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Episode 7: Born To Grill · The Tom & Gerry Show Podcast

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Tom, Do you hear that buzz? Do we need some of the citronella?
1:07
Can? This is what you're saying. I'm not saying it's citronella candles.
1:11
But first and foremost, welcome everybody to the Tom and Jerry Show podcast.
1:15
My name is Jeremy Bride, He's Tom. O'manny And if you do
1:18
hear a buzz in there, Tom, like the buzz you heard at the
1:21
start. Ah, that's the drone. The drone. That's the drone,
1:26
buddy, The drone is the drone is outside my window right now. It's
1:30
not delivering into my house, liver into the house up the block, but
1:33
it is in the vicinity here, no way, what yeah, yeah,
1:38
yeah, Oh. Welcome to the future. Welcome to the show, everybody,
1:40
But welcome to the future. There are drone deliveries delivering to Blanchard's town
1:44
now. As a matter of fact, as a matter of no big deal.
1:48
What kind of judge dread fucking utopia slash fucking what's the ship version of
1:53
a utopia dystopian dystopia. What I don't agree with this at all. Well,
1:59
you know what I'm I'm going to tell you, Tom, there's pros
2:00
and cons. We won't have a row about it because we don't row on
2:02
this podcast as people would listen to the course. God, we could have
2:06
probably saved this for stuff away here, Tom. Yeah. No, it'll
2:10
deliver up airway. And it was a novelty at start. Now it's just
2:15
just a matter of course that if you want a burrito or a McDonald's,
2:17
I don't know, actually sorry, a bigger part. I don't think McDonald's
2:21
are delivering from it. But this drone, which is about the size of
2:25
like a fly me. Oh yeah, yeah yeah, and not for nothing,
2:30
sounds like it as well, because to find summer evening out here.
2:32
So if you think you're hearing like if someone mowed a lawn, that's what
2:36
it sounds like, all right, Jesus. And it'll it'll fly from McDonald
2:42
I keep saying McDonald's. Okay, it'll fly from Boushem, or it'll fly
2:45
from wherever, and it will come up and it will hover above your house
2:50
and it will drop your package of food down to you on about forty foot
2:54
a cord and then it snips the cord upstairs, so the cord falls down
2:58
as well, so you get a bit of delivery. Forty four the string,
3:00
Yeah, forty for the good Jude string. And so you're are you
3:07
bullshit? Because I mean a lot of people would go, it's Jerry just
3:09
playing with sex toys or something in the background. If the buzz and starts
3:13
going off, now he's covering it with some not this the worldly bullshit like
3:17
and not not this exact time. I thought they were trialing this, this
3:22
this thing, the trial that was success, and now they just do to
3:23
what end? To what? What are the night of these yokes going?
3:28
Very good question. I don't think I have, although I guess I can,
3:30
but I don't believe I've seen one past nine o'clock, ten o'clock maybe,
3:36
and and and it's eerie like it will fly directly to your house in
3:39
a straight line, and it obeys some sort of flight path, like it'll
3:44
fly and then turn. Hope, I hope it's programmed in and not some
3:47
seven sixteen year old PlayStation wiz is over in Bougium gone thirty two Roxburgh Road.
3:54
Is it here we go? You know? Not myres. It starts
4:00
on tinder or something, and all of a sudden he's for you know,
4:02
there's burrito been fired out up. What Yeah, this I'm troubled by this.
4:08
This is uh. I just I feel I feel like I want to
4:11
say, that's not my address. That's just a mediu dress just in case
4:14
anybody goes to it somewhere. Something that something that I said to them,
4:18
some punk that I roughed up way back, ducks, some strange lads.
4:24
I listen to three Peck over there. The thing of the drone as well,
4:30
Tom is everybody's are like you know people that say like all lads will
4:33
throw stones and hit it on, lads will take that down in a week.
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No, they won't because it never comes within like fifty foot of the
4:41
ground. It hovers way up there and drops it down on fifty foot of
4:44
Jude string. So the best of luck taking it down if you had a
4:49
rifle. Yeah, But like, I'm fairly certain they've done their sums and
4:53
there's not many people going to be hanging out of their windows here and blanket
4:56
and popping caps at a drone. Well counteract that if anybody hears the mooing
5:01
of a fucking cow in the background here because my door is slightly a jar
5:04
because I'm gonna die of heat. It's just a cow, that's It's not
5:11
just some new fangled thing that sounds like although there is a cow, right
5:15
cow delivery system, that'd be amazed, but they already be having in built
5:17
delivery system. What more do you want to deliver you another cow or they
5:21
delivery what else? There's a cow off in the distance, I don't know,
5:27
And once in a while she'll give a moot and she sounds like the
5:31
same. She has the same resonance as the sound of your phone vibrating on
5:35
a wouldn't table right, So it's like it's at the same tone and there
5:43
the same fucking timing, and I'm like, two of us start looking around
5:45
for our phones. And I tried to I tried to record it the other
5:48
day, but whatever it was that I eat, it gave me like an
5:51
upset stomach and those gas and wind chorn, but it kept making the noise
5:59
of your man from carry on, which which one, Yeah, exactly that
6:06
Frankie Howard. No, not Frankie Howard, the weed light fella. He's
6:11
only a skinny fella. Oh yeah, Kenneth, Kenneth Williams. Kenneth Williams,
6:17
Yeah, yeah, yea, yeah, yea, yeah, yah,
6:18
there's I'm just sitting there watching the scene for a while, doing a did
6:21
a good impression of him? Well, yeah, I don't care. We
6:28
might save that for the Rose as well. But yeah, you'd be sitting
6:30
you'd be sitting there, mind your own business, watching TV. And then
6:32
then the stumber were just like, so your stomach cut like nineteen seventies Camp
6:38
is Yeah, yeah, yeah, Camp's stomach carry on bloating. Well any
6:47
rate, any rate? Oh my god, Tom, No, we've mentioned
6:50
the heated couple of times on this podcast. It's we're we're we're rocking and
6:59
rolling. Yeah, we're going to be like going for the way and after
7:00
this, but we're gonna rock and roll anywhere with the show. Heat me
7:03
damned because it is time Tom to talk about the big news of the week.
7:10
We're talking about the brew haha, the Shenanigans, my friend. What
7:14
we have come to call here on this show the weekly what have You?
7:17
This is a very complicated case, mad You know, a lot of ian's,
7:20
a lot of outs, a lot of what have you and a lot
7:24
of strands to keep in my head. Man, this is will come as
7:28
no surprise to long term listeners or people who even know me that, yeah,
7:33
I'm gearing up. There's a certain time of the year I gear up
7:35
for things. You're very good at gearing up for Christmas. You're great man
7:39
for gearing up for Christmas. You have giant tupperware tubs with names written on
7:43
it for lights and different things. You know, I mean, he is
7:46
Clark Griswold. You know what I mean. He's Clark Griswold, only more
7:48
adept than actually putting up lights and stuff. I if there's a Clark Griswold
7:54
of summer barbecuing, I'd like to that's you. That's I'd like. I
7:58
mean, I I look, I see the professional guys. I'm like,
8:01
I'm not those guys. They're unbelievable. But I like to think of myself
8:03
as the umbutsman between your every day Joe and Josephine who likes some charred food
8:09
outside, and those guys who have a twenty five grand smoker, you know,
8:13
well hanging off the back of our truck. Yeah, those guys.
8:18
And given that this is the Tom and Jerry Show, and we can pretty
8:20
much say or do whatever we want because our names are on the Our names
8:24
are above the marquee. There, my friend, we have declared that this
8:28
week to be the official start of Irish barbecue season. You may have smelled
8:33
one or two in the air over the last couple of weeks when we had
8:35
the good weather, But now it seems like the good weather is sticking.
8:39
It's that stick sticking good weather. One hot spot in early May. Don't
8:43
cut it. No, no, no no. The June Bank called,
8:46
they're coming up now very short? Was it this weekend or the following weekend?
8:50
Coming up? Real short? Now is the time to get stuck into
8:56
barbecue season. And Tom, given that I'm a novice and I only know
8:58
about eating barbecue, I'm starting to think maybe I should get a barbecue.
