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Burning Secret - Stefan Zweig · True Tales of The Secret Service

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  Speaker 1: Chapter one of The Burning Secret. This is a LibriVox recording.
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  Speaker 1: All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more
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  Speaker 1: information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox dot org. Recording
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  Speaker 1: by Lee Smalley. The Burning Secret by Stefon Spige, Chapter one.
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  Speaker 1: The partner the train, with a shrill whistle, pulled into summering.
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  Speaker 1: For a moment, the black coaches stood still in the
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  Speaker 1: silvery light of the uplands, to eject a few vivid
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  Speaker 1: human figures and to swallow up others. Exacerbated voices called
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  Speaker 1: back and forth. Then with a puffing and a chugging,
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  Speaker 1: and another shrill shriek, the dark train clattered into the
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  Speaker 1: opening of the tunnel, and once more the landscape stretched
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  Speaker 1: before the view unbroken in all its wide expanse, the
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  Speaker 1: background swept clean by the moist wind. One of the arrivals,
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  Speaker 1: a young man pleasantly distinguished by his good dress and
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  Speaker 1: a lie plastic walk, hurried ahead of the others and
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  Speaker 1: entered one of the hotel buses. The horses took the
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  Speaker 1: steep road leisurely. Spring was in the air. Up in
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  Speaker 1: the sky floated the white, shifting clouds of May and
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  Speaker 1: June light, sportive young creatures playfully coursing the blue path
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  Speaker 1: of heaven, suddenly dipping and hiding behind the mountains, embracing
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  Speaker 1: and running away, crumpling up like handkerchiefs, elongating into gauzy scarfs,
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  Speaker 1: and ending their play by roguishly perching white caps on
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  Speaker 1: the mountain tops. There was unrest below, too, in the wind,
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  Speaker 1: which shook the lean trees, still wet from the rain,
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  Speaker 1: and set their limbs a groaning softly, and brought down
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  Speaker 1: a thousand shining drops. Sometimes a cool breath of snow
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  Speaker 1: descended from the mountains, and then there was a feel
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  Speaker 1: in the air, both bomby and cutting. All things in
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  Speaker 1: the atmosphere and on the earth were in motion and
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  Speaker 1: astir with the ferment of impatience. The horses tossed their
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  Speaker 1: heads and snorted as they now trotted down a descent,
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  Speaker 1: the sound of their bells jingling far ahead of them.
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  Speaker 1: On Arriving at the hotel, the young man made straight
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  Speaker 1: for the registry and looked over the list of guests.
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  Speaker 1: He was disappointed. What the deuce have I come for?
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  Speaker 1: He thought, in vexation, Stuck way up here on top
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  Speaker 1: of the mountain, all alone, no company. Why it's worse
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  Speaker 1: than the office. I must have come either too early
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  Speaker 1: or too late. I never do have luck with my holidays.
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  Speaker 1: Not a single name do I know? If only there
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  Speaker 1: was a woman or two here to pick up a
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  Speaker 1: flirtation with, even a perfectly innocent one, if it must
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  Speaker 1: be just to keep the week from being too utterly dismal.
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  Speaker 1: The young man, a baron not very high up in
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  Speaker 1: the country's nobility, held a government position, and had secured
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  Speaker 1: this short vacation not because he required it particularly, but
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  Speaker 1: because his colleagues had all got a week off in spring,
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  Speaker 1: and he saw no reason for making a present of
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  Speaker 1: his week off to the government. Although not without inner resources,
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  Speaker 1: he was a thoroughly social being, his sociability being the
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  Speaker 1: very quality for which his friends liked him and for
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  Speaker 1: which he was welcomed in all circles. He was quite
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  Speaker 1: conscious of his inability to stay by himself, and had
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  Speaker 1: no inclination to meet himself, as it were, but rather
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  Speaker 1: avoided his own company, Feeling not the least urged to
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  Speaker 1: become intimately acquainted with his own soul. He knew he
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  Speaker 1: required contact with other human beings to kindle his talents
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  Speaker 1: and stir up the warmth and exuberance of his spirits. Alone,
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  Speaker 1: he was like a match in a box, frosty and useless.
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  Speaker 1: He paced up and down the hall, completely out of sorts,
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  Speaker 1: stopping now and then irresolutely to turn the leaves of
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  Speaker 1: the magazines, or to glance at the newspapers, or to
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  Speaker 1: strike up a waltz on the piano in the music room. Finally,
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  Speaker 1: he sat down in a sulk and watched the growing
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  Speaker 1: dusk and the gray mist steel in patches between the
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  Speaker 1: fir trees. For a long, vain, fretful hour, he took
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  Speaker 1: refuge in the dining room. As yet only a few
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  Speaker 1: of the tables were occupied. He took them in at
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  Speaker 1: a swift glance. No use, no one he knew, except
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  Speaker 1: he responded to the greeting listlessly, a gentleman to whom
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  Speaker 1: he had spoken on the train, and farther off, the
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  Speaker 1: familiar face from the metropolis. No one else, not a
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  Speaker 1: single woman, to promise even a momentary adventure. He became
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  Speaker 1: more and more impatient and out of sorts. Being a
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  Speaker 1: young man favored with a handsome face, he was always
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  Speaker 1: prepared for a new experience. He was of the sort
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  Speaker 1: of men who were constantly on the lookout for an
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  Speaker 1: opportunity to plunge into an adventure for the sake of
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  Speaker 1: its novelty, yet whom nothing surprises, because forever lying in wait,
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  Speaker 1: they have calculated every possibility in advance. Such men never
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  Speaker 1: overlook any element of the erotic. The very first glance
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  Speaker 1: they cast at a woman is a probe into the sensual,
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  Speaker 1: a searching, impartial probe that knows no distinction between the
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  Speaker 1: wife of a friend or the maid who opens the
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  Speaker 1: door to her house. One rarely realizes, in using the
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  Speaker 1: ready made word woman hunter, which we toss in contempt
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  Speaker 1: at such men, how true the expression is, and how
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  Speaker 1: much of faithful observation it implies. In their watchful alertness,
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  Speaker 1: all the passionate instincts of the chase are afire, the stalking,
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  Speaker 1: the excitement, the cruel cunning. They are always at their post,
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  Speaker 1: always ready and determined to follow the tracks of an
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  Speaker 1: adventure up to the very brink of the precipice, always
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  Speaker 1: loaded with passion, not with the passion of a lover,
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  Speaker 1: but with the cold, calculating, dangerous passion of a gambler.
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  Speaker 1: Some of them are doggedly persevering their whole life shaping
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  Speaker 1: itself from this expectancy into one perpetual adventure. Each day
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  Speaker 1: is divided for them into a hundred little sensual experiences,
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  Speaker 1: the passing look, a flitting smile, an accidental contact of
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  Speaker 1: the and each year into a hundred such days, in
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  Speaker 1: which the sensual experience constitutes the ever flowing, life giving
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  Speaker 1: and quickening source of their existence. There was no partner
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  Speaker 1: for a game here that the baron's experienced eye instantly detected.
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  Speaker 1: And there is nothing more exasperating than for a player
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  Speaker 1: with cards in his hands, conscious of his ability to
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  Speaker 1: be sitting at the green table vainly awaiting a partner.
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  Speaker 1: The baron called for a newspaper, but merely ran his
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  Speaker 1: eyes down the columns fretfully. His thoughts were crippled, and
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  Speaker 1: he stumbled over the words. Suddenly he heard the rustling
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  Speaker 1: of a dress, and a woman's voice saying, in a
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  Speaker 1: slightly vexed tone, may take toy donk edgar. Her accent
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  Speaker 1: was affected A tall, voluptuous figure and silk crackled by
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  Speaker 1: his table, followed by a small, pale boy in a
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  Speaker 1: black velvet suit. The boy eyed the baron curiously as
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  Speaker 1: the two seated themselves at a table reserved for them
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  Speaker 1: opposite to him, The child was making evident efforts to
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  Speaker 1: be correct in his behavior, but propriety seemed to be
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  Speaker 1: out of keeping with the dark, restless expression of his eyes.
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  Speaker 1: The lady, the young man's attention was fixed upon her only,
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  Speaker 1: was very much betoileted and dressed with conspicuous elegance. She
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  Speaker 1: was a type that particularly appealed to the baron, A
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  Speaker 1: jewess with a somewhat opulent figure, close to though not
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  Speaker 1: yet arrived at the borderline of overmaturity, and evidently of
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  Speaker 1: a passionate nature like his, yet sufficiently experienced to hide
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  Speaker 1: her temperament behind a veil of dignified melancholy. He could
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  Speaker 1: not see her eyes, but was able to admire the
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  Speaker 1: lovely curve of her eyebrows, arching clean and well defined,
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  Speaker 1: above a nose delicate yet nobly curved, and giving her
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  Speaker 1: face distinction. It was her nose that betrayed her race.
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  Speaker 1: Her hair, in keeping with everything else about her, was
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  Speaker 1: remarkably luxuriant. Her beauty seemed to have grown sated and boastful,
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  Speaker 1: with the sure sense of the wealth of admiration. It
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  Speaker 1: had evoked. She gave her order in a very low voice,
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  Speaker 1: and told the boy to stop making a noise with
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  Speaker 1: his fork. This with apparent indifference to the Baron's cautious,
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  Speaker 1: stealthy gaze. She seemed not to observe his look, though
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  Speaker 1: as a matter of fact, it was his keen, alert
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  Speaker 1: vigilance that had made her constrained. The flash lit up
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  Speaker 1: the gloom of the baron's face. His nerves responded as
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  Speaker 1: to an underground current, His muscles tautened, his figure straightened up.
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  Speaker 1: Fire came to his eyes. He was not unlike the
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  Speaker 1: women who require a masculine presence to bring out their
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  Speaker 1: full powers. He needed the stimulation of sex completely to
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  Speaker 1: energize his faculties. The hunter in him scented the prey.
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  Speaker 1: His eyes tried to challenge hers, and her glance crossed his,
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  Speaker 1: but waveringly, without ever, giving an occasional relaxation of the
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  Speaker 1: muscles round her mouth, as if in an incipient smile.
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  Speaker 1: But he was not sure, and the very uncertainty of
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  Speaker 1: it aroused him. The one thing that held out promise
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  Speaker 1: was her constant looking away from him, which argued both
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  Speaker 1: resistance and embarrassment. Then, too, the conversation that she kept
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  Speaker 1: up with her child encouraged him, being obviously designed for show,
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  Speaker 1: while her outward calm, he felt, was forced and quite superficial,
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  Speaker 1: actually indicating the commencement of inner agitation. He was a quiver.
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  Speaker 1: The play had begun. He made his dinner last a
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  Speaker 1: long while, and for a full half hour, almost steadily,
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  Speaker 1: he kept the woman fixed with his gaze until it
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  Speaker 1: had traveled over every line of her face and touched
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  Speaker 1: unseen every spot of her body. Outside, the darkness fell heavily.
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  Speaker 1: The woods groaned, as if in childish fear of the
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  Speaker 1: large rain laden clouds, stretching out gray hands after them.
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  Speaker 1: The shadows deepened in the room, and the silence seemed
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  Speaker 1: to pressed the people closer together under the dead weight
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  Speaker 1: of the stillness. The baron clearly noted that the mother's
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  Speaker 1: conversation with her son became still more constrained and artificial,
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  Speaker 1: and would soon, he was sure, cease altogether. He resolved
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  Speaker 1: upon an experiment. He rose and went to the door, slowly,
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  Speaker 1: looking past the woman at the prospect outside. At the door,
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  Speaker 1: he gave a quick turn, as if he had forgotten something,
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  Speaker 1: and caught her looking at him with keen interest that
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  Speaker 1: titillated him. He waited in the hall. Presently she appeared,
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  Speaker 1: holding the boy's hand, and paused for a while to
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  Speaker 1: look through some magazines and show the child a few pictures.
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  Speaker 1: The baron walked up to the table with a casual air,
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  Speaker 1: pretending to hunt for a periodical. His real intention was
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  Speaker 1: to probe deeper below the moist sheen of her eyes
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  Speaker 1: and perhaps even begin a conversation. The woman instantly turned
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  Speaker 1: away and tapped the boy's shoulderviont edgar. She rustled past
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  Speaker 1: the baron. He followed her with his eyes somewhat disappointed.
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  Speaker 1: He had counted upon making the acquaintance that very evening.
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  Speaker 1: Her brusque manner was disconcerting. However, there was a fascination
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  Speaker 1: in her resistance, and the very uncertainty added zest to
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  Speaker 1: the chase. At all events, he had found a partner,
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  Speaker 1: and the play could begin. End of chapter one, chapter
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  Speaker 1: two of The Burning Secret by Stefan Speig. This LibriVox
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  Speaker 1: recording is in the public domain. Chapter two, Quick Friendship.
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  Speaker 1: The next morning, on entering the hall, the baron saw
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  Speaker 1: the son of the beautiful Unknown engaged in an eager
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  Speaker 1: conversation with the two elevator boys to whom he was
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  Speaker 1: showing pictures in a book by du Chadieux. His mother
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  Speaker 1: was not with him, probably not have come down from
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  Speaker 1: her room yet. The baron took his first good look
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  Speaker 1: at the boy. He seemed to be a shy, undeveloped,
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  Speaker 1: nervous little fellow about twelve years old. His movements were jerky,
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  Speaker 1: his eyes dark and restless, and he made the impression
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  Speaker 1: so often produced by children of his age, of being scared,
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  Speaker 1: as if he had just been roused out of sleep
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  Speaker 1: and placed in strange surroundings. His face was not unbeautiful,
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  Speaker 1: but still quite undecided. The struggle between childhood and young
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  Speaker 1: manhood seemed just about to be setting in. Everything in
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  Speaker 1: him so far was like doe that had been needed
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  Speaker 1: but not formed into a loaf. Nothing was expressed in
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  Speaker 1: clean lines. Everything was blurred and unsettled. He was at
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  Speaker 1: that hobbledyhoy age when clothes do not fit, and sleeves
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  Speaker 1: and trousers hang slouchily, and there is no vanity to
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  Speaker 1: prompt care of one's appearance. The child made a rather
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  Speaker 1: pitiful impression as he wandered at the hotel aimlessly. He
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  Speaker 1: got in everybody's way. He would plague the porter with
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  Speaker 1: questions and then be shoved aside, for he would stand
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  Speaker 1: in the doorway and obstruct the passage. Apparently there were
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  Speaker 1: no other children for him to play with, and in
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  Speaker 1: his child's need for prattle, he would try to attach
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  Speaker 1: himself to one or other of the hotel attendants. When
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  Speaker 1: they had time, they would answer him, but the instant
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  Speaker 1: an adult came along, they would stop talking and refuse
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  Speaker 1: to pay any more attention to him. It interested the
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  Speaker 1: baron to watch the child, and he looked on, smiling
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  Speaker 1: as the unhappy little creature inspected everything and everybody curiously,
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  Speaker 1: while he himself was universally avoided as a nuisance. Once
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  Speaker 1: the baron intercepted one of his curious looks, his black
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  Speaker 1: eyes instantly fell when he saw himself observed, and hid
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  Speaker 1: behind lowered lids. The baron was amused. The boy actually
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  Speaker 1: began to interest him, and it flashed into his mind
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  Speaker 1: that he might be made to serve as the speediest
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  Speaker 1: means for bringing him and his mother together. He could
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  Speaker 1: overcome his shyness, since it proceeded from nothing but fear.
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  Speaker 1: At any rate, it was worth the trial. So when
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  Speaker 1: Edgar strolled out of the door to pet in his
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  Speaker 1: child's need of tenderness the pinkish nostrils of one of
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  Speaker 1: the bus horses. The baron followed him. Edgar was certainly unlucky.
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  Speaker 1: The driver chased him away rather roughly. Insulted and bored,
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  Speaker 1: he stood about aimlessly again with a vacant, rather melancholy
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  Speaker 1: expression in his eyes. The baron now addressed him, Well,
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  Speaker 1: young man, how do you like it here? He attempted
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  Speaker 1: a tone of jovial ease. The child turned fairly purple
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  Speaker 1: and looked up in actual alarm, drawing his arms close
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  Speaker 1: to his body and twisting and turning in embarrassment. For
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  Speaker 1: the first time in his life, a stranger was the
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  Speaker 1: one to address him, and not he. The stranger, oh
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  Speaker 1: managed to stammer out, choking over the last words, thank you.
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  Speaker 1: I like it you do. I'm surprised. The baron laughed.
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  Speaker 1: It's a dull place, especially for a young man like you.
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  Speaker 1: What do you do with yourself all day long? Edgar
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  Speaker 1: was still too confused to give a ready answer. Could
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  Speaker 1: it be true that this stranger, this elegant gentleman, was
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  Speaker 1: trying to pick up a conversation with him, with him,
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  Speaker 1: whom nobody had ever cared to rap about. It made
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  Speaker 1: him both shy and proud. He pulled himself together with difficulty.
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  Speaker 1: I read and we do a lot of walking. Sometimes
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  Speaker 1: we go out driving, mother and I I am here
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  Speaker 1: to get well. I was sick. I must be out
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  Speaker 1: in the sunshine a lot, the doctor said. Edgar spoke
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  Speaker 1: the last with greater assurance. Children are always proud of
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  Speaker 1: their ailments. The danger they are in makes them more important,
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  Speaker 1: they know in the eyes of their elders. Yes, the
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  Speaker 1: sun is good for you. It will tan your cheeks.
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  Speaker 1: But you oughtn't to be standing round the whole day long.
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  Speaker 1: A fellow like you ought to be on the go, running, jumping, playing,
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  Speaker 1: full of spirits, and up to mischief too. It strikes
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  Speaker 1: me you are too good with that big fat book
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  Speaker 1: under your arm. You look as though you were always
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  Speaker 1: poking in the house by jingo. When I think of
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  Speaker 1: the kind of fellow I was at your age, I
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  Speaker 1: used to raise the devil, and every evening I came
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  Speaker 1: home with torn knickerbockers. Don't be so good, whatever you are.
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  Speaker 1: Edgar could not help smiling, and the consciousness of his
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  Speaker 1: own smile removed his fear. Now he was anxious to
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  Speaker 1: say something in reply, but it seemed self assertive and
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  Speaker 1: impudent to answer this affable stranger who spoke to him
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  Speaker 1: in such a friendly way. He never had been forward
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  Speaker 1: and was easily abashed, so that now he was in
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  Speaker 1: the greatest embarrassment from sheer happiness and shame. He would
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  Speaker 1: have liked to continue the conversation, but nothing occurred to him. Luckily,
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  Speaker 1: the great yellow Saint Bernard, belonging to the hotel, came
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  Speaker 1: up and sniffed at both of them, and allowed himself
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  Speaker 1: to be petted. Do you like dogs, asked the baron, Oh,
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  Speaker 1: very much. Grandma has one in her villa at Baines
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  Speaker 1: when we stopped there. He stays with me the whole time,
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  Speaker 1: but that's only in the summer when we go visiting.
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  Speaker 1: We have a lot of dogs at home on our estate,
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  Speaker 1: a full two dozen. I believe if you behave yourself here,
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  Speaker 1: I'll make you a present of one brown with white ears,
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  Speaker 1: a pup. Still, would you like to have it? The
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  Speaker 1: child turned scarlet with joy. I should say so. The
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  Speaker 1: words fairly burst from his lips in an access of eagerness.
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  Speaker 1: Then he caught himself up and stammered in distress and
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  Speaker 1: as if frightened. But mother won't allow me to have
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  Speaker 1: a dog, she says, she won't keep a dog in
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  Speaker 1: the house. It's too much of a nuisance. The baron
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  Speaker 1: and smiled. The conversation had at last come round to
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  Speaker 1: the mother. Is your mother so strict? The child pondered
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  Speaker 1: and looked up for an instant, as if to find
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  Speaker 1: out whether the stranger was to be trusted on such
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  Speaker 1: slight acquaintance. No, he finally answered, caartiously, she's not strict. Then,
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  Speaker 1: since I've been sick, she lets me do anything I want.
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  Speaker 1: Maybe she'll even let me keep a dog, shall I
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  Speaker 1: ask her? Oh? Yes, please do, Edgar cried delightedly. If
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  Speaker 1: you do, I'm sure she'll give in. What does he
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  Speaker 1: look like? White ears? You said? Can he do any tricks? Yet? Yes,
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  Speaker 1: all sorts of tricks. The baron had to smile at
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  Speaker 1: the sparkle of Edgar's eyes. It had been so easy
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  Speaker 1: to kindle that light in them. All at once, the
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  Speaker 1: child's constraint dropped away, and all his emotionalism kept in
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  Speaker 1: check till then by fear bubbled over in a flash.
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  Speaker 1: The shy, intimidated child of a minute before turned into
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  Speaker 1: a boisterous lad. If only his mother is transformed so quickly,
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  Speaker 1: the baron thought, if only she shows so much ardor
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  Speaker 1: behind her reserve, Edgar went at him with a thousand questions.
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  Speaker 1: What's the dog's name, Carow Carrow, he cried, happily, somehow
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  Speaker 1: having to answer every word with a laugh of delight.
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  Speaker 1: So intoxicated was he with the unexpectedness of having some
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  Speaker 1: one take him up as a friend. The baron, amazed
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  Speaker 1: at his own quick success, resolved to strike while the
• 19:35
  Speaker 1: iron was hot and invited the boy to take a
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  Speaker 1: walk with him. This put Edgar, who for weeks had
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  Speaker 1: been starving for company, into a fever of ecstasy. During
• 19:46
  Speaker 1: the walk, the baron questioned him, as if quite by
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  Speaker 1: the way, about a number of apparent trifles, and Edgar,
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  Speaker 1: in response, blurted out all the information he was seeking,
• 19:56
  Speaker 1: telling him everything he wanted to know about the family.
• 20:00
  Speaker 1: Edgar was the only son of a lawyer in the
• 20:02
  Speaker 1: metropolis who evidently came of a wealthy, middle class Jewish family.
• 20:07
  Speaker 1: By clever roundabout inquiries, the baron promptly elicited that Edgar's
• 20:12
  Speaker 1: mother had expressed herself as by no means delighted with
• 20:15
  Speaker 1: her stay in summering, and had complained of the lack
• 20:19
  Speaker 1: of congenial company. He even felt he might infer from
• 20:22
  Speaker 1: the evasive way in which Edgar answered his question as
• 20:26
  Speaker 1: to whether his mother wasn't very fond of his father,
• 20:29
  Speaker 1: that their marital relations were none of the happiest. He
• 20:32
  Speaker 1: was almost ashamed at having been able to extract these
• 20:36
  Speaker 1: family secrets from the unsuspecting child. For Edgar, very proud
• 20:40
  Speaker 1: that anything he had to say could interest a grown
• 20:43
  Speaker 1: up person, fairly pressed confidences upon his new friend. His
• 20:48
  Speaker 1: child's heart beat with pride. The baron had put his
• 20:51
  Speaker 1: arm on his shoulder while they were walking, to be
• 20:54
  Speaker 1: seen in such close intimacy with a man, and gradually
• 20:58
  Speaker 1: he forgot he was a child, and talked quite unconstrainedly,
• 21:02
  Speaker 1: as if to an equal. From his conversation it was
• 21:06
  Speaker 1: quite clear that he was a bright boy, in fact,
• 21:09
  Speaker 1: a bit too precocious as our most sickly children who
• 21:13
  Speaker 1: spend much time with their elders, and his likes and
• 21:16
  Speaker 1: dislikes were too marked. He took nothing calmly or indifferently.
• 21:21
  Speaker 1: Every person or thing was discussed with either passionate enthusiasm
• 21:25
  Speaker 1: or a hatred so intense as to distort his face
• 21:29
  Speaker 1: into a mean, ugly look. There was something wild and
• 21:32
  Speaker 1: jerky about his manner, accentuated perhaps by the illness he
• 21:36
  Speaker 1: was just recovering from, which gave his talk the fieriness
• 21:40
  Speaker 1: of fanaticism. His awkwardness seemed to proceed from the painfully
• 21:45
  Speaker 1: suppressed fear of his own passion. Before the end of
• 21:49
  Speaker 1: half an hour, the baron was already holding the boy's
• 21:52
  Speaker 1: throbbing heart in his hands. It is so infinitely easy
• 21:56
  Speaker 1: to deceive children, those unsuspecting creatures whose life love is
• 22:00
  Speaker 1: so rarely courted. All the baron needed to do was
• 22:04
  Speaker 1: to transport himself back to his own childhood, and the
• 22:07
  Speaker 1: talk flowed quite naturally. Edgar felt himself in the presence
• 22:11
  Speaker 1: of an equal, and within a few minutes had lost
• 22:14
  Speaker 1: all sense of distance between them, and was perfectly at ease,
• 22:18
  Speaker 1: conscious of nothing but bliss at having so unexpectedly found
• 22:22
  Speaker 1: a friend in this lonely place. And what a friend.
