Latest / Something Extra / The Human Side of Tech Leadership w/ Bryan Muehlberger

Transcript

The Human Side of Tech Leadership w/ Bryan Muehlberger · Something Extra

• 0:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: I do these dinners, CXO rise dinners, and I bring these executives together
• 0:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: and, you know, everyone's I'm the CIO and CTO of x y z company.
• 0:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: But at the end of the day, they're all humans, and they're all dealing
• 0:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: with something.
• 0:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Something.
• 0:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and as I've got to know these big, powerful leaders, you know, they're
• 0:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: they're they're dealing with child children issues.
• 0:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 0:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: Their child's, you know, hurting themselves.
• 0:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: They're they've got, you know, a no relationship with their wife because they're busy
• 0:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: with work all the time.
• 0:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: And they're dealing with all of these things, yet they're performing still.
• 0:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so, I always just say, like, there's more we're complex people.
• 0:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: There's more behind the scenes, and and remember that as a as a leader
• 0:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: for sure.
• 0:41
  Lisa Nichols: It takes something a little more to lead with impact.
• 0:44
  Lisa Nichols: I'm Lisa Nichols, author of Something Extra, and this podcast
• 0:49
  Lisa Nichols: was inspired by our daughter, Ali, whose additional chromosome has shaped
• 0:53
  Lisa Nichols: how I see people in leadership.
• 0:56
  Lisa Nichols: Each episode features conversations with inspiring leaders from around the world
• 1:00
  Lisa Nichols: about what truly defines how they lead and serve others.
• 1:04
  Lisa Nichols: If you enjoyed today's conversation, please consider leaving a five
• 1:08
  Lisa Nichols: star review.
• 1:09
  Lisa Nichols: It helps more people discover the show.
• 1:12
  Lisa Nichols: And if you'd like to go deeper, my book, Something Extra, is available on
• 1:16
  Lisa Nichols: Amazon and through other major book retailers.
• 1:20
  Lisa Nichols: Join us today as we sit down with Bryan Muehlberger, founder of Lumio
• 1:24
  Lisa Nichols: and CXO Rise, CTO at the Health Institute, and the
• 1:28
  Lisa Nichols: author of Rise Human, for compelling conversation on leadership,
• 1:32
  Lisa Nichols: technology, and navigating life's unexpected turns.
• 1:36
  Lisa Nichols: From pioneer and corporate innovation to turning personal tragedy into a powerful
• 1:40
  Lisa Nichols: force for change, Bryan brings a uniquely resilient and insightful perspective
• 1:45
  Lisa Nichols: to the show.
• 1:46
  Lisa Nichols: Well, Bryan Muehlberger, welcome to the Something Extra podcast,
• 1:50
  Lisa Nichols: my friend.
• 1:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'm so happy to be here.
• 1:52
  Lisa Nichols: I know.
• 1:54
  Lisa Nichols: It's so good to see you too.
• 1:56
  Lisa Nichols: I'm so grateful.
• 1:57
  Lisa Nichols: We were just talking.
• 1:57
  Lisa Nichols: We've known each other for a very long time because you're a Saint Louis
• 2:01
  Lisa Nichols: boy.
• 2:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: Go Cardinals.
• 2:03
  Lisa Nichols: And you're in yeah.
• 2:04
  Lisa Nichols: Go Cardinals.
• 2:05
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 2:06
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, we're originally from Kentucky, and, we just
• 2:10
  Lisa Nichols: couldn't believe it.
• 2:11
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 2:11
  Lisa Nichols: Like, how much people are just in love with the Cardinals, but
• 2:15
  Lisa Nichols: we are too now.
• 2:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 2:17
  Lisa Nichols: After being here for forty two years, it's like you can't live in Saint
• 2:20
  Lisa Nichols: Louis and not love the Cardinals.
• 2:22
  Lisa Nichols: Such a great club.
• 2:23
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 2:24
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 2:24
  Lisa Nichols: Such a great club.
• 2:27
  Lisa Nichols: But, you know, we've been in the tech you're you're in the tech your
• 2:30
  Lisa Nichols: whole life.
• 2:31
  Lisa Nichols: You've been in the tech community, and that's what we are.
• 2:33
  Lisa Nichols: So you and I have known each other for a really long time, and
• 2:36
  Lisa Nichols: you've moved around.
• 2:37
  Lisa Nichols: And we talked, you know, sometimes you lose track of people, but you and
• 2:40
  Lisa Nichols: I have stayed connected.
• 2:41
  Lisa Nichols: And I'm really, really grateful for that, you know, because you were in California
• 2:45
  Lisa Nichols: for a while and LA, and now you're you're, in a suburb
• 2:49
  Lisa Nichols: of Atlanta.
• 2:50
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 2:50
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 2:50
  Lisa Nichols: So but, you know, let's talk about...
• 2:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: The good ones stay in touch for sure.
• 2:55
  Lisa Nichols: I know.
• 2:55
  Lisa Nichols: I'm so grateful for that.
• 2:57
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 2:57
  Lisa Nichols: Relationships are there have been so many blessings from
• 3:02
  Lisa Nichols: being at Technology Partners and doing what we've been doing for so many years,
• 3:06
  Lisa Nichols: but the great one of the greatest lessons is the people.
• 3:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 3:08
  Lisa Nichols: The people that we've met along the way and the relationships we've made.
• 3:11
  Lisa Nichols: So, I just wanted to to say I'm grateful that
• 3:15
  Lisa Nichols: you're in my orbit.
• 3:16
  Lisa Nichols: I appreciate that.
• 3:18
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 3:19
  Lisa Nichols: So like I said, you I mean, you started in technology.
• 3:22
  Lisa Nichols: You started, like, building servers and working help desk, I think, Bryan.
• 3:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: God.
• 3:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's a long time ago.
• 3:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: But yeah.
• 3:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 3:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: Back in the hardware days.
• 3:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 3:30
  Lisa Nichols: Back in the hardware days.
• 3:31
  Lisa Nichols: So what did those early years teach you
• 3:35
  Lisa Nichols: that still influence you today?
• 3:37
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 3:38
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, like star, by the way.
• 3:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's it's crazy to even think back that far.
• 3:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: But, because, I mean, like, I started my career in
• 3:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: ninety three.
• 3:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 3:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I always say it's like before the Internet's the Internet.
• 3:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: We know of it as of today.
• 3:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so Yes.
• 3:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: I've seen it all change and so forth.
• 3:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's been been pretty crazy.
• 3:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would say the biggest thing I would say I take away from those
• 4:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: early days is, you know, I was always, like, very curious how things work.
• 4:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 4:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so I think that always served me well.
• 4:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: Just digging in, trying to figure it out.
• 4:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: Back then, it was picking up a book, you know, then eventually, it was
• 4:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: finding it online, and and now we have AI to help us.
• 4:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: But I've always been one that likes to figure out how things work and
• 4:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: and and learn how to solve it myself.
• 4:22
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 4:22
  Lisa Nichols: Curiosity is really important.
• 4:24
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 4:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 4:26
  Lisa Nichols: Hopefully, because I'm curious too and, you know, always want to learn.
• 4:30
  Lisa Nichols: Hope I never get tired of that.
• 4:32
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 4:33
  Lisa Nichols: Hope I never yeah.
• 4:35
  Lisa Nichols: But you've been at some really iconic brands.
• 4:38
  Lisa Nichols: You've been a multi time CIO, CTO, and I didn't even realize this to
• 4:42
  Lisa Nichols: but today, we we were just talking, and you just took on a CTO
• 4:45
  Lisa Nichols: role for a new company.
• 4:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: I did.
