Latest / LeadingLane Podcast / We're Gonna Need Cake with Valerie Garcia | LeadingLane Podcast | Episode 46
Transcript
- Steven L Burch (00:00) Conversation first, talk about your book, obviously. We love it. And so I know we have some questions for you, but it'll let you do the entry and kind of let you run with the show on that side of things. And then if there's an, like, we'll see where the conversation goes, but I know that we also have questions for, you know, how to write a book. Well, how did you get into that? You know, public speaking, getting out into, you know, stepping out into the world, what that looks like and how we can help people. Valerie Garcia (00:13) Okay. Steven L Burch (00:30) and go that direction as well if you're open to that. Cool. Okay. Ashley, you want to do the intro? I'll let you just kind of start with it. Okay. Valerie Garcia (00:33) Okay, sounds great. Ashley (00:41) Sure. All right. All right. Welcome everyone to the leading lane podcast. We are excited to have our friend Valerie Garcia as a guest on our podcast today. I met Valerie I think it was maybe three years ago at a train the trainer session in St. Louis. I think she was maybe a little bit before that. And I've had the chance to follow Valerie. She's a fantastic human and she recently wrote an amazing book that we're going to talk about today. I've now read it twice, so I'm excited to talk about that and some other things. So Valerie, why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself? Valerie Garcia (01:24) Well, thanks for having me. I'm excited to hang out with you guys for a little while today. Yes, I'm a public speaker. I'm a storyteller. I'm an author. I have been in the sales and marketing space for over 25 years. And I'm passionate about helping people tell their stories in different ways, whether it's for their business or just for their lives. So, yeah. Steven L Burch (01:29) Yeah. I'm super stoked to have you. So thank you for being here. I know I have a ton of questions that I want to ask you, but before we get to my questions, I too have read your book now twice. I've read it, you know, like the old school paperback way, and then also listening to you. And I love hearing your voice when, you know, telling your story, I could just hear the little fun little jokes that you crack in there and whatnot. So I really enjoyed listening to it as well. But let's go into this wonderful book. What is the title? Give us a rundown. Share with amazing people out there what you are sharing with the world. Valerie Garcia (02:30) Yeah, so the book is called We're Gonna Need Cake, Celebrating Authentic Leadership in a Messy World. And I really wrote this book because I do feel like we should celebrate the mess. I think we are all messy. Every one of us is in the mess every day. It's been really interesting hearing the reactions to the word mess. So we'll come back to that. But it was really... this book came out of my own journey kind of through the mess of the last four or five years of my life and the lessons that I learned and how I relay those lessons into my business and into my relationships and the world. And I just really felt like we needed a lighthearted look at leadership through the lens of, hey, it's not all hustle and crush it and fancy and... all the things that we've maybe necessarily been told for decades in business, that it doesn't have to be so black and white in terms of leadership and mass at work. Steven L Burch (03:39) So, you know, when going through this, and I know you made a post a while back ago about, you know, this kind of cringey, and I'm paraphrasing here, so correct my terminology here, but this cringey words and whatnot that people are using, grind and hustle harder and 10X. And, you know, when I first got into leadership and growing a team, I read the book 10X by Grant Cardone, and it really resonated with me then because it was exactly what I... was doing, being louder than everybody else, you know, going. But then there's also this ick to this 10X. And, you know, I think that he serves his purpose. Don't get me wrong. But if I would have had your book when I first started in leadership and showing that I don't have to have this wall up constantly, this ball of concrete that my life is perfect and showing vulnerability and emotions. And I want to get into some of this aspect of You talk a lot about authenticity and being vulnerable and showing emotions. Emotions are not bad in the workplace. Can you elaborate a little bit more on that? Valerie Garcia (04:48) Yeah, so kind of start out the book, you know, talking about how when I was growing up, you know, one of the things I heard from from my dad mostly was always, you know, don't get so emotional. Don't be so emotional. And I really kind of grew up with this idea like, emotions like shove those down and, you know, keep those away. and then I got into, you know, my first kind of real corporate job. And it was a lot of that just like, fake it till you make it. Leave your emotions at the door. You know, leave that sort of personal mess or drama at the door. And yeah, I kind of got into that cycle of, yes, crush it, show up, grind, put a smile on your face, fake it till you make it. And I kind of did about two decades of that in the corporate space. And you're right, those sort of 10x ideas, those work hard things. I don't think they're all bad, but I do think they tend to lead us down the path of if you're going to be a leader, if you're going to show up, you know, you really just have to have this giant wall between who you are as a person and how you feel and the work that you do. And I kind of wanted to, I wanted to break some holes in that wall and say, Hey, you know what, maybe we don't bleed our, our drama all over our work, but we are better at work. We are better leaders with our people when we bring our emotions to the table, because That is what makes us human. Like emotions are what make us amazing and thoughtful and curious and hopeful and scared and all the things that make us real. Steven L Burch (06:23) and relatable, right? Like, I mean, that's what we're in leadership that what we're trying to do is we're leading people, but we have to be able to have that common connection and relate with the people that we're trying to lead. And the easiest, in my opinion, way to do that is through the emotion and vulnerability aspect of things and being open and honest with them, right? Open mind and open heart constantly. So no, I definitely love that. Ashley (06:24) . I think you mentioned that it's really that we're not allowed to be successful or leaders and a mess. And I think that that's not reality. And I think that that's what people see is they only see successes, right? They only see leadership and they then try to attain that and figure out that that's not reality. And we've kind of misled everyone by thinking that we are perfect when that's what we're trying to say, but in all reality, we're struggling behind the scenes to make it work. where if we're just more open with everyone, right, you kind of talk about when you ask for help, a lot of things can happen positively as well. Valerie Garcia (07:27) Yeah, yeah, so true. Steven L Burch (07:28) So I, and correct me if I'm wrong, like, it appears that your target audience when you wrote this book is primarily to the female world, right? The female powerful women. And there's nothing wrong with that whatsoever, right? But I also, go ahead. Valerie Garcia (07:44) I think it's funny that you say that because my publisher and I had this argument for months. I was like, this is not a book for women. And they were like, you know, it really is kind of, I was like, look, just because I'm a woman doesn't mean this is a book for women. And it's so funny because I would say that the most emotional, vulnerable, you know, kind of passionate responses to this book have been from men. Well, you know, I would say probably predominantly women have bought the book. the biggest responses in terms of emotion or just thoughtfulness have been for men. And so yeah, I think it's funny that it's this idea of like, women are emotional. But there have been so many men that have reached out to me and gone, gosh, wish that I had somebody had told me this years ago that, you know, like I have been doing this and I've been sort of shoving my emotions down and I don't feel like I