Latest / Son of a Boy Dad / Cool Comic Tommy | Son of a Boy Dad #160 ft. Smokes
Transcript
- 0:00Speaker 1: Hey, Son of a Boy Dad listeners. You can find
- 0:02Speaker 1: every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members
- 0:08Speaker 1: can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
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- 0:42Speaker 3: Hey, everybody, it's Vibs and this is my PSA to
- 0:45Speaker 3: remind you that golf season is officially here.
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- 1:22Speaker 4: And participating McDonald's US. Today is a date that we
- 1:25Speaker 4: do not know.
- 1:26Speaker 6: Because I'm not going back to college to be your friend.
- 1:29Speaker 6: I'm going so I can get Uber one for students.
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- 1:45Speaker 6: you think college is for get.
- 1:47Speaker 4: Uber one for students a membership to save on Uber
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- 1:58Speaker 8: It's a different date and basically.
- 2:00Speaker 9: Golf season is in full swing and getting out there
- 2:02Speaker 9: to work on your game is bound to make any
- 2:05Speaker 9: day even better. And if you're looking to improve your drive,
- 2:09Speaker 9: Chevy Equinox EV is the smartest choice you can make.
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- 2:24Speaker 9: your scorecard shakes.
- 2:25Speaker 8: Out where in the past.
- 2:26Speaker 1: But you might not even be listening to this on
- 2:29Speaker 1: the day that it comes out, so the date doesn't
- 2:31Speaker 1: even necessarily really matter that much.
- 2:32Speaker 4: It's true. I like to assume that everyone's listening the
- 2:34Speaker 4: second it comes out.
- 2:35Speaker 1: Though, But I thought it's an undisclosed date and I
- 2:38Speaker 1: need a vacation, if you know what I mean.
- 2:43Speaker 7: You guys are evergreen.
- 2:44Speaker 1: Oh but I and I always need a vacation and
- 2:47Speaker 1: a cold drink in my hand, exactly like a fucking
- 2:49Speaker 1: Jimmy Buffett song.
- 2:50Speaker 4: A Jimmy Buffetts song.
- 2:52Speaker 1: I need a vacation. I played too much PlayStation be
- 3:00Speaker 1: on the beach every day.
- 3:02Speaker 4: Tell me how you like in Chicago?
- 3:04Speaker 7: Love it, Wendy City, How do you like it?
- 3:08Speaker 1: Give us some us something? Give us something her.
- 3:11Speaker 4: Sorry, I had a potato chip in the back of
- 3:13Speaker 4: my A lot of people were saying you might be
- 3:14Speaker 4: moving out here.
- 3:15Speaker 7: Yeah, A lot of people are saying they were actually
- 3:16Speaker 7: building my own office out here.
- 3:18Speaker 8: Oh really, Yeah, they made the blitz.
- 3:20Speaker 1: I heard that Big Tea and fucking White Sox Dave
- 3:23Speaker 1: sat you down and made a blitz on you.
- 3:24Speaker 8: They made a serious to have you joined the content.
- 3:27Speaker 7: We have a crew and we need a third bad Yeah.
- 3:30Speaker 8: I heard you.
- 3:30Speaker 1: Guys are about to start doing fashion influencing me.
- 3:34Speaker 7: Big t in White Sox day a little Abercrombie shirt.
- 3:36Speaker 7: It's not a bad shirt.
- 3:37Speaker 8: It's your best shirt you've ever had.
- 3:39Speaker 7: Wow, I have another one in a very similar but
- 3:41Speaker 7: slightly different color. Be on the lookout for that.
- 3:43Speaker 4: I could teach you a couple of things about fashion
- 3:45Speaker 4: if you need tips.
- 3:46Speaker 7: Should I wear a beanie?
- 3:47Speaker 4: Yeah?
- 3:48Speaker 7: How often you watch that?
- 3:49Speaker 4: I watched it a couple of days ago.
- 3:51Speaker 7: That doesn't answer my question. That was the first time
- 3:53Speaker 7: I've ever watched That does answer my question.
- 3:56Speaker 4: I just my mom asked me what I wanted for Christmas,
- 3:59Speaker 4: and I sent her the exact same being because.
- 4:02Speaker 8: Why because yours has like too many nits.
- 4:04Speaker 4: Now, mine's just stretched out and it doesn't really stay up.
- 4:07Speaker 4: I gotta adjust it constantly.
- 4:09Speaker 8: Oh, it falls down.
- 4:09Speaker 1: It's droopy.
- 4:10Speaker 4: It's so stretched. It's not a wrecked No, I need
- 4:12Speaker 4: a Now, I need a new firm one because you're
- 4:14Speaker 4: getting a big head. Bro As for a green one,
- 4:18Speaker 4: Neon the are heart? What as for one of those
- 4:21Speaker 4: Neon green car heart beanies? Why just think those are
- 4:25Speaker 4: swagger as hell?
- 4:26Speaker 1: You're about to move to Brooklyn?
- 4:27Speaker 7: For real?
- 4:27Speaker 8: I can tell the writing I.
- 4:29Speaker 4: Forget I'm getting adjusted.
- 4:30Speaker 7: Do you wear those every time you do stand up?
- 4:32Speaker 7: You wear the same one? It's like your thing.
- 4:34Speaker 4: No, it's because my hair is too long.
- 4:36Speaker 7: There's a you know there's a solution for that.
- 4:38Speaker 4: You get a haircut.
- 4:38Speaker 7: Yeah.
- 4:38Speaker 4: I don't like getting haircuts.
- 4:40Speaker 7: All right, between a rock and a artla.
- 4:42Speaker 4: I love when I get a haircut because it's so
- 4:43Speaker 4: much easier, and then I just don't get it cut
- 4:45Speaker 4: for another I haven't gotten a haircut since the Barstool
- 4:47Speaker 4: twentieth anniversary.
- 4:48Speaker 8: You just said you don't like getting haircuts, but you
- 4:50Speaker 8: love when you get a haircut.
- 4:51Speaker 4: Yeah, but I don't like the act of getting it cut. Well,
- 4:54Speaker 4: it hurts because ninety percent of the time they fuck
- 4:55Speaker 4: it up.
- 4:56Speaker 8: You got sensitive.
- 4:57Speaker 7: Barbers love braggon that they could cut hair, like I'll
- 5:00Speaker 7: ask for a trim. I'd be like, just a little trim,
- 5:02Speaker 7: and they always take away more off.
- 5:03Speaker 4: Yeah, and then you leave looking like fucking Ellen degenerous.
- 5:06Speaker 7: Yeah, it's like, I get it, you can cut hair.
- 5:07Speaker 7: You don't have to prove it and cut more than
- 5:09Speaker 7: I ask.
- 5:10Speaker 4: It's annoying as fuck. Yeah, especially in New York. The
- 5:12Speaker 4: barber's in New York, they don't really cut my hair. Well,
- 5:14Speaker 4: I gotta go back to Massachusetts and go to Supercuts.
- 5:16Speaker 1: Yeah, they always try and give you my girl.
- 5:18Speaker 4: My girls over at Supercuts really know what they're doing.
- 5:20Speaker 1: Yeah, you need the girls, not.
- 5:21Speaker 7: The I trust. I don't trust a woman barber.
- 5:23Speaker 4: I only trust a woman barber.
- 5:25Speaker 7: You know.
- 5:25Speaker 1: There's this like woman barber that is by our office
- 5:29Speaker 1: on like maybe across from that Peruvian place we went
- 5:33Speaker 1: to that one time.
- 5:35Speaker 7: Oh yeah, on.
- 5:36Speaker 8: The same street as Pasillo's.
- 5:37Speaker 1: But there's this woman barber and she always wears like
- 5:40Speaker 1: blue mini skirts like she's in the nineteen fifties, and
- 5:43Speaker 1: she has a man who drives a fucking bright blue
- 5:46Speaker 1: convertible that they park right outside of the barber shop.
- 5:49Speaker 1: She's like a movie character. I've never seen anything like it.
- 5:52Speaker 1: She's probably terrible at cutting hair, but she's very stimulating
- 5:55Speaker 1: as far as just an interesting different character.
- 5:58Speaker 7: You need those.
- 5:59Speaker 1: Yeah, you should try try her ass out. But other
- 6:02Speaker 1: than that, I think all the barbers in New York
- 6:04Speaker 1: or Dominican boys.
- 6:05Speaker 4: Yeah, the Dominican boys really fucked out.
- 6:07Speaker 7: There's a lot of Russians, A lot of a.
- 6:09Speaker 4: Lot of Russians go to a lot I was actually
- 6:11Speaker 4: there's a Russian barber right near the office that I
- 6:13Speaker 4: go to sometimes.
- 6:14Speaker 7: Yeah, my guy's Russian.
- 6:15Speaker 1: A lot of Russians. Yeah, my guy's Russian too. A
- 6:17Speaker 1: lot of Russian or and they would claim Ukrainian for
- 6:20Speaker 1: about a year. Yeah, yeah, it would like falsely claim
- 6:23Speaker 1: that they're from the Ukraine. They're like, I just moved
- 6:25Speaker 1: here from Yukua, just moved here from St. Petersburg, Ukraine.
- 6:29Speaker 1: I mean the kief.
- 6:32Speaker 4: Lyon assholes, lyon asses.
- 6:34Speaker 1: But uh yeah, you can't trust them. Or you also
- 6:37Speaker 1: can't trust people who hit you up online. They're like, dude,
- 6:39Speaker 1: you gotta let me cut your hair.
- 6:41Speaker 4: I've never had that.
- 6:42Speaker 7: I have you got that? Yeah, it's like, freak, why
- 6:44Speaker 7: do you want your hands on my hair so bad?
- 6:46Speaker 4: They probably just want you to promote the I had
- 6:48Speaker 4: the barber that I went to that I think I
- 6:50Speaker 4: was the only person that ever went to this barber.
- 6:52Speaker 4: The the entire shop was the size of a bathroom
- 6:56Speaker 4: and there was one chair and uh. And the dude
- 7:00Speaker 4: was like, uh, I see. Uh. First of all, he
- 7:03Speaker 4: was shitting on Dave's pizza reviews to me like.
- 7:06Speaker 7: Not knowing you, no, weal? I told him that worked
- 7:08Speaker 7: about it funny if it was just on his mind.
- 7:10Speaker 1: Yeah, what nationality are you about to do?
- 7:13Speaker 4: I don't know what nationality?
- 7:14Speaker 7: He was not offensive.
- 7:16Speaker 4: I wasn't going to do a nationality. You were like,
- 7:18Speaker 4: I see, that's just how that's how I talked. I
- 7:21Speaker 4: was going to do a nationality. Well, I forget, I
- 7:23Speaker 4: don't know what he is. I don't know what he is,
- 7:24Speaker 4: so so I backed So I backed out, but he uh.
- 7:27Speaker 1: Let's make him Japanese.
- 7:28Speaker 4: Yeah, we'll make him Japanese.
- 7:29Speaker 1: So so he took out the Tory Hunzo blade.
