Latest / The Bridges and Beacons Podcast / Leading with Curiosity and Joy with Scott Holmes

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Leading with Curiosity and Joy with Scott Holmes · The Bridges and Beacons Podcast

0:38
SPEAKER_02: Hello, hello, hello, and welcome to the Bridges and Beacons Podcast.
0:43
SPEAKER_02: I'm your host, Kelly Meyerson, and today I'm joined by a former guest and good friend slash co-author, Scott Holmes.
0:52
SPEAKER_02: Welcome, Scott.
0:53
SPEAKER_00: Hey there.
0:54
SPEAKER_00: Thank you very much, Kelly.
0:56
SPEAKER_02: I'm so excited to have you here.
0:58
SPEAKER_02: And I just want to share a little bit about you with the listener before we get into our conversation.
1:04
SPEAKER_02: But listener, I'm going to ask you while I'm reading Scott's bio, I want you to get yourself a cozy beverage, something to write with.
1:14
SPEAKER_02: I have a feeling, and my feelings are usually pretty good, that you're going to learn some strategies, tools, or have a little bit of an aha moment.
1:24
SPEAKER_02: So I think having that notebook with you, if possible, if you're driving, please don't write and drive.
1:28
SPEAKER_02: We don't, we don't believe in that.
1:30
SPEAKER_02: That's unsafe.
1:31
SPEAKER_02: But if you can, grab yourself a beverage, grab yourself a pen and a piece of paper or your favorite journal, get cozy, and let's get ready to hear about Scott.
1:41
SPEAKER_02: He's an intuitive energy healer, author, speaker, and leader, bringing stories, understanding, and perspective to the world through one-on-one group and virtual settings.
1:52
SPEAKER_02: Thanks again for being here, Scott.
1:54
SPEAKER_00: It's certainly my pleasure and wonderful to be back on your program.
1:58
SPEAKER_02: Thank you.
1:59
SPEAKER_02: Yes.
2:00
SPEAKER_02: I will link your first episode in the show notes for the listener in case they want to go back and hear our perspective.
2:08
SPEAKER_02: It was probably a couple of years ago, Scott.
2:10
SPEAKER_02: It was two years ago, yeah.
2:12
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
2:12
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
2:12
SPEAKER_02: So it's been a little while since you were on the show.
2:16
SPEAKER_02: It was still Mystic Nerds Quad podcasts at that time.
2:19
SPEAKER_02: We're still Mystic Nerds.
2:21
SPEAKER_02: Like that has not gone away.
2:23
SPEAKER_02: But as we were talking about, I think timing is everything.
2:28
SPEAKER_02: Um I'm sure, like me, you're feeling the importance of this time in human history for being on the side of serving humanity, caring for people, and creating a future world that is more inclusive, loving, healing, et cetera.
2:49
SPEAKER_02: So I think this conversation is so important.
2:54
SPEAKER_02: There are many things that we could talk about.
2:56
SPEAKER_02: But when I took a look at your sign up for the podcast, and I saw two words, actually, three words, I'll say, that that I got very excited about.
3:07
SPEAKER_02: So leading with curiosity and joy.
3:10
SPEAKER_02: Leadership, yes.
3:12
SPEAKER_02: Curiosity, one of my highest values and joy.
3:16
SPEAKER_02: And I think those three words are so crucial right now.
3:22
SPEAKER_02: And for a listener who may be feeling a bit disempowered at this moment in time, I think we're gonna have some advice for them to find some joy and some curiosity because those things are what will serve us right now if we're experiencing frustration, grief, burnout.
3:49
SPEAKER_02: And so I'm gonna pass it over to you.
3:53
SPEAKER_02: And I want to hear from you why talk about leading with curiosity and joy right now?
4:00
SPEAKER_02: What is so important for you about those two qualities?
4:06
SPEAKER_00: Well, thank you for asking.
4:08
SPEAKER_00: The curiosity, I think, is the second most powerful magic that there is after love.
4:17
SPEAKER_00: Why?
4:19
SPEAKER_00: When we're younger and we're learning, curiosity is an everyday event.
4:26
SPEAKER_00: When you're let's you look at a baby and they start looking at their hands and they see their hands for the first time and they don't know, well, what are these things?
4:35
SPEAKER_00: Every day when we're growing up, when we're going to school, when we're doing that, all the way through till till 18, 19, 20, we are curious when we meet people.
4:46
SPEAKER_00: Can they be a friend?
4:47
SPEAKER_00: Wait a minute.
4:48
SPEAKER_00: Can how can I do that?
4:50
SPEAKER_00: What school am I going to go to?
4:51
SPEAKER_00: What are we really interested in?
4:53
SPEAKER_00: All of those questions.
4:54
SPEAKER_00: We get into adult life, and all of a sudden, curiosity kind of stops.
5:00
SPEAKER_00: You have children, you have a job, you have all of the chores, you have the responsibilities, and the way to all those kind of dampens curiosity.
5:09
SPEAKER_00: And I and I and it happened to me also throughout my adult life.
5:15
SPEAKER_00: That curiosity about things kind of dampened.
5:18
SPEAKER_00: I didn't have time.
5:19
SPEAKER_00: We had talked about doing a deep dive on things that make that you're interested in, and not having the time to do it, not having you know having too many responsibilities, making sure that everything happened for everybody else in it we're connected to in our lives, didn't allow for that kind of same curiosity.
5:37
SPEAKER_00: And I found that with that lack of curiosity, joy diminishes.
5:44
SPEAKER_00: Now the difference between happiness and joy therein lies how and how we define it.
5:50
SPEAKER_00: Happiness, everybody gets happiness.
5:53
SPEAKER_00: There are very there are brief moments.
5:55
SPEAKER_00: Something makes you happy.
5:57
SPEAKER_00: Someone gives you a gift and and you you're you're thankful.
6:01
SPEAKER_00: And I think happiness is momentary.