9:03
You should get You're looking, I'm looking at me. I'm not gonna I'm
9:07
a man that likes meat. Given me, I know you've you've had much
9:09
of my meat, Jerry. But what I need, Tom, I need
9:16
to know how to how my meat can be like your meat, Okay,
9:20
so that when I eat it it turns the noises my stomach makes from Kenneth
9:24
Williams to said James, Yeah, hell I did not. I did not
9:33
see the turn happening show for you. So okay, Tom, Okay,
9:39
imagine I don't know nothing about barbecuing. Help me, and by proxy the
9:43
listeners of the Tom and Jerry Show barbecue. Well, this is the perfect
9:46
week to start barbecuing because of the Junie Bank Holid week weekend coming up.
9:50
And you want, like anything, a bit of practice, do you know
9:56
what I mean? You can't be you can't be inviting people over and go.
9:58
I'll give the And I don't care if you have a barbecue already and
10:01
you think yourself a barbecue king or queen every single year. Nah, the
10:05
week prior the week sorry, two weeks prior even to the June Bank holl
10:09
the weekend, be getting on it, be getting on it the bank of
10:13
the weekend at this stage now, so you're still in all prepare, prepare
10:18
like it is. It's it's so that you can you can mess it up.
10:20
You can burn the ship out of it, you know what I mean?
10:22
You can get your salmonella's out of the way. You wanna Now,
10:28
I'm not gonna I'm not gonna poo poop gas people, because there's I swear
10:31
to god anything a Rex ruined everything. Jerry. As soon as I started
10:35
paying attention and posting things about barbecuing, of course, I had the whole
10:39
barbecueber Gate on board, going yeah and Tom those guess, guys, what
10:43
are you talking about? If you want if you just want to cook your
10:46
food, man, that's all I can tell you. So it's up to
10:48
you. The difference being is that gas very little effort, throw your click
10:54
click to click, and it's basically over the burner that you might have in
10:58
the kitchen, the same thing you're grilling, you're kind of toasting. You're
11:01
not really charing, you know, that kind of way. But right,
11:05
so Interior I could do. Interior. I already have a gas barbecue in
11:09
my kitchen. It's just not outside. Here's the thing. Your toaster is
11:13
kind of a barbecue if you turn it on its side. Do you know
11:15
what I mean? You know what I mean? At that stage, that's
11:18
what you're dealing with. So let's gas conversation. Is saving me hundreds of
11:22
euros, hundreds and hundreds of euros. But look, I would say,
11:26
in the long run, and it's a hard pill to swallow for a lot
11:28
of people, because we all get roped into the middle aisles of certain shops
11:33
and whatnot, and there's things in front of us. Or you end up
11:35
in a home store or one of these things. You go, sure,
11:37
look at it's seventy euro. I guarantee you that'll be in the scrap heap.
11:43
You'll be going to the tip. Come or just first drop a rain
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is going to rust. Get something that's you know, I can't take it,
11:52
you can take it right. I'm not gonna say brand names, but
11:56
there's some American brands, Australian brands that are savage, savage, and you
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gotta be going over two hundred quid. You got it? Yeah, you
12:01
got I mean, like, you know, if anybody knows a good barbie,
12:05
it's the Australians, right, They literally invented I don't know they invented
12:09
what. Maybe they didn't. I think the Brazilians and the probably the Argentinians.
12:11
The top of the pile on that sofa, I'm fairly sure cave men
12:15
invented open. I think you're probably right. I think you're probably right.
12:20
There's no Neolithic lads there just like and listen, listen, here's the thing.
12:24
If you're going to I'm not into cook and I couldn't care less.
12:26
Here's the thing. Do you like drinking? I mean, do you like
12:31
drinking outdoors in your own on your own premises, in your own comfortable gear,
12:37
But can't find a purpose because the rest of the family might look at
12:41
you oddly because you're just standing out there by yourself with your own thoughts.
12:46
Because that's a glorious place to be, is to stand outside with your own
12:48
thoughts and a bottle of beer in your hand. No lies detected here,
12:52
tom Now, you don't have an excuse to be out there, and you
12:54
may look like you know, you're starting to lose the plot. But if
12:58
you have a set of tongue in your hander and you're feeding your family from
13:01
outside, well, all of a sudden, you've gone from zero to hero
13:05
under for under two hundred and twenty euros. Do you know what I mean?
13:09
You know, like every time you're talking to me, buddy, this
13:11
is going up by twenty euro Okay, So we're gonna buy a charcoal barbecue,
13:15
right, charcoal barbecue? Right? Personally, I have a Weber.
13:18
It's an American brand, very old school. They have a long standing to
13:22
give you a ten year guarantee, which I like. They give you a
13:24
ten year guarantee for the entirety. Well, okay, do you know what
13:28
I mean? Falster ribbons? Oh, they go. We'll recondition it for
13:31
you, or do you want a new one? That's what they do.
13:33
I got it as a wedding present to myself for three hundred quid. Do
13:37
you know what I mean? That was six years ago. The thing still
13:39
looks exactly the same as it did, and I've cocked a lot of that
13:41
thing. So we got a barbecue, right, we got a barbecue coals.
13:45
You attempted to get the cheap best coals again, you waste your money.
13:48
They won't get hot enough. Just get the slightly more expensive ones.
13:52
You'll get him in the garden center. Do you know what I mean?
13:56
You can get you'd see even the range two great ones now made out of
13:58
coconut chills would burn for three hours. So okay, that's what you're at
14:03
now. You want to go for the basics. You want to get the
14:05
basics right, obviously you're burrogers. Well before we sorry, before we even
14:09
get into food, Tom question for you, because I actually asked some people
14:13
on Twitter like about barbecues and oh my god, did your community? Why
14:16
did you do that? Why did you do that? Next to being the
14:20
cyclists? Wow, this is it. The they told me to get like
14:24
a charcoal chimney, which is like a do hickey for what am I?
14:28
What am I? What am I doing? What am I doing? Here?
14:30
I could step outside, I mean this is for the audio listens.
14:33
I can step outside and literally show you what I me a cult. But
14:35
I should have said that straight off the bat. This will speed up your
14:39
life. This will buy you hours in your life. It's for all the
14:41
world. It's a and six inch maybe seven inch pipe. Then the pipe
14:46
about a foot long, it's about it. Inside that pipe about four inches
14:50
up, there's a just a mesh, just a wire mesh inside it.
14:54
And what it allows you to do is you fill up with the cols,
14:58
yes, and underneath then you can set little little lighters, little lighters underneath
15:03
it. And because it's it's in the tube, it just sucks air up
15:07
crazy and gets those hot yeah, inside a couple of minutes. If you're
15:09
if you're throwing all your coles in, just throwing the lighters in there,
15:13
you may go off and watch the omnibus of EastEnders because it won't be hot
15:18
for about an hour and a half. Okay, this chimney allows you to
15:20
just get these. Now. You'll see there's loads of companies making like little
15:24
hair dryers and everything that actually blow air on this on the goals to get
15:26
them glowing and stuff and all the rest. The lighters give me a pain
15:31
in my pipe looking for that half decent ones because you can't just throw a
15:35
zip underneath there. Because yeah, well here's the thing, very simple one.
15:41
I think I did a video on this years ago. A bit of
15:43
kitchen roll, maybe about seven pieces of it, rolled around your hand,
15:46
and curl it up into it so it makes a little cup of okay,
15:50
you know, and pour maybe two tea spoons of cook and oil into the
15:54
middle of it. Set that on fire. That works, as I that'll
15:56
burn for about ten minutes. Story, it's a great fire, lighters,
16:00
swear to god, it's a great f Every every every year at Christmas when
16:03
we watch Home Alone, we see Kevin hang a thing on the door that
16:07
goes mad hot, and when Joe actually comes up, he puts his hand
16:10
and burns. And I never knew what the hell that thing was. But
16:12
that's like a barbecue heating element. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
16:17
yeah. I guess if you wanted, you can buy and it will heat
16:19
up and starter calls and and and ward off intruders as well. Exactly.