• 4:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 4:48
  Lisa Nichols: In Franklin, Tennessee. The Health Institute.
• 4:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: The Health Institute.
• 4:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's right.
• 4:51
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 4:52
  Lisa Nichols: But you've been at companies such as Red Bull, Beachbody.
• 4:57
  Lisa Nichols: Before that, Pfizer and Express Scripts, that's when you and I first Yeah.
• 5:01
  Lisa Nichols: Met.
• 5:01
  Lisa Nichols: But you've seen a lot of great technology leaders
• 5:05
  Lisa Nichols: over the years, Bryan.
• 5:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 5:07
  Lisa Nichols: You know, what separates the really great ones from the average ones
• 5:11
  Lisa Nichols: in your mind?
• 5:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oh, wow.
• 5:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I would say, you know, they're they lead with their heart.
• 5:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 5:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: They care about their people.
• 5:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think that's probably number one.
• 5:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: Number two is they're willing to push people out of their comfort zones
• 5:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: and and get them to to to realize where their potential really lies.
• 5:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I you know, I've got I had so many great leaders in my
• 5:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: past that that shaped me in many ways.
• 5:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think back to my Express Scripts days, and I remember Jim Lammers.
• 5:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know Jim.
• 5:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 5:39
  Lisa Nichols: I sure do.
• 5:39
  Lisa Nichols: Jim as well.
• 5:40
  Lisa Nichols: Love Jim.
• 5:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 5:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I worked for Jim for a number of years.
• 5:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I remember one time him saying to me, Bryan, you don't need to
• 5:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: be the smartest person in the room.
• 5:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 5:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and it was like, wow.
• 5:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: A little bit of a gut check there.
• 5:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: But it made me realize, like, you don't have to win every argument.
• 5:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: You don't have to be the smartest person in the room.
• 5:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: What you have to do is learn how to lead and through people.
• 6:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 6:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 6:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: Partner with people.
• 6:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it it really just shaped me as a leader from that point forward.
• 6:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: It really helped me grow quite a bit.
• 6:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so I think it was someone someone who's willing to give you those
• 6:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: heart to heart talks and tell you tell you the real truth or, like,
• 6:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: you know, and give you those maybe maybe those uncomfortable moments, but at the
• 6:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: same time, you know, they they lead with purpose.
• 6:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: They lead with that that that heart as well.
• 6:19
  Lisa Nichols: That's so good.
• 6:20
  Lisa Nichols: That's so good.
• 6:20
  Lisa Nichols: I was just talking to another friend right before you, Bryan.
• 6:24
  Lisa Nichols: Same thing about,
• 6:27
  Lisa Nichols: talking about those people.
• 6:29
  Lisa Nichols: You need those people in your life that I I call them
• 6:33
  Lisa Nichols: I don't want bobbleheads.
• 6:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: You're right.
• 6:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: You don't want just everyone doing everything.
• 6:37
  Lisa Nichols: Oh, yeah.
• 6:38
  Lisa Nichols: You're you're doing a great job.
• 6:40
  Lisa Nichols: You know, you want those people that are gonna to give you the hard
• 6:42
  Lisa Nichols: truth.
• 6:43
  Lisa Nichols: In fact, my friend goes, I need people to point out my blind spots.
• 6:46
  Lisa Nichols: They're called blind spots for a reason because I don't recognize them.
• 6:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right.
• 6:49
  Lisa Nichols: I lean to them.
• 6:50
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 6:51
  Lisa Nichols: Totally.
• 6:52
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 6:53
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 6:54
  Lisa Nichols: I'm glad that, that Jim was that for you.
• 6:58
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 6:58
  Lisa Nichols: I'm really grateful that I
• 6:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: have great leaders throughout my career, and, you know, every every once taught me
• 7:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: something about myself and how to lead and how to be a better person
• 7:06
  Lisa Nichols: for sure.
• 7:07
  Lisa Nichols: Yep.
• 7:07
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 7:09
  Lisa Nichols: Well, let me ask you this because you'd, like, started with this where you
• 7:12
  Lisa Nichols: said you're just always curious.
• 7:14
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 7:14
  Lisa Nichols: You're a curious person.
• 7:16
  Lisa Nichols: How have you
• 7:18
  Lisa Nichols: curated and cultivated that curiosity in yourself?
• 7:22
  Lisa Nichols: But then more importantly, how have you done that for the teams that you
• 7:26
  Lisa Nichols: lead?
• 7:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 7:27
  Lisa Nichols: How do you get them to be curious?
• 7:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 7:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, it's it's, it's asking lots of questions.
• 7:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, I remember reading a book called The More Beautiful Question at one
• 7:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: point, and sometimes I
• 7:36
  Lisa Nichols: read that book.
• 7:37
  Lisa Nichols: I love that book.
• 7:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 7:39
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 7:39
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 7:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, his last name was
• 7:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: Burger.
• 7:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: Warren Burger, I think is what's his name.
• 7:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: Great great book.
• 7:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: It just really made you think about, like, you know, you can ask one
• 7:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: question, but that's not really the question you're trying to ask.
• 7:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, if you keep on asking more questions and getting the right question,
• 7:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: then you can solve the problem.
• 7:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I always get people to to think differently.
• 8:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, look at it from a different lens and a different point of view.
• 8:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, we as technicians are always looking at how do we solve it
• 8:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: the most effect effective efficient way with tech.
• 8:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yes.
• 8:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: Sometimes the most effective way is not even putting tech in the in the
• 8:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: middle.
• 8:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 8:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, maybe there's a broken process somewhere.
• 8:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: Maybe there's a another business opportunity down the road that you need to just
• 8:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: revise at the business side.
• 8:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: So it's it's looking at it differently and Yes.
• 8:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: Being them to kinda think differently that way and ask questions.
• 8:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think that's probably the the biggest one.
• 8:29
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 8:29
  Lisa Nichols: And have you seen that?
• 8:30
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, have you seen people transform, you know, into being more
• 8:35
  Lisa Nichols: that.
• 8:35
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 8:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 8:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, you know Yeah.
• 8:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I think, you know, we're such type a analytical people.
• 8:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: We're not the typically the creative folks.
• 8:43
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 8:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so you've gotta tap that right side, you know, more often and work
• 8:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: on that.
• 8:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: And when you see people balance both very, very well, that creates
• 8:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: a very dynamic leader.
• 8:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 8:54
  Lisa Nichols: Oh, for sure.
• 8:56
  Lisa Nichols: For sure.
• 8:58
  Lisa Nichols: Well, I know that you've led through incredible, periods of disruption.
• 9:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 9:02
  Lisa Nichols: Bryan, I think back to Express Scripts days.
• 9:05
  Lisa Nichols: Wow.
• 9:06
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, when we started Technology Partners, would you believe it?
• 9:09
  Lisa Nichols: We were there when Barretone was getting loans and stuff.
• 9:13
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 9:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 9:14
  Lisa Nichols: And then they just went through all kinds of, you know, mergers and
• 9:19
  Lisa Nichols: acquisitions and things like that.
• 9:20
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 9:20
  Lisa Nichols: But what and so and and even now, there's a lot of disruption, right,
• 9:24
  Lisa Nichols: with AI and quantum computing and all the things that are coming out.
• 9:29
  Lisa Nichols: What is one leadership lesson that has helped
• 9:33
  Lisa Nichols: you navigate
• 9:35
  Lisa Nichols: uncertainty and change like that?
• 9:38
  Lisa Nichols: And then how have you helped your team do that?
• 9:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: So, I mean, you're right.
• 9:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: We we deal with,
• 9:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: a plethora of disruption and change constantly in our business.