6:06
SPEAKER_00: Joy is long term.
6:09
SPEAKER_00: If you find joy, and you're one of those people that finds joy in everything you do, in everything, and it shows you have the most beatific smile, you have this incredible energy, and in in doing this podcast, you you have joy, you've it it emanates from you.
6:26
SPEAKER_00: Joy is long term.
6:28
SPEAKER_00: And I find that to get to joy you have to start with gratitude first, as a base, and joy follows.
6:38
SPEAKER_00: And that if we walk through life with that glow of joy of being here and wanting to be here, and knowing we were meant to be here, and knowing we're we're meant to do, joy just comes out.
6:56
SPEAKER_00: And I know that I'd rather be around people who are really kind of happy and joyful and have a very positive outlook in life rather than not.
7:08
SPEAKER_02: I think that's so that's that's such a good thought because I think sometimes when we fall out of that that habit of gratitude and and finding joy and choosing things that make us joyful because we get so pulled into the things that we're, you know, quote unquote supposed to be doing, yeah, it really doesn't feel very good in our bodies.
7:36
SPEAKER_02: And I think it's interesting, and and we were talking a little bit about human design before we started recording.
7:43
SPEAKER_02: And for generators, the the sort of the indicators of alignment, you know, those those themes are satisfaction, and then out of alignment is frustration.
7:58
SPEAKER_02: And if you're a manifesting generator, like you and I both are, you also have themes of feeling either at peace or angry.
8:11
SPEAKER_02: So you can kind of see how when we get into those states of feeling off or frustrated or upset, disappointed, it's not necessarily a moral failing, which I think is how I grew up believing like if I couldn't hold a positive outlook all the time, and listen, toxic positivity is real, right?
8:38
SPEAKER_02: So we're not talking about pretending like everything is okay when it's clearly not.
8:45
SPEAKER_02: And there's a whole lot that wraps into that people pleasing and so on and so forth.
8:51
SPEAKER_02: But we can choose to shift out of those unresourceful states of being, I'll say.
9:01
SPEAKER_02: I think feelings deserve to be felt and experienced and processed how we need to, but more so when we see that we're not experiencing curiosity and joy and we have that awareness, how do we shift from that?
9:19
SPEAKER_02: So, like let's say, for example, we're we're working in a job and we're feeling more frustrated by the job or angry or bitter, you know, some of those low emotional states from human design perspective, depending on your design.
9:37
SPEAKER_02: What what do we do?
9:39
SPEAKER_02: How do we find joy in those moments?
9:42
SPEAKER_00: And that's where and and burnout is one of those things that have come out quite a bit, especially with the nature of how things have changed so rapidly in the world around us, not only in our country, but all over the world.
9:57
SPEAKER_00: And it's perspective.
10:00
SPEAKER_01: Okay.
10:02
SPEAKER_00: Perspective.
10:04
SPEAKER_00: And I've I've always contended that we change best in micro changes, micro, just that one turn of the screen of that dial.
10:17
SPEAKER_00: Not the big changes, because what happens when we do big changes, everything snaps back to where it was.
10:23
SPEAKER_00: Right?
10:24
SPEAKER_00: It just kind of snapped.
10:27
SPEAKER_00: But when we do micro changes, when we do those things, they stay with us.
10:30
unknown: Okay.
10:30
SPEAKER_00: And how do you change perspectives?
10:35
SPEAKER_00: The the things that you I know that you come up with with especially with your clients, is about boundaries.
10:42
SPEAKER_00: First of all, with ourselves.
10:44
SPEAKER_00: You know, I was, I'm a I'm not cured, but I am a people pleaser, first lesson always.
10:51
SPEAKER_00: I I I look outside of myself first.
10:54
SPEAKER_00: I always put myself in harm's way, and it I always put my cape on, tied it, and I flew off to save whoever needed help.
11:03
SPEAKER_00: Didn't matter what was going on in my life or what was important to me, I did that for other people because that was is what I was told I should do in my life.
11:11
SPEAKER_00: That's what I was always conditioned to do.
11:14
SPEAKER_00: And what happened is my life was uh ended up being very chaotic, and I would get very frustrated, as you had said, very frustrated, and I'd get angry at times.
11:23
SPEAKER_00: Why can't I just and then the next time that thought would come up, and then the next time somebody would call and say, Hey, I need help.
11:31
SPEAKER_00: Yep, okay, here we go, and off I'd go.
11:33
SPEAKER_00: And there was no time for me.
11:35
SPEAKER_00: So just taking that one small step of saying somebody called up and say, Hey, can you I would take a breath.
11:46
SPEAKER_00: I find I I find breath is just really effective way to deal with a lot of things, but but instead of reacting to it and the automatic that used to come up, I would take a breath before I answered.
12:00
SPEAKER_00: And all of a sudden, my brain had a chance to kick in.
12:08
SPEAKER_00: That you've already committed to.
12:12
SPEAKER_00: Well, I can help you tomorrow, but I can't help you now.
12:17
SPEAKER_00: And just and it it was my way when I did that of not telling them no, telling them yes, I can do it, but this is what I can give you.
12:27
SPEAKER_00: And it was that those self-boundaries that that and how we condition people how to treat us.
12:36
SPEAKER_00: And I finally did I did that with my daughters all their lives through their 20s.
12:40
SPEAKER_00: You know, my wife and I were always there.
12:41
SPEAKER_00: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
12:43
SPEAKER_00: All of a sudden I started saying, Well, let's see.
12:49
SPEAKER_00: I'll talk to you tomorrow about it.
12:50
SPEAKER_00: And all of a sudden, they found an amazingly found a way to solve their problem without me there.
12:57
SPEAKER_00: So it allowed that no allowed them to find their way, but also to free me of that necessity to constantly help people.
13:09
SPEAKER_00: So burnout, we take on those responsibilities, right?
13:12
SPEAKER_00: When we talk about burnout with work, we take on, take on, take on, and it just builds and builds and builds.