- 7:35Speaker 4: He was asking about Dave and KFC, constantly saying they
- 7:38Speaker 4: should come get their haircut at his place. How old
- 7:40Speaker 4: was he probably sixties? How much does Dave make cool?
- 7:44Speaker 4: Do you a good boss?
- 7:46Speaker 10: Oh?
- 7:46Speaker 4: One minute man? That's literally what he was like. He
- 7:52Speaker 4: was asking a lot about one minute man, but he said, uh,
- 7:54Speaker 4: apparently Dave gave a bad review to one of his
- 7:56Speaker 4: friends pizza shops, and he was like, what gives him
- 8:00Speaker 4: the rise? What makes him be the god of pizza?
- 8:06Speaker 8: I it's the beginning of Batman.
- 8:07Speaker 4: Yeah, what makes him better than you or me? I'm
- 8:10Speaker 4: not wearing hockey pats. Tell me time whenever you feel
- 8:18Speaker 4: keep up with this.
- 8:20Speaker 7: Just an honor to watch you boys work.
- 8:23Speaker 1: Don't say that we need a three man weave.
- 8:25Speaker 4: What makes you better than me?
- 8:27Speaker 7: Because what makes you better than me?
- 8:30Speaker 4: No? No, I don't not even close to Japanese, not nearly.
- 8:33Speaker 7: But we're Japanese and Batman. We're doing little I could
- 8:37Speaker 7: do Japanese.
- 8:38Speaker 4: People really like when we do Japanese Batman Japanese. Where
- 8:44Speaker 4: is she? Where is Rachel?
- 8:52Speaker 1: I'm a not a dog hero that the city wants.
- 8:57Speaker 4: I am not wearing hockey pads.
- 8:59Speaker 7: First, I'll break your that's Japanese pain.
- 9:01Speaker 4: Chinese first, to break your spirit. That was Chinese, And
- 9:06Speaker 4: that was just straight up racist. We're all doing a
- 9:08Speaker 4: very sis.
- 9:11Speaker 7: I would break your spirit and then your body.
- 9:13Speaker 4: Now to cut that.
- 9:14Speaker 8: You don't know anything about Japanese culture.
- 9:16Speaker 1: Now, I know a lot like what.
- 9:19Speaker 7: Sushi is. The first sushi is the first thing.
- 9:22Speaker 4: That came to my mind racist due about sucking that
- 9:25Speaker 4: baseball gyro dreams of sushi about the.
- 9:27Speaker 1: Baseball player said on another show that sushi is.
- 9:35Speaker 4: Italian.
- 9:37Speaker 7: I'm just so naturally talked with a heavy Italian slip in.
- 9:42Speaker 1: A lot of people don't know that Gabba ghoul is
- 9:44Speaker 1: capa cola. Oh I knew that, I said, a lot
- 9:47Speaker 1: of people don't know that. Obviously, you, as a diop
- 9:50Speaker 1: guinea would know that.
- 9:51Speaker 7: Well easy, I mean, for I guess you're allowed to sass.
- 9:58Speaker 1: On the other hand, couldn't say it. But he has
- 9:59Speaker 1: one word that we can't say.
- 10:01Speaker 4: I don't think I'm allowed to say that word either.
- 10:03Speaker 4: Yeah you are, No, I'm not the K word. I'm
- 10:05Speaker 4: half Jewish, were you No? I don't understand what people
- 10:09Speaker 4: don't understand about this. People constantly ask me. Muk asked
- 10:12Speaker 4: me the other day if I celebrate Christmas. I was
- 10:15Speaker 4: affirmed in the Catholic Church. Yeah, so you're just I
- 10:19Speaker 4: just told the people one day that my dad is Jewish,
- 10:22Speaker 4: And now everyone suddenly is like, why don't you wear
- 10:24Speaker 4: a yamakin everywhere?
- 10:25Speaker 7: Why haven't you condemned to aren't you putting? I stand
- 10:30Speaker 7: with israel stories.
- 10:31Speaker 4: I'm not actually Jewish, I'm ethnically part Jewish.
- 10:35Speaker 7: You're Israeli. You're not Jewish or Israeli.
- 10:38Speaker 1: Where do you stand on the on the Penn president
- 10:42Speaker 1: that had to step down, that'll determine how Jewish you are?
- 10:45Speaker 4: Brother, I stand with reverence, and now stands with.
- 10:51Speaker 1: They really should. Oh well this was weeks ago, stated.
- 10:53Speaker 7: Yeah, I was just gonna say that the war might
- 10:55Speaker 7: even be over by now, or might have gotten like
- 10:58Speaker 7: considerably worse.
- 11:00Speaker 1: Holiday he might be dead. It says you have to
- 11:04Speaker 1: put this out somehow. You need to schedule this. I now,
- 11:07Speaker 1: you just schedule this like a fucking a bomb, or
- 11:10Speaker 1: like have it scheduled every day, and you need to
- 11:12Speaker 1: put in like a password so it doesn't come out
- 11:15Speaker 1: like some very sensitive information. Shit is sensitive information.
- 11:19Speaker 4: It's sensitive, so sensitive, so sensitive.
- 11:23Speaker 1: So they really put the press on you to move
- 11:24Speaker 1: out here.
- 11:25Speaker 7: Yeah, every week that I'm not here, every week I'm
- 11:28Speaker 7: me names big T.
- 11:31Speaker 1: I got a question, how come you have been coming
- 11:33Speaker 1: out Advisor and what do you do on that show?
- 11:37Speaker 7: Give stats? Give stats to the people?
- 11:38Speaker 1: How many words do you think you say a week?
- 11:42Speaker 7: Five stats? Uh?
- 11:45Speaker 4: For a money around around one hundred for a money
- 11:48Speaker 4: standpoint from the company. Wouldn't it make more sense to
- 11:50Speaker 4: just film your.
- 11:51Speaker 7: Part in now? It's different when I'm in the room,
- 11:53Speaker 7: the magic, the chemistry that we have in the room.
- 11:55Speaker 8: Well, do you ever like answer back to somebody.
- 11:58Speaker 7: And yeah, yeah, yeah, someone doesn't watch it, but you know,
- 12:01Speaker 7: I'm not my ch I know my place.
- 12:02Speaker 4: I don't they have like they could just film their
- 12:04Speaker 4: part on like Wednesday and then film your part on Thursday.
- 12:08Speaker 7: Yeah, but it's different. Then we can't go back and forth.
- 12:11Speaker 1: We could go back and forth remotely because Dave does
- 12:14Speaker 1: a lot of his shows from other places.
- 12:16Speaker 4: I'm just thinking from a fine like from a financial
- 12:18Speaker 4: because they just responsor I would would I know there's
- 12:21Speaker 4: going to be a lot of people getting fired because
- 12:23Speaker 4: my contract was so big.
- 12:25Speaker 7: Oh congrats, yeah, three fifty Oh nice almost.
- 12:28Speaker 4: Dave's feeling generous.
- 12:29Speaker 1: Actually, it's a good time to talk to Dave right now.
- 12:31Speaker 1: Dave is like Ebenezer Scrooge. He's like Meyra Rothchild. He's
- 12:34Speaker 1: just giving out money. Really, Maya Rothschild or the head
- 12:38Speaker 1: of the roster held back online.
- 12:40Speaker 4: I didn't even come close to three fifty three twenty
- 12:43Speaker 4: five whatever. I'll deal with it.
- 12:44Speaker 8: Three sixty five thousand dollars for every day of the year.
- 12:47Speaker 4: I wonder how long I could say three fifty until
- 12:49Speaker 4: people start believing that.
- 12:50Speaker 7: Until not long, Okay, I think people believe that quick.
- 12:53Speaker 7: I hear so, I hear a rumor about somebody's salary,
- 12:55Speaker 7: and oh, I believe it forever constantly.
- 12:56Speaker 4: The best one was from what I've heard in the office.
- 12:59Speaker 4: I think Roan makes twenty million dollars a year.
- 13:01Speaker 7: Yes, I've heard that from around himself. Yeah. I took
- 13:05Speaker 7: a negotiating class. I make a million dollars a year
- 13:07Speaker 7: or to.
- 13:07Speaker 4: Lay off half the company to keep your own salary.
- 13:10Speaker 1: Yeah, But because the negotiating class took so hard, like
- 13:13Speaker 1: they didn't know what to do otherwise.
- 13:16Speaker 7: Negotiating class he did. No.
- 13:18Speaker 8: I did the what's it called the masterclass?
- 13:24Speaker 1: I got masterclass for Christmas a couple of years ago,
- 13:26Speaker 1: and I did, like the negotiating masterclass, and it's a
- 13:30Speaker 1: master class and the thing that you have to like
- 13:33Speaker 1: unsubscribe every year.
- 13:35Speaker 8: Yeah, or they're just gonna like charge you the full
- 13:37Speaker 8: Yeah the full.
- 13:38Speaker 7: Price's got a spare bedroom in Dave's Nantucket.
- 13:40Speaker 1: Man.
- 13:40Speaker 8: Oh yeah, I'm sure negotiated into it. Yeah, vision leads decision.
- 13:45Speaker 7: Who taught the class?
- 13:47Speaker 8: This like former FBI negotiator.
- 13:49Speaker 7: Really that feels like way different negotiatings. I know, please
- 13:53Speaker 7: don't murder this family.
- 13:55Speaker 4: That's much different than asking for a rap I have.
- 13:57Speaker 7: Ten thousand more dollars.
- 13:58Speaker 1: I know, it's like hostile negotiation.
- 14:01Speaker 4: It's like also, FBI and negotiators aren't the ones that
- 14:03Speaker 4: are asking for money. It's usually the terrorists that I
- 14:06Speaker 4: was asking for money.
- 14:07Speaker 8: Yeah, well he's negotiating with the terrorists, But the FBI
- 14:10Speaker 8: agent is.
- 14:10Speaker 7: Never like, how about how about fifteen thousand instead of
- 14:14Speaker 7: twenty five?
- 14:14Speaker 4: Well, THEI the United States isnt knows the negotiate with terrorists.
- 14:17Speaker 4: So this was probably a bad example.
- 14:19Speaker 8: Views So so you think that I got like a
- 14:23Speaker 8: raw deal.
- 14:23Speaker 1: In my class.
- 14:24Speaker 4: I think that's a pretty good deal.
- 14:25Speaker 1: How much was it the class? Yeah, it was a gift,
- 14:28Speaker 1: but I had to pay for it or maybe I
- 14:30Speaker 1: had to pay for the second year, or some someone
- 14:31Speaker 1: just sent you a link to sign up basically, or
- 14:36Speaker 1: I think I have maybe the first year I got
- 14:37Speaker 1: for free, but I have I've like have forgotten to
- 14:40Speaker 1: unsubscribe for the last two years, and so I would
- 14:42Speaker 1: always like, I probably have an alarm in my phone
- 14:44Speaker 1: for like the last day of the year to unsubscribe.
- 14:46Speaker 1: But the alarm will come up and I'll be doing
- 14:48Speaker 1: something that means absolutely nothing, and I'll just swipe up
- 14:51Speaker 1: on the only you.