• 9:49
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 9:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: And everything
• 9:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: revolves around technology now.
• 9:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 9:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we're we're we're touching every aspect of the business.
• 9:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and to be able to to balance that and not lose your mind
• 10:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: is is is a big deal.
• 10:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 10:05
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 10:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, it's like, you know, you've got security issues going on.
• 10:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: You've got AI disruption.
• 10:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: You've got quantum.
• 10:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, you've just seen so much change, and it's evolved how businesses
• 10:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: operate.
• 10:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I would say it's, you know, it's it's really kind of taking that
• 10:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: step back, taking a deep breath, and and really just going, like, where's the
• 10:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: real problem we need to focus on?
• 10:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: We're all limited on resources.
• 10:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: We can never have enough of them, and there's never enough dollars to go
• 10:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: around to to solve every problem.
• 10:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: So it's it's really taking that that deep breath, stepping back and going, you
• 10:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: know, what's the real challenge I wanna go after?
• 10:38
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 10:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: How do I wanna solve that?
• 10:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: And how do I partner with other folks to get that done?
• 10:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 10:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, we can't do it alone.
• 10:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, there's, again, going back to being the smartest person
• 10:48
  Lisa Nichols: Amen to that.
• 10:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 10:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: There's a lot more power in the group than there is in the individual.
• 10:53
  Lisa Nichols: Oh.
• 10:54
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 10:54
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 10:54
  Lisa Nichols: That's that's good.
• 10:56
  Lisa Nichols: That's a great word of wisdom there, Bryan.
• 11:00
  Lisa Nichols: Well, if you were mentoring a brand new CIO and like I said, you
• 11:03
  Lisa Nichols: have been multi time now CIO, CTO,
• 11:08
  Lisa Nichols: for many different iconic brands.
• 11:10
  Lisa Nichols: If you were mentoring a brand new CIO today, what advice would you
• 11:14
  Lisa Nichols: give them,
• 11:16
  Lisa Nichols: that most leadership books never mention?
• 11:18
  Lisa Nichols: And then I wanna ask you about books because I know that you're a
• 11:21
  Lisa Nichols: voracious reader Yeah.
• 11:22
  Lisa Nichols: And I wanna ask you about that.
• 11:24
  Lisa Nichols: But what advice would you give them?
• 11:26
  Lisa Nichols: Brand new CIO.
• 11:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: Brand new CIO.
• 11:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would say, like, you've really just gotta step into that.
• 11:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's a completely different role than being an individual contributor for sure.
• 11:39
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 11:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's completely different than being, the owner of a specific vertical
• 11:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: within technology.
• 11:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: You out now own it all.
• 11:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: So you've kinda gotta be a master of all, you know, so to say,
• 11:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: you know, but you can't be.
• 11:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so you've got to really learn how to lead through others and and
• 11:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: let go of the reins.
• 11:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: And what I mean by that is you might have an idea of how
• 12:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: something should get solved.
• 12:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: And what the real problem is, but don't give the answer.
• 12:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: Let them figure the answer out.
• 12:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: And they might find it differently than you might have, but that's their creative
• 12:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: path on how they're gonna learn how to lead.
• 12:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so push them in those directions.
• 12:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I would say, if I was the new CIO, try different things.
• 12:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: Be willing to take that risk that maybe feels a little bit outside of
• 12:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: your comfort zone when you're trying something different.
• 12:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: Because it is a different role.
• 12:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 12:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's it's a it's a different beast in in itself.
• 12:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so, you know, be willing to step out of the out of the
• 12:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: norm, you know, wear that new hat differently.
• 12:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: And remember, you now have a seat at the table that you need to
• 12:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: honor.
• 12:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: And that means carrying your baton as well, but also partner with the other
• 12:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: business leaders, and how do you make them successful as well.
• 12:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's not just about tech being successful for tech's sake.
• 12:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's how do we drive success for the organization as a whole.
• 12:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: So thinking more like a business leader throughout that entire process.
• 12:58
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 12:59
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 13:00
  Lisa Nichols: And I love that you mentioned working with the other business leaders
• 13:04
  Lisa Nichols: because you cannot in fact, you know, I've talked to so many
• 13:09
  Lisa Nichols: tech leaders, and it's like when you do work with Mhmm.
• 13:13
  Lisa Nichols: The CHRO or the CFO and you build relationships
• 13:17
  Lisa Nichols: with them, Bryan, when it's time for change or when it's time
• 13:21
  Lisa Nichols: for something, you can go so much faster.
• 13:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oh, totally.
• 13:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 13:25
  Lisa Nichols: If you have those relationships, you have relational capital.
• 13:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: If you've discredited y ourself and burnt those bridges along the way, it's gonna be a lot
• 13:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: harder to get things done.
• 13:33
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 13:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: So you're hundred percent right.
• 13:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: Build those relationships early and often.
• 13:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 13:37
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 13:37
  Lisa Nichols: That's so good.
• 13:39
  Lisa Nichols: Well, I was gonna say, I know you read a lot, and you already
• 13:42
  Lisa Nichols: mentioned a beautiful question.
• 13:44
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 13:44
  Lisa Nichols: I highly recommend our listeners getting that book.
• 13:48
  Lisa Nichols: But is there one or two other books or publications that really change how
• 13:52
  Lisa Nichols: you have led or how you think about leadership that you would
• 13:56
  Lisa Nichols: recommend to our listeners?
• 13:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would say the number one is and I and I go back to
• 14:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: it a lot because it's it's all on stoicism.
• 14:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's ego is the enemy.
• 14:06
  Lisa Nichols: Ooooo.
• 14:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: Have you read that one?
• 14:08
  Lisa Nichols: I have not, but that sounds like one I wanna read.
• 14:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: He's written a number of books on stoicism, but ego is the enemy is
• 14:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: one that sticks out front and center.
• 14:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then I would say the subtle art of not giving an f.
• 14:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 14:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: That book, if you've not read that one, that's another one.
• 14:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would just say one is, you know, how do you get yourself out
• 14:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: of the way of the problem?
• 14:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 14:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: And the other one is, like, to also take things lightly and and, like,
• 14:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: enjoy life.
• 14:33
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 14:34
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 14:34
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 14:34
  Lisa Nichols: That's good.
• 14:35
  Lisa Nichols: That's good.
• 14:36
  Lisa Nichols: Well, we could probably camp out there for a little bit.
• 14:39
  Lisa Nichols: I got so many questions for you.
• 14:41
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 14:41
  Lisa Nichols: So, I mean, here's here's the cool thing.
• 14:44
  Lisa Nichols: When you went to Red Bull, I mean, you've built innovation organizations
• 14:48
  Lisa Nichols: within companies.
• 14:49
  Lisa Nichols: And at Red Bull, you built the Red Bull Labs.
• 14:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 14:54
  Lisa Nichols: Which I, yeah, which I just love.
• 14:56
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, how do you create a culture where innovation really becomes everyone's
• 15:00
  Lisa Nichols: responsibility, Bryan?
• 15:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 15:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 15:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: That was, you know, at the time, there were a lot of companies creating,
• 15:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: like, innovation teams.
• 15:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 15:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: It was like, how do you create this incubator with inside your company so
• 15:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: you can be more entrepreneurial and solve, you know, these problems in unique ways
• 15:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: and looking at startups and how they do it and things like that?
• 15:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: What we said was we don't want one team to own innovation.
• 15:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's everyone's job to own innovation.
• 15:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: So sitting down with my boss, the CFO, and the CEO at the time,
• 15:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: we said, how do we embed this as a cultural aspect within the company?
• 15:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we created this entire training curriculum, and we
• 15:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: identified people within the business, within tech, and paired them up.