13:19
SPEAKER_00: And now work takes over our life, and it becomes have you if you've any of those out there, if you've ever, and I it used to happen to me, I would wake up of eight hours of sleep and felt like I worked for eight hours because my mind never shut off.
13:36
SPEAKER_00: My mind, my mind kept trying to solve problems that I was trying to resolve the course of the day, and you would wake up and you would feel like you worked eight hours or other than split.
13:46
SPEAKER_00: So so burnout perpetuates itself, that that sense of it.
13:51
SPEAKER_00: So so again, breath in the morning.
13:55
SPEAKER_00: What I found waking up, taking that breath, and feeling into the gratitude, feeling into my body.
14:04
SPEAKER_00: Just feeling it, hey, what's what's hurting today?
14:07
SPEAKER_00: What's you know, how's my how are my knees?
14:10
SPEAKER_00: How's my back bend?
14:11
SPEAKER_00: How just feeling into my body and getting into my body, and then being saying my gratitudes.
14:17
SPEAKER_00: Gratitude, by the way, saved me at a very tough time in my life because it someone said, Tell me three things you're grateful for.
14:26
SPEAKER_00: And in that moment in my life, I could not think of one.
14:29
SPEAKER_00: And it was, and I realized how sad that was that I couldn't feel gratitude for it.
14:35
SPEAKER_00: And so it came very slowly.
14:37
SPEAKER_00: But now, if you ask me what I'm grateful for, I have a list about 25 pages long that I will tell you that I am grateful for and things I get to do, not have to do, but I get to do.
14:50
SPEAKER_00: Because most of what we have to do is self-imposed.
14:54
SPEAKER_02: Yep.
14:55
SPEAKER_02: No, it absolutely is.
14:58
SPEAKER_00: Because we've made decisions.
14:59
SPEAKER_00: Okay, I'm going to take this job, but with this job comes all of these decisions I have to make and all this time I have to put in.
15:04
SPEAKER_00: It's the decisions of what I want to do.
15:06
SPEAKER_00: Okay, this is what I have to do during the course of the day.
15:09
SPEAKER_00: Does everything really have to does the drugstore and the dry cleaner and the shopping and have to be done today, right now?
15:17
SPEAKER_00: Or can it be done in a in a much easier way?
15:22
unknown: Yeah.
15:22
SPEAKER_00: So those small, those small micro clicks change your perspective even just a little bit.
15:29
SPEAKER_00: And it broadens the time that you have for within you, the broadens the boundaries that you have for yourself that you've imposed self-impose, but also outside yourself.
15:39
SPEAKER_00: And then curiosity kicks in.
15:43
SPEAKER_00: I have this hour that I've made for myself on Saturday morning at nine o'clock.
15:49
SPEAKER_00: What can I do with that?
15:52
SPEAKER_00: Hmm.
15:53
SPEAKER_00: You know, I've had this project that I've trying to been trying to get done for the last year and a half.
15:59
SPEAKER_00: Let me put an hour into that.
16:02
SPEAKER_00: Now all of a sudden there's progress.
16:04
SPEAKER_00: There's a little bit of change.
16:05
SPEAKER_00: And you see within yourself the ability to make that time for those things that are more important for you and that resonate with you.
16:16
SPEAKER_00: You talk about alignment all the time.
16:19
SPEAKER_00: And I the more the older I get, the more I do, the more aligned I am with what I want to do.
16:27
SPEAKER_00: This year, and Egypt was last minute.
16:30
SPEAKER_00: I just signed on with that with a friend who's going to Egypt in April.
16:35
SPEAKER_00: And I'm going to Australia in August.
16:39
SPEAKER_00: That's a year, year-long commitment.
16:41
SPEAKER_00: Very expensive.
16:42
SPEAKER_00: Going from Boston to Australia, 24-hour flight, spending two weeks there and then coming back.
16:48
SPEAKER_00: It is a commitment, but the adventure.
16:54
SPEAKER_00: Not being there.
16:55
SPEAKER_00: Oh I don't know about any of you, but that was always been on my bucket list, Australia.
17:00
SPEAKER_00: It was always felt so unusual.
17:03
SPEAKER_00: It always felt so foreign.
17:06
SPEAKER_00: I've met a number of people from Australia, and I love their attitude.
17:09
SPEAKER_00: They have such a joy of life.
17:12
SPEAKER_00: And it's that joy that they bring to everything that they do, and they love what they're doing.
17:18
SPEAKER_00: I want more of that in my life.
17:20
SPEAKER_00: I try to surround myself with people who are there, who have that, who have found that within themselves, that they can be happy about where they are.
17:30
SPEAKER_00: Is their life perfect?
17:32
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely not.
17:35
SPEAKER_00: Everyone that you meet has something going on in their life that is troubling them or is has been traumatic, or they're trying to get over, or the you know, the responsibilities of either parents that are getting older or kids that are going through college or a spouse that's ill.
17:53
SPEAKER_00: All of these aspects, everybody is going through all of those, and just having the compassion when you deal with them to know that they got stuff going on, as we all do, that that lends itself to holding the holding space for them to be able to come out and be who they are.
18:14
SPEAKER_02: Yeah.
18:15
SPEAKER_02: I I love all that, Scott.
18:17
SPEAKER_02: And I'm gonna I'm gonna take us back through some of those gens and just highlight some of what you've said here.
18:23
SPEAKER_02: So you started out by talking about the shift of perspective.
18:28
SPEAKER_02: And I think that that is something that can be really difficult if we're sort of in that space.
18:36
SPEAKER_02: And I I agree with you that breath is such a great way to access perspective and creativity and curiosity, like you talked about.
18:45
SPEAKER_02: The other thing you talked about was boundaries.
18:47
SPEAKER_02: And I just wanted to geek out for a second on your human design because I think it will it will kind of highlight some of what you talked about.
18:56
SPEAKER_02: So you're an emotional manifesting generator.