16:23
Yeah, burn the hand up of I gotta tell you we had that and
16:27
has My kids are industrious if they even had a sense of a burglar outside
16:32
the hang it on the door. Just melt the PVC door door just in
16:37
case as well. Just leave there. Yeah, just can swing it.
16:41
Yeah, okay, so we're born, and now we're born, you need
16:44
I would advise people, go what gear. I guess you'll buy these kids
16:48
all over the place. You'll get these kids half and you won't use But
16:51
you do need a dacent metal splashes spatula for flipping things because some things will
16:56
stick to your your grills. You, I would suggest, right, there's
16:59
no joke just getting three sets of tunnels. Always have three undergo for the
17:03
uncooked shite and the cook shite and then the presentation shite. That's what you're
17:07
doing, right, So you don't want to be handling raw chicken with the
17:11
same time just because you lift borgers over on. You just don't You just
17:15
don't like, but you'll always be glad you did, be like grant clean
17:17
one. Now I can just actually present in front of people with this thing,
17:19
like you know what I mean, So I think, okay, that
17:22
works gear wise, there's not. That's pretty much you up and cooking.
17:26
You're rolling like I mean, I'm not going to push you down the lane
17:29
where I've ended up because you know, I'm getting into me thermometers that are
17:33
ludicrous, you know, and all sorts, but that will get you up
17:37
and rolling. Right. Are you happy you've got all the gear jar?
17:40
Yeah? And I need like one, I need like a big sort of
17:42
brush to clean the grills when all of a sudden anywhere brush should be done.
17:47
Because with the great thing about the likes of the Weber crowd. Again
17:49
I'm not Ocean Weber, but they are very reasonable at buying replacement grates and
17:55
stuff like that. And in the six years I've only replaced it twice.
17:57
And okay, it was fifty graters, you know what I mean. It
18:00
was it was easy. So now we're up up in the gear. But
18:04
now let's get into what everybody wanted wanted to hear what are you gonna cook
18:08
your What do you like? What do you like at a barbecue? I
18:11
like hot dogs. Okay, I'll eat burgers, you know with the hamburger
18:18
is waning even from you know, a burger place. Do you know that's
18:26
it's very interesting you say that because I am that way too. I'm waning
18:33
from the burger and I don't know what's done that because I just the thought
18:37
of it isn't exciting. It's just the way. Yeah, I wouldn't sit
18:40
down in order, But I do like chicken breast. I like a good
18:42
chicken breast cooked and then maybe we might throw a little bit of hot sauce
18:45
on that. And so okay, so I'm cooking chicken breasts and lamb chops
18:52
and how you don tom how you don't. What do you got for me?
18:55
The big sausages? Okay? Yeah, so you know you're not having
18:59
brisket, Jerry. That's that's a twelve hour affair and we'll be talking till
19:02
tomorrow's. But here's the thing. If you want beef and you want it
19:06
in the you want to go traditional, right, you want to go tradition.
19:07
You want to say, you know what, I want to look like
19:10
I know how to barbecue, right, I'm not going to teach you out
19:11
to souckn egg. You can cook a sausage, you know what I mean.
19:15
You can cook a exactly. You can find the best. There's some
19:18
great Always make your own burgers if you can, because they do taste better.
19:22
They do. Meat balls taste better, meat burgers taste better. You
19:25
can pull you can. You can then gloat to people that come to your
19:27
barbecue that you've made the burgers yourself. You can get the little petty makers
19:30
and all the rest of it. The one one trick that I've ever given
19:33
anybody for the crack. When you're making a burger, right when you're about
19:37
to start rolling it a ball, have some frozen butter. Right this sounds
19:41
crazy. Have some frozen butter, and then take the cheese greater and you
19:45
know the tiny little yea yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, great in just
19:48
a little bit of butter into each one. But because it's frozen, it
19:52
won't melt in your hands as you're rolling the burger. Yeah, that's a
19:57
juicy burger. So if you've gotten say a lean angus mints, which is
20:00
you know you're going to get her for the angus. If you have any
20:03
respect for your your friends and family comment yes, this will give it a
20:07
nice little oh yeah, yeah, yeah, and you don't even have to
20:10
tell him like what do you reckon? They go, how has he done
20:14
it? It's a cheeky little cheat, but but there goes with beef.
20:18
Guess why they're from? Yeah, yeah, neighbor delivery system we were talking
20:23
aboutlier exactly. So you want to look like you know what you're doing it.
20:30
If you want to show your barbecue king, queen whatever, you want
20:33
to be very simplistic ones like a fere right, get yourself down to your
20:37
local butcher and get yourself some beef ribs or pork ribs, whichever you want.
20:41
Don't go to the supermark because they're all sort of bacon ribs. The
20:45
amount of lads have had messing me gone, these are kind of I said,
20:48
did you read what the pack said? Yeah, oh it's bacon.
20:51
So bacon has already been infused with a Brian You don't that's for boiling,
20:55
don't know, don't don't that's for having bacon a cabbage night during the winter.
20:59
You know what I mean? What you don't you want to get to
21:00
the boat and get purely poor. Start with pork because it's easy. Or
21:04
get him to pull off the there's a little member in the inside that's no
21:07
more att Yeah, it just doesn't cook down right, and you'll ruin people's
21:11
teeth. It's like, what am I doing with this? Just get it,
21:15
get it off. He'll rip it straight off for you. What do
21:18
you want to do with that? Very simplest here's a pure cheet I've smoked
21:22
him for four five six hours jar and you're looking at bone, bone exposure
21:26
and all the rest of it. Here's the cheat. Here's the cheap.
21:27
The old one taught me. Whatever barbecue sauce you've gone for, right,
21:33
Yes, make a load of it. It's really easy to make. Go
21:36
look at a recipe. In fact, there's a recipe up on my page.
21:38
Go look at I'm literally look at you down the camera. Gun.
21:41
You should be ashamed of yourself. You can't put this together kind of a
21:42
scenario like I used to make barbecue sauce with yeah, and brown sugar.
21:48
That's brown sugar. Yeah, that's pretty much it. That's it, and
21:52
a little bit apple sider any you know what I mean, don't fan?
21:56
I know, I know, I know. But you want to get a
21:59
little bit, you gotta as much you like as that into some boiling water.
22:02
Get it boiling. Put in some season that you like, like with
22:04
pork, you know what I mean. Say you want to put in a
22:07
bit of paprika, a little bit, whatever you want to do, do
22:08
it. I've seen people in fifty to fifty Coca cola fifty to fifty water
22:12
Coca cola. Chuck your ribs into the pot. Boil them for an hour.
22:17
The bones will expose themselves. Now take it out trin they damp it
22:22
off and butter it up, or cover it in your favorite barbecue sauce I
22:26
either one you made or the one you bought. Yes, chuck it up
22:30
in the grill there. Tell nobody. Make out like you've smoked them for
22:33
four or five hours. Nice. They will be tender as hell, and
22:36
they're going to get that charred, charred thing you're looking for. And they
22:38
need only beyond the grill for five six minutes. Love Its simple as that,
22:42
right, love it. Boil the bestern thing in whatever you want.
22:47
Something sweet, it's gotta be sweet. Goes with pork chicken wings. Very
22:49
simple a steak. Get that barbecue as hot, open all events as hot
22:53
as it can. Get your chicken wings, dowse them in your favorite stuff
22:59
chickens season. How's that your chicken seeds? Your favorite one? But here's
23:03
the kicker that nobody knows. But they're about to lurt go it in small
23:07
Now. You can test this on and off, but I never go too
23:10
much. I would never do more with it. Like your standard packet the
23:12
chicken wings, I would never do more than a half a tablespoon. I
23:17
have a teaspoon, a bigger pardon of bacon soda. Choke it in.
23:22
What that does It pulls all the fat out of the chicken and makes it
23:25
go crispy on the outside. Oh no, yeah, and that's the cheat
23:30
nobody can ever get. They always go, why am I you can me
23:32
slim it? It's because you didn't know the chemical trick? And yeah it
23:37
was the that's a good one. Time was like, you know, I
23:40
do like a chicken ing myself, but I like a crispy chicken wing.