• 15:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: So you'd work a marketing person might work with somebody over in sales.
• 15:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: A finance person with somebody over in tech.
• 15:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, people that usually maybe don't work together as close as Right.
• 15:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: Paired them up.
• 15:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: They went through the training program.
• 15:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we taught them all of these different techniques for innovation,
• 15:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: lean principles, for example.
• 15:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 15:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and then we had them identify a problem within the
• 16:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: organization that they felt passionate about solving in a different way.
• 16:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it could be as simple as a small little broken process somewhere, or
• 16:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: it could be a whole new product for the business.
• 16:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and then we have them go through, like, a shark tank, like, initiative.
• 16:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so we sat down on a panel just like the sharks do at
• 16:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: shark on Shark Tank, and they came and presented.
• 16:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: They had a certain amount of time to present their idea and why we
• 16:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: should invest in them, and we either gave them money or told them to
• 16:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: get off the stage.
• 16:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 16:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so then we would fund their idea, and then they could go and
• 16:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: take it to the next level.
• 16:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so it just created a lot of momentum in the organization.
• 16:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: We did, like, three cohorts of that, and and they created videos and publicized
• 16:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: it throughout the company, and it just really created a really fun culture at
• 16:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: the time.
• 16:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: I don't know if they're still doing it anymore.
• 16:45
  Lisa Nichols: Hopefully, they are.
• 16:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: It was so fun.
• 16:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: It really allowed, you know, all of us to tap our right side of
• 16:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: our brains that we don't get to use a lot.
• 16:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 16:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, and and then partner with folks and build new relationships.
• 16:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: It just had so many arms to it.
• 16:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: It was it was amazing.
• 17:00
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 17:01
  Lisa Nichols: That is that's really cool.
• 17:02
  Lisa Nichols: And I love it.
• 17:03
  Lisa Nichols: And I mean, is there, like, one product or one service
• 17:07
  Lisa Nichols: idea that came out that really stuck out to you?
• 17:10
  Lisa Nichols: Can you remember one of those?
• 17:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Not off the top of my head.
• 17:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, there was a lot of just, like, operational inefficiencies that people were
• 17:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: trying to find a a new solution for.
• 17:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: So it was a lot of, you know, just we were getting people down
• 17:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: in the trenches.
• 17:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: We they had to be director level or below.
• 17:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: We didn't want VPs in there.
• 17:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: So these are people that are hands on.
• 17:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: They're within their area of the business.
• 17:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: They know where the challenges are.
• 17:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: They know the things they hate doing every day.
• 17:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: And this was their opportunity to say, hey.
• 17:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: I can scratch the sitch finally.
• 17:38
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 17:39
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 17:39
  Lisa Nichols: You're a stronger organization because of it.
• 17:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oh, hundred percent.
• 17:43
  Lisa Nichols: So and then people when they have a voice and they have,
• 17:47
  Lisa Nichols: you know, their voices
• 17:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: platform we created for them.
• 17:50
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 17:51
  Lisa Nichols: It's amazing.
• 17:51
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 17:52
  Lisa Nichols: It's amazing.
• 17:52
  Lisa Nichols: Even if
• 17:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: they didn't get funded, the process taught them so much, and it was so
• 17:56
  Lisa Nichols: Absolutely.
• 17:57
  Lisa Nichols: And the and the relationship's forming between the different function areas
• 18:01
  Lisa Nichols: as well.
• 18:02
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 18:02
  Lisa Nichols: So oh, I just I love that idea.
• 18:05
  Lisa Nichols: So, you know, right now, Bryan, every
• 18:09
  Lisa Nichols: CIO, every business I talk to, AI is,
• 18:13
  Lisa Nichols: you know, transforming things.
• 18:15
  Lisa Nichols: What excites you most about that?
• 18:18
  Lisa Nichols: And I guess the converse of that is what concerns you most.
• 18:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oh, wow.
• 18:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 18:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: So, I mean, one, it's moving so fast.
• 18:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's every day is something new.
• 18:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: What excites me most is the the the things we can do as individuals
• 18:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: by ourselves now so much better and faster.
• 18:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, if I have a strategic proposal I wanna create, I have all
• 18:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: these ideas in my head, I need to get them on paper, I can
• 18:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: just riff with AI for a little while, and and it'll it'll help me
• 18:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: clarify clarify my thoughts, help me draft my presentation, whatever I need to do.
• 18:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I'm not spending time on the the paper that I'm creating.
• 18:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'm creating the it's the content.
• 18:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's the it's the context.
• 18:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's all of that stuff that's coming out of me.
• 18:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I can focus on that and not the Yes.
• 19:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Of it.
• 19:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 19:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right.
• 19:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: Creativity we're seeing within organizations.
• 19:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, we have everyone from our CEO down at our company right now
• 19:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: is using AI, and they're coming up with other types of ideas that they
• 19:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: have.
• 19:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Hey.
• 19:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: I wanna see a mobile app that looks like this.
• 19:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: I wanna revise our website to look like this.
• 19:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: Let's create a customer portal that looks like this.
• 19:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: And they can just go to town and riff with it, and now you
• 19:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: got something to react to and talk about versus, like, hey.
• 19:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: I have an idea.
• 19:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'm trying to explain it to you and you don't quite understand it.
• 19:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think there's just so much power in the creativity aspect of it.
• 19:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would say the challenges on the other side of that is it's
• 19:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: doing so much work for us that if we're not careful, we're gonna rely
• 19:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: on it too much.
• 19:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: And there's this worry I have is that you're gonna dumb us down to
• 19:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: where it's like, okay.
• 19:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's another AI creative presentation by Bob.
• 19:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 19:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, or whatever.
• 19:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: And Yeah.
• 19:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: Is it really his thoughts and content or is it AI's?
• 19:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 19:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Even if he helped or she helped or whatever create that content,
• 19:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: you're gonna start having this merging of the two in some Yeah.
• 20:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: Shape or form.
• 20:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think that's that's the caveat to it.
• 20:06
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 20:06
  Lisa Nichols: I agree.
• 20:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I think, you know, you're seeing a lot of this in in the
• 20:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: editorial world right now.
• 20:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: They're putting a lot of these stop checks on on editorial to see how
• 20:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: much is AI generated on Substack, for example.
• 20:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 20:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: And flagging it as such.
• 20:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: And these tools that can hopefully and their AI tools detecting whether or not
• 20:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: AI is used, which is kind of a funny oxymoron there in itself.
• 20:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: But, you know, that's starting to become a thing.
• 20:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: But is it negative or positive?
• 20:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: I don't know if it's one or the the other.
• 20:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think it's great for the transparency.
• 20:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: I wanna know if I'm being fed something that hasn't been informed at all
• 20:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: by Sure.
• 20:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: But I think it's it's an enable.
• 20:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, I think, like, the bionic man.
• 20:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 20:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: You're my age.
• 20:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: You remember the six million dollar man.
• 20:44
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 20:44
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 20:44
  Lisa Nichols: I do.
• 20:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: Six million dollars is nothing nowadays for a bionic man.
• 20:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: But, you know, it made him better, but it it was an augmentation
• 20:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: of him.
• 20:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 20:54
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 20:54
  Lisa Nichols: That's
• 20:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: what AI should be
• 20:55
  Lisa Nichols: It's an augmentation tool.
• 20:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's something that hopefully make us better if we use it right.
• 21:00
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 21:01
  Lisa Nichols: So I
• 21:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: think there's a lot of hope for it.
• 21:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think there is there is a there is some concerns about what it
• 21:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: can do from a security aspect.