19:00
SPEAKER_02: And so when you have emotional definition, which means your emotional solar plexus is defined, the way that you make decisions is better if you allow that emotional wave to occur before you commit to something.
19:17
SPEAKER_02: So you're you experience the full range of emotions, the highs and the lows, and where you are in your emotional wave can impact how you make a decision.
19:32
SPEAKER_02: So if you're in an emotional high and somebody says, let's go out to dinner at eight o'clock on Friday night, you're like, yeah, let's do it.
19:40
SPEAKER_02: But then maybe on Thursday morning you're in an emotional low and you're like, that feels like a terrible idea.
19:46
SPEAKER_02: And then maybe, you know, somewhere around Friday afternoon, you're sort of in a neutral and you're like, you know what, I'm a little tired and spent from this week.
19:55
SPEAKER_02: Going out to dinner at eight o'clock on a Friday night is not going to be an alignment for me.
19:59
SPEAKER_02: It's a no.
20:00
SPEAKER_02: But you see how kind of as we go up and down, whether it's actually an alignment for us is going to potentially shift.
20:10
SPEAKER_02: And so we want to feel it in the highs, the lows, and then make decisions from a very stable place.
20:17
SPEAKER_02: So taking that extra time is so important.
20:20
SPEAKER_02: Does that resonate with you?
20:21
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
20:23
SPEAKER_00: And the and to add to that point, what I found is depending on where you are and and and how you're what vibration you're in, you can have highs and lows that go from here to here, or you can have highs and lows that go from there to there.
20:39
SPEAKER_00: And for me, when when I'm stable and and my vibration is is constant, when it's in this, there is not a whole, you still feel them, but they don't overwhelm.
20:51
SPEAKER_00: They don't, they don't, you know, it's not so it's not the roller coaster.
20:55
SPEAKER_00: You don't get sick to your stomach because of all the highs and the lows.
20:58
SPEAKER_00: It evens out, and it's more of this.
21:03
SPEAKER_00: And that's when I feel, and we've talked about this before, about being in flow.
21:08
SPEAKER_02: Mm-hmm.
21:09
SPEAKER_02: Agreed.
21:10
SPEAKER_02: Totally agree.
21:11
SPEAKER_02: The other thing I want to geek out on is you have an open head and root, as do I, which can create a lot of pressure because, in your head, if your head is open, it's pressure to be certain and to know.
21:27
SPEAKER_02: And certainty, you're literally open-minded.
21:30
SPEAKER_02: So certainty isn't something that is going to happen for you.
21:35
SPEAKER_02: And your your root is where you feel that sense of like a very steady rhythm and timing, divine timing.
21:44
SPEAKER_02: And if it's open, you don't really feel that.
21:46
SPEAKER_02: So you sort of always feel the pressure to do.
21:48
SPEAKER_02: So you're you're sort of ever scanning the world for like, I need to be sure and I need to do.
21:57
SPEAKER_02: And you have the energy for it.
22:00
SPEAKER_02: And you do have your defined ajna, which gives you a lot of potential and possibility, which is connected very deeply into your throat.
22:10
SPEAKER_02: So if you haven't given yourself that time, your your ajna and your throat go to work for you.
22:17
SPEAKER_02: Figuring it out, solving problems, probably a very easy thing for you to do, but not necessarily resourceful, which is where I think your talk about boundaries becomes so valuable.
22:32
SPEAKER_02: I did not realize what boundaries really were.
22:37
SPEAKER_02: And until I didn't have them and burned out.
22:41
SPEAKER_02: And it took me a while and a few seasons of burnout before I realized what that really means and how you actually put them into place.
22:53
SPEAKER_02: How does does that resonate with you?
22:55
SPEAKER_00: Yeah, and I in working with clients, especially when you say boundaries to people and they no, I people won't like me.
23:04
SPEAKER_00: If I if I put up those big walls, nobody will like me.
23:08
SPEAKER_00: That people pleaser comes out.
23:10
SPEAKER_00: So I use the term, I use the term a lot in my in my work with guard as guardrails.
23:15
SPEAKER_00: In other words, guardrails on the highway.
23:18
SPEAKER_00: It keeps you can step over it if you want.
23:21
SPEAKER_00: You get out of the car, you can step over it, you can go.
23:23
SPEAKER_00: It's like a fence.
23:24
SPEAKER_00: But it kind of keeps you on the path, right?
23:28
SPEAKER_00: It kind of kind of gives you, it gives you boundary, the that guidelines to where those guardrails just kind of give you those guidelines to be able to keep you on track.
23:38
SPEAKER_00: And and that's the hard part being human is being rigid and consistent all the time.
23:45
SPEAKER_00: Why?
23:45
SPEAKER_00: Because we have emotions, we have all these things going on.
23:48
SPEAKER_00: And you know, it both you and I with the open mind, sometimes things aren't always A B C.
23:55
SPEAKER_00: Sometimes there's ZXB D G Z.
24:01
SPEAKER_00: And you go like this.
24:04
SPEAKER_00: When I first started on this journey through energy work and and healing, I I always went to school.
24:14
SPEAKER_00: And so much like math, you know, every step, you know, one thing led to another, led to another, led to another.
24:20
SPEAKER_00: It was a very concrete steps, right?
24:23
SPEAKER_00: They said, Oh no, you're in for a ride.
24:28
SPEAKER_00: And I don't if your journey is anything like mine, it started here, went over here, went over here, up here.
24:35
SPEAKER_00: Oh, look, butterfly.
24:37
SPEAKER_00: And so whatever caught your interest and whatever tied into what you were doing and thinking, and you were reading, and you were so into just became the next thing.
24:49
SPEAKER_00: I I have I have five modalities that I do, and I can never under kind of tell people, well, you know, so I just everybody knows what Reiki is, so I say, Oh, we're doing Reiki.
24:58
SPEAKER_00: Okay, they accept that.