• 22:26
  Speaker 1: Forgotten were all his mates in the city where he lived,
• 22:29
  Speaker 1: those little boys with their thin voices and inexperienced chatter.
• 22:34
  Speaker 1: This one hour had almost expunged their faces. All his
• 22:38
  Speaker 1: enthusiasm and passion now belonged to this big friend of his.
• 22:43
  Speaker 1: On parting, the baron invited him to take a walk
• 22:46
  Speaker 1: with him again the next morning. Edgar's heart expanded with pride,
• 22:51
  Speaker 1: and when, from a little distance away, the baron waved
• 22:55
  Speaker 1: back to him like a real playmate, it was probably
• 22:58
  Speaker 1: the happiest moment in his life. It is so easy
• 23:01
  Speaker 1: to deceive children, the baron smiled as he looked after
• 23:05
  Speaker 1: the boy dashing away. The go between had been one Edgar,
• 23:10
  Speaker 1: he knew, would bore his mother with stories of the
• 23:13
  Speaker 1: wonderful Baron, and would repeat every word he had said.
• 23:17
  Speaker 1: At this he recalled complacently how cleverly he had woven
• 23:21
  Speaker 1: in some compliments for the mother's consumption. Your beautiful mother,
• 23:25
  Speaker 1: he had always said. There was not the faintest shadow
• 23:29
  Speaker 1: of doubt in his mind that the communicative boy would
• 23:32
  Speaker 1: never rest until he had brought him and his mother together.
• 23:36
  Speaker 1: No need now to stir a finger in order to
• 23:38
  Speaker 1: shorten the distance between himself and the lovely unknown. He
• 23:43
  Speaker 1: could dream away idly and feast his eyes on the landscape.
• 23:46
  Speaker 1: For a child's eager hands, he knew were building the
• 23:50
  Speaker 1: bridge for him to her heart. End of chapter two,
• 24:00
  Speaker 1: Chapter three of The Burning Secret by Stefan Schweig. This
• 24:05
  Speaker 1: LibriVox recording is in the public domain. Chapter three the trio.
• 24:12
  Speaker 1: The plan, as appeared only an hour later, proved to
• 24:15
  Speaker 1: be excellent. It worked without a hitch. The baron chose
• 24:19
  Speaker 1: to be a little late in entering the dining room,
• 24:21
  Speaker 1: and when Edgar saw him, he jumped up from his
• 24:24
  Speaker 1: seat and gave him an eager nod and a beatific smile,
• 24:28
  Speaker 1: at the same time pulling his mother's sleeve, saying something
• 24:31
  Speaker 1: to her hastily, and pointing conspicuously to the baron. His
• 24:36
  Speaker 1: mother reproved him for his demonstrativeness. She blushed and showed
• 24:40
  Speaker 1: genuine discomfort, but could not help yielding to the boy's insistence,
• 24:45
  Speaker 1: and gave a glance across at the baron. This the
• 24:48
  Speaker 1: baron instantly seized upon as the pretext for a deferential bow.
• 24:53
  Speaker 1: The acquaintance was made. The lady had to acknowledge his bow.
• 24:57
  Speaker 1: Yet from now on she kept her head bent so
• 25:00
  Speaker 1: still lower over her plate, and threw out the rest
• 25:02
  Speaker 1: of the meal, seduously avoided looking over at the baron again.
• 25:07
  Speaker 1: Not so Edgar. Every minute or two he turned his
• 25:10
  Speaker 1: eyes on the baron, and once he even tried to
• 25:13
  Speaker 1: speak to him across the two tables, an impropriety which
• 25:17
  Speaker 1: his mother promptly checked with a severe rebuke. As soon
• 25:21
  Speaker 1: as dinner was over, Edgar was told he must go
• 25:24
  Speaker 1: straight to bed, and an eager whispering began between him
• 25:27
  Speaker 1: and his mother, which resulted in a concession to the boy.
• 25:31
  Speaker 1: He was allowed to go to the baron and say
• 25:33
  Speaker 1: good night to him. The baron said a few kind words,
• 25:37
  Speaker 1: and so set the child's eyes ablaze again. Here the
• 25:42
  Speaker 1: baron rose, and, in his adroit way, as if it
• 25:45
  Speaker 1: were the most natural thing in the world, stepped over
• 25:48
  Speaker 1: to the other table, and congratulated his neighbor upon her bright,
• 25:52
  Speaker 1: intelligent son. He told her what a pleasant time he
• 25:55
  Speaker 1: had spent with him that morning. Edgar beamed, and then
• 25:59
  Speaker 1: inquired about the boy's health. On this point, he asked
• 26:03
  Speaker 1: so many detailed questions that the mother was compelled to reply,
• 26:07
  Speaker 1: and so was drawn irresistibly into a conversation. Edgar listened
• 26:12
  Speaker 1: to it all in a sort of rapturous awe. The
• 26:15
  Speaker 1: baron gave his name to the lady. The high sound
• 26:18
  Speaker 1: of it, it seemed to him, made an impression on her.
• 26:22
  Speaker 1: At any rate, she lost her extreme reserve, though retaining
• 26:25
  Speaker 1: perfect dignity. In a few minutes. She took leave on
• 26:29
  Speaker 1: account of Edgar's having to go to bed, as she
• 26:32
  Speaker 1: said by way of a pretext. Edgar protested he was
• 26:36
  Speaker 1: not sleepy and would be happy to stay up the
• 26:38
  Speaker 1: whole night, but his mother remained obdurate and held out
• 26:42
  Speaker 1: her hand by way of good night to the baron
• 26:44
  Speaker 1: who shook hands with her most respectfully. Edgar did not
• 26:48
  Speaker 1: sleep well that night. A chaos of happiness and childish
• 26:52
  Speaker 1: despair filled his soul. Something new had come to him
• 26:56
  Speaker 1: that day. For the first time, he had played a
• 26:59
  Speaker 1: part in the life of adults. In his half awake state,
• 27:03
  Speaker 1: he forgot that he was a child, and all at
• 27:05
  Speaker 1: once felt himself a grown man, brought up an only
• 27:09
  Speaker 1: child and often ailing. He had never had many friends,
• 27:13
  Speaker 1: his parents who paid little attention to him, and the
• 27:16
  Speaker 1: servants had been the only ones to meet his craving
• 27:18
  Speaker 1: for tenderness. The power of love is not properly gaged
• 27:23
  Speaker 1: if it is estimated only by the object that inspires it,
• 27:26
  Speaker 1: If the tension preceding it is not taken into account
• 27:30
  Speaker 1: that gloomy space of disillusionment and loneliness which stretches in
• 27:34
  Speaker 1: front of all the great events of the heart. In Edgar,
• 27:38
  Speaker 1: there had been a heavily fraught, unexpended emotion lying in wait,
• 27:42
  Speaker 1: which now burst out and rushed to meet the first
• 27:45
  Speaker 1: human being who seemed to deserve it. He lay in
• 27:48
  Speaker 1: the dark, happy and dazed. He wanted to laugh, but
• 27:51
  Speaker 1: had to cry, for he loved the baron as he
• 27:54
  Speaker 1: had never loved friend, father, mother, or even God. All
• 27:58
  Speaker 1: the immature passion of his ending boyhood wreathed itself about
• 28:02
  Speaker 1: his mental vision of the man whose very name had
• 28:05
  Speaker 1: been unknown to him a few hours before. He was
• 28:09
  Speaker 1: wise enough not to be disturbed by the peculiar, unexpected
• 28:13
  Speaker 1: way in which the new friendship had been formed. What
• 28:16
  Speaker 1: troubled him was the sense of his own unworthiness and insignificance.
• 28:21
  Speaker 1: Am I fit company for him? He plagued himself. I
• 28:24
  Speaker 1: a little boy twelve years old who has to go
• 28:27
  Speaker 1: to school still, and am sent off to bed at
• 28:30
  Speaker 1: night before anyone else. What can I mean to him?
• 28:33
  Speaker 1: What have I to offer him? The painful sense of
• 28:37
  Speaker 1: his impotence to show his feelings in some way or
• 28:39
  Speaker 1: other made him most unhappy. On other occasions, when he
• 28:44
  Speaker 1: had taken a liking to a boy, the first thing
• 28:46
  Speaker 1: he had done was to offer to share his stamps
• 28:49
  Speaker 1: and marbles and jacks. Now such childish possessions, which only
• 28:54
  Speaker 1: the day before had still had vast importance and charm
• 28:57
  Speaker 1: in his eyes, had depreciated in vatue they seemed silly.
• 29:02
  Speaker 1: He disdained them. He couldn't offer such things to his
• 29:05
  Speaker 1: new friend. What possible way was there for him to
• 29:09
  Speaker 1: express his feelings. The sense that he was small, only
• 29:13
  Speaker 1: half a being, a mere child of twelve, grew upon
• 29:16
  Speaker 1: him and tortured him more and more. Never before had
• 29:20
  Speaker 1: he so vehemently cursed his childhood, or longed so heartily
• 29:24
  Speaker 1: to wake up in the morning the person he had
• 29:26
  Speaker 1: always dreamed of being, a man, big and strong, grown
• 29:30
  Speaker 1: up like the others. His restless thoughts were mixed with
• 29:34
  Speaker 1: the first bright dreams of the new world of manhood.
• 29:38
  Speaker 1: Finally he fell asleep with a smile on his lips,
• 29:41
  Speaker 1: but his sleep was constantly broken by the anticipation of
• 29:45
  Speaker 1: the next morning's appointment. At seven o'clock, he awoke with
• 29:49
  Speaker 1: a start, fearful that he was too late already. He
• 29:52
  Speaker 1: dressed hastily and astonished his mother when he went in
• 29:55
  Speaker 1: to say good morning, because she had always had difficulty
• 29:59
  Speaker 1: getting him out of Before she could question him. He
• 30:02
  Speaker 1: was out of her room again, with only the one
• 30:05
  Speaker 1: thought in his mind not to keep his friend waiting.
• 30:08
  Speaker 1: He dawdled about downstairs in the hotel, even forgetting to
• 30:12
  Speaker 1: eat breakfast. At half past nine, the baron came sauntering
• 30:17
  Speaker 1: down the lobby with his easy air and no indication
• 30:20
  Speaker 1: that anything had been troubling him. He of course had
• 30:24
  Speaker 1: completely forgotten the appointment for a walk, but he acted
• 30:27
  Speaker 1: as though he were quite ready to keep his promise.
• 30:30
  Speaker 1: When the boy came rushing at him so eagerly he
• 30:33
  Speaker 1: took Edgar's arm and paced up and down the lobby
• 30:36
  Speaker 1: with him leisurely. Edgar was radiant, although the baron gently
• 30:41
  Speaker 1: but firmly refused to start on the walk at once.
• 30:44
  Speaker 1: He seemed to be waiting for something. Every once in
• 30:47
  Speaker 1: a while he gave a nervous glance at one of
• 30:49
  Speaker 1: the various doors. Suddenly he drew himself up. Edgar's mother
• 30:54
  Speaker 1: had entered the hall. She responded to the baron's greeting
• 30:58
  Speaker 1: and came up to him with a pleasant excis expression
• 31:00
  Speaker 1: on her face. Edgar had not told her about the walk,
• 31:04
  Speaker 1: it was too precious a thing to talk about. But
• 31:07
  Speaker 1: now the baron mentioned it, and she smiled in approval.
• 31:10
  Speaker 1: Then he went on to invite her to come along,
• 31:13
  Speaker 1: and she was not slow in accepting. That made Edgar sulky.
• 31:18
  Speaker 1: He gnawed at his lips. How provoking of his mother
• 31:21
  Speaker 1: to have come into the lobby just then. The walk
• 31:24
  Speaker 1: belonged to him and him alone. To be sure, he
• 31:27
  Speaker 1: had introduced his friend to his mother, but only out
• 31:30
  Speaker 1: of courtesy. He had not meant to share him with anybody.
• 31:34
  Speaker 1: Something like jealousy began to stir in him when he
• 31:37
  Speaker 1: observed the baron's friendliness to his mother on the walk.
• 31:41
  Speaker 1: The dangerous sense the child had of his importance and
• 31:44
  Speaker 1: sudden rise to prominence was heightened by the interest the
• 31:48
  Speaker 1: two adults showed in him. He was almost the exclusive
• 31:52
  Speaker 1: subject of their conversation. His mother expressed rather hypocritical solicitude
• 31:57
  Speaker 1: on account of his pallor and nervousness, while the baron
• 32:01
  Speaker 1: kept saying it was nothing to worry about, and extolled
• 32:04
  Speaker 1: his young friends, good manners and pleasant ways. It was
• 32:08
  Speaker 1: the happiest hour of Edgar's life. Writes were granted him
• 32:12
  Speaker 1: that he had never before been allowed. He was permitted
• 32:15
  Speaker 1: to take part in the conversation without a prompt keep
• 32:18
  Speaker 1: quiet Edgar. He could even express bold desires for which
• 32:23
  Speaker 1: he would have been rebuked before. No wonder, the deceptive
• 32:26
  Speaker 1: feeling that he was grown up began to flourish in
• 32:29
  Speaker 1: his imagination, in his bright dreams. Childhood already lay behind
• 32:34
  Speaker 1: him like a suit he had outgrown and cast off.
• 32:38
  Speaker 1: At the mother's invitation, the baron took his midday meal
• 32:41
  Speaker 1: at their table. She was growing friendlier all the time.
• 32:45
  Speaker 1: The vizave was now a companion, the acquaintanceship of friendship.
• 32:49
  Speaker 1: The trio was in full swing, and the three voices,
• 32:53
  Speaker 1: the woman's, the man's, and the child's, mingled in harmony.
• 32:58
  Speaker 1: End of chapter three, Chapter four of The Burning Secret
• 33:07
  Speaker 1: by Steffan Schweig. This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 33:13
  Speaker 1: Chapter four, the attack. The impatient hunter felt the time
• 33:18
  Speaker 1: had come to creep up on his game. The three
• 33:21
  Speaker 1: sidedness of the sport annoyed him, and so did the
• 33:23
  Speaker 1: tone of it. To sit there and chat was rather pleasant,
• 33:27
  Speaker 1: but he was after more than mere talk social intercourse.
• 33:31
  Speaker 1: With the mask it puts over desire. Always, he knew,
• 33:35
  Speaker 1: retards the erotic between man and woman, words lose their
• 33:39
  Speaker 1: ardor the attack its fire. Despite their conversation together on
• 33:44
  Speaker 1: indifferent matters, Edgar's mother must never forget his real object,
• 33:48
  Speaker 1: of which he was quite convinced. She was already aware
• 33:52
  Speaker 1: that his efforts to catch this woman were not to
• 33:55
  Speaker 1: prove in vain seemed very probable. She was at the
• 33:58
  Speaker 1: critical age when a woman begins to regret having remained
• 34:02
  Speaker 1: faithful to a husband she has never truly loved, and
• 34:05
  Speaker 1: when the purple sunset of her beauty still affords her
• 34:08
  Speaker 1: a final, urgent choice between motherliness and womanliness. The life,
• 34:14
  Speaker 1: whose questions seem to have been answered long before, becomes
• 34:18
  Speaker 1: a problem again, and for the last time, the magnetic
• 34:21
  Speaker 1: needle of the will wavers between the hope for an
• 34:24
  Speaker 1: intense love experience and ultimate resignation. The woman has a
• 34:29
  Speaker 1: dangerous decision to confront whether she will live her own
• 34:33
  Speaker 1: life or that of her children, whether she will be
• 34:36
  Speaker 1: a woman first or a mother first. The baron, who
• 34:40
  Speaker 1: was very perspicacious in these matters, thought that he discerned
• 34:43
  Speaker 1: in Edgar's mother this very vacillation between passion to live
• 34:47
  Speaker 1: her own life and readiness to sacrifice her desires. In conversation,
• 34:52
  Speaker 1: she always omitted to mention her husband. Evidently he satisfied
• 34:57
  Speaker 1: nothing but her bare external needs. No, not the snobbishness
• 35:01
  Speaker 1: that an aristocratic way of living had excited in her.
• 35:04
  Speaker 1: And as for her son, she knew precious little of
• 35:07
  Speaker 1: the child's soul. A shadow of boredom, wearing the veil
• 35:11
  Speaker 1: of melancholy in her dark eyes, lay over her life
• 35:15
  Speaker 1: and obscured her sensuousness. The baron resolved to act quickly,
• 35:20
  Speaker 1: yet at the same time to avoid any appearance of haste.
• 35:24
  Speaker 1: Like an angler who tempts the fish by dangling and
• 35:27
  Speaker 1: withdrawing the bait, he would effect a show of indifference
• 35:31
  Speaker 1: and let himself be courted. While he was the one
• 35:34
  Speaker 1: that was actually doing the courting. He would put on
• 35:37
  Speaker 1: an air of haughtiness and bring it to sharp relief
• 35:40
  Speaker 1: the difference in their social ranks. There was fascination in
• 35:43
  Speaker 1: the idea of getting possession of that lovely, voluptuous creature
• 35:48
  Speaker 1: simply by stressing his pride by mere externals, by the
• 35:52
  Speaker 1: use of a high sounding aristocratic name, and the adoption
• 35:55
  Speaker 1: of a cold, proud manner. The chase was already growing hot.
• 36:00
  Speaker 1: He had to be cautious and not show his excitement,
• 36:03
  Speaker 1: so he remained in his room the whole afternoon, filled
• 36:07
  Speaker 1: with the pleasant consciousness of being looked for and missed.
• 36:10
  Speaker 1: But his absence was felt not so much by the
• 36:13
  Speaker 1: woman upon whom the effect was intended, as by Edgar.
• 36:17
  Speaker 1: To the wretched child, it was simply torture. The whole
• 36:21
  Speaker 1: afternoon he felt absolutely impotent and lost. With the obstinate
• 36:26
  Speaker 1: faithfulness of a boy. He waited long, long hours for
• 36:30
  Speaker 1: his friend to have gone away and done anything by
• 36:33
  Speaker 1: himself would have seemed like a crime against their friendship,
• 36:36
  Speaker 1: and he loafed the time away in the hotel corridors,
• 36:39
  Speaker 1: his heart growing heavier and heavier as each moment passed.
• 36:44
  Speaker 1: After a while, his heated imagination began to dwell on
• 36:47
  Speaker 1: a possible accident or an insult he might unwittingly have
• 36:51
  Speaker 1: offered his friend. He was on the verge of tears
• 36:54
  Speaker 1: from impatience and anxiety, so that when the baron came
• 36:58
  Speaker 1: in to dinner in the evening, he received a brilliant greeting.
• 37:02
  Speaker 1: Edgar jumped up, and, without paying any attention to his
• 37:05
  Speaker 1: mother's cry of rebuke or the astonishment of the other diners,
• 37:09
  Speaker 1: rushed at the baron and threw his thin little arms
• 37:12
  Speaker 1: about him. Where have you been? Where have you been?
• 37:15
  Speaker 1: We've been looking for you everywhere. The mother's face reddened
• 37:20
  Speaker 1: at hearing herself included in the search. Swiss sage Edgar. ACIDTOI,
• 37:25
  Speaker 1: she said, rather severely. She always spoke French to him,
• 37:29
  Speaker 1: though it by no means came readily to her tongue,
• 37:32
  Speaker 1: and if any but the simplest things were to be said,
• 37:35
  Speaker 1: she invariably floundered. Edgar obeyed and went back to his seat,
• 37:39
  Speaker 1: but kept on questioning the Baron. Edgar. His mother interposed,
• 37:44
  Speaker 1: don't forget that the baron can do whatever he wants
• 37:47
  Speaker 1: to do. Perhaps our company bores him. Now she included herself,
• 37:52
  Speaker 1: and the baron noted with satisfaction that the rebuke directed
• 37:56
  Speaker 1: to the child was really an invitation for a compliment
• 37:59
  Speaker 1: to herself. The hunter in him awakened. He was intoxicated,
• 38:04
  Speaker 1: thoroughly excited at having so quickly come upon the right
• 38:07
  Speaker 1: tracks and seeing the game so close to the muzzle.
• 38:10
  Speaker 1: Of his gun, his eyes sparkled, his blood shot through
• 38:14
  Speaker 1: his veins. The words fairly bubbled from his lips, with
• 38:17
  Speaker 1: no conscious effort on his part. Like all men with
• 38:21
  Speaker 1: pronouncedly erotic temperaments, he did twice as well was twice
• 38:25
  Speaker 1: himself when he knew a woman liked him, as some
• 38:28
  Speaker 1: actors take fire when they feel that their auditors, the
• 38:32
  Speaker 1: breathing mass of humanity in front of them, are completely
• 38:35
  Speaker 1: under their spell. Naturally, an excellent raconteur with great skill
• 38:40
  Speaker 1: in graphic description, he now surpassed himself. Besides, he drank
• 38:44
  Speaker 1: several glasses of champagne ordered in honor of the new friendship.
• 38:49
  Speaker 1: He told of hunting big game in India, where he
• 38:52
  Speaker 1: had gone at the invitation of an English nobleman. The
• 38:55
  Speaker 1: theme was well chosen. The conversation had necessarily to be
• 38:59
  Speaker 1: about indifferent mans matters, but this subject, to the baron felt,
• 39:02
  Speaker 1: would excite the woman, as would anything exotic and unattainable
• 39:06
  Speaker 1: by her. The one, however, upon whom the greater charm
• 39:10
  Speaker 1: was exercised, was Edgar. His eyes glowed with enthusiasm. He
• 39:15
  Speaker 1: forgot to eat or drink, and stared at the story
• 39:18
  Speaker 1: teller as if to snatch the words from his lips
• 39:21
  Speaker 1: with his eyes. He had never expected actually to see
• 39:24
  Speaker 1: a man who, in his own person had experienced those
• 39:27
  Speaker 1: tremendous things which he read about in his books Tiger hunts,
• 39:32
  Speaker 1: brown men, Hindus, and the terrible juggernaut which crushed thousands
• 39:37
  Speaker 1: of men under its wheels. Until then he had thought
• 39:41
  Speaker 1: such men did not really exist, and believed in them
• 39:44
  Speaker 1: no more than in fairyland. A certain new and great
• 39:47
  Speaker 1: feeling expanded his chest. He could not remove his eyes
• 39:51
  Speaker 1: from his friend, and stared with bated breath at the
• 39:54
  Speaker 1: hands across the table that had actually killed a tiger.
• 39:59
  Speaker 1: Scarcely did he dared to ask a question, and when
• 40:02
  Speaker 1: he ventured to speak, it was with a feverish tremor
• 40:05
  Speaker 1: in his voice. His lively imagination drew the picture. For
• 40:09
  Speaker 1: each story. He saw his friend mounted high on an elephant,
• 40:13
  Speaker 1: caparisoned in purple, brown men to the right and to
• 40:16
  Speaker 1: the left, wearing rich turbans, And then suddenly the tiger
• 40:20
  Speaker 1: leaping out of the jungle with gnashing teeth and burying
• 40:24
  Speaker 1: its claws in the elephant's trunk. Now the baron was
• 40:27
  Speaker 1: telling about something even more interesting, How elephants were caught
• 40:31
  Speaker 1: by a trick. Old domesticated elephants were used to lure
• 40:36
  Speaker 1: the young, wild, high spirited ones into the enclosure. The
• 40:40
  Speaker 1: child's eyes flashed then, as though a knife came cutting
• 40:44
  Speaker 1: through the air, right down between him and the baron.
• 40:47
  Speaker 1: His mother said, glancing at the clock, nephir or lee.
• 40:52
  Speaker 1: Edgar turned white. To be sent to bed is dreadful
• 40:55
  Speaker 1: enough to grown children at any time. It is the
• 40:58
  Speaker 1: most patent humiliation an adult company, the proclamation that one
• 41:02
  Speaker 1: is still a child, the stigma of being small and
• 41:05
  Speaker 1: needing a child's sleep. But how much more dreadful at
• 41:09
  Speaker 1: so interesting a moment, when the chance of listening to
• 41:13
  Speaker 1: such wonderful things would be lost. Just this one story, mother,
• 41:18
  Speaker 1: Just this one story about the elephants. He was about
• 41:21
  Speaker 1: to plead, but bethought himself quickly of his new dignity.
• 41:25
  Speaker 1: He was a grown up person. One attempt was all
• 41:28
  Speaker 1: he ventured. But that night his mother was peculiarly strict. No,
• 41:33
  Speaker 1: it's late already, Just go up, Swiss, saga Edgar. I'll
• 41:37
  Speaker 1: tell you the story over again, exactly the way the
• 41:40
  Speaker 1: baron tells it to me. Edgar lingered a moment usually
• 41:45
  Speaker 1: his mother went upstairs with him, but he wasn't going
• 41:47
  Speaker 1: to beg her in front of his friend. His childish
• 41:50
  Speaker 1: pride made him want to give his pitiful withdrawals somewhat,
• 41:54
  Speaker 1: at least the appearance of being voluntary. Will you really everything,
• 41:59
  Speaker 1: all about the elephant and everything else? Yes, Edgar, everything
• 42:03
  Speaker 1: tonight still yes? Yes, But go on, go to bed now.