- 14:51Speaker 7: Need it when when your contracts up again.
- 14:53Speaker 4: I just went through my phone. I just went through
- 14:55Speaker 4: my phone the other day and canceled a bunch of
- 14:57Speaker 4: subscriptions shit that I've never used that I'm still being
- 14:59Speaker 4: charged for.
- 15:00Speaker 1: I got an Apple charge on my credit card the
- 15:02Speaker 1: other day for eighty six dollars something that I didn't Yeah,
- 15:05Speaker 1: but I think I trust out thirty eighty six though
- 15:09Speaker 1: eighty six is so.
- 15:10Speaker 7: Rammed though, It's got to be something that's whenever I
- 15:12Speaker 7: see an Apple charches like, it's got to be something
- 15:14Speaker 7: I didn't even know.
- 15:14Speaker 1: Or they're like you're out of storage, Like bitch, what bitch,
- 15:19Speaker 1: you're the storage? Yes, Okay, Tommy that's that's why we
- 15:22Speaker 1: have a guy like Tommy on the show.
- 15:26Speaker 7: That was quick, quick, latening quick. H When do you
- 15:31Speaker 7: love seeing you guys? I love fucking seeing you guys
- 15:33Speaker 7: when you're flying back. I got a three pm flight tomorrow,
- 15:37Speaker 7: so you know, we're doing radio here tomorrow and three
- 15:39Speaker 7: pm flight, so hopefully gonna get to the Christmas party
- 15:41Speaker 7: right by the time it's turning into the eight after party?
- 15:43Speaker 4: Are you staying out here a day extra so you
- 15:45Speaker 4: can go to the after party?
- 15:47Speaker 7: Yes, No, I'm staying on here because we're doing radio tomorrow.
- 15:49Speaker 4: Oh okay, and we should we be staying here? Is
- 15:52Speaker 4: that what's happening?
- 15:53Speaker 1: What are you going to stay for the Surviving Barstool
- 15:55Speaker 1: after party for?
- 15:56Speaker 7: Is that what it's hosted by? It's hosted by me,
- 15:58Speaker 7: Chay and Hank. It's not Christmas party, No, No, it's
- 16:01Speaker 7: a Driving bar Stool after party.
- 16:03Speaker 8: Where is it at River North?
- 16:05Speaker 7: At Stool River North? Yeah, okay, I think the I
- 16:08Speaker 7: think pretty much everybody here is going to go to that.
- 16:10Speaker 7: But the graphic is just me, Chay and Hank somehow.
- 16:12Speaker 8: Yeah, it's gonna be you.
- 16:14Speaker 7: There's a graphic that fans there, I mean yeah, smoke
- 16:17Speaker 7: is on the graphic. I think there's some fucking fans there.
- 16:19Speaker 1: Damn, there's gonna be Nicky Smokes. That sounds terrible at
- 16:23Speaker 1: a table dump. You don't like your fans, No, he
- 16:27Speaker 1: doesn't like you.
- 16:27Speaker 7: Chay and hank On and who ell who else would
- 16:30Speaker 7: you rather go to an after party with.
- 16:32Speaker 4: I'm gonna go home and play video games?
- 16:34Speaker 7: Are you?
- 16:35Speaker 8: Are you have you have local baddies that you're going
- 16:37Speaker 8: to be bringing through.
- 16:38Speaker 7: No, no you can't.
- 16:39Speaker 1: You can't brings you into the beach.
- 16:41Speaker 7: Yeah, you don't bring sand to the beach.
- 16:43Speaker 4: That makes sense. You gotta tell Nicky Smokes that he
- 16:44Speaker 4: was trying to bring a girl to the Christmas party apparently.
- 16:46Speaker 7: Yeah, now you know what I'll bring. I'll bring a
- 16:48Speaker 7: fucking fishing around. See what's out there?
- 16:50Speaker 8: Truth, a stick of dynamite.
- 16:53Speaker 7: Stick of dynamite, blow the place up.
- 16:55Speaker 8: No, I'm saying fishing with dynamite easier to fish.
- 16:58Speaker 7: They blow the place up if I don't get laid.
- 17:00Speaker 1: Oh got it?
- 17:00Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah that also works.
- 17:03Speaker 7: Yeah, that's whenever whenever a woman doesn't have text me,
- 17:05Speaker 7: make get really angry at.
- 17:06Speaker 8: Her, try to fist fight her and lose.
- 17:10Speaker 7: It makes me hate all women.
- 17:11Speaker 8: But how would you know you didn't get laid to
- 17:14Speaker 8: blow up the place?
- 17:16Speaker 7: Well, like, as I'm leaving, throw it, throw it. It's like, oh,
- 17:20Speaker 7: struck out.
- 17:20Speaker 4: At the final cast? Is that like when I go
- 17:22Speaker 4: fishing and I'm like, all right, one more cast? Yeah, yeah,
- 17:25Speaker 4: all right, I'm leaving.
- 17:27Speaker 7: Yeah, on the way out, one one.
- 17:30Speaker 8: I hate to light this hot dog package of dynamite.
- 17:34Speaker 7: Scoop I called something. We call it a scoop and
- 17:36Speaker 7: score on the way out. You pick it up.
- 17:39Speaker 1: Score yeah on the at the door as the light's going.
- 17:42Speaker 7: That's not my game. I can't be a scoop and
- 17:44Speaker 7: score guy.
- 17:45Speaker 1: You're a long game guy. I saw Camille Caustic commenting
- 17:50Speaker 1: on your Instagram.
- 17:51Speaker 7: Yeah she cool, cool, we friends. Who's Camille Caustic, Gronk's wife?
- 17:56Speaker 7: Sports former Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover model ever ever.
- 18:00Speaker 4: There's like a thousand of those. There's about just handing
- 18:02Speaker 4: them out these days. I could be on the Sports
- 18:04Speaker 4: Illustrated if I want not with those fucking nipples. Sports
- 18:07Speaker 4: Illustrated for boys? Do you guys ever read that for kids?
- 18:12Speaker 7: Sports Illustrated for Kids? Swim suit?
- 18:17Speaker 1: That's what they want. But yeah, she commented on on
- 18:20Speaker 1: your rap song.
- 18:21Speaker 7: She kind yeah, I couldn't. Honestly didn't. I was like,
- 18:23Speaker 7: oh nice, and scroll past. You know what I did
- 18:25Speaker 7: not scroll past? Tyler Cameron followed me on Instagram and
- 18:28Speaker 7: now I gave an audible Tyler Cameron like the hottest
- 18:30Speaker 7: guy ever from the Bachelorette bachelor ship.
- 18:33Speaker 4: That's really cool. You should tell people about that.
- 18:34Speaker 7: I just like I just did. We'll cut it whatever.
- 18:36Speaker 7: We partied once together, so it's not even a big deal.
- 18:38Speaker 8: I think he's almost getting you.
- 18:40Speaker 7: Guys want to hear a funny story that I haven't
- 18:41Speaker 7: told anywhere else yet.
- 18:43Speaker 1: Sure, clip this, pre clip this, so you.
- 18:46Speaker 7: Know, I'm gonna try to think of how to how
- 18:49Speaker 7: to phrase this in an appropriate way. But you know,
- 18:53Speaker 7: a lot of times we get we are recognized by
- 18:55Speaker 7: people there they have a white skin, okay, right, And
- 19:00Speaker 7: you know sometimes sometimes if I'm already it's going might
- 19:04Speaker 7: be different. But a lot of times I feel like
- 19:05Speaker 7: if and if I do get recognized by by a
- 19:07Speaker 7: black guy, like it's like his white friends told him
- 19:10Speaker 7: about barstools, like the vibe that that usually I get.
- 19:13Speaker 7: But but the other night Saturday night outside of club,
- 19:16Speaker 7: waiting for the crew to arrive, and this black guy
- 19:19Speaker 7: he was really cool looking. I don't know how else
- 19:22Speaker 7: to say it. He was just a really cool I.
- 19:24Speaker 1: Look what was he wearing.
- 19:25Speaker 7: He had like a hat on. Oh shearings like a
- 19:30Speaker 7: a shirt, an unbuttoned fly like he yeah, no, I
- 19:32Speaker 7: get it. Picture cool block and picture him like in
- 19:35Speaker 7: the dictionary. And he goes smokes like like checked other
- 19:39Speaker 7: checked both ways, and I was like, he's like, yeah,
- 19:41Speaker 7: what's up. Ampig fan tapped him up. And then as
- 19:43Speaker 7: he was walking away, I turned the group. I was like,
- 19:45Speaker 7: oh my god, everybody like stay cool. And I guess
- 19:47Speaker 7: I said that too loud and he heard it and
- 19:49Speaker 7: he came back and he was like, are you just
- 19:51Speaker 7: saying that because I'm like a cool black guy. And
- 19:53Speaker 7: I was like, honestly, man, yeah, it's like usually it's
- 19:56Speaker 7: like friddy white guys. He was like, I respect that.
- 19:58Speaker 7: I respect you being honest with me. So that was
- 20:00Speaker 7: a beauty. It was maybe, Yeah, that's the story.
- 20:02Speaker 1: That's good.
- 20:03Speaker 7: Yeah, we'll cut that out. Yeah, we'll cut that out.
- 20:05Speaker 1: That's a good story.
- 20:06Speaker 8: Banchast actually have black friends though.
- 20:08Speaker 7: Yeah, we do. I have a lot. I have black
- 20:09Speaker 7: fans and fans. I have a lot of black fans.
- 20:14Speaker 7: So much of that.
- 20:15Speaker 4: I don't believe you. Every time you got recognized by
- 20:18Speaker 4: a black dude and.
- 20:18Speaker 7: It was it's it might have been an HDB team,
- 20:21Speaker 7: it might have been had to be there, had it
- 20:24Speaker 7: sounds like it had to be there the fact, it's not.
- 20:26Speaker 7: If the story was just a cool black guy recognized me,
- 20:29Speaker 7: I agree, that's not much of us. That was the
- 20:31Speaker 7: entire hearing story him hearing me freak out about it
- 20:35Speaker 7: and then back.
- 20:36Speaker 8: Yeah.
- 20:36Speaker 4: But but you you use of the story as the
- 20:39Speaker 4: cool black dude recognizing you and then you just like
- 20:42Speaker 4: brushed over it.
- 20:42Speaker 7: It's called the punchline. Brother, ever hear of it.
- 20:45Speaker 4: Yeah, it wasn't great. It needs it was working on
- 20:48Speaker 4: that One'll work on that one.
- 20:49Speaker 7: It was a late punchline. I'm coming for your stand
- 20:52Speaker 7: up crown in twenty twenty four, I might start, I
- 20:54Speaker 7: might start spinning on the mic. Up, we'll see, I
- 20:57Speaker 7: got I got the itch.
- 20:58Speaker 1: Spin on the mic.
- 20:59Speaker 8: You're coming for both of them our crowns.
- 21:01Speaker 7: Yeah, that's true. Almost a wrapping stand up comedian.