25:00
SPEAKER_00: But there are five other modalities I do, plus coaching, plus plus, plus.
25:04
SPEAKER_00: And I can't explain all that, nor do they want to hear it and their eyes glaze over.
25:09
SPEAKER_00: But in doing the work, yeah, I think you'll find it in doing the work, we always add those other parts in that we've learned.
25:17
SPEAKER_00: And so it's never just a one concrete thing, and that's why we have to kind of define it and call it something else, because it's not really just it's everything, the culmination of the accumulation of all the experience, teachings, everything we've read, everything we do, and it constantly changes.
25:33
SPEAKER_00: We talked two years ago, and we are not the same people anywhere close to that that we were two years ago.
25:39
SPEAKER_00: No, and but but the connection we have, the person I know that you to be is still there, and that's that's what um the connection for me is what brings me joy, and where I constantly find it is in meeting people again and again and again wherever they are and meeting in that place.
26:04
SPEAKER_02: I love that so much.
26:06
SPEAKER_02: I wrote down two things.
26:07
SPEAKER_02: I'm writing down something else.
26:09
SPEAKER_02: Um I resonate so much with having many different directions.
26:18
SPEAKER_02: And, you know, people have literally, you know, I have a a full-time job as a pediatric occupational therapist working with children with severe physical disabilities, multiple disabilities, visual challenges, physical challenges.
26:33
SPEAKER_02: I do this podcast, I do coaching, I do speaking opportunities, and that's just like a small portion of all the things that I love.
26:42
SPEAKER_02: So the word that came to me when you were saying all of that, and and by the way, as a manifesting generator, that is correct for you.
26:49
SPEAKER_02: So we're not meant to exist in life, we're time benders.
26:54
SPEAKER_02: We we jump in and out of different things because that's that is correct for us.
27:00
SPEAKER_02: That's correct for our energy.
27:02
SPEAKER_02: And so the word that I love for that is multimodal.
27:06
SPEAKER_02: So um, and the cool thing about multimodal is that we are always onboarding new modes of serving people.
27:18
SPEAKER_02: And I think what you said that fully resonates with me is meeting people where they are.
27:25
SPEAKER_02: And I think to me, meeting people where they are, meeting myself where I am, is such divine and sacred practice.
27:36
SPEAKER_02: Because so many of us feel like we need to get to a certain state of being or place or accomplishments to like find our worthiness, acceptance, understanding.
27:48
SPEAKER_02: But really, the place where we find that self-security is where we are exactly right now.
27:57
SPEAKER_02: And then if you can love yourself in that place, if you can celebrate the heck out of yourself, if you can get excited about, yeah, I'm multi-passionate.
28:04
SPEAKER_02: There's a lot of things I love to do.
28:06
SPEAKER_02: And in two months' time, they might be completely different.
28:09
SPEAKER_02: And it is correct for me.
28:11
SPEAKER_02: And it's okay to be like that.
28:12
SPEAKER_02: But meeting people where they are, Scott, I think that is such a gift.
28:18
SPEAKER_02: And I don't know that everybody necessarily has such ease and access to that gift.
28:24
SPEAKER_02: I'd have to really think about it.
28:26
SPEAKER_02: Again, I have an open head.
28:27
SPEAKER_02: I can't be certain about that.
28:29
SPEAKER_02: But my suspicion and my intuition tells me that we may think that that's kind of like a no-brainer because it's so easy for us, but I don't know necessarily that everyone has that capacity or capability to really hold space for someone as they are, see them for who they are.
28:51
SPEAKER_02: And I do think that that is probably one of your top strengths to be able to hold that space for people.
29:00
SPEAKER_02: Does that resonate with you?
29:02
SPEAKER_00: It certainly does.
29:02
SPEAKER_00: And it's what I found in in going to Peru last year, what I found is really what it's it's about.
29:14
SPEAKER_00: It's my ability to hold space for people.
29:16
SPEAKER_00: And I never realized it, never saw it.
29:19
SPEAKER_00: I did it into intuitively, and now I see it fully for what it is.
29:24
SPEAKER_00: And I I really do find that people in in dealing with people, just being able to allow them the space to be able to be themselves and not have to put the mask on to be able to take the mask off.
29:40
SPEAKER_00: So we talk about it, we talked a little bit about anxiety, about overwhelming and and all of that.
29:45
SPEAKER_00: And I just wanted to bring a tool that people might be able to use.
29:49
SPEAKER_00: And I've I've used this with a number of people who have anxiety, or they get upset, or they get nervous.
29:56
SPEAKER_00: And that is for square breathing.
29:58
SPEAKER_00: And it's called box breathing, it's called uh there's a lot of terms for it, but it's very simple.
30:04
SPEAKER_00: And if you get upset, or you're I even do this at at night, you know, when you wake up at two o'clock in the morning, can't get back to sleep.
30:12
SPEAKER_00: So it's taking a deep breath in to the count of four, holding it for four, and in your mind you're you're counting.
30:23
SPEAKER_00: Release for four, follow it out, hold it for four, breathe in for four, hold it for four, release two, three, four, hold two, three, four.
30:41
SPEAKER_00: And when you do this four times, it's it's kind of that four square, it becomes a square.
30:47
SPEAKER_00: When you're counting in your head, one, two, three, four, other thoughts can't come through.
30:53
SPEAKER_00: So all those worries, all those things you're anxious about, whatever you're upset about, it it doesn't come in.
31:00
SPEAKER_00: And so now all of a sudden your anxiety level comes down, your shoulders relax.
31:07
SPEAKER_00: And I tell people, look, if you're really having a hard time or you get to that point, go to the bathroom.
31:14
SPEAKER_00: Just go into the bathroom, shut the door, and just do that breath.
31:18
SPEAKER_00: And you're gonna come out and feel so much better.
31:21
SPEAKER_00: So again, we come back to breath, right?