can be vulnerable. And I don't know where that idea came from. So Yeah, I think while there's so much of that perspective for women, it's true for men too. Steven L Burch (08:49) And I agree, and that's exactly where I was going to go is, you know, I was telling Ashley when reading this, there's so many different things that resonated with me. And then not only just on the emotion side of things, because I think as males as well, like we're always told, you know, you're not allowed to cry. You're not allowed to do this. You're not allowed to show your emotion. That's, you know, you stop acting like a girl, you know, those types of things that are constantly thrown at us. But for me, it resonated in a manner that there's different perspectives that you shared. that I did not even think about from a woman's perspective whatsoever. The Olympics, being able to stick the landing, right? And I know that was something of Ashley's. my gosh, I would have never put that connection together. So I think that this book should be shared with men and women and being able to have everybody be able to read this and understand it and Ashley (09:30) if that meant. Steven L Burch (09:48) from different perspectives, but also understand that when we talk about emotions, it's not just because you're woman. It's not just because you're a man, right? This is as a human being across the board. And in leadership, we are leading all types of different people from all types of different backgrounds. So we should not categorize just because emotion, it's directly related to a woman. Valerie Garcia (10:10) Yeah, Steven L Burch (10:12) So Ashley, when you were talking about this book, you and I, this week, the stepping back aspect of things, sometimes that you have to step back a little bit to be able to move forward. Let's talk about that a little bit. What are our thoughts on that? Ashley (10:28) Yeah, I I love Valerie to kind of give the example of what she used. mean, we don't want to give away the whole book, but I think it's important, you know, even I think, you know, with not to talk politics, but how some people might feel, right, about the state of the country and in general, like sometimes people have to take a step back in whatever realm that might be. But we all want to move forward and, you know, creating equals, if you will. I think when you talk about the Olympics, as far as a male landing and a female landing, which I never knew. So if you want to share that. Valerie Garcia (11:01) Yeah, it's the craziest thing. When I learned this, I was just like, well, first of all, was like, are you kidding me? But yeah, I mean, in the book, I talk about Mary Lou Retton and watching the Olympics as a child and really learning that idea of sticking the landing. So after you complete a floor exercise or anything in gymnastics, you sort of stick the landing. And in Ashley (11:09) with it. Valerie Garcia (11:28) in the official gymnastics rules, there are two rules, one for men and one for women. When men land at the end of their performance, they have to basically plant their feet and are not allowed to move their feet as they land. But women are allowed to take one step back without deduction. And when I first heard this, I was like, what? we can't like we're not as you know like I went to all those places of like you know I got very defensive like women get that sort of like handicap because we can't but the more I thought about it the more I realized like I'm actually kind of more angry for the men like women are allowed to take a step back without deduction but men aren't And like in leadership, when we start thinking about when things don't go right or when we don't exactly perform perfectly, or when we don't stick the landing and look perfect for everyone, you know, why are there, why isn't everyone allowed to take a step back without deduction? That should be, that should be the standard. Everybody, you know, take a step back without deduction, realizing that sometimes we have to do that in order to move forward. Steven L Burch (12:42) I think it's a beautiful analogy, shitty rule, beautiful analogy, right? And I think that's with everything, because we are programmed and in your book you talk a lot about how some of these are unwritten rules that, you know, who's really telling us that we have to work 80 to 100 hours a week? You know, these are things that we tell ourselves because we have to constantly grind and go, go, go. But this unwritten rule has now put us to where Valerie Garcia (12:42) Yeah. Yes! Steven L Burch (13:12) it's completely unacceptable to even slow down a little bit. And I honestly think when you slow down in business and in life, that's where the inspiration comes from. That's where the creativity comes from. And really that's when I think you speed up really quickly thereafter because you have that opportunity to be able to slow down and reflect. So I think it's a great way to explain that it's not a bad way to be able to do it, but also it's this. Valerie Garcia (13:30) Yeah. Steven L Burch (13:38) uncertainty and rule that we are putting on ourselves while also there's outside influences that are putting these rules onto us as well, limiting us. So, in your book, you also shared, and let me give you a little bit background here. Like Ashlyn, I always talk about these old rich white men and we, know, economic development, we're in small rural America towns, very similar and Valerie Garcia (13:47) Yeah. Yeah. you Steven L Burch (14:05) We always talk about these old rich white men that never want to change. You know, obviously I am a male, but you know, as a female walking into all of these things as well, like they definitely don't like that. They definitely don't like a gay man walking in and trying to say something to. So it's it's ironic that, know, this is kind of a common theme that we're seeing more and more. Maybe I'm just being more open to this and seeing this is happening a lot of places. But you shared about how there was an opportunity that you were going to be doing your presentation to talk on stage. And you made a comment to the company that you were working for is going to hire you about everybody on the roster are white men. Can you talk about that and what you put in the book? And I have a couple of questions for you to follow up. Valerie Garcia (14:54) Yeah, so I think that was one of the stories that I was particularly kind of, I mean, I was a little scared to put that in the book as a speaker. But it, you know, it happens a lot where I'll, you know, in this case, the story I shared in the book, I had signed a contract, I had not, you know, they were just building the agenda, the roster of speakers. And when the agenda came out, you know, it was a vast array of First of all, no one on the roster was below 40. Everyone was white. Everyone was older. It absolutely did not reflect the audience. The audience was there. It was an event particularly around recruiting. And so when I think of recruiting, I'm thinking we're not all just hiring in a mirror, hopefully. you know, that we are looking for diversity of thought and experience and, you know, ideas and the stage did not reflect the audience. And so I went back to the, you know, the client and I said, Hey, you know, this really doesn't reflect the audience is, you know, is the content reflecting the audience because the speakers are, are definitely not. And immediately my contract was canceled. I was, I was pulled off of, you know, the event and I learned a lot in that event, in that experience. And now I approach it very differently. I, instead of saying, hey, this doesn't reflect the audience, I say, hey, I would love to suggest to you a couple of people that are, I think would really add some depth to this roster. But yeah, think it's a, I know I love that you say old rich white men. I usually say stale, and pale. But it's Ashley (16:46) I love them. Steven L Burch (16:46) a little bit more politically correct. Ashley (16:48) I like Valerie's film. Valerie Garcia (16:49) But it's, you know, I don't think it's, you and I know there are probably men that are listening to this that have immediately gone like, eh, not, you know, like, but it doesn't matter what the group is, you know, there needs to be, I feel there always should be diversity of thought, experience, ideas, opinions, you know, backgrounds, because it makes it