• 21:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 21:08
  Lisa Nichols: You know, with
• 21:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: the power of it, you already heard about, you know, anthropics, one going rogue
• 21:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: and hacking into companies and doing some some crazy stuff.
• 21:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: And that's probably just the the part that they share with us of what
• 21:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: it can do.
• 21:18
  Lisa Nichols: That's right.
• 21:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's the
• 21:20
  Lisa Nichols: part we hear.
• 21:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: There's powerful models out there that can do a lot more than that.
• 21:23
  Lisa Nichols: I think there's
• 21:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: I I think it comes with that that responsibility that we as humans need
• 21:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: to be conscious of as part of
• 21:30
  Lisa Nichols: this nature.
• 21:30
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 21:31
  Lisa Nichols: That's why human beings still need to be part of the equation.
• 21:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's right.
• 21:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: A hundred percent.
• 21:35
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 21:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 21:35
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 21:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 21:36
  Lisa Nichols: Well, Bryan, I've got a lot more to talk to you about, but we
• 21:38
  Lisa Nichols: do need to take a quick break, and we'll be right back with Bryan
• 21:41
  Lisa Nichols: Muehlberger on the Something Extra podcast.
• 21:44
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• 22:13
  Lisa Nichols: Welcome back, everyone, to the Something Extra podcast with my friend, Bryan.
• 22:18
  Lisa Nichols: Bryan, in twenty nineteen,
• 22:21
  Lisa Nichols: you and I have talked about this.
• 22:22
  Lisa Nichols: Your family's life was changed forever with the loss of your
• 22:26
  Lisa Nichols: precious, precious daughter, Gracie Anne.
• 22:30
  Lisa Nichols: And I asked you beforehand, is this okay to talk about?
• 22:33
  Lisa Nichols: And you said it absolutely is because it's part of who you are.
• 22:36
  Lisa Nichols: That's right.
• 22:37
  Lisa Nichols: It shaped how you do things.
• 22:39
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 22:39
  Lisa Nichols: Can you tell me a little bit about how that shaped you?
• 22:42
  Lisa Nichols: I don't know if you want to tell any part of her story.
• 22:45
  Lisa Nichols: I'll let you I'll let you decide what you wanna share.
• 22:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 22:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, I could talk for hours about it.
• 22:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 22:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, Gracie was our only daughter.
• 22:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: She was our youngest child.
• 22:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: We had two boys, Riley and Brady, and we had Gracie, and they're all
• 22:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: two years apart or so.
• 22:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: But she was, unfortunately, killed in a school shooting, mass shooting at
• 23:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: her school in Santa Clarita, California on November fourteenth two thousand nineteen.
• 23:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it it's it's a day that forever changes your life.
• 23:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, my wife was in an ACL surgery at the time, when I
• 23:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: get the text from my son, Brady, who's a junior at the high school
• 23:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: stating that the school is under lockdown and one thing led to the next.
• 23:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: Before she even got out of surgery, I was already at the hospital, you
• 23:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: know, dealing with dealing with the outcomes.
• 23:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, you know, the the sense of loss and grief
• 23:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: is is so intense and so deep.
• 23:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: The words don't even do it justice.
• 23:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: I you know, I've been writing a memoir, narrative memoir on this whole topic,
• 23:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: and and you just can't find the words to describe the depth of
• 23:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: that grief.
• 23:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 23:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it's and it's something that you get better at living with,
• 23:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: but it's always there.
• 23:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: And
• 23:54
  Lisa Nichols: so always there.
• 23:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so I remember seeing a photo that was taken.
• 23:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: We didn't see Gracie for four days,
• 24:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: not even the day of.
• 24:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: So they wouldn't let us see her.
• 24:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: They said she was evidence.
• 24:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's a whole another story for another day.
• 24:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: We got to see her fry finally on fry on Monday evening.
• 24:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: So it happened on a Thursday, not till Monday evening.
• 24:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: And we went out to a to a Mexican restaurant that evening with some
• 24:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: family and some friends, and there's a picture of us.
• 24:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: And we're all sitting at this table.
• 24:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: We got margaritas in front of us, and we have smiles on our face.
• 24:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: We look like we've been laughing.
• 24:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: Probably maybe one too many margaritas.
• 24:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'm not quite sure.
• 24:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: And you look at it going, how can you be smiling four days after
• 24:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: a tragedy like that?
• 24:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it was actually a a moment of a sense of relief at that
• 24:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: moment in time because we finally just we finally got to see her.
• 24:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yes.
• 24:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, we got some closure on some things with that that moment.
• 24:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: And
• 24:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: but it was still there.
• 24:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: So if you saw the photo, you wouldn't see that depth of that grief
• 24:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: that's that's really right below the surface at that moment in life.
• 25:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 25:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: But as time goes on, you know, that I always use this this analogy.
• 25:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: Grief is like a black ball.
• 25:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 25:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: And when when that moment occurs in your life, and everyone will experience some
• 25:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: sort of of horrible loss in their life, unfortunately, we all will.
• 25:16
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 25:16
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 25:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's all consuming.
• 25:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: That black ball is is your entire world.
• 25:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: And maybe for that one second, that smile on our faces that day was
• 25:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: just that surface level of that black ball.
• 25:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: Over time, that black ball never shrinks.
• 25:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: It stays the same size.
• 25:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: It doesn't get any bigger.
• 25:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's just because it's as big as it can get, at that moment.
• 25:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: But you you learn to add new experiences and new life around
• 25:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: it.
• 25:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so as that builds around it, you almost get, like, this protective barrier
• 25:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: to that grief.
• 25:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and that allows you to live outward in in a positive way,
• 25:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: though that grief is still there at all times.
• 25:54
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 25:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Never goes away.
• 25:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: So with that said, I would say, you know, we leaned into people.
• 26:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: We I mean, I can't even describe the amount
• 26:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: of outpouring of love and compassion that we received.
• 26:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: The tragedy was very public.
• 26:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 26:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: It was national news, global news in many aspects.
• 26:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: We had, you know, a lot of opportunities to get in front of the
• 26:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: camera at that time, which was very uncomfortable when you're grieving.
• 26:24
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 26:25
  Lisa Nichols: But
• 26:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: we also knew we had to put our our daughter's face and and personality
• 26:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: out there.
• 26:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: We wanted people to know who she was.
• 26:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and through all of that, like, just the outpouring in our community was
• 26:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: just mind blowing.
• 26:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 26:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: We had this we had a vigil,
• 26:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: three days later on that Sunday evening at our local park, Central
• 26:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: Park, in Santa Clarita, and over twenty thousand people showed up.
• 26:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 26:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: They've never had that many people in the park.
• 26:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: They do concerts in this park all the time and things like that.
• 26:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it was, like, you know, street parking only.
• 26:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: People were the overflows were going to the local churches.
• 26:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: They were streaming online.
• 26:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, everyone there holding white and blue, white six, and so forth
• 27:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: for us.
• 27:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and and it just kinda continued, in that.
• 27:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, we have you know, I could just go on and on about
• 27:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: all the things that somebody did for us in some way.
• 27:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: We got these beautiful obelisks made.
• 27:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: We funded the actual construction of them, but we got the city to allow
• 27:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: them us to put them in that central park because that was the meeting
• 27:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: place where all the kids reunited with their families.
• 27:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: Unfortunately, we never got to reunite with our kids.
• 27:27
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 27:28
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 27:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I say our kids because there was another little boy who also lost
• 27:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: his life, Dominic Blackwell.
• 27:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so they put up these beautiful obelisks.
• 27:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: They have this whole section.
• 27:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: They're lit up at night.
• 27:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: These and they they're all a mosaic tile that we had this mosaic artist
• 27:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: create with all their personality all over these these obelisks.
