to ourselves or we're going to die alone. And so we need to die to ourselves. And you guys who are struggling with young families and all the challenges that are invested into that season, it's really good for you. It's really good for your future. It's not easy, but it's worth it.
• 8:40
  Hey guys, one of our favorite places to hang out on is the family team's Instagram. That is where you will find tips, quotes, tricks, and a bunch of other conversational things to help you build your family team on mission. If you're on Instagram and you want to get encouragement as you do this and build your family team, just head over to Instagram and follow us at familyteams.com.