- 21:04Speaker 4: You're gonna be like you're gonna do open mics.
- 21:06Speaker 7: We'll see if I have to, I have to start there.
- 21:08Speaker 7: I'll start there.
- 21:09Speaker 8: Your problem is, though, you got to get out of
- 21:11Speaker 8: the intentionally bad.
- 21:12Speaker 1: Though, But it was good.
- 21:14Speaker 7: It was good experience to do intentionally bad why because
- 21:18Speaker 7: it got me up there on a stage stood behind
- 21:20Speaker 7: a mic.
- 21:20Speaker 4: Oh you did stand up?
- 21:22Speaker 7: I lost a bet for please end this and by
- 21:24Speaker 7: now it's probably out. I had to do stand up
- 21:26Speaker 7: written by everybody else and it was so bad. It
- 21:28Speaker 7: was intentionally bad. Mike, did we did an open mic? No,
- 21:31Speaker 7: it was a show stand up? N Why you passed there?
- 21:34Speaker 4: Yes?
- 21:36Speaker 7: And uh yeah I did. I did five minutes and
- 21:38Speaker 7: it absolutely bombed.
- 21:40Speaker 4: Like what show was? It was a like a house show.
- 21:45Speaker 7: It was like his show. And there are a couple
- 21:46Speaker 7: other comedians and you.
- 21:47Speaker 4: Did rich Voss's show.
- 21:49Speaker 7: Yeah?
- 21:50Speaker 4: Did he hate you?
- 21:52Speaker 1: I know what was going on?
- 21:54Speaker 7: He was with it? Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah? Well
- 21:56Speaker 7: what what was a really lucky break?
- 21:59Speaker 3: Is?
- 21:59Speaker 7: The day before for the show, how did you end
- 22:01Speaker 7: up on? Rich Vos posted a posted a picture of
- 22:04Speaker 7: Dave on Instagram and was like, this guy is a
- 22:07Speaker 7: fucking patriot, an American because rich Voss is Jewish, and
- 22:10Speaker 7: it was right after Dave was like, I'm not hiring
- 22:11Speaker 7: anyone from Harvard. So the timing. Thank god for those
- 22:15Speaker 7: anti Semitic teens at the Ivy League schools that helped
- 22:19Speaker 7: our timing there. That's good.
- 22:20Speaker 4: Did you just lie and say you're Jewish? I did?
- 22:23Speaker 7: I think he just assumed?
- 22:26Speaker 1: And what did you say? Were you like, how did
- 22:28Speaker 1: you contextualize it to him? I?
- 22:30Speaker 4: Actually, you gotta break this down for me, did you
- 22:33Speaker 4: cal rich Voss?
- 22:35Speaker 7: No, Caroline reached out to the club itself maybe and
- 22:37Speaker 7: they were like the show runners there were like, yeah,
- 22:40Speaker 7: we'll put you on this show, like we'll run it
- 22:42Speaker 7: by rich Voss and he was cool.
- 22:43Speaker 4: With it, okay.
- 22:44Speaker 1: And what did they say to rich Voss?
- 22:46Speaker 4: Like do you know who he is?
- 22:48Speaker 7: I do now I did not.
- 22:49Speaker 8: He won the first season of Last Comic Standing.
- 22:52Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, he's like really, he's like a really old
- 22:54Speaker 4: comedian like nod It was like him and Ralphie May
- 22:58Speaker 4: I remember him making fun of dat fan. Yeah, he
- 23:00Speaker 4: hosted Woodstock ninety nine.
- 23:03Speaker 7: Wow, So he's yeah, he's been He's been in the
- 23:04Speaker 7: game almost as long as a bout a boope.
- 23:07Speaker 4: He like, yeah, he came up with like all those
- 23:08Speaker 4: big guys like Patrese O'Neal and all that crew.
- 23:11Speaker 7: Yeah, I know. No, Rich Fross the legend on Instagram.
- 23:14Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, you know.
- 23:16Speaker 7: Yeah, you worked together before.
- 23:18Speaker 4: No, but I've like seen him at the stand a bunch.
- 23:22Speaker 4: We don't we don't typically work together.
- 23:24Speaker 7: Yeah, well we do bout a Boope and Vos dynamic.
- 23:27Speaker 1: I just don't know.
- 23:28Speaker 4: And someone it's so funny that you run a show
- 23:30Speaker 4: that you did stand up as a joke and you
- 23:32Speaker 4: run a show.
- 23:33Speaker 7: With Rich Ball he did. Afterwards, he address it or
- 23:37Speaker 7: he was like he wasn't thrilled with I don't think
- 23:39Speaker 7: he was thrilled with the turnout, Like it was like
- 23:42Speaker 7: twenty five people and then like fifteen barstool people.
- 23:45Speaker 4: Probably that sounds like stand up New York.
- 23:47Speaker 7: And he was like, uh, he was like I come.
- 23:49Speaker 7: He's like, I used to come to this show, this
- 23:51Speaker 7: just shows here and get TV auditions. Now I might
- 23:53Speaker 7: get to go on a podcast on barstools Port.
- 23:55Speaker 4: Yeah, that's kind of his whole like, yeah, shtick.
- 23:58Speaker 7: Though, making a joke on barsol podcast.
- 24:00Speaker 4: No, it's like shitting on like he's like a very
- 24:02Speaker 4: like he was.
- 24:02Speaker 7: He did a lot of crowd work Old.
- 24:04Speaker 4: Money exclusively crowd work. Yeah, he's really funny.
- 24:07Speaker 1: Yeah, he's a goat. But I just don't understand why
- 24:10Speaker 1: someone would want you want to show when you're like,
- 24:12Speaker 1: I'm going to be intentionally bad on your show.
- 24:14Speaker 4: That's what I'm That's where I'm lous, Like I could
- 24:16Speaker 4: see if it was like a house show, but like
- 24:17Speaker 4: also being rich voss'es shiit because.
- 24:19Speaker 1: People want to have like they're like, oh, like I
- 24:22Speaker 1: want to have this comic on my show because I
- 24:23Speaker 1: think they're good.
- 24:24Speaker 7: I mean, you know, it's he knew what was going on.
- 24:26Speaker 7: It's you know, he's getting all this publicity.
- 24:30Speaker 1: Yeah that's true.
- 24:31Speaker 4: Did you did you did you get any laughs?
- 24:35Speaker 3: No?
- 24:36Speaker 7: No, well at first because like at first people assume
- 24:40Speaker 7: you a comedian comes up, and you assume he's going
- 24:41Speaker 7: to say something. So like the first line or two
- 24:43Speaker 7: I said, which was not supposed to be funny, people
- 24:45Speaker 7: just laughed out of oh this is going to be funny,
- 24:48Speaker 7: like something's coming out of this guy. Yeah yeah, now
- 24:50Speaker 7: and then a long laugh like what did you say?
- 24:53Speaker 4: When you went up?
- 24:55Speaker 7: They introduced me as this is Mike about a Boope's
- 24:57Speaker 7: open for Sebasti of Maount of Scalgary's taped his new
- 24:59Speaker 7: special for Toby and I walked up and I was like, hey, guys,
- 25:02Speaker 7: rich Boss said all that. No the host?
- 25:04Speaker 4: Oh okay, I thought Rich Boss was hosting this show.
- 25:06Speaker 7: That's what he said.
- 25:07Speaker 8: He said, Rich Boss hosted.
- 25:08Speaker 4: Yeah, this is what was This is what was throwing
- 25:10Speaker 4: me off.
- 25:11Speaker 7: Well, like it was Rich Voss's show.
- 25:13Speaker 1: There was a host.
- 25:13Speaker 7: Okay, okay, there was a host who did ten, there
- 25:16Speaker 7: was me, host goes back up, girl did yeah and post.
- 25:20Speaker 4: Yeah, I get I know how it works. Yeah, yeah,
- 25:22Speaker 4: Well it doesn't seem like well because you said he
- 25:24Speaker 4: was hosted by Rich Voss.
- 25:26Speaker 7: Well whatever the fucking game? I don't know?
- 25:29Speaker 4: So did so?
- 25:32Speaker 1: So what did you say when you went on stage?
- 25:34Speaker 7: I mean, the videos out now and people can go
- 25:36Speaker 7: watch it.
- 25:37Speaker 4: But LUs as well because we haven't.
- 25:38Speaker 7: It was like, you know, the first thing is something
- 25:40Speaker 7: Mike had boot bounds to stand up for you guys tonight,
- 25:42Speaker 7: and then I put it down. He did a voice yeah, yeah, yeah,
- 25:46Speaker 7: the cross and then I was like, Mike, you about
- 25:47Speaker 7: a boot bag? Great to be here, stand up and
- 25:49Speaker 7: why how about those female comedians earlier? And there was
- 25:52Speaker 7: no female comedians earlier. I was like, they're giving me
- 25:55Speaker 7: blue balls, called me Papa Smurf and dead side. There
- 25:59Speaker 7: was an audible grown at a line where I said, like,
- 26:02Speaker 7: hooked up with the chicken Israel gave her a middle
- 26:04Speaker 7: yeast infection.
- 26:05Speaker 4: Audible grown, that's not bad, that's kind of funny.
- 26:08Speaker 7: Yeah, it was. Caroline does stand up. She's like, she's
- 26:10Speaker 7: never seen a worse bomb than that, Like, she's never
- 26:13Speaker 7: seen a crowd take less to a comedian, which is
- 26:15Speaker 7: exactly what we wanted, but it did. I was comfortable
- 26:18Speaker 7: up there, and a lot of people are saying, oh, Smokes,
- 26:20Speaker 7: you got great stage presents. Who should try it for real?
- 26:22Speaker 1: Yeah, because you were like this. But but to be fair,
- 26:24Speaker 1: I was acting, Yeah, you detached yourself from yourself.
- 26:27Speaker 7: I was acting like if I went up there with
- 26:28Speaker 7: my own jokes expecting last I'd be way more nervous.
- 26:31Speaker 1: But still, so, what's the plan for Like, is it
- 26:34Speaker 1: going to be basically Thursday thoughts that you repurpose as No.
- 26:37Speaker 7: No, that's the thing about Smokes when he's doing stand up,
- 26:40Speaker 7: it's so different. It's like I don't even want like
- 26:42Speaker 7: barstool fans there because it's not the type of human
- 26:45Speaker 7: you'd expect to hear it, like how I feel like
- 26:51Speaker 7: Amazon Prime in a couple of years an Amazon Prime
- 26:54Speaker 7: well made. What's going on there, pal?
- 26:56Speaker 4: We saw you the hockey game market.
- 26:57Speaker 1: I know you guys. I'm Ryan Whitney.
- 26:59Speaker 7: I got a drink after me. Deal Whitney, That's what
- 27:03Speaker 7: I thought.
- 27:04Speaker 2: See it fellas, I invented the thing you pigeoned Pink
- 27:07Speaker 2: Whitney for legendary moments.
- 27:10Speaker 4: Back to the show.
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- 28:21Speaker 8: Yeah, so Tommy is going to be fucking sick.