• 42:09
  Speaker 1: Edgar was amazed that he was able to shake hands
• 42:11
  Speaker 1: with the baron and his mother without blushing. The sobs
• 42:15
  Speaker 1: were already choking his throat. The baron ran his hand
• 42:19
  Speaker 1: good naturedly through his hair and pulled it down on
• 42:21
  Speaker 1: his forehead. That brought a forced smile to the boy's
• 42:25
  Speaker 1: tense features. But the next instant he had to hurry
• 42:28
  Speaker 1: to the door or they would see the great tears
• 42:30
  Speaker 1: well over his eyelids and trickle down his cheeks. End
• 42:36
  Speaker 1: of chapter four, Chapter five of The Burning Secret by
• 42:45
  Speaker 1: Stefan Schweig. This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 42:50
  Speaker 1: Chapter five The Elephants. Edgar's mother stayed at the table
• 42:55
  Speaker 1: with the baron a while longer, but the two no
• 42:58
  Speaker 1: longer spoke of elephants or hunting. An indefinable embarrassment instantly
• 43:03
  Speaker 1: sprang up between them, and a faint sultriness descended upon
• 43:07
  Speaker 1: their conversation. After a time, they went out into the
• 43:10
  Speaker 1: hall and seated themselves in a corner. The baron was
• 43:14
  Speaker 1: more brilliant than ever. The woman was a little heated
• 43:17
  Speaker 1: by her two glasses of champagne, so that the conversation
• 43:21
  Speaker 1: quickly took a dangerous turn. The baron was not what
• 43:24
  Speaker 1: is called exactly handsome. He was simply young, and had
• 43:28
  Speaker 1: a manly look in his dark brown, energetic, boyish face,
• 43:32
  Speaker 1: and he charmed her with his fresh, almost ill bred movements.
• 43:36
  Speaker 1: She liked looking at him at such close range, and
• 43:39
  Speaker 1: was no longer afraid to encounter his eyes. Gradually, there
• 43:44
  Speaker 1: crept into his language a boldness which vaguely disconcerted her.
• 43:48
  Speaker 1: It was like a gripping of her body, and then
• 43:50
  Speaker 1: a letting go, an intangible sort of desire, which sent
• 43:54
  Speaker 1: the blood rushing to her face. The next moment, however,
• 43:58
  Speaker 1: he would laugh again, an easy, unconstrained, boyish laugh, which
• 44:02
  Speaker 1: made his little manifestations of desire seem like joking. Sometimes
• 44:07
  Speaker 1: he said things she felt she ought to object to bluntly,
• 44:11
  Speaker 1: but she was a natural born coquette, and his trifling
• 44:14
  Speaker 1: audacities only provoked in her the taste for more. She
• 44:18
  Speaker 1: was carried away by his bold gaze, and at length
• 44:22
  Speaker 1: got so far as to try to imitate him, answering
• 44:24
  Speaker 1: his looks with little fluttering promises from her own eyes,
• 44:28
  Speaker 1: and giving herself up to him in words and gestures.
• 44:32
  Speaker 1: She permitted him to draw close to her, so that
• 44:35
  Speaker 1: every now and then she felt the warm graze of
• 44:38
  Speaker 1: his breath on her shoulders. Like all gamblers, the two
• 44:42
  Speaker 1: forgot the passage of time and became so absorbed that
• 44:45
  Speaker 1: they started in surprise. When the lights in the hall
• 44:48
  Speaker 1: were turned off at midnight. The woman jumped up in
• 44:51
  Speaker 1: response to the first impulse of alarm she had felt.
• 44:55
  Speaker 1: In the same moment, she realized to what audacious lengths
• 44:59
  Speaker 1: she had ventured. It was not the first time she
• 45:01
  Speaker 1: had played with fire, but now her instincts all aroused
• 45:06
  Speaker 1: told her the game had come perilously close to being
• 45:09
  Speaker 1: in earnest. She shuddered inwardly at discovering that she no
• 45:13
  Speaker 1: longer felt quite secure, that something in her was slipping
• 45:17
  Speaker 1: and gliding down into an abyss. Her head whirled with alarm.
• 45:21
  Speaker 1: With slight intoxication from the champagne, and with the ring
• 45:25
  Speaker 1: of the baron's ardent language in her ears, a dull
• 45:29
  Speaker 1: dread came over her. She had experienced the same sort
• 45:32
  Speaker 1: of dread several times before, in similar dangerous moments, but
• 45:37
  Speaker 1: it had never so overpowered her. This extreme dizziness was
• 45:41
  Speaker 1: something she had never before experienced. Good Night, she said, hastily,
• 45:47
  Speaker 1: see you in the morning. Again. She felt like running away,
• 45:51
  Speaker 1: not so much from him as from the danger of
• 45:53
  Speaker 1: the moment, and from an odd novel insecurity she felt
• 45:57
  Speaker 1: within herself. But the baron held her hand in a
• 46:01
  Speaker 1: tight but gentle grip and kissed it four or five times,
• 46:04
  Speaker 1: from the delicate tips of her fingers to her wrist.
• 46:08
  Speaker 1: A little shiver went through her at the graze of
• 46:10
  Speaker 1: his rough mustache on the back of her hand, and
• 46:13
  Speaker 1: her blood ran warm and mounted to her head. Her
• 46:17
  Speaker 1: cheeks glowed. There was a hammering at her temples. A wild,
• 46:21
  Speaker 1: unreasoning fear made her snatch her hand away. Don't go,
• 46:26
  Speaker 1: don't go, the baron pleaded in a whisper, but she
• 46:30
  Speaker 1: was already gone, the awkwardness of her haste revealing plainly
• 46:34
  Speaker 1: her fright and confusion. She was undergoing the excitement that
• 46:38
  Speaker 1: the baron wanted. She was all confused, one moment in
• 46:42
  Speaker 1: awful dread that the man behind might follow and put
• 46:45
  Speaker 1: his arms round her, and the next instant regretting that
• 46:49
  Speaker 1: he had not done so. In those few seconds, the
• 46:52
  Speaker 1: thing might have taken place that she had been dreaming
• 46:55
  Speaker 1: of for years, the great adventure She had always taken,
• 46:59
  Speaker 1: voluptuous delight in creeping up to the very edge of
• 47:02
  Speaker 1: an adventure and then jumping back at the last moment,
• 47:06
  Speaker 1: an adventure of the great and dangerous kind, not a
• 47:09
  Speaker 1: mere fleeting flirtation. But the baron was too proud to
• 47:12
  Speaker 1: push his advantage, now too assured of his victory to
• 47:16
  Speaker 1: take this woman Like a robber in a moment of
• 47:18
  Speaker 1: weakness and intoxication. A fair sportsman prefers his game to
• 47:23
  Speaker 1: show fight and to surrender. Quite consciously, the woman could
• 47:27
  Speaker 1: not escape him. The virus he knew was already seething
• 47:32
  Speaker 1: in her veins. She stopped on the landing above and
• 47:35
  Speaker 1: pressed her hand to her throbbing heart. She had to
• 47:39
  Speaker 1: rest awhile her nerves were snapping. She heaved a great sigh,
• 47:43
  Speaker 1: partly of relief at having escaped danger. Partly of regret.
• 47:48
  Speaker 1: Her emotions were mixed, and all she was vividly conscious
• 47:52
  Speaker 1: of was the whirl of her blood and a faint giddiness.
• 47:56
  Speaker 1: With half closed eyes, she groped her way like a
• 47:58
  Speaker 1: drunken woman to the door and breathed with relief when
• 48:02
  Speaker 1: she felt the cool door knob in her hand. At
• 48:05
  Speaker 1: last she was safe. She opened the door softly, and
• 48:09
  Speaker 1: the next second started back in fright. Something had moved
• 48:14
  Speaker 1: way back in the dark. In her excited state, this
• 48:17
  Speaker 1: was too much, and she was about to cry for
• 48:19
  Speaker 1: help when a very, very sleepy voice came from within, saying,
• 48:24
  Speaker 1: is that you mother? Goodness gracious, what are you doing here?
• 48:30
  Speaker 1: She rushed to the sofa where Edgar was lying curled up,
• 48:33
  Speaker 1: trying to keep himself wide awake. She thought the child
• 48:36
  Speaker 1: must be ill and needed attention. I waited for you
• 48:40
  Speaker 1: so long, and then I fell asleep. What were you
• 48:43
  Speaker 1: waiting for? You know? To hear about the elephants? Elephants?
• 48:50
  Speaker 1: As she asked the question, Edgar's mother remembered her promise.
• 48:54
  Speaker 1: She was to tell him all about the elephant hunts
• 48:57
  Speaker 1: and the baron's other adventures that very night, and so
• 49:00
  Speaker 1: the simple child had crept into her room and in
• 49:03
  Speaker 1: unquestioning faith, had waited for her until he had dropped asleep.
• 49:08
  Speaker 1: The absurdity of it enraged her, or rather, she was
• 49:11
  Speaker 1: angry with herself, and for that reason she wanted to outshriek,
• 49:15
  Speaker 1: the tiny whisper of her conscience, telling her she had
• 49:18
  Speaker 1: done a shameful wrong. Go to bed at once, you nuisance,
• 49:23
  Speaker 1: she cried. Edgar stared at her. Why was she so angry?
• 49:28
  Speaker 1: He hadn't done anything wrong, but his very amazement only
• 49:32
  Speaker 1: made her angrier. Go to bed at once, she shouted,
• 49:36
  Speaker 1: in a rage, because she felt how unjust she was
• 49:39
  Speaker 1: to the child. Edgar went without a word. He was
• 49:43
  Speaker 1: dreadfully sleepy and felt only in a blur that his
• 49:46
  Speaker 1: mother had not kept her promise, and that somehow or
• 49:49
  Speaker 1: other he was being treated meanly. Yet he did not rebel.
• 49:54
  Speaker 1: His susceptibilities were dulled by sleepiness. Besides, he was angry
• 49:59
  Speaker 1: with himself, having fallen asleep while waiting like a baby,
• 50:04
  Speaker 1: he said to himself in disgust, before dropping off to
• 50:07
  Speaker 1: sleep again. Since the day before, he hated himself for
• 50:11
  Speaker 1: being still a child. End of chapter five, Chapter six
• 50:23
  Speaker 1: of The Burning Secret by Stefan Schweig. This LibriVox recording
• 50:27
  Speaker 1: is in the public domain. Chapter six, Skirmishing. The baron
• 50:33
  Speaker 1: had passed a bad night. It is rather vain to
• 50:36
  Speaker 1: attempt to sleep after an adventure that has been abruptly
• 50:39
  Speaker 1: broken off. Tossing on his bed and starting up out
• 50:43
  Speaker 1: of oppressive dreams. The baron was soon regretting that he
• 50:47
  Speaker 1: had not seized the moment. The next morning, when he
• 50:50
  Speaker 1: came down, he was still sleepy and cross and in
• 50:53
  Speaker 1: no mood to take up with Edgar, who, at sight
• 50:56
  Speaker 1: of him, rushed out of a corner and threw his
• 50:58
  Speaker 1: arms about his waist and began to pester him with
• 51:01
  Speaker 1: a thousand questions. The boy was happy to have his
• 51:05
  Speaker 1: big friend to himself once more, without having to share
• 51:09
  Speaker 1: him with his mother. He implored him not to tell
• 51:12
  Speaker 1: his stories to her, but only to himself. In spite
• 51:15
  Speaker 1: of her promise, she had not recounted all those wonderful
• 51:18
  Speaker 1: things she had said she would. Edgar assailed the baron
• 51:22
  Speaker 1: with a hundred childish importunities and stormy demonstrations of love.
• 51:27
  Speaker 1: He was so happy at last to have found him
• 51:30
  Speaker 1: again and to be alone with him. He had been
• 51:33
  Speaker 1: waiting for him since early in the morning, the baron
• 51:36
  Speaker 1: gave the child rough answers that eternal lying in wait,
• 51:40
  Speaker 1: those silly questions. In short, the boy's unsolicited passion began
• 51:45
  Speaker 1: to annoy him. He was tired of going about all
• 51:48
  Speaker 1: day long with a puppy of twelve talking nonsense. All
• 51:52
  Speaker 1: he cared for now was to strike while the iron
• 51:55
  Speaker 1: was hot and get the mother by herself, the very
• 51:58
  Speaker 1: thing it was difficult to do with this child forever
• 52:01
  Speaker 1: inflicting his presence for the first time, the baron cursed
• 52:06
  Speaker 1: his incociousness in having inspired so much affection, for he
• 52:10
  Speaker 1: saw no chance on this occasion at least to rid
• 52:13
  Speaker 1: himself of his two too devoted friend. At any rate,
• 52:17
  Speaker 1: it was worth the trial. The baron waited until ten o'clock,
• 52:21
  Speaker 1: the time Edgar's mother had agreed to go out walking
• 52:24
  Speaker 1: with him. He sat beside the boy, paying no attention
• 52:28
  Speaker 1: to his chatter and even glancing through the paper, though
• 52:31
  Speaker 1: every now and then tossing the child a crumb of
• 52:34
  Speaker 1: talk so as not to insult him. When the hour
• 52:37
  Speaker 1: hand was at ten and the minute hand was just
• 52:40
  Speaker 1: reaching twelve, he asked Edgar, as though suddenly remembering something
• 52:44
  Speaker 1: to do him a favor and run across to the
• 52:47
  Speaker 1: next hotel and find out if his cousin, Count Rosseny
• 52:50
  Speaker 1: had arrived. Delighted at last to be of service to
• 52:54
  Speaker 1: his friend, the unsuspecting child ran off as fast as
• 52:58
  Speaker 1: his legs would carry him, careering down the road so
• 53:01
  Speaker 1: madly that people looked after him in wonder. Count Rossney,
• 53:06
  Speaker 1: the clerk told him, had not arrived, nor had he
• 53:09
  Speaker 1: even announced his coming. Edgar again made post haste back
• 53:13
  Speaker 1: to bring this information to his friend. But where was
• 53:16
  Speaker 1: his friend? Nowhere in the hall? Up in his room perhaps,
• 53:21
  Speaker 1: Edgar dashed up the stairs and knocked at his door.
• 53:24
  Speaker 1: No answer. He ran down again and searched in the
• 53:28
  Speaker 1: music room, the cafe, the verandahs, the smoking room. In vain.
• 53:33
  Speaker 1: He hurried to his mother's room to see if she
• 53:35
  Speaker 1: knew anything about the baron, but she was gone too.
• 53:39
  Speaker 1: When finally, in his despair, he applied to the porter,
• 53:42
  Speaker 1: he was told the two had gone out together a
• 53:45
  Speaker 1: few minutes before. Edgar waited for their return patiently. He
• 53:50
  Speaker 1: was altogether unsuspecting and felt quite sure that they would
• 53:53
  Speaker 1: come back soon, because the baron wanted to hear whether
• 53:56
  Speaker 1: or not his cousin had arrived. However, long stretches of
• 54:00
  Speaker 1: time went by, and gradually uneasiness crept upon him. Ever
• 54:05
  Speaker 1: since the moment when that strange, seductive man had entered
• 54:09
  Speaker 1: his little life, never as yet tinged by suspicion, the
• 54:13
  Speaker 1: child had spent his days in one continual state of
• 54:16
  Speaker 1: tension and tremulousness and confusion. Upon such delicate organisms as
• 54:21
  Speaker 1: those of children, every emotion impresses itself as upon soft
• 54:25
  Speaker 1: wax Edgar's eyelids began to twitch again, and he was
• 54:30
  Speaker 1: already a shade or two paler. He waited and waited
• 54:34
  Speaker 1: patiently at first, then in wild excitement, on the verge
• 54:37
  Speaker 1: of tears. Yet no suspicion crept into his child's soul.
• 54:42
  Speaker 1: So blindly trustful was he of his wonderful friend that
• 54:46
  Speaker 1: he fancied there must have been some misunderstanding, and he
• 54:49
  Speaker 1: tortured himself, fearing he had not executed his commission properly.
• 54:54
  Speaker 1: But when they came home at last, how odd that
• 54:57
  Speaker 1: they lingered at the threshold, talking gaily, without showing the
• 55:01
  Speaker 1: faintest surprise, and without apparently having missed him very much.
• 55:06
  Speaker 1: We went out expecting to meet you, Eddie, said the
• 55:09
  Speaker 1: Baron forgetting to ask if the count had arrived. When Edgar,
• 55:13
  Speaker 1: in consternation that they must have been looking for him
• 55:15
  Speaker 1: on the way between the two hotels, eagerly acerbated that
• 55:20
  Speaker 1: they had taken the straight road and questioned them about
• 55:23
  Speaker 1: the direction they had gone, His mother cut him off
• 55:25
  Speaker 1: short with all right, Edgar, all right, children must be
• 55:29
  Speaker 1: seen and not heard there. This was the second time,
• 55:34
  Speaker 1: Edgar thought, flushing with anger, that his mother had so
• 55:37
  Speaker 1: horridly tried to make him look small in front of
• 55:39
  Speaker 1: his friend. Why did she do it? Why did she
• 55:43
  Speaker 1: always want to set him down as a child when
• 55:46
  Speaker 1: he was convinced he was no longer a child. Evidently
• 55:50
  Speaker 1: she was jealous of his friend and was planning to
• 55:52
  Speaker 1: get him all to herself. Yes, that was it, and
• 55:56
  Speaker 1: it was she who had purposely led the baron the
• 55:58
  Speaker 1: wrong way. But he wouldn't let her treat him like
• 56:01
  Speaker 1: that again. He'd show her he was going to be spiteful.
• 56:05
  Speaker 1: He wasn't going to say a word to her at table,
• 56:08
  Speaker 1: and he would speak only to his friend. However, it
• 56:12
  Speaker 1: was not so easy to keep quiet as he thought
• 56:14
  Speaker 1: it would be. Things went in a most unanticipated way.
• 56:19
  Speaker 1: Neither his mother nor the baron noticed his attitude of spitefulness.
• 56:23
  Speaker 1: Why they did not even pay the slightest attention to him,
• 56:27
  Speaker 1: who the day before had been the medium of their
• 56:29
  Speaker 1: coming together. They talked over his head and laughed and
• 56:33
  Speaker 1: joked as though he had disappeared under the table. His
• 56:37
  Speaker 1: blood mounted to his head, and a lump came into
• 56:40
  Speaker 1: his throat. A horrid sense of his impotence overwhelmed him.
• 56:45
  Speaker 1: Was it his doom to sit there quietly and look
• 56:48
  Speaker 1: on while his mother stole away from him his friend,
• 56:51
  Speaker 1: the one man he loved? While he Edgar made no
• 56:54
  Speaker 1: movement in self defense and used no other weapon than silence,
• 56:59
  Speaker 1: he felt as though he must get up and pound
• 57:01
  Speaker 1: the table with his clenched fists just to make them
• 57:04
  Speaker 1: take notice of him. But he restrained himself and merely
• 57:08
  Speaker 1: put down his knife and fork and stopped eating. Even this,
• 57:12
  Speaker 1: it was a long time before they observed. It was
• 57:15
  Speaker 1: not until the last course that his mother became conscious
• 57:18
  Speaker 1: that he had not tasted his food and asked him
• 57:21
  Speaker 1: if he were not feeling well. Disgusting, he thought, that's
• 57:26
  Speaker 1: all she ever thinks of, whether I'm sick or not.
• 57:29
  Speaker 1: Nothing else about me seems to matter. To her. He
• 57:33
  Speaker 1: told her shortly that he wasn't hungry, which quite satisfied her. Nothing,
• 57:37
  Speaker 1: absolutely nothing forced them to pay attention to him. The
• 57:41
  Speaker 1: baron seemed to have forgotten him completely, at least he
• 57:45
  Speaker 1: never addressed a single remark to him. His eyeballs were
• 57:49
  Speaker 1: getting hot with suppressed tears, and finally he had to
• 57:52
  Speaker 1: resort to the childlike device of raising his napkin like
• 57:56
  Speaker 1: a screen to hide the traitorous drops that rolled down
• 57:59
  Speaker 1: his cheeks and salted his lips. When the meal finally
• 58:03
  Speaker 1: came to an end, he drew a sigh of relief.
• 58:06
  Speaker 1: During the meal, his mother had proposed a drive to
• 58:09
  Speaker 1: an interesting spot in the neighborhood, and Edgar had listened
• 58:13
  Speaker 1: with his lips between his teeth, so she was not
• 58:16
  Speaker 1: going to allow him a single moment alone with his
• 58:18
  Speaker 1: friend any more. But now as they got up from
• 58:22
  Speaker 1: table came something even worse, and Edgar's anger went over
• 58:26
  Speaker 1: into a fury of hate. Edgar said his mother, you'll
• 58:30
  Speaker 1: be forgetting everything you learned at school. You had better
• 58:33
  Speaker 1: stay here this afternoon while we're out driving, than do
• 58:36
  Speaker 1: a little studying. He clenched his small fists again. There
• 58:40
  Speaker 1: she was at it again, humiliating him in front of
• 58:43
  Speaker 1: his friend, publicly reminding him that he was still a
• 58:47
  Speaker 1: child who had to go to school and whose presence
• 58:50
  Speaker 1: was merely tolerated by his elders. This time, however, her
• 58:54
  Speaker 1: intentions were altogether too obvious, and Edgar was satisfied to
• 58:58
  Speaker 1: turn away without replying. Insulted again, she said, smiling, and
• 59:03
  Speaker 1: then to the baron, do you really think it so
• 59:06
  Speaker 1: bad for him to spend an hour studying once in
• 59:08
  Speaker 1: a while. To this, something in the child's heart congealed.
• 59:13
  Speaker 1: To this, the baron, who called himself his friend, and
• 59:16
  Speaker 1: who had made fun of him for being a bookworm,
• 59:19
  Speaker 1: made answer that an hour or two really couldn't do
• 59:21
  Speaker 1: any harm. Was there an agreement between the two? Had
• 59:25
  Speaker 1: they actually allied themselves against him? My father, said the boy,
• 59:30
  Speaker 1: his eyes flashing anger, forbade my studying here. He wants
• 59:35
  Speaker 1: me to get my health back here. Edgar hurled this
• 59:38
  Speaker 1: out with all his pride in his illness, clinging desperately
• 59:41
  Speaker 1: to his father's dictum and his father's authority. It came
• 59:45
  Speaker 1: out like a threat, and to his immense astonishment, it
• 59:49
  Speaker 1: took effect, seeming actually to have made both of them
• 59:52
  Speaker 1: uncomfortable his mother, especially for she turned her eyes aside
• 59:56
  Speaker 1: and began to drum on the table nervously with her fingers.
• 1:00:00
  Speaker 1: For a while, there was a painful silence, broken finally
• 1:00:04
  Speaker 1: by the baron, who said, with a forced laugh, it's
• 1:00:07
  Speaker 1: just as you say, Eddie, I myself don't have to
• 1:00:10
  Speaker 1: take examinations any more. I failed in all my examinations
• 1:00:14
  Speaker 1: long ago. Edgar gave no smile, but looked at the
• 1:00:18
  Speaker 1: baron with a yearning, searching gaze, as if to probe
• 1:00:22
  Speaker 1: to the innermost of his being. What was taking place
• 1:00:25
  Speaker 1: in the baron's soul. Something between him and Edgar had changed,
• 1:00:29
  Speaker 1: and the child knew not what or why. His eyes
• 1:00:33
  Speaker 1: wandered unsteadily in his heart went a little rapid hammer
• 1:00:38
  Speaker 1: his first suspicion. End of chapter six, chapter seven of
• 1:00:49
  Speaker 1: The Burning Secret by Stefan Schweig. This LibriVox recording is
• 1:00:54
  Speaker 1: in the public domain. Chapter seven, The Burning Secret? What
• 1:01:00
  Speaker 1: has made them so different? The child pondered, while sitting
• 1:01:03
  Speaker 1: opposite them in the carriage. Why don't they behave toward
• 1:01:07
  Speaker 1: me as they did at first? Why does Mama avoid
• 1:01:10
  Speaker 1: my eyes when I look at her? Why does he
• 1:01:13
  Speaker 1: always try to joke when I'm around and make a
• 1:01:15
  Speaker 1: silly of himself. They don't talk to me as they
• 1:01:18
  Speaker 1: did yesterday or the day before yesterday. Their faces even
• 1:01:23
  Speaker 1: seem different. Mamma's lips are so red. She must have
• 1:01:26
  Speaker 1: rouged them. I never saw her do that before. And
• 1:01:30
  Speaker 1: he keeps frowning as though he were offended. Could I
• 1:01:34
  Speaker 1: have said anything to annoy them? No, I haven't said
• 1:01:38
  Speaker 1: a word. It cannot be on my account that they're
• 1:01:41
  Speaker 1: so changed. Even their manner toward each other is not
• 1:01:44
  Speaker 1: the same as it was. They behave as though they
• 1:01:47
  Speaker 1: had been naughty and didn't dare confess. They don't chat
• 1:01:51
  Speaker 1: the way they did yesterday, nor laugh. They're embarrassed. They're
• 1:01:55
  Speaker 1: concealing something. They've got a secret between them that they
• 1:01:59
  Speaker 1: don't want to tell me. I'm going to find it out.