31:23
SPEAKER_00: The one thing that we do all the time, whether we think of it or not, using it as a tool.
31:29
SPEAKER_00: And when you concentrate on breath, you concentrate on yourself.
31:34
SPEAKER_02: Yes, yes, you do.
31:36
SPEAKER_02: Oh, I love that so much.
31:38
SPEAKER_02: And I think what some of these breathing patterns do so beautifully is really downregulate your nervous system when we're getting into that state of fight or flight, and our nervous system goes, goes haywire.
31:55
SPEAKER_02: We're in that heightened, not in our emotional wave.
31:59
SPEAKER_02: Now we're talking about like you're you're getting into that state where your body is in fight, flight, freeze, fawn, which is if you're people pleaser.
32:10
SPEAKER_02: Sorry to all of you who thought you were just being good and kind and thinking about others, you were actually fawning.
32:16
SPEAKER_02: If you didn't realize as people pleasing, we fawn, and that's a reaction of our nervous system to control the situation and calm ourselves down.
32:25
SPEAKER_02: What breathing does is it really gets into your diaphragm, which hits your vagus nerve, which downregulates your nervous system.
32:35
SPEAKER_02: When our nervous system comes back online, suddenly we're we back have access to our cognition and our our problem solving and making better choices for ourselves.
32:48
SPEAKER_02: Well, I love that you say that, like just excuse yourself to the restroom.
32:51
SPEAKER_02: Nobody's ever gonna deny you access to the restroom.
32:54
SPEAKER_02: So I feel like that's such a good out.
32:56
SPEAKER_02: I gotta go.
32:57
SPEAKER_02: And they're like, wow, they're I hope they're okay.
33:00
SPEAKER_02: But I think that's such a great, simple, easy tool.
33:04
SPEAKER_02: I love breathing.
33:05
SPEAKER_02: I love using breathing with my students because it's something we always have access to and something that we can do independently.
33:12
SPEAKER_02: And and we're doing it anyway.
33:14
SPEAKER_02: We might as well just use it as something that can really support us.
33:18
SPEAKER_02: So so the science backs what you're saying.
33:21
SPEAKER_02: And that's where my my one three geeks out a little bit because so many of these tools are just so well designed for the human body.
33:30
SPEAKER_02: So I love that.
33:31
SPEAKER_02: And I think four by four is so great.
33:35
SPEAKER_02: And yes, I agree with you.
33:36
SPEAKER_02: In the middle of the night, when your mind gets busy, this is a great strategy.
33:40
SPEAKER_02: So if you have an open head like Scott and I, or you're a manifesting generator, or just somebody who is juggling a lot of things right now, and you know, sleep can be challenging.
33:51
SPEAKER_02: And and there's a lot of disruptions in the world right now and things that are short sort of shaking our foundation.
33:58
SPEAKER_02: And when our foundation feels unsteady, it's very hard for our nervous systems to trust that getting a good night's sleep is is okay and safe for us.
34:09
SPEAKER_02: And recognizing that there's there's nothing wrong with you for not sleeping well right now.
34:15
SPEAKER_02: It's it's just your nervous system is responding to what's going on.
34:19
SPEAKER_02: It's feeling it.
34:20
SPEAKER_02: And you may also be feeling collective energy, you know.
34:23
SPEAKER_02: I think that's something I didn't realize.
34:26
SPEAKER_02: I I really always thought every thought and idea and something that was happening was mine.
34:30
SPEAKER_02: And now I know that it's not.
34:32
SPEAKER_02: I have an open head.
34:33
SPEAKER_02: I also have an open ajna.
34:35
SPEAKER_02: So I have that added extra taking in everybody else's stuff.
34:41
SPEAKER_02: And so doing that box breathing and then really settling into my body and saying, hmm, what if this is really mine to hold, to take responsibility for perspective again, that great word that you use.
34:58
SPEAKER_02: And then if it's not mine, releasing it from my body and saying, I don't need to hold on to this.
35:06
SPEAKER_00: And that's where curiosity really comes in.
35:09
SPEAKER_00: You know, asking those questions, asking the question, hey, is this mine?
35:14
SPEAKER_00: Is this my energy?
35:16
SPEAKER_00: Is this something that I'm supposed to deal with, or is this something that I can just let go?
35:21
SPEAKER_00: And when you let something go that isn't yours, it lightens the load.
35:26
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, sure does.
35:28
SPEAKER_02: It sure does.
35:29
SPEAKER_02: And then and then you can sleep well, and then we can become a little bit more discerning.
35:35
SPEAKER_02: We can have sovereignty, we can from that place really make very meaningful decisions about where we put our energy and where we put up boundaries.
35:47
SPEAKER_02: And maybe a good boundary for you, I know for me, is I don't watch the news.
35:52
SPEAKER_02: I don't, you know, I really try not to let myself take too much of it in, and not because I don't want to be informed.
36:01
SPEAKER_02: It's because I feel everything and I take it all in.
36:05
SPEAKER_02: And I know that my power and strength and ability to do things for other people is it requires of me to be in a very centered place.
36:19
SPEAKER_00: In a safe place.
36:20
SPEAKER_02: In a safe place.
36:21
SPEAKER_02: And for me, it's not and and let's not forget that the information that is coming to us is spun and cultivated and meant to be sensational.
36:36
SPEAKER_02: So if you're somebody who watches Halmart commercials and cries, or you know, has to like hide when they when they see or hear things that are too violent in movies, then you're probably somebody who has a difficult time um not feeling for other people's experiences.
36:57
SPEAKER_02: And you may not want to allow that into your aura unless you're feeling like you can be very boundried and understand it at a different level.
37:09
SPEAKER_02: And it and it empowers you and gives you feel to do what you're meant to do.
37:15
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
37:16
SPEAKER_00: I live with an empath who does exactly that.
37:20
SPEAKER_00: She cries at Hallmark commercials, she she does that, she feels so much for other people.