- 28:24Speaker 7: I think there's potential in me. Yeah. Yeah, you gotta
- 28:27Speaker 7: do it though, but you've got to do some crowd
- 28:29Speaker 7: here's the energetic. The longer I just talk about doing it,
- 28:31Speaker 7: the longer it exists as a possibility.
- 28:33Speaker 1: No, no, it's your opposite.
- 28:34Speaker 7: I'm afraid to fail.
- 28:36Speaker 4: It's like when I say I'm gonna start working out
- 28:38Speaker 4: and everyone's like, no, you're not. Yeah, and you said
- 28:40Speaker 4: that ten thousand times. Yeah, but I'm I'm open said
- 28:43Speaker 4: that about it. I said I was gonna quit drinking.
- 28:44Speaker 4: Look at me now, a couple of croix.
- 28:46Speaker 7: That's why I didn't golf for so good? Okay, Like
- 28:48Speaker 7: what if I'm an amazing golfer.
- 28:50Speaker 8: That's what I thought about ice hockey. I was like,
- 28:51Speaker 8: I probably am really good at ice, right.
- 28:53Speaker 7: I'll never try it, but the possibility existed for like
- 28:56Speaker 7: twenty four years ice ice hockey, god at golf what?
- 29:00Speaker 4: But no one's really naturally good at stand up?
- 29:03Speaker 7: I disagree it.
- 29:05Speaker 10: Now.
- 29:05Speaker 1: It's like you're just not Pat McAfee.
- 29:09Speaker 4: But if Pat, there's difference between Pat McAfee doing stand
- 29:11Speaker 4: up in front of a theater of his face.
- 29:13Speaker 7: What do you mean by naturally?
- 29:14Speaker 4: I think there's people who are either like the best
- 29:16Speaker 4: natural comedians the first time doing stand up they still
- 29:19Speaker 4: are Oh.
- 29:20Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, yeah that's fair.
- 29:21Speaker 4: Yeah.
- 29:21Speaker 7: But I'm saying like there's people who I think can
- 29:24Speaker 7: and can't. Yeah, there's people who are naturally like have
- 29:27Speaker 7: it within them, and people.
- 29:28Speaker 4: Who yeah, definitely.
- 29:30Speaker 1: And you say you're saying that you got it, Oh
- 29:31Speaker 1: I got.
- 29:32Speaker 4: It in all right, we'll say, yeah, maybe I support it.
- 29:37Speaker 4: I can tell you where to go to open mics. Yeah,
- 29:39Speaker 4: they'd probably be doing them soon enough.
- 29:41Speaker 7: Yeah. Why are we getting a SaaS special ten.
- 29:45Speaker 4: Years from now?
- 29:46Speaker 1: Seven years?
- 29:46Speaker 4: Seven years? Yeah? Seven years?
- 29:48Speaker 7: Really? Yeah, I'm thinking I was thinking by twenty twenty
- 29:51Speaker 7: six special. I'm working quick, like I mean I started rapping,
- 29:56Speaker 7: released an album maybe a week later, like I work fast.
- 29:59Speaker 7: Now there's no I don't. I don't put in the grind.
- 30:03Speaker 4: Oh you're done.
- 30:03Speaker 7: Oh that's it, okay.
- 30:05Speaker 1: Oh but we had to cut that little bit.
- 30:07Speaker 4: Yeah true, get back in here. I would like to.
- 30:12Speaker 4: I mean, dude, you should try it. You should give
- 30:13Speaker 4: it a go.
- 30:14Speaker 7: I'm going to and I've said it going into twenty twenty.
- 30:17Speaker 7: I was a few years later.
- 30:18Speaker 3: I was.
- 30:19Speaker 4: I was in the last time I didn't open mic.
- 30:21Speaker 4: We were at the office and it was during Barstool
- 30:23Speaker 4: Idol twenty two. Yeah, and I was ring there and
- 30:26Speaker 4: I know I was doing the roast battle.
- 30:28Speaker 7: Yeah you hope you mc or you hosted a roast battle.
- 30:32Speaker 4: Oh shit, I forgot about that. That was terrible. That
- 30:34Speaker 4: was the worst mom I've ever had by a mile.
- 30:36Speaker 7: I thought you were a phone. No, that was a crowd.
- 30:39Speaker 7: The crowd did not.
- 30:41Speaker 4: But oh, I've told that story before.
- 30:43Speaker 7: I feel like I was on this podcast.
- 30:45Speaker 4: Yeah, I've told that story. When I was at I
- 30:48Speaker 4: went to the show and they were like, are you
- 30:50Speaker 4: here for the roast battle? Oh you didn't know what
- 30:51Speaker 4: I was like, are we talking about? And then I
- 30:53Speaker 4: went up and they're like, you're cold opening, and I
- 30:55Speaker 4: had to go up and just start with material and
- 30:57Speaker 4: it's all people who are just expecting a roast battle.
- 30:59Speaker 4: And I did my first year and this like eighty
- 31:01Speaker 4: year old black lady to the to the right of
- 31:03Speaker 4: the stage just goes tough crowd. I was just I
- 31:11Speaker 4: was and Tommy's in the back. I'm sweating.
- 31:14Speaker 1: Yeah, you were, literally I was.
- 31:15Speaker 7: I was on safe.
- 31:15Speaker 10: I don't remember why.
- 31:16Speaker 7: I was just like, yeah, go see your show. That's
- 31:18Speaker 7: what me and Sassy and seriously New Year's I was losing.
- 31:19Speaker 7: Me and Sass hanging out a lot.
- 31:20Speaker 4: That was like I did like six minutes that day. Yeah,
- 31:23Speaker 4: it's like it's a very quick set.
- 31:25Speaker 1: You got to come over and watch ball sometime.
- 31:27Speaker 4: Yeah, we've been watching a lot of ball. But you're
- 31:28Speaker 4: not really a ball guy.
- 31:29Speaker 7: Oh NBA ball, God, no football. Hold the biggest football
- 31:34Speaker 7: guy in the world, you're not. I'm a bigger I'm
- 31:36Speaker 7: bigger a football other. Yeah. Are you on a barstool?
- 31:38Speaker 7: Sports advisors giving out stats and trends every week? Dude?
- 31:41Speaker 4: Anyone could give up stats US football stats.
- 31:44Speaker 7: Yeah. Yeah, if that's what you think I do, you're crazy.
- 31:47Speaker 7: I have a subscription to a fucking data base where
- 31:49Speaker 7: I build them all.
- 31:50Speaker 4: I all I see is the Barstool Advisors picks.
- 31:53Speaker 7: Losing constantly is not May thirty and twenty four this year?
- 31:56Speaker 4: Damn really on straight and oh and and I think we.
- 31:58Speaker 7: Talked about this last time. I was my CBS Sports
- 32:01Speaker 7: Pool one hundred of us first place right now through
- 32:04Speaker 7: the year against the spread. Daniel Toci's on my ass
- 32:07Speaker 7: puts Cabelli's in first.
- 32:08Speaker 1: Yeah, but in our fantasy football league that we're in,
- 32:11Speaker 1: neither of us made the playoffs.
- 32:12Speaker 7: I should have. I had a lot of points.
- 32:13Speaker 4: I didn't make the playoffs, and I don't.
- 32:15Speaker 1: Make the playoffs in the league that we're in. I'm
- 32:17Speaker 1: in so many leagues. I'm in eight leagues.
- 32:19Speaker 7: That's pathetic.
- 32:19Speaker 4: I wish I was in them any.
- 32:21Speaker 7: Just too many.
- 32:21Speaker 1: I have that many friend groups.
- 32:23Speaker 7: I just don't. I think it's like I want, I
- 32:24Speaker 7: want to put it all in one in one.
- 32:26Speaker 1: I'm only two public leagues and everyone else's friend groups.
- 32:29Speaker 1: So six leagues with friend groups.
- 32:30Speaker 7: Were two public leagues, like random people on the end.
- 32:32Speaker 4: He does drafts in July, mock drafts in July.
- 32:35Speaker 7: Oh, I don't mind mock draft, no full dress.
- 32:38Speaker 1: I don't even do the max. So I'm just like, okay,
- 32:39Speaker 1: this is my team for the year.
- 32:41Speaker 7: Maybe did one I love of the game?
- 32:43Speaker 1: Do you know the game?
- 32:43Speaker 4: Tell me when you bet? When you said you were
- 32:45Speaker 4: thirty thirty eight and twenty four, thirty and twenty four,
- 32:48Speaker 4: so only six units above five hundred, that's probably like
- 32:51Speaker 4: one unit above five hundred. Do you bet straight or
- 32:54Speaker 4: do parlays straight?
- 32:56Speaker 7: I do straight. I mean there's occasion now do a parlor,
- 32:58Speaker 7: but that record is is straight razy? I can't, but
- 33:01Speaker 7: I mean, but we're talking. I've picked every game against
- 33:03Speaker 7: the spread this year. I think I'm bet now like
- 33:04Speaker 7: sixty percent in that pool. That's nothing to scoff at.
- 33:07Speaker 4: Absolutely, what is a betting You keep on talking about
- 33:10Speaker 4: this betting competition? What even is that? It's just whoever?
- 33:12Speaker 1: So that's I'm in another betting competition. But I crapped
- 33:15Speaker 1: out of that because I did too many parlays. Parlays,
- 33:17Speaker 1: Fuck you, they're the best. I would like parlay all
- 33:19Speaker 1: the games against one game, so if the one game lost,
- 33:22Speaker 1: I'd lose all my ship for the week. Like I
- 33:23Speaker 1: was in first place Week two. Dropped down and was
- 33:26Speaker 1: out of the fucking competition by a week.
- 33:28Speaker 7: And you're in bet I'm in a It's like on
- 33:31Speaker 7: CBS Sports where it's like one hundred hundred people. You
- 33:33Speaker 7: just got to pick the spread forever game.
- 33:35Speaker 4: Oh you don't actually have to bet it? No I do,
- 33:38Speaker 4: but yeah, you don't actually have to do.
- 33:39Speaker 8: Tom's coming to a Sixers game too.
- 33:41Speaker 7: Yeah, we're gonna cash the invite to that to what Sixers?
- 33:45Speaker 4: Some Celtics man in Philly.
- 33:47Speaker 7: Wait with Friday, January fifth, I like to root for good.
- 33:50Speaker 7: Brone called me up. He said, me and my friends
- 33:52Speaker 7: are going to a Sixers game. We got a box.
- 33:53Speaker 7: You want to come here? The first person I'm asking, damn?
- 33:55Speaker 4: Really, Yeah, that's cool.
- 34:00Speaker 1: I'll be there because I knew he knew.
- 34:02Speaker 4: First guy is there the first time going to a
- 34:03Speaker 4: game in a box?
- 34:05Speaker 7: No, I used to be a beat reporter.
- 34:08Speaker 1: So the press box.
- 34:09Speaker 7: Yeah, I.
- 34:11Speaker 8: Forgot to tell you, Tommy that that is not free.
- 34:14Speaker 8: What I mean, like, we're all paying our share of
- 34:18Speaker 8: the box.