• 27:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: So all four sides of them have, you know, like on Gracie's, it's a
• 27:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: picture of the Saint Louis Cardinals.
• 27:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's a picture of her dog.
• 27:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's a Starbucks caramel frappuccino.
• 27:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's it's music notes because she loved music.
• 27:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's a microphone because she loved to sing.
• 27:56
  Lisa Nichols: To sing.
• 27:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 27:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 27:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so it's all that on Dominic's.
• 28:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: It's like his football stuff and his ROTC stuff and just everything about
• 28:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: his life.
• 28:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: But to that was kind of an act of God in many ways.
• 28:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, we had to fight with city hall.
• 28:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: We had to fight with the water water company there because they own the
• 28:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: land and rent it back to the city for the park.
• 28:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 28:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: There was all these complex things.
• 28:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'd never dealt with city politics, but they all worked
• 28:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: with us.
• 28:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: The mayor at the time was very, very fortunate to have him at the
• 28:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: time work with us to work through this problem and got it got it
• 28:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: across the finish line.
• 28:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then, you know, we we've, recently, we we
• 28:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: participated in a in a documentary film.
• 28:35
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 28:36
  Lisa Nichols: Tell our listeners about this film.
• 28:37
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 28:37
  Lisa Nichols: It's All the empty words.
• 28:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: Started off as a as a reach out by by CBS correspondent Steve Hartman.
• 28:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: So Steve Hartman Yes.
• 28:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: The feel good guy at the end of the week.
• 28:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, usually usually Sundays, you know, it's it's Steve Hartman talking about the
• 28:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: good story and the tragedies or bad things that have occurred that week, and
• 28:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: it makes you feel good.
• 28:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Well, he had been covering school shootings for a while, always trying to find
• 28:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: the hero in the story, the good, you know, and things like that.
• 29:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: And he's just like, I I just can't keep doing this anymore.
• 29:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: I gotta do something different.
• 29:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: So he had this idea of how can I bring people, all
• 29:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: of America, into the rooms of these kids that have been lost in these
• 29:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: school shootings?
• 29:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: And he's like, if we could just do that, we could be a different
• 29:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: America.
• 29:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: So
• 29:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: he reached out.
• 29:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: We got this FedEx envelope with a letter in it, from Steve Hartman saying,
• 29:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: hey.
• 29:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: I like I got this idea.
• 29:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: We'd like to film your child's room.
• 29:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 29:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: And me and Cindy were like, I don't know.
• 29:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, we've done enough of this stuff.
• 29:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: We're sick of being in front of the camera.
• 29:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, can we just not do anything anymore?
• 29:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, and we just kinda prayed on it, and we felt you know, after
• 29:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: speaking to Steve, we're like, okay.
• 29:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: This he's a good guy.
• 29:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: Let's, like, move forward with this.
• 29:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: Let's see how it goes.
• 29:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we kinda started going down the path, and we introduced him to the
• 29:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: Blackwells.
• 29:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Dominic's room was actually in intact as well.
• 29:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, he's a big SpongeBob kid, you know, and so forth.
• 29:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so that kinda sticks out in the film.
• 29:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: But he came out.
• 29:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: They filmed our filmed the room in excruciating detail, videos and pictures.
• 30:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: And Lou Bope, who is the photographer and videographer for all of this, just
• 30:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: created this this collage of the personality of these kids.
• 30:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: And at the time, we had been ever since the tragedy, I would say,
• 30:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: we've been wanting to get out of California at that time.
• 30:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 30:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: And but we didn't know what to do with Gracie's room.
• 30:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so this whole time, we're just going, what do we do?
• 30:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 30:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it's like Cindy's like, I'm not ready.
• 30:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 30:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: She would open the door every morning.
• 30:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: Good morning, baby girl.
• 30:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: That night, good night, baby girl.
• 30:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 30:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: And you just got this empty room that used to be so full of
• 30:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: life.
• 30:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, and after doing this film, we kinda felt this sense of peace.
• 30:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, you know, we've documented this.
• 30:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, we got a great record that she was here.
• 30:40
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 30:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, so we went through that process, and then, know, they started getting calls
• 30:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: for the film festival.
• 30:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: They started sending it out to folks for the film festivals and so forth.
• 30:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: So, like, Tribeca called them back and said, we wanna have you guys at
• 30:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: the film festival.
• 30:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, you know, all these film festivals started really giving it great accolades.
• 30:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then they started getting reached out by the different streaming companies, and eventually
• 31:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: Netflix purchased the film.
• 31:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: So they purchased the film.
• 31:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: It started airing on Netflix on December first of last year.
• 31:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: Then it got shortlisted for
• 31:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: the, Academy Awards for the Oscars, and so it was one of, like, seventeen
• 31:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: films in this quote, unquote shortlist out of a thousand, something like that.
• 31:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then also we're like, oh my gosh.
• 31:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: This is, like, really going way farther than we ever thought.
• 31:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then, in January, we're watching the livestream of the Oscar
• 31:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: nominees, and it's the next one that they announced.
• 31:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we get we're now now in the top five of nominees for an
• 31:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oscar.
• 31:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: So just being an Oscar nominated film is always a is a is a
• 31:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: is a accolades.
• 31:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 31:38
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 31:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we're like, we won already.
• 31:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 31:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: But we just felt like like, we're going all the way.
• 31:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: So and we did.
• 31:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so in March, we go out to the Oscars to to watch
• 31:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: it live, And, we're sitting up in our seats and waiting for the
• 31:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: announcement, and then, Jimmy Kimmel comes out and, you know, gives the announcements.
• 32:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: And right when he says, and the Oscar goes to, and he has all
• 32:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: I had to say was all the, and then we
• 32:05
  Lisa Nichols: lost it.
• 32:06
  Lisa Nichols: All the empty rooms.
• 32:07
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 32:07
  Lisa Nichols: Wow.
• 32:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: So yeah.
• 32:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: So,
• 32:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: she's got a she's got an IMDB profile.
• 32:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: She's in an Oscar winning film.
• 32:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, I I don't know.
• 32:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: Gotcha.
• 32:16
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 32:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 32:17
  Lisa Nichols: And she was a performer.
• 32:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: I know.
• 32:19
  Lisa Nichols: You know?
• 32:19
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, Bryan, I mean, I think she want you know?
• 32:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: I always say be careful what you ask God for.
• 32:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: You never know how he's gonna deliver it to you.
• 32:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: I think she always wanted to be famous and and on film.
• 32:30
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 32:31
  Lisa Nichols: I
• 32:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: don't think she ever envisioned this, but I think because of this, she's touched
• 32:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: more lives than she could have otherwise.
• 32:37
  Lisa Nichols: Absolutely.
• 32:38
  Lisa Nichols: So Yeah.
• 32:39
  Lisa Nichols: We
• 32:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: just love that she's out there, and people get to see Yeah.
• 32:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: Personality and who she is.
• 32:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: And
• 32:44
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 32:44
  Lisa Nichols: Because she had a big personality.
• 32:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: Oh, huge.
• 32:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 32:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 32:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 32:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 32:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: I miss it quite a bit.
• 32:50
  Lisa Nichols: Well, you know, so how has
• 32:54
  Lisa Nichols: going through what you've gone through and that grief, what has it taught you
• 32:58
  Lisa Nichols: about leadership?
• 32:59
  Lisa Nichols: I'm sure it's taught you a lot about leadership.
• 33:02
  Lisa Nichols: I'm sure it's taught you a lot about relationships, Bryan.
• 33:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: I will say, like, you know, when this all occurred, you know, I was
• 33:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: the CIO for the Beachbody company at the time.
