Latest / Do You F*cking Mind? / 367. How finding your passion can lead to greater self love and how to find it in the first place

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367. How finding your passion can lead to greater self love and how to find it in the first place · Do You F*cking Mind?

0:12
Speaker 1: Hello, beautiful people, and welcome to today's episode. So in
0:16
Speaker 1: today's episode, we are doing the whole topic about passion,
0:20
Speaker 1: finding your passion, rediscovering a passion, how to know when
0:24
Speaker 1: something is your passion, everything around that. I did a
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Speaker 1: little question box on my Instagram. I got so many
0:29
Speaker 1: great questions come through, and I also had a lot
0:32
Speaker 1: of repeat or kind of like themed questions that a
0:36
Speaker 1: lot of people were asking, which is great for me.
0:39
Speaker 1: When I get a lot of the same questions coming through,
0:41
Speaker 1: it means that I'm on the right track with a
0:43
Speaker 1: topic because it means obviously a lot of people are
0:45
Speaker 1: feeling that way or experiencing that thing, and what I
0:48
Speaker 1: speak about on this episode will hopefully reach a lot
0:50
Speaker 1: of people. So we're going to get straight into the
0:54
Speaker 1: episode of passion. I'm going to be talking about points
0:58
Speaker 1: on how to perceive what passion should look like for you,
1:02
Speaker 1: what it is not, if it can change, if you
1:06
Speaker 1: can have more than one all of those things, and
1:08
Speaker 1: then at the end of the episode, I'm going to
1:10
Speaker 1: go through and answer specifically your questions. Now, you might
1:13
Speaker 1: find that some of those questions have already been answered
1:15
Speaker 1: within the episode, but I'll give more specific answers as well. Okay,
1:19
Speaker 1: so good times. Do we have a life update? I mean,
1:23
Speaker 1: I've always got a left update, but yes, I went
1:25
Speaker 1: to Noosa last week. So I grew up in NUSA.
1:30
Speaker 1: I went to Sunshine Beach State High Iconic, and I
1:35
Speaker 1: went back with my high school bestie, Renee, and we
1:40
Speaker 1: did a very short and sweet talk at our high
1:44
Speaker 1: school dance night. It was wild just being there, being
1:48
Speaker 1: at the dance stage where we danced so many times,
1:51
Speaker 1: like I had multiple subjects, even in that building, the
1:54
Speaker 1: performing Arts block for those of you that go to
1:56
Speaker 1: Sunshine Beach State High. It was so fucking cool and
2:00
Speaker 1: and I graduated in two thousand and six, and I
2:04
Speaker 1: started on the cheerleading squad in two thousand and four,
2:08
Speaker 1: and that was the first year that our high school
2:09
Speaker 1: ever had a cheerleading squad because it was the first
2:11
Speaker 1: year that Grier Stockton, our teacher, came to the school.
2:14
Speaker 1: And I was on the og Sanschai Beach Stayed High Superstars,
2:20
Speaker 1: and it was just so cool to see the cheerleading squad.
2:23
Speaker 1: They're performing and now they do things like lyrical and contemporary,
2:27
Speaker 1: like they do more than just cheering and not just
2:30
Speaker 1: in like the cheerleader outfit they do other outfit. It
2:32
Speaker 1: was just yeah, the evolution is world anyway. For those
2:35
Speaker 1: of you that don't give a fuck about dance, they
2:37
Speaker 1: wouldn't care. But it was amazing and just really cool
2:40
Speaker 1: to be able to go back and talk at the
2:43
Speaker 1: school anyway. That was my LAFE update. It was incredible.
2:46
Speaker 1: It's good times. If you need me to talk at
2:48
Speaker 1: your school, just fucking I'll be like, Hey, it's also
2:51
Speaker 1: hard not to swear, so keep that in mind if
2:55
Speaker 1: you ever want to book me for a fucking talk
2:56
Speaker 1: at a school. All right, let's get straight into the
3:00
Speaker 1: fucking passion episode of today. Hello, my beautiful beings. Whether
3:19
Speaker 1: you're a longtime listener to this podcast or tuning in
3:21
Speaker 1: for the first time, I hope you'll check out my
3:24
Speaker 1: new audio book, How to Chase Change Thirty Days to
3:27
Speaker 1: Master your Mindset. It's an actionable, step by step, thirty
3:32
Speaker 1: day guide to teach you how to shift your mindset
3:34
Speaker 1: and create the change you want to see in your life,
3:37
Speaker 1: from physical and mental health to your relationships, career, self confidence,
3:42
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3:46
Speaker 1: audiobooks are sold. Start listening today. So the first thing,
3:52
Speaker 1: and this is something I'm going to go through multiple
3:54
Speaker 1: points as I always do, but the first thing that
3:56
Speaker 1: I want to talk about when it comes to this
3:58
Speaker 1: whole idea of passion and whatever is that I think
4:02
Speaker 1: a lot of people think that we need to identify
4:05
Speaker 1: what our passion is and then invest the time, the energy,
4:11
Speaker 1: the whatever. And this is a problem that I think
4:13
Speaker 1: that including myself, a lot of us have, if not
4:16
Speaker 1: most of us have. We think that I need to
4:19
Speaker 1: know that something is for sure before I am willing
4:22
Speaker 1: to invest, and this has caused people to be lackluster,
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Speaker 1: not just with passion but with careers and massively with relationships.
4:31
Speaker 1: We are so no, you need to be the sure
4:34
Speaker 1: thing before I give an inch. We don't want to
4:37
Speaker 1: invest a fucking thing until we know it's a sure thing.
4:41
Speaker 1: But ironically, there's no way of knowing if that is
4:44
Speaker 1: a sure thing or if it's going to be worth
4:45
Speaker 1: it unless we invest. It's this cost versus reward, versus
4:51
Speaker 1: risk analysis and all that shit. Okay, so the same
4:55
Speaker 1: you know, when you look at a relationship, this is
4:57
Speaker 1: the issue where most people in the dating scene, or
5:00
Speaker 1: when you are on the receiving end, of that, you
5:02
Speaker 1: can probably relate to what I'm saying, where a lot
5:05
Speaker 1: of people they just they have their fingers in a
5:07
Speaker 1: thousand pies that don't really want to commit to anything
5:10
Speaker 1: because they're like, why am I going to invest all
5:13
Speaker 1: this time and energy when I barely know you and
5:15
Speaker 1: there's all this other potential potential people, potential dates, potential
5:19
Speaker 1: relationships around me. I could be cutting myself off. I
5:21
Speaker 1: could be like selling myself short investing in this one
5:24
Speaker 1: relationship when I could be doing We think the same
5:27
Speaker 1: about Korea, and we think the same about our passions.
5:29
Speaker 1: It's like, well, why am I going to invest all
5:31
Speaker 1: this time and energy? And when I don't, I'm not
5:35
Speaker 1: that passionate about it. I don't really like it, okay.
5:38
Speaker 1: And then the problem with that, of course, is that
5:40
Speaker 1: you're always going to be sitting in this potential and
5:43
Speaker 1: potential is this it's kind of like this. It feels
5:48
Speaker 1: good because there's so much that could happen, but unutilized
5:52
Speaker 1: potential is basically you just wasting away. Okay. So I
5:56
Speaker 1: want you to really get clear on the idea as
5:59
Speaker 1: we talk through everything in this episode, that there is
6:03
Speaker 1: no point and no need to think I need to
6:06
Speaker 1: know what that passion is before I start investing my
6:11
Speaker 1: time and energy into it, because that only happens for
6:13
Speaker 1: a very select few people, very very very select few.
6:17
Speaker 1: For most people, the reason they discover their passion is
6:20
Speaker 1: because they started doing it, either because someone invited them
6:23
Speaker 1: to do it, or because their work led them to
6:25
Speaker 1: do something else, or because of XYZ whatever. But they
6:28
Speaker 1: kind of fell into it, and through doing time effort,
6:31
Speaker 1: they realized, wow, this is actually, this is actually really
6:34
Speaker 1: fucking interesting I And then before they know it, they're proactively,
6:39
Speaker 1: you know, engaging in that thing, and then it becomes
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Speaker 1: their passion. Okay, so don't think about it. I have
6:44
Speaker 1: to identify my passion before I start, because that is
6:47
Speaker 1: you saying I refuse to put in effort on something
6:50
Speaker 1: that might may or may not reape rewards. You have
6:55
Speaker 1: to put in the effort, even if you think this
6:57
Speaker 1: is fruitless. I got nothing out of it. You always
7:00
Speaker 1: get something out of it. You could go down a
7:02
Speaker 1: path thinking this might be something I could be passionate
7:04
Speaker 1: and be like, actually, no, it's not. You've gained a skill,
7:07
Speaker 1: you've done something with your time, you've invested energy, you've
7:10
Speaker 1: used your brain. You've probably met people a long the way.