- 34:19Speaker 7: How much would that be?
- 34:20Speaker 8: I mean we could probably pro rate it for you.
- 34:22Speaker 1: If you don't feel comfortable.
- 34:23Speaker 7: You made it seem like it's got to be like
- 34:25Speaker 7: you definitely made it seem like it was free to
- 34:27Speaker 7: be clear, but oh it was. It was like, I'm
- 34:30Speaker 7: inviting you to this box. We all got a box.
- 34:33Speaker 1: Yeah, we're all doing it. We're all doing it together.
- 34:36Speaker 7: How much would it be? I mean, yeah, I could
- 34:37Speaker 7: I could throw I could throw that.
- 34:38Speaker 1: We could pro rate it. We could pro rate it
- 34:40Speaker 1: for you.
- 34:41Speaker 8: I'm gonna knock a little bit off for you can.
- 34:43Speaker 4: How much is it?
- 34:44Speaker 8: Four hundred fifty dollars?
- 34:48Speaker 7: Two hundred fifty fifty?
- 34:49Speaker 1: Okay, fifty fifty The part of the deal, if.
- 34:52Speaker 4: You're gonna be there and everyone's gonna be looking at
- 34:54Speaker 4: you like that's the guy that we all have to
- 34:55Speaker 4: ship for money.
- 34:57Speaker 7: I'm not convinced you serious.
- 34:59Speaker 4: I feel like I am because you I am because
- 35:03Speaker 4: I assume, like, did the NBA players get free.
- 35:05Speaker 7: To he hosts a show with a guy on this.
- 35:09Speaker 4: Hard Knocks dude, Tyree Tyreek Kill's mom.
- 35:12Speaker 7: I love Hard Knocks is so good, dude.
- 35:15Speaker 4: The NFL players don't get like fox Sits yeah.
- 35:18Speaker 7: In my in my pretend that Joe Burrow does. He
- 35:21Speaker 7: gave it to Jake Browning.
- 35:22Speaker 4: It's his box, correct, it's his personal Bom.
- 35:24Speaker 7: You don't think you don't think that's comped. No, no,
- 35:27Speaker 7: it's absolutely. You don't think Joe Burrow when his contract
- 35:29Speaker 7: has a box for his fanw I would bet anything.
- 35:33Speaker 7: I bet your life on it, all right, I bet
- 35:36Speaker 7: your life on it. Absolutely, you don't think Joe. You
- 35:38Speaker 7: don't think that. You think the Bengals are like, hey,
- 35:41Speaker 7: Joe Burrow, pay us fucking.
- 35:42Speaker 4: Dud, mom and girlfriend have to sit in like fucking
- 35:46Speaker 4: the like.
- 35:47Speaker 7: I think it's different quarterback VERSU wide receiver, especially a
- 35:50Speaker 7: quarterback who just got a contract.
- 35:52Speaker 4: Can't you watch the Dolphins game when Tyreek Hill was
- 35:55Speaker 4: out for like one quarter without him.
- 35:58Speaker 7: I'm just saying, I'm talking the quarterback that doesn't matter.
- 36:01Speaker 7: I'm talking like, you give your franchise guy your quarterback.
- 36:04Speaker 7: Here's a maho. You think fucking Patrick Mahomes Taylor Taylor,
- 36:08Speaker 7: like Taylor Swift is paying to go to that box?
- 36:09Speaker 1: Yes, brother, you stupid so, but that I mean even
- 36:14Speaker 1: with that in mind, I'm not getting a free box.
- 36:19Speaker 4: I'm not fucking Tyreek Hill or Joe Burrow.
- 36:21Speaker 1: Can we go?
- 36:22Speaker 7: Can we go talk to the players before the game
- 36:24Speaker 7: field passes?
- 36:25Speaker 4: Yeah?
- 36:25Speaker 7: We got court. I mean I'm gonna be in the building.
- 36:28Speaker 7: I'm not gonna see peeb.
- 36:30Speaker 8: Yeah you'll we'll find a way for you to see PB.
- 36:32Speaker 1: We'll get there early.
- 36:33Speaker 7: Maybe you could locker room.
- 36:36Speaker 4: Go to the locker room.
- 36:37Speaker 1: I'll give you my maybe I'll hang my press all
- 36:40Speaker 1: behind my media passed around your neck. Perfect, and so
- 36:43Speaker 1: you can go down courtside. Go go in the bows
- 36:46Speaker 1: of the stadium and all that pressure room. Yeah, talk
- 36:49Speaker 1: to the coach.
- 36:49Speaker 7: Been there, done that.
- 36:51Speaker 1: Okay, so that's nothing new for you. Family room. Have
- 36:53Speaker 1: you been in the family room? Now the family room?
- 36:55Speaker 1: Then we could probably get you in the family room.
- 36:57Speaker 1: We'll just sneak you in there.
- 36:59Speaker 4: But like family, I went to the family room and
- 37:00Speaker 4: met life. Don't worry about it.
- 37:04Speaker 7: Clay Aiken, Yeah, where are you staying when you go
- 37:08Speaker 7: to Philly that night?
- 37:09Speaker 4: Driving home after.
- 37:12Speaker 7: You're answering for him?
- 37:13Speaker 4: Yeah, I just know his schedule.
- 37:14Speaker 7: I think I thought he said he was staying the weekend.
- 37:16Speaker 4: Staying the weekend, I don't know.
- 37:18Speaker 7: I'm driving home after Yeah, getting tipsy.
- 37:22Speaker 4: No, I can't go. No, I'm busy that weekends.
- 37:24Speaker 8: Why I didn't invite you.
- 37:26Speaker 4: I'm not a ball guy. I don't like basketballs. I
- 37:29Speaker 4: find it to be incredibly boring.
- 37:31Speaker 7: I love it.
- 37:33Speaker 1: I know you were just staying in the corner and
- 37:34Speaker 1: fucking not talk to anybody anyway.
- 37:36Speaker 4: No, I like I like watching the last quarter of
- 37:38Speaker 4: basketball games.
- 37:39Speaker 8: I know that Tommy is a social butterfly.
- 37:41Speaker 4: I also like playoff. I like when the Celtics are
- 37:42Speaker 4: doing well in the playoff.
- 37:43Speaker 7: I think I'll perform a while in that box.
- 37:44Speaker 1: Hopefully you're gonna fucking shine. Yeah, and you're not gonna.
- 37:47Speaker 8: And it's six Ers Nicks. He's a Knicks fan.
- 37:50Speaker 7: No, I'll over for the for those six Ers.
- 37:53Speaker 1: We could root for the next.
- 37:53Speaker 8: It doesn't matter.
- 37:54Speaker 4: Ye, I'm just room for Celtics play each other anytime.
- 37:57Speaker 1: Well, me and Dave go to those games. Sorry, Dave,
- 38:01Speaker 1: I'm going to the game with sas.
- 38:02Speaker 10: Yeah.
- 38:03Speaker 7: Have you been in a box with David a game before?
- 38:05Speaker 4: I've never I've never even really been with Dave ever.
- 38:07Speaker 8: Oh, Tom's been over Dave's house. Yeah, like a bunch.
- 38:14Speaker 7: Yeah.
- 38:14Speaker 4: Yeah, what do you guys do when that happens?
- 38:16Speaker 7: Watch sports, Watch Survivor, order Chicken, charaokee bulls, just you
- 38:20Speaker 7: and him. Yeah, it's happened before.
- 38:22Speaker 1: You guys watched it.
- 38:22Speaker 7: He thinks he thinks we're fucking with him. Now, yeah,
- 38:25Speaker 7: I mean this was like during the gambling run.
- 38:27Speaker 4: But yeah, you know all this getting caught. We already
- 38:29Speaker 4: caught you at twenty seven.
- 38:29Speaker 7: No, no, no, this has got to stay. It's a
- 38:31Speaker 7: twenty seven minutes with Tommy.
- 38:32Speaker 4: What is this?
- 38:32Speaker 7: A girl and me having sex three times?
- 38:36Speaker 8: What does this me and a girl having sex nine times?
- 38:38Speaker 7: Yeah?
- 38:39Speaker 8: Either one was there, Either one was there for nine
- 38:41Speaker 8: is a little bit funnier.
- 38:42Speaker 4: Nine would have been way funnier or once.
- 38:44Speaker 8: I think I think twenty seven times cocky thing.
- 38:48Speaker 4: If you said once, it would have made more sense
- 38:49Speaker 4: for your character.
- 38:50Speaker 7: Or like fifty characters. I'm not a character.
- 38:53Speaker 1: You are?
- 38:54Speaker 4: You said that.
- 38:54Speaker 8: You said that on Barceol radio the other day.
- 38:56Speaker 7: I'm not a character.
- 38:57Speaker 8: Yeah, he admitted that he's Yeah.
- 38:58Speaker 7: No, no, no, I admitted that I can't tell anymore.
- 39:01Speaker 7: So I'm not a character.
- 39:02Speaker 8: You can't tell if you're where the character ends and where.
- 39:04Speaker 4: You're schizophrenic I might be, or do you have like
- 39:07Speaker 4: multiple personality disorder?
- 39:09Speaker 7: No, seriously, everyone who knows what from I'm a really
- 39:12Speaker 7: good guy.
- 39:13Speaker 1: You sound like the Japanese Harvey Dent kind of all,
- 39:19Speaker 1: I don't know what, you only do Chinese accents?
- 39:22Speaker 7: What is then?
- 39:23Speaker 1: I'm gonna says, well, you're a big but you guys
- 39:28Speaker 1: were watching The Vivor together.
- 39:29Speaker 7: The Survivor was on that night we put it on.
- 39:31Speaker 1: Yeah, damn.
- 39:34Speaker 8: So he thought he was gonna mop up and surviving barstool.
- 39:36Speaker 4: Me and Dave have been playing Fortnite together. Yeah, yeah,
- 39:39Speaker 4: he didn't want to play the OG, but once the
- 39:41Speaker 4: new map came out, he's been like grinding it.
- 39:43Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean that's fucking Dave. He gets into something,
- 39:45Speaker 7: he grinds it.
- 39:46Speaker 4: Yeah, of course, what was the honest guy?
- 39:48Speaker 1: Now he's got the mister Portnoy's skin, he's got the
- 39:52Speaker 1: people's lawyer skin.
- 39:55Speaker 4: All right, Well, time to go on to bigger and
- 39:58Speaker 4: better things.
- 39:59Speaker 7: So I was first for this episode? Oh I was first?
- 40:01Speaker 7: Or second? I'm firs.
- 40:02Speaker 4: I don't know that. Are we even doing second?
- 40:05Speaker 1: I don't know.
- 40:06Speaker 8: Should we just finish off with Tommy?
- 40:07Speaker 7: We could do that. What is the sex with? Like
- 40:12Speaker 7: back to the twenty seven minutes then?
- 40:13Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess it's kind of the twenty seven minutes
- 40:15Speaker 1: thing because I texted a big cat he didn't text
- 40:18Speaker 1: me back.
- 40:18Speaker 4: What time is it?