37:26
SPEAKER_00: And so we have to be very careful about what we curate for her, the news, the things that come up.
38:55
SPEAKER_00: She can't watch the news because 15 minutes in, she's in tears.
39:00
SPEAKER_00: So that's that sensitivity.
39:03
SPEAKER_00: And that's by the way, the reason I she is she is my heart.
39:09
SPEAKER_00: She has found allowed me to find my way to my heart, and she anchors me in that respect.
39:15
SPEAKER_00: And I know that it's coming up on the on the on the half hour.
39:20
SPEAKER_00: And I I want to say thank you for this extraordinary conversation.
39:25
SPEAKER_00: You always bring out the best in me.
39:27
SPEAKER_02: Oh, thank you for that.
39:29
SPEAKER_02: That's a really good compliment.
39:30
SPEAKER_02: I'll take it.
39:31
SPEAKER_02: Receiving, receiving, which if you're if you're someone who's always giving and doing for others, receiving can maybe feel uncomfortable.
39:39
SPEAKER_02: But I think that's one of the themes right now.
39:41
SPEAKER_02: I think getting into a state of being open to receiving good things and feeling you're worth and deserving of not just giving to others, especially if you're a generator or manifesting generator.
39:57
SPEAKER_02: And I'm I'm saying those specifically because I've lived that life, not saying that projectors, manifestors, and reflectors cannot also be very giving and struggle with giving and receiving.
40:08
SPEAKER_02: But I know for me, feeling that pressure to give and to serve, it can be challenging to receive.
40:19
SPEAKER_02: And I've definitely learned a lot about myself and how to take a compliment versus being like, oh, it's nothing.
40:25
SPEAKER_02: You know, I I try not to say that anymore.
40:28
SPEAKER_02: Certainly the patterns are there, but um that you notice that.
40:32
SPEAKER_02: Yeah, thank you.
40:33
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for that because I I also in getting better at it receiving compliments when they come.
40:40
SPEAKER_00: Because I always said, Oh, I never expect it.
40:43
SPEAKER_00: You know, I don't I never I don't need it.
40:46
SPEAKER_00: You know what?
40:47
SPEAKER_00: It's kind of nice when you when someone says something nice about you and you can just say, Yep, thank you.
40:56
SPEAKER_02: Recently I was in my Kashik records and just looking for a little guidance on some things.
41:02
SPEAKER_02: And what I was given is to picture how the ocean waves go in and out and in and out.
41:14
SPEAKER_02: Give, receive, give, receive.
41:18
SPEAKER_02: It's not meant to be like give, give, give, and hope that somebody will throw a breadcrumb your way.
41:23
SPEAKER_02: It's meant to be in a flow and that expecting and being ready to receive is not a negative thing.
41:33
SPEAKER_02: It's what we're meant to do.
41:35
SPEAKER_02: And interestingly, I'll just throw this last tidbit out.
41:38
SPEAKER_02: Right now, in terms of looking at the planetary transits, and we can look at the transits as impacting our human design.
41:46
SPEAKER_02: So we have our individual body graph chart with our design with defined and undefined and open and closed centers.
41:55
SPEAKER_02: And then we have what's actually happening in terms of the sun, the moon, the planets, other celestial beings that are moving in different places.
42:04
SPEAKER_02: And so right now in the north node and south node are 37 and 40, which are all about giving, receiving boundaries.
42:15
SPEAKER_02: And it's been there for a bit and it'll be there until sometime in May, like towards the beginning of May.
42:21
SPEAKER_02: So that theme is playing out right now.
42:24
SPEAKER_02: And so we may feel that more, that sense of like duty to others and and playing out the way that that becomes resourceful or not for us.
42:36
SPEAKER_02: And that's that's why I geek out of looking at the transits, because knowing that that's a pattern and a theme up there.
42:43
SPEAKER_02: And I mean, the other day, literally, I I have some friends over on LinkedIn and we support each other's posts.
42:52
SPEAKER_02: And the the theme of giving and overgiving was in several posts of people that I know.
42:59
SPEAKER_02: I was like, like the the timing is impeccable.
43:03
SPEAKER_02: So I sort of trust now that if I'm feeling that theme, there's probably a reason why.
43:09
SPEAKER_02: And I believe all of that shifting, all that planetary stuff, whether you're somebody who subscribes to human design, astrology, eaching, all of those things or not, you know, you get to decide.
43:22
SPEAKER_02: But it helps me to understand what's happening, to know what is coming up for me to be available to repattern or heal right now.
43:32
SPEAKER_02: Getting curious about it and excited about it and like, oh yeah, let's look at my boundaries from a place of curiosity, which is kind of funny that that's coming to me now, Scott.
43:42
SPEAKER_02: But like I get to be joyful about it.
43:44
SPEAKER_02: Like, oh wow, look at how I used to fawn so much.
43:48
SPEAKER_02: How much people pleasing and and how that pattern that groove, oops, that pattern and that groove is so easy to fall back into.
43:59
SPEAKER_02: I was I was literally going to say fall back into and my phone fell.
44:02
SPEAKER_02: So that that to me is the universe like fall back into, like, like a groove on a record player.
44:08
SPEAKER_02: Like you could just get stuck in that skip, and that then I can go, oh, there it is again.
44:13
SPEAKER_02: And like, all right, let's let's see if we can repattern that.
44:16
SPEAKER_02: And what does it look like for me to shift my habits and behaviors to repattern that?
44:21
SPEAKER_02: So what what did you want to say to that?
44:25
SPEAKER_00: Wow, yes, very easy to fall back into those learned behaviors.
44:30
SPEAKER_00: We yes, we've we've created new patterns.
44:34
SPEAKER_00: Yes, we have created kind of new pathways, but the old ones are still there.
44:40
SPEAKER_00: They can be due detours, you know.
44:42
SPEAKER_00: When we when we get tired, when we get overwhelmed, sometimes we fall back into the because it's they were easy, and we know those routes, and we we're familiar with them.