• 1:02:02
  Speaker 1: I must. I don't care what happens. I must. I
• 1:02:06
  Speaker 1: believe I know what it is. It must be the
• 1:02:09
  Speaker 1: same thing that grown up people always shut me out
• 1:02:12
  Speaker 1: from when they talk about it. It's what books speak of,
• 1:02:15
  Speaker 1: and it comes in operas when the men and women
• 1:02:18
  Speaker 1: on the stage stand singing, face to face with their
• 1:02:21
  Speaker 1: arms spread out and embrace and shove each other away.
• 1:02:25
  Speaker 1: It must have something to do with my French governess
• 1:02:28
  Speaker 1: who behaved so badly with Papa and was dismissed. All
• 1:02:33
  Speaker 1: these things are connected, I feel they are, but I
• 1:02:36
  Speaker 1: don't know how. Oh, to find it out at last,
• 1:02:40
  Speaker 1: to find it out, that secret, to possess the key
• 1:02:43
  Speaker 1: that opens all doors. Not to be a child any longer,
• 1:02:47
  Speaker 1: with everything kept hidden from one, and always being held
• 1:02:51
  Speaker 1: off and deceived. Now or never I will tear it
• 1:02:55
  Speaker 1: from them, that dreadful secret, A deep furrow cut itself
• 1:03:00
  Speaker 1: between the child's brows. He looked almost old as he
• 1:03:03
  Speaker 1: sat in the carriage, painfully cogitating this great mystery, and
• 1:03:08
  Speaker 1: never casting a single glance at the landscape, which was
• 1:03:11
  Speaker 1: shading into all the delicate colors of the spring, the
• 1:03:14
  Speaker 1: mountains in the fresh and green of their pines, the
• 1:03:17
  Speaker 1: valleys in the mistier greens of budding trees, shrubbery and
• 1:03:22
  Speaker 1: young grass. All he had eyes for were the man
• 1:03:25
  Speaker 1: and the woman on the seat opposite him, as though
• 1:03:28
  Speaker 1: with his hot gaze, as with an angling hook, he
• 1:03:31
  Speaker 1: could snatch the secret from the shimmering depths of their eyes.
• 1:03:36
  Speaker 1: Nothing gives so keen an edge to the intelligence as
• 1:03:39
  Speaker 1: a passionate, suspicion. All the possibilities of an immature mind
• 1:03:43
  Speaker 1: are developed by a trail leading into obscurity. Sometimes it
• 1:03:48
  Speaker 1: is only a single light door that keeps children out
• 1:03:51
  Speaker 1: of the world that we call the real world, and
• 1:03:54
  Speaker 1: a chance puff of wind may blow it open. Edgar
• 1:03:58
  Speaker 1: all at once fell himself tangibly closer, closer than ever before,
• 1:04:04
  Speaker 1: to the unknown, the great secret. It was right next
• 1:04:08
  Speaker 1: to him, still veiled and unriddled, but very near. It
• 1:04:12
  Speaker 1: excited him, and it was this that lent him his
• 1:04:15
  Speaker 1: sudden solemnity. Unconsciously, he sensed that he was approaching the
• 1:04:20
  Speaker 1: outer edges of childhood. The baron and Edgar's mother were
• 1:04:24
  Speaker 1: both sensible of a dumb opposition in front of them,
• 1:04:28
  Speaker 1: without realizing that it emanated from the child. The presence
• 1:04:32
  Speaker 1: of a third person in the carriage constrained them, and
• 1:04:35
  Speaker 1: those two dark glowing orbs opposite acted as a check.
• 1:04:40
  Speaker 1: They scarcely dared to speak or look up, and it
• 1:04:43
  Speaker 1: was impossible for them to drop back into the light,
• 1:04:46
  Speaker 1: easy conversational tone of the day before. So entangled were
• 1:04:50
  Speaker 1: they already in ardent confidences and words suggestive of secret caresses.
• 1:04:56
  Speaker 1: They would start a subject promptly come to a halt,
• 1:04:59
  Speaker 1: say a broken phrase or two, make another attempt, then
• 1:05:03
  Speaker 1: lapse again into complete silence. Everything they said seemed always
• 1:05:08
  Speaker 1: to stumble over the child's obstinate silence and fall flat.
• 1:05:13
  Speaker 1: The mother was especially oppressed by her son's sullen quiescence,
• 1:05:18
  Speaker 1: giving him a cautious glance out of the corner of
• 1:05:20
  Speaker 1: her eyes, she was startled to observe for the first
• 1:05:23
  Speaker 1: time in the manner Edgar compressed his lips a resemblance
• 1:05:28
  Speaker 1: to her husband when he was annoyed. At that particular moment,
• 1:05:32
  Speaker 1: when she was playing hide and seek with an adventure,
• 1:05:35
  Speaker 1: it was more than ordinarily discomfiting to be reminded of
• 1:05:39
  Speaker 1: her husband. The boy, only a foot or two away,
• 1:05:43
  Speaker 1: with his dark, restless eyes, and that suggestion behind his
• 1:05:47
  Speaker 1: pale forehead of lying in wait, seemed to her like
• 1:05:50
  Speaker 1: a ghost, a guardian of her conscience, doubly intolerable there
• 1:05:55
  Speaker 1: in the close quarters of the carriage. Suddenly, for one second,
• 1:06:00
  Speaker 1: Edgar looked up and met his mother's gaze. Instantly they
• 1:06:04
  Speaker 1: dropped their eyes in the consciousness that they were spying
• 1:06:07
  Speaker 1: on each other, till then each had had implicit faith
• 1:06:11
  Speaker 1: in the other. Now something had come between mother and
• 1:06:14
  Speaker 1: child and made a difference for the first time in
• 1:06:18
  Speaker 1: their lives. They set to observing each other, to separating
• 1:06:21
  Speaker 1: their destinies, with secret hate already mounting in their hearts,
• 1:06:26
  Speaker 1: though the feeling was too young for either to admit
• 1:06:28
  Speaker 1: it to himself. When the horses pulled up at the
• 1:06:32
  Speaker 1: hotel entrance, all three were relieved. The excursion had been
• 1:06:36
  Speaker 1: a failure, each of them felt, though they did not
• 1:06:39
  Speaker 1: say so. Edgar was the first to get out of
• 1:06:42
  Speaker 1: the carriage. His mother excused herself for going straight up
• 1:06:46
  Speaker 1: to her room, pleading a headache. She was tired and
• 1:06:50
  Speaker 1: wanted to be by herself. Edgar and the baron were
• 1:06:53
  Speaker 1: left alone together. The baron paid the coachman, looked at
• 1:06:57
  Speaker 1: his watch, and mounted the steps to the hall, paying
• 1:07:01
  Speaker 1: no attention to Edgar, and passed him with that easy
• 1:07:04
  Speaker 1: sway of his slim back, which had so enchanted the
• 1:07:07
  Speaker 1: child that he had immediately begun to imitate the baron's walk.
• 1:07:12
  Speaker 1: The baron brushed past him, right past him, evidently he
• 1:07:16
  Speaker 1: had forgotten him, and left him to stand there beside
• 1:07:19
  Speaker 1: the driver and the horses, as though he did not
• 1:07:22
  Speaker 1: belong to him. Something in Edgar broke into as the
• 1:07:26
  Speaker 1: man whom, in spite of everything, he still idolized, slighted
• 1:07:30
  Speaker 1: him like that. A bitter despair filled his heart. When
• 1:07:34
  Speaker 1: the baron left without so much as touching him with
• 1:07:37
  Speaker 1: his cloak or saying a single word. When he Edgar
• 1:07:41
  Speaker 1: was conscious of having done no wrong, his painfully enforced
• 1:07:45
  Speaker 1: self restraint gave way. The too heavy burden of dignity
• 1:07:49
  Speaker 1: that he had imposed upon himself dropped from his narrow
• 1:07:52
  Speaker 1: little shoulders, and he became the child again, small and
• 1:07:56
  Speaker 1: humble as he had been the day before. The top
• 1:08:00
  Speaker 1: of the steps, he confronted the baron and said, in
• 1:08:03
  Speaker 1: a strained voice thick with suppressed tears, what have I
• 1:08:08
  Speaker 1: done to you that you don't notice me any more?
• 1:08:11
  Speaker 1: Why are you always like this with me? Now? And
• 1:08:14
  Speaker 1: Mamma too? Why are you always sending me off? Am
• 1:08:18
  Speaker 1: I a nuisance to you? Or have I done anything
• 1:08:21
  Speaker 1: to offend you? The baron was startled. There was something
• 1:08:25
  Speaker 1: in the child's voice that upset him at first, then
• 1:08:28
  Speaker 1: stirred him to tenderness and sympathy for the unsuspecting boy.
• 1:08:33
  Speaker 1: You're a goo, said he. I'm merely out of sorts
• 1:08:36
  Speaker 1: to day. You're a dear boy, and I really love you.
• 1:08:40
  Speaker 1: He tozzled Edgar's hair, yet with averted face so as
• 1:08:44
  Speaker 1: not to be obliged to see those great moist beseeching
• 1:08:47
  Speaker 1: child's eyes. The comedy he was playing was becoming painful.
• 1:08:52
  Speaker 1: He was beginning to be ashamed of having trifled so
• 1:08:55
  Speaker 1: insolently with the child's love. That small voice, quiver with
• 1:09:00
  Speaker 1: suppressed sobs, cut him to the quick. Go upstairs, now, Eddie,
• 1:09:05
  Speaker 1: we'll get along together this evening just as nicely as ever.
• 1:09:08
  Speaker 1: You'll see. You won't let mamma send me right off
• 1:09:12
  Speaker 1: to bed, will you? No? No, I won't, Eddie. The
• 1:09:16
  Speaker 1: baron smiled. Just go on up, I must dress for dinner.
• 1:09:21
  Speaker 1: Edgar went, made happy for the moment. Soon, however, the
• 1:09:25
  Speaker 1: hammer began to knock at his heart again. He was
• 1:09:28
  Speaker 1: years older, since the day before, a strange guest distrust
• 1:09:33
  Speaker 1: had lodged itself in his child's breast. He waited for
• 1:09:37
  Speaker 1: the decisive test at table. Nine o'clock came and his
• 1:09:42
  Speaker 1: mother had not yet said a word about his going
• 1:09:44
  Speaker 1: to bed. Why did she let him stay on just
• 1:09:47
  Speaker 1: that day of all days? She who was usually so
• 1:09:50
  Speaker 1: exact it bothered him. Had the baron told her what
• 1:09:54
  Speaker 1: he had said. He was consumed with regret suddenly that
• 1:09:59
  Speaker 1: he had run after to the baron so trustingly. At
• 1:10:02
  Speaker 1: ten o'clock, his mother rose and took leave of the baron,
• 1:10:06
  Speaker 1: who oddly showed no surprise at her early departure and
• 1:10:10
  Speaker 1: made no attempt to detain her as he usually did.
• 1:10:14
  Speaker 1: The hammer beat harder and harder at Edgar's breast. Now
• 1:10:18
  Speaker 1: he must apply the test with exceeding care. He too,
• 1:10:22
  Speaker 1: behaved as though he suspected nothing, and followed his mother
• 1:10:25
  Speaker 1: to the door. Actually, in that second he caught a
• 1:10:29
  Speaker 1: smiling glance that traveled over his head straight to the baron,
• 1:10:33
  Speaker 1: and seemed to indicate a mutual understanding, a secret held
• 1:10:37
  Speaker 1: in common. So the baron had betrayed him. That was
• 1:10:41
  Speaker 1: why his mother had left so early. He Edgar was
• 1:10:45
  Speaker 1: to be lulled with a sense of security, so that
• 1:10:48
  Speaker 1: he would not get in their way. The next day, mean,
• 1:10:51
  Speaker 1: he murmured, what's that? His mother asked nothing. He muttered
• 1:10:57
  Speaker 1: between clenched teeth. He two had his secret. His secret
• 1:11:02
  Speaker 1: was hate, a great hate for the two of them.
• 1:11:07
  Speaker 1: End of Chapter seven, Chapter eight of the Burning Secret
• 1:11:16
  Speaker 1: by Steffan Schweig. This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 1:11:22
  Speaker 1: Chapter eight Silent Hostility. The tumult of Edgar's conflicting emotions
• 1:11:29
  Speaker 1: subsided into one smooth, clear feeling of hate and open hostility,
• 1:11:34
  Speaker 1: concentrated and unadulterated. Now that he was certain of being
• 1:11:39
  Speaker 1: in their way, the imposition of his presence upon them
• 1:11:42
  Speaker 1: gave him a voluptuous satisfaction, always accompanying them with the
• 1:11:47
  Speaker 1: compressed strength of his enmity. He would go them into madness.
• 1:11:51
  Speaker 1: He gloated over the thought. The first to whom he
• 1:11:55
  Speaker 1: showed his teeth was the baron. When he came downstairs
• 1:11:58
  Speaker 1: in the morning and said Hello, Edgar, with genuine heartiness
• 1:12:02
  Speaker 1: in his voice. Edgar remained sitting in the easy chair
• 1:12:06
  Speaker 1: and answered curtly with a hard good morning your mother
• 1:12:11
  Speaker 1: down Yet Edgar kept his eyes glued to his newspaper.
• 1:12:16
  Speaker 1: I don't know. The baron was puzzled, slept badly, Eddie.
• 1:12:21
  Speaker 1: The baron was counting on a joke to help him
• 1:12:24
  Speaker 1: over the situation again, but Edgar merely tossed out a
• 1:12:27
  Speaker 1: contemptuous note and continued to study the paper. Stupid The
• 1:12:33
  Speaker 1: baron murmured, shrugging his shoulders, and walked away. Hostilities had
• 1:12:38
  Speaker 1: been declared toward his mother. Edgar's manner was cool and polite.
• 1:12:44
  Speaker 1: When she made an awkward attempt to send him off
• 1:12:46
  Speaker 1: to the tennis court, he gave her a quiet rebuff,
• 1:12:50
  Speaker 1: and his smile and the bitter curl at the corners
• 1:12:52
  Speaker 1: of his mouth showed that he was no longer to
• 1:12:55
  Speaker 1: be fooled. I'd rather go walking with you, mamma, he said,
• 1:12:59
  Speaker 1: with the assumed friendliness, looking her straight in the eyes.
• 1:13:03
  Speaker 1: His answer was obviously not to her taste. She hesitated
• 1:13:07
  Speaker 1: and seemed to be looking for something. Wait for me here,
• 1:13:11
  Speaker 1: she decided at length, and went into the dining room
• 1:13:14
  Speaker 1: for breakfast. Edgar waited, but his distrust was lively, and
• 1:13:19
  Speaker 1: his instincts all Astir extracted a secret hostile intent from
• 1:13:24
  Speaker 1: everything the baron and his mother now said. Suspicion was
• 1:13:28
  Speaker 1: beginning to give him remarkable prespicacity sometimes. Instead. Therefore, of
• 1:13:33
  Speaker 1: waiting in the hall, as he had been bidden, he
• 1:13:36
  Speaker 1: went outside to a spot from which he commanded a
• 1:13:39
  Speaker 1: view not only of the main entrance, but of all
• 1:13:42
  Speaker 1: the exits from the hotel. Something in him scented deception,
• 1:13:47
  Speaker 1: He hid himself behind a pile of wood, as the
• 1:13:50
  Speaker 1: Indians do in the books, and when about half an
• 1:13:53
  Speaker 1: hour later he saw his mother actually coming out of
• 1:13:56
  Speaker 1: a side door, carrying a bunch of exquisite roses, and
• 1:14:00
  Speaker 1: followed by the baron the traitor, he laughed in glee.
• 1:14:04
  Speaker 1: They seemed to be gay and full of spirits. Were
• 1:14:08
  Speaker 1: they feeling relieved at having escaped him to be alone
• 1:14:11
  Speaker 1: with their secret? They laughed as they talked and turned
• 1:14:15
  Speaker 1: into the road leading to the woods. The moment had come. Edgar,
• 1:14:20
  Speaker 1: as though mere chance had brought him that way, strolled
• 1:14:23
  Speaker 1: out from behind the wood pile and walked to meet
• 1:14:26
  Speaker 1: them with the utmost composure, allowing himself ample time to
• 1:14:30
  Speaker 1: feast upon their surprise. When they caught sight of him,
• 1:14:34
  Speaker 1: they were quite taken aback he saw, and exchanged a
• 1:14:38
  Speaker 1: glance of astonishment. The child advanced slowly with an assumed
• 1:14:42
  Speaker 1: nonchalant air, never removing his mocking gaze from their faces.
• 1:14:47
  Speaker 1: Oh there you are, Eddie, we were looking for you inside,
• 1:14:51
  Speaker 1: his mother said Finally, the shameless liar, the child thought,
• 1:14:56
  Speaker 1: but held his lips set hard, keeping back the secret
• 1:14:59
  Speaker 1: of his hate. The three stood there irresolutely, one watchful
• 1:15:04
  Speaker 1: of the others. Well, let's go on, said the woman,
• 1:15:09
  Speaker 1: annoyed but resigned, and plucked one of the lovely roses
• 1:15:12
  Speaker 1: to bite. Her nostrils were quivering, a sign in her
• 1:15:16
  Speaker 1: of extreme anger. Edgar stood still, as though it were
• 1:15:20
  Speaker 1: a matter of indifference to him whether they walked on
• 1:15:23
  Speaker 1: or not, looked up at the sky, waited for them
• 1:15:26
  Speaker 1: to start, then followed leisurely. The baron made one more attempt.
• 1:15:32
  Speaker 1: There's a tennis tournament to day, have you ever seen one?
• 1:15:36
  Speaker 1: The baron was not worth an answer any more. Edgar
• 1:15:39
  Speaker 1: merely gave him a scornful look and pursed his lips
• 1:15:42
  Speaker 1: for whistling. That was his full reply. His hate showed
• 1:15:47
  Speaker 1: its bared teeth. Edgar's unwished for presence weighed upon the
• 1:15:52
  Speaker 1: two like a nightmare. They felt very like convicts who
• 1:15:56
  Speaker 1: follow their keeper, gritting their teeth and clenching their fists
• 1:15:59
  Speaker 1: and secret. Edgar neither did nor said anything out of
• 1:16:03
  Speaker 1: the way, yet he became every moment more unbearable to them,
• 1:16:08
  Speaker 1: with his watchful glances out of great moist eyes and
• 1:16:11
  Speaker 1: his dogged sullenness, which was like a prolonged growl at
• 1:16:15
  Speaker 1: any attempt they made at an advance go on ahead
• 1:16:19
  Speaker 1: of us. His mother suddenly snapped, made altogether ill at
• 1:16:23
  Speaker 1: ease by his intent, listening to everything she and the
• 1:16:26
  Speaker 1: baron were saying, don't be hopping right at my toes,
• 1:16:30
  Speaker 1: it makes me fidgety. Edgar obeyed, but at every few
• 1:16:34
  Speaker 1: steps he would face about and stand still, waiting for
• 1:16:38
  Speaker 1: them to catch up, as if they had lingered behind,
• 1:16:41
  Speaker 1: letting his gaze travel over them diabolically and enmeshing them
• 1:16:45
  Speaker 1: in a fiery net of hate in which they felt
• 1:16:48
  Speaker 1: they were being inextricably entangled. His malevolent silence corroded their
• 1:16:53
  Speaker 1: good spirits like an acid, his gaze dashed, extinguishing gall
• 1:16:57
  Speaker 1: on their conversation. The baron made no other attempts to
• 1:17:02
  Speaker 1: court the woman beside him, feeling infuriatedly that she was
• 1:17:06
  Speaker 1: slipping away from him because her fear of that annoying,
• 1:17:09
  Speaker 1: obnoxious child was cooling the passion he had fanned into
• 1:17:13
  Speaker 1: a flame with so much difficulty. After repeated unsuccessful attempts
• 1:17:18
  Speaker 1: at a conversation, they jogged along the path in complete silence,
• 1:17:23
  Speaker 1: hearing nothing but the rustling of the leaves and their
• 1:17:26
  Speaker 1: own dejected footsteps. There was active hostility now in each
• 1:17:31
  Speaker 1: of the three. The betrayed child perceived with satisfaction how
• 1:17:36
  Speaker 1: their anger gathered helplessly against his own little despised person.
• 1:17:41
  Speaker 1: Every now and then he cast a shrewd, ironic look
• 1:17:44
  Speaker 1: at the baron's sullen face, and saw how he was
• 1:17:47
  Speaker 1: muttering curses between gritted teeth, and had to restrain himself
• 1:17:52
  Speaker 1: from hurling them out at him. He also observed with
• 1:17:56
  Speaker 1: sarcastic glee how his mother's fury was mounting and their
• 1:18:00
  Speaker 1: Both of them were longing for an opportunity to attack
• 1:18:03
  Speaker 1: him and send him away, or render him innocuous. But
• 1:18:07
  Speaker 1: he gave them no opening. The tactics of his hate
• 1:18:10
  Speaker 1: had been prepared too well in advance and left no
• 1:18:12
  Speaker 1: spots exposed. Let us go back. His mother burst out,
• 1:18:17
  Speaker 1: feeling she could no longer control herself, and that she
• 1:18:20
  Speaker 1: must do something, if only cry out under the imposition
• 1:18:24
  Speaker 1: of this torture a pity, said Edgar quietly. It's so lovely.
• 1:18:30
  Speaker 1: The other two realized the child was making fun of them,
• 1:18:34
  Speaker 1: but they dared not retort their tyrant, Having learned marvelously
• 1:18:38
  Speaker 1: in two days the supreme art of self control, not
• 1:18:42
  Speaker 1: a quiver in his face betrayed his mordant irony. Without
• 1:18:46
  Speaker 1: another word being spoken, they retraced the long way back
• 1:18:50
  Speaker 1: to the hotel. When Edgar and his mother were alone
• 1:18:53
  Speaker 1: together in her room, her excitement was still seething. She
• 1:18:57
  Speaker 1: tossed her gloves and parasol down angrily. Edgar did not
• 1:19:01
  Speaker 1: fail to note these signs, and was aware that her
• 1:19:04
  Speaker 1: electrified nerves would seek to discharge themselves, but he courted
• 1:19:08
  Speaker 1: an outburst and remained in her room on purpose. She
• 1:19:13
  Speaker 1: paced up and down, seated herself, drummed on the table
• 1:19:16
  Speaker 1: with her fingers, and jumped up again. How untidy you look?
• 1:19:21
  Speaker 1: You go around filthy? It's a disgrace. Aren't you ashamed
• 1:19:25
  Speaker 1: of yourself? A boy of your age? Without a word
• 1:19:28
  Speaker 1: of opposition, Edgar went to his mother's toilet table and
• 1:19:32
  Speaker 1: washed and calmed himself. His cold, obdurate silence and the
• 1:19:36
  Speaker 1: ironic quiver of his lips drove her to a frenzy.
• 1:19:40
  Speaker 1: Nothing would have satisfied her so much as to give
• 1:19:43
  Speaker 1: him a sound beating. Go to your room, she screamed,
• 1:19:48
  Speaker 1: unable to endure his presence a second longer. Edgar smiled
• 1:19:52
  Speaker 1: and left the room. How the two trembled before him,
• 1:19:56
  Speaker 1: how they dreaded every moment in his presence, the merciless
• 1:20:00
  Speaker 1: grip of his eyes. The worse they felt, the more
• 1:20:04
  Speaker 1: he gloated, and the more challenging became his satisfaction. Edgar
• 1:20:08
  Speaker 1: tortured the two defenseless creatures with the almost animal cruelty
• 1:20:12
  Speaker 1: of children. The baron, because he had not given up
• 1:20:16
  Speaker 1: hope of playing a trick on the lad and was
• 1:20:18
  Speaker 1: thinking of nothing but the goal of his desires, could
• 1:20:22
  Speaker 1: still contain his anger. But Edgar's mother was losing her
• 1:20:25
  Speaker 1: hold upon herself and kept constantly slipping. It was a
• 1:20:29
  Speaker 1: relief to her to be able to shriek at him.
• 1:20:33
  Speaker 1: Don't play with your fork, she cried at table. You're
• 1:20:36
  Speaker 1: an ill bred monkey. You don't deserve to be in
• 1:20:39
  Speaker 1: the company of grown up people. Edgar smiled, with his
• 1:20:43
  Speaker 1: head tipped a trifle to one side. He knew his
• 1:20:46
  Speaker 1: mother's outburst was a sign of desperation, and took pride
• 1:20:50
  Speaker 1: in having made her betray herself. His manner and glance
• 1:20:53
  Speaker 1: were now as composed as a physician's in previous days.