richer, more nuanced. more creative, you there, you literally cannot get to breakthrough without challenge. It's, it's, it's basic psychology. If we are always in comfort, we are never growing. And so if we are building environments for ourselves, through events or education or speakers or leadership teams or whatever, where we are always in comfort, because we are never challenged on our opinions or thoughts, we are never growing. And so, yeah, that was definitely one of those experiences where I learned rather than say, hey, we have a potential challenge here is here are some solutions, but, know, it's an ongoing battle. Steven L Burch (17:53) So did you find, I mean, I hear like some of the, like you've learned from that opportunity, but did you feel empowered though that like you're standing up for people that maybe don't have a voice? Did you feel empowered and how does that move forward to, know, these are sometimes uncomfortable conversations to be had with people. So how do you continue to have those conversations even though that, yeah, you you have a little bit of hesitation, but. we have to continue to be the leader in the room. Valerie Garcia (18:25) Yeah, I think that I've really, I think it's definitely changed the work that I do with leaders around the idea of change in that, really getting us comfortable with discomfort, comfortable with being challenged, comfortable with hearing different points of view, I think has become a bigger focus for me. You know, I think a lot of people are like, hey, I'm just going to surround myself with people who say the things that I love to hear because then I'm going to clap and they're going to get a standing ovation. And I think we do that a lot in, you know, at bigger events. We tend to book the same speakers because people love them. But I guess my question always is when you're booking the person that everyone loves, is that person at any point saying to the audience what they don't want to hear but need to? You know, and that's definitely been something that kind of has weighed on me a lot in the last couple of years is that, like, I really want it to be my job, my calling to say what you don't want to hear in a way that you need to hear it, but in a way that makes you feel like, thank you, I needed that. because I think we surround ourselves a lot of times intentionally or unintentionally with echo chambers, know, like we can't control the algorithm anymore. And we don't get uncomfortable around the topics that we struggle with in work or life. Yeah. Steven L Burch (19:44) You know, we, I hosted a, Ashley was here a part of this as well, a, a broker fast track retreat a couple of weeks ago. And one of the conversations, and actually this came from Emrin Pilati, which this is how I met you. and so Emrin was here, what, two years ago and we had this conversation around race. and so then, you know, it was a beautiful conversation. was, extremely vulnerable. One of a couple of my agents, you know, shared their story about being in a, being black in a rural America type of society. And so this year that was something that I felt like it was extremely important to still have that conversation. Obviously I'm white. And so I had a conversation with my agent, Andrina. said, Hey, I think this is so important and I appreciate you sharing your story. And she's been on our podcast and You know, we talk a lot, obviously in person as well. And I asked her she was comfortable sharing that story again, but coming from me versus coming from Emron. and she was like, of course. So we, we, you know, pulled her chair up and we had a whole discussion about race. And this is in front of a group of people that didn't really know where the conversation was going to go, but very well could be uncomfortable for some of them. But I felt it was so important for her not to only share her story. But for me to be able to make sure that this is a topic that we recognize that could potentially be happening in our own companies right now, it made me more blind to it and we need to be more open to it. We say we're diverse and we want diversity, but how do you really actually accomplish that if you truly don't have that roster of diversity? So I, that was very inspiring to hear that you stood up and you're correct. It doesn't matter if it's what room you were with or what group of people you're with. There's always different perspectives. So I applaud you for continuing to do that. Valerie Garcia (21:43) Thanks. mean, you know, it's scary, but it's important. Steven L Burch (21:44) Okay, go ahead, Ashley. I see. Ashley (21:49) Yeah. You know, the thing I was just going to say was you talk about, male bosses, you know, and I think that looking back, I can relate to that a lot as far as things that were inappropriately said. you know, me now 20 years later, think back to like, maybe probably should have called HR on some of those. Right. and I think, you know, especially since reading your book, I've been more aware of it and it's not necessarily like male bosses, but more so in my role, like. board members, like, you know, that you're on same thing, it tends to be the same type of population. And really, when I started thinking about it too, there's even some females that are maybe older in age, might have been, you know, prior bosses that say really inappropriate things, and nobody says anything. And I think that, you know, that is crushing to a board, because I think it changes everyone's input. So I've been really trying to use my voice very delicately, but I just can't sit back anymore and watch the inappropriate comments or the under the breath comments that more than likely are coming from males, but even the females. it is amazing once, I just think that once someone can see someone saying something, it just gives this window for someone else to be like, yeah, you're actually right. I kind of was thinking that. I think if we can all just remember that there's probably someone else that's feeling the same exact way that we're feeling. And if we can just kind of crack that door open for everyone to just be like, you know, this is probably isn't appropriate or we shouldn't be talking like this or, you know, those types of things. Valerie Garcia (23:30) Yeah, gosh, it's so important. There's a group that's using my book for their book club right now. And so I joined a couple of their calls. for those that are listening to this and haven't read the book, sort of divided it into chapters by emotion. So there's curiosity and bravery, but there's also a chapter on anger. And it's it's so interesting how people have kind of gravitated to that chapter and especially women saying, like, and I I talk about that in the book of like, we can't be angry, you know, that the angry woman, you know, it's a it's a whole stereotype. But anger is critical in terms of, you know, Ashley (24:04) God forbid. Valerie Garcia (24:12) solving conflict. Anger is critical in terms of moving forward. We actually can't solve problems if we don't get angry enough about them to do something. And, you know, how often do we kind of avoid anger? I can't get angry and I want to show, you know, I don't want to be angry. don't want to get, but it's so critical for us to have that anger towards the things we should be angry towards. You know, you should be angry when somebody speaks to you in a way that is absolutely not professional or acceptable. We should be like, anger is my body's warning signal to be like, nope, mm-mm, boundary, right? Anger is a boundary setting emotion and boundaries are so important in leadership. So yeah, I love that that chapter is resonating because that was one of the hardest chapters to write because I kept thinking, no, no, no, like we can't be angry. And then I'm like, I'm actually angry about saying we can't be angry and yeah, it was a breakthrough chapter for sure for me too. Steven L Burch (25:08) And I love how you put in there in position that then you grieve, right? The being able to, I think, and I'm paraphrasing here, the unfolding, the grieving process. And it's never just a, you're done emotion. This is a forever type of emotion that you're going to be experiencing. And for me, you know, I didn't realize until I read your book of the emotion grief and... It was, I had a restaurant that failed, right? And then, you know, I was angry and there's things that now still kind