23:41
They're not like battered and deep right. I wouldn't give it Toppens for that
23:45
really, but I do like a crispy chicken wing. But also a saucy
23:49
chicken wing. So it's like, what are you gonna have? You're gonna
23:52
have saucy or crispy. You can have both, yes, he turns out
23:56
you can. Yes, you can. And here's how you're gonna have both.
23:59
Right, So you've it up as hot as you can, I mean
24:02
a million degrees, because these wings will cook regards. You're not looking to
24:04
cook through a big sided beef, you know what I mean, You're not.
24:07
This is a chicken wing, for God's sake. You're looking at about
24:10
four about probably about twenty five to thirty minutes, right, because you probably
24:12
get it up to about four hundred degrees, turn them halfway, turn them
24:17
half weight. You see she's bubbling up all over place there, right,
24:18
How are these chicken wings spitting so much stuff? It's they're getting out of
24:22
the stuff. Love it, then get them off. But while you're doing
24:25
that, get ready your whatever your favorite hot sauce slash buffalo sauce with if
24:30
you want to go back a few episodes we mentioned if you yes, frankly
24:33
amazing hot sauce, take a bottle of that, take a take the quart,
24:37
Take a bottle of that and a quarter pound of butter. Put the
24:41
two of them together on the pot, whisk them. That's your hot sauce.
24:45
That's hot sauce. That's your hot suce. It seems add Butter is
24:48
the is the key to a lot of this time. Butter and sugar.
24:49
I had to tell you it's you know, that's things good. That's how
24:55
you make things good. Dip your chick Dip your chicken wings in that real
24:57
quick, a little bit of a just enough, and then get him back
25:00
on the grill to keep the crispinus and give the rest to the people who
25:03
want to tip. But it's got they've got that crispy buffle of flavor.
25:08
And anything after that. I'm not telling you how to cook sausages. I'm
25:11
not telling you how to cook burgers. I'm not telling you how those two.
25:14
If you can do your chicken wings like that and your ribs like that,
25:17
people would go this person knows there shit I'm telling you about here coming
25:22
back here. One hot tip for anybody this is I don't care whether it's
25:27
gas or or what got or cold. Here's a class tip. You'll find
25:33
all sorts of fancy sprays for anti stick and see anti all this. Yeah,
25:37
yeah, the best one of the whole lot, just prior to your
25:41
cooking, and you've given it a bit of a rub down with the wire
25:42
brush or whatever, and you're ready and you think, oh, that looks
25:45
clean. But I could wish you would. Your stuff wouldn't stick to it.
25:48
Cut you have an ingen have an onion, right, yam? I
25:52
thought you're gonna come with another stick about right here? No, I would
25:56
if I could, but jama fark into the back end of it that still
26:00
has the skin on. Chop it with the skin online, yeah, and
26:03
the raw side that's got all the juiciness thrown out. Rub it back and
26:07
forth in that grill as many times as you like, and that and the
26:10
young unianus it will. It's not only the onionon is actually burns off,
26:15
but it's an it's an antioxidant, so it kills anything that's on that bacteria
26:18
wise, and it's anti stike for anything you throw up on it. Well,
26:22
then things really do have layers, don't they. There's a gift that
26:27
keeps given. Yeah, So that's you after that if you I guarantee,
26:32
if you pull off that move, you'll have enough of an ego serotolin boost
26:34
from everybody high five, and in that you will go and YouTube the rest
26:40
of your barbecue life. You know what I mean. Go do that.
26:41
You'll be into it then, because it's all about the payoff. If you
26:45
get the payoff right, and people go, oh my god, I love
26:48
this, and the serotonin kicks in, you're like or the dope, mean
26:51
or whatever it is that you're looking for, you go Jesus Christ, they
26:52
love me. I think I'm the new barcue guy in the neighborhood. Well
26:57
that those two things do things will get you off the raises. I will
27:02
never answer a question outside dishes. Get out of my face. You can
27:06
literally make or buy them ready made. Get yourself together. Don't get your
27:10
life together if you can't. You know, if you're asking me about side
27:12
dishes, I don't want to know. You're a meat turning man. What
27:17
look. Leave them for the the people that are interested in that kind of
27:21
stuff, you know what I mean. Leave that's your guest. Tell your
27:23
guests to bring this same. Let me, let me, let me,
27:26
let me, let me bring this to a close. Tom that if we're
27:27
declaring the second the third week in May, start of early June as the
27:33
official start of barbecue season. When is the end of barbecue season? You
27:37
see, it's it's gotta be, it's gotta be into August. We got
27:42
to have that fourth of July into August. Ah, God, you do,
27:47
and I mean you don't. Children are going back to school early September.
27:48
You're about to have a barbecue there as well. All right, you
27:52
don't want to normally get the good water. Yeah, you don't want to
27:53
be this sad guy you know, still cooking barbecues at Christmas, because that's
27:57
that's me. That's why addiction that Jerry and you maybe don't want to end
28:02
up down there, you know what I mean. You may not have an
28:03
understanding wife or husband, or maybe you do have somebody who wants who doesn't
28:08
want you outside the house cooking and smelling like you know, God knows what.
28:11
But look, this is me being from a selfish point of view.
28:15
Every single year, my birthday is September twenty first, every single year,
28:21
it's always been dacent enough. Whether you know where a fellow could wear a
28:25
hoodie and be grand outside, do you know? Right? So that's where
28:30
I'm thinking. I think we wrap it up the second to third week of
28:33
September, because you are down now, the leaves are starting to come down
28:36
out of the trees. You're kind of gone. It might be time to
28:38
throw cover on this thing. Right well, that gives the fine listeners to
28:41
the Tom and Jerry Show sixteen weeks of barbecue and goodness, and we want
28:45
to hear all about it all right now, I'm taking Tom's word for a
28:49
lot of these things, as I do with a lot of these things.
28:52
Do you agree or disagree with them? Hey, don't get in my case
28:56
about it. Let's get them in the comments and see what's going on here.
28:59
And you have you as hoodlumbs out there, you gaszlers. You're all
29:03
about the guzzline. You let us know about it. But other than that,
29:06
Tom, thank you very much. I swear to God. I said
29:07
it before and I'll say it again. I should have done home economics quicker
29:11
than I did carpentry, quicker than I did metal work. That's cool.
29:15
I think a month of home economics. You think the good that would do
29:18
me? You think I think we probably? You probably. I had no
29:22
to add bacon so ordered to chicken wings. I would imagine what am I
29:26
going to do? With a doubletail joint. I say, it's the first
29:29
second week of of homeodyonamics. I imagine is barbecuing I would have I can
29:33
only I can't see it going any other way. I can't. I can't.
29:38
So yeah, I got any and anytime I find myself saying even just
29:41
like running the house and one thing and another. Oh god, they didn't
29:45
even try to teach us this at cool. Yeah they did. You just
29:47
weren't doing it because you were over here wilin metal for no good. Goddamn,
29:52
there was a lot of filing metal. There was a lot of filing
29:53
of metal. Any we're going to move on the show, Thank you much
29:57
again for that, my good man. We're gonna move on the show by
30:02
bringing in a very special person, Tom, someone very very special. You
30:06
know, the kind of person I'm talking about, the kind of person that
30:08
when you're discussing them, we're not going to bring anybody. No, this
30:11
is the Talma Jerry show. This this is we're not going to physically bring
30:15
a third person into No, maybe down the line, but not now.
30:18
When you when you're talking about that kind of person, you known someone would
30:22
say a blow, you know, someon would say but realistically, if you
30:25
want to properly throw your hands at this scenario, you don't say no this
30:30
letter, you say this lad. Now there's that guy and this week.
30:40
Yeah, I've never heard of this week this lad he is. I'd never
30:44
heard his name written down. When I seen him, I was like,
30:45
oh okay, I can again me this guy called gild brand Reth and he's
30:49
an aged man. He's a UK celebrity. I'd never say. He said
30:55
he was in Good Morning Britain. I'm not a fan and he presents a
30:59
bits and pieces on This Morning. Again, don't really know him all that
31:03
much, but he's one of these guys. He's of the old British entertainment
31:07
kind of industry and I believe like a Tory MP. He was conservative.