- 40:20Speaker 1: Oh?
- 40:20Speaker 4: Yeah, he's doing that.
- 40:21Speaker 7: You're not to move Chicago?
- 40:23Speaker 1: Who isn't?
- 40:24Speaker 7: Yeah, saying Big Cat didn't text you back.
- 40:26Speaker 4: Yeah, fuck that sucks, dude, me you can't pulled me aside.
- 40:30Speaker 4: And he said, pick three employees, will fire them and
- 40:33Speaker 4: will give them your salary, will give you their salary.
- 40:37Speaker 7: Now I put that together.
- 40:39Speaker 4: I picked Tommy, Rudy and Caroline. Damn competition, WAMU.
- 40:45Speaker 1: I would have picked three highly paid employees.
- 40:50Speaker 4: All right, best we can do is a dunk a
- 40:51Speaker 4: Donuts gift card?
- 40:53Speaker 7: Who else? Who would I'm trying to think who I'd take?
- 40:56Speaker 4: If you if it, if it meant you would absorb
- 40:57Speaker 4: their salaryeah, yeah yeah obviously anso be like Big Cat.
- 41:01Speaker 7: But it's a big Cat company so much, but you
- 41:03Speaker 7: would make Yeah that's true. I want to what one
- 41:07Speaker 7: year with Big Cat's salary, I'm sick.
- 41:08Speaker 4: Yeah, I would retire.
- 41:09Speaker 8: But his Yeah, I don't think he's that.
- 41:11Speaker 1: I don't think he's a big salt, big salary. I
- 41:13Speaker 1: think he's big equity.
- 41:14Speaker 4: Yeah that's true.
- 41:15Speaker 7: I not got the acuity too, I know. But it's
- 41:17Speaker 7: like I bety, like you could do huh, I bet
- 41:19Speaker 7: he makes a little more than we do.
- 41:21Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree with that, but I'm saying you could
- 41:23Speaker 1: keep him around and benefit off of it while taking
- 41:27Speaker 1: out people who have maybe closer salaries that that aren't
- 41:32Speaker 1: in your orbit at all.
- 41:32Speaker 8: Yeah true, Like well Kelly in Vegas.
- 41:38Speaker 7: She doesn't work here anymore. Already I already absorbed that one.
- 41:41Speaker 8: Up her six hundred thousand?
- 41:44Speaker 4: Is that how much he was getting paid? That was
- 41:45Speaker 4: a rumor, That was a fucking that's what Those are
- 41:48Speaker 4: always my favorite ones. When people just list a random
- 41:50Speaker 4: employee and they're like, seven hundred k a year.
- 41:53Speaker 8: Coach Dougs is making eight hundred thousand dollars.
- 41:56Speaker 4: Coach Dougs is making he's actually getting equity, just him
- 42:00Speaker 4: and the Milton guys. And then you're like, no, are
- 42:04Speaker 4: you fucking kidding me? I used to get so mad
- 42:07Speaker 4: when I would hear shit like that, But something h
- 42:09Speaker 4: Q four though. It's no gossip, no gossip, No, it's
- 42:12Speaker 4: just good vibes. It's just good vibes.
- 42:14Speaker 7: You gotta have me over.
- 42:15Speaker 4: We're not talking gossip at HP.
- 42:17Speaker 7: Me over sometimes.
- 42:18Speaker 4: Are you still in the area.
- 42:19Speaker 7: Yes, we look at your address, walks away from each other.
- 42:21Speaker 1: How can we never hang out if you guys live
- 42:23Speaker 1: so close, like sass will come to Brooklyn and hang
- 42:25Speaker 1: out with me?
- 42:25Speaker 4: No, he doesn't half twice in the last month.
- 42:28Speaker 7: Okay, sick invite? Yeah, can we get a dinner together?
- 42:34Speaker 7: Why can't we get as an asshole the better comedian
- 42:39Speaker 7: than you'll ever be, probably yeah, uh yeah, let's get
- 42:42Speaker 7: a dinner.
- 42:43Speaker 1: Separate from me and your dinner, Tommy.
- 42:45Speaker 7: Yeah, separate from me and your dinner, and.
- 42:46Speaker 4: Separate from me and your dinner, says I don't know
- 42:47Speaker 4: if you know this, but I don't really drink anymore,
- 42:49Speaker 4: so like my priorities have more been focused on, like production.
- 42:52Speaker 1: But he didn't say get a drown does.
- 42:53Speaker 7: Get a dinner? If you were mine on I goes
- 42:55Speaker 7: to drinks with dinner. That's your problem, not mom, brother.
- 42:57Speaker 4: Yeah, that is my problem. That's why I'm not drinking any.
- 42:59Speaker 7: I mean, I'll drink it that dinner I'll thrown back.
- 43:01Speaker 8: Yeah, we got it.
- 43:02Speaker 7: I love to drink.
- 43:03Speaker 1: What are you talking about? Wine or cocktails?
- 43:06Speaker 7: Cocktails? Well, it depends.
- 43:07Speaker 4: Beer's out, oh, beers, So people not drinking beers these days? Yes, out,
- 43:11Speaker 4: it's crazy, it's fully out.
- 43:12Speaker 8: Ever since me stop drinking beer.
- 43:14Speaker 4: When we were doing the when we were doing the
- 43:15Speaker 4: Christmas thing last night, my body was like pulsating with
- 43:18Speaker 4: the thought of having a mook. Was drinking those frozen
- 43:22Speaker 4: cores lights the mountains bluer than ever.
- 43:24Speaker 1: It look good to you.
- 43:25Speaker 4: I wanted one so bad.
- 43:26Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's so unhealthy.
- 43:28Speaker 3: I know.
- 43:29Speaker 7: Are you off drinking entirely?
- 43:31Speaker 4: Yeah, twenty one days? Why because I'm an alcoholic.
- 43:36Speaker 7: Like we're drinking a lot?
- 43:37Speaker 4: Yes, gotcha?
- 43:38Speaker 7: Yeah, I mean so. I always feel like I'm.
- 43:40Speaker 4: Not really though, yes, really I don't. Everyone always said
- 43:43Speaker 4: they're like, dude, you're twenty two. You weren't drinking. I
- 43:45Speaker 4: was drinking, Like when I would go out, I would
- 43:46Speaker 4: drink like, well, over fifteen beers, sometimes over twenty beers.
- 43:51Speaker 7: See I drink often, But when I drink, I feel
- 43:54Speaker 7: like I don't want fifteen beers. But I think I
- 43:57Speaker 7: was doing the man. I think I've drank more days
- 43:58Speaker 7: than I haven't this year, which does him like a lot.
- 44:01Speaker 4: Yeah, but if you don't do it, if you do
- 44:02Speaker 4: it in moderation, like if you can go out and
- 44:04Speaker 4: drink like three beers, that's not like.
- 44:06Speaker 7: Who goes I'm having more, you know, cocktails.
- 44:09Speaker 4: Yeah, but then I'll still three cocktails. Who cares like
- 44:12Speaker 4: I would like? I went home for Thanksgiving on Wednesday,
- 44:14Speaker 4: like the day before Thanksgiving, and I was like, I'm
- 44:16Speaker 4: not doing anything today, like I'm not going to go
- 44:17Speaker 4: out and like see people from home. And then I
- 44:20Speaker 4: went to my friend's house and I was like, I'm
- 44:21Speaker 4: just gonna go over and hang out and then like
- 44:23Speaker 4: leave before they go to the bars.
- 44:25Speaker 7: And then I just don't want to soak up.
- 44:26Speaker 4: Blacked out, completely blacked out.
- 44:29Speaker 7: You don't want that drank like forty beers.
- 44:32Speaker 1: That's why he drinks forty beers because he goes out
- 44:34Speaker 1: in Duxbury and people are swarming him.
- 44:36Speaker 8: As a Duckberry tavernse true.
- 44:38Speaker 1: He goes to the Duckbury Inn and people are fucking
- 44:41Speaker 1: loading up on him. Dude, let me buy you an
- 44:43Speaker 1: espresso martini. And he has eight espresso martinis and fucking
- 44:47Speaker 1: drives his head through a plate glass window. Just hopped up.
- 44:50Speaker 4: I was the worst part that I drove home.
- 44:52Speaker 7: Oh, I mean, yeah, I did not drive home.
- 44:56Speaker 1: I also gonna get home as no experiencing walk Doxbury architects.
- 45:00Speaker 4: I'd say take an uber, and my dad didn't believe me.
- 45:03Speaker 7: Did you think you?
- 45:04Speaker 6: Like?
- 45:04Speaker 4: He was like, what are you talking? He's like, where
- 45:05Speaker 4: did you get in? There's no ubers here. I did
- 45:08Speaker 4: uber though, but.
- 45:09Speaker 1: There are ubers all over New England. I got an
- 45:12Speaker 1: uber at a coastal fucking Rhode Island town or coastal
- 45:16Speaker 1: Maine town at like five forty in the morning one time. Damn,
- 45:20Speaker 1: and there's just what there was just an uber there.
- 45:22Speaker 4: Good ship.
- 45:22Speaker 1: It's twenty minutes. But you know, there's ubers all over
- 45:24Speaker 1: New England. You think that you're in a remote part
- 45:26Speaker 1: of New England, there won't be anything there. The boys
- 45:28Speaker 1: got to eat in New England, too.
- 45:29Speaker 4: True if you've been somewhere there isn't ubers and realize
- 45:31Speaker 4: how inconvenient it is.
- 45:33Speaker 7: I mean, I think it's in me when I have
- 45:34Speaker 7: to wait like seven minutes for an uber in.
- 45:36Speaker 4: New York, in New York, if it's only two minutes,
- 45:38Speaker 4: I'm furious.
- 45:39Speaker 7: Yeah, how is this even possible?
- 45:40Speaker 4: Yeah, that's how it is at ubers driving by. Yeah,
- 45:43Speaker 4: in Chicago's Healthscape city, Yeah, shithole takes a while, Yeah, shithole.
- 45:48Speaker 1: Everybody talks on New York half the employees have been
- 45:51Speaker 1: robbed at gumpoint.
- 45:55Speaker 8: New York's a shithole.
- 45:56Speaker 4: It is true.
- 45:57Speaker 1: So you saw a homeless person, dude, I almost got
- 46:00Speaker 1: worked off by all.
- 46:02Speaker 4: Ron and I were talking about yesterday how here everyone
- 46:04Speaker 4: goes stay safe?
- 46:05Speaker 7: Really?
- 46:06Speaker 4: Is that like every time you're leaving, everyone's all right, man,
- 46:09Speaker 4: stay safe.
- 46:10Speaker 7: Yeah, I guess it's New York.
- 46:12Speaker 4: It's usually see you tomorrow.
- 46:13Speaker 7: Yeah.
- 46:14Speaker 8: And in Chicago, it's like they take a picture of
- 46:17Speaker 8: you to like.
- 46:17Speaker 7: Prove that I do fear the homeless in like another city,
- 46:20Speaker 7: more like if I'm in New York, all these are
- 46:21Speaker 7: my New York homeless.