7:12
Speaker 1: It's never a waste. Okay, So you need to give
7:16
Speaker 1: effort wherever possible. And also effort is not some tap
7:19
Speaker 1: like some capped I was gonna say tapped, but also
7:23
Speaker 1: tapped some capped resource that we have. You can as
7:27
Speaker 1: long as it's willful effort, you can be putting in.
7:31
Speaker 1: You should be putting in effort left, right and center.
7:33
Speaker 1: What else are you fucking going to do with your time?
7:35
Speaker 1: Look back when you're eating and be like, Lol, there's
7:38
Speaker 1: all the shit that I could have done, But I
7:39
Speaker 1: was like, no, it's not really slapping me in the
7:41
Speaker 1: face with excitement, So I'm not going to do it.
7:43
Speaker 1: Put in effort wherever you can, wherever you can be bothered,
7:46
Speaker 1: wherever you can see fit. Just put in the fucking effort,
7:49
Speaker 1: because like attracts, Like the more effort you put, the
7:52
Speaker 1: more you're going to reap and return. The people that
7:55
Speaker 1: I know that are kind of like, I've never really
7:56
Speaker 1: found my passion. I've never this, I've never that. I've
7:58
Speaker 1: never They've always had a desire, but it's not through
8:01
Speaker 1: a lack of desire, but they've never gone out there
8:03
Speaker 1: and done shit that they're slightly interested in. You've got
8:06
Speaker 1: to do shit that you are slightly interested in, and
8:11
Speaker 1: that's where you find the things that you're really fucking
8:13
Speaker 1: interested in. And I'm the prime example of that, the
8:16
Speaker 1: prime example. I am living and breathing and working in
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Speaker 1: my passion, which is something that I absolutely do not
8:24
Speaker 1: say you have to do. It's sometimes better not to
8:26
Speaker 1: work in your passion because it makes it a bit easier.
8:28
Speaker 1: But I'm someone that's doing all of the above, and
8:31
Speaker 1: I kind of just fell into it because I thought
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Speaker 1: I'll give this a go, I'll try that. Oh why not?
8:35
Speaker 1: Why not? Why not? And then I ended up somewhere
8:37
Speaker 1: where I really liked it. I wasn't sitting sitting down
8:39
Speaker 1: watching TV and saw a documentary and I think that
8:42
Speaker 1: is my passion. Neuroscience is my passion. That's not how
8:44
Speaker 1: it happened to me. So that's the first thing. The
8:47
Speaker 1: second thing is you need to decide to be open
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Speaker 1: to exploring things and be open to random things being
8:55
Speaker 1: your passion. Don't be judgmental on what your passion is,
8:59
Speaker 1: because the point for passion is to serve you, to
9:04
Speaker 1: improve your mental health, to increase your confidence, to increase
9:07
Speaker 1: your self esteem. It's not so it looks good to
9:10
Speaker 1: other people around you. Your passion could be the most
9:13
Speaker 1: fucking random thing in the world. But passion to follow
9:17
Speaker 1: something that you are interested in, where you want to
9:20
Speaker 1: put effort, where you want to commit that is one
9:23
Speaker 1: of the best things you can do for your relationship
9:26
Speaker 1: with yourself. Okay, So don't get tied up on that.
9:29
Speaker 1: I also want it to be cool, or I want
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Speaker 1: it to be impressive to other people or what. No,
9:33
Speaker 1: you have to be able to let go of that,
9:35
Speaker 1: because you could be sitting here right now twisting your
9:38
Speaker 1: brain into a knot trying to figure out what is
9:41
Speaker 1: something that looks cool makes me look you know, appealing
9:44
Speaker 1: is like other people are in prayers, all these things.
9:46
Speaker 1: Plus I really like it, Plus it's achievable for me
9:49
Speaker 1: to even do it, plus plus plus plus you're literally limiting, limiting, limiting, limiting, limiting.
9:54
Speaker 1: Just be open to the fact that your passion could
9:57
Speaker 1: be something that's simple, random as fuck, and probably maybe
10:01
Speaker 1: maybe other people either don't understand it or they think
10:04
Speaker 1: it's weird. Okay, because remind yourself the point of a
10:09
Speaker 1: passion is not to impress people. It's not to add
10:12
Speaker 1: to my identity, so more people will want to be
10:14
Speaker 1: my friend. No, it's not the point of a passion
10:17
Speaker 1: is to improve your relationship with yourself. And you could
10:21
Speaker 1: be passionate about bird watching, you could be passionate about puzzles.
10:26
Speaker 1: And the people that are out there pursuing these so
10:28
Speaker 1: called random passions, I can guarantee you right now, they
10:31
Speaker 1: feel fulfilled, they get excited, they have something to wake
10:35
Speaker 1: up for, they look forward to things. It just enriches
10:37
Speaker 1: their life, no matter how weird it appears from the outside. Okay,
10:41
Speaker 1: get rid of that idea and you will already feel
10:44
Speaker 1: so much lighter and instantly the idea for what your
10:48
Speaker 1: passion is or passions, because I'm going to talk about
10:50
Speaker 1: multiple passions in a second, will your horizon will fucking broaden,
10:54
Speaker 1: not even overnight, over a second. Okay. The third thing
11:00
Speaker 1: that is so so so important is that you have
11:05
Speaker 1: to be willing to put in effort, work, and effort. Okay,
11:14
Speaker 1: And I also want you to acknowledge that most passions
11:17
Speaker 1: are going to require hard work and an uncomfortable period.
11:20
Speaker 1: Now this is not me saying go find that thing
11:23
Speaker 1: that you detest and make yourself fucking like it. Because
11:26
Speaker 1: it's a fucking attitude change. That's not what I'm saying.
11:28
Speaker 1: I'm saying find something that you're remotely interested and you're like,
11:31
Speaker 1: oh yeah, that maybe, uh, but it doesn't whatever. Find
11:35
Speaker 1: that thing okay, and then put in the effort. And
11:37
Speaker 1: the reason I say this is because a lot of
11:38
Speaker 1: the time, especially if it's something that's that revolves around
11:41
Speaker 1: skill or doing something, it requires you to go through
11:45
Speaker 1: a period where you're shit at it, where you're not
11:48
Speaker 1: very good at it, and not being good at something
11:52
Speaker 1: for the most part, is not really that exciting, it's
11:55
Speaker 1: not that fulfilling. So you've got to be able to
11:58
Speaker 1: go through the initial stages and just be the first
12:00
Speaker 1: couple of times you do it. It can still be fun,
12:02
Speaker 1: but you might not be passionate about it because they're like,
12:04
Speaker 1: I'm pretty shit of this thing. But it requires the
12:07
Speaker 1: effort involved to be like, I'm gonna see it through
12:10
Speaker 1: for at least a few sessions. That's why it's good
12:14
Speaker 1: that when you try something, you do at least a
12:16
Speaker 1: semester or you do you know, at least a ten
12:18
Speaker 1: week course on that thing. You don't just do the
12:20
Speaker 1: one session, because you might do the one session and
12:22
Speaker 1: be like lame shit, I was a dud, I was whatever,
12:25
Speaker 1: and then you're never gonna go there again. Okay. It's
12:28
Speaker 1: like a lot of people say, you know, it's not
12:29
Speaker 1: like you go try surfing once and say, oh, I
12:31
Speaker 1: can't surf. I can't. Fuck no shit can't. Of course
12:34
Speaker 1: you can't surf. You've done at once. Okay, But if
12:36
Speaker 1: you were to do it a hundred times, how would
12:38
Speaker 1: that change? How would your language around that change? You'd
12:39
Speaker 1: probably fucking like it, and you'd probably be really good
12:41
Speaker 1: at it, and you'd probably be able to teach other
12:43
Speaker 1: people who have never done it something about the skill
12:46
Speaker 1: of surfing. Okay, So I think you really need to
12:48
Speaker 1: be like I have to be willing to put in effort.
12:51
Speaker 1: It's going to cost me time, it's gonna cost me effort,
12:55
Speaker 1: and it's going to also potentially be trial and error
12:59
Speaker 1: in that sense. So I'm going to do this pottery
13:01
Speaker 1: class and yeah, it was fun, I enjoyed it, but
13:04
Speaker 1: I'm not really I don't want to continue it. Great, Okay,
13:06
Speaker 1: there's time and effort gone. You gave it a go.
13:08
Speaker 1: It's no longer your pasion. You did it twenty times.
13:10
Speaker 1: You move on to the next thing. That's what it takes. Okay,
13:13
Speaker 1: always remind yourself effort first. You know, like a lot
13:17
Speaker 1: of people think, oh, it should be effortless. It should
13:19
Speaker 1: just slap you in the face. It should be this,
13:21
Speaker 1: it should be there, it shouldn't be horrible. I agree
13:24
Speaker 1: with that, but I also think this idea of like, oh,
13:26
Speaker 1: if you work in your passion or if you work
13:29
Speaker 1: in your purpose, if you do what you love, you
13:31
Speaker 1: never work a day in your life. Bullshit, you're still working.