• 1:20:57
  Speaker 1: He might have answered back rudely, so as to annoy her,
• 1:21:01
  Speaker 1: But hate teaches many things and quickly how he kept quiet,
• 1:21:06
  Speaker 1: and still kept quiet, and still kept quiet, until his mother,
• 1:21:10
  Speaker 1: under the pressure of his silence, began to scream. She
• 1:21:14
  Speaker 1: could stand it no longer. When they rose from table,
• 1:21:18
  Speaker 1: and Edgar, with his matter of coarse air of attachment,
• 1:21:21
  Speaker 1: proceeded to follow her and the baron, her pent up
• 1:21:24
  Speaker 1: anger suddenly burst out. She cast prudence to the winds
• 1:21:28
  Speaker 1: and led out the truth. Tortured by his crawling presence,
• 1:21:32
  Speaker 1: she reared like a horse pestered by crawling flies. Why
• 1:21:36
  Speaker 1: do you keep tagging after me like a child of three?
• 1:21:40
  Speaker 1: I don't want you around us all the time. Children
• 1:21:43
  Speaker 1: should not always be with their elders. Please remember that,
• 1:21:46
  Speaker 1: spend an hour or two by yourself for once, read something,
• 1:21:50
  Speaker 1: or do whatever you want. Leave me alone. You make
• 1:21:54
  Speaker 1: me nervous with your creepy ways. In that disgusting hang
• 1:21:57
  Speaker 1: dog air of yours, he had wrestled it from her.
• 1:22:01
  Speaker 1: At last the confession, He smiled, while the baron and
• 1:22:05
  Speaker 1: his mother seemed embarrassed. She swung about, turning her back
• 1:22:09
  Speaker 1: and was about to leave in a fury with herself
• 1:22:12
  Speaker 1: for having admitted so much to her little son. When
• 1:22:15
  Speaker 1: Edgar's voice came, saying coolly, Papa does not want me
• 1:22:20
  Speaker 1: to be by myself here. He made me promise not
• 1:22:23
  Speaker 1: to be wild and to stay with you. Edgar emphasized
• 1:22:27
  Speaker 1: Papa having noticed on the previous occasion when he used
• 1:22:31
  Speaker 1: the word that it had had a paralyzing effect upon
• 1:22:34
  Speaker 1: both of them in some way or other. Therefore, he
• 1:22:38
  Speaker 1: inferred his father must be implicated in this great mystery
• 1:22:42
  Speaker 1: and must have a secret power over them, because the
• 1:22:45
  Speaker 1: very mention of him seemed to frighten and distress them.
• 1:22:49
  Speaker 1: They said nothing this time either. They laid down their arms.
• 1:22:54
  Speaker 1: The mother left the room with the baron, and Edgar
• 1:22:57
  Speaker 1: followed behind, not humbly like a servitor, but hard, strict, inexorable,
• 1:23:02
  Speaker 1: like a guard over prisoners, rattling the chains against which
• 1:23:06
  Speaker 1: they strained in vain. Hate had steeled his child's strength. He,
• 1:23:11
  Speaker 1: the ignorant one, was stronger than the two older people,
• 1:23:14
  Speaker 1: whose hands were held fast by the Great Secret. End
• 1:23:19
  Speaker 1: of chapter eight, Chapter nine of The Burning Secret by
• 1:23:28
  Speaker 1: Steffan Schwig. This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 1:23:33
  Speaker 1: Chapter nine the lyars time was pressing. The Baron's holiday
• 1:23:39
  Speaker 1: would soon come to an end. And the few days
• 1:23:41
  Speaker 1: that remained must be exploited to the full. There was
• 1:23:45
  Speaker 1: no use. Both he and Edgar's mother felt trying to
• 1:23:48
  Speaker 1: break down the excited child's pertinacity, so they resorted to
• 1:23:52
  Speaker 1: the extreme measure of disgraceful evasion and flight, merely to
• 1:23:56
  Speaker 1: escape for an hour or two from under his yoke.
• 1:24:00
  Speaker 1: Please take these letters and have them registered at the
• 1:24:02
  Speaker 1: post office, his mother said to Edgar in the hall,
• 1:24:05
  Speaker 1: while the baron was outside ordering a cab. Edgar, remembering
• 1:24:10
  Speaker 1: that until then his mother had sent the hotel boys
• 1:24:13
  Speaker 1: on her errands, was suspicious. Were they hatching something against him?
• 1:24:18
  Speaker 1: He hesitated, where will you wait for me? Here? For sure? Yes? Now,
• 1:24:25
  Speaker 1: be sure to don't leave before I come back. You'll
• 1:24:28
  Speaker 1: wait right here in the hall, won't you. In the
• 1:24:31
  Speaker 1: consciousness of his superiority, he had adopted a commanding tone
• 1:24:35
  Speaker 1: with his mother. Many things had changed since the day
• 1:24:39
  Speaker 1: before yesterday. At the door, he encountered the baron, to
• 1:24:43
  Speaker 1: whom he spoke for the first time in two days.
• 1:24:46
  Speaker 1: I am going to the post office to register these letters.
• 1:24:49
  Speaker 1: My mother is waiting for me. Please do not go
• 1:24:52
  Speaker 1: until I come back. The baron hastened past him, all right,
• 1:24:57
  Speaker 1: we'll wait Edgar ran at top speed to the post office,
• 1:25:02
  Speaker 1: where he had to wait while a man ahead of
• 1:25:04
  Speaker 1: him asked a dozen silly questions. Finally his turn came,
• 1:25:08
  Speaker 1: and at last he was free to run back to
• 1:25:10
  Speaker 1: the hotel, which he reached just in time to see
• 1:25:14
  Speaker 1: the couple driving off. He turned rigid with anger and
• 1:25:18
  Speaker 1: had the impulse to pick up a stone and throw
• 1:25:20
  Speaker 1: it at them. So they had escaped him after all,
• 1:25:24
  Speaker 1: But by what a mean, contemptible lie? He had discovered
• 1:25:28
  Speaker 1: the day before that his mother lied, But that she
• 1:25:31
  Speaker 1: could so wantonly disregard a definite, expressed promise shattered his
• 1:25:36
  Speaker 1: last remnant of confidence. He could not understand life at
• 1:25:40
  Speaker 1: all any more, now that he realized that the words
• 1:25:43
  Speaker 1: which he had thought clothed a reality were nothing more
• 1:25:46
  Speaker 1: than bursting bubbles. But what a dreadful secret it must
• 1:25:50
  Speaker 1: be the drove grown people to such lengths to lie
• 1:25:53
  Speaker 1: to him a child, and to steal away like criminals
• 1:25:58
  Speaker 1: in the books he had read, men decay and murdered
• 1:26:00
  Speaker 1: one another for money, power, empire. But what was the
• 1:26:04
  Speaker 1: motive here? What were his mother and the baron after?
• 1:26:08
  Speaker 1: Why did they hide from him? What were they with
• 1:26:11
  Speaker 1: their lies trying to conceal. He racked his brain for
• 1:26:15
  Speaker 1: an answer to the riddle. Vaguely, he divined that the
• 1:26:18
  Speaker 1: secret was the bolt, which, when unlocked, opened the door
• 1:26:21
  Speaker 1: to let out childhood and to master it meant to
• 1:26:25
  Speaker 1: be grown up, to be a man at last, Oh,
• 1:26:28
  Speaker 1: to know what it was. But he could no longer
• 1:26:31
  Speaker 1: think clearly. His rage at their having escaped him was
• 1:26:35
  Speaker 1: like a fire that sent scorching smoke into his eyes
• 1:26:38
  Speaker 1: and kept him from seeing. He ran to the woods, and,
• 1:26:42
  Speaker 1: in the nick of time, reached a quiet, dark spot
• 1:26:45
  Speaker 1: where no one could see him, and burst into tears. Liars, dogs, mean, mean, mean.
• 1:26:53
  Speaker 1: He felt he must scream the words out to relieve
• 1:26:55
  Speaker 1: himself of his frenzy. All the pent up rage, impatience, annoyance, curiosity, impudence,
• 1:27:03
  Speaker 1: and the sense of betrayal of the last few days,
• 1:27:06
  Speaker 1: which he had suppressed in the fond belief that he
• 1:27:08
  Speaker 1: was an adult and must behave like an adult, now
• 1:27:11
  Speaker 1: gushed from him in a fit of weeping and sobbing.
• 1:27:15
  Speaker 1: It was the final crying spell of his childhood. For
• 1:27:18
  Speaker 1: the last time, he was giving in to the bliss
• 1:27:21
  Speaker 1: of weeping like a woman. In that moment, of uncontrolled fury.
• 1:27:25
  Speaker 1: His tears washed away his whole childhood, trust, love, credulity, respect.
• 1:27:32
  Speaker 1: The lad who returned to the hotel was different from
• 1:27:35
  Speaker 1: the child that had left it. He was cool and
• 1:27:38
  Speaker 1: level headed. He went first to his room and washed
• 1:27:41
  Speaker 1: his face carefully, so that the two should not enjoy
• 1:27:44
  Speaker 1: the triumph of seeing the traces of his tears. Then
• 1:27:48
  Speaker 1: he planned his strategy and waited patiently, without the least agitation.
• 1:27:53
  Speaker 1: There happened to be a good many guests in the
• 1:27:56
  Speaker 1: hotel when the carriage pulled up. At the door. Two
• 1:27:59
  Speaker 1: gentlemen were playing chess, a few others were reading their papers,
• 1:28:03
  Speaker 1: and a group of ladies sat talking. Edgar sat among them, quietly,
• 1:28:07
  Speaker 1: a trifle pale, with wavering glances. When his mother and
• 1:28:12
  Speaker 1: the baron appeared in the doorway, rather embarrassed at encountering
• 1:28:15
  Speaker 1: him so soon, and began to stammer out their excuses
• 1:28:19
  Speaker 1: prepared in advance, he confronted them calmly and said to
• 1:28:23
  Speaker 1: the baron, in a tone of challenge, I have something
• 1:28:26
  Speaker 1: to say to you, sir, very well. Later a little later, Edgar,
• 1:28:32
  Speaker 1: pitching his voice louder and enunciating every word clearly, and
• 1:28:36
  Speaker 1: distinctly said, so that everyone in the hall could hear. No.
• 1:28:41
  Speaker 1: Now you behaved like a villain. You knew my mother
• 1:28:44
  Speaker 1: was waiting for me and you Edgar cried, his mother,
• 1:28:49
  Speaker 1: feeling all glances upon her, and swooped down on him.
• 1:28:53
  Speaker 1: But Edgar, realizing that she wanted to shout him down,
• 1:28:56
  Speaker 1: screamed at the top of his voice, I say again,
• 1:28:59
  Speaker 1: in front of everybody. You lied. You lied disgracefully. It
• 1:29:03
  Speaker 1: was a dirty trick. The baron went white. The people stared,
• 1:29:09
  Speaker 1: some laughed. The mother clutched the boy, who was quivering
• 1:29:12
  Speaker 1: with excitement, and stammered out hoarsely, go right up to
• 1:29:16
  Speaker 1: your room, or I'll give you a beating right here,
• 1:29:19
  Speaker 1: in front of everybody. But Edgar had already calmed down.
• 1:29:24
  Speaker 1: He regretted he had been so violent, and was discontented
• 1:29:27
  Speaker 1: with himself that he had not coolly challenged the baron
• 1:29:30
  Speaker 1: as he had intended to. But his anger had been
• 1:29:33
  Speaker 1: stronger than his will. He turned and walked to the
• 1:29:36
  Speaker 1: staircase leisurely, with an air of perfect composure. You must
• 1:29:41
  Speaker 1: excuse him. The mother still went on stammering, confused by
• 1:29:45
  Speaker 1: the rather wicked glances fixed upon her, he's a nervous child,
• 1:29:49
  Speaker 1: you know. She was afraid of nothing so much as
• 1:29:53
  Speaker 1: a scandal, and she knew she must assume innocence instead. Therefore,
• 1:29:58
  Speaker 1: of taking to instant flight, she went up to the
• 1:30:01
  Speaker 1: desk and asked for her mail, and made several other
• 1:30:04
  Speaker 1: inquiries before rustling up the stairs as though nothing had happened.
• 1:30:09
  Speaker 1: But behind her she was quite conscious she had left
• 1:30:12
  Speaker 1: a wake of whispered comment and suppressed giggling. On the
• 1:30:15
  Speaker 1: first landing, she hesitated. The rest of the steps she
• 1:30:19
  Speaker 1: mounted more slowly. She was always unequal to a serious
• 1:30:23
  Speaker 1: situation and was afraid of the inevitable explanation with Edgar.
• 1:30:28
  Speaker 1: She was guilty. She could not deny that, and she
• 1:30:31
  Speaker 1: dreaded the child's curious gaze, which paralyzed her and filled
• 1:30:34
  Speaker 1: her with uncertainty. In her timidity, she decided to try gentleness,
• 1:30:40
  Speaker 1: because in a battle, the excited child she knew was
• 1:30:43
  Speaker 1: the stronger. She turned the knob gently. Edgar was sitting there,
• 1:30:47
  Speaker 1: quiet and cool, His eyes turned upon her at her entrance,
• 1:30:52
  Speaker 1: not even betraying curiosity. He seemed to be very sure
• 1:30:56
  Speaker 1: of himself. Edgar, she began in the mother of tones.
• 1:31:01
  Speaker 1: What got into you. I was ashamed of you. How
• 1:31:04
  Speaker 1: can one be so ill bred, especially a child, to
• 1:31:07
  Speaker 1: a grown up person. You must ask the Baron's pardon
• 1:31:11
  Speaker 1: at once. I will not. As he spoke, Edgar was
• 1:31:15
  Speaker 1: looking out of the window, and his words might have
• 1:31:18
  Speaker 1: been meant for the trees. His sureness was beginning to
• 1:31:21
  Speaker 1: astonish his mother. Edgar, what's the matter with you? You're
• 1:31:26
  Speaker 1: so different from what you were. You used to be
• 1:31:28
  Speaker 1: a good, sensible child with whom a person could reason,
• 1:31:32
  Speaker 1: And all at once you act as though the devil
• 1:31:34
  Speaker 1: had got into you. What have you got against the baron?
• 1:31:38
  Speaker 1: You liked him so much at first he was so
• 1:31:40
  Speaker 1: nice to you, Yes, because he wanted to make your
• 1:31:44
  Speaker 1: acquaintance nonsense. How can you think anything like that? The
• 1:31:49
  Speaker 1: child flared up. He's a liar. He's falls through and through.
• 1:31:54
  Speaker 1: Whatever he does is calculated and common. He wanted to
• 1:31:57
  Speaker 1: get to know you, so he made friends with me
• 1:32:00
  Speaker 1: and promised me a dog. I don't know what he
• 1:32:03
  Speaker 1: promised you, or why he's so friendly with you, but
• 1:32:06
  Speaker 1: he wants something of you, too, Mamma. Positively he does.
• 1:32:10
  Speaker 1: If he didn't, he wouldn't be so polite and friendly.
• 1:32:13
  Speaker 1: He's a bad man. He lies. Just take a good
• 1:32:17
  Speaker 1: look at him once and see how false his eyes are.
• 1:32:20
  Speaker 1: Oh I hate him, Edgar? How can you talk like that?
• 1:32:25
  Speaker 1: She was confused and did not know what to reply.
• 1:32:28
  Speaker 1: The feeling stirred in her that the child was right. Yes,
• 1:32:32
  Speaker 1: he's a bad man. You can't make me believe he isn't.
• 1:32:35
  Speaker 1: You must see he is. Why is he afraid of me?
• 1:32:39
  Speaker 1: Why does he try to keep out of my way
• 1:32:41
  Speaker 1: because he knows I can see through him and his badness?
• 1:32:45
  Speaker 1: How can you talk like that? She kept protesting feebly.
• 1:32:49
  Speaker 1: Her brain seemed to have dried up. All of a sudden,
• 1:32:53
  Speaker 1: a great fear came upon her, whether of the baron
• 1:32:56
  Speaker 1: or the boy she knew not. Edgar saw that his
• 1:32:59
  Speaker 1: warning was taking effect, and he was lured on to
• 1:33:02
  Speaker 1: win her over to his side and have a comrade
• 1:33:05
  Speaker 1: in his hate and hostility toward the baron. He went
• 1:33:09
  Speaker 1: over to her, gently, put his arms about her, and said,
• 1:33:12
  Speaker 1: in a voice flattering with the excitement quivering in it, Mamma,
• 1:33:17
  Speaker 1: you yourself must have noticed that it isn't anything good
• 1:33:20
  Speaker 1: that he wants. He's made you quite different. You're the
• 1:33:23
  Speaker 1: one that's changed, not I. He set you against me,
• 1:33:27
  Speaker 1: just to have you to himself. I'm sure he means
• 1:33:30
  Speaker 1: to deceive you. I don't know what he promised you,
• 1:33:32
  Speaker 1: but whatever it is, he doesn't intend to keep his promise.
• 1:33:36
  Speaker 1: You ought to be careful of him. A man who
• 1:33:39
  Speaker 1: will lie to one person will lie to another person too.
• 1:33:42
  Speaker 1: He's a bad, bad man. You mustn't trust him. Edgar's voice,
• 1:33:48
  Speaker 1: soft and almost tearful, seemed to speak out of her
• 1:33:52
  Speaker 1: own heart. Since the day before, an uncomfortable feeling had
• 1:33:56
  Speaker 1: been rising in her which told her the same with
• 1:33:58
  Speaker 1: growing emphasis. But she was ashamed to tell her own
• 1:34:02
  Speaker 1: child he was right, and she took refuge, as so
• 1:34:06
  Speaker 1: many do when under the stress of overwhelming feeling. In
• 1:34:09
  Speaker 1: rude rejoinder, she straightened herself up. Children, don't understand these things.
• 1:34:15
  Speaker 1: You have no right to mix into such matters. You
• 1:34:18
  Speaker 1: must behave yourself, that's all. Edgar's face congealed again. Very well,
• 1:34:24
  Speaker 1: I have warned you. Then you won't ask the baron's pardon. No,
• 1:34:30
  Speaker 1: they stood confronting each other, and the mother knew her
• 1:34:33
  Speaker 1: authority was at stake. Then you will stay up here
• 1:34:36
  Speaker 1: and eat by yourself, and you won't be allowed to
• 1:34:39
  Speaker 1: come to table and sit with us until you have
• 1:34:41
  Speaker 1: asked his pardon. I'll teach you manners. You won't budge
• 1:34:45
  Speaker 1: from this room until I give you permission to do
• 1:34:47
  Speaker 1: you hear Edgar smiled. That cunning smile seemed to be
• 1:34:52
  Speaker 1: part of his lips. Now inwardly, he was angry at himself.
• 1:34:56
  Speaker 1: How foolish to have let his heart run away with
• 1:34:59
  Speaker 1: him again, and to have tried to warn her the
• 1:35:02
  Speaker 1: liar his mother rustled out without giving him another glance.
• 1:35:07
  Speaker 1: That caustic gaze of his frightened her. The child had
• 1:35:11
  Speaker 1: become an absolute annoyance to her since she realized that
• 1:35:14
  Speaker 1: he had his eyes open and said the very things
• 1:35:17
  Speaker 1: she did not want to know or hear. It was
• 1:35:20
  Speaker 1: uncanny to have an inner voice, her conscience dissevered from herself,
• 1:35:25
  Speaker 1: incorporated in her child, going about as her child, warning
• 1:35:29
  Speaker 1: her and making fun of her. Until then, the child
• 1:35:32
  Speaker 1: had stayed alongside of her life as an ornament, a toy,
• 1:35:36
  Speaker 1: a thing to love and have confidence in now and then,
• 1:35:39
  Speaker 1: perhaps a burden, but always something that floated along in
• 1:35:42
  Speaker 1: the same current as her own life, keeping even pace
• 1:35:46
  Speaker 1: with it. For the first time, this something reared itself
• 1:35:49
  Speaker 1: up and opposed her will. A feeling akin to hate
• 1:35:53
  Speaker 1: mingled itself in her thoughts of her child now. And
• 1:35:56
  Speaker 1: yet as she was descending the stairs, a little, tired,
• 1:36:00
  Speaker 1: childish voice came from her own breast, saying, you ought
• 1:36:04
  Speaker 1: to be careful of him. On one of the landings
• 1:36:07
  Speaker 1: was a mirror. The gleam of it struck her eyes,
• 1:36:10
  Speaker 1: and she paused to scrutinize herself Questioningly. She looked deeper
• 1:36:15
  Speaker 1: and deeper into her own face, until the lips of
• 1:36:17
  Speaker 1: her image parted in a light smile and formed themselves
• 1:36:21
  Speaker 1: as if to utter a dangerous word. The voice within
• 1:36:25
  Speaker 1: her was still speaking, but she threw back her shoulders
• 1:36:28
  Speaker 1: as though to shake off all those invisible thoughts gave
• 1:36:32
  Speaker 1: her reflection in the glass. A bright glance caught up
• 1:36:35
  Speaker 1: her skirt, and descended the rest of the stairs with
• 1:36:38
  Speaker 1: the determined manner of a player who has tossed his
• 1:36:41
  Speaker 1: last coin down on the table. End of chapter nine,
• 1:36:53
  Speaker 1: Chapter ten of The Burning Secret by Stefan Speig. The
• 1:36:56
  Speaker 1: sleebrivox recording is in the public domain. On the trail,
• 1:37:02
  Speaker 1: the waiter, after serving Edgar with dinner in his room,
• 1:37:06
  Speaker 1: closed and locked the door behind him. The child started
• 1:37:09
  Speaker 1: up in a rage his mother's doings. She must have
• 1:37:13
  Speaker 1: given orders for him to be locked in like a
• 1:37:15
  Speaker 1: vicious beast. What's going on downstairs, he brooded grimly. While
• 1:37:21
  Speaker 1: I am locked in up here? What are they talking about?
• 1:37:24
  Speaker 1: I wonder? Is the mystery taking place? And am I
• 1:37:27
  Speaker 1: missing it? Oh? This secret that I sent all around
• 1:37:31
  Speaker 1: me when I am with grown ups, This thing that
• 1:37:34
  Speaker 1: they shut me out from at night, and that makes
• 1:37:37
  Speaker 1: them lower their voices when I come upon them unawares.
• 1:37:40
  Speaker 1: This great secret that has been near me for days,
• 1:37:43
  Speaker 1: close at hand, yet still out of reach. I've done
• 1:37:46
  Speaker 1: everything to try to get at it. Edgar recalled the
• 1:37:50
  Speaker 1: time when he had pilfered books from his father's library
• 1:37:53
  Speaker 1: and had read them and found they contained the mystery,
• 1:37:57
  Speaker 1: though he could not understand it. There must be some
• 1:38:00
  Speaker 1: sort of seal, he concluded, either in himself or in
• 1:38:03
  Speaker 1: the others, that at first to be removed before the
• 1:38:06
  Speaker 1: mystery could be fathomed. He also recalled how he had
• 1:38:10
  Speaker 1: begged the servant girl to explain the obscure passages in
• 1:38:14
  Speaker 1: the books, and she had only laughed at him. Dreadful,
• 1:38:17
  Speaker 1: he thought to be a child full of curiosity, and
• 1:38:21
  Speaker 1: yet not to be allowed even to ask for information,
• 1:38:24
  Speaker 1: always to be ridiculed by the grown ups, as if
• 1:38:27
  Speaker 1: one were as stupid good for nothing. But never mind,
• 1:38:31
  Speaker 1: I'm going to find it out, and very soon, I
• 1:38:34
  Speaker 1: feel sure I will. Already part of it is in
• 1:38:37
  Speaker 1: my hands, and I mean not to let go till
• 1:38:40
  Speaker 1: I hold the whole of it. He listened to find
• 1:38:43
  Speaker 1: out if any one were coming to the room. Outside,
• 1:38:46
  Speaker 1: the trees were rustling in a strong breeze, which caught
• 1:38:49
  Speaker 1: up the silvery mirror of the moonlight and dashed it
• 1:38:52
  Speaker 1: in shivering bits through the network of the branches. It
• 1:38:56
  Speaker 1: can't be anything good that they intend to do, else
• 1:38:59
  Speaker 1: they wouldn't have used such mean little lies to get
• 1:39:02
  Speaker 1: me out of their way. Of course, they're laughing at me,
• 1:39:05
  Speaker 1: the miserable creatures, because they're rid of me at last.
• 1:39:09
  Speaker 1: But I'll be the one to laugh next. How stupid
• 1:39:12
  Speaker 1: of me to allow myself to be locked in this
• 1:39:15
  Speaker 1: room and give them a moment to themselves instead of
• 1:39:18
  Speaker 1: sticking to them like a bird and watching their every move.
• 1:39:22
  Speaker 1: I know the grown ups are always incautious, and they
• 1:39:25
  Speaker 1: will be giving themselves away too. Grown ups think we're
• 1:39:28
  Speaker 1: still babies and always go to sleep at night they forget.