- 46:22Speaker 4: New York almost doesn't scare me at all.
- 46:24Speaker 7: Yeah, it's almost, but like they should.
- 46:26Speaker 4: They don't, I.
- 46:27Speaker 7: Think one.
- 46:29Speaker 1: No, because they don't have anything like a Chicago homeless
- 46:33Speaker 1: is like the man has a fucking weapon, a big
- 46:37Speaker 1: automatic weapon. Yeah, it's all he had. New York they
- 46:41Speaker 1: could too, sleeping on a pillow of a fucking ar fifteen.
- 46:44Speaker 4: Half the office here is talking about getting fucking their
- 46:47Speaker 4: concealed carry license. Seriously, I'm not even like, no, I know.
- 46:50Speaker 4: Then the gambling came for five minutes yesterday and ten
- 46:53Speaker 4: people coming and They're like, when do you guys want
- 46:54Speaker 4: to go get our court to our course. Yeah, I've
- 46:57Speaker 4: been scoping some ars that look pretty good.
- 46:59Speaker 1: It's like picture the picture of the family where everybody
- 47:02Speaker 1: has like all the guns laid out.
- 47:05Speaker 3: Yeah.
- 47:06Speaker 7: I did actually says like that's what the lockers are for.
- 47:08Speaker 7: Ye I was in an uber ar.
- 47:15Speaker 1: You're in an uber I was.
- 47:16Speaker 7: Going from the hotel to the office and this like
- 47:18Speaker 7: I had here and this hippie.
- 47:20Speaker 1: Uber uber driver, this hippie Ubi driver.
- 47:23Speaker 7: It was like, man, I'm just gonna leave you with
- 47:25Speaker 7: one last piece of advice, Like I tell this to
- 47:27Speaker 7: all my customers, like never walk around with your headphones
- 47:31Speaker 7: and like always keep your headphones out when you're walking, right,
- 47:33Speaker 7: And I was like, what a what a crazy piece
- 47:36Speaker 7: of advice? Have you never heard that before? Though? People
- 47:38Speaker 7: my parents, you know, I know, my my mom says
- 47:40Speaker 7: that all the time.
- 47:41Speaker 4: But like then when you go to New York and
- 47:42Speaker 4: I'm like, I'm never gonna take my headphones out.
- 47:44Speaker 7: Right right, Yeah, But like in Chicago, I guess that's
- 47:47Speaker 7: that's the move. Yeah, you can't listen to music in
- 47:51Speaker 7: the city of Chicago within the city limits.
- 47:53Speaker 1: Or I mean you can but it's one hundred percent
- 47:55Speaker 1: guarantee that you will get robbed, right or just play
- 47:58Speaker 1: some one will play the knock game with the back
- 47:59Speaker 1: of your head.
- 48:00Speaker 7: Yeah yeah, you're making me scared Diger to go back
- 48:03Speaker 7: to this hotel.
- 48:04Speaker 1: Now, don't go just wear that for the final Who
- 48:08Speaker 1: gives a fuck? There's like, uh, no, I want to
- 48:09Speaker 1: wear your suits here. Your suits aren't gonna fit good anyway.
- 48:12Speaker 1: You're not.
- 48:12Speaker 7: That's no. No, this one, uh you're gonna fucking wash
- 48:15Speaker 7: your mouth out with sol This one's that's good.
- 48:16Speaker 8: Well, then why are you wearing Nike socks with New
- 48:18Speaker 8: Balance shoes?
- 48:19Speaker 7: Then this doesn't matter.
- 48:20Speaker 4: I do like those shoes, I know, I like the shoes,
- 48:22Speaker 4: but you're right exact same pair. I think Dave has
- 48:26Speaker 4: a similar How much are those? Are those really expensive?
- 48:28Speaker 10: No?
- 48:29Speaker 4: Five fifties?
- 48:30Speaker 1: Those were always like one hundred and thirty dollars or something.
- 48:32Speaker 4: Oh shit, I'm gonna buy what are those tonight?
- 48:34Speaker 7: Wow?
- 48:34Speaker 4: Look at these?
- 48:35Speaker 7: Someone got that three fifty back? Yeah, I mean, what
- 48:38Speaker 7: are we in fucking eighth grade?
- 48:39Speaker 1: Look at this one floppy ass shoes.
- 48:42Speaker 4: This is my sock right here.
- 48:44Speaker 7: The lesbians in my elementary school would wear those.
- 48:47Speaker 4: Yeah, converse, you don't like converse.
- 48:49Speaker 7: Your converse are like an elementary school lesbian.
- 48:52Speaker 8: They're like your comedy, no soul?
- 48:58Speaker 7: What's that to me?
- 48:59Speaker 1: That's as you can give it a left, Tommy, that
- 49:01Speaker 1: was that direct obssess your soulless comedy like.
- 49:06Speaker 4: That, bullies. I don't need this fucking ship, dude.
- 49:09Speaker 1: I'm not looking forward to this flight back. What time?
- 49:12Speaker 7: What's time?
- 49:14Speaker 4: And he doesn't say, but Ron's looking forward to it
- 49:16Speaker 4: because he's not flying first class.
- 49:17Speaker 1: I know he's You guys are on the same flight
- 49:19Speaker 1: because I had to fly on your Yeah, I am,
- 49:22Speaker 1: and because I had to fly on Sass's flight because
- 49:24Speaker 1: he needed a flying buddy.
- 49:25Speaker 8: He's not allowed to fly alone.
- 49:26Speaker 4: What do you mean you need to fly on my flight?
- 49:28Speaker 4: You booked your flight and then I booked my flights
- 49:30Speaker 4: to be the same as yours.
- 49:31Speaker 7: Are you going to sit together now?
- 49:34Speaker 4: I don't. I hate doing that.
- 49:36Speaker 3: I know.
- 49:38Speaker 8: Actually I would say with Tommy what I would sit.
- 49:40Speaker 4: With you and you would want to sit on like
- 49:42Speaker 4: a long flight and talk.
- 49:43Speaker 7: There's some people small.
- 49:45Speaker 1: Talk is elite, like if well, well, if we have
- 49:47Speaker 1: a like small talk because you great, Yeah, you can't
- 49:50Speaker 1: tell if you're mocking me or no, Me and you
- 49:51Speaker 1: have great small ti.
- 49:52Speaker 7: We do, We really do.
- 49:53Speaker 1: Sometimes we just talk on the phone, That's what I mean.
- 49:55Speaker 1: I mean Sas would never talk on the phone like that.
- 49:57Speaker 1: If I even call him, he'll text me. I'll him
- 50:00Speaker 1: back and he just won't answer because we're saving it.
- 50:02Speaker 7: For the pod.
- 50:02Speaker 4: Dude.
- 50:04Speaker 7: Yeah, this is like, it's not business for me in bro,
- 50:07Speaker 7: It's like just friend.
- 50:08Speaker 1: Me and Tommy. I have just pure small talk that
- 50:10Speaker 1: no one would want to listen to. Maybe they would, honestly,
- 50:13Speaker 1: Maybe we should start putting that on Patreon. Record our
- 50:16Speaker 1: phone conversations.
- 50:17Speaker 4: We should get on Patreon, the three of us. Yeah, Tommy,
- 50:21Speaker 4: you got any ideas to make this podcast get bigger?
- 50:22Speaker 4: Because I wrote down a bunch.
- 50:24Speaker 7: No, I'm not an ideas guy.
- 50:26Speaker 1: That is true. Or you're not like especially not for
- 50:28Speaker 1: other people. Yeah, you're the most selfish with your ideas
- 50:31Speaker 1: of any No.
- 50:31Speaker 7: That's not true. I give out ideas like what we
- 50:34Speaker 7: have those New York meetings. I feel like I've thrown
- 50:36Speaker 7: out ideas.
- 50:37Speaker 1: Yeah, because I made fun of you for not giving
- 50:38Speaker 1: out ideas.
- 50:39Speaker 4: But even before you did.
- 50:40Speaker 7: That, it was misguided. You went in with a misconception
- 50:42Speaker 7: that I wasn't going to give out ideas, But there
- 50:43Speaker 7: I was given out.
- 50:44Speaker 1: No, you save your ideas for the Smoke Show.
- 50:46Speaker 7: That's not true. They were all shot already.
- 50:49Speaker 1: Yeah, because and that's why you were finally were able
- 50:51Speaker 1: to give out some new ideas because you had it
- 50:53Speaker 1: you'd use all the good ones on yourself.
- 50:55Speaker 7: But I didn't know we weren't having those meetings when
- 50:57Speaker 7: we came up with the Smoke Show ideas.
- 50:59Speaker 1: I'm always thinking about other people. I'm always thinking about
- 51:02Speaker 1: ideas that I could play.
- 51:03Speaker 4: That's true, is gifting other ideas to people.
- 51:05Speaker 7: But he's in he's in such a comfortable place and
- 51:07Speaker 7: he's made it.
- 51:08Speaker 4: Then you won't give us a single idea to help
- 51:10Speaker 4: us grow the show.
- 51:12Speaker 7: I don't. That's not like I won't give you one.
- 51:14Speaker 7: That's like I don't have one. I don't you know.
- 51:15Speaker 7: I've never run a successful podcast.
- 51:17Speaker 1: Okay, how about this one? Uh a leg to stand
- 51:22Speaker 1: on and we have a conversation. We do a podcast
- 51:24Speaker 1: and we're all standing on one leg and first uh
- 51:28Speaker 1: and first one to fall off?
- 51:30Speaker 11: Uh?
- 51:30Speaker 8: They get they get ketchup.
- 51:33Speaker 4: I like that a lot.
- 51:34Speaker 7: Get like they get gifted ketchup or.
- 51:36Speaker 8: That part is kind of up for interpretation.
- 51:38Speaker 4: Book with that one pretty heavily. That's a great idea.
- 51:42Speaker 4: I wrote down a couple. I wrote a couple. I'll
- 51:44Speaker 4: read them off late later later.
- 51:47Speaker 1: Double thumbs up, rico or maybe now, actually what you
- 51:52Speaker 1: want to read him off? Or you know, don't give
- 51:53Speaker 1: him away for free. We want to surprise people with
- 51:55Speaker 1: the ideas. Or but if people, if fans of the
- 51:58Speaker 1: show have ideas, we're blowing this ship up in twenty
- 52:00Speaker 1: twenty four.
- 52:01Speaker 4: Through a doubling numbers. Doubling the numbers in twenty twenty four,
- 52:05Speaker 4: that's real.
- 52:06Speaker 1: Are you from Ireland? Because our numbers are fucking doubling?
- 52:09Speaker 4: That's facts. Umm, alright, Toling, all right, shall we end this? Yeah,
- 52:16Speaker 4: all right, thank you guys for listening. We'll see you soon. Hey,
- 52:20Speaker 4: make sure you subscribe like the show. Much love, much
- 52:24Speaker 4: love from Tommy. Thank you, guys.
- 52:26Speaker 7: I was on a riffing with you, guys.
- 52:27Speaker 4: Goodbye, Happy New Year, Happy New Year.