13:34
Speaker 1: It's nothing wrong with working, but you have to acknowledge
13:36
Speaker 1: what work is, even if you love it. And I
13:39
Speaker 1: think it's important to acknowledge that as well, so you
13:41
Speaker 1: can also obviously rest because then if you say, oh,
13:43
Speaker 1: but you never work a day in your life, if
13:46
Speaker 1: you love what you do, then you feel like it's
13:47
Speaker 1: someone that has to work fucking twenty hours a day
13:50
Speaker 1: on your business, which is bullshit. Work is work, Okay.
13:53
Speaker 1: Effort is effort, and I think it's important that we
13:55
Speaker 1: acknowledge the effort that is required and we are willing.
13:59
Speaker 1: We're willing to show for the task. Okay, so effort.
14:02
Speaker 1: The fourth thing is try things out before you say
14:08
Speaker 1: that they are your passion or not. Okay, you've got
14:11
Speaker 1: there's a lot of trial and error. There's a numbers game.
14:13
Speaker 1: Most of the questions that came through or people saying,
14:16
Speaker 1: I've tried this, I've tried that, I've tried that, but
14:18
Speaker 1: nothing is really my passion. That's fine, and you're doing
14:21
Speaker 1: the right thing and you're on the right path. But
14:23
Speaker 1: firstly you've got to ask yourself, how are you trying
14:26
Speaker 1: these things? What does it look like? You know? Is
14:29
Speaker 1: it me attending a class and then going home and
14:31
Speaker 1: not doing anything else about it? Is it me like
14:33
Speaker 1: is it me being dragged along by someone but I
14:35
Speaker 1: didn't have the initiative to go. Is it actually an interest?
14:38
Speaker 1: Is it? You've got to ask yourself all these questions
14:41
Speaker 1: around how are you trying this thing? But you are
14:43
Speaker 1: on the right path in the sense that it is
14:45
Speaker 1: a numbers game and you have to try many different things.
14:49
Speaker 1: Just like dating for a lot of people is going
14:51
Speaker 1: to be a numbers game. You've got to date multiple people,
14:53
Speaker 1: you know, living in certain things, or finding the right job.
14:55
Speaker 1: It's all about a numbers game. Okay. The next thing,
14:59
Speaker 1: and this is really important, it has to come from you.
15:02
Speaker 1: You have to have the initiative to do it. So
15:04
Speaker 1: a lot of people might think, yeah, but I've been
15:07
Speaker 1: doing this thing with my partner, I've been going and
15:09
Speaker 1: doing this thing with my friends, or I've been whatever.
15:11
Speaker 1: But if you notice that after you do that thing,
15:15
Speaker 1: you come home and you have no interest to go
15:17
Speaker 1: and do it on your own, to want to practice it,
15:20
Speaker 1: to want to read up on it, learn about other
15:23
Speaker 1: aspects of that thing, whatever it is, to then go
15:26
Speaker 1: and do a session on your own of whatever it is,
15:28
Speaker 1: or a sport or whatever. If the only time you
15:31
Speaker 1: do that thing is when it's more like a social
15:34
Speaker 1: thing with your partner, with your friends, when it's at school,
15:36
Speaker 1: when it's whatever, then that problem and if you kind
15:39
Speaker 1: of enjoy it, then that's a hobby, okay, or like
15:43
Speaker 1: a very like surface level hobby okay. Initiative is one
15:48
Speaker 1: of the key things for you to understand what is
15:50
Speaker 1: a passion. I have to be willing to take initiative.
15:54
Speaker 1: I've got to be willing to either go and do
15:55
Speaker 1: it on my own when no one else brings it up,
15:58
Speaker 1: or be the one that invites someone to with me
16:00
Speaker 1: to do it. I have to take charge and be
16:03
Speaker 1: in control and not passively engage in this thing. If
16:06
Speaker 1: the only time you ever do it is because your
16:09
Speaker 1: friend has invited you to do it, then that is
16:11
Speaker 1: not you taking the initiative. You can still be something
16:13
Speaker 1: that you do and it can still be enjoyed, but
16:15
Speaker 1: it's likely not going to be your passion. And if
16:18
Speaker 1: you're on the edge being like, but I do enjoy it,
16:22
Speaker 1: then give yourself a one month or a three month experiment. Think, Okay,
16:27
Speaker 1: I've started doing this thing with my friend. I enjoy it,
16:30
Speaker 1: but every time she doesn't invite me, I just don't
16:32
Speaker 1: bother doing it. What would it look like if I
16:34
Speaker 1: decided to take initiative and take the reins a bit more.
16:38
Speaker 1: What if I tried to research it more? What if
16:39
Speaker 1: I try to do this? What if I try to
16:41
Speaker 1: do that? What if I try to do this? Give
16:43
Speaker 1: it a month, give it three months, and see if
16:45
Speaker 1: that sparks a passion because you've gotten better at it. Okay,
16:49
Speaker 1: Now the next thing is that it has to be
16:54
Speaker 1: active and not passive. Now, what I mean by that
16:58
Speaker 1: is most addictive things that we engage would fall into
17:01
Speaker 1: the passive category. Consuming content on your phone that's passive,
17:05
Speaker 1: Consuming drugs that's passive, alcohol, passive, you're just kind of consuming,
17:10
Speaker 1: but it's not really requiring significant amounts of effort. Okay, gambling,
17:16
Speaker 1: that's all relatively passive in the way that you're engaging
17:18
Speaker 1: with it. Okay. Active engagement in something requires effort, It
17:23
Speaker 1: requires a level of work, It requires growth, It requires
17:27
Speaker 1: you pushing the parameters every time. Not because you're like
17:31
Speaker 1: competing with yourself or you're going to enter a competition,
17:33
Speaker 1: but you're getting better at it. You're getting better and
17:36
Speaker 1: better and better. And it is active. It is me,
17:38
Speaker 1: not just so. For example, if you are someone that
17:42
Speaker 1: let's say Formula one, okay you are, you could either
17:47
Speaker 1: be passively enjoying Formula one or you could be relatively
17:50
Speaker 1: active in it. And what do I mean by that.
17:52
Speaker 1: You could be someone that says, Formula one is my hobby.
17:54
Speaker 1: I love watching Formula one on the weekends, but I
17:57
Speaker 1: wouldn't call it my passion because I watch it and
18:00
Speaker 1: then until the next race is on, I'm not really
18:03
Speaker 1: doing anything else. Someone who's passionate about it is probably
18:06
Speaker 1: going to be doing research, maybe watching documentaries, seeking out
18:09
Speaker 1: more information, seeking out podcasts, listening to things. Maybe so
18:13
Speaker 1: you could still be within the realm of something that's
18:16
Speaker 1: passive consumption because you're not engaging formula one, you're not
18:19
Speaker 1: driving the car, but you're someone that then becomes someone
18:22
Speaker 1: that knows all this information, the history of formula one,
18:25
Speaker 1: you read books, you do this. That's active. You're seeking
18:27
Speaker 1: out information, you're putting in the effort, you're trying to
18:31
Speaker 1: broaden your knowledge and your horizon. And that's someone who
18:34
Speaker 1: can then say I am passionate about Formula one, and
18:36
Speaker 1: that can apply to any sport. Okay. So there's a
18:38
Speaker 1: difference between sitting there consuming it, but then once it's
18:41
Speaker 1: not in front of you, you're not actively engaging in
18:44
Speaker 1: consuming more, versus someone who's actively doing something about it.
18:49
Speaker 1: That is for me a really good way of determining
18:52
Speaker 1: what is a hobby and what is a passion. They're
18:53
Speaker 1: both great, they're both healthy, but one is one you
18:56
Speaker 1: are driven to do that thing. The other one is
18:59
Speaker 1: just a bit passive. Okay. So basically it begins with
19:02
Speaker 1: interest and that interest chipping away at putting in effort
19:06
Speaker 1: all of that. That is what turns into a passion.
19:09
Speaker 1: So what was once like a push to do something
19:11
Speaker 1: someone told you to do then becomes a pool. I
19:14
Speaker 1: am pooled. I am compelled to do that thing. Okay,
19:16
Speaker 1: push versus pool? Ask yourself, does it feel like, oh,
19:20
Speaker 1: I've got to do this thing or oh I'm excited
19:22
Speaker 1: that I get to do this thing. It starts as
19:25
Speaker 1: the ihah, Okay, I'm gonna do this thing, and then
19:28
Speaker 1: it ends up being like, can't wait un till I
19:29
Speaker 1: can do that thing again. I've got a spare moment,
19:31
Speaker 1: I've got a spare hour. What can I be doing
19:32
Speaker 1: towards this thing? Okay? Then ask yourself, am I wanting
19:35
Speaker 1: to grow in this domain? Like I said before about
19:38
Speaker 1: active versus passive? Are you seeing growth? Are you wanting
19:42
Speaker 1: to grow? Are you willing to grow? The next thing
19:44
Speaker 1: that you want to ask yourself these two questions you
19:46
Speaker 1: want to ask yourself, is am I compelled to explore?