31:10
Yeah, yeah, he was conservative. So it was Tory, yes,
31:12
yeah, yeah yeah for Chester, which would be I don't know, it
31:18
would be pretty Tory. Yeah. I think it would be hard to win
31:21
a seat for the Green Party there. So Giles brandret Is came under our
31:26
crosshairs this week, Tom because he claims he claims and did claim this week
31:33
on John Cleese's podcast, John Clees Is a podcast, I swear to God
31:37
Tom, it's UNBELI we've opened the flood gates. Well, let's let's just
31:41
say John Cleese presents a podcast. John Lees has nothing to do with the
31:48
business that is the podcast, but as named it, and he gets a
31:52
cat. He gives that directly to one of his ex wives. Gild Brand
31:57
claimed on that podcast that he is responsible for the death of Rod Hole.
32:05
What a state Like when I saw it and it was like, whoa,
32:08
Okay, this guy is clearly going to be arrested. Do you know what
32:12
I mean? This is rod Hole? This rod Hole. Anybody wondering who
32:15
Rod Hole was? Yeah, there's layers to this one. This is like,
32:17
you probably need to explain rod Hole if people are kind of gone,
32:21
I've heard of and his impact on our lives and yeah, well spoiler layers.
32:24
Subsequent death may or may not have been at the handsome gilds Brand Rag,
32:28
But go on ahead, Tom, who is Rod Hole? So rod
32:30
Hole he was? He was, I mean, he was a comedy act
32:34
I was. I mean, he was a comedian. But famously he I
32:37
mean he was a strange looking bloke, you know what I mean. He
32:39
had those giant teeth and all the rest. But he was his It was
32:43
his partner in crime that really set him off and allowed him basically to be
32:47
outlandish on any TV show he was ever on, and it was just it
32:52
was this really shite puppet on his hands. It was really shit. Em
32:58
you, rod Hole, and em you like, I mean, we've all
33:04
felt sorry if you know, you look at the comic who's had to drag
33:06
his cello around because this is part of his thing. Like, but I
33:08
mean, I couldn't have sat in a green room with a bloke who was
33:13
just going so yeah, anyway, Jesus, this great gig I was doing
33:15
the other night and sorry his on mind, that's my bag there with my
33:20
fucking em you in it like that, right, But I massive respect for
33:23
rod Hole. I got if you see, here's the thing. Time we
33:25
came up in a time when rod Holl had his own and several TV shows.
33:30
We'll get into them in a second, but the gimmick was that he
33:31
had an em you with him, rod Hole, and you where you saw
33:35
one, you saw the other one. Yeah, And as you say,
33:37
rod Hole, is this willy wanta look and gangly looking just like dude.
33:43
They don't make them like they used to. Okay, if you think people
33:45
can't put put a face to it, if you think of what Frank Spencer
33:49
used to look like, he'd kind of that looked, didn't he like,
33:52
you know, wild eyed? And he had he had his buddy em You,
33:54
which was his pet. Em You was a big blue and orange poppet.
33:59
And what rod Hole would do would he would control the puppet as you
34:01
would imagine spoiler alert is not a real board. He put his hand up
34:05
in it would control the the animal's beak. But then there was like a
34:07
fake arm draped over Emu. So at a glance and looked like he was
34:12
carrying them. If that was a quick glance, Terry, I can tell
34:15
you that much because Emu didn't even look like an emu. No, I
34:22
mean, do you know it's like back in the eighteen hundreds, like if
34:24
somebody brought out like a picture of a tiger like or any strange animal.
34:29
Yeah, yeah, the platypus And what do you call it? Well?
34:31
I should, I should, bloody you think it's a It's an elephant,
34:34
of course, isn't it. Montgomery? You're like, what, of course
34:37
is an elephant? You know, pretending like we've seen an elephant. Whoever
34:39
named that puppet clearly had never seen had he never seen anything in their life.
34:45
So what EMU was mute. It didn't talk. So it wasn't even
34:47
triloquist act like Orvil or one of these guys. We couldn't move in the
34:53
eighties for puppet boards. To be honest with you, EMI wouldn't talk.
34:58
What Ron holl would do is he would go up to celebrities with em you
35:02
and he would sock them right in the face. He'd hit them in the
35:08
mouth as hard as he could legally do so, and then he'd start shouting
35:14
at im you no, im you don't grab him, don't grab him,
35:15
and he'd be just like smacking them, Yeah, like giving them overhand rights
35:22
to the to the juggular. That was It was Michael Parkinson. I want
35:24
to say, there's a famous I think he dragged Parkinson to the ground and
35:31
and and and they're like like, if you can imagine he has his hand
35:37
which is of course Emu's beak, so it looks like em you is biting
35:40
Michael Parkinson on the neck. But an actual fact, if it's a mechanic
35:45
out Yorkshire's favorite son, David Parkinson ges because I remember seeing like the clips
35:52
from that and I think it was Billy Connley on that one as well.
35:55
And even Connley was kind of whoa you know, to be on the pail,
36:00
but like comana come on, but it was it was. It was
36:04
spectacular physical comedy. There's another clip of em you. It's Rod Hole.
36:09
He's out and about in Tesco or whor not, probably in Hole and in
36:15
Hull. So he's in Tasco in Hull in the shopping center and like a
36:17
chest freezer and he's like, oh im you, I have to get fish
36:21
fingers or what have you, and em You grabs Rod by the throat and
36:25
throws them into the chest freezer and then slams the door shut with him on
36:30
the chest Fraser, which knowing what we know that this is Rod Hole doing
36:34
this all himself. He literally fight clubs himself. He literally like drags himself
36:39
along the ground and he choke slams himself. He gives himself a choke slam
36:46
into the freezer and slams a shot and this was Rod Hole was big noise
36:51
in the seventies and eighties and into the nineties. He had a TV show
36:54
Tom I don't know if you ever watched it was, I mean it was
36:57
the eighties. They did things different. It was called EMUs All Live Pink
37:01
wind Mill Show, which yeah, you know, I mean the Have you've
37:07
seen a sign on the on the street for emu's All Live Pink wind Mill
37:12
Show Today you'd be like, Okay, well, I guess that's where a
37:15
stag party or a hen party, Hen party are going, because they did.
37:17
You want to see the pink windmill. They just still do it nowadays
37:22
you find it in but Jesus, back in the ages, they didn't care.
37:24
They just came out whatever they want. They didn't care but that it
37:29
was big news. And here we bring us to a close. Rod Hull
37:35
died at the age of sixty three Tom in nineteen ninety nine, and we
37:37
hadn't been on TV for a while then. Maybe I was he was definitely
37:40
still on the road because I was probably turned. He'd fallen out of certainly,
37:45
if not the public consciousness, certainly mine because I was like nineteen,
37:49
I was watching out for Rod hol You know what the bridges are like for
37:51
nostalgia, like they will they were rocking. He I remember Darryl O'Brien was
37:55
reading his book and he was he toured kind of nearly behind Hull at all
37:59
he venues, He was maybe a day or two behind him, and he
38:02
was packing out these places. It was like, I was amazed because he
38:06
was I was unlocked the week at the time, and this guy I just
38:08
thought he was you know, like everybody, but he was packing these places
38:12
and what he was doing was doing two and a half hour shows on every
38:15
night, two and a half hour shows. He just couldn't fathom how the
38:19
man was doing it. But anyway, onwards, But yeah, but anyway,
38:22
on me, on we go. So you know, rod Hole died.
38:25
Here's the thing, he died in a manner that informed public behavior going
38:34
forward. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was actually, I mean there
38:37
was a PSA really in what he did, wasn't there, like exactly?
38:39
Yeah. Yeah. If you ever if you've ever seen any of the PSAs
38:43
from our Youth where it's like, oh, Jimmy with Frisbee's going up the
38:46
pylon, yeah, come up and get it. And then and then like
38:50
he fries the death and it's like, don't let your children claim pylons like
38:54
rod Hole did one of those in real life. Yeah, for real,
38:59
real I mean, the only thing is the only way this could have been
39:04
made. I mean, the guess he did have the last laught and we'll
39:07
talk about his funeral in a minute. But the only way this could have
39:08
been more, rod Hole, would have been if you went up you hadn't
39:14
been like that time him Like I can't form a picture of it in my
39:20
mind where EMU is not with him. Yeah, he's up there, he
39:22
imagine, like he's trying to get something out of the here and he was
39:25
looking at it. You for you for serious? Are you for serious?