• 33:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 33:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: Busy role.
• 33:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: We were growing like crazy at the time, and my life was on
• 33:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: fire every day.
• 33:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and this occurs and life just stops.
• 33:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: And the company, that's when you realize, like, the true
• 33:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: nature of a company is in a moment like this.
• 33:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: They could have easily said, hey.
• 33:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: You're going on short term disability.
• 33:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 33:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: We're gonna pay you a portion of your paycheck.
• 33:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: They never stopped my paychecks for three and a half months.
• 33:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: Paycheck came every two weeks, hundred percent.
• 33:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: They catered Thanksgiving.
• 33:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: They catered Christmas to our house.
• 33:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: They, never pressured me to come back.
• 33:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: In fact, I was the one pressuring myself.
• 33:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: I'm like, I gotta get back.
• 33:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 33:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: And they were always just so supportive.
• 33:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, the head of HR
• 33:52
  Lisa Nichols: at the
• 33:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: time just, you know, poured her heart into it.
• 33:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Our head of legal helped me navigate some of the stuff related to PR
• 33:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: and things like that, you know, having to be in front of a camera,
• 34:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: which I hadn't expected before experienced before, and just everything
• 34:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: there.
• 34:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I would say what I learned through that is, you know, there are
• 34:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: people on your teams every single day dealing with something.
• 34:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 34:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 34:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: Maybe not as public.
• 34:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 34:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: But if you notice that something's different, maybe start there.
• 34:19
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, maybe there's something going on that you're not aware of.
• 34:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: Maybe it's not just their so they they hate your company and they're being,
• 34:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: you know, low performers.
• 34:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: It could be, like, they maybe have some big stuff going on.
• 34:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: Sure.
• 34:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: And when you really get to know people and ask questions on on a
• 34:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: human level, you find out some amazing stuff, about what they're dealing
• 34:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: with.
• 34:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 34:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 34:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: I I I do these dinners, CXO rise dinners, and I bring these executives
• 34:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: together and, you know, everyone's I'm the CIO and CTO of x y z
• 34:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: company.
• 34:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: But at the end of the day, they're all humans, and they're all dealing
• 34:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: with something.
• 34:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and as I've got to know these big powerful leaders,
• 34:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: you know, they're they're they're dealing with child children issues.
• 34:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 34:55
  Bryan Muehlberger: Their child's, you know, hurting themselves.
• 34:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: They're they've got, you know, a no relationship with their wife because they're busy
• 35:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: with work all the time.
• 35:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: And they're dealing with all of these things, yet they're performing still.
• 35:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so, I always just say, like, there's more more complex people.
• 35:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: There's more behind the scenes, and and remember that as a as a leader
• 35:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: for sure.
• 35:13
  Lisa Nichols: As a leader.
• 35:14
  Lisa Nichols: No.
• 35:14
  Lisa Nichols: That's really good.
• 35:18
  Lisa Nichols: What you know, I this I know that there are people
• 35:22
  Lisa Nichols: that are gonna be listening to this, Bryan, and they're carrying really heavy loads.
• 35:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 35:26
  Lisa Nichols: They're carrying really heavy stuff just like what you said, and we don't we
• 35:29
  Lisa Nichols: don't see that always.
• 35:31
  Lisa Nichols: Right?
• 35:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 35:33
  Lisa Nichols: But if somebody is feeling like they are just, like,
• 35:37
  Lisa Nichols: drowning there, I mean, what can you give them
• 35:42
  Lisa Nichols: one piece of advice, one piece of hope to help them
• 35:46
  Lisa Nichols: feel like they can take that next step forward?
• 35:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would you're not alone.
• 35:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean, I think that's the the thing you feel the most.
• 35:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, we still say, like, why us?
• 35:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: Why did this occur to us?
• 35:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 35:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: What did we deserve to get this?
• 36:00
  Bryan Muehlberger: And you feel very alone.
• 36:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and especially during the initial moments of any sort of tragic
• 36:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: situation and traumatic situation in your life, you feel very alone.
• 36:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: But you're not the first person to go through this, whatever that is.
• 36:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: And to know you're not alone, I think, is a good good starting point.
• 36:16
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then and the second part is because you're not alone, reach out to
• 36:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: somebody.
• 36:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 36:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, your friends always say, hey.
• 36:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: If you ever need something, just give me a call.
• 36:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 36:26
  Lisa Nichols: Yes.
• 36:26
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I think they they all mean it.
• 36:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: You gotta take them up on it.
• 36:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 36:30
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 36:31
  Lisa Nichols: Right.
• 36:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: Be bold enough to say, you know, I'm gonna call my friend who said
• 36:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: I can call my friend.
• 36:35
  Lisa Nichols: I need help.
• 36:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 36:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yes.
• 36:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 36:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: Hundred percent.
• 36:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, and take advantage of that.
• 36:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: People want to help others.
• 36:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: We're naturally wired to to rise up and help others.
• 36:44
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and if you give people the chance, they're going to.
• 36:47
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 36:47
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 36:47
  Lisa Nichols: I agree.
• 36:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 36:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: I would say that.
• 36:49
  Lisa Nichols: That's good.
• 36:50
  Lisa Nichols: Well, I know that you and Cindy founded Gracie Strong.
• 36:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 36:54
  Lisa Nichols: Tell us a little bit about Gracie Strong.
• 36:57
  Lisa Nichols: I mean, you guys have created something really beautiful, like I said, out of
• 37:01
  Lisa Nichols: this unimaginable pain.
• 37:03
  Lisa Nichols: But, tell us about Gracie Strong.
• 37:05
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 37:06
  Bryan Muehlberger: So we started Gracie Strong, initially as
• 37:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: an organization to just honor our daughter.
• 37:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: And, you know, it seems like the thing to do you know, I'm being
• 37:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: just transparent.
• 37:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, the thing to do when you someone dies in your family, you you
• 37:20
  Bryan Muehlberger: create a foundation.
• 37:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: That was kinda maybe the initial thought of it.
• 37:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, how do we put something about her out there?
• 37:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: And then as we evolved and really said, well, how do we make this,
• 37:30
  Bryan Muehlberger: like, more about her?
• 37:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: We just realized, like, as we reflected on who she is as
• 37:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: a girl, she was never afraid to, like, speak up.
• 37:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: She was never afraid to to share her thoughts to us, to others, or
• 37:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: stand up for others.
• 37:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so we kinda leaned into this whole, you know, having a strong voice.
• 37:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: We we create a little campaign at one point where we had these bracelets
• 37:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: made called speak TF up, which meant speak the f up.
• 37:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and it really came down to we're like, you know, why didn't anyone
• 38:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: speak the f up about this other child who was hurting that end up
• 38:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: causing this tragedy and ruining so many lives?
• 38:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and when you look back behind the scenes, you can see all of
• 38:10
  Bryan Muehlberger: the pain this child was experiencing and nobody was helping him.
• 38:13
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 38:14
  Lisa Nichols: Nobody noticed.
• 38:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: Nobody noticed.
• 38:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: And if they noticed, they ignored, which is even worse.
• 38:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 38:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: They noticed it, but they just said, not my problem.
• 38:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 38:22
  Bryan Muehlberger: And so we were kinda like, you know, like, how can we do more
• 38:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: of that?
• 38:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: How can we make people more aware of that?
• 38:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and since then, we've evolved a little bit more.
• 38:29
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, we we felt like Gracie got so much out of going to
• 38:33
  Bryan Muehlberger: her church youth camp.
• 38:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: They went to Lake Hume, which was sponsored by our church.
• 38:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: And and we've got some some journals she wrote during those times when she
• 38:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: was off the beaten path and no phone in her hand and had a
• 38:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: pen and paper in her hand.