of spark, you know, this, this anger. And, it's this grief that I am going through, but it's also this experience now that I can turn around and reflect and know that that's where I don't want to go and identify the things that I did do wrong and that I could do better. And even identify the things out of that failure that I did extremely well. So realizing that that's not just because of that one situation, I can't package that all up and put a bow of just anger on it forever. This is something that I can pull out on multiple different aspects and it's something that I'm going to be able to experience for the rest of my life. And just at these times that we have no clue when this emotion is gonna come through and hit us. So that really resonated with me. And I think that these negative fear, grieving, Valerie Garcia (26:29) Yeah. Steven L Burch (26:33) they're negative, but really they're not negative. They're the process they're going through to get you through your journey. And I think that's beautifully written to explain how you go through that. And you're never truly out of that spiral. It's always a constant mess at one point or another, just different unchartered territories. Valerie Garcia (26:37) That's right. Yeah, yeah, so true. Steven L Burch (26:59) Ashley, what questions do you have? Ashley (27:02) have a couple on there. have three specifically that I wrote down that I wanted to talk about. I think, you know, I wrote it down when it says, are not for everyone. We'll leave some people behind as we grow. Steven L Burch (27:14) Take a second here. Ashley (27:15) We'll hang on for one sec. Wish it was okay. Steven L Burch (27:18) Hopefully. Cough and spell. Ashley (27:19) No. Valerie Garcia (27:20) So sorry. So I was like, just hold on. I had pneumonia a couple of weeks ago and every once in a while it's just, it's like a tickle. Ashley (27:20) that live so don't worry about that. Steven L Burch (27:21) You're dead. no. Ashley (27:29) Take your time. Take your time. Steven L Burch (27:30) Yeah, take your time. We're in no rush. Yeah. Ashley (27:35) This is one of the benefits of not being live, is when we accidentally drop something we shouldn't say. Valerie Garcia (27:35) I know. All right, I'm good. Ashley (27:46) No, I'm eating an ice cube. Valerie Garcia (27:47) Hmm. Steven L Burch (27:48) Great time, we're good. Ashley (27:52) Okay, we're back. All right. One of the things I wrote down was, you're not for everyone. We'll leave some people behind as we grow. And it just really resonated with me because Steven and I talk about that a lot. And I think that, you you obviously talk about it, I think with leadership, when you change your circles, there is this struggle of wanting to, you know, be connected to the past and your people. But in all reality, I kind of refer to it as the crab bucket, right? Where like people are just pulling you back down. So can you talk to us a little bit about just what that's meant for you as far as moving forward and realizing the past is the past for some of those people? Valerie Garcia (28:36) Gosh, yes. Like this has been a hard one for me. I have been a people pleaser my whole life. I'm the oldest daughter. I have been this person that's always been like, I just want to make everybody happy. I just want to take care of everybody. And when I got into corporate training and public speaking, I tell the story in the book how there's always that one person, right? In the room that's like sitting there with their arms crossed, like, you know, and you can just see it on their face. that they're like, nope, I'm not buying any of this. And, you know, early on in my career, used to just, I used to just turn cartwheels to try and make that person happy. You know, I would forget the other 99 people in the room and I would put all of my focus on that one person, just like, gosh, if I can win them over, I've done my job. And then I think I tell the story in the book about how one day I got the... you know, reviews back from a group and they, you know, somebody had said, you know, like she spent all of her time trying to convince that one person that was never going to get it at the expense of everyone else. And I just remember that being like, whoa, that was one of those moments where I was like, and I really had to sit with that and realize, yes, I was doing that. You know, I was like, just if I can win over the one hater, I win. But no, I mean, I was actually failing everyone else. And, you know, it was this lesson of I'm not for everyone. And in fact, it's exhausting to try and be for everyone. And, you know, I would much rather be all in with a few people who absolutely, you know, one of the things I always say is like you, your goal is not to be for everyone. Your goal is to be the right fit, the absolute right fit for, for a few. And Steven L Burch (30:09) Yes. Ashley (30:09) What? Valerie Garcia (30:25) I think in leadership we can, or just, you know, work our lives. We can focus so much on just like, don't want to make anybody unhappy. I don't want anyone to hate me. And, my gosh, am I feeling that today? Because I've said a few things on social media lately about my disappointment and the way things have gotten the last few days or, you know, my views on how humans should be treating each other. And I've had some people, you know, that have really come back and gone like, hard line for me. And I'm like, bye. Okay, I'm never going to win you over. And also, I'm not gonna twist myself inside out and pretend to be somebody different to make you love me. And it's okay. You know, I think as leaders, you we have to remember, like, while we're leading everyone, we can't try and change the rules or even our personalities for that one person that's always going to be unhappy. Ashley (31:24) Right. Well, I think, you you mentioned leaders, which leads me to my next point. I recently sent your book to someone who is not a quote unquote boss in her company, but I've tried to have the discussions of her with her about just being a leader, you know, so you spend some time in there about, don't necessarily have to be a boss to be a leader. And I think that that's really important for people to maybe sit back and kind of just soak in that sure you might not be a boss, but if you can help with. morale or do the other things, still say the right thing. It doesn't mean you're the boss, but you can still be a leader of your friend circle or your company or whatever that might be. Valerie Garcia (32:06) Yeah, yeah, it's so true. I think we all have that responsibility to lead in whatever circles we're in. I think we have a responsibility to stand up for what we think is right. And it's so true. I mean, we've all had bosses that were not leaders. And we've all had leaders in our lives that were not our boss. And it's a beautiful thing when it happens to be both. But yeah, it's a... I and I've had both as well. And I think it's that reminder to all of us that, you know, I was I was on a really contentious board. Speaking of boards, actually, I was on a really contentious board recently. And, you know, it was like you had moments where you're like, OK, I can lead this conversation where I genuinely feel it needs to go or. You know, I can try and bully people into it, which was some people's, you know, chosen path. But you're. You know leaders leaders are always going to get paid more than followers leaders are always going to be The ones who people look to and you don't have to be a boss to do that Ashley (33:09) love that. And one little thing I took out of your book. So a lot of people know that I'm fairly focused in the morning, because I just want to get shit done. So I, you know, beamed my office and this goes back to like many, many years ago. One of my reviews was that I didn't say good morning to people. Yeah. Valerie Garcia (33:20) Good for you. Good for you. I know where you're going with this one. Steven L Burch (33:35) Thank Ashley (33:37) But it's just so funny how we all interpret that differently, right? So like for me, I just was like, yep, it's first thing in the morning, I got stuff to do, I'm gonna go get my stuff done and whatnot. And I've tried to work on that over the years and then sometimes I think I just forget, because again, my mind's gone 100 miles an hour. But when you mentioned it in your book about just how open people were with that boss, that