39:29
Right now? This is just bullshit. We'll we'll, we'll bring people up
39:31
to speed. What happened with rod Hole was he was watching the UEFA Cup
39:37
or the Champions League final, whatever it was. It was a big final,
39:39
a big European Cup final and whatnot, and he had bad reception and
39:44
couldn't see the TV. So we went outside and climbed up a ladder in
39:47
the middle of a thunderstorm to fix his aerial. A gust of wind came
39:53
and knocked him off his ladder, off his roof. He fell two stories
39:59
and died later that night in the hospital. As a result of his injuries
40:02
and I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only person in the world now that
40:07
anytime I go up a ladder to do anything, my wife will tell me
40:12
be careful, don't do a rod hole. And all of a sudden,
40:15
your hand starts talking to her, like just right, like when I'm putting
40:17
up the crew, you say Christmas, when I put up the Christmas lights
40:20
of Christmas if it's you know, Christmas is not good weather. It's normally
40:22
quite windy or like not as dry as it possibly could be. And I
40:27
don't know that looks like rod hole weather out there. I don't want you
40:30
going up a ladder. So that's what happened to rod Hole. But why
40:34
now, does Giles? You would you? Would you? Actually? Sorry,
40:36
Tom, you had a story about his funeral there, let's hear that.
40:37
I don't know so yeah, yeah, so this is where it Actually,
40:39
this is a bit, I suppose a bit of lightness to the whole
40:43
thing. He this is a pretty pre planned move in his in his will,
40:47
and as the coffin was being brought into the church, which is a
40:53
better place to do it altogether then because it's nice, echoey and stuff like
40:57
that. Yeah, she had the sound effect play from inside the coffin of
41:01
a beak cracking off the inside of the coffin, which is absolutely brilliant,
41:10
brilliant. I mean, you know, leave him laughing right, Oh oh
41:15
god, I love it. I've heard of a few and I would.
41:19
I'd love to do something like. I mean, Spike Milligan on his gravestone
41:22
famously has the words I told you I was sick. The best one of
41:28
those I know is Jack Lemon's tombstone. Go on, just reads Jack Lemon
41:34
in ah, brilliant, brilliant, brilliant. So Rod Hall is now dead
41:42
nineteen ninety nine, so it's twenty five years later, and nobody question that,
41:49
Tom right, No, no, no, it was he fell off
41:52
the roof. It was actually confirmed by the police's an accidental death on Tailor
41:55
Course's former Good Morning Britain. Yes, and and step forward this week's this
42:01
Lad Giles Brandrath, who claimed on The John Clee's show to have killed a
42:07
man a hell of a thing to just blurt out in the middle of a
42:09
podcast. I mean, you're not getting that out of me. And the
42:13
Tom and Jerry Show. It's a good way of getting your own podcast if
42:15
you just want to know what I mean. It's a it's a good way
42:19
to incite follow up questions. I will say that, yes, yes,
42:22
yes, hence what found us here right now talking about this guy that I
42:25
would never have dreamt of till the day I die otherwise. And if this
42:30
is true, God level right, yeah, it's it would play on your
42:35
mind this moment, because was it. The two of them were at it.
42:37
They were at the theater. They were at a theater in holl Or.
42:42
We're not no, sorry, Rod Hole is a man. They were
42:45
not in hole. Giles Brandreth was not in Hole. Don't write that down.
42:47
Whoa, whoa. But they're doing some theater show or some such and
42:53
Giles Brandreth was there and Rod Hole was by all accounts real sad sacked.
42:58
They was given out the He wasn't going to be able to watch the show
43:01
later on because the sky wasn't working properly. He was cribbling about this juror
43:06
while in the audience watching the show. It's to the point that he was
43:08
nearly interrupting the performance. Side yeah exactly. And he's there saying, ah,
43:14
geez, you know what, I'd love to go home. I can't
43:15
wait to get out of here. I hate this show, you know.
43:17
Daryl Breens on next, but he's cribbling, given out about the show,
43:24
and he wanted to go home and watch the football. But he seems to
43:27
have been like one of these But you know, you ever fall across a
43:29
boy that you can't help? Yeah, you know. But also it's like
43:34
when you come across the field. We were like, man, I'm time
43:36
in a place. We're in the middle of a show. Here can you
43:37
We've talked about this in the drive home. Look what are you like?
43:39
You know? But he's given out that the show is no good in not
43:44
holding his interests. He'd rather be at home watching the football. But even
43:46
if he does leave to go home and watch the football, his aeriel's not
43:50
working. Well, what do you want me to do for you all?
43:52
At that stage? Now you are he's old a bit of a right.
43:57
Yeah, yeah, that's when Giles Brander gave him. He's look, it's
44:00
a real simple rod. Go home, get your ladder, go up,
44:05
tweak around with the aeriel and get a picture and watch your football. Yeah,
44:08
And I dare say in Giles's mind he was saying, don't be fucking
44:12
giving out to me. A bit. Yeah, yeah, Now we're done
44:14
with that. Now on with the show, like we should have to watch
44:16
this, And I mean true, I mean I've I've given you loads of
44:22
advice down three years, and I would dare say you haven't followed one millisecond
44:27
of it. Not much of the time. No, No, And I
44:29
don't expect you to tey a lot of it. Is I'm gonna go down
44:32
to the shop and buy a b Yeah, of course you are, And
44:36
you know what, I'm totally okay with that. But but but but what
44:39
we want to do here now for Giles Brand is we're gonna have like a
44:44
mini trial form. Do we find him guilty? I mean, what would
44:47
he even be guilty of? Here? Tom? In incitement to manslaughter?
44:53
It's well, I mean who manslaughtered him? To win? Who manslaughtered who?
44:58
I mean all like, I mean, if I'm acting on behalf of
45:00
the man, all can say is that he gives some advice. Now,
45:04
did he clarify in what weather conditions to go up there? He know?
45:07
Did he mention Helton safety you know, Ppe gear? No, he didn't
45:09
mention any of that. But right, Paul was a grown man, we
45:15
must say, so you shouldn't have had to tell him to check the ground
45:19
was sturdy enough to take a ladder. Yeah, yeah, I'm assuming he
45:22
was probably up at the area. I'd say he went, he got right
45:25
up to the area. Oh yeah, like you survive a two story you
45:29
know, you break your legs left, but you're coming. He's any sixties
45:31
at this stage. And sometimes the British I find age very badly. Have
45:37
I ever told you that, you know, you'd offer meet a person sixty
45:39
one or sixty two from Britain that I found and they've just decided I'm old
45:45
now and they just start perming their hair and wearing cardigans and stuff. You're
45:47
like, you're not that old, Like I know sixty one year olds that
45:51
are still rocking it. Like do you know what that is? Antiques roadchho,
45:57
no, go on, That's that's what it is to hate in your
45:59
heart. It's true, It's true. I'm was staunch Republican, There's no
46:07
doubt about it. This podcast has taken a weird turn, but listen here.
46:10
Like the Giles brand Red thing is really like if someone was annoying your
46:15
tell if someone was passing you off, and you're like, oh, I
46:15
wish you just dropped dead and then they dropped dead. Are you responsible for
46:22
that death? Is that a notch on your gun belt that one knows to
46:27
nose? Yeah to degree Marley, Yes, actually no, not at all,
46:31
because you can't like I've okay, I'm gonna give you a bit of
46:35
advice. You won't take it because you're sensible, but I'll tell you advice
46:38
that I've told people beforehand. Yeah, if they're if they're drilling for hanging
46:43
shelves around like this, and they're like, I'll go up on a buy
46:45
a stud detector because I want to make sure I'm not drilling into a gas
46:49
pipe, and I'm like, like, your house is not this riddled,
46:52
complicated, nervous system of gas pipes, do you know, Like if you're
46:59
if you're not hanging something directly over a socket or a socket, you're probably
47:06
all right. It's not like this, this network of cables and death traps.