19:49
Speaker 1: Even if it's not my passion yet? Am I compelled
19:51
Speaker 1: to explore? That's what happened to me with neuroscience. Okay,
19:54
Speaker 1: I was doing a Bachelor of Arts because I thought
19:56
Speaker 1: you would be fun. See this is again, this is
19:58
Speaker 1: the perfect example. I just thought UNI would be fun
20:01
Speaker 1: because I'm doing acting and I don't know when that's
20:04
Speaker 1: gonna pop off. So I'll just do UNI. My friends
20:07
Speaker 1: at UNI. That just looks like a good time. So
20:09
Speaker 1: that was the first thing. Now I'm in UNI, and
20:11
Speaker 1: I thought, well, I might as well just pick a
20:12
Speaker 1: bunch of random subjects. Psychology looks interesting. I wasn't passionate
20:16
Speaker 1: about psychology, not even course, but I'm like, that looks interesting.
20:19
Speaker 1: Chose that as one of my subjects. Then I had
20:21
Speaker 1: a lecture, So this is now the third thing. Then
20:23
Speaker 1: it was a lecturer that lectured about neuroscience. And that's
20:25
Speaker 1: when I thought, that's interesting. I'd be interested in knowing
20:28
Speaker 1: a little bit more. Was I saying, oh my god,
20:30
Speaker 1: this is my passion. Did I know that it would
20:33
Speaker 1: be really really hard to delve into that and like
20:36
Speaker 1: to learn about it. Yeah, of course, But I thought, no,
20:38
Speaker 1: I'm interested. So then I started being like, I'm compelled
20:41
Speaker 1: to explore more. So what became was like, mah mah, compelled. Okay,
20:47
Speaker 1: so you need to just put yourself in a position
20:51
Speaker 1: where you are likely to find your passion. If I'm
20:53
Speaker 1: at home every day, if I'm just consuming content on Instagram,
20:55
Speaker 1: where there's an algorithm that's geared to me about the
20:57
Speaker 1: same shit that I've been looking at every fucking day.
20:59
Speaker 1: So the algorith it gives you more at the same shit.
21:01
Speaker 1: Then what are the chances that I'm going to stumble
21:03
Speaker 1: across my passion? You actively stumble across it because you
21:06
Speaker 1: put yourself out there more, you will enroll into this thing.
21:09
Speaker 1: You say yes to that invitation, you decide to meet
21:11
Speaker 1: these people, you decide to go on that trip, and
21:13
Speaker 1: before you know it, just like I said, it's a
21:15
Speaker 1: numbers game, you are now exposed to more things that
21:18
Speaker 1: could pique your interest. Okay, so am I compelled to
21:22
Speaker 1: explore number one and two? Do I feel a sense
21:25
Speaker 1: of connection when I do this? Either with like minded individuals?
21:29
Speaker 1: Do you feel more connected with yourself? Do you feel
21:31
Speaker 1: more connected with like your culture or your family or
21:34
Speaker 1: is it something that you're like, oh, this is like
21:36
Speaker 1: soothing to my soul. I feel connected here or the earth,
21:39
Speaker 1: or to nature or to animals. But this idea of
21:42
Speaker 1: connection is why you keep coming back. If when you
21:45
Speaker 1: do that thing, you feel fulfilled connected. That's why a
21:50
Speaker 1: lot of people their passion has to do with animals
21:52
Speaker 1: or nature, because it's this deep sense of connection when
21:55
Speaker 1: they're there. It's not this surface level shit that's what
21:59
Speaker 1: keeps them coming back. Okay, So am I compelled to explore?
22:01
Speaker 1: Do I feel a sense of connection here? Those two
22:03
Speaker 1: questions are great when you're starting to explore things that
22:06
Speaker 1: you're interested in to become a passion. And then I
22:09
Speaker 1: want you to ask yourself, am I demonstrating a level
22:11
Speaker 1: of commitment here? Okay? So this is the difference between
22:16
Speaker 1: passion and hobby. But you have to show commitment for
22:20
Speaker 1: it to be a true passion. Okay. And the beauty
22:24
Speaker 1: about commitment. And I love this idea about commitment. I
22:27
Speaker 1: actually did this yin yoga class, and our yin yoga
22:29
Speaker 1: teacher was kind of talking about the concept of commitment
22:33
Speaker 1: quite a bit over that class. It was phenomenal. I
22:35
Speaker 1: loved it. I literally should have it on as a
22:37
Speaker 1: guest on the podcast. But this idea of commitment is
22:40
Speaker 1: really really cool because when you truly commit to something
22:43
Speaker 1: that is for you, I'm not talking about a relationship
22:47
Speaker 1: that is personal, that is one of the best ways
22:50
Speaker 1: to show up for yourself and to increase your self love,
22:53
Speaker 1: your self esteem, all of that, because the commitment is
22:55
Speaker 1: saying I'm choosing to be here and to do the above.
23:01
Speaker 1: Anything else right now, at this time, I could be
23:04
Speaker 1: doing twenty other things right now, but I am committing
23:08
Speaker 1: to be here, to put in the effort and to
23:10
Speaker 1: do it again, and also to do it repeatedly, to
23:13
Speaker 1: do it next week and the week after and the
23:15
Speaker 1: week after, or tomorrow, the day after, the day after
23:17
Speaker 1: the day after. When you commit to something, it's really
23:20
Speaker 1: fucking special, and especially when it is for an internal reason. Okay,
23:25
Speaker 1: when you can commit to something that for exactly okay,
23:27
Speaker 1: I'll give you an example. If there is no major
23:31
Speaker 1: and when I say major, immediate negative repercussions, but you're
23:36
Speaker 1: still choosing to do it. That's what I call a commitment. So,
23:38
Speaker 1: for example, if I'm doing a degree, degrees cost money,
23:43
Speaker 1: they cost time, they cost effort. To fail is a
23:45
Speaker 1: fuck around because then you're going to raise it the
23:47
Speaker 1: whole fucking thing. So yes, I'm committing to do the degree,
23:51
Speaker 1: but I also have a huge negative repercussion if I
23:54
Speaker 1: don't do that thing. So I am committing, But I
23:56
Speaker 1: also am kind of borderline forced to do this thing
24:00
Speaker 1: because the downside of me not doing it is too great.
24:05
Speaker 1: It's too great a punishment for me not to do it.
24:07
Speaker 1: So I'm kind of in a way forced to do
24:09
Speaker 1: it right. But going to yoga, there's no immediate negative repercussion.
24:14
Speaker 1: I could easily be like, oh, but I'm on my couch,
24:17
Speaker 1: I don't have to go to yoga. But the times
24:20
Speaker 1: where I feel the most like, oh, I'm not in
24:23
Speaker 1: the mood is where I peel myself up and go
24:26
Speaker 1: because I think this is the time more than ever
24:29
Speaker 1: that I need it. Because I go, I switch off
24:33
Speaker 1: from the rest of the world. You've got no devices,
24:34
Speaker 1: you've got nothing, you're calm, you're in the zone, your preyer.
24:37
Speaker 1: And then every time I've walked out of yoga, I
24:39
Speaker 1: felt I'm so happy I did that thing. Okay, but
24:41
Speaker 1: that's a commitment because there's no immediate negative repercussion for
24:46
Speaker 1: not doing it. So I want you to ask yourself,
24:49
Speaker 1: is there a way that I could turn this around
24:51
Speaker 1: to demonstrate a level of commitment here? Because once you
24:54
Speaker 1: start to commit to something small or big, but ideally small,
24:58
Speaker 1: if you're just starting out so you don't overWe yourself
25:00
Speaker 1: commit to something, you start to feel proud of yourself.
25:05
Speaker 1: You start to impress yourself, You start to think, well,
25:07
Speaker 1: that was really good. You start to value yourself and
25:10
Speaker 1: your time more. Because if someone says, hey, do you
25:14
Speaker 1: want to come to this party whatever, and you say, well,
25:16
Speaker 1: I've actually booked this thing for me that I'm doing,
25:19
Speaker 1: You've now gone bang. I value this thing. I'm important.
25:22
Speaker 1: It matters to me. It matters that I spend this time,
25:24
Speaker 1: that I invest this time, that I'm growing, that I'm connected.
25:28
Speaker 1: And then before you know it, you're like, Wow, that
25:31
Speaker 1: has increased my confidence. That's increased my self esteem. I
25:35
Speaker 1: feel better about myself. I'm impressing myself. I my self
25:39
Speaker 1: talk has gotten kinder and kinder and kinder. Okay. So
25:43
Speaker 1: that's why I think the difference between passion and hobby.