what could he do better? And it was the simple fact of... Valerie Garcia (33:42) Yeah. Ashley (34:05) saying good morning or having a little bit better of a conversation about them of how things are going. And I think that that's like one really big takeaway from the book that I hope that other people would find is amazing what that will do for morale is just saying good morning or asking how their weekend was. And I just think about how many times that's come up in my past that people say that I don't engage them enough. it is sometimes personality, right? But it is being aware of how it could be perceived by others, even though just like in the book, was never his intention. You know, so I've really worked on that too over the last two months of saying good morning and asking how, know, what their plans are for the weekend. And it is funny just how it leads to other conversations and other funny things happen just because you happen to take that extra 30 seconds. Valerie Garcia (34:52) Yeah, yeah. I love that that resonated. I remember that event so clearly. And, you know, ultimately it was it wasn't even the good morning. was the fact that, you know, that boss really took the time to listen to the feedback and and took action on it. But yeah, I think, you know, we have so many moments like that that sometimes we don't realize what we're doing. Like we just we think, I'm just just doing the thing. Right. It's kind of a beautiful thing to. to do that self-reflection. I have those moments too. Steven L Burch (35:22) Love it. So I'm going to kind of go maybe a little bit of a different direction. You've been sharing a lot on Facebook about, you know, your grandmother and things about, you know, what's going on in life. And I think that and I can relate with this. think it's probably why it's so fresh in my mind, because my grandmother, too, is going through some health stuff right now. And it's it's scary. Right. And so my my team this week, we're rolling out Rays where We're now going to sky slope from docuSign transaction rooms. Our forms have been a hot mess. know, any of our lawsuit as a whole is a shit show, right? Like all of these things that are happening and we have no control. Well, what happened is we were asking for feedback about Raze specifically. Fantastic app, love it. But there were some negative things that were coming through and we asked our agents to email us. Valerie Garcia (36:13) Yeah. Steven L Burch (36:20) Well, when we were getting these emails, my grandmother was getting admitted into the hospital and I was reading these this feedback and I immediately got so defensive and like really I opened up the next day at our actual sales meeting and I was like, look, I was reading these. I'm taking them personally. I should not be. But let me kind of share what's going on. Gave the synopsis and I said, I want to share what I felt, but I also know that what I felt was not correct. And I want to figure out the solution and understand where you guys are coming from versus just attacking and reacting to this. And they didn't know about my grandmother at the time yet. But, you know, I just shared that basically I wanted to tell everybody to fuck off. I wanted to like leave. didn't care what their opinion was. You're doing it. But really, some of these were valid things. So my point of this is that I think it's important that we do share. what is going on in life. don't need to share everything that is going on. I get that, but people need to understand when we are getting these feedback, and this goes both ways, that we don't know what that other person is actually going through. And we are making decisions as leaders constantly, and we do need to slow ourselves down and not react. But once I then later on shared about my grandmother, things changed drastically. People were reaching out, they were caring, and I said, just want you guys to know that this is kind of why my reaction was the way that it was, is because this is what I was going through. But I wanted to share and be open and vulnerable with you about my feelings and so that I did not make a wrong choice or react and make you feel any sort of way, because that's not fair for take my feeling and deflect it and throw it to you. So can you share a little bit about how, you know, yes, it's OK to share these things, but you don't have to share everything in life. Valerie Garcia (38:05) to. Yeah. Well, so much to unpack there, Steven. Yeah. You know, I talk about this in the book, but I go back years ago and I was deeply struggling with depression. was having... I'll just be honest. I didn't have a single day where I didn't think about dying. For probably two years... and that, you know, when you get into those mind habits, when you go down the negative path every day and it becomes a path that your brain starts taking without you even knowing it, when you get into that. And I see that happen with people in their subconscious with negativity, right? the, market's terrible. You tell yourself that enough and guess what it is for you. and so I was in this really dark place of like, you know, like everything is really. hard. And that is kind of where I lived. and yet, you know, I was on the internet every day posting happy memes and positivity and things are great. And look at this and I'm on stage in another city and and someone I didn't know very well asked me to lunch and and we went and we sat down and she said to me, you know, she started to cry and she said, you know, my My marriage is falling apart. My business is struggling. All of these terrible things are happening in my life. And you have seemed to, you you seem to have the secret to keeping it all together. And I just kind of want to know what that is. And I just have that, you know, moment where it's like the world stopped. And I just remember looking at her and thinking, yeah, also my marriage is falling apart and I'm in depression and I'm, you know, that had all the same things. And yet I was just really, you know, making it look real good. on the outside. And I, you know, I kind of came away from that conversation, making a decision to do the hard things in the daylight and tell the truth. And, and it's become a habit for the last seven years that I have made an extreme effort to be real and human and tell the truth and do the hard things in the daylight. and one thing that I've learned from that is that when I give myself permission, to do that, it gives everyone around me permission to do that. So, you know, I think there is also, there is a challenge of it becoming performative. You know, I'm always very careful about that because you can go the other way. It can be like, look how things are hard, just like you say, look how things are beautiful, you know? And I think it's really important to ask yourself all the time, am I telling the truth? And it doesn't have to be the whole truth, like you said, I don't need to pour, you know, every detail of everything out onto the people around me, but I need to be real and truthful enough that people A, understand where I'm coming from, but B, have the permission to do that around me as well. You know, I want the people that I work with to say, yeah, look, you know what? I need to cancel our Zoom today because like the kid is home from school puking. And I be like, I got you. Like, I get it, you know? Or I need the ability to say to my clients, like I did twice this week, I need to cancel a Zoom because I need to be somewhere else. And when we do that, like we are better humans and everyone around us are better humans. Steven L Burch (41:35) Mm-hmm. Valerie Garcia (41:54) And this is probably the one pushback that I've gotten from people about this book is, I just don't want to be messy around people. I don't want my people to be messy around me. Who wants messy people? And I'm like, I mean, we're all messy. You're just either compressing it down and suffering the consequences, or you're forcing the people around you to do the same thing. You know, I love what Brene Brown says is that we should always speak from the we should always speak from the scar, not the wound. Like, you know, if you were in that moment, like when I was in that moment, when I was laying on the kitchen floor thinking, you know, it would be just really easy to just be done. I'm not sharing that moment in that moment. But when I've gotten to the point