47:10
So you're going to be grand. Don't worry about it now. Is
47:15
it on me if they do hit a pipe? Yeah, but in the
47:22
at the end of the day, the decision to drill it without a stood
47:23
finder was there. It's not mine. I gave my opinion on it.
47:30
I did not give an order right enough, and there you go, there
47:32
you go. Did here's the thing that's fair enough? But did Giles given
47:39
order or was it a throwaway well, do you know what you it's very
47:45
very careful how he worded it. Did he say, yeah, well,
47:47
do you know what you should do? You should go home now and if
47:51
it will shut you up, get up on the roof and started out yourself.
47:53
Or did he say, hey, Rod, you know what you gotta
47:57
do, don't you. You got to go home. You got to get
48:00
out your ladder, get up there and change that area to sort this out.
48:02
That's two different things. One's advice and one did you turn around go
48:06
like, you know, real sarky like sounds like a job for mister ladder
48:09
if you ask me, Roger, Yeah, yeah, I mean, look
48:15
jerr, whatever way you look at it. I think he did kill him.
48:19
I'm just gonna come straight off the fence. I think I don't see
48:22
many ways he did kill him, But it's in these one of very strange
48:25
ways, almost like a double jeopardy scenario, like he just can't do him
48:30
for it. You can't do it. You can't do it. You can't,
48:31
you can't hold it. And like, how will I say this?
48:35
Tom? It's his word against his ward. I think he's the only person
48:39
saying this. Yeah, unless anybody else heard him that night in in in
48:44
the watch mccullor in the in the theater. Now, how do you feel
48:50
about Do you think he's guilty? I don't know, And I honestly don't
48:53
know why he wouldn't have taken this to his grave, which can't be all
48:57
that far away with the best respects. I think because he was in front
49:00
of John Cleese, and John Clees is the reverend bastard at the best of
49:02
times, you know what I mean? He comes out, you know,
49:07
yeah, you know you know what? I think it would be Hoover's Tom
49:08
to investigate this a little for the But regardless of which child Brandreth, you
49:14
get away with it for now, we've got an eye on you. Hearland
49:17
will give you a suspended sense. He's exactly, he's somewhat, he's he's
49:22
fairly, he's a fairly. It's kind of course the small but too because
49:29
he doubled down on this. Did you hear that he doubled down on it?
49:31
Now, what do you do. He So he was going on and
49:34
he had this chat and all the rest of it, and he said,
49:37
I also killed another man. I think he said Jesus Christ. He says,
49:42
yeah, he said when back when he's you know, I was Conservative
49:45
MP for the City of Chester. He's I killed Harry second. He was
49:50
one of the goons he would have been in with with. Yeah. Well,
49:55
he came off the phone with him. It was a the phone interview.
50:00
Now, this is this is, this is now. There's a bit
50:02
of a stretch in this. I get my pinch of salt over here,
50:06
and I'm going yeah, yeah, yeah. He came off the phone with
50:07
him, and the actor slipped and fell backwards down the stairs and ded and
50:15
you know, I mean, unless he said something really funny closing the call,
50:21
you know, but he I think he probably got the the response he
50:25
wanted out of clease at that stage, I'll yeah, I'll give you one
50:30
time. Now, this didn't happen, but it always played in my mind.
50:32
It was one of these like things that were such a near miss that
50:36
I was like, God, damn like it. My heart stopped at a
50:40
pal and were they were a big laugher. Okay, So there were real
50:45
sort of theatrical throw your head forward kind of a laugh kind of a thing,
50:49
right, you know what? And yeah, not for nothing time more
50:52
funny people like, you know, we'll be cracking wise all this kind of
50:54
thing. I'm happy for to be laughing like that, you know, I'm
50:58
happy for them laughing that. But we're in the pub and they threw their
51:02
head forward like a big theatrical laugh like and missed a pint glass by like,
51:07
I mean a quarter of an inch, so they nearly like smashed their
51:14
face down into a pint glass. I'll never forget it. My heart stopped.
51:20
I was like, God, damn, you were like millimeters away from
51:22
smacking that thing. Now if they had hit that, would I be able
51:28
to turn around and say, I glass my friend? Yeah, if it
51:30
makes you sound hard, I think so, Yeah, it would make me
51:32
sound like that's some supernatural powers that you made somebody laugh so much that the
51:37
Yeah, that's why they named themselves. Are you over there you want to
51:42
hear some yuckucks and smash yourself on the face. Who is guilty in all
51:45
this? Let us know in the comments. Should Giles Brandreth ever be allowed
51:50
on a podcast again? Not this one anyway, one and done with the
51:53
Tom and Jerry show. Tell you that much. Yeah, you know he's
51:57
in his late seventies as a British man, he's not got along for this
52:00
world. Now he's all right. And as for one undone, Tom,
52:02
we are one undone with this week's episode boom Man, two segments and we
52:07
oudy nearly nearly Jerry. But if I was to do this, how does
52:14
that make you feel? I gotta we got to get into the segment real
52:17
quick, Tom, because I know we have to do a little I know
52:20
we like to do a little pantomime with this segment every week. We got
52:23
to get into it real quick for the audio listeners. Right now. I
52:28
we got we got it. We gotta start a round. Let's start a
52:30
round. Start around my head, two minutes, don't stop. I am
52:37
wearing a flat cap, which I am proud of. I'm very proud of.
52:40
It's given to me by a late family member. Very very proud of
52:44
this hat in that I think it looks cool A meter yes on till yeah,
52:52
like look over your your your left shoulder, look at one of our
52:55
heroes, flat cap wearing a man at the well, Fred dibna, I
53:00
have to help with the yeah now, but Tom, like, I'm not
53:06
going to come to you and start a row about flat caps, because that
53:08
flat cap that you're wearing and understand has sentimental value to you. But regardless
53:13
of whether it does or doesn't, I'm sure you have other sentimental, non
53:16
sentimental flat caps. I have three flat caps. I think I've got three
53:20
of it. I think I've got three of them. Yeah, the tweed
53:23
in nature flat cap, a culture cap, an Aulman cap, if you
53:28
will, Tom, it has made it into city life. I think a
53:30
lot of people's city life they'd like to wear the tweet jacket and pretend that
53:34
they're they're of the country set, you know what I mean, and they
53:37
drive a you know, brand new you know, range Rover or Defender or
53:39
whatever, just to feel herein lies my contention, Tom, I put it
53:45
to you now in a row starting manner, that flat caps have been ruined
53:51
by several things, and now an ordinary decent culture like you or I cannot
53:55
wear a flat cap without looking the like, yeah, like a ball back.
54:02
Yeah it is. No. I think we're starting to probably looking to
54:07
start a route, because I'd say the two is are probably in on this
54:09
because something has been taken from us, yes, yeah, and that whether
54:16
it be cultural appropriation, I don't know on our behalf, but it is
54:22
an iconic culture thing to have is your flat cap, you know, and
54:27
like you know, it's it's it's a hard blue color thing to beware,
54:30
like it's a blue color and it's a bit Hailey ray no harm like you
54:35
know. But at the same time they're they're cold cheese. So yeah,
54:37
yeah, I think we can at least agree that they are. They are,
54:42
But there's been a few points of popular culture down through the years where
54:46
they have been appropriated. The flat cap very much and one that sticks out
54:52
more than others. And again, I can never buy the hype anything and
54:55
I can never I can. I just can't buy the hype. And do
55:00
you know what it turns me one hundred and eighty degrees when I see other
55:04
people getting so into a thing, I'm like, oh, you ruined it,
55:07
you ruined it. I know what you're gonna say, Peaky Blinders absolutely
55:13
ruined or below it flat cap And I'm not saying do you know what,
55:16
I'll go so far as to say. Killian Murphy is an actor the restumer
55:20
actors. It was probably a hat of the time from the early part of
55:23
well the peaky in Peaky Blinders is a peaked cap, but it is the
55:30
bo baggery. Yeah, the humans that end up trying to emulate and Murphy.