25:46
Speaker 1: A passion should fulfill your sense of self. It should
25:49
Speaker 1: fulfill you as an individual. It should compliment you, It
25:53
Speaker 1: should work towards your self love, your self esteem, all
25:57
Speaker 1: of those things. I think that's really really important. But basically,
26:18
Speaker 1: if you have to do something because the consequences are
26:20
Speaker 1: so great, if you don't, that's not a significant commitment.
26:23
Speaker 1: Then if you do it for internal reasons, so for example,
26:26
Speaker 1: returning to the parking meters to put more money in
26:29
Speaker 1: the meta to avoid a fine versus getting off the
26:33
Speaker 1: couch and going to do that class. One is to
26:35
Speaker 1: avoid a fine, and the other is to see a
26:37
Speaker 1: benefit in your mood. Okay, So there's no immediate negative
26:41
Speaker 1: consequences for not doing that yoga class or for not
26:43
Speaker 1: doing that meditation, but you will see a long term
26:48
Speaker 1: impact on your mood and all of those things. Okay.
26:51
Speaker 1: Another great thing about diving deeper into something before it
26:54
Speaker 1: becomes a passion is that it makes you come up
26:57
Speaker 1: against challenges. You figure out, Oh, I'm not good at this,
27:00
Speaker 1: got to get better at that. Oh this? You know,
27:01
Speaker 1: I decided to start gymnastics as an adult, and you know,
27:04
Speaker 1: I realized I'm shit at all these things. I personally
27:06
Speaker 1: haven't but I would actually love to start gymnastics as
27:08
Speaker 1: an adult. But anyway, moving on, I see that I
27:10
Speaker 1: need to work on this. I need to work on that.
27:12
Speaker 1: Coming across challenges. Identifying your challenges and then overcoming them
27:17
Speaker 1: is one of the greatest ways to release dopamine. I've
27:21
Speaker 1: identified a challenge, I need to figure out how I'm
27:25
Speaker 1: going to overcome it. What are the steps that I
27:26
Speaker 1: need to get there. I see improvement, I see I
27:28
Speaker 1: get better, and then I master that thing that I
27:31
Speaker 1: thought I'd never do. Now it's the next thing. Now
27:33
Speaker 1: it's the next thing. So it's this earned success. It's
27:36
Speaker 1: this reward that you get, and of course dopamine is released.
27:41
Speaker 1: It's like a reward seeking thing. So you get this
27:44
Speaker 1: nice release of dopamine, but it's earned dopamine, so you
27:46
Speaker 1: don't then get that plummet dip below based onine like
27:49
Speaker 1: you do with addictive behaviors. You feel fucking good, you
27:52
Speaker 1: feel on top of the world, and that that what's
27:55
Speaker 1: going on in the brain, this connection, this oxytocin, this
27:58
Speaker 1: reward chemical, the dopamine, you start actually on a chemical
28:02
Speaker 1: level impacting or influencing how your brain perceives that thing.
28:07
Speaker 1: So if you can always find ways to overcome challenges,
28:10
Speaker 1: to grow, to invest more time and energy where it
28:14
Speaker 1: makes you feel good, you're committing to something, You're getting
28:16
Speaker 1: dopamin you're getting serotonin, you're getting oxytocin. You then think
28:20
Speaker 1: that thing that I was like, ah about, I've I
28:24
Speaker 1: get back what I put in. I started putting in,
28:27
Speaker 1: this effort I started doing, and now it's a passion.
28:30
Speaker 1: Now I'm excited for the next session. Now I'm actually
28:33
Speaker 1: going to be the one that instigates the next session.
28:37
Speaker 1: I'm going to look things up in my own spare time.
28:40
Speaker 1: I could be on social media, or i could be
28:42
Speaker 1: reading up on this thing that I'm so excited about
28:44
Speaker 1: that I want to get better at. Okay, that drive
28:48
Speaker 1: comes from the initial effort, and when you start overcoming
28:52
Speaker 1: small challenges, that's when you get the dopamine release. That's
28:54
Speaker 1: when you start to feel like, really, I'm now invested
28:57
Speaker 1: in this thing. I now feel good and now really
28:59
Speaker 1: fucking like it. Okay. Now, when you're looking at a
29:02
Speaker 1: passion I don't want you to dilute it either. So
29:05
Speaker 1: if what I mean by that is I don't want
29:08
Speaker 1: you to grab this thing and think, wow, fucking love
29:10
Speaker 1: this thing? Now, how can I turn it into every
29:13
Speaker 1: aspect of my job? So I want to make it
29:15
Speaker 1: my job. It has to tie into every fucking area
29:17
Speaker 1: of my life. It has to my partner has to
29:19
Speaker 1: do it with me, my friends have to do it
29:20
Speaker 1: with me, or whatever. You're going to dilute it. It
29:23
Speaker 1: is not only fine, but sometimes even nicer to have
29:28
Speaker 1: a passion just be your thing and not connected to
29:32
Speaker 1: I mean, look, my passion is connected to my income,
29:36
Speaker 1: which is great and I've found a way to make
29:39
Speaker 1: it work, but there's been times where it's been frustrating
29:41
Speaker 1: because when things haven't gone well for me professionally, then
29:44
Speaker 1: it's kind of my passion has taken a dip, if
29:46
Speaker 1: that makes sense. So I actually think it's really nice
29:49
Speaker 1: to find a passion that is not related to income,
29:54
Speaker 1: not something that you do with friends, family, or partner.
29:57
Speaker 1: It's just your thing that you do. It is so
30:01
Speaker 1: nice because it is untainted by anything and it's isolated there.
30:07
Speaker 1: You can choose to bring make it bigger some weeks,
30:09
Speaker 1: you can choose to keep it there, but it is
30:11
Speaker 1: like your outlet. Okay, now, if one of your because again,
30:16
Speaker 1: you can have multiple passions, but if one of your
30:17
Speaker 1: passions does bleed into all areas, if you're life, that's
30:19
Speaker 1: fucking fine. There's nothing wrong with that. But the reason
30:22
Speaker 1: I say this is because for the most part, and
30:24
Speaker 1: the way making money works, in the way careers work,
30:26
Speaker 1: a lot of people are not going to be working
30:28
Speaker 1: in their passion. And I don't want you to think
30:30
Speaker 1: that you are living an unfulfilled life because you're not
30:32
Speaker 1: working in your passion. There's a lot to be said
30:34
Speaker 1: to work the nine to five, switch the fuck off
30:36
Speaker 1: once you're done, and then you're like leaning into your
30:39
Speaker 1: passion whatever. There's there's so much good that can come
30:41
Speaker 1: from that. So don't think that you're not fulfilled because
30:44
Speaker 1: your career or your job is not your passion. It's
30:48
Speaker 1: nice to have a passion that's not connected. You don't
30:50
Speaker 1: have to dilute your passion and have it blend into
30:53
Speaker 1: everything else. Okay. I also don't want you to get
30:57
Speaker 1: fixated on this idea that your life dream have to
31:00
Speaker 1: be your passion. It's this one thing and it all
31:02
Speaker 1: ties in together, a purpose, a passion, my life achievement.
31:06
Speaker 1: It has to be this one thing. Okay. You have
31:09
Speaker 1: so much more control over your passion or your multiple
31:12
Speaker 1: passions than you realize. Okay. Another thing is, don't get
31:16
Speaker 1: fixated on your life dreams having to be your passion. Okay,
31:20
Speaker 1: and it's this one thing and I've got to do
31:24
Speaker 1: this thing and I've got to make it happen, and
31:26
Speaker 1: if it doesn't, then how am I going to be happy?
31:28
Speaker 1: And don't have a plan be only your plan A,
31:30
Speaker 1: you know, plan bs and for people that are you know,
31:33
Speaker 1: not prepared to win all that shit. Okay, I want
31:37
Speaker 1: you to look at your passions as something that you
31:40
Speaker 1: got way more control over, that's way more flexible, it's
31:43
Speaker 1: way more fluid. Okay, there are There's an infinite number
31:48
Speaker 1: of things that you can find your passion in or
31:50
Speaker 1: be passionate about. You could have multiple passions in completely
31:54
Speaker 1: different things. There's not this one thing. There's not this
31:57
Speaker 1: one passion. There's not one version of life that you'll be,
32:00
Speaker 1: and there's not one partner in this world that's only
32:02
Speaker 1: going to make you happy. There's not one group. There's options, thousands,
32:07
Speaker 1: if not more options for you. And I want you
32:10
Speaker 1: to look at passion in particular as something that you
32:13
Speaker 1: have a lot of fucking control over, more control over
32:17
Speaker 1: than most other things in your life. You have more
32:20
Speaker 1: control over what your passion can be than you do
32:22
Speaker 1: over relationships, over career, over friendships, romantic over so where
32:29
Speaker 1: you live. The reason for that is that with all
32:32
Speaker 1: these other things, it involves the input of another person,
32:37
Speaker 1: a group of people, your career, there's so many things
32:39
Speaker 1: that can fluctuate within a career, But your passion, even
32:44
Speaker 1: especially like the ones that are not connected to career
32:47
Speaker 1: and your relationships, you have so much fucking control over
32:50
Speaker 1: You can chop and change your passion as many times
32:52
Speaker 1: as you want. You can. You know, this used to
32:55
Speaker 1: be my passion, but now I've evolved into this thing.