where that is a scar and no longer a wound, I want to have permission to tell people because I want people when they are in that moment to realize I need help or I'm not alone or I need to speak about it when I'm ready. think telling our stories is the price of admission for life. I think it gives people around us permission to do the same. And I really think that is the cornerstone of leadership is like when you get that scar, turn around and tell the story. Right? It's so important. Steven L Burch (43:18) No, I love it. Yeah, I think it's beautiful. And I've learned because, you know, five years ago, me would have just bottled everything up and just would have just kept everything. And, you know, I probably was more so than the boss and dictator. Like, this is how it's going to be. Let me lay down the law to where, you know, now that I have learned to be able to share the stories and share the insights and allow people to be able to Ashley (43:18) I love that. Steven L Burch (43:46) see that I'm not perfect and I'm here to lift people up and I need people to lift me up because I'm there to lift other people up too. I think it has transformed the way that our entire company and what I've been working in and I'm still working to grow. And I think that the people now have more respect for me and they have more of the stickiness if you will. I always get asked about culture. How do you develop this culture and how do you do this? Like you don't just have an easy button. Magic, know, magically overnight, you're gonna have culture because you want culture and everything is great in here. And I actually really hate the word culture because it's something that you just can't, you know, sprinkle in. Like you have to create it and you are the creator of the culture because you're the leader. And the more that you can, you know, create the culture and pass this from one to another to other leaders inside of your own company, now everybody's being each other's cheerleaders. and everybody's being each other's support team. And that is the culture, I think, is how you truly build it. And it has to start with the vulnerability and making sure that people know that you are a human to create that connection. Valerie Garcia (44:56) Yeah. Two things about that. I've noticed that about you just from the outside watching over the last couple of years. Like I've noticed and it's been really beautiful to watch. And I used to feel that way about the word culture too, but I did a deep dive into the definition of culture. And I'll tell you the secret that kind of changed it for me is thinking of culture as a Petri dish. Like, do remember in high school when we would like do the thing where you'd put in a dish and it would grow? So that's, that is culture. Steven L Burch (45:07) Well, thank you. Valerie Garcia (45:25) Right? And culture as a definition is creating conditions suitable for growth. And I loved that when I learned that I was like, no more is it this is like how we look or how it's am I creating conditions suitable for growth? I mean, it's kind of a beautiful way to look at it, honestly. Steven L Burch (45:43) Yeah, really is. And thank you for that challenge and Chinchef there because, you know, I think that, you know, I immediately go to when you said Petri dish, I'm thinking of this like mold that's growing and everything else and it very well could be the mold, but it also can be the positive. Mm-hmm. Valerie Garcia (46:03) video. Steven L Burch (46:03) Is it just mine? Valerie Garcia (46:04) end. Steven L Burch (46:04) Was it me? Am I the problem? Can you hear me, Ashley? Valerie Garcia (46:07) What is it, me? Steven L Burch (46:09) Do me to leave and come back in? Ashley (46:10) I can. Valerie Garcia (46:10) I know, you guys just stopped. Steven L Burch (46:12) . Okay. Can you hear me? Ashley (46:15) is Valerie there. Valerie Garcia (46:17) Can you see me? Steven L Burch (46:18) You don't see, I see the box. Valerie Garcia (46:20) I'm here. Do I leave and rejoin? Steven L Burch (46:22) Did it say any like an error or anything on your side, Ashley? Ashley (46:25) Everything was froze. Steven L Burch (46:25) Well, hell. Ashley (46:26) Great conversation. Steven L Burch (46:28) Mm-hmm. She's amazing. I love her. Ashley (46:31) There you are. Steven L Burch (46:31) Is everything back? Valerie Garcia (46:32) You guys, you just disappeared on me. I was still there. Steven L Burch (46:35) I don't know. Mike said toodaloo, I guess. Ashley (46:38) Thank recording Brandon okay the last thing that I heard was Stephen you were talking about what a Petri dish meant to you Steven L Burch (46:44) Yeah. Yeah. We're good. Valerie Garcia (46:46) You said. Yeah, last thing I heard was when you say Petri dish and then you were gone. Steven L Burch (46:55) Yeah. So I'll try to pick up from there. So where was I going? I have no clue. So when I hear you say petri dish, like my mind automatically went to like growing mold, right? And like a negative thing. And I think of, know, when you put moldy fruit next to people or excuse me, next to other fruit, like then the mold is going to, you know, go out. It's but it's it's so great because the mind shift changed there. Ashley (46:55) That's right. Steven L Burch (47:22) It doesn't need to be mold, it doesn't need be negative, it can be the positive. And now how that also passes through from one person to the other as well. So I love that chinchac and challenge from you. Thank you for putting that in perspective for me. Valerie Garcia (47:34) Yeah, yeah, I mean, what we plant grows, right? Steven L Burch (47:35) So. That's right, I love that. Let's kind of shift gears here. I don't know if you remember this conversation, Valerie, but I think we were in Denver, I could be wrong. We were somewhere, we'll go with that. Valerie Garcia (47:53) feel like you're in Chicago if you're going where I'm going. Chicago? It doesn't matter. Steven L Burch (47:56) Okay, it may have been Chicago because you spoke on stage and then you and I kind of chatted a little bit and then we met at a bar. I was at a bar and I don't know if I messaged you, you messaged me, whatever else. And I don't remember exactly what the conversations were. I do remember I was drinking a dirty martini with Grey Goose and blue cheese olives though. And I said, you know, I... I envy and thank you for sharing your story. Like I really connected with you and I wish that I could do that. And you shared some insight of what you need to be able to do or what I should do. you know, I remember back then I was like, I can never be able to do this, but I want to thank you for taking the time to have that conversation and share your story and encouraged to share my story because I'm now doing that as well. So as you said, you've been watching me. I've been a huge cheerleader of yours and advocate and love watching everything that you do. And over these years, there's so many different things that you have done and posted and spoke about and wrote about that really have inspired me to continue on and share my story. So thank you for everything that you do. But do you remember that conversation? Valerie Garcia (49:18) I do remember that conversation and it's so funny, I have a lot of those conversations where people come up and go, I wish I could do that. And I always say, you can, you just have to start, you have to just start speaking. I think a lot of people think there's some secret society or permissions that has to be signed, but it's not true. Like you just start telling your story. And I'm so proud of you for running with that and it's been fun to watch. because so many people say that and then never do anything about it or never do anything with it. the world needs more. The world needs more Stevens. The world needs more people that will tell a real human story. Steven L Burch (50:00) I appreciate that. this just echoes what we have been talking about too, as far as the people that you're surrounding yourself around, right? Because of Emrynn, I now have the pleasure of knowing Valerie. Because of Emrynn, it led me to another connection with Rebecca Mountain, which then led me to Ashley. And these people that you constantly elevate yourself with and... aspire to be and what to learn from and are open to challenges and you have to be open to challenges as well from them that have nothing but love and want you to do great. These