55:35
Yeah. And it was a short jump from the Peaky Blinders audience too,
55:38
flat caps showing up in Magaluf Oh Jesus right, yeah, and now
55:45
it's and then from there a short short jump to McGregor and the UFC man
55:52
and all of a sudden, we've lost flat caps, We've lost tweed waistcoats,
55:58
Like, what's next, Tom blackthorn sticks? What are we losing that?
56:00
Oh? For God's sake, Well, you know what. I'm so
56:02
glad that they took to all wearing Hunter wellies because there isn't one single country
56:07
person, true country person will wear actual Hunter wellies because they're loaded sh eyes.
56:10
Could just have a bear dune ups or if you want to go ultra
56:14
like me, I wear muckmasters, and muckmasters only have done for twenty years,
56:19
but they Yeah, there's been there was a solid trajectory off going nowhere.
56:25
Working class people who needed a cap that was both utilitarian, could be
56:31
rolled up, put in your pocket. Yeah, wear masks, could chuck
56:36
it in the washing machine. You know, it needed to do all these
56:38
things keep the head warm. But you could listen out for you know,
56:40
heavy machinery possibly going to swipe you in the side. Yeah yeah, yeah,
56:45
if there was a man wouldn't need you anywhere near it. You knew
56:47
that, you knew you he was coming for you. Like I can tell
56:52
you one celebrity that wouldn't have been caught by that EMU, the man to
56:57
make the legend, Fred Dibner. He wouldn't. He would absolutely broken his
57:00
arm slash neck before it even got within a fist distance in that man's face
57:06
because he heard what was coming. He was wearing flat cap and nothing down
57:10
over his ears, but the sun was out of his eyes and the rain
57:14
was trickling down off the sides with the in built guttering that's on it.
57:17
But yeah, it wasn't to be fair, there was an appropriation of our
57:22
culture a while back to and I don't know who thought it was a good
57:27
idea, but it was probably flagshipped by I'm sure he's a nice man,
57:31
but he's done some knobbery things in society and He's at the butt of so
57:36
many jokes, even for a very talented man. But by god, he
57:38
did. If I do this, If I just do this, Jerry,
57:42
if I put it the other way around and I say, no matter,
57:50
We're never the heck yeah yeah, the bar remember that. You remember that
57:55
that ship that went down, like the insult, the insol to my ancestors.
58:01
You doing that, put that on backwards and singing with it on.
58:07
It's even just as like like as like Tom, we get along I love
58:12
recording with every week, and when you put it on that cap, just
58:15
like fire raised up in me. You heard it. You listen back to
58:20
the audio the minute you people weren't watching, just to be more aware of.
58:24
I could hear your heartbeat coming up. I could hear there was a
58:28
grumble in your voice. Yeah, your stomach had gone from oh to and
58:32
and all all all I was, but I was like, all right,
58:35
here comes a load with opinions that I'm going to have to fucking suffer through.
58:40
It was just that instant, It was just that immediate. We're gonna
58:44
put a side by side comparison like Tom with and without. I'll try and
58:47
dig mine out here. I don't know where it is. It won't go
58:50
on me with the ponytail, which I suppose is it's a matter of concern
58:53
in its own right. Tom. And we're not in that fight, Jerry.
59:02
The hat wins in that fight, but they are. They have been
59:06
ruined. You cannot put one on that. I think we can agree on
59:08
that. Yeah, I would have to be honest with you. I would
59:10
have to. And this is really insecure of me. If I was at
59:15
a hunt meet, or if I was at something which I don't get to
59:19
go to an awful lot of you know, you put the harriers and stuff
59:21
like that. You'd see lads sometimes put them on. I'd probably keep mine
59:25
in my pocket until I meet a couple of lads who are already wearing them
59:29
in their correct environment. That's how selfconscious now I've become. Something. Isn't
59:34
that terrible that our culture has been stripped back so much by these fucking impostors.
59:40
I reckon, if you're at the hunt time, you're bigger fights to
59:43
fight country sports for country people, Jerry, and I will not take a
59:47
backward step on it. I would. They did people in Leinster House,
59:52
and that's all I know anyway. But that's yeah, that's a scrap for
59:55
another day. Folks, do you wear a flat cap? Are you wearing
59:58
a flat cap right now? You got your ear pods in and your flat
1:00:00
cat Like, we want to know your opinions on it, and if you
1:00:07
don't give us your opinions, we will wrestle them out of you. I
1:00:09
swear to God. I swear like you know, we don't. Don't leave
1:00:14
us as an echo chamber here all by ourselves, because then it becomes unhealthy.
1:00:17
You know, two dudes having a good time telling you they went to
1:00:22
hear looking we went from looking like ordinary decent cult sherees with our flat caps
1:00:25
onto all of a sudden, it's like, oh, right, is the
1:00:28
guy Richie movie. I'm just gonna do this again. No murder people.
1:00:35
You have to see Jerry's face. He's just he's furious. Is that absolutely
1:00:39
furious. I have no idea where this came from, but there was a
1:00:43
time in the late nineties, early two thousands and where I would have seen
1:00:46
it. There was the guy in the wrestling would wear one he would wear
1:00:52
like a backwards black leather. Was he a passive guy? Yeah? Begin
1:01:00
triple it And I'm like where did you get here? You have one as
1:01:02
well, because there was a letter one, there was a on all,
1:01:06
there was a backwards black leather What are we doing here? Yeah? Yeah,
1:01:09
and luckily that that didn't that didn't live past nine to eleven, Tom,
1:01:14
that was gone by then. Do you know who else it could take?
1:01:16
It should be actually taken up and saying one was related to the Court
1:01:20
of Human Rights or the Court of Culture rights that you say, keangle had
1:01:24
a lot, they had an absolutely yeah, yeah, they had a walking
1:01:29
scandal on their hands. For why didn't you just take the headdress of sitting
1:01:32
bull and just go ahead and you know, put a kangle, but you
1:01:36
can put it the other way around the cagle. Maybe maybe that's the cap
1:01:37
I'm thinking of. But in regardless of which today was discussed the Year of
1:01:40
a Lord twenty twenty four, the flat cap has. Yeah, let us
1:01:45
know your opinions on it. We've given you hours, and if you do
1:01:47
want to let us know your opinions on it, you're going to need to
1:01:51
find us on your Find us on social media at Tom and Jerry's show on
1:01:53
Twitter and indeed Instagram, and you'll find me and Tom not far behind what
1:01:59
else gonna do? First, Tom, whatever platform you're listening to right now,
1:02:00
if you just tuned in, what if the tuning is is still a
1:02:04
thing, do please hit hit subscribe on whatever platform you're on. I had
1:02:07
somebody message media other day and they aren't still on Apple, so things are
1:02:12
kind of slow to probably arrived to Apple. I can only apologize for that
1:02:15
or not I can do about it. But you can leave comments on Apple
1:02:19
and you can rate as well, so same as Spotify, same as a
1:02:22
lot of that. You can actually rate, give it the top rating,
1:02:23
so it becomes more visible to other people follow us. As Jerry was said,
1:02:27
if you wouldn't mind sharing it, maybe a screen grab, throwing it
1:02:30
out there on your socials, letting us know exactly your opinion on it.
1:02:32
So when we post this on the Thursday and you've listened to it, go
1:02:36
back in and just go, oh, yeah, I feel this strongly about
1:02:38
Siching touch, or I have this advice about chicken wings, or maybe you
1:02:40
should put a chicken wing in further of them in a flat cap through your
1:02:45
Emo Emo ND yeah, So whatever your opinions are, please Twitter is great,
1:02:54
Instagram is great. Put your comments underneath that and at least that way
1:02:59
Jerry, who our myself, we'll see him be able to reply to him,
1:03:00
yeah, and forward onto the next one. So yeh, that's it
1:03:05
Tom, I'm going to go barbecue in a flat cap while I'm going to
1:03:07
go roll around with that that vibrating cawa in the field there. If that's
1:03:12
all right? Yeah, show up. Yeah, hunter killers are closing in
1:03:15
right. That's it. Good luck, Good luck. Tom and Jerry Show
1:03:19
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