32:57
Speaker 1: You can choose how much time you invest into it.
33:00
Speaker 1: You get back what you put in. You can one
33:03
Speaker 1: day think this thing no longer makes me passionate, and
33:05
Speaker 1: then switch your focus and go and search for something
33:07
Speaker 1: new that makes you passionate about I today could decide
33:11
Speaker 1: I'm ready for a new passion. I want something random.
33:13
Speaker 1: I want to be passionate about it. I want to
33:15
Speaker 1: invest in it. I want to become like not obsessed,
33:18
Speaker 1: but basically obsessed with something new and start looking for
33:21
Speaker 1: that thing and start investing time and put it in
33:22
Speaker 1: my feelers out then think this is my new project
33:24
Speaker 1: I'm going to create and your passion for myself. That's
33:27
Speaker 1: the beauty of it. You have so much fucking control
33:28
Speaker 1: over it, so much control. You have to identify that
33:31
Speaker 1: it's not you know, I have to It's not this purpose,
33:34
Speaker 1: this life career, it's whatever it. Make a way, simplify it,
33:37
Speaker 1: simplify Remember what I said at the start of the episode.
33:39
Speaker 1: The point of a passion is to improve your relationship
33:44
Speaker 1: with yourself. Okay, So let's break down before I go
33:46
Speaker 1: into the questions, let's break down the main key points
33:49
Speaker 1: very quickly. So it must require effort, initiative. You've got
33:53
Speaker 1: to be the one driving it, commitment. Okay, I'm going
33:56
Speaker 1: to be doing this above all the other things that
33:58
Speaker 1: I could be doing right now. I'm choosing to do
34:00
Speaker 1: this not because there's a negative repercussion, but because it's
34:02
Speaker 1: a choice, willingness to overcome challenges, because you see the
34:06
Speaker 1: value in it. And that's where you see that shift
34:09
Speaker 1: where it starts to feel great on a chemical level
34:12
Speaker 1: in the brain, your desire to explore, based on passive consumption,
34:16
Speaker 1: your desire to grow and obtain more knowledge on that thing.
34:22
Speaker 1: It does not need to be one thing. You can
34:23
Speaker 1: have many. It does not need to be your identity
34:26
Speaker 1: or your purpose or linked to income. In fact, it's
34:29
Speaker 1: nice and when it's not, and it must be satisfying
34:32
Speaker 1: to you on a personal level, it's got to be personal.
34:36
Speaker 1: It's got to be personally satisfying. Okay, being not saying, oh,
34:40
Speaker 1: making my children happy makes me passionate. No, no, no,
34:44
Speaker 1: that could be very fulfilling for you. But I'm talking
34:47
Speaker 1: about a personal thing that's for you. Okay, So it's
34:51
Speaker 1: not you putting in all this effort and then seeing
34:53
Speaker 1: someone else that could make you feel happy. But the
34:55
Speaker 1: point of this episode is for you to find things
34:57
Speaker 1: that you see personal growth, in personal fulfillment in personal Okay,
35:02
Speaker 1: now let's answer your questions. Someone said, what do you
35:07
Speaker 1: do when you don't know what your passions are? So
35:10
Speaker 1: that was the main question, and I've probably already answered
35:13
Speaker 1: it in the episode. But the main thing that you've
35:14
Speaker 1: got to do is if you haven't found a passion yet,
35:17
Speaker 1: keep number one, try multiple things, and number two ask yourself.
35:21
Speaker 1: Have all the things that I've tried just been on
35:22
Speaker 1: a passive consumption level, because it's going to require me
35:26
Speaker 1: taking initiative even if it's not yet my passion. I
35:29
Speaker 1: need to go in and book that rock climbing session
35:31
Speaker 1: on my own or invite someone and they can comment
35:33
Speaker 1: or not if they don't want to. I need to
35:34
Speaker 1: commit to doing that thing. I'm going to do it
35:36
Speaker 1: and then it might turn into my passion. Or that
35:38
Speaker 1: hip hop dance class and I'm fifty five years old,
35:40
Speaker 1: I'm going to fucking book that hip hop dance class
35:43
Speaker 1: and see if it can become my passion. I'm God,
35:45
Speaker 1: I have to go out of my way. So ask
35:48
Speaker 1: yourself all the things I've tried, am I actively engaging
35:53
Speaker 1: or is it passive? If it's passive, there's one of
35:55
Speaker 1: your answers. You need to put in the effort to
35:57
Speaker 1: actively engage. Then you can really know if it's something
36:00
Speaker 1: that can become a passion or not. Another thing is
36:04
Speaker 1: that you ask yourself those questions again, you know, is
36:07
Speaker 1: there a willingness to grow? And am I feeling connected?
36:10
Speaker 1: Because if you're doing something you're like, yeah, this is fun,
36:12
Speaker 1: like I do like maybe you do trivia. Yeah this
36:15
Speaker 1: is fun. This is a hobby, but I don't really
36:17
Speaker 1: seek to do anything outside of that. Okay, fine, that's
36:20
Speaker 1: a hobby. That's not a passion. So when it comes
36:23
Speaker 1: to passions, keep it fucking simple, make it smaller. But
36:26
Speaker 1: you have to actively be doing it yourself. You have
36:32
Speaker 1: to take initiative and it's going to be driven by you.
36:34
Speaker 1: If it's always driven by somebody else, then either start
36:36
Speaker 1: making it driven by you and see if you're you
36:39
Speaker 1: change your perspective on that hobby or not. You also
36:42
Speaker 1: have to think about momentum. You have to start the momentum.
36:45
Speaker 1: At the beginning, it's going to be hard. But once
36:47
Speaker 1: you get that ball rolling, then you're not going to
36:49
Speaker 1: be able to contain how many different things that you
36:51
Speaker 1: want to do. There's there'll be so many things that
36:53
Speaker 1: you want to do and explore blahlah, because it's all
36:55
Speaker 1: momentum like attracts like Okay. Then someone said, I'm passionate
37:01
Speaker 1: about the Spanish language, but I'm unsure if turning a
37:05
Speaker 1: passion into a job will spoil it. This is such
37:07
Speaker 1: a fucking good question. So you are thinking if you
37:11
Speaker 1: should teach Spanish, I'm guessing turning a passion into a job.
37:15
Speaker 1: Passionate about the Spanish language, So I'm guessing. Let's, for
37:18
Speaker 1: argument's sake, say you love Spanish and you're thinking, should
37:21
Speaker 1: I become a Spanish teacher because I love it so much?
37:24
Speaker 1: The question you should be asking here is what does
37:26
Speaker 1: the job entail? It entails teaching and working with people,
37:30
Speaker 1: So teaching people put Spanish aside? Am I interested not
37:34
Speaker 1: even passionate? But am I interested in working with people?
37:38
Speaker 1: In teaching people? What do the hours look like? What
37:40
Speaker 1: would the job look like? Am I working for myself?
37:43
Speaker 1: Am I working for another, because they're two completely separate things.
37:48
Speaker 1: One is the job in the parameters of what that
37:50
Speaker 1: job looks like, with the actual job tasks of what
37:52
Speaker 1: that looks like. And one is a language where you
37:55
Speaker 1: can learn more about the culture, where you can go
37:57
Speaker 1: visit those countries, Hispanic countries where you can So they're
38:01
Speaker 1: very different things. Now, if you like the two things,
38:03
Speaker 1: then you're like, this could be a job that I
38:05
Speaker 1: really enjoy. I could be passionate about it, but at
38:08
Speaker 1: least it's a job that I really enjoy. But don't
38:10
Speaker 1: make the mistake of thinking, well, I like this so
38:13
Speaker 1: I must like everything to do with it, because that's
38:16
Speaker 1: not necessarily the case. You might be like, wow, I
38:19
Speaker 1: fucking hate teaching, and now it's made me like not
38:22
Speaker 1: interested in Spanish anymore because it's ruined it. So you
38:24
Speaker 1: got to ask yourself, am I actually interested in the
38:27
Speaker 1: ins and outs of teaching or of the job itself,
38:31
Speaker 1: because they're two very different things. Next one is I'm
38:35
Speaker 1: unsure on finding jobs related to passion. I think if
38:40
Speaker 1: something can I think if you are in a position
38:43
Speaker 1: where you can do a job that is your passion,
38:45
Speaker 1: I would not like shy away from that. I'd absolutely
38:49
Speaker 1: lean in. But I don't think that you should be
38:51
Speaker 1: putting so much pressure on yourself thinking that my job
38:54
Speaker 1: has to be something that is a passion because A
38:57
Speaker 1: you could turn into a passion later. B. A job
39:00
Speaker 1: could be a stepping stone to something else, say, it
39:02
Speaker 1: could lead you to something. I think, I don't want
39:05
Speaker 1: you to feel this pressure that if it's not your passion,
39:08
Speaker 1: that you're not fulfilled. Okay, if you have enough passions
39:12
Speaker 1: in your life, or if you have a big enough
39:13
Speaker 1: passion in your life, then you can do things that
39:16
Speaker 1: might not be as exciting and still be extremely fulfilled. Right.