• 1:39:32
  Speaker 1: We can pretend to be asleep and can go on listening,
• 1:39:36
  Speaker 1: and we can make out we're stupid when we're really
• 1:39:39
  Speaker 1: very bright. Edgar smiled to himself sarcastically, when at this
• 1:39:44
  Speaker 1: point his thoughts reverted to the birth of a baby
• 1:39:46
  Speaker 1: cousin the family in his presence had pretended to be surprised,
• 1:39:51
  Speaker 1: and he had known very well they were not surprised,
• 1:39:54
  Speaker 1: because for weeks he had heard them at night when
• 1:39:57
  Speaker 1: they thought he was asleep, discussing the coming event. And
• 1:40:01
  Speaker 1: he resolved to fool his mother and the baron in
• 1:40:04
  Speaker 1: the same way. Oh, if only I could peep through
• 1:40:07
  Speaker 1: the keyhole and watch them while they fancy they were
• 1:40:10
  Speaker 1: alone and safe. Perhaps it would be a good idea
• 1:40:13
  Speaker 1: to ring, and the boy would come and open the
• 1:40:15
  Speaker 1: door and ask what I want. Or I could make
• 1:40:18
  Speaker 1: a terrible noise smashing things, and then they'd unlock the
• 1:40:21
  Speaker 1: door and I'd slip out. On second thought, he decided
• 1:40:25
  Speaker 1: against either plan as incompatible with his pride. No one
• 1:40:29
  Speaker 1: should see how contemptibly he had been treated, and he
• 1:40:32
  Speaker 1: would wait till the next day. From beneath his window
• 1:40:36
  Speaker 1: came a woman's laugh. Edgar started. Perhaps it was his
• 1:40:40
  Speaker 1: mother laughing. She had good cause to laugh and made
• 1:40:44
  Speaker 1: fun of the helpless little boy who was locked up
• 1:40:46
  Speaker 1: when he was a nuisance and thrown into a corner
• 1:40:49
  Speaker 1: like a bundle of rags. He leaned circumspectly out of
• 1:40:53
  Speaker 1: the window and looked. No, it wasn't his mother, but
• 1:40:56
  Speaker 1: one of a group of gay girls teasing a boy
• 1:41:00
  Speaker 1: in Looking out Edgar observed that his window was not
• 1:41:03
  Speaker 1: very high above the ground, and instantly it occurred to
• 1:41:06
  Speaker 1: him to jump down and go spy on his mother
• 1:41:09
  Speaker 1: and the baron. He was all fire with the joy
• 1:41:12
  Speaker 1: of his resolve, feeling that now he had the great
• 1:41:15
  Speaker 1: secret in his grasp. There was no danger in it,
• 1:41:18
  Speaker 1: No people were passing by, and with that he had
• 1:41:21
  Speaker 1: jumped out, nothing but the light crunch of the gravel
• 1:41:25
  Speaker 1: under his feet to betray his action. In these two days,
• 1:41:29
  Speaker 1: stealing around and spying had become the delight of his life,
• 1:41:33
  Speaker 1: and intense bliss mingled with a faint tremor of alarm,
• 1:41:36
  Speaker 1: filled him now as he tiptoed around the outside of
• 1:41:39
  Speaker 1: the hotel, carefully avoiding the lights, he looked first into
• 1:41:44
  Speaker 1: the dining room. Their seats were empty from window to window,
• 1:41:48
  Speaker 1: he went peeping, always outside the hotel, for fear if
• 1:41:52
  Speaker 1: he went inside he might run up against them in
• 1:41:54
  Speaker 1: one of the corridors. Nowhere were they to be seen,
• 1:41:58
  Speaker 1: and he was about to give up when he saw
• 1:42:01
  Speaker 1: two shadows emerge from a side entrance. He shrank and
• 1:42:04
  Speaker 1: drew back into the dark, and his mother and her
• 1:42:07
  Speaker 1: inseparable escort came out in the nick of time. He thought,
• 1:42:12
  Speaker 1: what were they saying? He couldn't hear They were talking
• 1:42:15
  Speaker 1: in such low voices, and the wind was making such
• 1:42:18
  Speaker 1: an uproar in the trees. His mother laughed. It was
• 1:42:22
  Speaker 1: a laugh he had never before heard from her, a
• 1:42:25
  Speaker 1: peculiarly sharp, nervous laugh, as though she had suddenly been tickled.
• 1:42:30
  Speaker 1: It made a curious impression on the boy, and rather
• 1:42:33
  Speaker 1: startled him. But if she laughs, he thought, it can't
• 1:42:36
  Speaker 1: be anything dangerous, nothing very big and mighty that they
• 1:42:40
  Speaker 1: are concealing from me. He was a trifle disillusioned. Yet
• 1:42:44
  Speaker 1: why were they leaving the hotel? Where were they going alone? Together?
• 1:42:48
  Speaker 1: In the night. Every now and then great drifts of
• 1:42:52
  Speaker 1: clouds obscured the moon, and the darkness was then so
• 1:42:55
  Speaker 1: intense that one could scarcely see the white road at
• 1:42:58
  Speaker 1: one's feet, But soon the moon would emerge again and
• 1:43:02
  Speaker 1: robe the landscape in a sheet of silver. In one
• 1:43:05
  Speaker 1: of the moments when the whole countryside was flooded in brilliance,
• 1:43:09
  Speaker 1: Edgar saw the two silhouettes going down the road, or
• 1:43:12
  Speaker 1: rather one silhouette. So close did they cling together, as
• 1:43:16
  Speaker 1: if in terror. But where were they going? The fir
• 1:43:20
  Speaker 1: trees groaned, the woods were all astir uncannily, as though
• 1:43:24
  Speaker 1: from a wild chase in their depths. I will follow them,
• 1:43:28
  Speaker 1: thought Edgar. They cannot hear me in all this noise.
• 1:43:32
  Speaker 1: Keeping to the edge of the woods, in the shadow,
• 1:43:34
  Speaker 1: from which he could easily see them on the clear
• 1:43:37
  Speaker 1: white road, he tracked them relentlessly, blessing the wind for
• 1:43:41
  Speaker 1: making his footsteps inaudible, and cursing it for carrying away
• 1:43:45
  Speaker 1: the sound of their talk. It was not until he
• 1:43:48
  Speaker 1: heard what they said that he could be sure of
• 1:43:50
  Speaker 1: learning the secret. The baron and his companion walked on
• 1:43:54
  Speaker 1: without any misgivings. They felt all alone in the wide,
• 1:43:58
  Speaker 1: resounding night, and lost them themselves in their growing excitement,
• 1:44:02
  Speaker 1: never dreaming that on the high edges of the road,
• 1:44:04
  Speaker 1: in the leafy darkness, every movement of theirs was being watched,
• 1:44:09
  Speaker 1: and a pair of eyes was clutching them in a
• 1:44:11
  Speaker 1: wild grip of hate and curiosity. Suddenly they stood still,
• 1:44:17
  Speaker 1: and Edgar too instantly stopped and pressed close up against
• 1:44:20
  Speaker 1: a tree, in terror that they might turn back and
• 1:44:23
  Speaker 1: reach the hotel before him, so that his mother would
• 1:44:26
  Speaker 1: discover his room was empty and learn that she had
• 1:44:29
  Speaker 1: been followed. Then he would have to give up hope
• 1:44:32
  Speaker 1: of ever resting the secret from them. But the couple hesitated,
• 1:44:36
  Speaker 1: evidently there was a difference of opinion between them. Fortunately,
• 1:44:40
  Speaker 1: at that moment, the moon was shining, undimmed by clouds,
• 1:44:44
  Speaker 1: and he could see everything clearly. The baron pointed to
• 1:44:48
  Speaker 1: a side path leading down into the valley, where the
• 1:44:51
  Speaker 1: moonlight descended, not in a broad flood of brilliance, but
• 1:44:54
  Speaker 1: only in patches, filtering here and there through the heavy foliage.
• 1:44:59
  Speaker 1: Why does he want go down there? Thought Edgar. His
• 1:45:03
  Speaker 1: mother apparently refused to take the path, and the baron
• 1:45:07
  Speaker 1: was trying to persuade her. Edgar could tell from his
• 1:45:10
  Speaker 1: gestures that he was talking emphatically. The child was alarmed.
• 1:45:14
  Speaker 1: What did this man want of his mother? Why did
• 1:45:17
  Speaker 1: he attempt the villain to drag her into the dark.
• 1:45:21
  Speaker 1: From his books. To him, the world came live, memories
• 1:45:25
  Speaker 1: of murder and seduction and sinister crime. There he had
• 1:45:29
  Speaker 1: it the baron meant to murder her. That was why
• 1:45:32
  Speaker 1: he had kept him Edgar at a distance, and enticed
• 1:45:36
  Speaker 1: her to this lonely spot. Should he cry for help, murder,
• 1:45:40
  Speaker 1: He wanted to shriek, but his throat and lips were dry,
• 1:45:43
  Speaker 1: and no sound issued from his mouth. His nerves were
• 1:45:47
  Speaker 1: tense as a bowstring. He could scarcely stand upright on
• 1:45:50
  Speaker 1: his shaking knees, and he put out his hand for
• 1:45:53
  Speaker 1: support when crack, crack, a twig snapped in his grasp.
• 1:45:58
  Speaker 1: At the sound of the breaking twig, the two turned
• 1:46:01
  Speaker 1: about in alarm and stared into the darkness. Edgar clung
• 1:46:05
  Speaker 1: to the tree, his little body completely wrapped in obscurity,
• 1:46:09
  Speaker 1: quiet as death. Yet they seemed to have been frightened.
• 1:46:14
  Speaker 1: Let's go home, he could now hear his mother say anxiously,
• 1:46:17
  Speaker 1: and the Baron, who evidently was also upset assented, pressed
• 1:46:22
  Speaker 1: close against each other. They walked back very slowly. Their
• 1:46:26
  Speaker 1: embarrassment was Edgar's good fortune. He got down on all
• 1:46:30
  Speaker 1: fours and crept tearing his hands and clothes on the brambles,
• 1:46:34
  Speaker 1: through the undergrowth to the turn of the woods, from
• 1:46:37
  Speaker 1: where he ran breathlessly back to the hotel and up
• 1:46:40
  Speaker 1: the stairs to his room. Luckily the key was sticking
• 1:46:44
  Speaker 1: on the outside, and in one second he was in
• 1:46:47
  Speaker 1: his room, lying on the bed, where he had to
• 1:46:49
  Speaker 1: rest a few moments to give his pounding heart a
• 1:46:52
  Speaker 1: chance to quiet down. After two or three minutes, he
• 1:46:56
  Speaker 1: got up and looked out of the window to await
• 1:46:58
  Speaker 1: their return. They must have been walking very slowly, indeed,
• 1:47:03
  Speaker 1: it took them in eternity circumspectly. He peeped out of
• 1:47:07
  Speaker 1: the shadowed frame. There At length they came at a
• 1:47:10
  Speaker 1: snail's pace, the moonlight shining on their clothes. They looked
• 1:47:15
  Speaker 1: like ghosts in the greenish shimmer, and the delicious horror
• 1:47:18
  Speaker 1: came upon him again whether it really might have been
• 1:47:21
  Speaker 1: a murder, and what a dreadful catastrophe he had averted
• 1:47:24
  Speaker 1: by his presence. He could clearly see their faces, which
• 1:47:28
  Speaker 1: looked chalky in the white light. His mother had an
• 1:47:31
  Speaker 1: expression of rapture that in her was strange to him,
• 1:47:35
  Speaker 1: while the baron looked hard and dejected, probably because he
• 1:47:39
  Speaker 1: had failed in carrying out his purpose. They were very
• 1:47:42
  Speaker 1: close to the hotel now, but it was not until
• 1:47:45
  Speaker 1: they reached the steps that their figures separated from each other.
• 1:47:49
  Speaker 1: Would they look up? Edgar waited eagerly. No, they have
• 1:47:54
  Speaker 1: forgotten all about me, he thought, wrathfully, and then in triumph.
• 1:47:58
  Speaker 1: But I haven't forgotten you. You think I'm asleep or nonexistent,
• 1:48:03
  Speaker 1: But you'll find out you're mistaken. I'll watch every step
• 1:48:06
  Speaker 1: you take until I've got the secret out of you,
• 1:48:09
  Speaker 1: you villain, the dreadful secret that keeps me awake nights.
• 1:48:13
  Speaker 1: I'll tear the strings that tie you two together. I
• 1:48:16
  Speaker 1: Am not going to go to sleep. As the couple
• 1:48:19
  Speaker 1: entered the doorway, their shadows mingled again in one broad
• 1:48:23
  Speaker 1: band that soon dwindled and disappeared, and once more the
• 1:48:27
  Speaker 1: space in front of the hotel lay serene in the moonlight,
• 1:48:30
  Speaker 1: like a meadow of snow. End of chapter ten, Chapter
• 1:48:41
  Speaker 1: eleven of The Burning Secret by Stefan Speig. This LibriVox
• 1:48:46
  Speaker 1: recording is in the public domain. Chapter eleven, the surprise attack.
• 1:48:52
  Speaker 1: Edgar moved away from the window, breathing heavily in a
• 1:48:55
  Speaker 1: shiver of horror. A gruesome mystery of this sort had
• 1:48:59
  Speaker 1: never touched his life before, the bookish world of thrilling adventure, excitement, deception,
• 1:49:05
  Speaker 1: and murder, having always belonged to the same realm as
• 1:49:08
  Speaker 1: the wonderland of fairy tales, the realm of dreams far
• 1:49:12
  Speaker 1: away in the unreal and unattainable. Now he was plunged
• 1:49:17
  Speaker 1: right into the midst of this fascinatingly awful world, and
• 1:49:20
  Speaker 1: his whole being quivered deliriously. Who was this mysterious being
• 1:49:25
  Speaker 1: who had stepped into his quiet life? Was he really
• 1:49:29
  Speaker 1: a murderer? If not, why did he always try to
• 1:49:32
  Speaker 1: drag his mother to a remote dark spot? Something dreadful
• 1:49:37
  Speaker 1: Edgar felt certain was about to happen. He did not
• 1:49:40
  Speaker 1: know what to do. In the morning, he would surely
• 1:49:43
  Speaker 1: write or telegraph his father, or why not. That very moment,
• 1:49:48
  Speaker 1: his mother was not in her room yet, but was
• 1:49:50
  Speaker 1: still with that horrid person. The outside of the door
• 1:49:54
  Speaker 1: to Edgar's room was hung with a portier, and he
• 1:49:57
  Speaker 1: opened his door softly, now closed it behind him, and
• 1:50:01
  Speaker 1: stuck himself between the door and the portier, listening for
• 1:50:04
  Speaker 1: his mother's steps in the corridor, determined not to let
• 1:50:08
  Speaker 1: her stay by herself. A single instant. The corridor at
• 1:50:12
  Speaker 1: this midnight hour was quiet and empty, and lighted faintly
• 1:50:15
  Speaker 1: by a single gas jet. The minutes stretched themselves into hours,
• 1:50:20
  Speaker 1: it seemed, before he heard cautious footsteps coming up the stairs.
• 1:50:24
  Speaker 1: He strained his ears to listen. The steps did not
• 1:50:27
  Speaker 1: move forward with a quick, regular beat of someone making
• 1:50:31
  Speaker 1: straight for his room, but sounded hesitating and dragging, as
• 1:50:34
  Speaker 1: though up a steep, difficult climb. Edgar also caught the
• 1:50:39
  Speaker 1: sound of whispering, a pause, then whispering again. He was
• 1:50:43
  Speaker 1: a quiver with excitement. Was it both of them coming
• 1:50:46
  Speaker 1: up together? Was the creature still sticking to her? The
• 1:50:50
  Speaker 1: whispering was too low and far away for him to
• 1:50:53
  Speaker 1: catch what they were saying. But the footsteps, though slowly
• 1:50:57
  Speaker 1: and with pauses between, were drawing nearer. And now he
• 1:51:01
  Speaker 1: could hear the baron's voice. Oh how he hated the
• 1:51:04
  Speaker 1: sound of it, saying something in a low, hoarse tone
• 1:51:08
  Speaker 1: which he could not get. And then his mother answering
• 1:51:11
  Speaker 1: as though to ward something off. No, no, not to night.
• 1:51:16
  Speaker 1: Edgar's excitement rose to fever heat as they came nearer.
• 1:51:20
  Speaker 1: He would be bound to catch everything they said. Each
• 1:51:23
  Speaker 1: inch closer that they drew was like a physical hurt
• 1:51:26
  Speaker 1: in his breast. And the baron's voice, how ugly it seemed,
• 1:51:31
  Speaker 1: that greedy, grasping, disgusting voice. Don't be cruel, you were
• 1:51:36
  Speaker 1: so lovely this evening. No, No, I mustn't. I can't
• 1:51:41
  Speaker 1: let me go. There was such alarm in his mother's
• 1:51:45
  Speaker 1: voice that the child was terrified. What did the baron
• 1:51:48
  Speaker 1: want her to do? Why was she afraid? They were
• 1:51:52
  Speaker 1: quite close up to him now, apparently right in front
• 1:51:55
  Speaker 1: of the portiere a foot or two away from them.
• 1:51:58
  Speaker 1: Was he trembling invisible with a bit of drapery for
• 1:52:02
  Speaker 1: his only protection? Edgar heard his mother give a faint groan,
• 1:52:07
  Speaker 1: as though her powers of resistance were weakening. But what
• 1:52:10
  Speaker 1: was that? Edgar could hear that they had passed his
• 1:52:13
  Speaker 1: mother's door and had kept on walking down the corridor.
• 1:52:17
  Speaker 1: Where was he dragging her off to? Why was she
• 1:52:20
  Speaker 1: not replying any more? Had he stuffed his handkerchief into
• 1:52:24
  Speaker 1: her mouth? And was he squeezing her throat? Wild with
• 1:52:28
  Speaker 1: this thought, Edgar pushed the portiere aside and peeped out
• 1:52:32
  Speaker 1: at the two figures in the dim corridor. The baron
• 1:52:35
  Speaker 1: had his arm round the woman's waist and was forcing
• 1:52:37
  Speaker 1: her along gently, evidently with little resistance from her. He
• 1:52:42
  Speaker 1: stopped at his own door. He wants to drag her
• 1:52:46
  Speaker 1: in and commit the foul deed, thought the child, and
• 1:52:49
  Speaker 1: dashing the portiere aside, he rushed down the hall upon them.
• 1:52:53
  Speaker 1: His mother screamed. Something came leaping at her out of
• 1:52:57
  Speaker 1: the dark, and she seemed to fall in a faint.
• 1:53:00
  Speaker 1: The baron held her up with difficulty. The next instant
• 1:53:04
  Speaker 1: he felt a little fist dealing him a blow that
• 1:53:06
  Speaker 1: smashed his lips against his teeth, and a little body
• 1:53:09
  Speaker 1: clawing at him catlike. He released the terrified woman, who
• 1:53:13
  Speaker 1: quickly made her escape, and without knowing against whom he
• 1:53:17
  Speaker 1: struck out blindly, the child knew he was the weaker
• 1:53:21
  Speaker 1: of the two, yet he never yielded. At last, at last,
• 1:53:25
  Speaker 1: the great moment had come when he could unburden himself
• 1:53:28
  Speaker 1: of all his betrayed love and accumulated hate. With set
• 1:53:32
  Speaker 1: lips and a look of frenzy on his face, he
• 1:53:35
  Speaker 1: pounded away at the baron with his two small fists.
• 1:53:38
  Speaker 1: By this time the baron had recognized his assailant. He
• 1:53:42
  Speaker 1: too was primed with hate of the little spy who
• 1:53:45
  Speaker 1: had been dogging him and interfering with his sport, and
• 1:53:48
  Speaker 1: he hit back, striking out blindly. Edgar groaned once or twice,
• 1:53:54
  Speaker 1: but did not let go and did not cry for help.
• 1:53:57
  Speaker 1: They wrestled a fraction of a minute in the dark,
• 1:54:00
  Speaker 1: ardor grimly and sullenly, without the exchange of a single word.
• 1:54:04
  Speaker 1: But pretty soon the baron came to his senses, and,
• 1:54:07
  Speaker 1: realizing how absurd was this duel with a half grown boy,
• 1:54:12
  Speaker 1: he caught hold of Edgar to throw him off. But Edgar,
• 1:54:15
  Speaker 1: feeling his muscles weakening and conscious that the next moment
• 1:54:18
  Speaker 1: he would be beaten, snapped in a fury at the strong,
• 1:54:22
  Speaker 1: firm hand gripping at the nape of his neck. The
• 1:54:25
  Speaker 1: baron could not restrain a slight outcry and let go
• 1:54:29
  Speaker 1: of Edgar, who seized the opportunity to run to his
• 1:54:31
  Speaker 1: room and draw the bolt. The midnight struggle had lasted
• 1:54:35
  Speaker 1: no more than a minute. No one in any of
• 1:54:38
  Speaker 1: the rooms along the corridor had caught a sound of it.
• 1:54:41
  Speaker 1: Everything was silent, wrapped in sleep. The baron wiped his
• 1:54:46
  Speaker 1: bleeding hand with his handkerchief and peered into the dark
• 1:54:49
  Speaker 1: uneasily to make sure no one had been watching or listening.
• 1:54:53
  Speaker 1: All he saw was the one ghas jed winking at him,
• 1:54:56
  Speaker 1: he thought sarcastically. End of chapter eleven, Chapter twelve of
• 1:55:08
  Speaker 1: The Burning Secret by Stefan Speig. This LibriVox recording is
• 1:55:13
  Speaker 1: in the public domain. Chapter twelve, The Tempest. Edgar woke
• 1:55:18
  Speaker 1: up the next morning, dazed, wondering whether it had not
• 1:55:21
  Speaker 1: been a horrid dream, and with a sickly feeling that
• 1:55:25
  Speaker 1: hangs on after a nightmare, his head leaden and his
• 1:55:28
  Speaker 1: body like a piece of wood. It was only after
• 1:55:31
  Speaker 1: a minute or so that he realized, with a sort
• 1:55:34
  Speaker 1: of alarm, that he was still in his day clothes.
• 1:55:37
  Speaker 1: He jumped out of bed and went to look at
• 1:55:39
  Speaker 1: himself in the mirror. The image of his own pale,
• 1:55:42
  Speaker 1: distorted face, with his hair all rumpled and a red,
• 1:55:45
  Speaker 1: elongated swelling on his forehead made him recoil with a shudder.
• 1:55:50
  Speaker 1: It brought back to him the actuality painfully. He recalled
• 1:55:54
  Speaker 1: the details of the battle in the corridor, and his
• 1:55:57
  Speaker 1: rushing back to his room and throwing himself on to
• 1:56:00
  Speaker 1: the bed dressed. He must have fallen asleep thus and
• 1:56:04
  Speaker 1: dreamed everything all over again, only worse and mingled with
• 1:56:08
  Speaker 1: the warmish smell of fresh flowing blood. Footsteps crunched on
• 1:56:12
  Speaker 1: the gravel beneath his window, voices rose like invisible birds,
• 1:56:17
  Speaker 1: and the sun shone deep into the room. It must
• 1:56:20
  Speaker 1: be very late, he thought, glancing at his watch, but
• 1:56:23
  Speaker 1: the hands pointed to midnight. In the excitement of the
• 1:56:27
  Speaker 1: day before, he had forgotten to wind it up. This uncertainty,
• 1:56:31
  Speaker 1: this hanging suspended in time, disturbed him, and his sense
• 1:56:35
  Speaker 1: of disgust was increased by his confusion of mind as
• 1:56:38
  Speaker 1: to what had actually occurred. He dressed quickly and went downstairs,
• 1:56:43
  Speaker 1: a vague sense of guilt in his heart. In the
• 1:56:46
  Speaker 1: breakfast room, his mother was sitting at the usual table alone.
• 1:56:50
  Speaker 1: Thank goodness, his enemy was not present Edgar would not
• 1:56:54
  Speaker 1: have to look upon that hateful face of his. And
• 1:56:57
  Speaker 1: yet as he went to the table, he was by
• 1:56:59
  Speaker 1: no means sure of himself. Good morning, he said. His
• 1:57:04
  Speaker 1: mother made no reply, nor even so much as glanced up,
• 1:57:08
  Speaker 1: but kept her eyes fixed in a peculiarly rigid stare
• 1:57:12
  Speaker 1: on the view from the window. She looked very pale,
• 1:57:15
  Speaker 1: her eyes were red rimmed, and there was that quivering
• 1:57:18
  Speaker 1: of her nostrils which told so plainly how wrought up
• 1:57:21
  Speaker 1: she was, edgar bit his lips. Her silence bewildered him.