people that we leave behind, it's not that we're no longer, they're not that they're no longer a part of our lives, they just no longer, I don't wanna say that they don't serve the same type of purpose, we're just advancing on. And we're going on to the next chapter of our own lives. And sometimes we do have to leave some of these people to continue. It's not that the connection didn't serve its purpose, did not mean that we didn't learn from them. We don't love them. It just means that we're looking to go a different direction. So for somebody that is trying to get out there and speak more and, you know, do these types of things, you've already have already done this. How do people get on stages? How do they? you know, write a book and I kind of have a feeling of what you're going to say. But what advice would you give somebody like me and other people that are out there trying to share their story? Valerie Garcia (51:36) Yeah, great questions. You know, I always tell people getting on stage is actually the easy part. You know, I could make a couple calls today and get anybody on a stage. It's what you're gonna say when you get there. You know, I think the more important thing is, you know, people say, I'd love to be a speaker. And, you know, they kind of see that like. glamorous looking outside of it, like, you're jetting off to another city when in reality, it's a lot of airports and grads and whatever. But, you know, they go, if, you know, I would love to speak. And I think, great, what do you want to say? What do you really think the world needs to hear? And how do you uniquely want to tell that story? you know, what do you want the result to be? And when I Steven L Burch (52:06) Hmm. Valerie Garcia (52:25) When I run into somebody that goes, I'd really love to be a speaker, and I ask those questions, when people have a response immediately like, well, you know, I would love to tell them this and how I learned this, and I want them to go away feeling, I'm like, yeah, right? Like you're halfway there. It's the people that say, I'd love to speak, or I'd love to write a book. And I go, about what? Like, what do you want to say? And they're like, I don't know. That's the bigger question. That's always the bigger question. And so, you know, my best advice always is, is what do you want to say? What do you want the result of that story to be? What do you want the lesson to be? And how do you want to change the person who's hearing it? and when you can answer that, you just start talking, you know, you just start writing a blog, you just start a sub stack, you start making a video and, and, and you start telling people that that's what you want to do. And you'd be surprised how many people. will make it happen with you, not for you, but with you. When I finally made the decision I was going to write a book, I I got on Facebook and I said, I'm writing a book. Well, guess what? I hadn't started it at that point, but now every single person I talked to, what they said was, how's the book coming? So accountability. And then I was writing a book. I always tell people, if you know what you want to say and you know what the result you want, you know, to be, start doing it. It sounds like... Ashley (53:56) So we both, we both talk about writing books, David and I, quite often. And Stephen's pushed me on it a little bit more as of recent. So after our last trip, I actually just started writing down like one, like literally like one word, like something that happened that would resonate and right. My goal is to empower people with stories of triumph and whatnot. think what I struggle with is Like how to put it all together, like how that makes sense or is that where an editor comes in and how do you find editors? Like how does it come so that it looks like fantastic? Like your book made complete sense from beginning to end. feel like mine is a scattered diagram. Valerie Garcia (54:37) I could show you my first diagram. It's giant sticky notes with things everywhere. You know, Ali Fallon is an author. She has a beautiful process that really helped me. She sits down and she actually does book mapping as her job with people. But her process is actually so interesting. She she starts with a million sticky notes and either a big blank wall or a floor. She actually prefers a floor. And she has you start writing every story you can think of or every point, every word, every little moment that you think would fit well and writing them on your sticky notes. And then she starts laying them out on the floor. And so she starts moving them into chapters. you know, this story goes to this chapter and after a while, you know, like she works with someone for maybe two or three days, they'll map out an entire book on the floor. and I've, used that process too. You know, I started sitting down and going, I have this little story and I want to share that. And I have this point and I have this quote and I have this, this memory and I have this thing. And I started just, you know, kind of plopping in the Menda like sections. And after a while, you know, it started making sense. And then I wrote a book proposal. So typically, if you are not self publishing, you're going to need a book proposal. And a book proposal is essentially just kind of kind of a pitch of a resume for the book. This is what it is. This is who it's for. This is what I want it to achieve. And then here's the layout of the table of contents and some of the pieces that are going to go in there. And then here's a sample chapter or an introduction. And that's really where I got a book coach involved. So I worked with a publisher and they set me up with a book coach. And she essentially walked me through that whole process of putting a proposal together. And once you have a good 30 page proposal for a book, your ideas start to get real clear. And I will tell you my original idea for my book. Steven L Burch (56:37) Thank you. Valerie Garcia (56:53) my book coach came back and said, yeah, these two chapters are the whole book. And I was like, no, but I've got like 17 ideas here. And she's like, yeah, but these two chapters, whole book. and that's where editors are really helpful because they think as humans, tend to be like, well, I got to put it all in. Well, all ideas do not make the first book. and when you're done, you tend to find, gosh, I could write. Ashley (57:02) More books. Valerie Garcia (57:19) many more books with all the things that didn't make it into the first book. So start with as much as you have. And then what a great editor will help you do is sort of start pulling pieces out and saying this is beautiful, but it doesn't fit or it detracts from the message. So yeah, a great a great book coach or editor will really help you. But the first step is just just throw it all in there and start coming up with all the things that you know you want to say. And sometimes it's pulling pieces from like things you've posted on social media or blogs you've written or notes you've written to other people and it's gonna look messy in the beginning. It's gonna look messy for a good long time. And that's okay. Ashley (58:00) Did you have like, like beta readers or like once it was kind of through like, did you give it out to people to critique or how did, how did you work through that? Valerie Garcia (58:08) Yeah, in the book world, they call those ARCs, advanced reader copies. And so there's a whole, there's a whole world for ARCs out there where there are people that are professional advanced reader copies. So that like they'll read it and tell you as a complete stranger. There are people that do that, that get paid to do it. I had a couple of people that I sort of floated it to and then I had eight people that I'd sort of handpicked that were really really important to me. And I thought also very objectives, like, I guess, like, and I, I asked them, I, you know, kind of asked them to read it and then give me some feedback. And, yeah, that was scary. cause you know, at that point you're asking people that you really care about to read your words and your thoughts. And, and then at some point you have to Ashley (58:55) Ha ha ha. Valerie Garcia (59:07) let it go and you have to realize there will be people that go, I gave it a two, you know, and then there are people that are like, I read it twice and I loved it. So yeah, it's, it's an interesting, it's an