39:20
Speaker 1: So what I like to look at is if it's possible,
39:23
Speaker 1: I would really like to be passionate about my job
39:25
Speaker 1: and my career. But in the meantime, is this happening
39:28
Speaker 1: right now? Okay? And if it's not happening right now
39:31
Speaker 1: that I'm not going to beat myself up about it.
39:33
Speaker 1: I'm still going to work on passions outside of that.
39:35
Speaker 1: And the beauty of it is when you start to
39:37
Speaker 1: find passions outside of your job, you get inspired. You
39:40
Speaker 1: think either I now want to change my career I
39:43
Speaker 1: found my thing, or you think I love this so
39:46
Speaker 1: much that I actually enjoy being able to switch off,
39:49
Speaker 1: do my job, be fucking good at it, and then
39:52
Speaker 1: pour all my energy and all that into my passion. Okay,
39:56
Speaker 1: so two good things can come of it, But I
39:58
Speaker 1: don't think you should be searching for the two at
40:00
Speaker 1: the same time, because you limit what it is that
40:02
Speaker 1: your passion can be. I think you should always be
40:04
Speaker 1: looking for your passion on the side. And this can
40:07
Speaker 1: come in the way of many things. And the beauty
40:09
Speaker 1: of it is when you find one passion, it's easier
40:11
Speaker 1: to find the next, and the next, and the next
40:13
Speaker 1: and the next, to the point where you're like, there's
40:15
Speaker 1: all these things that I want to do, but I
40:16
Speaker 1: just don't have time. Someone said, I'm thirty one and
40:20
Speaker 1: I still haven't found it, even though I've tried different courses.
40:23
Speaker 1: What do I do? So I think that I would
40:27
Speaker 1: try like a time period thing where instead of just
40:30
Speaker 1: trying something here, dabbling there, dabbling there, I want you
40:33
Speaker 1: to pick one thing that you're like, that you're obviously
40:36
Speaker 1: interested enough in, but maybe it doesn't feel like a passion,
40:38
Speaker 1: and think, how can I go all in to the
40:41
Speaker 1: point where it requires all this effort and whatever and
40:43
Speaker 1: just make it a fun project for yourself and have, like,
40:46
Speaker 1: you know, milestones that you want to achieve, whether it
40:49
Speaker 1: be in painting or pottery or a sport or whatever.
40:52
Speaker 1: And but go all in, read up on it, understand
40:55
Speaker 1: more about it, you know, take initiative and see if
40:58
Speaker 1: that begins to change for you. Okay, because again, how
41:02
Speaker 1: active can I be in this? And can that then
41:05
Speaker 1: turn my attitude around it? And can I become passionate?
41:07
Speaker 1: And then if the answer is no, then at least
41:09
Speaker 1: you would have taught yourself, you know, more things around commitment,
41:13
Speaker 1: more things about you know, taking an initiative to do
41:16
Speaker 1: some things, making a personal making it about connection, all
41:18
Speaker 1: these things, and then you're able to then apply that
41:21
Speaker 1: to the next thing. Someone said, how often does your
41:24
Speaker 1: passion change? That depends on the individual, And it changes
41:27
Speaker 1: as long as it serves you. Because as we know,
41:30
Speaker 1: our lives go through so many different evolutions, Like there's
41:34
Speaker 1: so many different phases of our lives, and a passion
41:37
Speaker 1: may last your whole life, but often it doesn't, and
41:39
Speaker 1: it can last just a couple of years. You can then,
41:42
Speaker 1: you know, have a different group of friends or meet
41:44
Speaker 1: different people. You're inspired to do different things. So there's
41:47
Speaker 1: no answer on how often, but I just want you
41:51
Speaker 1: to feel that it can be whenever, and it's perfectly
41:54
Speaker 1: fine for your passions to change. There's nothing wrong with that.
41:56
Speaker 1: Look at our interests, look at our friendships, look at
41:59
Speaker 1: how much we evolve in so many other things, so
42:02
Speaker 1: it makes sense that would evolve as well. Someone said,
42:05
Speaker 1: do you believe everyone has a passion? So I believe
42:08
Speaker 1: that everyone is capable of having a passion, but I
42:11
Speaker 1: don't believe that everyone currently has one. I feel like
42:14
Speaker 1: it's definitely not something that it's assigned at birth. You
42:18
Speaker 1: have to go after it, you have to discover it
42:20
Speaker 1: through trial and error. It's like it's not going to
42:24
Speaker 1: knock on your door, and it for some people it
42:27
Speaker 1: feels like a light bulb moment, but for a lot
42:30
Speaker 1: of people it's walking through many, many different doors to
42:33
Speaker 1: get to this moment of like, Wow, I've come to
42:36
Speaker 1: realize that this is now my passion and if I
42:38
Speaker 1: didn't do it, I'd actually be quite sad to not
42:40
Speaker 1: be able to do it. Okay, now, someone wrote, trying
42:43
Speaker 1: to pursue my passion as a career, but there's no
42:46
Speaker 1: jobs as news reporters in my city when slash Should
42:50
Speaker 1: I give up on my passion? And how do I
42:53
Speaker 1: know if it's my passion or if I'm just passionate
42:55
Speaker 1: about something? So I think personally, I believe that being
42:59
Speaker 1: passionate about something and something being your passion is the
43:01
Speaker 1: same thing. And you can be passionate about multiple things.
43:04
Speaker 1: You can have multiple passions. I feel like when it
43:08
Speaker 1: comes to this question that you asked about your career,
43:12
Speaker 1: you know, if you should give up on something, if
43:14
Speaker 1: the cost to attain that thing is something that you're
43:17
Speaker 1: not willing to do, That's how I look at it.
43:20
Speaker 1: And also you got to ask yourself is it serving me?
43:22
Speaker 1: So those two questions. So for you, you said there's
43:25
Speaker 1: no jobs as news reporters in my city, Should I
43:29
Speaker 1: give up my passion? Well, if that's a fact and
43:32
Speaker 1: there are no jobs as news reporters and you've not
43:36
Speaker 1: thought I'm going to move cities, then yes, you should
43:40
Speaker 1: give up. Because I don't understand, like if it's black
43:42
Speaker 1: and white, If there's absolutely no jobs and you do
43:44
Speaker 1: not want to move, well, then there's no jobs. What
43:47
Speaker 1: is the point of pursuing something that's absolutely impossible to
43:49
Speaker 1: pursue it? So, like me, saying, should I pursue being
43:52
Speaker 1: an astronaut given that there's no way I could do
43:57
Speaker 1: it because I'm too old and I have no Do
44:00
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? So I guess maybe deep
44:03
Speaker 1: down part if you was thinking do I move? Do
44:05
Speaker 1: I go somewhere else and really try and make it happen?
44:09
Speaker 1: Do I do it at all cost? That's probably your
44:11
Speaker 1: question because I don't think you'd be asking this question
44:14
Speaker 1: if you're like, I'm fucking never moving, don't want to move.
44:16
Speaker 1: I love where I am, I've never moved, but there's
44:17
Speaker 1: no jobs. Because you have the answer, I don't have
44:20
Speaker 1: to give you that answer. So then your next question
44:22
Speaker 1: is is the cost of moving cities too great? Is
44:29
Speaker 1: do I love where I live too much? I'm close
44:31
Speaker 1: to the people that I love, I love my life,
44:34
Speaker 1: I love everything about it, but Lee and this is
44:37
Speaker 1: my favorite city in the world, and leaving is just
44:39
Speaker 1: not worth it because so many other things make me happy,
44:42
Speaker 1: and as much as I want to be a news reporter,
44:43
Speaker 1: I'm just not worth leaving the city. If that's the answer,
44:46
Speaker 1: then that's another good time to be able to be like,
44:49
Speaker 1: all right, I'm gonna shift my focus and try something else,
44:51
Speaker 1: because you have to ask yourself, is the cost to
44:53
Speaker 1: obtain this thing too great? Or is the cost to
44:56
Speaker 1: try to obtain that thing too great? Because you could
44:59
Speaker 1: move cities in it, it's still not happen for you,
45:01
Speaker 1: but at least you can feel like I was willing
45:03
Speaker 1: to put in that cost and I learned something, or
45:05
Speaker 1: it was like good for me, I had growth, whatever.
45:08
Speaker 1: I just want you to really always be weighing up
45:11
Speaker 1: the cost and also say to yourself, is this thing
45:15
Speaker 1: fulfilling to me? And then because like for example, when
45:18
Speaker 1: I gave up acting, it was no longer fulfilling to me.