• 1:57:27
  Speaker 1: He really did not know whether he had hurt the
• 1:57:29
  Speaker 1: baron very much, or whether his mother had any knowledge
• 1:57:32
  Speaker 1: at all of their encounter. The uncertainty plagued him. But
• 1:57:36
  Speaker 1: her face remained so rigid that he did not even
• 1:57:38
  Speaker 1: attempt to look up, for fear that her eyes, now
• 1:57:41
  Speaker 1: hidden behind lowered lids, might suddenly raise their curtains and
• 1:57:45
  Speaker 1: pop out at him. He sat very still, not daring
• 1:57:49
  Speaker 1: to make the faintest sound, and raised the cup to
• 1:57:52
  Speaker 1: his lips and putting it back on the saucer with
• 1:57:54
  Speaker 1: the utmost caution, and casting furtive glances from time to
• 1:57:58
  Speaker 1: time at his mother's fingers, which played with her spoon
• 1:58:01
  Speaker 1: nervously and seemed in the way they were bent to
• 1:58:04
  Speaker 1: show a secret anger. For a full quarter of an
• 1:58:08
  Speaker 1: hour he sat at the table in an oppressive expectancy
• 1:58:11
  Speaker 1: of something that never came, not a single word from
• 1:58:15
  Speaker 1: her to relieve his tension. And now as his mother
• 1:58:18
  Speaker 1: rose still without any sign of having noticed his presence,
• 1:58:22
  Speaker 1: he did not know what to do, whether to remain
• 1:58:24
  Speaker 1: sitting at the table or to go with her. He
• 1:58:28
  Speaker 1: decided upon the latter, and followed humbly, though conscious how
• 1:58:31
  Speaker 1: ridiculous was his shadowing of her. Now he reduced his
• 1:58:35
  Speaker 1: steps so as to fall behind, and she, still studiously,
• 1:58:39
  Speaker 1: refraining from noticing him, went to her room. When Edgar
• 1:58:43
  Speaker 1: reached her door, he found it locked. What had happened?
• 1:58:48
  Speaker 1: He was at his wits end. His assurance of the
• 1:58:50
  Speaker 1: day before had deserted him. Had he done wrong after
• 1:58:54
  Speaker 1: all in attacking the baron? And were they preparing a
• 1:58:57
  Speaker 1: punishment for him or a fresh humiliation? Something must happen,
• 1:59:02
  Speaker 1: he was positive, something dreadful. Very soon upon him and
• 1:59:06
  Speaker 1: his mother lay the sultriness of a brewing tempest. They
• 1:59:10
  Speaker 1: were like two electrified poles that would have to discharge
• 1:59:13
  Speaker 1: themselves in a flash. And for four solitary hours the
• 1:59:17
  Speaker 1: child dragged round with him from room to room the
• 1:59:20
  Speaker 1: burden of this premonition, until his thin little neck bent
• 1:59:24
  Speaker 1: under the invisible yoke. And by midday it was a
• 1:59:27
  Speaker 1: very humble little fellow that took his seat at table.
• 1:59:31
  Speaker 1: How do you do? He ventured, again, feeling he had
• 1:59:34
  Speaker 1: to rend this silence ominous as a great black storm cloud.
• 1:59:39
  Speaker 1: But still his mother made no response, keeping her gaze
• 1:59:43
  Speaker 1: fixed beyond him. Edgar, in renewed alarm, felt he was
• 1:59:47
  Speaker 1: in the presence of a calculated, concentrated anger, such as
• 1:59:51
  Speaker 1: he had never before encountered. Until then, his mother's scoldings
• 1:59:55
  Speaker 1: had been outbursts of nervousness rather than of ill feeling,
• 1:59:59
  Speaker 1: and soon melt melted into a mollifying smile. This time, however,
• 2:00:03
  Speaker 1: he had, as he sensed, brought to the surface a
• 2:00:06
  Speaker 1: wild emotion from the deeps of her being. And this
• 2:00:10
  Speaker 1: powerful something that he had evoked terrified him. He scarcely
• 2:00:14
  Speaker 1: dared to eat. His throat was parched and knotted into
• 2:00:17
  Speaker 1: a lump. His mother seemed not to notice what was
• 2:00:21
  Speaker 1: passing in her son, but when she got up, she
• 2:00:23
  Speaker 1: turned with a casual air and said, come up to
• 2:00:27
  Speaker 1: my room afterwards, Edgar, I have something to say to you.
• 2:00:32
  Speaker 1: Her tone was not threatening, but so icy that Edgar
• 2:00:35
  Speaker 1: felt as though each word were like a link in
• 2:00:38
  Speaker 1: an iron chain being laid round his neck. His defiance
• 2:00:42
  Speaker 1: had been crushed out of him. Silently with a hang
• 2:00:45
  Speaker 1: dog air, he followed her up to her room. In
• 2:00:49
  Speaker 1: the room, she prolonged his agony by saying nothing for
• 2:00:52
  Speaker 1: several minutes, during which he heard the striking of the clock,
• 2:00:55
  Speaker 1: and outside a child laughing, and within his own breast,
• 2:00:59
  Speaker 1: his heart beating like a trip hammer. Yet she too
• 2:01:03
  Speaker 1: could not be feeling so very confident of herself either,
• 2:01:06
  Speaker 1: because she kept her eyes averted and even turned her
• 2:01:09
  Speaker 1: back while speaking to him. I shall say nothing to
• 2:01:13
  Speaker 1: you about the way you behaved yesterday. It was unpardonable,
• 2:01:17
  Speaker 1: and it makes me feel ashamed to think of it.
• 2:01:20
  Speaker 1: You have to suffer the consequences now of your own conduct.
• 2:01:24
  Speaker 1: All I mean to say to you is that this
• 2:01:26
  Speaker 1: is the last time you will be allowed to associate
• 2:01:29
  Speaker 1: with your elders. I have just written to your father
• 2:01:32
  Speaker 1: that either you must be put under a tutor or
• 2:01:34
  Speaker 1: sent to a boarding school where you will be taught manners.
• 2:01:38
  Speaker 1: I shan't be bothered with you any more. Edgar stood
• 2:01:42
  Speaker 1: with bowed head, feeling that this was only the preliminary,
• 2:01:45
  Speaker 1: a thread of the real thing coming, and he waited
• 2:01:48
  Speaker 1: uneasily for the sequel. You will ask the baron's pardon.
• 2:01:53
  Speaker 1: Edgar gave a start, but his mother would not be interrupted.
• 2:01:56
  Speaker 1: The Baron left to day, and you will write him
• 2:01:59
  Speaker 1: a letter which I shall dictate. Edgar again made a
• 2:02:03
  Speaker 1: movement which his mother firmly disregarded no Protestations. Here is
• 2:02:08
  Speaker 1: the paper, and here are the pen in the ink.
• 2:02:10
  Speaker 1: Sit down. Edgar looked up. Her eyes were steely, with
• 2:02:15
  Speaker 1: an inflexible determination. This hardness and composure in his mother
• 2:02:20
  Speaker 1: were quite new and strange. He was frightened and seated
• 2:02:23
  Speaker 1: himself at the desk, keeping his face bent low. The
• 2:02:27
  Speaker 1: date upper right hand corner. Have you written it space,
• 2:02:32
  Speaker 1: dear sir colon next line, I have just learned, to
• 2:02:37
  Speaker 1: my regret, got that to my regret that you have
• 2:02:41
  Speaker 1: already left summering two ms in summering, and so I
• 2:02:46
  Speaker 1: must do by letter what I had intended to do
• 2:02:49
  Speaker 1: in person. That is faster, Edgar. You don't have to
• 2:02:53
  Speaker 1: draw each letter. Beg your pardon for what I did yesterday.
• 2:02:57
  Speaker 1: As my mother told you, I am just convalescing from
• 2:03:01
  Speaker 1: a severe illness and am very excitable. On account of
• 2:03:04
  Speaker 1: my condition, I often exaggerate things. Then the next moment
• 2:03:08
  Speaker 1: I am sorry for it. The back bent over the
• 2:03:11
  Speaker 1: desk straightened up. Edgar turned in a flash. His defiance
• 2:03:15
  Speaker 1: had leaped into life again. I will not write that.
• 2:03:19
  Speaker 1: It isn't true, Edgar, it is not true. I haven't
• 2:03:24
  Speaker 1: done anything that I should be sorry for. I haven't
• 2:03:27
  Speaker 1: done anything bad that I need to ask anybody's pardon for.
• 2:03:31
  Speaker 1: I simply came to your rescue. When you called for help.
• 2:03:34
  Speaker 1: Every drop of blood left her lips, her nostrils widened.
• 2:03:39
  Speaker 1: I called for help. You're crazy. Edgar got angry and
• 2:03:44
  Speaker 1: jumped up from his chair. Yes, you did call for
• 2:03:47
  Speaker 1: help in the carter. When he caught hold of you,
• 2:03:50
  Speaker 1: you said, let me go, let me go, so loud
• 2:03:53
  Speaker 1: that I heard it in my room. You lie. I
• 2:03:57
  Speaker 1: never was in the carter with the baron. He went
• 2:04:00
  Speaker 1: with me only as far as the foot of the stairs.
• 2:04:03
  Speaker 1: Edgar's heart stood still at the bare facedness of the lie.
• 2:04:07
  Speaker 1: He stared at her with glassy eyeballs and cried, in
• 2:04:10
  Speaker 1: a voice thick and husky with passion. You were not
• 2:04:14
  Speaker 1: in the hall, and he he did not have his
• 2:04:18
  Speaker 1: arm round you. She laughed, a cold, dry laugh. You
• 2:04:22
  Speaker 1: were dreaming. That was too much. The child, by this time,
• 2:04:27
  Speaker 1: knew that adults lie and resort to impudent little evasions,
• 2:04:30
  Speaker 1: lies that slipped through fine sieves and cunning ambiguities. But
• 2:04:35
  Speaker 1: this downright denial of an absolute fact face to face
• 2:04:39
  Speaker 1: threw him into a frenzy, dreaming, was I did I
• 2:04:43
  Speaker 1: dream this bump on my forehead too? How do I
• 2:04:47
  Speaker 1: know whom you've been routying with? But I am not
• 2:04:49
  Speaker 1: going to argue with you. You are to obey orders.
• 2:04:52
  Speaker 1: That's all. Sit down and finish the letter. She was
• 2:04:56
  Speaker 1: very pale and was summoning all her strength to keep
• 2:04:59
  Speaker 1: on her feet. In Edgar, a last tiny flame of
• 2:05:03
  Speaker 1: credulity went out to tread on the truth and extinguish
• 2:05:07
  Speaker 1: it as one would a burning match. Was more than
• 2:05:09
  Speaker 1: he could stomach. His insides congealed in an icy lump,
• 2:05:13
  Speaker 1: and everything he now said was in a tone of unrestrained,
• 2:05:17
  Speaker 1: pointed maliciousness. So I dreamed what I saw in the hall?
• 2:05:21
  Speaker 1: Did I? I dreamed this bump on my forehead, and
• 2:05:24
  Speaker 1: that you two went walking in the moonlight, and he
• 2:05:27
  Speaker 1: wanted to make you go down the dark path into
• 2:05:29
  Speaker 1: the valley. I dreamed all that, did I? What do
• 2:05:32
  Speaker 1: you think that I am going to let myself be
• 2:05:34
  Speaker 1: locked up like a baby? No, I am not so
• 2:05:37
  Speaker 1: stupid as you think. I know what I know. He
• 2:05:41
  Speaker 1: stared into her face, impudently to see her child's face
• 2:05:45
  Speaker 1: close to her own, distorted by hate broke her down completely.
• 2:05:50
  Speaker 1: Her passion flooded over in a tidal wave. Sit down
• 2:05:54
  Speaker 1: and write that letter, or or what he sneered, or
• 2:05:59
  Speaker 1: I'll give you a whip. Like a little child, Edgar
• 2:06:02
  Speaker 1: drew close to her and merely laughed sardonically. With that.
• 2:06:06
  Speaker 1: Her hand was out and had struck his face. Edgar
• 2:06:09
  Speaker 1: gave a little outcry, and like a drowning man, with
• 2:06:13
  Speaker 1: a dull rushing in his ears and flickerings in his eyes,
• 2:06:16
  Speaker 1: he struck out blindly with both fists. He felt he
• 2:06:20
  Speaker 1: encountered something soft, a face, heard a cry. The cry
• 2:06:24
  Speaker 1: brought him to his senses. Suddenly he saw himself and
• 2:06:28
  Speaker 1: his monstrous act. He had struck his own mother. A
• 2:06:32
  Speaker 1: dreadful terror came upon him. Shame and horror. An impetuous
• 2:06:36
  Speaker 1: need to get away seized him to sink into the earth.
• 2:06:40
  Speaker 1: He wanted to fly far away, far away from those
• 2:06:43
  Speaker 1: eyes that were upon him. He made for the door,
• 2:06:46
  Speaker 1: and in an instant was gone down the stairs, through
• 2:06:49
  Speaker 1: the lobby, out on the road, away away, as though
• 2:06:53
  Speaker 1: a pack of ravening beasts were at his heels. End
• 2:06:58
  Speaker 1: of chapter twelve. Chapter thirteen of The Burning Secret by
• 2:07:07
  Speaker 1: Stefan Schwig. This LibriVox recording is in the public domain.
• 2:07:12
  Speaker 1: Chapter thirteen, Dawning Perception. After he had put a long
• 2:07:17
  Speaker 1: stretch of road between him and the hotel, Edgar stopped running.
• 2:07:22
  Speaker 1: He was panting heavily, and he had to lean against
• 2:07:24
  Speaker 1: a tree to get his breath back and recover from
• 2:07:27
  Speaker 1: the trembling of his knees. The horror of his own
• 2:07:30
  Speaker 1: deed from which he had been fleeing clutched at his
• 2:07:33
  Speaker 1: throat and shook him as with a fever. What should
• 2:07:36
  Speaker 1: he do? Now? Where should he run away to? He
• 2:07:39
  Speaker 1: was already feeling a sinking sensation of loneliness. There in
• 2:07:43
  Speaker 1: the woods, only a mile or so from the house.
• 2:07:46
  Speaker 1: Everything seemed different, unfriendlier, unkinder, now that he was alone
• 2:07:51
  Speaker 1: and helpless. The trees that only the day before had
• 2:07:54
  Speaker 1: whispered to him like brothers now gathered together darkly, as
• 2:07:58
  Speaker 1: if in threat. This solid tariness in the great unknown
• 2:08:01
  Speaker 1: world dazed the child. No, he couldn't stand alone yet,
• 2:08:06
  Speaker 1: But to whom should he go? Of his father, who
• 2:08:09
  Speaker 1: was easily excited and unapproachable, He was afraid. Besides, his
• 2:08:14
  Speaker 1: father would send him straight back to his mother, and
• 2:08:16
  Speaker 1: Edgar preferred the awfulness of the unknown, to that he
• 2:08:20
  Speaker 1: felt as though he could never look upon his mother's
• 2:08:22
  Speaker 1: face again without remembering that he had struck her with
• 2:08:25
  Speaker 1: his fist. His grandmother in Bans occurred to him. She
• 2:08:30
  Speaker 1: was so sweet and kind and had always petted him
• 2:08:32
  Speaker 1: and come to his rescue when at home he was
• 2:08:36
  Speaker 1: to be the victim of an injustice. He would stay
• 2:08:39
  Speaker 1: with her until the first storm of wrath had blown over,
• 2:08:42
  Speaker 1: and then he would write to his parents and ask
• 2:08:44
  Speaker 1: their forgiveness. In this brief quarter of an hour, he
• 2:08:47
  Speaker 1: had already been so humbled by the mere thought of
• 2:08:50
  Speaker 1: his inexperienced self standing alone in the world, that he
• 2:08:54
  Speaker 1: cursed the stupid pride that a mere stranger's lying had
• 2:08:57
  Speaker 1: put into him. He no longer wanted to be anything
• 2:09:00
  Speaker 1: but the child He had been, obedient and patient and
• 2:09:04
  Speaker 1: without the arrogance that he now felt to be excessive.
• 2:09:07
  Speaker 1: But how to reach Baines. He took out his little
• 2:09:10
  Speaker 1: pocket book and blessed his luck star that the ten
• 2:09:14
  Speaker 1: dollar gold piece given to him on his birthday was there,
• 2:09:17
  Speaker 1: safe and sound. He had never got himself to break it. Daily.
• 2:09:21
  Speaker 1: He had inspected his purse to see if it was there,
• 2:09:24
  Speaker 1: and to feast his eyes on the side of it,
• 2:09:27
  Speaker 1: and gratefully polish it with his handkerchief until it shone
• 2:09:30
  Speaker 1: like a tiny sun. But would the ten dollars be enough?
• 2:09:34
  Speaker 1: He had traveled by train many a time without thinking
• 2:09:37
  Speaker 1: that one had to pay, and still less how much
• 2:09:40
  Speaker 1: one paid, whether ten or a hundred dollars. For the
• 2:09:44
  Speaker 1: first time, he got an inkling that there were facts
• 2:09:47
  Speaker 1: in life upon which he had never reflected, and that
• 2:09:50
  Speaker 1: all the many things that surrounded him he had held
• 2:09:53
  Speaker 1: in his hands and toyed with somehow contained a value
• 2:09:56
  Speaker 1: of their own especial importance. Before he had thought he
• 2:10:01
  Speaker 1: knew everything. Now he realized he had passed by a
• 2:10:04
  Speaker 1: thousand mysteries and problems without noticing them, and was ashamed
• 2:10:09
  Speaker 1: that his poor little wisdom had stumbled over the first
• 2:10:12
  Speaker 1: step it took into life. He grew more and more discouraged,
• 2:10:16
  Speaker 1: and his footsteps lagged as he drew near the station.
• 2:10:19
  Speaker 1: How often he had dreamed of this flight from home,
• 2:10:22
  Speaker 1: of making a dash for the great life, becoming king
• 2:10:25
  Speaker 1: or emperor, soldier or poet. And now he looked timidly
• 2:10:29
  Speaker 1: at the bright little building ahead of him, and thought
• 2:10:32
  Speaker 1: of nothing but whether his ten dollars would bring him
• 2:10:35
  Speaker 1: to his grandmother. At Baines. The rails stretched away monotonously
• 2:10:39
  Speaker 1: into the country. The station was deserted. Edgar went to
• 2:10:43
  Speaker 1: the window shyly and asked, whispering so that nobody but
• 2:10:46
  Speaker 1: the ticket seller should hear how much a ticket to
• 2:10:49
  Speaker 1: Baines cost. Amused and rather astonished, eyes behind spectacles smiled
• 2:10:54
  Speaker 1: upon the timid child. Whole fair or half fair? Hole fair,
• 2:11:00
  Speaker 1: stammered Edgar utterly, without pride. Three dollars and thirty five cents,
• 2:11:06
  Speaker 1: give me a ticket, please. In great relief, Edgar shoved
• 2:11:10
  Speaker 1: the beloved bit of polished gold under the grating change
• 2:11:14
  Speaker 1: rattled on the ledge, and Edgar all at once felt
• 2:11:16
  Speaker 1: immensely wealthy, holding the strip of colored paper that guaranteed
• 2:11:21
  Speaker 1: him his liberty, and with the sound of coin clinking
• 2:11:24
  Speaker 1: in his pocket. On examining the timetable, he found there
• 2:11:28
  Speaker 1: would be a train in only twenty minutes, and he
• 2:11:30
  Speaker 1: retired to a corner to get away from the few
• 2:11:32
  Speaker 1: people idling on the platform. Though it was evident they
• 2:11:36
  Speaker 1: were harboring no suspicions, the child, as if his flight
• 2:11:40
  Speaker 1: and his crime were branded on his forehead, felt that
• 2:11:43
  Speaker 1: they were looking at nothing but him, and were wondering
• 2:11:45
  Speaker 1: why a mere boy such as he should be traveling alone.
• 2:11:49
  Speaker 1: He drew a great sigh of relief when at last
• 2:11:52
  Speaker 1: the first whistle sounded in the distance, and the rumbling
• 2:11:55
  Speaker 1: came closer and closer, and the train that was to
• 2:11:58
  Speaker 1: carry him out into the great world world puffed and
• 2:12:01
  Speaker 1: snorted into the station. It was not until Edgar took
• 2:12:04
  Speaker 1: his seat in the train that he noticed he had
• 2:12:07
  Speaker 1: secured only a third class passage, having always traveled first class.
• 2:12:12
  Speaker 1: He was again struck with a sense of difference. He
• 2:12:15
  Speaker 1: saw that there were distinctions that had escaped him. His
• 2:12:18
  Speaker 1: fellow passengers were unlike those of his first class trips.
• 2:12:22
  Speaker 1: A few Italian laborers, with tough hands and uncouth voices,
• 2:12:26
  Speaker 1: carrying pickaxes and shovels. They sat directly opposite, dull and disconsolate,
• 2:12:32
  Speaker 1: eyed staring into space. They must have been working very
• 2:12:36
  Speaker 1: hard on the road, for some of them slept in
• 2:12:38
  Speaker 1: the rattling coach, open mouthed, leaning against the hard, soiled wood.
• 2:12:43
  Speaker 1: They have been working to earn. Money came into Edgar's mind,
• 2:12:47
  Speaker 1: and he set to guessing how much they earned, but
• 2:12:49
  Speaker 1: could not decide and so another disturbing fact impressed itself
• 2:12:54
  Speaker 1: upon him, that money was something one did not always
• 2:12:57
  Speaker 1: have on hand, but had to be made somehow or other.
• 2:13:01
  Speaker 1: And for the first time he became conscious of having
• 2:13:04
  Speaker 1: taken the ease in which he had been lapped as
• 2:13:06
  Speaker 1: a matter of course, and that to the right and
• 2:13:09
  Speaker 1: the left of him abysms yawned which his eyes had
• 2:13:12
  Speaker 1: never beheld. It came to him now with the shock
• 2:13:15
  Speaker 1: of suddenness, that there were trades and professions, that his
• 2:13:19
  Speaker 1: life was hedged about by innumerable secrets, close at hand
• 2:13:22
  Speaker 1: and tangible, though he had never noticed them. Edgar was
• 2:13:27
  Speaker 1: learning a good deal in that single hour of a loneness,
• 2:13:30
  Speaker 1: and saw many things as he looked out of his
• 2:13:32
  Speaker 1: narrow compartment into the great wide world. And for all
• 2:13:36
  Speaker 1: his dark dread, something began to unfold itself gently within him,
• 2:13:41
  Speaker 1: not exactly happiness, as yet, rather a marveling at the
• 2:13:45
  Speaker 1: diversity of life He had fled. He felt out of
• 2:13:48
  Speaker 1: fear and cowardice. Yet it was his first independent act,
• 2:13:52
  Speaker 1: and he had experienced something of the reality that he
• 2:13:55
  Speaker 1: had passed by until then without heeding it. Perhaps he
• 2:13:59
  Speaker 1: himself was now as much of a mystery to his
• 2:14:02
  Speaker 1: mother and father, as the world had been to him.
• 2:14:06
  Speaker 1: It was with different eyes that he looked out of
• 2:14:08
  Speaker 1: the window. He was now viewing actualities. It seemed to
• 2:14:12
  Speaker 1: him a veil had been lifted from all things, and
• 2:14:15
  Speaker 1: they were showing him the core of their purpose, the
• 2:14:18
  Speaker 1: secret spring of their actions. Houses flew by, as though
• 2:14:21
  Speaker 1: torn away by the wind, and he pictured to himself
• 2:14:25
  Speaker 1: the people living in them. Were they rich or poor,
• 2:14:28
  Speaker 1: happy or unhappy? Were they filled with the same longing
• 2:14:32
  Speaker 1: as he to know everything? And were their children in
• 2:14:35
  Speaker 1: those houses like himself, who had merely been playing with things?
• 2:14:39
  Speaker 1: The flagmen who waved the train no longer seemed like
• 2:14:42
  Speaker 1: scattered dolls, inanimate objects, toys stationed there by, indifferent chants.
• 2:14:48
  Speaker 1: Edgar now understood that the giving of the signal was
• 2:14:50
  Speaker 1: their fate, their struggle with life. The wheels turned faster
• 2:14:55
  Speaker 1: and faster along serpentine windings. The train made its way
• 2:14:59
  Speaker 1: downwards from the uplands. The mountains took on gentler curves
• 2:15:03
  Speaker 1: and receded into the distance. The level was reached, and
• 2:15:07
  Speaker 1: Edgar gave one final glance backward. There were the mountains
• 2:15:11
  Speaker 1: like blue shadows, remote and inaccessible, and to Edgar, it
• 2:15:16
  Speaker 1: was as though his childhood were reposing up there, where
• 2:15:19
  Speaker 1: they lightly merged with the misty heavens. End of chapter thirteen,
• 2:15:31
  Speaker 1: Chapter fourteen of The Burning Secret by Stefan Sphig. This
• 2:15:36
  Speaker 1: LibriVox recording is in the public domain. Chapter fourteen, Darkness
• 2:15:41
  Speaker 1: and Confusion. When the train pulled into the station at Baines,
• 2:15:45
  Speaker 1: the street lamps were already lit, and though the station
• 2:15:49
  Speaker 1: was bright with its red and white green signals, Edgar
• 2:15:52
  Speaker 1: unexpectedly felt a dread of the approaching night. In the daytime,
• 2:15:56
  Speaker 1: he would still have been confident, people would have been
• 2:15:59
  Speaker 1: throwing the streets, and you could sit down on a
• 2:16:02
  Speaker 1: bench and rest, or look into the shop windows. But
• 2:16:06
  Speaker 1: how would he be able to stand it when the
• 2:16:08
  Speaker 1: people had all withdrawn into their homes and gone to
• 2:16:10
  Speaker 1: bed for a night's peaceful sleep. While he, conscious of wrongdoing,
• 2:16:15
  Speaker 1: wandered about alone in a strange city, just to have
• 2:16:19
  Speaker 1: a roof over his head, not to spend another moment
• 2:16:22
  Speaker 1: under the open heavens. That was his one distinct feeling.