44:54
SPEAKER_00: And maintaining the the integrity of who we are today takes energy until it becomes the old pattern again.
45:02
SPEAKER_00: It becomes your old pattern.
45:05
SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
45:06
SPEAKER_01: Mm-hmm.
45:07
SPEAKER_02: Yep, yep, yep.
45:08
SPEAKER_02: All yeses to that.
45:10
SPEAKER_02: I have definitely had those experiences.
45:13
SPEAKER_02: Scott, I just got an intuitive hit to to pull a card for for the listener and for us for today.
45:19
SPEAKER_02: Are you open to that?
45:21
SPEAKER_00: Absolutely.
45:22
SPEAKER_00: I love I love.
45:25
SPEAKER_02: I'm gonna I'm gonna go for the light sears.
45:29
SPEAKER_02: I love this.
45:30
SPEAKER_02: This is such a beautiful deck.
45:31
SPEAKER_02: So let's see what what is coming up for for all of us.
45:38
SPEAKER_02: Sort of a a theme.
45:40
SPEAKER_02: Oops okay, who jumped out?
45:42
SPEAKER_02: When they jump out, that has strong meaning.
45:45
SPEAKER_02: So three of pentacles, and as I do love to teach people, and we'll we'll uh some I don't know if I can get a picture in the show notes, but I'll try to get this in the show notes.
45:55
SPEAKER_02: If you're somebody who has never done terror.
45:58
SPEAKER_02: Or Oracle Dex, it's so simple.
46:00
SPEAKER_02: They send little books with you.
46:02
SPEAKER_02: You literally flip through and find what it is, and then just read and see what resonates.
46:08
SPEAKER_02: So this says the themes are cooperation, community, teaching and learning, sharing and listening, teamwork.
46:15
SPEAKER_02: There is no limit to what you can manifest together.
46:19
SPEAKER_02: Okay.
46:20
SPEAKER_02: And it says working with others gifts us with the opportunity to learn from one another and to blend energies to create something totally new.
46:28
SPEAKER_02: Look for conscious collaborators as mentors, apprentices, or both.
46:32
SPEAKER_02: Co-creating together for the good of the whole is powerful magic.
46:36
SPEAKER_02: And this teamwork and community card calls you forth to add your unique essence to the bigger picture.
46:42
SPEAKER_02: Remember that your relationships are the base of your well-being.
46:46
SPEAKER_02: And then I like this deck because it has an affirmation.
46:51
SPEAKER_02: I step into the vibration of conscious collaboration.
46:56
SPEAKER_02: So I think to me, this feels like such a great summary.
47:01
SPEAKER_02: And what really strikes me is the idea of teaching and learning, sharing and listening.
47:09
SPEAKER_02: And relationships are the basis for well-being.
47:13
SPEAKER_02: And I think what's so funny to me about that is that you're a four-six, Scott.
47:19
SPEAKER_02: And four is all about those relationships.
47:22
SPEAKER_02: So I feel like this is both a beautiful card about your energy and also a calling for people right now.
47:31
SPEAKER_02: And that three of pentacles energy of working together.
47:35
SPEAKER_02: And uh, if you're only listening to this and you can't look at the picture, I'll describe it for you.
47:40
SPEAKER_02: So there's three people, one person is holding a tapestry up while someone sews at it and somebody else holds the yarn.
47:50
SPEAKER_02: So it's a it's a full collaboration of three people.
47:55
SPEAKER_02: So Scott, I think that's that's a really cool card.
47:59
SPEAKER_02: Any any thoughts on the card?
48:02
SPEAKER_00: It it actually summarized everything we've talked about today.
48:06
SPEAKER_02: Totally did.
48:07
SPEAKER_02: It really did.
48:08
SPEAKER_02: Scott, I I don't want to miss out on the opportunity for you to share what you have going on and how people can get into your community and your world.
48:17
SPEAKER_02: So would you share a little bit about that with us?
48:19
SPEAKER_00: Thank you.
48:20
SPEAKER_00: RscottHolmes.com is my website.
48:24
SPEAKER_00: We have between Kelly and I, I think we have about 20 books that we've collaborated on.
48:29
SPEAKER_00: She is a beautiful writer and really prolific.
48:33
SPEAKER_00: I'm working as a lead author right now on a book called From Burning Bright, From Burnout to Burning Bright, about burnout and overwhelm in the world.
48:41
SPEAKER_00: And I thought it was very, very important.
48:42
SPEAKER_00: It's coming out in May.
48:45
SPEAKER_00: And it has 25 different stories.
48:48
SPEAKER_00: And the funny thing, and we're in the process of writing, is these accomplished authors that are in the book are having such a very hard time with this topic because they are reliving when they were in burnout and having to kind of go back through those emotions again.
49:08
SPEAKER_00: So it's it's it's time, and I think it's needed, and I think it's what we we need to talk about.
49:15
SPEAKER_02: I love that.
49:16
SPEAKER_02: And I would love for you to come back when the book is ready to be released into the world and talk more about it.
49:24
SPEAKER_02: I think that book is going to be so phenomenal and well-timed for this year.
49:30
SPEAKER_02: If listener, you've been really moved, I really encourage you to connect with Scott.
49:36
SPEAKER_02: We'll have all the ways you can find him in the show notes.
49:39
SPEAKER_02: Please like, share, and invite someone to check out this conversation.
49:45
SPEAKER_02: When you follow the podcast, when you comment, when you share it with other people, you get this message out.
49:53
SPEAKER_02: And I believe that the work that Scott and I and others like us are doing is really bringing about a better future for ourselves, for our children, and for generations to come.
50:05
SPEAKER_02: So please support us.
50:07
SPEAKER_02: And I hope you enjoyed this episode.
50:10
SPEAKER_02: And we'll see you next time on the podcast.
50:12
SPEAKER_02: Bye for now.
50:14
SPEAKER_00: Bye.