45:21
Speaker 1: It was actually like carrying a fucking dead weight around
45:25
Speaker 1: with me because it gave me anxiety. Okay, but if
45:27
Speaker 1: it's fulfilling, then you can keep going at it. If
45:29
Speaker 1: you think I'm willing to put in the cost to
45:31
Speaker 1: try other things, then absolutely keep going at it. But
45:33
Speaker 1: I think those are the good questions to ask yourself.
45:35
Speaker 1: Another thing, is is there a way that I could
45:39
Speaker 1: take certain aspects of this and turn it into something
45:43
Speaker 1: that I enjoy? Maybe you like presenting, maybe it's or
45:47
Speaker 1: is it i'd straight up journalism? Like what aspects of
45:50
Speaker 1: this do I love? That maybe I can't have that,
45:53
Speaker 1: but I can turn it into something else. Can I
45:55
Speaker 1: be doing my own channel on YouTube about the news?
45:59
Speaker 1: Do you know how any successful podcasts have come out
46:01
Speaker 1: that do the news and it's their own podcasts and
46:04
Speaker 1: they make full time income and they run their own show.
46:07
Speaker 1: There are so many avenues that think, well, this is
46:10
Speaker 1: not what I had in mind, but it's different and
46:13
Speaker 1: it's enjoyable, and for a lot of people it's better.
46:17
Speaker 1: I actually have found something better. Okay, one more question.
46:22
Speaker 1: How to This is an interesting question. I don't really
46:25
Speaker 1: get it, and I wish I had more insight into it,
46:26
Speaker 1: but I thought i'd I'd answer it anyway based on
46:30
Speaker 1: what I think it means. How to healthily cut out
46:32
Speaker 1: people who don't support your passion? Well, I don't really
46:35
Speaker 1: know what you mean by this, because if someone's being
46:37
Speaker 1: a straight up asshole and getting in the way of
46:40
Speaker 1: your passion or trying to sabotage you, then that's not
46:44
Speaker 1: a healthy friendship anyway. So I don't think you need
46:48
Speaker 1: to look at it about healthily removing or unhealthily removing,
46:51
Speaker 1: or if someone's actually trying to sabotage me or actively
46:56
Speaker 1: get in the way off my passion, then I would
47:00
Speaker 1: just stop giving that person airtime in my life. I
47:02
Speaker 1: would remove myself. I mean, you could have the conversation,
47:05
Speaker 1: but if it's a conscious effort to do this, then
47:08
Speaker 1: I don't think the conversation even needs to be had. However,
47:11
Speaker 1: if someone simply just does not align with your passions
47:16
Speaker 1: but is not in your way, is not trying to
47:17
Speaker 1: stop you, but you're just different people, that is not
47:21
Speaker 1: a reason to cut somebody out. For me, I would
47:25
Speaker 1: never cut somebody out just because we're different and we
47:27
Speaker 1: have different hobbies and we've got different passions. Okay, it's
47:30
Speaker 1: only an issue when they're actively trying to bring you
47:34
Speaker 1: down or sabotage you or get in your way. Okay.
47:38
Speaker 1: So I think that there's an actual, a big issue
47:41
Speaker 1: in this world where we are so drawn to seek
47:45
Speaker 1: out things that are really similar to us, too similar
47:48
Speaker 1: to us in everything. There's good in that, but there's
47:50
Speaker 1: also bad because then you cut out different people, different opinions,
47:53
Speaker 1: different viewpoints, and that's where you get divide. So ask yourself,
47:58
Speaker 1: am I just trying to cut these people that because
48:00
Speaker 1: they're not a mirror of who I want to be?
48:02
Speaker 1: Because I don't think that's a good idea. But are
48:05
Speaker 1: they actually mean or bullying or whatever, then yeah, you
48:08
Speaker 1: can just phase them out of your life. You don't
48:09
Speaker 1: even have to do it healthy. If someone's being disrespectful
48:11
Speaker 1: to me, I don't care how I cut them out.
48:14
Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be healthy. I just stop engaging, okay.
48:17
Speaker 1: But it is perfectly fine to have friends who are
48:21
Speaker 1: on completely different wavelengths when it comes to interests and
48:24
Speaker 1: opinions and whatever. You know, I've got friends who are
48:27
Speaker 1: so different to me in what I do in you know, like, yeah,
48:32
Speaker 1: morally we're quite similar, but with how we run our
48:35
Speaker 1: lives substantially different. But that's not a reason for me
48:38
Speaker 1: to not be friends with them, just because we can't
48:39
Speaker 1: do a lot of those things together, if that makes
48:41
Speaker 1: sense anyway. That is the episode of today. Hope you
48:44
Speaker 1: guys enjoyed it. Hopefully it gave you just a little
48:48
Speaker 1: a little push to want to try something different, try
48:50
Speaker 1: something new for yourself, and explore a passion. But it's
48:53
Speaker 1: not going to slap you in the face. If you
48:55
Speaker 1: feel like you're doing the same thing day and day out,
48:57
Speaker 1: then you have to change what you are doing. To
48:59
Speaker 1: change what you are receiving. If you're somebody that on
49:02
Speaker 1: your spare time doom scrolls, know that it's never going
49:06
Speaker 1: to be something that you come across on your phone,
49:08
Speaker 1: because your phone is just going to give you more
49:10
Speaker 1: of what you've already been consuming. That's what algorithms are
49:13
Speaker 1: made for. So in order to break that cycle of
49:16
Speaker 1: where you're at, not knowing where to go, you have
49:18
Speaker 1: to do something different. Okay, you just put yourself out there,
49:21
Speaker 1: try new things, take initiative, look up online what's available
49:25
Speaker 1: of things you can do around your area, and just begin.
49:28
Speaker 1: You don't have to find the passion initially. It's about
49:30
Speaker 1: getting yourself out there, committing to doing something, investing the time,
49:33
Speaker 1: be willing to put in the effort, be willing to
49:35
Speaker 1: overcome a challenge, be it small. That is how you
49:40
Speaker 1: find your passion, and you can find many passions, to
49:43
Speaker 1: the extent that hopefully, after you do what I told
49:45
Speaker 1: you to do, you will have too many passions and
49:48
Speaker 1: you won't know which one to stick to. And that's
49:50
Speaker 1: a quality problem to have. Okay, love you got so much.
49:53
Speaker 1: As always remember, be kind to yourself, be kind to
49:55
Speaker 1: your brain, don't take shit from anyone, and especially don't
49:57
Speaker 1: take shit from yourself. Don't go case scenario. But starting
50:18
Speaker 1: over happens many times in your life. Life is cyclical.
50:23
Speaker 1: Things come in waves. Careers, goals, family relationships all evolve
50:31
Speaker 1: and evolve again. So to think you have to stay
50:34
Speaker 1: in something because it is the status quo is to
50:38
Speaker 1: go against the nature of life, which is driven by
50:42
Speaker 1: constant change. Yes, you may try to create change and
50:47
Speaker 1: find that it does not go the way you planned it.
50:50
Speaker 1: Not everything does. You will not always make the correct
50:54
Speaker 1: decisions in life, and what sometimes starts off as the
50:57
Speaker 1: right decision evolves into something that no longer works for you.
51:02
Speaker 1: What you once loved you have grown out of. But
51:05
Speaker 1: the objective here is to learn to be okay without
51:08
Speaker 1: growing certain decisions, beliefs, and relationships. Life is a series
51:14
Speaker 1: of never ending contrasts. You know what you want because
51:19
Speaker 1: you have experienced what you don't want, and this understanding
51:24
Speaker 1: these lessons in life help to guide you. Another problem
51:28
Speaker 1: may be that you are terrified to start over because
51:31
Speaker 1: you are constantly comparing your timeline to those around you.
51:36
Speaker 1: This comparison of timelines has so much power over people's
51:40
Speaker 1: decisions about their own lives. When you live by a
51:43
Speaker 1: timeline and everyone around you is hitting milestones that you
51:48
Speaker 1: think you need to be hitting. Then starting over feels
51:51
Speaker 1: like the worst case scenario. Even if you are miserable
51:56
Speaker 1: with the life you have, it still feels terrifying to
51:59
Speaker 1: throw it at way because of that comparison. But I can
52:03
Speaker 1: assure you the moment you start living a life, exploring
52:07
Speaker 1: the things you want to explore, doing what you want
52:11
Speaker 1: to do, working towards something that really matters to you,
52:15
Speaker 1: everything goes out the window and comparison fades away. You
52:20
Speaker 1: do not compare yourself to others when you are satisfied,
52:24
Speaker 1: even if you are at the starting point, because your
52:27
Speaker 1: happiness is no longer based on external milestones, but instead
52:33
Speaker 1: on intrinsic things that you do for the sake of
52:36
Speaker 1: the process, not the outcome.