• 38:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: That's all she had.
• 38:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: And what she wrote was powerful.
• 38:48
  Bryan Muehlberger: And we just thought, like, you know, she she was definitely talking to God.
• 38:52
  Bryan Muehlberger: She felt God in her life, and she knew where she was going.
• 38:56
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 38:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: And we just were like, gosh.
• 38:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know?
• 38:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, if we could get more kids go to youth camps, right, church youth
• 39:01
  Bryan Muehlberger: camps Yes.
• 39:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: Like, how much would that help?
• 39:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: I mean Yes.
• 39:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: We ended up fostering a daughter, for about a year and a half before
• 39:07
  Bryan Muehlberger: we left California.
• 39:09
  Bryan Muehlberger: And through that process, she started going to some some youth groups
• 39:13
  Bryan Muehlberger: and so forth.
• 39:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: And just the amount of camaraderie and support kids receive
• 39:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: from like minded folks who also had this deep Christian faith behind them,
• 39:23
  Bryan Muehlberger: is just so powerful.
• 39:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: And it's transformed her life.
• 39:25
  Bryan Muehlberger: It transformed our daughter's life.
• 39:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: So right now, whenever we, you know, wanna fund something, we tend to try
• 39:31
  Bryan Muehlberger: to fund our local church and help kids go to youth camp that maybe
• 39:34
  Bryan Muehlberger: can't afford it themselves.
• 39:35
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 39:36
  Lisa Nichols: Mhmm.
• 39:37
  Lisa Nichols: I love that.
• 39:38
  Lisa Nichols: Well, yeah, she did journal a lot.
• 39:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 39:40
  Lisa Nichols: And I know one of the things that she had journaled, you actually
• 39:44
  Lisa Nichols: have something permanent, I think, on your arm.
• 39:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: I do.
• 39:47
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yeah.
• 39:47
  Lisa Nichols: You tattooed it.
• 39:48
  Lisa Nichols: What what was that?
• 39:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: She she wrote in her journal, well, she wrote a journal entry,
• 39:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: and I've actually got it right over here.
• 39:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: And she had these four little notes.
• 39:58
  Bryan Muehlberger: So inside this little trinket box right here is is four little
• 40:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: notes.
• 40:02
  Bryan Muehlberger: And you've probably seen this if you watched the film.
• 40:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: This is in the film, first day of high school right there.
• 40:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: So these she had a journal that she was writing in at the same
• 40:12
  Bryan Muehlberger: time she wrote these notes to herself.
• 40:14
  Bryan Muehlberger: So she thought it'd be really cool if I wrote four notes to my
• 40:17
  Bryan Muehlberger: future self.
• 40:18
  Bryan Muehlberger: And she wrote one about graduating eighth grade, one about starting high school, one
• 40:21
  Bryan Muehlberger: about driving a car, and one about going to college.
• 40:24
  Bryan Muehlberger: She got to complete two of those, but she didn't get to complete the
• 40:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: other two.
• 40:28
  Bryan Muehlberger: But in that journal post that she wrote, she she wrote, you only have
• 40:32
  Bryan Muehlberger: one life to live, so why not live a great, real, and fill it
• 40:35
  Bryan Muehlberger: with memories and experiences?
• 40:36
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I was like, if that isn't a message, I don't know what is.
• 40:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: Right?
• 40:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: True.
• 40:41
  Bryan Muehlberger: So I said, I'm I'm putting that on my arm.
• 40:43
  Bryan Muehlberger: So that became the starting point of a I have a whole arm sleeve
• 40:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: tattoo now with lots of my life in it, and that's that's an anchor
• 40:49
  Bryan Muehlberger: piece to it.
• 40:50
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 40:51
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 40:51
  Bryan Muehlberger: Her mantra for our life.
• 40:53
  Bryan Muehlberger: And
• 40:53
  Lisa Nichols: so Love it.
• 40:54
  Lisa Nichols: As we The great mantra.
• 40:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 40:56
  Bryan Muehlberger: Yep.
• 40:57
  Lisa Nichols: The great mantra.
• 40:58
  Lisa Nichols: Oh my goodness.
• 40:59
  Lisa Nichols: Well, I, just appreciate so much you being vulnerable
• 41:03
  Lisa Nichols: and sharing your story.
• 41:05
  Lisa Nichols: Bryan, and I know it's gonna help somebody because, like you said, every person's
• 41:09
  Lisa Nichols: walking through something.
• 41:10
  Lisa Nichols: We don't always see it.
• 41:11
  Lisa Nichols: But, just seeing how you and Cindy have taken this
• 41:17
  Lisa Nichols: unimaginable tragedy and, really honored
• 41:21
  Lisa Nichols: Gracie Anne's life with the things that you've done.
• 41:23
  Lisa Nichols: I think I I just know it's inspired me.
• 41:26
  Lisa Nichols: So
• 41:27
  Bryan Muehlberger: Thank you.
• 41:28
  Lisa Nichols: Everyone that is on the podcast, I asked them this question.
• 41:33
  Lisa Nichols: What do you believe?
• 41:34
  Lisa Nichols: Is this something extra that every leader needs?
• 41:38
  Lisa Nichols: So I would love for you to answer that question, Bryan.
• 41:42
  Bryan Muehlberger: Faith.
• 41:44
  Lisa Nichols: Amen.
• 41:45
  Bryan Muehlberger: I just honestly believe that.
• 41:46
  Bryan Muehlberger: You know, I've I've I had a really strong faith when I was younger
• 41:50
  Bryan Muehlberger: and into my young adulthood and even into the time we were raising our
• 41:54
  Bryan Muehlberger: children, and then and then this tragedy occurred in my life.
• 41:57
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I lost my way for a while.
• 41:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: Mhmm.
• 41:59
  Lisa Nichols: I
• 41:59
  Bryan Muehlberger: was angry at God, but I would say he also continued to guide me
• 42:03
  Bryan Muehlberger: through that entire process.
• 42:04
  Bryan Muehlberger: And as I look back, I kinda realize all the blessings I was receiving
• 42:08
  Bryan Muehlberger: during all of that and and that in some way, shape, or form that
• 42:11
  Bryan Muehlberger: I don't quite understand yet, there is there is good in in all
• 42:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: of this.
• 42:15
  Bryan Muehlberger: And I would say, you know, you gotta have that faith.
• 42:18
  Lisa Nichols: Yeah.
• 42:19
  Lisa Nichols: That is so good.
• 42:20
  Lisa Nichols: Well, thank you so much.
• 42:21
  Lisa Nichols: I know how busy you are, especially taking on this brand new role.
• 42:25
  Lisa Nichols: I'm hoping that on one of my trips to Nashville, it will work out
• 42:28
  Lisa Nichols: where you're there, and we can see each other in person.
• 42:31
  Lisa Nichols: And yeah.
• 42:32
  Lisa Nichols: But thanks so much for being on the show.
• 42:34
  Lisa Nichols: I really do appreciate appreciate your time.
• 42:37
  Bryan Muehlberger: You too, Lisa.
• 42:38
  Bryan Muehlberger: Good seeing you.
• 42:38
  Lisa Nichols: Take care, my friend.
• 42:39
  Bryan Muehlberger: Alright.
• 42:40
  Bryan Muehlberger: Bye bye.
• 42:40
  Lisa Nichols: Bye bye.
• 42:41
  Announcer: Something extra with Lisa Nichols is a Technology Partners production.
• 42:45
  Announcer: Copyright Technology Partners Inc twenty nineteen.
• 42:49
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• 42:53
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• 42:55
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• 42:58
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