• 2:16:26
  Speaker 1: He hurried along the familiar way without looking to right
• 2:16:30
  Speaker 1: or left, until he reached his grandmother's villa. It was
• 2:16:33
  Speaker 1: on a beautiful broad avenue, placed not free to the
• 2:16:37
  Speaker 1: gaze of passers by, but behind the vines and shrubbery
• 2:16:41
  Speaker 1: and ivy of a well kept garden, a gleam, behind
• 2:16:44
  Speaker 1: a cloud of green, a white, old fashioned, friendly house.
• 2:16:48
  Speaker 1: Edgar peeped through the iron grill like a stranger. No
• 2:16:52
  Speaker 1: sound came from within, and the windows were closed. Evidently
• 2:16:56
  Speaker 1: the family and guests were in the garden behind the house.
• 2:17:00
  Speaker 1: Edgar was about to pull the door bell when something
• 2:17:02
  Speaker 1: odd occurred. Suddenly, the thing that only a few hours
• 2:17:06
  Speaker 1: before had seemed quite natural to him had now become impossible.
• 2:17:11
  Speaker 1: How was he to go into the house, How meet
• 2:17:14
  Speaker 1: his grandmother and her family, How endure all the questions
• 2:17:18
  Speaker 1: they would besiege him with, and how answer them? How
• 2:17:21
  Speaker 1: would he be able to bear the looks they would
• 2:17:23
  Speaker 1: give him when he would tell, as he would be
• 2:17:25
  Speaker 1: obliged to, that he had run away from his mother,
• 2:17:29
  Speaker 1: And above all, how would he explain his monstrous deed,
• 2:17:33
  Speaker 1: which he himself no longer understood. A door in the
• 2:17:36
  Speaker 1: house slammed, and Edgar, in a sudden panic at being detected,
• 2:17:40
  Speaker 1: ran off. When he reached the park, he paused, it
• 2:17:44
  Speaker 1: was dark there, and he expected to find it empty,
• 2:17:47
  Speaker 1: and thought it would be a good place to sit
• 2:17:49
  Speaker 1: down in and rest and at last reflect quietly and
• 2:17:53
  Speaker 1: come to some understanding with himself about his fate. He
• 2:17:57
  Speaker 1: passed through the gateway timidly. A few lamps were burning
• 2:18:00
  Speaker 1: near the entrance, giving the young leaves on the trees
• 2:18:03
  Speaker 1: a ghostly gleam of transparent green. But deeper in the park,
• 2:18:07
  Speaker 1: down the hill, everything lay like a single black, fermenting
• 2:18:11
  Speaker 1: mass in the darkness. Edgar, eager to be alone, slipped
• 2:18:16
  Speaker 1: past the few people who were sitting in the light
• 2:18:18
  Speaker 1: of the lamps, talking or reading. But even in the
• 2:18:21
  Speaker 1: deep shadows of the unilluminated pathways, it was not quiet.
• 2:18:26
  Speaker 1: There were low whisperings that seemed to shun the light.
• 2:18:29
  Speaker 1: Sounds mingled with the rustling of the leaves, the scraping
• 2:18:32
  Speaker 1: of feet, subdued voices, all mingled with a certain voluptuous, sighing,
• 2:18:38
  Speaker 1: groaning sound that seemed to emanate from people and animals
• 2:18:42
  Speaker 1: and nature, all in a disturbed sleep. It was a
• 2:18:46
  Speaker 1: restlessness that had something foreboding in it, something sneaking, hidden, puzzling,
• 2:18:52
  Speaker 1: a sort of subterranean stirring in the wood that was
• 2:18:55
  Speaker 1: connected perhaps with nothing but the spring, yet had a
• 2:18:58
  Speaker 1: peculiarly alarming effect upon the child. He cowered into a
• 2:19:02
  Speaker 1: diminutive heap on a bench and tried to think of
• 2:19:05
  Speaker 1: what he was to say at home. But his thoughts
• 2:19:08
  Speaker 1: slipped away from him, as on a slippery surface, before
• 2:19:12
  Speaker 1: he could grasp his own ideas. And in spite of himself,
• 2:19:15
  Speaker 1: he had to keep listening and listening to the muffled tones,
• 2:19:19
  Speaker 1: the mystical voices of the darkness. How terrible the darkness was,
• 2:19:23
  Speaker 1: how bewildering, and yet how mysteriously beautiful? Were they animals
• 2:19:29
  Speaker 1: or people? Or was it merely the ghostly hand of
• 2:19:31
  Speaker 1: the wind that wove together all this rustling and crackling
• 2:19:35
  Speaker 1: and whirrying He listened. It was the wind gently moving
• 2:19:39
  Speaker 1: the tree tops. No, it wasn't. It was people. Now
• 2:19:43
  Speaker 1: he could see, distinctly, couples arm in arm, who came
• 2:19:47
  Speaker 1: up from the lighted city to enliven the darkness with
• 2:19:49
  Speaker 1: their perplexing presence. What were they after? He could not
• 2:19:54
  Speaker 1: make out. They were not talking to each other, because
• 2:19:57
  Speaker 1: he heard no voices. All he could catch which was
• 2:20:00
  Speaker 1: the sound of their tread on the gravel. And here
• 2:20:03
  Speaker 1: and there the sight of their figures, moving like shadows,
• 2:20:06
  Speaker 1: passed some clear space between the trees, always with their
• 2:20:10
  Speaker 1: arms round each other, like his mother and the baron
• 2:20:12
  Speaker 1: in the moonlight. So the great dazzling, portentous secret was
• 2:20:16
  Speaker 1: here too. Steps approached a subdued laugh. Edgar, for fear
• 2:20:22
  Speaker 1: of being discovered, drew deeper into the dark. But the
• 2:20:26
  Speaker 1: couple now groping their way in the deep gloom, had
• 2:20:29
  Speaker 1: no eyes for him. They passed him by closely locked,
• 2:20:33
  Speaker 1: and they stopped only a few feet from his bench.
• 2:20:36
  Speaker 1: They pressed their faces together. Edgar could not see clearly,
• 2:20:40
  Speaker 1: but he heard a soft groan from the woman, and
• 2:20:43
  Speaker 1: the man, stammering mad ardent words. A sort of sultry
• 2:20:47
  Speaker 1: presentiment touched Edgar's alarm with a shudder that was sensual
• 2:20:51
  Speaker 1: and pleasant. The couple stayed thus a minute or so,
• 2:20:55
  Speaker 1: and then the gravel crunched under their tread again, and
• 2:20:58
  Speaker 1: the sound of their footsteps died away in the darkness.
• 2:21:02
  Speaker 1: A tremor went through Edgar. His blood whirled hot through
• 2:21:05
  Speaker 1: his veins, and all of a sudden he felt unbearably
• 2:21:09
  Speaker 1: alone in this bewildering darkness, and the need came upon
• 2:21:12
  Speaker 1: him with elemental force for the sound of a friend's voice,
• 2:21:16
  Speaker 1: and embrace a bright roomb people he loved. The whole
• 2:21:20
  Speaker 1: perplexing darkness this night seemed to be inside his breast,
• 2:21:24
  Speaker 1: rending it. He jumped up to be at home, just
• 2:21:28
  Speaker 1: to be at home, anywhere, at home, in a warm,
• 2:21:31
  Speaker 1: bright room, in some relation with people. What could happen
• 2:21:35
  Speaker 1: to him? Then, even if they were to scold and
• 2:21:38
  Speaker 1: beat him, he would not mind all that darkness and
• 2:21:41
  Speaker 1: the dread of loneliness. Unconsciously, he made his way back
• 2:21:45
  Speaker 1: to grandmother's villa and found himself standing with the cool
• 2:21:49
  Speaker 1: door bell in his hand. Again. Now he observed the
• 2:21:52
  Speaker 1: lighted windows were shining through the foliage, and he pictured
• 2:21:56
  Speaker 1: each room belonging to each window, and the people inside.
• 2:22:00
  Speaker 1: This very proximity to familiar beings, the comforting sense of
• 2:22:04
  Speaker 1: being near people whom he knew loved him was delightful,
• 2:22:08
  Speaker 1: and if he hesitated, it was simply to taste this
• 2:22:11
  Speaker 1: joy a little longer. Suddenly, a terrified voice behind him shrieked, Edgar,
• 2:22:18
  Speaker 1: why here he is? It was his grandmother's maid. She
• 2:22:22
  Speaker 1: pounced on him and grabbed his hand. The door was
• 2:22:25
  Speaker 1: pulled open from within. A dog jumped at Edgar barking.
• 2:22:29
  Speaker 1: People came running, and voices of mingled, alarm and joy
• 2:22:33
  Speaker 1: called out. The first to meet Edgar was his grandmother,
• 2:22:36
  Speaker 1: with outstretched arms, and behind her. He thought he must
• 2:22:40
  Speaker 1: be dreaming his mother. Tears came to Edgar's eyes, and
• 2:22:46
  Speaker 1: he stood amid this ardent outburst of emotions, quivering and intimidated,
• 2:22:50
  Speaker 1: undecided what to say or do, and very uncertain of
• 2:22:54
  Speaker 1: his own feelings. He was not sure whether he was
• 2:22:57
  Speaker 1: glad or frightened. End of chapter fourteen, Chapter fifteen of
• 2:23:09
  Speaker 1: The Burning Secret by Stefan Schweig. This LibriVox recording is
• 2:23:13
  Speaker 1: in the public domain. Chapter fifteen, the Last Dream. They
• 2:23:20
  Speaker 1: had been looking for him in bains for some time.
• 2:23:22
  Speaker 1: His mother, in spite of her anger, had been alarmed
• 2:23:25
  Speaker 1: when he did not return, and had had search made
• 2:23:28
  Speaker 1: for him all over summering. The whole place was aroused,
• 2:23:32
  Speaker 1: and people were making every sort of dreadful conjecture. When
• 2:23:36
  Speaker 1: a man brought the news that he had seen the
• 2:23:38
  Speaker 1: child at the ticket office. Inquiry at the railroad station,
• 2:23:42
  Speaker 1: of course, brought out that Edgar had bought a ticket
• 2:23:44
  Speaker 1: to Baines, and his mother, without hesitation, took the very
• 2:23:48
  Speaker 1: next train after him, telegraphing first to his father and
• 2:23:52
  Speaker 1: to his grandmother. The family held on to Edgar, but
• 2:23:56
  Speaker 1: not forcibly. On the contrary, they led him with an
• 2:23:59
  Speaker 1: air of suppressed triumph into the front room. And how
• 2:24:03
  Speaker 1: odd it was that he did not mind their reproaches,
• 2:24:06
  Speaker 1: because he saw happiness and love in their eyes, and
• 2:24:10
  Speaker 1: even their assumed anger lasted only a second or two.
• 2:24:14
  Speaker 1: His grandmother was embracing him again tearfully. No one spoke
• 2:24:18
  Speaker 1: of his bad conduct, and he felt the wondrousness of
• 2:24:21
  Speaker 1: the protection surrounding him. The maid took off his coat
• 2:24:25
  Speaker 1: and brought him a warmer one, and his grandmother asked
• 2:24:28
  Speaker 1: if he did not want something to eat. They pestered
• 2:24:31
  Speaker 1: him with their inquiries and their tenderness, but stopped questioning
• 2:24:35
  Speaker 1: him when they noticed how embarrassed he was. He experienced
• 2:24:39
  Speaker 1: deliciously the sensation that he had so despised before, of
• 2:24:44
  Speaker 1: being wholly a child, and he was ashamed of his
• 2:24:47
  Speaker 1: arrogance of the last few days, when he had wanted
• 2:24:50
  Speaker 1: to dispense with it all and exchange it for the
• 2:24:52
  Speaker 1: deceptive joy of solitariness. The telephone rang in the next room.
• 2:24:57
  Speaker 1: He heard his mother's voice in snatches. Edgar back got
• 2:25:02
  Speaker 1: here last train, and he marveled that she had not
• 2:25:05
  Speaker 1: flown at him in a passion. She had put her
• 2:25:08
  Speaker 1: arms around him, with a peculiarly constrained expression in her eyes.
• 2:25:13
  Speaker 1: He began to regret his conduct more and more, and
• 2:25:16
  Speaker 1: he would have liked to extricate himself from his grandmother's
• 2:25:20
  Speaker 1: and aunt's tenderness, to run to his mother and beg
• 2:25:23
  Speaker 1: her pardon, and tell her by herself, oh so humbly,
• 2:25:27
  Speaker 1: that he wanted to be a child again and obey her.
• 2:25:30
  Speaker 1: But when he rose with a perfectly gentle movement, his
• 2:25:33
  Speaker 1: grandmother asked in alarm where he was going. He felt ashamed.
• 2:25:38
  Speaker 1: If he made a single step, it frightened them. He
• 2:25:41
  Speaker 1: had frightened them all terribly, and they were afraid he
• 2:25:44
  Speaker 1: was going to run away again. How could he make
• 2:25:47
  Speaker 1: them understand that nobody regretted his flight more than he did.
• 2:25:52
  Speaker 1: The table was set, supper had been prepared for him hurriedly.
• 2:25:56
  Speaker 1: His grandmother sat beside him, without removing her eyes from him.
• 2:26:00
  Speaker 1: She and his aunt and the maid held him fast
• 2:26:03
  Speaker 1: in a quiet circle, the warmth of which calmed him wonderfully,
• 2:26:07
  Speaker 1: And the only disturbing thought was that of his mother's
• 2:26:10
  Speaker 1: absence from the room. If only she could have guessed
• 2:26:13
  Speaker 1: how humble he was, she would certainly have come in.
• 2:26:17
  Speaker 1: From outside. Came the sound of a cab drawing up
• 2:26:19
  Speaker 1: at the door. Every one gave a start, so that
• 2:26:23
  Speaker 1: Edgar also was upset. His grandmother went out, he could
• 2:26:27
  Speaker 1: hear loud voices in the hall, and then it struck
• 2:26:30
  Speaker 1: him it must be his father who had arrived. He
• 2:26:33
  Speaker 1: observed timidly that he had been left alone in the room.
• 2:26:36
  Speaker 1: To be alone, even for those few moments made him nervous.
• 2:26:40
  Speaker 1: His father was a stern man. He was the one
• 2:26:43
  Speaker 1: person Edgar really feared. He listened. His father seemed to
• 2:26:48
  Speaker 1: be excited. His voice was loud and expressed annoyance. Every
• 2:26:52
  Speaker 1: Now and then came his grandmother's and his mother's voices
• 2:26:55
  Speaker 1: in mollifying tones, in attempts, evidently to make him adopt
• 2:27:00
  Speaker 1: to milder attitude. But his father's voice remained hard, hard
• 2:27:04
  Speaker 1: as his foot treads, now coming nearer and nearer, and
• 2:27:07
  Speaker 1: now stopping short at the door, which was next pulled
• 2:27:11
  Speaker 1: violently open. The boy's father was a large man, and
• 2:27:15
  Speaker 1: Edgar felt so very, very thin. Beside him as he
• 2:27:18
  Speaker 1: entered the room. Nervous and genuinely angry. It seemed, what
• 2:27:23
  Speaker 1: got into your head to run away? How could you
• 2:27:26
  Speaker 1: give your mother such a fright? His voice was wrathful,
• 2:27:29
  Speaker 1: and his hands made a wild movement. Edgar's mother came
• 2:27:33
  Speaker 1: in and stood behind her husband, her face in shadow.
• 2:27:37
  Speaker 1: Edgar made no reply. He felt he had to justify himself.
• 2:27:41
  Speaker 1: But how to tell the story of the way they
• 2:27:43
  Speaker 1: had lied to him and how his mother had slapped him?
• 2:27:46
  Speaker 1: Would his father understand, Well, where's your tongue? What was
• 2:27:51
  Speaker 1: the matter? You may tell me. You needn't be afraid.
• 2:27:54
  Speaker 1: You must have had some good reason for running away.
• 2:27:57
  Speaker 1: Did any one do anything to you? Edgar hesitated at
• 2:28:02
  Speaker 1: the recollection of the events in summering. His anger began
• 2:28:05
  Speaker 1: to flare up again, and he was about to bring
• 2:28:07
  Speaker 1: his charge against his mother when he saw, his heart
• 2:28:11
  Speaker 1: stood still, that she was making an odd gesture behind
• 2:28:15
  Speaker 1: his father's back. At first, he did not comprehend, but
• 2:28:19
  Speaker 1: he kept his eyes fixed on her and noticed that
• 2:28:22
  Speaker 1: the expression of her face was beseeching. Then, very very softly,
• 2:28:27
  Speaker 1: she lifted her finger to her mouth in sign that
• 2:28:29
  Speaker 1: he should keep everything to himself. The child was conscious
• 2:28:34
  Speaker 1: of a great wild joy pouring in a warm wave
• 2:28:36
  Speaker 1: over his whole body. He knew she was giving him
• 2:28:39
  Speaker 1: the secret to guard, and that a human destiny was
• 2:28:42
  Speaker 1: hanging in the balance on his child's lips. Filled with
• 2:28:46
  Speaker 1: a jubilant pride that she had reposed confidence in him,
• 2:28:50
  Speaker 1: he suddenly became possessed by a desire for self sacrifice.
• 2:28:54
  Speaker 1: He magnified his own wrong doing in order to show
• 2:28:57
  Speaker 1: how much of a man he had grown to be.
• 2:29:00
  Speaker 1: Collecting his wits, he said, no, no, there was no
• 2:29:04
  Speaker 1: good reason for my running away. Mamma was very kind
• 2:29:08
  Speaker 1: to me, but I didn't behave myself, and I was ashamed,
• 2:29:11
  Speaker 1: and so and so I ran away. The father looked
• 2:29:15
  Speaker 1: at his son in amazement. Such a confession was the
• 2:29:19
  Speaker 1: last thing he expected to hear. His wrath was disarmed. Well,
• 2:29:24
  Speaker 1: if you're sorry, then it's all right, and we won't
• 2:29:27
  Speaker 1: say any more about it to day. You'll be careful
• 2:29:30
  Speaker 1: in the future, though, not to do anything of the
• 2:29:32
  Speaker 1: sort again. He paused and looked at Edgar, and his
• 2:29:35
  Speaker 1: voice was milder as he went on, how pale you are, boy,
• 2:29:40
  Speaker 1: but I believe you've grown taller in this short while.
• 2:29:43
  Speaker 1: I hope you won't be guilty of such childish behavior again,
• 2:29:47
  Speaker 1: because really you're not a child any more, and you
• 2:29:50
  Speaker 1: ought to be sensible. Edgar the whole time had kept
• 2:29:54
  Speaker 1: looking at his mother. Something peculiar seemed to be glowing
• 2:29:58
  Speaker 1: in her eyes. Or was it the reflection of the light, No,
• 2:30:02
  Speaker 1: it was something new. Her eyes were moist, and there
• 2:30:05
  Speaker 1: was a smile on her lips that said thank you
• 2:30:08
  Speaker 1: to him. They sent him to bed, but he was
• 2:30:11
  Speaker 1: not now distressed at being left alone. He had such
• 2:30:15
  Speaker 1: a wealth of things to think over all. The agony
• 2:30:18
  Speaker 1: of the past days was dissipated by the tremendous sense
• 2:30:21
  Speaker 1: of his first experience of life. He felt happy in
• 2:30:25
  Speaker 1: a mysterious presentiment of future experiences. Outside, the trees were
• 2:30:30
  Speaker 1: rustling in the gloomy night, but he was not scared.
• 2:30:33
  Speaker 1: He had lost all impatience at having to wait for life,
• 2:30:37
  Speaker 1: now that he knew how rich it was. For the
• 2:30:39
  Speaker 1: first time that day, it seemed to him he had
• 2:30:42
  Speaker 1: seen life naked, no longer veiled behind the thousand lies
• 2:30:46
  Speaker 1: of childhood. He saw it in its complete, fearful, voluptuous beauty.
• 2:30:52
  Speaker 1: Never had he supposed that days could be crowded, so
• 2:30:54
  Speaker 1: full of transitions from sorrow to joy and back again,
• 2:30:58
  Speaker 1: and it made him happy to think there were many
• 2:31:01
  Speaker 1: more such days in store for him, and that a
• 2:31:03
  Speaker 1: whole life was waiting to reveal its mystery to him.
• 2:31:07
  Speaker 1: The first inkling had come to him of the diversity
• 2:31:10
  Speaker 1: of life. For the first time, he thought he understood
• 2:31:13
  Speaker 1: men's beings, that they heeded each other when they seemed
• 2:31:17
  Speaker 1: to be inimical, and that it was very sweet to
• 2:31:20
  Speaker 1: be loved by them. He was incapable of thinking of
• 2:31:24
  Speaker 1: anything or anybody with hate. He regretted nothing, and had
• 2:31:27
  Speaker 1: a sense of gratitude even to the Baron, his bitterest enemy,
• 2:31:31
  Speaker 1: because it was he who had opened the door for
• 2:31:34
  Speaker 1: him to this world of dawning emotions. It was very
• 2:31:38
  Speaker 1: sweet to be lying in the dark, thinking thoughts that
• 2:31:40
  Speaker 1: were mingled vaguely with dreams, and relapsing almost into sleep.
• 2:31:46
  Speaker 1: Was it a dream? Or did Edgar really hear the
• 2:31:48
  Speaker 1: door open and some one creep softly into his room.
• 2:31:52
  Speaker 1: He was too sleepy to open his eyes and look.
• 2:31:55
  Speaker 1: Then he felt a breath upon his face, and the
• 2:31:58
  Speaker 1: touch of another face, soft and warm and gentle against his,
• 2:32:03
  Speaker 1: and he knew it was his mother who was kissing
• 2:32:05
  Speaker 1: him and stroking his hair. He felt her kisses and
• 2:32:08
  Speaker 1: her tears, and responded to her caresses. He took them
• 2:32:12
  Speaker 1: as reconciliation and gratitude for his silence. It was not
• 2:32:17
  Speaker 1: until many years later that he really understood these silent
• 2:32:20
  Speaker 1: tears and knew they were a vow of this woman,
• 2:32:23
  Speaker 1: verging on middle age, to dedicate herself henceforth to her
• 2:32:27
  Speaker 1: child and renounce adventure and desire on her own behalf.
• 2:32:32
  Speaker 1: They were a farewell. He did not know that she
• 2:32:35
  Speaker 1: was thanking him for more than his silence. She was
• 2:32:38
  Speaker 1: grateful that he had rescued her from a barren experience,
• 2:32:42
  Speaker 1: and in these caresses was bequeathing him the bitter, sweet
• 2:32:45
  Speaker 1: legacy of her love for his future life. Nothing of
• 2:32:49
  Speaker 1: all this did the child lying there comprehend, but he
• 2:32:52
  Speaker 1: felt it was blissful to be so loved, and that
• 2:32:55
  Speaker 1: by this love he was already entangled in the great
• 2:32:58
  Speaker 1: secret of the world. When she had withdrawn her hand
• 2:33:02
  Speaker 1: from his head and her lips from his lips, and
• 2:33:05
  Speaker 1: with a light swish of her skirts, had left the room,
• 2:33:08
  Speaker 1: something warm remained behind, a breath upon Edgar's mouth, and
• 2:33:13
  Speaker 1: a seductive longing came upon him to feel such soft
• 2:33:16
  Speaker 1: lips upon his and be so tenderly embraced often and
• 2:33:20
  Speaker 1: often again. But this divination of the great secret so
• 2:33:24
  Speaker 1: longed for was already clouded over by sleep. Once again,
• 2:33:29
  Speaker 1: all the happenings of the past hours flitted through Edgar's mind.
• 2:33:33
  Speaker 1: Once again, the leaves in the book of his childhood
• 2:33:36
  Speaker 1: were turned alluringly. Then the child fell asleep, and the
• 2:33:40
  Speaker 1: profounder dream of his life began. End of Chapter fifteen,
• 2:33:47
  Speaker 1: end of The Burning Secret by Stefan Schweig, read by
• 2:33:52
  Speaker 1: Lee Smalley,