interesting process, but I think everyone should do it. I think you learn a lot about yourself. Ashley (59:25) So how did you feel about the audible part? Cause I know that some people like, I'm like a full on audible. Like I don't read books. Like, cause I always, it's like I'm driving or whatnot. Right. And I know like Steven is very opposite and likes to highlight in those types of things. was, was it automatic that you thought that you would do audible or did it come during like, you know, during the process or what were your thoughts around that? Valerie Garcia (59:47) No, my publisher basically told me I had to. I'd never listen to an audible in my life. I didn't even have audible. Ashley (59:54) my gosh. I'm just so glad that, you I love that it's your voice though, because I can stand listening to audibles of like someone else reading someone else's book. Like I could feel like yourself through it. So I really appreciate that. Valerie Garcia (1:00:04) Yeah. Well, so that was a question I asked about two years ago on Facebook when my publisher was like, all right, what are we doing about Audible? And I was like, do I have to? And she was like, yes. And so then I asked on Facebook, what do you guys think about audiobooks? And overwhelmingly, everyone's like, I like it when the author reads their own book. So was like, OK, I'm going to do this. And I'd never listened to an audiobook before. And I didn't even know there are some of music and intros and voices and audio. And so funny story, I recorded the audio book in my walk-in closet. True story. I have this microphone that's just out of the picture here. I have this small setup. I moved it all into my walk-in closet, set it up on my ironing board, brought my laptop in there, and the producer was on the other end of the line in a studio somewhere. I don't even know where. Ashley (1:00:43) you Valerie Garcia (1:01:03) And, you know, and over the course of three weeks, we worked together. I never met him. It's just his voice and my voice and we talked and yeah. And it was, it was a humbling experience because you're reading your own words. You're getting emotional or laughing. My cat meowed twice. We had to cut that out. Like it was a whole thing. It was very fancy ironing board in the closet, right? But, Ashley (1:01:26) I can relate. I can totally relate. Valerie Garcia (1:01:32) But it was actually, I really enjoyed it. It was fun. And when it was over, I was like, I could read audio books for a living. Like, it was actually kind of But it was, there's so many people that have said, I love listening to it because it's your voice. And so I highly recommend it. You know, it's an interesting experience. Ashley (1:01:39) Literally, your voice is great. Steven L Burch (1:01:41) Mm-hmm. That's awesome. So looking, looking back, now that you have went through this process, what would you, what would you do differently? Valerie Garcia (1:02:02) hmm. a really good experience. You know, I fought very hard for the title. The publisher wanted to change the title. And I fought for months. When I said, I really think this book is going to be called We're Gonna Need Cake, my publisher said, don't get too attached to that. I was like, no, I really think that that's the title. Like it needs to be me and it needs to be a little cheeky, but also I want it to be celebratory. And they were really worried about SEO and all the things that a publisher is paid to worry about. And so, you know, that's where this subtitle came from. So I don't know what I would do differently, but I am really glad I kind of fought for the ideas that felt the most authentic to me. There, you know, I wanted I was very specific in a couple of thoughts or, you know, there were a couple of things that I was like, this really matters to me. And I'm really thankful looking back that I had fought for those things. I took three months off at everything to really focus on writing a couple of the chapters. And I'm thankful I did that too, while that was difficult and, you know, a financial sacrifice, it was really important. I don't know, I think if I... I don't know about doing anything different. I'm excited about doing it again. I'm excited about writing another one. Yeah, I've already started an outline for the second one. think what I've learned is that there's no, I know this is cheesy because it's a chapter in the book, but there is no way to do it wrong. Whether you do a hybrid publisher or traditional or you publish it yourself or, Ashley (1:03:32) Just going to say, can we expect another one? Valerie Garcia (1:03:52) whatever you end up doing, putting your stories into the world, there's no way to do it wrong. So find the way that works the most authentically for you. Steven L Burch (1:03:58) I love that. So obviously there's a another book, but what's what's next from Valerie Garcia? What are we what are we gonna see? Valerie Garcia (1:04:12) I'm working on a few things. Yeah, I'm outlining the next book. I'm working with some really, really exciting clients right now. Really kind of focusing on authenticity in terms of AI. I think that's been a really interesting topic with a lot of my clients. You know, a lot of people don't think they can believe anything now. Ashley (1:04:14) Ha ha ha ha ha! Valerie Garcia (1:04:36) And I work with lot of higher education clients who are saying, you know, our students are coming in and they're just saying, you can't believe a word you hear anything you see on the internet. And, and what does that mean for the future of, of leadership and authenticity and really every, every facet of our, of our planet. So I'm kind of excited about that. And yeah, I'm launching a fun camp for January and I got a few things up my sleeve. Ashley (1:05:03) Awesome. Steven L Burch (1:05:04) Awesome. I love that. And then is like, I see some camp stuff with Scott Tanya. Is that correct? Is that okay? Valerie Garcia (1:05:04) Yeah. I think she's put that on hold till next year, but yeah, she's been working on putting, she's been putting together like an in-person summer camp, which is super fun. I've always wanted to do that, but yeah, I've been doing some virtual summer camps and I mean, the dream is, you know, always someday I just want to bring everybody together and do some canoeing and some campfires and you know, it'll happen these days. Steven L Burch (1:05:41) Let me know when that happens. Let's get us on the list. so perfect. I really, Ashley, before I close up, do you have any other questions or anything that you want to make sure that we get? Ashley (1:05:42) Yeah, we're down for that. Valerie Garcia (1:05:43) you Ashley (1:05:54) No, I'm just super, super thankful for your time and your input and really how meaningful the book has been for me personally and being able to share that with other people. think, you know, your impact is wide. Steven L Burch (1:06:05) It's huge. And I can't say enough how much you've impacted my life, how much this book has impacted my life. And thank you for being a beautiful human. And thank you for being true and authentic to yourself and continuing to challenge others around you to share their story and lift others up. Because at the end of the day, I think that this world is in a world of hurt and a lot of negativity. And if you can be a little bit of that light to Valerie Garcia (1:06:05) Thank you. Steven L Burch (1:06:34) you know, make somebody's day a little bit better. That's all we can do and continue to impact people's lives. So thank you for taking the time today to be here with us. And I'm sure we'll be asking you a lot of questions, being a part of your other programs that you're going to be doing. And as always, we're going to be the, your hugest cheerleaders for you. Valerie Garcia (1:06:55) thank you. Well, I can't be I can't wait to be an advanced reader for both of your books. I mean, count me in. Steven L Burch (1:07:02) Awesome. Thank you. Well, if anybody wanted to get a hold of you for anything of your services or booking for speaking or anything else, how would they get in contact with you? Valerie Garcia (1:07:12) Yep, super easy. My website is Valeri Garcia dot com. You'll find all my socials on there. Yeah, it's amazing to find. Steven L Burch (1:07:21) Perfect. Awesome. Well, thank you and go out and make the world a beautiful place. Thank you, ladies. Valerie Garcia (1:07:28) You too. Thank you all.